2023-01-18

Content warning: descriptions of physical and gender-based abuse.

In August 2022, University of Michigan alum Sophie Zhang filed a complaint to the Equity, Civil Rights, & Title IX Office (ECRT). She alleged that her father, Youxue Zhang, a professor in the University’s Department of Earth and Environmental Sciences, abused her on the basis of her identity as a transgender woman.

In her complaint, Sophie described two instances in which Prof. Zhang engaged in abusive conduct toward her, with one occurrence on U-M property while Sophie was an undergraduate student. She argued that Prof. Zhang’s abuse constituted misconduct under U-M policy.

Formal complaint filed with ECRT in August 2022. Obtained by The Daily.

Sophie’s complaint was dismissed two days later by Elizabeth Seney, ECRT’s director of sexual and gender-based misconduct and Title IX coordinator, according to emails obtained by The Michigan Daily.

Seney stated that ECRT would not investigate the matter further.

A year prior, Sophie spoke of the abuse she faced as a transgender woman in an interview with the MIT Technology Review. Prof. Zhang denied the allegations against him at the time. His name was not revealed in the article.

The article came out while Sophie was the subject of international media attention for exposing widespread usage of fake Facebook accounts by multiple countries’ governments in 2020.

In an interview with The Daily, Sophie alleged Prof. Zhang physically abused her when she was a child on the basis of her gender identity. She alleged that, in 2010, when she was an undergraduate student at the University, Prof. Zhang disowned her after she told him she intended to transition.

In an email to The Daily, Prof. Zhang admitted to engaging in physical abuse against Sophie in one instance in 2004 and disowning her in 2010. He denied that his actions were based on her gender identity.

“I admit that one time I did lose my temper and hit (Sophie) in 2004, but not for (her) transgender identity,” Prof. Zhang wrote. “To all of my family, students, colleagues, and friends: I apologize that I let you

down.”

Prof. Zhang said he was not contacted by ECRT or U-M administrators about Sophie’s complaint.

Prof. Zhang has taught at the University since September 1991, and has held a tenured position since May 1997, according to records available on the University’s Board of Regents website.

Speaking on behalf of the University, spokesperson Rick Fitzgerald explained that grievances between family members may not qualify as misconduct under U-M policy. He declined to comment on the specific allegations against Prof. Zhang.

“It is U-M policy to neither confirm nor deny the existence of an investigation into any form of

her gender identity, she feared what might happen if her father found out.

“I knew from the start … that (Prof. Zhang) would react violently and angrily if he found out,” Sophie said. “And he did find out when I was 13.”

One night, in the spring of 2004, when Sophie was in eighth grade, her father found out she was transgender. She said she felt threatened, and locked herself in the bathroom out of fear.

While her father allegedly tried to force his way in, Sophie considered running away.

“It had rained not too long ago, and I remember that because I remember thinking that the ground was soft outside,” Sophie said. “I pried out the window screen, because I was considering jumping out of it … I

UMich Professor

with his bare hands.

“He began beating me repeatedly,” Sophie said. “(He was) yelling threats and insults … He continued until he was exhausted. I was covered with bruises and blood.”

Sophie later described this incident as “an impromptu form of conversion therapy” in her complaint to ECRT.

Speaking on the condition of anonymity, a family member who was present in the house at the time confirmed Sophie’s account of this incident in an interview with The Daily.

The Daily also contacted a classmate of hers, who verified that Sophie came to school with bruises the next day. This source told The Daily that Sophie described the abuse to them at the time.

After the 2004 incident, Sophie said she hid her transgender identity, fearing further abuse from her father. She decided to transition a few years later, but waited until she was financially independent to inform her parents of her decision. She told The

In

confirmed Sophie’s account.

In his email to The Daily, Youxue Zhang admitted to disowning his daughter in 2010, but did not say where this conversation occurred.

“I apologize to (Sophie) for the 2004 hitting and 2010 disowning you (sic),” Prof. Zhang wrote. “I only learned their transgender identity in November of 2010 when they sent an email to me. I was shocked at the time. I did not handle it well and lost them.”

Prof. Zhang did not comment on the allegations that he made insensitive comments about transgender identities during this meeting.

‘Professor Zhang chose to go beyond … threats of violence and commit it directly’

Sophie cut off contact with her father after their 2010 meeting. She initially decided not to report the incident or the one in 2004 to the University, citing a desire to move on. When she spoke to the MIT Technology Review in 2021, she identified her father as her abuser but did not reveal his name or his position as a U-M professor.

After becoming a public figure in 2020, Sophie said some of her relatives and friends in Ann Arbor reached out to her. She told The Daily she learned her father may have engaged in abusive conduct with others, and decided to report her own experiences to ECRT. The Daily is currently investigating whether there have been other allegations of misconduct against Prof. Zhang.

“I was contacted by a lot of people, including friends I had fallen out of touch with,” Sophie said. “It was related to me in passing that my father has had other victims. I’m not going to go into the details, because that’s the story of others to tell.”

misconduct,” Fitzgerald wrote. “A matter involving family members may or may not fall within the scope of the university’s policy. If a matter arises solely in the context of family interactions, the university does not have much ability to address the matter under U-M policy.”

‘I was panicked and terrified … looking for an escape’

Sophie’s family moved to Ann Arbor when she was a few months old. In an interview with The Daily, she described how she questioned her gender identity from a young age.

“I was 5 or 6 at the time,” Sophie said, “For me, it was basically something I always knew in the back of my head.”

As Sophie continued to discover

would probably have broken my leg. But I was panicked and terrified, and looking for an escape.”

Sophie alleged her father yelled threats and attempted to break down the door. Fearing what would happen if her father got to her, she contemplated her options.

“I sat there staring out the window for a few moments trying to … decide whether or not it was actually a good idea to jump out the window,” Sophie said. “Eventually, I came to the conclusion that it would be preferable for me to stay in an abusive household rather than end up homeless.”

Sophie opened the door. She alleged her father dragged her into the guest bedroom next door and beat her, first with a belt and then

In the 2021 MIT Technology Review article, Prof. Zhang denied that the incident occurred.

“When reached by email, (Sophie’s) father denied the allegations,” the article said. “‘I am sad that she alleges that I beat her as a child after I discovered her transgender identity, which is completely false,’ (Prof. Zhang) wrote.”

In an email to The Daily, Prof. Zhang admitted to engaging in physical abuse against Sophie in 2004. He denied targeting Sophie for her gender identity but did not elaborate on the circumstances of the incident.

‘He could no longer be my father’

Vice President Kamala Harris visits Ann Arbor

to talk climate action

Harris and Secretary of Energy Jennifer Granholm engage with student sustainability activists

SAMANTHA RICH & GEORGE WEYKAMP Daily News Editor & Daily Staff Reporter

students, faculty and community members gathered to hear from Harris and other local, state and federal elected officials.

LSA junior Lashaun Jackson, co-president of the Student Sustainability Coalition, began the event by speaking on the opportunities for U-M students to lead sustainability initiatives both within the University and the nation as a whole.

“Unlike those who will give

speeches in a minute, we, as students, actually get to roll up our sleeves and do the work right here on campus,” Jackson said. “Literally sticking our hands in the ground of the Campus Farm, growing food for each other and distributing it at the Maize & Blue Cupboard, using our collective voice at Board of Regents meetings just for our sustainable leadership, connecting with our surrounding communities in Ann Arbor, Ypsilanti, Detroit to help support their own sustainable paths.”

In an interview with The Michigan Daily after the event, U.S. Secretary of Energy Jennifer Granholm, former Michigan governor, said she and Harris made the trip to Ann Arbor due to Michigan’s influence in the automotive industry and the prevalence of climate activism on the University of Michigan’s campus.

“Michigan is the center of the transportation universe — people here have it as part of their

DNA,” Granholm said. “We want to electrify the transportation system. If you’re going to reduce CO2, 30% of carbon pollution comes from transportation.”

In an interview with The Daily before the event, Music, Theatre & Dance junior Donovan Rogers said he has worked to combine art and activism in his time on campus and was excited to learn from Harris and other speakers to help inspire his work.

“I’m the founder and artistic director of the DR’s Laboratory, which is a Black arts organization that’s focused on creating liberatory Black spaces,” Rogers said. “I think that having the opportunity to see Vice President Kamala Harris is a part of that pursuit, as she is the first woman and first Black woman vice president … I’m really just here to be a sponge and to learn about these issues and witness this historical moment.”

Read more at MichiganDaily.com

targeting her gender identity.

“(My father) gave me an ultimatum: that if I continue down this terrible, self-destructive route, he could no longer be my father,” Sophie said. “He’s not disowning me, he explains. Rather, I’m disowning myself, because I’m rejecting the very name, the body, the identity and life he made for me.”

Sophie alleged Prof. Zhang went on to make insensitive comments about transgender people. She said he warned her that “everyone would be forever suspicious and disgusted (by her)” if she transitioned.

A family member of Sophie’s told The Daily they heard about this meeting from both Sophie and Prof. Zhang soon after it occurred, and

NEWS BRIEFS

In an email to ECRT on Aug. 3, 2022, Sophie described Prof. Zhang’s abuse. She wrote that she was a U-M student when Prof. Zhang disowned her in 2010, and specified that the incident occurred in his office on campus. The Daily has obtained copies of this email correspondence.

Sophie’s email to ECRT on Aug. 3. Obtained by The Daily.

“In late 2010 when I was a student at the University of Michigan, Professor Zhang formally disowned me for being transgender,” Sophie wrote. “This took place in his office in the Geology Department … This gender-based harassment created a deeply hostile environment at the University for myself as a U-M student.”

UMich professor Peter

returns to teach, following not guilty verdict

SAMANTHA RICH Daily News Editor

Content warning: This article contains mentions of sexual misconduct

Peter Chen, professor of Electrical Engineering and Computer Science at the University of Michigan, has returned to teach at the University after a Washtenaw County jury found him not guilty of criminal sexual conduct.

University spokesperson Kim Broekhuizen wrote in an email to The Michigan Daily that Chen returned to teach Friday after having been on paid administrative leave since January 2021.

“Following an acquittal on Dec.

5, 2022 in Washtenaw County Circuit Court, Professor Chen will resume his duties as a professor in the division of Computer Science and Engineering on Jan. 13,” Broekhuizen wrote. Chen faced trial in the Washtenaw County 22nd Circuit Court for one charge of criminal sexual conduct in the first degree and was found not guilty on Dec. 5, 2022.

In an email to College of Engineering students obtained by The Michigan Daily, Engineering Dean Alec Gallimore said the U-M administration is in support of Chen’s return while recognizing that students may feel apprehensive about this change.

Daily she feared her father would cut her off financially when she came out.

the fall of 2010, while an undergraduate student at the University, Sophie told her father in an email that she planned to transition. Prof. Zhang told The Daily he recalled receiving this email.

Sophie recalled arranging a meeting with her father in his office on campus in the North University Building. During this meeting, Prof. Zhang disowned Sophie and allegedly made offensive comments

Read more at MichiganDaily.com

Sophie Zhang alleges abuse against

Zhang claims her father abused her on the basis of her transgender identity

Design by Sara Fang

JULIAN WRAY Managing Investigative Editor

Chen

After two years of leave, Chen was found not guilty of criminal sexual conduct and is back in the classroom

Vice President Kamala Harris

visited Rackham Auditorium Thursday afternoon for a conversation on the state of climate policy, student activism and environmental justice in Ann Arbor and nationwide. Over 500

El Limōn opens near North Campus

New restaurant brings Mediterranean and Mexican fusion cuisine to North Campus

Consistently ranked as one of the top places to live in the country, Ann Arbor’s appeal relies heavily on its numerous and delicious restaurant options. Taking a walk down any street yields a rich sensory experience as everything from Asian and Italian to Mexican and American cuisine options excite the eyes, nose and taste buds.

Recently, a new fusion restaurant popped up on the northside of town. El Limōn introduced a new blend of Mediterranean and Mexican flavors to Ann Arbor when it opened on Nov. 4. The restaurant, nestled between The Songbird Cafe and Curry On, an Indian Street Food hot spot, on Plymouth Road is bringing new flavors to the area around the University of Michigan’s North Campus.

El Limōn’s menu offers dishes that combine the two unique flavor palates, bringing creations to life such as: crispy falafel tacos, spiced chicken shawarma burritos, rice dishes with yellow flour tortillas, nacho chips and lentil bowls.

Ali Hijazi, owner of El Limōn, was born in Lebanon and previously ran the two ‘Zamaan Cafe’s, a Lebanese cuisine style restaurant in Ann Arbor. Hijazi said he believes the combination of Mediterranean and Mexican cuisines is not novel, noting commonalities between Mediterranean and Mexican cuisine.

For instance, Hijazi said there’s a fine line separating a burrito from a pita wrap — it all comes down to the type of bread and the spices and sauces.

“So, the burrito that you see, the flour, or the tortilla, of the taco is nothing but pita bread,” Hijazi said.

“When we are cooking, whatever we use in Arabic cuisine, so many

ingredients are common with Mexican cuisine.”

LSA freshman Isaac Hintz expressed curiosity towards the idea of Mediterranean-Mexican fusion. He said the two cuisines are individually among his favorites, so he would be interested in trying them together at El Limōn.

“Mediterranean food is probably my favorite food … and then Mexican is probably my second or third favorite, so I think fusing those would be pretty good,” Hintz said. “I’ll have to try (El Limōn) for myself.”

When creating El Limōn, Hijazi said he saw an opportunity for a restaurant in Ann Arbor that combinated these cuisines. He said he hopes his customers will see the connection between Mediterranean and Mexican food styles.

As for the future of El Limōn and the Zamaan Cafes, Hijazi said he is somewhat concerned about finding

employees to work at the restaurants long-term. He told The Michigan Daily he has not had many people ask about jobs. He said the issue may be symptomatic of a larger industry-wide worker shortage that has plagued the restaurant scene since the start of the COVID-19 pandemic. Currently Hijazi’s family members are working at El Limōn as cashiers and cooks to keep the doors open, but only temporarily until they finish their studies at school.

“We can barely handle these businesses now,” Hijazi said. “We can’t find workers. This is a big problem for the restaurant industry now.”

Despite the shortage of employees for Hijazi’s restaurants, Hijazi shared that he hopes to make El Limōn a space for the cultural fusions to flourish by having live Spanish and Arabic music play inside El Limōn.

“We’re hoping to bring live musicians, (so) they can introduce the customers to the fusion of music,”

Hijazi said.

Eric Kaldjian, an employee at the U-M North Campus Research Complex, recently visited El Limōn with his family to celebrate his birthday. He said his family loves Mediterranean food and they were all excited to try El Limōn’s menu.

“(My family and I) were so looking forward to coming here that we came here for my birthday lunch,” Kaldjian said. “We all loved the Middle Eastern food from Zamaan (Cafe). So we concluded that El Limōn is likely to be very good also. And our conclusion was correct.”

Kaldjian was with his wife, Cynthia Stiles, and their son. They all said the food was delicious, and Stiles added that she was especially interested in the unique combination of cuisines.

“I was curious about how the fusion between Mexican and Middle Eastern flavors would work, and I have to say it works very well,” Stiles said.

Campus reflects on Santa Ono’s first semester

Students

Since Santa Ono took office as the president of the University of Michigan 88 days ago, the football team beat Ohio State for a second time, the 2022 fall semester finished and Ann Arbor experienced a frigid winter blast. Ono’s presidency marked a hopeful change for many organizations on campus, but has Ono lived up to his expectations in his first semester as U-M president?

Rackham student Amir Fleischmann, Graduate Employees’ Organization contract committee chair, told The Daily he has overall hope for Ono’s administration, but some issues from past administrations still persist.

“Lack of transparency is something we associated with President Schlissel,” Fleischmann said. “We really were optimistic that President Ono would be turning a new page. So far, we haven’t seen that happen, but we think there’s still time and we generally look forward to working with (him).”

Fleischmann said he hopes Ono’s administration will work more with its students and faculty when it comes to labor and other University affairs.

“We really want him to work with campus labor, to work with students and faculty to manage the affairs of the University together, and create a fantastic place of learning,” Fleischmann said.

LSA senior Russell McIntosh and co-programming chair of the Black Student Union (BSU) told The Daily he does not want to see Ono forget about Black students at the University.

“We want President Ono to remember that Black students have real and pressing needs,” McIntosh said. “They’re extremely important. We want to see progress.”

On Nov. 1, the BSU released their “More Than Four” platform, which calls on the University to provide more support for Black students by increasing Black student enrollment, expanding efforts to combat antiBlackness, improving DEI policies and investing in K-12 education to improve equity. Ono expressed support for the BSU in a tweet after

professors reflect on Santa Ono’s first semester as U-M president after fall 2022

flyers promoting the More Than Four platform across campus were torn down.

LSA senior Kayla Tate, BSU’s speaker, told The Daily she thinks one way Ono seems to be backing change on campus is by making promises directly to students.

“I know that one of his big priorities has been building trust and that he’s been meeting with a lot of students,” Tate said. “I definitely have been hearing a lot of promises about improvement.”

Tate said while she has hope for Ono’s future as president, she is still hesitant to blindly accept Ono.

“We’re hopeful, but not naive,” Tate said.

LSA junior Jacob Sendra, vice president of the U-M chapter of the Citizens’ Climate Lobby (CCL), said in an interview with The Daily he believes Ono’s first semester has gone swimmingly in terms of his commitment to the environment.

“I think we are very optimistic about the direction of his first semester, especially in regards to sustainability,” Sendra said.

The CCL focuses its efforts on enacting sustainable climate policy by fostering relationships with lawmakers. Sendra said he’s hopeful Ono’s tenure could increase

sustainability efforts on campus because he seems willing to listen to student climate organizations.

“We feel like we have the potential to form a real fruitful partnership between our organization and a lot of other climate organizations on campus that we’ve been talking to, with this new administration that can bring about some real positive change in regards to sustainability,” Sendra said.

Kirsten Herold, president of the Lecturers’ Employee Organization and School of Public Health professor, told The Daily she thinks Ono’s first semester has gone fairly well and has been a welcome change from past administrations.

“He’s willing to have a more ongoing relationship with union leadership, which is something that has been missing from not just the most recent president, but several presidents before that,” Herold said.

Herold said she believes Ono still has a lot to learn and that she thinks the University community should give him more time to acclimate to the campus climate before criticizing him.

“(The University) is a very big place, and it’s a lot,” said Herold. “You know, he’s a smart, energetic guy, but there’s a lot to learn and get

to know. And so personally, I feel that people who want to criticize him for one thing or another, it’s a bit unfair because he just got here.”

Central Student Government President Noah Zimmerman, an LSA senior, told The Daily he feels that while there are some areas of improvement for Ono, he believe’s Ono’s first semester went well because of his willingness to learn.

“He’s been great,” Zimmerman said. “Is there room for improvement? Yes. He has to learn how the University works still. And he’s still learning, still asking questions, but he’s asking the questions that need to be asked.”

CSG Vice President Jacqueline Hillman, an LSA senior, told The Daily she believes Ono truly cares about helping students.

“One thing that I can say very confidently is that President Ono genuinely puts students at the heart of every single initiative that he started to carry out,” Hillman said.

Hillman said she has hope for the future of Ono’s administration and believes Ono can help repair some of the damage done by past administrations to create a better future for the University.

PHOTOGRAPHY

Editorial Staff

HANNAH

Business Staff

The Michigan Daily (ISSN 0745-967) is publishing weekly on Wednesdays for the Winter 2023 semester by students at the University of Michigan. One copy is available free of charge to all readers.

and

EMMA MATI/Daily

The exterior of El Limōn located at the corner of Plymouth and Nixon in Ann Arbor Sunday morning.

There were a lot of films this year. Many films about films. Many biopics. While some of them we regret watching, others were thoughtprovoking, made us think or feel differently than we thought possible, or at least gave us an unparalleled movie-going experience. Of all the films we loved, these are the ones we think you should get out to the theater (or onto your laptop) and watch immediately — the Film Beat’s top 10 films of the year.

— Erin Evans, Senior Arts Editor and Zach Loveall, Film Beat Editor

Batman”

10. “The

“The Batman” is a superhero movie done right. Centered around the cat-and-mouse chase between vigilante hero Batman (Robert Pattinson, “Tenet”) and serial murderer the Riddler (Paul Dano, “The Fabelmans”), “The Batman”

calls into question what justice looks like in the face of corruption.

Director Matt Reeves (“War for the Planet of the Apes”) crafts the perfect villain in the Riddler — one that exists not in direct opposition to Batman, but as someone with similar values and wildly different methods. Catwoman (Zoë Kravitz, “Kimi”) is a link between the two conflicting forces, acting as the bridge between Batman’s glamorous billionaire life as Bruce Wayne and the less privileged background of people like the Riddler.

Three hours is the perfect time frame for intrigue to blend into action, for quiet moments to spark romance and for fear of the Riddler to turn into hope for a better life.

Powered by Pattinson’s strong performance as a Batman beginning to find his place in the world, Reeves leaves us with more to think about than just a superhero saving the day.

Batman may have won the battle against the Riddler, and viewers may have enjoyed the excitement

of seeing the hero defeat the villain, but we’re all losing when the line between good and evil, between right and wrong, is more blurred than ever.

9. “Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery”

I prepared for “Glass Onion” a couple of months ago, meaning I popped some popcorn and rewatched “Knives Out,” convinced that maybe with some practice I could solve the complex murder mystery introduced in the sequel. In “Glass Onion,” I was impressed again by the humor, the wit, the character dynamics and, unsurprisingly, the twists. The sequel cleverly replicates everything I loved about its predecessor, but does so with more glamor, more drama and more flash.

“Glass Onion” uses all of its 139 minutes effectively, crafting a visual and auditory masterpiece.

The best books of 2022

The year 2022 has come and passed. A snowy winter turned into a gentle spring, and the subsequent glowing summer settled back into a bone-chilling fall. The Earth has again wound itself around the molten Sun, and once again we have aged, mourned and loved through the world’s exhaustion. Alongside the ebb and flow of our annual heartbreaks, deadlines and other varieties of fresh experiences, books have followed. We’ve allowed ourselves to get lost in daydreams of fiction, the battles of historical fiction and the mysteries of horror. Books have offered sanctity against the turmoil of each day passing. While 2022 may have been tumultuous, it was nothing compared to the novels it produced.

From New York Times bestsellers to indie darlings, The Michigan Daily Book Review has created our definitive list of the best books published in 2022.

— Ava Burzycki, Senior Arts Editor, and Ava Seaman, Books Beat Editor

Classic” by Sloane Crosley

“Cult

Call me a snob — I was skeptical of a book that was heralded as “inventing a new genre,” especially a book with a name like “Cult Classic.” Bracing myself for an

on-the-nose novel with a strong concept yet low levels of execution, I was almost shaken by the visceral flashbacks of the unpredictable, apparently jumbled past of recently engaged New York writer Lola as she curiously begins running into her exes across the city.

As “judgemental Virgo moon” Lola continues to encounter her previous paramours around every street corner, one begins to wonder: What’s really happening here? The novel peels back a mystery that operates on multiple levels, which, as a fellow judgemental Virgo moon, I couldn’t help but love.

The narration is Crosley dialed to her max; gems such as this one permeate the text: “‘Do you have a McCarthy Genius Grant yet?’ she asked. ‘Not yet,’ I said, trying to relax my face. ‘Still chipping away at that communism.’” It’s been months, but I am still stunned by the artistic and entertaining qualities of “Cult Classic” — I hesitate to say more and ruin the story, but I’ve urged everyone I know to pick up this book for sharp takes on loving and living in the zeitgeist. Reading this book made me discover what the entire world already knew: Sloane Crosley is hilarious.

— Meera Kumar, Daily Arts Writer

“Carrie Soto is Back” follows Taylor Jenkins Reid’s acclaimed successes, “Daisy Jones & The Six,” “The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo” and “Malibu Rising.” Jenkins Reid is a literary force to be reckoned with — she specializes in setting, each of her books focusing on a specific era and location with such absorbing details that one wonders if Jenkins Reid is a time traveler herself. “Carrie Soto is Back” begins at the 1994 U.S. Open with our protagonist, Carrie Soto, one of the best tennis players of all time. The book tracks Carrie’s rise, going back to her childhood in the ’70s when her father (an all-star tennis player himself) started to train her. Jenkins Reid effortlessly captures the intensity of Carrie’s career and the significance of her position as a Latina woman in sports, commenting on the intersectionality of Carrie’s and other players’ identities while also masterfully describing numerous tennis matches. Carrie’s relationship with her father provides another layer to the story, allowing us to see Carrie in different lights as she navigates familial, platonic and romantic relationships on and off the field.

“Carrie Soto is Back” proves that TJR is an author you shouldn’t miss and that her stories are worth rooting for.

— Lillian Pearce, Daily Arts Writer

Digital Culture’s 2022 Year in Review

DIGITAL CULTURE WRITERS

2022 was a year that felt like my humanity was restored. Morbius memes. Gentleminions. “No Maidens” jokes from Elden Ring. In 2020 nature was healing, but in 2022 WE were healing. For the most part. Some of us felt the need to cheat at chess while others felt the need to cheat on our wives (hey Try Guys: I’ll join your troupe of goofy dudes). Looking back at everything in this article makes me feel a bit wistful, but also glad that all of it is behind us now. If I had one word to explain the year, it would be “debaucherous.”

— Hunter Bishop, Senior Arts Editor

Honestly, it feels like too much happened this year for my little peanut brain to comprehend. Artificial Intelligence is able to produce art and writing at unprecedented quality, but with risk of ethical infringement. So many TikTok trends happened that I deleted the app. Those still in the TikTok trenches are braver than I am. We bravely defended Android users, Barbie girls and babygirlifiers. Spotify got wrapped. Video games got gamed. Below is a collection of our most important moments in Digital Culture 2022 — some enjoyable to discuss and some necessary to mention. It was truly one of the years of all time, but we look to the future now: It’s 2023in’ time.

Johri, Digital

— Saarthak

Culture Beat Editor

January: Elmo, AKA the reason Gen Z is so sarcastic

If you had told me that the start of 2022 would be marked by an Elmo renaissance, I wouldn’t have believed you. Well, maybe it isn’t all that surprising given the state of internet humor nowadays, but hopefully, you get my point. It all started when a clip from “Sesame Street” went viral in late 2021, in which Elmo raps about “a plastic water bottle and a paper towel roll.” Everyone began pointing out how sassy Elmo sounded in this song, and it resulted in other clips of the lovable red monster making the rounds on TikTok at the start of the following year. Some notable ones include several of Elmo’s appearances on late-night talk

shows and the resurfacing of his long-standing feud with Rocco, the pet rock of another Muppet named Zoe. People were quick to realize just how chaotic Elmo could be, finding him relatable and even going so far as to say that he is the reason Gen Z is … well, the way we are. Though his snappy sarcasm helped us ring in 2022 with a laugh, Elmo wants to turn things around in 2023, tweeting (yes, he has a Twitter) his New Year’s resolutions with “be kind to Rocco” at the top of his list.

February: The Wordles heard ‘round the world Okay, to be real, I don’t play Wordle. I occasionally might with friends or when I was bored at my old job, but I have never been a serious Wordle player (Wordler?). I wrote this article because I was like, “hm, Wordle is cool and relevant right now and this is kind of breaking news” and guess what? It worked — that article did really well, and now here I am a year later, bringing you another update about our (your) beloved word game.

As of spring 2022 Wordle was still free, but in the summer of 2022 its popularity dropped by 51% since it was purchased by The New York Times. In the fall, the NYT appointed a new editor, Tracy Bennett, to Wordle and changed the game’s rules to follow the NYT’s own answer list. Despite the changes made to Wordle and its dip in popularity, do I think it will release its chokehold on the goofy game lovers among us? Absolutely not. I know people that still play it every day, and I know people that live for the thrill of sharing how quickly they guessed the day’s word. And, just before the 2022 holiday season, players began breaking their Wordle streaks in a show of support for a walk-out staged by the Times Guild, a union that represents NYT employees. So Wordle may have lost some traction as a game in 2022, but who said it couldn’t be reborn as a political device?

March: “Elden Ring” arrives The cultural impact of “Elden Ring” was massive this year. It felt like people had waited for this game for a decade, even though it was only announced in 2019.

“Carrie Soto is Back” by Taylor Jenkins Reid

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Design by Leah Hoogterp.

Design by Grace Filbin.

Edited by Patti Varol and Joyce Nichols Lewis

DAILY FILM WRITERS

DAILY

The music beat’s picks for best albums of the year

DAILY MUSIC WRITERS

2022 was full of stellar albums across every genre and soundscape. Below find the Music Beat’s top albums of the year for every music taste.

—

Claire Sudol, Music Beat Editor, and Jack Moeser, Senior Arts Editor

Dragon New Warm Mountain I Believe in You by Big Thief

A double LP can often feel, commercially speaking, like a victory lap — the band has grown to the place where it can confidently release an hour and a half of music and not have some agent yelling at them. But Big Thief doesn’t do anything commercially, and Dragon New Warm Mountain I Believe In You does not feel like them resting on their laurels in the slightest. They’re growing, pushing themselves and reaching out across vast landscapes, physical and emotional. There’s a life lived across this album, or many lives, from grandmas to roses drying out, with phone calls, TV shows and apocalypses interspersed.

The band, consisting of lead songwriter Adrianne Lenker and creative partners Buck Meek, James Krivchenia and Max Oleartchik, taps into itself deeply on this album by tapping into a universality. By creating such a collection of songs, each with its own contained magic, Big Thief shows us the many universes each of us holds, and how these can come together.

The five-year hiatus that spanned the gap between Kendrick Lamar’s two most recent solo releases was filled with grief, joy and introspection. Few experienced these sensations more than Lamar himself. Having solidified himself as one of the greatest rappers of his generation with 2015’s To Pimp a Butterfly and 2017’s DAMN., Lamar opted for reclusion and welcomed two children with his partner, Whitney Alford. Five years later, he gifted the product of his hermitage to the world.

Whereas To Pimp a Butterfly scorns the condition of the Black man in America and DAMN. takes a deeper look at American culture, Lamar undertakes the most difficult subject of study yet for his fifth album, Mr. Morale & the Big Steppers: himself. The focus of much of the album is Lamar’s relationships with those close to him, from relatives to friends to significant others. Lamar then translates the example of these relationships to whatever conflict is being described to a much larger societal paradigm.

This formula is followed masterfully on several occasions.

“We Cry Together,” a rhythmic dramatization of a spat between a couple, serves as an indictment of Millennial relationships while simultaneously telling its own narrative. “Auntie Diaries” features Lamar detailing the story of his transgender uncle while attacking the normalization of homophobia and transphobia in the Black

community. Most heartbreakingly, “Mother I Sober” chronicles the legacy of child sexual abuse both in his family and in his community and closes with the motif of Lamar “breaking the cycle” of generational trauma that has plagued his bloodline. Few albums this year, if any, synthesize complex emotions into transmittable sound waves as elegantly as Lamar did this past May, and he continues to pad his resume even as he departs Top Dawg.

Household Name by Momma

Household Name is poised to make indie rock four-piece Momma precisely that. Fraught with ’90s rock sounds, Momma is akin to the likes of Veruca Salt and The Breeders — each track is filled to the brim with grungy electric guitars, gritty female vocals and piercing bass and drum lines. The front end of the album is jam-packed with hits: “Rip Off” opens with a growing hum of distortion, and percussion that sizzles like a rattlesnake, pacing itself at a slow groove while beefy guitar and airy voices move in a swirling tandem. The dynamic fluctuations of loud and quiet in both “Medicine” and “Rockstar” are almost Pixies-esque — totally in your face in one moment and reduced to a charged lull in another. This deft use of dynamics leaves listeners with bated breath in anticipation of the next line, next song, next album. It would be remiss not to mention “Tall Home” when talking about Household Name — the guitar line repeats itself endlessly in a dense tone that any guitarist could aspire

to recreate. My top pick from the album, “Tall Home” is an earworm that just won’t go away, digging its way deeper, nestling against your eardrums.

On Household Name, Momma references an imminent rise to stardom that was perhaps only achievable in the ’90s, but among the plethora of artists who find themselves in the pop-punk revival, Momma stands at the head of the pack. While pop-punk bravado can come off as a schtick in other bands, the angst-ridden sincerity and pleasantly insouciant attitude of Household Name make it so enticing.

My advice is to listen long and hard. There are surely stars to be found here.

Midnights by Taylor Swift Taylor Swift just can’t stop keeping us on our toes. Midnights, the record-breaking album of 2022, introduced the world to a new, more mature version of Swift, quickly becoming a fan favorite. The album sounds like 1989 grew up and became a blossoming masterpiece. Filled with introspective lyrics backed by Jack Antonoff and Aaron Dessner’s signature production style, Midnights is just as profound as it is catchy. Emotional tracks like “Labyrinth,” “Bigger Than the Whole Sky” and “Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve” are balanced by the bounciness of songs like “Karma” and “Bejeweled.” The main album, along with its bonus tracks, creates a storyline of Swift’s career and how she spends her restless nights thinking about all

The best TV shows of 2022

Every year, the television genre manages to surf some major highs and lows. Here on the TV beat, we’ve borne witness to our fair share of flops, but we’re choosing to focus on the positive. From Jennifer Coolidge running around a boat to Jenna Ortega becoming a TikTok trend, these eleven shows have made an indelible impact on the culture as we tuned in week after week, hungry for more. And so, without further ado, we pronounce the best TV shows of 2022.

— Annabel Curran, Senior Arts Editor, and Serena Irani, TV Beat Editor

“The White Lotus,” Season Two

Just when you thought television had played out rich people being miserable with shows like “Succession” and “Gossip Girl,” “The White Lotus” is here to introduce a new sub-genre: rich people being miserable on vacation. Season one introduced viewers to the show’s outlandish, yet believable, look into the perspectives of the rich vacationers and the hotel staff that tend to their needs. Season two was an escalation of the first season’s antics in scale of spectacle rather than in depth of messaging, which viewers can piece together from the very start. In the first episode this season, we learn that multiple bodies have been found at the hotel, rather than the single dead body we learn about at the start of season one.

The formula certainly works: The opening murders paint the usual network drama fare of extramarital affairs and complicated budding relationships with an added element of mystery, as viewers try to figure out which plotline(s) end in death. Despite this season’s heightened shitshow, we still learn many of

the same things — the privileged comments rich people make among themselves, the boundaries the rich ignore, the maneuvers workers make to advance their own interests and the systemic inequality that makes selfishness have varying consequences on others. With a stunning Sicilian backdrop and murder in the air, “The White Lotus” season two makes class commentary look sexy and intriguing — a conflicting sentiment, to be sure. You’ve just got to experience this one for yourself.

“Never Have I Ever,” Season Three

Everyone loves a strong protagonist. We love to root for people who are morally centered, confident and have it all together. But the one thing I love more than a strong character is a messy one. That’s where Devi Vishwakumar (Maitreyi Ramakrishnan, “Turning Red”) comes in. Devi is a teenager who is struggling to navigate through the grief of losing her father while at the same time facing the trials and tribulations of being in high school. The first two seasons of this show had my brother and me literally pleading with Devi to stop her self-sabotaging antics and cringe humor, but the third season had me — for the first time in my life — applauding Mindy Kaling (“The Mindy Project”).

“Never Have I Ever” excelled in many categories, most notably diversity. Ramakrishnan and her on-screen family, which includes the likes of Poorna Jagannathan (“The Night Of”) and Richa Moorjani (“Hot Mess Holiday”) made leaps and bounds for South Asian representation in TV. Devi wasn’t placed into previously established stereotypes of brown girls and instead created an entirely new

category for herself — insufferable but ultimately lovable. Season three of “Never Have I Ever” gets deep with exploration into relationship dynamics and vulnerability, and reconciling that with previous trauma. Devi and her friends still found themselves in embarrassingly cringey situations and still cracked a joke or two that had my head in my hands, but the show ultimately told a beautiful coming-of-age story.

“House of the Dragon” After the destructive fire that was the eighth season of “Game of Thrones” comes the simmering prequel series “House of the Dragon.” Fans of the original series will be happy to know that this show still has all of the components that defined “Game of Thrones” at its peak: incest, gore, convoluted family drama, dragons (obviously) and murder. However, “House of the Dragon” goes above and beyond. It is a phoenix rising from the ashes of its predecessor: smarter, more nuanced and impeccably designed. Best of all, it actually has women characters written by women.

Emma D’Arcy (“Foresight”) and Olivia Cooke (“Slow Horses”) are truly captivating as Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen and Queen Alicent Hightower, respectively. The central story follows their female friendship as it drastically changes based on the constraints of their patriarchal society and new experiences as mothers. As they slowly turn into enemies, the political waters become murky, making it difficult to decide which side is in the wrong. More contained than “Game of Thrones,” “House of the Dragon” is able to better spend time developing detailed and layered characters competing for the Iron Throne — and it works wonderfully. As someone who

was underwhelmed by “Game of Thrones,” “House of the Dragon” finally provided what I was longing for in the story of Westeros. Until the release of season two, you will find me talking about this show with everyone I know.

“Heartstopper”

Hi. (Hi).

It’s not often that I watch a show and want to watch it again. And again. And again. OK, I’ll say it; I’ve seen “Heartstopper” nine times (and counting).

Something about Netflix’s smash hit had me coming back for more, just to freak out over Nick (Kit Connor, “Rocketman”) and Charlie (Joe Locke, debut) falling in love for the millionth time. I mean, “I love liking you?” I think I’m justified.

With a diverse cast of complex characters, “Heartstopper” provides representation for people of different races, sexualities and genders without ever coming across as forced or stereotypical (looking at you, “Glee”). It also provides a well-written bisexual character in the form of a sweet 16-year-old boy instead of an attractive woman in her mid-20s, usually played by Megan Fox or Olivia Wilde. No disrespect, but let’s switch it up Hollywood. Please.

With stellar performances by Connor and Locke as the show’s leads and a surprise feature of Olivia Colman (“Fleabag”) as Nick’s mother, “Heartstopper” successfully combines the comedic elements of a teen rom-com with the heavier topics that often come with a coming-out storyline.

What the show does best, however, is provide a sense of comfort for people not often shown proper support from the media.

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the things that have happened to her over her nearly 20-year career. If you’re a casual fan of Swift, the album features plenty of fun, madefor-radio songs that will certainly stick in your head for the whole day. If you’re a Swiftie through and through, this album is a look into Swift’s mind, taking her relationship with her fans to a much deeper level.

The Forever Story by JID

After four long years since rapper JID’s last solo project DiCaprio 2, he made the wait worthwhile with The Forever Story, a boldly captivating release that showcases an undeniable amount of skill and personality.

There is never a dull moment on The Forever Story, and any listener would be able to tell every fine detail within each song was carefully thought through. Nearly every element that made DiCaprio 2 so good has been improved upon even more, from the kooky, eclectic production (like on the multiphased “Raydar” and the poignant and beautiful “Lauder Too”), to the sharp and witty bars that flow out of JID’s mouth with lightning speed and grace (the frenetic “Can’t Punk Me” is just one example, a hard-hitting track detailing JID’s humble beginnings in which he describes himself as a poor boy on the streets, fully-loaded, “ribs showin’,” doing whatever it’d take to survive). Additionally, “Surround Sound” contains arguably the most infectious chorus of any song in 2022, another testament to JID’s penmanship and creativity, enforcing it further when the beat of

the song switches to a braggadocious outro full of clever bars (“.40 on his side, boy, you Mike Alstott, he on the block violent”). If The Forever Story hasn’t already solidified JID’s place in the mainstream rap industry, then I don’t know what will.

Dawn FM by The Weeknd

When pop superstar Abel Tesfaye (aka The Weeknd) abruptly released Dawn FM early last year, it was difficult to see what his creative vision was. Whereas After Hours, his previous album, was a catchy and straightforward assemblage of enjoyable and tastefully retro-futuristic pop tracks, Dawn FM leans heavily into concept and takes risks, from Tesfaye’s off-putting British accent on “Gasoline” to several spoken-word interludes by actor Jim Carrey throughout the album.

While the idea of masquerading an album as a radio show has been executed countless times, Dawn FM balances its lighthearted nature with thought-provoking introspection in a way that no other radio-themed album ever has.

Furthermore, the album features an outstanding collection of diverse dance tracks, from “Sacrifice,” which features an energetic rock-guitar riff, to “Out of Time,” which takes direct influence from Japanese city pop. While Dawn FM is clearly a very personal statement by Tesfaye, it’s strengthened by its features from Tyler, the Creator and Lil Wayne, which add variety to an already unpredictable album.

The biggest trends of 2022

from their 19th-century coffin, I expect them to absolutely stick around for 2023.

Birk Bostons or Barefoot

As we move into 2023, it’s important to reflect on our experiences and discoveries during 2022, to continue the things we like and scrap the things we don’t. The most important reflections, of course, are those about fashion. It’s clear that 2022 was a year of fashion successes or, more controversially, “fashion fails.” Our style writers reflect on which trends are coming with us into the new year and which ones we’re leaving behind.

— CC Meade, Style Beat Editor and Kaya Ginsky, Senior Arts Editor

Corset Comeback 2022 or 1830? 2022 is The Year of the Corset Comeback. We’ve all heard the age-old aphorism “history repeats itself,” but I didn’t really believe it until this past year. With the exception of the pandemic, I hadn’t seen anything from history make an appearance in my modern life — until the return of the corset. Corsets have been featured this past year in everything from Urban Outfitters to frat outfits to Broadway musicals like “Six.” Corsets, which were first worn and became popular in 1830, were originally made of whalebone and steel and were used to provide shape to the torso.

Though corsets were used in the past as a wardrobe tool to alter both men’s and women’s body shapes, corsets are now a vital piece of a going-out fit. They can range in color and style, but they maintain somewhat of a similar shape, accentuating the waist and natural curves in people’s bodies.

Though 2022 was the year corsets made an official comeback, rising

The 18th-century German shoe brand, Birkenstock, came to America as a sandal in the ’60s, as hippies who preferred barefoot living sought untailored, comfortable ware. Since then, Birkenstocks grew beyond the hippie crowd to anyone looking for a durable, largely natural shoe.

As Seventeen article “6 VSCO Girl Shoes” (referencing the 2019 casual, preppy wave), says, twostrap Birkenstocks have a “Cali vibe.” This year, we switched coasts to the Boston clog. Bostons have more heartiness and cover for the East Coast, with a suede top and classic cork sole. With “ugly shoes” trending and chunky clogs showing up in every type of outfit, fashion ‘it girls’ Kaia Gerber and Kendall Jenner tipped social media into a Boston craze by merely wearing the shoe. This fall, the hot gender-neutral shoe sold out in most natural tones, especially the coveted taupe. The clogs became a commodity for online resellers, with some pairs selling for over $300. These shoes can be worn with any outfit: long skirts, ripped jeans, chunky knits — but they go best with pajamas. If you have not broken in the backless Bostons over many years, your foot slips out the back, leaving you shoeless as a real, dogs-out hippie.

Names, Images and Likenesses In June 2021, the NCAA instated a rule allowing “college athletes to benefit from name, image and likeness opportunities.”

Design by Grace Filbin.

Mr. Morale & the Big Steppers by Kendrick Lamar

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DAILY STYLE WRITERS

DAILY TV WRITERS

STATEMENT

Rethinking our digital future

EMILY BLUMBERG Statement Contributor

In the last 24 hours, my six friends and I collectively sent 374 texts in a group chat coming up on its five-year anniversary. And this was a slow day.

Calling Tinder matches “pen pals,” all-caps play-by-play reactions to the new “Matilda” movie, pictures of people we haven’t spoken to in years that seem to reappear all too often. Texts like “im wearing a headband” and “a grown man is sitting next to me on the plane watching lyle lyle crocodile.” Texts like “i feel like an empty shell of a person” received soon after “my mom j texted me that my plane is moving as if i’m not on it.”

There is nothing — like really, nothing — we haven’t discussed over text. Nasty situationship breakups, coming out of the closet and going back in, odd consistencies of period blood. Four and a half years of overcoming physical distance and digital hurdles have eradicated any and all attempts at censorship. It feels abominably rare to find a singular space in this world that holds absolutely zero judgment — and

maybe even more rare for that space to transcend the confines of tangibility.

Though the seven of us went to different high schools and subsequently shipped off to colleges divided by expensive plane rides apart, the group chat’s activity has somehow never wavered. What began as a way for us to stay connected in between high school weekends became an integral piece of understanding ourselves, each other and the independent worlds we’ve transversed. The permanent group chat name is “extensions of self” for good reason; it seems that no matter where we go physically, our bizarrely comforting codependence finds a way to make itself at home.

For as long as we’ve been friends, in-person interaction has been the exception, not the rule.

From our former lack of driver’s licenses to a global pandemic to our current collegiate lives, we’ve rarely been able to spend consistent time together over the years. But amid the gaping hole that occupies the space of our in-person relationships, a much more sentient realization exists: the affordances of modern technology have, against all odds, made each of our lives substantially

better. And it makes me think that maybe, just maybe, there is a world in which we are less than doomed to live in the emotionless digital dystopia we’re told is imminent. On the edge of a precipice In the last almost-three years, “unprecedented” has become a notoriously ineffective buzzword. If everything is “unprecedented,” the word loses its meaning entirely. Though a pandemic exactly like the one we experienced under the exact social and technological conditions of today’s world has never happened before, human nature has always been subject to the same problems and fears that dominated life in 2020: a lack of interpersonal connection, anxiety about humanity’s ability to resolve a life-threatening conflict and an overwhelming hunger to return to a mythical stability that was really never all that stable.

Writer and professor Jason Farman cites a few examples of the “unprecedented” trope in his essay “The Myth of the Disconnected Life.” Throughout the last 200 years, everything from kaleidoscopes to landline telephones to bicycles have been criticized for being the “beginning of the end” for human connection.

Farman’s decade-old piece itself

predates many of the products that dominate today’s existential technological worries.

Farman says even Plato was against writing, arguing that it would “disconnect us from the meaningful presence that comes with face-to-face interactions.”

And yet here we are.

In his seminal 1939 essay “Learning in Wartime,” writer C.S. Lewis reminds a World War II-ravaged society that the state of the world, though jarring and nerve-wracking, is not as “unprecedented” as they thought.

“The war creates no absolutely new situation: it simply aggravates the permanent human condition so that we can no longer ignore it,” he wrote. “Human life has always been lived on the edge of a precipice. Human culture has always had to exist under the shadow of something infinitely more important than itself.”

In a world chock-full of algorithms and devices that seem to be suspiciously morphing into a critically acclaimed Black Mirror episode, it’s easy to feel bogged down by the “unprecedented.” An ever-increasing reliance on modern technologies presents an easy avenue for looming fear. But Lewis presented a caveat from the

assumption that a major societal shift inherently qualifies as the jumping-off point for the end of the world. Lewis knew that humanity’s motivation to survive was much bigger than whatever an era’s “unprecedented” scenario may be.

There’s the artificial intelligence platform that could destroy literacy forever. And the GPS trackers that are kidnapping women and stealing cars. And, maybe most familiarly, social media platforms working so hard to keep our attention that losing yourself in a sea of smiley pictures of people you hate and ads for shoes you won’t buy is often an hourly occurrence.

There’s so much to be wary of. And more than that, there is just so much. Opening my phone can feel like allowing an army to stampede and invade my consciousness, giving them permission to the pieces of me worth preserving and putting them up for sale. Even when I’m trying to engage in something I believe is beyond the noise, I find yet another accredited news institution publishing an article that indiscreetly aims to unnecessarily scare me into confusion (and a subsequent subscription). Radically imagining a better future

How we interact with technology

depends on how we understand its place in our little, individual universes.

I asked everyone I thought would answer what their favorite part of modern technology was. My dad’s favorite is having an in-depth encyclopedia always at his fingertips. Friends answers varied from making memes of other friends to maintaining connections with people as geographical distances expand. When I ask myself what part of online modernity I most value, it’s the ability to visually remind myself of all the love and growth in my life. It’s the access to photos and messages and ideas that simultaneously ground and inspire me if I look at them right.

The technological affordances that permeate daily life depend on our own identities, needs and interests. In the oversaturated, fragmented media environment we inhabit, it is impossible — and probably inadvisable — to try to consume everything. But on the coattails of that truth is a substantial net positive: a digital world at your fingertips provides the autonomy to cultivate a technological experience that solely serves your best interest.

Trying for a world beyond language

DARRIN ZHOU Statement Columnist

When I was younger, I lived in Tiāntán, Běijīng. I was walking distance away from the Temple of Heaven — a sacred place — but my Eden was a rectangular arrangement of shrubs in the courtyard of my apartment, with a little hole that I would crawl through and into the area inside. That patch of bushes profoundly changed me! It was the only peace I’d ever found in my life. And now, a

more normal writer, recognizing the intrigue they’ve assembled, would softly guide the reader down into a satisfying conclusion, filling your mind with lavish sensory details about what that patch of bushes was like, but I’ll let you know that this is not really the story I want to tell.

I don’t want to write something to you that reads like a cliché college application essay — how I “lost my home and am struggling to fit in in America and look at all the challenges in my life” or whatever.

I want to suggest something beyond “perfect patchwork grass and notes

of magnolias in the air,” et cetera, and instead settle on something beyond memory. Whether or not I succeed is up to you.

A couple of years later I would immigrate to the United States. I got back from school one day when I was 8 years old, and my father told me we would be taking a short trip. Then he took me on the biggest airplane I’d ever seen. I looked out the window into the deep, primordial blue of the ocean and at that moment, I realized that suddenly, my country, my language and my mother were gone. For a period of six

years I couldn’t go back, and when I eventually did, I became a traitor: a serpentine, Germanic language flowing more beautifully through my mind than Mandarin could — but the noosphere, that realm of knowledge, knows what it wants. Chinese rests on the back of my tongue; I reach for it in my back pocket and to this day it’s uncorrupted, words coming out ringing true, pure bell-like tones.

I’m reminded of that irony whenever I speak English, looking into myself through the mirror. Thanks. Thanks. “I don’t know, I feel like whenever I hear someone

else make that -th sound, there’s like a nice, sibilant crispness, like, through it,” I say to a friend, both of us hunched in the corner of a room.

“Whenever I say it, it sounds soft and soggy. I don’t know.”

She lets out an embarrassed sigh.

“Okay, you’re going to kill me,” she started, “but you told me to correct you. It’s sibilant, not sybilant.”

“Oh, ok,” I sink, “thanks. Thanks. Thanks.”

“Xièxiè,” I say when I first revisit China at an intersection in Qiánmén, lying through my teeth. I come back five years later and people assume

that I never left. I’m invisible as I walk by the storefronts, no one perking

I’m a foreign spy in my homeland, waiting with bated breath until my limited vocabulary gives up the guise.

But, with a feeling I can’t shake, I still feel oddly comfortable here, more than I did maybe anywhere in the U.S. Among a torrent of black hair, I recede back into the natural rhythm of life, with a tonal language rocking me back and forth into submission, akin to a mother’s lullaby.

Design by Francie Ahrens

their ears at a misplaced phonetic.

So, what do you want to be? A reflection on career choice among college students

CHARLIE PAPPALARDO Statement Columnist

I think the very first thing I can remember wanting to do for a living was be a dinosaur. I was about 4 years old with a very limited conception of what “work” and “money” and “healthcare” were, but nevertheless I needed an answer to the ever-present question of “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I knew exactly what a dinosaur was, and that seemed — and still seems — pretty damn fun, so I picked that.

I knew that this act — picking something both familiar and exciting, and deciding that that is what you want to be — is a remarkably typical response for young children. But I wanted to see what that had looked like for my classmates. So, I walked around

the Diag, and interviewed anyone who’d talk to me, asking: “When you were very young, what did you want to be when you grew up?”

“I wanted to be a Jedi,” LSA sophomore Andrew Reno said when asked about his childhood aspirations. “Yeah, that was number one.”

Rob Rassey, University of Michigan assistant hockey coach, shared a similar sentiment while sitting comfortably on a blue couch in his office.

“I would say from the ages of like four to eight, I wanted to be a Ghostbuster,” Rassey told me, chuckling. “But then, I quickly realized that that wasn’t a great career path.”

Two others had wanted to be astronauts, one had wanted to play in the Premier League, another felt destined to be a garbage truck driver and one

had even rejected the prospect of work in general.

“My first thing was I wanted to retire,” Engineering graduate student Hessa Al-Thani said quietly. “I was four. I was starting school, and I wanted to retire.”

Alas, maturation works wonders for killing dreams.

I shifted slowly from “dinosaur” to “president” to “astronaut” to “hockey player” to “lawyer” and finally rested somewhere in the “I really don’t know” category around high school. Of course, that’s about the time when everyone else started to sound confident in their answers.

Tommy and Michael wanted to be doctors, Jada and Geetanjali wanted to be software engineers, and Kevin was already doing business. So with each passing year, my answer of “I don’t really know what I want to be yet,” became less and less satisfactory.

By the time we reach college, the expectation is that we’ve somewhat figured out an answer to that question. To an extent, I think it’s a fair expectation, because many of us pay thousands of dollars to be here.

But the pressure doesn’t make the question any easier to answer.

“What do you want to be when you grow up?” isn’t just a question of profession, it’s a question of identity. The question itself dictates that what you do is who you are, and it isn’t necessarily wrong to do so. Because truthfully, careers often define us in the eyes of others, whether we like it or not, and for many, that muddy mixture of identity, career, image and the confusion that surrounds it all causes stress and makes it exceptionally hard to answer the question.

In Armenia’s eyes: returning home as a foreigner

OLIVIA MOURADIAN Statement Columnist

Writer’s note: I intentionally wrote this piece as a celebration of Armenian identity — or at the very least, an exploration of it — as I rarely see Armenians or Armenia covered in American media without a strong attachment to the Genocide, the Second Nagorno-Karabakh War in 2020 or more generally to the hardships endured by the Armenian people. In American media, positive coverage of Armenia is rare, and I wanted this piece to speak to parts of being Armenian that are often left unheard. However, I’d like to acknowledge that connecting with Armenian culture in a full and sincere way cannot happen without also feeling the unhealed wounds of the Genocide, recognizing a degree of bitterness toward American media’s apathy to issues outside of the global West and carrying the continuous fear for our homeland’s future. As I write this, more than 120,000 ethnic Armenians in the Nagorno-Karabakh region have been left without essential supplies for five weeks due to Azerbaijan’s blockade of the Lachin Corridor. Being a part of the diaspora comes with a certain level of separation from these events and their fallout — which can be a privilege to exploit or a dissonance to mourn. As I am distinctly Armenian-American, my experiences in Armenia do not fully represent what it means to be Armenian — I do not have the bandwidth in this article nor the experience necessary to do so — but rather point to tensions and questions regarding my own Armenian identity.

Somewhere along an uneven road in Charentsavan, a small town about 30 minutes outside of Armenia’s capital city, Yerevan, I

walked with one of the students I had spent the last year working with, Ala, and Arsen, her 8-yearold nephew. Only having met me formally about 30 seconds prior, Arsen asked his aunt if I understood Armenian. She had to translate this for me and subsequently told Arsen I didn’t speak Armenian. He looked up at me, his gaze a reprimand that signaled an almost grandfatherly air of disapproval. He averted his large eyes and responded to his aunt in Armenian. Ala then told me that Arsen thought I should know Armenian, with that special sort of unrestricted, blunt honesty that only a child can deliver. Simultaneously amused and ashamed, I laughed and told Ala that he was right — I should know Armenian.

This sense of responsibility is rooted mostly in the fact that I’m half-Armenian. Because my dad did not speak the language with me throughout my childhood, and because I chose not to continue with Armenian school when I was younger, learning Armenian became a distant, lofty goal that I’ve never consistently stepped up to the plate for; while I’ve lamented both of these decisions before, I have seldom felt the consequences of them as strongly as I did during this first trip of mine to Armenia.

By the time I was walking with Ala and Arsen, I had already grown accustomed to not understanding most of what was being said around me. I had frequently been silenced by my own lack of understanding, and had no choice but to be okay with that — there’s no way to learn a language in two weeks. But, as an Armenian, I felt intense shame for not being able to communicate with these people in Armenian. It was surreal to finally

Going public with picky eating

ELIZABETH WOLF Statement Columnist

Content Warning: Mentions

Disordered Eating

It shocked my parents when their little girl, the kid who frowned at “Spongebob” boxed macaroni and cheese and lied about having a peanut allergy to avoid peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, tore apart a small filet of smoked fish, leaving behind only a plate of bones. Where did their picky eater go?

As a toddler and young child, I was picky in ways other children I knew were not. I flat-out refused ketchup, milk, blueberries, nuts and tomatoes. I’d eat watermelon when it was firm, raw carrots but never cooked, cucumbers with no skin and the heads of asparagus (which eventually joined the fray of untouchable foods). Pasta itself wasn’t an issue, but the heavy, acidic red sauce flooded over it made me feel sick. Cream cheese spread thinly on a bagel was the only form of cheese I’d accept.

My parents were a bit worried at first; many of my dislikes were favorites among other children, so why didn’t I go for them? My pediatrician assured them that

picky eating is a common behavior in in children. There isn’t one accepted definition of picky eating, nor is there one specific cause. Nonetheless, he was confident that over time, I would adopt more foods into my diet.

My parents accommodated my preferences. They would make me one dinner while they and my sister ate another, or section me a portion void of all my dislikes. They did not force me to eat anything I didn’t want, besides vegetables, which I tolerated. For school lunches, my mom would pack me the only lunch I accepted: ham roll-ups, strawberries and “Scooby Doo” fruit snacks. Every. Single. Day.

But outside the comfort of my home, I grew to be insecure about my eating habits. With my picky tendencies, I felt like an inconvenience to others. At school functions and birthday parties, I would sit there nibbling on plain chips while the other children gorged on pizza and spaghetti.

When I went over to other people’s houses, I’d often just eat the dry cereal my friends’ parents hesitantly placed in front of me. I squirmed under the scrutiny of others when they asked me what I wanted, what I didn’t want and why. It was

even more humiliating when some questions were directed over my head to my parents. I did not want to be the subject of conversation; I just wanted to be left alone.

As I grew older, my pediatrician was proved right. While I began to get tested for lactose intolerance, cutting out even more basic dairy products from my plate, my diet grew in meat, seafood and vegetables. My first love was steak: tender, medium rare, prime rib-eye prepared by my dad on the grill. It was the food of birthdays, holidays and special Sunday nights. Salmon stole my heart soon after, rivaling steak as my favorite.

Even more foods joined the roster: Seafood — a world beyond the soft, mushy foods I avoided growing up. Not only did I enjoy mussels, shrimp and bacon-wrapped scallops, but I loved the unexpected versatility of the food group. I finally escaped the plainness of buttered noodles by tossing clams or even little squids in the mix. I eventually discovered a similar flexibility with vegetables, learning to love them in stir fry, fajitas and even burgers.

I distinctly remember the happiness and excitement I felt when I first tried each of these foods. Like unlocking a new level of

power in a game, I had gained access to another world that was less dull than the one before it. Meals both at home and away were more interesting, and I felt emboldened to try more while still staying within the limits of my childhood preferences.

This is not to say that my learned habits were easy to break — as I transitioned into my teen years and into adulthood, my picky tendencies reared their heads in more dangerous ways.

As a child, I rooted myself in a complex that the way I ate was wrong and shameful. I grew up living in that thought. The scrutiny I faced made me distrustful of my own intuition, and I questioned whether I was able to make good decisions for myself.

Picky eating can correlate to disordered eating, which is defined as “a wide range of irregular eating behaviors that do not warrant a diagnosis of a specific eating disorder.” The distinction between the two can be difficult to pinpoint, but “most picky eating among children falls under mild to moderate disordered eating, and will resolve over time, at times with the support of an outpatient dietitian, therapist or pediatrician.”

While I did work with pediatricians and gastroenterologists, the term disordered eating never came up in my presence. Perhaps that was because the language was too sophisticated for a tween, but nonetheless I don’t fully engage with that label for fear of watering down its actual severity. Instead, I stick with the descriptor “picky eating” or, at worst, “my unhealthy relationship with food.”

In my case, my unhealthy relationship with food was the climax of years of body insecurity, depression and shame towards my food choices. If someone made even an innocent comment about my choice of food, I would shut down immediately. Even healthy foods were “bad” because of how much I liked them; I’d sneak snacks into my room, darting past my parents with the contents in my pockets. Food the noun and eating the verb developed as two different areas of opinion: I wanted to love eating the way I loved food. Tracking seemed like the perfect solution — I could lose weight, limit the “bad” intake and, the biggest lie of all: have a healthier body. Using a meal-tracking app, I carefully recorded each food and the times at which I ate. My supposed picky eating made it easy to justify my dangerous eating

make it to my family’s homeland, but this trip also came with a deep sense of inadequacy and regret.

Through an organization called EducationUSA, I had spent the past year working remotely with a cohort of about 25 Armenian high school students who were interested in applying to American universities. Throughout the year, I met with many of them in group sessions and individual meetings to brainstorm and edit their college admissions essays. Toward the end of the school year, the cohort hosted a graduation ceremony to celebrate their work, and I decided to make the trip to Armenia to join them. Of course, on top of this graduation ceremony, there was also a personal incentive for me to make a trip to a country I had only ever heard about from my family.

On my second night in Yerevan, as I came back to the guest house I was staying in after about eight hours of sightseeing with the students, I felt deflated and out of my element. The guilt I felt over not knowing Armenian was nothing new to me, but it was more potent than it had been in many years, and brought many of the insecurities I had tried to bury back to the surface. All at once, I was 11 years old at Camp Haiastan again — my face flushed because I didn’t know the Lord’s Prayer in Armenian; I was 19 and being asked why I pronounced my Armenian last name wrong; I was 12 or 14 or 15 or 18 or 21 years old being told that I don’t look Armenian. In the background of all these excursions and day trips, my inability to comprehend most of the interactions around me ate away at me and generated a new iteration of shame that I could not blame anyone for but myself.

habits. Of course I’ll get a salad with practically nothing on it, I don’t like any of the other toppings. I won’t eat much here, the menu isn’t for me.

This was a lie. I missed food. I would go to bed and wake up hungry, ready to sleep again to avoid the torture of the day. I knew it was wrong when I refused to say the actual amount I was consuming. My weight loss goals were too extreme, and when I saw no results, the reality of my situation only hurt more.

This moment was the peak of my unhealthy relationship with food, but for others, their relationship with food can spiral into a more serious situation. Disordered eating can spiral into an eating disorder, which is a “serious mental illness characterized by disturbances to thought, behaviors and attitudes towards food and eating.” Similar to the transition from picky eating to disordered eating, disordered eating to an eating disorder is not a clear path that looks the same in everyone. There are signs people can look for, such as the progression of dieting and amount of physical activity, which should always be diagnosed by a professional.

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I awoke to the sound of meowing and an itch in my eye. As I regained consciousness, I began to remember where I’d fallen asleep. I took stock of my friend’s apartment bedroom. The slight weight of a hangover bore down on my head as it started to ache, compounded by the fact I had definitely gotten too little sleep. I groggily pulled my phone off the charger to see the disappointing time of 9 a.m. displayed, realizing I had definitely stayed up too late with my friends on New Year’s Eve. My friend’s adorable cat stood at the foot of the bed, so I needed to make my escape. I learned last time I slept over through my right eye’s ballooning just how allergic I was to him — one of many things I wish I could change about myself. Ah, I thought to myself, it’s gonna be one of those days.

I stumbled over to the bathroom, not bothering to turn on the light and using my flashlight as needed. I didn’t want to face the light yet. After I washed my hands and face in the dark, I went to gather my things and cleaned up my mess from last night as quietly as I could around my other friends sleeping on the couch. While opening the door to leave, I shot my friend a quick text thanking him and explaining my escape from his allergenic cat. I paused and turned when I heard a crash in the bathroom. Was it just the cat again? Lowering my eyes, I saw my friend lying on the floor. He was struggling to do sit-ups.

I tried to resolve this confusion with a stage whisper.

“Hey man, you alright? I heard a noise, was that you? Also, uh, you doin’ a lil’ mornin’ workout?”

My friend rotated his head to lock eyes with me and answer while maintaining his exercise. “Yeah, just sit-ups, y’know? Might go for a run after this or something else.”

I forced a chuckle. “Starting the new year off right, huh?”

He stayed silent for a second, almost comically focused on holding my gaze while doing sit-ups. “Honestly? I just kind of stood in front of the mirror this morning for a second and really looked at myself. The person in there was the only thing that would really change my life for me, so I decided to let him — ‘New Year, new me’! You could try it if you want.”

I grunted in agreement, feeling some unidentifiable urge to leave. I felt bad he was still staring at me while working up a sweat, so I excused myself.

“Maybe I’ll do it at home. Thanks for the night, man.” He nodded wordlessly and turned his neck back to the task at hand, the form of his sit-ups improving with each rep.

I blinked and found myself already back at home. This happens sometimes, perhaps on one of those days when I don’t feel like experiencing anything: drives, walking, meals. It was already the afternoon somehow. I figured I must’ve killed the hours lying on the unusually uncomfortable carpet in our living room. I began to rise to my feet and gathered myself before I noticed my mother sitting next to me. She was deathly still. I was about to grab her and make sure she was alright before she let out a deep exhale.

My mother opened her eyes to look at me. They lit up at the sight of me, with that kind of joy I felt so often unworthy of. “Did you have a good New Year’s Eve, beta? Are you having a good morning?”

I sprawled my legs across the rug and told half the truth.

“Yeah, Mom. Did you?”

“We had a good time at the party, but of course we missed you. Do you know if you’ll have time to spend with us today?”

A yes almost dropped from my mouth, but something unexplainable was telling me to leave. My stomach twisted and dragged me from wanting to stay here, forcing me to change the subject. I wish I had it in me right now to be a better son. “You’re getting very skilled at meditating, aren’t you Mom?”

New Year, new me

She glances down at her folded legs. “Yes, I’ve been practicing a bit, especially in the morning. You know, I got up and looked at myself in the mirror today. Do you know what the Upanishads say about your reflection?”

I shook my head.

“They say the person you see in there is Brahman — the Supreme Truth. You meditate on that truth in the reflection and within yourself. I thought today I should really do that, like — you know how you kids say? ‘New Year, new me?’”

I gave her a slight nod, then decided on something. “I’m going out for a little bit,” I said to her, as I glanced up at the sunset already beginning. Making my way through the door while grabbing my jacket, I expected some kind of protest but my mother just remained where she was. I repeated what I said, and she gave the slightest nod, instead of the usual interrogation about when I’d be back and what I was doing. Maybe she really was a new her.

I blinked and found myself 20 minutes out from my house, cruising down the road. Some melancholy track I don’t remember queueing up played out into the soundscape of traffic. This was a ritual of mine, where I’d embark on a journey in this car just looking for anything to make me feel something. It was a ritual I’d been practicing for years. I imagined driving forever and ever, with some unexplainable thirst to escape my life as it stood. Driving to nowhere in particular, I tried to drink in the sights of my city. Slowly but steadily, the thought of leaving clouded my vision. City lights began to twinkle as I blinked back tears. Keeping one hand on the steering wheel and another wiping my eyes, I contended with the thought like I always do, knowing exactly where it was coming from: a desire to leave myself behind, a need to separate myself from my current incarnation. I pulled over into a park overlooking a river, stepped out and stared into the

world’s reflection in it. The truth was in there somewhere. I let my tears add to the flow of the river and felt myself come to terms with the desire to escape, and realized what I had to return home to do. A man then walked up to me. Not recognizing him at all, especially in the dark, my anxiety heightened for a second as I moved back toward my car.

“Hey, don’t be scared! I left behind my old life today, and you could too, y’know?”

This stopped my motion. I looked up at him approaching me. With nothing but the moonlight reflecting off the river, I could barely make out any details of his attire. As he got closer, it seemed much of the light was reflecting off him, almost blinding me.

“All you have to do,” he started, “is come with me.” The man grabbed me by the arm. He began to pull me away from my car. My anxiety peaking, I pulled away with that fight-orflight energy as hard as I could but the man’s grip stayed. More cars started to pull into the lot and more barely-discernible people stepped out toward me. That unexplainable feeling reared its head again and roared, prompting me to lift up my leg and kick at the man while pulling. I generated enough leverage to finally wrest my arm free. It finally escaped but not without cost, as pain surged through my arm. I realized something in his hand cut through my clothes into my flesh. As the mass of people took more steps toward me, I retreated into my car clutching my sleeve and tore out of the lot as fast as I could, trying to make it back home before any of them could follow me.

At first, the adrenaline pumping didn’t let the pain through. The drive home was a solid 20 minutes of anxious mirror-checking to see if there was any one car behind me. Surprisingly, I didn’t have anyone there. In fact, the middle of town that always seemed so busy was completely barren, even at this time of night. Streetlights flickered then

turned off completely, forcing me to turn on my brights. I was almost in the home stretch, relatively unscathed, save for my wounded arm. Just a few minutes through midtown and I’ll be home, I told myself, glancing back up at the rearview. I saw nothing but my eyes, touched by an unknown gentleness. The small homey buildings of midtown came into view, giving me the only lights on the road I’d seen for miles. As I drew closer, I could make out the same words lit up, on the theater marquee, on lit-up storefront signs, on the electric display at the bank: New Year, new you! Good reminder for home, I guess. My arm started to cry for attention as the adrenaline wound down.

Finally, I pulled into my driveway then threw myself out of my shoes and into my house. My house was unusually quiet, but I had to check on my arm first before investigating that. I just needed to see a mirror. Slamming the door shut to the bathroom, I rolled up my sleeve to see shards of glass embedded in my arm. I felt my face drop in shock, first at my arm and my reflection’s smile.

It was so warm. Such a gentle look stared back at me from behind the glass and part of it made the pain fall away. I managed to vocalize my disbelief: “Sorry, what the fuck?”

My reflection tilted his head. “You really need to start listening more to your mother.” He rested his hand slowly against the glass. Something in me pulled my hand to meet his. I tried again for answers.

“Something about the truth?” His smile grew wider, the fluorescent light reflected inside the image seemingly bouncing off his shimmering teeth.

“No cat allergies. A better son. Being someone else entirely. That’s what you wanted, right? We are the sum of everything you could aspire for and improve yourself toward. The collected potential that you wish for every time you stare unto us, yet find yourselves unable to achieve. We’ve been

watching all this time.” The reflection lifted his hand from the glass and reared it back.

“And we have had enough.”

A shatter rang out and a hand clasped around my throat. I traced the length of the arm to find it extending from a hole in the mirror. Something else pulled me in too — a vacuum, I realize, coming from the other side of the mirror. It meant there was nothing on the other side but this being.

“Don’t fight it like you did earlier. You’re one of the last to be reinvented. Becoming better is not always a pleasant process — sometimes it is a violent, bloody thing that you have to accept will hurt.” Saying this, my hand was slowly pulled into the opening, the jagged glass leaving new cuts in my skin. Another crash and another hand came out from the mirror. This time, it gently cradled my face. The reflection’s face pressed against the glass and I held my head as far away as I could from the mirror, trying desperately to think of anything to stop this. All I could do was cry out wordlessly, begging for someone in my family to save me but then realizing what had already happened. The hand around my face found its way to the back of my head and the last thing I saw was the mirror rushing toward me.

I blinked and found myself on the other side of the glass. I blinked again. Then again, trying to figure out what kind of twisted dream this was. I watched the bathroom door open to see myself step in with a broom and dustpan. My hands moved before my mind as I pounded against the mirror to no response. I could hear the rest of my family — or no, whatever truths they were replaced by — chuckling happily as I talked to them beyond the glass. All I could do was sit back and watch, meditating on the truths I saw beyond the mirror. I watched him finish sweeping and prepare to return to the rest of the family.

“Don’t worry,” he said. “We’ll all be good to each other. New year, new us.”

SAARTHAK JOHRI MiC Columnist

Aditi Khare/MiC

Dear Lindsey: balancing burnout

LINDSEY ZOUSMER

Irealize how burnt out I feel from all of my activities and school work. I’m finding it hard to remember my schedule, what I did last week, what I ate yesterday, and I have to look at my calendar to remember everything. It is not a good feeling. I can’t truly enjoy my activities and daily life anymore without feeling dread. What is your advice?

-L

Dear L, I completely understand where you are coming from. Burnout is such a normal feeling and is so real! Regardless of your major and path, college is undoubtedly stressful! Psychological stress and burnout are evidently prevalent in first-year college students, as well as the greater population. Nearly everyone experiences dread throughout their own journey, whether or not there is a specific reason or cause for it. I recommend that you switch up your routine. Think about it — what is boring you? What are small things you can change? What is causing this feeling? Is it exhaustion, stress from school, an emotionally draining relationship? All of these factors are either able to be fixed or coped with, so take a step back and think on them. Are you able to take some space from the person that is causing you extra worry? Or maybe you’re feeling discouraged about being social and seeing friends — that’s fine, too! Take a self care day and watch your favorite YouTube channel and eat Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, and then make lunch plans with a trustworthy, comforting friend for next weekend.

After reaching study goals, set rewards for yourself. Maybe you hate one of your classes and

it is not an option to drop, but on the way home every day you can distract yourself by calling a loved one and laughing with them. Additionally, you can try and make small changes in your routine. Whether it is as simple as a new coffee order, or as drastic as planning a road trip or switching your current lease, something in your schedule should become unfamiliar and different. When I am in a rut, I like to connect with old friends and try new workout classes, indulge in a new book or a TV show and find a new music artist to love. Sometimes life is disappointing for no particular reason, but finding little things to look forward to on a dayto-day basis will break down those slumps and encourage you to keep pushing. Start journaling to reflect on each day and take a few moments each morning to think about what you are grateful for, then emphasize those sources of happiness as often as possible: Prioritize the little things that make you smile, make an extra effort towards meaningful relationships, try new things and regularly reflect on the positive aspects of your daily life. Take your life one day at a time — I promise there’s light at the end of the tunnel!

*

I’m not sure if this is something you can provide advice on, but I would like to get a different perspective outside of just asking my friends. Should I even bother coming out to my parents? I’ve been out to my friends/classmates as queer for several years now and I’m very lucky to be surrounded by a wonderful and supportive friend group. But, for years now, I have tossed around the idea of coming out to my parents and my friends have all encouraged me to come out to them, but right now, I don’t know if it’s even necessary? Like, in theory, would it be nice to tell them so I

don’t have to feel like I’m holding something back from them? Yes, it would be lovely. I would love for my mom to stop pointing out every boy at the store to me as if I am going to date them. But at the same time, my parents don’t ever ask me about dating or crushes, and I don’t have the kind of relationship with them where I could honestly ever bring that stuff up with them, if that makes sense. I’ve definitely dropped many hints to them that I’m not straight (I’ve purchased way too many LGBTQ+ books on our Amazon account and I have a rainbow flag sticker on my computer that they’ve definitely seen). Still, they’ve never brought it up to me, so it feels like they are either completely clueless or they don’t want to bring it up to me because they wouldn’t approve. We have a few friends and family who belong to the LGBTQ+ community and they seem to be fine with them, but I know sometimes people take it more personally when their own children come out. So that’s basically the whole situation at hand. There’s definitely been times in the car with them where I have wanted to blurt it out or times where I have just wanted to send them an email explaining everything, but I never do. Sorry for this long message and I totally understand if you don’t want to give me advice on this! I’m just happy that I can share this with someone who doesn’t know me personally, it’s nice. Thanks in advance!

-G

Dear G, First of all, I commend you for your bravery for submitting your situation to me and our readers. I’m sure that there are so many others in your position, and I can only imagine how difficult it is to feel nervous about revealing a portion of your identity to your family. I do not have any personal experience with this

decision, but I am fully in support of you and whatever you decide to do. It seems as though you are truly weighing all of your options as best as you can, and you acknowledge the pros and cons to each and every scenario. The matter of utmost importance is how you feel and whichever outcome you think will benefit you the most — the choice that is best for you is exactly the one you should choose. I encourage you to turn to other members of the LGTBQ+ community; the University provides and recommends local helpful and educational resources that are ideal for fostering a community and establishing a support system. I recommend Redbook’s advice from LGTBQ+ influencers, as well as The Trevor Project: The Coming out Handbook to learn about personal experiences such as yours and gain some advice from more intellectual and experienced individuals who have likely had similar conflicts.

My best advice is to consider this part of your identity like any other when/if you come out to your parents. You’re queer just like your hair may be brown, just like you may have three piercings on your left ear or that you may be 5’4”. You don’t owe them any sort of explanation or formal confession similar to an epiphany. If it makes you more comfortable to casually mention it rather than having a deep conversation, that is perfectly acceptable. The movie “Love Simon” challenged society to think about why “coming out” is necessary for people who are not heterosexual and cisgender, but not necessary for those that are. I think that with this lesson we can break down the traditional methods of “coming out.” Next time you sign a family email, you can put your pronouns in your signature, or if you choose to introduce a future partner to your family, you can let them know that way. “Coming out” does not necessarily have to be a sit-down conversation, and I encourage you to brainstorm alternative ideas to let your parents know and to sense which one makes you the most comfortable and content.

All things said, you should hold so much pride no matter what decision you make, in the wise words of Harvey Milk, “All young people, regardless of sexual orientation or identity, deserve a safe and supportive environment in which to achieve their full potential.” Family is composed of those who choose to support you no matter what, and regardless of this decision it seems as though you have found people who truly accept and support you for who you are. I wish you the best of luck and remember, this is just another beautiful, unique and special part of you — if they get the honor of knowing it, they should treat it like one!

In defense of bad decisions

Ialways feel a sense of nostalgia for the winter months. Many of my best memories were made under a gray sky and on snow covered ground. One cold February during my junior year of high school, I remember roaming around a state park with friends and complaining about the pandemic. With the high caseload in our area, we had to find ways to kill time outdoors. So, freezing our asses off, we traversed an icy lake and stopped on a small island. Immediately, I noticed an empty Fireball shooter by my feet and got an idea.

After months of drinking in backyards and neighborhood parks, looking to avoid being yelled at by a parent or charged with a misdemeanor, my friends and I were seeking a safer option. I saw the small bottle of cinnamon whiskey and came to the nonsensical conclusion that because police don’t have any way of crossing water (a false assumption, though one I made nonetheless), the most logical place to drink was on an island. So we built a boat.

One quick look on Google reveals a plethora of literature explaining the negative consequences of poor decisions and what leads people to make them. Far less research, however, exists to explain the benefits of such decisions. Clinical Psychologist Ron Breazeale writes in Psychology Today that “in general, bad choices have to do with acting out of emotion and not out of reason. Unfortunately, strong emotions can cloud our thinking and move us to do things that are not smart.”

But acting “not smart” is one of the joys of life. It’s necessary and fun to be a dumbass sometimes. Strong emotions sit at the center of all meaningful decision making,

and I’d argue that sometimes a bad decision is the healthiest way to cope with them. Often, the very guardrails meant to keep us from making the wrong choices are creating the emotions.

We’ve all heard other adults reminisce and tell stories about their own stupid behavior in their youth. And yet, as parents, many of them go on to track their children’s phones and demand hourly text updates. By trying to shield their kids from harm, they are actually preventing them from making valuable mistakes. For all people, but especially young adults, mistakes are necessary to learn about ourselves and our place in the world. An overprotective approach steals a fundamental part of early life from children. It’s no surprise kids act out to get it back — in the era of bubble wrap and smooth edges, sometimes people long for the thorns.

For older high schoolers and college students, the guardrails are different but equally oppressive. We worry less about parents or teachers chastising us and more about harder classes, tuition and relationships. We become responsible for ourselves and want an escape from it sometimes.

When my friends and I built our boat, we were feeling down about school, the constant effort to avoid COVID-19 and the burden of being stuck inside with the same people every day. A bad choice — attempting to drink on an island after a misconception about the reach of law enforcement — was our only escape, the only thing to keep us going.

Now, as a freshman in college, bad choices are keeping me going as I adjust to campus life. Staying up too late on Wednesday to meet a deadline, then drinking too much on Thursday to burn off steam has become my weekly routine.

JACK BRADY Opinion Columnist

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SHANNON STOCKING AND KATE WEILAND Editor in Chiefs

QUIN ZAPOLI AND JULIAN BARNARD Editorial Page Editors

EDITORIAL BOARD MEMBERS

JULIA VERKLAN MALONEY AND ZOE STORER Managing Editors

Introducing Stirring the Pot with Giselle: Let’s get weird

GISELLE MILLS Advice Columnist

Sometimes, life can feel a little too settled, and too many good things can become a boring thing. A bad grade, stepping in some gum or even plucking your eyebrows a little too thin can completely ruin an otherwise good week when you have nothing else going on. But when you and your roommate are in an all-out turf war or you just impulsively kissed your best friend, those small inconveniences can be brushed off. Creating drama by and for yourself provides the gift of scale — the little stuff becomes inconsequential.

The social fabric wears thin like cheap polyester: A lesson from Shein

ANNA TRUPIANO Opinion Columnist

With the start of a new year comes many fond memories as well as infinite chances to look back on the year just passed.

From Spotify Wrapped to massive annual datasets, there is always something new to learn. As part of our look back on the past year, Shein was confirmed as the most Googled fashion brand of 2022, thereby making it the most popular fashion brand of the year.

For anyone unfamiliar, Shein is a $100 billion fast fashion brand that has faced almost every type of criticism a company could face, and for good reason. It is relatively well known that Shein overworks and underpays its employees; many are reportedly working 18 hours per day and making the equivalent of about $556 per month in yuan currency.

Furthermore, somewhere between 700 and 1,000 new items are listed on Shein’s website daily, according to CEO Molly Miao. With our modern society’s tendency toward fast rotation of clothing, many articles end up being dumped in landfills before they have a chance to sell, thus contributing to the 101 million tons of clothing in landfills every year, which is an unfathomable amount.

So, how does Shein maintain its popularity considering the controversy that surrounds it? Their prices are ridiculously cheap — usually lower-cost and typically more trendy than secondhand clothing. Shein also uses Artificial Intelligence to test for customer interest prior to executing wide-scale production, which allows them to funnel new and trendy pieces into the market more quickly than other brands, among other strategies to reel consumers in.

Now, I could go on and present some ways to counteract the effects of Shein on the clothing industry and the environment, but that has been done before. People have already offered somewhat viable cures to the disease of fast fashion, such as investing in sustainable fashion so that, with

time, prices decrease (in the same manner that organic food has become increasingly affordable over time). Likewise, we can turn toward rental fashion sites to decrease consumption while still appealing to modern society’s desire for a fast rotating wardrobe.

Moreover, tangible legislative measures such as the FABRIC Act in the Senate and the Fashion Act and the Fashion Workers Act in New York have been introduced to the respective legislative bodies. If passed, these laws would assist in circumventing the issue of fast fashion by improving workers’ and models’ rights, as well as by increasing brand transparency with respect to environmental and social impacts.

This is not to say that these measures and solutions have cured us of the blight of companies like Shein, but more so that these solutions have been entertained and written about time and time again. However, through the popularity of companies like Shein something deeper is revealed about our society: fast fashion reflects a lost generation.

We live in a postmodern world, an intellectual movement classified by the rejection of certainty and truth in our universe. The basis of postmodernism essentially resists everything modernism asserts about rationality and reason. In fact, every art and intellectual movement rises from the ashes of what came before, as a response to prior opinions that are no longer sufficient in establishing an understanding of the world. Thus, there exists an inherently destructive sense to any newer opinions that lead artists and intellectuals, since much of their purpose is to discredit what came before.

The relation of the ebbs and flows of intellectual movements to Shein and fast fashion might not seem immediately evident, but postmodernism reflects a society that no longer has an identity — it defines itself by resisting what came before without a new idea on which to ground the present. As such, Shein and fast fashion are a perfect reflection of the reality of our current intellectual world.

Postmodernism’s lack of

societal definition has allowed for the powers of capitalism to stand in as a source of meaning, resulting in a lack of definitive nature that can be seen in even the clothing that we buy. Take, for example, the aforementioned fastpaced rotation of items on Shein’s website, showcasing a lack of permanence and a constant need for the “next best thing.”

Or, we can turn to the broader trends of consumerism. Over the past 40 years, the amount of clothing consumed has increased by five times while the amount of clothing thrown away has simultaneously doubled. In summary, we are consuming much more than we did in the past, as well as throwing away more of that consumption, reiterating the lack of permanence that postmodernism exhibits.

This constant influx and outflux of clothing demonstrates a society that is incapable of finding meaning. Those in our generation seem to be lost in a world of constant rotation. My parents, on the other hand, have items in their closets that are decades old because they were able to reap satisfaction from their time.

Fast fashion is a product of these corrosive mentalities that have wedged their way into our minds and driven our daily behaviors. It gives us an outlet to exercise the uncertainty that postmodernism is founded upon. Of course, the issue of fast fashion can be centered around themes of sustainability and ethics, but there is a side of this debate that is being ignored. An uncomfortable truth that the prominence of companies such as Shein reveals about the world: We are a generation without meaning or definition, and there is something terrifying about that.

We grasp the thousands of new products introduced every day like a lifeline, as if this particular set of clothes will somehow mean something more than the one before. And in this search for meaning, people will keep buying from Shein as long as our world fails to provide it, because when it comes down to it, the search for meaning is the root of everything people do.

Drama keeps us alive. Gossip brings us closer. Good advice can make a bad situation good again. But “bad” advice? Bad advice is exciting, obnoxious and you can’t help but watch and see what will happen. That is not to say that my intentions are to ruin your life

— I just think we could all take more risks. How many advice columns represent that voice in your head, the one that says to do the right thing and to handle a sticky situation with absolute grace, dignity and courageous vulnerability? Nearly all of them. And how many advice columns give voice to the little devil on your shoulder? Zero. Sometimes a situation calls for a bit of pettiness, a morally gray choice or a straight-up meltdown.

And remember, I am neither your therapist nor your mother. I am just some person on the internet hoping to make a bad situation at least a little funny for both you and me. I will never claim that my advice is helpful in the long run, but by taking it you may end up looking really cool to your future self, your parents’ friends from college, your nieces and nephews, and your barber. Maybe every once in a while I’ll take it easy on you. I’ll put on my best listening

ears and gracefully transcribe my response in 16-point-size, gorgeous calligraphy and have someone else type it — those will be the nice ones, when being impulsive and silly just doesn’t quite fit the situation.

I may be blunt and tell you something you didn’t want to hear, because sometimes a recommendation for a good movie or a local hot yoga studio is the only answer to your woes that I can provide.

So let’s “goss” (imagine me lying across your bed with a little handheld mirror, putting on the red lipstick that I found in your mom’s bathroom cabinet) and get into it. Tell me your most ridiculous, embarrassing and toughest problems, and I’ll try to help you find some fun in it or just tell it to you straight. You can only make truly stupid decisions and blame them on your youth for a little bit longer. I would love the chance to make your life a little more interesting.

Artificial Intelligence: the silent perpetrator of social inequality

TATE MOYER Opinion Columnist

Imagine you are applying for a job. After filling out the necessary information on the company’s website, attaching your resume and writing a cover letter, you click “submit” and then wait to hear back. A few weeks later, you check your inbox to find an automated email response informing you that, after a thorough review of your application, you have not been selected for the position. Questions begin to flash through your head: What was wrong with my application? Was my cover letter the problem? Was I simply unqualified? However, there’s a strong likelihood that the company’s decision was not based on any of these factors. Rather, as is the case with as many as 75% of businesses, the decision to reject your application was most likely made by an algorithm.

As a growing number of businesses are seeking out ways to streamline hiring and reduce labor costs, Artificial Intelligence has taken the corporate world by storm. However, these benefits do not come without repercussions — the use of AI in recruitment processes is slowly unfolding as a silent perpetrator of social inequality.

According to the World Economic Forum, the automation of hiring procedures is “stopping an estimated 27 million people from finding full-time work.”

The candidates that are primarily filtered out by AI softwares are largely composed of demographically-marginalized individuals. A study by Harvard Business School identified previously incarcerated persons, veterans, refugees, immigrants and those with mental or physical disabilities as “hidden workers” who lose out on job opportunities in part because they are often

unjustly screened out by hiring algorithms. Despite the fact that an astonishing 88% of these individuals were shown to be fully qualified for the position, they were nonetheless disqualified for not matching specific criteria.

You may find yourself wondering how all of this is possible. The idea that automated and allegedly unbiased machines are replicating human prejudices seems counterintuitive. However, the ultimate problem does not necessarily lie in the machines themselves, but rather within the information and datasets upon which they are built.

Data is rarely neutral — instead, it is often tarnished by historical instances of human injustice and partiality that plague information archives. As emphasized in an article by Brookings Press, “Algorithms, by their nature, do not question the human decisions underlying a dataset.” Rather, they are based on trends of reproduction that can cause them to replicate “the very sorts of human biases they are intended to replace.” The resulting algorithmic code has the potential to accept or reject a candidate’s resume based solely on the presence (or absence) of specific keywords.

For instance, Amazon came under fire back in 2018 after its hiring algorithm was shown to disproportionately favor male candidates over female ones. Coded to replicate hiring patterns in the company over the previous 10 years, which had been overwhelmingly male, the algorithm was found to penalize any resumes that contained keywords such as “women’s.”

Unable to mitigate these biases, Amazon was forced to scrap the project completely and temporarily revert to more traditional hiring methods.

This bias has been found to impact not only the screening phases of the recruitment process

but also the initial “sourcing” phase. During the sourcing phase, companies will attempt to attract certain candidates to the position through methods such as advertisements and online job postings. The specific websites and feeds selected to display these advertisements are often based on algorithmic predictions — specifically, ones that calculate a candidate’s likelihood of succeeding in the position based on their background information.

In a study conducted by the Harvard Business Review, these technologies were found to be extremely biased, often targeting ads based on prejudiced and stereotypical information. The study found that cashier and secretary positions were targeted toward an audience that was disproportionately female (85%, to be exact) and taxi companies targeted audiences that were 75% Black. The study points out that “this is a quintessential case of an algorithm reproducing bias from the real world, without human intervention.”

As is demonstrated in both of these instances, if left unchecked, the use of these algorithms threatens to exacerbate historical trends of discriminatory hiring practices in the United States. Fortunately, many efforts aimed at mitigating these issues have already begun to emerge.

For instance, various pieces of legislation, such as a recent bill passed in New York City, seek to remedy these issues by requiring companies to conduct annual bias audits of any AI softwares and technologies used. Mainstream media is also starting to call attention to the issue, as demonstrated by the recent release of the Netflix documentary “Coded Bias,” which exposes the discriminatory practices often contained in artificial intelligence.

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Michigan women’s track and field posts a strong showing at the Michigan Invitational

Writer

Although the Michigan Invitational was a non-scoring performance, Michigan displayed both dominance and need for improvement. The track athletes were successful but the Wolverines faltered in their field events.

The track athletes took first in seven of the nine events, while the field events earned first in just one of its six events.

Although the scoring of the invitational wasn’t cumulative, Michigan’s performance proved that it has the potential to be dangerous in upcoming events. While the field event results are not perfect, the early success indicates a high ceiling, given that this is only their second event of the season.

“I think the women’s team had a great day today,” fifth year distance runner Samantha Saenz said. “There was a lot of personal bests.”

Saenz ran one of those personal bests, finishing first in the mile run at 4:46.39. She had to earn that victory as the second place finisher, Toledo’s Lou Trois, clocked in just 52 milliseconds behind her. Saenz’s close win accounted for one of two Michigan victories decided by milliseconds. Sprinter Ziyah Holman won the 600 meter run in 1:31.22, edging out unattached

runner Nikki Stephens by 34 milliseconds.

“The time wasn’t what I was expecting, to be frank,” Holman said. “I really appreciate the win.”

These close finishes bode well for the Wolverines as they prepare for competitive meets later in the season. The non-scoring meet gives Michigan chances to compete and pulling out neckand-neck victories is great experience early in the season.

Although most of the track events resulted in dominant performances, Michigan came up short in the 60 meter run.

The event was still close, senior sprinter Hannah Hearn took second running a 7.70. However, she lost to Michigan State sprinter Amani Nuels who finished at 7.59.

Despite the strong track performances, the Wolverines left themselves lots of room for improvement in the field events.

Its singular victory in the field events came from junior Corinne Jemison in the shot put where she threw 15.29 meters. Junior Mia Manson saw some success, tying for first in the pole vault, vaulting 3.96 meters. Beyond these two performances, however, the field events left a lot to be desired.

While the near perfection that the running athletes exhibited can’t always be expected, placing higher in the field events is

essential moving forward.

Michigan did not place above fourth in any of the other four events. Senior Theresa Mayanja finished ninth in the long jump, freshman Gabi Newman placed sixth in the high jump, freshman Emma Jungeberg was seventh in the weight throw, and junior Morgan Flynn finished fourth in the pole vault.

The Wolverines’ finishes on Saturday were not optimal, but it leaves them hope for performances ahead. In the Wolverine Invitational on January 7th, Michigan had a top three finish in five out of the six field events. It had multiple athletes compete at that event that did not compete in the Michigan Invitational, showing that when the Wolverines have their strongest athletes, they find more success.

The questions about Michigan’s true strength in the field events will soon be answered as they continue into the season, but the Michigan Invitational showed that the field athletes have to pull their weight alongside the already strong runner’s performances.

“We’re getting ready for later in the season,” Michigan director of track and field Kevin Sullivan said. “This is all in preparation for those late season meets.”

The Michigan Invitational is a stepping stone for the team as the season progresses — now, the question is whether Michigan can build on its performances.

Jack Medley rides momentum in 125pound upset victory

JOSHUA BROWN Daily Sports Writer

The No. 3 Michigan wrestling team entered Sunday’s dual at Cliff Keen Arena against No. 14 Wisconsin expecting to easily handle its competition in its conference home opener. But few outside 125-pound wrestler Jack Medley expected the Wolverines to start out so strong.

The graduate wrestler entered Sunday’s match looking for his fourth straight dual win after his 6-3 decision over Michigan State’s No. 25 Tristan Lujan Friday night.

But Sunday’s dual as an underdog against No. 5 Eric Barnett posed a stiffer challenge.

“Coming into the match, I was pretty relaxed,” Medley said.

“Another opponent, another guy. (I) had a good match Friday night. I feel like I’m getting better every match. I don’t look at the rankings or anything like that. I just focus on myself.”

Medley, now in his sixth season, was tasked with monumental shoes to fill: Replacing last season’s NCAA 125-pound champion Nick Suriano. As a result, Medley only appeared in 10 duals last season and had to wait in the wings behind his championship-winning teammate.

As Medley waited his turn, he continued to be a team player throughout his long journey at Michigan.

Now in the spotlight, Medley began the first period down 2-0 after an early takedown by Barnett,

but he scored a key reversal to knot the score and turn the tides before the end of the period.

“After that reversal at the end of the first period, I felt the momentum swing in my direction,” Medley said.

And that momentum was palpable inside Cliff Keen Arena, with both the crowd and team buzzing for Medley’s early effort against such a talented opponent.

“You could see about halfway through that match momentum was shifting,” Michigan coach Sean Bormet said. “Jack’s really good in all three positions, so when he got that reversal I could see the momentum shifting.”

But the turning of the tides did not fully manifest itself in the scoreline until the third period. He earned a reversal, which led to a riveting four-point near fall after putting Barnett on his back as well as two takedowns in the period, powering him to a 12-6 decision.

“He stayed in a lot of tough positions, wrestled through everything, and he made the Wisconsin kid continue to wrestle the entire match,” Bormet said. “… He did a great job staying dominant in that third period, and he’s just continuing to gain confidence and continue to build his wrestling attacks back up.”

Sunday’s win, in multiple ways, serves as a culmination of the work ethic and fortitude Medley has displayed over his six seasons for Michigan.

Despite his individual accolades such finishing fourth in the Big

Ten at 125-pounds in the 201920 season and qualifying for the NCAA Tournament before it was canceled due to Covid-19, his team-first attitude stood out the most.

“Jack Medley’s a guy that’s like a backbone to a team,” Bormet said. “Just incredible work ethic, incredible consistency, incredible commitment to the team: team first. And he’s been that way from the time he got here as a freshman. So he’s so well-respected by the entire team, doesn’t matter what grade, so well respected.”

Having the respect and support of one’s teammates can go a long way. Taking that enthusiasm into meaningful results that set the tone for a team goes even further.

This year, relishing his valuable role on the team, Medley is enjoying defining moments like his upset against Barnett.

“I’m just staying present in the moment, not really focusing on it being my last year,” Medley said. “Just being present and being grateful for every time I can represent the University of Michigan and step on that mat.”

The season is still relatively young, and Medley and the Wolverines realize that all of their goals still in front of them. Heading to State College on Friday to battle No. 1 Penn State, they’ll hope to keep their undefeated record intact.

And for Medley, it will provide another chance to prove himself on a big stage.

Michigan goes undefeated in the ASU Cross Conference Challenge

With 45 seconds left on the clock in overtime, sophomore attacker Ashley O’Neil had a chance to give the No. 7 Michigan water polo team the lead in the last game of the ASU Cross Conference Challenge. Her shot from 10 meters out found the back of the net, clinching an 11-10 win over No. 10 Arizona State.

The seventh-ranked Wolverines (4-0 overall) opened their season in the challenge with a new head coach, but that didn’t hinder Michigan’s performance as it beat all four teams it faced.

Through their first three games, the Wolverines did as expected, beating three unranked opponents by a wide margin before facing greater adversity in their win against the Sun Devils (3-1 overall).

“I think its resilience… every single quarter they got better and better,” Michigan coach Cassie Churnside said. “Our mindset was definitely to stick to our game plan and trust the process.”

That development was evident in the first two days of the three-day event as the Wolverines dominated on both offense and defense.

In Michigan’s first game against Biola (0-3), back-to-back goals by graduate center Erin Neustrom and junior attacker Lola Ciruli less than a minute into the game gave the Wolverines

an early lead. While the offense continued to generate open shots, Michigan’s suffocating defense forced turnovers and steals, leading to a 14-0 shutout.

On Saturday, the Wolverines faced California Baptist (2-2) for their first matchup of the day and this game was no different. With three of its players scoring a hat trick, the offense — led by Ciruli and junior attacker Kata Utassy — gave Michigan a commanding 16-5 win over the Lancers.

“Kata Utassy is one of the best all-around players on our team,” Churnside said. “She’s going to be critical to us and our success this season.”

Later that day, Utassy followed up her first hat trick of the season with another complete performance, racking up two steals and leading the team with five goals in Wolverine’s 18-6 win against Azusa Pacific (0-3).

Despite its undefeated start, the hardest challenge still lay ahead of Michigan and its new head coach, Churnside — in the form of the only other ranked opponent in the event, Arizona State.

The Wolverines once again opened the game with a lead, but the momentum soon shifted. Late in the second quarter, Michigan struggled to find open shots against the Sun Devil’s stifling defense, giving Arizona State a 5-4 lead heading into the second half.

“The trick for us is just being open-minded and just talking

through the whole process,” Utassy said. “It was definitely a challenge, but I think it brought out the best of us.”

Facing a deficit for the first time all season, the Wolverines maintained their poise. A deep shot from junior attacker Sammi Monroe followed by back-toback goals from Utassy tied the game at 7-7 with two minutes left in the third quarter. By the sixth minute in the fourth quarter, they took a 9-7 lead.

Just as it seemed Michigan had settled into a groove that gave it the lead, the Sun Devils responded. A penalty shot by Arizona State attacker Juliette Dhalluin with a minute and a half left in the game ultimately sent the game into overtime.

“I looked at them and I said, ‘We’re gonna win this game’, ” Churnside said. “We’re playing to win and ASU was playing not to lose.”

After each team scored a goal in overtime, the Wolverines had the last possession. With the shot clock winding down, O’Neil was forced into taking a deep shot that found the net, securing Michigan’s undefeated start to its season.

The offensive and defensive consistency throughout the challenge increased confidence in the new coaching staff and the Wolverines’ depth, but whether they are able to maintain an all-around performance against high-ranked opponents will be their true test.

GRACE BEAL/Daily

WATER POLO

SAMUEL NOVOTNY

WRESTLING

KEITH MELONG/Daily

TASMIA JAMIL For The Daily

In the Michigan Invitational, the Wolverines showed their strength on the track, but struggled in field events.

In his sixth year at Michigan, Jack Medley delivered an upset win to open the team’s dual with Wisconsin.

After breezing through its first three games, the No. 7 Michigan water polo team defeated

complete an undefeated weekend.

Michigan dominates in-state rival Michigan State, 70-55

gan’s defense not only forced 22 Spartan turnovers, but also held them to an abysmal shooting clip of 15.8% from beyond the arc.

In its last four games, the No. 17 Michigan women’s basketball team has alternated wins and losses. Returning home to Crisler Center with over 10,000 fans in attendance for the second straight game — a program first — the Wolverines were looking to build off their win at Purdue in a bid to start a new trend.

And behind double-figure scoring from four players, Michigan (15-3 overall, 5-2 Big Ten) pulled away in the second quarter to handle rival Michigan State (10-8, 2-5), 70-55.

Despite Michigan’s slow start from the field in the first quarter, its defense held the Spartans to just 11 points — their lowest first-quarter total of the season.

The Wolverines forced nine turnovers, setting up their offense in transition by converting those opportunities into nine of their 14 first-quarter points.

“I think that’s something that we’ve really been pretty successful at so far this season, is being able to turn people over,” fifthyear senior wing Leigha Brown said. “And then I think that leads to easy looks in transition, especially (with) defenses that really pack you in the paint like MSU does.”

Throughout the game, Michi-

Following a quick four points from Michigan State out of the break, the Wolverines needed to respond. 3-pointers from sophomore guard Laila Phelia and senior guard Maddie Nolan put them back on top, but Michigan needed something more in order to pull away.

And Brown provided it.

Following another Spartan turnover, Brown drove up the court, pulling up at the top of the key. Withstanding contact from a Michigan State defender, Brown elevated to sink the shot and draw the foul, sending the Crisler Center crowd into a roar. And a few minutes later with just two seconds left in the quarter, Brown sank a shot that sent Michigan into the break with momentum and an eight-point lead.

For a moment, however, it looked like the Wolverines would once again fall victim to thirdquarter offensive issues, committing two early turnovers and struggling with the Spartan press.

But for only the second time in the last five games — and second straight game — Michigan outscored its opponent in the third quarter, a trend that it hopes to sustain. The Wolverines’ aggression on offense picked up, drawing more fouls and opportunities

at the free throw line. Those fouls forced two Spartans into foul trouble with four apiece, relegating both of them to the bench and helping Michigan solidify control.

“(In the second half) I thought we needed to be more aggressive and try to get to the rim and get

Buy-in mentality backs up Erik Portillo’s excellence

JOHN TONDORA Daily Sports Writer

The scene was different less than 24 hours ago.

“It’s unacceptable. It’s embarrassing honestly,” junior defenseman Jacob Truscott said Friday.

“We can’t play like that. Ever,” sophomore forward Mackie Samoskevich said Saturday.

“I just think we gotta be better all around,” graduate forward Nolan Moyle said Friday.

On Friday night, the Michigan hockey team suffered its first five-goal home loss since 1999 in a 7-2 trouncing to Ohio State.

The Wolverines appeared asleep at the wheel, missing defensive assignments, skipping poorly timed breakout passes and ceding 52 shots directly onto the shoulders of junior goaltender Erik Portillo.

Though the final score was lopsided, Portillo’s efforts Friday nonetheless saved an ugly game from devolving into a crime scene. Nevertheless, his effort fell to the wayside.

Yet before the earth could complete a full rotation, the Wolverines walked away with a 4-2 victory — not just because of Portillo, but the guys in front of him.

In Friday’s postgame press conference, Naurato and his players spoke of “buy in” and the

need to approach each and every game with a survivalist mentality. Evidently absent in game one, Saturday’s contest presented a flipped script.

Suddenly, missed assignments became finished checks, poor breakouts became opportunistic chances and Michigan’s defensive efforts allowed Portillo’s performance to resonate into a victory.

The Wolverines came to play with a new buy-in mentality.

“Kids get Christmas tickets to come watch us play,” freshman forward Rutger McGroarty said. “Christmas presents to come watch us play. We can’t take this for granted and we gotta do it for the guy next to us.”

The most important teammate may not be the ones next to McGroarty and Michigan though, but the one behind them. With this invigorated mentality came a style of play and support system that represented how important Portillo is to his team. Just like Friday, he came up with numerous meaningful saves. But this time, the team around him translated those into a win.

“We trust him in there,” Samoskevich said. “Whenever he makes a big, big save, we get up on the bench and it definitely gives us energy and he’s a rock back there. We trust him. We love him back there and (he’s) definitely a leader on the team too.”

KATE HUA/Daily

The Wolverines came to play. Not only for the benefit of those who found tickets under their Christmas tree, but for Portillo. With a combined 18 blocked shots, Michigan’s buyin resonated throughout the contest. Ohio State’s 52 shots Friday shrunk to a more manageable 39.

Portillo’s performance never wavered throughout the weekend. What changed was the five guys on the ice out in front of him. Portillo made the same big saves on Friday that came on Saturday, yet without the same resounding impact. This time though, those saves shine through and made all the difference.

A difference, that was only possible through the support of others. In critical moments, Michigan’s “buy-in” style of play alleviated Portillo and shifted the narrative.

“We have to survive and when your back is against the wall, it really shows true character when those guys step in,” Naurato said. “Luke Hughes, he flipped six pucks 20 feet in the air at the end of the game just to get it out versus going for the empty net — that’s winning hockey.”

Portillo played winning hockey all weekend. It only translated to the win column when the Wolverines decided to join him.

BASKETBALL

sure all the time, get stops and draw fouls.”

On the defensive end, sophomore guard Jordan Hobbs stepped up, drawing a charge — Michigan’s third out of four of the game — and pumping her arms in celebration. On the subsequent

possession, Hobbs sank a 3-pointer to eventually take a comfortable 12-point lead into the fourth. That lead was a result of the Wolverines turning around their third-quarter misfortunes from games past.

“Third quarters have been a huge emphasis in the locker room coming out,” graduate forward Emily Kiser said. “Earlier on in the season, those weren’t our best quarters. In the Purdue game that we just played, that was huge to just come out (and that) started on the defensive side. Because when we get stops, they couldn’t press (and) we can kind of go in transition, which I think was huge. And then I think we cleaned up better on the boards this time which helped that run start.”

Despite surrendering 12 offensive rebounds in the game, Michigan only allowed two second-chance points, and outrebounded Michigan State 18-16 in the second half. Throughout the entire fourth quarter, the Spartans weren’t able to make a dent in Michigan’s lead. The Wolverines’ offense did what it had to do to keep the lead and win, but its defense — which surrendered its fewest points in conference play thus far — carried them to victory down the stretch.

With the win, Michigan defeated its in-state rival and built upon its last victory, sparking what it hopes will be a winning pattern.

Michigan overcomes sloppy play to beat Northwestern, 85-78

LINDSAY BUDIN Daily Sports Writer

Freshman wing Jett Howard had one word to describe the Michigan men’s basketball team’s win over Northwestern: resilient.

And that resilience was crucial to counteract sloppy play and poor decision making as the Wolverines (10-7 overall, 4-2 Big Ten) struggled to assert their dominance. The sloppiness kept them from pulling away until late in the second half, eventually defeating Northwestern (12-5, 3-3), 85-78. Behind a season-high 18 turnovers, Michigan allowed the Wildcats to claw their way back into the game after the Wolverines’ hot start. But when Michigan needed to, it cleaned up its act.

“I thought we put ourselves in position on the road to get one, which isn’t easy,” Northwestern coach Chris Collins said. “Our guys did a really good job of doing that, but Michigan made more plays than us, they made more shots and they did the things that were worthy of winning today.”

Although the Wolverines shot well early to build a double-digit lead, their sloppiness shone through. Lazy crosscourt passes provided Northwestern several additional opportunities, and midway through the first half the Wildcats started to find their groove on offense. As Northwestern started heating up, Michigan went cold, shooting just 1-for-9 from behind the arc to finish the first half.

The Wolverines have excelled in controlling the ball and limiting turnovers so far this season, ranking fourth in the country with just 9.4 turnovers per game. But on Sunday that wasn’t the

case, conceding nine turnovers in the first half alone.

“Having 18 turnovers, it’s not all because of the freshman,” Michigan coach Juwan Howard said. “But those mistakes that we’re making, hopefully by the end of the year we won’t make the same mistakes. But we’ve done a really good job overall of taking care of the basketball up until tonight.”

Just as Michigan bounced back from Thursday’s loss, it bounced back from an uncharacteristically sloppy half. Doing that wasn’t convoluted, it just took resilience.

“I think we’re just resilient,” Jett said. “We understand basketball is just a game of runs. If we lay down and we’re not resilient, we wouldn’t have the outcome that we wanted.”

Coming out of the break, Michigan still displayed some of that same carelessness. It allowed offensive rebounds and secondchance plays to Northwestern while continuing to dish out poor passes. But it also showed the resilience Jett described.

While turnovers continued to plague the Wolverines, they found some consistency on the offensive end, which kept them neck-andneck with the Wildcats. As the offense started to run smoothly, Michigan made amends, dishing out bullets instead of slow, rainbow-esque lobs.

“That was self-inflicted,” Jett said. “… We weren’t smart in the first half. Second half, we still had turnovers but were a little smarter. … We just had to adjust because in our offense the guy on the wing has to get the ball to create and start to play. So they understood that and did a good job of defending that.”

Michigan may not have totally eliminated the turnovers, but it

made adjustments and found ways to counteract them. Namely, it leaned on a potent and selfless offense. The Wolverines also exerted more aggression on the glass, collecting nine offensive boards in the second half, a complete turnaround after a measly two in the first.

Fueled by junior center Hunter Dickinson and freshman forward Tarris Reed Jr.’s intensity in that facet, Michigan began to build momentum.

As the Wolverines’ play started to click back into place and they strung defensive stops together, Michigan began to play more like its usual self, taking care of the ball.

“In the past games, one of the things we learned when we lost was we weren’t aggressive and we weren’t assertive towards the end of the game,” Jett said. “Just understanding that and making that adjustment worked out for us, and I feel like we should do that every time now since we’re already battle tested with that.”

With just under eight minutes left, that aggression appeared effective in getting the Wolverines back on track.

Dickinson intercepted a Northwestern pass, and Michigan for once capitalized on a turnover instead of committing one.

The steal led to a transition 3-pointer by graduate guard Joey Baker, who sank the dagger to give the Wolverines a seven point advantage — one that never wavered.

While errant passes and unforced turnovers dictated the trajectory of the game early, Michigan overcame it, displaying its ability to take lessons from previous losses and use it to grow.

stops on defense,” Michigan coach Kim Barnes Arico said. “Because if we got stops on defense, I felt like we were able to get out and transition and really get downhill against them. And I thought that was a really big turning point for us not to have to handle their pres-

JULIANNE YOON/Daily

MEN’S

ICE HOCKEY

RUN IT BACK

With Harbaugh and Corum back, Michigan is set to contend again

JARED GREENSPAN Daily Sports Writer

Of all the moments that defined the Michigan football team’s 2022 season, there’s one that I keep circling back to.

Sixty-six minutes before the Wolverines’ clash with Ohio State — a bout for Big Ten East supremacy — Jim Harbaugh and Blake Corum emerged together from the tunnel that led to Michigan’s locker room. They walked in lockstep, head coach and star running back, snaking down the ramp and onto the field in Columbus for the biggest iteration of The Game since 2006.

As reporters and cameras crowded the tunnel’s entrance on each side, both Harbaugh and Corum felt omnipresent — the coach who turned around the program and the running back who carried its offense throughout the season.

Two months later, they feel that way again. Last Monday, Corum announced that he is returning to Michigan for his senior season, postponing his NFL aspirations by a year. A week later, Monday afternoon, Harbaugh officially ended his latest NFL pursuit, reaffirming his commitment to the program.

“My heart is at the University of Michigan,” Harbaugh wrote in a statement. “I once heard a wise man say, ‘Don’t try to out-happy, happy.’ Go Blue!”

Harbaugh’s decision isn’t as simple as his enthusiasm makes it seem. If it was, he wouldn’t have conducted a virtual interview with the Denver Broncos for their head-coaching vacancy, dragging Michigan’s feet for the second consecutive offseason. Afterall, he promised not to do so in February.

No one knows exactly why Harbaugh flirted with an NFL return again. Perhaps he wanted to pursue a Super Bowl and the prestige that comes with it. Maybe he saw a chance to escape the elements that define modern college football: recruiting, NIL, the transfer portal. Or, maybe, he was content with the legacy that he built for himself across seven seasons.

For the sake of exercise, let’s zero in on the saying that Harbaugh quoted: “Don’t try to out-happy, happy.”

It’s certainly applicable here, since Harbaugh has Michigan at its apex. The Wolverines are coming off two straight Big Ten Championships, consecutive victories over Ohio State and backto-back appearances in the College Football Playoff.

In March, when asked if his desire to win a Super Bowl had been quenched, Harbaugh deflected, instead focusing on the potential of his current team:

“Yeah, we could win college football’s greatest trophy, we could win the national championship,” he said. “And that’s plenty good.”

Ten months later, nothing has changed. Once again, Michigan fell just shy of its ultimate goal. Next year, the Wolverines seem primed for more dominance and perhaps even greater heights. They return eight defensive starters and their

calculus changed.

“I didn’t like the feeling of getting injured in the Big House and leaving like that,” Corum said.

“I want to finish off my legacy, finish what I started.”

Corum isn’t coming back for fun and games — that’s not in his DNA, both literally and figuratively. He comes from a lineage of industrious workers, his grandfather a mason and his father in charge of a landscaping business. There are stories of Corum’s work ethic, which include 4 a.m. boxing sessions and 3:30 a.m. wake-up calls. So when he says he’s going to finish what he started, well, you’re best off believing him.

But Corum needs help to do so, which is why he talked to his offensive line “a lot” during the decision-making process.

“I’m like, ‘Listen, it’s just one more year,’ ” Corum said. “ ‘Let’s go finish what we started. Let’s stick together because this team is something special.’ ”

Evidently, they agreed. Senior Trevor Keegan announced his return on Thursday, declaring that he wants “legend status.” Junior Zak Zinter followed suit Sunday, saying that he’s “back to finish what we started.”

three most-talented skill position players in Corum, sophomore quarterback J.J. McCarthy and sophomore running back Donovan Edwards.

That allure is hard to pass up. Corum, in the same vein as Harbaugh, realized that, too.

“I’m willing to do whatever it takes to win it all,” Corum said on the “In the Trenches” podcast. “I hope Team 144 is ready. I’m going to make sure they’re ready.”

Corum’s decision is worth ruminating on. Because, much like Harbaugh’s, it wasn’t a simple one.

Running backs have notoriously short shelf lives, and Corum just suffered a major injury that will necessitate months of grueling rehab. What if he doesn’t come back with the same electricity?

What if he gets hurt again and his draft stock plummets? Those are all fair questions, especially since Corum likely turned down the security of a mid-round selection, and the accompanying draft money, to stay in school.

He didn’t always think that he’d come back — he said that his initial mindset was to merely get surgery and prepare for the draft. But his

The sentiment went beyond the offensive line. Fifth-year linebacker Mike Barrett joined them Sunday. So did senior receiver Cornelius Johnson.

Junior defensive lineman Kris Jenkins returned, too, saying that “last year wasn’t enough.”

The caveat, among all the feel-good mojo, is that nothing is guaranteed. This sentiment proved similar last offseason, following Michigan’s loss to Georgia at the Orange Bowl. The program clamored for redemption, using that game as fuel through long winter days and grueling summer practices.

But this year ended similarly, perhaps even more painfully. Just like the season prior, this year resulted in Michigan players standing under a drizzle of confetti, solemn spectators for another team’s celebration, wondering what could have been.

Maybe that happens again, maybe it doesn’t.

But with Harbaugh and Corum officially in the fold, and a strong corps surrounding them, the pieces are in place for Michigan to contend for a national championship — again.

The pieces are in place for Michigan to contend for a national championship — again.

GRACE BEAL/Daily Design by Lys Goldman