Midtown Magazine

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THE ISSUE

n o v e mber/december

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2011

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Gina Pearce Stephens

Adver tising Sales Gina Stephens | Myra Gammon | Regina Alston Creative Director Travis Aptt Graphic Design Heath Hilliker | Jennifer Casey Contributing Writers Christa Gala | Kate Turgeon | Dan Bain Illyse Lane | Jenni Hart | Page Leggett Darcy Brennan-Huante | Fiquet Bailey Swain Carter & Laura Dalton | Elie Rossetti-Serraino Anna Quinn Harrelson, MD | Beth Briere, MD Paul L. Burroughs, MD Photography Jennifer Robertson Photography

Midtown Magazine is published six times annually. Any reproduction in part or in whole of any part of this publication is prohibited without the express written consent of the publisher. Midtown Magazine is not responsible for unsolicited manuscripts, photography or art. Unsolicited material is welcome and is considered intended for publication. Such material will become the property of the magazine and will be subject to editing. Material will be returned if accompanied by a self-addressed stamped envelope. Midtown Magazine will not knowingly accept any real estate advertising in violation of U.S. equal opportunity law.

GRILLING, SK YDIVING, BEER, APPS, MUSIC, MOVIES & MORE!

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guide

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DIA M OND

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I think I’m a thankful person and that I show gratitude for my blessings, but recently someone said to me “What if tomorrow you lost all the things you weren’t grateful for today?” At first I was annoyed; I thought it seemed like a judgmental statement. However, the more I considered it, I wondered if I was truly grateful for my everyday blessings? Maybe this is what author Robert Brault meant when he said “Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.” In “Thanks A Lot” (p.26) we look at gratitude and how it may simply be your approach to life – glass half full or glass half empty? This article will have you grateful for dirty dishes after you read it! With that “glass half full” outlook, the holiday season is the best and busiest time of the year for most families. I am excited to share this issue; it’s overflowing with ideas for making the holidays more enjoyable. From the things we want to do to the things we need to do, we’ve compiled ideas for getting your to-do list done! Cooking and decorating for the holidays can be overwhelming for even the a bona-fide “Martha Stewart” hostess. In “Holiday Touches” (p.70), local boutiques share ideas for sprinkling holiday spirit throughout your home. Check out “Holiday Hosting” (p.94) for ideas on hosting a great party that everyone will enjoy, including you! In “Holiday Lovin’ from the Oven” (p. 60), Chef Mario shares some of his most decadent cookie recipes! Make these cookies and your kids will be convinced you’re one of Santa’s elves. Also check out “Get Lucky” (p.114) for the must-haves on your New Year’s Day menu (my mom even shared her wealthy healthy stewed tomatoes recipe). And for conquering your holiday shopping list, check out our “2011 Holiday Gift Guide” (p.74); this pull-out book is filled with ideas for everyone on your shopping list! From $5 to $5,000, you’ll find great gifts available in Midtown or nearby. Every issue I ask you to let us know what you like or don’t like about Midtown and thankfully many of you respond. You share your opinions and your story ideas, and for this I am grateful. Thank you for letting Midtown into your home. Merry Christmas!

Publisher/Par tner Gina Stephens

UT -O NG LL DI PU ED DE W UI G

a n o te F R O M the publisher

The Reason for the Season

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WINNERS!

IN FOOD, FUN, PEOPLE, STYLE, SHOPPING & MORE!

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J A N U A RY / F E B R U A RY

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Subscriptions 6 print issues (1 year) only $20 Available online via paypal ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• 4818 Six Forks Road, Suite 204 Raleigh, NC 27609 Phone 919.782.4710, Fax 919.782.4763 www.midtownmag.com

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contents november/december

features 26 thanks a lot

Gratitude and why it matters.

34 see adam run

From not being able to walk to competing in cross-country meets, 13 year-old Adam Whiteside has overcome the odds.

52 whats in your closet?

Many of us have a conglomeration of clothing, eighty percent of which we don’t wear because, well, we just don’t love a lot of what we own.

62 Forget About It…Or Not

Fortunately, with just a little effort, we can improve our memories.

70 Holiday Touches

Our shops and designers share simple holiday touches.

75 painting with blue

From light and airy to deep and mysterious...they are all beautiful. Our designers share their favorite shades of blue.

2011

94 holiday hosting

Tips from the experts to help you relieve some stress this Holiday season

What’s the best way to monitor our kids’ access to technology?

102 safe surfing

110 having the heart to heart

What happens when you notice that your parents may be having a hard time taking care of things?

get lucky 114

Will you have good luck this year? No one knows for sure, but there’s no harm in indulging in a few traditional superstitions.

Local Celebrations Bring 120 Fun, Fame to Carolina Christmas

It’s all here, between our borders, and there’s no way you could ever do and see it all. We’ve narrowed a list down to eleven.

84 dresses fit for a party

Hot dresses for the cool, holiday season.

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2011 Holiday gift guide

From $5 to $5,000, you’ll find great gifts available in Midtown or nearby.

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contents november/decembe r

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departments 40 MIDTOWN REVIEWS 60 CHEF MARIO 68 BAIN’S BEAT 82 CALENDAR 92 BEAUTY 128 TALK OF THE TOWN MIDTOWN MEETS DOWNTOWN

45 rugs

130 THE MOMENTS THAT RESONATE 135 NYE IN DTR – 12 REASONS TO GIVE THE ACORN ITS DUE 142 HEALTHY YOU 150 MIDTOWN MINGLES

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THANKS A LOT

GRATITUDE

AND

WHY

IT

MATTERS

BY KATE TURGEON

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Consider the Pilgrims. By the time they cast their anchor at what’s now Cape Cod, they had endured 66 days at sea. They missed their Hudson River destination. And seasickness, scurvy and pneumonia were facts of life. They weren’t coming off the best circumstances, either – fleeing Holland (financial problems) after first fleeing England (church issues). And you know those big white collars history portrays as typical Pilgrim attire? Those things had to be yellow and dingy. midtownmag.com| 27

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I don’t know about you, but if I were on a trip where we missed the destination by hundreds of miles, half the travelers got sick and all my white clothes turned yellow, well, thankfulness isn’t the word that comes to mind. I know. I’m judging the 1600s by 2011 standards. No fair, right? OK. If I were living then, I may have been just as grateful as those weary Pilgrims were when that first corn crop grew from the earth. But, today, thankfulness can seem like a tall order. Really. I have never seen anyone in a grocery store aisle ready to party because corn is available. Thankfulness, or gratitude, can be difficult when there are a multitude of messages reminding us of what we lack. “There’s actually an awful lot competing against gratitude,” explains Lisa Sacco, a doctor of psychology with Orenstein Solutions. “Let’s start with our physical selves. Our brains are wired to pick out ‘what’s wrong’ or ‘what’s different.’ This is helpful from a survival standpoint. However, our brains don’t distinguish between real versus perceived threats.” The result of always focusing on “what’s wrong” isn’t pretty. We wind up anxious and overloaded, says Sacco. “In many ways, having a grateful stance…true appreciation…is the best combatant against our busy, constantly threat-assessing brains,” she adds. The science of thankfulness Studies insist on the importance of gratitude on our overall health and well-being. Researchers at the University of California (UC), Davis and UC, Berkley have found that people who practice gratitude report having benefits such as: • Stronger immune systems • Lower blood pressure • Better sleep patterns • Higher levels of positive emotions, and more optimism. Living Gratitude Yes, gratitude is wonderful. But it isn’t necessarily natural. Sure, there are people who seem to exude it. Take my mother, the only woman I know who has actually looked at a sink full of dirty dishes and smiled. To her, a stack of dishes means that there’s plenty of food to share and plenty of people to share it with. To me, that stack of dishes is what stands between me and a decent bedtime. But maybe my mother has just been practicing gratefulness longer than I have. It is, after all, something that requires a bit of work. “Being grateful, or expressing gratitude, is a mindset to be cultivated. It’s about noticing and acknowledging people or things for which we’re grateful on a daily basis,” says Sacco, who admits that she, too, has to work on it. “I can actually be sort of edgy and impatient sometimes, but being mindful of gratitude calls me back to my better parts.” Thankfully, (see I can do this!), there are ways to

what does this mean to you?

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cultivate this thinking. Sacco suggests starting by using basic manners and kindness toward other people. Easy enough, right? In some psychology circles, this is known as the cycle of abundance. Giving to others (even in non-monetary ways) leads to feelings of gratefulness in one’s own life and that grateful feeling leads – you guessed it – to giving to others. Other ways to practice gratefulness are:

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keeping a gratitude Journal Each day, jot down five things you’re grateful for. “There are physical and mental benefits from paying attention to gratitude…we know that what we pay attention to, or focus on, grows,” says Sacco. Not big on journaling? Consider using your daily walk or work commute to mentally list what you’re grateful for. learning about the topic Books such as Thanks!: How Practicing Gratitude Can Make You Happier (Robert Emmons), The Psychology of Gratitude (Affective Science), and The Gratitude Factor: Enhancing Your Life through Grateful Living (Charles M. Shelton) can help cultivate feelings of gratitude.

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“expressing gratitude and paying attention to what is working in one’s life requires honesty about one’s reality. That does not mean one ignores the pain or suffering…instead, a person views the situation in its entirety and pays equal attention to the ‘good parts.’” ~ Dr. Lisa Sacco, Orenstein Solutions interior harmony_nd.pdf 10/5/11 11:57:30 AM

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Relaxed, Rejuvenated and Refreshed •

FACIALS •

MICRODERMABRASION •

GIFT CARDS AVAILABLE

PEELS

WAXING

LASH/BROW TINTING

MAKEUP APPLICATION

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remembering that it’s ok to think about what’s not good, too For those who feel anxious and depressed, Sacco suggests shifting focus to gratefulness, even in the midst of those negative emotions. “You’ll notice I didn’t say we have to stop what we’re thinking or change our thoughts of being anxious…rather, we are willing to have those thoughts…and be able to acknowledge other, more positive aspects,” she says.

Maybe those 1621 Pilgrims were having those thoughts about the sickness, navigational misstep and, yes, the dirty collars. But their practice of thankfulness and gratitude for what was positive must have led them to that table for venison, corn, shellfish and roasted meat. (Wait! No mashed potatoes? OK. Working on it.)

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stuck in

traffic? Ugh! You can sit in your car, fume, change lanes frantically and let irritation spike your blood pressure. Or, as Sacco suggests, you can acknowledge how frustrating it is but realize that you’re in that traffic because you have a job, a car and a home. “Does that take away the traffic and its irritants? Absolutely not. That’s the reality. But paying attention to what you have to be grateful for in that scenario can shift your experience of it,” she says.

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M M

ayor cFarlane

sounds kind of catchy, huh? Well, get used to it. as the swearing-in date approaches, Midtown Magazine caught up with Mayor-elect Mcfarlane and chatted about her motivation, Midtown and her vision for raleigh. BY ILLYSE LANE PHOTOGRAPHY BY JACQUELINE PERRY PHOTOGRAPHY

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w

aFteR FouR yeaRs on the City CounCiL, nanCy mCFaRLane is LooKinG FoRwaRd to heR RoLe as mayoR oF RaLeiGh.

When Nancy McFarlane told her son she was McFarlane, who has spent the past four years running for mayor, he asked her why she’d serving on the City Council. “The more you want to get blamed for everything? do, the more you find out about, and the more Fact is, that was probably a legitimate you find out about, the more you learn what question, considering the times. But has to be done. Why would you not do it?” fortunately, McFarlane didn’t quite see things McFarlane’s “just do it” nature is fueled that way, throwing her name in the race withby her tremendous thirst for learning. And out any hesitation. “I just think that when you hamilton that thirst8/8/11 has contributed to her success as a hill_so.pdf 10:19:07 AM see stuff that needs to be done, you do it,” says local business owner and as a City Councilor.

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“I have loved learning about how a fire hydrant works and about traffic engineering. I’ve loved getting firsthand experience about our local firefighters by running into a burning building at the department’s training facility,” she says with a smile, remembering how sweaty and claustrophobic she felt in the 110 degree heat as she tried to lug an 180-pound sandbag body to safety – which she did, by the way. She’s also humble, quick to downplay her capturing 61 percent of the votes on election eve, saying that the numbers were more a vote of confidence as to the city of Raleigh’s direction than about her. “I think people love our city and they are happy with the direction we are going in,” says McFarlane. “They want that to continue, and know that we have potential to do more.” Midtown is an essential piece of the “do more” strategy. The 2030 Comprehensive Plan, which takes into account how Raleigh’s population will grow and the demographic changes, has designated Midtown as a primary growth center and a significant connector for major projects. And McFarlane’s commitment to well-planned development and small business has a natural synergy with what continues to be happening in Midtown. “Midtown is a model as to what we will see as our area grows and as we develop a comprehensive transit plan. The walkable, livable North Hills lifestyle is what we will see around transit stops,” says McFarlane. Development around transit gives cities the ability to build a strong economic base, helping to drive the local economy. “A critical piece of that economic boost is the success of our locally-owned small businesses,” says McFarlane. “Of course, it’s great to have the big companies, but small, locally-owned businesses will bring us out of the recession.” Just a glance around the thriving North Hills area confirms this, with over half the businesses being locally owned. To help small businesses across the city, McFarlane would love to implement a branding strategy that would help citizens identify locally-owned businesses throughout our shopping areas. “Knowing that 68 percent of every dollar spent locally goes back into the local economy, some type of signage that a business owner could use to remind customers that the money spent in these businesses stays in the community is important,” she says. And even more important to McFarlane is for all of us to maintain our great sense of pride in Raleigh. “We are a city of choice. You can live downtown, Midtown or in the suburbs, within many different neighborhoods. And people identify with and are very proud of their particular area,” says McFarlane. “Our challenge is to use our differences to celebrate Raleigh and the potential that it brings for us to be connected to each other.” midtownmag.com| 33

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SEE ADAM RUN BY ILLYSE LANE

When Christi Whiteside watched her 13-year- old son Adam cross the finish line at his first cross country meet, her tears flowed with good reason. Just nine months before, Adam, now an eighth grader at Endeavor Charter School, was lying in a hospital bed, unable to walk.

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A

Adam’s story began in January 2010, the Sunday before returning to school after winter break. “Adam said his shoes were bothering him and he thought he needed new ones,” says Christi. “To know Adam, this was unusual. He’s the kid who’ll wear his shoes until I tell him it’s time to get a new pair.” Not giving the matter much thought, Christi added it to her mental list of things to do. The days progressed and on Wednesday, Adam and his younger sister, Ashley, returned to class. But Christi, who works at their school, couldn’t help but notice that Adam’s gait seemed off as he walked down the hallway. “I can’t really describe what was wrong, but you know your kid and it was just off,” she remembers. While a quick trip to the doctor on Friday indicated that Adam’s slightly troubling gait, along with a headache, could likely be viral, by Sunday morning the situation had changed dramatically. “He had been a little stiff on Saturday, but by Sunday he couldn’t hold his own weight,” says Christi. “It was like watching a baby horse trying to stand up for the first time.” “I was pretty scared and I could see on my parents’ faces that they were scared and trying not to show it,” remembers Adam. “I just didn’t understand why this was happening.” With Adam feeling extremely weak and the rest of the family feeling absolutely helpless, multiple complicated and uncomfortable tests, including a CT scan and spinal tap, were performed in an effort to figure out what was going on. Late that evening, they received the diagnosis: Guillain-Barre syndrome.

The Diagnosis

According to the Mayo Clinic, Guillain-Barre syndrome is a disorder in which the body’s immune system mistakenly attacks the nerves, leading to inflammation that causes tingling, muscle weakness and eventual paralysis. The main concern is the paralysis spreading to the respiratory system, forcing the patient to require breathing assistance. Symptoms begin in the feet and legs and spread up the body, which explained Adam’s foot pain. While it can occur at any age, it’s most common for people between the ages of 30 and 50, making Adam’s case extremely rare. There is no cure for Guillain-Barre syndrome, but there are treatments to help manage the symptoms. Most people do recover completely, with the paralysis and weakness eventually receding in a way that is similar to a wave that washes into the shore and back out again, but the midtownmag.com| xx 71

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process can take anywhere from weeks to years, with some patients experience lingering effects. Adam was lucky. With the exception of having very limited range of motion in his shoulders, his symptoms stopped around the waist area. “But when you are a 12-year-old boy, you think you’re in charge of the world. When suddenly, you can’t brush your teeth or stand up, you’re just shattered,” says Christi.

The Decision to Fight

says Adam’s father, Rob. “He was showing that he was strong, and he took it in stride.” But it was still scary for Adam. He was completely dependent on his parents for every little thing, including untangling the blankets that would wrap around his legs while he slept. And he couldn’t help but wonder if and when the receding would begin.

Starting From Scratch

After one week in the hospital, when his For Adam, who played on the school soccer condition was stable, Christi and Rob took At first I wasn’t quite team and was prepared to take on the role a step in the healing direction, taking Adam as the Grinch in the school musical, worry home. “We didn’t know if this would be our sure what was wrong, set in. “At first I wasn’t quite sure what was new normal or if things would get better, but wrong, and when it started getting worse, we knew letting him sleep in his own bed and when it started I was worried I wouldn’t be the same ever and getting him some of his favorite homegetting worse, I was again,” says Adam. cooked food had to help,” says Christi. But even at the lowest point – when Determined to get out of the wheelworried I wouldn’t be he was sick from the immunoglobulin chair that was now such an essential part therapy treatments that were given to stop of his life, an exhausted Adam immediately the same ever again. the progression; when his normally skinny began physical therapy. “Adam came in with frame lost 11 pounds over the course of a his parents, and I could tell they were very week and when he needed assistance just to apprehensive about his prognosis and what maintain a sitting position – Adam found something within himself the outcomes would be,” says Andrew Garner, DPT, of Trinity Wellthat propelled him on. “I told myself that there was only one way ness Center. “The first few sessions were spent trying to determine out of this, and I had to push through and keep working until this his functional ability, and it was pretty limited.” While walking was the ultimate goal, they began with the stopped,” remembers Adam. “I was so proud of him, they were doing all the worst tests they basics, as Adam tried to use his core strength to sit on a bench could possibly do. And Adam was like, ‘bring it on’, making jokes,” upright and learn how to get from the wheelchair into the car. There

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roB, christi And AshLey Are AdAm’s Biggest fAns during his cross country meets.

A helping hand

was also a tremendous psychological part to the therapy, as Garner made sure that Adam knew that because he was so young, his body had the ability to come back. “Therapy was hard and it hurt, but it began to get easier. I was determined to be better than I was before,” says Adam.

Christi Whiteside was always one to cook a dinner for a family in need, but she never fully appreciated what it meant until Adam got sick. “I had originally said ʻno’ to dinners, but i came to realize what a big relief it was to not have to think about it,” she says. It also helped them stay on track with their daughter, Ashley, ensuring that her day was as normal as possible. If you are looking to help a family in a similar situation, Christi suggests offering to transport siblings or sending a little basket of supplies (think bottles of water, snacks, magazines or puzzle books) for the parents while they’re spending days and nights at the hospital. “but really, just simple acts of kindness are so appreciated,” says Christi.

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Some Semblance of Normal

After that first week at home, Christi and Rob decided that it was time for Adam to head back to school. “He could only do so much therapy in a day, and we knew he needed to feel some semblance of normal and be a part of things,” recalls Christi. But the day was not without nervous anticipation, with the entire family wondering how Adam, in his wheelchair and still very exhausted, would be perceived. Adam arrived at recess, with Christi wheeling him out onto the playground, unsure of what to expect. And as she stood there with Adam, she heard something that made all of her emotions come to a head and just burst. “The first kid who saw him yelled out, ‘Adam’s home!’” recalls Christi. “Once I heard that, I knew everything was going to be okay,” remembers Adam. And even though he had to occasionally sneak a nap in the office and was not able to give his academics the attention he had previously, he felt accepted and supported. “That support, his tenacity and his sense of humor had a tremendous impact,” says Adam’s pediatrician, Dr. Christian Nechyba of Carolina Kids. “He always had a smile, even when we didn’t know how long his recovery would take.” midtownmag.com| 37

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W h ee l c h

air tricting c o n f i n e d th It rolled a rone o f de round w i a th th m e i ts Made me troph y s tand out f rom my p as t crowd Made me lose m y co ol Th a t s p e e d y l i t tl e t hing I t likes i t when you ride it I t h a te d i t when yo u’r e g o n e I t s t re tc h ed tr y ing to f it my f ra m e Sw er v e s a nd spins a When it c t ease ar r ies hea and screa v y loads i t groan ms i n pa i s I ts du t y i n s n ev er o v er f r o m o n When I sa e i n n ee d id good-b t o th e n e x ye it slum t ped and r olled awa y Th a t c o n s

WhiLe AdAm’s inner strength WAs instrumentAL in his recovery, he stiLL hAd frustrAtions. in his 7th grAde poetry proJects, he eXpressed his thoughts ABout his WheeLchAir.

First You Walk, Then You Run

Slowly, Adam relearned how to walk and shift his weight, setting goals based on the next greatest need. “At one point, we knew Rob would be heading out of town, and he was the one who helped Adam climb the eight steps to our front door and the staircase to his bedroom,” says Christi. So the goal was set for Adam to not only be able to climb those stairs, but also know what to do if he became tired halfway up and how his mother would help if he began to fall. “At first, I didn’t think I could make it up one step. But I did ten,” says Adam. “I felt really, really good, like I was getting better.” After a few weeks, Adam was able to leave the wheelchair outside the classroom and navigate the path to his desk. By spring break, he was ready to leave the chair completely and at the school musical, he took to the stage as planned. Stillresearch_nd_midtown.pdPage inspired to be even stronger than he had10:19:14 been metabolic 1 10/12/11 before, Adam began water therapy and when the summer

AM

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Adam fights for a position during one of his Endeavor cross country meets.

rolled in, he started hitting the gym with his uncle three mornings a week at 5:45am. “I don’t know if we had ever seen him work so hard. Maybe it’s because he had never been in a situation where everything was that difficult for that long a period of time,” says Christi. So it shouldn’t have come as a surprise when this past fall, Adam told his parents he wanted to run cross country. And while they wondered if he’d even be able to complete a race, they also knew that he had his strong will working in his favor. To watch Adam run at that very first meet, you’d have never guessed that just nine months earlier, he was questioning whether or not he would walk again. But when he’s out there on the course, he’s like every other runner, trying to fight fatigue because he knows how good he’ll feel when he crosses the finish line. It makes looking back on the entire experience almost surreal.

A Different Perspective

His parents feel as though they’ve become members of a club they never wanted to be a part of – a club for parents who have a really sick child. “You understand things differently, your priorities immediately shift and you find the time you didn’t think you had,” says Christi. With the benefit of hindsight, they are also able to fully grasp the emotional rollercoaster that comes with having a sick child. “On Valentine’s Day, I popped in to see Adam at school. I hadn’t seen him in the school environment yet, and when I saw him in the wheelchair, I was unprepared. It sunk in that this was reality,” says Rob. “But then just a month ago, I was dropping something off at school and I saw Adam in the background, running around and playing. That was a high point, and one of those moments I am grateful for.” For Adam, the rest of his eighth grade year is about his goal of making straight As and once again, performing in the school musical. He takes comfort in knowing that just because he’s had Guillain-Barre syndrome, he’s not at any higher risk to get it again. He’s been journaling about his experience and would love to use his improv skills to inspire others, recognizing that he accomplished a great feat. “I know that not everyone recovers. I’m proud of the effort I put into getting better,” says Adam. “I’m proud that I fought back.”

~ 48th Annual ~

ANTIQUES SHOW & SALE FRIDAY NOVEMBER 18 10AM-5PM SATURDAY NOVEMBER 19 10AM-5PM SUNDAY NOVEMBER 20 11AM-5PM KERR SCOTT BUILDING, NC STATE FAIRGROUNDS RALEIGH, NC $7.00 TICKETS (GOOD FOR ALL 3 DAYS)

SHOW THIS AD FOR $1 OFF YOUR TICKET

The Woman’s Club of Raleigh WWW.WOMANSCLUBOFRALEIGH.COM

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MOVIES

MIDTOWN

REVIEWS

movies

The Muppets

Starring: Jason Segel, Amy Adams and Chris Cooper Rated: PG Opens: 11/23/2011 Plot: Walter and his friends Gary and Mary discover and try to stop the plan of oilman Tex Richman to raze the Muppet Theater and drill for the oil recently discovered beneath the Muppets’ former stomping grounds.

The Sitter Starring: Jonah Hill, Sam Rockwell and Ari Graynor Rated: R Opens: 12/9/2011 Plot: When the world’s most irresponsible babysitter takes three of the world’s worst kids on an unforgettable overnight adventure through the streets of New York City, it’s anyone’s guess who’s going to make it home in one piece.

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows

Starring: Robert Downey Jr., Jude Law and Jared Harris Rated: Not Yet Rated Opens: 12/16/2011 Plot: Sherlock Holmes has always been the smartest man in the room...until now. There is a new criminal mastermind at large (Professor Moriarty), and he just may have Holmes’ number.

Mission: Impossible Ghost Protocol Starring: Tom Cruise, Jeremy Renner, Simon Pegg Rated: Not Yet Rated Opens: 12/21/2011 Plot: The IMF is shut down when it’s implicated in the bombing of the Kremlin, causing Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) and his new team to go rogue to clear their organization’s name.

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1 Starring: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner Rated: PG-13 Opens: 11/18/2011 Plot: The epic love story between Bella Swan and Edward Cullen continues in part one of the final installment of the series. Bella, Edward and those they love must deal with the chain of consequences brought on by a marriage, honeymoon, and the tumultuous birth of a child…which brings an unforeseen and shocking development for Jacob. Part 1 begins the conclusion of the tale of vampire love, boundless friendship, acceptance, and finding your true self.

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MIDTOWN

REVIEWS

MUSIC

music

Break The Spell (Daughtry) Release Date: 11/21/2011 On November 21st, Chris Daughtry will release his 3rd album, Break the Spell, a long-awaited follow-up to his 2009 EP Leave This Town. Rockstar Weekly said to expect “a powerful collection of hooks and strong, rhythmic choruses that provide the perfect backdrop.”

My Life II...The Journey Continues (Act1) (Mary J. Blige) Release Date: 11/21/2011 Grammy-winning songstress Mary J. Blige’s highly anticipated new project My Life II...The Journey Continues will be released on November 8th and features collaborations with susperstars such as Beyonce, Nas and Rick Ross.

Talk That Talk (Rihanna) Release Date: 11/21/2011 Only a year after dropping Loud, Rihanna will release her sixth album, Talk That Talk, on November 21st. The album title suggests a sassy, tongue-in-cheek jab at her naysayers, critics and haters. Should we expect to see Walk That Walk next? Only time will tell.

El Camino (The Black Keys) Release Date: 12/6/2011 The Black Keys are back with El Camino, due out December 6th. Singer/guitarist Dan Auerbach promises “more straight ahead rock and roll” and “raw, driving, and back to basics.” The first single, ‘Lonely Boy,’ will be released on October 26th with production by Danger Mouse.

Undun (The Roots) Release Date: 12/6/2011 Undun is the first concept album by American hip hop band “The Roots“, re-telling the short life of one Redford Stephens (1974-1999). Using Redford’s dialogues, the legendary hip-hop group attempts to tell how free will and destiny affects the life ‘on the corner’ of Redford Stephens. midtownmag.com| 41

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MIDTOWN

REVIEWS

PIRATEFLEET FOR FRIENDS • Free

APPS

apps

Did you love playing BATTLESHIP® as a child? You will love playing PirateFleet with your friends. Take to the high seas and fight your fellow pirates. Get started and battle against your friends, with this multiplayer, turn-based game from the makers of Words with Friends.

iMUSCLE • $1.99

iMuscle is a sophisticated workout aid that can be taken anywhere. Use it to identify a body part or individual muscle by zooming into a 3-D human body with the musculature exposed. Then access all the exercises associated with the development/ rehabilitation of that muscle.

FIND MY FRIENDS • Free

Find My Friends allows you to easily locate your friends and family from your iPhone, iPad or iPod touch. Use Find My Friends to keep track of your traveling companions when you’re on vacation. Or to see if the kids are home from school. Or to find the friends you’re meeting for dinner.

PINTEREST • Free

Think of Pinterest as a virtual pinboard – a place to catalog and share the things you love. Pin anything that catches your eye: memorable meals, places to visit, or great shopping finds! Browse pins from people and pinboards you follow.

VLINGO • Free

INDEED • Free

Looking for Siri-like functionality on your iPhone 3GS or iPhone 4? Look no further. Simply speak to Vlingo and it will help you get more done, faster and easier than before. Vlingo even goes beyond the new Siri Assistant by integrating with your Facebook and Twitter accounts. Plus all functionality, including sms and email, is now completely free.

Find jobs using Indeed, the most comprehensive search engine for jobs. In a single search, Indeed offers free access to millions of jobs from thousands of company websites and job boards.

STASH PRO • $3.99

Stash is a private photo, video and document organizer, slideshow viewer, web browser and download manager all in one! Stash is the most advanced media manager and privacy app on the App Store, with many unique features.

HEYTELL • Free

HeyTell® is a cross-platform voice messenger that allows you to instantly talk with friends and family. No account needed – just start the app, choose a contact, and push the button to start talking! Use HeyTell as a walkie talkie, intercom or instant voice messaging system to send quick voice messages to friends and family with iPhones or iPods.

ZILLOW REAL ESTATE • Free

For all US homes (100+ million): Find Zestimate® home values, Rent Zestimates, homes for sale, homes for rent and more as you walk or drive through neighborhoods using the Zillow iPhone App, featuring built-in GPS technology.

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MIDTOWN

REVIEWS

BY DAVID SENDALL, Assistant Manager – Total Wine & More

MAILLY LES ECHANSONS GRAND CRU

WINE wine

LOUIS BOUILLOT BLANC DE NOIRS

Region: Champagne, France

Region: Burgundy, France

Tasting notes: A Pinot Noir-dominated Champagne from 70-yearold vines, this is gorgeous, rich and concentrated. Less than 11,000 total production.

Tasting notes: A refined blend of Pinot Noir from a village famous for excelling with the grape. Very Champagne-like, this aromatic sparkler is dry with notes of cherry fruit and a delicate, crisp finish.

Accolades: 93pts, Wine Enthusiast

Price: $15.99/bottle

Price: $99.99/bottle

FEUILLATTE PALMES D’OR BRUT Region: Champagne, France Tasting notes: Hints of toffee and anise, coffee, pastry and candied orange peel flavors in this supple Champagne, which sports a rich flavor profile in a restrained package, with a smoky note echoing on the finish.

ROBERT MONCUIT GRAND CRU BRUT Region: Champagne, France

Accolades: 92pts, Wine Spectator

Tasting notes: Savory aspects of umami turn bright, like sun warming limestone. It has focus and amplitude at once, slightly creamy, slightly leesy, completely energizing.

ARMANI PROSECCO DOC

Accolades: 93pts, Wine & Spirits

Region: Valdadige, Italy

sweetness with hints of white fruit. Elegance and finesse in the nose, paired with persistence in the mouth.

Price: $39.99/bottle

Tasting notes: A nice and delicate

Price: $15.99/bottle

Price: $99.99/bottle

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A new rug can have a dramatic impact on any room in your home. It can add a splash of color or cozy warmth. Showcase your personal style, from contemporary to traditional, by choosing a new rug for your home.

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Nowell’s Contemporary Furniture

Recommended by Stacey Swecker of An Hour With Stacey, $498

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Bautista Interiors at The Shops of Baileywick, $50

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Affordable Chic Shops, $450 SoHo Consignments, $412

Affordable Chic Shops Wander With Wonder at The Shops of Baileywick, $106 Eatmans Carpets & Interiors, $1,199

Recommended by Interior Harmony, $5,610 53 midtownmag.com|

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Robert Fritz Oriental Rugs, Inc. Retail price: $5,200.

Recommended by Interior Harmony, $529.

Robert Fritz Oriental Rugs, Inc. Retail price: $7,200

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9.

& QA

We asked rug expert Bob Fritz, owner of Robert Fritz Oriental Rugs for suggestions on selecting, caring for and cleaning rugs.

Midtown Magazine: Are there any guidelines related to how much hardwood should be visible around the rug? Bob Fritz: With the beauty and variety in hardwood and other solid surface flooring today, many homeowners can be hesitant about covering up too much floor. If one larger rug is chosen for a room, the guidelines are to leave 18 to 24 inches of floor exposed around the rug. MM: If it is a new home and you haven’t chosen colors or furniture, what should you pick first for a room? BF: I suggest researching different room design and colors in popular home magazines. Homeowners will often say “I want my room to look like this,” and then we have the inspiration of how to proceed. It’s okay to go fabric shopping to find the right palette for the desired look. But choose the rug first, and then finalize all fabrics, paint colors and window treatments. This will yield the very best outcome. MM: Can you mix traditional and contemporary rugs in a room? BF: This always depends on how eclectic one wants to be in the décor. It’s a good idea to begin with a vision of what the room or adjoining rooms should look like. Using traditional styles with transitional or even more contemporary ones can work effectively if the color palettes in the different styles are compatible; even if quite different. MM: How should rugs be cared for and cleaned? BF: Rugs should be vacuumed regularly. Sand and grit work down to the base of the pile, then with traffic these particles can cut the wool and contribute to a loss of pile. When a rug should be cleaned depends on its location in the home and the traffic it receives. Rugs at

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or adjoining exterior doors often receive more traffic and are exposed to more soil and grit than rugs in interior rooms, especially ones not used that often. A rug should be cleaned if it appears soiled and has built-up dirt and grit. Rugs should never be “dry” or “steam” cleaned, and never cleaned in your home. Surface shampooing of a rug will not clean it. This will only brighten the surface, while the shampoo residue and dirt remain in the rug. Cleaning a handmade area rug involves a great deal of work and special equipment. Rely only on a professional with knowledge of rugs and extensive experience in cleaning them. MM: What to do about spots, spills or animal stains? BF: If food or liquid is spilled on a rug, clean the area affected as soon as possible. First, using absorbent paper towels, pick up and dry the spill; then use liberal amounts of club soda to flush the area and then dry with a clean terrycloth towel. Do not use popular spot cleaners because these may affect the dyes and cause noticeable discoloration. Animal urine is very damaging to rugs. Because animals tend to go to the same area of a rug repeatedly, this can cause dry rot, permanent staining and alteration of the dyes. Professional rug cleaners can remove urine prior to cleaning, usually by excess soaking and rinsing. MM: What are other tips to care for rugs? BF: A good pad designed for area rugs will make the rug feel more plush and will add to the life of the rug by reducing the abrasive effects of grit. Rotating a rug 180 degrees every year or so will help minimize wear from traffic patterns and the possible effects of direct sunlight. Any rug or other furniture will fade if exposed to full sunlight.

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What’s

in

By Christa Gala Photography by Heather Swanner Product photography by Jennifer Robertson

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a. tried and true B . t o t a l ly t r e n d y c. all worn out D. h i g h q ua l i t y E. all of the above Be honest. Did you pick E? Many of us have a conglomeration of clothing, eighty percent of which we don’t wear because, well, we just don’t love a lot of what we own.

‘The thrill of the hunt’ Clothing shouldn’t be disposable – at least that’s the idea behind resale vintage shops, which carry high quality brand-name styles from both today and decades past. Two ideas we should keep in mind when shopping for anything anywhere: buy high quality pieces you truly love. Although vintage and resale clothing and accessories shops have gained momentum in the past five years or so locally, they’ve been around worldwide for a lot longer. National photostylist and Midtown Magazine fashion stylist Elie Rossetti Serraino (pictured left) was born and raised in Milan, Italy, where she started going to shops with her mom as a teen. “In Milan you have this unbelievable resale market because there is so much fashion and so much sampling right off of the runways,” says Serraino. “There was a weekly market in downtown Milan with big bins of beautiful designer clothing for five or ten bucks. You could find furs for literally just a few dollars. It was for the young students. It wasn’t a chic thing to do yet. Now it’s actually the thrill of the hunt. It’s a competition of who finds the greatest and cheapest things at the vintage stores.”

Salvatore Ferragamo Vigogna Nappa Calf Nora and Nicky’s Designer Resale

Jimmy Choo tan pumps ADORE Designer Resale Boutique

Chanel Revolver Consignment Boutique

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Chanel Bag ADORE Designer Resale Boutique

Art Deco purse Revolver Consignment Boutique

Kate Spade Bag Nora and Nicky’s Designer Resale

A few tips So what’s the best way to utilize vintage shops when it comes to filling out your wardrobe? “Honestly, checking in often is the best way, for things sometimes come in and sell quite quickly,” says Nancy Alinovi, owner of ADORE Designer Resale Boutique, with locations in both Cary and Raleigh. “For a shopper like myself, I feel I miss out if I don’t visit often. Also, things that you might have passed by before sometimes look better when they hit the sale rack. I personally will sometimes see things on our $9.99 or $3.99 rack

Taffeta Banana Republic skirt ADORE Designer Resale Boutique

Nanette Lepore skirt Revolver Consignment Boutique

that I cannot believe made it there; truly major labels.” Cathy J. Brooks, owner of Nora and Nicky’s Designer Resale, shared these insider tips: • Find a good consignment store by searching near affluent, fashion-forward neighborhoods. • A good store will be bright and clean, with helpful staff. • The best time to buy is now; here today, gone tomorrow. • The best bargains are usually on the most expensive pieces. • Look for core pieces, such as a Calvin Klein, which you can build upon. • Shop by feel; you’ll appreciate the better fabrics. A piece of advice from Serraino, too: Try before you buy. “Vintage stores sometimes won’t allow returns or exchanges, so take the time to try on,” she says. And don’t be too quick to pass on something because of its labeled size. Vintage shopping is a little different. “A size four/six from the eighties or England, and you’re a two, it might fit you. You never know.”

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ue

Burberry short kilt Nora and Nicky’s Designer Resale

In fact, Jennifer Gordon, store manager of Revolver Consignment Boutique in Glenwood South, says discarding interesting possibilities is one of her customers’ biggest mistakes: “Just because it doesn’t look good on a hanger or maybe that style didn’t fit you in the past doesn’t mean it won’t look good on you today.”

Deals you’ll die for Serraino often shops vintage stores, as well as traditional retail shops and boutiques, for her work in print advertising, photo shoots and movie costuming. She can often buy something cheaper at a vintage shop in Raleigh than she can rent at a costume shop in New York or Los Angeles. As a general rule, you can get up to 70 percent off retail in a vintage store. As Brooks points out, though, sometimes the steepest discounts are found on the most expensive items, so vintage shopping is not thrift shopping. Still, Serraino has found deals in all price ranges, including a pair of Ferragamo flats for $4 and a vintage Gucci tote from the eighties for less than $300, which she saw a few weeks later on an Australian website for double that. Cathy J. Brooks has owned Nora and Nicky’s designer resale shop in Sutton Square for just six months, and it’s all she can do not to purchase inventory for herself. “One of my favorite deals was this light pink poncho from Burberry; it had the classic Burberry plaid over the pink,” says Brooks, who paid $125 for the poncho. “Another favorite of mine was a pair of fabulous Kate Spade boots in light beige

Gold ring, Chanel earrings ADORE Designer Resale Boutique

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St. John scarf Nora and Nicky’s Designer Resale Jennifer Gordon of Revolver says denim is huge – especially skinny jeans, which sell for between $12 and $50 per pair.

A beautiful collection of hats

ADORE Designer Resale Boutique

Revolver Consignment Boutique

Nora and Nicky’s Designer Resale

suede for $177. They were low-heeled with this fun and funky tie you could wrap up the leg in many different configurations.” Brooks’ latest find is a Prada handbag with amethyst accents that she bought for $377, compared to $1,800 retail. For Alinovi, sometimes the deals in her two ADORE stores surprise even her. “There have been some Dolce & Gabbana pieces that have slayed me – a $500 jacket that was brand new and gorgeous was recently in and out – and the vintage Thierry Mugler suits for $100 to $500 from the 80s are so killer; the quality of their tailoring is impeccable,” she says. “I also just personally bought a suede fringed cape that I could not resist for $38, and some black and gold Louboutin shoes for $175.” Gordon says Revolver has some fantastic deals on designer denim – from Joe’s to Paige. And don’t forget skinny jeans this year. “We’ve got really great deals on skinny jeans, which you can’t beat right now because they tuck into boots so nicely. They can range anywhere from about $12 to $50.” Not sure skinny jeans are your style? A major bonus to vintage shopping is that an exceptional bargain allows you to try something that might be totally out of your comfort zone, because you haven’t made an investment. Alinovi takes those chances herself. “I recently bought a pair of long plaid shorts, something I would never buy, for a few dollars that I might try with black tights and boots. If not, I’ll just end up wearing them at the beach with a sweatshirt.”

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Vintage hair pieces with birdcage veil and Prada collar Revolver Consignment Boutique

H o t l o o k s f o r c o l d w e at h e r So what’s selling these days? Gordon says her customers are clamoring for the “Mad Men” look, referring to the popular television series that features sixties garb, including slinky silk, swing dresses and an immaculate tailored look in dresses, suits and pants. “Everybody wants ‘Mad Men,’” Gordon says. “We have a lot of great vintage pieces that are actually from that time, and then a lot that are inspired by that time.” Also big: skinny belts, layers and accessories. Adds Alinovi of ADORE: “We always do well with high-end bags, and everyone seems to love them. Vintage Chanel sells well and now that Chanel has tripled its retail prices, and vintage and used prices have gone up as well, many people are seeking it out. “Quality vintage has been selling very well – our collection of it has been growing – and we have also sold many vintage hats at the Raleigh store,” Alinovi continues. Brooks is seeing the same thing at her store:

Consider donning the “Mad Men” look featuring slinky silk, swing dresses and a tailored look from the sixties.

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Silk Etro shirt ADORE Designer Resale Boutique

Missoni for Saks Fifth Avenue Nora and Nicky’s Designer Resale

Nuvula Shirt Revolver Consignment Boutique

“I have a vintage hat collection that decorates my boutique, and I constantly have women who wish to purchase them, but they’re only for display.” Says Alinovi: “I think the main thing is, people are appreciating fashion a bit more and using it to perk themselves up in this economy, and so come to us to find a large variety and one-of-a-kind items.” Serraino says anything with fur will be big this winter and into spring; consider putting a vintage fur collar on a new coat. And bling is still in the forecast. “Anything that is sequin-encrusted or crystals from the 80s, or even the 50s and 60s, is beautiful now,” says Serraino.” Bows are big as well on everything from gowns to shoes. Brooches, French-inspired hats, earrings from the 70s shaped like flowers and tiny purses – all things Serraino is looking for in her work now.

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nora and nicky’s designer resale

Also very big this season: capes and ponchos. Cardigans and jackets are also great ways to add a layer of fashion-forward warmth. “Don’t be afraid to layer,” says Gordon of Revolver. “You can take pieces that won’t stand alone and really make some pop by adding the right layers and accessories.” When it comes to colors, expect to see a lot of green and blue used in interesting ways. “You can put together some unusual combinations – maybe a camel with a teal or a bright neon orange with a teal,” says Serraino. Brooks is seeing an increase in sales for quality goods in all areas. “I’m also seeing a return to ladylike looks, especially in handbags and shoes,” she says. “Another popular purchase has been boots – high-heeled, low-heeled or wedge. It doesn’t matter; they’re hot.”

Go! If you hit the vintage trails in the coming months, whether you’re looking for brand names or just funky things from decades past, keep an open mind, says Serraino. “Go in there thinking, ‘I’m going to find a little treasure,’ not necessarily an outfit from head to toe,” she says. “If it’s something you really like, use it as a starting point. Maybe you find a really interesting pair of shoes and then you can go to another store and find the perfect dress. Just go with an idea to find something interesting.” And go with friends. “When I go with my girlfriends, we all try on things and it’s both fun and funny, sometimes,” says Serraino. “It’s more fun than just going by myself.” It’s true; you’re going to want someone to reminisce with, because these vintage styles can really take you back.

wm a lewis vintage black jacket adore designer resale Boutique

chester weinberg sequin dress revolver consignment Boutique

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PEPPERMINT KISSES

CRANBERRY CRINKLE COOKIES

oven

holiday lovin’ from the

RECIPES BY CHEF MARIO COPY BY DARCY BRENNAN-HUANTE PHOTOGRAPHY BY APRIL MANESS PHOTOGRAPHY

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CRANBERRY CRINKLE COOKIES Approximately 2 dozen

PEANUT BUTTER, BACON AND CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES Approximately 2 dozen

Ingredients 3/4 cup all-purpose flour 3/4 cup sugar 1 tsp baking powder 1/2 tsp salt 4 Tbsp butter 1/3 cup cocoa powder 1 egg 1 tsp instant coffee mixed with 2 Tbsp hot water 1/2 tsp vanilla 1/3 cup chocolate chips 1/3 cup dried cranberries 1 cup powdered sugar Directions Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Mix together flour, sugar, baking powder and salt, then set aside. Place butter in a microwave safe bowl and melt. Add cocoa powder to butter and whisk until smooth. Add egg, coffee mixture and vanilla to butter mixture and mix well. Stir flour mixture into butter mixture until combined. Fold in the chocolate chips and cranberries. Divide dough into walnu-sized balls. Roll balls into powdered sugar twice. Arrange them 2 inches apart on a parchment-lined cookie sheet. Bake for 10-12 minutes or until cookies look cracked but are still soft. Cool.

n

Ingredients 3/4 cup peanut butter 2 sticks butter 2 3/4 cups brown sugar 1 egg 1 Tbsp vanilla 2 1/2 cups flour 1 tsp salt 1 tsp baking soda 1 cup chocolate chips 1 cup chopped cooked bacon Directions In a bowl add together flour, salt and baking soda. Mix well and set aside. In a mixer, cream together peanut butter, softened butter and brown sugar until light and fluffy, 3 minutes. Crack the egg into a container (try not to break the yolk) and add vanilla. Pour egg into sugar mixture (if doing a larger batch, add the eggs one at a time), mixing well after each addition (scrape bowl often). Then add the flour mixture and mix on low until smooth. Add the chocolate chips and bacon and then mix until everything is combined. Drop scooped dough onto sheet pan close together, then wrap and store in fridge. To bake: Place cookie scoops on an ungreased parchment-lined sheet pan. Bake at 350 degrees 4 minutes, turn and then another 4 minutes. Cool.

Ingredients 3 egg whites 1/4 tsp cream of tartar 1/4 tsp peppermint extract 1/8 tsp salt 3/4 cup sugar

Ingredients 3/4 cup butter, softened 1/2 cup sugar 1 tsp baking powder 1 egg 1 tsp vanilla 1 cup cornmeal 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour 1 cup pistachio nuts, whole 2 tsp lemon zest 8 oz chocolate chips 1 tsp shortening 1/2 cup pistachio nuts, chopped

Directions Preheat oven to 200 degrees. Line a cookie sheet with parchment paper. In a mixing bowl, combine egg whites, cream of tartar, peppermint extract and salt with an electric mixer on a medium setting. Beat mixture until you have soft peaks, then gradually add the sugar while continuing to beat on high speed until you get stiff peaks. Fit a pastry bag with a star-shaped tip. With a small paintbrush, paint lines of red food coloring on the inside of the pastry bag. Carefully scoop the merengue into the pastry bag and pipe stars the size of walnuts about 2 inches apart on the lined cookie sheet. Bake meringues for about 1 1/2 hours or until they feel dry when lightly touched. Allow to cool and enjoy!

Directions Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Place the butter, sugar and baking powder in a large bowl and cream together with an electric mixer, until light and fluffy. Add the egg and vanilla and beat until combined. Mix in the cornmeal, flour, 1 cup pistachio nuts and lemon zest. Mix together until you have a dough. Divide dough into 3 equal portions. Form each portion into a loaf shape and flatten slightly. Place loaves on a parchment-lined cookie sheet, about 2 inches apart. Bake in oven for about 20 minutes, then take out and allow to cool for about an hour. Take each loaf and slice into 1/2 thick cookies. Place cookies flat on a parchment lined sheet pan and bake for about 6 minutes. Flip the cookies over and bake for another 6 minutes, or until lightly golden. Then take out of oven and allow to cool. On the top of a double boiler, melt chocolate and shortening together. Dip each cookie in the chocolate mixture and then in chopped pistachio mix. Let set and then enjoy!

PEPPERMINT KISSES Approximately 2 dozen

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LEMON PISTACHIO BISCOTTI

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When the story broke that Tennessee women’s basketball coach Pat Summit had early onset dementia, the news networks went reeling. And for those of us at home, listening to her son state that one of the warnings was that she went from misplacing her keys once a day to three times a day, well, we took a big gulp and thought, “uh-oh”.

The fact is many of us misplace our keys on a regular basis. I do it so often that when I actually find my keys in the spot they’re supposed to be, I’m genuinely surprised. And I know I’m not alone in my forgetfulness. An informal survey of both my male and female friends found that many of us often forget the name of the person we just met, the title of the movie we saw on our last date night, where we parked the car and whether or not we turned off the stove. Many of us leave sticky notes on the bathroom sink and the fridge reminding us about an early meeting and even though we sometimes make lists for our lists, we still forget to grab that extra gallon of milk at the store. One friend confessed to only remembering that she’d forgotten to serve the broccoli she’d prepared with midtownmag.com| xx 71

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10

Tips to Remember Better

Dr. Peterson offers the following tips to help us remember better: 1 Exercise your brain: Doing puzzles and playing games are helpful, but it’s even better to engage your brain with new activities. Challenge yourself to learn a new skill or relearn something you first did 20 years ago. 2 Exercise your body.

5 Create designated spots for objects. 6 When learning new information, use associations (facts, songs, or names) to help you remember. 7 Limit alcohol and do not smoke. 8 Spend time with family and friends.

3 Feed your body well. Eat a natural diet, full of fruits and vegetables, and stay away from processed food.* 4 Get organized! Use memory tools such as calendars, notes and lists.

9 Stay involved with your community. 10 Get lots of rest.

*Supplements are not proven to improve your memory and should only be taken baileywick_nd.pdf 10/7/11 area 4:58:26 if youshops are ofdefi cient in a particular asPMdetermined by your physician.

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dinner upon discovering it the following morning, when she opened the microwave door to heat up breakfast. And it seems that the older we get, the more frequently our brain seems to lapse, making us wonder, is what we are experiencing normal? the Age FACtor The answer is yes. Age-related memory loss is not only normal, but it is to be expected. And though it’s easy for us to acknowledge that the body ages – those extra few pounds, those wrinkles and that thinning hair make it hard for us to miss – it can be more difficult to accept that our brain also changes. “As we age, we lose brain cells and experience age appropriate atrophy,� says Dr. Paul C. Peterson of Duke Neurology Raleigh. “We still form memories and new connections, but the process of remembering is slower.� While there is no hard and fast rule as to when our slowing down may occur, Peterson says that generally, we see the first shifts between the ages of 40 and 50. We then may see another decrease during the next decade, between the ages of 50 and 60. So, if we’re thinking about enrolling in a college course, be prepared. It will likely take us more time to process the information than the average 20year-old sitting beside us.

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All Forgetfulness is Not Created Equal The key is recognizing when this slowing down is occurring at a much higher rate than what is considered normal. “It is normal to have a lapse when you forget someone’s name or something you were supposed to do, and then, remember it later on,” says Dr. Peterson. “It’s when a person is having trouble recalling information, forgetting things that they should know how to do, or asking for the same information over and over that there is cause for concern.” Let’s say, for example, I’m getting ready to leave the house with my husband when I realize that I have once again, misplaced my keys. With normal memory loss, I would retrace my steps, searching for them. And even if I received a phone call in the middle of my search and got temporarily distracted, ideally, upon hanging up, I should be able to recall what I was doing in the first place – searching for my keys so I could leave the house. But, if I was struggling with a more serious type of memory loss, I may forget to continue my search for the keys once hanging up the telephone. I may begin doing something completely unrelated, such as picking up the book I’ve been reading. And when my husband asks me what I’m doing, I would not recall that I had been both searching for my keys and planning on going out. While the above example could be indicative of early onset dementia, Dr. Peterson cautions against jumping to any conclusions. “There are dozens of reasons why you can have memory loss, including infections, brain cancer, medications and depression,” says Dr. Peterson. “And with early onset dementia, it’s not just forgetfulness. There may also be lack of concentration, a language dysfunction that involves more than forgetting a word, impaired judgment, behavior changes, and an inability to take care of daily activities.” The bottom line is that if we’re concerned, or someone that knows us well (a spouse, child, or caregiver) is concerned, it makes sense to see your physician.

“It’s when a person is having trouble recalling information, forgetting things that they should know how to do, or asking for the same information over and over that there is cause for concern.”

The Focus Factor So what about my friend who left her broccoli in the microwave overnight? She didn’t remember it was in there until the next morning, when she ended up staring straight at it as she went to pop in the sausage. Should she be concerned? midtownmag.com| 65

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The answer is no. For once she discovered the broccoli, she immediately knew why she had forgotten about it. “I had turned the sound option off on the microwave when we had guests, so it wouldn’t be noisy. Without the bell, I didn’t think about the cooking cycle being over,” she says. “And, when the broccoli was cooking, I headed off to multitask, doing emails and such.” The key word in that sentence is multitask. The truth is, while it can be considered a gift to juggle multiple tasks at the same time, it also contributes to our forgetfulness. “Temporary memory lapses, especially those in our recent memories, can be made worse by distraction,” says Dr. Peterson. “And it can be even more challenging with age.” Consider that our memory works like a filing cabinet. First, our brain registers new information. Then, it gets filed away. However, if we don’t file properly because we aren’t focusing our full attention on what we’re doing – we put our cell phone down but don’t notice where we placed it, we impulsively leave the kitchen to take care of something in the garage, we look at a text message while the receptionist tells us our new appointment time, we’re preoccupied by bad news when someone is talking to us or we’re simply bored during a conversation – recent information may not get stored. Therefore, when we go to retrieve it, it’s just not in there. Remember Better Fortunately, with just a little effort, we can improve our memories. An easy first step is making an effort to pay attention. “When talking with someone, practice active listening by concentrating on what is being said,” recommends Dr. Peterson. And when it comes to completing even the tiniest of tasks, take the time to devote our attention to what we’re doing at that moment. While we can’t fight Father Time, making positive lifestyle changes can also help us to remember better. Staying active, eating a healthy diet, getting organized and challenging our brains are just a few ways we can help keep our memory strong. And if you’re worried about forgetting these tips, relax. Just turn back a few pages. We’ve written them down for you.

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THE

longterm GIFT Even in the healthiest of people, shortterm and recent memory are the two types of memory most likely to challenge us as we age. In contrast, our long-term memory is most likely to remain intact, making the centenarians among us walking and talking history books, connecting our past and present. If you’re not convinced, meet Eva Reynolds, who recently celebrated her 103rd birthday. “Her short-term memory is not as great as it once was, but her long-term memory is absolutely amazing,” says her daughter, Barbara Valentine. It’s so strong that almost 13 years ago, when Reynolds was 90 years Barbara Valentine with her 103 year-old old, the two worked together to create an mother, Eva reynolds. oral history, taking them back to 1908. Reynolds doesn’t take any medication, nor does she use a walker or wheelchair. While her hearing isn’t as sharp as it used to be, cognitively, she’s 100 percent present, still embracing her love for people. So does Reynolds have any secrets to her longevity that she’s willing to share? She has never drank or smoked, and has always eaten fresh foods. Sure, they may have been made with a little lard (hey, she’s a true Southern lady at heart), but there have never been any chemicals in her diet. As a young high school graduate, she was highly motivated to become a teacher. When she didn’t have the opportunity to attend college, she instead channeled her energy and talents into teaching and learning throughout the years, whether it was teaching Sunday school or taking on various projects and crafts. Enjoying being physically active, Reynolds has always been the type of woman who could be found outside, enjoying nature. “When my now 47-year-old son was a child, she would take him fishing off the pier at Topsail Island,” remembers Valentine. “She’d be the grandmother digging for worms.” Even today, when the mood strikes her, Reynolds can sit down at the piano and bang out a hymn, which she learned how to play without any formal training. Perhaps Reynolds’ most important virtue has been her natural spark for life. “My mother has always been strong-willed and outgoing, a force to be reckoned with, never sitting still for too long,” says Valentine. Perhaps we’d all be smart to give that a try.

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bain’s beat

THE TREASON FOR THE SEASON

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everal years ago, I had the honor of opening a meeting for an organization I admire. It was mid-December, so I started with, “Happy Holidays, everyone!” Before I could say more, a grumpy-sounding retort rang out from someone in the audience: “Merry CHRISTMAS!” Two things struck me about this. First – three words was a new record for how quickly I get heckled during a speech. Second – Grumpy wasn’t answering me, he was correcting me. To which I can only respond, spare me. I have nothing against the phrase “Merry Christmas” – in fact, I say it a lot – so please don’t bust my chops on those occasions when I don’t. There were nonChristians at the meeting; in deference to them, I kept my greeting generic. That’s all. I wasn’t rebelling, or trying to make a point, or taking part in the alleged War on Christmas; I was just trying to make sure everyone felt welcome. Does that attitude really fly in the face of Christianity? I certainly hope not. This is probably the best time for a couple of disclaimers, to avoid losing what few of you are still reading. 1. I’m not criticizing Christmas, Christianity or Christians in general, as I happen to be one. Of course, I don’t belong to an

organized religion; rather, I’m Episcopalian. Some folks really believe that, but they don’t understand Episcopalianism. It’s too rare around here. If you gathered 100 random citizens, you’d be hard-pressed to find four Episcopalians. But that’s okay – wherever there are four of us, you’ll probably find a fifth. (Maybe that’s it – maybe the drinking makes people think we’re not Christians.) I can only imagine what critics would say if they knew I’m also a recovering Catholic; I bet Grumpy would have heckled me even sooner. 2. I don’t condone haphazardly replacing the word “Christmas” with “Holiday.” Phrases like “holiday tree” and “holiday carol” just sound stupid; we can call those things what they’ve always been called and still not be guilty of forcing our religion on someone. The only thing I’m defending is the use of the phrases, “Happy Holidays” and “Season’s Greetings.” I love Christmas, and am not attempting to minimize it in any way when I choose not to say, “Merry Christmas.” But there are organizations and individuals who loathe those phrases, even to the point of boycotting businesses who use them in advertising. One example is the American Family Association (AFA), perpetrator of what I like to call, “Mary’s Boycott.” They publish an annual “Naughty or Nice?” list of retailers (ironic that they use Santa references while insisting that others refer only to Christ). Each company on the list is categorized, based on the number of times the word “Christmas”

appears in its seasonal advertising. Those companies that don’t measure up are considered to be anti-Christmas, and AFA urges their supporters to boycott them. Yep, they feel so strongly about forcing other people to pay homage to their holiday exclusively, that they’re willing to engage in financial terrorism. Is it just me, or is that evil? During times of economic downturn and record unemployment, trying to run someone out of business is tantamount to treason, and I hate that they claim Jesus as the reason for their treason. They’ve boycotted Gap multiple times, culminating in 2009, when the company agreed to add the word “Christmas” to its advertising. Gap released an ad with dancers chanting, “Go Christmas!” Too bad they also chanted, “Go Solstice,” prompting AFA to keep the boycott in place and claim, “Gap compares Christmas to the pagan holiday.” (How does the word “go” imply a comparison?) After Gap promised to develop an ad campaign with a “strong Christmas theme,” AFA ended the boycott, but guess what? Gap’s margins have continued to decline, prompting the company to announce plans to close one third of its American stores by the end of 2012. I’m not saying AFA’s boycott was responsible, but if it was, I hope they sleep well this Christmas, knowing that their supposedly faith-fueled actions have ensured that thousands of people will be unemployed before the next holiday season comes around. But as their former chairman, Don Wildmon, said about people being offended, “Tough luck...this is an overwhelmingly Christian country.” I think we all know what this

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guy is full of, and it ain’t the Holy Spirit. If he can’t see anything inherently wrong with boycotting businesses that don’t celebrate Christmas, he needs to Google “Germany April 1933.” Other groups and individuals agree with Wildmon, saying an attempt to avoid offending non-Christians is a ridiculous attempt at being politically correct. But if being PC means giving in to an unreasonable demand to avoid a term because it offends people, what does that imply about their demand that we avoid saying “Happy Holidays” because it offends them? “Happy Holidays” is inclusive, and anyone who feels Christmas is minimized by the mere acknowledgement of other holidays, is pretty insecure in their faith. It’s nothing more than common courtesy, and is that such a bad thing? Not to this Christian. And not, I would hope, to Christ. He was known for humility; do you really think He would want AFA making such an uproar? Also, the phrase has been around as long as I can remember, and I’m old enough to have predated political correctness. It’s actually the title of a popular Christmas song composed in 1942 (well before the PC movement) by Mr. White Christmas himself, Irving Berlin. Timing is another reason I opt for “Happy Holidays.” Starting around December 21st or so, I’ll say “Merry Christmas” and nothing else; any earlier, and it’s too soon to be specific about the day itself. If “Merry Christmas” refers to the date of December 25th, then it’s okay to wait until that date is closer to say it (after all, you wouldn’t wish someone a Happy Thanksgiving on November 1st). But if “Merry Christmas” refers to the season as a whole, then that pretty much validates use of the phrase, “Season’s Greetings.” One more reason I say “Happy Holidays” is, I’m referring to numerous dates, not just Christmas Day itself. Even if one subscribes to the chest-and Bible-thumping view that we should acknowledge only the days that Christians can celebrate, that’s still a long list. In that light, “Happy Holidays” means nothing more insidious than, “I hope you have a happy, merry and/or blessed Thanksgiving, Advent, St. Nicholas Day, Feast of the Immaculate Conception, St. Lucia Day, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, St. Stephen Day, Boxing Day, Kwanzaa (no, it doesn’t contradict or replace Christmas), Feast of the Holy Innocents, New Year’s Eve, New Year’s Day, Solemnity of Mary, Feast of St. Basil, and Epiphany.” Can you really blame those of us who boil it down to two words? Look, we own the season; everybody knows it. Do we have to be so insecure about it? We lose nothing by saying, “Happy Holidays.” And Christmas isn’t going anywhere. Even the Grinch knew that: “Maybe Christmas…perhaps… means a little bit more.” Dan Bain, Happy Holidays – Little Drummer Boy(cotted) every one. mail@danbain.net

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HOLIDAY touches for your home

Guest Room for the

A tiny sparkling tree by the bed! Affordable Chic

Your guests will feel like VIPs with red roses by the bed. English Garden

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s

Your home is ready for the holidays – the tree is trimmed, the lights are twinkling in each window and your wreath is hung. But are you finished? What about your powder room, guest room or guest bath? Little holiday touches in these rooms will offer family and friends warmth and cheer this holiday season. Our shops and designers share simple holiday touches.

Place a colorful holiday dish of chocolates or snacks for guests to enjoy while unpacking. Awesome Abode – Shops of Baileywick

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A holiday nightlight is the perfect touch for your little guests. Affordable Chic

A mercury glass candle lit adds a cozy romantic touch for visiting couples. Awesome Abode – Shops of Baileywick midtownmag.com| 71

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Guest Bath for the

Holiday tea towels add an elegant or whimsical touch. Qunitessentials zest_nd.pdf 9/20/11

3:10:12 PM

A moss wreath hung with colorful ribbon from the bath’s curtain rod is a great and simple holiday touch. Awesome Abode – Shops of Baileywick

Lovely pear-shaped candles on a silver tray add holiday color and fragrance. Affordable Chic

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Add a “starry” look with constellation napkin rings.

Dining for

from Quintessentials

New gold dessert plates will ensure that your decadent dessert is dinner’s most memorable moment.

Add a little sparkle with new Kim Seybert placemats.

Add a beautiful Julia Knight holiday bowl with soaps or chocolates.

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in the Sex in the City movie.

painting with

blue

From light and airy to deep and mysterious... they are all beautiful. Our designers share their favorite shades of blue.

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I like... Benjamin Moore “Fairy Tale Blue”. Pair it with a bright white, tan or black. ~ Betty Eatman, Eatman’s Carpets & Interiors

I like... Behr Ultra “Twilight Chimes”. Pair it with Behr “Silver Screen”, a crisp white trim and a sparkly chandelier to make a great dining room combo! ~ Sarah Stauffer, Interior Harmony

tip

I like... Sherwin Williams “Riverway”. It’s my favorite blue for the Chessington Community ~ Amanda Moody, Ashton Woods

Over a larger surface area, most colors appear darker. It’s a good idea to choose colors a shade or two lighter than what you want. Clean, bright colors can appear either lighter or darker depending on the surrounding colors and lighting in the room.

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tip I like... Benjamin Moore “Chicago Blue”. It is rich but does not get as dark as the midnight or cobalt blues. Pair it with Benjamin Moore “Windham Cream” or in fall add Benjamin Moore “Orange Blossom”; or at Christmas send in the reds with Benjamin Moore “Strawberry Red” accents. ~ Sandy Maccioli, Shops of Baileywick (Awesome Abode)

It is customary to paint ceilings white or off-white. This creates the illusion of higher ceilings and a more open space. Medium to dark colors will create the illusion of lowering the ceiling, which can create a cozy look if the ceiling is higher than usual. With normal height ceilings, medium and dark colors could close in the area too much, creating a cave-like appearance.

I like... Benjamin Moore “Electric Blue”. If this color looks familiar, it is the blue used in Carrie Bradshaw’s remodeled apartment in the Sex and the City movie. Pair it with almost every color of the color spectrum. ~ Stacey Swecker, An Hour with Stacy

I like... Porter Paint’s “Scandinavian Sky”. It’s a great background color. Pair it with: wood furniture, creams and greens ~ Kathy Mitchell Hunt & Gather matrix_nd.pdf 10/6/11 12:28:18 PM

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I like... Restoration Hardware “Silver Sage”. Pair it with an espresso or white. ~ Stephanie Cothran Kitchen & Bath Galleries

I like... Benjamin Moore “Santorini Blue” or “Woodlawn Blue”. Fresh, crisp, current, and versatile. ~ Van Fletcher, Broker/Realtor – Oaks at Fallon Park/ Allen Tate Company

tip

Working in three-foot square sections, applying the paint in a zigzag “M” or “W” pattern and then filling in the pattern will reduce the likelihood of splattering.

I like... Sherwin Williams “Secure Blue”. It’s great for one room, but not the whole house. Pair it with Sherwin Williams “Extra White” or “Ivoire”. ~ Sally Johns, Affordable Chic 78 | midtownmag.com

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Q&A

the

with

painting You’ve chosen your favorite shade of blue, but what about the finish? It is said the right finish brings magic to the color! We asked Ryan Critoria, owner of Matrix Painting, to share his thoughts on blues and finishes. Midtown Magazine: We are featuring great shades of blue in this article – are there any special considerations for painting blues? Ryan Critoria: There are two main things to consider when working with blue shades. First, blues have the ability to change tones depending upon the room’s lighting. I recommend trying out a test sample on the area of the room that receives the most natural light and viewing it during various times of the day. Secondly, the blue shade’s temperature will vary depending on the surrounding colors of the room. MM: I read recently that some decorators recommend using high gloss on the walls and trim. Can you tell me which finishes you recommend for walls and interior trim? RC: Flat/Mattes are great for adult bedrooms, dining rooms and formal areas. They are great for concealing imperfections and can easily be touched up. Satin/Eggshells are ideal for high traffic areas such as hallways, family rooms and children’s bedrooms. They’re also perfect for the high moisture areas of the house: kitchens, bathrooms

pro and utility areas. In general it’s great for homes with children. Semi-Gloss/Glosses give a very hard and shiny finish that are perfect for all trim, doors, and any area that gets cleaned frequently. MM: How many coats of paint should you plan on when painting blues? RC: This might seem like a fairly straightforward question to answer, but there really are a lot of factors to be considered. As a general rule, one primer coat and two top coats should always cover. MM: What is the best way to clean a painted wall? RC: If the wall was recently painted, wait at least two weeks before washing it. After that, clean with a mild household detergent and a soft cloth or sponge. MM: Is there any additional advice you can share? RC: Always try out an actual test sample on the wall before painting. A certain color might look nice on a fan deck, and turn out hideous on a 10'x10' wall. Proper prep work is 80 percent of a great paint job. You can use the most expensive paint on the market, but if the prep work isn’t done right then the final product won’t be right. midtownmag.com| xx

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THE

END OF AN

BY ILLYSE LANE

F

ERA

or the past twenty years, Jennifer Huggard has ensured that the women of Raleigh don’t become fashion victims. As the owner of Tyler House, it’s a role she has thrived upon. “We’ve always been true to our original mission of bringing our customers into what’s going on in fashion in a way that will fit their lifestyle,” says Huggard. But a few months ago, Huggard realized she was at a crossroads. She knew it was time to consider renewing her lease. Yet she recognized her inner voice was talking, tugging at her

After 45 years, Tyler House prepares to say goodbye.

to make a change. And the fact is, Huggard learned a long time ago to trust that voice. It was the reason she ended up as owner of Tyler House in the first place. COMING HOME TO TYLER HOUSE Huggard took ownership back in 1991, when only a year earlier, she had popped in to visit Runyon and Betsy Tyler, who opened the shop back in 1967 as one of the original tenants in the old, enclosed North Hills Mall. Huggard had worked at Tyler House while in college and left upon graduating to pursue a career in fashion, focusing on retail and wholesale. After many years of living between New York and Raleigh, handling 13 states for some of the biggest names in the business, she decided to return

home and re-evaluate. Coincidentally, during that same time, Tyler House was preparing to move to Cameron Village. Mr. Tyler offered Huggard a part-time position while she decided her next step. Within a few months, part-time turned to full-time buyer, and within the year, Huggard began discussions to buy the retail shop. The rest, as they say, is history. COMING HOME TO NORTH HILLS A few years later, when approached about relocating the store to a soonto-be-redeveloped piece of real estate named The Lassiter at North Hills, Huggard was intrigued. “It was sort of serendipitous,” said she. “It was a chance to return to where we had started. I also felt it was the best-situated property around, and I liked the mixed use, with local store concentration. It was what I wanted in a location.” Tyler House reopened its doors just across the street from its original home, as one of the first three tenants to move into the new North Hills shopping destination

YOU ONLY HAVE TO LOOK AT AN OLD ADVERTISEMENT TO REALIZE HOW LONG TYLER HOUSE HAS BEEN DRESSING THE WOMEN OF RALEIGH.

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THE STOREFRONT OF THE ORIGINAL TYLER HOUSE, WHICH OPENED ITS DOORS IN 1967 IN NORTH HILLS MALL.

A FUNCTION OF TIMING Now customers are carrying a little bit of heartache, as Huggard is getting ready to embrace the next chapter of her life, closing the door on Tyler House. “Our newer customers tend to be most upset that the store is closing, for they have just found us and thought that Tyler House would be their shop,” says Huggard. “But the customers that have been with us for the long haul understand why I am doing this and are very supportive.” And why exactly is Huggard moving on? “It’s really been a function of timing. I have a 91-year-old mother-in-law, an 81-year-old father. My husband and I would like to travel; we’d also like to give back with our time,” says Huggard. “I knew if I made the commitment to renew my lease, the shop would have to come first. I really had to sit down and think about what I wanted my next five to ten years to be.” FASHION ADVICE TO LEAVE BEHIND As Huggard approaches these last few weeks, she’s most proud of being able to keep Tyler House relevant to what is happening in fashion, especially as the world seems to focus on targeting younger and younger customers. It’s what her customers have come to rely on, and what will be sorely missed. So what’s her parting fashion advice for her devoted fans? “I would say to stay modern. You don’t have to be trendy, just be connected to what is happening now, in all areas of your life,” says Huggard. “And the way we present ourselves is important, so pay attention to what your clothes say about you. Take pride in the way you look.” And maybe one day that little voice inside Huggard’s head will speak again and she’ll decide to come back.

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HUGGARD’S EYE FOR BUYING HAS LANDED HER MERCHANDISE ON THE COVER OF MIDTOWN MAGAZINE NUMEROUS TIME.

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&

calendar

NOVEMBER DECEMBER Interactive Cooking Classes Antonio’s Gourmet Market September 6, 13, 20, 27 I 7-9pm Lafayette Village I antoniosgourmetmarket.com

Raleigh Dance Theatre presents: Storybook Tales November 5-6 I 1 & 6pm, 3pm Progress Energy Center I www.raleighdance.org

“In the Spirit of Giving” Food Drive November 1-19 I Goldmine Jewelry Shoppe Bring in two cans of food and receive a free watch battery

Belk Charity Event Sale November 5 I 6-10am www.belk.com/charitysale

St. Timothy’s School Information Session Jr. K & K November 2-3 I 9:30-10:30am 4523 Six Forks Road I www.sttimothys.org 7th Annual “Visions of Sugarplums” Holiday Art and Gift Show November 3-5 I 9am-8pm, 9am-3pm Quail Hollow Swim Club www.visionsofsugarplumsraleigh.com Junior League of Raleigh – A Shopping Spree November 3-5 I Raleigh Convention Center www.ashoppingspree.org St. David’s School Open House November 3 I 7pm I 3400 White Oak Road www.sdsw.org

The Oxford – Guy Fawkes Night November 5 I 5-11pm I 319 Fayetteville Street www.oxfordraleigh.com “Take a Walk on the Luxurious Side” Charity Fashion Show November 5 I 7-9pm I Saks Fifth Avenue www.myselftogetheragain.org Affordable Chic Shops Christmas Open House November 5-6 I 10am-6pm, 1-5pm 2315 Lynn Road, Suite 106 www.affordablechicshops.com Top of the Triangle Fashion Show for Cystic Fibrosis Foundation November 9 I Saks Fifth Avenue

Saint-Jacques Cooking Class November 9 I 4:30pm Nora and Nicky’s Holiday Open House 6112 Falls of Neuse Road November 3 I 5-8pm I 6325 Falls of Neuse Road www.saintjacquesfrenchcuisine.com www.noraandnickys.com St. David’s School Middle/Upper Tours United Arts Council November 9 I 9:30am I 3400 White Oak Road “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner?” www.sdsw.org November 3-5 I www.unitedarts.org St. David’s School “Kindergarten: Ravenscroft School Tour Ready or Not” 6th-12th Grades November 10 I 10am I 3400 White Oak Road November 4, 15 I 9-11am www.sdsw.org 7409 Falls of Neuse Road I www.ravenscroft.org Primp Polishes Your Look at Dapper Style House November 10 I 5-8pm 317-113 West Morgan Street www.dapperstylehouse.com

2011

Ravenscroft School Tour PK-5th Grade November 10 I 9-11am 7409 Falls of Neuse Road I www.ravenscroft.org Hamilton Hill Double Feature Trunk Show November 11-12 I 11am-7pm, 11am-5pm 919.683.1474 I www.hamiltonhilljewelry.com Holiday Open House November 12-13 I 10am-6pm I 8724 Glenwood Avenue I www.huntandgathernc.com Revival Antiques Holiday Open House November 13 I 12-5pm 1505 Capital Boulevard I 919.833.3444 4th Annual Artists for Hope Show at Angus Barn November 13-14 I 1-8pm, 10-8pm 9401 Glenwood Avenue I www.walkforhope.com Shoebox Collection Center November 14-21 I 4815 Six Forks Road www.tbcraleigh.com St. David’s School Lower School Tour November 16 I 9:30am I 3400 White Oak Road www.sdsw.org Kristen’s Shoe Boutique Girls Night Out November 16 I 5-8pm I 2045 Renaissance Park Place, Cary I www.kristensshoes.com Vegan Cooking Class with Kathy Hester November 16 I Savory Spice Shop 8470 Honeycutt Road #108 I 919.900.8291 Saint Jacques Annual Beaujolais Wine Dinner November 17 I 6:30pm 6112 Falls of Neuse Road www.saintjacquesfrenchcuisine.com Women’s Club of Raleigh Antiques Show & Sale November 18-20 I Kerr Scott Building NC State Fairgrounds www.womansclubofraleigh.org Operation Christmas Child Packing Party November 19 I 9am I 4815 Six Forks Road www.tbcraleigh.com

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Holiday Open House Gigi’s Boutique Holiday Open House November 19-20 I 10-6pm December 3 I 10am-6pm I 7428 Creedmoor 1910 Bernard Street I www.huntandgathernc.com Road I www.shopgigisboutique.com Stravinsky: Concerto for Two Solo Pianos Cinderella November 23-27 I Raleigh Memorial Auditorium www.carolinaballet.com Hanging of the Greens Trinity Baptist November 27 I 6pm I 4815 Six Forks Road www.tbcraleigh.com

A Christmas Carol by Ira David Wood III December 3-4 I Durham Performing Arts Center Clothes Hound Holiday Open House December 10 I 10am-6pm www.theatreinthepark.com 8111 Creedmoor Road www.shopclotheshound.com Carolina Ballet – The Nutcracker December 3-4 I Memorial Hall I UNC Campus www.carolinaballet.com

Saint-Jacques Cooking Class Anna & Alice Holiday Party & December 6 I 4:30pm I 6112 Falls of Neuse DL1961 Trunk Show Road I www.saintjacquesfrenchcuisine.com December 1 I 10am-8pm I 8490 Honeycutt Road Lafayette Village I www.annaandalice.com Ravenscroft School Tour PK-5th Grades Charlottes Kenneth Jay Lane Trunk show December 6 I 9-11am I 7409 Falls of Neuse Road I www.ravenscroft.org December 1 I 10am-7pm I 919.787.7113 www.charlottesinc.com Kristen’s Shoe Boutique & Kristen’s Place Holiday Open House December 1 I 5-8pm 2045 Renaissance Park Place, Cary www.kristensshoes.com Cary Academy Holiday Shoppe December 1-3 I 10am-5pm 1500 Harrison Avenue www.caryacademy.org/holidayshoppe A Dapper Style House Presentation December 2 I 8-11pm 317-113 West Morgan Street www.dapperstylehouse.com Ravenscroft School Tour 6th-12th Grades December 2 I 9-11am 7409 Falls of Neuse Road I www.ravenscroft.org Hamilton Hill Jewelry – Bikakis & Johns/Humphrey Trunk Show December 2-4 I 11am-7pm, 11am-5pm, 1-5pm Brightleaf Square I www.hamiltonhilljewelry.com Diamonds Direct CRABTREE Holiday Extravaganza December 2-4 I 10am-8pm, 12-6pm 4401 Glenwood Avenue www.diamonds-direct.com

St. David’s School Middle/Upper Tours December 7 I 9:30am I 3400 White Oak Road www.sdsw.org Vermillion Carole Tanenbaum Vintage Jewelry Trunk Show December 7-8 I 4321-102 Lassiter at North Hills Avenue I www.vermillionstyle.com The Santaland Diaries December 8-11 I Theatre in the Park I Not intended for children I www.theatreinthepark.com

Carolina Ballet – The Nutcracker December 10-11 I Durham Performing Arts Center I www.carolinaballet.com Raleigh Roundup – Help Give Cancer the Boot December 11 I 7pm I Kerr Scott Building www.raleighroundup.com Raleigh Ringers Holiday Concert December 11 I 3pm I Meymandi Concert Hall www.rr.org Clothes Hound Holiday Open House December 10 I 10am-6pm I 8111 Creedmoor Road, #149 I www.shopclotheshound.com Carolina Ballet – The Nutcracker December 16-24 I Raleigh Memorial Auditorium www.carolinaballet.com

A Christmas Carol by Ira David Wood III December 8-11, 13-14 I Progress Energy Center Candlelight & Communion Service www.theatreinthepark.com at Trinity Baptist December 24 I 5 & 10pm I 4815 Six Forks Road Hamilton Hill Jewelry – www.tbcraleigh.com Antonio Bernardo/Majoral/ Michael Weggenmann Trunk Show Trinity Baptist Christmas Day Service December 9-11 I 11am-7pm, 11am-5pm, 1-5pm December 25 I 10:30am I 4815 Six Forks Road Brightleaf Square I www.hamiltonhilljewelry.com www.tbcraleigh.com Trollbeads Holiday Event – Glass Blowing Demo December 10 I 10:30am-4:30pm Goldmine Jewelry Shoppe

Saint-Jacques Prix Fixe New Years Eve Dinner December 31 I 6112 Falls of Neuse Road www.saintjacquesfrenchcuisine.com

Hope is Born: Emmanuel Trinity Baptist December 11 I 8:45am & 10:55am 4815 Six Forks Road I www.tbcraleigh.com

The Oxford New Years Eve Dinner & Party December 31 I 319 Fayetteville Street www.oxfordraleigh.com

Have an important event? We would love to hear about it. Please send the details of your calendar events to: gstephens@midtownmag.com.

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Raleigh Ringers Holiday Concert December 10 I 3 & 7:30pm Meymandi Concert Hall I www.rr.org

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VeRMILLIOn

forparty a photography: Johnny Widner photo StyliSt: elie rossetti serraino Model: Julie KrisKa , loCKe ManageMent

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AnnA & ALICe C A M e R O n C LO T H I n G C O.

g

Red C LO T H e s H O U n d

C H A R LO T T e ’ s

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MOnkee’s OF RALeIGH

everyone will be

green with

envy

gena chandler

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not

just

C . T. W e e k e n d s

photography: Johnny Widner Photo Stylist: Elie Rossetti Serraino M o d e l : J u l i e K r i s k a , LO C K E M a n a g e m e n t 88 | midtownmag.com

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any

little black

dress midtownmag.com| 89

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kRIsTen’s PLACe

Black dAPPeR sTYLe HOUse

GIGI’s BOUTIQUe

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ck

LO V e I n B LO O M

or

midnight

blue H AY L e Y ’ s B O U T I Q U e

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beauty

HOLIDAYGLAM in no time 1. false lashes DUO Eyelash Adhesive, $5.99 Nothing gives instant drama like full, fabulous lashes! I prefer individual flares – they are easy to put on and look more natural than a full strip of lashes. Tip: Use Duo lash glue to adhere lashes – give the glue about ten seconds to get tacky before applying. TO BUY: Available at local drugstores

2. bold lips

BEAUTY TIPS COURTESY OF FIQUET BAILEY SWAIN, LUXE BEAUTY BOUTIQUE liveloveluxe.com Check out Fiquet’s blog at: thebeautyofitall.net

CHANEL Rouge Coco Hydrating Creme Lip Colour, $32 If you are short on time, turn to a bold lip color. Keep eyes simple & make a statement with classic red or burgundy. Tip: Add longevity to your look by layering lipstick over lip liner. TO BUY: Available at local department stores

3. liquid liner REVLON Colorstay Liquid Eye Pen, $7.74 If you don’t have time for complicated shadow, leave lids bare (or apply a simple wash of pale shadow) and define eyes with liquid liner. Tip: New applicators make applying liquid liner a breeze. Look for pointed felt-tip pen liners. TO BUY: Available at Walmart

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M

von kekel_nd.pdf 10/5/11 4:57:04 PM

Busy holiday schedules are no excuse! Like most women, I find myself with little time to transition from work to play. Here are a few of my favorite tricks to go from office appropriate to holiday glam in no time.

4. glitter polish Nicole by OPI Nail Polish, $7.04 Trade in your everyday manicure for something more festive. Tip: Apply a clear top coat with sparkle over your existing nail color. TO BUY: Available at Target

5. stick foundation BECCA Stick Foundation, $44 Cocktail parties call for a more polished look than your day-to-day routine. Apply over tinted moisturizer or lightweight foundation only in areas that require more coverage. TO BUY: Available at Luxe Beauty Boutique

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hosting

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1

Holiday Hosting | FOOD

FOOD most Arguably the ce to important pie tertaining. successful en cutive We asked Exe ovan of Chef T.J. Don aterers Ladyfingers C of your to ease some did not stress, and he re are dissapoint. He recipes some simple for “success”.

2

Layered Crab Cocktail

16 oz soft cream cheese 1 small onion 2 Tbsp horseradish 8 oz lump crab 3 lemons 6 oz cocktail sauce 2 tsp fresh parsley, chopped Salt and pepper to taste

ROASTED GARLIC SPREAD 3 heads of garlic (unpeeled) 1 Tbsp olive oil ½ cup sour cream ¼ cup mayonnaise 1 chopped green onion (hold green parts in reserve) 1 Tbsp Champagne vinegar ½ tsp salt ¾ Tbsp pepper 1 tsp drained pimento (dried)

Put onion and horseradish in a food processor, puree until smooth. Mix with cream cheese, salt, pepper and the juice of one lemon. Spread onto dish with a small rim. On top of cream cheese mixture, spread cocktail sauce and top with lump crab. Squeeze 2nd lemon’s juice over top and garnish with parsley and lemon wedges. Serve with flatbread crackers or Saltines.

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D

Preheat oven to 300 degrees. Cut off the top of garlic to expose the cloves, about ¼ of an inch. Brush with olive oil and place on a baking sheet. Bake for 1 hour or until cloves are tender and nicely browned. Allow garlic to cool. When garlic is cooled, squeeze out of the skin into a mixing bowl. Mash garlic with a whisk, and then add mayonnaise, sour cream, white parts of green onion, vinegar, salt and pepper. Whisk until evenly blended and chill for 4 hours. Garnish with green parts of the green onion and pimento. Serve with pita chips, flatbread crackers or toasted baguettes.

thr3e Bacon and Blue Dip

4

7 applewood smoked bacon strips (cooked and diced) 2 garlic cloves, minced 8 oz softened cream cheese 4 oz heavy cream 7 oz blue cheese crumbles 3 Tbsp chopped chives 3 Tbsp sliced almonds

Toasted Pita Chips

Blend cream cheese, bacon, heavy cream, 6 oz of the blue cheese, 2 oz of the chives and garlic together. Put into a greased baking dish, top with almonds and bake until warm, about 30 minutes. Garnish top with rest of blue cheese and chives. Serve with toast points or pita chips.

1 bag of pita bread 2 Tbsp olive oil 1 tsp salt ½ tsp black pepper ¼ tsp garlic powder ½ tsp dried basil

Cut pita bread into 8 pieces. Toss in olive oil, salt, pepper, garlic powder and basil. Bake for 10 minutes at 400 degrees, or until toasted.

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Holiday Hosting | drink

B D

F

C

DRINK

belly is Now that your e fun full, it’s on to th s a little stuff – drinks! It’ x thavn more comple k. What you might thin and wine to serve, it in? Nevwhat to serve se the er fear, becau itessentials experts at Qun sy and Vinos Fino re!

e Picadas are h

if

E

A

G

H

you are thinking of purchasing anything new before you begin the holiday season, consider updating your wine glasses! The difference between a very good wine and a great one is very subjective; everyone’s palate is different. However there is one thing that makes a difference when it comes to how wine tastes – the wine glass. Drinking from a glass that is designed to flatter the particular grape in a wine changes everything. For this reason, glass and crystal companies like Riedel and William Yeoward Crystal have designed glasses for those who want to enjoy everything a wine has to offer.

A. Cabernet

B. Champagne Flute

C. Red Wine

D. Burgundy

E. White Wine

F. Bordeaux

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G


ux

time for

WINE

Ok, you’ve got new wine glasses, now it’s time to choose the right wine. What type of wine you buy depends on the type of party you are hosting, explained Patrick West, owner of Vinos Finos y Picadas at

BEST FRIENDS

Lafayette Village. “If it’s a small group of your best friends, you choose differently than a large party for friends and friends of friends”. We asked West to recommend some of his favorite wines for both types or events.

FRIENDS OF FRIENDS

Kristen Anderson, owner of Quintessentials at North Hills: “I recommend William Yeoward’s Olympia collection for wine lovers. This collection of handmade glasses was created to enhance the flavors in different wines and the enjoyment of drinking them.” G. Port/Sherry

H. Brandy

Vina Cobos Bramare Cabernet Sauvignon (Mendoza, Argentina) $38

Santa Julia Brut Rose Sparkling (Mendoza, Argentina) $12

Catena Alta Chardonnay (Mendoza, Argentina) $33

Copas 2 Tempranillo and Malbec Blend (Mendoza Argentina) $9

Bodega Gratia Malbec (Mendoza, Argentina) $20

Cousino Macul Sauvignon Gris (Maipo Valley, Chile) $15

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HoLiday Hosting | DeSSerT

DESSERT

n your depending o rence, personal prefe e tastiest it could be th rty. part of the pa ome in desserts can c sizes all shapes and really look– but if you’re , read ing to impress rts from what the expe ggest. smallcakes su

good

things come in small packages!

Guests want to easily nibble and enjoy themselves without worrying about spilling, dropping, or tipping anything over. So just like your other food, serve up BITE-SIZE desserts for sweet treats that are sure to please your crowd. Mini cupcakes from Smallcakes Minis $10.99/dozen

urbanfood_so.pdf 8/24/11 9:28:15 AM

Regular size $29.50/dozen ladyfingers_so.pdf 7/21/11 12:46:52 PM

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t s e b e h t s What’ or t i n o m o t way s s e c c a ’ s d our ki ? y g o l o n h c e to t Gala By Christa

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’ve asked many parents this same question after walking in on my 8-year-old son watching a YouTube video entitled, “How to Kiss.” Although it was pretty tame – and he found it by accident – it got me thinking. What, really, was I supposed to be doing to ensure he didn’t get into any trouble? The other parents I asked weren’t sure either. Cell phones, the Internet, texting and Call of Duty weren’t around when we were growing up, but rest assured, they’re here to stay. It’s a rapidly changing world with languages we mostly don’t speak. Our kids, however, are on the inside track, but they’re still just kids. Most aren’t savvy enough emotionally to handle the potential fallout. And boy is there fallout. “We’re seeing it – kids not getting into colleges they wanted to get into,” says Cary High School guidance counselor Angela Jankowsky. “Kids not getting jobs they want based on things they’ve done online. Kids who are victims of cyber-bullying taking their lives or having long-term mental health issues due to stuff going on online. Monitoring is necessary; it’s not even an option.”

A good offense Jankowsky, after procuring a generous grant, decided to bring in someone who could answer that question definitively: Katie Koestner. Koestner is the founder and executive director of Campus Outreach Services, a national organization that provides programs and resources dedicated to helping students make safe and healthy decisions, speaking to thousands of organizations in North America, including MIT, the U.S. Military Academy at West Point, and at special events, including Take Back the Night. Koestner’s organization is no stranger to the national news, and neither is she. Koestner made headlines in the 1990s as the first date rape survivor in midtownmag.com| xx 71

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America to take her story public. She’s been on the cover of Time magazine, Oprah and CNN, among others. Below, Koestner offers tips for how to keep your kids safe from predators – and each other – while Jankowsky chimes in with advice from the front lines.

the characters are just that, not real people who are going to come to play with them. One last thing: Television and even simple Internet games can still be highly addictive. That’s by design, says Koestner. “That unique combination of flashing lights, color schemes, elements of chance, playing on Guidelines by Age the frontal lobe development – all of those things are embedded Ages 3-6 purposely with the assistance of psychologists who understand the First and foremost, help this age group understand what’s real and developing brain of a child. They’re very specifically put there to what’s not. “You’ve got to start with helping children understand keep children online and addicted. The number one business of exactly what is going on when they’re any dot com is to make revenue. The only looking at a two-dimensional flat panel,” way to make revenue is to keep children says Koestner, referring to television. online in front of that screen as much as When we were children, they possibly can. They don’t make any entertainment was always a single dimenmoney if a child is not logged in.” Check sites such as Top Ten Reviews for reviews on monitoring software. For sion experience. It was not dynamic or $20, Campus Outreach Services offers interactive. “We may have thought they Ages 7-12 a 450-page electronic Cyber Comwere dancing for us on Sesame Street, but At this age, kids are developing their sense pendium for Parents and Teens that there was no way any of those characters of self, often asking questions like “Who Koestner recommends; the site, www. were going to come out of the screen and am I?” and “Where does my identity feel campusoutreachservices.com, also ofconverse with us or have any other impact like it fits?” fers complimentary tips. Traditionally, kids explored these on us other than what was on the screen Denise Reinert and Angie Seagle, at the moment,” says Koestner. avenues in person; today electronic with the local branch of Kidzafe, are offer Now your child can jump on a blog experiences, through video games and the ing free Internet safety classes to churches, or the show’s website and interact, an Internet, play a big role. schools and other organizations. For more “Young people in that pre-teen amazing experience for them. Just make info, visit www.kidzafenc.com. sure they understand the difference: that phase are going to be trying on for size

Resources

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personas online,” says Koestner. “So the mantra of ‘Don’t reveal your personal information online’ that parents have comforted themselves in saying is a very bad one.” Koestner said this advice originated with dot coms wanting us to feel that as long as no address or phone number is revealed, kids are fine on the computer unsupervised. Not true! Of course no one should give out their personal financial information or address, but do encourage your child to be truthful about their personal life; for example, what school they go to, what sports they’re involved in and where they live. “By not revealing personal information online, children are developing a dual sense of self,” says Koestner. “They’re lying at the get-go about who they are, and they’re not making a significant connection between their online personality and their in-person personality. That’s disastrous in many ways for the core development of self confidence.” That duality can also lead to the propensity to post comments anonymously and do things they wouldn’t normally do online. Don’t set the stage for such a persona. The message: Be who you are and own it. “By not revealing personal information online, we think we’re protecting our children from predators, but what we’re really doing is breaking down their confidence and identity-building, an important skill set at that age group,” says Koestner. Ages 13-18 “Once you allow the Internet to come to the phone, you have to set all kinds of parental parameters about what they can use and also the time of use,” says Koestner. For example, you might have a rule that teens can’t use the phone after midnight. Check to see if they do. Consider banning some sites (see sidebar), but tell your kids why. And encourage kindness to others. “I just shake my head; it’s sad,” says Jankowsky. “When we were growing up, we did our thing and had our little black books, but it wasn’t for all the world to see, first of all. Secondly, it wasn’t so downright mean, to the The sites below aren’t bad core of their being – the per se, but often tempt kids to worst things you could say or post things that could get possibly say.” them in trouble: Specifically, girls often taunt other girls about Formspring.me Lets kids anonymously post skin color, acne, cellulite things about other kids. With no and weight, among other accountability, things can get things. It’s ironic that ugly fast. what would be considered harassment, slander and Hotornot.com stalking in adult life is onHere, people post pictures of going and largely accepted themselves while others rate that in what should be a safe person “hot” or “not.” The site also and nurturing environoffers a match making engine ment for minors. called ‘Meet Me’ and an extended

Asking for trouble

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The offenders tell Jankowsky: “That’s just what we do.” She attributes part of it to “mean girls” mentality, referring to the popular movie of the same name. “With parent involvement, it’s not so much of an issue. I do feel like some of the kids who have the most issues don’t have a very good home family life. “But even with the best kids from the best families, there are anomalies where they are engaging in this kind of behavior and activity,” Jankowsky continues. “Regularly I’m in contact with families who really are just blown away when their kid is involved, the things being done and sent and just thinking they can erase it and it’s gone. But that’s not reality.” Many kids do fine with this technology; they’ll learn the etiquette quickly when they know you’ll hold them accountable. Gradually increase Internet access and decrease monitoring as your child ages and shows decency and self discipline. Hopefully, by age 18 he or she will have both in spades.

TeXT AcRonYMs You Don’T WAnT To see: RU/18: Are you over 18? RUMORF: Are you male or female? LGNOC: let’s get naked on camera Pron: porn P911 or PA: Parent Alert PAW: Parents are watching I&I: Intercourse and inebriation LM4a~##zzzz>: let’s meet for a joint For an extensive list of texting acronyms, visit: netlingo.com/acronyms.php

WHAT PARenTS neeD TO KnOW You really can’t pass the buck to the schools on this issue, although some of the parents Jankowsky talks to don’t want to micro-manage their kids. “It’s a fine line and a balance,” admits Jankowsky. “Regardless of the age – eight or 18 – they don’t know the boundaries.” Below, tips for all ages and a few “absolutes” that just might surprise you. There is no privacy when it comes to the Internet. cardinal gibbons_nd.pdf AM Ever. “There is a point 9/22/11 at which 10:38:25 your child needs to

have a sense of privacy,” admits Koestner. “The way to teach that is not with technology. There’s no such thing as privacy online anywhere or anytime. None.” There’s no privacy in the real world concerning the Internet (which kids often don’t understand), so why should they have privacy from you? Jankowsky says parents may have to be mean about this

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because kids are really going to push for you to leave their Internet correspondence alone. “It’s going to take parents putting their foot down,” she says. “Kids will still find loopholes, but if they’re not allowing you access, that’s obviously a huge red flag.” Action: If they won’t have a phone plan where you can check their text messages, no phone. Won’t let you be a Facebook friend? No Facebook. Transparency is key. At the same time, be cautious not to flip over normal kid stuff, such as your child posting, “I had an awful day!” or “This project stinks!” Intervene if you see bullying, name calling, inappropriate pictures, etc., but choose your battles carefully. You are in charge of the Send and Enter button. “Once those two buttons are pressed by a child, the parent is legally responsible for whatever damage may befall anyone who’s harmed by transmitting data, whether intentional or unintentional, out to the world wide web by their child,” says Koestner. It’s true. “If it’s ever referred to me, I get the parents involved. It’s got to come from them,” Jankowsky says, adding parents can be responsible even if the message was forwarded from another child. Action: “Talk to them. If they don’t want to talk, text them,” says Jankowsky. “Interact and engage with them. If you are their Facebook friend and you see something that bothers you, bring it up – any kind of communication to open the door for them to open up back to you. That’s really what we want, ultimately; we want to have that trusting relationship, even if we’re not happy with the choices they’re making.”

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Do what you say you’re going to do. Parents must remind kids to take constant responsibility and ownership of everything they do online. Action: Follow up. Hold the child accountable, says Jankowsky. “If the parent says, ‘Don’t talk to strangers online’ and then never bothers to check to make sure the child has followed instructions, there will be a bad lesson learned.” Koestner adds: “You have to hit this technology issue the same way you would any other controversial issue, whether it’s alcohol consumption by minors or sex.”

HoW olD? Phones Without Internet: any age. With Internet: 12 or 13, with restrictions and monitoring. Facebook Middle school or high school, with the stipulation you can be your child’s “friend.”

A lOT TO leARn It’s a lot to take in. And a lot to learn. But teaching Internet safety while our kids are still young enough to benefit from it is a good idea. Our kids are worth it. midtownmag.com| 107

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EVERY CHILD SHOULD HAVE A

BIKE! Triangle Spokes Group believes every child should have a bike – and they are making it happen! Over the last four years they’ve donated 1,050 bikes to need-worthy children around the Triangle!

This year’s goal – 500 bikes!

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modern enhancement_nd.pdf 10/4/11 11:59:06 AM

With your help they will give 500 Triangle children new bikes through the Salvation Army Toy Shop!

YOU CAN HELP! Visit: www.trianglespokesgroup.org or

2nd Annual Kick Off The Holidays Lonerider Party November 30, 2011 • 6-10pm www.trianglespokesgroup.org Live music, silent auction & food from the Triangle’s best food trucks. Enjoy Lonerider brews (Shotgun Betty, Sweet Josie, Peacemaker and limited edition Outlaw Release). A portion of all beer sales and 100% of tips will go towards buying new bikes!

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It’s the time of year when we head home to visit mom and dad. But what happens when you notice that your parents may be having a hard time taking care of things?

having the

heart heart to

BY ILLYSE LANE

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J

Jay Eubank was prepared. He and his sister had spoken numerous times about their mother, who had been living alone since losing her husband. They couldn’t help but notice that her house seemed to be too much for her to maintain. “We felt it may have been overwhelming for our mom, being in the house, having to deal with the yard and all of the other things you have to keep up with,” remembers Eubank. “Her health was also not in great shape, so we were worried.” So in April, Eubank boarded a plane to Memphis to sit down with his sister and mother and have the dreaded conversation – the one in which they’d share their concerns and open the floor to discuss other living situations. “We knew it would be a tough conversation, but we thought if we approached her together, organized and rational, she may be receptive to considering a move,” says Eubank. According to Kathleen Loescher of Springmoor Life Care Retirement Community, Eubank’s approach was right on track. “We can never stress enough the importance of having a plan in place long before a need or crisis situation arises,” she says. “It can be a long process from the initial talk to the point when parents make a decision and move somewhere. It’s so important to start early and be proactive.”

the SignS it MAy Be tiMe

Recognizing that a parent may be in need of some assistance is essential to making sure that he or she will have the help they need when the time comes. And by taking the time to notice the small, telltale signs that your parents are having difficulties, you can plan ahead, avoiding the need to make a hasty decision if a crisis should strike. So what should you be looking for? According to the AARP, if you notice that your parents are having trouble taking care of themselves, such as having poor hygiene, not eating enough food, and having difficulties getting around, it may be time to consider an alternative living arrangement. Additionally, if you notice that there are issues with the home itself, ranging from general poor condition and uncleanness to potential safety hazards, such as broken handrails on steps, it’s also time to have the talk.

MAKe CAReFUl pRepARAtionS

Having the talk can be easier said than done. It’s often one of the first times that adult children are forced to take on more of a parental role. And this role change can make children feel very apprehensive. “As an adult, you’re used to being the dad to your children. I knew this was midtownmag.com| xx

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It’s not going to be easy to talk to your parents about changing their living situation. But there are ways to do it that ensure their dignity and self esteem remain intact.

going to be very hard,” says Eubank. “Even though I knew we weren’t going to be treating my mother like a child, I knew I really didn’t want to have this conversation.” So what can you do to make it easier? Going into the conversation with a sibling or someone else who is significant to your parents is always a good idea. And during the talk, make sure your parents understand that your intentions are good, and you have their best interest at heart. By using “I” statements, such as “I am concerned”, followed by specific examples, such as “I want to make sure you don’t get hurt” or “It looks as if you may be having trouble with the steps”, you can show concern while allowing them to maintain their self esteem. It’s also recommended to ask for feedback from your parents, so they know that their thoughts matter.

A Chilly Reception

Well, you know what they say about the best-laid plan. Even with their careful preparation and kind manner, Eubank’s mother was adamant about staying in her home. Loescher says this kind of reception is not unusual, as your parent’s first reaction will be to worry about losing their independence. “You’re dealing with someone that has lived in their current home for 30 or 40 years, it’s where they’ve raised children, and it’s full of memories for them. A conversation about leaving that house can be a very emotional thing,” says Loescher. So what next? Interestingly enough, even with the chilly reception Eubank and his sister received, they were headed down the right path. As soon as the dialogue is started, you have a foundation to build upon. And if timed right, it can open the door to formulating a plan and having future conversations before issues set in.

The Open Door

“Having that first conversation opened the door for us. My mother now realizes that there are things she can’t do, and maybe there are things that she doesn’t care about doing. But she is more determined to stay in her home, so she’s started to work more on her health, and it’s helping her get stuff done around the house,” says Eubank. “She’s thinking about the future.” And now that the door is open, Eubank and his sister feel as though xx | midtownmag.com

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they can be proactive on their own, without having another conversation with their mother for a number of months. “Opening the door gave us peace of mind, and a place to start,” says Eubank, “Now, we can do our homework as to the type of facilities that may fit well when the time comes.” So how should you proceed? Continue to research the type of facilities that may be a good match and plan on having follow-up conversations at a later date that will give you feedback as to how your parents are doing. Keep in mind that the brunt of taking care of aging parents usually falls on the child who lives in the closest proximity. By doing your homework now, you are not only helping your parents, but the sibling who tends to be the nearest caregiver.

Think it may be time for the heart-to-heart?

Moving Forward

4. When you talk with your parents: ➢ > Show support and understand their desire for independence. ➢ > Explain that you want to balance that desire with their safety, ➢ > Use “I” statements such as “I want you to be healthy”, and ask for their feedback and be aware of their self esteem

While we’d all prefer to think that we outgrew the challenges of parent/child dynamics after our teenage years, we know better. Suddenly having responsibility for your aging parents’ well-being can be stressful. It’s helpful to view it as an opportunity to bring concerns out into the open. While it can be difficult to begin the dialogue, it could actually help your relationship. “By beginning the process early, the parent is fully involved in the decision, leaving no questions in their minds, or the minds of their children, that they have made the right choice,” says Loescher. And that’s always a good thing.

With our aging population, it’s not difficult to find tips on how to have “the conversation” with your parents. Here’s a five-step guide to help you, compiled from numerous experts: 1. Look for signs that your parents are having trouble taking care of themselves. 2. Consider involving a sibling or other significant people. 3. Expect to have more than one conversation.

5. Be proactive after your conversation, looking for the right fit for your parents.

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g e t

L U C K Y BY CHRISTA GALA

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Will you have good luck this year? No one knows for sure, but there’s no harm in indulging in a few traditional superstitions.

E

Let’s just call it insurance.

Every New Year’s Day my sister calls me, not too early, and asks the same question: “Are you cooking your black-eyed peas?” she’ll ask. And every year I scoff, “No! I don’t believe in that stuff.” Plus, I don’t even like black-eyed peas. She then tells me I’m not going to have luck or money in the New Year, whereas she and her husband are die-hard New Year’s Day traditionalists, at least in the Southern way. Not only do they have their peas, there are also collards and some type of pork, simmering away all day on the stove. Ah, maybe I scoff too soon. It’s true that I’m not technically a superstitious person, but what’s wrong with a little insurance? After all, these traditions have withstood hundreds of years. That in itself is a kind of ringing endorsement. Could there be something to these New Years staples? I mean, I could use luck and prosperity in 2012. Couldn’t you? Join me as I uncover why we eat what we eat on New Year’s Day. oN your PLatE Black-eyed peas: Why, exactly, are these legumes lucky? During the Civil War, black-eyed peas were used as a livestock crop. So when Sherman’s troops marched through the South, they left the pea fields alone. After the war, black-eyed peas became a nourishing food source for surviving Confederates. Lucky, indeed. Some people believe in eating black-eyed peas at the stroke of midnight; others are content to wait until the next day. And still others believe you must eat 365 black-eyed peas, which is a little gross and, frankly, problematic for the person you live with. Stewed tomatoes: This was new to me, but apparently if you eat your peas with stewed tomatoes, you’re courting both health and wealth. Collard greens: Some prefer to eat green beans or kale, but as long as it’s a green veggie, you’re good to go. The green stands for paper money; sometimes blackeyed peas are seen as the “coins.” Eating both together is supposed to usher in prosperity in the New Year.

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Pork: Why not beef or chicken? Supposedly a cow stands still and a chicken scratches backwards, neither of which bode well for the coming year. Pigs, on the other hand, root forward. Eating pork means you’ll move forward all year instead of scratching out a meager existence like chickens and turkeys or waiting for things to happen like the cows. Cornbread: This hearty staple hitches a ride on the prosperity wagon as well, representing gold. Do it your way The point, it seems, is to prepare and eat a meal that ushers in the New Year and closes the door on the old one. Feel free to add in your favorites to the traditional Southern staples. Each year Dan and Dawn Hamel of Apex cook a New Year’s Day feast that’s a nod to both her Southern roots and his Polish heritage. “Since I was raised Southern, we make black-eyed peas and collard greens, but Dan is polish, so we add in sauerkraut and kielbasa.” As for me, I usually adds something to ease my aching head, like pizza and pie. Combine your meal with activities you enjoy – an afternoon of football or movies. Or the traditional New Year’s kiss. Now that one’s a keeper.

Yummy Collard Greens Recipe contributed by Virginia Walker

Ingredients 3 slices bacon 1 tsp salt 1 tsp pepper 3 cups chicken broth 1 pinch red pepper flakes 1 lb fresh collard greens, cut into 2-inch pieces Directions Cook bacon in a large pot over medium-high heat. Remove bacon from pan, crumble and return to the pan. Add collard greens, and fry until they start to wilt. Pour in chicken broth, and season with salt, pepper and red pepper flakes. Reduce heat to low, cover and simmer for 45 minutes, or until greens are tender. 116 | midtownmag.com

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Black-Eyed Peas

Recipe contributed by Will Stephenson

Stewed Tomatoes

Recipe contributed by Barbara Pearce INGREDIENTS 1 (28 oz) can petite diced tomatoes 1 cup sugar 1/4 tsp black pepper Directions Pour tomatoes into sauce pan. Add the sugar slowly, 1/4 cup at a time, and taste until sweet or until acid taste is gone. Add pepper to taste (more pepper can be added later).carolina Cook dental over medium until3:55:52 thick.PMWatch your temperature and stir arts_ja.pdf heat 6/10/11 often. Cook about 1 hour.

Ingredients 1 package (16 oz) uncooked blackeyed peas 1/2 lb seasoned cured hamhock of side meat 1 Tbsp olive oil

2 Tbsp butter or margarine 2 tsp seasoned salt 2 tsp black pepper 2 cups water

Directions Cook on low until tender, stirring occassionally. Remove side meat and serve.

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IF YOU LOVE

MIDTOWN...

Consider becoming a member of the Midtown Raleigh Alliance. WHAT IS MIDTOWN? Midtown Raleigh is distinctive: • Long established neighborhoods with a thriving mix of businesses, schools, churches, parks and open space, and a vibrant 24/7 walkable urban center. • North Hills and the surrounding area within a 2-mile radius. • A sign that Raleigh is growing up...having a midtown center of density is an important marker in the life of successful cities. WHAT DOES THE ALLIANCE DO? Our new alliance brings together community leaders with those who live, work and play in Midtown to: • Advocate for our area’s needs. • Promote Midtown. • Enhance our quality of life.

WHY JOIN NOW? As Raleigh continues to grow faster than any other city among the nation’s top fifty, it’s about taking shared responsibility for the future of Midtown. • Stay informed on the latest issues...Midtown is an important link in the public dialog on Transit, Connectivity, Corridor Development and Smart Growth. • Get to know your neighbors with new opportunities for community involvement, Midtown events, special member offers and more. • Together we can tell our Midtown story more effectively while getting ahead of the significant growth yet to come.

BECOME A MEMBER TODAY To learn more and join online please visit MidtownRaleighAlliance.org

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midtown

MOMENTS

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LOCAL CELEBRATIONS

BRING

FUN, FAME

TO

CAROLINA CHRISTMAS

around the state

Chapel Hill band, the Squirrel Nut Zippers, wrote in 1998, “The snow is falling down up in some northern town, but the Carolina Christmas is still the best around.” After researching the Christmas celebrations and festivals from coast to mountains, I know that lyric wasn’t an empty boast.

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We have every type of festivity here – some floating, some on rails, some in the sky. Some for people, some for animals, one focusing on an animal. Artistic, electric and eclectic, from the traditional to the unique-to-thepoint-of-being-downright-odd. It’s all here, across the state, and there’s no way you could ever do and see it all. To help make your decision easier, we’ve whittled the list down to eleven favorites… midtownmag.com| 121

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18th Annual New Year’s Eve Possum Drop Brasstown • Dec. 31 New Year’s Eve celebrations are traditionally less stately than Christmas – often going from the sublime to the ridiculous – and this one is no exception. Clay Logan, of Clay’s Corner gas station in Brasstown, started the tradition as an homage to the town’s self-bestowed moniker of “the opossum capital of the world.” Thousands attend the pre-drop festivities, which begin at 5pm and include a choir perfo rmance, bluegrass music, cider toasts, and a cross-dres sing “beauty” contest in which men vie for the title of “Miss Possum.” At midnight, an opossum in a plexiglass cage is safely lowered to the ground – not dropped, as the name implie s – and later humanely released back into the wild. Finall y, the Brasstown Bridgade offers a blessing, a black-powder musket salute, and tuba solos for the new year. Call (828) 837-3797 for more information.

The Polar Express Bryson City • Nov. 4-Dec. 24 Let the Great Smoky Mountains Railroad help you relive the magical train ride from the children’s book . The 75-minute round trip ride begins at the Bryson City Depo t and transports passengers through the wilderness as they drink warm cocoa and listen to the story of The Polar Express while awaiting their stop at the “North Pole.” There, Santa himself boards the train to greet the children and give each of them their own silver bell, like the one in the story. On the return trip, passengers will enjoy singing along to Chris tmas carols. Tickets begin at $39 for adults and $26 for children aged 2-12. For more information, visit www.gsm r.com.

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naries l of Lights & Lumi Dillsboro Festiva 9-10 Dillsboro • Dec. 2-3, r each of four Decembe Beginning at dusk on nsforms tra oro lsb Dil of e ag vill evenings, the historic thanks nation and nostalgia, into a wonder of illumi ding lea d an s eet str ng the to 2500 luminaries lini the of s dio stu d an s op the way to the many sh rs arrange for live entervillage. The shopkeepe liday t cider, cocoa and ho tainment and ser ve ho and ll, Ha n Tow its vis nta treats. Carolers sing, Sa pm 5-8 m are available fro horse and buggy rides re mo r Fo ). ted are apprecia at no charge (but tips visit or 1 91 2-1 -96 00 ll 1-8 information, please ca . org ro. bo ills itd vis w. ww

National Gingerbread House Competi tion™ & Display Asheville • Nov. 16-Jan. 1 The Grove Park Inn will host a national comp etition to create edible holiday abodes that are enchanting, imaginative and awe-inspiring – with several slated to be featured on “Good Morning America” two days before Christmas . Admission is free Sunday-Thursday of each week. “Stories of Gingerbread” guided tours are available for a fee, offering a behin d-the-scenes look at the winning entries’ construction, as well as details about the judging, competition and display. For more information, visit www.groveparkinn.com. While you’re there, don’t miss Christmas at Biltmore, open from 9am-5pm daily from Nov. 4-Jan. 1. Tour the awe-inspiring Biltmore House, Gardens, Antler Hill Villag e and Winery (where you can enjoy a complimentary guided tour/ wine tasting). Santa and Mrs. Claus are in the Antler Hill Village Barn each weekend. Visit www.biltmore.com to order tickets.

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The Grove “Bark” Inn Gingerbread Doghouse Competition & Display Asheville • Dec. 4-7 Somewhat in conjunction with the National Gingerbread House Competition™, this challenges contestants to build doghouses entirely from dog-edible materials. Entries will be on display in the Grove Park’s country club, and attendees can vote on a “People’s Choice” winner in addition to the judges’ panel selections. Proceeds will benefit the Animal Compassion Network, Asheville Humane Society, Brother Wolf Animal Rescue, Humane Alliance of Asheville, and Paws on a Mission. Visit www.groveparkinn.com for additional information.

“Christmas Tow n, U.S.A” McAdenville • Dec. 1-26 Every year on Dec. 1, one lucky contest winner from McAdenville Ele mentary School gets to pull “the big switch” at 5: 30pm, turning on ne arly half a million lights and kicking off the comm unity ’s Christmas season. Pharr Yarns, a local business, has taken on the tra dition of stringing lig hts on more than 375 live trees – the most stu nning of which ring the town’s lake and 75-foot fou ntain. Lights, music, displa ys and more than 20 0 wreaths bring out the holiday spirit from on e end of town to the other, prompting Charles Ku ralt to give it the “Christmas Town” nickname in 1980. Visit www.mcadenvill e-christmastown.com for additional informati on.

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A Railroad Christmas Spencer • Nov. 26-Dec. 18 (varying) Jingle Bell Express (Nov. 29-30, Dec. 1-2, Dec. 6-9, Dec. 13-16) is a 25-minute, pre-booked train ride for school and priva te groups, featuring holiday music and a story. For pre-registration and fees, conta ct Vickie Peacock: (704) 636-2889, x232. Cookies and Cocoa with Santa (Dec. 3, 10, 16-17) is a 25-minute evening ride to the Roundhouse to sit on Santa’s lap, enjoy hot cocoa and cookies, listen to stories from Santa’s elves, make a craft and mail a

postcard to Santa. Admission is by advance tickets only – $15 for adults, $12 for children aged 3-12, and no charge for children 2 and under. Call (704) 636-2889, x237 , for tickets. Santa Train (Nov. 26-27, Dec. 3-4, 10-1 1, 17-18) is a ride with Santa’s elves to the Roundhouse, where kids will have their picture taken on Santa’s lap, make a craft, and bring home a candy cane. Tickets are available in advance or on the day of the event; please visit www.nctrans.org for a list of times and to order tickets.

Christmas at Körner’s Folly Kernersville • Nov. 25-Dec. 31 The so-called “strangest house in the world” was designed and built by artist Jule Körner more than 130 years ago as a temporary home and combination art studio. It’s worth a tour any time of year, with its 22 rooms, 15 firepla ces, seven levels, three floors. To see it adorned in full holiday splen dor makes the trip even more worthwhile. Admission is $10 for adults, $6 for children aged 6-18, and free for children under 6. The house is open for extended hours during the holidays: 10am-6pm Thursday-Saturday and 1-6pm Sunday. Allow at least an hour for touring; for more information, visit www.korn ersfolly.org.

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14th Annual “Twelve Days of Christmas” Celebration Chapel Hill • Dec. 3-31 The Carolina Inn offers a hodgepodge of holiday events throughout the month, with its decorative Twelve Days of Christmas vignettes. Kick off a month of festivities at the Community Open House on Saturday, Dec. 3, from 12-4pm – enjoy local artisans’ and food vendors’ displays, plus performances by local musicians, as you tour the Inn’s unique works of art interpreting the verses from “The Twelve Days of Christmas.” Events throughout the month include the 9th Annual Gingerbread House Competition and its resulting Gingerbread Village Display, a cakewalk to benefit TABLE Inc., breakfasts and brunches with Santa, various tea parties, a Scottish Highland dinner, the Lords-a-Leaping Luncheon to preview the upcoming Carolina Basketball season, and much more. For more information, visit www.carolinainn.com.

Holiday Lighting of the USS North Carolina (and more!) Wilmington • Nov. 25-Jan. 4 Even battleships can get in on the holiday act, as each night from dusk to 11pm, the USS North Carolina illuminates lights strung from bow to stern and up every mast. Check out the great view from downtown Wilmington, free of charge. Call (910) 251-5797 for details. While you’re there, be sure to see the World’s Largest Living Christmas Tree – a giant live oak more than 400 years old – which will be lit at 6:15pm Dec. 1 (following festivities at 5:35pm with Santa, the mayor and a brass band and chorus), and stay lit from 5:30-10pm each night until Jan. 1. xx | midtownmag.com

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28th Annual North Carolina Holiday Flotilla Wrightsville Beach • Nov. 25-26 The Holiday Flotilla draws around 50,000 people to Wrightsville Beach every year for Thanksgiving Weekend. The event starts with a Launch Party at the Blockade Runner on Friday night. The next day brings the Festival in the Park at Wrightsville Beach Park, featuring arts and crafts, children’s inflatables, a car show and the Sudan Shriners’ “Arab Choo Choo” miniature train. At 6pm, a volley of fireworks signals the start of the main event – a fantastic parade of boats along the Intracoastal Waterway, illuminated with holiday lights. Once the last boat is safely past, a fireworks display caps off a weekend of family fun. See www. ncholidayflotilla.org for more information.

Still looking for more lights in Wilmington? Check out “Enchanted Airlie” at Airlie Gardens, with gorgeous holiday greens, lights and musical entertainment, along with a large model train set and a 150,000-brick LEGO display. Viewings begin at 5pm and 7pm on Nov. 25 and 26 and Dec. 1-3, 8-10, 15-17, and 19-21. Tickets must be pre-purchased at $5 per adult and $4 per child aged 4-12, or $22 per carload. More information is available at www.airliegardens.org. And if you just can’t get enough of Wilmington’s holiday spirit, you can head downtown to go caroling with Santa and his “reindeer” as you take in the displays from a carriage or trolley, available from 6-10pm, Dec. 16-24, for $12 per adult and $5 per child under 12. See www.horsedrawntours.com for additional details. midtownmag.com| 127

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TALK OF THE EIGHTH ANNUAL RALEIGH NEIGHBORHOOD EXCHANGE

town. OF THE

On September 24th, Midtown Alliance director Martha Grove Hipskind joined Chris Moutos, Raleigh Downtowner; Ann-Cabell Baum Andersen, Downtown Living Advocates; and Ken Bowers, City of Raleigh Planning Department, for a panel presentation on New Urban Lifestyles at the Eighth Annual Raleigh Neighborhood Exchange.

HAPPY 20TH ANNIVERSARY! Skin Sense, a day spa held its 20th anniversary celebration on September 15th, 2011 at its North Raleigh location. The event featured a silent auction benefiting the SPCA, champagne and hors d’oevres catered by Kanki, live demonstrations and mini-treatments.

REX’S NEW MOBILE MAMMOGRAPHY UNIT UNVEILED HAPPY 10TH ANNIVERSARY! Michael Hamilton and Sarah Hill opened Hamilton Hill Jewelry at Brightleaf Square in 2001, and today it is considered one of the country’s premier designer jewelry galleries! Congratulations! Here’s to 10 more!

The new unit will provide women with easy access to breast cancer screenings, regardless of their health insurance or financial status. Rex’s MMU is the only mobile unit serving the central North Carolina region of 14 counties. The first MMU has already served an estimated 28,000 women and counting since 2001.

oops!

In our September/October issue “Triangle-Based Indie Band Living the Dream” the photos on pages 71, 72 and 74 were incorrectly credited. These photos are the work of Timothy Szczesniak and Hunter Lee Elliott with Fade To Black Photography and Cinema 919-283-9540 fadetoblackofficial.com. We apologize for the error!

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2012 MIDTOWN DIAMOND AWARDS

For six months, readers have voted on their favorites. We’ve counted the ballots and it’s time to announce the 2012 Midtown Magazine Diamond Award Winners! YOUR BEASTLY BACK

Back pain – whether mild or extreme, quick or constant – affects 80% of adults over 30! What raises your risk? What can you do about it? Learn about back pain’s causes, risks and prevention. MAGICAL MIRRORS

Mirrors can make or break a room’s look, but often a mirror is an afterthought. We’ll feature some of the most unique and interesting mirrors available here in Midtown and beyond. CONTEMPORARY TRADITIONAL STYLE

Do contemporary lamps or rugs catch your eye? Do you wish you could add a modern touch to your traditional home? It can be done – local designers share ideas on mixing contemporary and traditional for a fresh, updated look.

Plus lots more…

Wine Review | Chef Mario Bain’s Beat | Calendar of Events Talk of the Town | Healthy You Midtown Mingles | and much more! midtownmag.com| xx 93

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downtown

the moments that resonate The holidays are here and playbills abound. From musicals and one-man plays to symphonies and ballets, there’s a spotlight pointed at every red curtain in town. Audiences have their favorite moments. But did you ever wonder what the actors, directors, dancers and conductors think? Midtown asked. And they answered. By kate turgeon

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The Santaland Diaries

“The piece is full of Sedaris’ wit, cynicism and blunt observation. But toward the end…there’s a moment where all of that laughter is turned on its head. [After] poking fun at every group and class of people and shaking Christmas spirit by the shoulders... the reality of Christmas – what Christmas is and what it can be – shines through. It really throws the audience for a loop! They work to turn this moment into something it’s not, and then…they succumb. This blanket of silence fills the theater and it warms every ounce of me.” ~ Jesse Gephart, actor, Theatre in the Park’s The Santaland Diaries, an adult comedy written by David Sedaris that recounts his time working as an elf in Macy’s Santaland

A Christmas Story, The Musical “you know in the movie where ‘Ralphie’ is fantasizing about fighting off the enemy and defending his family? There’s a scene in the show and it’s a huge dance-and-song number, and they have zombies and gigantic monsters coming out on stage, and that’s just a lot of fun. ‘Ralphie’ has this cowboy hat on, and it’s a very macho ‘Ralphie’ to the rescue…like John Wayne or the ‘Lone Ranger.’” ~ Clarke Hallum, “Ralphie” in A Christmas Story, The Musical, presented in Raleigh by Broadway Series South, North Carolina Theatre and Hot Summer Nights

City Ballet’s Nutcracker “When ‘Clara’ enters the snowy pine forest…[it’s] magical. The stage has completely transformed from a colorful battleground to a fogmidtownmag.com| midtownmag.com|115 xx

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filled wonderland. Snow falls from the sky, adding beauty and danger. I get chills every time I watch this scene from backstage.” ~ Mariana Stanson, “Snow Queen” in City Ballet’s Nutcracker

A Christmas Carol “After his miraculous change of heart, ‘Ebenezer Scrooge’ is herded into the middle of a group of children who are singing The First Noel. When they reach the chorus, they pause and wait for ‘Scrooge’ to finish the song by himself. When I perform the role, I always hesitate for a few moments before beginning to sing the chorus... because if you want to know what Christmas honestly feels like, it’s there in that brief moment of silence.” ~ Ira David Wood III, “Scrooge” in Theatre in the Park’s A Christmas Carol

Cinderella “I guess that my favorite point in the show is when the Fairy Godmother changes ‘Cinderella’ out of the rags and into the beautiful gown almost right in front of the audience… when the lights come up and she’s in that gorgeous gown with her hair done and the audience says ‘ahhh’… and I’m watching them react.” ~ Haskell Fitz-Simmons, director, Raleigh Little Theatre’s Cinderella

City Ballet’s Nutcracker “I enjoy the entire party scene [with its] cheerful music, elegant party dresses…[and] tons

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of elaborately wrapped gifts under a beautiful, victorian Christmas tree…all of the guests seem so happy and festive. I think every little girl would enjoy a party like this, where she gets to dress in a fancy party dress and dance and celebrate.” ~ Reaghan Waites, “Clara” in City Ballet’s Nutcracker

did

YOU

know? For 2011, Carolina Ballet’s Nutcracker includes new scenery and illusion.

Imagine toys coming to life and children shrinking, levitating and appearing out of thin air. It’s a fresh twist on an old favorite for artistic director Robert Weiss, who still gets a tingle up his spine when he hears Tchaikovsky’s storied overture open the ballet.

919-787-4534 Mon-Sat 10am-7pm | Sun 12-5pm

www.HayleysBoutique.com

A Carolina Christmas “We have…seasonal favorites [and] a world premiere of a unique North Carolina tale. The Gathering (by singer/songwriter Laurelyn Dossett) tells the heart-warming story of a family… [and] a ‘prodigal’ daughter returning home. Beautiful lyrics, elegant tunes, four singers, a string band, chorus and symphony orchestra.” ~ Grant Llewellyn, Music Director, North Carolina Symphony’s A Carolina Christmas

Merry Christmas, Strega Nona “My favorite moment is in the beginning when all of the residents of a small village in Calabria, Italy joyously greet each other, decorate the square and celebrate. It awakens memories of my midtownmag.com| 133

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childhood when people seemed to be more connected and when they seemed to have more time to talk to each other and to celebrate life’s small treasures.” ~ Linda O’Day Young, director of Merry Christmas, Strega Nona, a Raleigh Little Theatre production about an old witch who doesn’t use magic for her Christmas feast because, as she says, “Christmas has a magic all its own.”

New Year’s in Vienna “vienna with a twist…we do waltz, polka and quickstep with the Strausses…then it’s off to the races with glorious soprano Sari Gruber and a whole host of unlikely numbers

from all around the world. All festive and fun, with perhaps a twist of lemon, lime, or maybe an olive or two to complete the most exotic New year’s cocktail…simply intoxicating!” ~ Grant Llewellyn, Music Director, North Carolina Symphony’s New Year’s in Vienna

for more

INFORMATION

on shows, dates and tickets, visit ncsymphony.org carolinaballet.com theatreinthepark.com raleighlittletheatre.org city-ballet.com progressenergycenter.com/ broadway-series-south

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downtown

NYE in DTR

12

Reasons To Give The Acorn Its Due By kate turgeon

W

hen it comes to New Year’s Eve activities, there has to be some middle ground between partying into the wee hours of the morning (think little black dress and champagne) and ringing in the New Year asleep (think flannel pajamas and a bedside cup of tea). Luckily, there is. And it’s a celebration that’s been giving Raleigh its all since it debuted to welcome 1992. It started with Raleigh resident Ann Smith, who attended a First Night event in Boston and brought the idea home to city leaders, who handed the programming over to Artsplosure. That first year the event drew 15,000 attendees. “She always said that the first year they really didn’t know if anybody would come,” says Terri Dollar, Artsplosure’s program director. “It was very successful, actually…very popular.” And the popularity has grown. Last year more than 50,000 midtownmag.com| xx

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people attended. As in prior years, Artsplosure organizers expect the event to continue its steady growth. And First Night Raleigh 2012 will bring more than just the dropping of the iconic acorn. Check out Midtown’s countdown of the 12 reasons to be there:

12 It’s French. And when an event theme is based on a culture that puts chocolate inside warm bread, what’s not to love?

11

9

Organizers are set to transform Fayetteville Street into a Parisian boulevard, complete with a Ferris wheel. Look for jugglers, sidewalk painters, mimes, living statues and a model of the Eiffel Tower.

There’s dancing in the Sir Walter Raleigh Ballroom. “[It’s] like stepping back in time,” says Dollar. “And it’s the kind of thing that’s so unexpected…you go through this little hallway and then you get upstairs and it’s absolutely gorgeous. You don’t want to miss that.”

10 Organizers are gathering a wide range of French inspired performers, which can mean anything from Cajun to French Canadian. “There’s a wide range,” explains Dylan Morris, Artsplosure’s operations manager. “Some of the standbys who have participated for a number of years are looking at incorporating French themes into their own programming.”

Designed as a family-friendly event, First Night Raleigh has a list of activities to delight both the young and the young at heart. The event covers about 17 city blocks and entertains nearly 50,000 people on New Year’s Eve.

8 Solace in the sanctuary. When everything on Fayetteville Street is jumping, there’s quiet, warmth and music inside some of the sanctuaries of participating downtown churches.

7 Laughter. Who doesn’t need it these days? “Go to one of the comedy shows,” suggests Dollar. “To me, those are so much fun…and I think people should definitely take advantage of those kinds of things.”

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The people’s procession is a beloved tradition at First Night Raleigh. For the 2012 event, organizers plan to welcome the new year with help from a French-inspired theme.

6 An admission button costs $9. Seriously. When you purchase it before the event it’s about the cost of a movie ticket. “For nine bucks you get access to over two dozen venues, over 100 performances...[any other time] you’d pay nine dollars or more to see any one of them,” says Morris.

5 Fireworks! The midnight acorn drop’s display lasts about 10 minutes. The early countdown (a family favorite) has fireworks too!

4 Raleigh is a part of a larger group of First Night celebrations and each one has the same premise: to be a community-based celebration of the arts.

3 Weather or not. Raleigh’s First Night revelers have proved themselves to be a non-fickle bunch. On occasions with unseasonably balmy temperatures, they’re there. And when it’s raining, they’re there too. With umbrellas.

2 It’s participatory. “We have a jazz band that traditionally plays at Christ Church and a good section of their performance is that they invite people to bring an instrument and have a jam with them… it’s heavy on the participatory stuff so that people don’t just sit and get entertained, but have to get involved in it too,” says Dollar.

1 Your community already loves First Night Raleigh! Hundreds of volunteers assist Artsplosure organizers and nearly 30 venues from museums to bank lobbies open their doors for the event. “There’s a 17-block footprint,” says Morris.

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Our Breast Advice

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Dr. Lisa Tolnitch shares what’s new in breast cancer treatment… and which “old standbys” still work BY PAGE LEGGETT

A diagnosis of breast cancer, to the woman who hears it, is devastating. But, today, there are plenty of reasons for that woman – and all women – to be hopeful. “Most women who have breast cancer do not die from it,” said Lisa Tolnitch, M.D., a breast cancer specialist who joined Duke Cancer Institute in October. Remission and survival rates have gotten “dramatically better” in recent years, Dr. Tolnitch said. “And, incidence rates of women getting breast cancer are holding steady.” “Surgery, drugs and radiation have all gotten better,” she said. “And, there are a slew of drugs in development, too, that mean even more promise.” One of those drugs that Dr. Tolnitch fi nds the most promising is Herceptin. She said it’s going to make a big difference in the way breast cancer is treated. “Herceptin will target a specifi c part of the DNA of a tumor without affecting the rest of the body. It’s really the future of breast cancer treatment. Eventually, all treatment will be more targeted.”

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Dr. Lisa tolitch, Tolnitch Surgical Associates

The seed money for the development of Herceptin came from the cosmetic industry, Dr. Tolnitch said. And, there are more exciting drugs in development now. And, drugs aren’t all that’s in the pipeline; there are new diagnostic tests, too. Tomo, or 3D, mammography is expected to receive FDA approval in 2012. Dr. Tolnitch is investigating adding it to her practice now. Here’s how she describes how it works: “It takes pictures of the breasts from many angles. Then, those pictures are combined in a way that allows the doctor to sort of leaf through them, like you’d leaf through the pages of a book. It’s a much more complete picture.”

First steps: Prevention and early detection Even with all the new tests and treatments (and good news about survival rates), some of the same old advice still holds true. Doctors recommend monthly breast self-exams. They’re your best chance at early detection of a lump. Dr. Tolnitch’s advice: “Do them right after you have your period. Your hormones are at their lowest, and the breasts will be less knotty.” It should come as no surprise that a healthy lifestyle cuts down on your chances of getting any cancer, including breast cancer. “Regular, aerobic exercise cuts cancer rates in half,” said Dr. Tolnitch. “Regular exercise means four to five times a week of doing something that gets your heart rate up. It could be running, swimming, jumping up and down – anything that gets you moving.” Of course, diet plays a part in a healthy lifestyle. “There’s some controversy over what foods are good and bad when it comes to cancer,” Dr. Tolnitch said. “What I tell my patients is, ‘Avoid highly processed food. Eat what comes in its own wrapper.’” “Higher Vitamin D levels may also be beneficial in helping prevent cancer,” she continued. The bottom line, says Dr. Tolnitch, is to live as healthfully as you can. “And, stay on top of checking yourself.”

To mammogram or not to mammogram? There was a lot of uncertainty in late 2009 when the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force questioned the age at which baseline mammograms are recommended in the United States. 140 | midtownmag.com

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Dr. Tolnitch helps clear that up. She said, “In Europe, they typically begin screening at age 50. But here in the U.S., we recommend beginning to screen at age 40, unless there’s someone in your family who had breast cancer at a young age.” The likely reason for the controversy in 2009? Dr. Tolnitch said, “This is not just a medical issue. It’s a financial issue. You have to do a lot of mammograms in young women to find any incidence of cancer. But, to that one young woman who is diagnosed, it’s priceless.” About 25 percent of all breast cancers are found in women under age 50. The American Cancer Society still recommends mammograms for women beginning at age 40 and continuing each year until age 80 unless a more significant health problem arises, such as multiple heart attacks or strokes. The digital age has brought mammography a long way. “The digital mammogram is especially an improvement for young women with dense breasts,” Dr. Tolnitch said.

If cancer is found The course of treatment for breast cancer will depend on the size of the tumor and the stage at which it’s discovered. “Women with small breast tumors have a lot of options,” Dr. Tolnitch said. “With small tumors, a lumpectomy and a mastectomy yield equal long-term survival rates.” If the tumor is large – say, the size of a grapefruit – a mastectomy is

probably going to be the recommendation. If a woman has a known gene mutation, that may change the course of treatment, said Dr. Tolnitch. That woman might want to consider having both breasts removed. But, only about 8 percent of breast cancers discovered are due to a gene mutation. And, the test for a gene mutation is easy. It involves either a blood test or a mouth swab. Dr. Tolnitch is the latest example of Duke Raleigh’s tradition of hiring the best. She first started in practice in 1988 and founded Tolnitch Surgical Associates in 1991. Hers was the first practice in the area focused exclusively on treating breast disease. The Phi Beta Kappa graduate of the University of Kentucky earned her M.D. from the College of Medicine at the University of Louisville. She completed her internship and residency at the University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill and was chief resident in 1988. She’s both a regional and national expert on breast cancer. She was featured on NBC’s Today show in 2009 and has also been featured on several TV news programs in the Raleigh area as an authority on treating breast cancer. Dr. Tolnitch has always looked for the most effective and least invasive treatments for her patients. She understands and uses the latest treatments but believes in the traditional advice about self-exams and regular screenings. And, she believes most patients have a good deal of control over their health destinies. Take care of yourself, exercise, and eat right. And, if you do discover anything questionable, the doctor is in.

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healthy you

why

EVERYONE

should try the

aka

SPICE of LIFE

TUMERIC by carter & laura dalton, GNC at North Hills

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D

r. Weil, Dr. Oz, Dr. Perricone – all the docs we respect and enjoy agree – this spice is a virtual powerhouse! I am speaking of turmeric. Turmeric, known throughout the world as “The Spice of Life”, has been used for its therapeutic properties for thousands of years. As you probably already know, this brightly-colored relative of ginger is a major ingredient in Indian curries, and makes American mustard yellow. But evidence is accumulating that turmeric, and its primary active ingredient, curcumin, is a promising disease-preventive agent as well, probably due largely to its anti-inflammatory effects. The Science Inflammation: You don’t have to have a serious medical condition to suffer from inflammation. It can show up in the form of poor skin, heartburn or allergies and be a bear to get rid of, especially if you have stress in your life. Stress is a HUGE contributor to inflammation! Turmeric contains more than two dozen anti-inflammatory compounds, including COX-2inhibitors (the COX-2 enzyme promotes pain, swelling and inflammation), making it a go-to for symptom relief of osteoarthritis/rheumatoid arthritis. Inflammatory conditions such as fibromyalgia and colitis, as well as those mentioned above, have been found to improve in some folks with the help of turmeric. Alzheimer’s disease: Epidemiologists have hypothesized that the turmeric that is part of daily curries eaten in India may help explain the low rate of Alzheimer’s disease in that country. Among people aged 70 to 79, the rate is less than one-quarter that of the United States! Reports indicate that extracts of turmeric contain a number of natural agents that block the formation of a substance responsible for obstruction of cerebral function. It is also used by anyone looking to increase mental sharpness, which makes me a prime candidate, as my clarity seemed to disappear when I had children. Cancer: Studies using curcumin have shown it to be effective in animal models in prevention and/or treatment of colon cancer, mammary cancer, prostate cancer, liver cancer, esophageal cancer and oral cancer. Moreover, researchers from the University of South Dakota have found that pretreatment with curcumin may make cancer cells more vulnerable to chemo and radiotherapy. Anti-everything: Curcumin has been shown to exhibit antioxidant, anti-inflammatory, anti-aging, antiviral, antibacterial, antifungal, and anticancer activities. Not only can it help protect against types of lung damage, liver damage, heart failure, stomach ulcers, diabetes, high cholesterol, depression and other chronic illnesses, but it’s even used by herbalists to help alleviate gas, bloating and water retention! Simply put, this is a supplement that should be in everyone’s daily regime. Dosage, absorption and contraindications Turmeric is normally taken as a powdered extract standardized to contain 95% curcumin and related chemicals. The recommended dose is 300mg600 mg taken up to four times daily. NOTE: As turmeric is not readily bioavailable (absorbed), many health professionals encourage the use of bioperine (black pepper) and bromelain (an enzyme) along with curcumin to enhance its effectiveness. Bioperine can assist the absorption of nutrients, and bromelain, when taken on an empty stomach, has antiinflammatory effects as well. Consider trying one or both of these supplements with your turmeric first, as you may get away with a lower dose this way. Source Naturals brand, Turmeric Extract, has all three. If you have acid reflux, ulcers or bile duct obstructions, consult your physician before using turmeric, as it may increase the production of bile and stomach acid. Turmeric may also increase the effectiveness of blood thinners or drugs to lower blood sugar.

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Amazing

healthy you

advances

knee

in

replacements by Paul L. Burroughs, MD, the bone & joint surgery clinic

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9/30/11

9:04:39 AM

M

ost patients who have had a knee replacement say that “it is the best thing I have ever done.” Many recent developments will help advance the procedure even more. The total knee replacement is still the gold standard of treatment for patients with osteoarthritis of the knee. Many patients, however, can have success with a partial knee replacement. This less invasive choice is now an excellent option for those with arthritis or “wear and tear” that is concentrated in one area of the knee. Interestingly, orthopaedic surgeons in England have observed that patients with more widespread arthritis in the knee had the same successful outcomes with either a partial or a total knee replacement. So far the same research studies performed in the US are having the same conclusion. In the past, the only option for most people was a total replacement. Now more patients qualify for the partial knee replacement, which is less invasive and allows quicker recovery. For patients who require a total knee replacement, extraordinary advances continue to be made. before surgery is performed, patients are given a special MRI or CT scan which is used for both a more customized fitting and accurate placement of their knee implants. These scans are sent to the knee implant manufacturer, where the patient’s exact measurements are made and special instruments are constructed for their surgery. This state-of-the-art technology shortens the time in the operating room, allows more minimally invasive surgical techniques, and can extend the lifespan of the implant due to better alignment of the knee. For patients who qualify for the partial knee replacement, this same customized option as described above will be available sometime by the end of this year. Treating younger patients with arthritis, or wear and tear of their cartilage, has been a challenge because the healing potential of cartilage is limited and therefore the treatment of cartilage defects is imperfect. In the past, most patients with this condition were treated with a procedure called Microfracture, where small “drills holes” are made in the bone in the base of the defect to stimulate scar tissue to fill in the damaged area. This older technique has not been successful for most patients. A new advanced technique is now available for patients with cartilage defects. This technique uses live cartilage allograft, where living hypercellular immature cartilage transplants are used to replace the missing cartilage in the knee. This procedure has been shown to heal these defects with cartilage that much more closely resembles the patient’s normal joint cartilage. Advancements have been made in pain management for post-operative patients. The majority of the oral pain medications used in the past caused nausea, vomiting, itching, constipation, and were poorly tolerated. A new class of pain medication that is much less likely to cause these negative side effects is now available, which is good news for patients recovering from surgery. Today patients have access to state-of-theart knee replacements, enabling them to live a more active and pain-free life. midtownmag.com| 145

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healthy you

Understanding

Attention:

ADHD is More than a Four Letter Word by Beth Briere, MD, Success in Mind

A

ttention can be thought of as the conductor of an orchestra in that it does not actually create the thinking/learning (or music) of the mind, but it directs all the thinking players that are essential for learning, behaving, and regulating emotion. When attention is working well, a child is able to focus and deploy his brain’s assets efficiently and effectively. When a child is unable to concentrate, his strengths may not shine through and his challenges can become accentuated. Attention is complex and has multiple components. Some parts regulate the steady flow of “cognitive fuel” for learning, while others enable a child to filter out distractions and to focus on the most important things long enough and with sufficient intensity to use and understand them well. Another component of attention helps to process incoming information by connecting it to previously learned material, and helps to stimulate the brain so that it can stay engaged with information that is not inherently interesting or important to the receiver. The attention controls support learning in numerous ways. For example, concentrating well enhances a student’s memory for facts and strengthens his understanding of complicated language. A part of attention

also fosters high quality productivity, as it mobilizes a child’s ability to plan, to pace himself, and to monitor the progress of his output, so he can make changes as needed. The same is true for his behavior and social life; planning, pacing and monitoring are crucial and under the guidance of attention. Today, many children are diagnosed with attention deficits, so-called “ADD” or “ADHD”, but this label is a mixed blessing. While it conveys the fact that a child is struggling through no fault of his own, it dangerously oversimplifies him. There are 14 components of attention that vary independently, and knowing which particular aspects of attention work well and which need support is critical to developing the strategies necessary to enhance learning and life. The result of a deeper understanding of the different forms and manifestations of attentional strengths and weaknesses is an understanding of the child’s unique and specific “attention profile”, as well as the realization of the benefits and consequences of such a profile. For example, a child who processes incoming information superficially may miss details that can affect reading comprehension, but he might also become a visionary thinker who does not got bogged down in the

details. Further, a child whose mind is overly active may make too many connections to his own ideas during a class lecture, but may be able to think very creatively in the right setting. In addition, just about every student harboring attentional deficits also has other forms of learning difference. For instance, a child can have trouble with attention plus language, attention plus memory, or attention plus motor and spatial problems. Therefore, the care of those with attentional challenges demands tailor-made strategies that address the specific manifestations of their reduced attention control, enhance or bypass their other weak areas, and mobilize their assets and interests. We can help students regulate their attention controls and not eliminate the benefits they get from them. Medication may be helpful in some cases, but it is a mistake to think that it is ever the entire answer. Our goal needs to be the cultivation of a child whose conductor needs training to succeed and that requires more than a label of ADHD and medication. The product of this different approach is a happy and productive child who performs in his or her own way as a unique individual! If you want to learn more, please visit: www.success-in-mind.org/attention.

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Attention Controls Function

Definition

Mental Energy Control System

The set of attention controls that initiate and maintain the energy level needed for optimal learning and behavior

Alertness

An effective level of focused listening, watching, and concentrating

Mental Exertion

The flow of energy needed for cognitive work output (e.g., homework)

Sleep/Arousal Balance

Sleeping well at night and being sufficiently awake and alert during the day

Performance Consistency

A steady, reliable and predictable flow of the mental energy needed for dependable functioning (moment to moment, day to day, week to week)

Processing Control System

The set of attention controls for regulating the use of incoming information

Saliency Determination

Discriminating between important and unimportant information, avoiding distractions (also known as selective attention)

Processing Depth

Focusing with sufficient intensity to capture details (e.g., instructions)

Cognitive Activation

Excessive processing, or forming connections that are not particularly relevant to the topic at hand

Focal Maintenance

Sustaining concentration for the appropriate period of time (also known as attention span or sustained attention)

Satisfaction Control

Focusing sufficiently on activities or topics of moderate or low levels of interest; weak satisfaction control can lead to insatiability, or a constant desire for excitement and intense stimulation

Production Control System

The set of attention controls for regulating academic and behavioral output

Previewing

Anticipating/predicting likely outcomes of actions, events, and problems; planning how to solve a problem before starting to work

Facilitation/Inhibition

Selecting the best option before acting or starting a task; weak facilitation and inhibition leads to impulsivity

Pacing

Doing tasks at the most appropriate speed, without rushing

Self-Monitoring

Watching one’s own output and making necessary modifications; finding and correcting mistakes

Reinforceability

Using previous experience and feedback to guide current behavior and output

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healthy you

is this the

FLU? by anna Quinn harrelSon, Md, FastMed urGeNt Care

I

t is absolutely no fun and completely inconvenient to be sick. This time of year the flu seems to be everywhere, but how do you know if that’s what your sickness is? Colds and the flu are both caused by viruses and are very similar in other ways. both can cause congestion, cough and fever, making it difficult to discern the difference. Once you have decided you have the flu, it is important to seek medical care quickly. However, there are no effective medicines to stop a cold- you can only treat the symptoms and allow your body time to fight it. With the flu there are antivirals that can be prescribed to

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shorten the duration and lesson the severity of it if started within 48 hours of the onset of symptoms. These can only be prescribed by a doctor after a flu swab confirms the illness or exposure history plus symptoms. Early flu vaccination plays an important role in protecting yourself during the height of flu season. Many people believe that just getting the vaccine protects them from the flu, when in fact the timing of the vaccination is very important. It takes up to eight weeks for your body to develop the proper antibodies to defend against the flu. Flu season in our area of the country comes towards the end of

January and the beginning of February, which means you need to receive your vaccination in the month of November to be properly and effectively protected. The flu, if untreated, typically will run its course over a few week’s time, but can lead to more serious complications. Once the body’s immune system has been weakened and respiratory illness has set in, someone suffering from the flu is much more likely to get pneumonia, sinus infections, or worse. Therefore, it is important to get your flu shot every year and keep your immune system healthy with rest, proper nutrition and adequate hand washing!

Here are some simplified ways to help with the diagnosis: Cold

Flu

Runny nose

Overwhelming exhaustion

Congestion

Total body aches

Cough

Fever 101 or higher

Mild headache

Headache (worse than that from a cold)

Starts with one symptom then evolves

Comes on fast

Usually lasts about a week

Symptoms may linger for weeks

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midtown

mingles

CAM WARD AT BACKYARD BISTRO

On September 28th, Backyard Bistro hosted its first 99.9 The Fan Canes Corner with guest Cam Ward. The All-Star goalie was interviewed and then signed autographs for some of the Triangle’s biggest Hurricane fans.

PHOTOGRAPHY BY JOSIE R. HALL

ART IN THE GARDENS

On September 23rd and 24th, an Artists Reception was held at Duke Raleigh Hospital. Due to inclement weather, the parking deck was transformed into a garden to provide a dry place for the artists, visitors and guests. The event was sponsored by the Duke Raleigh Hospital Guild with proceeds being used to renovate Birdwood, a hospital hospitality house that will provide lodging, comfort and care for patients’ family members.

ADORE DESIGNER RESALE BOUTIQUE GRAND OPENING

ADORE Designer Resale Boutique held its grand opening on Saturday, September 24th at its North Raleigh store. Guests were treated to drinks and hors d’oeuvres. The festivities included a DJ, fashion show and drawings for prizes throughout the evening.

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J BRAND TRUNK SHOW

On October 13th, gena chandler at North Hills hosted a J Brand trunk show. Customers had one-on-one appointments with J Brand fit specialist Oscar Adams to find the perfect fit and wash for fall.

KILPATRICK TOWNSEND HOSTS OPEN HOUSE

On October 4th, Kilpatrick Townsend hosted a open house reception to celebrate their new office space in the CAPTRUST Tower in the heart of Midtown. They made a $10 donation on behalf of each guest to the American Cancer Society, the Boys & Girls Club of Wake County, Meals and Wheels of Wake County and the North Carolina Opera.

5TH ANNUAL NORTH HILLS 5K

On September 10th Trinity Baptist Church hosted the North Hills 5k benefiting North Raleigh Ministries. This year’s event included the 5k, 1-mile fun run, kids dash, and for the first, time the Pastor’s Challenge. Pastors from several of the area churches raced for the Pastor’s Cup. St. Mark’s United Methodist Church pastor Ben Williams took the cup home this year.

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midtown

mingles

WHALEBONE RUNWAY SHOW

On September 20th, Whalebone Urban Surf at North Hills hosted a fashion show featuring the latest looks for fall sportswear. Guests were treated to hors d’oeuvres and wine.

A “WHIRLED” PEACE

On September 21st millions of spinning pinwheels were placed along roadsides, in schoolyards and in parks to celebrate International Day of Peace. The St. Raphael Early Childhood Center (ECC) and Saint Raphael Catholic School took part in this international art and literacy project, Pinwheels for Peace, by “planting” pinwheels with messages of peace in front of the ECC and SRCS.

MONICA RICH KOSANN TRUNK SHOW

On October 14th Quintessentials at North Hills hosted a trunk show to introduce jewelry by Monica Rich Kosann. Kosann’s jewelry focuses on these two universal ideas. A locket captures a unique moment. A charm bracelet tells and celebrates a story of each woman’s life – in that way, it is like a fingerprint, totally unique to that woman.

MAIN AND TAYLOR & TYLER HOUSE EVENT

On September 8th, Main & Taylor Shoe Salon and Tyler House teamed up for an evening of fashion outfitting and fun. Tyler House pulled together some key looks for the season, and Main and Taylor paired the best boots and shoes to complete it. Guests enjoyed hors d’oeuvres, wine and a whole lot of fun!

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SOHO CONSIGNMENTS GRAND OPENING

SOHO Consignments held their Grand Opening on Saturday, October 1st. Guests enjoyed refreshments as they browsed the vast selection of home furnishings at the recently opened store.

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Gift guide mm tip in gift guide.indd 1

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01. Chan Luu Scarves $280 Anna & Alice A multitude of colors and patterns such as animal prints, stripes and metallics. 01

02. glo Body Kit $26.50 Aesthetica Face & Body A great gift for anyone on your list for the holidays. The glo Body Kit includes glominerals body products, lip balm and travel candle all in a soothing scent of honey sugar butter. 04

03. Custom Gift Basket $25 and up Antonio’s Gourmet Market Allow us to create a one -of-a-kind basket for the perfect holiday gift! Prices starting at $25 and up.

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04. Designer Umbrella $23.75 Affordable Chic All girls should be flirty and fabulous with a monogrammed Jimeale Jorgensen designer umbrella. Monogramming extra. Colors available: red/brown, pink/chocolate and lime/chocolate. 05

05. Cashmere Sweaters and Scarves Cameron Clothing Co. Come see the season’s largest selection. A gift sure to please anyone.

BEFORE

06. Juvederm® Blue Water Spa Donate $50 to the Boys and Girls Club this holiday and Receive $350 off Juvederm®.

AFTER

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07. Crow Watches $30/each Certain Things Crow Watches are the perfect gift for everybody on your list. With interchangable bands, these watches can add a pop of color & fun to everybody’s wardrobe.

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08. Nest Candles Atlantic Avenue Orchid & Garden Nest candles are an exquisite collection of fragrances which combine color, texture and fragrance to enhance your everyday living and entertaining experience.

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09. Sandy Duftler Belt $160 Kristen’s Place Black and sterling silver belt by Sandy Duftler.

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10. Vintage Perfume Bottle $180 SOHO Consignments WWII French reuseable perfume bottle with iridescent glass bottle and original label on bottom. Found in the streets of Paris after perfume shop was bombed in WWII.

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11. Camisole & Boxer Short $105 J. Alane’s Fine Lingerie Cozy Pima Cotton/modal Camisole & boxer short set by B*UP.

12. Paisley Painted Scarf $18 Gigi’s Boutique With endless ways to wear it, this paisley printed scarf in multi colors works well for all occasions, casual to dressy.

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13. Candles, Soaps and Sprays $29 Hunt & Gather Fine French candles, soaps and room sprays from Seda France. Great gift items, or treat yourself to something like Lavender Provencale at the end of a long day.

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14. Noteworthy Snap Stamp $38.99-$47.99 InvitationBox.com. Make your mark with the Noteworthy Snap Stamp. This stamp base allows you to customize stationery with multiple interchangeable face designs.

15. “Prince Charming” in a Box $85 Shabby Rose/Brenda Hardwick at Affordable Chic This is truly a unique one-of-a-kind find in accessories, or just plain vintage caroom! “Prince Charming” in a box, created with vintage & antique finds, will stimulate conversation as your USA designer piece of the year.

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16. Custom Confections $16 or $33/dozen The Cupcake Shoppe Let The Cupcake Shoppe make your holidays even sweeter with custom confections! Cupcakes! Cakes! cookies! Oh my!

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17. Embrace Xtreme $124.99 GNC, North Hills A 3-step, 45-day kit which increases metabolism, burns belly fat and detoxes. Special holiday price saves you $70 off the retail cost.

18. Seasons Bounty $95 (as shown) The English Garden Embrace the season with a lush presentation of roses, berries, hydrangea, dahlias, mums and branches designed in a rustic gilded cornucopia perfect for the holiday table.

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19. Sandrine Giraud Earrings $98, Necklace $220 C.T. Weekends Sandrine’s jewelry collection features flexible stainless steel with handmade ceramic, Murano glass and resin pearls in a broad range of colors. Her unique concept of design allows the wearer to create a new shape each time worn.

20. Manuel Canovas Candle $18 and up Eatmans Carpets & Interiors Use them at Christmas, as well as all year round! His scents are just as stunning as his fabrics.

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21. Theodora & Callum Caftan $198 gena chandler The perfect accessory to any outfit!

22. Hobo’s “ Rachel” $118 Comfortable Soles Hobo’s “Rachel” has top-grain Italian leathers, an assortment of colors and a well thought out interior that make it the perfect gift this holiday season!

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23. Cookbooks $28/each Geckos at Affordable Chic Use this set of scrumptous cookbooks to pass on the love language of food. Communicate to your family and friends your compassion through the entertaining, easy meals and meal plans.

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24. Infinity Scarf $25 Clothes Hound This luxurious infinity scarf is so versatile it’ll take any outfit up a few notches, so effortless you’ll be tempted to get one in every color.

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25. Rectangular Gate Frame Necklace $795 Quintessentials 18-inch open link chain sterling silver locket with five white sapphires or blue aquamarines. 1" in height. 26. Antonion Bernado Earrings $2,495 Hamilton HIll Jewelry “Aura” earrings in 18-karat yellow or white gold with a variety of gemstones. 27. Zeghani Neclacke $1,900 Jolly’s Jewelers By Simon G, the pendant incorporates rose, white, yellow gold, amethyst, lemon quartz and white sapphires.

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28. David Yurman Bracelet $280 ADORE Designer Resale Boutique David Yurman sterling silver 5mm cable bracelet with 14-karat gold embellishment. Retail $520. 29. Designer Inspired Bangles $59/each The Elaine Miller Collection Pair them with your favorite bracelet, wear them alone, or stack them by the armful. 30. John Wind Signature Bracelet $80 I’ Elégance du Maison at Affodable Chic All initials available. The perfect gift for special occasions. Available in gold or silver.

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31. Trollbeads Goldmine Jewelry Shoppe Be inspired by the shimmering hues of a winter morning, or create your own holiday memories. 32. Coin Necklace $79 The Elaine Miller Collection 48 inches of coins and chain, it is just right with everything from sweaters to suits. 33. Foxy Original Jewelry $38-$72 Hayley’s Boutique Bronze, gold and silver finishes. Classic designs that match any outfit – casual to holiday. 29 30

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34. Gold Gemstone & Diamond Bangles $595 Bailey’s Fine Jewelry From the IPPOLITA Rock Candy® Wisteria Collection, 18-karat gold gemstone and diamond bangles. 35. Sterling Silver Hand Engraved Jewelry Charlotte’s Engraving prices vary. Locket pictured ($280).

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36. Laurel Brooch $45 The Elaine Miller Collection With crown intaglio in vintage jet or royal blue.

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37. Classic “Jax” Necklace $145 The Elaine Miller Collection The perfect accompaniment to any outfit. 38. Sparkle & Shine! $90 The Elaine Miller Collection These fabulous earrings have red carpet glamour.

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39. Red Cocktail Ring $44 Kristen’s Shoes Gorgeous and stunning. You will shine with this accesory. 40. Bangle Bracelets $45 Diamonds Direct Crabtree 18-karat yellow gold bangle style bracelets containing multicolored rose cut diamonds weighing 2.75-4.39 karats.

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41. Kate Spade Evening Jacket $147 Nora and Nicky’s Designer Resale Kate Spade short-sleeved three button silver evening jacket with wide cowl style collar. It goes beautifully with a little black dress and coordinating pumps! Original retail price – $325.

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42. Yarbie Bangles $45-$90 Vermillion Handmade by North Carolina native Elizabeth Yarborough, Yarbie Bangles are woven with fine novelty textiles including cashmere, silk, linen and angora. Yarbie Bangles are designed for all wrists, climates and occasions for a simple statement or infinite versatility of mixing and matching.

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43. Davines Voluminous Winter Hair Kit $120 Lux Salon Your essential winter hair regimen is here! Pump up your hair and add control to flyaways.

44. Custom Pet Portraits $125 and up Design Studio at Affordable Chic Shops Betty Dunham’s “Nelson,” Black Lab, 8"x10" acrylic on canvas. Pet portraits starting at $125, unframed. Original landscapes, seascapes and still lifes also available.

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45. The Bubble Lamp Nowell’s Contemporary Furniture of Cary The “Bubble Lamp,” by George Nelson (1947) has been called the perfect lamp, and with good reason.

46. Lucy Accessories $20 and up Revolver Consignment Boutique Made of money earrings with French coin ($39). Sticks & stones etched metal cuffs. Large copper ($48), small silver ($20).

47. Sonicare Toothbrush $128 Renaissance Dental Center #1 recommended brand. Includes a UV brush head sanitizer. Get a healthier mouth with gentle technology!

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48. Cotton Comfort Set CoolSweats Waffle hoodie, deep vee sweatshirt & zip funnel sweatshirt. 100% super soft cotton! Washable & dryable too! Available in many colors and sizes S through XL.

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49. Nursing PJ Set $128 Love in Bloom A cute and cozy set by Olian with matching floral-pink print outfits. 50

50. Lady Primrose’s Celadon $97/$33 Lavender and Lace The emerald aromas of Italian Bergamot and Crisp Lemons makes Lady Primrose’s Celadon a favorite. A super-enriched moisturizer will leave the skin soft and invigorated. Decanter ($97), Candle ($33).

51. Flud Watches $50/$95 Dapper Style House Women’s sea foam plastic watch with colored face detail ($50). Men’s wooden (oak) watch by with interchangeable black and white bands ($95).

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52. Tory Burch Collection $185 and up Monkee’s of Raleigh Animal print is a classic in any women’s closet, and a must-have for the holidays. Snow leopard city wristlet, ($185), leopard kendrick driver ($295) and cheetah sally wedge ($295).

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53. Quilted Leather Handbag $425 Le Feme Chateau Pinehurst Gorgeous from Italy! Black quilted leather handbag...a classic. Many other colors available!

54. Academic Assessment $495 Success in Mind Pinpoint your child’s specific strengths and challenges in learning to experience genuine success in school. A prioritized academic assessment includes an individualized learning plan for home and for school.

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55. Lollia Bath Collection $7.50 and up Luxe Beauty Boutique Give the gift of calm this holiday. Lollia’s bath range has something for everyone on your list.

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56. Giclee-Art Printed Trays $68 Zest Cafe & Home Art Stunning assortment of lacquer finished giclee-art printed trays! Both whimsical and serene, these 15"x15" trays are great for gifts and for your home.

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57. Cashmere Sweater, Shirt $345/$150 Varsity Men’s Wear A worsted cashmere sweater (Peter Millar) and shirt (Turrau) make the perfect combination this holiday. Sweater available in an array of colors.

58. Wine Bottle Gift Box $25 Vinos Finos y Picadas A perfect gift for anyone who enjoys a bottle of wine. The handsome wood box protects the bottle of your choosing, allowing a beautiful presentation upon arriving at the destination. The useful tools include a label protection ring as well as a corkscrew.

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59. Fashionable Accessories $39 and up Shops of Baileywick Beautiful hand-crocheted scarf, made from soft cotton blend yarn, embellished with glass pearls and bows, with a removable hand pearled floral brooch ($79). Elegant black knit scarf, trimmed with faux fur and fringe ($39).

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60. Bumble & Bumble Hair Products Modern Enhancement Salon & Day Spa Treat your loved one to fuller, thicker hair with the Bumble & Bumble Thickening line of hair products. If that’s not good enough, try our quality hair extensions!

61. A Christmas Carol Tickets Theater in the Park Give the gift of entertainment with tickets to see A Christmas Carol in Raleigh at Memorial Auditorium December 8th-14th. Available at theatreinthepark.com.

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62. Dakine Luggage $185 and up Whalebone Urban Surf For men and women. Split roller (small $185, large $195). Various sizes and prints. Great for holiday jet-setting!

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63. Color Changing Scarf $28 Ten Thousand Villages A scarf full of color that changes in the light. Handmade by fairly paid artisans in India using environmentally friendly dyes.

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64. Feuillatte Palmes D’Or Brut Total Wine & More For that special person. Champagne at its best. Coastline Cabernet Gift Basket: Crackers, cheese and wine. A great holiday gift. 65

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65. Dressing Table $245 and up Revival Antiques Give the gift of a new family heirloom. Several styles of dressing tables are in stock now to custom finish for holiday giving.

66. Maybe a Cupcake? $10.99 or $29.50/dozen Smallcakes Cupcakery Let a treat from SmallCakes make everyone on your list happy during the holidays.

67. The Twelve Days of Christmas in North Carolina $12.95 North Hills Bookery A book makes a great gift for any child on your list. A large selection of puzzles, toys and books for adults and children too! 68. Customizable Gift Basket $20 and up Tin Roof Teas Customized gift baskets for any tea lover include a teapot, their favorite teas, Savannah bee honey and gourmet chocolates or tea cookies.

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69. Wonderful Holiday Gifts Skin Sense, A Day Spa Bring balance to the lives of everyone with a wonderful Holiday gift from the spa boutique.

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70. Winter Installation Special Pool Professionals Take advantage of our Winter Installation Special! All contracts signed by December 31st, 2011 will receive a 5% discount – up to $5,000 off.

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gift cards

THE OXFORD The Oxford offers a step above traditional “pub grub”. The cuisine is made from scratch with honest ingredients. SONO A Japanese restaurant with a vibrant interior, tasty sushi and impeccable service. Exotic fish are imported to provide you the best sashimi choices in town.

Can’t find that ever-so-perfect gift? Sometimes it’s best to let our loved ones decide for themselves. COQUETTE Coquette features an exclusively French wine list, the best of beers, and classic French cocktails along with traditional brasserie meals. Bon appétit!

SECOND EMPIRE Offering a holiday (and everyday) dining experience that combines an atmosphere of classical history and elegance with a selection of cuisine that is as exquisitely unique as it is delicious.

LADYFINGERS CATERERS No matter what the occasion, Ladyfingers Caterers can customize a menu to fit your taste and budget.

SAINT-JACQUES The South of France is now only minutes away! Come dine at the only French restaurant in town, owned by a French native from Provence.

BARLEY & VINE Whether you need a Bordeaux or a Chardonnay for your hostess, this full-service wine shop can make your choice easy with a tasting bar that opens every day at 4pm.

THE MEAT HOUSE Give the gift of a delicious and memorable meal with a gift card to your neighborhood butcher. With each $25 card purchase, you will receive a $5 card for yourself, or take 20% off your total gift card purchase for your whole staff.

VIVACE Italian cuisine such as Grilled Mahi Mahi and Crab Agnolotti served in a stylish, contemporary North Hills atmosphere makes a great gift.

CAFE TIRAMISU You’ll be thrilled with the traditional Northern Italian menu, but don’t overlook the signature items such as Osso Buco and Fried Mozzarella Souffle.

MIA FRANCESCA Enjoy the classic, rustic Italian menu which includes Gnocci Bolognese and Pesce Pagliacci.

FOOD & DRINK

Cameron bar & grill Cameron Bar & Grill offers straightforward American cuisine, located in the lovely, historic Cameron Village. CHEF MARIO The ultimate care package! Chef Mario’s Personal Chef Meal Delivery packages start at just $185, which includes dinner for two, for 5 days!

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of consumers plan to buy gift cards as a gift

MIDTOWN GRILLE Enjoy regionally-inspired, creative cuisine in an intimate dining setting or a cocktail after work in the heart of North Hills. MURA Mura merges sushi and steak under the same roof. They not only provide a fusion of foods, but also a blend of Eastern and Western cultures in order to create a metropolitan atmosphere.

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%   of consumers

would like to recieve one

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DAVIS PLASTIC SURGERY Give yourself a gift and discover a new you! Let Davis Plastic Surgery assist you in obtaining the physical appearance you are striving for! DS PARADA Give the gift of color! dsparada COLOR SALON is an award-winning salon right here in Raleigh.

FITNESS 02 FITNESS Look great, feel even better! Whether you’re seeking a personal trainer in Cary or are simply looking for a clean, upscale fitness club in Raleigh to enhance or begin an exercise regimen, O2 Fitness has something for you. METABOLIC RESEARCH CENTER Get that jump start on the new year and give someone you care about a 6 weeks for $99 gift card! Lose up to 30 pounds. Make 2012 your “I Did It Year!”

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LAMBETH Lambeth Plastic Surgery offers clients the seasoned expertise of an accomplished and caring specialist. Not only does Lambeth offer surgical procedures – they do facials, too!

HOMEWOOD NURSERY Homewood offers top quality, locally grown plants that will make your recipient think of you every time they see their lush yard.

RALEIGH HAIR CONCEPTS Fabulous hair makes a great gift! Raleigh Hair Concepts specializes in corrective hair solutions and hair extensions! RALEIGH PLASTIC SURGERY Raleigh Plastic Surgery Center offers a wide range of aesthetic & reconstructive surgical procedures. Feeling beautiful is a gift in itself! SALON BLU Give cutting-edge style in a trend-setting hair boutique this year. Feeling pampered is Salon Blu’s highest priority.

ENTERTAINMENT

VON KEKEL Striving to bring harmony and balance to their guests, Von Kekel enhances inner and outer beauty while calming the mind and warming the soul.

CAROLINA BALLET Give the gift of ballet. With shows like Balanchine Rarities and Beethoven: Symphony No. 9, you’ll be touted as the number one gift-giver!

BEAUTY

HOME

CLOTHING

A YOUNGER YOU Put your best face forward! The Non-Surgical Face Lift makes a great gift. Who wouldn’t want a face lift that doesn’t require surgery?

AN HOUR WITH STACEY An hour of professional interior design direction is a gift that gives all year round. An hour is really all you need!

BRA PATCH Find something sexy for you or your mate. The Bra Patch specializes in hard-to-fit, custom and Le Mystere bras featured on Oprah.

the average value of a gift card

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there is more than

8,

$

000,000,000 in unredeemed gift cards

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