Search South Aurora Magazine February 2021

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FEBRUARY 2021

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CONTENT ISSUE NO. 157 | FEBRUARY 2021

FEATURE 10 |

LONELY HEARTS CLUB Sometimes bad dates happen to good people.

Enjoy a few reallife romantic flop stories.

DEPARTMENTS 8 |

BY THE NUMBERS - Can’t Buy Me Love

14 |

EDITOR’S TAKE - Love Thy Neighbor

NE TREE LO

Tr e e

Town Rock PA R K E R

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Whether you share a box of chocolates with your significant other, or your significant other is a box of chocolates, enjoy our Valentine's Day "by the numbers"

8 SEARCHSOUTHAURORA | FEBRUARY 2021

1600s CAN'T BUY 1840 ME When Europeans started exchanging valentines

When the first valentines were mass-produced and sold in the U.S.

11,000 The average number of children conceived on Valentine's Day

24%

of single people buy themselves a gift for Valentine's Day

198 billion The average number of roses produced for the holiday

14 %

of women send themselves flowers on Valentine's Day

1913

When Hallmark began massproducing valentines in the U.S.

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Lonely Hearts Club Not all dating experiences have a "happily-ever-after" ending Stories as told to Search South Aurora Staff

10 SEARCHSOUTHAURORA | FEBRUARY 2021

Getting to know someone romantically can leave you feeling… drained.

If you’ve ever felt like love is a battlefield, have no fear we’ve all been there.

Sometimes bad dates happen to good people.

Enjoy a few romantic flops from our favorite people.

You’re welcome, and no, we’re not sorry for sharing.

“Bre and I were on our first date. The server brought us our food and my very first bite of steak got stuck in my throat.

I was not choking; but couldn’t dislodge the steak. I took a drink of water but ended up discretely spitting the water back into my glass because it wouldn’t go down.

I quietly excused myself and went to the bathroom.

After about ten minutes one of my friends came to the bathroom to check on me. He asked if we should try the Heimlich maneuver. He knocked the wind out of me two or three times to no avail. Realizing that I had no choice, we headed to the ER. For the next hour we all sat in the waiting room. A nurse finally informed me that I needed to have a procedure to remove the obstruction and would have to be sedated, which means one of my friends needed to stay

and drive me home. My date, Bre, volunteered and my buddies left to take their dates home.

The doctor sedated me and removed the steak from my throat. The next thing I knew, I heard familiar voices saying my name and laughing. As I slowly woke up, my vision cleared and I saw my friends, my brother Dave, and Bre all smiling at me. Apparently I kept saying, ‘My doctor is a terrorist, we need to call Jack Bauer!’”

I finally got Bre back home about 1:00 in the morning. I don’t remember if I walked Bre to the door that night, but we did go out again and actually dated briefly.

- That wasn’t a love connection, but Jason is now happily married and his wife cuts all his steak into little pieces.

FEBRUARY 2021 | SEARCHSOUTHAURORA 11

"My first official date with Amanda - When I called her on the way to pick her up she let me know that she had invited another one of her guy friends (Sam) to join us for dinner. He showed up and chatted it up all night. After dinner, he realized he forgot his wallet. Amanda ended up paying for him. True story ... awesome first date."

- Jeremy ended up marrying Amanda. He now pays for the whole meal almost every time.

"Once, my date rear-ended someone so hard that I spent the next couple of months going to physical therapy for my neck and back. We worked together, so we saw each other every day ... wasn't awkward at all."

- Melanie is a wife and mother of three. She is a very cautious driver.

"First date with a guy and he takes me to one of those bounce house/obstacle course type places. While we were jumping I looked down and noticed that the crotch seam on my pants was coming apart. I quickly excused myself and went to the front desk to ask for a stapler to fix the tear. They had a stapler, but no staples.

The best they could do was some scotch tape. I tried the best I could to close the gap, but the tape basically did nothing at all and the hole grew throughout the night.

My date never said if he ever noticed, but we never went out again."

- Autumn married the man of her dreams and carries staples with her everywhere she goes.

"As we left the small restaurant where we had just eaten, I noticed a car that looked just like mine being loaded up on a tow truck. It was my car. I pleaded with the guy to leave it and he made me pay $70. I had $75 total in my account, so after I paid for the car, the date was over. I took her home.

Another time, my date and I drove to an outdoor area for a nature walk. As we walked through a big field I realized I had dropped my keys. After a long time searching, my date had to walk home alone while I continued to search. I finally found them, and my date got more of a nature walk than she wanted."

"I asked a girl out that I had seen on campus. The date went fine and we enjoyed ourselves so much that I called her back for a second date. A man answered the phone and I asked to speak to the girl. The man asked who I was. I answered and then asked who he was, to which he replied he was her husband. I immediately hung up. Several weeks later I called back to make sure it wasn't a joke played by her brother or friend. The number had been disconnected. I ran into the girl later on campus and she admitted that she was married."

- Steve enjoyed it so much that now he only dates a married women - his wife.

"One of my roommates went on a date with a guy who started clipping his toenails while they were watching a movie at his apartment. It wasn't into a trash can. He just let the clippings land on the coffee table in front of them. Then he asked her if she wanted to clip HIS nails.

She said no. They never went out again."

- Suzanne is married and raising her beautiful kids to only clip their own nails.

"I was asked out by a guy I knew in high school and he bought us tickets to a Denver Nuggets game for our first date. I was 17 at the time and this was one of my first dates ever. I didn't have a car, so he picked me up. We drove to the game, got our seats, and made small talk as the game started.

After about 45 minutes he excused himself to use the bathroom. Ten minutes later, he wasn't back yet and I figured there was a line at the men's room. I sat there alone through halftime and I finally went out to his car to look for him. It was gone. He had ditched me. I can't prove it, but I'm pretty sure he left with some girl he'd known in the stands."

- Emily has a new boyfriend who has yet to leave her stranded at a ball game.

"My first date ever the guy's parents came with us and sat in the back seat. They recorded the whole car drive"

"My date and I were in the back row seat of a large SUV on our way to an amusement park. My date began to look nautious and asked if we could pull over. I told my buddy to pull over but he was in the far left lane on the freeway. They passed back a small chip bag but it wasn't in time. My date was throwing up all over. She was trying to catch it with her hands, but it was getting everywhere. She filled up the chip bag and it overflowed.

We dropped her and the other girls off at the mall to buy new clothes because it got all over hers. Then the guys drove to a gas station and used wet wipes to clean up the car. "

- Amanda didnt give him or his parents another chance.

- Spencer is now engaged to be married, just not to her.

- James is still searching for that perfect someone who loves cars and long walks in nature.

12 SEARCHSOUTHAURORA | FEBRUARY 2021

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E D I TO R ' S TA K E

BY SEARCH SOUTH AURORA STAFF

I have come to dislike the phrase Falling in Love.

Sorry hopeless romantics. It’s not that I am against the notion, I “fell” in love with my wife 23 years ago and I fall more in love with her every day. What I object to is the connotation that falling in love evokes. It makes it feel arbitrary, out of our control even. Something that happens to you against your will. The reason I object to the phrase is because if you accept involuntarily being made to fall into love, doesn’t that mean that you can just as unwittingly fall OUT of love?

Love is a choice.

I think that is true for all kinds of love; romantic, sibling, and even neighborly. Love in any form is never easy, at least not the lasting kind. Being willing to so easily accept “falling out” of love is a coward’s way of escape. And it is prevalent in the world we live in. Especially among neighbors. Why do we have such contempt for our neighbors and community members that have a different view than us?

I love this parable about why sometimes we choose not to love our neighbor.

14 SEARCHSOUTHAURORA | FEBRUARY 2021

A couple sat at their kitchen table to indulge in a delicious breakfast. The wife looked out the window and saw her neighbor hanging laundry on the clothesline.

“Her laundry is never clean!’”she said to her husband. “Someone needs to teach her a thing or two when it comes to washing her clothes!”

Day after day, the wife would complain to her husband about their neighbors’ dirty laundry. One morning, as they enjoyied their breakfast, she noticed something was different.

“Wow, look!” the surprised wife said to her husband, “Her clothes are clean! Someone must have taught her how to wash her clothes!” Without raising his head from his plate, the husband kindly responded, “Actually, honey, I got up early this morning and washed the window.”

And so it is with life - what we see when watching others depends on the window through which we look. Have more patience, more empathy, more understanding ... and choose to love.

No one remembers you for standing in the crowd.

But they do remember you for standing out from it.

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