Misprint's Guide To FunFunFunFest 2011

friday (cont.)

saturday (cont.)

EMPIRE AUTOMOTIVE

EMPIRE AUTOMOTIVE

doors 9:30 pm

Neon Indian DJ set, Purity Ring, Memoryhouse, Keep Shelly in Athens, TBA DJ doors 9:30 pm

Kool Keith, Death Grips, Blackie, Trash Talk, TBA

CLUB DEVILLE

Dead Confederate, Cartright, TBA doors 8:30 pm

saturday MOHAWK

Outside: Felice Brothers, Gill Landry (Old Crow Medicine Show), Old Man Markley Inside: Paper Hotel, The Sour Notes, Pat Jordache, ANR doors 9 pm

RED 7

Brought to you by Brooklyn Vegan and T.E.

Outside: Russian Circles, Tera Melos, Boris, Ancient VVisdom Inside: Deafheaven, Eagle Claw, Watching The Moon doors 9 pm

BEAUTY BAR

Industry & Artists DJ Sets doors 9 pm

ND

DJ Thibault, Future Rock, Gobi, American Royalty doors 10 pm

THE PARISH

Mates of State, Generationals, Yellow Ostrich, Front Bottoms doors 9:30 pm

Brought to you by Gorilla vs Bear and T.E.

CLUB DEVILLE

Budos Band, Hardproof Afrobeat doors 9 pm

sunday MOHAWK

Inside: Zero Boys, Night Siege, Rituals (ex You People) doors 9:30 pm

RED 7

Outside: DOM, Royal Bangs, Pujol, Bearhands

doors 9:30 pm

BEAUTY BAR

Austra DJ Set, Dengue Fever doors 9:30 pm

BEERLAND

Thee Oh Sees, Total Control, CH 24, David Liebe Hart (Tim & Eric Awesome Show) doors 9:30 pm

EMPIRE AUTOMOTIVE

Syd the Kid DJ set (OFWGKTA), G-Side, DJ Orion & Kid Slyce, TBA, DJ set doors 9:30 pm

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fun fun fun fest 201i

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directors

contact

Harvey Merrybottom

www.misprintmagazine.com hollaback@misprintmagazine.com

Director of Co-Conspiritories

Chadwick Pennyrich III

Director of Visual Arts & Languages

Bronx Wontgomery Director of Intern R&D

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Misprint Magazine c/o The Side Bar (seriously)

A Few Words from Misprint... as all two longtime readers of Misprint Magazine know, we’ve spent a lot of hot

brown ink talking about Austin as a city in flux. Now, with the sixth annual Fun Fun Fun Fest and the sixth year of Misprint, both of us are growing up. Misprint started as a few dudes with a dream of a scrappy, photocopied ‘zine full of dick jokes. Now, six years later, we’ve grown into a massive, corporate-sponsored magazine full of dick jokes. Fun Fun Fun Fest has likewise come a long way from humble beginnings. I remember that first year, when the festival was just five sad dudes huddled around a barrel of burning trash sharing a can of cold beans and a bottle of Ripple while listening to the guys from Spoon strum Woody Guthrie tunes. Now, six years later, Slayer is floating in Ladybird Lake in a spike covered submarine, Okkervil River is planning to shoot $50 bills into the crowd out of their french horns and Henry Rollins has promised to wrestle a steer for charity.

Also, in what surely came as a complete shock to absolutely everyone, the crack staff of Transmission Entertainment, (whose only skills seem to be setting up kiddie pools on the roof of the Mohawk and overpouring your whiskey shots), have somehow coordinated the logistical miracle of transporting FFF over land to Auditorium Shores. With Housheng astride a mighty Oliphant at the lead, a mad and motley procession of superstar beardos, demi-pro wrestlers and Eurobungie enthusiasts slogged their way to the promised land.

I’ll never forget the crazed look in Klaus Kinski’s eyes as he fired up that cranky old diesel engine underneath the orange stage to haul it down Red River street, over the capitol grounds to its new home.

Honestly, it was such an emotional sight the entire Misprint staff took a break from hatching elaborate schemes to end live music and drinking Pimm’s on our jetskis to create this, our second annual guide to the festival. We figured you might need some help navigating the sights and smells of the new seaside FFF. And besides, if it’s going to be around another year, there’s got to be someone to make fun of it.

See you at the black stage, chubies!

XOXO, we don’t love to hate. we hate what we love.

PS: Graham, thanks again for all those band bios! I don’t even like music anymore so I couldn’t have written any of them. We need to talk about the serious lack of Municipal Waste.

ORANGE STAGE Passion Pit: Boston-based Passion Pit’s catchy, youthful electro-pop has skyrocketed them to indie fame in the last 2 years. What started out as a Valentine’s gift of songs to a girlfriend lead to a release of the songs on Les Savy’s French Kiss Records and almost immediately an even larger deal with Colombia. Fans of: MGMT, Phoenix, Animal Collective Clap Your Hands Say Yeah: Back in 2005, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah were one of the biggest acts in America that had yet to join a record label. Although they eventually signed, their music remains unconventional indie-pop that new listeners can find easily accessible. Fans of: Talking Heads, Modest Mouse, Yo la Tengo Okkervil River: Austin’s Okkervil River are the pitch-perfect medium between indie rock and folk rock. From all their amazing Jagjaguwar releases to putting out a record and touring with Rocky Erickson, Okkervil proves their ability and range time and again. Fans of: Neutral Milk Hotel, vests, birding, skeins of trees, thesauruses Black Joe Lewis & the Honeybears: Austin based Black Joe Lewis and the Honeybears create funky-retro-blues-inspired rock that term “garage soul”. Their melodies are groovy and their lyrics are laced with raunchy, subtle humor. Fans of: James Brown, Holwin’ Wolf, Quality Seafood The Thermals: Indie rock with that pop punk back bone everyone loves. Catchy, upbeat and driving, Thermals are a perfect nod to 90s nostalgia with a modern sound. Fans of: Superchunk, Guided By Voices, Times New Viking

Heartless Bastards: Indie garage rock with a tinge of alt country and some true power in singer/lead songwriter Erika Wennerstrom’s voice.

There’s melody and beauty in the music, but a powerful undertone that is pure RnR. Fans of: Patti Smith, MC5, Elvis Costello Ocote Soul Sound: The songwriting team of Adrian Quesada (Grupo Fantasma) and Martin Perna (Antibalas) bring a unique blend to modern independent music. Mixing vintage afro Cuban, funk and soul with a modern taste and sound.

Fans of: Antibalas, Budos Band, Buena Vista Social Club, Tropicalia Cloud Nothings: Cleveland’s Dylan Baldi makes catchy lo fi power pop/indie punk. Perfect blend of melody and dirty hooks. Fans of: Superchunk, WAVVES, No Age Jim Ward (Sparta/ATDI): Jim Ward, guitarist and founding member of At The Drive In/Sparta, has still made his home in El Paso, TX. And his sound reflects it now. An indie singer-songwriter sound of Americana from West Texas. Fans of: Bruce Springsteen, Old 97s, Wilco, El Paso Canon Blue: This Tennessee act has an indietronic sound that recently landed them on Temporary Resistance Records. Originally touring with UK’s Boxer Rebellion, who had to cancel their tour and FFF, we’re so glad Canon Blue was still able to make it! Fans of: Boards of Canada, Jonsi, Grizzly Bear TV Torso: TV Torso is a band of friendly Texans with an affinity for skewed pop, repetition, skeletal guitar music, minimalism, tuning drum sets and recording guitar direct. Fans of: French Kicks, Sound Team, Division Day Hum: The Illinois based post rock band helped define the genre and sounds in the 90s. The commercial hit “Stars” was both heavy and

beautiful at the same time. The mix of loud, feedback drone with post rock/space background and style, along with others of the decade helped bring the sound of underground music forward.

Fans of: Quicksand, Sunny Day Real Estate, My Bloody Valentine, Myst Architecture in Helsinki: Using everything from glockenspiels to hand claps, Australian group Architecture in Helsinki makes fun loving “modernist pop.” Fans of: Islands, David Byrne, Animal Collective, Paul Hogan, criminals Ted Leo and the Pharmacists: Ten years after releasing their debut LP, The Pharmacists have not lost any steam. With the recent release of “Brutalist Bricks” the band has once again reinvented itself with a new lineup and new explorations of their already eclectic repertoire.

Fans of: Squeeze, Superchunk, being really nice, Elvis Costello, Split Enz, percocet Budos Band: Ten-piece Daptone Records artist, Budos Band, are self-proclaimed “afro-soul”, combining vintage African Ethiopian sounds with 60s and early 70s funk and soul. Fans of: Stax Records, Fela Kuti, Sharon Jones and the Dapkings Mates of State: Husband and wife indie pop duo Mates of State are notable for their male/female vocal harmony, shifting rhythms and quirky song structure. Tempos are nearly always fast, with beats often resembling those found in electronic club or dance music. Fans of: Built to Spill, Death Cab for Cutie, punching yourself in the balls We Were Promised Jetpacks: They have been marked by the emotive voice of singer Adam Thompson and driving guitars, but recording their latest album in Sigur Ros’ Icelandic studio allowed them to literally find their rhythm. Fans of: Frightened Rabbit, Arctic Monkeys, jetpacks

Asobi Seksu: Tokyo slang for playful sex, Asobi Seksu is a fusion of Japanese, English, glitz, shoegazing, pop and style. Fans of: My Bloody Valentine, Yo La Tengo, Sonic Youth Le Butcherettes: Denver-born yet Mexicanbred, frontwoman Teri Gender Bender founded Le Butcherettes in Mexico. Boasting members and contributors from the Locust, Joan of Arc and Mars Volta, look out for the melee of feather dusters, brooms, aprons, fake blood, flour, eggs, meat, bubbles and maybe even a real pig’s head. Fans of: Sylvia Plath, Ted Hughes, Malcolm X, The Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Bikini Kill Lemuria: Lemuria’s sweet sounding post-punk with pop sensibilities is unlike anything out there right now. The band has released a myriad of splits, 7”s and two full-length LPs. Fans of: Superchunk, Get Up Kids, Discount, The Thermals Crooks: Crooks digs up deeply planted Texas country roots and dusts them off with lonesome guitar, southwestern horns and Josh Mazour’s equal parts aching and rowdy vocals. Fans of: Hank Williams Sr, Buck Owens, Johnny Cash Spoon: Spoon have been blending post-punk and pop sounds since their first release in 1995.

These Austin Legends have gained critical acclaim for their minimal ubiquitously cool sound. They headlined the very first FFF in 2006 and return to christen the new FFF location for their only show in 2011. Fans of: Pixies, The Matrix, The National, black button-ups, adorable Japanese robots, automotive vandalism Lykke Li: The Swedish songstress teamed up with Bjorn (of Peter, Bjorn and John), bringing her indie pop sound to more electro pop with a dark overtone. The new record’s operatic sound has brought major attention this year. Fans of: Peter Bjorn and John, Robyn, socialized medicine

Girls: Girls is a band full of guys who sing about the truth, love, heartbreak and pizza. Whether you’re in love, heartbroken, don’t believe in love, or want to know how it feels to feel either way, this San Francisco band is your ultimate go to band. Fans of: Cults (the band & Children of God), Best Coast, Love M83: French electro guru, Anthony Gonzalez, has made no qualms about influences of krautrock from the 70s and Brian Eno’s work, but his sound is far more modern. Electro with smooth indie rock beats and catch rhythms bring and almost “sing-along” feel to his music. Fans of: Four Tet, Delorean, Air Ra Ra Riot: Ra Ra Riots Alt/Indie Rock sound, with a touch of chamber pop, poppy upbeats, eclectic string sections and catchy vocals will have listeners dancing in no time. Fans of: Vampire Weekend, What Made Milwaukee Famous tUnE-yArDs: The brain child of Merrill Garbus, the tUnE-yArDs mix interesting elements of drum loops, ukuleles, and electric bass that are contrasted by Garbus extraordinary voice. The final product is an earnest melding of afro-pop, R&B and thought provoking lyrics. Fans of: Sonic Youth, Caribou, The Very Best, Jens Lekman The Joy Formidable: Hailing all the way from North Wales, childhood friends Ritzy Bryan and Rhydian Dafydd split from their previous band and started The Joy Formidable. These shoegaze/alt/ indie-rockers have created buzz around the US while sharing the stage with the likes of Passion Pit. Fans of: Yeah Yeah Yeah’s, Arcade Fire, The Naked and Famous, Sugarcubes Tinariwen: A band of Tuareg musicians from the Sahara Desert region of northern Mali formed

in 1979. Since 2001 they have played over 700 concerts in Europe, North America, Japan and Australia. Fans of: Ali Farka Toure, Fool’s Gold, Peter Gabriel Joe Lally (Fugazi): Founding Fugazi bass player Joe Lally helped define the bands legacy with his distinctive sound and rhythmic progressions.

His solo project doesn’t fail to meet the same standards, but takes its own direction. Fans of: Fugazi, Sonic Youth, Wugazi Future Islands: Greenville heroes, Future Islands, have a minimalist sound of the electro new wave, synthpop persuasion. Their debut album came full of dancy pop influences and jarring aesthetics combined with singer Herring’s powerful voice.

Fans of: Weekend, Postal Service, Dan Deacon Keep Shelly In Athens: This new Greek downtempo electronica band will be making its US debut at FFF. After putting out a single on GorillavsBear’s label Forest Family, the band has created quite a buzz. Fans of: M83, Neon Indian, Delorean Maneja Beto: Indie en Español from Austin, Texas. Maneja Beto occupies the universe where Joy Division meets up with Café Tacuba in an East Austin cantina and riff on Eno-era Talking Heads songs. Fans of: Cafe Tacuba, Los Amigos Invisibles, Joy Division Blonde Redhead: Alt-rock/dream pop trio based out of New York. Known for their discordant guitars, alternate tunings and stiffly dignified lyrics.

The band is comprised of the twin Italian Pace brothers and Japanese crooner Kazu Makino. Fans of: Sonic Youth, Autolux, Deerhoof, male models

BLACK STAGE Danzig Legacy: Glen Danzig’s career spans from Misfits to Samhain to Danzig. This is one of only a few shows where Danzig brings us a look from past to present doing 90 mins including three sets consisting of Danzig, Samhain and Misfits, complete with many of the original members. Fans of: skulls, skull collecting, bibliophilia, cat food, Jackie O, shitty horror movies Murder City Devils: A Seattle based garage punk band formed in the mid-90s and toured with everyone from Pearl Jam to their buddy band, At The Drive In. They brought classic RnR punk a la Stooges and Dead Boys to the decade with a dark, almost gothic overtone. Fans of: Hot Snakes, Rocket From The Crypt, Ink and Dagger Russian Circles: Three-piece instrumental band Russian Circles music spans from delicate guitar loops to heavy basslines, straightforward riffs to intricate passages and gradual transitions to inyour-face change. Fans of: Isis, Red Sparowes, Tool Thee Oh Sees: Indie garage rock jams with psychedelic punk leanings, this SF act brings classic psych garage to the NOW decade. Fans of: The Sonics, Rocky Erickson, The Ravonettes Ty Segall: California’s Ty Segall is an obvious fan of classic bands like Sonics and Standells, for sure, but with his raw, gritty garage punk sound of today, he’s landed in the Goner Records world of truly great young touring bands. Fans of: Black Lips, The Stooges, Jay Reatard, Nirvana D Generation: Garage and glam rock mixed with punk, 90s NYC act D Generation helped spearhead the revival that some say spawned The Strokes.

This is one of a handful of reunion shows. Fans of: NY Dolls, Hanoi Rocks, GnR, Sex Pistols

Bane: Originally a Converge side project, this youth crew Boston hardcore band brings the late 8Os sXe sound to the modern day with more melodic riffs and melody. Fans of: Chain of Strength, Comeback Kid, Uniform Choice, Batman From Ashes Rise: Portland’s From Ashe’s Rise to a great blend of stop start fast hardcore, mixing both melodic crusty core sounds with late 80s sXe HC and metal/trash. Fans of: His Hero is Gone, Cro-mags, Verbal Abuse Doomriders: Salem Massachusetts’s Nate Newton (Converge) doesn’t seem to be busy enough with his other band, so he starts another killer one. This act based more in a mix of the trash and heavy rock/stoner metal world. Fans of: Motorhead, Kyuss, Anthrax, Municipal Waste Mindspiders: Denton’s Mindspiders released a record on Dirtnap, when singer Mark Ryan’s band Marked Men went on a long hiatus. This became Ryan’s outlet for new songs and fans of catchy garage punk-pop can thank him for it. Fans of: The Briefs, Marked Men, The Ramones Total Control: Australian synth-punk group, Total Control, features Mickey from critically acclaimed garage post punk group, Eddie Current Suppression Ring. Fans of: Suicide, Joy Division/ Warsaw, Locust Defeater: Progressive melody filled metalhardcore from Boston. These Bridge Nine artists push boundaries with a HC concept album and even an acoustic EP. Fans of: Shai Halud, Converge, Coheed and Cambria The Damned: One of the kings of the ‘77 punk movement, Damned are famous for not only their catchy goth punk, but also for being the first UK punk band to release a record (beating the Pistols).

Fans of: Sex Pistols, Rancid, The Clash, The Jam

Hot Snakes: Straight outta San Diego, from the ashes of Drive Like Jehu came Hot Snakes.

Garagey backbones under a progressive indie punk sound, this is one of only a few Hot Snakes reunion shows. Fans of: Fugazi, Drive Like Jeu, Les Savy Fav, tanning and teeth whitening

Dead Horse: Dead Horse is a thrash metal band from Houston, Texas, which was most active in the 1980s and 1990s. Over seven years of touring and recording, Dead Horse developed a style influenced by thrash and death metal. Fans of: Slayer, Megadeath, Fearless Iranians From Hell

Cave In: Starting as a side project to Converge, Cave In grew to be one of the most original HC bands in the late 90s/early 00s, bringing a more spacey alt metal sound to the forefront with Zeppelin and Floyd influences. Fans of: Failure, Botch, Recover

Trash Talk: San Francisco hardcore punk band that has collaborated with the likes of Steve Albini and Keith Morris. Honing their craft through relentless worldwide touring, Trash Talk rips through their live sets with a ferocity, urgency, and honesty that leaves audiences shaken. Fans of: OFF!, Cerebral Ballzy, Black Flag, Municipal Waste

Negative Approach: Detroit’s NA is one of the best early 80s HC bands with a sound that was violent power and energy, all with only one EP and a 10” under their belt. One of Touch’n’Go Record’s first bands, even now John Brannon’s voice still sounds like being hit by a truck. Fans of: Necros, Bad Brains, Agnostic Front Paint It Black: A decade ago Den Yemin (Lifetime, Kid Dynamite) switched from guitar to vocals to start a fast, powerful late 80s style hardcore band. He accomplished it in spades. Fans of: Gorilla Biscuits, Youth of Today, Minor Threat Fucking Slayer: As Biggie once said “if ya don’t know, now ya know”...you should already know Slayer. From the pits of hell, these 80s hardcore influence metalheads practically invented speed metal and are the band that still defines it today.

Reign. In. Blood. Fans of: Slayer Youth Brigade: Youth Brigade is a SoCal punk trio formed in 1980, who founded Better Youth Organization, and is credited with having influenced numerous modern punk bands. After putting in decades churning out punk classics, they have solidified their place as legends in the genre.

Fans of: Swingin Utters, Rancid, X-ray Specs

The World Inferno Friendship Society: The World Inferno Friendship Society merges punk, soul, klezmer, jazz and unique instrumentation. Fans of: Gogol Bordello, The Damned, Dresden Dolls Death Grips: Relentlessly cathartic, blistering hiphop from Zach Hill, MC Ride, and Flatlander. To call the delivery of MC Ride’s lyrics intense would be an understatement. Add the swirling sonic assault of Flatlander’s dense production and the spaztic drumming of Zach Hill, and you’ve got a must see musical force to be reckoned with. Fans of: Public Enemy, Hella, Odd Future Touche Amore: Touche Amore’s aggressive presence, although amazingly captured on record, is dwarfed by their live performances. Scrapping the annoying melodic breakdowns and generic elements of newer hardcore bands, Touche Amore rely completely on their passion and songwriting to make a name for themselves. Fans of: Converge, Gaza, Dillinger Escape Plan Shapes Have Fangs: Austin’s Shapes Have Fangs are a garage rock quartet. Their debut LP, Dinner in the Dark, stayed true to it’s Texas roots with a grunge rock sound and West Texas vibe.

Fans of: The Black Angels, Harlem, No Bunny

Thieves: Melodic and anthemic pop punk locals Thieves being their energy an recklessness to this year’s black stage. Fans of: Saves The Day, Rufio, The Bled Black Lips: If you’re like us and like bands that have been banned from numerous venues for their wild live shows, nudity, band members kissing, fireworks and maybe even being spat at then you’ll love the Atlanta-based punk, garage, everything in-between band, The Black Lips. Bring your mom to this, she’ll absolutely love it. Fans of: Ty Segall, Wavves, Vivian Girls, peeing on yourself Boris: Japanese experimental metal artists, Boris take every effort to combine a multitude of genres, resulting in a sludgy, noisy, psychedelic, minimalistic, ambient adventure in sound. Fans of: Melvins, Earth, Neurosis, 3-sleeved shirts Cannibal Corpse: One of America’s most prolific death metal outfits. With artwork and lyrics drawing heavily from horror, the band has drawn quite a bit of controversy, gotten little to no television or radio coverage, yet has still become one of the best selling death metal bands stateside, and has garnered a massive cult following. Fans of: Slayer, Anthrax, Bathory, Gwar, Cannibis Corpse, cannibals, cannibis, corpses Kid Dynamite: Philadelphia based hardcore band, Kid Dynamite, rose from the ashes of Lifetime. One of only a few of shows since their breakup, they regale audiences with signature melodic hardcore anthems. Raucous, sweaty punk rock that’s sure please. Fans of: Dillinger Four, Avail, Lifetime Eyehategod: New Orleans sludge metal legends Eyehategod have arguably released some of the best metal records of our time. Thunderous percussion, walls of distortion, ripping feedback, accompanied by the always unpredictable stage

presence and unique vocal delivery of Mike Williams. This band does not fuck around. Fans of: Floor, Black Sabbath, The Melvins, Mastodon Zero Boys: Indianapolis based hardcore punk quartet debuted in the late 70s/early 80s. Their music tackles themes such as social stratification, teen angst, and political corruption. Fans of: Dead Kennedys, Minor Threat, Adolescents, D4 No Bunny: Nobunny is a Tucson-founded, Oaklandbased, bunny-faced act specializing in 60s-style garage rock and pop. NOBUNNY LOVES YOU! Fans of: Unreal Realness, Ramones, Chuck Berry Ceremony: SF based Ceremony (formerly on Bridge 9, not on Matador), play straight forward, fast as hell early style punk HC (think Boston HC scene, ‘80-’83). Fans of: SSD, Negative Approach, Negative FX, Black Flag Davilla 666: Hailing from Puerto Rico, these “gleefully filthy purveyors of indecipherably catchy garage-pop” will make you shout and dance - even if you don’t understand the words. Plus they play a mean Spanish cover of Jack Lee’s Hanging on the Telephone. Fans of: Black Lips, Jay Reatard, Turbo Fruits OBN III’s: five-piece from Austin, Texas fronted by Orville Bateman Neeley III from Bad Sports & The Pumpers. Straightforward, unforgiving stoogesstyle rock ‘n’ roll. Fans of: The Reatards Schmillion: Cover of the Chronicle and maybe an Austin award for best “this” and best “that”, this youthful all-female pop punk band has achieved a lot before graduating high school. Perfect way to start the day at the Black stage. Fans of: Bikini Kill, Green Day, The Muffs

BLUE STAGE Public Enemy: New York hip hop legends, Public Enemy, formed in 1982, brought a radical and controversial edge to the game that has resulted in them becoming one of the most memorable names in the genre. Fueled by strong personalities, an eye for social injustice, and quick wits, Public Enemy will be setting off day one in style. Fans of: Public Fucking Enemy.

Four Tet: Four Tet typically utilizes samples lifted from various sources including hip-hop, electronica, techno, jazz and folk. Hebden’s music is notable for its organic sounds and harmonious melodies and for eschewing the traditional popsong format in favour of a more abstract approach.

Fans of: Prefuse 73, Animal Collective, Pole Spank Rock: Reflecting the party rap atmosphere of Baltimore’s club scene, Spank Rock arrived as one of the best things to happen to both underground hip-hop and dirty rap, a pair of styles that rarely intermingle. Fans of: Major Lazer, Shabazz Palaces, Kid Sister Big Freedia: Big Freedia, at the forefront of the bounce music scene, straight up SOUNDS like New Orleans. High energy performances, flanked by his unforgettable dancers, solidify Big Freedia as a must see live act. Fans of: Katey Red, DJ Jubilee, Sissy Nobby, 5th Ward Weebie, ASS EVERYWHERE Franki Chan: Founder of the iheartcomix label and chief party starter for Check Yo Ponytail, Franki returns to Austin after throwing the best party Highland Mall has ever seen this past SXSW. Fans of: Diplo, A Trak

Pictureplane: Visualize an alien downing an LSD/ MDMA combo inside of a pyramid producing house music and you have Pictureplane.

Mastermind Travis Egedy commands distorted synthesizers, broken samples and dance beats, producing what feels like a rave in space. Fans of: Major Lazer, HEALTH YACHT: Portland based duo YACHT has been making experimental pop since 2002. Jona Bechtolt and Claire Evans create a mischievous and artful sound that does not lack digital and sci-fi influence. Fans of: Avey Tare, Talking Heads, Architecture in Helsinki, Powerpoint Omar Souleyman: Omar Souleyman is a Syrian singer who performs dance music with a traditional Syrian vibe. Often singing in Kurdish and Arabic, Omar has released three albums and has released multiple remixes for Bjork. Fans of: Middle Eastern techno, Bjork, and awesome mustaches Black Milk: Detroit rapper Curtis Cross started out producing, which led to him being one of the best underground hip hop artist currently putting out music. Fans of: Kool Keith, Madlib, A Tribe Called Quest Autobody: Funky electro dance from Austin. Live band dance party with a large local following for a reason. Fans of: !!!, The Rapture, Fischerspooner DJ Car Stereo Wars: Chris Rose started DJing some years ago in the local dance scene at Beauty Bar and grew in popularity with his style and dance parties. He’s returning to FFF to play his last Car Stereo Wars show ever. Fans of: Diplo, Flosstradamus, Cut Chemist, Burt Reynolds Fat Tony: Houston’s Fat Tony is one of the best up and coming rappers in the state. We’ll all be hearing a LOT more from Tony soon. Fans of: Outkast, Das Racist, Murs, UGK

DJ iPod Ammo: Houston rapper Fat Tony is the man behind the ones and twos. Check out his early set Friday. Fans of: Fat Tony, iPods, ammo Major Lazer: The digital reggae/dancehall/ love-child of Diplo and Switch. Collaborators have included: Vybz Cartel, Busy Signal, Mr. Vegas, Santigold, Nina Sky and Amanda Blank. So lace up your skanking shoes and always remember: guns don’t kill people....lazers do. Fans of: Diplo, Bonde do Rolê, Buraka Som Sistema, M.I.A. Neon Indian: Originating from Denton, TX, the indie electro of Neon Indian has earned praise from the likes of Pitchfork and Rolling Stone.

Neon Indian has amassed a fierce cult following through extensive touring and consistently inspired releases. Fans of: MGMT, Toro y Moi, Washed Out Childish Gambino: Donald Glover is a comic, writer, actor...oh and an incredible song writer and rapper. His internet releases have taken off with fans with his young hip hop style and sampling of indie acts like Girls, Grizzly Bear, and Sleigh Bells.

Fans of: Odd Future, Pharcyde, Kanye West Rakim: Still considered one of the single greatest rappers of 80s and early 90s, Rakim’s debut collaboration with Erik B still stands out as a classic for a reason and influences hundreds of artists still. Fans of: KRS-1, Mos Def, Nas Cold Cave: Plenty of ex HC and punk in this synth pop band, which gives an edgy lean to their gothy electro-indie sound. Ass shaking music that leans to the more upbeat side of the genre. Fans of: Interpol, Joy Division, New Order Dan Deacon: An electronic music composer from Baltimore whose sound is pure audio happiness. Abundant positive vibes, a live show incorporating full audience participation, and a pretty sweet beard. Fans of: Talking Heads, Devo, Animal Collective

Wugazi: Equal parts love of Wu-Tang Clan and Fugazi, Minneapolis producer/DJ Andy Swiss and Doomtree MC Cecil Otter perfectly mashed them up on their release of “13 Chambers.” This is their first time performing the Wugazi record live. Fans of: Wu Tang, Fugazi, Dangermouse Cecil Otter: Cecil is a key part of the Minneapolis hip hop group Doomtree. The collective has been putting out releases and touring for years, spawning the careers of many MI hip hop acts.

Fans of: POS, Dessa, Atmosphere, otters Brandt Brauer Fricke: This German live electronic band features a mix of older and new electronic sounds with orchestrated classical and modern writing. Imagine a synth show in a theater or concert hall. Fans of: Brian Eno, Kraftwerk, Danny Elfman T-bird and the Breaks: Austin’s own funk and soul jam, influence by the 60s and 70s soul/funk songs we all love. Full horn section and dance party to get you going. Fans of: James Brown, Stax/early Motown, Ray Charles Purity Ring: Started as a Gobble Gobble side project, Purity Ring’s smaller release has exploded this year. Their catchy female vocal fronted electro sound is sweet and smooth while being danceable at the same time. Fans of: Lykke Li, Neon Indian, Bjork B L A C K I E: B L A C K I E’s sound is part of a new wave of heavier hip hop based music, but stands out on his own. Brashy heavy, almost hardcore noise beats and his intense vocals and of scream meets hip hop is an amazing live show.

Fans of: Ice Cube “Amerikka’s...”, Black Flag “Damaged,” One Day As A Lion, terrible kerning

Odd Future: Odd Future is an alternative hip-hop collective from LA and experienced a quick rise to fame utilizing the internet as a means of DIY promotion. Often controversial, the group has achieved notable success, with member Tyler, the Creator winning the Best New Artist award at the 2011 VMA’s. Featuring many members, multiple subgroups, and a diverse catalog, Odd Future’s high energy, cathartic show is definitely one not to miss. Free Earl. Fans of: N.E.R.D., Clipse, Wu Tang, not Tegan and Sara Diplo: Mad Decent Records founder, Diplo, started in DJ crew Hollertronix, only to branch out producing/djing w/ MIA, not to mention his ever popular DJ team-up with Switch. Fans of: RJD2, DJ Shadow, MIA Flying Lotus LA’s “fly-lo” is taking DJing and producing to another level with influences ranging from Brian Eno to Radiohead to J Dilla. One of the hottest artists in the genre, don’t miss this set.

Fans of: Four Tet, Madlib, Caribou, Broadcast.

Del the Funky Homosapien: In the late 90s, two crews defined underground progressive hip hop.

Wu-Tang on the east coast and Hieroglyphics on the west. The leader of Hiero was Del the Funky Homosapien, still putting out some of the most cutting edge hip hop today, from his work with Gorillaz and Dan the Automator in Deltron 3030.

Fans of: Hiero, De La Soul, Pharcyde, Fugees BATHS: Producer WIll Wiesenfeld layers unorthodox sounds into electronic goodness.

Flowing yet brittle, experimental yet catchy, Baths creates distinct tunes that cannot be squeezed into any one genre. Fans of: Flying Lotus, Bjork, Bibio Austra: Toronto, Canada’s Austra blends somber, but danceable electronic beats and melody with beautifully haunting vocals, courtesy of classically trained singer, Katie Stelmanis. The fairly new

band’s release is on Domino Records. Fans of: Fever Ray, PJ Harvey, Zola Jesus MNDR: NY electronic music duo MNDR has opened for the likes of YACHT, Massive Attack, and Deerhoof since their forming in 2009. Winners of Best Web-Born Artist at the 2011 MTV O Music Awards. Fans of: Sleigh Bells, Austra, IDM Grimes: With a swooping, baby-voiced singing style, Grimes crafts a haunting brand of lo-fi dance music that fits stylistically within the gothelectronic umbrella coined “witch house” or “grave wave.” Fans of: Zola Jesus, Austra, G-Side: Hailing from Huntsville, AL, G-Side have found a balance between old school Southern hip hop and cutting edge sounds thanks to collaborators such as Diplo. Fans of: UGK, Outkast Bird Peterson: Bird Peterson is an indie electro producer from Austin, who made a name for himself with bootleg remixes of well-known songs that were regularly featured on blogs such as Discobelle, Gorilla vs. Bear and IHeartComix. Fans of: Franki Chan, Ed Banger, A-trak SPEAK: Named “Best New Band 2010” by the Austin Chronicle. Their debut LP, I Believe in Everything, is a playful synth pop adventure marked by technical aptitude. While their songs are sweet, carefree and youthful it’s clear from their execution that their craftsmanship is meant to be taken seriously. Fans of: Prince, Passion Pit, and MGMT Soul Khan: Having started rapping in junior high school, and refining his craft through underground rap battles, Soul Khan’s skill as an MC is unquestionable. His distinct voice and delivery leave you hanging on every lyric. His debut received accolades from sites such 2Dopeboyz, Global Grind, Okayplayer. Fans of: Pharcyde, Del the Funky Homosapien, Talib Kweli

YELLOW STAGE

Reggie Watts: Before his video for “What about Blow Jobs?” went viral, Watts studied jazz, wrote compositions for choreographers and fronted hip hop blues rock group Maktub. While his musical prowess gained him recognition from the likes of Brian Eno, his comedic lyrics and spoken word gained him recognition from the rest of the world. .

Fans of: Afros, comedy, fuck shit stacks.

Fans of: stand up that doesn’t reference “Coldplay” in the joke as a positive.

Anarchy Championship Wrestling: Local annual wresting group that brings chaos to the ring. Performing daily at FFF...you can’t miss this.

Fans of: WWE, WWF, Rowdy Roddy Piper Adira Amiran: Weird, funny and upbeat, this electro comedy dance jams brings up memories of 80s jazzercise and glittery skin tight clothes that were never meant to be funny. Fans of: Leslie and the Lys, Tim and Eric

Brett Gelman: Known for his appearances on HBO’s Funny Or Die Presents and The Life & Times of Tim, Brett can currently be seen on Adult Swim’s Eagleheart. Fans of: Adult Swim

Jake Flores: Hailing from Austin, TX, comedian Jake Flores carries a small satchel of gold coins on his person at all times and he loves to share. Fans of: The Velveeta Room, Emily Persinger

Matt Bearden: Recently named “Best Funny, Funny Man” in the Chronicle’s Best-of-Austin Critics’ Poll, Matt has also appeared on Comedy Central’s Premium Blend and Austin Stories. Fans of: Roasts, Dudley & Bob, beard and moustache contests, Misprint Magazine

Best Fwends: Best Fwends was born in Forth Worth, Texas, all thanks to a Toys ‘R Us keyboard, guitar effects processor, and the lovably annoying voices of two musical idiot savants - Anthony Davis and Dustin Pilkington. Fans of: The Death Set, early Beastie Boys, Gay Against You

Upright Citizens Brigade: Launched the careers of so many comics and sketch performers including Amy Pohler (Parks and Rec), Matt Messer (30 Rock), Horatio Sans (SNL), and Rob Riggle (Daily Show). Fans of: Saturday Night Live, Broken Lizard, The State

Maggie Maye: Local up-and-coming female comic that has performed at Velveeta, Cap City and finalist in the Funniest Person in Austin. Fans of: Maggie Mae’s

FFF Dating Game: Just what is sound like, but FFF style. Audience members can fall in love and win a the date of their dreams...or nightmares.

Fans of: The original Dating Game, cheesy game shows, not the Black Stage, love, embarrassment Altercation Comedy Hour: Hosted by local comic JT Habersaat, the edgy indie music themed comedy show has toured the country on fests like Warped, as well as played FFF annually for 3 years.

Wham City sketch comedy: A Baltimore art collective featuring electro musician Dan Deacon.

The group is on its first full tour and if you want to check out hilarious, indie sketch comedy, you won’t be disappointed. Fans of: New Movement Sketch Comedy, UCB, The State, Dan Deacon Neal Brennan: Former writing partner with Dave Chappelle and co-creator of both Half Baked and The Chappelle show. Neal recently started doing stand up...and he ain’t half bad, as you can imagine. Fans of: Chappelle Show, Half Baked

Johnny Pemberton: From Rochester Minnesota, Johnny is known for hosting and writing the MTV series, MegaDrive. He has also made appearances on Jimmy Kimmel Live! and It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Fans of: Heavy Machinery, Cats, Snacks

Ali Wong: Stand up comedian Ali Wong has been listed at the top of lists for up and coming comics. Her racially and gender charged humor has recently gotten her roles in an upcoming NBC series and Oliver Stone’s Savages. Fans of: Margret Cho, dead pan humor

Turquoise Jeep: Turquoise Jeep, the group behind such YouTube hits as “Lemme Smang It”, “Fried Or Fertilized” and many more, has taken the internet by storm with their humor infused hip hop and R&B hits. Fans of: Smashing and banging it

Cameron Buchholtz: Cameron Buchholtz is a stand up comedian based in Austin, TX. He is the host of the comedy podcast ‘CB Radio’, where every week he sits down with some of the biggest names in comedy and pop culture to discuss whatever comes up. He is proudly from Oklahoma.

Fans of: Comedy, Standing up, Oklahoma

Donald Glover: Starting out as a young comic with sketch group “Derek Comedy,” Glover soon found himself, as the youngest writer on hit show 30 Rock, his fresh style of comedy. But not long after, he landed one of the lead roles in NBC’s hit show “Community.” Fans of: Aziz Ansari, 30 Rock, Community Air Sex Contest: The time to lose your air virginity is NOW. Kind of like air guitar except.. sex. The sky’s the limit on props, music, storyline and dignity. Fans of: sex, air dildos, air dongs, air spooning, air fisting, air hand holding, air Plan B, air abstinence, air fleshlights, air sexting.

Captured! By Robots: Part-concert and part-performance act musical comedy troupe Captured! by Robots consists of three robots, two stuffed apes, three headless hornsmen, and one human. Fans of: Blue Meanies, Terminator 2, The Iron Giant, Short Circuit I, Short Circuit II Louis Katz: Born and bred in L.A., Katz’s half hour spot on “Comedy Central Presents” aired earlier this year. He also recently released his debut comedy album, “If These Balls Could Talk,” on Comedy Central Records. Fans of: Raunchy, Absurd, Hilarious

Michael Priest: Dark one liners delivered darkly.

Fans of: Kind of messed up humor that’s actually messed up.

Brian Posehn: From Mr. Show to various TV roles, Brian Posehn spent a lot of time in the background until his recent surge and borderline cult following amongst fans of heavy metal and harder music. Brian doesn’t hesitate to out himself as a giant nerd with an unhealthy passion for all things Star Trek, weed, metal and video games.

Fans of: Henry Rollins, David Cross, Patton Oswalt, Aziz Ansari Henry Rollins: Henry Rollins’ spoken word performances range from stand up comedy to commentaries on his childhood, politics, society, and life in general - sharing his wisdom and experience with the world we live in and his angle on the human condition. Rollins’ spoken word style varies greatly, ranging from intense commentaries on society to playful, sometimes vulgar, anecdotes. Fans of: Black Flag, huge necks, being smart

Master Pancake’s Video Jukebox: Master Pancake’s witty repertoire meets music videos mocking vids all the way from the 80s to today!

Fans of: Elk Mating Rituals, quick-cuts, explosions

regular performances at FFF, the group puts on free or cheap comedy shows Wednesday-Sunday as well as improv classes. Fans of: Upright Citizens Brigade

Veggie Hotdog Eating Contest: This annual veggie hotdog eating contest is always both hilarious and fun...and filling. Fans of: hot dogs, competitions, hot dogging, Takeru Kobayashi

Chris Trew: Chris is a big part of New Movement sketch and theater, as well as puts on the local Hell Yeah Comedy Fest in Austin. Chris is hilarious and also helped curate the Yellow Stage. Fans of: half beards, McDonalds corporate videos, weiners

Brody Stevens: Referred to by his friend Zach Galifianakis as Zach’s favorite comic, Brody does a loud, but deadpan comedy of awkwardness that never let’s you down. Good times. Fans of: Zach Galifianakis, Andy Kaufman Kenny “K-Strauss” Strasser (Yo Yo Extravaganza): What Kenny does is too hard to explain, but can’t be missed. His pranks of yo yo comedy have been pulled on news networks all of the country where demonstrates his “expertise” in disastrous fashion live on air time and again. You’d think they would have figured out that he was a comic and not a yo yo master, after seeing him as a character on The Office, huh? Fans of: The Office, Andy Kaufman, Yo-Yo Ma Doug Mellard: Doug Mellard has made appearances on Last Comic Standing and all over Comedy Central. This Austin funny man, “The funniest in Austin” to be exact, takes jabs at himself to keep us all laughing. Fans of: self deprecating humor, being tiny, Michael J Fox Page and Stephen’s FFF Wedding: An honestto-god wedding on the hallowed grounds of Fun Fun Fun Fest between two people who love each other and live music, in that order. Fans of: Page, Stephen, love New Movement Sketch Comedy: The New Movement has been leading the pack of Austin Comedy troupes for years. In addition to their

Nick Flanagan: Nick is from Toronto and singer for hardcore band Brutal Knights. Nick hosts online comedy, does videos, is a columnist and an actor.

His surreal, almost mocking comedy is strange and hilarious. He’s bring friendly Canada to meet our southern hospitality. Fans of: Neil Hamburger, Tim and Eric Rap Battle Royale: Hosted by performance artcore rapper Terp2it a.k.a. Chris Trew, the deets for this M.C. battle-to-the-death are as follows: Anyone can compete, fulfill their destiny to become the King or Queen of Battle Rap Royal, and/or take home the Ultimate Pride Pack. Fans of: MC Chris, not of 8 Mile.

What the Hell: Magic Stunt Show: Featuring last year’s FFF stunt show performer, Jacob Calle, who put a live scorpion in his mouth and stapled it shut. He and his brother Chris, along with circus freak and local legend, Lizard Man, are doing a magic version of the stunt show. Who knows what you’ll witness. Fans of: MAGIC, Jackass, Jim Rose.

Cody Hustak: Cody Hustak is freshly relocated to Austin and has already held his own in the past two “Funniest Person in Austin” Contest.

His signature one liners and short anecdotes are reminiscent of a more sober Mitch Hedberg. Fans of: Mitch Hedberg, funny stories

vendor list Food Vendors:

Retail Vendors:

FFF6 Poster Show

Austin’s Pizza Aquarelle Black Sheep Lodge Blue Ribbon BBQ Boomerang’s Pies Carnevore Chi’Lantro Crepe Crazy Frank Handshakes Hey Cupcake!

Juiceland Kebabalicious Linda Chan’s Lucky J’s Mmmpanadas The Parlor Progress Coffee Snowies Thai BBQ Tiff’s Treats

420 Spot Austin Facial Hair Club Chaos Card Company Chrome Goorin Bros. Hats Hold Up Love Nail Tree Bruise Cruise Festival Peoples Rx Prototype Vintage RUNNUR Strut The Don Collection

Presented by The American Poster Institute Kollective Fusion Decoder Ring Empire Press Secret Serpents Industry Mexican Chocolate Jay Ryan Paul Imagine Penhead Ryan Duggan Lil Tuffy Boss Construction Awesome Dudes Obsolete Clintprints Under Pressure

Non-profits: Action For Animals Attendance Records AustinMusicPeople Invisible Children LifeBeat SIMS Foundation & HAAM Texas School for the Deaf Language for All The Revival Fund Austin2Angkor: Building Futures in Cambodia Project LOOP

friday Noon

1 pm

ORANGE TV Torso Canon Blue

2 pm

3 pm

Jim Ward (sparta/atdi)

5 pm

6 pm

BLUE

Defeater

DJ iPod Ammo

Total Control Mindspiders

Fat Tony Car Stereo Wars

Heartless Bastards The Thermals Black Joe Lewis

Autobody

From Ashes Rise

Black Milk

Bane

Omar Souleyman

D Generation

YACHT

Ty Segall

Picture Plane

Thee Oh Sees

YELLOW Maggie May Best Fwends Jake Flores Adira Amiran

Doomriders Cloud Nothings Ocote Soul Sound 4 pm

BLACK

Franki Chan

Anarchy Championship Wrestling

Altercation comedy hour FFF Dating Game

Upright Citizens Brigade

Big Freedia 7 pm

Okkervil River

8 pm

Clap Your Hands Say Yeah

9 pm

10 pm

Passion Pit

Russian Circles Murder City Devils

Danzig Legacy

Spank Rock

Matt Bearden Brett Gelman Reggie Watts

Four Tet

Public Enemy

saturday Noon

ORANGE

BLACK

BLUE

YELLOW

tba dj

Michael Priest Cameron Buchholtz

Manejo Beto

Thieves

Keep Shelly In Athens Future Islands

2 pm

Shapes Have Fangs Total Touche Amore

Joe Lally (fugazi)

Deathgrips

T-bird and the Breaks

3 pm

Tinarewin

World Inferno Friendship Society

Brandt Brauer Fricke

The Joy Formidable

Trash Talk

Cecil Otter

Dead Horse

Wugazi

Youth Brigade

Dan Deacon

Paint It Black

Cold Cave

1 pm

4 pm

Tune-Yards 5 pm

6 pm

7 pm

8 pm

9 pm

10 pm

Ra Ra Riot M83

Blackie Purity Ring

Captured

By Robots Anarchy Championship Wrestling air sex contest Donald Glover

Negative Approach

Rakim

Cave In

Childish Gambino

Hot Snakes

Neon Indian

The Damned

Major Lazer

Girls

Lykke Li

Spoon

Ali Wong Louis Katz

Turquoise Jeep Johnny Pemberton

Neal Brennan

Wham City sketch comedy

sunday Noon

ORANGE

BLACK

BLUE

Schmillion

Soul Khan

OBN III

Speak

Davilla 666

Bird Peterson

Ceremony

G-Side

New Movement Sketch Comedy

No Bunny

Grimes

Anarchy Championship Wrestling

Zero Boys

MNDR

Page & Stephen’s FFF Wedding

Crooks 1 pm

Lemuria Le Butcherettes

2 pm

3 pm

4 pm

Asobi Seksu We Were Promised Jetpacks Mates of State

6 pm

7 pm

8 pm

9 pm

10 pm

Eyehategod Ted Leo and the Pharmacists Architecture in Helsinki Hum

Austra

Rap Battle Royale Nick Flanagan Chris Trew

K-Strauss (Yo-Yo Extravaganza)

Brody Stevens

Kid Dynamite Cannibal Corpse

BATHS Del the Funky Homosapien

Boris

Flying Lotus

Black Lips

Diplo

Blonde Redhead

Odd Future

Brian Posehn

Slayer

Cody Hustak

What the Hell: Magic Stunt Show

Doug Mellard

Budos Band 5 pm

YELLOW

Veggie Hotdog Eating Contest Master Pancake’s Video Jukebox

Henry Rollins

DOWNTOW

L ady Bi

dy La

dL Bir

rd L

ake

il Tra

il Tra ake

BLACK

STAGE

PIP

PIP

West River Side Dr.

THE KEYMASTER Black Stage

Like a Baus

Euro Bungee

Emergency Services

Yellow Stage

Baus Bar

Buck Off

Bike Racks

Blue Stage

Homie Zone

Skate or Die

Happy Trees

Orange Stage

Fooooooood

Wrastling

Booooooooze

Los Ba単os

Merch

st S South Fir

WN AUSTIN

t.

Lady Bird Lake Trail

BLUE

STAGE

ORANGE

STAGE

PIP

P

YELLOW West River side D r.

TIX

PALMER AUDITORIUM LONG CENTER

STAGE

How to Book Fun Fun Fun Fest To the casual observer, booking a world-class music festival like Fun Fun Fun Fest must seem like a daunting task. You might think that to create a mix of bands that complements Austin’s unique energy and diverse taste takes a special breed of booker. The kind of man whose singleminded devotion to live music leads him to leave creepy, heavy-breathing messages on Danzig’s answering machine every hour until he agrees to play “Skulls”. Turns out, nothing could be further from the truth. Undercover Misprint investigators have discovered that FFF planners simply use a 100% reliable formula for creating a bitchin’ festival. It’s so easy you can even play along at home. All it takes is this trusty checklist, some idiots to lay out your program and Glenn Danzig’s home telephone number.

Piping Hot Bands

Local Folks

4 The band that played the 11 am slot on the Google+ stage at acl 4 Band from latest iPod commercial 4 Top of the page from Brooklyn Freegan Asshole Touch Me blog 4 Hip hop artist who tweets a lot

4 My friend is on morning radio!

4 Band who still owes the Mohawk money 4 Anemic vegans throwing up after eating too many hot dogs

Nostalgia

4 Buzz band from 2006 4 The tape that’s currently playing in my Toyota Corolla 4 Band whose patch was on my jacket when I used to be “punk” Things so Girls Come

4 A girl from Europe who wears high tops 4 Hugely popular electronic artist that normal dudes have never heard of 4 Wimpy pretty boys off the cover of Nylon Guys 4 Non-threatening couples act 4 Music that’s fun to dance to in a giant field

Black Stage Breakdown

4 Crusty 4 Extra crusty 4 Art metal 4 A band whose name was on a shirt I pulled randomly from my black t-shirt drawer 4 Straightedge band (to save on drink tix) 4 Band guys from Japan ✖ Municipal Waste 4 Danzig, duh Dumb Shit that Moody Wants

4 Eurobungie 4 Yo yos 4 Pro-wrestling 4 Mechanical bull 4 “Guilty Feet”

From the desk

of S layer

Dear Transmission Entertainment Bros, Got texted from one of your interns that we’re moving up to the Orange Stage.

(Orange is a pretty lame colour though -- Can we change it to a darker orange?

Burnt orange? Think about that one.) Anyway, we noticed you dudes left off some stuff from our rider and wanted to make sure this shit gets taken care of otherwise WE ARE IMPALING YOUR CATS ON SPIKES OR SOME SHIT. Just kidding.

We’re in this for the beer and titties, just like you guys. XOXO!

Totes brand blood-proof umbrellas

4 box seats to the Austin Ice Bats

Sandwich platter in pentagram form (include hummus and sprouts)

Pad of newsprint, watercolours and those markers that smell like different cool stuff

50,000 live bees for Dave 100 snow-white goats for slaughter Halal butcher to slaughter the goats

Whetstone for battle axes Ping pong table, 4 paddles, balls 1 Bowflex

Freezer bags and coolers to preserve the goat meat until I can get home and make slow-roasted goat tacos with cilantro and onion

Hogan’s Heroes DVD Box Set

4 yoga ball chairs, black

Nerf brand bow and arrows

Schlitterbahn with 4 lockers and 4 souvenir cups

Reliquary containing finger bones of St. George

4 Light-Brites

New sweet blackletter font book (Taschen?) with the pink cover

10 Cases of Gogurt 2 shoeboxes to hide our Grammy awards (do not write “Grammys” on the boxes)

Hand sanitizer Hand satanizer

Zamboni with full tank 4 tubes of StainStick 1 human skull full of Red Hots

The Sea: A Literary Primer For mariners of yore, being at sea was a rite of passage, when boys became men, and men became seamen. As FFF comes of age, it too must leave the familiar sylvan splendor of Waterloo Park for the boundless waters of the shores of Auditorium. Naturally, your first stint can be confusing and emotional. If you’re from Austin, you’re probably thinking: “what’s this blue shit and why does it make me wet?” Fortunately, the greats of the Western canon wasted thousands of words expounding on the vast and terrifying beauty of the sea. These thoughts are probably of little consolation as you’re baked out of your skull standing in the port-o-potty line. Since you’re probably illiterate anyway, Misprint has broken down the profound lessons of classic nautical literature to help you maximize your festival experience.

Rime of the Ancient Mariner A bunch of boring stuff happens in this poem, but all you need to know is the part where the dude wears an albatross around his neck. Turns out, that totally blows and serves as the perfect metaphor for regret.

So during the festival, when regrets like “why did I let myself hear that weak-ass yacht set when Bane was playing at the Black Stage?” or “why didn’t I bury a bottle of Jameson here last week so I don’t have to drink Heineken?” or “why didn’t I just stay home and watch Crank 2?” start to weigh heavily on your mind, quit complaining and just be glad a giant, smelly, pissed-off sea-bird isn’t chained to your throat.

20,000 Leagues Under the Sea As both longtime readers of Misprint know, our position on steampunk has been pretty clear. Since the Trail of Dudes were too busy working on their steampunk fursuits to play the festival this year, there’s really nothing relevant to take away from this classic of Victorian pseudoscience other than the fact that giant squid are awesome and will totally fuck your shit up.

The Old Man and the Sea Ernest “Elephant Gun Polisher” Hemingway’s late period novella pretty much sums up the future life of grownup dudes in Austin. Namely being really old, being basically irrelevant and not getting any action for up to 84 days at a time, leading your friends to believe you’re actually afflicted by some kind of mermaid curse. The only lesson to take to heart is that at least while you’re floating in a sea of your own indifference, you can jam your old Hum records.

Moby Dick Although it’s hard to truly match the fraternal affection that comes from three years at sea killing giant mammals with spears and jauntily wearing whale cocks as adorable tunics, three days at the Black Stage packed with wall to wall dudes comes pretty close. Bonus points if you can find the one dude wearing a white t-shirt and punch him in the face. h

Misprint Drawing Contest!

You’re stuck at Auditorium Shores all weekend. You’re surrounded by water and idiots. You’re praying for a boat as badly as we are. What does yours look like?

my boat name

Send your boat to hollaback@ misprintmagazine.com for koozie-shaped glory.

The Game of Fun

FFF isn’t always to going to be fun. There’s going to be down time when your boyfriend drags you to some dumb anarchist metal stoner show or your girlfriend drags you to some dumb French disco aerobics show.

The Game of Fun is here for you - all you need is a coin and tokens (just use some seashells from the grounds). Heads move one space, tails move two spaces. First one to the port-o-potty wins! Good luck.

bands that are not on the black stage (1) Spoon: I’m actually pretty excited that Britt Daniel is taking a break from hanging out at Portland vegan strip clubs, eating unnecessarily large donuts and getting rained on to come back to Austin to shop for black shirts at Service and slobber his way through a set for the exhometown crowd.

Spoon

(4) Lykke Li: Scandinavia is super hot right now. Anyone that knows Swedish and English is furiously translating any Z-grade mystery thriller they can get their mitten-covered hands on. ABBA and whale meat?

Never more popular than right now. Lykke Li (Stieg Larsson’s favourite songstress) is riding that wave on a sloop made of reindeer hides all the way to the Svaalbard seedvault in the sky.

Spoon

(3) CYHSY: After the buzziest breakout since Oprah gave away those bees, their festival font size shrank faster than my erection during a YACHT concert. Even so, odds are solid that these frumpy dads outrock their dumb name.

(2) Blonde Redhead: Blonde Redhead’s winning formula of a decade and a half’s worth of killer records performed live by an adorable Japanese former art student backed by twin Italian ex-models has always worked for us. Not to mention inspiring more than one high-concept porno.

Blonde

Spoon

more bands that are not on the black stage (1) Public Enemy: Some of the credibility of this legendary, politicallyminded act was undermined by Season 3 of Flavor of Love. But it can’t be worse than when Ice-T started playing a cop or Ice Cube made Are We There Yet? Besides, who are we to judge? Flav’s a 52-year-old man with 8 kids and wears a clock around his neck. He needs love too!

Pub Enemy

(4) Major Lazer: Apparently kids are already over the cartoon monkey frontman from Gorillaz? ML’s jams are solid and guaranteed to please, for sure, but it’s not like Diplo tapped into some new creative vision.

It’s more like he took a few days off from pressing play or updating his Wikipedia page from his laptop to let it run an algorithm that solved the equation for good dance music.

(3) Wugazi: Can’t wait to hear these dudes stream their tunes from their MySpace page...live! Meanwhile, Joe Lally will be sitting in the back being pissed.

(2) Neon Indian: If you like unconscious girls, you’ll love this band!

Last time they played the Mohawk at least nine teenage girls passed out from a combination of exhaustion, Beatlemania-style hysterical swooning and roofies. So for the FFF set, organizers are setting up a field hospital offering saline drips, Pedialyte and hugs.

Pub Enemy Neon

bands on the black stage Slayer

(1) Slayer: They love yogurt. They love wearing hockey jerseys. They were in the Cremaster Cycle. Nothing we could write in this space can change the fact that it’s fucking Slayer. If you’re reading this you probably carved this band’s name into your forearm in middle school and are definitely going to see Slayer.

(4) Murder City Devils: Here’s hoping MCD spent the few years since their last FFF appearance brushing up on the lyrics to their own songs. I mean, I’ve jammed Empty Bottles so many times while drinking myself blind that even I can play those songs, and I just got kicked out of my Spoon cover band for sucking. Someone get these bros a teleprompter.

Slayer

Danzig

(3) Danzig Legacy: As far as I can tell, Danzig’s legacy means glow in the dark t-shirts, endless litigation against Crystar, Crystal Warrior and more tattoo regrets than all the barbed wire in Texas. That doesn’t bother me in the least though, because I’ve been pissing off my parents with “Angel Fuck” since I was 13, and the chance to hear Danzig croon that shit is a dream come true.

(2) Hot Snakes: No one is more pumped than us that Speedo took a break from marinating himself in extra virgin olive oil and bottomless tanning to put the Hot Snakes back together. Expect the tannest man in rock to kill it on stage and then creep everyone out during the FFF Dating Game.

Slayer Winner!

wild cards

Hank

(1) Henry Rollins: We wanted him to win this, because he has the biggest neck in rock and roll (bigger than Danzig’s!) but then we figured he’s just going to talk about season 2 of Sons of Anarchy instead of his usual topics of power yoga and mani/pedis.

(Unseeded) Yo-Yo Guy, Sax Man, Guy Who Staples His Genitals to a Wall, et al: Yep, all these dudes are going to be here performing their “sets.” I promise, it will be funny the first time some dude takes his shirt off and plays “Guilty Feet” or punches himself in the balls with a Duncan Imperial. Can’t promise it will be funny for the remaining 30 minutes of their time slots.

(3) Matt Bearden: Hey Matt, if you’re reading this can you email us back and let us know if you can host next year’s Beard & Moustache contest? It’s on the 25th of February, sometime in the evening. Thanks! XO!

Hank MW

(2) The Spectre of Municipal Waste: Surely we’re not the only ones who noticed the gaping Municipal Waste-shaped hole in this year’s FFF. Boogie boarders everywhere are super bummed and have been drowning their sorrows in oceans of Icehouse since the news hit. It’s not going to be the same, but in honor of Richmond’s finest, I’ll just have to vomit on some crust punker during Trash Talk.

Which Stage is Right for Me? Misprint’s essential companion for the inebriated or mentally feeble.

I am • a male (20) • a female (19) • a mermaid (6) • a merman (5) • Ladybird Johnson (0) How do you feel about having blood poured on you?

• That’s a fucking weird question (0) • I once threw a blood wrestling party at my house (20) • I was an extra in the blood sprinkler scene from Blade II (15) • I just did my hair (-1) • I’m in GWAR (100) Why are you at FFF? • Eurobungie (2) • I washed ashore (5) • Getting married here (2) • It’s my job because I’m the keyboardist in Spoon (-1) • I volunteered because I’m an idiot (0) What are your thoughts on ass?

• I like it everywhere (10) • I keep trying to get Graham to book Mix-A-Lot (5) • I enjoy shooting industrial staples into mine (8) • Don’t need it when I stand up paddleboard (2) • More of a dick man (100)

Preferred Danzig Era • Misfits (10) • Samhain (5) • Danzig solo (15) • Shirtless in the library (20) • Buying cat food (25)

Favorite nautical affectation • Stupid captain’s hat (2) • Peg leg (10) • Gay sailor tank top (8) • Whale penis cassock (15) • An actual yacht (10) • Waterwings (4) Favorite nautical experience • Nothing but tanning • Schlitterbahn (5) oil (0) • Solo circumnavigation of Are you really going to add the globe (19) up all these points?

• SHOWERTIME! (3) • Sit down paddleboarding (4) • Yes, because I really want to know where I’ll be • Riverboat booze cruise (6) at FFF (0) Favorite nautical movie • Yes, because this band is • Poseidon Adventure (0) fucking boring (5) • The Abyss (0) • No, I can’t add (?)

• Hunt for Red October (0) • No, because I just ripped • Das Boot (0) the schedule out and threw • Waterworld (20) the rest on the ground (??)

Favorite scene from • No, because this is Waterworld Misprint, and I know you • The part when he pees guys didn’t bother to make into a potted lime tree (10) this add up correctly (51) h • The part when holy shit he has gills! (15) • The part when the Smokers jump their jetskis into the floating citadel (20) the tally • The part when Dennis 0-5 Points = Ladybird Lake Hopper smokes (25) 6-20 Points = Blue Stage 21-33 Points = Yellow Stage • The part when the 34-50 Points = Orange Stage Mariner launches the 51+ Points = Black Stage huge stunt kite (30) • The part when the old guy floats around in the dank oil hole (35)

we don’t love to hate. we hate what we love.

6th ANNUAL

beard &

moustache competition

FEBRUARY 25, 2012

THE MOHAWK

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Gossip! Gossip! Gossip!

A guitarist in a touring band from Ohio was nearly shocked to death plugging in his amp during a gig at Beerland. He was medevac’d via pedicab to the hospital in serious but stable condition, where he ultimately recovered. Conspiracy theorists have been quick to point out the implausibility of “shoddy wiring” or “mic cables covered in human tooth marks” at a world-class venue like Beerland, making pointed accusations around town that someone is trying to assassinate shitty rock musicians. Regardless of what you believe, owner Randall “I really look like a pretty normal dude for being the guy who owns Beerland” Stockton reports that due to excessive litigation coupled with the fact his bar is a “total shithole” the long-rumoured closing of Beerland is coming “any day now”.

--------------------------------------------------Fresh off the success of his blockbuster action movie Tree of Life, Terrence “It’s naptime when I say it is” Malick is back in Austin filming a new slasher movie, The Burial. Details of the plot are hazy, but insiders have confirmed an over-thehill rock musician (Christian “I ate bugs for Werner Herzog and I’m still the goddamn Batman” Bale) enacts bloody revenge on the sound-guy-turned-priest who ruined his career (Javier Bardem, as himself). Initial reports describe the film as “really, really boring.” Malick and Bale were spotted filming at Austin City Limits festival, including footage of Bale “drinking a Bud, then totally rocking out to Coldplay.”

A reliable source reports part-time fishmonger/Tolkien slashfic superfan Robert Plant was recently spotted in the waiting room of the downtown Planned Parenthood. Plant, who was once affiliated with promising local band Led Zeppelin, is in town to train for the over-60 couples competitive standup paddleboard circuit.

Misprint insiders have confirmed that he’s taken up residence somewhere in the weirdest part of South Austin and has been subsisting on a strict diet of enchildladas verdes made with the flesh of human infants.

--------------------------------------------------The Austin music scene is still reeling from the earthshattering news that perpetual Emo’s booker/half-vampire closet Pynchon superfan Guilty Dave has finally changed out of his trademark “Guilty” T-shirt after a pungent 3,954 days. Though Misprint (and thusly, the world) will never know the true nature of Guilty’s crime, we know it must have been senseless and horrific enough to earn the man a penance of twelve years working at Emo’s. Freshly exonerated, and decked in a new svelte black tee, there was no reason to keep Emo’s open anymore. In its place, a slightly less shitty Emo’s opened up in the old Backroom, proving once and for all that the days of $3 pitchers, shooting pool for money with ex-cons and constant Pantera at maximum volume that made the old Backroom so great are gone forever. h