Impresaria
At Red Arrows Club during set up of cabaret
Smoking area at Red Arrows Club
Amajor positive is I never wanted children, and I now can’t have children so people don’t pressure me into having children, or ask when I’m going to have them, which is great.Another positive is I haven’t had to lie about my age on OkCupid, because blokes presume that if you’re in your 40’s you are there in a last ditch attempt to get pregnant, so they don’t want to go on a date with you.
Psychologically, there’s a kind of teenage energy that I’ve felt which is both good and bad. I had troublesome mood swings with periods; I have suppressed periods through most of life with the pill and coils. I think with the menopause those hormones that I’ve suppressed for years are back. There is a kind of vibrancy to being very emotional, very present. I feel more linked to my physical self which feeds into a kind of creativity. I still have a coil in, which is giving me some oestrogen. I was advised by a mate to keep it in, she said it helps with the menopause. I haven’t had very bad hot flushes; I’ve weirdly quite enjoyed them!
Afriend said to me that after the menopause you become this better version of yourself that isn’t governed by hormones, that you’re kind of just straightforwardly you. I’m feeling that coming in as well, in between feeling more hormonal than ever before, I feel a new kind of calmness and Confidence.
Afew years ago, somebody said to me that I was dyspraxic, and I looked it up and thought “yeah, I defo am dyspraxic”, I didn’t think much more of it. I feel that the menopause has affected my dyspraxia, made it worse (a friend who hasADHD said she definitely recognises more symptoms inline with the onset of the menopause). I’ve looked for connections between neuro-diversity and the menopause and have found nothing online. They say that 80% of people who have dyspraxia are male - so this might be why - but I feel that my has condition become pretty severe, and present, during this time when I’m definitely coming into menopause.
I don’t know if it’s hormonal or psychological, but there’s been a kind of reinventing one’s self that I’ve enjoyed. I’ve also got a new boyfriend just as I was coming into menopause, so I’ve kind of been enjoying feeling sexy. Enjoying a kind of mature sensuality is part of this transition for me.
Lara Lives
in Ramsgate