KI TAVO
My Greatest Role Model Rabbi Andrew Shaw Chief Executive, Mizrachi UK
Two major things happened this week to me. My eldest son began his time in Yeshiva in Israel and it was the third Yahrzeit for my beloved mother Sonia. There is a powerful story about my mother that happened during my time in Yeshiva, which I recalled this week as the two events coincided. It was one night in our dorm room and one of our room mates was upset. I think, if I recall, it was an issue with a girl he was dating seriously, (they eventually got married!) They had had an argument or something and I tried to offer my sympathies. He turned to me and said, ‘Andrew, thank you, but don’t worry, this really isn’t a problem – you have much bigger problems to worry about.’ I was perplexed. What were my ‘bigger problems?’. I asked him for an explanation. He looked at me strangely, ‘Andrew, your mum has multiple sclerosis’. I froze, he was correct of course, she had been diagnosed in the late 70’s and it had got gradually worse. By that stage, in the early 90’s she was starting to use walking sticks to get around and walked very slowly. I froze, because I had never seen it as a ‘big problem’. I was so upset and ran to the phones to call home. (In those days it was quite complicated to do that!) I spoke to my mum and told her about my roommate and how upset I was, and I apologized for not seeing her disability as a problem.
I will never forget what she said to me ‘Andrew, I am so glad you don’t see my M.S as a problem, I don’t want to be defined by my disability’. ‘But Mum’ I pressed, ‘There are things you can’t do due to the M.S.’ Her reply has stayed with me till today. ‘I have never seen my life as what I can’t do, but what I can.’ My Mum refused to define herself as a victim, of someone to be pitied. What she achieved despite her M.S was simply remarkable. However, it wasn’t just that, she lost almost her entire family in the Shoah, only her mother, escaping while pregnant with her, made it out of the inferno alive. She lived during her childhood in extreme poverty and moving from place to place. Yet even then she had a positive demeanour and everyone who knew her back then told me that they never heard her complain. In all the years I had the honour of knowing her – I can concur with that statement. Unfortunately, the West is cursed with the opposite today ‘victim culture’ is very much in vogue across large swathes of populations in first world countries. In 2014 Bradley Campbell and Jason Manning wrote a paper entitled Microaggression and Moral Cultures published in the journal Comparative Sociology. Campbell and Manning argue that accusations of microaggression focus on unintentional slights, unlike the Civil rights movement, which focused on concrete injustices. They argue that the purpose of calling attention to microaggressions is to elevate the status of offended victim. "When the victims publicize microaggressions,” wrote Campbell and Manning “they call attention to what they see as the deviant behaviour of the offenders. In doing so,” they “also call attention to their own victimization.” They do this because it lowers “the offender’s moral status” and “raises the moral status of the victims”. Ki Tavo this week has two main focusses – Bikurim – the first fruits and the Tochecha – the horrific curses. W i t h Bikurim, the fruits are brought to the Kohen and the presentation is accompanied by a declaration (Devarim 26:5-10) expressing one’s gratitude to Hashem, while giving over a brief history of the Jewish people. As I mentioned last year, the Alshich is bothered by a Midrash in Parshat Bereishit. The Midrash (in a play on words of the opening words of the Torah) states that the world was created for the sake of that which is called “Reishit” (first): The world was created for the sake of the nation of Israel who is called “Reishit”. Likewise, the world was created for the sake of Torah, which is called “ Reishit”. Finally, the world was created for the sake of the Mitzvah of Bikkurim, which is called “Reishit”. This is a remarkable Midrash! It equates the importance of Am Yisrael and the Torah with the singular mitzvah of Bikkurim!! The Alshich answers that the mitzvah of Bikkurim contains within it something that is fundamental to being a human being — the obligation for people to express their gratitude and hakarat haTov . HaKarat haTov is so basic and primary that the whole world’s creation was actualized just for this mitzvah, which teaches us and trains us in the attribute of gratitude.
Gratitude is severely lacking today and is the perfect antidote to victimhood. It, as my mother told me, focuses on what we have, not on what we don’t. Similarly, the Tochacha can connect back to the theme of victimhood. As Rabbi Sacks says: “Essentially, they (the Tochecha) are warnings of the terrible fate that will overtake Jews if they neglect or abandon their covenant with God. Reading them in the context of our time, after the Holocaust, they sound like terrible prefigurations of what in fact occurred. If much of Deuteronomy is a prophetic vision or dream, the tochachah is the nightmare”. If there is ever a nation that could claim victimhood status, it is us. This Wednesday we are performing our show ‘Call of the Shofar’ at Stanmore Shul, in memory of Gena Turgel MBE, to commemorate her 5 th Yahrzeit. Gena along with all the other survivors I have has the honour to meet and talk to, never spoke with hate in their hearts looking back into the void, but with love and pride in their faith, their families and the future. Gena achieved so much, never as a victim but as a messenger of truth and goodness. After the horror, the modern Tochecha, the survivors, like Gena and my Grandma, turned to Bikurim, to be grateful and to build lives and communities. My mother learned from her mother and continued that powerful, positive, life affirming mentality for her entire 81 years on this earth. Thank you mum. When she turned 80, she wrote a pictorial book, an A – Z of her life. It is a magical reminder of the life she lived and the people she loved. The last entry of the book is the following:
‘It’s been a wonderful 80 years. There have been ups and downs, yes there have been sad times but overall, it has been wonderful. I’ve seen so much, done so much, I’ve had so much that was good. I’ve laughed a lot, I have loved a lot, I’ve lived a lot.’ A remarkable woman, who was part of a remarkable people. A people who needs to internalise the last line of the Parsha. A parsha that began with the importance of gratitude and almost ends with the failures of a nation.
‘And you shall observe the words of this covenant and fulfil them, in order that you will succeed in all that you do.’ (Devarim 29:8) Amen Shabbat Shalom
Apply
Book Here
Purchase Tzurba M'Rabanan
Mizrachi (UK) Israel Support Trust | 44a Albert Road, London, NW4 2SJ United Kingdom Unsubscribe uk@mizrachi.org
Update Profile |Our Privacy Policy |Constant Contact Data Notice Sent byuk@mizrachi.org