Adjusting Discipline for Compassion
Frame Things Positively Students with SEB needs may have negative thinking or play negative loops in their head about themselves (Ingram, n.d.; Minahan, 2019). When they experience a mistake or an incident that is aversive, they may play this loop, thereby adding on to an already uncomfortable experience (Minahan, 2019). This places teachers in a delicate position, as they frequently address mistakes and can’t avoid correcting students’ errors or unwanted behavior. To manage this, a teacher can convey positive regard to a student, despite needing to address an error. Keep in mind that the classroom should have a high ratio (five to one) of positive to negative feedback to create a supportive environment (Kern et al., 2007; Reinke et al., 2013). When addressing behavior, the teacher can frame feedback with positive intent. For example, saying, “I see you used the order of operations we discussed, but there’s one mistake with addition here” instead of bluntly saying, “You made a mistake.” Additionally, framing things positively and encouraging students to take power over their choices can benefit students in managing their emotions, using verbal encouragement such as, “Tomorrow is another chance to apply what you learned!” By framing things positively, students can learn emotion regulation
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used a few neutralizing routines amid her frustration. She first delayed responding by telling the students to turn to their neighbor and share what they’d learned so far from the discussion. With the class focused on talking to classmates, Mrs. Ladino took stock of her body and feelings and took two deep breaths to calm herself down. She then reframed the situation by thinking to herself, “OK, I’m frustrated because Janice appears to be seeking attention. Rather than be annoyed with her, let me understand it as Janice seeking connection. What connection does she need?” Mrs. Ladino then approached Janice and spoke to her privately: “You know I care about you and I want you to be connected in this class, but your comments are off task. Let’s talk at the next break.” Feeling calmer, Mrs. Ladino continued her discussion. After class, Mrs. Ladino was able to speak to Janice about how Janice’s comments were disruptive, and Mrs. Ladino specifically asked the student what she needed so that she would feel more connected in class. They both understood each other’s needs after the discussion; Janice understood why her comments were so disruptive, and Mrs. Ladino understood why Janice needed connection during those moments.
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