JULY 2015
Richard and Cheryl Mills of Inver Grove Heights
Finding love online Minnesotans over 50 dish on dating in the digital age Page 28
Beware of boomerang kids Page 26
BEWARE OF EXPLORE THE Happy birthday, beehive‘SAN hair! FRAN OF BOOMERANG Page 12 KIDS THE MIDWEST’ Page 26
Page 20
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BEEHIVE HAIR! Page 12
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Contents 20
Good Start
Going to Galena ‘The San Francisco of the Midwest’ is a treasure for tourists — and it’s only five hours from the Twin Cities.
My Turn 10 I’ve been to “heaven’s waiting room.” Here’s what I’ve learned. Memories 12 Hairstyles come and go, and we women just keep following along.
28
Seniors seeking same
Minnesotans age 50 and older share their stories of dating in the digital age.
This Month in MN History 14 1851 treaty escalates tensions between Dakota, settlers.
Good Health House Call 16 Celiac disease is serious, but wheat isn’t poisonous for the rest of us. Caregiving 18 So-called informal caregivers are important, yet hidden in plain sight.
Good Living Housing 24 Prevent accidents by taking simple steps in key areas of your home.
Corrections
Finance 26 Before taking in ‘boomerang’ kids, set expectations and boundaries.
In the June issue of Minnesota Good Age, the last ingredient and the last two steps for the cherry clafoutis recipe were omitted. The last ingredient is “8 ounces cherries, pitted (fresh or frozen).” And the last two steps are: “Pour the batter into the buttered pie dish and arrange the cherries evenly in the batter. Place the pie dish on an ovenproof tray and bake for about 40 minutes or until puffy and golden brown on the edges.” For a copy of the corrected recipe, go to issuu.com/ mngoodage (Page 27) or email editor@mngoodage.com.
In the Kitchen 27 Cool off this summer with popsicles made with natural ingredients.
In the June issue of Minnesota Good Age, incorrect dates and events were listed for the Minneapolis Aquatennial. This year’s festival will be downsized from 10 days to four (July 22–25), and the annual sandcastle competition and milk-carton boat races won’t be happening. See aquatennial.com.
Can’t-Miss Calendar
6 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
36
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50,000 copies of Minnesota Good Age are distributed to homes and businesses metro-wide. Minnesota Good Age (ISSN 2333-3197) is published monthly byMinnesota Premier Publications. Minnesota Good Age, 1115 Hennepin Ave. Minneapolis, MN 55403 Š 2015 Minnesota Premier Publications, Inc. Subscriptions are $12 per year.
Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 7
Good Start / From the Editor / Sarah Dorison
Looking for love? One of the things many couples look forward to in retirement is sharing the golden years together. But what happens when you get to that stage of life and you find yourself … all alone? In this issue, we’re featuring some amazing stories from a variety of Minnesota men and women who’ve found themselves in just such a position. Divorced, widowed or single, they all landed in the modern dating world — including online dating — in their later years. Their stories are fascinating as well as exciting! Seniors, it turns out, have become the fastest-growing segment of the population to seek love online. (And the stigma attached to online dating is quickly disappearing.) Mike Howard of Brainerd met his wife, Sue Eichler, on the popular free dating site Plenty of Fish (pof.com). His advice? If you’re going to start dating later in life, join social groups (including singles groups), but also check out your options online. “Online dating gives you so much more potential,” he said. “You are meeting so many more people than you can meet at church or the grocery store. In the singles group, you may meet 25 people. But online you can maybe meet 1,000 people.” Judith Haphey — another woman featured in the online dating story in this issue — had previously lost her husband of 30 years when she started online dating. It wasn’t quick or easy, but she eventually met her second husband, Rick, on eHarmony.com. They were living 300 miles part in Minnesota at the time. Judith Haphey said: “Life is going to keep on going. Don’t let it pass you by.”
Sarah Dorison, Editor 8 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
Good Start / My Turn / Dave Nimmer And don’t add to the potential for mockery and ridicule by wearing T-shirts with writing on them — slogans, sayings or sentiments. “World’s Best Grandpa” is not only an obvious exaggeration, but it’s also an insult to any of the other grandfathers passing by. Don’t play the Power Ball if you’re driving a Land Rover. One old boy at the Safeway store rolled up in his Rover, walked up to the customer service counter and bought a handful of Power Ball tickets. My thinking is: You’re already rich. And you’re old. You’ve got all the money you can spend.
Sing it out (and listen, too) On the brighter side in Green Valley, I
Lessons for the over-70 set →→What we can learn from ‘heaven’s waiting room’
Being a senior citizen, I spend a lot more time than I used to observing my fellow travelers, and nowhere was the elder watch more intense than on a recent trip to Green Valley, Ariz., a community south of Tucson that’s been hailed by the hopeful as “heaven’s waiting room.” I don’t know that I possess the ticket for admission, but I’m certain, after three
saw and heard some men who made me proud to be among them. It began with a “Hymn Sing” prior to a Lenten service in an ELCA Lutheran church on the southern outskirts of Green Valley. The congregation sang four or five hymns, and they were in tune, on time, loud and lively. I heard the women, all right, but I also heard tenors, basses and baritones. These old boys were singing, not just mouthing the words. That’s the active part of my penchant to have more music in my life as I get older. The other part is listening, and Cindy
weeks of watching other old men, of what I will and won’t do while I’m still walking,
Lamont and I listened to the Tucson
talking and waiting on this side of the soil.
Symphony in a performance that
It’s my Sensible Senior Survival System, designed for men over 70.
Avoidable faux pas The first commandment is obvious: Don’t EVER, ever wear shorts with black socks
included Mendelssohn, Beethoven and Schumann at the Green Valley recreation center. In the audience, the heads were grey,
and leather shoes. It makes it too easy for the millennials to mock us, fulfilling the
the dress was casual and the walking
stereotype with our knobby knees, spindly legs and wobbly gait. No, if you want to
was frequently assisted — with canes and
wear shorts, pair ‘em with ankle socks and sneakers.
walkers. But at the end of the concert,
10 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
everybody I could see was on his or her feet, clapping. Some of the men did more than clap. I saw at least 10 of them holding hands with partners as they walked to cars in the parking lot. Kind of neat, I thought, that they were still holding hands with their sweethearts, 40 years after exchanging vows, having kids and settling differences.
Passion for politics Finally, I was impressed by the seniors who still had some passion to accompany their politics, be it left or right, liberal or conservative. One of them was manning the Democrat Party Headquarters in a Green Valley strip mall. The day I saw him he was sitting at a table in front of the building, apparently to blend in with a two-day, outdoor, upscale flea market. The grey-haired Democrat eagerly engaged the passersby with chatter about the newly adopted Republican budget that trimmed almost $100 million from the state’s universities and community colleges. Meanwhile, the legislature was about to consider allowing citizens to carry sawed-off shotguns and handguns with silencers. Hopefully, neither would be available to the critics of the governor and the legislators. Dave Nimmer has had a long career as a reporter, editor and professor. Send comments or questions to dnimmer@ mngoodage.com.
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4/23/15 3:19/PM Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 11
Good Start / Memories / By Carol Hall Some wag journalist quipped, “Seven people could live in her hair.”
The lengths we’d go Well, I tried them all. I tried them all. To achieve these styles meant utilizing various coiffure tools. Bobby pins, which, early on, were used to set hair, eventually were replaced by rollers — including the dreaded “brush rollers” that caused considerable scalp pain (and even a little hair loss). Regular applications of generous quantities of Dippity-do gel became a must to keep the style in place. I wrapped toilet paper around my head at bedtime until I discovered that a satin pillowcase, which lets hair slide around and not flatten out, worked better. Indeed, keeping up with stylish hairdos took time and effort. But of all the styles I tried, the beehive was the highest maintenance. (It also was the most outlandish.) It required
Piling it on for (hair) style →→Dippity-do, Aqua Net and more helped women stay in fashion
When it comes to hair, most men stick with the same style they’ve always worn without ever contemplating a new look.
me to sleep with my hair set with large, empty frozen lemonade cans. In the morning I’d backcomb it to within an inch of its life, pile it high atop my head and spray it solid with Aqua Net. I was Marge Simpson! I was The Supremes!
Happy anniversary, beehive The beehive turned 55 this year. It came about when Modern Beauty Shop magazine asked award-winning hair stylist Margaret Vinci Heldt, operator of
But not women. We embrace change and we follow celebrity trends.
Margaret Vinci Coiffures on Chicago’s
Remember Meg Ryan’s shaggy-dog look? There was Princess Di’s short sweptback
ritzy Michigan Avenue, to design a new
and Farah Faucett’s long sweptback, which sold a lot of curling irons. Jackie Kennedy’s chic bob went perfectly with hats. And who can ever forget Pricilla Presley’s enormous ultra-bouffant for her wedding to Elvis? 12 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
hairstyle to usher in the 1960s. The flip, the pageboy and the French twist had run their course; it was time
Travel With Us On Your Next Vacation! for something really different. A little fez-style cap, decorated with beaded bees, inspired Heldt. “I liked the hat because when I took it off, my hairstyle stayed in place,” she said. “It stayed in good. You could
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Good Start / This Month in Minnesota History / By Lauren Peck
Treaty escalates tensions between settlers, Dakota For thousands of years, Traverse des Sioux, a shallow crossing of
would forcibly take the land from
the Minnesota River in St. Peter, was an important meeting place and crossroads for
them anyway.
American Indians. In 1851, the site marked a significant turning point in Minnesota history — the signing of the Treaty of Traverse des Sioux. By signing the treaty on July 23, 1851, and another treaty later that year, the Dakota
After the Dakota chiefs of the Sisseton and Wahpeton bands signed two copies of the treaty, they were
ceded 24 million acres of their land — nearly half of present-day Minnesota — to the
directed to sign another piece of paper
U.S. government. Dakota leaders, including Sleepy Eye and Extended Tail Feathers,
held by a fur trader, John R. Brown.
and government representatives — led by Luke Lea, commissioner of Indian Affairs,
None of the officials read or trans-
and Minnesota territorial governor Alexander Ramsey — negotiated at Traverse des
lated the paper, and several of the chiefs
Sioux for several days with dramatically different agendas.
signed it, assuming it was another copy
Food, land, fur trading
of the treaty. The document, known as the
The U.S. government aimed to increase settlements in the West while the Dakota
Traders’ Paper, was actually an agree-
were struggling to maintain their way of life. By 1850, the animals they hunted
ment directing the government to use
for food and trade were less abundant, and the treaty offered resources, including
treaty money to pay off various debts
annual payments in cash and goods, which promised to help them survive.
that local fur traders claimed the tribes
The Dakota also feared that if they didn’t sell their lands, the government 14 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
owed them.
⊳⊳ Frank B. Mayer, a witness to the negotiations and signing of the Treaty of Traverse des Sioux, painted this piece in 1885. Photo courtesy of the Minnesota Historical Society
Tensions rise Many Dakota were angry about this third document, which gave more than a third of their cash to the traders. Dakota leaders wrote a letter to the government protesting the paper’s requirements. Congress later investigated Ramsey for fraud in connection with the 1851 treaty negotiations, but he was acquitted and the Traders’ Paper was enforced. By 1862, these growing tensions between the Dakota and U.S. government erupted into the U.S.-
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Today Traverse des Sioux is a Minnesota Historical Society site managed by the Nicollet County Historical Society. If you’re looking for a summer day trip from the Twin Cities, you can explore with a Minnesota River Valley mobile tour and travel to sites important to the U.S.-Dakota War of 1862, such as Traverse des Sioux, Lower Sioux Agency, Birch Coulee Battlefield and Fort Ridgely. The mobile tour allows you to call in and hear the stories of sites that shaped the history and future of Minnesota. To start your tour, call 888-601-3010 or visit mnhs.org or usdakotawar.org. Lauren Peck is a media relations and social media associate for the Minnesota Historical Society. Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 15
Good Health / House Call / By Michael Spilane exist. Because of the induced inflammatory damage to the bowel wall, intolerance to gluten is often associated with impaired absorption of proteins, minerals and other substances essential for good health. Weight loss is common. Fatigue may be caused by iron-deficiency anemia and osteoporosis may result from deficiency of calcium.
Celiac disease is serious
About 1 percent of Americans suffer from celiac disease, an ailment caused by intolerance to gluten.
→→But portraying wheat as poisonous to all is silly
You’d probably be a bit upset if your physician advised you to stop
Diagnosis, diet In a person suspected of having celiac
eating bread, rolls, cereals, pizza, pasta, cake, cookies, gravies and any other food
disease, the first step in diagnosis
containing flour.
is checking the blood for abnormal
Did I list beer?
antibodies produced when gluten is
But you’d be obedient if the doctor also told you these foods were causing your
ingested. Declaring a definitive diag-
abdominal pain, bloating, diarrhea, loss of energy and sense of general ill-being. About 1 percent of Americans suffer from celiac disease, an ailment caused by intolerance to gluten. Gluten is a protein complex found in wheat, rye, barley and a couple of other less common grains.
nosis also requires a bowel biopsy specimen (endoscopically obtained) and a dramatic improvement in symptoms after instituting total avoidance of dietary gluten. Some gastroenterologists are comfort-
Symptoms
able diagnosing the affliction without a
Genetically susceptible individuals develop an immune-mediated reaction within
bowel biopsy if abnormal antibodies are
the bowel when gluten is ingested. This results in the production of an antibody that
detected in the blood — and symptoms
damages cells within the bowel and, in severe cases, also damages cells in other parts
resolve with the avoidance of gluten.
of the body. Symptoms of celiac disease most commonly are digestive in type, but myriad symptoms relating to general health or to organ systems other than the bowel may 16 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
While it’s always difficult to adhere to a gluten-free diet, the increasing commercial availability of foods prepared
with grains other than wheat, rye and barley (for example, corn and rice) are making life more tolerable for those with gluten intolerance.
Sensitivity, wheat zealots While celiac disease affects 1 percent of Americans, scientific studies suggest that an additional 3 to 5 percent of Americans have what’s termed “gluten sensitivity.” These people have symptoms that improve or resolve with avoidance of dietary gluten, but blood tests are negative and biopsies are normal. While there’s abundant evidence that celiac disease is a true disease entity, gluten sensitivity is far less understood. Beware, meanwhile, of the many self-styled anti-grain experts who believe that grains are poisons that cause or exacerbate dozens of illnesses. Poisons for all of us! This very vocal group is much like a cult; they adhere to a strict set of beliefs that aren’t rooted in scientific evidence. Eating ordinary pasta, pizza and cake is clearly unwise for anyone with celiac disease; and eating too much pasta, pizza and cake is probably not a good idea for anyone. But portraying these foods as general poisons, is simply nonsense. Dr. Michael Spilane spent more than four decades practicing and teaching geriatric medicine in St. Paul. Send comments to drspilane@ mngoodage.com.
Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 17
Good Health / Caregiving / By Beth Wiggins
Hidden in plain sight →→Relied-upon caregivers are largely ignored
realities of caregiving — minimize the role, too, by calling this group of people “informal” caregivers, ostensibly to differentiate them from paid or professional providers of care.
Once you start paying attention to your own caregiving experience, you
Untrained, unskilled
begin to see caregiving everywhere around you.
Fact: Caregivers perform health-care
Just in my own small circle of friends, there’s a sister watching over her brother
tasks that are unfamiliar, often scary
who lives with mental illness, a woman supporting the post-surgery days of her
and need to be done right. People being
partner, a son helping his mother adjust to a recent move, a wife who lovingly hovers
cared for in home settings are in the
around her husband as he relearns how to walk and an aunt encouraging a strug-
midst of much more complex medical
gling niece while giving respite to her parents.
situations than ever before, requiring
I spot it in strangers, too: The patient companion with the elder at the grocery store
specialized equipment, complex medica-
is a caregiver. So is the man in the church parking lot lifting the wheelchair out of the
tion schedules and stressful procedures
trunk of the car and bringing it around to his waiting passenger. And I’m pretty sure
— things that no one taught us in school.
a woman I saw at the pharmacy late one night was also a caregiver.
And yet ... It is expected that caregivers
Caregiving is everywhere.
will do these things: Their willingness
But, even though the ranks of caregivers are burgeoning, public discourse and
and capability are assumed. Caregivers
policy haven’t kept up. It’s as though caregivers are hidden in plain sight.
Utilized but dismissed
receive little or no training to give them skill or confidence, and they aren’t routinely acknowledged or included as
Fact: The vast majority of care currently happens at home by unpaid caregivers
the essential part of the care team that
— spouses, sons, daughters, friends — who manage medications, do the grocery shop-
they are.
ping, arrange medical appointments, help people in and out of bed, monitor health and safety, cook special diets and more. These caregivers are the most long-standing and heavily utilized providers of
Family-leave policies far behind
long-term care in our society. And they’re becoming increasingly precious as the
Fact: More than 6 in 10 family care-
demographic balance shifts.
givers are employed, and 49 percent
One way of looking at this is called the caregiver ratio. The ratio of people in the most
of the current workforce expects to be
common elder-caregiving age range (45 to 64) to those at most risk for needing care (80
providing eldercare in the near future.
and older) is shrinking fast, from more than 7-to-1 in 2010, to 4-to-1 in 2030 and less
Almost 70 percent of employed care-
than 3-to-1 in 2050.
givers report needing to reduce their
And yet ... The importance and value of what caregivers contribute remains unrecognized, often described in quite dismissive language. We caregivers are our own worst enemies when it comes to elevating the value of what we do in the minds of the greater community. We say we’re “just” being a
hours, take unpaid leave or make other adjustments in order to meet their caregiving responsibilities. Since older adults will outnumber
good daughter, loyal husband, helpful friend. Many push through the physical,
school-aged children just five years from
psychological and financial strain brought on by caregiving as though they are
now, it stands to reason that the nature
normal consequences for which there’s no remedy. Then they pile on expressions
of caregiving will tip toward the old.
of inadequacy when their efforts don’t seem to measure up to expectations.
Employees need workplace flexibility
Experts in the field of aging — who typically have a good understanding of the 18 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
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Awareness is growing and new bills are working their way through the legislative process, so there are signs of momentum building. But the caregiver’s voice is still quiet. Those caregivers, hidden in plain sight, are probably too busy to muster up a movement themselves. But how about the rest of us? Beth Wiggins is director of caregiver support and aging services at FamilyMeans, which has been serving family caregivers for more than 25 years. Stillwater-based FamilyMeans is a member of the St. Paul-based Metropolitan Caregiver Services Collaborative. Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 19
Good Living / Travel
Go to Galena!
The ‘San Francisco of the Midwest’ features high bluffs, picturesque scenery, architecture, history and excellent eats By Carla Waldemar
Halleluia! The War Between the States has ended! Exactly 150 years ago, the Union’s Gen. Ulysses S. Grant returned in triumph to his hometown of Galena, Illinois, welcomed by 14,000 settlers — many of them miners hewing lead from the surrounding hills. Galena, a booming river port, was bigger than Chicago back when its citizens presented Grant with a brick mansion in gratitude for victory. Today the historic town has tapered to 3,500 residents, and tourism has supplanted the mines and river as its driving force. (And because it’s in the very tip of the northwestern corner of the state, it’s only a five-hour drive from the Twin Cities.) Visitors — served by 35 vintage B&Bs — come to admire Galena’s gorgeous Georgian homes, churches and 20 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
to the iconic, room-size Peace and Union painting commemorating that event, where he’s portrayed aside Lee, along with his own generals (nine of whom came from Galena). The museum also reveals the story of the native tribes who first lived here and the lead mines that produced the battles’ bullets. The DeSoto House hotel, where both Grant and Lincoln gave speeches, still anchors Main Street. Grab a brochure at the desk for a self-guided tour, or return for an evening Ghost Tour of Main Street ▲▲Stroll along Galena’s Main Street to shop art galleries, antiques stores and eclectic boutiques, including many housed in historic structures built in the 1850s. ⊳⊳ Galena’s Welcome Center is part of the historic Old Market House, an 1845 brick building showcasing the Greek Revival architectural style. Photos courtesy of visitgalena.org.
to encounter — well, maybe — the mysterious Lady in Black. Galena’s sidewalks (and stairways) will give you a free aerobics workout, or you can rent off-road Segways, kayaks, bikes or skis to enjoy the surrounding country-
businesses from the 1850s, which have placed virtually the entire town on the National
side. Sign up for fishing, golf and hot-air
Registry of Historic Places.
balloon expeditions.
Thanks to its entrancing vintage architecture and near-vertical hills, it’s called The San Francisco of the Midwest.
Or simply kick back …
Shop and sip
Explore U.S. history
Main Street is a shopper’s Eden of
Here, in this corner of the map where Illinois, Wisconsin and Iowa convene, you can
independent enterprises like Root Beer
tour the General’s bluff-top mansion, where he trained troops on the front lawn.
Revelry (mix and match a six-pack from
His statue oversees nearby Grant Park. Gazing across the river, his likeness looks
Visitors come to admire Galena’s enclave of gorgeous Georgian homes, churches and businesses from the 1850s, which have placed virtually the entire town on the National Registry of Historic Places.
down on his more modest original dwelling on High Street; his father’s leather shop,
old-time brands like Dad’s, Mom’s and Capt’n Eli’s). At Upcycle Gypsy, the proprietor offers handmade jewelry and ladies’ finery.
where a young Grant was put to work;
Hungry? It’s impossible to resist the
the Methodist church of 1829 where he
wares at Sweetheart Bakery or the aroma
worshiped; and the gazebo of the Abbey
at Galena Garlic Co., offering rubs,
House, now a B&B, where he puffed many a
powders, pickles and more.
cigar with his cronies. The Old Market House of 1845 is now
Studios of local artists join antiques shops, filling the gaps between the town’s
a museum honoring the General-then-
wealth of indie eateries (27 restaurants
President, complete with a box of his prized
and nary a chain among them) and
stogies, his top hat and the document of
stops for liquid refreshment like Galena
surrender he penned for Gen. Robert E. Lee
Brewing Company and Galena Cellars,
to sign.
which offers a location downtown — or
The Galena and U.S. Grant Museum, housed in another red-brick beauty, is home
you can taste at the vineyard (and stay over, too, at an on-site guest house). Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 21
Go to Galena!
The 50-mile-long Galena River, which flows into the upper Mississippi River, is one of many natural attractions in the area. Photos courtesy of visitgalena.org.
Tour Rocky Waters Vineyard and Winery — just a short, pretty drive into the hills — or Blaum Bros. Distilling Co., newly founded by two brothers who use local grains to power their spirits. Enjoy sips of moonshine, vodka and gin during the finale of the distillery tour.
Dining out? Yes! At One Eleven Main the chef celebrates local farmers’ wares within historic brick walls, where guests swoon over beer-braised pot roast or salmon with brandied sweet potatoes. Down the street, Fritz and Frites features French culinary icons such as mussels and cassoulet as well as German fare such as sauerbraten and schnitzels. Galena’s oldest restaurant, the Log Cabin Steakhouse — a vintage supper club — has served its hand-cut beef since 1935 under the caring eye of the same family, who still sear steaks Greek-style, then side them with way-too-delicious hash browns. Chef Ivo’s Place, a block away, claims to offer the best barbecue in town, and his pulled pork and ribs support his boast. Fried Green Tomatoes offers Italian food with cosmopolitan, modern tones. Cross over to Vinny Vanucchi’s for the real, old-time deal, celebrating Nonna’s recipes for red sauce and her homemade bread that flies out the door in doggie bags. Breakfast? It doesn’t get better than the omelets at the Golden Hen Cafe, served with a surprise complimentary side of rice pudding. You can also savor a multi-course morning feast at your choice of B&Bs, including Abe’s Spring Street Guest House — a former brewery now housing guests and sophisticated ceramics by the owner-artist himself, Charles Fach. Be sure to check out the gift shop! Carla Waldemar is an award-winning food/travel/arts writer. She edits the annual Zagat Survey of Twin Cities restaurants and writes food and travel articles for publications around the world. She lives in Uptown.
22 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
→→Learn more For a list of Galena’s frequent festivals and events — everything from Wine Lovers Weekend in early spring to the Galena Halloween Parade & Festival in the fall (the silliest parade of its kind in the Midwest) — see visitgalena.org.
Good Living / Housing / By John Stuck You should also think about how slippery the floors are. A bathmat is a good idea, especially outside of the shower. Make sure the mat isn’t so thick, however, that it becomes a tripping hazard. Make sure it has a grippy rubber backing so it doesn’t slide around. Finally, check the temperature of the water in your home. Set it no higher than 120 degrees. This is especially important for homes where someone is suffering from dementia.
Bedroom The bedroom is the second-most dangerous room for aging adults. The first and most important thing is to make sure there’s easy access to a phone. Look for tripping hazards created by furniture, clothing or knick-knacks. You
SENIOR HOME SAFETY
→→Prevent accidents with simple steps in key areas of your home
should be able to easily move around the room. Keep lighting in mind, too, especially at night. My favorite trick is to put a rope light — similar to what’s used in movie theaters — under the bed. It will provide some soft, indirect light to help
Your home should be a safe haven, yet 85 percent of seniors have done nothing to prepare their homes for aging. Our research shows that a third of all trips to the ER are caused by falls or accidents at home, and nearly half of those could have been prevented. Before it happens to you or someone you love, take the time to do a home-safety inspection. Falls are the most common home accident. There are four rooms where physicians say most home injuries occur:
Bathroom Sixty-nine percent of all home accidents happen in the bathroom. This should be your first stop on your home-safety inspection. Make sure there are grab bars around the shower, bathtub and toilet. You can get temporary ones that stick to the walls with suction cups, but I find the bars that screw into the walls are more reliable. 24 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
light the way at night. You can put it on a timer, to make it easy and efficient.
Kitchen There’s one main goal here: Eliminate the need for a step stool! Take all of the most commonly used items and move them to cabinets and shelves that are easily accessible. I also recommend hanging an emergency contact list on the fridge or by the phone. It’s also a good idea to also carry a copy in your purse or wallet.
South St. Paul HRA Stairs
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Finally, check all stairwells. Make sure
• Income Based Rent
there are sturdy handrails. You may
• All Utilities Paid
also want to think about installing
• Newly Remodeled
handrails on both sides of the stairway.
• Elevators
My mother favors her left shoulder.
• Controlled Entries
Having a handrail on both sides makes
• On Site Caretaker
it much easier for her to go up and down the stairs. If the stairs are slippery, you can quickly and inexpensively install
bottom step another color or put a
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Personal-alert systems
system with a wristband or pendant. Popular brands include Rescue Alert, Philips Lifeline and MobileHelp. Many people don’t think they need them. And I have clients who say the same thing. But I also have clients who’ve bought them and then swear
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these devices saved their lives.
Think prevention ER doctors say they often hear this comment after a home accident: “I knew something like this would happen.” Take these important steps now to protect yourself and your loved ones — and to keep your “home sweet home” safe. John Stuck is a senior care expert and co-owner of Home Instead Senior Care of Maple Grove. To download a home-safety checklist, go to homeinsteadmsp.com or call 763-634-8247 for more information. National Senior Games GA 0715 H4.indd 1
6/18/15 11:39/ AM Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 25
Good Living / Finance / By Skip Johnson
HELPING ‘BOOMERANG’ KIDS
→→Before financially assisting adult children, consider these tips
Parents often dread the day their babies grow up and leave the
Plan ahead
nest. But there’s another day many families are starting to fear — the day their
When it comes to paying for their kids’
kids move back home.
college education, parents give it a
There’s a term for these adult children who are moving back in with their
higher priority than saving for retire-
parents — boomerang kids. More than a third of baby boomers are supporting
ment. To prevent having to make this
boomerang kids, and that may be putting their financial futures at risk.
decision, parents should start saving
A recent study from the research firm Hearts & Wallets shows parents age 65 and older who have financially independent children are more than twice
early, when their kids are still in diapers. I recommend my clients set up a dedi-
as likely to be retired than those who are financially supporting their children.
cated account, like a 529 tax-deferred
Those who are helping children are also more anxious about their financial
college savings plan to save for kids’
situations and have lower risk tolerance.
college education.
Before rolling out the welcome mat, parents should take some important steps to ensure financial harmony within the family:
Set limits
Put retirement first Parents need to make sure they’re on track for their own retirement before
Parents should establish clear boundaries and expectations before writing a big
taking on extra responsibilities for their
check or letting a child move back home. Limiting the length of time kids can live
kids. I tell my clients that they should be
at home, setting a date they’re expected to find a job and listing the child’s house-
putting 15 percent into a 401k or IRA.
hold chores and financial contributions are some examples. This should be established up front, so parents and kids don’t fall into the
If they’re not able to do so, I encourage them to at least put in enough money
patterns they had before the child went to college, when parents took care of almost
to get their company match. More
everything.
than a third of people aren’t taking full
Team up Mom and Dad must be on the same page when it comes to figuring out how to help adult children. If one parent is slipping the children money without the
advantage of their employer’s match, according to a recent study by Vanguard. That’s like throwing away free money. If these steps sound harsh, I think it’s
other one knowing or approving, that can damage the marriage. It’s crucial for
important to remind parents that their
couples to remain honest with each other and not keep financial secrets.
child can take out student loans, home
Help, not handouts Instead of giving adult children money, parents can help with some financial
loans, car loans and more. But there are no retirement loans for parents.
and professional mentoring. They can teach crucial skills, like budgeting, managing credit cards, proofreading resumes and preparing for interviews. This is the kind of support that will really benefit them in the long run.
26 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
Skip Johnson is a partner at Great Waters Financial in New Hope. Learn more at mygreatwaters.com.
Good Living / In the Kitchen / By Megan Devine
Cool pops! Fruity iced-tea pops
Watermelon-mint pops
Fold together fruit in a medium-sized bowl. Add fruit to popsicle molds. Pour iced tea over fruit to fill molds. Freeze until firm (about 8 hours or overnight).
Place ingredients in a blender. Puree until smooth. Pour into popsicle molds. Freeze until firm.
1 cup blueberries 1 cup raspberries 1 peeled, sliced peach 1 peeled, sliced kiwi 2 cups (16 ounces) prepared iced tea
3½ cups seeded, cubed fresh watermelon ¼ cup cold water 1 tablespoon freshly squeezed lime juice 6-8 mint leaves Pinch of sugar (optional)
→→Easy-peasy popsicle molds
Photo by Megan Devine
Lemon-lime basil pops
½ cup lemon juice (juice from 2 lemons) 3 tablespoons lime juice (juice from 1 lime) 20 fresh basil leaves ¼ cup white sugar 1 cup water Place all ingredients in a blender and blend until smooth. Use cheesecloth or a mesh strainer to separate any lingering solid material. Pour into popsicle molds. Freeze until firm.
If you’re planning to make homemade popsicles this summer, skip the dollar aisle and go for the Zoku Classic Pop Molds ($14.99). These molds make six popsicles. They’re easy to use and simple to clean. And you don’t need Zoku’s countertop popsicle machine ($49.99) to use them. Simply pop them in the freezer.
Megan Devine adapted these recipes craftyemmakate.tumblr.com and zoku.com. She lives in Northeastern Minnesota and blogs at kidsandeggs.com. Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 27
Judith Haphey met her husband, Rick, on the dating site eHarmony.com 10 years ago while they were living 300 miles apart in Minnesota.
28 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
Finding love online Local seniors share their stories of dating — virtual and in person — in the digital age By Jodie Tweed
I
n 2000, Sue Eichler divorced her husband of 27 years and moved 60 miles away to start a new career — and her new life as a single woman.
Eichler, who worked as a teacher for 30 years, took a job in
office administration at a small operation in Blaine where she worked with only three men — all married. She joined a church group with the hope of meeting friends and perhaps, a prospective love interest. But she soon discovered everyone involved was already paired up. She joined a health club for the same reason, but that didn’t work either. She took a part-time job at a clothing store in an effort to meet women friends. “I was even looking for girlfriends because I knew nobody,” she explained. “I was very lonely. I’m too old for clubs, and I’m intimidated by walking into a bar alone. I know young girls can do it, but their attitudes are totally different than us old farts.” Eichler’s story, however, ended well, thanks to the expanding popularity of online dating among the over-50 set.
Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 29
Finding love online Fastest-growing demographic The Internet has certainly made it easier to cast a wide net in search of a prospective partner or soul mate, all with a simple click of a mouse or swipe of a touchscreen. And seniors, it turns out, have become the fastest-growing segment of the population to seek love online, according to a 2012 study at Bowling Green State University. The stigma attached to online dating — that it involves an element of desperation — is disappearing as more couples meet online. A 2011 international study funded by eHarmony, one of the larger online dating services, found that 36 percent of couples between the ages of 40 and 70 found their current partners online. In 1997, two years after Match.com (one of the first online dating sites) was launched, only 6 percent of singles had tried online dating. By 2009, a third of adult singles had tried one of the many mainstream or niche-dating sites — and that number continues to grow as online dating expands to social networking sites and mobile apps. The idea of online or offline dating after a divorce or death
▲▲Denny and Cindy Zwilling of Little Falls met five years ago on Match.com and were married in December 2013. Both had previously been married for more than 25 years.
of a spouse can be intimidating, but the process is convenient, flexible and can introduce you to thousands of eligible part-
looking for a husband — and that’s the attitude you have to
ners you’d likely never meet by traditional dating methods.
go in with. Out of the 50-plus guys I interacted with online, I
Starting with friendship Eichler started her online dating adventure after her collegeage son suggested she give it a try. She signed up for Plenty of Fish, a free online dating site, and began a year of “meet and greets” with many men. She would usually meet her online dates at coffee shops, or somewhere else public, for safety reasons. She searched for women friends online, too. At one point, a woman contacted her through Yahoo Singles to ask if she’d want a walking partner. They met, hit it off, and began walking around Lake Como one night a week. Eichler’s advice? “Start by looking for friends, not necessarily looking for a man,” Eichler said. “I considered it meeting new friends, not 30 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
met maybe 20 to 25 percent of them. Only one of them never showed up for coffee. I think he was married.” She met her partner, Mike Howard of Brainerd, on Plenty of Fish in 2007. After a long courtship, the couple, both 66, decided to move in together after her retirement. She bought a motor home so they could travel to warm locations in the winter and spend time up north at his home in the summer. Howard is president of Lakes Area Singles, a singles group in central Minnesota. They remain active in the group because they’ve developed friendships there. Most members of the group are in their early 60s. While he recommends joining a social group, Howard said online dating has its benefits, too. “Online dating gives you so much more potential,”
What w your le ill gacy be? You can get there. We can help.
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Finding love online
Judith and Rick Haphey, who met online, are now retired and have become full-time RVers, spending summers as campground hosts at Yellowstone National Park.
Howard said. “You are meeting so many more people than you can meet at church or the grocery store. In the singles group, you may meet 25 people. But online you can maybe meet 1,000 people.”
Bonding through grief Judith Haphey met her husband, Rick, on eHarmony.com 10 years ago, less than a year after losing her husband of nearly 30 years, Jerry. Rick Haphey had lost his spouse of nearly 34 years, Cecilia, along with his mother, in a tragic car accident. He had been the sole survivor of the crash. Although Judith and Rick were living about 300 miles apart — she lived in Pequot Lakes and he was working in North Dakota, but owned a home near Warroad — the two had much in common, including their grief. “We really had some compassion in our grief,” Judith Haphey said. “So when I would call him Jerry and he would call me Cecelia, we would laugh. We understood. Some people may take great offense to that.” They married about six months later. Rick Haphey said he and his late wife dreamed of traveling after he retired at age 60. Before they married, Rick and Judith discussed their 32 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
→→Top dating sites for seniors AARP’s Howaboutwe.com: AARP has partnered with How About We to create a senior dating experience that allows users to propose dates and find prospective dates willing to go on them. If you’ve got tickets to a performance at the Orpheum and need a date, you can post that. It’s a way to find potential mates interested in the same type of activities. eHarmony.com: Also a top online dating destination, this site uses a complicated compatibility system to find matches for you. Be prepared to spend a good deal of time up front answering multiple-choice questions. Match.com: This is one of the largest dating sites around, which can be an advantage just based on the sheer numbers of daters involved. Users can search using a variety of keywords to find matches. OurTime.com: This popular online dating site caters to people over 50. The questions are geared more toward people over 50, their interests, lifestyles and expectations, giving you more insight into your potential dates. Plenty of Fish (pof.com): This free dating site allows you to try online dating without spending money. As a result, it could offer a larger pool of prospective matches to choose from. Members may upgrade to pay for additional perks, such as removing ads and seeing who viewed your profile.
Finding love online travel plans extensively. She agreed to take an early retirement at her government job and they bought a 36-foot Fifth Wheel RV. A day after their honeymoon in July 2004, they took off to see the West Coast. They’ve been full-time RVers since late 2009, spending their summers as campground hosts at Yellowstone National Park
“How else are you going to meet people?” Cindy Zwilling said, of online dating. “We’re older; I don’t go to bars; and I don’t smoke or drink.” Not all online dating stories
and their winters as campground hosts in Florida. They return
have happy endings. Not
often to Minnesota to visit their children and grandchildren.
everyone’s truthful either.
Judith Haphey said her late husband probably wouldn’t
Denny Zwilling said he
have enjoyed life on the road, but she believes he would
met one woman for coffee
approve — and he would probably think she’d become adven-
in St. Cloud one day, and it
turous.
turned out she had posted
She recommends that anyone interested in online dating do
instead of her own on her
ship you want. Is faith important to you? Do you want to be with
online profile.
“Life is going to keep on going,” she said. “Don’t let it pass you by. Have courage, but be smart.”
Truth and fiction Cindy Zwilling, 59, of Little Falls, met her husband, Denny,
— Cindy Zwilling of Little Falls, on using dating websites
her daughter’s photo
some soul searching first: Ask yourself what type of relationsomeone who still has children at home? Do you want to travel?
How else are you going to meet people? We’re older; I don’t go to bars; and I don’t smoke or drink.
“I paid for her coffee and left,” he said. “Why in the world would you do that? When you meet, you’re going to have to explain why you lied.” Sue Sterling of Brainerd said she tried online dating for a few years while living in Coon Rapids, but gave it up. “I met one guy at Fuddrucker’s,” she said. “We went through
63, who lived in Rockville, five years ago on Match.com. They
the line and he paid for both of our hamburgers. When we sat
married in December 2013. Both were divorced. He’d been
down at the table, he said, ‘Well, I’m just going to come right
married 30 years, she’d been married 25 years.
out and say it, I’m in this for the sex.’ I pushed the hamburger right back at him and said, ‘No thanks — and good luck.’”
→→Speed dating for ages 70 and up
Singles groups work, too
The Age of Love, an independent film released in 2014, follows the adventures of a group of 30 older adults in Rochester, N.Y., who sign up for an unprecedented speed-dating event for 70- to 90-year-olds. Fearlessly candid about their needs and desires, these WWII babies soon discover how the search for love changes — or doesn’t change — with age. The 78-minute documentary film premiered at the Newport Beach Film Festival and was featured at the AARP National Expo in Boston. It will screen in venues from Sweden to Singapore in 2015 and is available for screenings at local senior venues. It explores “the undimmed passions that live on beneath wrinkled skin and thinning hair.” As one 74-year-old speed dater put it, “No one, not even my children, asks me what’s in my heart anymore.” Learn more at theAgeofLoveMovie.com.
Sterling, a Lakes Area Singles member, said the group fills a void in her life that no online dating service ever could: It’s given her friends of both genders and fun activities, like pontoon rides around Gull Lake, for example. “Going places as a lone female in the baby boomer generation holds a great stigma because our generation was raised being told you really need a man to be complete,” she said. “So many women and men fear getting out of their comfort zone, and their comfort zone was 40 years ago before they
34 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
→→Online dating tips for seniors Online dating is now the second most popular way couples meet, according to a 2012 report. The most common approach at finding love is being matched up by mutual friends. Ask around. Do some research on dating websites before making a financial commitment. Some sites, like Plenty of Fish, are free, while others, such as Match.com or eHarmony.com, charge monthly user fees. Some people believe there are better matches with pay-for-play sites versus free ones. There are niche dating sites, like ChristianMingle, CatholicMatch and JDate. com, geared toward singles with religious affiliations. Ask single friends what sites they prefer and why. Be honest. Your online profile should reflect who you are right now and what you’re interested in. Don’t post your high school graduation photo or even a photo from 10 years ago. Be safe. Meet in a public place and don’t provide any personal information. Start off with a simple meeting for coffee. If you hit it off, then find a nearby restaurant to have lunch or dinner. Always let someone know who you’re meeting and where. Don’t leave your drink unattended either. Not everyone has the best of intentions. Give it time. While an advantage of online dating is meeting many strangers who could be Mr. or Ms. Right, a disadvantage is you don’t know their friends or family. In fact, you don’t know anything about them other than what they’ve told you. Don’t rush into a serious relationship. Sit back and enjoy meeting new people, rather than worrying about whether each coffee date is The One. Be optimistic and resilient, and you’re sure to find someone special.
graduated high school. It’s OK for a woman to ask a man to dance. It’s OK for a guy to say no. It’s OK that women get up and dance together in a circle and have a ton of fun.”
On the cover
Sterling, 62, said one of the benefits of a singles group over
Richard and Cheryl Mills
online dating is that fellow members tend to warn you about
City: Inver Grove Heights
the people to stay away from. She has no interest in online
How they met: We both were on OurTime.com and, when we saw each other’s profile, we activated our accounts to communicate. We meet a couple days later and both knew there was definitely something there between us. Ten days later, we met on a dock and read letters to each other about our hopes and dreams together. Within a year, those letters were read at our wedding and it became reality.
dating now. “It’s a matter of how many frogs people are willing to kiss in search of that prince,” she said. “I would rather fish in my own pond than fish in the digital pond, because that’s how I am.” Gregg and Linda Gridley of St. Paul are coordinators of the Twin Cities-based Get Out Get Social meet-up group (meetup. com/get_out_get_social), which has nearly 6,000 members and more than 50 event organizers who set up about 15 social events each week. While he and his wife initially met through an online dating site, they didn’t start dating until after they had been friends for a few years by getting to know each other at meet-up events. They married more than two years ago. “Try both,” Gregg Gridley said of online dating and singles groups. “You have to decide what you like and what works for you.” Jodie Tweed is a freelance writer living in Pequot Lakes.
When and where they married: May 29, 2015, at Millennium Garden in Plymouth — one year to the date that we communicated for the first time on OurTime.com. Our wedding was scheduled to begin at 6:03 p.m. since our first date was on 6/3/14. Photos by Tracy Walsh Photography / tracywalshphoto.com Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 35
Can’t-Miss Calendar
July
July 3–4
Red, White and Boom →→Celebrate Independence Day at a two-day celebration hosted by the Minneapolis Park and Recreation Board. More than 60,000 people come to the downtown Minneapolis riverfront for a kids’ run, 5K, half marathon, a movie, live music, food, family-friendly activities and — the grand finale — fireworks on July 4. When: July 3–4 Where: Downtown and Northeast Minneapolis Cost: FREE. Fees apply for some events. Info: mplsredwhiteboom.com
July 3–16
National Senior Games →→More than 10,000 athletes ages 50 and older from across the nation will gather in the Twin Cities for an Olympicstyle competition. Athletes will compete in more than 20 sports, including traditional track-and-field events, swimming, horseshoes, pickleball, golf and tennis. Events are free for spectators. When: July 3–16 Where: Venues in Minneapolis, St. Paul and Bloomington Cost: FREE Info: nsga.com
Ongoing
St. Paul Walking Tours →→Take a guided tour on foot of important St. Paul sites, including The Great River Tour along the mighty Mississippi (first Wednesday of each month), The Heart of the City Tour (second Wednesday of each month) and The Rice Park Tour (third Wednesday of each month). When: 10 a.m. on select Wednesdays through September Where: Various Cost: FREE. Reservations are required. Info: landmarkcenter.org/visit/walkingtours.html
Ongoing
Closer →→This production lays bare the power of physicality and presence through a series of one-on-one dance performances in public spaces across the Twin Cities all summer. Discover how the meeting between a performer and an audience can generate new possibilities. When: Through Aug. 16 Where: Venues across the Twin Cities Cost: FREE Info: bodycartography.org 36 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
July 3–26
Don’t Drink the Water →→Woody Allen’s first play is a showcase for his trademark one-liners, gags and stand-up humor. On a trip abroad, a family from New Jersey rushes into the American embassy — behind Iron Curtain — two steps ahead of the police who suspect them of spying. But it’s not much of a refuge; the ambassador is gone and his monumentally inept son is in charge. When: Weekends July 3–26 Where: Theatre in the Round Players, Minneapolis Cost: $22 Info: theatreintheround.org or 612-333-3010
July 8–29
July 10–11
Music in the Cafe
An Enemy of the People
→→Enjoy performances by talented musicians in the center’s atrium space. Bring a lunch or purchase one from Anita’s Cafe.
→→The Powderhorn Theatre Arts players will present Hendrik Ibsen’s classic, updated to reflect the culture of a town in the Minnesota Iron Range during the early 1950s.
When: Noon July 8, 15, 22 and 29 (Wednesdays) Where: Landmark Center, St. Paul Cost: FREE Info: landmarkcenter.org/music.html
July 9–12
Hamel Rodeo & Bull Ridin’ Bonanza →→This 35th-annual event features professional rodeo cowboys and cowgirls competing. Kids can take part in a kids’ calf scramble and a stick horserace. Proceeds will benefit organizations in Hamel and the surrounding area. When: 7:30 pm July 9–12 with a special family matinee at 1 p.m. July 11 Where: Corcoran Lions Park, Maple Grove Cost: $9–$18. All matinee tickets are $9. Info: hamelrodeo.org
July 9–26
Fresh Ink →→The Illusion Theater’s summer series features a satirical one-person play (Dr. Deep — Shake Your Noggin Like a Bobblehead), a true-life story based on an unlikely friendship (Yussle the Muscle: A Fable from the Sweet Science of Bruising) and a boundary-stretching physical theater piece (I’ll Be Trying To Be There). When: July 9–11, 16–19 and 23–26, respectively Where: Cowles Center for Dance and the Performing Arts, Minneapolis Cost: $15-20 single tickets: $36 for two plays; $51 for three plays Info: illusiontheater.org or 612-339-4944
When: 6:30 p.m. July 10–11 Where: Powderhorn Park’s south side, with Powderhorn Lake as a backdrop Cost: FREE with a food donation for the local food shelf Info: 612-370-4960
July 11
Art at St. Kate’s →→This juried outdoor art fair, featuring 100 artists of fine crafts and fine art, is produced by Artists’ Circle, a nonprofit Minnesota arts organization, and Textile Center, a national center for fiber arts in Minneapolis. When: 10 a.m.–5 p.m. July 11 Where: University of St. Catherine, Randolph and Cleveland avenues, St. Paul Cost: FREE admission and parking Info: artistscircle.org
Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 37
Can’t-Miss Calendar July 11 and Aug. 1
History Architecture Crawls: Mid-Century Modern →→Explore hallmarks of mid-century modern designs by Ralph Rapson, Close Architects, Eliel Saarinen and more. The tour is on an air-conditioned bus and includes up to two blocks of moderately paced walking on uneven surfaces. Call ahead to make arrangements for guests with limited mobility. When: 9 a.m.–noon July 11 and Aug. 1 Where: Minnesota History Center, St. Paul Cost: $25; reservations are required. Info: minnesotahistorycenter.org/ crawls or 651-259-3015
July 15 July 24
Anthony Bourdain: Close to the Bone
→→The renowned chef, author and Emmy-winning TV host presents an evening of candid stories about his life’s work and travels, featuring his brutally honest views on diverse cultures, street cuisine and lesser-known destinations around the world, followed by a question-and-answer session. When: 8 p.m. July 24 Where: State Theatre, Minneapolis Cost: $60–$75 Info: hennepintheatretrust.org or 800-982-2787
July 11
The Artery Experiment →→Test out the proposed design of the Artery — the planned connection between the downtown Hopkins LRT station and Mainstreet — at a family-friendly event, featuring live music and dance performances; food; roving artists; an art swap; free bike loaners to test out a protected bikeway; water play; free bike tune-ups; and arts and crafts for kids. When: 11 a.m.–4 p.m. July 11 Where: Eighth Avenue in downtown Hopkins Cost: FREE Info: hopkinsmn.com/events/artery
July 11-21
The Daughter of the Regiment →→Mill City Summer Opera returns for its fourth season in the museum’s dramatic Ruin Courtyard with Gaetano Donizetti’s brilliant, two-act comedy. When: 8–10:30 p.m. July 11, 13, 15, 17, 19 and 21 Where: Mill City Museum, Minneapolis Cost: $35-$195; reservations are required. Info: millcitysummeropera.org. 38 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
Taste & Toast →→This annual Minnesota Landscape Arboretum fund-raiser features tastes from top local restaurants and sips from regional wineries and breweries in the outdoor gardens of the arboretum. New this year is a pre-party talk with Chef Gavin Kaysen of the acclaimed James Beard-nominated Spoon & Stable restaurant. All proceeds will benefit the arboretum. When: 6–9 p.m. July 15 Where: Minnesota Landscape Arboretum, Chaska Cost: $75–$125 Info: arboretum.umn.edu and 612-625-9875
July 17–19
Street Machine Nationals →→More than 7,000 cars and 50,000plus fans are expected at this summer car show, one of the largest of its kind in the U.S., featuring high-horsepower, high-performance muscle cars, protouring cars and street machines from across the country. When: July 17–19 Where: Minnesota State Fairgrounds, St. Paul Cost: $15; advance discount tickets are available for $13 at area O’Reilly Auto Parts stores. Children age 10 and younger will be admitted for free with a paid adult. Info: streetmachinenationals.net
Booth Manor Residence
July 18
For Seniors 62+
Boz Scaggs
• 1 Bedrooms • Based on Income • Utilities Included • Service Coordinator • Resident Activities & Programs • Community Room • Smoke-Free Building
→→The Grammy Award-winning vocalist, guitarist and songwriter will perform an evening of hits such as Lowdown and Lido Shuffle, plus cuts from his new studio album, A Fool to Care. When: 8 p.m. July 18 Where: State Theatre, Minneapolis Cost: $56.50–$66.50 Info: hennepintheatretrust.org or 800-982-2787
July 18
1421 Yale Place, Mpls
612-338-6313
July 20
To Kill a Mockingbird →→Celebrate the July publication of Harper Lee’s new novel Go Set a Watchman, with a rare 35mm screening of this film, based on Lee’s book, with Gregory Peck in his Oscar-winning role as Atticus Finch. Moon Palace Books will sell copies of both novels in the lobby. When: 7:30 p.m. July 20 Where: Heights Theater, Columbia Heights Cost: $8 Info: heightstheater.com
→→Staff and fellowship students with Madeline Island Music Camp will present works by Schubert, Schumann, Rachmaninoff and Brahms as part of a 30th-anniversary tour.
• “As-Is” Sale • My Best Price 1st • Local Buyer • Fast, Friendly Service • 15 Years Buying Experience • References Available For more information
call Eric at 612-801-3202 Broker
11/26/14 3:36 PM
WheelFunRentalsmn.com
Bike Rentals
| Como Lake: 651-487-8046 Minnehaha Falls: 612-729-2660 | Lake Nokomis: 612-729-1127 Duluth – Canal Park: 218-722-1180 | Lake Phalen: 651-776-0005
Water Rentals
| Como Lake: 651-487-8046 Lake Calhoun: 612-823-5765 | Lake Nokomis: 612-729-1127 Lake Harriet: 612-922-9226 | Lake Phalen: 651-776-0005 Wheel Fun Rentals GA 0615 H4.indd 1
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Where adults 50+ can interact, relax and be inspired. Skyway Senior Center 950 Nicollet Mall Suite 290 (Target/Retek Building)
July 21
An Evening With the Romantics
• Any Condition — I Love Repairs
12/6/13 10:14 Sensible AM Investments GA 0115 12.indd 1
→→This 32nd-annual event celebrates the best and brightest of Minnesota’s African-American stories, achievements and culture with a parade, a 5K, a dance-team competition, live music, poetry, food and other family-friendly events. When: July 18 Where: Dale Street and Concordia Avenue, St. Paul Cost: FREE Info: rondoavenueinc.org
• Cash Paid For Your Home
SURREYS, CRUISERS, KAYAKS, CANOES & MORE!
Booth Manor GA 0114 12.indd 1
Rondo Days
I BUY HOUSES
Come and check out the contemporary center in the heart of downtown Minneapolis.
When: 7:30 p.m. July 21 Where: Orchestra Hall, Target Atrium, Minneapolis Cost: $30 ($75 for dinner and concert) Info: minnesotaorchestra.org or 612-371-5600
Call 612.370.3869 to get the free newsletter
Monday-Friday 9am-3pm
UCare Skyway Senior Center GA 2013 Filler H4.indd 1
7/22/13 9:40/AM Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 39
Brain teasers Sudoku
Word Search LIVE TO LOVE Care Compassion Dependent Disability Empathy Fulfilling Handicap
Cryptogram
Health Identifying Illness Kind Needs Nurse Prevention
Provider Responsibility Seniors Stress Therapy Treatment Trusting
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1. 65 million (AARP Caregiving in the U.S. 2009 report) 2. Robot & Frank 3. Still Alice TRIVIA
Answers 40 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
The best gift you can give a child isn’t found in a toy store.
SPONSORED BY MINNESOTA COLLEGE SAVINGS PLAN
Trivia CAREGIVING 1. What do you think is the estimated number of family caregivers in the United States? (It’s in the millions.) 2. In what 2012 comedy film does the protagonist instruct his futuristic robot caregiver to go on a crime spree with him? 3. What 2014 American drama film reminds us that Alzheimer’s disease can strike in your 50s?
If I do something caring for a friend, I have no doubt in my mind they would do it for me. CRYTPOGRAM SUDOKU Caring, Coping, Giving
WORD SCRAMBLE
You can get there. We can help. Visit www.MN529today.com or call Chris McLeod 952-830-3127 Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 41
CROSSWORD
Answers
Crossword
ACROSS 1 Cowboys, on scoreboards 4 Some field hands 15 N.Y. campus that’s home to the Engineers 16 Graphic with three-digit numbers 17 Msg. after an escape, perhaps 18 40-member California group 19 Overweight 21 Surprise fictional visitors 22 Mother of Sam and Charlie Woods 23 A bit sour 24 Law order 25 Suffix with poly26 Adorable 27 Hearty pastry 29 Patient of Dr. Liz 30 Ready to roll 31 Org. with a Retirement Estimator web page 34 Eye 42 / July 2015 / Minnesota Good Age
SPONSORED BY MINNESOTA COLLEGE SAVINGS PLAN
36 Put in order 38 Furlong’s 220: Abbr. 39 Hikes 43 Time to give up 44 Acts by those who won’t give up 45 Slalom opening 46 Child: Pref. 49 7, often 50 Trap 51 Switch attachment? 52 World Cup chant 53 Connecticut town in which some “Stepford Wives” scenes were filmed 54 Spotted cat 57 Bio subject 58 1950 Muddy Waters song 59 Calendar abbr. 60 Brand of protective clothing 61 Seventh-largest st.
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Minnesota Good Age / July 2015 / 43
Cremation Society of Minnesota
ABOUT CREMATION Q. How does the Cremation Society of Minnesota work? A. The Cremation Society is notified immediately
at the time of death. The member’s body is taken to the Society’s crematory. It is held until proper medical authorization and a cremation permit is secured. It is then cremated.
Q. What happens to the ashes after cremation? A. The member’s remains are handled according to their written instructions. They may be picked up by survivors or delivered for a fee.
Q. What is the cost for cremation? A. “Our current cost for our basic direct cremation service is $1,595.00.” It includes removal of the body from the place of death, cremation, filing of necessary papers, and a cardboard container suitable for burial. The charge for non-members, who we also serve, is more.
Q. How do I become a member? A. Fill out the registration form and mail it to our
near-est location. Enclose a one-time membership fee of $15.00 per person. The fee covers setting up and maintaining records. It is not refundable nor an offset to final service costs. We will register you and send you a wallet-sized membership card, and a certificate of registration.
Q. What are the benefits of prepaying for services? A. Prepayment provides two benefits – it removes a
stress from survivors and guarantees that services will be performed at today’s cost.
Q. Where can I learn more? A. You may call or visit any one of our locations, or
visit us at cremationsocietyofmn.com or email us at csminnesota@aol.com
REGISTRATION FORM
Name Address Telephone (
)
INFORMATION REQUIRED ON THE DEATH CERTIFICATE Date of Birth
(will remain confidential)
Place of Birth
Sex ❏ M ❏ F
Race
Hispanic ❏ Yes ❏ No
Father’s Name
Social Security #
Mother’s Name
Marital Status ❏ Married ❏ Never Married ❏ Widowed ❏ Divorced If married, spouse’s full legal name, including maiden Are you a Veteran? ❏ Yes ❏ No
If Yes, enclose a copy of your discharge paper.
AUTHORIZATION FOR CREMATION I, the undersigned, authorize and request the Cremation Society of Minnesota or its assigns to cremate the remains of , and further authorize and request that the following disposition of the cremated remains be made: . I will indemnify and hold harmless the Cremation Society of Minnesota and the crematory from any claims to the contrary including all liability and claims related to the shipment and storage of the cremated remains. Signature
Date
Witness Signature
Date
Address Telephone (
)
Email address
NEXT OF KIN – Please list at least one. Name
Relationship
Address Telephone (
)
PAYMENT PLAN – You are not a member until this form is on file and your registration fee is received. “Our current cost for our basic direct cremation service is $1,595.00.” ❏ I wish to preregister with the Cremation Society of Minnesota
Registration Fee:
❏ I wish to prepay for my Basic Cremation, I understand my pre-payment will be placed in an insurance policy to be used at time of death ❏ I wish to register at this time but not prepay
$15.00 $
Total Paid: $ GA 07/15
PLEASE MAIL FORM TO THE NEAREST CHAPEL LISTED BELOW
Complete Cremation Services PROFESSIONAL · DIGNIFIED · ECONOMICAL
CremationSocietyOfMN.com