The Daily Splendour - Issue 11

THE ULTIMATE FESTIVAL EXPERIENCE SLIDE IN TO TUNES, GOOD TIMES & EVEN BETTER VIBES

F I N D U S N E A R T H E M I X U P S TA G E !

Welcome to Sunday and the rest of your life!

Think about it, man, right now is the beginning of the rest of your life! What are you gonna do with it? First, you should keep reading this final issue of The Daily Splendour, then you should get out there and see some bands and stuff, then eat some stuff, drink some water, and then hug someone who looks like they could use a hug. Most everyone needs a hug at any given moment, so give them a hug. And if that hug develops into something a little more intimate like, say, a smooch, so be it.

Just go with the flow. Who knows, that smooch might lead to love, marriage and starting a family, and maybe your first child will grow up to be the person who finds a cure for eczema. It could happen. Anything can happen when you hug a stranger.

You were expecting a crude joke about handshandies or something, weren’t you. Well, none of that today. We’re feeling too groovy (cooked).

Have a far-out final day of Splendour, baby.

Intro

SUNDAY 21ST JULY SET TIMES Amphitheatre Pist Idiots 12.00 – 12.45 Slowly Slowly 1.00 – 1.45 The Beths 2.15 – 3.00 Last Dinosaurs 3.30 – 4.15 The Rubens 4.45 – 5.45 Matt Corby 6.15 – 7.15 James Blake 7.45 – 8.45 SZA 9.15 – 10.15 Hilltop Hoods 10.45 – 12.00

Mix Up Spacey Jane 12.15 – 1.00 Lex Deluxe 1.00 – 1.30 Kian 1.30 – 2.15 Lex Deluxe 2.45 – 3.30 Honne 2.45 – 3.30 Close Encounters (DJ Set) 3.30 – 4.00 Mallrat 4.00 – 4.45 Close Encounters (DJ Set) 4.45 – 5.15 Mansionair 5.15 – 6.15 Close Encounters (DJ Set) 6.15 – 7.00 Tycho 7.00 – 8.00 Ninajirachi 8.00 – 8.45 Cosmo’s Midnight 8.45 – 9.45 Ninajirachi 9.45 – 10.30 What So Not 10.30 – 11.30

Sunday. We made it. You made it, more importantly. And you’re doing a fantastic job reading a newspaper. I’m assuming people are reading this? Text me, I wanna know. 0413 582 290. I’m going to tenderly thrust you into the last day of SITG for 2019. It’ll be somewhat gentle, but you’ve got two days’ experience, so I won’t be too kind.

First off, I recommend you blow the dirt and onions from last night’s kebab out of your ears with our good pals the Pist Idiots. Follow that up with the dreamboats from Erthlings (they’re young up and comers, support them!), then wander back to the Amphitheatre and take in Slowly Slowly. Today sidesteps in and out of genres, which is the beauty of a music festival. You can walk, skip or run to any number of different worlds in only minutes. Keen to dance? Same. Lex Deluxe and Honne will wash away the nagging fact that this is the last day of SITG. We’re changing gears next, because today is a manual transmission being abused by an amateur driver (I know nothing about cars). Last Dinosaurs and Psychedelic Porn Crumpets bring us to a crossroads, or a hook turn. The next choice is yours: Matt Corby, Mansionair, or Local Natives. All good options, all mood dependent.

We’re now ready for the last five hours of Splendour in the Grass.

We’re suckers for James Blake, so that’s our destination. There aren’t many acts left, so follow me or good riddance and good luck. A bolt to Cosmo’s Midnight is next on the menu, before we finish off at the Amphitheatre. Come for SZA and stay for everyone else! We know you’re sad about Chance, but Splendour only comes once a year baby, so soak it up because it’s been a really fucking fantastic ride. We love you. Goodnight!

Mast head MAST

GW McLennan Erthlings 12.30 – 1.15 Phony Ppl 1.45 – 2.30 Charly Bliss 3.00 – 3.45 Psychedelic Porn Crumpets 4.15 – 5.00 Local Natives 5.30 – 6.30 The Teskey Brothers 7.00 – 8.00 Ziggy Alberts 8.30 – 9.30 The Lumineers 10.00 – 11.00 Tiny Dancer Wax’O Paradiso 4.30 – 6.30 Telephones 6.30 – 8.00 DJ JNETT 8.00 – 10.00 Kyle Hall 10.00 – 12.00 Mike Servito 12.00 – 2.00

MANAGING EDITOR MONIQUE PENNING EDITOR IN CHIEF JASON CROMBIE PUBLISHERS CHRIS SEARL & CAMPBELL MILLIGAN CREATIVE DIRECTOR CAMPBELL MILLIGAN CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER RACHEL BLACKLEY BRAND PARTNERSHIPS DIRECTOR DALE ROBINSON SALES AND MARKETING ANDREW SPENCE ART DIRECTOR MATT PIKE ACCOUNTS GEORGIA SHENTON DIGITAL CONTENT MANAGER TOM COLE

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS JASON CROMBIE, ERIN BROMHEAD, VAUGHAN DEAD, NOLAN GAWRON, MONIQUE PENNING, BRUNO COWEN, DOUGIE THE PIZZA BOY, NAT KASSEL, HOT WHEELS, SDS CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS JAMES ADAMS, TOM COLE, MIA MALA MCDONALD, ZAIN AYUB, ASHI ARIZONA, ANDY DELUCA,

CONTACT

MONSTER CHILDREN SYDNEY OFFICE 6 AUSTRALIA STREET, CAMPERDOWN NSW, 2050, AUSTRALIA PH: +61 2 9517 2568 WWW.MONSTERCHILDREN.COM THE DAILY SPLENDOUR IS PUBLISHED THREE TIMES A FESTIVAL BY MONSTER CHILDREN PTY LTD IN ASSOCIATION WITH SPLENDOUR IN THE GRASS DISTRIBUTED BY MONSTER CHILDREN ANY SUGGESTIONS, COMPLAINTS OR IDEAS SHOULD BE SENT TO MONSTER@MONSTERCHILDREN.COM THIS IS THE 11TH ISSUE OF THE DAILY SPLENDOUR. CONTENT IS COPYRIGHT MONSTER CHILDREN PTY LTD, UNLESS OTHERWISE INDICATED FOLLOW US ON THE INTERWEBS WWW.MONSTERCHILDREN.COM INSTAGRAM @MONSTERCHILDREN WWW.ISSUU.COM/MONSTERCHILDRENMAGAZINE

Built for the Long Haul.

The Landlock nixon.com

Contents 3. LETTER FROM THE ED 4. MC’S ROADMAP 6. CONTENTS (YOU’RE LOOKING AT IT, DUMMY) 8. THE LUMINEERS 10. VIP VILLAGE 12. RUBY FIELDS VS. PIST IDIOTS 14. BEST TOUR RIDER EVER 16. PSYCHEDELIC PORN CRUMPETS 18. LEE MCCONNELL 22. THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY 23. UNFAVOURITE MOMENTS WITH JESS DUCROU 24. FESTIVAL PHOTOS 34. THE BETHS 35. BUNDJALUNG NATIVE TITLE 36. SPLEXIT 38. CROSSWORDS 39. CLASSIFIEDS

3.

LETTER FROM THE ED

4.

MC’S ROADMAP

6.

CONTENTS (YOU’RE LOOKING AT IT, DUMMY) 8.

THE LUMINEERS

10.

VIP VILLAGE

12.

IDIOTS

RUBY FIELDS VS. PIST

14.

BEST TOUR RIDER EVER

16.

PETS

PSYCHEDELIC PORN CRUM-

18.

LEE MCCONNELL

22.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

23.

UNFAVOURITE MOMENTS WITH JESS DUCROU 24.

FESTIVAL PHOTOS

34.

THE BETHS

35.

BUNDJALUNG NATIVE TITLE

36.

SPLEXIT

38.

CROSSWORDS

39.

CLASSIFIEDS

Lum PROVIDING THE SOUNDTRACK TO YOUR DRIVE HOME FROM SPLENDOUR

IT’S HARD TO BELIEVE THAT NEARLY A DECADE HAS PASSED SINCE THE AMERICAN FOLK REVIVAL

OVER TOOK POPULAR MUSIC, AND YET IT’S EQUALLY BAFFLING THAT MY CHIHUAHUA SMOKEY LOPEZ CAN DANCE AROUND ON HER HIND LEGS FOR OVER A MINUTE, SHOULD I HOLD A PIECE OF BARBECUED CHICKEN JUST ABOVE HER NOSE.

NO DOUBT THIS WORLD IS A STRANGE JOINT, HOWEVER, ONE TRUTH THAT CAN BE EASILY EXPLAINED IS THE

ONGOING SUCCESS OF THE LUMINEERS, A BAND THAT RODE THE CREST OF THAT INITIAL A-FOLK WAVE WITH SONGS LIKE ‘HO HEY’ AND ‘STUBBORN LOVE’, BUT HAVE SINCE GONE ON TO CRAFT A SOUND AND LIVE SHOW THAT IS WHOLLY THEIR OWN, ONE THAT WILL SIGN OFF SPLENDOUR 2019 WITH A BLISS-FUELLED SET OF SOUL AND SINGALONGS IN THE GW MCLENNAN

.

TENT SUNDAY EVENING. WE SPOKE WITH JEREMIAH, AKA JEZZA, TO SEE WHAT’S COOKING.

INTERVIEW BY VAUGHAN DEAD

tween eight and sixteen hours to the

next show. But then, in the early days of touring you have so much camaraderie,

and I think you miss that closeness of sitting in the van, getting some coffee Hello Jeremiah, how are you today?

Good. How are you doing?

going, throwing on an album, talking the whole way, taking in the landscape as it

flies past the window… I think you end

I’m good mate. I just went fishing with up appreciating the moment and the the kids and we reeled in three toad- journey and the places so much more ies, or puffer fish as they’re also known. than when you just fly straight in. So, They were undersize so we threw them there are aspects of that time I rememback, but it was fun.

That’s awesome.

Lum

in the car after a show and driving be-

ber fondly for sure.

You guys are playing Splendour on

So, here’s a strange fact. I was intro- Sunday which is a blitzed and blissed duced to your music by three-time world out day to headline. My view has alsurfing champion and shark-bashing ways been it’s the best day to play Aussie hero Mick Fanning when we because everyone has had their heat-

were on three-week road trip through er night, they’ve come good but they the desert last year. Were you aware he don’t want to know about getting was a fan?

back to real life for at least another

Mick actually came to one of our shows twelve hours. What will you guys be in Australia, and I was the only guy in the bringing to their final experience of band who didn’t get to meet him. I think the fezzy?

I went back to the hotel, but the rest of Actually, we’ve been playing a lot of festhe band went out with him afterwards tivals where we’re the last band on the and they had a good time. But, I think last day, and it’d be easy to think, ‘Aaah

our music serves well on the road; it’s man, everyone’s gonna be exhausted good road trip material, because I don’t and burnt out,’ but the thing is, festival

think our music is all that immediate, shows are always different to your own like, ‘Let’s check out this banger song.’ live headlining gig. People are there for

I think it’s better for driving around and an experience so much bigger than just seeing one band, so we bring a set list having on in the background.

Oh man, road trip music goes hand and an attitude that reflects that. We’re in hand with some of the best and gonna play our best set and try to bring

most liberating times of your life, es- a Lumineers experience that caters to pecially when you’re young and you what we do in our normal shows, but get your first car and you just hit the also step it up so that it matches the highway. What are your memories of emotion of that environment. It’ll be formative road trip albums?

special because we know how to play a

It wasn’t until we started touring with the festival crowd now. Years ago, we came band and we had fourteen-hour drives to Australia for Big Day Out and they between shows that the road trip be- wanted us to play an hour-long set, but came a place of music for us. America our album was only thirty-five-minutes is so huge and we did a lot of our own long (laughs) so we were pulling rabbits driving, and one of the bands we al- out of the hat for that one. We’ve come

ways loved listening to was Bright Eyes, a long way since then. In saying that, the Conor Oberst, particularly his amazing biggest mistake you can make is going

album I’m Wide Awake, It’s Morning. I out there and trying to be someone that swear it’s gotta be one of the best road you’re not; we’ll just bring our best show trip albums ever made. It’s a killer album into the feel of the people and the surroundings on the day. Obviously, we’re for the road.

Are those early memories of the road not Australian, but we’ve put a lot of time and energy into coming down that as a young band fond ones?

I think slight memory loss combined way, and we feel a connection with the with romanticising the past makes those people that is unlike anywhere else, and times better than they were (laughs). I think they feel it with us too. I think it’ll You don’t miss the big drives–they were be a great time. brutal, especially if you were playing Catch The Lumineers tonight at 10pm at somewhere one night, jumping straight GW McLennan.

INTERVIEW BY VAUGHAN DEAD

PHOTOS BY THE JAMES ADAMS

Oooooft. You been to Splendour’s VIP Village yet? Well, today’s your

chargers, concierge, and plenty of nice spots to take a load off. If you’re

last chance. Being out in the paddocks is fun as shit, but so is taking

not convinced yet, just take a look at these photos. What more could you

a breather with some of the finer things in life—an exclusive Icebergs

possibly want?

cocktail bar, mouth-watering food from Mary’s Pizzeria, drink on arrival,

Head to www.splendourinthegrass.com/vip-village to schmooze up your

toilets that aren’t port-a-loos (they’re actually really fancy), phone

Splendour experience.

SPLENDOUR VIP VILLAGE

@maryspizzeria

MARY'S. MADE UP MAKING OUT. NEWTOWN 6 Mary St Newtown @marysgetfat

CBD 154 Castlereagh St Sydney @marysgetfat

CIRCULAR QUAY 7 Macquarie Pl Circular Quay @marysgetfat

PIZZERIA 2 City Rd Chippendale @maryspizzeria

UNDERGROUND 29 Reiby Place Circular Quay @marysunderground

WOLF ALICE ADMITTED TO KEEPING THEIR MERCURY PRIZE ON A SHELF AT THE LOCAL PUB, SANTIGOLD TOLD US HER FATE WAS SEALED BY A PSYCHIC, AND KEVIN PARKER TOLD US LITERALLY NOTHING ABOUT THE NEXT TAME ALBUM. THAT’S HARD-HITTING JOURNALISM. THANKS, DAILY SPLENDOUR. BUT WHAT DO MUSICIANS TALK ABOUT WHEN US JOURNALISTS AREN’T AROUND, WAITING FOR SOUNDBITES, CATCHY HEADLINES AND SALACIOUS QUOTES? DO THEY DISCUSS PET RATS, NIPPLE TASSELS AND WEARING JOHN LENNON’S SKIN? YOU BET YOUR SWEET, SUGARY ASS THEY DO. WE ASKED RUBY FIELDS AND PIST IDIOTS FRONTMAN, JACK SNIFF, TO INTERVIEW EACH OTHER, AND HERE’S WHAT THEY SAID.

Jack Sniff: What are you doing?

RF: Fallen prey to the

system of mediocrity?

Ruby Fields: Just making JS: Oh no. Maybe. I don’t dinner in-between prac-

know what mediocrity

JS: Cool. How do you

well...

ticing.

feeling about doing an ad-hoc interview right now?

RF: Ah, fuck.

JS: How’s this for a

question: what’s for dinner?

means. But mediocre, RF: That’s exactly what

it means. Sniff, what are

you planning on wearing during your set?

JS: Nothing at all. Nah, you know me: shorts, t-shirt…

RF: Ok, so I made scones RF: Is there potential that just before, and that was

the t-shirt will come off?

made chilli and I’m put-

statement.

afternoon tea. Now I’ve ting it in ramekins, and I’m cracking an egg in

it to bake it in the oven, with a side of haloumi and sweet potato.

JS: Sounds intense.

RF: Well yeah,

JS: Halfway. I’ll make a

RF: It’s going to get pret-

ty hot, I mean, you are on at the Amphitheatre.

JS: Yeah, it’s pretty hot in Byron Bay.

RF: Yeah, you know Pat, my drummer, lived there

you know, I’ve for about three days. got it all

JS: Did he?

JS: And

of a local that he would

poppin’.

what did you

have for break-

fast and how’s your

rat going?

RF: For breakky I didn’t

really have anything,

I just cracked into practice. But my rat is

going

good;

he’s cur-

rently with Tas

[bass player for

Ruby Fields], who’s currently looking at his fire, really proud.

JS: Has he been building fires?

RF: Yeah, he was enough cross the road without looking both ways.

JS: Oh god, that’s beautiful.

RF: I even heard he be-

came friends with Chris

Hemsworth up there, too.

JS: So pretty much ev-

eryone else in your band is just a whole bunch of lover boys.

RF: Yeah, exactly. And

we’ve got Tarz, who has

an identity crisis with his moustache.

JS: Ah, been there,

know what you’re talking about.

RF: Yeah, he’s like, ‘Do

RF: Yeah he’s been build- I keep it? Do I not? Do ing piles of firewood with

I get a beard? Do I look

JS: God he’s hot.

never know.

his manly chainsaw.

RF: I’m seriously just

looking at him through the kitchen doors and

he’s smiling at his own

fire. Is this the interview?

What did you have for dinner tonight, Sniff?

JS: Small chicken katsu

roll. That was lunch and breakfast. Maybe some chips for dinner.

RF: What do you think

your Splendour performance will bring to the

table that no one else’s will?

like a sex offender?’ You JS: Anyway, Rubes,

what’s your plans for Splendour?

RF: I’m gonna get there

and I’m gonna do it. Then I’m gonna leave and

I’m gonna get my mum to pick me up from the airport.

JS: Are you going to bring your rat?

RF: Fuck that. Can you imagine?

JS: Rats on a plane.

RF: What pet would you get if you could get a

JS: Fuck. We’re a consis- pet? tent machine Ruby and we’ve…

JS: Maybe a goldfish.

RF: Tas wants fish, but I

honestly don’t get it. He

JS: Love it also.

think it’s cool if I have a

can’t even scratch my

says that ‘chicks would

RF: Ok, there you go. I

fish tank in my room.’ But brain anymore. Would I can guarantee you right

you rather have a finger

the case.

for fingers?

now, Tas, that that is not JS: If you were to wear

someone else’s skin as

your own, whose would it be?

RF: Um, well, if I were

to wear… maybe Girg’s

[Ruby and the Pist Idiots manager]. Bit of automatic sun protection,

might be referred to as a golden Egyptian.

JS: Obviously you’ll keep

for a penis, or penises

JS: Penises for fingers.

RF: Really? Everyone can see them.

JS: Yeah. Can you imagine the pleasure?

RF: I mean yeah, if one

got tired you’d had nine more of them.

JS: That’s right, it’s incredible.

RF: But wait, think

about this though—you

that beautiful head of hair wouldn’t be able to pick of yours.

anything up with them

kgs off the gut as well,

floppy, or com-

RF: I might keep a few

because they’re either

but we’ll keep that be-

pletely hard.

why have a six pack

would

tween us. C’mon man, when you can have the whole keg?

JS: His melanin levels

would be incredible. I’m

JS: Alright, you

rather

have nipples where your

just thinking about it now, eyes were, or eyes and I think I might be

where your nipples

RF: Right, ok.

RF: I’d have them

John Lennon.

JS: John Lennon’s skin would be nice.

RF: If you could create a World of Warcraft char-

acter profile, what would your name be?

JS: Shneelius the Conqueror.

RF: That’s what you’re going with?

JS: No, that’s not what I’m going with.

RF: I love the insecurity that I just set into you

by asking if that’s what you’re going with.

JS: How about…

Daenerys Longbottom.

RF: Is that like a fan

fiction between Khaleesi and Neville?

JS: That is exactly right.

RF: Ok, I like that. I think mine would be, like,

Swag Killer Dawg or something. A-W-G.

JS: Very criminalistic.

RF: What do you think

about chicks that wear

nipple tassels to Splendour?

JS: Love it.

RF: Cool. What do you think about men that

wear nipple tassels to Splendour?

were?

where my nipples are so I can say, ‘Eyes down here,

mate.’

JS: That’s very good.

RF: Thank you.

JS: Who would you karate kick in the head?

RF: Oh. Probably Dean Lewis because we’re clashing set times.

JS: Have you got any

tricks you’re going to pull on the people for your Splendour show?

RF: Well, let me just say that before we walk on

stage, we’re not using a

song, but something else

to get the people excited.

JS: Ooooh. An orchestra?

RF: You’re not allowed to guess.

JS: Fireworks?

RF: You’re not allowed to guess.

JS: Alright, beautiful.

Thank you, Ruby. I think we should congratulate

ourselves on this. We did well.

RF: Ok, bye.

TOUR

RIDER

WHEN YOU REACH A CERTAIN LEVEL OF FAMOUS, YOU CAN ASK FOR WHATEVER YOU WANT AND SOMEONE WILL GO GET IT FOR YOU. THERE IS NO BETTER EXAMPLE OF THIS THAN A PERFORMER’S TOUR RIDER. TAKE, FOR EX AMPLE, VAN HALEN’S 1982 TOUR DEMANDS, WHEN THEY INFAMOUSLY REQUESTED A BOWL OF M&M’S WITH ALL THE ‘BROWN ONES’ REMOVED. ANOTHER FINE EX AMPLE IS DEADMAU5’S REQUEST OF ‘1 LARGE INFLATABLE ANIMAL, INFLATED AND AT LEAST 5’ TALL’ IN A RIDER THAT WAS LEAKED. SLAYER TOO MADE SOME PRETTY AWESOME REQUESTS ON THEIR 2011 FUN FUN FEST RIDER, WHEN THEY ASKED FOR ‘100 SNOW-WHITE GOATS FOR SLAUGHTER’, AND A HUMMUS AND SPROUTS PLATTER ‘IN PENTAGRAM FORM’. BUT THE BEST RIDER OF ALL IS IGGY POP’S, WHICH HE WROTE HIMSELF AND IS AS HILARIOUS AS IT IS DETAILED. IGGY RELEASED THE ’06 RIDER HIMSELF VIA HIS WEBSITE, AND IT’S DIVIDED INTO SEVEN DIFFERENT PARTS, OR EIGHT, IF YOU COUNT THE FINAL PAGE WHICH IS A PITCH FOR A REALITY TV SHOW CALLED DEAD DOG ISLAND. HERE’S THE BEST TWO PAGES, FOLLOWED, OF COURSE, BY THE PITCH, WHICH I CAN’T BELIEVE HASN’T BEEN PICKED UP BY NOW. ENJOY.

WORDS BY ERIN BROMHEAD

Dressing Room One for Iggy Pop You know what would be really nice? If you could make this room look less like a typical rock & roll dressing room and more sort of…. interesting? Are you with me?

Just let someone loose with a little bit of artistic flair… Er, do you know any homosexuals? And am I allowed to say that? Probably not.

It should contain:

• A kettle or water heating device of some description.

• And some Chinese gunpowder tea. So we can attempt to blow up the dressing room. That’s a joke by the way. Good thing this isn’t an airport…

• Some fresh ginger, honey, lemons, and a sharp knife. So we can make ginger, honey and lemon tea. God knows why.

• An English language newspaper like the New York Times or the Miami Herald. Or the Guardian (my personal favourite).

• Or a copy of USA Today that’s got a story about morbidly obese people in it. Most amusing!

• Somebody dressed as Bob Hope doing fantastic Bob Hope impersonations and telling all those hilarious Bob Hope jokes about golf and Hollywood and Bing

OR

Crosby. Oh God, I wish I’d been alive in those days, so that Bob Hope could have come and entertained me in some World War 2 hell-hole before I went off and got shot. What joy they must have experienced…

• Seven dwarves, dressed up as those dwarves out of that marvellous Walt Disney film about the woman who goes to sleep for a hundred years after

biting a poisoned dwarf, or maybe after pricking her finger on a rather sharp apple… or something. What was the name of that film? Was it Cinderella? Taller people are acceptable, of course. It’s attitude, more than height, that’s important here. Don’t forget the pointy hats!

• A big bucket of ice, or a refrigerator, containing:

• 6 bottles of Grolsch or decent local beer.

• 2 litres good quality still mineral water. I think it should originate in the country we are in.

• 10 16oz plastic cups and 4 glass wine glasses • a corkscrew to open wine bottles

• 2 bottles of smooth, full-bodied, Bordeaux-type red wine. Probably French. And something we’ve heard of, but still can’t pronounce. Look, there’s fucking

loads of good red wines. Ask the man in the wine shop. Or here’s a number of suggestions:

2nd choice – a Barolo or Barbaresco ’89 or ’90

1st choice – a Medoc, St. Emilion, Pomerol, or Pauillac, years ’86, ’89, ’90

• 4 large, clean towels. See? Not all that bad, is it?

Dressing Room Two for The Stooges

• 3 cases x 12oz bottles of still mineral water. Good quality. Doesn’t have to be French, though.

• 1 x case of big bottles of good, premium beer. You decide. But remember, I might ask you to taste a bottle, so buy something nice!! Here’s a clue – it’s

• 3 large bottles of good quality sparkling water. Again, un-French is good. Unless we are in France, in which case – What a marvellous country.

probably won’t start with a letter “B” and end with “udweiser”.

• 6 cans of Red Bull or similar. Something with testicles in it. Or testicles lite.

• 6 bottles of alcohol-free beer. The saxophonist likes to mix it with his whisky. And vodka. And other beer, probably. Is that classed as having a bit of a drink

problem, having to pretend to be drinking, even when you aren’t?

however, says it’s piss. And he could give the saxophonist a run for his money, not to mention alcohol. No accounting for taste, though, so a bottle of Ketel

Spunk, which tastes of liquorice!! How we laughed. It’s not alcohol-free though. Charm free, yes…

coke, and having my tongue ripped out and placed inside my own colon, I’d probably be licking my own arse right now…

• A bottle of vodka decent stuff, please. Not made in bloody England. Some people seem to enjoy that Ketel One vodka from Holland. Our sound man,

One, or failing that, Grey Goose. (Down in one, so to speak, haha). I don’t know – do they make alcohol free vodka? In Denmark they have one called

• 1 case of coke in cans. Well I think it’s disgusting stuff. Like McDonalds predigested sandwiches. Do you know, if I had to choose between a McDonalds with

• 1 case of cans of assorted sodas. Ginger beer? Dandelion & burdock? I don’t know. Lemonade?

• 2 x 48oz bottles of Ocean Spray cranberry juice. (48 oz is American for ‘large”). But no blends please. No orange and cranberry, or cranberry and turkey.

Cranberry with even more cranberry is ok.

• 1 x 48 oz bottles of Tropicana orange juice.

• Some Kettle Chips or chips artisanal or hand-made chips or…. Do you know what I mean? Real, old fashioned, proper potato chips. But from a different

kettle to the one they made the vodka in.

• Cauliflower & broccoli, cut into individual florets and thrown immediately into the garbage. I fucking hate that.

• Some crackers. And maybe some dips. Hummus and taramasalata. Today the world, taramasalata. Nuts. Assorted nibbly things.

• Nearly finished now. I think I could do with a rest. I’ve been on me feet all day. Really! Somebody stole all the chairs out of the office. Bastards.

• A bit of fresh bread, some corn chips, smoked fish, tinned sardines & tinned tuna.

• Lots & lots of clean ice. (Not ice that a polar bear has been standing on, with its big mucky feet. Polar bears are still bears, aren’t they? Not pigs, like the panda.

• And then lots more for after the show. Ice, that is. Forget about the panda.

• Plastic cups, assorted sizes, suitable for hot and cold drinks. At least one sleeve of 16oz solo, and some little ones. Does anyone outside the U.S. of A.

understand what this means? I don’t, and I wrote it.

• 18 large bath towels. Not face cloths. Towels. Nice and freshly laundered too.

• A copy of the New York Times. A recent copy, if possible. In fact, today’s would be nice.

Dead Dog Island By the way, if there are any reality TV executives reading this – hardly likely, I know, but – here is my idea for a reality TV show. It’s called Dead Dog Island, where a

group of contestants/dog lovers are asked what is their favourite breed of dog, then whatever they reply (for example, Poodle or Labrador) they are then presented with a dead dog of that particular breed, which they have to cook in a number of different ways, say about six or seven, and then eat it all up over the course of the next oooh… two weeks or so.

But just to make it a little more difficult and sort of gameshow-y, all the knives are blunt, and they have to wear a pair of those enormous clown trousers, made out of wood or something, so that they can’t quite reach anything. Well only just, anyway.

The first person to completely eat all his (or her) dog and not be thrown off the island by the public for being too pleasant, or maybe unpleasant, wins another live dog of exactly the same breed. And pots of money. And free dog food for life (of the dog).

IGGY IGGY IGGY IGGY IGGY IGGY

POP POP POP POP POP POP

TOUR TOUR TOUR TOUR TOUR TOUR

RIDER RIDER RIDER RIDER RIDER RIDER

PSYCHEDELIC PORN CRUMPETS ARE CRUSHING IT RIGHT NOW. THEIR NEW RECORD, AND NOW FOR THE WHATCHAMACALLIT, IS SITTING AT THE VERY TOP OF THE AUSTRALIAN VINYL CHARTS, AND FOR GOOD REASON. THEY SCRATCH AN ITCH IN AUSSIE MUSIC THAT STRIKES A RARE BALANCE BETWEEN IMMEDIACY AND COMPLEXITY—THE SHEER MOMENTUM OF THEIR RIFF-BASED PSYCH-ROCK NEARLY OUTRUNS ITS OWN ANXIOUS UNDERBELLY. AND YET, LEAD SINGER JACK MCEWAN IS ANYTHING BUT WORLD-WEARY. GLEEFULLY SIPPING A SCHOONER ON A MONDAY MORNING WITH THE REST OF HIS EXHAUSTED BAND BEHIND HIM, HE SEEMS AS STOKED AS A MAN COULD BE. WITH OCCASIONAL INTERJECTIONS FROM BRIGHTEYED KEYBOARD PLAYER CHRIS YOUNG, WE CHAT ABOUT ESCAPISM, HOW PERTH SHAPED THEIR MUSIC, AND THE WAY SONGWRITING FILLS THE VOID.

You guys get lumped in with Tropical Fuck Storm and King Gizzard and the

In your track ‘Gurzle’ there’s that line ‘Man, I need a job.’ Have you guys got

cial comparison?

Chris: I’d only just started learning all the songs to jump on as fifth member, and

Lizard Wizard a lot. Are you happy about that, or does it feel like a superfiJack: Being compared to them is perfect in the Australian scene, but more so

that classic cocktail of feeling guilty about playing music?

I had them going on the bus on my way to work. ‘Gurzle’ came on and I realised I

over in Europe and America where it’s helped out massively because it means was legitimately quitting my job next week to go on tour with the Crumpets. Hearwe’re among other great bands. I think when a scene happens—like Tame Impala,

King Gizzard and Pond—you tend to get bands that come along and emulate that

ing Jack going, ‘I’m fucked,’ made me go, ‘Well this is pretty apt, isn’t it?’

A lot of the lyrics in ‘Gurzle’ have anxiety in them…

kind of sound. But it seems in the psych-rock scene that it’s not just copying, it’s Jack: Yeah, about what’s coming, where you are. Well, music does fill that void, like, ‘let’s branch off in this direction, let’s branch off in that direction.’ Gizzard

that’s your release. It’s almost like a diary, here’s that point I was at in time. I al-

it’s not… You’ll compare it, but only because you’re like, ‘what else is happening

a barn when I wrote that song. I was working on a building site, not really knowing

moment, it’s easy to get put into that category.

in no way successful in our heads, but compared to where we were, I suppose

did that with Tame, and I feel like we’re doing our own separate thing enough that ways get that nostalgic feeling when I do listen back to it. Like wow, I was living in around that genre?’ And Australia is just pumping out so many good bands at the

what to do and just putting all my eggs into this band. And now to look back, we’re

Do you reckon something about Perth has rubbed off on you? Bands like we are doing well. And that’s why the lyrics are more fun and upbeat on the new Pond and The Drones have a similar surreal grandeur.

Jack: I think Australia’s always had a great presence in rock music, but Perth

record. We’re a bit more comfortable not working on a building site.

There’s a real obsession with over-analysis in your lyrics; have you found a

sort of honed in on it. Having smaller clubs and venues that were music-based, a remedy for that?

young crew like us would go out on a Friday or Saturday night knowing we were Jack: Recording more songs! I feel much more like myself when we’re recording

gonna see a good band. There wasn’t a lot of competition, so rather than getting an album. I’m kind of lost without a project. Porn Crumpets started purely as a

Radiohead in and having to compete with them, you’d go and watch the local procrastination piece from uni. It’s just an outlet. It’s terrifying to think now people bands. That’s how we all met, just playing together in local acts. In Perth, there

listen to it. Like, that definitely got to me a bit on the third album: Holy shit, people

are these iconic bands that have such a signature sound that it helped develop are gonna read these lyrics, look into them and ask questions? But I suppose I

the bands around them. You don’t want to take their sound but build upon it. In don’t want that to deter me from writing anything more personal on the fourth one.

Perth, it all boils together until you do get something great like Tame Impala.

Does it serve as a positive outlet for the convolution then?

isolated in Perth works in your favour: you’re constantly comparing yourself to the

you’re either ignorant or arrogant.

Chris: Yeah, you only have the immediate neighbours to compare to. Being so band next door, and everyone’s constantly stepping up each other.

Do you reckon there’s something about the expansiveness of the place that

Jack: Yeah, of course. You’re always going to overthink things, and if you don’t, Catch Psychedelic Porn Crumpets today at 4:15pm at GW McLennan.

inspires you to think broader?

Jack: Well, you’re completely secluded. Nick Allbrook did a really good open essay on Perth and being secluded; you have time to just go off and explore.

Chris: It doesn’t take too many kilometres out of Perth to be in the sticks, lost.

Which is great for inspiration.

Jack: And you don’t feel like you’re in a city; that’s the best part of it. It quickly becomes apparent that... You get kind of bigger than that place.

What’s it like navigating all this press stuff when your entire aesthetic is built around stoner culture?

Jack: [Laughs] I don’t smoke weed at all! I mean, I’ll have a drag if I’m out [band

giggles]. Ok, I had a joint with Chris a couple of days ago. But it’s not like a daily

thing. It used to be. I remember writing the first album, I was dependent on Mary, stuck in this routine where I was transfixed on coming home to have a joint, and

that was my escapism. But once you’re on tour, you cut down on everything. You do get some mad fans that assume you’re on acid every day. Like, ‘have a big tab!’

No man. ‘Have some ketamine!’ Fuck. You just can’t.

Chris: Especially because you’re working! You’ve got a show the next day.

INTERVIEW BY BRUNO COWEN

COME TO THE TINDER BLOCK PARTY SWIPE RIGHT™ SONG DEDICATIONS 8pm – 10pm DJ SETS: Jack River [Friday] and many more 10pm – 2am every night

SITG’s Dimension Traveller in Residence

By Vaughan Dead

LEE MCCONNELL , 31 OF BYRON BAY, IS THIS YE AR’S SITG ARTIST IN RESIDENCE . WHAT DOES THAT ME AN E X ACTLY? WELL , IT ME ANS HE GETS HIS OWN GOLD -PL ATED CAR AVAN IN THE BACKSTAGE VIP ARE A , COMPLETE WITH A FULLY STOCKED BAR AND A PERSONAL OR ANGUTAN NAMED ‘PONGO’ WHO KNOWS HOW TO MAKE THE WORLD’S BEST MARG ARITAS. IT ALSO ME ANS THAT HE IS THE MAN RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR ENTIRE VISUAL E XPERIENCE AT SPLENDOUR IN 2 019, FROM THE POSTERS TO THE ARCHWAY TO THE INSTALL ATIONS TO THE BEER COOZIES TO YOU NAME IT. LEE GOT THE GIG BECAUSE RIGHT NOW HE’S ONE OF THE MOST PROLIFIC AND RECOGNISED ROCK ‘N’ ROLL ARTISTS IN THE G AME , HAVING DESIGNED COVERS AND POSTERS FOR THE LIKES OF DUNE R ATS, DZ DE ATH R AYS, PEKING DUCK , JACK RIVER AND A WHOLE LOT MORE . SO WHY DON’T WE MEET THE MAN ALRE ADY? You grew up in Foster, but then moved to Syd-

ney to chase your dream of working in a Chinese

studying graphic design that’s when I began to draw

of sweat and rotten black teeth and all that stuff…

again. I felt like I got a lot better very fast at Mambo Yeah, it’s so true, man, there’s a really interesting

restaurant, right? That’s right. I worked in a Chinese because I was drawing every day. The 10,000 hours contrast at play when you have something that looks Restaurant called Happy Garden, smoked a bit and rule in full effect. Were you familiar with the whole childish and naïve and bold and playful and then you

did nothing much else, really. I was living my dream history of the Mambo art collective right back to fuel it with all these dimension-warping situations and but then one day I woke up with this strange feeling. their early days when you started work there? Oh outrageous predicaments. They’re just so accessible It was a sense of being unfulfilled. So, I figured I may

yeah, of course. I’ve always loved Reg Mombassa and

too, and it’s for that reason I think cartoons are the

long after, I scored an internship at Mambo. I worked

I think and I definitely copied them a little at the start

think way outside of the box. They act like fertilizer

a full-time role as an illustrator. Not long after, they

be in some way inspired by those guys for sure. A

possible and fun. Well, let’s talk about where you’re

for six years, and by the time I left I was the head art Which cartoons set you off when you were a kid? director. It was during that period I began moonlight- Oh man, I love cartoons! Ren & Stimpy and Rocko’s

roll poster artist is experiencing a bit of a renais-

as well study some graphic design; I did that and, not

Jeff Raglus. They had a big impact on my art and style

for them for free for about three months before getting

(laughs). I think most young Australian artists would on a kid’s imagination. They make everything seem

moved to the city and I went with them; stayed on

lot of your work has its roots in classic cartoons.

ing designing posters and album covers for mates’

Modern life. The more off-beat and weird the more

bands, and that was a lot of fun, but I had no idea it’d

I loved them. And then Jeff Raglus released a book

draw? Back when I was three I used to draw Bat-

massive impact on me, too: a book of rad art that was

through high school I didn’t draw much at all outside

I love how cartoons furtively introduce kids to

lead to where I am now: designing album covers and called Snorky the Wave Puncher, that was one of the rock and roll posters for a living. Could you always first books I got given by my parents, and it had a man, because I loved Batman, but when I was going

a story about Snorky… a puncher of waves.

of art class. I wasn’t that into it. I knew I could do it,

horror, too. Like early Ren & Stimpy has some

circles on clotheslines and stuff. Then when I started

mind. Popping veins and high anxiety and beads

but I wanted to go outside and play with my mates wild storylines and hectic hallucinogenic illustraand chuck rocks at street signs and swing around in tions, and I think that shit is healthy for a child’s

first place where a young mind gets challenged to

at today. Do you think it’s fair to say the rock and sance? Not to say there hasn’t been some incredible shit over the past decade, but there seems to

be a community of crew whose work is instant-

ly recognisable in the Australian music scene at the moment. I agree with that for sure. I mean, with music there are so many opportunities to keep mak-

ing stuff, and maybe there was a period where bands were touring and just using the album cover for their

tour poster and all their visual roll-outs, and that gets a little repetitive; but what Jack Irvine is doing with Skegss is insane, and there are a bunch of crew all

creating amazing stuff for a lot of great young Aussie

time all that shit comes around (laughs), so I can pret-

met some little alien dudes and we discussed art and

godfather, man. When I think of Ben Brown, I just hard, as the saying goes. Over the past few years,

sure whether any of it influenced my work–or if it even

bands. And then you’ve got guys like Ben Brown and he’s still doing the sickest poster art ever. He’s the

ty much send it guilt free. If you work hard you play creativity for around nine light years. I couldn’t say for

have so many iconic posters in my head. Nirvana,

Splendour has really put the foot down in terms happened–but it definitely felt real at the time.

it he’s done them all. It must be a great feeling to

of art, artists, exhibitions, and an all-around vi-

Cosmic Psychos, Big Day Out, Pixies… You name compliment music with your own creations, be-

cause those elements do tie together to mark a

point in history. Well, I loved having mates in bands

of making sure there’s a serious representation

sual experience that encapsulates the entire fez-

zy. What’s your involvement with this year’s SITG been like? I’ve always loved that element of Splen-

and helping them out with their covers and posters,

dour, and it’s something I’ve looked forward to seeing

and no rules about what you can and can’t do or say,

been incredible. The themes and the artists they’ve

that. You can push the limits and not have to be con-

be asked to be this year’s artist in residence is a huge

on top of all that it’s just insane fun to let your imag-

I’ve started experimenting with photographic digital

and in the same way that music has no parameters every year. And you’re right, the past few years have

I feel the same way about the art that compliments included have really set the tone for the week. So, to servative with your thoughts or imagination, and then

ination run wild. What about the rock and roll lifestyle, mate? Cause if there’s one group of animals

out there who can out-party a bunch of fucks in a band, it’s probably artists. I’ve been pretty lucky to

honour. In regards to what I’ll be bringing this year,

shit, and pushing the envelope to create these worlds from my dreams; I’m moving away from pencil on pa-

per, and venturing into dimensions that might exist somewhere else in the universe. Different dimen-

get a fair bit of work with some great bands who don’t sions, dude! That’s what I’m talking about! Have mind a good time, and, yeah, you might end up going you partaken in any psilocybin ceremonies to help

to shows and enjoying a few after parties and, sure, fire up the portal glands? I couldn’t say for sure, but you might end up partying as much as they do, but the good thing for me is that my job is long done by the

at a recent full moon drum circle in the Wreck car park

I did somehow manage to end up on Mars, where I

Photo by Ashi Arizona

THE DAILY SPLENDOUR

ISSUE 11

POSTER BY LEE MCCONNELL

TODAY, JULY 21, WAS A BIG DAY IN 19 87 BECAUSE GUNS N’ ROSES’ DEBUT ALBUM, APPETITE FOR DESTRUCTION, WAS RELE ASED. SOME OF YOU YOUNGER PEOPLE MIGHT BE THINKING , ‘ WHAT? GUNS N’ ROSES? WHO ARE THE Y?’ OR ‘ WHAT? GUNS N’ ROSES? THE Y’RE NOT (INSERT WHATE VER KOOK Y SUBSTITUTE FOR ‘COOL’ YOU’RE USING THIS WEEK ). OR ‘ WHAT? GUNS N’ ROSES? AREN’T THE Y’RE DE AD?’ MAYBE SO, BUT BACK IN 19 87 THE Y WERE THE SHIT, AND IF YOU’D BEEN MORE THAN A T WINKLE IN THE MILKMAN’S E YE AT THE TIME , YOU’D HAVE LINED UP OUTSIDE SANIT Y WITH THE REST OF US. WHAT’S ‘SANIT Y’? SHUT UP. Three years later, on this day in 1990, BBC’s Radio and try to sell the kids KISS merchandise out of the 1983, Stevie Wonder started a food fight at Dallas One broadcast a live Madonna concert and had to trunk of his car. What a guy.

BBQ Time Square and lost. Can you make jokes like

swears, including classics like ‘Fuck,’ ‘Shit,’ and ‘Big kovic’s first feature film, The Vidiot from UHF (or just

Maybe the most important music-related event on

that in 2019? Probably not.

apologise later because the material girl said some

On this day in 1989, pop-parody king ‘Weird Al’ Yan-

Hairy Ram’s Balls.’ Madonna continues to shock

UHF in the US) hit cinemas and the world got their first this day happened in 1969 when Neil Armstrong

Today in 1976, KISS released The Originals, which

who would later play ‘Kramer’ on the popular sitcom

people today by being rank.

was just a repackaging and re-release of their pre-

glimpse of Michael Richards (as Stanley Spudowski),

became the first man to walk on the moon. What’s

Seinfeld. So, not really music-related, but whatever.

the inspiration for ‘Space Oddity’ the hit song that

vious three albums to date. Ordinarily, I wouldn’t That movie is hilarious. bother mentioning KISS because (and I know this will Ludwig

Van

Beethoven’s

wife

called

him

a

that got to do with music? The moon landing was launched David Bowie’s career. Fuck, I miss David

Bowie. Notice how everything turned to shit right

upset seven-year-old me) they are very, very shit, but ‘soap-dodging bastard’ on this day in 1801, but his after he died? Trump, Britain initiated divorce proI want to put in writing that a friend of mine went to

back was turned, so he didn’t hear it. Because his

ceedings from the EU, and Jumanji: Welcome to the

mons, and Simmons would drop him off each day

only four of the requisite five senses, on this day in

Anyhoo, that was today in music.

school with the son of KISS bass player Gene Sim-

ears were cooked. Speaking of clever bastards with Jungle came out.

BY JASON CROMBIE

PU T T I N G A F E S T I VA L L I K E S PL E N D O U R TO G E T H E R M U S T B E I N C R E D I B LY D I F F I C U LT. W I T H A L L T H O S E M OV I N G PA R T S , E X PE C TA N T T I C K E T H O L D E R S , S H I F T I N G W E AT H E R FO R E CA S T S , A N D TA L E N T CA N C E L L AT I O N S , YO U ’ D N E E D A N I RO N W I L L A N D S T E E L-T R A P M I N D TO M A K E I T A L L H A PPE N W I T H O U T TA K I N G O F F A L L YO U R C LOT H E S A N D C L I M B I N G A T R E E . J E S S D U C R O U I S O N E O F T H E C O - FO U N D E R S O F S PL E N D O U R , A N D I F S H E D I D N ’ T C O M E I N TO T H E J O B W I T H A N I RO N W I L L A N D A S T E E L-T R A P M I N D, S H E ’ S PI C K E D T H E M U P N OW. S I N C E T H E F I R S T S PL E N D O U R I N 2 0 01, J E S S H A S S E E N A N D D E A LT W I T H S O M E G N A R LY S T U F F—S O M E O F W H I C H S H E CA N ’ T E V E N TA L K A B O U T, L I K E YO U R U N C L E S T E V E CA N ’ T TA L K A B O U T ‘ N A M . W E G AV E J E S S A B UZ Z I N T H E L E A D U P TO S PL E N D O U R 2 019, A N D G OT T H E R U N D OW N O N S O M E O F H E R B U M M I N G E S T M O M E N T S A S A F E S T I VA L O RG A N I S E R .

Worst festival moments. Go.

really bad. Very few times am I lost for words, but the

steam coming out of your mouth. It’s not your typical

at our current venue, the North Byron Parklands, we

we had, at one point, 20 fucking kilometres of traffic

I think you should get lamb wool insoles. It’s the key.

roads and tunnels in torrential rain. We had so many

I was standing there with my event manager Dennis, Yeah, bring your hot water bottle.

There are a few that really stand out. Our first year

first year when we moved our show up to Woodford,

festival environment.

got approval six or maybe nine months out. It was outside the site, trying to get in. There were news Yes, and a hot water bottle. basically a big country farm, and we had to build crews flying over the top filming the traffic quagmire. Really? contractors on site trying to build stuff on time. When

just going, ‘I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how Leading up to the festival are you looking at the

ahead of the cars rolling in—and it was fucking

literally speechless.

Club; it was the VIP place. It sold out in a heartbeat,

I was just like, ‘Man, what the fuck is going to It looks good, right?

people started arriving, we were still building roads. to solve this, I do not have a solution,’ and both of us– Bureau of Meteorology website every day, like There were literally road compactors 300 metres we’re pretty cool, we can deal with most shit–were watching the changes? raining. And our first offering was called The Country

Did you think about running away?

but then of course we were so busy building roads

happen?’ I mean, it took people four or five hours to

we didn’t really think about catering to our VIPs and get in. they all ended up out the front, yelling, ‘Splendour’s Oh, wow.

I’m looking at the iPhone of lies weather app. And right now, it’s…

Clear skies and 20 degrees or whatever. But I try

not to, because it’s all bullshit and always changes

and I have literally spent many a time in the carpark getting rained on, directing traffic. So, I don’t know.

a rip-off!’ There were fucking hundreds of people. It

Really, really, really bad. So, um, there was that.

night, like, ‘FUCK!’

year we were building the roads and people were

Is that it? Is that everything? That seems really

It was pretty fucking funny, right? Like great

his performance. He was our headliner…

The first one was pretty shit. There was so much

about festivals, you watch that and you go ‘They

Lorde, who was just starting to break. So, we pulled it does get to a point sometimes where you’re just

ever going to happen, because there were things that

you’re up and operating as a festival.

quite hilarious. I actually had a friend who worked on

I’ve got to say weather, weather, weather. It’s always Yes. I should have gotten an education. Life would

So, the VIP punters were bummed.

the festival. The only place in Byron that had a hail

was so bad. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the

Another one would be Frank Ocean. That same Whatever, whatever.

You must’ve loved that Fyre Festival documentary.

abusing me, Frank Ocean cancelled the day before

marketing, they just forgot everything else. And you Nice! Thanks, Frank! What did you do? know you can see it, but it’s like if you know anything We ended up replacing him at short notice with

kinda not that bad. I’ve heard worse stories…

more going on... I couldn’t actually talk about that; I wouldn’t want it printed. It was pretty awful. And

should have known months before that that wasn’t

it off. But you know, it’s hard with a cancellation when kinda stunned by what happens and what you have

needed to happen that you know just weren’t.’ It’s

What else has sucked?

it and she was a little traumatised.

a challenge. We’ve had localised hail storms over

Yeah. They’d show up in their BMWs with their bag

storm was Splendour. We’ve had filthy weather where

to get to their shitty campground. It was bad, really,

so wet. We’ve had, you know, nights so cold there’s

on rollers dragging it through like, half a foot of mud

people are sliding down the Amphitheatre cause it’s

to do.

Do you ever wonder why you do it? have been a lot different [laughs].

PHOTOS BY THE JAMES ADAMS

MORE FESTIVAL SNAPS BY EVERYONE’S FAVOURITE PALM TREE WITH A BEARD, JAMES ADAMS. DID YOU SEE HIM? DID HE TAKE YOUR PHOTO? DID YOU ASK HIM IF YOU COULD GET A PRINT? ASK FOR A PRINT. PHOTOGRAPHERS LOVE MAKING PRINTS FOR PEOPLE. THESE ARE THE PHOTOS FROM YESTERDAY, WHICH WAS ABOUT AS DAY AS DAYS GET. WOOF. DRINK SOME WATER.

PHOTO

TEAM SANTIGOLD

FOALS

SANTIGOLD

CHANNEL TRES

TAME IMPALA

LITTLE SIMZ

POND

enough now to make a record. I like the idea of having a lot of songs and kind of being able to choose what’ll work best rather than just having enough.

We’ve got more than we need, so I think that’s a pretty great place to be.

It was only a few years ago that you were teach-

INTERVIEW BY ERIN BROMHEAD

ing trumpet to kids in Auckland. What’s your teaching style?

SINCE THE RELEASE OF THEIR DEBUT ALBUM, FUTURE ME HATES ME, NEW ZEALAND BAND THE BETHS HAVE SPENT MOST OF THEIR LIVES ON THE ROAD. IN FACT, THE INDIE POP THREE-PIECE ARE INTERRUPTING THEIR JAM-PACKED US TOUR TO PLAY SPLENDOUR ON SUNDAY BEFORE RESUMING THEIR SCHEDULED SHOWS TWO DAYS LATER IN SAN DIEGO. WE GOT ON THE HORN WITH VOCALIST AND GUITARIST ELIZABETH STOKES TO ASK WHAT KIND OF JETLAG STRATEGY SHE HAS PLANNED, AND ALSO TALK NEW MUSIC AND PAST JOBS.

Oh God, my teaching style was pretty tired in the

So, Splendour is right in the middle of your tour.

Definitely a glass half empty. But hear me out! I think

Oh my gosh, I have no idea. Sometimes you feel

because I feel like I’m disappointed less. I feel like

can sleep when you get there, but I think my pol-

something could go wrong’ means that when some-

can, whenever you can. It’s gonna be pretty brutal

relief!’

You must have your packing game down after

process? Do you sit down with the intention to

What’s the jetlag plan?

early mornings [Laughs]. I was quite lucky because trumpet’s not like a super popular instrument, so a

lot of my lessons would be like one-on-one or oneon-two rather than groups of five or ten so it was quite chill.

Do you miss it?

I miss it a little bit, and if I needed to go back and do it again that would be fine. I’m trying not to say any-

thing that will burn any bridges! (laughs) Who knows what will happen.

You deliver some pretty hard truths under the

guise of optimistic pop music. Are you a glass

half empty or half full type of person outside of your music?

that it makes me happier–or something, maybe–

like you have to try stay awake on the plane so you

a healthy dose of ‘Don’t get too excited because

icy is just, like, sleep as much as you physically

thing does go right you’re like, ‘Oh great! What a

though.

When it comes to writing your lyrics, what’s your

spending so much time on the road. Is there any-

write a song, or is your phone full of observations

thing you didn’t pack on your last tour that you made sure you did this time around?

you’ve jotted down on the run?

Writing-wise, I tend to write words first, so that’s the

Hmmm, we’ve got our packs pretty tight, actually.

kind of stuff I’ll jot down. Or I’ll write how I’m feeling

brought my big bottles of shampoo and condition-

it does vary and sometimes words come with a

couldn’t be bothered, so I slipped them into some-

floating around in your head for a while without put-

Once your tour ends later this year, is it true

memos so if anything happens to me I’ll have to get

I try to just get all my stuff into a carry-on, not includ- emotionally and then later on when I’m playing guitar, that’s when I’ll kind of turn it into a song. Though ing instruments obviously. I caved this time and er instead of squirting them into tiny bottles. I just

melody straight away. It’s also nice to have things

one else’s luggage.

ting them down anywhere. I also have tons of voice

you’ll be hunkering down to record album num-

someone to delete them.

ber two?

What’s one thing you’ve started doing now that

Yeah, we get back home in September and then

future you will love you for?

Zealand. But yeah, I’ve been writing this year and we

current self. Who am I? I know that one thing I have

go and trying to put an album down.

on tour that I can’t drink a lot and play good shows.

write more on the road?

before.

there’s a little bit more touring in Australia and New

Oh this is a hard one, I really have to look at my

have some old songs as well, so we’ll be giving it a

done in the last year which is good, is I found out

Are all the songs done or are you still hoping to

So now, once a show is over I’ll have a drink, but not

I managed to write a few more between the break in the Europe tour and this tour, but I feel like we have

Don’t miss The Beths today at the Amphitheatre at 2.15 pm.

BYRON BAY’S BUNDJALUNG PEOPLE FINALLY GRANTED NATIVE TITLE.

A S YO U R E A D T H I S TO DAY, PL E A S E R E M E M B E R T H AT YO U A R E O N A B O R I G I N A L L A N D. A LWAYS WA S , A LWAYS W I L L B E .

WORDS BY ERIN BROMHEAD

J U S T 57 Y E A R S AG O, I N D I G E N O U S AU S T R A L I A N S W E R E G I V E N T H E R I G H T TO VOT E . L E T T H AT S I N K I N FO R A S E C O N D. W H I L E YO U ’ R E M U L L I N G T H AT OV E R , R E M E M B E R T H AT U P U N T I L 19 6 9, I N D I G E N O U S C H I L D R E N W E R E S T I L L B E I N G FO RC I B LY R E M OV E D F RO M T H E I R PA R E N T S A S PA R T O F T H E S TO L E N G E N E R AT I O N . W H E N I T C O M E S TO A B O R I G I N A L L A N D R I G H T S , T H E AU S T R A L I A N G OV E R N M E N T H A S B E E N E V E N S LOW E R TO AC T—I T ’ S O N LY B E E N 2 7 Y E A R S S I N C E T H E H I G H C O U R T R U L E D T H AT AU S T R A L I A WA S N OT T E R R A N U L L I U S I N T H E H I S TO R I C CA S E O F M A B O V Q U E E N S L A N D. N OW, T WO D E CA D E S A F T E R BY R O N B AY ’ S B U N D JA LU N G PE O PL E F I R S T LO D G E D A N AT I V E T I T L E C L A I M W I T H T H E F E D E R A L C O U R T, T H E Y H AV E F I N A L LY B E E N G R A N T E D T H E L E G A L R E C O G N I T I O N O F T H E I R PR E - E X I S T I N G R I G H T S . go to meetings and fight. It’s been like forever on this

It’s been a long time coming, but it’s a huge win not

coast of Queensland. Extending from Grafton on the

for all Indigenous Australians fighting to be legally

north, and inland as far as the Great Dividing Range sisters and my family.’

just for the Bundjalung people of Byron Bay, but recognised as the traditional owners of this land. The

claim covers an area of more than 8,000 hectares of land and sea from Broken Head to Brunswick Heads,

including a section of sea country off the Tyagarah Nature Reserve, north of Byron Bay.

Clarence River in the south, to the Logan River in the

long struggle and now I am happy to be here for my

at Tenterfield and Warwick, up to 20 different dialects

One of the original native title applicants, Stanley

invasion.

years for the determination, ‘by working together we

were spoken in the Bundjalung Nation pre-European Kay, maintained that though he’d been waiting 20

Some ancient languages of the Bundjalung people have achieved a wonderful result.’ In the two decades

are still spoken, but so much of their culture has since first lodging the claim, Kay has witnessed

It’s the first positive determination in an area of New been lost in such a short period of time (it took about

many of his original co-applicants pass away—like

22,000 years of Bundjalung existence in the Byron

instrumental in negotiating an Indigenous Land Use

late Elders Lorna Kelly and Linda Vidler, who were

South Wales with a dense population, and only the

220 years of colonialism to decimate an estimated

rights have been recognised. While there is obviously

Bay area). In that time, invaluable hunting grounds Agreement of the area and gazetting of the Arakwal

second time in the state’s history that native title sea a big problem with those numbers, let’s hope pretty

soon it’s just the first of many in the state. The determination is non-exclusive, meaning the current land-use status quo will be maintained. The native

and profoundly sacred lands were stolen from them.

National Park in 2001. ‘I and others were given an

On April 30, 2019, over 300 people from across the

Uncles to stand up and speak for country, to speak

A celebration of determination

obligation and responsibility by the Aunties and

Bundjalung nation came together in Brunswick Heads for family,’ Mr Kay said.

title rights and interests will be managed by the to hear His Honour Justice Robertson hand down Arakwal Elder Yvonne Stewart was optimistic that Bundjalung of Byron Bay Aboriginal Corporation

the ruling. His words, ‘This is not a determination of

the determination would present new opportunities

Though the determination is specific to the Byron

always been there,’ were met with loud cheers and

people in the area. ‘That recognition that we always

Among those celebrating was Arakwal Elder and

taller, it will give us freedom to access and use our

(Arakwal).

rights. This is a recognition that those rights have and instil a sense of pride amongst the Bundjalung

area laid out in the claim, The Bundjalung Nation (also plenty of tears. spelt Bandjalang or Banjalang) has become a general

term for the whole language area stretching the far world’s most patient woman, Aunty Dulcie Nicholls.

knew that we had, it will give us the freedom to walk resources of country and look after our wellbeing,’

North East Coast of NSW and the Southern Eastern ‘25 years is a long time,’ she said. ‘We always had to she said.

I T ’ S OV E R . I T ’ S A L L OV E R . T H E E N D O F S PL E N D O U R 2 019 . W H AT A G O D DA M N W E E K E N D. WOW. N OW I T ’ S T I M E TO PAC K U P A N D G O H O M E , A N D H E R E ’ S H OW YO U S H O U L D D O I T. W E ’ R E PR I N T I N G I T I N R E A L LY B I G L E T T E R S S O YO U CA N ’ T S AY YO U M I S S E D I T.

1.

TAKE YOUR TENT. IF YOU ABANDON IT, IT ENDS UP IN LANDFILL. BAILING WITHOUT YOUR TENT IS LIKE TATTOOING ‘I DON’T GIVE TWO SHITS FOR THIS PLANET’ ON YOUR FOREHEAD.

2.

3.

BE PATIENT. THERE ARE TENS OF THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE TRYING TO GET OUTTA HERE, SO BE COOL, BE FRIENDLY, BE PATIENT. DON’T DRIVE IF YOU’RE FEELING EVEN SLIGHTLY WOBBLY.

PHOTO BY THE JAMES ADAMS

CROSS WORD

2

1

3

4 5

6

7

8

9 10 11 12 13

14

15 16 17

18

19

20

21 22

23

24

ACROSS

DOWN

1. MR. ED PITIES THEM 7. TOO MUCH LICORICE WILL GIVE

YOU THESE (3,5) 9. AT LEAST HE’S STILL COOL (6,4) 13. MIDDAY FOR THE MIDNIGHT (3,9) 15. BILL GIBSON (3,6) 19. SOMEWHERE YOU MIGHT BUILD A

COUCH FORT OR TAKE A SHIT 20. A. SWAYZE AND THE GHOSTS ARE

INTO THIS 21. RAPPER SHARES NAMES WITH

BLOKE FROM NIRVANA 22. WINNIES AT THE BEACH 23. HE HANGS AROUND PUBLIC

TOILETS (4,3) 24. LIKE ZINC BUT FOR FIGHTING COWBOYS

1. ON THE ROOF 2. NOT GOOD WITH ELECTRICITY 3. CURLY HAIRED AUSSIE SONG BIRD 4. LADY WHAT DOES MUSIC 5. SHAME HE’S GONE RACIST 6. YOUR DAD DOES THIS UP THE BACK

OF THE BUS (5,7) 8. SOME PEOPLE DO THIS UNDER

BRIDGES (4,6) 10. CHOICE, EH, BRO AND SIS 11. CHILL CHEVY (4,6) 12. SOMETIMES THEY’RE

PORNOGRAPHIC AND TRIPPY 14. THEY LIVE UNDER DERMOT

KENNEDY’S BED 16. PLAYED BASS IN THE ZIT REMEDY 17. I TOOK HER OUT ON A DATE (4,3) 18. AMERICAN RAPPER WITH NOT

VERY RAPPY NAME

BREAKING NEWS

STOP THE PRESS!!!

BERT McGRATH’S WORLD OF TANG® ARE HAVING THEIR ANNUAL WINTER CLEAR OUT SALE!!!

SHAME! DAVID BOWIE’S GHOST RIPS OFF PAPER BOY XMAS TIPS! Rumours of David Bowie’s ghost getting up at 4 AM on Christmas morning to rip-off paper boy tips have circulated since the rock legend popped his clogs in 2017, but those rumours were confirmed yesterday

when a video of the pop spook riding from mailbox to mailbox on his BMX appeared on Reddit with the heading ‘I fucking told you he was stealing our tips.’ Spokesperson for the International Paper Boy’s Union,

Greg Snot, 13, said it was scandalous. ‘It’s scandalous. We work very hard year-round delivering papers in

the wee hours of the morning, and the tips people leave in their mailboxes for us on Christmas morning is the only perk we have... besides all the porno mags, comics and Mars Bars we nick.’ Snot then went on to

say that David Bowie’s ghost was ‘well out of line,’ and that wispy see-through apparition or not, he must

be ‘made accountable.’ An emergency late-night meeting was held at paper boy and I.P.B.U. treasurer Chris Grogan’s treehouse last night, and an attempt to contact Bowie and bring him to justice through a

Ouija board was made. Negotiations took a grim turn when the spirit of David Bowie spelled out F-U-C-KO-F-F, but the situation was made worse when Cameron started crying because Martin farted on his head.

‘After that, we all just went home,’ said Snot. ‘Cameron has been pretty emotional since his dad moved out. We probably shouldn’t have invited him.’

Located in beautiful Springrange, New South Wales, Bert McGrath’s World of Tang ® is 90,000 square feet of Tang ® across three levels in the rapturous Yass Valley!!!

THEY’VE GOT MORE TANG® THAN ANYONE IN THE WORLD!!!

IT’S A WORLD OF TANG ®!!!

“I was surprised by how much Tang ® they had.”

– Georgina Boyd, Perth

SLUTTY BOHO GIRL

GARY THE PRIEST

You passed me by the

Hey, Gary, the actual re-

Temporary Tattoo tent and I

al-life priest I met yesterday

heard you say to your friend, while impersonating a priest ‘I’m going for that Slutty

for the purposes of comedy,

Boho look.’ It was easily

just wanted to say thanks for

the stupidest thing I’d ever

being cool and not bashing

heard, and I hate myself,

me with the Jesus stick for

so will you please by my

taking the piss.

wife so I can always have

Jason (02) 6277 3184

an excuse to punch my own

Lewie Dunn’s Email Address I found Lewie Dunn’s email address (lewie.dunn@ gmail.com) and I need to get it back to him. If you know Lewie, tell him to get at me.

Alan (02) 6277 3184 Pie Do you want this pie or can I throw it at a car?

Amos (02) 6277 3184

head in?

Gary (02) 6277 3184 GLITTER BEARD Hey, guy with blue glitter in his beard, I found blue glitter in my girlfriend’s knickers. We need to talk.

Alan (02) 6277 3184

Several Pieces of Fruit On mine morning walk this day, I discovered a quantity of fruit. If this is your fruit, please contact me and I shall return it to you in exchange for a generous carnal reward.

Archibald Cockring III (02) 6277 3184

“When I saw the sign, I was like, Nah, but Bert McGrath’s World of Tang ® is exactly what you would think it is.”

– Damon Eliot, Tuggeranong “Why does he only sell Tang®?”

– Zach Rhys, Mildura Don’t walk – RUN! To Bert McGrath’s World of Tang ®, the largest privately-owned Tang ® outlet in the world!

Bert McGrath’s World of Tang ® 136 Ainsley Road, Springrange, New South Wales

www.championusa.com.au @championausnz