valley views Of smoothies and kayaks I
wanted a kayak. It was a simple request I repeated repeatedly. I talked about how we would go kayaking this summer on the lake. We’d have a blast making family memories while building our triceps and getting a tan. I communicated as clearly as I could, in English, which is the language they speak. I wanted a kayak. They got me a blender. There was a reason for their actions. They like smoothies. And, despite the allure of a sleek kayak cutting through the cool, clear water, it was a distant vision. In my climate zone, you can’t kayak in the winter. You have to wait until summer. Smoothies are available all times of the year – for those with the machinery
to make them. Months the living room for one week, then two, until we of waiting for warm sort of become oblivious weather or immediate to their being there at all. gratification: the choice was obvious. My boys were dying To their credit, they to make smoothies, of didn’t get me any ordicourse, but they didn’t dare remove my megnary blender. They puratron blender from its chased one with a motor capable of packaging. They left that powering privilege to a rocket to me. They can the moon. Jill Pertler Syndicated columnist be surprisingly This thing considerate to doesn’t the needs of blend food. others in the most unIt pulverizes cells; turns expected ways - somethem inside out and supercharges the nutrition- times. The box sat unopened al value like no blender because (it wasn’t a kayever dreamt of doing. ak) and I’ve never been Well, that, and it makes much of a smoothie smoothies. kind of gal. I like a little I appreciated my sucrunch in my food. But, personic blender, I really somewhere between did. But you know how weeks two and three, I it is with some gifts that got tired of stepping over aren’t kayaks. They sit in
Slices of Life
Cap property taxes C
apping Montana’s double digit property tax increases on homeowners would seem a no-brainer issue for legislative candidates. Not so. The focus of Republicans and Democrats alike is on protecting the cash flow to government and placating moneyed special interests. The bi-partisan Revenue Interim Committee unanimously opposed Cl-121 the Cap Montana Property Tax 10 - May 4, 2022
initiative. Their members believe the legislature/ lobbyist cabal is best left in charge of your money. Their two main rationales for opposing Cl121 are that the Montana Constitution is no place for tax policy. In fact, Article 8 Sec. 3 of the Montana Constitution mandates residential taxation at appraised value. Cl-121
simply amends that provision to cap the tax increases on established residences, then new residences, to a maximum of 2% per year. No amendment to the Brad Molnar Constitution State Senator means no meaningful change. Before the vote the committee had an informational panel discussion. Only opponents
Down the Middle
my non-kayak, missile blender and carried the bad boy into the kitchen. My kids reacted with a one-word exclamation: “Smoothies!” We revved up our rocket and shot out frozen, ice cream laden, calorie-laden smoothies like nobody’s business. The kids were happy. I took a look at the literature in the box, which offered healthy smoothie recipes containing a small amount of fruits accompanied by lots of vegetables only a guy like Popeye could love. Call me crazy, but I decided to give it a try. I threw in leafy greens by the handful and added minimal fruit and water. I hit the switch and watched the cyclonic action take my normal food
and transform it into a nutrition explosion. I poured the mixture into a glass and was worried. Then I took a taste. It wasn’t half bad. Surprisingly good, in fact. I didn’t mind drinking it one bit and have blended similar concoctions every day since. I’m having a blast while becoming the epitome of health. (Or so I like to think.) My birthday is approaching and because of the thoughtful gift of the atomic blender, I’m looking forward to being in better shape this year than last. There’s just one birthday gift I can think of that might further enhance my new dietary routine: a method of exercise. You know, like the kind you can get with a
to Cl-121 were on the “informational committee.” An expert on public bonding testified that the only thing that worked was “unlimited taxing authority.” No legislators challenged that concept. Count on the legislature to fix sky rocketing property taxes? The laughter you hear is from the lobbyists opposing Cl-121. The problem has been growing since 2012 and exploded since 2019
but the legislature refused to even address the problem in 2021. Why should we trust them now? All presenters claimed scorched earth scenarios if residential taxes are not continuously doubled. Reducing spending was never discussed. Montana’s families were mentioned only as cash cows for funding government. There is a political action committee op-
Valley Journal
see page 11
kayak. Jill Pertler is an award-winning syndicated columnist, published playwright and author. Don’t miss a slice; follow the Slices of Life page on Facebook. This is a classic column originally published in 2014.
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