Motley Issue 3 2012

Retro Fashion 8 page photoshoot inside

Sen. Susan O’Keefe

Alan Conway interviews the Labour politician

Alex Day

Interview with YouTube star

uccmotley.ie

current affairs entertainments features fashion

It’s the little things You may have noticed in our last issue that Motley’s website was about to be set loose unto the world.

Well, after some teething problems and the ensuing perpetual suspense, I can safely say that it will officially launch very soon – details will be on our social media pages sooner than you think!

But, in the meantime, here is our third issue of the year and it is, as always, as miscellaneous as it can get. We hope you enjoy reading it as much as we did putting it together.

Course work and everything that goes with it may be starting to grow a little bit more as the weeks roll by, but never forget that your friends, the little things you do together, and your monthly magazine will help see you through it.

So, here’s a toast to that invincible bunch!

The Team Editor — editor@motley.ie John Murphy Current Affairs — currentaffairs@motley.ie Alan Conway (Editor) Orla Hubbard (Deputy Editor) Cathal Larkin (Deputy Editor) Entertainments — entertainments@motley.ie Emma Mc Carthy (Editor) Eimear Hurley (Deputy Editor) Tamara Malone (Deputy Editor) Features — features@motley.ie Mae McSweeney (Editor) Senita Appiakorang (Deputy Editor) Peter Neville (Deputy Editor) Fashion — fashion@motley.ie Aisling Fitzpatrick (Editor) Emma Oliver (Deputy Editor)

John Murphy

The Writers Daniel Boland E Von Cheong Nicole Clinton Mary Collins Sarah Commane Sian Cowman Lisa Denmead Kate Dennison Cian De Poar Colm Duffy Luke Field Gavin FitzgeraldSarah Glascott Martha Hegarty Chris Heinhold Gearoid Holland

Orla Hodnett Clodagh Large Shell Leonard Kevin Long Gavin Lynch-Frahill Sarah McSweeney Eimear Mullane Sorcha Nagle Alma O’Donnell Terry O’Sullivan Donal O’Sullivan Aisling Salter Roy Sheehan Laura Marie Whelton Abigail Daisy Woods

Designer — design@motley.ie Richard Sheehy PR/Marketing — pr@motley.ie Louise Maher Photographer Egle Laukyte Sarganova Advertising — comms@uccsu.ie James O’Doherty

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Luke Field looks at the future of the Republican party after a dismal election.

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Sarah Glascott looks at 1960s movie musicals.

Aisling Fitzpatrick looks at menswear style icons.

46-47

29 Tamara Malone talks about FOMO, the fear of missing out

Martha Hegarty looks at legendary Liverpudlian four-piece, the Beatles

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To shave or not to shave? - with Sarah McSweeney

Colm Duffy speaks about a potential global food crisis.

13 39-46 Fashion goes Retro.

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Alan Conway meets Senator Susan O’Keefe , who discusses journalism, women in politics, and political reform – where we are, where we’re going and where we should be.

Senator Susan O’Keeffe was elected to the Agricultural Panel of the Seanad for the Labour Party just over a year ago.

Having come late to politics, Senator O’Keeffe had previously worked as a journalist, famously going to prison for Contempt of Court for refusing to reveal her sources for an article that directly led to the setting up of the Beef Tribunal. An Alumni of UCC, she was also chairperson of the Food Science Society (now Cowpunchers) and received a degree in that field.

What is your opinion on Freedom of the Press in Ireland, and Freedom to Report? Do you feel that journalists are weary of going to print for any reason, particularly defamation?

I think journalists in Ireland are very weary of defamation. I think they have cause to be weary because it’s a country where litigation is a very popular thing. The minute you suggest a story or even start to make phone calls you can be injuncted. So there’s a very strong tradition of using lawyers to stop people and, certainly, if you talk to anybody currently working in journalism they will tell you that that’s alive and well. It hasn’t changed, even in terms of using pictures on television. If you and I were walking down the street, on television, and you were the subject of the report, and I was walking next to you, people like me, walking next to people like you have been known to take cases against the state broadcaster for just being in the picture, for just standing next to you. So there’s a terrible awareness; that doesn’t happen in the UK. It’s accepted that there might be people in the shot, who have nothing to do with the story.

There was no sense that women had a right or indeed had any sense of it, so the strong women will have broken through here and there as they always will, but you have to be almost ten times stronger to have made any impact… but there haven’t been enough of them.

What I like about [50/50] is that it’s non-political in that it tries to embrace people from all walks and all belief, and just say simply, ‘that if 50% of the population are women, then 50% of the representation should be women’. That’s not rocket science, its plain common sense.

So we have become very wary, and I think it makes a journalist’s life difficult because, and this is not an advertisement for journalists to be lazy or useless or not check their facts, but if you’ve got something and you really want to work on it, and you start asking questions and you’re injuncted, newspapers are in a perilous enough state now without taking further risks, and they will reign in and say, ‘you know what, that’s not such a good idea, we haven’t got the resources to fight a case’. So it is a sign of a roundabout; if people out there know that if they threaten to sue, or injunct, it will stop it because newspapers don’t have the capacity to fight back. Pretty much the chances are, you’ll get away with [it], or even a solicitor’s letter or a robust phone call to the editor. The editor has to consider it, has to think, maybe someone has stepped out of line. So it’s a very difficult environment; it’s not impossible, but it’s very difficult.

Is it an achievable goal?

50/50 by 2020 is ambitious, but there’s nothing like ambition – if you lower your sights, you’ll fall lower again, so set a big high target for yourself and work really hard… I think, also, maybe we’ve reached a tipping point in politics now where people are becoming less tolerant of the patriarchy and the male domination, people see the common sense.

One woman said, Norah Casey, on a Vincent Brown that I was on, that we were ‘too busy at the moment to worry about things like that’, that actually ‘we’ve got far more important problems to confront’, which I profou’ndly disagreed with, and I profoundly disagree with her still.

There was never a better time to try and right one of the great injustices. It’s not to say we wouldn’t have had some of the problems we have had, but if we had 50% women we wouldn’t have had… I’m not saying that. But I’m saying that we go at things differently and that’s fine, we are different, that’s what we bring to the table is something different.

But our difference should be part of that management and there was never a better time.

You are involved with the 50/50 group. Given that Ireland has a very strong history of strong women characters involved in politics, why do you feel that this has not translated into a broader representation of women in politics?

I think it’s a very good question. I think what’s interesting is that there have been a number of strong women over the years, but we have lived in a very patriarchal society for a very long time, and when you think about the influence of the church, which is a male organisation, and the patriarchy of inheritance and of money and business, they were all, and the whole of society, has largely been dominated by men.

While you’ve had strong women, they could only ever be isolated or maybe in a small group. There simply were never enough of them to make any significant progress in a political arena, because when we look at areas like the inheritance of seats; if you look around and all you see around you are men engaged in politics, if you were a child growing up in the 40s or 50s or 60s and perhaps there were politicians in your house – but they were all men so you wouldn’t have thought, unless you had somebody very open to that, there wouldn’t have been a place for you. You might have brought the tea, or you might have folded the leaflets and stuck the stamps on the envelops, and you probably knew as much as them as you would have been listening all the time, but people didn’t ask for your contribution and you didn’t know how to make it, they didn’t embrace that, there was no sense of equality.

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The Programme for Government states that there will be a Referendum on the Abolition of the Seanad. As a Senator, do you favour reform of abolition of the Upper House?

Well fortunately I was on record before I ever became a senator when I was asked this question and, indeed, in fact even before I stood in the General Election. I was on record as saying that I believe there should be reform. I think that the political structure in Ireland is like a three-legged stool. There is the Seanad, The Dáil and there is Local Government. If you are going to reform the political system you need to reform all three, and to abolish one is to me the equivalent of cutting off one leg of the stool - and therefore a stool with two legs is more wobbly or less stable, I think that’s a bad thing. Three-legged stools are a very practical thing and they have worked for a long time; farmers would never have risked them unless they worked so there is a good reason for them. But what is often forgotten is that The Dáil also needs to be reformed. So I would favour reform of all three as, while it’s not the whole of the piece, it’s a good start.

In relation to the Seanad the ideal scenario is of course a truly independent Senate where you had, 40 people maybe, who genuinely came from walks of life with different experience. You wouldn’t want 40 journalists, you wouldn’t want 40 teachers, you wouldn’t want 40 gardaí – you want a good strong mix. But part of the business of politics works because of the whips; you get things through, and that is the justification for the whip, otherwise nothing would get done. That’s what they say; I’m not sure that’s true. I’m not sure that you can’t have an independent Seanad, and I would dearly like to see us progress to thinking about that kind of Seanad. Now, Brendan Howlin, the Minister for Public Expenditure and Public Reform, is one of the architects of the abolition of the Seanad and he has said that he still doesn’t see, and I quote him directly, ‘any compelling reason for the retention of the Seanad’, and I think he believes that the committee system can become the scrutinisers of legislation and that they would take on that role, and therefore, what would you need a Senate for?

Given that discussion on Seanad abolition or reform has continued for decades, do you believe it is possible to reform it?

Well, I suppose the political scene has changed significantly in a very small and a very short space of time. I think I said peoples’ tolerance and peoples’ understanding had. Certainly, there’s a new cynicism on the one hand, but on the other hand a new interest; interest will always build a bit a bit of cynicism. But I think a lot of people genuinely want to see political structures more robust, so I think that we probably could, now, at this stage reform it.

I think if it, the referendum, were a case where people were given a yes or no vote, they would say, ‘look, we actually don’t want to somehow give more power to the Executive, so let’s not do that, that’s a bit of a risk’, and some would argue; you’ll hear all sorts of people say that it’s an enormous sort of risk. Vincent Brown will probably lead the charge – that’s his favourite place – and other commentators too. So I suppose if it were then to be retained, I would hope that the retention would mean, ‘alright, we’re going to reform it, we’re not going to keep it as it is’, because there are plenty of things about it, I would say as a sitting senator, that need to be reformed… but I think it’s going to be very interesting. I think it will be a matter of there will be a big number of deeply cynical people saying, ‘just get rid of the Senators, that’s another 60 politicians you don’t have to pay’, and there’ll be other cynics who’ll say it will vest more power in the Executive, ‘keep hold of them! The Executive are the ones we should really fear’. It has the makings of a great political debate. I suspect it will be really interesting, and will have the virtue of a soap opera by the time it’s over.

I’m inclined to think that a group of people in the senate whose sole business is the scrutiny of legislation, because, of course, people sitting on committees running hither and hither, they are trying to be constituency politicians, they can’t give their full attention to this and if you want proper scrutiny you need the peoples full attention - and that’s why I would think a smaller senate would be a good answer. I know in this Programme for Government we are going to have a referendum, and it will not be a preferendum – it will be abolition, yes or no. I regret that, but, as I said, I’m on record already as having said that.

At this stage we had to finish up, Senator O’Keeffe had often answered follow ups before I had even the chance to ask them, leaving me not certain if that spoke more to her journalistic experience or to my own ability. But either way, we are most grateful to the Senator, who accommodated us at mere hours’ notice.

Images: SusanOKeeffe.ie.

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‘It’s just sex and violence, melody and silence’ Orla Hubbard considers conservative Irish attitudes towards sexual violence.

A national debate was rekindled last month when Judge Martin Nolan imposed a €15,000 fine as the penalty for the sexual assault of a teenage girl, allowing her attacker to walk out of Dublin Circuit Criminal Court a free man. This most recent judgment falls against a sweeping backdrop of excessive leniency from the Irish judiciary in sexual violence cases, and is indicative of a much deeper societal problem.

Having considered our legal and cultural context, Ireland’s consistently low prosecution rates for sexual violence will not come as any great shock. In 2010, 29.5% of survivors who contacted the RCNI had reported the sexual assault to the Gardaí. Of this 29.5%, only 30% will ultimately end up before the courts. Continuing with this theme, there has only been one successful conviction for marital rape in Ireland since it was criminalised in 1990. These shamefully low statistics, coupled with the recent spate of weak and inconsistent sentencing, highlights the urgent need for sentencing guidelines for sexual assault cases in Ireland.

Following delivery of the judgment on 17 October, groups such as the Rape Crisis Network Ireland (RCNI) expressed their concern that inconsistent and lenient sentencing puts victims off reporting sexual violence. The judgment in this case is particularly troubling, as it implies that if you have the means to pay a lump sum to your victim, you don’t have to do any jail time. It is shameful that our courts see fit to send out any such message, and their doing so diminishes and disregards the effect that violent sexual assaults have on their victims.

The same judge freed another man last month who pleaded guilty to abusing his two adult nieces. Judge Nolan said in that case that publishing the perpetrator’s name was punishment enough.

Such guidelines already exist in the UK, and the 2011 programme for government promised to establish a Judicial Council on a statutory basis in Ireland, which, when it happens, will hopefully implement similar guidelines here.

Unfortunately, these toothless scoldings are not the isolated whims of one particular judge, but two pieces of a much larger, and more complex, puzzle. These decisions highlight the trend in Irish courts of showing excessive and unjustifiable leniency towards perpetrators in sexual assault cases.

In addition, it is also vital that the DPP continues to play her part in reforming judicial attitudes by appealing excessively lenient sentences.

Only through a combined effort can we restore confidence in the ability of our criminal justice system to appropriately punish the perpetrators of violent sexual attacks.

Earlier this year, a Dublin businessman who pled guilty to a sexual assault ‘of a seriously frightening nature’ was ordered to pay the victim €75,000, and had five-and-a-half years of his six-year prison sentence suspended. The fact that judgments like this continue to be handed down, and followed as good law in the Irish courts, gives the impression that there is one law for the rich, and another for the poor, in this country.

In order to understand why the response to sexual violence has been so inadequate in Ireland, it is necessary to recognise that there are much deeper societal issues at play. Ireland has a long-standing tradition of stigma and silence surrounding issues of a sexual nature thanks to our historically conservative culture, and this applies, perhaps especially, to sexual violence.

Along with our innate moral conservatism, it is undeniable that the Catholic Church had their part to play in fostering this culture of shame and silence in Ireland. Everyone is by now familiar with the cases of Gardaí and community members across the country, who were ostracised by the local clergy and their neighbours for raising concerns about the sexual abuse of children.

Some might argue that this is a different issue altogether from common sexual assault cases, but it stems from the same deep roots of silence, secrecy and burying our heads in the sand, which are all at play in the judgments mentioned above.

Our legal system is failing victims. We can talk all we want about feminism and gender equality, but when our courts tell us that €15,000 is a fair trade for sexually assaulting a teenage girl, we don’t need to wonder why victims don’t expect to be taken seriously.

The perpetrator’s wealth, or lack thereof, should have no bearing whatsoever on whether he is sent to prison – that should be determined by the seriousness of the offence, and ultimately by his culpability for it. The purpose of sentencing is to mark society’s abhorrence of a particular crime, to deter the perpetrator and others from committing the crime, as well as to acknowledge the harm caused to the victim.

Almost immediately after Judge Nolan announced his sentence, a campaign to have him struck off was launched by advocacy groups around the country. But we need to recognise that a backlash like this won’t solve the real problem; he is not the only judge to have imposed unduly lenient sentences for sexual assaults, nor will he be the last, until our deeper, darker cultural issues have been dealt with. Ireland needs strong sentencing guidelines, legal certainty and a national dialogue to end the stigma attached to speaking out about sexual violence.

The main problem with inconsistent and lenient sentencing is that it deters victims from reporting sexual assaults, and it sends out the message that our justice system does not take the crime seriously. Ireland cannot afford to persist with its traditionally weak stance on sexual violence; our courts need to set an example by acknowledging the seriousness of these crimes, otherwise they are simply fuelling the tradition of shame and silence that has long permeated this country.

Images: fdupillar.com, 123rf.com,

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Why we still need Feminism Rumours of gender equality have been greatly exaggerated, writes Sian Cowman.

Feminism has been in the media a lot lately, with the Dublin March for Choice, Pussy Riot’s stunt, the popularity of Feminist Ryan Gosling’s Tumblr, and of course, UCC’s very own newly-founded Feminist Society. Many people are questioning why we need feminism anymore. Don’t we have women’s equality now?

This pressure to look or dress a certain way extends way beyond the workplace, into all areas of life. All around us, advertising, movies, TV shows, magazines and other mainstream media perpetuate this image of the ‘perfect’ woman. How often are images of women Photoshopped to fit into some ideal body image? Ads for winter boots sport skinny models in bikinis – do we need to display naked women to sell furry boots?

Feminism in ‘the West’ has indeed achieved a lot – the right to wear trousers, voting rights, access to contraception, and in some countries, safe abortion. Western society has also moved away somewhat from the stereotype of women’s roles as mothers and housewives. In Ireland, there was the lifting of the marriage bar in 1973, which had decreed that female public servants must leave their jobs when they married. But there is still a long way to go.

In Ireland there has been another victory against the constant media portrayal of women as sexual objects. In September, complaints against a Club Orange ad objectifying women were upheld by the advertising watchdog. The ad featured women inviting viewers to sample their ‘bits’ – the bits are orange bits in the drink, but the intended meaning is not as innocent.

Nowadays, women may not have to leave public service jobs when they get married, but they are still under-represented at the higher levels of the public service. In the EU in 2007, 77.5% of staff at clerical grades were women. In contrast, the proportion of women in managerial positions was only 33%. And, by now, most of us know that only 15% of the Dáil are women.

This problem extends beyond the public service into the business world. In universities across the EU, female students outnumber males in business and law. But the EU average for women in managerial positions is only 33%. And women are still earning less than men, with the gender pay gap in Ireland at 12.6%.

Apart from less chance of promotion and lower pay, women can face another barrier in the workplace: sexual harassment (also true in places of study!). This can range from verbal harassment in the form of sexual jokes or remarks about body or looks, to whistling and staring, to physical harassment such as groping, sexual assault or rape.

As well as these challenges, women in the workplace also feel pressure to dress a certain way: a recent UK study found that ‘one in four women say that they have changed the way they dress to compete with co-workers.’ I can imagine that this is not pressure to wear the smartest suit, but to look good – studies have shown that an attractive appearance can lead to greater chance of promotion and higher pay amongst both sexes. It figures that with fewer women in senior positions, there is greater competition between them to get promoted, and therefore to look attractive.

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There has been some positive action on this issue lately. This summer, in a victory against the monopolisation of popular culture by imagery of digitally enhanced females, one US schoolgirl took on Seventeen Magazine and got them to promise ‘not to digitally alter body sizes or face shapes of young women featured in its editorial pages.’

Incidentally, ads don’t objectify only women: the Bachelors Peas ads were equally objectifying of men. But this isn’t the advertising standard; it’s normally women who are faced with a confidence-shaking daily onslaught of ads featuring females with unrealistic body shapes.

People might say we don’t have to let the media dictate our appearances.

If women dress in a sexual way in their private lives, it must be because because they want to. But I believe the expectation on women to dress a certain way, especially on nights out, is so well-engrained now that it is seen as the norm. As an example, take a look at the Halloween costumes in the shops at the moment - are there any that aren’t ‘sexy’?

People can dress how they like – but peer pressure is especially high amongst young people. It sends out a bad message when universities promote sexist dress-up events like ‘Pimps and Hoes’, ‘CEOs and Corporate Hoes’, ‘Geeks and Sluts’ or Playboy Bunny nights. Men are allowed to dress in sharp suits or geeky outfits, and the girls are expected to show up scantily-clad. I understand that the intention is lighthearted, but what message does that give to young people, by their own universities?

We are being told that men are the powerful, intelligent CEOs, while women are valued for their sexual appearance alone. That’s not good enough.

Sian Cowman is the Gender Equality Officer in the Student’s Union and the Auditor of UCC Feminist Society.

Statistics from the European Commission on ec.europa.eu.

Putting People First?

Alan Conway examines the motivations and effects of the recent Local Government reform paper.

In the coming weeks, just before we are overcome by the farce that is our annual Budget, we will have just about enough time to debate the recent Local Government Reforms brought forward by the Minister for the Environment, Community & Local Government, Phil Hogan TD, entitled Putting People First.

In some regards, this is a document long overdue, and some of the reforms are indeed to be welcomed. In Cork City, for example, many areas such as Grange and South Togher, that are clearly identifiable as parts of the City, with city people and city issues, are under the remit of a County Council prone to ignoring citizens that do not make up the bulk of the vote in their constituency. The extension of the City boundaries will also pave the way, post the next General Election, for the potential to create a single city constituency for Dáil Elections and allow for a more sensible choice in boundaries between rural constituencies. This reform, however, does not tell the whole story.

In Waterford, the merging of the two local authorities may result in the City of Waterford losing its City status. During a time of recession, in a year that the government are promoting as ‘The Gathering’, to demote the second city of the South-East to large town status could be disastrous for the local tourism industry, and would certainly not do justice to all that the City of Waterford has to offer.

And yet there is still more at play here again than this, other, individual case. The abolition of Town Councils is nothing short of a ludicrous response to the precocious situation we find ourselves in. It can be very easy to look upon Government in Ireland and to say, ‘we need to save money, lets get rid of these useless institutions’, but this is to oversimplify the matter, a fact that Minister Hogan is well aware of. At its core, this is a populist policy, more reminiscent of Ray Burke during his tenure at the helm of the Department than John Boland at his.

Further, the issue of Council funding is most likely the greatest issue facing local democracy in this state. As it stands, Councils are forced to rely on rates paid by local businesses that can little afford them. While in good times the Councils would have accepted that the rates currently being charged exasperate negative effects on the local economy, they are currently in a position where they have no other options to burden local business owners with making up the difference in a budget, that all the while is being slashed. Granting local authorities the power to effectively raise revenue through taxation would have been a bold and commendable reform. But that is not what Minister Hogan is about. It can be seen, through Seanad Reform, the Referendum on Judges Pay, and now the ‘reform’ of Local Government, that the motivation of this Fine Gael/Labour Government’s reform programme is to maintain the status quo while satiating the populaces genuine desire for reform with a few juicy media tidbits.

Minister Hogan has shown his hand in recent months when responding to a lack of compliance with the Household Charge by cutting Block Grants to Councils. He has shown that, for all his posturing, the petulance seen during Referenda last year is still the driving aspect of his political character. Putting People First is indeed an apt title for this policy document, but it seems that, as with any policy that this government puts forward, it can take a little bit more work to find out who those ‘people’ are, because it is certainly not the Citizenry of this State.

The reasoning for this is simple: there is appetite in Ireland at the moment that is suitable for political change. People are unhappy with their politicians and a system that has failed them, and rightly so. But this Government’s policy has been to look to cutting the number of Teachtaí, abolish the Seanad, and now to abolish Town Councils. In such a time of change, one would imagine more representation is the ideal to be strived for, not less – but that is exactly what this policy paper, and the current government as a whole, is putting forward.

A more appropriate reform of Local Government would have been to address its failings, and the negative impact that our Local Government has on our National Legislature. An empowered Local Government would hand not just power but responsibility back to the ordinary citizenry as opposed to an unelected City/County Manager, who today effectively operates as local Tsar. Further, the Minister could have considered curtailing his own powers, which extend far beyond what can be described as ‘democratic’ – that is the power to dissolve Councils that displease him and replace them with Magistrates.

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Images: DonalCasey.Com, NiallOloughlin.Com, An Phoblacht

The Big Change Gavin Lynch-Frahill asks how students can find their identity in our restrictive education system.

Over the past month The Irish Times has run a series of articles and special editions on education that has become an annual procedure in the run up and weeks following the release of Leaving Certificate results. Lists of Central Applications Office (CAO) points and interviews with students leaving to go to university or those that have followed other paths in their lives are generally well received by the general public. It makes you wonder where the focus lies in our education system.

vast majority of the population are not in a position to send their children to these schools, so why merit them?

I must admit a point of bias on my own half as I attended a school which is nearly every year placed in the bottom 10% of the league tables. In my own Leaving Certificate class, nearly all of us went on to full time employment or university, yet the league tables let people think that my alma mater is a poor school to send a child. On the contrary, I was on placement in a high performing school last year and I would feel that much of the classes I observed were based on repetition and regurgitation than engagement with the topic and critical thinking, which is required to become innovative thinkers. Innovation in its very nature is to break the mould and be original; there is currently not much scope in education to allow this with the increased pressures placed on teachers to achieve good results.

As a third year student of BEd Sports Studies and Physical Education with History in University College Cork, I have been taught about and observed the great work that is going into our national curricula by the National Council for Curriculum and Assessment. The Junior Cycle Curriculum leads with the heading Innovation and Identity: The Big Ideas about Change. This praxis model for education is a goal which we are all aspiring to as both students and teachers in the education system.

I have four acquaintances of mine who received their results this year in the Leaving Certificate. The first question any one asked them (including myself) was ‘how many points did you get?’ This was ahead of ‘are you happy with your results?’ or ‘where are you headed now?’ This is also a culture of ours that will have to change; all we are asking our students what they have got out of their education is a product at the end of it – a piece of paper and a ticket to university. This is keeping in line with the product model of curriculum and is stopping our students from achieving the innovation and identity we challenge them to seek.

In preparation for my coming placement this year I have been reading the Junior Cycle curriculum and teacher guidelines for History. I also purchased a textbook to familiarise myself with the level of knowledge required. One thing that caught my eye was in every chapter there were past exam questions from the Junior Certificate Paper (some of them being from my own Junior Certificate paper in 2002). Then I return to The Irish Times and other media coverage of the exams. Have we not lost sight of the overall goal? Not once in any news report or article were the words ‘innovation’ or ‘identity’ mentioned in the context of the national curriculum. If we are changing our curricula and exams to reflect the innovative skills and identities of our students, can the media and general public not adjust as well to aid the students?

The alternative to the regurgitation rat race that is the current Leaving Cert/CAO system will hopefully be one that is based on our student’s practical and mental abilities to invent new things and solve problems while building an identity as healthy and contributing members of society.

Although the Senior Cycle is being reviewed and is to be updated like the Junior Cycle is, it is only through adapting our views as a society can this higher curriculum be achieved. The main point I would ask that The Irish Times discontinue its printing of the league tables of Irish schools. The league tables are creating a culture of meritocracy in the education sector, which if we lived in an egalitarian society would be acceptable.

But we do not live in an equal society; some people do not have as much as others and are therefore not in a position to achieve as much as others. Nearly every year €5000+ p.a. grind schools make up a large majority of the top performing schools. The

Images: An Focal .ie, Dept. of Education.

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Meaningful Choice in the Land American Citizen Terry O’Sullivan considers what real of the Free & Home of the Brave choice voters had between Mitt Romney and Barack Obama With the resumption of the campaign after Hurricane Sandy and the election just less than a week after that, many seem to question what all the grandstanding and in-fighting was for. What you might not have known during those tense hours of speculation is that there was a lot more on the ballot than just the Presidential decision. On that day too, every registered US voter (myself included) also voted for members of the Houses of Representatives, and in some states, the Senate and for their state Governor. There was also many state and territorial elections on top of that making it a very important day for Americans indeed.

Apart from sorting through the extremely intricate web of legislatures that exist on city, county, state and national level, many Americans would have felt overwhelmed by the sheer amount of local ordinances they had to vote on as well. The idea that the US public is an ill-informed bunch may be backed up by plenty of statistical data, but it fails to take into account the sheer volume of information it takes to make one informed. As a conscientious voter with a university education, I found it difficult not only to differentiate between the candidate’s sometimes minutely different policies but, because of the frankly strange laws in which I am registered to vote from abroad, to also figure out if I do indeed want to amend the Illinois state constitution to allow benefit increases to public sector workers based off a threefifths majority in the state senate. That last decision is, I’m sure, important, but as someone who has pretty much lived in Ireland continuously for the past 20 years and has no immediate plans to move back to the ‘land of the free’, this referendum doesn’t nearly hold as much impetus to me as The Children’s Referendum. It’s easy to judge the American political system as a dumbed down PR machine, but the simple fact of the matter is that it is quite easy to fall into basing decisions in elections purely on an ideological partisanship rather than get to the heart of the matter. To almost prove my point, this article will only look at the Presidential election as, for me, to try and get to the bottom of the myriad of other races that went on would take at least two more pages of this fine magazine. Even then I would but barely scratch the surface.

differ that much. Obama has said his universal health care initiative is heavily influenced by the health care bill Romney brought in when he was Governor of Massachusetts. On foreign policy, apart from the Republican camp’s vague accusations that Obama is too lenient on China and Iran, they had not provided any policy proposals that would suggest that they would do much different in either regard.

In terms of economic policy they differed somewhat, but apart from some standardization of income tax and cuts to the public sector, they had similar outlooks. Romney supported Obama’s handling of the automotive industry crisis in 2008 and he also supported Obama’s economic stimulus package in 2009 (though he has tried to distance himself from these positions). The problem stems from the pressure that the campaign trail puts on a person because, if you look at Romney’s political positions when he is not running for president, and thus is not under the watchful eye of the media, he is strikingly ‘liberal’ for a person that is being lumbered with the loaded tag of Republican. The change came when he needed hard core right wingers to flock to the polls.

Therein lay my dilemma as a voter in this election – separating the spin from the issues. There is no doubt that both men have to pander to certain ideological groups, but the sheer level of weight given to the opinions of partisan hacks by each candidate makes both of them almost become parodies of the parties they represent. Obama was painted as a big government, tax hiking, immigrant loving Muslim with no right to exist as an American while Romney tried his hardest to be seen as a big business, pro-life, Christian tough man who is going to lead the good ol’ US of A back to the promised land.

In reality, my vote is based off of the partisan hackery I just pilloried. The fact of the matter is that the two party system, made to look like two very different parties are vying for power, is a sham. You are really voting for a product that is being sold to you, not a real ideology. Much like Coke or Pepsi, your decision is really based off of intuition and preference as opposed to cold, hard facts. Much like Coke or Pepsi, my vote is going to be based off of a decision I made years ago because of a commercial I saw.

The way the media has painted this election would suggest that Obama and Romney were diametrically opposed to each other but when you look past party affiliations and some slight social policy differences (Obama is seen as more LGBT friendly than Romney and Romney is slightly more pro-life than Obama), their views don’t

Images: GratefulGrapeFruit.com, JustJared.com.

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The End of the Party?

Luke Field questions the future of the Republican Party after a divisive election.

While the headline show of the race for the White House dominated all other aspects of this year’s US elections, Barack Obama’s win over Mitt Romney was far from the only story unfolding. Congressional Elections, including 33 Senate races, also took place. For the extremist Tea Party wing of the Republican Party, the results don’t look good.

Perhaps the biggest defeat came in Missouri, where incumbent US Senator Democrat Claire McCaskill defeated Tea Party-backed challenger Todd Akin by almost half a million votes. Up to about six months ago, Akin looked set to juggernaut a weakened McCaskill out of her seat; arguably, Akin was the architect of his own downfall after his patronising and insulting remarks about ‘legitimate rape’ caused a firestorm of controversy around a race that seemed to be a safe Republican win. In another Senate battleground, the Democrat Heidi Heitkamp looks set to beat Tea Party favourite Rick Berg.

In at least one high-profile race, it appeared that the Tea Party brand had already become lethally toxic. Wisconsin elected the first openly gay US Senator, Democrat Tammy Baldwin, ahead of GOP candidate Tommy Thompson. A quick scan of the many blogs about politics in Wisconsin––subject to so much traffic ever since the days of the ‘disappearing Democrats’ and the recall election of Governor Scott Walker––credit Baldwin’s success, or at least Thompson’s failure, with the electorate’s distaste for the Tea Party. Not only was the successful candidate, like Sinema in Arizona, an avatar of all that the group hates, but many political commentators in Wisconsin feel the deathblow for Thompson came when a video emerged that allegedly showed the candidate speaking at a Tea Party supporters’ meeting. Whether or not the video was accurate in its portrayal is less important than whether or not the association with the Tea Party was enough to sink a GOP candidate.

Similarly in the elections for the US House of Representatives, Tea Party Republicans experienced significant setbacks. While former Tea Party Presidential candidate Michele Bachmann did manage to hold off the challenge of Democrat Jim Graves, other figureheads were not so lucky. In particular, Patrick Murphy’s defenestration of Allen West in Florida’s 18th district is likely to have hurt the Tea Party. In the 8th district of Illinois, incumbent Tea Partier Joe Walsh – particularly famous as a standard-bearer for the hard-line Islamophobic group within the GOP – was also unseated; his challenger Tammy Duckworth, a double-amputee Iraq War veteran and the first AsianAmerican elected to the House, took home a 10% margin of victory in that race.

This, of course, should not be mistaken for the demise of the Republican Party-at-large. The GOP still has control of the House, and the Democrats failed to get a supermajority in the Senate this time out, meaning that they can continue to dig their heels in on legislative affairs. And when they lick their wounds and prepare for an all-to-play-for White House race in 2016, the Republicans will be faced with a choice as to the direction of their party: to continue their rightward drift, tugged along by a Tea Party that appears to be totally against the grain of US public opinion, or to adopt a more moderate stance. Adopting a genuine small government position, including a liberal approach to issues such as LGBT rights and women’s emancipation, is not entirely outside the bounds of possibility for the GOP, and it could gel well with a bipartisan-leaning presidential candidate such as current New Jersey governor Chris Christie. For the Tea Party, their last hope seems to be a recently re-elected Congressman and failed VP candidate from Wisconsin; Paul Ryan remains a popular figure, far less damaged from Romney’s loss than the man himself, but will he be able to challenge for the nomination in 2016?

The next two years could see a battle play out for the very soul of the Republican Party.

Perhaps more worrying for the Tea Party than just the losses taken is the type of Democrat that beat their candidates; rarely were these battles fought on the right, and as such these results must be viewed more as a rejection of Tea Party values rather than a losing clash between personalities. A particular battle that illustrates this is the nail-biting bout in Arizona’s 9th district between Democrat Kyrsten Sinema and Tea Partyaligned Republican Vernon Parker, the results of which may not be known for several days but which the Democrats are, at the time of writing this, leading by over 2,000 votes. Sinema, in many ways, represents everything that the Tea Party wingnuts hate: a young, single woman, a New Deal-style progressive Democrat, and someone who identifies under the LGBTIQ umbrella (if elected, Sinema will be the first openly bisexual person elected to the House). Seeing this outcome in a red state like Arizona, in a new Congressional district with the highest proportion of ‘independent voters’ anywhere in the state, is guaranteed to send shivers down the Tea Party’s collective spine.

Images: tucsonsentinel.com, Wherethegirlsgo.com.

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Victory for Students in Quebec Chris Heinhold draws lessons from the open style of Quebec’s student organising.

There has been a fifteen-fold increase in the college registration fee in the last sixteen years – that is an astounding leap from €150 to €2,250 since 1996. This rise can only have one of two possible outcomes; either higher education becomes the exclusive domain of a privileged few, or students stand together and demand no more.

Now in my third year of college, I have been on three fairly ineffectual marches and watched mostly from the side lines as the Students’ Union failed to do very much at all. I have heard from people working within departments that they are having difficulty filling positions with the best candidates as the university cannot afford them; while at the same time the president of UCC complains publicly about his struggle to get by on a €232,000 salary. Are these issues being tackled by our Students’ Union?

Now, I know that I should not be overly critical, and I acknowledge the hard work and dedication that many involved in the Union put in, but it is just not an organisation with which I can identify very much. I am a member by default, by automation, and I feel sure that there are many other students out there who feel the same. Maybe it is the bureaucratic structure that does not appeal, or the fairly closed nature of the decision making. Either way, the fault lies as much with me for not trying harder to become more involved, and again I freely admit this. But would I have been more likely to become involved if the structure was different? Is another, less rigid and hierarchical, structure possible? Here I will turn to Quebec, and the student movement that brought down a provincial government.

In 2011, the local government in Quebec unveiled plans to increase student fees by between 75% and 82% over a five year period. An increase imposed in 2007 without mass resistance gave the government the confidence to push ahead with such drastic measures. This time, however, the students fought back. Student protest has a long tradition in Quebec, stretching back to the 1960s. There have been nine student strikes in Quebec over the years, each in response to a proposed fee increase and each resulting in at least partial victory for the students. In late 2011 the Coalition Large de l’Association pour une Solidarité Syndicale Étudiante, or CLASSE, was formed to build towards a student strike and stop the fees. CLASSE went further than most other student bodies and demanded not only that the fees not increase, but that fees for higher education be abolished and a financial transaction tax be imposed to finance education for everybody. This was a popular idea and eventually CLASSE embodied 65 different organisations representing 100,000 students. The decision was taken that a student strike would be needed to change the government’s mind. The students reached out to the wider labour movement and, as a result of the consistent protests and unrest, the Liberal government of Jean Charest was forced to call an early election for August 1st this year, which he lost by a large margin. The new government has agreed to stall any further increase on fees (for now) and also repealed Bill 78, a law passed specifically to halt the student protests and widely derided by the citizens of Quebec.

The general assembly is a central aspect of how CLASSE organises. This format allows for total involvement of the student body. While there are sub groups elected to carry out the actions decided on at general assembly, there are no closed off meetings. If you have something to say, you just go along to your departmental assembly and have your voice heard. This model is easy to establish and relies on nothing more complicated than participation. Another key was solidarity between the different bodies representing the students. Even in the midst of the strike action the student leadership refused to be divided. When the government excluded CLASSE from negotiations, in the hope of engaging the more moderate student federations in a compromise, the latter walked out. Another model for student political participation is possible, but it should be complimentary to the existing structures, not in competition with them. And this solidarity did not stop at the student body; lecturers are under threat and feeling the pressure along with us. In Quebec many lecturers began wearing the red square of fabric (a sign of the movement) and writing papers in support of the student’s position.

We have an opportunity now to stand together. A protest rally and march was held by the USI on Monday 5th of November; that was a good start, but how effective are these annual rallies and marches at protecting students from ever increasing fees and tightening budgets?

What else can we do? Are there voices out there in the student body with ideas which are not being heard in the current system? Organising ourselves through departmental general assemblies will put the collective intelligence and energy of the student body to work for the right to education.

For more information or advice on how to organise a departmental general assembly, see http://organise2013.wordpress.com/

But how did they do it? And what has all this to do with us?

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Living on the Edge Colm Duffy responds to a new report suggesting the potential for a Global Food Systems crash.

Fears over the coming food crisis have led to ‘land grabbing’ in many developing countries. Many countries are buying up vast tracts of land in the developing world in an effort to boost their own food production, and facilitate the production of bio-fuels. As a result, peasant farmers are driven off their customary land to pave the way for large-scale local and foreign agribusiness. This policy of land grabbing by foreign investors is having a negative effect on the food security of developing nations, reducing their capacity to feed themselves and destroying many local livelihoods. ‘Land grabs increase the incidence and prevalence of poverty in the country, by increasing the number of people who can’t grow their own food, and who can’t send their children to school,’ explained Dr. Mickey Mwala, the Dean of the University of Zambia’s School of Agriculture.

World grain reserves are now dangerously low due to the extreme weather events that have become more common in major food exporting countries such as the United States. Further disruption due to bad weather could trigger a major hunger crisis next year, the United Nations (UN) has warned.

The globalized nature of our food system simply lacks the capacity to absorb further shocks. Failing harvests in the US, Ukraine and several other countries this year, have eroded reserves to their lowest level since 1974. The US, which has experienced record heatwaves and droughts in 2012, now holds in reserve a historically low 6.5% of the maize that it expects to consume in the next year, the UN has said. Also, the scarcity of feed crops is expected to have major repercussions for the meat and dairy industries, as the increase in the cost of feed stocks raises the prices faced by farmers. As a result, many farmers are no longer in a position to maintain their herds. This will result in smaller animal herd sizes globally, which will in turn reduce meat and dairy production, and ramp up prices, further deepening the crisis.

‘We’ve not been producing as much as we are consuming. That is why stocks are being run down. Supplies are now very tight across the world and reserves are at a very low level, leaving no room for unexpected events next year,’ Abdolreza Abbassian, a senior economist with the UN Food and Agriculture Organization (FAO) has warned.

Global food prices are relatively close to those that sparked the food riots in countries such as Haiti, Bangladesh, and Egypt in 2008.

Food security, however, is no longer just a developing world issue, but a global catastrophe in the making.

Our planet is much closer to a global food system disaster than many of us realise. It is not just climate change that we must worry about. The global population reached 7 billion people last year, and is set to rise to 9 billion by 2050. When it comes to food, we are now most certainly living on the edge. The global water supply is being depleted, arable land is being reduced, and we are pumping CO2 into the atmosphere, which is leading to an increasingly changeable environment. The world may be able to exist without oil, but we certainly can’t exist without food. A global food systems crash will not just been seen on TV, but will be felt the world over. The world’s greatest challenges now lie in feeding itself into the future. Our society, our generation, must take responsibility for tackling the issues of climate change and population growth if we are to succeed in averting disaster. However, this must be done in a socially responsible way. Stealing the livelihoods of the world’s poorest people is not the answer, and I am sure, not a legacy any of us wish to live with.

‘Food shortages undermined earlier civilizations. We are on the same path. Each country is now fending for itself. The world is living one year to the next,’ writes top US Environmental Analyst, Lester Brown. This year, for the sixth time in 11 years, the world will consume more food than it produces. The climatic events that have seen harvests fail, have ensured that there has been no opportunity to rebuild global reserves, resulting in the further depletion of these reserves year on year.

‘Many forecasts show that if we don’t address climate change very strongly, if we don’t get the food supply system under control, if we don’t stop consuming resources at this rate — we are facing a genuine collapse of civilization’ Paul Gilding, former executive director of Greenpeace Australia and Greenpeace International, has said.

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Images: faowashington.org, blog.wfmu.org.

The Dark Knight Propagandises

Cathal Larkin examines how cinema reflects politics.

a couple of years previously – i.e. kick a French water corporation out of the country. On TV, explicit anti-capitalism can exist alongside the product placement of Heineken and Jameson: ‘The Wire’, the show’s creator, David Simon, says, ‘depicts a world in which capital has triumphed completely, labour has been marginalized and monied interests have purchased enough political infrastructure to prevent reform. It is a world in which the rules and values of the free market and maximised profit have been mistaken for a social framework, a world where institutions themselves are paramount and every day human beings matter less.’ Corporations can financially back subversive work because of the minimal effect their messages will probably have. So few cultural productions have any social message, we’re used to not even looking for one. And if people do actually see the social critique behind the interpersonal stories, are they likely to do anything about it?

‘Reflexive impotence’ is how Mark Fisher describes the prevalent contemporary feeling that you know things are bad, but more than that, you know you can’t do anything about it. It exists in this era of Capitalist Realism, when it’s easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism. It’s a world where capitalism doesn’t justify itself on its own merits, but rather in a depressive deflationary manner that claims no better is possible. Alain Badiou sums up the attitude thus: ‘our democracy is not perfect. But it’s better than the bloody dictatorships. Capitalism is unjust. But it’s not criminal like Stalinism. We let millions of Africans die of AIDS, but we don’t make racist nationalist declarations like Milosevic. We kill Iraqis with our airplanes, but we don’t cut their throats with machetes like they do in Rwanda’.

Before 2011, the answer would probably be an unequivocal no. But with that year seeing the Arab Spring, Spain’s 15M movement, and the worldwide Occupy phenomena, such despondency was no longer justified. People across the world showed that they would no longer accept the lowered expectations of capitalist realism – that something better was possible to imagine, and even create. A propaganda response to this break from our collective interpassivity was necessary; whether self-consciously or not, it came this August with the latest Batman movie, The Dark Knight Rises.

For Fisher, the film that captures capitalist realism like no other is Children of Men. It depicts 2027, when humans are sterile and the youngest person in the world is eighteen. But in the face of the imminent termination of all human existence, neoliberal capitalism stands resilient – as we see in the first scene that not accidentally begins in a franchise coffee shop. When Clive Owen’s anti-hero character, Theo, walks out we see a public bus drive by. It’s old and falling apart, but covering its side is a massive 3D advertising screen. The neoliberal assault on public space and services has obviously continued unabated, while technological innovations have remained solely of use for the pursuit of profit. This reading is further confirmed when we get a glimpse into the lives of the elite during Theo’s visit to his cousin. The house contains Michelangelo’s David, Picasso’s Guernica, Pink Floyd’s inflatable pig, and a transplanted wall with Banksy’s graffiti – what was once publicly accessible is now private and guarded. Reading the sterility theme metaphorically as a sterility of imagination and cultural production, Fisher sees Children of Men as being, unlike the alternative society of other dystopian films, more of an extrapolation or exacerbation of the society we currently inhabit. ‘[S]tagnation and conservatism, not innovation’, are the intellectual and cultural effects of the precarious ontological conditions of neoliberalism.

Batman, the billionaire crime-fighting businessman, has, of course, always been an inherently conservative superhero. But with Bane’s tacked on left-wing discourse, ‘the oppressed’ prisoners being released waving machine guns, and the powerful being ‘cast out into the cold hard world we know and endure’, The Dark Knight Rises takes the right-wing subtext to a whole other level. It has often been noted that the middle class choose their politics based on their fears. Consequently we see that a key to Occupy’s success in America was framing their discourse to put that amorphous class on their side and against the 1%. The response of The Dark Knight Rises is to play on so many middle class fears that the capitalist realist perspective seems once again eminently sensible, and hope is relegated to a dangerous illusion: society may be held together by lies – ‘the Dent Act’, ‘myths of opportunity’ – but at least gangs from the sewers aren’t going to throw us out of our homes and kill everyone with a nuclear bomb.

Interestingly, in these conformist conditions such subversive big budget cinema is not at all unusual. Hundreds of millions can be spent on Avatar, a film whose explicit central themes are anti-imperialism and environmentalism. Corporate bad guys or evil corporations have become omnipresent in cinema, even Disney had the latter in Wall-E. And in Quantum of Solace, James Bond went rogue and did the same as the Bolivian social movements had done only

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Images: Warner Bros. Pictures, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, O Books, HBO.

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adaptions Television: Then and Now

Daniel Boland looks at some of the shows of the past and their more recent adaptations.

Continuing with the retro theme of this issue, I will be taking a trip down memory lane to see how television characters have stood the test of time from the 1960s and proved to be bigger than ever to the modern audience . It seems that quite a few seasoned television shows have branched into the Hollywood scene in the last number of years with big budget films bringing in millions worldwide.

Who could forget Captain Kirk announcing ‘Beam me up, Scotty’ in Star Trek as he boarded the Enterprise? It is hard to believe that ‘Trekkies’ have been around since 1966 when William Shatner took the audience on a voyage through space and time. Star Trek has spawned five related shows running up to 2005 but it was the Hollywood motion picture from three years ago that revitalised the series.

The film directed by J.J. Abrams sees all of Star Trek’s favourite characters together again with big budget special effects. The film grossed over $380 million in the box office showing that enthusiasm for the series is far from over.

series won a Golden Globe for best Drama Series in 1967 and who could forget the famous theme song? The success of the television series led to a film starring Tom Cruise in 1996 as Ethan Hunt an IMF agent, this film renewed interested in the series and spawned three sequels with Ghost Protocol released last year. With a fifth instalment in the works, it is obvious that interest in Mission: Impossible has far from waned.

When you mention Batman, many people will immediately think of Christian Bale but the mask of the Caped Crusader belonged to Adam West long before Bale in the 1966 television series. Those who have seen repeats of the series will fondly remember the fight scenes with the over the top effects through words. In the 1960s, the comic book series was hugely popular, but judging from box office figures people are just as happy to see Batman on film. In 1989 Batman made his return to our screens in the form of Michael Keaton, from here onwards Bruce Wayne was a firm favourite in the superhero genre. It was Christopher Nolan’s reboot that took Batman in another direction focusing more on comic book storylines and now many couldn’t imagine the Caped Crusader in any other way.

The final instalment from Nolan’s trilogy, The Dark Knight Rises, surpassed the $1 billion mark when it was released. Another Batman film may not be in development at the moment but I cannot see him staying off our screens for very long.

Long before Jason Bourne burst onto the screen, the 1960s audience were enjoying a spy filled television series in the form of Get Smart. The American comedy series focused on secret agent Maxwell Smart and his partner Agent 99. The television series premiered in 1965 and continued through to 1970 gathering Emmy Awards including Outstanding Comedy Series. Get Smart got a new lease on life in the form of the 2008 film of the same name starring Steve Carrell and Anne Hathaway. The film was met with mixed reviews when it reached the cinema but successfully renewed interest in the secret agent series, as the original television show was released on DVD to coincide with the film.

The 1960s was evidently a huge time for successful television series, but I don’t think anyone would have anticipated them being just as popular in 2012!

Sticking with secret agents, we have Mission: Impossible. This television series jumped at the success of Get Smart and tried its luck proving to be a roaring success. Mission: Impossible starred Peter Graves and ran from 1966-1973, the

The Old and the New

Over the last decade or so, a sense of nostalgia has taken over the big screen as well as the small. They say that ‘if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,’ so directors play with fire when remaking a beloved movie. Here are some redundant replicas and some remakes that outshine the originals.

Images: gigatonne.com and ABC.com.

Eimear Hurley continues our look into remakes and adaptations by including some of her picks for best originals and best remakes

Originals: Lolita Two film adaptations have been made of Vladimir Nabokov’s 1955 novel about literary scholar Humbert Humbert’s infatuation with fourteen-year-old Dolores Haze. The later version, made in 1997 and starring Jeremy Irons, is a more frank portrayal of the controversial subject matter of the book, but Stanley Kubrick’s 1962 film can’t be outdone. With a screenplay by Nabokov himself, and possibly Peter Sellers’ finest film performance, Kubrick’s Lolita is a true classic.

Airplane!

Airplane! is a reinvention of the 1957 disaster film Zero Hour!, replacing eye-rolling melodrama with laugh-a-minute farce. It has rightfully earned a place in film history as one of the funniest comedies ever made, with a famously quotable script and legendary comedic performances from Lesley Nielsen and Robert Hays. Proving that a mediocre film of one genre can make a brilliant example of another, Airplane! is one remake that you need to see, whatever about the original.

Arthur Arthur is a comedy about an alcoholic, roguish millionaire (played by Dudley Moore) who is transformed by the love of a woman. So when they decided to remake this 1981 movie, the Hollywood bigwigs must have thought Russell Brand an ideal candidate for the title role, having ended his days of debauchery and drug abuse and (temporarily) settled down with Katy Perry. In fact, it lacks the heart of the original, replacing Liza Minelli’s memorable character with a generic goody-two-shoes female love interest, and Moore’s endearing protagonist with another incarnation of Forgetting Sarah Marshall’s Aldous Snow.

In some cases, both the original and its remake are worth seeing, and not just so you can write articles for university publications…

Alfie Alfie is based on Bill Naughton’s play of the same name, but for years the character was synonymous with Michael Caine. Then in 2004, Jude Law took on the role, bringing the bittersweet story of the narcissistic ladies’ man into the 21st century. The 1966 film is set in London, but the remake sees Alfie enchanting a string of New York women with his Cockney charms. Both films deal with social and moral issues in a way that is relevant to their respective ages, and both are warm and funny. The theme song and tagline of the movies ask ‘what’s it all about, Alfie?’ – maybe it just takes two films for him to figure it out.

Remakes:

Ocean’s Eleven

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory/Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

The original Ocean’s Eleven was not unlike Elvis Presley’s wonderfully hokey film of the 1960s – people watched and loved it because it was a Rat Pack movie, the Rat Pack being an assortment of the coolest men on the planet at the time. Fans of Sinatra and co didn’t really expect a smart, stylish and suspense-filled heist; unfortunately, a twenty-first century audience isn’t so easily pleased. Director Steven Soderbergh took this as an opportunity to make the movie that the 1960 favourite could have been, and won the hearts of a new generation with it.

No childhood would be the same without Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory starring Gene Wilder. Thankfully, Tim Burton didn’t want to make the same movie. He wanted to explore the strange mind of the man behind the chocolate bars. The dark side of Willy Wonka was hinted at in the 1971 version, but it seemed that he was just a rather moody and petulant man. Johnny Depp makes the role totally his own, adding weird little mannerisms and portraying a man tormented by his childhood memories. The original is undoubtedly a triumph, but Burton’s film doesn’t disappoint.

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Images: Warner Bros.

YOUTUBE

It’s A Brand New Day! Emma Mc Carthy speaks with musician and YouTube sensation Alex Day.

In recent years, a new way for music artists to burst onto the scene is by doing so online. Uploading music videos and cover versions to YouTube seems to be just as efficient these days as trying to make it on X-Factor or by sending out demos to different labels. Many YouTubers accompany their music videos with little updates on their lives or even skits to garner views or just to give fans more of an insight into who they are. One such personality who has made a name for himself in this online circus is Alex Day. Going by his YouTube moniker nerimon, Alex Day uploads videos detailing the going ons in his life, his music videos and sometimes goes on to produce huge viral hits such as ‘Alex Reads Twilight’ which garnered him hundreds of thousands of views for each video. Emma Mc Carthy chats with the YouTube sensation about his personal experiences on the website and his plans for the future.

in my video and people say ‘have you porked her yet’ or ‘you clearly have sex hair’ or some other mental thing, like suddenly they’re all Sherlock. I don’t really find it that odd, but I’m always baffled that they fall for me winding them up without fail every time! I’ll hold up a plushie and say it’s the wrong name, when people know what the right name is, or I’ll call Los Angeles the Sunshine State (that joke’s worked in two videos now) and watch them literally rage trying to correct my supposed deficiencies. Love it.

Why did you decide to start making videos? Did you ever expect for your videos on YouTube to become as popular as they did? What do you think was the catalyst?

I didn’t dedicate a video to 50 Shades because people wanted me to, I did it because I thought I had an entertaining perspective and it would be worth doing. That’s the only reason I ever make anything; what my audience wants doesn’t come into it. I’m firmly of the opinion Steve Jobs held, or Henry Ford before he designed the car: ‘if I’d asked the public what they wanted, they’d have said “a faster horse”’.

I just make the things I love. If people don’t like it, that’s fine. There will always be people who want me to read New Moon and don’t like my other stuff - but if it wasn’t for me making the Twilight videos, they wouldn’t be here in the first place. They can complain about my new videos all they like. They have to watch them to moan about them, so it’s all good by me.

Does it annoy you slightly when people try and make you film a certain video? I know ‘Alex Reads Fifty Shades of Grey’ is a new fan favourite, so much that you did dedicate a video to the book but that was it, but do you sometimes wish they’d just enjoy your current video instead of commenting for another?

I was making these little comedy sketches, scripted things, but they took months. So in-between the sketches I just made little ‘this is what I’ve been up to’ videos. I’d start them by saying ‘hey guys this isn’t a proper video’ and then just rambling. But I found people liked them just as much so I kept doing them, since they didn’t take months to make! I certainly never expected them to be so popular, not at all. I thought maybe I’d make my local paper. I don’t think there’s been a real catalyst; I’ve just been doing it for a very, very long time.

Your music is a huge part of your YouTube career. What are your upcoming plans for new releases?

Do you find it odd when reading the comments how many strangers are invested and interested in your life, even outside the videos?

What’s been some of your favourite and weirdest experiences in the comments section?

I see it the other way around - that my YouTube career is a huge part of my music. I honestly see myself as a musician first and a YouTuber second. One of my goals set earlier in the year was that I want to have a UK number one before the end of the year, so I only have one more song’s chance to make that happen. I’ll give it everything I’ve got and see how it goes!

Oh man! I can’t think of a favourite off the top of my head but I always play a game of finding my favourite comment, or comment exchange, in the comments of each new video. They’re almost an art form of their own; the comments section of a video is its own entity that will never be replicated twice, each one with its own little jokes and passions. The thing that amuses me most is when there’s a girl

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Images: mag.bent.com, alexday.bandcamp.com and carefulx.com.

Are you still making the thank you videos for people who bought Lady Godiva? Do you think you’ll be able to finish before you just lose the will to live?

Nope, finished in August! I was doing 400 a day by the end to meet the deadline I set myself. It was all fine. Not something I’d do again because it took four months, but not something I regret either. Thanking people for buying my song isn’t so bad (even if I had to thank 10,000 people!).

Alex Reads Twilight are your most popular videos, so much that people still ask you to read New Moon, do you regret doing them or do you think the good results of getting more fans and making a funny series outweigh the negative aspects, such as people wanting you to be a one trick pony and just mock things they don’t like?

I guess we’ve talked about this a little already, but no, I don’t regret doing them at all. I made them to see what the books were really like, and having made them, I found out, so it was a process of discovery for me.

I’m proud to have the videos there but you don’t wanna get stuck doing the same stuff over and over.

Are there any other goals you have set, besides music? Acting, maybe? I know you like to write, so is that something you’d like to spend more time on?

I’m not an actor, I don’t have a passion for acting, so that’s not something I can see myself doing. Music’s the thing that makes me happiest so I’m putting everything I have into that. I do have ideas for books and want to release some stories and some non-fiction travel books at some point, and I have other projects I’m running like my card game Sopio, but right now those aren’t high priorities.

You’ve said in the past that you prefer working for yourself instead of a label, do you think that will ever change?

I’d be happy to work with a label, but I don’t ever want to stop being the main person in charge of my career. If I worked with a label it’d be on my own terms; e.g. they would be helping with financing releases, helping me get press, getting my songs into films and TV shows, legal protection if I ever needed it etc. but I’d still make my own decisions. Unfortunately no labels are offering me that right now.

Can you give a quick explanation of Sopio for people who might not know it?

It’s like Uno, but sillier: you play one card per turn and the first person to 1000 points wins!

Do you think you’ll stick to making videos for a long time or do you have plans for what comes next?

I want music to be what comes next in terms of what people in the world know me for, so right now I’m focusing on that, but as we said YouTube is a big part of that.

Lastly, what’s been your favourite part of being on YouTube?

The fact that I can make stuff people enjoy :) Alex Day’s albums are available on DFTBA Records and new singles are available on itunes.

Entertainments Questions with Alex Day • Favourite film? - Wall•E

• Favourite TV Show? - Buffy The Vampire Slayer • Favourite book? - A Million Miles In A Thousand Years by Don Miller • Favourite album? - Thriller by Michael Jackson (close second: American Idiot by Green Day) • Favourite Video game? - Portal 2 (close seconds: Ape Escape, Grim Fandango) • Which of your own songs is your favourite or is it too hard to choose? - Good Morning Sunshine :D (Close second: Forever Yours)

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You Tuber?

I barely knew her!

Tamara Malone looks at the newest way to get a notable career, YouTube.

‘If you were born really ugly like me, have no fear; there’s steps you can take to be good-looking, kinda’ – so speaks Jenna ‘Marbles’ Mourey in her breakthrough YouTube video, ‘How to trick people into thinking you’re good-looking’, which received 5.3 million hits in its first week online, made Jenna Marbles the number one most subscribed-to woman on YouTube and effectively launched her career as an entertainer. Previously a woman with a Masters’ degree in Psychology, go-go dancing to earn some extra cash, Marbles is now partnered with YouTube, having moved to Los Angeles with her boyfriend and two dogs, living what many would call the high life, and continuing to upload videos every Wednesday.

or subscribers, you can become a partner with YouTube and earn money (not very much, and unless you’re hugely successful you could barely eat on it, but oh well!). Out of this site have risen vloggers (people who ‘vlog’ – record their daily lives and blog through video), comedy skit performers, parodies of famous or popular current music (‘Gangnam Style’, anyone?) and even tutors – people with a particular skill for makeup, hairstyling, crafts etc. – and upload instructional videos for our educational pleasure. You go from somebody with a video camera to a minor celebrity – some even go on to appear on our TV screens.

She’s not alone. Los Angeles has become a centre for the YouTube community as of late, with many entertainers, comedians and vloggers living, working and playing in the sunny city. VidCon, taking place in the Anaheim Convention Center, California annually, is a gathering of these hardworking individuals who put effort and dedication into entertaining us, in most cases without receiving a six-figure salary (and I for one find it refreshing to be entertained by those who do what they do for a love of the job and nothing else!).

As of late, however, things have been changing. With the advent of Google+, YouTube’s layout has been adjusted in order to interface better with the new social networking site. The infamous yellow ‘Subscribe’ button on the top left-hand corner of each video has been removed, and when one is already subscribed to a user, there is now an ‘Unsubscribe’ button appearing overhead. YouTube spurns recommending new users on the homepage in favour of old favourites, and is loath to associate one video with another if both are from the same user and similar, as it may be considered spam.

These adjustments mean that it is much harder than ever before for new channels to get noticed, and even uploaders who have been popular for years are losing subscribers and views by the thousands.

YouTube began in 2005, created by Chad Hurley, Steve Chen, and Jawed Karim as an efficient, accessible video-sharing community, dominated by user-generated content. It is described by Karim as being the place ‘where anyone could upload content that everyone else could view. That was a new concept because up until that point, it was always the people who owned the website who would provide the content.’ This, in a nutshell, is the appeal of YouTube; we get to view people from every walk of life and from all over the world.

Since then, it has become the third mostvisited site worldwide, after Google and Facebook. It is the reason that someone can go from being an ordinary-Joe one day, to a Jenna Marbles or a Shane Dawson the next.

All of this leaves YouTube with an uncertain future, and this could be the beginning of the end for the multimedia giant. Yet users such as Onision (look up his ‘Banana Song’) refuse to abandon the site, and are firmly sticking to their guns. The beginning of the end?

Maybe. But perhaps just a new chapter in the complex development of the ’Tube.

To start, all you need is a video camera or phone, and the resources and ability to upload your videos to the site. If they are of a certain quality and you receive many views

film Our Fair Lady

Katie Dennison ponders just why gals go gaga for Golightly.

‘And I said, “what about Breakfast at Tiffany’s?” She said, “I think I remember the film.”’

Of course she said that. Any woman who wants to be in with a chance of making/keeping female friends must revere the film and Audrey Hepburn, without question. Ever hear of a close, long-lasting friendship that started with two women agreeing that Breakfast at Tiffany’s is overrated? No. Ever hear of a murder inquiry starting out that way? At least 67% of the time (note: this statistic may not be accurate). But what is it about old Audrey and that particular film that turns intelligent women into hero-worshipping pod people?

To begin with, there is the young woman living alone in New York City. For young girls growing up in unglamorous places like Ballincollig and Ballyhaas (no I’ve never been there, but it sure doesn’t sound glamorous) this movie gave them something to strive for. A cute apartment with a fire escape you could play music on, a good looking guy living upstairs and the ability to own a cat without being seen as a crazy spinster – that was the dream! But more than that, it was Holly Golightly herself. That beautiful young woman with the natural grace and charm no one else seemed to be born with, and a quirky, yet vulnerable, personality that made all the guys fall for her in under two minutes. The closest our generation has to Holly is Zooey Deschanel and even she doesn’t really count because she is a NUT JOB – seriously, have you seen New Girl?

Audrey Hepburn gave us the little black dress, classic pearls, the huge up-do and, to brunettes, a sense of self-worth that no blonde bombshell can take away from us! Marilyn was a knock-out, sure, but Audrey was more real to us in this movie than any female actress before her because she was something different. Holly/Hepburn wasn’t a girl designed to be a sex-symbol for men, or to make us feel bad about ourselves. She was a lady with flaws and insecurities, with a sense of humour, intelligence and stubbornness, but above all she was a real woman.

Hepburn once said: ‘There is more to sex appeal than just measurements. I don’t need a bedroom to prove my womanliness. I can convey just as much sex appeal, picking apples off a tree or standing in the rain.’

So there you have it. The best way to find love is to collect fruit during a monsoon. Thanks Audrey.

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Images: Penguin Books, Paramount Pictures.

film

The Movie Musicals of the 1960s Sarah Glascott takes us through some of her favourite movie musicals of the past.

The Sound Of Music

West Side Story

Possibly the most beloved musical of all time, The Sound Of Music was released in 1965. The score was composed by the legendary duo Richard Rodgers and Oscar Hammerstein. Vocally, ‘Climb Ev’ry Mountain’ and ‘The Sound of Music’ are splendid. However, ‘Do-Re-Mi’, ‘My Favourite Things’ and ‘Edelweiss’ are fond favourites. The Sound Of Music was nominated for 10 Academy Awards and won a total of 5 including Best Picture and Best Director (Robert Wise). In 2001, the film was selected for preservation in the National Film Registry as it was deemed ‘culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant’.

Based on the 1957 Broadway show, West Side Story was released as a film in 1961. The inspiration for the musical came from Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. The music and lyrics were composed by Leonard Bernstein and Stephen Sondheim. Bernstein who composed the music for the original stage show considered the musical arrangements in the film to be ‘overbearing and lacking in texture and subtlety’. West Side Story has such a great variety of songs and dance sequences that it is difficult to single out one favourite. ‘Maria’, ‘Tonight’ and ‘Somewhere’ are the epic love songs while ‘America’ encompasses the Latina side. Praised by both critics and audiences, West Side Story went on to win 10 Academy Awards which included Best Picture, Best Director (Robert Wise) and a special award for Jerome Robbins, who directed the stage version and assisted with the dance sequences in the movie.

Mary Poppins Made in 1964, Mary Poppins, kick-started Julie Andrews’ film career. Music for the film was composed by brothers Richard and Robert Sherman. There is no denying that the most impressive musical numbers of this film are ‘Chim Chim Cher-ee’ and the superbly choreographed ‘Step in Time’. My all-time favourite has to be ‘Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious’ – yes, that is the right spelling! However, if you prefer the heart-breaking stuff ‘Feed the Birds’ is the one for you! To date, Mary Poppins is the most Oscar-Nominated and Oscar-Winning Disney film in history.

It received an astounding 13 Academy Award nominations. Notable awards include Best Actress in a leading role (Julie Andrews) and Best Original Song (‘Chim Chim Cher-ee’). Unlike many movie-musicals, Mary Poppins was based on a novel rather than a stage show. The musical finally made it to the West End in 2004 and has been running ever since.

Oliver Eight years after it first appeared on the Broadway stage, a film adaptation of Oliver was released in 1968. Lionel Bart was the mastermind behind the music, with John Green as the film’s musical director. Mark Lester’s (Oliver) singing voice was dubbed by Kathe Green, daughter of John Green, a fact that wasn’t made public until 1988. In my opinion the most impressive numbers both musically and choreographically are without a doubt; ‘Consider Yourself ’ and ‘Who Will Buy?’ However, ‘Pick a Pocket or Two’ is definitely my favourite - it’s just so darn catchy!

Oliver received extremely favourable reviews and swept the box offices.

It is considered one of the few film adaptations of a stage show that is actually superior to its original. At the 1968 Academy Awards, Oliver won Best Picture and Best Director (Carol Reed). A special Academy Award was given to Onna White for her outstanding choreography.

My Fair Lady Adapted from Pygmalion by George Bernard Shaw and released in 1964, My Fair Lady is one of the most well-known musicals of all time. Alan Jay Lerner and Frederick Loewe composed the music and personally, I love ‘Just You Wait (Henry Higgins)’, the most annoyingly catchy song in the entire film! However, nobody can deny that the best known and most loved song from My Fair Lady is ‘I Could Have Danced All Night’ which is truly an excellent song, and oh so romantic!

The film won 8 Academy Awards including Best Picture, Best Actor (Rex Harrison) and Best Director (George Cukor). Interestingly, Audrey Hepburn’s singing in the film was dubbed by Marni Nixon.

The only song Hepburn actually recorded was ‘Just You Wait’ as her voice suited the harsh-toned chorus of the song.

Images: Wordsworth Classics, Universal Pictures.

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War in the Kingdom

Nicole Clinton examines the scandals in one of Hollywood’s biggest studios, Walt Disney Pictures The last 18 months have been riddled with ups and downs at the Disney headquarters. In fact, it could be claimed that the studio first entered this maze of uncertainty back in September 2008, following the sudden exit of their widely popular chief Dick Cook.

Just a mere fortnight prior to this, Cook had led the studio’s annual D23 Expo, exhibiting their future projects such as Pirates of the Caribbean 4, The Lone Ranger and The Muppets. This fuelled speculation that Cook was forced out by the company’s willingness to modernise proceedings. His departure also had repercussions for their future projects; Johnny Depp (perhaps Disney’s biggest star ever after the success of their Pirates franchise) was a close friend of Cook’s and after his exit, Depp stated that there was ‘a crack in [his] enthusiasm’ for committing to a fourth film.

Disney replaced Cook with Rich Ross, the former head of their TV division. This garnered much criticism as, although Ross had experienced success at the Disney Channel with hits like High School Musical and Hannah Montana, he had no previous motion picture experience and he was being given control of a major Hollywood institution.

By 2011, Ross’ mistakes were becoming evident. Failure to advertise the latest Pirates venture in America led to poor sales and, just in case Ross hadn’t offended enough big shots, in August 2011 he halted pre-production on one of Disney’s future blockbusters The Lone Ranger, also starring Depp, citing budgetary issues. The fact that one of Hollywood’s most successful companies was having money problems indicated that their $4 billion purchase of Marvel had not broken even. They had also forked out $200,000,000 apiece to cover the cost of both Oz: the Great and Powerful and John Carter. It seemed that Ross was trying to break ties with any characters that had built up close relationships with Cook in order to write his own legend. Insiders believed that Ross wanted to make Robert Downey Jr. his star, the way that Depp had been Cook’s. This was possible seeing as Downey was leading Disney’s new franchises Iron Man and

The Master of Suspense

The Avengers. After the film’s team agreed to take pay-cuts and some expensive scenes were cut, Ranger was given the green light again. Ross may have won this battle, but the next challenge would lead to his downfall.

There are two words that pretty much sum up Ross’ time at Disney: John Carter. The biggest flop in movie history, Carter caused a loss of around $200,000,000 for Disney. In a town where you’re only as good as your last hit, Ross only lasted a mere month after this. Carter’s mistakes were obvious from the top; for a film that was based on a little- known comic and had no major name attached, Carter would have needed a vast amount of effective advertising to become a hit. The posters were extremely weak (plain, yellow writing, two monsters fighting and a tiny Carter in the middle) and the television advertising was almost non-existent. When the film bombed, a finger-pointing competition ensued. First, Ross tried to blame the disaster on John Lasseter for pushing the project, and then on Dick Cook for giving the disaster the green light. But everybody knew that Ross had the power to stop the production at any stage and didn’t.

In mid- April 2012, Ross was fired and replaced by former Warner Brothers’ chief Alan Horn. His penance? He was ousted before he had the chance to take credit for The Avengers, starring his pet Downey. He leaves a legacy of confusion and disappointments behind him. But I guess that’s what happens when you take a job that you can’t handle and piss off half of Hollywood!

Images: Disney, Marvel

Orla Hodnett previews Hitchcock, the new film surrounding the ever intriguing filmmaker.

Based on the book Alfred Hitchcock and the Making of ‘Psycho’ by Stephen Rebello, Hitchcock deconstructs the making of Psycho, one of the defining films of the twentieth century, and looks at the personal life of the filmmaking visionary that was Alfred Hitchcock. Director Sacha Gervasi explores the legends and tales surrounding the renowned eccentric Hitchcock, going beyond just the reported on –set madness by looking at the personal life and domestic concerns of the Master of Suspense. The film goes on limited release this month, before wider release early next year. The quite obvious reason for this is to squeeze into the Oscars deadline and if it does indeed win, it will be the first Hitchcock project to receive an Academy Award as the director was criminally overlooked in his lifetime. With this conviction that it is an Oscar contender, hopefully this is indication of a very promising cinematic experience.

The cast is particularly noteworthy, with cast members metamorphosing to bring this highly influential film back to the silver screen. Cast in the titular role of Hitch himself is Anthony Hopkins, who underwent an astounding transformation to take the role, togging out in elaborate prosthetics. Hopkins is just one of an extremely impressive cast, including Helen Mirren, who plays Hitchcock’s wife Alma. Undertaking the role of Janet Leigh is Scarlett Johansson, whose old-Hollywood beauty is well suited to the role of one of the most iconic ‘Hitchcock Blondes.’ Johansson is partnered with James D’Arcy as Anthony Perkins, who bears an eerie resemblance to the iconic Perkins. Other cast members include Jessica Biel who plays the harassed Vera Miles; Toni Collette is scarcely recognisable as Hitch’s long suffering production assistant and CSI’s Wallace Langham as celebrated graphic designer and long-time Hitchcock collaborator, Saul Bass.

The subject matter makes for interesting viewing, as Psycho was famously plagued by budget troubles and other controversies. As compelling as Psycho is as a thriller, the tales and rumours which surround the production almost equal it in intrigue. Hitchcock had always been noted for putting his actors under extreme pressure and for his eccentric on-set behaviour. Not only that, but the film was plagued with budgeting issues, as Paramount studios were reluctant to fund the project. The gruesome subject matter and the change from Hitchcock’s usual star-studded thrillers made Paramount very reluctant to produce the film. They refused to fund and the film had to be made on the Universal lot. In the end, the film was funded through the re-mortgaging of the Hitchcock home and produced independently.

The film is not just a 120 minute reflection upon the issues of funding and producing a film. It works as a sixties period piece, as it focusses on one of the most significant cultural events of the decade. Not only that but the dynamic of Alfred’s and Alma’s marriage is hypothesised. Director Gervasi’s previous work includes the highly successful documentary Anvil!: The Story of Anvil, which took a ‘behind the music’ look at the Canadian rock band. It seems to be the internal skeletons behind these people and projects which seems to be a point of interest for Gervasi. With Anvil! Gervasi stated that he wanted to bring the personal stuff to the fore and he has gone for a similar approach here, looking closely at Hitchcock’s relationship with his wife, Alma. Not only were the couple married, but were very close partners and collaborators, with Alma making significant contribution to his films.

That such a film as this can be made indicates the infamy of Psycho and Hitchcock.

In few other instances could a film be made about the production of a film, without it lacking some mystique or intrigue. Such is the lingering interest in and respect for the work of Hitchcock. The Master of Suspense has an almost mythical veneer over everything he did; compounding the image we have of the voyeuristic, obsessive, genius director. Hitchcock looks as though it will be a witty, interesting look on the focus point of Hitchcock’s career, Psycho.

Images Fox Searchlight Pictures

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music To the Toppermost of the Poppermost!

Martha Hegarty takes a look at the most iconic band of all time.

From the opening chords which melt into an echoey ‘I read the news today, oh boy’, he’s got you. Surreal, evocative, funny, twee, disenchanted and more than a little eerie, ‘A Day in the Life’ was the song that cemented The Beatles as far more than a flash in the pan. For a song that at its core is about perception, it represented both the rapidly changing face of The Beatles’ music as well as the diverse evolution the band had made from the early moptop days of Liverpool to superstardom to the creative explosion that was Sgt. Pepper. It’s impossible to listen to this album without considering that it also marked the beginning of the end. The Fab Four had quit the screeching oestrogen-fest that was live performances, John had just met Yoko, George had found India, Paul was trying to hold together a sinking ship while fending off death accusations and Ringo… well, whatever Ringo does.

Though Newsreel scenes, ’60s television footage and commendably reinacted interview clips provide a narrative arc, it is the presence of the band itself which is the bones of the show. The Classic Beatles are not simply four boys in rented grey suits who only occasionally swerve into caricature territory (a coquettish moon-faced Paul and a hyperbolically whiney Diva John). Instead, they aim to embody the actual personalities and humour of each member. In spite of very little physical similarities, the crucial relationships and witty banter between songs, chat shows and faux-recordings was uncanny.

We’re all familiar with the detached retro sheen of posed photographs, but you only have to delve a little under this black and white surface to see just how bright, funny and often surprisingly risqué each Beatle was. It was this humour which brought even more life and three dimensionality to the group, whose sheer force of spirit and personality yanked music out of the Buddy Holly Teddy boy era and drop kicked it into the Swinging Sixties. Their giddy lack of censorship also adds enduring authenticity and substance to their songs, compared to some wooden bands today which can seem to be constantly reading off autocue.

You only have to YouTube ‘John Lennon Clap Your Hands, Stomp Your Feet’ to see just how free their reign was.

Despite the fact that almost all of us listening to these songs today weren’t around to witness the band’s nine year lifespan, it’s a story with set characters that remain recognisable and thriving in our modern mythology. To be mega-current and quote The Perks of Being a Wallflower: ‘Nobody can be as big as The Beatles because The Beatles already gave it a context. The reason they were so big is that they had no one to compare themselves with, so the sky was the limit.’

However it is the music which rightfully takes centre-stage in the show. With the greatest back catalogue in history at their fingertips, the band as expected make good use of the bevy of hits.

Their style in performing everything from ‘I Wanna Be Your Man’ to ‘Across The Universe’ is so unnervingly exact, it prompted the whole audience to rave and producer and fifth Beatle George Martin to note that ‘the vocal resemblance is uncanny’. Much like the recitals in the three Beatles films, they retain that same strain of weird, tongue-in-cheek humour met with the energy and pure skill that made The Beatles one of the most memorable groups of all time

In light of the 50th Anniversary of the release of their first single, Love Me Do, fans flocked to The Everyman last month to the sellout show of Get Back: The Story of The Beatles, a documentarycum-musical exploring the slings and arrows of an outrageous rise to fame. We’re bounced from the leather-clad days of The Cavern Club to The Ed Sullivan Show to Shea Stadium, through the psychedelic haze before their last live performance on that infamous rooftop.

Irish Artist taking the country by storm!

Images: Parlophone, Apple

Cian De Paor rates new Irish singer-songwriter Gavin James

With the release of his first EP Say Hello, Gavin James singer songwriter has really taking the nation by storm. With his release topping the iTunes album chart and being rated five stars, it’s no surprise that Gavin James is Irelands answer to Ed Sheeran.

After a successful year of touring and gigging, most recently with the Heathers, Gavin James has really broken into the Irish market and seized it for his own.

His presence on radio stations recently has been praised by listeners and critics. Although just being a relatively new artist, he still has a long journey ahead.

The Dublin born singer has been working hard on working on his album for the past number of months and it’s no surprise that no time was wasted. With the EP, his first single Say Hello is a breath of fresh air and catchy at the same time. With the simple guitar riff that really makes you want to dance and air guitar ta’fuck, the music styles of Damien Dempsey and Glen Hansard and other artists of relatively the same genre have influenced Gavin James in his performance and style hugely. The acoustic feel and funk are major factors in his style. Although there are many artists that base their sound on the acoustic guitar, what makes Gavin James different? His voice; it is clear, and hell does he know how to sing! After seeing his performance in Cyprus Avenue I was very impressed by his skills.

The EP which promotes all of Gavin’s skills in song writing is an entertaining buy; songs such as ‘For You’ and ‘Hole in My Heart’ really grasp emotion and connectivity with the audience. The songs are steadily paced, but lyrically perfect

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with the rhythm. After its release, the EP topped the chart – beating such wellknown artists as The Wanted and Robbie Williams. This is an indication of the music market now, and it is bang on. With the slow release of this artist to the masses has really worked for Gavin James. It has left fans waiting for more and they will get more no doubt in the coming months!

The slow but jumpy sound of Gavin James style gets the listener every time! (note: guys, if you want to seduce the girls, this artist is the new Barry White!).

The four-song EP can be listened to free on the Hotpress website now, or you can buy his EP on iTunes. Gavin James is currently touring and will be playing in the Pavilion, Cork on the 15th November

Image: Hot Press

Seeing RED

Kevin Long critiques Taylor Swift’s new foray into the world of heartbreak and hope

‘These are the hands of fate / you’re my Achilles heel / this is the golden age of something good and right and real’, sings Taylor Swift in ‘State of Grace’, the opening song from her fourth studio album Red. The lyrics echo the predominant themes of Miss Swift’s previous albums (love, relationships, break-ups and boyfriends), but there is evidence of progression here, especially in the production and sound of the record. The previously mentioned song is the musical product of a U2-meets-Temper Trap conception, and one of the standout tracks on the album. Taylor’s decision to team up with new producers (including pop-song heroes Max Martin and Shellback) for her latest album is a smart one. It allows her to quietly establish a wider global audience without alienating her core fans. ‘I Knew You Were Trouble’ dabbles with an experimental electro-pop sound with touches of dubstep in the chorus while ‘22’ is a booming bubble-gum pop anthem that still retains Taylor’s trademark quirks. The production is far slicker on Red than Swift’s previous works, and her experimentation with her sound is both a welcome and clever one.

Taylor Swift has had phenomenal success at such a young age. Her album sales combined so far have totalled over twenty-two million sales while her singles have amassed to a staggering fifty-plus million worldwide. Her commercial success goes hand-in-hand with critical acclaim. Her sophomore album Fearless managed to win the coveted Album of the Year at the 2010 Grammys making her the youngest recipient of the award to date. Having received all this at the tender age of twenty-two the question of longevity in the music industry must trouble Swift’s mind on a regular basis. Luckily, she manages to evolve as an artist on fourth record without sacrificing her integrity or delving down the all-too-travelled route of crude sexualisation.

Red touches on the familiar aspects of Swift’s library in terms of content, but

her delivery of the songs has changed as well as her approach to the topics. The arguably sexless attitude to relationships of Taylor Swift’s previous records has shifted towards a more mature understanding of what exactly adult relationships entail. On more than one occasion on the album she gives subtle nods to sex. ‘I hear the sound of my own voice asking you to stay’, she sings on the beautifully understated ‘Treacherous’ that showcases Swift’s ability to deliver emotion in her singing. Later on in ‘All Too Well’, a track most definitely about her relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal, she speaks of the nights where he made her his own. The silly, sometimes immature, Taylor Swift is still present though, as anyone who has heard lead single ‘We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together’ will know

Red struggles to maintain impact throughout the course of the bloated album’s sixteen songs.’Sad Beautiful Tragic’ fails to deliver the impact that ‘All Too Well’ managed effortlessly, while ‘Starlight’ is a forgettable gesture to Ethel and Bobby Kennedy. The duet with Ed Sheeran (on ‘Everything Has Changed’) works brilliantly, but the duet with Gary Lightbody of Snow Patrol falls short of expectations.

Despite the media’s association of Taylor Swift with notorious break-up songs about famous ex-boyfriends both the opening and concluding songs on Red speak of the hopeful, more romantic elements of love. One of the most remarkable aspects of Taylor Swift as an artist is her ability to create lyrics that play out like a movie or a pop-up book upon listening, and that is most evident on ‘Begin Again’. Regardless of its flaws Red is an accomplished record that will undoubtedly help Taylor receive new appreciation, particularly in the UK and Irish markets, as well as assert her as the global star she is set to become.

Images: Big Machine.

Recommended Listen.

Sixties music has always been iconic for a reason. With the emergence of The Beatles and the perfecting of pop with lashings of rock’n’roll, the era is just a music fan’s dream. Not many bands from the sixties can boast that they’re still going today but the Rolling Stones certainly can. With a new album and tour on the horizon, we felt it was time to break out the classics such as Satisfaction, Jumping Jack Flash and She’s Like A Rainbow. No matter what you say about the aging rockers, they’ll still be cooler than most of us will ever manage.

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books A Hint of Sweetness to Battle the Cold…

Mary Collins takes a taste of the Joanne Harris novel, Chocolat.

A book from the wonderfully talented Joanne Harris, Chocolat tells the story of the mysterious Vianne Rocher as she breezes into a quaint town of in southern France and sets up a chocolate shop at the start of Lent, which causes controversy that reverberates through the whole village, with interesting and magical consequences.

Beautiful and intriguing, Vianne Rocher is an interesting character. A woman with two faces, she seems the kind to inspire conversation wherever she goes. There is an air about her which sasys that here is a woman instantly comfortable wherever she is, whoever she is. She is effortlessly charming, yet behind the façade is someone desperately wanting only to be loved and accepted. With her daughter Anouk in tow, her efforts to blend in only clarify how unique she is – a supposed witch, an unmarried mother who unashamedly peddles pleasure in a town of mediocrity, with no religion.

In place of an antagonist, we have the indomitable Francis Reynaud, the village priest – the powerhouse of the community – and in a small religious village such as this, his verdict can often be the deciding factor between acceptance or exile. Mystified by the opening of a chocolate shop during Lent, he quickly becomes infuriated at the revelation that Vianne isn’t Catholic, and won’t be intimidated. As the supposed villain, he inspires a surprising amount of pity; he desperately clings to his self-enforced misery in the hopes that he will be saved in the afterlife. While he pontificates from afar about how poisonous Vianne is, he is fighting a lost battle. Humans are, at heart, pleasure seekers (even he derives a perverse pleasure from his pains), and in a pleasure starved village, his ways of metaphorical self-flagellation fall on deaf ears. Reynaud and Vianne have more in common than they realize – both terrified of rejection and desperate for approval, it is their similarities that drive them apart more than their differences.

There is an array of wonderful supporting characters – the feisty Armand with her zest for life, the wise-beyond-her-years Anouk, Roux is one to watch as well, as he becomes more comfortable and opens up. The bible groupie Caroline Clairmont provides bittersweet comic relief, and the subplot of the heart breaking marriage of Josephine Muscat is definitely edge of the seat.

Room For More?

There are those who say that the battle of chocolate versus church is a political one at heart, a social commentary under the guise of a sugary coating, but I don’t think that is the case. I think it’s about the war that wages in all of us, indulgence versus guilt – and what could be more of a guilty indulgence than chocolate? It’s about people, and how the actions of one can effect or inspire others. It’s about magic, but not in the conventional sense.

It focuses more on the magic we all have and how little everyday things, in the right set of circumstances, can be incredibly powerful. Vianne may be a ‘witch’, but she does nothing which could not be achieved with charm, care and patience.

The theme of the book is undoubtedly love; the fear of it disables Reynaud, the love for their family is what inspired Vianne and Armande and the dark side is what scarred Josephine. Love is like chocolate – it’s something very personal to all of us. We all have our preferences- some like it smooth and silky, some like it nutty, some like it dark. We’ve all tried it once, and while it can take some time to find your kind, most find their niche in the end. As I sit here and nurse my hot chocolate, I wonder how different we really are at heart, and if life really is like a box of chocolates?

Image: Black Swan.

Alma O’Donnell delves into the world of the Room.

Room by Emma Donoghue is a novel that has a knack for both moving and horrifying its reader in equal measure. Shortlisted for the Booker Prize in 2010, the story begins with our hero Jack turning five, yet Jack is no ordinary boy, Jack has never left Room, a concrete garden shed with an electronically locked door. Jack lives in Room with Ma, who was abducted and imprisoned seven years ago by a man known to Jack as Old Nick, a harrowing inversion of the idea of Santa Claus, who Jack knows as a man who brings their food and Sunday Treat. Since it is told through the eyes of Jack, Room becomes a warped fairytale; all of the furniture are seen by Jack as having personalities, and even weeps when his friend Plant dies. In a sense, Jack has been given the ideal childhood, he has the complete attention and devotion of his mother, yet the reader can unravel the sinister reality of Jack’s life. After Jack begins to ask questions, Ma tells him the truth: that the world which he views on the television is real; that there is a whole world outside their walls. It is after this that Jack and his Ma plan an escape. It is after they escape that Jack’s world begins to fall apart.

The narration in the novel is seamless; you completely believe that these are the words and thoughts of a child. Emma Donoghue herself had a five year old son when she wrote this and adapted his words into her writing. While the inspiration for the novel came from news

of the Fritzl case, this is really not a novel about abduction or abuse, but more on idea of captivity. Jack has everything he needs apart from freedom. What if the world which you knew was fine, but you were locked away from the world? For Jack, Room makes complete sense to him; as it is all he has ever known it doesn’t even feel small.

Room is, of course, miniscule in the eyes of Ma, yet she hides her sense of confinement and claustrophobia as best as she can from her son. Perhaps the poignant aspect of the novel is how Ma shields Jack from the horrors of their reality; she never wants him to know that he is a prisoner, until the time that they need to try and escape, and so all of her attempts to be found are enacted as part of a game for Jack.

At its heart, Room is a novel which explores the mother and child relationship which is pushed to the limit.

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I cannot stress enough how unique a book this is to read; Jack’s innocent perception of his situation and his struggle to adapt to the outside world is both engaging and touching. Yet this is not a novel to tug at your heartstrings; rather than pity Jack, you will amazed by his resilience. At no point does this story become sentimental, yet it will remain with you long after turn the last page. No matter genre of novel you prefer, Room will completely capture your imagination and challenge Image: Little, Brown and Company. your perception of the world.

Dear Hunter

Terry O’Sullivan takes a look back at the career of the creator of Gonzo, Hunter S. Thompson.

In 2005 one of America’s pre-eminent political humourists died.

Hunter S. Thompson mixed his scorching anger at what the US political establishment had become with absurdist humour which resonated through the elections of people like Richard Nixon, Ronald Reagan and George W. Bush.

Surely the humorously intense way he broke down the campaign trail would help enlighten a younger generation to the importance of being enfranchised through what can be a dull and confusing round of primaries and electoral colleges?

covered in 1971. In this book he pretty much delivered the state of the union address to the counter culture in his famous ‘wave speech’ in which he soliloquised on the death of Sixties America. He continued his decadent drug fuelled appraisal of society with his magnum opus Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail ’72, where he was a political correspondent for the US Presidential elections of 1972. This collection of articles propelled Thompson into the upper echelons of political journalism. His gonzo approach of endorsing rank outsider George McGovern (whose death on the 21st October of this year made international headlines) ended up propelling his campaign to victory for the Democratic nomination, while also inadvertently hastening the end to the campaign of Edmund Muskie when one of Thompson’s satirical articles accused him of being addicted to an obscure drug called Ibogaine. It turned out many people, and even a few respected journalists, didn’t realise it was just a piece of humour and Muskie’s campaign took a nose dive from there.

Hunter S. Thompson began his career as a sports journalist for the newspaper of an Air Force base at which he was stationed. After being discharged for constant insubordination, he first gained notoriety for an exposé he did on the Hell’s Angels, for which he suffered a savage beating when the gang realised he was not going to give them the publicity that they had hoped for. His campaign for sheriff of Pitkin County, Colorado also made headlines when he wrote a piece called ‘The Battle of Aspen’ for a fledgling Rolling Stone. His habit of keeping his head shaved allowed him to refer to his crew cut sporting Republican rival as his ‘long haired opponent’. This could be seen as his first foray into politics as he ran on his own ‘Freak Power’ ticket (whose logo of a double thumbed fist clutching a peyote button has become iconic amongst the counter culture).

He achieved real fame with his semi-fictitious novel Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (the screen adaption starring Johnny Depp as Hunter’s alter ego Raoul Duke) which savagely dealt with the death of the American Dream. With this and a few previous articles he exposed the world to a genre of his own invention called Gonzo (defined as the reporting on facts using a subjective or even sometimes a fictitious viewpoint to get to the core truth of a matter and present an accurate representation of an event/matter without having to rely on the burden of being fair or objective). The book almost involves a meta-nonfiction in that it is based on the fact Raoul Duke is covering events like a District Attorney’s narcotics convention and a motorcycle race which Thompson himself

While his output after this declined because of his infamy and his trouble dealing with the recognition in the public eye, this did allow his last novel (written in the early 1960s) The Rum Diary to be published in 1998 (which again had Johnny Depp playing his alter ego Paul Kemp). Up until his death he held the honorary title of chief of the ‘National Affairs Desk’ for Rolling Stone. On his death he left behind a legacy that would be the envy of many a writer. Two of his novels had been adapted into major films, he is held up as helping to define the New Journalism movement and author Tom Wolfe called Thompson the greatest American comic writer of the 20th century.

Few would disagree with his assessment.

The Great Gatsby: Love and Deceit

Images: magpictures.com, Amazon.com

Donal O’Sullivan brings us back to the 1920s with Fitzgerald’s most revered tale.

The Great Gatsby has long been considered Fitzgerald’s finest literary accomplishment, one of the great American novels and a definitive example of life during the roaring twenties. Its central themes of love, deceit and greed have stood the test of time, and with Baz Luhrmann’s big screen adaptation set to hit screens this summer, now seems as good a time as any to delve into what makes Gatsby great.

Set in the fictional New York Suburbs of West and East Egg, against a backdrop of prohibition, we are immediately presented with a contrast of wealth. This was an age in which people’s determination and greed allowed them to improve their social standing and take their place in the upper tiers of American society.

In East Egg we have the old money, those who have enjoyed the wealth of their families for generations and the social ties that go with it. On the other hand, we have West Egg, the nouveau riche, those who have made, or are attempting to make, their fortunes themselves to better their own lives and social standing.

It is here that we find our titular character, the mysterious Jay Gatsby, in the midst of lavish parties thrown in his mansion, an outward display of the wealth he now commands, where guests arrive uninvited and know as little of each other as they do their host. Why does Gatsby stand removed from these events, a spectator rather than a participant? It is also here that we find our narrator, Nick Carraway, who has moved to the area to try his luck as a bondsman. He soon becomes entwined in the mystery that is Gatsby, and as the story unravels and we learn the truth of Gatsby’s origins we find that we are dealing with a

‘rags to riches’ tale of love, where the characters strive to reinvent themselves to suit society perceptions, rife with secretive affairs and delusions of grandeur. No one is really as they seem, and deceit seems to be a prerequisite for members of the upper echelons of society. Is Gatsby really the bootlegger and criminal that his unexplained wealth may suggest or is he something more?

This is a story that has been told hundreds of times over, but it is a love story with a twist.

Just as Fitzgerald himself strove to improve his social standing to win the hand of his wife, Gatsby seeks reinvent himself completely to prove he is worthy of the love he desires.

But if he must change this much to win a love which he has already experienced can it ever be the same? Or will he be left alone at his parties, amongst a sea of strangers, distantly waiting for the one guest who will never arrive?

Fitzgerald’s Gatsby is, without a doubt, his finest work, and the posthumous success has awarded him the literary acclaim he always sought, to justify his own need for fame and fortune. This is a fantastic read for anyone who wants to immerse themselves in the America of Flappers and the Jazz age, but also for its universal themes of love, deceit and greed. If you don’t read the book, make sure to check out the upcoming film; Leonardo Dicaprio should make a fantastic Gatsby, but I’ll wait until I see the film to pass judgement of Tobey Maguire as Nick Carraway!

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Images: Penguin Books, Bazmark films

The Thirteen and a Half Lives of Captain Bluebear by Walter Moers Roy Sheehan reviews the charming tale for children and adults alike.

‘A bluebear has twenty-seven lives. I shall recount thirteen and a half of them in this book but keep quiet about the rest. A bear must have his secrets, after all; they make him seem attractive and mysterious.’

Roald Dahl, JK Rowling, C.S. Lewis, Darren Shan – the list of notable authors of children’s literature is endless. With the success of novels such as Harry Potter, The Twilight Saga and The Hunger Games, this niche is proving to be increasingly popular. However, very few authors are able to create a piece that can be enjoyed by people of all ages. The Thirteen and a Half Lives of Captain Bluebear is a book that can be appreciated by all readers despite its genre. The cartoon-like writing style, colourful title and detailed artwork identify the book as children’s literature, and the lack of sex, strong language and adult themes reinforces this idea.

The novel is one that is so delightfully witty that it can be enjoyed by countless groups of people, not just the children it was written for.

The novel chronicles the first thirteen periods of Captain Bluebear’s life such as his life as a pirate, his life as a student, etc., and the story takes place in the fictional continent of Zamonia which is the location of several of Moers novels. Readers are invited to follow Captain Bluebear as he travels across the continent in search of his purpose in life. This journey sees Captain Bluebear meet a wide variety of imaginative characters such as mini pirates, babbling billows and emo unicorns.

Moers’ playful style of writing almost makes reading The Thirteen and a Half Lives of Captain Bluebear like watching a cartoon in print; any real sense of plot is abandoned in favour of a series of almost anecdotal episodes from the main character’s formative years. It is a case of ‘this happened’ and ‘then this happened’, and each episode is almost entirely separate to what happened before and after. The lives discussed are decorated with creative characters, zany situations and witty wording which make each page burst with imagination.

tv goodbye

For younger audiences, this book will be a tale narrating adventures of a talking bear. Older audiences will be able to enjoy it as it takes the typical talking animal world of children’s media and parodies it. They will be able to pick up on the ironic humour presented that would go over the heads of the children reading the text.

The book is at times too cartoonish.

There is very little character development from the protagonist. As the book has more than 700 pages, there is plenty of opportunity for him to grow significantly, but the Bluebear we witness in the early chapters is largely the same at the end of the book. The peripheral characters are very one sided; many of them exist in only one episode Bluebear’s lives so, while they may intrigue us, we aren’t given an opportunity to invest our feelings into them.

The Thirteen and a Half Lives of Captain Bluebear is a remarkable piece of literature. While the book is found in many children’s literature categories, it reads like a book for very advanced children, which is one of the reasons why it is so appealing for adult readers as well. The book was released in 1999 in Germany and has since seen a UK and a US release.

While the UK received the book well, American commercial success wasn’t gained.

Image: Eichborn Verlag.

Eimear Mullane and Clodagh Large discuss their favourite moments of the finishing TV show.

4. Despite the fact we see Chuck Bass sleeping his way through the Upper East Side, we can’t help but have a soft spot for him. Men want to be him, girls want to change him. From season one until this final season, he has always been the Casanova of the New York scene (you wouldn’t kick him out of bed for eating caviar crackers). So this is probably why we all found it so shocking in the final moments of the season three finale when Chuck was cornered by thugs and shot for refusing to give up the engagement ring he had intended for Blair.

What made it even worse was the fact they left us in suspense until season four.

This year sees the end of one of the most popular television shows to come out in recent years: Gossip Girl. Written by the same writers who wrote the O.C. and based on the Gossip Girl novels, Gossip Girl follows the lives of Manhattan’s elite rich teenagers, showcasing the hippest locations, the most fashionable garments and the most explosive of storylines. You would think these rich teenagers have it easy, but money can’t buy privacy with the anonymous online blogger, Gossip Girl, revealing every secret they’ve ever had. Looking back, it seemed only fitting to mention some of the best storylines throughout the show’s six years. Here are just some of our favourites.

1. The ‘OMG moment’ when we saw the usually prim and proper Blair Waldorf perform a striptease in a burlesque strip club, followed by the famous car scene where we saw her get it on with STD-ridden rich boy Chuck Bass.

5. Nate Archibald is commonly referred to as ‘Golden Boy’ but is he REALLY all that Golden or does he just have terrible taste in women? Most of Nate’s love life throughout the six seasons consists of him cheating on women or women cheating on him. It seems there’s no true love for Golden Boy or is there? From cheating on his childhood sweetheart Blair Waldorf with her best friend, to being used and abused by multiple psychopaths, Nate’s happiness never lasts for long. In the last two seasons we’ve seen him go from cougar Diana Payne to under-ager Sage, the potential stepdaughter of Serena. Like all of Golden Boy’s romances, this one realistically will not last. Not only is Nate unsuccessful with women he is also unsuccessful is one of his life aspirations which is ultimately taking down Gossip Girl. One highlight for us and most of the female population is the fact that most of the time we see Nate; he is lying in bed showing off those beautiful ‘golden’ abs of his. Oh Golden boy!

2 .

Jenny Humphrey losing her virginity to the same Chuck Bass despite the fact he tried to rape her three seasons earlier.

6. You would think rich people would be so conscious of money and family so how did con artist Ivy Dickens find it so easy to weasel her way into the Van Der Woodsen family and the rest of the Upper East Side? Pity the real Charlie Rhodes appeared and rained on her parade. Realistically no one liked either character but we did find it amusing to watch them be kicked to the curb… where they belong.

3. Always an outsider, Dan was dubbed ‘Lonely Boy’ by the ‘Queen B’ of Constance, Blair Waldorf. This title follows him through the six seasons despite the fact he’s not been so lonely. From the ‘it girl’ Serena Van Der Woodson to notorious bitch Georgina Sparks to the con artist Ivy Dickens, Dan has made his way through the ladies of the Upper East Side. Most shocking of all his hook ups has to be Blair Waldorf. The best friend of his ex-lover who was still infatuated with him, the ex of both his best friend Nate and his arch nemesis Chuck Bass, Blair Waldorf and Dan Humphrey were not a couple ANYONE saw coming!

As the final season draws to an end, we reflect back on the previous seasons and one question comes to mind, will we ever find out who Gossip Girl really is?

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Images: Warner Bros.

tv Downton Abbey or Downton DRABbey?

Lisa Denmead looks back on the story of the critically acclaimed series.

It is safe to say that this period television drama, now with three seasons under its belt, is a far cry from those boring old shows you were tortured to watch for history in school.

The show is based in the English countryside of Yorkshire in which lives the aristocratic family, the Crawleys. The large estate in which they live is based upon a difference in social class which is referred to as upstairs and downstairs. The Crawley family consists of Lord and Lady Grantham and their three daughters Mary, Sybil and Edith who occupy the upstairs of the house, the ‘well off ’ part. Also occupying the role as Violet Grantham is the well-loved actress Dame Maggie Smith who brings nothing but humour and pure entertainment to the role of their sharp witted and nosey grandmother. The downstairs part of the house consists of butlers and maids who serve the Crawley family.

one another, oblivious to one another’s feelings. However, throughout the show, in true dramatic fashion, there is always something that keeps them apart and stops them truly being together. You will be pulling out your hair trying to guess if they will ever be together, but keep patience as the story spans over the first two seasons before you find out if they ever make it.

Although there are a number of exciting historical impacts in the show such as the sinking of the Titanic, World War I and the outbreak of the Spanish Influenza, there are a number of great dramatic and juicy storylines involved. Throughout the three seasons there are a number of nailbiting storylines and some of them are pretty similar to those seen in the soaps, such as the likes of a whirlwind romance between a butler and an aristocrat’s daughter, a murder plot which entails weeks of ‘did he, didn’t he?’ and a long lost relative coming back and rocking the house into utter turmoil. Some of this stuff you could easily find in the likes of Eastenders or Coronation Street, right?

Though the show first aired in Britain, it has now become a much-loved show all over the world and has done very well in America. In total it has been nominated for an astounding 16 Emmy Awards of which it has won 11, including Maggie Smith winning for the Outstanding Supporting Actress Award in a Drama Series. Gotta be amazed that at the age she’s still winning awards!

It really is impossible to turn your back once you’ve watched the first episode, as the bitchy remarks passed back and forth from the sisters, accompanied with the witty and brutal remarks made by Maggie Smith, allow for a comedic effect to the show whilst the impact of the Titanic and the first World War really covers your fill your drama and action (for the male fans of the show). It really is a show that will leave you wanting more. I would nearly call it Downton FABbey!

One of the most well-loved storylines of the show has to be the ‘will they, won’t they’ romance between Lady Mary and Matthew Crawley (who is her cousin). At the beginning of their relationship they detest each other as Matthew is to be the next heir of Downton – a title which Mary sees as rightfully hers. Slowly they begin to grow closer and thus begin to fall for

Just a bunch of Misfits: Sorcha Nagle reviews the new series of the supernatural hit.

[May contain spoilers] One of the latest episodes of Misfits began with the usual vulgarity provided by Robert Sheehan (Nathan’s) replacement as ‘funny guy’, Joe Gilgun, who plays Rudy (his power being he has a split personality). In the last series they decided to stay split, his more introverted side staying away from the action while his outgoing, and sometimes disgusting, side runs right into things head on. We also lost Simon and Alicia, who’ve been replaced with two new recruits, Jess and Finn; Jess has x-ray vision and Finn is meant to have telekinesis, but it’s a bit crap. Lauren Socha who had played Kelly pleaded guilty to aggravated assault and will not be returning to Misfits, so they’ve written her a cop-out part where she is supposedly in Africa defusing landmines, making great use of her ‘I’m a fucking rocket scientist’ power. Interestingly though, her boyfriend, Seth, seems to have come back from Uganda for some Pot Noodles. We’ve still got good old Curtis who spent most of the first episode locked in a freezer. As the first episode closes, we see that a new probation worker has arrived who isn’t taking shit from anyone.

And for some reason Finn has got a lovely blonde woman tied up in a padlocked room in his flat.

Working our way in the second episode, we are safe in the knowledge that Finn is absolutely mental. The group’s community service begins with them being models for a blind sculpture class. Curtis gets paired with Ally, a blonde haired blue eye beauty who turns out to be a bit racist. The probation worker makes Curtis switch with Rudy who, of course, rides her the first chance he gets. Remember that lovely blonde woman from the last paragraph? Well she actually turns out to be the mental one, using her power to get Finn to do whatever she wants. Seth, being a dealer does his thing and takes her power causing the inevitable break-up. For the next episode we can look forward to there being three Rudys instead of two and a mad bitch, Lola, who likes to watch Curtis work until his hands bleed.

This series, from the first two episodes at least, feels a bit like the writers are just sitting in a room with 100 monkeys on typewriters trying to come up with new twists and turns and they’re not really getting it right. Maybe I’m wrong, but so far into this season it seems they should’ve left it at series three and walked away with it being a hit instead of dragging it out and disappointing their viewers.

Images: E4.

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The Eye of The Storm

Features Mae McSweeney investigates the line between the sensationalist and the sincere in broadcasting.

I’m reading back over some frantic notes I scrawled during the day-long Fox News marathon on October 29th, the day that Hurricane Sandy hit the East Coast of America. I recall the struggle to tear my gaze away from the garish, ever-changing ticker tape warnings and bombastic meteorological forecasts of Rupert Murdoch’s favourite hype machine.

All day long, I did nothing but follow the story of Hurricane Sandy – a luxurious endeavour, especially considering how that Market Research project deadline was looming as large as any Franken-storm. It was really hard to believe what was happening – the lowest pressure weather system to ever hit the American north-east, with a week to go until the Presidential Election? It’s like Independence Day meets The Day After Tomorrow, with a dash of Days of Our Lives thrown in for good measure. Oh my days.

Just a quick disclaimer: I know how low a tolerance we all have for old news these days, so bear with me. Franken-storm was more than something that trends on Twitter for a few hours and is no more – which is probably what many of the residents of New Jersey’s barrier islands thought when they decided to ignore calls for evacuation, but I digress.

It’s too easy to be a know-it-all from the safety of one’s comfy stove-side couch.

It’s my own cosy voyeurism that worries me. It all feels a bit too... entertaining. Neil Cavuto conveniently described the pre-landfall flooding as the ‘attraction before the main event’. Is broadcasting a serious natural disaster as a nail-biting day long marathon of suspense manipulative, trashy and immoral? Or is it unavoidable?

After all, the stakes are so high that it’s hard not to get hooked on the ‘story’. Wall Street shut down, the subway at risk of flooding, a Presidential election where the swing votes could arbitrarily pull either Romney or Obama to the top of the polls. The whole scenario was so absurdly cinematic. Even clearly Photoshopped images of gargantuan CGI clouds swirling above the Statue of Liberty were circulated by gullible Tweeters as the real deal. Yet, it was real; New York City actually flooded, people really died.

A few weeks ago, Charlie Bird came to UCC courtesy of the UCC Journalism and Media Society to debate the question of whether journalists did all they could have done during the Celtic Tiger to expose corruption. Did they present the facts as they knew them? I left with a sense that they hadn’t – not because the leading broadsheet critics were in cahoots with corrupt Fianna Fáil lobby, snickering over brown envelopes, cigars in hand. Often, the case is simply that journalists are people too – fallible, complacent people with their own interests and loyalties. Newstelling isn’t, and never can be, a science, no matter how hard we try to check our own biases.

The media isn’t so much a truth machine, but more of a story machine (Stephen Colbert might prefer the term ‘truthiness’). I’m not trying to invoke some kind of hysterical conspiracy theory – you can still probably believe what you read in most papers. But consider an article from The Daily Mail and an article from The Guardian covering the same issue – maybe neither article contains an outright fallacy. On a superficial level, they tell the same story. But what may be implied could differ entirely, depending on what quotes, sources, and pictures are used, as well as the tone and perspective of whoever wrote it.

So Fox News creates a 24-7 hype machine to effectively ‘sell’ a super-storm. Is that wrong?

The short answer is that it depends on your definition of ethics, but, for me, morality has to be something that can work in the 21st century, otherwise you’re just dreaming. Mass media does what it does, and we’re free to question it and expect the very highest quality of reporting, but what goes to print is usually what is also going to sell – ‘and that’s the way it is’, as Walter Cronkite would say.

Images: quicklingo.com, schoolnet.co.uk.

Fleeting Tweetings

Aisling Salter shows us the excesses of depravity those celebrities can sink to, and all with only 140 characters!

— Love it. Go

— Oh, and to remember to include the word ‘my’ in your sentences, Kimmie.

— Yikes! What do we get if we live? A retweet?

— I’m sure you’ve been called a lot worse dear.

— It would also be great if journos didn’t hack phones! Can’t win ’em all!

— A funny ginger man. There’s a first.

— Just another Tuesday night at the Perry household, eh?

— And the most organised tweeter award goes to…

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Images: twitter.com

by Ciara Kenny

Kids Say The Darndest Things: Communion Commotion

More Jedi Knight than child of Christ, Abigail Daisy Woods’ eight-year old sister is your new favourite person.

Last May, when I was smack bang in the middle of my final year exams, I had to put study on a standstill, take the weekend off work and make the trek home to Waterford for my eight year old sister’s Communion. Now this sister, the middle child (who you may remember me telling you in my last article would either end up being the CEO of a successful business or a mob boss) had a take on the whole ‘Communion thing’ like no child I have ever met before.

She treated the whole event as though it were some kind of business transaction to the disgust of my 11 year old sister who had made hers two years earlier. Such mentality was displayed by setting up a makeshift altar in her room and attending mass every week in an attempt to be as holy as possible. I know I have already established to you people how cool my siblings are but this really takes the biscuit.

I’ll start with the night before the Communion, when I arrived in the door after a two and a half hour car trip to be greeted by the embrace of the Communion girl and the words ‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAAABI, WHERE’S MY PRESENT?’. After forking over the Pandora charm I bought her, I was sent upstairs to read her a bedtime story. At this point my sister had a head full of hair rollers and in her nightgown and slippers looked more like Nora Batty than a child preparing for Communion. Just before putting her head down on the pillow she exclaimed just before saying her prayer at bedtime ‘I can’t wait to have dreams about counting my monaaaaaaaaaay’. That speech she had been articulating all year about ‘accepting baby Jesus’ love into your heart’ was completely neglected from the moment she realised the prospect of making more money than the tooth fairy could ever offer.

For the majority of the Communion, my brother and two sisters were pucking the heads off of one another. When it came to offering one another the sign of peace the Communion sister shook my hand and said ‘may the Force be with you’, leaving my family in tears of laughter. Just before my sister went up for Communion, the eleven year old whispered ‘You go girl, you accept the Holy Spirit’, slapping her on the back as she left the pew. As she arrived back from the big sacrament she shuffled her way across the pew high fiving my entire family as she returned to her seat. It soon came to the end of the mass where she said with a huge sigh of relief ‘thanks be to God’ (she’s just like us).

This was one of the most hilarious weekends of my life. It really has me asking myself if this up and coming generation are far cooler than my own or if I was just a hopeless dweeb of a child growing up. All I know for sure is that all these months later whenever I manage to get home for a 21st birthday party or what have you I always get a balled up ten or twenty euro note thrust into my hand in a ‘don’t spend it all in the one shop manner’ by an eight year old child.

Images: sthedwigbucktown.org, technabob.com

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The Pains of Being a Wallflower Tamara Malone talks about her experiences of The Fear – no, not that Fear: The Fear of Missing Out. I still remember my first night in Cork, in first year. I also remember the first week, and the first month. It’s not that hard, I pretty much spent every night of first year in the same way: at home.

Probably on the internet, watching others live their lives.

Starting college is never easy, but this is particularly the case when, like me, you suffer from social anxiety or extreme shyness (there we go – the most personal I’ve ever gotten on a public forum, ever). I remember sitting in front of Facebook and Bebo (still popular at the time, for whatever reason), studying, tiptoeing out to the kitchen for food, and sleeping. I also distinctly remember, particularly in the early months of the first term, reading countless articles in such publications as this. These articles, as well as the general consensus of university life – everyone from the SU officers to the Societies’ Guild and Clubs’ Executive – said the same. ‘Get involved’, go to class parties, join a club or society, run for class rep.

But God forbid that you don’t get involved, AT ALL. I remember reading even more countless times that ‘not getting involved’ was the number one regret of all those graduating. I so desperately wanted it to not be a regret of mine, and yet it seemed inevitable that it would be so.

Thanks to American TV, we are presented with the idea of college being a utopian world; one of the inclusivity of a fraternity (or sorority), beautiful old buildings and mansion houses, and parties all night, every night. The reality is that Irish college (and probably all college) is vastly different and, I would argue, better. So maybe, first year student, college isn’t everything you expected or hoped it would be. Maybe you feel disappointed. After all, we’re always told that it’s meant to be ‘the best time of our lives.’ A time during which we experience events that will stay in our memories when we’re old and grey, apparently; a time when life-long friends are made.

How can this expectation not take its toll on those of us who don’t go out every night? For those of us who enjoy occasionally chilling out in front of the TV or, God forbid, studying? My experience of college in first year I would never wish on anyone, but neither would I recommend succumbing to the pressure of creating memories or making new friends every time you leave the house.

The Fear of Missing Out (or FOMO as it is popularly called) is The New Problem of the 21st century. More than ever before, we as a people suffer, not from serious cases of depression or loneliness, but a general sense of unhappiness and dissatisfaction which pervades our consciousness. FOMO increases our jealousy and anger – a sense of not getting what one is entitled to – and lowers our self-esteem (‘why is someone else getting what I want? Obviously they’re better than me in some way’). FOMO is everywhere at the moment, but as far as I have encountered it, it seems mostly to be associated with social networking sites: Facebook, Twitter and Instagram – places where everyone can let the world know exactly what they’re doing, exactly as they do it. And while this is most definitely largely to blame for the undesirable phenomenon, I think it’s important to examine also the effect of other areas of life on our feelings of adequacy or inadequacy, as the case may be.

As university students of the 21st century, we are in a strange, unique world and a unique position. At a transitional period between being a teenager and an adult, we (for the most part) don’t have the 9-3:30/5 structure of either. We enter university as training for our careers and as a graduation from the demands of secondary school. We, the child-adults of the world, are both for the first time independent and at the same time utterly dependent (on the government, our parents and the fees office). We live what many could call a dream life; waking when we please and going out whenever we like, yet with a lot of political instability around the issue of third level fees, we are unsure of whether or not this can really last.

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Luckily, things have gotten better for me and, while I have friends, I no longer worry to death about holding onto them; though I go out now and then, I continue to relish nights in, perhaps even more! And, of course, I do recommend getting involved in some way: writing for the magazine you now hold in your hands is one of the best things I have ever done. During a particularly difficult period, seeing my name in print for the first time gave me a reason to be happy beyond measure. It’s something I had decided to do, and wanted to do, on my own initiative and without any outside pressure.

It’s still difficult to not feel that you’re wasting your youth, the best years of your life, even when having arrived at some level of contentment, but this dissatisfaction will probably always be present in our lives in some form or another from here on in. The best we can do is what feels right for us at all times, and if what feels right for you tonight is sitting in front of Game of Thrones for several hours, then so be it.

This week is Mental Health Week on campus. If you feel like you need someone to talk to, visit www.ucc.ie/en/studentcounselling/ for information on what counselling services are available to you, or consider Nightline, a confidential , non-judgemental, non-directive anonymous listening service, run by students for students.

Nightline operates every Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday night, from 9pm to 1am. Freephone 1800 32 32 42.

Images: deviantart.net, xarj.net.

Merry Novegan month! Senita Appiakorang is prepared to swap rashers for cashews this month,

and she explains why maybe we all should give the vegan philosophy a go.

Defeated by my incapacity to grow facial hair, owed to my anatomical difference to the male species (for which I am glad every other month of the year), I have been racking my brains for some self-improving activity to commit to for the month of November. While some of my female counterparts have adapted to growing their armpit hairs for Movember, and others have taken the ‘No(drink)-vember’ pledge, I have chosen something perhaps more ‘alternative’, but maybe more achievable. I’ve adopted a vegan diet, to explore the culinary world of vegans and bring awareness to the practice of Vegan Month which falls every November!

Vegan Awareness Month takes place not only to promote the ethos and benefits of being a vegan, even if only periodically, but also aims to shift the stigmas which surround veganism, by shedding some light on the dietary practice. Having grown up in a family of vegetarians, and having been taught to be mindful of the source and content of the food I eat, rethinking how one makes and substitutes certain nutrients isn’t alien to me, despite being a ravenous omnivore.

It is getting colder, and our inclination at this stage of the year is to stock up on munchies and comfort foods to thicken our skins for the dipping temperatures this season, however I challenge you to at the very least to maintain an open mind – veganism can really alter your thinking on ingredients, and stimulate a desire to be develop super-human levels of health and well-being.

(‘How to Make Cashew Cheese’).

This is the challenge of Vegan Month:

If you’re not going to wear hemp, grow dreadlocks and work for your lodgings in a Himalayan farm, why bother going vegan? Sure, I’m reinforcing a stereotype, but I’m only articulating what you might innately associate with this ‘extreme’ choice of diet. Well, veganism on a basic principle entails eating no meat, dairy produce or any other food that derives from an animal. A lot of the ethics behind it are similar to those associated with vegetarianism, as well as the politics of animal rights activism. Vegans would feel that we can survive quite well, and perhaps even better, without consuming animals, and that more wholesome, un-tampered and organic alternatives to animal produce exist in abundance. Such guidelines would also dictate what type of clothes they wear, for instance hemp, which is a variety of cannabis cultivated for fibre and seeds, as an alternative to cotton or wool attire. Leather would be altogether out of bounds for some vegans.

However, one should remember that there are varying degrees of extremity, and what may be a defining trait of the vegan doctrine for one person may be of less importance to another. Ultimately, one thing you can find across the board with all vegans is that health matters! That is the common thread that inspires the wide and exquisite array of creative methods of cooking which everyone should experience at least once, especially if you’re as inclined to food infatuations like as I am.

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Don’t immediately throw yourself into a heavy-weight vegan programme if you can’t afford to commit that much! There are several websites that elaborate and give good tips as how to introduce yourself to veganism gradually, or full throttle. They provide daily recipes, and you’ll find regular updates from vegans both veteran and virgin, detailing their successes and challenges. Some warn of the temporary ailments that may arise of cutting out your normal diet in favour of a vegan one, but they also espouse the many health improvements they’ve experienced.

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Stock up on vitamins, herbal teas and mineral substances like Floradix. This’ll ensure that you avoid the energy slump normally associated with undertaking a dietary make over, and you’re immune system will be less likely to take a beating.

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Layer up! You may find that you’re prone to feel colder because you’re eating foods of a lesser fat content. Make sure to eat foods like avocados with natural super fats which also give you the benefit of glowing skin and hair!

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BE PATIENT! Like any other lifestyle change it takes time to reap the rewards of this challenge. It may be far-fetched to expect super human results after two week of this – in fact, you certainly won’t! Veganism warrants patience in every aspect, as making the food itself can be very time consuming, but altogether rewarding.

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It’s ok if you falter occasionally and eat that tantalising chocolate bar, but make sure to recommit the next day!

Last but not least, we Corkonions are very privileged to have the only solely vegan restaurant in the country, a sanctuary of funky music and raw vegan chocolate vibes. It’s called Very Healthy Food and it’s on Douglas Street, right next door to that other night-time haven, Fionnbarra’s. Endeavour to pop in and check out their detox/vegan food plans; it’s a perfectly quaint place to watch the people of Cork pass by, and to feel those greens rejuvenate your every cell! Visit for contact details, prices and more.

Now that we’ve got some context: VEGAN MONTH! Yes, as I was saying: it’s Vegan Month, guys! An opportunity for you to reconceptualise the humble cheese sambo with, wait for it… cashew cheese! ‘Cashew cheese?’ you ask? Yes indeed; producing this delicacy involves soaking cashews and whichever other nuts may take your fancy in water for some hours and crushing it, adding whatever dairy-free vegan friendly ingredients you please. The results are simply divine and directions as to how to go about it can be found on blogs.babbl.com

Good luck!

For more information on Vegan Month, check out worldveganmonth.net, veganmofo.com and vegan-month.com For more details on Very Healthy Food (Douglas St.), visit veryhealthyfood.com.

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Image: menupages.ie, bp.blogspot.com

The Man Who Fell To Earth Mae McSweeney reviews the controversial, record-breaking Red Bull Stratos Jump, while simultaneously contemplating the many sandwiches that would be enriched by a nice country relish.

On the 14th of October 2012, Felix Baumgartner became the first person to jump from the edge of space. Even though a jar of Ballymaloe Country Relish did it first (YouTube it, I’m not wrong!), this is still a pretty big deal. Jars of relish, though important in a savoury, delicious, great-in-a-chicken-roll kind of way, are not human beings with blood that can boil up on entering the atmosphere. Not everyone can claim to have broken the sound barrier by falling. Before jumping from the balloon which floated 39 vertical kilometres above New Mexico, Felix quipped ‘sometimes you have to be really high, to see how small you really are’, a quote that will probably become this generation’s equivalent of ‘one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind’.

Yet amidst the sense of awe and excitement of the general public, one could be forgiven for being critical of the Red Bull Stratos Jump. After all, it was first and foremost a marketing strategy – I mean, talk about taking ‘Red Bull Gives You Wings’ to its logical conclusion. Red Bull designed the next generation pressurized balloon capsule and the fully-equipped pressure suit Baumgartner needed to break the exiting record of 31 kilometres, but there was a very distinct possibility that the subject of this massive campaign could be seriously, or even fatally, injured on descent.

You can question the ethics of sending an innocent Austrian sky-diver to his possible death, but the truth is that the Stratos Jump didn’t just benefit the suits at Red Bull – the exercise has yielded in a lot of relevant scientific data, which NASA has specifically asked to be kept informed of. The project has provided new data for the development of high-performance, high altitude parachute systems, and it is expected that the experiences gained will inform the development of new designs for emergency evacuation from spacecrafts passing through the stratosphere. Art Thomson, team principal for the Stratos Jump team, said this: ‘Part of this programme was to show high-altitude egress, passing through Mach [the sounds barrier] and a successful re-entry back [to subsonic speed], because our belief scientifically is that’s going to benefit future private space programmes or high-altitude pilots; and Felix proved that today’.

So, for all you haughty anti-corporate types: what do you think of that, eh? Science! Isn’t it great? To be honest, these pictures have my head spinning, I need to lie down. I’m going to make myself a toasted ham, cheese and relish sandwich, which may or may not be enjoyed with a certain bovine-themed caffeinated energy drink. (Other caffeinated energy drinks are available, always read the label, terms and conditions apply).

Images: RedBull.com

Motley wants you!

Motley is looking for contributors in each of the four sections of the magazine!

Current Affairs – currentaffairs@motley.ie Entertainments – entertainments@motley.ie Features – features@motley.ie Fashion – fashion@motley.ie We’re also taking submissions for uccmotley.ie – check out our website after the launch for more details!

Image: gustotheatre.com

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The Pits

In the spirit of Movember, Sarah McSweeney uses her razor sharp wit to ponder the age-old question: to shave or not to shave?

Mary didn’t shave her underarms yesterday, nor had she done the day before. She rushed to her lecture in one of those stuffy Booles, and since she’s nearing sweaty after flying down those steps, she removed her coat and jacket. She was wearing one of those cut off sleeve shirts, a long and vaguely see through one. She’s a fashionable girl, our Mary. A little bit late, she couldn’t quite keep up with whatever her lecturer was explaining.

Brave enough when it comes to speaking up, Mary raised her hand to ask a question.

STOP. What? Have you been paying attention? Mary’s got over three days’ worth of stubble going on there, under that arm. Most of the males and females of UCC I’ve spoken to over the past few weeks would take issue with Mary, baring all that fuzzed up sinewy flesh in public. ‘Mank’ or ‘expletively mank’ seems the general consensus.

There’s a lot that women do, and have ever done, in order to make themselves look artificially feminine, and therefore more attractive: heavily lidded eyes, fluttering eyelashes, rouged lips and cheeks.

Buff the skin, shave the skin, tan the skin, repeat ad infinitum. It’s all grand, I say - but all the time? There’s a pressure on women (more so on girls, and very much so on us college going females – us, somewhere in between, much like Britney when she sat on her rock in those ripped jeans) to spend a disgraceful amount of their weekly hours preening, plucking, and slathering.

Personally I don’t disagree with scrubbing oneself up. The pressure on woman to appear as close to perfect as they can afford, all the time, is reasonably often covered in the media and things like SPHE (Social, Personal and Health Education, remember?) in school. The pressure to draw several sharp blades over one of the most sensitive patches of skin on the body on a near daily basis generally isn’t mentioned.

A Dublin woman called Emer O’Toole has been making her way across daytime TV and women’s magazines, here and in the UK, over the last six months. She’s 28, not unattractive, and hasn’t shaved any part of her body in just over a year and a half. Her argument is that hair removal and body image are closely connected, and feeling the need to shave off those follicles is on a par with the pressure some poor ladies feel to get a breast implants, liposuction or (oh Christ) vaginoplasty. It’s not all the same, but it’s coming from the same warped idea of what exactly it is that defines a woman. I’m not sure if I’d be right up there on national TV with Emer O’Toole and an underarm tuft that would rival Alec Baldwin’s. I don’t see it necessary as drawing a line between being a shaver and being a non-shaver.

Mind you, no girl is going to make it on Ireland AM by leaving her pits go a week or two. To be honest, I like having smooth-ish underarms. But I like it in the same way I like wearing a strong red lipstick, and painting thick peachy plaster on my face. It’s all part of an act that people put on in order to court one another, or just to feel elevated from the mundane. It’s part of an act that I see right through, and disagree with, but even so I will take part and get excited about it. This might look like the downfall of my point, but it’s actually not. Leaving your underarms in their natural state once in a while shouldn’t mean making a statement. It doesn’t have to be about feminism, or sexual orientation, or non-conformism. It should just mean that you can be comfortable enough with your body, your womanhood, and not get freaked out by a little fuzz every now and again.

Images: samanthasteele.com, hairypitsclub.com, Zoomba Recording.

Under Arms, Under Arrest!

Mae McSweeney examines a selection of hussies – sorry – women who maliciously subjected their fans to the terror of 3-day growth.

Paris Hilton An heiress doesn’t have to be hairless, you know. Paris’ underarm 5 o’ clock shadow was unleashed on an unsuspecting public, as she waved her arms in the air like she just didn’t care at a nightclub back in 2008. You’d think she’d fork out for a razor, like.

Drew Barrymore A nation gasped and averted their eyes when a patch of auburn hair was spotted lurking in the depths of Drew’s unsuspecting armpits. How did it get there?

Was it planted by terrorists? Was it an omen of The Rapture?

Jesus… no wonder she’d Never Been Kissed? Guffaw.

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Julia Roberts A repeat offender, and perpetrator of the most heinous crime on the list: sporting a brazen thicket of follicles where no follicle ought be seen, on what should have been a wonderful, wholesome occasion – the London premiere of Notting Hill. Hugh Grant is still being treated for Post-Traumatic Stress disorder.

‘Are ya Well?’ The Power of Sleep

E Von Cheong daydreams about the mysterious benefits of naptime

As a medical student, I find myself constantly fascinated by the depth and breadth of science and how it is so intrinsically intertwined with our daily lives. Recently, we learned about the physiology of sleep and the extremely significant role it plays in our health. It was then that I asked myself - in our tenacity to fill the fissures of our lives with meaningful accomplishments and experiences, how much care and attention do we really pay to the basic things that contribute to our well-being? Given how important sleep is, why is it one of the first things people are always willing to sacrifice?

Perhaps it is due to our conjured perception that one or two hours of sleep deprivation can do no harm. However, the reality is that even a small amount of sleep deprivation can be detrimental. In the words of Dr. Charles A. Czeisler, Professor of Sleep Medicine at Harvard Medical School, ‘if they average four hours of sleep a night for four or five days, they develop the same level of cognitive impairment as if they’d been awake for 24 hours—equivalent to legal drunkenness. Within ten days, the level of impairment is the same as you’d have going 48 hours without sleep. This greatly lengthens reaction time, impedes judgment, and interferes with problem solving.’

To appreciate the significance of sleep, it is essential to review its underlying physiology. For centuries, sleep has been misperceived as an inactive state.

However, in 1929, an invention known as electroencephalogram enabled scientists to record the electrical activity of the brain. Since then, it was proven that sleep is a dynamic process and our brain is hard at work while we are sleeping.

Sleep is divided into two key phases - rapid-eye-movement (REM) and non– rapid-eye-movement (NREM) sleep. Sleep begins with the NREM state.

NREM sleep is further divided into four stages of sleep: onset (stage 1), light sleep (stage 2), and deep sleep (stages 3 and 4). After about 60 to 90 minutes, REM sleep sets in, lasting for approximately 20 to 30 minutes. Subsequently, NREM sleep returns to start a new sleep cycle. Typically, a healthy adult goes through four to six consecutive sleep cycles in one night.

So what are the possible implications of sleep deprivation?

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Diabetes

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High Blood Pressure

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Heart Disease

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Mental Illness

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Weight Gain

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Mortality

Benefits of Having Sufficient Sleep Sleep plays an important role in the consolidation of memory, which is pivotal for learning new information. Research suggests that memory consolidation takes place during sleep via the strengthening of the neural connections that form our memories.

It has long been known that a good night’s sleep reinforces the day’s memories, transferring them from short-term storage into long-term holding. However, it is helpful only if you explicitly tell yourself you’ll need the information in the future. In other words, don’t expect eight hours of shut-eye to help you on a pop quiz. Using EEGs, scientists at the University of Lübeck in Germany found out that the ‘test is coming’ group spent more time in deep sleep than did the group not anticipating a test. Slow electrical waves act as a replay button, causing the hippocampus to reactivate new memories and synchronizing the neocortex so that the memories are stored in the long-term memory bank.

This expectant group also had more ‘sleep spindles,’ bursts of electrical activity that prime networks in the cortex to store memories arriving from the hippocampus and to integrate them into existing knowledge, facilitating retrieval.

Since sleep deprivation alters immune function, including the activity of the body’s killer cells and causes a string of diseases, having sufficient sleep may also help fight cancer and keep us healthy.

What can we do to get Better Sleep?

Here are some suggestions from Oprah’s buddy Dr. Oz.

Sleep deprivation slows our metabolism and raises our cortisol level. Cortisol is a stress hormone that increases cravings for foods high in fat and carbohydrate. Increased level of cortisol is linked to insulin resistance, a risk factor for both diabetes and obesity. When we are sleep-deprived, our body produces more ghrelin, the hormone which increases hunger, and less of the hormone leptin, which helps prevents overeating. Plus, those who are not getting at least 7 hours of sleep every night are losing precious REM sleep, the stage where you burn the most calories! The effects of sleep deprivation may not be immediate or direct. But think about all the tragic road accidents caused by drivers who fell asleep at the wheel. The causal link between sleep deprivation and mortality is real.

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Dim the lights. The blue light from laptops, TV and cell phones suppresses the secretion of melatonin, a sleep-promoting hormone.

Read a book instead of watching TV just before bed. Place an orange light bulb in our bedside lamp; its glow lets us read or relax without actively inhibiting melatonin.

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Don’t go to bed hungry. A growling, empty stomach makes it harder to fall asleep, and that can derail our diet.

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Slip on some socks. A study published in the American Journal of Physiology in 2000 suggests that wearing socks to bed keeps the blood vessels in our feet dilated, drawing blood away from our core and cooling us off, which initiates sleep.

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Time workouts right. Combined with a regular bedtime routine, exercising four times a week may increase our overall sleep time by 1.25 hours each night, according to a recent study published in the journal Sleep Medicine.

Considering how important it is, sleep should no longer be deemed as an expendable luxury. It is an integral part of our lives and an easy way to keep us healthy and whole!

Image: manualredeye.com, artandphilanthropy.com

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Full of Beans Do you find it hard to get by without your morning cup of Joe? Gavin Fitzgerald explores why that might not be such a bad thing after all.

Being Irish, we are known the world over for having a particular interest in certain beverages. Of course, these certain beverages are of the alcoholic variety and there is no denying that drinking is as much part of the Irish stereotype as pots of gold, little dancing men and living in Hobbit holes. Sometimes it’s nice; it breaks the ice when you’re abroad and someone hears that soft melodic brogue of yours, before suddenly exclaiming, ‘Wow, are you from IRRRRRRRRRReland?’

Before you know it, they have already bought you a pint and you’re telling them all about The Troubles (which you know only the gist of), and which they will most certainly forget by the time that pint glass is emptied.

But is there another drink us Irish might be known for? Of the caffeinated variety? And I’m not talking about tea, which, while popular with the Irish, has always been associated with the English – what else could one sup upon as accompaniment to a toasted crumpet? I am talking instead about the new kid on the block – coffee.

According to KaffeInformation.se, in 2008 the total annual consumption of coffee in Ireland was approximately 115,000 bags. By 2010 this had increased to 156,500 bags. The statistics speak for themselves, and though I was unable to find data for 2011 or 2012, I can’t imagine that there’s been a significant downturn in consumption in the interval years. To pare it down to one sentence: Ireland has become a massive fan of coffee, and it is fast becoming the first choice social lubricant over which we can chatter and gossip, laugh and pout, commend and complain. And with the immense diversity of drinks under the umbrella title ‘coffee’, there’s one which appeals to each of us.

You can choose from Americano, Espresso, Latte, Cappuccino, Café au Lait, Caffe Macchiato, Caffe Mocha, Caffe Breve, and many possible derivatives of each. Various beans are sourced from all over the globe – Brazil, Colombia, Honduras, Peru, and Mexico, along with Asian countries like Vietnam and India; and African countries, among them Ethiopia and Uganda. As for the outlets, they have been constantly springing up in the last few years and one could list them all day: Starbucks, Insomnia, Costa, BBs, Nosh, Cafe Gusto, Cork Coffee Roasters, Badger and Dojo to name some.

So I wonder, what does this mean? Why are so many people getting wired on coffee lately? Perhaps productivity has something to do with it seeing as it is proven that the caffeine in coffee keeps our brains alert and receptive of new information. That kind of perk tends to help with cramming before tests, or in a busy post-Celtic economy where employees may find themselves putting in more and more work hours for less pay.

And what about health? According to a Harvard researcher who led a study on 20,000 people, regular coffee drinkers have about one third less asthmatic symptoms than those of non-coffee drinkers. In the situation of an emergency onset of asthma, drinking caffeinated coffee can allow the patient to breathe more easily, and drinking coffee is regularly recommended by doctors. Coffee has also been proven to help lower risk of developing type 2 diabetes and cancer, while offering the benefits of reduction of strokes and of cardiovascular disease.

In the case of coffee, the benefits far outweigh the risks.

Yet, while there are the performance and health benefits, maybe people just prefer having a coffee to having a round of drinks. I personally maintain that this is the case. Think about it – a cosy atmosphere, leather chairs, music and Wi-Fi, that feeling of sophistication associated with the aromatic beverage. Coffeehouses, or at least the smart and successful ones, are creating places where we like to retreat between work and home. It’s that third place in your life where you can, for a time, relax.

People appreciate the social and open ambience, and the artistic appeal. It’s a place where stories are shared and thoughts are evoked. It is human connectivity, over the slow steam issuing from the cups we hold. It makes the mornings more bearable, and all the waiting too; the meetings you don’t want to attend, the appointments you dread having, the time spent waiting for the bus home after a day filled with lectures and tutorials.

It is a thing I tend to fall back on. A good cup of coffee can, for a time, make everything stand still and create a moment for you to gather your thoughts. It allows you the moment of reprieve before you take a deep breath, and get ready to challenge the grind once more.

There is no denying its growing popularity in this country. While the phrases ‘putting on the kettle’ and ‘go for a round’ are never going to die out, we must all agree that the question ‘care for a coffee?’ is looking to become every bit as ubiquitous, and maybe it is for the better.

Images: swimwearshack.com.au, consuminglouisville.com.

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Why the 1960s Were a Bit Shit Resident kill-joy Mae McSweeney is here to ruin everyone’s nostalgia trip by laying down some hard, cold facts about the Swinging Sixties Upon hearing that this month’s Motley was to have a retro theme, needless to say I squeezed into my platform booties, dug out my fondue set from the attic and got hip to groove of the… oh God, I can’t! I just can’t pretend to dig the sixties, man. Or rather, I can’t see that decade through the same rose-tinted Jackie Onassis sunglasses as everyone else does. Come gather round people wherever you roam – and listen to my whiney song of protest. Here are some of the conveniently ignored facts about the 1960s. Groovy.

1. It was actually pretty violent.

So you’re all familiar with the concepts of Flower Power, The Summer of Love, and a general consensus that the 1960s were a peaceful age, when young people were too concerned with turning on, tuning in and dropping out to get involved in anti-social behaviour? Well, it was also an era of massive increases in crime rates across the United States – between 1960 and 1969, reported incidences of violent crime per 100,000 people in the United States nearly doubled, and have never since returned to the levels of the early 60s.

Forget about The Byrds and The Sound of Music, and think more about Allen Ginsberg’s Howl, Hunter S. Thompson’s Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas and Ralph Ellison’s Invisible Man. Less tiedyed hemp, more peyote-fuelled insanity. The massive increase in crime statistics was due in part to widespread riots, as the initially non-violent civil rights movement became radicalized, and even militarised, with the foundation of groups such as the Black Panthers. Notable wars fought in this period include the Vietnam War, the Cold War, and intense conflict over the Pakistan-India border. Oh yes, and remember the Cuban Missile Crisis? Kumbaya, my ass.

Let’s not forget that the late 1960s is considered as the start of The Troubles, an era of secular tension and conflict in Northern Ireland which lasted until 1998. Terrorist bombings across the island of Ireland and in Britain were a real and pervasive threat for many.

You can argue that revolutionary movements like these and many more which took place in freshly decolonised nations around the world were a necessary process, where oppressed people fought hard to have their human rights recognised – but to romantically lament the passing of a bygone era of protest songs and peace rallies is to ignore the genuine fear and hatred felt by many at the time.

2. Stupid Clothes Look, I’m as much of a vintage clothing enthusiast as the next middle-class, college-educated, blog-writing, New Girl–loving twenty-something. But some of the clothes from the 60s were fucking stupid. Nylon is not a breathable fabric. I mean, we’ve all seen Austin Powers, right? Fair enough, it’s a comedy, but it’s not some absurd surrealist nightmare (well…). As in, people actually did wear knee-high PVC boots. And really shapeless floral smocks. And paisley. Menfolk sported Aran jumpers, tweed bell-bottoms, and really wide, hideous ties. If none of this sounds too awful, consider that they didn’t have the privilege of being post-modern or ironic about it in the same way we do.

Also! To all the girls on Tumblr who like to attribute dubious ‘real women are curvy’ quotes to Marilyn Monroe, who wish they were born into an era where you didn’t have to be skinny: just know that the 1960s wasn’t entirely forgiving of fuller figures. Ladies with Joan Holloway-esque curviness were celebrated, until Twiggy’s, eh, twigginess, became the desirable body shape. Popular weight loss methods of the time included smoking lots of fags and snacking on amphetamines. Just ask Bob Dylan!

3. Everyone was a lot more gullible You know how it’s easy to get angry at modern corporations for bombarding us with advertisements literally all the time? We see ads on the sides of buses, hear them on the radio, and have them pop up on every website. But, you’d like to think that the twentyfirst century consumer has a bit more sense than to follow every promotional rainbow to the promised pot of gold.

Fifty years ago, marketers could get away with anything. Cigarettes kept you slim, healthy and sexy. Tinned roast beef hash was a delicious foodstuff. And that old chestnut, ‘Guinness is good for you!’ was still being touted back then. If you were born in the 1960s, there’s probably a high chance that your mother smoked or drank during her pregnancy – because no one knew that was a bad thing.

You could say that this is a straw man argument – obviously this generation benefits from more discoveries in health and science than our parent’s generation. I’m not standing here saying, ‘LOL, you guys didn’t have the Internet, y’all must have pretty stupid!’

I’m making this point because the 1960s is thought of as a catalyst decade for thought and enlightenment, and in many respects it is. Ingrained attitudes towards race, sexuality, religion and morality began to shift, and by the early 70s, many aspects of ‘counterculture’ thought had become mainstream in America and Europe.

For me, though, it’s a bit like when people say, ‘you know there was music before The Beatles?’ There was independent thought, cool music, astonishing poetry, iconic fashions and radical political upheaval before the 60’s, and there always will be. On a finishing note, any history buffs who took the time to read this and found glaring errors in my research – what would you know anyway? YOU WEREN’T EVEN THERE, MAN! Peace out.

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Images: Chesterfield, iofferphoto.com, Pathé.

The Spoofer’s Guide to… Quantum Mechanics (Putting the sh**te in Zeiteist)

Gearoid Holland is about to get sub-atomic on all your asses.

You’ve heard of the bluffer’s guide on how to talk at length about things you know nothing about? Well, The Spoofer’s Guide is about to undermine those bluffers by demonstrating an ‘understanding’!

Other groups have also tried to discredit the Schrodinger’s Cat experiment by pointing out obvious holes in its supposed logic, such as:

The Schrodinger’s Cat Experiment

•

According to most erudite textbooks on quantum mechanics, Schrodinger’s Cat is a hypothetical thought experiment, demonstrating by analogy that subatomic particles can have more than one state, until those particles are observed.

If the box is air-tight (to prevent any sounds that might give a clue as to whether the cat is still alive, and thus ruin the experiment) then the cat probably suffocated to death within several minutes of being put in the box.

•

Anybody that had read Marvel Comics knows that exposing a living creature with a lousy temper to a large dose of radiation does not necessarily kill the creature, but just causes it to mutate into an even angrier larger creature (with a distinctly green suntan). The end result of that experiment is that it does not end well for the scientist performing it.

The experiment has a number of variations, but generally involves a scenario whereby a cat is locked in a box which also contains some life-threatening object (usually a radioactive isotope).

The dual-nature principle is explained along the lines of: •

Until the box is opened, the cat can theoretically be either dead or alive (or any combination of possibilities in between) but as soon as the box is opened, there is only one possibility.

However the most significant flaw in the theory was identified by a delusional heretic called Gearoid Holland who posed the question: •

How the hell could anybody possibly manage to get a snarling ball of fluffy terror and pentup rage with razor-sharp claws into a small dark cramped confined space in the first place? ... now that’s theoretical physics!!!

The quantum mechanics community have yet to respond ... possibly due to still being in a coma from their last attempt to perform the experiment.

Related Principles

The hazards of a thought experiment … will the madness never end?

Resistance to the Theory The experiment has been widely condemned by animal welfare organisations such as PETA who claim that the experiment is nothing more than a flimsy excuse to play the family boardgame ‘Mousetrap’, but using living creatures as tokens to move around the board, while adding pieces to a kinetic (‘domino effect’) trap that is far more cruel and unusual than that envisaged by the board game makers back in 1963.

This is after all the same scientific community that somehow found out (through some form of experimentation) that if a cat is thrown out a skyscraper window it takes the cat several floors to work out that it is falling upside down, and then right itself so that it lands on its feet.

For more information on how a cat’s innate ‘righting reflex’ has been abused for entertainment value by the scientific community, you can read about the buttered cat paradox on Wikipedia.

The thought experiment is related to Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle which states that: •

Every particle has two qualities: (i) where a particle currently is and (ii) where it is going.

According to Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle, it is not possible to know both of these details simultaneously. This is due in part to the fact that the simple action of observing the particle (thus imparting light waves to it) would affect one or both of the above factors --- thus affecting the result.

This theory held sway for many years within the quantum mechanics community until some insignificant miscreant called Gearoid Holland pointed out that Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle was not an original concept at all... because most students (especially those under 18) regard that particular set of circumstances as a typical Saturday night out.

The Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences has as yet declined to strip Werner Heisenberg of his 1932 Nobel Prize for Physics. However, a very stern letter has been sent by Gearoid’s aunt to her local TD, so get your reservations in early for the official renaming of the Boole Library in favour of its soon-to-become-globally-most-infamous member of the UCC alumni!

Images: joueurdugrenier.fr, charliedwyer.com, dilbert.com.

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Shell’s Kitchen Shell Leonard wards off November nippiness with a selection of treats to warm your aching bones. Best enjoyed on the couch, beside a roaring fire, in a Snuggie (hot water bottle optional).

So the weather is changing, and we all need to feel warm and cosy on these chilly evenings. I’ve put together some of my favourite comfort food for the winter times ahead.

Homemade Hot Chocolate (serves 4) * 100g milk chocolate * 140ml of double cream * 500 ml of milk

Optional

* 1tsp of chilli OR * Handful of Marshmallows for serving.

Process

Simply place all the ingredients in the pot and continuously stir while bringing to the boil. Add extra chocolate if you wish!

Honeycomb /Homemade Crunchies. * 10tbsp of sugar * 4tbsp of golden syrup * 2tsp of baking powder Optional *Milk chocolate for serving

Process

Melt sugar and golden syrup in a bad saucepan (this is a very tricky recipe, don’t jeopardise your finest pan).

Use a silicon spatula to stir the mixture constantly. NEVER touch the mixture as it will be extremely hot.

Chocolate Mousse

Stir for up to five minutes until it looks clear and bubbly. The bubbles are important for the density of the honeycomb.

Take the mixture off the heat. Quickly add 2tsp of baking powder and stir quickly and use spatula to pull the mixture on to a tray (this process must happen within 30 seconds of adding the baking powder or else the mixture will harden in the pot).

Leave to set for a few minutes until cooled and solid.

Use a heatproof bowl over a saucepan of boiling water to melt the chocolate.

* 2 large bars of Dairymilk * 4 eggs, separated * 142ml double cream

Process Melt the chocolate in a heatproof bowl over a saucepan full of boiling water.

Add the four egg yolks to the chocolate mix and combine.

Use a cooking tong dip the chunks of honeycomb in the chocolate.

Lightly whip the cream and add to the mix.

Whisk the egg whites until they have soft peaks, and become a white colour instead of clear.

Combine the mix together and leave to set in the fridge for 2 hours.

Bon Appetit!

Images: Shell Leonard

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The Raven ‘Did you hear about...?’

by Laura Marie Whelton

Crawling inside myself, These afternoons of others comforts. These tea cup tirades, Tiresome parades, For others approval. To stoke their loins, Sucking coins.

Licking notions, talking, Without pause. And all the while We cloak our daggers, Seethe in shadows. Breathing affluence, Sticking in claws. Old hills tipping out people, On this, Forgot to remember me. All too often. Despise these lies, Lip- stick coated style. Rotten youth, Too oft denied. Hitched up skirts for Their neighbour’s desserts. Choking on the stone, Cherry on top, polluted chrome.

Stranger Than Fiction •

In 1843, a Parisian street mime got stuck in his imaginary box and consequently died of starvation.

•

Alexander Graham Bell, the inventor of the telephone, never telephoned His wife or mother because they were both deaf.

‘The Old Mirror’ – Peter Neville It had always been there on the wall of my grandmother’s house, and since childhood it had always terrified me. The deep, gauging scars it bore of previous battles; the glass slightly warped with age; and, of course, there was no escaping the fact that it was a famine piece. The house itself, a small thatched cottage in the countryside, had a very peaceful feeling to it despite living through the most negative episodes of the television programme which is Ireland.

Behind it was an old, beaten and worn out road that boasted more dust than gravel. It didn’t lead anywhere. In those days, it was a means of getting food and, what’s more, it didn’t need a destination. As a child, the house always gave me shivers- as if its personality presenting a shy hello as we arrived. Of course, we weren’t the first children in the house- we estimated that over fifteen generations had been brought up in the house. And, undoubtedly, they died in the house.

Mirrors always had the ability to freak me out, and this one was no exception.

In fact, now that I think back, it was this very mirror that first made me horrified to set eyes upon reflected glass. When my brother was small he used to be certain that his soul was on the other side- his dark thoughts and intentions waiting to reveal themselves. And as a sceptic, I always laughed these ideas away. I realise now how foolish I was…

It was a Saturday evening in the middle of November when I first saw her. That face. Those eyes. That…. impossibility. Although it was only five or six o’clock, outside was already dark with that deep, inescapable blackness that comes with country nights. Tendrils of cold and night had wrapped their bony, claw-like hands around the house, and it was on this eve that my grandmother decided to tell me about the girl.

“She was the same age as you are now when she died. Poor thing, she was engaged to be married and as her body faded away from hunger, he still stayed by her side. Sometimes, I’m not sure that she ever really left this house.”

With that, she got up and left me alone in the sitting room- the original part of the house. The oldest part of the house- the part that hadn’t been renovated with the rest. The room itself had an odd feeling to it- I don’t know whether it was the old bookcase, the thick walls of the window or the battered mirrorbut it always made me uncomfortable. Standing up to leave, I broke one of my traditions and caught a glimpse of myself in that cracked and tormented glassthe glass which had seen so much death and suffering, yet could do nothing to help. If it had a soul, it would have been fragmented with grief.

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There she was. A young girl- pretty, small and exceptionally pale- wearing a simple dress, and reviewing her reflection in the mirror. She looked sickly, with little signs of life in her face and yet… she was moving. Her pastel hand with its soft unaging skin, gently brushing the hair from her face and tying it back behind her ear. For a second, I did nothing but observe. I could not accept it. For I did not believe in ghosts, although I always felt there was something sinister about mirrors. Thoughts flashed furiously. Look back- get a better look. No! Don’t look back- if you look back, she will be gone.

Seconds ticked quickly by, and she stayed behind me, oblivious to my being. Thirty seconds. Forty-five seconds. Sixty seconds. All the time, she repeated the same motion of sweeping the hair to one side; and moving closer to the mirror. If she had breath in her lungs, it would have been rolling down my neck. She repeated the action seventeen times, her expression never changing; the movements never varying. And then, she smiled. A dead smile- one that I pray you never see; and her focus changed to me.

Quickly I spun on the spot, unable to control my fear any longer, and I faced an old bookcase- nothing else. I was alone. Or at least I believed so.

Turning back, I glanced at the mirror- at the newly scrawled writing on its surface. Seemingly carved with...fingernails.

A message. A series of numbers: 120407 And she was gone. Her face haunted me sometimes when I couldn’t sleep. And those numbers- seemingly random. Little did I know then that was the date my grandmother would die.

Image: extraordinaryintelligence.com.

Retro

fashion

Coat: Penneys €40 Cashmere Jumper: Topshop €68 Poloneck: Gap €19 Leather Skirt: Warehouse €52 Black Heels: River Island €67 Earrings: Mercury Goes Retrograde €3

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Wool Coat: River Island €94 Crop Top: Topshop €15 Midi Skirt: Mercury Goes Retrograde €20 Nude Heels: River Island €67

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Silk Shirt: River Island €47 Silk Skirt: Penneys €13

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Varsity Jacket: Turquoise Flamingo €55 Black High Waisted Jeans: Topshop €61 Cotton Tshirt: Topshop €27 Leopard Print Pumps: Penneys €9 Pearl Earrings: Mercury Goes Retrograde €3

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Silk Trousers: Mercury Goes Retrograde €17 Scallop Trim Tank: Amity €39 Nude Heels: River Island €67 Necklace: Penneys €5 Necklaces (on mannequin): Amity €24

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Coat: Amity €190 Poloneck: Gap €19 Black Heels: River Island €67 Earrings: Mercury Goes Retrograde €3 Bag: Mercury Goes Retrograde €12

4545

Dress: River Island €160 Sequin Clutch: Penneys €10 Black Heels: River Island €67 Earrings: Mercury Goes Retrograde €3

Shoot Credits Photographer: Egle Laukyte Sarganova (White Cat Studio).

Fashion by: Aisling Fitzpatrick and Emma Oliver.

Model: Meghan O’Donnell.

Hair: Origin Hair Design.

Makeup: Aoife O’ Callaghan @ Benefit Debenhams.

Shot on location with thanks to Amity, French Church Street.

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fashion@motley.ie

facebook.com/MotleyMagazine

The 1960s Live On! Nicole Clinton details the Sixties’ most influential fashion creations and examines how they have inspired this season’s trends.

The 1960s were a schizophrenic age. The generation gap that had appeared with the birth of rock ’n‘ roll in the ’50s grew wider day-by-day, and armies of youth were readying themselves to rebel against everything from wars to civil rights. The world of music saw the prolific introduction of The Beatles and The Rolling Stones, and just as the influence of these bands lives on today, the legacy of revolutionary fashion trends of the ’60s can be observed in this season’s collections.

Leopard print coats, dresses and accessories seem to be deeply embedded into the Autumn/Winter collections of Bershka and H&M. However, this trend found its origin in the wardrobe of fashion icon, and famous First Lady of the 1960s, Jaclyn Onassis Kennedy. Jackie hired designer Oleg Cassini as her couturier to create outfits that would please the First lady’s appearances for the American public. Since then, leopard has been printed on just about every item of clothing possible. Although Kat Moon may have given it a bad reputation in recent years, a leopard faux-fur coat is still the perfect blend of classy and feisty!

It’s undeniable the blazer has been a constant staple on the catwalks of every designer in recent years.

But the tuxedo jacket was first introduced by designer Yves Saint Laurent in 1966. The ‘Le Smoking’ pantsuit was a revolutionary launch of a blazer with trousers tailored to flatter the female figure, and was intended to be worn in the same formal setting as a skirt or dress. The androgynous styles of today did not exist before the 1960s so this was a major development in the world of fashion. Fast forward 46 years, and the blazer is available in every print and colour imaginable.

Judging by recent collections, it seems military style fashion is marching its way back onto the catwalks this season. This look is, of course, characterised by double-breasted coats, oversize gold buttons, high collars and indulgent royal colours. Inspired by traditional British and Hungarian ‘Hussar’ uniforms, this trend first emerged in the ’60s as a result of London hipsters love of second hand shopping. The Mod culture trawled the vintage stalls of London’s famous street markets to discover previously owned military wear. By wearing the pieces that represented the government’s restrictive ideals, Mods were fashionably rebelling against the authorities.

This rebellious attitude became a crucial ingredient in the sartorial choices made by the youth of the ’60s. This season, military styles are updated and many shops are channelling the trend as a hybrid of the current Baroque movement.

Warehouse Military Jacket €55

Topshop Blazer €75

It’s difficult today to think of the mini-skirt as a trend rather than a wardrobe staple. However, the mini first emerged in 1964. Apparently introduced by French designer André Courréges, the skirt was such an outrageous idea at the time that it was not featured in any stores that season. British designer Mary Quant was the first to give the new hemline a name (after her favourite car the ‘Mini’), providing the necessary marketing to reach the mainstream. She introduced it to the Mod generation, eager to push the boundaries of fashion.

Needless to say, the trend erupted and the mini-skirt remains the 1960’s most influential style creation. This season, the mini has appeared on the high street in beaded and heavily embellished forms, often referencing Isabel Marant’s aztec prints.

Get the Swinging Sixties Beauty Look 1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

Brush white eye shadow all over the lid from lash to brow.

Apply black liquid liner close to the upper lashes. Thicken the line up towards the outer corner and extend it upwards.

At the inner corner, thin the line out to a slim point extending towards the nose.

The same liquid liner can also be applied along the lower lashes in a line which tapers off at both ends to a thin and elegant point.

Next use a black or dark grey eye shadow with a small damp brush to thicken and slightly soften the socket line.

Coat the upper and lower lashes in black mascara.

Use a pale, natural looking lipstick or gloss on the lips as this look is all about the eyes.

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Images: topshop.com, prshots.com, lastfm.com.

The Icons

As icons of the 1960s, they became catalysts for social and cultural change in the fashion industry and beyond.

Aisling Fitzpatrick explores the enduring influence of the swinging sixties.

The Designer: Mary Quant In 1960s London, Mary Quant’s boutique Bazaar on Kings Road was the only place for any self-respecting fashionista to shop. The designer is credited by many for popularising, if not inventing two of fashion’s most controversial items of clothing: the mini skirt and hot pants.

Love them or hate them, its undeniable that Quant was instrumental in developing the mod subculture. Her clothes were made up of simple silhouettes and bold colours and regularly provoked outrage from conservative society. Buoyed by her success among the teenage generation however, Quant began to develop her aesthetic further, designing shift dresses, and plastic knee high boots, items that defined the era.

The Editor: Diana Vreeland Defining the meaning of style for a new generation, Diana Vreeland invented the concept of a fashion editor in the 1960s. Vreeland can be credited with completely transforming the monotonous pages of Vogue and Harper’s Bazaar, once reserved for New York’s high society, instead delivering a revolutionary take on fashion. The editor thrived in 1960s culture, embracing the new sexual revolution and introducing new icons to the fashion world. Vreeland was renowned for her flamboyance and tyrannical attitude, characteristics that eventually led to her dramatic dismissal from Vogue in 1971. Her legacy was already established by then however, with many industry insiders crediting Vreeland’s lasting influence on the fashion industry today. A recent documentary, The Eye Has to Travel, directed by Vreeland’s great-granddaughter, charts her dramatic personal life as well as her career at Vogue throughout the ’60s.

The Model: Jean Shrimpton With her waifish figure and wide doe eyes, Shrimpton is often dubbed the world’s first supermodel (sorry Janice Dickinson). This middle class English schoolgirl became the embodiment of the swinging sixties, offering the fashion industry a complete departure from the voluptuous models who dominated the previous decade. Her relationship with the notorious David Bailey garnered plenty of headlines, and was documented

by Karen Gillan in BBC drama We’ll Take Manhattan earlier this year. Shrimpton also had trend setting powers akin to our very own Kate Moss; legend has it that when the model arrived at a society event in Melbourne wearing a mini skirt, conservative circles were appalled and promptly asked her to leave. Nevertheless, a trend was born.

The Muse: Jane Birkin From models such as Veruschka and Twiggy, to it-girls like Anita Pallenberg and Catherine Denueve, it’s difficult to pick just one muse, however the woman for whom Hermès named their famed bag has certainly earned her icon status. With her gap-teeth and startlingly innocent beauty, the actress exuded an unabashed sensuality that stole the hearts of countless men throughout the ’60s. Birkin managed to combine the rebellious nonchalance of British mod culture with effortless Parisian style in a way that makes Alexa Chung and Kate Moss look like complete amateur. Her marriage to Serge Gainsbourg produced one of the era’s most prolific songs, and, more importantly, their daughter Charlotte, a style icon for our own generation.

The Photographer: Richard Avedon It’s no coincidence that Richard Avedon’s images have become synonymous with 1960s fashion.

The photographer pioneered the use of simplicity, always ensuring the focus of a picture was the emotion and feeling being portrayed. Some of the most definitive images from this decade are Avedon’s work; generations of models have leapt across simple backgrounds in the hopes of recreating a fraction of the photographer’s genius. His influence today is undoubted; just look at some of Steven Meisel’s work and it quickly becomes clear that Avedon is still very much an authority in fashion photography.

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Images: style.com, fashion156, stylist.co.uk, oystermag.com, Getty Images, Victoria and Albert Museum.

MENSWEAR

The Style Imperative

Robert Redford

Aisling Fitzpatrick discusses the timeless style of past, present and future style icons.

David Bowie

With the remake of The Great Gatsby hitting cinemas later this year, Robert Redford is sure to make a return to the top of best dressed lists. Dressed from head to toe in Ralph Lauren, the original Jay Gatsby oozed charisma and charmed his way into the hearts of the fashion industry during the 1960s. Redford has earned his place on the list thanks to his fearless approach to tailoring. Never afraid to accessorise a look, the actor combined a timeless bourgeois attitude with a healthy dose of confident swagger.

It’s no coincidence that the name David Bowie has become synonymous with fashion. Emerging as a definitive icon in the late 1970s, Bowie’s influence on the fashion world is still evident today. He was the first performer to truly break away from convention and create his own outlandish sartorial identity, and Madonna and Lady Gaga regularly cite him as inspiration in their own wardrobe choices.

Michael Caine Throughout the 1960s, Michael Caine exuded classic and refined personal style, a welcome change from the emerging hipster movement. Whilst other actors made sartorial choices designed to shock, Caine developed a penchant for tailoring, employing the imitable Mr Douglas Hayward to achieve the desired cut. Take inspiration from Caine’s character in Alfie to create a look that is equally relevant today.

A well cut suit is the most important investment in a man’s wardrobe, and simple accessories like good quality leather loafers can elevate the look.

River Phoenix If ever a man existed to rival Johnny Depp in the cool stakes, River Phoenix was the ultimate contender. An ultimate ’90s icon, Phoenix has come to represent all that embodies grunge. With his tattered jeans, plaid shirts and obligatory round sunglasses he influenced legions of hipsters around the world with his devil may care attitude. His tragically early death outside Depp’s infamous Viper Room in LA sadly deprived the world of a fashion icon.

Steve McQueen I tried my hardest to omit Steve McQueen from this list, if only to avoid being predictable, however it really is impossible to argue with his impeccable sense of style. Dubbed ‘the King of Cool’ by Hollywood in the 1960s, McQueen pioneered American sportswear. With his good looks and passion for motor racing, he was loved by men and women alike. His marriage to Ali MacGraw simply heightened his icon status. We’ve seen the return of the Wayfarer in recent years, but channel McQueen with a pair of Persol sunglasses instead to add a distinctive twist to your look.

Joseph Gordon Levitt

Mick Jagger A countdown of men’s style icons simply wouldn’t be complete without mentioning a member of The Rolling Stones, and Jagger has proven himself to be perhaps the most enduring style icon of them all. Looking at the singers conquests, it’s obvious that he’s a hit with the female audience, but it’s interesting to note that his appeal is not an overt masculinity. With his skinny frame and long shaggy hair, the frontman was a far cry from stereotypical icons of his time. Combining a 1970s disco look with his rebellious attitude, Jagger somehow emerged as a legitimate style icon. Sex, drugs and rock and roll were all hallmarks of Jagger’s signature style, and his influence on the music industry today is undeniable.

Bob Dylan Throughout his career Dylan proved to be a sartorial chameleon, allowing his music to influence his clothing. Often cited as the original hipster, he pioneered a look that today is popular among Julian Casablancas, Alex Turner and Luke Pritchard to name a few. When Dylan abandoned his folk roots to play with a full electric band, his personal style continued to grow in popularity.

Recreate the look with a simple black leather jacket and classic Wayfarers.

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A modern muse, Levitt’s style has certainly matured since he first appeared on our screens in 3rd Rock from the Sun. Now, the Californian actor has mastered the fine art of casual dressing, without looking scruffy. Well cut blazers and simple layers have proven to be a winning combination for Levitt, and he wisely chooses not to stray too far from these staples. His look can easily be achieved on a college budget. High street shops such as H&M and Topman offer a range of classic blazers at affordable prices. Experiment with different prints and coloured accessories to amp this look up a notch.

Tinie Tempah GQ’s Best Dressed Man of 2011 has managed to bring a touch of urban back into men’s fashion in recent years. With a penchant for luxury brands, Tinie has pioneered an experimental, fashion forward look since he burst onto the music scene. Looking at his recent outfit choices, it’s clear that the rapper is influenced by ‘80s street-style. Luckily, you can easily replicate Tinie’s look. In April this year he launched his debut menswear collection, ‘Disturbing London’, which is available online. Prices start at €35 and have a distinctive urban feel.

The Great Fashion Debate

Sarah Commane explores the idea of retro and vintage fashion and how these concepts are influencing the way we shop.

This article began with the idea of questioning the term retro, and, like all good things, it evolved and led to more questions about commercial fashion and style. While researching this article I watched Sofia Hedman’s (fashion curator and exhibition designer) closet interview on Stylelikeu.com and was struck by this quote: ‘It’s not that I’m against the commercial side of fashion, it’s just that I like things that make me think a little bit more.’ I realised that the term retro had made me stop and think about fashion (admittedly, I think about fashion a lot). But this term has also really made me question the type of clothing I choose to wear and how this has influenced my personal style. Personally, trend-based fashion rarely makes me think and I have to ask does it really make anybody question or develop their personal style. We have become accustomed to mass consumption, but is this how we should really shop? And are these clothing items adding to our personal style or taking away from it? Like Sofia I have no problem with commercial or trend based fashion; however I need to feel like a trend fits with my personal style.

Sinead Lally, owner of Cotton Face Vintage (cottonfacevintage. com), explains her idea of retro, and the popular visual icons that identify retro for her: ‘My vision of retro is funky, colourful, playful, and loud and has its own collective music beats. Yes, it’s another cleverly disguised trend in a market that is already over saturated with fads, but it works if it’s used correctly. I only like to see the word attached to certain things like flares, ’60s dresses, floral curtains and wallpaper, VW beetle vans, big sunglasses, and things like that. Retro used anywhere else or loosely on ones tongue just to clarify that they mean vintage doesn’t work for me either. ’ Another aspect of the retro/vintage debate is that of ‘retro style’ and ‘vintage style’ products, which are common in today’s fashion environment. Sinead explains:

Trends are clearly indicative of our culture and our need to express ourselves through fashion. I do not see this as a negative by any means; in fact, if trends can feed into and enhance your personal style I think it’s a great thing. What can be negative is when fashion and personal taste are prescribed. ‘Freedom of expression through personal style’, the motto of Stylelikeu.com, is a great way to curate your fashion/style choices. Another interview on Stylelikeu, this time with Princess Julia (DJ, writer and artist), suggested that ‘when you have a personal style you don’t have to follow a trend.’ This statement again caused me to stop and think. I shop quite often in vintage and charity shops, flea markets and independent boutiques, many of which incorporate retro themes in their identity. But I wonder how does the term ‘retro’, and perhaps by extension ‘vintage’, feed into trend-based fashion? Are retro and vintage mutually exclusive or do they complement each other? I approached some lovely people and asked their opinion on the issue in today’s fashion climate and asked them to respond as it pertains to them.

‘I think with vintage, nowadays people are far more aware of it and know the real deal – most people want the real deal rather than a vintage-inspired ‘copy’ from a high street store for nearly double the price. Everything in the stores right now is vintage-inspired and total copies, but really good copies! There are a couple of stores at the moment that have amazing pieces to offer, but the price tags are a little high. I buy a lot of vintage myself and I look at their tear and wear before I buy, and the craftsmanship that has gone into them is amazing.’

Mary-Joe explains further about this issue: ‘My problem lies with the terms ‘retro style’ and ‘vintage style’. Vintage and retro clothing are not only examples of the fashions of particular eras, but they are, more often than not, made of better quality materials than modern clothing and finished better, often being lined and hand sewn. By dressing in vintage and retro clothing one is also not supporting modern day sweat factories or child labour or all of the other abuses that take place in both our social and physical environments in pursuit of money and the latest trends.

‘Retro style’ is merely an item with a similar neckline or hemline as an original, but with none of the integrity of the original.’

Mary-Joe Murphy, owner of the vintage store Mercury Goes Retrograde, began her response by detailing her definition of retro: ‘For me, the term retro refers to any item from the recent past (i.e. the ’60s to the ’80s). I sell some items of furniture, and it is most evident in furniture the difference between antique, vintage and retro. A Georgian table, for instance, is immediately known as an antique, coming from the early 1800s. There then was a dramatic shift in design before the Second World War, the art deco and art nouveau movements of the ’20s and ’30s, and here, for me, is the beginning of vintage. Retro, is then the simple lines and cheaper materials of the 1960s and ’70s.’

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Designer 101

Mary Quant Nationality: British Fashion Credentials: Mary Quant, Bazaar, Kings Road In 1960s London, Mary Quant’s boutique Bazaar on Kings Road was the only place for any self-respecting fashionista to shop. The designer is credited by many for popularising, if not inventing two of fashions most controversial items of clothing: the mini skirt and hot pants.

Love them or hate them, its undeniable that Quant was instrumental in developing the mod subculture. Her clothes were made up of simple silhouettes and bold colours and regularly provoked outrage from conservative society. Buoyed by her success among the teenage generation however, Quant began to develop her aesthetic further, designing shift dresses, and plastic knee high boots, items that defined the era.

So when vintage clothing offers so much integrity and quality, why do we opt for ‘vintage inspired’ or ‘retro style’ clothing?

Personal Shopper and Stylist Natasha Crowley (fashionstylists.ie) offers a simple explanation, stating that ‘people can still be a bit funny about trying out vintage shops; I think it’s pre-loved, but they just think it’s pre-worn!’

Sinead also describes how many of the vintage styles she comes across are amazing. ‘They had so much fun making and designing clothes back then – I mean, the stuff I come across is crazy and they used to wear it without a second thought with huge hair!’ Perhaps we just aren’t as adventurous are we used to be? Are we afraid to wear something too ‘out-there’?

Natasha, I think, exemplifies how many women incorporate vintage into their wardrobes: ‘[I] wouldn’t generally wear head to toe vintage, I might pair a dress from the ’60s with a pair of boots from Topshop.

I think everyone these days is striving for individuality in the era of fast fashion, but then that vintage look can become a uniform. From a personal shopping aspect, clients will tell me they like the ’50s, ’60s etc. but will want me to recreate that for them on the high street.’

We are all striving for individuality, but, as Sinead describes, many of us choose not to buy the real deal. ‘Some choose not to buy actual vintage because they don’t like the thought of wearing second hand or “smelly clothes”.’ Interestingly, Sinead made the further point that perhaps the high-street has ‘tapped into [a market for vintage inspired clothing], maybe unknown to themselves.” Sinead has no problem with people wearing the vintage-inspired high street version; she says “that to me is fine and each to their own”, and I agree. The high street has some great imitations, and, if you’re not comfortable with true vintage, why not hop on the “vintage-inspired” bandwagon.

As Natasha said, vintage and high street clothing can be used to create an individual look, but where does retro fit into this conversation? Or should it even have a place at all?

Freelance writer and blogger Sarah Waldron (theLiceniate.com) explains that ‘retro sometimes isn’t a genuine artefact; it is a bland, impersonal impersonation and pastiche. The word itself leaves a bad taste in my mouth. It’s the kind of word that, if used un-ironically, will cause the user to squirm with embarrassment at a later date, like reading back in a diary and realising that you really overused the word ‘groovy’. ‘Retro’ and all the ersatz things that it implies will eventually be consigned to the dustbin of outdated buzzwords and, ironically, only then will it become vintage!’

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So if retro will become the new vintage, what exactly will be the 2010’s defining style feature be?

‘Vintage has come in, in a huge way and brought back mostly every era imaginable. I don’t know if we can look back and think of what style we were wearing in 2010. I’ve often thought about it, and I don’t think 2010 will have an impact like the ‘retro’ years’. I have to agree with Sinead, owner of Cotton Face Vintage. I think our obsession with personal style has led to a break away from one prescribed design style, and therefore we may not be able to associate the 2010s with a particular dress cut (i.e. 1950s swing skirt) or trousers shape (like the 1970s flare).

Whichever side of the debate you’re on, I think we are moving towards an era of conscious consumption, and vintage and retro clothing are a part of this. Natasha brilliantly explains the joy of discovering a great vintage piece. ‘For me, vintage is all about the excitement of the rummage, of never knowing what gems you might uncover. I once found a stripy blazer in a vintage shop in London with two German pfennig’s in the pocket. It’s the loveliness of these little finds that attracts me to vintage’.

If rummaging isn’t your thing then don’t be put off, all of Cork’s vintage stores are small and very easy to navigate. Another great thing about the vintage shopping experience is how personal it is. Mary-Joe at Mercury Goes Retrograde (found on Drawbridge St., at the back of Dunnes on Patrick Street) is always on hand to offer advice to her novice and seasoned customers, and online gems such as Cotton face Vintage (which can be found on Facebook) are never but a comment away, and the delivery is super-fast too! Other Cork institutions include Miss Daisy Blue, which by the time of print, should have moved to a new and bigger unit right across the way from its old home, and Washington Street’s Turquoise Flamingo always has loads of treats Images: Tumblr, All is Vintage. in store and a 10% student discount.

Motley Magazine, 2012 - 2013