Mountain Xpress, March 28 2012 by Mountain Xpress

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012

thisweek on the cover

p. Hunting down The Satyrs In 1964, four teenagers created one of Asheville’s greatest and only garage-rock bands. Their 45-rpm record is prized by the vinyl collectors who own it. But what happened to those musicians? Miles Britton went searching for the boys who looked like Beatles. Cover design by Nathanael Roney Photo courtesy Bucky Hanks

news PLACe youR bIdS

Property owners propose downtown business improvement district

bunCoMbe CoMMISSIoneRS: Two new Commissioners take first steps to replace aging schools

6 eLeCTIon 2012: one, Two

Brevard College hosts 11th Congressional District candidates debate

arts&entertainment 8 CRITTeRMAnIA!

Local psych-pop revivalists unleash gritty splendour on new 7”

50 keePIng eveRyone on THeIR ToeS Keigwin + Company’s fashion-forward take on modern dance

5 geT down, MoSeS

Moses Atwood releases One Bright Boat

5 SxSw oR buST

Lessons for Asheville from Austin’s biggest festival

features 5 7 8 7 8 0 5 8 9 0 8 55 57 6 66 67 7

LeTTeRS CARToon: MoLTon CARToon: bRenT bRown oPInIon buSIneSS bLoTTeR Open+close yARd&gARden CoMMunITy CALendAR FReewILL ASTRoLogy ConSCIouS PARTy Benefits newS oF THe weIRd weLLneSS Health+wellness news Food The main dish on local eats SMALL bITeS Local food news eATIn In SeASon What’s fresh SMART beTS What to do, who to see CLubLAnd CRAnky HAnke Movie reviews ASHevILLe dISCLAIMeR CLASSIFIedS ny TIMeS CRoSSwoRd

xpress info P.O. Box 144 • Asheville, NC 28802 (828) 251-1333 • fax (828) 251-1311 e-mail: xpress@mountainx.com www.mountainx.com

COPYRIGHT 2012 BY Mountain Xpress. AdveRTIsING COPYRIGHT 2012 BY Mountain Xpress. All RIGHTs ReseRved. Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited. Mountain Xpress is available free throughout Western North Carolina. Limit one copy per person. Additional copies may be purchased for $1.00 payable at the Xpress office in advance. No person may, without prior written permission of Xpress, take more than one copy of each issue. To subscribe to Mountain Xpress, send check or money order to: Subscription Department, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802. FIRST CLASS DELIVERY: One year (52 issues) - $115 Six months (26 issues) - $60. We accept Mastercard &Visa.

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

contact We want to hear from you.

call 8 8. 5 .

mail wall street asheville, n.c. 880

web news tips and story ideas to

news@mountainx.com letters to the editor to

letters@mountainx.com business news to

business@mountainx.com a&e events and ideas to

ae@mountainx.com events can be submitted to

calendar@mountainx.com

or try our easy online calendar at

mountainx.com/events food news and ideas to

food@mountainx.com wellness-related events/news to

mxhealth@mountainx.com. venues with upcoming shows

clubland@mountainx.com get info on advertising at

advertise@mountainx.com place a web ad at

webads@mountainx.com question about the website?

webmaster@mountainx.com find a copy of xpress:

jtallman@mountainx.com

facebook facebook.com/mountainx

twitter follow us: @mxnews, @mxarts, @mxeat, @mxenv, @mxcalendar we use these hashtags: #avlnews, #avlent, #avleat, #avlout, #avlbiz, #avlbeer, #avlhealth, #avlwx and more

letters Not all acts of kindness are random The recent Opinion column, “Random Acts,” was one-sided [March 21 Xpress]. How do you know that the people who walked by [and] did not give anything to Happy aren’t suffering themselves? How do you know if they haven’t just lost a job or their child or family member has cancer or is ill? Or their partner just left them? How do you know that they haven’t given Happy some money some other time? Maybe they don’t have any money on them. Maybe they have helped in other ways, like cooking for the vets, or donating food, blood, clothes and supplies, helping with heating, giving to their church for the hungry. Maybe some are doing the best they can do to help others. I do not agree that we all ignore the situation and are numb to it. Sure, maybe some are, but don’t lump everyone together. I have dropped money to Happy many times. I can’t do it every time I see him. Yes, it’s a sad situation, but there are also other people that need help too. Maybe many of us try to spread the love to help more then one person. I know there are a lot of resources in this town to help people in need. People don’t have to beg in the street. I volunteer at many of these places. Also, in the same issue, it was mentioned that Rosetta’s Kitchen is offering meals for $2 [“The Business of Nourishment”]. This is an amazing community with so many wonderful people giving and sharing of themselves to help those in need.

Need to Escape?

As far as seeing people in need in the streets, many times I have been stalked by vagrants in the street, or cursed at because the $5 I gave them wasn’t enough to please them. And many are often drunk, which has made me very apprehensive. So personally I would rather give my time by volunteering and donating at many agencies to help those in need instead of giving handouts. — Sandy Jones Asheville

Time Peck is a real card Tim Peck is fast becoming my favorite conservative, outpacing the always-entertaining Carl Mumpower. In his March 7 missive, “People and Profits Are in Harmony,” Peck explains the basics of capitalism as a fair exchange between a buyer and seller. And it’s true: capitalism as a theory is a wonderful, productive enterprise, and I don’t doubt profit as an effective motivator. However, it’s just a theory. I could probably make a similar case for communism: In theory, it works great. Peck is so colorful in his depiction of capitalism, even slipping “property” into the timehonored phrase “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” What a card. Capitalism, however, isn’t so wonderful in practice. When huge corporations use their financial power to sway markets (and now politics) in their favor . To put it simply (and to use one of Peck’s examples), “when Steve Jobs

CONTRIBuTING ARTS EDITOR: ursula Gullow ART & DESIGN MANAGER: Carrie Lare h AD DESIGN & PREPRESS COORDINATOR: John Zara

Private outdoor hot tubs, toasty sauna & more $42.00 26 Massage Therapists Call:

299-0999

shojiretreats.com Join Pisgah View Ranch for

EASTER DINNER SUNDAY, APRIL 8 11am & 1:30pm Children 3 & under eat FREE, ages 4-6 $10, ages 7-14 $15 and adults $25 +tax Price includes Easter Egg Hunt for ages 14 & under For Reservations Call: 828-667-9100 or 828-667-1078 Make reservations by Saturday, April 7th

Letters continue

staff PuBLISHER: Jeff Fobes hhh ASSISTANT TO THE PuBLISHER: Susan Hutchinson MANAGER CONSuLTANT: Andy Sutcliffe SENIOR EDITOR: Peter Gregutt hhh MANAGING EDITORS: Rebecca Sulock, Margaret Williams A&E REPORTER & FASHION EDITOR: Alli Marshall h SENIOR NEWS REPORTER: David Forbes FOOD WRITER: Mackensy Lunsford STAFF REPORTERS: Jake Frankel, Caitlin Byrd, Bill Rhodes EDITORIAL ASSISTANT, SuPPLEMENT COORDINATOR & WRITER: Jaye Bartell CONTRIBuTING EDITORS: Nelda Holder, Tracy Rose, Steve Shanafelt CALENDAR EDITOR, WRITER: Jen Nathan Orris CLuBLAND EDITOR, WRITER: Dane Smith CONTRIBuTING WRITERS: Susan Andrew, Melanie McGee Bianchi, Miles Britton, Megan Dombroski, Anne Fitten Glenn, ursula Gullow, Mike Hopping, Susan Hutchinson, Pamela McCown, Kyle Sherard, Justin Souther

Spa & Lodge

BOGO Richeson Bristle Brushes

GRAPHIC DESIGNER: Emily Busey STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER: Max Cooper ADVERTISING MANAGER: Susan Hutchinson ADVERTISING SuPPLEMENTS COORDINATOR: Russ Keith h RETAIL REPRESENTATIVES: Bryant Cooper, Rick Goldstein, Tim Navaille hh, Leigh Reynolds, John Varner h, Marissa Williams h CLASSIFIED MANAGER: Arenda Manning, INFORMATION TECHNOLOGIES MANAGER: Stefan Colosimo WEB MANAGER: Don Makoviney WEB GRAPHIC DESIGNER: Jesse Michel OFFICE MANAGER & BOOKKEEPER: Patty Levesque hhh ASSISTANT OFFICE MANAGER: Lisa Watters hh ADMINISTRATION ASSISTANT: Arenda Manning DISTRIBuTION MANAGER: Jeff Tallman ASSISTANT DISTRIBuTION MANAGER: Denise Montgomery DISTRIBuTION: Ronnie Edwards, Ronald Harayda, Adrian Hipps, Jennifer Hipps, Joan Jordan, Russ Keith, Marsha Mackay, Ryan Seymour, Dane Smith, Ed Wharton, Thomas Young h = Five years of continuous employment

Mon - Sat 10-6 828.231.3440

Want Your Junk Gone For Cheap or FREE?

SENIOR GRAPHIC DESIGNER: Nathanael Roney

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 5

N at u ra l

Ba by St ore

NOW OFFERING FR EE C lo t h Di ape r & Ba by we a r i ng C l as se s

EVERY MONTH!

Call or drop by for more info “ Yo u r clo t h di ape r & b a by we a r i ng h e adqua rte rs .”

Be c o G emi n i Ba by Ca r r ie r NOW IN STOCK

647 Haywood Rd. ~ West Asheville ~ 253-4747 thelittlestbirds.com

invents and sells an iPhone, Apple Corporation profits.” Actually, it profits more, because it pays some overseas workers less than a living wage so that you can pay a little less for your smart phone. Do we all profit from this? In addition, we don’t have a free market in the U.S., and it’s not because of all those pesky government regulations protecting our land, air and water. No, it’s because our government is either bailing out entire industries or sending subsidies (like the Farm Act) to corporations with no strings attached. Why is the government subsidizing oil companies? Why are banks giving their executives huge bonuses from the bailout funds? The list could go on and on. One final comment: Corporations are not interested in the public’s best interest, and they never will be. Heck, they aren’t even interested in their employees’ best interests. (If they were, layoffs would be a thing of the past.) They are interested in one thing only: short-term profits, and they will do anything, legal or otherwise, to get it. Now tell me, Mr. Peck, is that in line with “people and profits are in harmony?” — Mark H. Bloom Asheville

I ask you, women Last week I attended a local monthly women’s meeting. Three congressional candidates had been invited to speak. Attendees submitted written questions to the candidates. So I asked their positions on government involvement in women’s reproductive choices. To my shock my question was screened out; “over the top” was the phrase used. So having been denied my question by a women’s group, I write this letter reluctantly. I don’t wish to be offensive; I want to draw attention to reproductive rights for women. I have many very dear friends who may disagree with my comments. To them I say I support their right to make decisions for their own lives and I know firsthand how goodhearted they are. I, too, am a Christian. However, as a retired counselor, I have had the privilege of knowing the private grief of many people, which has taught me to be compassionate and perhaps a little less judgmental. In our country we have historically been accepting of others’ beliefs. Not that we feel it is necessary to agree with them, but that they have a right to their opinions. Certainly some Christians choose to have their reproductive choices dictated by their Christian beliefs. This is understandable. What is not understandable is that such Christians would force their beliefs on everyone else. These days there are powerful Christians who are using our government to erode the reproductive rights of women and to gradually weaken the power of medical doctors to make such decisions with their patients. Most recently they have expanded their efforts and aim to use government programs to deny women contraceptives. It should be pointed out that such government intrusion into women’s reproductive decisions would not affect women who have money. They will simply pay, or travel to countries where limitations do not exist. Only poor women will be deprived of reproductive choices. They are the least able to handle the unexpected health problems caused by lack of contraceptives.

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

correction The True Ink summer camp listing in the March 21 kids’ issue contained inaccuracies. Here is the correct entry: True Ink’s summer camps combine writing with other art forms, including illustration and cartooning, stop-action animation, puppetry, spoken word performance and radio plays. Some camps focus completely on creative writing, including a special mystery-writing camp. Programs are held at the Thomas Wolfe Memorial Site and other downtown-Asheville locations. Special guests include cartoonist Jeff Kinzel, North Carolina touring artist Michael Beadle, author, screen- and radioplay writer and television personality, Maryedith Burrell and nationally renowned performer, author and poet Allan Wolf. Day programs begin June 12 for elementary, middle school and high school age writers and vary in hours and prices. See true-ink.org or call Janet Hurley at 215-9002. I ask you, women, in the name of fairness: Isn’t it time to get the government out of reproduction? — Norma Warren Asheville

Public education: evaluate to progress Timothy Knowles, head of the University of Chicago’s Urban Education Institute, says that the best predictor of teacher effectiveness is student evaluations. An evaluation by students would be a useful supplement to the standardized tests currently in use for teacher evaluation. As students evaluate teachers, teachers should get a chance to evaluate the performance of school administrators. Official paperwork and required tasks for teachers encroaches on classroom time, and there should be some way for every teacher to comment on this development. Clearly, teaching suffers when teachers are burdened with extraneous tasks. Lastly, an elected [Asheville city] school board should replace our appointed one. An election would provide an opportunity to discuss and examine these important issues. — Bob Brown Asheville

Our healthy environment and strong local economy bind us together As a Warren Wilson student originally from Virginia, I moved to Western North Carolina because of the beautiful natural scenery and the strong environmental movement. This region’s magnificent natural heritage and environmental ethic has provided the foundation for a truly unique and sustainable local economy — from organic and local breweries, to all kinds of adventure outfitters, to a strong and growing local foods movement. Indeed, when I talk to

For other Molton cartoons, check out our Web page at www.mountainx.com/cartoons other students here, most are attracted to local colleges for the same reasons. We’re drawn to this area because of the natural beauty, vibrant local economy and community-wide concern for environmental justice and health. Our healthy environment and strong local economy bind us together, and create a sense of pride for the citizens of this area, not to mention a valuable draw to companies, students and professionals looking to move here. We need to maintain the health of our environment for our economy — and community — to thrive. It seems blatant that the General Assembly’s efforts to strip away environmental protections are a total loss for WNC. While some corporations would likely achieve higher profits from less regulation, this is not in the best interest of our local economy. They will just be dumping their costs on the taxpayers, and in the long term these actions will be devastating. The notion that our legislators would undo regulations to benefit these interests over the health and safety of our vibrant community is quite frankly insulting to all citizens of this area. — Stefan Janjic Swannanoa

Stealing art from a student? I am appalled that in a city like Asheville there are people low enough to steal an art portfolio out of a parked car in an apartment complex. My daughter is an art student at A-B Tech, and she went to her car [on a recent] morning only to find her portfolio and artwork missing. The thieves could have had the bike, but why just the art porfolio? My daughter worked hard on those drawings. The police said the artwork wasn’t of any value, so they couldn’t help her find the thieves. What an absolute shame! I pray the thieves think about what they have done and return the artwork and portfolio. Being an artist is my daughter’s dream. — Amy Johnson Elizabeth City

WCQS fundraising model needs some work Asheville public radio station WCQS [recently conducted] another time-consuming on-air fund drive. I understand the station’s need to raise money, but can anyone name another nonprofit, other than a public radio or TV station, that raises funds by annoying their most avid supporters by depriving them, day after day, of the reason for their financial support — namely, excellent, uninterrupted programming? To me this is a bit like the National Wildlife Federation trying to raise funds by threatening to kill a wild animal every day until supporters contribute more money. Or the American Cancer Society threatening to hold off research for a cure until their supporters send in their checks. WCQS claims that the use of their airwaves to reach contributors is the most cost-effective way of doing this, and most other public radio and TV stations use the same method. This may be true, but no other developed country on this planet that I know of employs this tactic for funding public broadcasting. Isn’t it about time that we in the U.S. came up with a better way? For example, why not charge the commercial broadcasters an annual license fee to use the public airwaves with the funds going to fund the public broadcasters? — Fred Flaxman Weaverville

heyyou We want to hear from you. Please send your letters to: Editor, Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall Street Asheville, NC 28801 or by email to letters@mountainx.com.

Dental Care for the Whole Family Creating bright smiles through quality care in a friendly atmosphere!

Excellence in DENTISTRY Dr. K. Donald Jackson, DDS

) “Creating

bright smiles through quality care in a friendly atmosphere!” )

BOOK YOUR APPOINTMENT NOW!

★ Same Day Emergency Care! ★ General Dentistry ★ Exclusively Mercury-Free Fillings ★ Dental Implants ★ Cosmetic Dentistry ★ Laser Dentistry ★ Braces for Adults and Children ★ Headache & TMJ Treatment ★ Sleep Apnea & Snoring Treatment

“Every dentist office should be like Dr. Jackson’s. I get courteous, professional service with great follow-up. They have gone to great lengths to keep me scheduled and rescheduled for appointments. Exceptional!” – Satisfied Patient

N E W PAT I E N T O F F E R

BRACES FOR ADULTS & CHILDREN

(you save $121) Expires in 30 days • One offer per person

(you save $475) Expires in 30 days • One offer per person

Initial Exam & X-Rays $59

FREE Workup & Consultation

900 Hendersonville Road, Suite 107, Asheville (1 Mile South of I-40)

CALL US TODAY! 828-277-6800 mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012

landofthisguy

cartoon by Brent Brown

No matter what your family looks like... you’ll find a warm welcome at Abiding Savior

Abiding Savior Lutheran Church 801 Charlotte Highway, Fairview, NC Worship 10am - Sunday School 11:15 am April 1 - Palm Sunday Celebration 10am April 5 - Maundy Thursday Worship - 7pm April 7 - Good Friday Worship - 7pm April 8 - Easter Sunday Worship - 10am; Easter Breakfast & Egg Hunt - 11:15am

Rev. David Eck, Pastor • www.abidingsaviorlutheranchurch.org 8

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 9

0 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

opinion

Intuitive Arts Fair

Stepping out Day of ViSiBility celeBrateS aSheVille’S tranSgenDer community

a tranS WeekenD

A Sanctuary for the Spiritual Seeker Since 1989

5426 Asheville Hwy. (Hwy.25)

By Jennifer Barge The second annual International Transgender Day of Visibility-Asheville happens Friday and Saturday, March 30-31. And while many folks may wonder why another LGBTQ pride event is necessary, our local transgender community clearly needs a day of its own. For too long, “transgender” has been limited to overpriced conferences celebrating victimhood, hot “Shemale” porn sites and false depictions on The Jerry Springer Show. Many people believe a transgender male or female is trying to fool someone, that we’re “gay” or that we think we were born in the wrong body. The Day of Visibility is a chance to educate mainstream people about what transgender really is — and to represent Asheville’s transgender scene. As the founder of the local event, I’m hoping to attract a diverse group of people who want to learn more about Asheville’s substantial transgender community. People often assume that everyone in the LGBTQ community is the same, but we’re not: Sexual orientation is fundamentally different from gender identity or gender expression. Several workshops scheduled for March 31 will explore these differences as well as other issues (see box). So yes, we do need our own day of pride. After transitioning, too many of us try to just blend into mainstream life, living in fear of our dirty secret being found out. It’s hard for us at times, as we have no federal ordinances to protect us. In human-rights ordinances, the transgender community is all too often the first to be thrown

March 31st • 10-4 Most Sessions $25 for 20 minutes

½ mi. S. I-26 exit 44 • Mon-Sat 10-6

We haVe no houSing or JoB protection: i loSt a management JoB at an aSheVille-BaSeD company a feW yearS Back BecauSe i WaS tranSgenDer. under the bus. We have no housing or job protection: I lost a management job at an Ashevillebased company a few years back because I was transgender. (Actually, when they called me in to fire me, they said I was a transvestite — I laugh at that now). Rachel Crandall of TransGender Michigan got the ball rolling on March 31, 2009, putting the word out on Facebook about the original International Transgender Day of Visibility event. Since then, it’s gone global, with similar celebrations popping up around the world. Besides empowerment and education, this weekend is about putting a real face on the transgender community, rather than the overblown “I need to be fixed with a tuck and snip” mentality. Fixing is what you do to cats and dogs. And speaking for myself, I wasn’t born in the wrong body, and I’m thankful for the blessing of being transgender. This is our time to let it be known that we’re not ashamed of who we are. The International Transgender Day of Visibility-Asheville offers anyone who identifies as “trans” the opportunity to be less of a mystery to mainstream people. It’s a chance to step up and out, to demonstrate that trans people are all around us and have helped shape our culture and history. The event also helps mainstream people become better informed about transgender issues.

And if, for one weekend, a large number of trans people can come together proudly instead of silently struggling with shame and guilt, maybe it will help more of us find the courage to stand up and say, “I am a human being who happens to be transgender — and you will not disrespect me!” X Asheville-area resident Jennifer Barge is the founder/director of TransHealth Coordinators. She can be reached at transgenderhealthcoordinators@ yahoo.com.

crystalvisionsbooks.com • 687-1193

The Power of Two Partner Yoga

with Stephanie and Michael Johnson Saturday, April 7 2-4pm

westashevilleyoga.com

The International Transgender Day of Visibility-Asheville 2012 begins Friday, March 30, with a 2 p.m. TransFilm Fest at the Haywood Street Congregation in downtown Asheville. The celebration will continue on Saturday with a 10 a.m. Empowerment Rally at the Vance Monument, followed by an 11 a.m. empowerment/education session and afternoon workshops at the Haywood Street Congregation. All events are free and open to the public. For details and schedule updates, visit transhealthcoordinators.org.

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012

news

place your BiDS

property oWnerS propoSe DoWntoWn BuSineSS improVement DiStrict By DaViD forBeS Amid talk of higher taxes and better services, City Council may soon decide whether downtown Asheville gets a business improvement district. Many city residents first encountered the term in 2009, when Boston-based consultants Goody Clancy recommended the idea in their draft of what became Asheville’s Downtown Master Plan. Council adopted the plan later that year, and a series of committees established by the Downtown Commission went to work on implementing it. One of them, the Downtown Management Subcommittee, was charged with crafting a specific proposal for the BID. Recently, the subcommittee has begun pitching its plan to Council, civic groups and the general public, in part through a series of public meetings. BIDs provide specified services to a designated area. In Asheville’s case, the proposal calls for City Council to levy a special tax on downtown property — 7 cents per $100 of property valuation — to help fund the BID. “Basically it will add a layer of services above and beyond what the city provides,” says downtown resident susan Griffin, who chairs the Downtown Management Subcommittee. “There’s no one model for a BID: They’re really based around local needs.” With an estimated budget of $700,000 to $900,000 a year, the local BID would be aiming to keep downtown “clean, green and safe.” To accomplish this, the nonprofit would fund 10 to 12 distinctly uniformed “downtown ambassadors,” who would help keep the area clean, assist visitors and generally keep an eye on things. In various presentations, Griffin has said the ambassadors would try to deter “illegal or undesirable behavior” ranging from panhandling to people lingering on the sidewalk. “They clean up, they check out if there are problem spots — if a sidewalk needs powerwashing, for example,” Griffin explains. “They’re trained specifically to deal with issues like panhandling; they have contact with the police. … The goal is to make this a more efficient downtown.” The ambassadors, she says, could also help with things like escorting employees who leave work late at night. In addition to the tax assessment, the city and county are each being asked to directly contribute about $150,000 per year to the BID’s budget. Griffin calls this an investment; an economic-impact study her subcommittee commissioned estimates that the BID could boost property-tax revenues in the district by

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

“clean, green and safe”: This view shows Haywood Street, the core of the proposed business improvement district. Photo by Max Cooper about 2 percent a year, and sales-tax revenue by 5 percent. The proposal would also bind city government to maintain its current level of total spending on downtown. If approved by Council in May, the BID would get an initial three-year term, after which the city could decide whether to renew. In the meantime, however, the nonprofit would be free to spend those tax dollars however it saw fit, as long as it provided the specified services.

poWerS Vary WiDely BIDs are nothing new; there are more than 50 in North Carolina alone. But what powers they have — and who wields them — can vary widely. In the early 2000s, a BID in Seattle asserted the right to treat a 62-block area of the city as if it were private property, including deciding which street performers could play there. Some of them sued, and a judge later overturned the rules concerning buskers. Asheville’s Downtown Master Plan cites the example of a BID setting up security cameras and/or providing additional security patrols. Griffin says the BID would have more modest

goals, though once approved and funded, the board could decide on a different approach. “In addition to the ‘clean, green, safe,’ its main function is advocacy ... for property owners downtown,” she reports. “Our interim board is really representative of a range of property owners” (see sidebar, “Making Their Bid”). “Everyone is cognizant that Asheville has idiosyncracies,” notes Griffin, adding, “No one’s saying, ‘Wow, let’s come in and be Charleston.’ We want to be Asheville. We don’t want to change the vibe — we want to encourage it. This is not a governmental organization.”

puBlic Sentiment unclear Although the BID itself would be a nonprofit, it could hire a private company to manage the day-to-day services. “There are companies like Block by Block and SGI that do these clean-and-green programs,” she explains. “It would be local employees, but the nonprofit can sign contracts like that.” And on March 21, Griffin told a group of downtown residents

griffin haS SaiD the “DoWntoWn amBaSSaDorS” WoulD try to Deter “illegal or unDeSiraBle BehaVior” ranging from panhanDling to people lingering on the SiDeWalk. and property owners that an interim board appointed by the subcommittee late last year wants SGI to run the BID. On March 20, the interim board settled on a governing structure for the BID: a 13-member board that would oversee SGI. A majority would be downtown property owners: three would be “major” (property worth more than $3 million); two would be “large” ($1.5 million to $3 million); and two would be “small” (less than $1.5 million). There would also be two downtown residents, two owners of retail businesses or restaurants, one office owner and an at-large member. Representatives of organizations involved in downtown would have nonvoting seats on the board. At the March 20 meeting of City Council’s Finance Committee, Griffin was asked how much support the proposal has attracted from downtown property owners. “We haven’t hit on a way that gets to public opinion about this,” she said. “You know you’ll get the 10 percent that are completely opposed, the 10 percent that are completely for it, and it’s hard to tell where the other 80 percent are.” Efforts are under way, added Griffin, to get “the largest property owners on board.” A public hearing on the matter is scheduled for the May 22 City Council meeting, followed by a Council vote on whether to approve the BID and its initial slate of board members. Council members would have to approve both the new tax and the BID’s overall budget, but after that they’d have no further say in how the organization was run. Council could also choose to approve the proposal with modifications or send it back to the subcommittee for retooling. X David Forbes can be reached at 251-1333, ext. 137, or at dforbes@mountainx.com.

making their BiD... Here’s the roster of the interim board that’s working out the details of Asheville’s proposed business improvement district: peter alberice Alberice Architecture+Design lou Bissette McGuire, Wood & Bissette David Brown - Brownstone Realty franzi charen – Asheville Grown Business Alliance, Hip Replacements Steve frabitore Tupelo Honey Café larry harris – Van Winkle Law Firm Susan griffin - downtown resident kim macQueen downtown resident chuck pickering Biltmore Company george Saenger – Adams, Hendon, Carson, Crow & Saenger

HELP & HOPE FOR

SINGLE PARENTS A W E E K LY G R O U P F O R S I N G L E P A R E N T S

carol Schneidewind Jewels That Dance Stephanie Swepson-twitty Eagle/Market Streets Development Corp. pat Whalen Public Interest Projects

There aren’t many people who truly understand the unique challenges single parents face. You deeply desire to do what’s best for your kids, but sometimes it’s all you can do to survive from

— D.F.

one day to the next. Single & Parenting is a special weekly group that will bring hope to your life. We’d love for you to join us.

NOW OPEN

7:00 p.m. Wednesdays Sundays 4pm - 5:30pm January 17–May 12 Living Hope Church Riverwood Church 555-5555 697 Haywoood Rd. 9828 Chalmers Road www.livinghopeasheville.com singleparents@example.org

Contact: Michael Lee • livinghopeasheville@gmail.com • 828-450-7575

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012

Join us for an important discussion on HOW PRECIOUS METALS CAN PROTECT YOUR WEALTH

1 battle square downtown asheville 828-575-2288 tipsystarquilts.com

Tuesday April 17, 2012 7 pm - 8:30 pm Battery Park Book Exchange Grove Arcade â&#x20AC;˘ 1 Page Ave. â&#x20AC;˘ Asheville, NC

news X buncombe

tWo neW

commiSSionerS take firSt StepS

to replace aging SchoolS

Seating is FREE and strictly limited to the first 20 guests only.

Lecture Presented by Precious Metals Expert Brad Morris. Call (561)289-4451 to reserve your seat

â&#x20AC;˘ Indoor tree house â&#x20AC;˘ Unlimited indoor play - $7 â&#x20AC;˘ Relax while kiddos play â&#x20AC;˘ FREE wi-fi

Play,Learn,Grow 828-505-2589

1020 Merrimon Ave. @ The Shoppes at Beaver Lake

www.ashevilletreehouse.com

0WFS OFX 7PMLTXBHFOT JO TUPDL

March 20 Meeting aEnvironmentalists urge joining billboard lawsuit aMarch 23 proclaimed Women Veterans History Day

By Jake frankel

04/30/2012.

web: www.harmonymotors.us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

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 â&#x20AC;˘ mountainx.com

Two new school buildings are in the works for Asheville. At their March 20 meeting, the Buncombe County commissioners unanimously approved taking the first steps toward replacing the aging Asheville Middle School and Isaac Dickson Elementary, authorizing $2 million for studies and architectural planning. The county will borrow the initial investment from its School Capital Commission Fund, which consists of lottery revenue and other state education moneys. County Manager Wanda Greene said the new middle school alone could cost upward of $30 million to $35 million, cautioning, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Until the planningâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s done, we donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have any idea.â&#x20AC;? The planning process will take 12 to 18 months, she reported. At that time, county officials will consider all their funding options, including a bond issue or a property-tax increase, noted Greene. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We need to know how much itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll cost, then decide how weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re going to try to pay for it,â&#x20AC;? she said. The new facilities would be built at the current sites: 197 S. French Broad Ave. (Asheville Middle) and 125 Hill St. (Isaac Dickson).

a capital idea: Asheville City Schools officials Allen Johnson, Al Whitesides and Gene Bell (left to right) thank the commissioners for beginning the process of replacing Asheville Middle School and Isaac Dickson Elementary. Photo by Max Cooper

During the commissionersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Feb. 7 retreat, city school officials had urged them to make capital improvements at the two schools a top priority, explaining that the current buildings suffer from leaking roofs, heating/cooling problems, plumbing troubles and other issues. And at the March 20 meeting, school officials said theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been waging a fierce behind-the-scenes lobbying campaign to rally financial support. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I want to thank each of you for visiting our schools and seeing some of the needs we have. I think seeing is believing,â&#x20AC;? noted Asheville City Schools Superintendent Allen Johnson. And Gene Bell, who chairs the city school board, thanked Greene for meeting repeatedly with school officials to discuss the issue. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been a very, very difficult process to try to get people to understand our needs,â&#x20AC;? he said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re obviously elated. â&#x20AC;Ś We want our kids in the city to have adequate facilities and continue to

make sure our city and county school systems are the best in the state.” Steve Dykes, vice president of the Asheville City Schools Foundation, added: “This will be very meaningful to our children going forward, and that’s what it’s all about. Over the next few months, we want to keep an open dialogue with you so we can determine the best course of action.” No one spoke against the measure during the public hearing. The only comment on the issue came from Enka resident Jerry Rice, who said he supports the improvements but wishes the commissioners had acted before the buildings were in such poor repair. “My concern would be, why have we waited so long to get to this place? … Let’s look at these things on the front end, not the rear end, because it seems like it’s always in election years that these kinds of things come up, and everyone wants to get on the bandwagon,” Rice maintained. “There’s lots of things that need to be taken care of before election years.” The commissioners mostly stayed silent during the proceedings, with only board Chair David Gantt offering a few thoughts before the vote. “We’ve got a moral obligation to provide for these kids,” he said. “It’s the best investment we can make, and this board wants to do it. This is the first step.”

Residents decRy billboaRd Rules During the meeting’s public-comment period, the commissioners got an earful from local environmental leaders urging the county to support legal action against new state rules allowing increased clear-cutting near billboards. The rules, which overrule any local ordinances, (see “Perfectly Clear,” Feb. 29 Xpress) increase the potential cutting zone from 250 feet to as much as 380 feet along interstate highways and state roads. Scenic North Carolina, an environmental group founded by the late Julian Price of Asheville, filed a complaint in Wake County Superior Court Feb. 29, seeking a restraining order. Since then, the group has been asking municipalities across the state for support. The city of Asheville is considering its legal options; several City Council members have voiced support for the group’s efforts.

“We need to knoW hoW much it’ll cost, then decide hoW We’Re going to tRy to pay foR it.” county manageR Wanda gReene Echoing the concerns of many of the environmentalists present, Ken Brame of the local Sierra Club chapter urged the commissioners to join with the city in opposing the rules. “In Western North Carolina, we’re very dependent on things like tourism, businesses moving in, people moving here. And one of the advantages we have is the beautiful scenery and mountains and trees we have,” he pointed out. “The last thing we need is for those areas to be clear-cut. … We’ve got a big stake in this issue.” The commissioners were tightlipped before clearing the room to go into closed session. Afterward, County Attorney Michael Frue told Xpress that the county, too, is exploring its legal options but that no decision had been made.

otheR business In other action, the commissioners: • Heard a report from the Land Conservation Advisory Board. Since 2004, the amount of land protected from development has grown from roughly 12 percent to about 14 percent of the county’s total area, according to the report. Thousands of acres are under conservation easements, in addition to the lands protected by national forest and drinking-water-watershed designations. • Voted 5-0 to enter into an interlocal agreement with A-B Tech to administer the sales-tax revenue voters approved for capital improvements last fall. • Voted 5–0 to declare March 23 “Women Veterans History Day.” The local VA Medical Center currently serves more than 1,600 female veterans, hospital officials said. X Jake Frankel can be reached at 251-1333, ext. 115, or at jfrankel@mountainx.com.

To all my loyal customers,

Thank you for your continued support of my restaurants, Green Tea Sushi in West Asheville at 2 Regents Park Boulevard and Green Tea Fusion in South Asheville at 1840 Hendersonville Road. Things have become so busy for me that I have decided to sell the Green Tea Fusion restaurant to better focus on the original location, which is coming into its 11th year of operation. My mission is to always provide innovative cuisine, excellent service, and a unique dining experience for years to come. Please keep coming back to see us and support your local, independentlyowned business that thrives because of you!

Sincerely,

Tony Ming Liu Celebrating 4 Years in Business this April!

2-for-1 Treatments During the Month of April

2 ACUPUNCTURE/$70, 2 HOUR MASSAGES/$75, 2 OSTEOPATHY/$70

779 Haywood Road • Downtown West Asheville www.CenterHolistic.com • 828-505-3174 Between Orbit DVD and the Westville Pub

japanese kitchen & sushi bar

Open 7 Days A Week! • 2 Regent Park Blvd. Asheville, NC 28806 • 828-252-8300

Now Hiring Servers! mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 15

news X western north carolina

• Tax Return Preparation, Tax Planning, Client Representation Before Tax Authorities • I help my clients resolve tax disputes including tax audits, collection matters, payroll tax problems, or back taxes!

Alan R. Wood, CPA - Retired IRS employee Specializing in Tax Matters 1528 Smokey Park Hwy • Candler • 828-301-3145 alanwood00@bellsouth.net • www.nctaxguy.com

Series #8

Ask Lawyer

DaviD Gantt Disability Social Security Workers’ Compensation

Can I draw Workers’ Compensation benefits if my work injury only aggravated a pre existing condition I had? Yes. North Carolina Workers’ Compensation law does NOT mandate that your disabling condition be caused by your accident. You may be eligible for Workers’ Compensation benefits if your work injury aggravates, accelerates, or significantly contributes a pre existing condition that makes you unable to return to your job. The law that applies to pre existing condition changes regularly. You should consult a qualified lawyer to discuss the current law on this complicated and frequently changing topic. ® Copyright 2012

82 Church Street • Asheville, NC 28801

(828) 252-2852 (800) 273-4002

w w w.d avi d ga nt t. c om

agree to DiSagree BreVarD college hoStS th congreSSional DiStrict canDiDate DeBate By caitlin ByrD The Brevard College Jazz Ensemble played in the lobby before two of the three Democratic candidates for the 11th Congressional District, Cecil Bothwell and Tom Hill, tried to hit all the right notes with voters during a March 22 debate. The third candidate, Hayden Rogers, was unable to attend. Hosted by the Brevard College Debate Society and Young Politicians of America, a national nonprofit, the 90-minute face-off drew more than 100 people — a mix of college students and the general public — to the college’s Porter Center to hear what these candidates had to say. A panel of journalists including Jim Buchanan (Asheville Citizen-Times), Mary Ann enloe (The Mountaineer) and John lanier (Transylvania Times) asked the questions. WLOS news anchor darcel Grimes served as moderator for the free event. And though Hill’s and Bothwell’s debate styles could not have been more different, they agreed on the issues more than once. Bothwell, an Asheville City Council member and former Xpress reporter, referenced his experience and used anecdotes in his opening statement — a stark contrast to Hill’s statistical approach, citing large corporations’ earnings compared with the amount of income taxes they paid. But a proposed amendment to the state constitution defining marriage as being between one man and one woman revealed the biggest difference between the two candidates. Asked if he supports it, Bothwell declared: “I am utterly opposed to Amendment One. I think it’s wrong on many levels. In fact, frankly, I’m surprised so many conservatives support it, because messing with the constitution is an extremely stupid and expensive idea.” Noting that the city of Asheville provides domestic-partner benefits for its employees, he said: “I think the government, honestly, should step away from love. We can’t dictate who loves

Good Stewardship Is Good Business

Forestry mulching is the cheapest & best way to clear your land FREE Consultations V & V Land Management & Resource Recovery LLC TN: 423-721-6077 • NC: 828-777-6637

www.voglerllc.com

6 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

face off: Democratic candidates Cecil Bothwell and Tom Hill talked politics during a recent debate at Brevard College (fellow candidate Hayden Rogers was unable to attend).. Photo by Caitlin Byrd whom: None of us can dictate who loves whom in our own relationships. For the government to step in there makes absolutely no sense to me.” Hill, however, voiced support for the amendment, saying, “I think every child is entitled have a mother and a father and not ‘my two mommies,’ not ‘my two daddies.’” He quickly added that homosexual couples should be allowed to live together, but “Don’t expect the state to recognize it as a legal marriage.” Amendments aside, Hill said: “I think that many people in these cases have a genetic problem. I think that is the problem in most cases, not all cases. For those who have the genetic problem, I sympathize with them.” That prompted a man in the audience to shout, “No!”

“I’m not speaking softly on this issue, and that’s where I stand,” Hill replied. In their closing statements, both candidates hinted at why they’d decided to run. Bothwell said: “We need to change the way work in Washington is done. The only way to change it is to get the money out of politics.” For his part, Hill, who’s making his first bid for office since he ran for class president in high school, said: “I am committed to honesty and integrity in government. I will criticize Democrats: We have to be honest with where we are failing.” X For the latest local election coverage, go to mountainx.com/election. Caitlin Byrd can be reached at 251-1333, ext. 140, or at cbyrd@mountainx.com.

BuSineSS

Blotter March brings spring’s arrival, as well as the first days of business for a number of new establishments — many in the former locations of closed retailers and restaurants listed in the February edition of “Business Blotter.” Here’s the tally at press time; stay tuned for more business changes slated for April and May — including a few downtown Asheville expansions. If we miss something, or if you have a tip or announcement to share concerning a local opening, closing, renovation or relocation, let us know at business@mountainx.com. Photo by Max Cooper.

Now Open for the season

openingS atelier (additional showroom for gallery), 68 College St., atelier24lexington.com. charmed (jewelry boutique), 46 Haywood St. in the Haywood Park Hotel. Donatelli cake Designs, 57 Haywood St., donatellicakedesigns.com. edna’s of asheville (café), 870 Merrimon Ave., ednasofasheville.com. la magia exotic peruvian Jewelry and more (Pictured), 30 Battery Park Ave. mother earth produce (farm-goods delivery service), motherearthproduce.com. Strada restaurant, 27 Broadway, stradaasheville.com. tacqueria con cuida, 185 Clingman Ave. (Grey Eagle), avl.mx/c9. the lot (food-truck court, various vendors), 51 Coxe Ave., avl.mx/c8. tiger mountain thirst parlour, 103 Broadway, tigermountainthirstparlour.com. trail head restaurant and Bar, 207 W. State St., Black Mountain. 357-5656. Vera cruz (coffee roaster, produce market), 3732 Sweeten Creek Road, Arden.

West asheville Vineyard (Christian community center), 717 Haywood Road, westashevillevineyard.org. Wild Birds unlimited nature Shop, 1997 Hendersonville Road asheville.wbu.com. Writer’s Bistro at the renaissance hotel, 31 Woodfin St. 359-7951.

renoVationS & relocationS asheville art museum (major expansion), 2 S. Pack Square, ashevilleart.org.

cloSingS asheville Bravo concerts (performance series), ashevillebravoconcerts.org. fiore’s ristorante toscana, 122 College St. J.c.’s auto Services, 116 N. Lexington Ave.

Open 7 Days A Week • Breakfast • Lunch • Dinner Lodging • Gifts • Crafts (828) 235-8228 • Call for road conditions www.pisgahinn.com Located between milepost 408 & 409, South of Asheville on the Blue Ridge Parkway Please check for road closures coming from Asheville. Alternate Route is Hway 151 from Candler.

mountain Java, 870 Merrimon Ave.

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 7

yard&garden

by Bill rhodes

Backyard chickens Chickens? In the city? New ordinances make it possible in Asheville, along with a few good reasons for keeping them: 1. Chickens are easy and inexpensive to care for, when compared to most other pets. 2. Hens will produce eggs, and backyard eggs are healthier than the store-bought counterparts. 3. Chickens provide excellent chemical-free pestand-weed control, as well as great fertilizer; and 5. They’re the perfect backyard pet. (from backyardchickens.com) But what does it cost to get into this? How many eggs can you get? For that matter, where do you get a chicken? Fear not. All of these questions and more are easily answered online, or from one of your neighbors who is already doing it. As far as costs, you can go as cheap as your imagination allows. You need a coop, which you can build yourself or buy, as taste and budget require. You need chickens: Buy full-grown ones or hatchlings (like our little friend pictured here) from lots of places online or in town. As to how many eggs — that depends on several factors. Happy chickens lay more eggs. Some breeds of chicken lay more eggs, some less. With a little research and some patience, you will find raising chickens in your backyard as easy as growing vegetables. If you live within the city limits, you need to get a permit from the city; see http://avl.mx/ck.

What a mug: This two-week-old chicken named Pipi calls West Asheville home. Photo by Bill Rhodes

gardeningcalendar Calendar for MarCh 28 - april 5, 2012 Asheville Garden Club • WE (4/4), 10am - Judith Deutsch, president of the AshevilleBlue Ridge Rose Society, will present “Going Green in the Garden” at the next Asheville Garden Club meeting. Held at North Asheville Community Center, 37 E. Larchment Road. Free. Info: 258-0922. Cold-Hardy Grapevine Selection for the Mountains • WE (4/4), 6pm - Learn the characteristics and varieties of grapes that will grow well in the mountains of WNC at this course, held on

18 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

A-B Tech’s Enka Campus, Small Business Center, Room 2046. $10. Info and registration: www. grapevineselection.eventbrite.com. Composting and Vermiculture • WE (3/28), 2pm - Master gardener Sheryl Cuppy will present tips for composting and vermicultre at the Haywood County Library, 678 S. Haywood St., Waynesville. Refreshments will be provided and three worm bin starter kits will be given away. Free. Info: http://bit. ly/z72DVR. Garden Hotline • MONDAYS through FRIDAYS, 8:30am-4:30pm - A garden hotline will be offered by Buncombe

County Extension Master Gardeners. Info: 255-5522. Gardening Workshop • SA (3/31), This course will include two sessions: “Raised Bed and Square Foot Gardening,” 9-10:15am, and “Composting, Natural Soil Amendments: Companion Planting and More,” 10:45am-noon. Held at Biltmore Coffee Traders, 518 Hendersonville Road. Sponsored by Live Simply Workshops. Free. Info: 699-2887. Men’s Garden Club of Asheville • TU (4/3), 11:30am - “Gardening in the Understory” with horticulture specialist Richard Bir. Held at First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. Lunch

registration required by March 30. $11 for lunch. No registration required for free program, which begins at 12:30pm. Info: 329-8577. Soil Fertility Workshop • SA (3/31), 9:30am-4:30pm - A workshop on soil fertility will be offered by Living Web Farms at the Mills River Educational Farm, 176 Kimzey Road. $25/free for those in financial need. Info: www. livingwebfarms.org. WNC Orchid Society Show • SA (3/31) & SU (4/1), 9am5pm - The N.C. Arboretum, 100 Frederick Law Olmsted Way, hosts the annual WNCOS Show, featur-

ing orchid exhibits and sales, free programs and raffle prizes. Info: 665-2492, www.wncos.org or www.ncarboretum.org.

More GardeninG eVenTS online Check out the Gardening Calendar online at www.mountainx.com/ events for info on events happening after April 5.

Calendar deadline The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication. Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 365

JOHN’S • • • • •

Bobcat, Mini-Excavator & Dump Truck Service

Driveways • Gravel • Drainage Utility Lines • Lot Cleanup Demolition • Retaining Walls Boulders • Erosion Control Stone Steps • Fire Pits

Veggie Starts Seed Potatoes Organics Spring Hours: M-F: 8-6 Sat. 8:30 - 5

Responsible Site Work at Reasonable Prices

CALL JOHN

(828) 318-6765 sprING pLaNTs are here!

Thyme in the Garden gifts for garden & home

Garden Tip of the Week: Now is a good time to plant perennials, shrubs and trees. Despite the warm weather, we can still experience freezing temperatures up to May 10th. If you do plant annuals earlier, be prepared to cover at night during frost warnings.

We offer cusToM poTTING servIces aT your hoMe or busINess

190 Weaverville hwy • 658.3700 9 am-6 pm Mon-sat facebook.com/ThymeintheGarden

Let Green Outdoors Do The Planting For You! THIS WEEK’S SPECIAL

Green Outdoors Landscape And Nursery

Large 3 gallon Azaleas ONLY $12.95

Buy 5, get 1

FREE! Must present this ad at time of purchase.

91 Weaverville Hwy Asheville, NC 19-23 North to Exit 23, turn right, 1 block on left

828-645-5298

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 9

calendar

your guide to community events, classes, concerts & galleries

calendar categories community events & workshops / social & shared-interest groups / government & politics / seniors & retirees / animals / technology / business & careers / volunteering / health programs / support groups / helplines / sports groups & activities / kids / spirituality / arts / spoken & written word / festivals & gatherings / music / theater / comedy / film / dance / auditions & call to artists Calendar for MarCh 28 - april 5, 2012 Unless otherwise stated, events take place in asheville, and phone numbers are in the 828 area code. Day-by-day calendar is online Want to find out everything that’s happening today — or tomorrow, or any day of the week? Go to www.mountainx.com/events. Weekday abbreviations: SU = Sunday, MO = Monday, TU = Tuesday, WE = Wednesday, TH = Thursday, FR = Friday, SA = Saturday

Animals attracting Bluebirds to Your Yard • TU (4/3), 7pm - A presentation on attracting bluebirds will be presented by Simon Thompson at the Fairview Library, 1 Taylor Road. Free. Info: fairview.library@

buncombecounty.org or 250-6484. Brother Wolf animal rescue A no-kill organization. Info: www.bwar.org or 505-3440. • WEDNESDAYS, 10am; SATURDAYS, 9am & SUNDAYS, 10am - The Outward Hounds hiking club encourages the public to take adoptable dogs on Ashevillearea hikes. Free. • DAILY, 8am-8pm - Pet Adoption Day at the rescue center, 31 Glendale Ave. Open from 8am-6pm on Sundays. Dog-Dog interactions: how to interpret Body Language • SA (3/31), noon - Learn how to understand dog-dog interactions and interpret body language, with Jenny White of Dog-Ed, at this workshop hosted by Patton Avenue Pet Company, 1388 Patton Ave. Well behaved dogs welcome. Free. Info: www.pattonavenuepet.com.

Calendar deadlines:

*free and paid liSTinGS - WedneSday, 5 p.M. (7 dayS prior To publiCaTion) Can’t find your group’s listing?

Due to the abundance of great things to do in our area, we only have the space in print to focus on timely events. Our print calendar now covers an eight-day range. For a complete directory of all Community Calendar groups and upcoming events, please visit www.mountainx.com/events..

Calendar information In order to qualify for a free listing, an event must cost no more than $40 to attend and be sponsored by and/or benefit a nonprofit. If an event benefits a business, it’s a paid listing. If you wish to submit an event for Clubland (our free live music listings), please e-mail clubland@mountainx.com. Free Listings To submit a free listing: * Online submission form (best): http://www.mountainx.com/ events/submission * E-mail (second best): calendar@mountainx.com * Fax (next best): (828) 251-1311, Attn: Free Calendar * Mail: Free Calendar, Mountain Xpress, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802 * In person: Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall St. (the Miles Building), second floor, downtown Asheville. Please limit your submission to 40 words or less. Questions? Call (828) 251-1333, ext. 365. Paid Listings Paid listings lead the calendar sections in which they are placed, and are marked (pd.). To submit a paid listing, send it to our Classified Department by any of the following methods. Be sure to include your phone number, for billing purposes. * E-mail: marketplace@mountainx.com. * Fax: (828) 251-1311, Attn: Commercial Calendar * Mail: Commercial Calendar, Mountain Xpress, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802 * In person: Classified Dept., Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall St. (the Miles Building), Ste. 214, downtown Asheville. Questions? Call our Classified Department at (828) 251-1333, ext. 335.

Joys of Pet Ownership contest • Through MO (4/2) - “Is your dog an athlete or a working dog and partner? Is your cat an acrobat?” Share the joy of pet ownership with a video or still picture, accompanied by an essay of 500 words or less. Sponsored by the North Carolina Responsible Animal Owners Alliance. Contest winners will receive a $150 Amazon gift certificate. Submit entries to ncraoa@ yahoo.com. rabies Vaccination clinic • SA (3/31), 2-4:30pm Low-cost rabies vaccinations will be offered at the N.C. Army National Guard Armory, 2025 Spartanburg Highway, Flat Rock. $8 per pet. Oneyear vaccines will be given unless proof of prior vaccination is provided for a 3-year vaccine. Info: cpforpetsinc@ aol.com. rusty’s Legacy • SATURDAYS, 10am-3pm - Rusty’s Legacy animal rescue will host pet adoptions at the Black Mountain Tractor Supply Company, 125 Old Highway 70. Info: rustyslegacync@aol.com or http://avl.mx/9p.

Art arT 310 art gallery Riverview Station, 191 Lyman St., #310. Fri.Sun., 9:30am-3:30pm or by appointment. Info: www.310art.com or 7762716. • FR (3/30) through MO (4/30) - The Appalachian Pastel Society’s spring show will feature the “diverse talents” of its members. Info: www.appalachianpastelsociety.org. american Folk art and Framing Oui-Oui Gallery is located at 64 Biltmore Ave. Mon. - Sat., 10am-6pm; Sun., noon-5pm. Info: www.amerifolk.com or 281-2134. • Through TH (4/12) - Approach, works by self-taught artists from the Southeast. • TH (4/5) through WE (4/25) - Rested Soul, interpretations of the agrarian

0 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

wisdom by painter Lucy Hunnicutt. appalachian State University 423 West King St., Boone. Info: www.tcva.org or 2623017. • Through SA (3/31) - Senegal: A Window into Francophone West Africa will be on display in the east wing of the community gallery. • Through SA (6/2) - Robert Goodnough: Abstract Expressionism and Beyond will be on display in the east wing of the main gallery. • Through SA (6/2) - Works by the Appalachian Mountain Photography Competition winners will be on display in the Turchin Center for the Arts. art at Mars hill college Weizenblatt Gallery: Mon.Fri., 9am-5pm. Info: www. mhc.edu. • Through WE (4/18) - Works by Taiyo la Paix will be on display in the Weizenblatt Gallery. art at Unca Art exhibits and events at the university are free, unless otherwise noted. Info: www. unca.edu. • Through TU (4/3) - The 44th annual Juried Student Exhibition will be on display at S. Tucker Cooke Gallery, Owen Hall. • Through MO (4/16) - The Heroic Present: The Gypsy Photographs of Jan Yoors will be on display in the Karpen Hall lobby. Info: 232-5024. • MO (4/2) - A hand-built caravan will be on display in the Main University Quadrangle. Free. Info: 2325024. • Through FR (3/30) - Artistic Diversity in Fiber will be on display in UNCA’s Ramsey Library. art events at WcU Held at the Fine Art Museum, Fine & Performing Arts Center on the campus of Western Carolina University. Hours: Mon.-Fri., 10am-4pm & Thurs., 10am-7pm. Free, but donations welcome. Info: www.fineartmuseum.wcu. edu or 227-3591. • Through FR (3/30) Drawings and paintings by Ron Laboray. artist Plate

• Through SU (5/6) - A collection of artist-made dinner plates and “related insights about food” will be on display at the Penland School of Crafts, 67 Dora’s Trail, Penland. Info: www.penland. org or 765-2359. • FR (3/30), 7-8:30pm Opening reception. arts council of henderson county • FR (3/30) through FR (4/13) - Artists of Tomorrow: Secondary Student Exhibition will be on display at First Citizens Bank, 539 North Main St., Hendersonville, Mon.-Th., 9am-5pm and Fri., 9-6pm. Info: acofhc@bellsouth.net or 693-8504. Info: acofhc@bellsouth.net. asheville art Museum Located on Pack Square in downtown Asheville. Hours: Tues.-Sat., 10am-5pm and Sun., 1-5pm. Programs are free with admission unless otherwise noted. Admission: $8/$7 students and seniors/ Free for kids under 4. Free first Wednesdays from 35pm. Info: www.ashevilleart. org or 253-3227. • Through SU (9/9) - Prime Time: New Media Juried Exhibition. • Through SU (7/8) - Fire on the Mountain: Studio Glass in Western North Carolina. • Through SU (10/28) - Artworks Project Space: Hoss Haley Installation. • Through SU (9/16) - Ancient Forms, Modern Minds: Contemporary Cherokee Ceramics. • SA (3/31) through SU (8/26) - The Essential Idea: Robert Motherwell’s Graphic Works (abstract expressionist). asheville community theatre Located at 35 E. Walnut St. Tickets and info: www.ashevilletheatre.org or 254-1320. • Through SA (3/31) - Rhythm and Movement: Paintings by Mary Charles Griffin will be on display in the lobby. atelier 24 Lexington: a gallery of Local art Located at 24 Lexington Ave. Mon.-Sat., 11am-6pm. Info: www.theateliergalleries.com. • SU (4/1) through MO (4/30) - Original works by Kudulah. Bella Vista art gallery

14 Lodge St. Spring hours: Mon., Wed. and Fri., 10am4pm. Thurs., noon-4pm. Sat., 11am-5pm. Info: www. bellavistaart.com or 7680246. • Through SA (3/31) - With and Without Copper, works by Stephen White, Sally Jacobs and Nancy Varipapa. Black and White and Wood • Through SA (3/31) - Black and White and Wood will feature works by Madison McCollough, Jim Covert, Holly de Saillan and others at Clingman Cafe, 242 Clingman Ave. Info: 2532177. Black Mountain center for the arts Old City Hall, 225 West State St., Black Mountain. Mon.Wed. and Fri., 10am-5pm; Thurs. 11am-3pm. Info: www.BlackMountainArts.org or 669-0930. • Through TH (4/5) Emerging Artists, works by BMCA drawing and painting students. celebration of Women in the arts • TH (3/29), 9am-9pm - A celebration of women in the arts will feature female sculptors, photographers, furniture-makers and other artists in Blue Ridge Community College’s auditorium and Patton Building, Room 150. Free. Info: marthah@blueridge.edu or 694-1743. center For craft, creativity and Design Located at the Kellogg Conference Center, 11 Broyles Road in Hendersonville. Info: www. craftscreativitydesign.org or 890-2050. • Through FR (6/29) Torqued and Twisted, works by nine furniture makers and sculptors. crimson Laurel gallery 23 Crimson Laurel Way, Bakersville. Info: www.crimsonlaurelgallery.com. • SU (4/1) through SA (4/28) - New works by ceramicist Ryan McKerley, featuring diagrams, Mayan glyphs and symbols used in mathematics clingman cafe • SU (4/1) through MO (4/30) - Beauty: Love: Power, works by Anne Bevan and Blue Fire MacMahon, will be on display in Clingman

Cafe, 242 Clingman Ave. Info: clingmancafeasheville. com or 253-2177. First congregational United church of christ Located at Fifth Avenue W. and White Pine Drive, Hendersonville. Info: www. fcchendersonville.org. • SU (4/1) through MO (4/30) - The Faces of Haywood Street, to benefit Homeward Bound and The Haywood Community. Mon.Thur., 9am-1pm. Flow: handmade adornment for Body and home 14 South Main St., Marshall. Wed.-Sat., 11am-4pm. Info: http://avl.mx/aw. • Through SA (4/7) - Art for Food, 14 regional artists and craftspeople will celebrate food. Folk art center Located at milepost 382 on the Blue Ridge Parkway. Info: 298-7928 or www.craftguild. org. • Through TU (4/17) - Works by Cherly Hevrdeys (glass) and Martine House (fiber). • Through SU (5/13) - The American Association of Wood Turners Invitational Exhibition will feature 25 artists from around the world. grand Bohemian gallery Located at the Grand Bohemian Hotel in Biltmore Village, 11 Boston Way. Mon.-Thur., 10am-7pm; Fri.-Sat., 10am-8pm; Sun., 10am-5pm. Info: www. bohemianhotelasheville.com or 505-2949. • SA (3/31) through MO (4/30) - Works by Stefan Horik. • SA (3/31), 5-8pm Opening reception. grovewood gallery Located at 111 Grovewood Road. Info: www.grovewood. com or 253-7651. • Through SA (3/31) Tradition Meets Innovation: Objects and Accents of the Arts and Crafts Home. haen gallery Located at 52 Biltmore Ave., downtown Asheville. Hours: Mon., Wed. and Fri., 10am6pm. Tues. and Sat., 11am6pm and Sun., noon-5pm. Info: www.thehaengallery. com or 254-8577. • Through SU (4/29) - The View From Here, new works by Emily Wilson and Larry Gray.

haywood county arts council Unless otherwise noted, showings take place at HCAC’s Gallery 86 in Waynesville. Hours: Mon.Sat., 10am-5pm. Info: www. haywoodarts.org or 4520593. • WE (4/4) through SA (4/28) - Gardens, Mountains and Streams: An Artist’s View of the Haywood County Garden Tour. hcc Photography exhibit • Through FR (6/29) Photography by Haywood Community College’s continuing education digital photography class will be on display in the Haywood County Public Library’s meeting room, 11 Pennsylvania Ave., Canton. Info: 648-2924. • SU (4/1), 2-4pm - Opening reception. Letterpress Poster Show • Through SA (3/31) Letterpress posters by Lance Wille and Jason Krekel of Hand-Cranked will be on display in PULP, 101 Biltmore Ave. Info: www.theorangepeel.net. Lonebackpacker gallery of World Photography 94 Depot St., Waynesville. Daily, 11am-5pm; Closed Wed. and Sun. Info: www. lbpgallery.com or 550-8105. • FR (3/30), 6-9pm - An opening reception for the new gallery will feature works by photographer and owner Adam Malis. nuestras Voces, nuestras historias • Through SA (3/31) Nuestras Voces, Nuestras Historias / Our Voices, Our Stories, works documenting immigrants in WNC, will be on display at UNCA’s Highsmith Union Gallery. Info: cesap.unca.edu/calendar. Odyssey center for the ceramic arts Located at 238 Clingman Ave. Mon.-Fri., 9-5pm; Sat., 10am-6pm; Sun., noon-6pm. Info: www.odysseyceramicarts.com • Through FR (5/4) - A ceramics show will feature works by gallery assistants Jan Cothran, Paul Frehe and Tisha Cook. Pat Passlof retrospective • Through FR (5/25) - A retrospective of the late Pat Passlof’s work will be on display in WCU’s Fine Art

aSheVille earth Day

photo conteSt Week three Asheville Earth Day and Xpress have teamed up on a photo contest leading up to this year’s Saturday, April 21, festival. Photo entries are to be uploaded to the official Asheville Earth Day Facebook wall (facebook.com/AshevilleEarthDay). Six winners will be selected, with the winning entries showcased each week, for six weeks, in an issue of Xpress in print or online at mountainx.com. Each winner receives two VIP passes to the 2012 Asheville Earth Day festival (info at avlearthday.org). This week’s winning photo is “Green Creek” by Karl Hinterkopf.

Join us for an Open House in Asheville to learn about Adoption and Foster Care. Sat. 3/24 • 3-4:30pm • Barium Springs office Thurs. 3/29 • 6-7:30pm • Barium Springs office Tues. 4/10 • 6-7:30pm • Barium Springs office For Info Call Robert at 828-236-2877 30 Garfield St. Suite D - Asheville, NC mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012

Museum, 1 University Drive, Cullowhee, and Black Mountain College Museum and Arts Center, 56 Broadway St. Info: ddrury@ wcu.edu or 227-2553. Phil Mechanic Studios 109 Roberts St. Houses Flood Gallery, Pump Gallery and Nook Gallery. Info: www. philmechanicstudios.com. • Through SA (3/31) - One Billion Seconds, works by German-born local artist Heinz Kossler. Pre-happening • FR (3/30), 6-9pm - PreHappening, hosted by BMCM+AC and MAP, will be held at The Artery, 346 Depot St. Event will featuring Re-Happening artists. $5 donation. Info: www.rehappening.com or www.ashevillearts.com. Push Skate Shop & gallery Located at 25 Patton Ave. Info: www.pushtoyproject. com or 225-5509. • Through TU (4/10) Murders and Murmurations, works by Rob Hunt and Alli Good. recreations • Through FR (4/27) - Recreations, an exhibit of upcycled art, will be presented by Goodwill Workforce Development at the West Asheville Library, 942 Haywood Road. Info: awray@goodwillnwnc.org. the artery Community arts facility at 346 Depot St., River Arts District. Info: www.ashevillearts.com. • Through SA (3/31) - Genetically Commodified, personalized “Real Dolls” by Kirsten Stolle. three Perspectives on nature • Through SA (3/31) - Desert Moon Studios and Gallery, 372 Depot St., Suite 44, celebrates the Spring Equinox with its latest exhibit, Three Perspectives on Nature, featuring photographs by Cleaster Cotton, Laurie McCarriar and David Simchock. Info: www.desertmoondesigns-studios.com, 575-2227 or desertmoondesigns@gmail.com. transylvania community arts council Located at 349 S. Caldwell St., Brevard. Hours: Mon.Fri., 9:30am-4:30pm. Info: www.artsofbrevard.org or 884-2787. • TH (4/5) through FR (4/27) - Transylvania County Student Art Show. • TH (4/5), 4-6pm - Opening reception. Upstairs artspace 49 S. Trade St., Tryon. Hours: Tues.-Sat., noon6pm. Sun., noon-4pm. Info:

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

www.upstairsartspace.org or 859-2828. • Through SA (4/28) - Artists Among Us: 100 Faces of Art in Spartanburg.

Auditions & Call to Artists Birdhouse competition • Through WE (4/11) - The Grove Park Inn birdhouse competition will accept entries through April 11. Info: 252-2711. Black Mountain arts and crafts Show • Through TU (5/1) - The Black Mountain Arts and Crafts Show will accept applications from crafters through May 1. Info: craftshow@olddepot.org or 669-4563. Black Mountain Memoir contest • Through MO (4/2) - The Black Mountain Memoir Contest will accept submissions through April 2. Hand delivery to the Black Mountain Library, 105 N. Dougherty St., required. Info: 250-4756. Brevard Fine arts and crafts Showcase • Through FR (5/25) Applications for Brevard’s 40th annual fine arts and crafts showcase will be accepted through May 25. Info: tcarts@comporium.net or 884-2787. clips of Faith • Through (4/16) Filmmakers are invited to submit short films to New Belgium Brewing’s Clips of Faith tour through April 16. Films on the themes of craft beer, sustainability and adventure are encouraged. Info: www.clipsoffaith.com. Film casting call • FR (3/30), 4-7pm - A casting call for the independent film Facing Up will be held at 34 South Lexington Ave. Bring a headshot and resume. Info: facingup@ gmail.com. French Broad river Metropolitan Planning Organization grants • Through WE (3/28) Applications for the French Broad River Metropolitan Planning Organization’s FTA JARC and New Freedom grants for community and public transportation programs will be accepted through March 28. Info: www.fbrmpo.org. green Business award • Through MO (4/2) - ECO will accept submissions for its Green Business Award through April 2. Info: www,eco-wnc.org or 6920385. Jericho Productions

• Through SU (4/15) Jericho Productions seeks one middle-aged male actor for a two-person play to be performed in June. Send resume: jerichoproductions@yahoo.com. LaaFF grants • Through TU (5/15) - LAAFF will accept applications for mini-grants for artists through May 15. Info: kitty@arts2people.org. LaaFF Poster Design • Through SA (3/31) LAAFF will accept designs for its 2012 poster art through March 31. Info: LAAFFasheville@gmail.com. Mountain heritage Day • Through FR (3/30) - Arts and crafts vendors are sought for the Mountain Heritage Day festival through March 30. Info: www.mountainheritageday.com. name that creek • Ideas are sought for the “Name That Creek” project, sponsored by RiverLink. Info: volunteer@riverlink.org. PaperWorks • Through TU (5/1) - TC Arts Council will accept submissions for its PaperWorks exhibit through May 1. Info: tcarts@comporium.net or 884-2787. Physical Performance artists • Dancers, actors, acrobats, mime artists and physical performance artists are needed for a site-specific physical theater piece on Sat., April 7. Info: www.cillavee.com or (917) 650 7321. Poetry contest • Through FR (3/30) Submissions for the Writers’ Workshop poetry contest will be accepted through March 30. Info: www.twwoa.org. School garden grants • Through MO (4/30) - The Extension Master Gardener program will offer grants of approximately $250 to schools with, or interested in starting, a garden through April 30. Second Stage of Life comedy • Professional, amateur and aspiring comics over 40 are sought to establish the Second Stage of Life comedy troupe. Info: debidrecksler@ gmail.com. Spring awakening • SA (3/31), 2-5pm - Bioflyer Productions will host auditions for Spring Awakening. Info, appointment and location: rock684@ hotmail or www.bioflyer. wordpress.com. Summer gathering craft Show • Through TU (5/1) Applications for the Summer Gathering craft show in Marshall will be accepted

through May 1. Info: enstylevg@yahoo.com or (423) 972-1190. taste of asheville • Through TH (4/5) - A Taste of Asheville will accept applications from local restaurants through April 5. Info: kperez@ashevillenc.gov or 259-5800.

Beer thirsty Monk (downtown) 92 Patton Ave. Info: www. monkpub.com or 254-5470. • SU (4/1), 3pm - Pint night with the Budweiser Girls will feature giveaways and free glasses. The Budweiser Girls arrive at the downstairs Belgian bar at 5pm.

Business & Technology iPad at Work Seminar at charlotte Street computers (pd.) Join us for an informal briefing on advancements in using the iPad in a work environment. Topics will include accessing and managing documents and files, creating and delivering presentations, hosting and attending virtual meetings, and analyzing business intelligence, among others. Saturday, March 31st from 2-4:30pm. Register online at: charlottestreetcomputers.com/seminars. arts2People artist resource center • The Arts2People Artist Resource Center seeks instructors with business management skills. Classes are geared towards creative professionals. Info: www. ashevillearc.com. Business Skills Meetings • MONDAYS, 6pm - The Entrepreneur Skills Network offers a business skills meeting in Room 246 of the Jackson County Justice and Administration Building, 401 Grindstaff Cove Road, Sylva. Info: 497-0160, 586-5466 or esn4meetings@gmail.com. Free tax assistance • MONDAYS & WEDNESDAYS through (4/17), 10am-4pm - Free tax assistance will be offered at Pack Library, 67 Haywood St. Info: 628-3662. • TUESDAYS, 9am-4pm Tax assistance will be offered at West Asheville Library, 942 Haywood Road. Info: 250-4750. • THURSDAYS, 10am-4pm Tax assistance will be offered at Weaverville Public Library, 41 Main St. Info: 250-6482. • TUESDAYS, 10am-4pm Tax assistance will be offered at Black Mountain Library, 105 N. Dougherty St. Info: 250-4756.

Free tax Preparation • OnTrack Financial Education and Counseling will offer free tax preparation for families earning less than $50,000. Info and appointment: 255-5166. Ontrack Financial education & counseling Unless otherwise noted, all classes are free and held at 50 S. French Broad Ave., Suite 222. Info: www. ontrackwnc.org or 255-5166. • TUESDAYS through (4/10), 5:30-7pm - “Money Buddies” partners women struggling with financial independence with other women in similar situations during this six-week series. Held at Silvermont Senior Center, 364 East Main St., Brevard. Free. • THURSDAYS through (4/12), 5:30-7pm - An additional “Money Buddies” program will be held at OnTrack Financial Education and Counseling, 50 South French Broad Ave.

Classes, Meetings, Events & Lectures asheville newcomers club (pd.) A great opportunity for women new to the area to make lasting friends, explore the surroundings and enrich their lives. Contact us! ashevillenewcomersclub.com or l 828.654.7414. easy Pop art Portrait class (pd.) Sat. March 31st, 1-5 $50.00 includes supplies Easy - Fun - Beginners welcome Call Eli 828 243-0200 or eli@workinggirlsstudio. com 30 Battery Park #210 Learn to Knit at Purl’s Yarn emporium (pd.) On Wall Street downtown: Beginning Knit :1st and 2nd Wednesdays, 6-8pm; Intermediate Knit: 3rd and 4th Wednesdays. • $40/4 hours of instruction. 828-2532750. www.purlsyarnemporium.com Mac Basics classes at charlotte Street computers (pd.) Mac Basics Computer Classes are being held at Charlotte Street Computers, 252 Charlotte Street. Class time is 12:15 - 12:45pm. Mondays - Mac OS X, 1st and 3rd Tuesdays of each month - iPhoto, 2nd Tuesday - iWork Essentials, 4th Tuesday - iMovie Basics, 5th Tuesday - Garageband, Wednesdays - iPad Basics. Registration is just $9.99 at classes@charlottestreetcomputers.com. Mac Basics classes at charlotte Street computers (pd.)The Big Bad Bunny Urban Scavenger Hunt The Big Bad Bunny Urban Scavenger Hunt: Saturday

April 7. 2:00-5:00 starting at Asheville Brew Company on Coxe Ave. Teams of 23. $20 per person. Prizes! www.raceofawesome.com (917)710-2805 acrylic Painting class • WEDNESDAYS through (4/25), 10am-noon - Acrylic painting classes will be offered by the Asheville Parks, Recreation and Cultural Arts Department at Harvest House, 205 Kenilworth Road. $30 per session includes supplies (except brushes). Registration required. Info: harvesth@ashevillenc.gov or 350-2051. act vs Sat comparison test • SATURDAYS, 9am & SUNDAYS, 1pm - Asheville students are invited to take an “ACT vs SAT Comparison Test” to determine which represents their best match. Held at Chyten Educational Services, 1550 Hendersonville Road, Suite 104, Asheville. Free. Info and reservations: www.chytenasheville.com or 505-2495. asheville Bridge room • DAILY - The Asheville Bridge Room offers games for beginners and advanced players at River Ridge Market Place, 800 Fairview Road, Suite C-1. $7 per game. Info: 299-0887. Blue ridge Orchestra Lecture • FR (3/30), 11:30am Milton Crotts, director of the Blue Ridge Orchestra, will provide an “inside peek at the creative process of the orchestra” in the Manheimer Room of UNCA’s Reuter Center. Info: unca.edu/ncccr. cLOSer • TUESDAYS, 7pm CLOSER, Community Liaison Organization for Support, Education and Reform, will host a meeting for LGBT members of the community at All Souls Cathedral, 9 Swan St. Info: avlcloser@ gmail.com. courthouse tours • WEDNESDAYS, 2pm Historic courthouse tours will depart from 200 North Grove St., Hendersonville. Free. Info: 694-5003. creative Sector Summit • TH (3/29), 10-11:30am - The Creative Sector Summit features programs on networking and creative problem solving to promote collaboration. The morning session will be held at Asheville Community Theatre, 35 East Walnut St. $25 for full day/$10 Asheville Area Arts Council members. No one turned away for lack of funds. Info: www.ashevillearts.com. —- 2-5pm - The afternoon session will include

Get ready... Saturday, April 7

The BiG BAd BuNNy uRBAN ScAveNGeR huNT 20% Of Proceeds go to the Winning Team’s Choice of Non-Profit Register Now! www.raceofawesome.com

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012

a forum on cultural resources at the Asheville Art Museum, 2 S. Pack Square. Four Seasons toastmasters • WEDNESDAYS, 8-9am - Four Seasons Toastmasters invites the community to improve their public speaking skills. Held in the Smoky Mountain Theatre of Lake Point Landing retirement community, 333 Thompson St., Hendersonville. $10 per month. Info: 606-9830. golden LeaF • MO (4/2), 6pm - The Clay County/Golden LEAF Community Assistance Initiative forum will be held at the New Courthouse, 261 Courthouse Drive, Hayesville. Info: pcabe@goldenleaf.org or 888-684-8404. green Building Directory Party • WE (3/28), 6-9pm - A release party for the Green Building Directory will feature a presentation about sustainable urbanism, along with appetizers and beer. Held at Pack Place lower lobby, 2 S. Pack Square. Free. Info: www.wncgbc.org or 2541995. hunger Week • Through SA (3/31) - Mars Hill College’s Hunger Week will feature a community food drive, film screening, hunger

banquet, fashion show and more. Held throughout the campus. Many programs are free. Info, times and locations: www.mhc.edu. international transgender Day of Visibility • FR (3/30) & SA (3/31) - This two-day educational event aims to put a real face on the transgender commuity in a positive way and features film screenings, Q&A sessions, health screenings and more at various locations throughout Asheville. For a full list of events, visit www. transhealthcoordinators.org. La 31 Open house • WE (3/28), 5-8pm Leadership Asheville and LA 31 will host an open house with board members, graduates and current students of this local leadership program. Held at The Wine Studio of Asheville, 169 Charlotte St. Free. Info: www.leadershipasheville.org or 348-0673. Laurel chapter of the embroiderers’ guild of america Info: www.egacarolinas.org or 654-9788. • TH (4/5), 10am - Monthly meeting will focus on the evolution of the American quilt. Held at Cummings United Methodist Church, 3 Banner Farm Road, Horse Shoe.

Ox creek community history collection • SATURDAYS through (6/9), 10am-2pm - An exhibition will feature selections from the Ox Creek Community History Collection at the Weaverville Library, 41 North Main St. Free. Info: ckgrimes@charter.net. Ponderer’s cafe group • TUESDAYS, 6:45 - This easygoing, guided questioning aims to cultivate discussion and broaden perspectives on a variety of interesting topics. Free. Info: www. meetup.com/PonderersCafe. Public Lectures & events at Unca Events are free unless otherwise noted. • TH (3/29), 12:30pm - “Justice for All: The History of the Justice Center,” with Marty Nicholson. Held in Ramsey Library. Info: 2516645. —- 12:30pm - Nadine Cohodas will discuss the life of musician Nina Simone in the Highsmith University Union’s Mountain View Suite. Info: 251-2996. • FR (3/30), 11:30am - Lunch and Learn: Milton Crotts of the Blue Ridge Orchestra. Held in the Reuter Center. Info: unca.edu/ncccr or 251-6140. —- 11:25am “Modernism and the Harlem Renaissance,” with Peter

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

Caulfield, professor of literature, and Seamus McNerney, lecturer in humanities. Held in Lipinsky Auditorium. —- 11:25am - “Postmodern Culture/Contemporary Art,” with Brian Butler, chair and associate professor of philosophy. Held in Humanities Lecture Hall. Info: humanities. unca.edu or 251-6808. • MO (4/2), 11:25am - “Persia and the Hellenistic World,” with Grant Hardy, director of humanities and professor of history. Held in the Humanities Lecture Hall. Info: humanities.unca. edu. —- 11:25am - “Before the World Was New: The Americas Before European Contact,” with Ellen Pearson, associate professor of history. • TU (4/3), 12:30pm - Climate scientist Michael Mann will discuss his book The Hockey Stick and the Climate Wars in the Humanities Lecture Hall. Info: 250-2359. • WE (4/4), 7pm - “Mountaintop Mining: Environment, Ethics and Faith,” with Reverend John Rausch and Dana and Susan Robinson. Held in the Sherrill Center, Mountain View Room 417. Info: 2516651. —- 4pm - The N.C. Agriculture Commissioner’s

Speakers Series will present a panel of farmers, business leaders, restauranteurs and legislators. Held in the Sherrill Center. Info: (919) 707-3011. • TH (4/5), 7pm - “Codes are Everywhere,” with mathematician Judy Walker. Held in Lipinsky Auditorium. Info: math.unca.edu. Puppet club • 1st TUESDAYS, 7pm - The Asheville Puppet Club is a casual, fun and collaborative group which meets monthly in Montford. All levels welcome. RSVP for directions: katievenezolana@hotmail. com or http://avl.mx/8c. rV camping club • SU (4/1) through FR (11/30) - The Small RV Camping Club currently seeks new members. Info: lilnau@aol.com or 369-6669. Scriptwriting class • Classes on scriptwriting and story development, as well as Final Cut X, Reiki and Qigong, will be offered at the Flat Iron Building, 20 Battery Park Ave, on various days. Call for date, time and price. Free for nonprofits and low income residents. Info: 280-7287. SiSta group • THURSDAYS, 6:308:30pm & FRIDAYS,

5:30-7:30pm - SISTA, an educational program to help women avoid unhealthy relationships and STDs, will meet Thursdays at Pisgah View Apartments, 1 Granada St., and Fridays at the Reid Center, 133 Livingston St. Free, but registration requested. Info: otimmons@wncap. org or 252-7489. West african Drum class • TUESDAYS, 6:30pm - Instruction with Adama Dembele from the Ivory Coast. All levels welcome. Held at Terpsicorps’ new studio, 339 Lyman St. $15. Info: www.terpsicorps.org. Women’s Spring roots retreat • SU (4/1), 10am-5pm - Join Mountain Roots for a day of art, yoga (or Qigong), fresh air and community. Groups of four or more receive a $5 discount. Held at Laughing Waters Retreat Center, 3963 Gerton Highway, Gerton. $30 in advance/$35 door. Info: www.mountainroots.org.

Dance Bharatanatyam classes • adult • children (pd.) Bharatanatyam is the sacred classical dance form of India. Adult and children’s classes now forming.

Traditional Kalakshetra Style. • DakshinaNatya Classical Arts. Riverview Station. • Call Tess: (828) 301-0331. Learn more: www.riverviewstation.com Dancing’s Fun! (pd.) Quick and easy lessons. Swing, Ballroom, Country Two Step. Very reasonable rates plus schedule @ your convience! Singles, couples, Learn at your location or Asheville, and Fletcher. 352-558-4200 Studio Zahiya (pd.) Monday 7:30-9pm Bellydance • Tuesday 89am Booty Camp Fitness • 9-10am Hip Hop Workout • Noon-1pm Groove Dance • 5:15-6pm Intro to Bellyydance • Wednesday 6-7 Intro to Hip Hop, • 7:309 Bellydance 2 • Thursday 9-10am Bellydance, • 6-7pm Bollywood, • 8-9pm Hip Hop 2 • Friday 10-11am Bhangra Workout. • $12 for 60 minute classes. 90 1/2 N. Lexington Avenue. www. studiozahiya.com Bailey Mountain cloggers • FR (3/30) & SA (3/31), 7pm; SU (4/1), 3pm - The Bailey Mountain Cloggers will present As Scene on TV, a celebration of family television, in Mars Hill College’s Moore Auditorium. $10/$8

seniors/children under 6 free. Info: dbuice@mhc.edu or 689-1113.

Beginner clogging classes • WE (3/28), 7:15pm - The Mountain Thunder Cloggers will host an eight-week session of beginner clogging instruction for ages 7 and up. $40/half price for additional family members. Info and registration: www.mtnthundercloggers.org. Bhangra/hip-hop aerobic classes • WEDNESDAYS, 6:30pm - Learn the lively Indian dance Bhangra, mixed with a little hip-hop, at this weekly series. Beginners and dropins welcome. Held at Carver Community Center, 101 Carver Ave., Black Mountain. $10. Info: www.holisticwithhumor.com/dance. contra Dance • MONDAYS, 8pm - Contra dancing will be offered at the Grey Eagle, 185 Clingman Ave. Beginners welcome. $6. Info: www.danceasheville. com. english country Dance Dance as they do in film adaptations of Jane Austen novels. No partner necessary. Held at 19 Zillicoa St. Info: www.oldfarmersball. com.

• FR (3/30), 8-11pm - The Spring Evening Ball will feature pianist Jacqueline Schwab and refreshments. Formal attire encouraged, but not required. $10. Southern Lights SDC Held at the Whitmire Activity Building, 301 Lily Pond Road, Hendersonville. Info: 696-9198. • FR (3/30), 7:30-9:30pm - “All Hot Hash Dance.” TriState Dance Contest • SA (3/31) through SU (4/1) - The TriState dance contest will be held in Thomas Wolfe Auditorium, 87 Haywood St. Free to attend. Info: www.ashevillenc.gov. West African Dance • TUESDAYS, 7:30pm - This high-energy dance includes live drumming. Held at the new Terpsicorps studio, 339 Lyman St. All levels welcome. $12/$10 students. Info: ashevilledrumdance@ gmail.com.

Buncombe County Garbage Dump Tour • WE (3/28), 9:30am12:30pm - A tour of the Buncombe County garbage dump will focus on the amount of waste that the county’s residents produce. Group will meet at the Lakeview Senior Center, 401 S. Laurel Circle, Black Mountain. $6. Info: 6698610. Fracking Awareness • FR (3/30), 7pm - A program on fracking for natural gas will include presentations, live music and a showing of the documentary Gasland. $5. Presented by Clean Water for N.C., N.C. Interfaith Power and Light and the UU Congregation of the Swannanoa Valley at White Horse Black Mountain, 105C Montreat Road. Info: www.whitehorseblackmountain.com or 669-0816. The Nature Conservancy Info: 350-1431, ext. 105 or mtns_volunteers@tnc.org. • WE (3/28), 9am-3pm - The Nature Conservancy will host a “Work and Learn” nature art workshop for volunteers at Bat Cave Preserve. Attendees will then remove invasive plants from the preserve. Info and registration: mtns_volunteers@tnc.org or 350-1431.

a farmer’s market, fools parade, stroller race, “trashion show,” masquerade ball, live music and more. Festivities kick off Friday at 7 p.m. and Saturday at 10 a.m. Held in downtown Tryon. Proceeds benefit local nonprofits. Info: www.downtowntryon.org. Easter Egg Hunt: Acton UMC • SA (3/31), 2-4pm - Acton UMC will host an egg hunt for children fifth grade or younger at 171 Sand Hill School Road. Free. Info: actonevents@gmail.com. Easter Egg Hunt and Celebration: Asheville • SA (3/31), 2-4pm - An Easter celebration and egg hunt will feature music, inflatables, crafts and the Easter bunny. Held at Carrier Park, 500 Amboy Road. Free. Info: www.ashevillenc. gov or 259-5800. Easter Egg Hunt: Black Mountain • SA (3/31), 10am - An Easter egg hunt for children and adults will feature music, games, crafts and snacks. Held at Black Mountain Recreation Park, Blue Ridge Road at Recreation Park Drive. Free. Info: www. blackmountain.org/calendar or 669-8610. Easter Egg Hunt: Fairview • SA (3/31), 2-4pm - An Easter egg hunt for elementary school-aged children will feature prizes, the Easter bunny, music and food. Held at Sherrill’s Inn at Hickory Nut Gap Farm, U.S. Highway 74. $50/$20 Southern Appalachian Highland Conservatory members. Free with $35 membership. Info: rich@appalachian.org or 253-0095. Easter Egg Hunt: SmithMcDowell House • SU (4/1), 2-4pm - An Easter egg hunt for children will features prizes and a sing-a-long. Held at the Smith-McDowell House Museum, 283 Victoria Road. $5 children/adults free. Registration recommended. Info: www.wnchistory.org or 253-9231. Easter Egg Hunt: Zeugner Center • SA (3/31), noon - An Easter egg hunt will feature crafts, face painting and games. Indoor pool will be open until 3pm. Held at The Zeugner Center, 50 Springside Drive. Free/$2 to swim. Info: 684-5072.

Festivals

Food

April Fool’s Festival • FR (3/30) & SA (3/31) - The Tryon April Fool’s Festival will feature familyfriendly activities, including

CSA Fair • TH (3/29), 3-6pm - Appalachian Sustainable Agriculture Project will host a CSA Fair for those inter-

Eco

freewillastrology ARIES (March 21-April 19)

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

A few months after America invaded Iraq in 2003, soldier Brian Wheeler wrote the following to help us imagine what it was like over there: “Go to the worst crime-infested place you can find. Go heavily armed, wearing a flak jacket and a Kevlar helmet. Set up shop in a vacant lot. Announce to the residents that you are there to help them, and in the loudest voice possible yell that every Crip and Blood within hearing distance is a PANSY.” As a character-building exercise, Aries, I highly recommend you try something like this yourself. APRIL FOOL! I was just kidding. What I just said is not an accurate reading of the astrological omens. But this is: Get out of your comfort zone, yes, but with a smart gamble, not a crazy risk.

In his documentary film Prohibition, Ken Burns reports on the extreme popularity of alcohol in 19th-century America. He says that the typical person over 15 years of age drank 88 bottles of whiskey a year. In light of the current astrological omens, Leo, I suggest you increase your intake to that level and even beyond. APRIL FOOL! I lied. It’s not literal alcoholic spirits you should be ingesting in more abundance, but rather big ideas that open your mind, inspirational sights and sounds that dissolve your inhibitions, and intriguing people who expand your worldview.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) According to a recent poll, God’s approval rating has dipped below 40 percent for the first time on record. My research suggests the new low is due in part to a disproportionate amount of dissatisfaction by those born under the sign of Taurus. Can you fix this please? If you’re one of the discontent, please see if you can talk yourself into restoring some of your faith in the Divine Wow. APRIL FOOL! The real truth is, I encourage you to be skeptical in regards to all authorities, experts, and topdogs, including God. It’s an excellent time in your cycle to go rogue, to scream “I defy you, stars!” Be a rabble-rousing, boat-rocking doubter.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) Photographer Darrin Harris Frisby doesn’t think people should smile in photographs. He regards it as “superficial and misleading.” In the greatest portraits ever painted, he says, the subject’s gaze is almost always neutral, “neither inviting nor forbidding.” Did Rembrandt ever show people grinning from ear to ear? No. Did Vermeer, Goya, Titian, Sargent, or Velasquez? Nope. Make that your guiding thought in the coming week, Gemini. Be a connoisseur of the poker face. APRIL FOOL! I lied. The truth is, in the coming week you will have more than ample reasons to be of good cheer. You should therefore express delight extravagantly.

CANCER (June 21-July 22) Back in 1835, a newspaper known as The New York Sun resorted to an extreme measure in order to boost readership: It ran a story about how the renowned astronomer Sir John Herschel had perfected a telescope that allowed him to see life forms on the moon, including unicorns, two-legged beavers that had harnessed fire, and sexually liberated “manbats.” If I’m reading the astrological omens correctly, Cancerian, you temporarily have license to try something almost equally as wild and experimental to “boost your readership.” APRIL FOOL! I lied about the unicorns. Don’t refer to cliched chimeras like them. But it’s fine to invoke more unexpected curiosities like fire-using beavers and sexually liberated manbats.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) A woman in Euclid, Ohio claims her house is haunted by randy ghosts. “They have sex in my living room,” Dianne Carlisle told a TV news reporter. “You can see the lady’s high-heeled shoes.” I suspect you may soon be dealing with a similar problem, Virgo. So consider the possibility of hiring an X-rated exorcist. APRIL FOOL! The naked truth is that you will not be visited by spooks of any kind, let alone horny ones. However, you would be smart to purify and neutralize old karma that might still be haunting your love life or your sex life. Consider performing a do-it-yourself exorcism of your own memories.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) In Karley Sciortino’s NSFW blog Slutever.com, she announces that “this blog is intended to trick strangers into thinking my life is more exciting than it actually is.” I highly recommend you adopt that approach, Libra. Do whatever it takes — lying, deceiving, exaggerating, bragging — to fool everyone into believing that you are a fascinating character who is in the midst of marvelous, high-drama adventures. APRIL FOOL! I wasn’t totally sincere about what I just said. The truth is, your life is likely to be a rousing adventure in the coming days. There’ll be no need to pretend it is, and therefore no need to cajole or trick others into thinking it is.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) “Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem,” said author William Gibson, “first make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by a—holes.” This is a good time to check in with yourself, Scorpio, and see if Gibson’s advice applies to you. Lately, the jackass quotient seems to have been rising in your vicinity. APRIL FOOL! I was half-joking. It’s true that you should focus aggressively on reducing the influence of jerks in

your life. At the same time, you should also ask yourself rather pointedly how you could reduce your problems by changing something about yourself.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Do not under any circumstances put on a frog costume, go to a shopping mall, and ride around on a unicycle while reciting erotic poetry in German through a megaphone. APRIL FOOL! I lied. That wouldn’t be such a terrible use of your time. The astrological omens suggest that you will be visited by rather unusual creative surges that may border on being wacky. Personally, though, I would prefer it if you channeled your effervescent fertility in more highly constructive directions, like dreaming up new approaches to love that will have a very practical impact on your romantic life.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) In F. Scott Fitzgerald’s novel The Great Gatsby, Daisy Buchanan is stirred to the point of rapture by Jay Gatsby’s silk shirts. “I’ve never seen such beautiful shirts before,” she sobs, burying her face in one as she sits in his bedroom. I sincerely hope you will have an equivalent brush with this kind of resplendence sometime soon, Capricorn. For the sake of your mental and even physical health, you need direct contact with the sublime. APRIL FOOL! I half-lied. It’s true that you would profoundly benefit from a brush with resplendence. But I can assure you that plain old material objects, no matter how lush and expensive, won’t do the trick for you.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) Last December a woman in Tulsa, Oklahoma made creative use of a Wal-Mart. She gathered various ingredients from around the shelves, including lighter fluid, lithium, and drain cleaner, and set up a meth lab right there in the back of the store. She’s your role model for the coming week, Aquarius. APRIL FOOL! I lied, kind of. The woman I mentioned got arrested for illegal activity, which I don’t advise you to do. But I do hope you will ascend to her levels of ingenuity and audacity as you gather all the resources you need for a novel experiment.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) A Filipino man named Herbert Chavez has had extensive plastic surgery done to make himself resemble Superman. Consider making him your role model, Pisces. I hope he inspires you to begin your own quest to rework your body and soul in the image of your favorite celebrity or cartoon hero. APRIL FOOL! I lied. In fact, you’d be wise to avoid comparing yourself to anyone else or remolding yourself to be like anyone else. The best use of the current cosmic tendencies would be to brainstorm about what exactly your highest potentials are, and swear a blood oath to become that riper version of yourself.

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 25

ested in joining Community Supported Agriculture programs. Meet farmers, sample products and sign up for food shares. Held at The Grove Arcade, 1 Page Ave. Free. Info: www.asapconnections.org. • TU (4/3), 4-6pm - An additional fair will be held at Hob Nob Farm Cafe, 506 W. King St., Boone. indoor Winter Market • WEDNESDAYS, 2-6pm An indoor winter tailgate market will be held at Biltmore Park Town Square, 2 Town Square Blvd., Suite 170. Info: www.asapconnections.org or 236-1282. Palm Sunday greek Lunch • SU (4/1), 11am-2pm - A Palm Sunday lunch, hosted by the the Holy Trinity Greek Orthodox Church, 227 Cumberland Ave., will feature folk dancing and Greek food, including pastichio, spanakopita and deserts. Food prices range from $1-$12. Info: 253-3754 or 254-4754. taste of home cooking School • TH (3/29), 4-8pm - Taste of Home magazine will host the Taste of Home Cooking School at Crowne Plaza Expo Center, 59 Expo St., featuring samples from local restaurants and demonstrations. Participants will receive a gift bag and magazine subscription. Registration required. $13. Info: www.mix965asheville.com. White horse Spring Farmers Market • WEDNESDAYS, 3-6pm - This indoor/outdoor farmers market features local meats, produce, cheese, breads, chocolates and crafts, along with fresh seafood from the Outer Banks. Held at White Horse Black Mountain, 105 Montreat Road, Black Mountain. Info: www.whitehorseblackmountain.com.

Government & Politics OccUPY/Wnc • TUESDAYS, 7pm OCCUPY/WNC promotes economic and social justice for the 99+1% through its General Assembly and working groups meeting. Held in Room 220 of the Jackson County Justice Center, 401 Grindstaff Cove Road, Sylva. Info: 743-9747.

Kids affordable Fun! Sweet tee Mini golf... (pd.) ...Is a PORTABLE mini golf course you can rent for your next party or event. Check out our website for details and pricing! www.

SweetTeeMiniGolf.com (828) 333-1152. Swim Lessons at the YW (pd.) Learn skills for water fun, fitness and safety! Swim lessons in the YWCA’s solarheated pool, 185 S. French Broad Ave. Red Cross certified instructors. Affordable rates. More info: 254-7206 or www.ywcaofasheville.org. asheville Youth ensemble • Young musicians are invited to perform with the Asheville Youth Ensemble. Strings, flute, recorder, percussion and piano players welcome. Beginning music reading skills required. Info: ashevilleyouthensemble@ gmail.com or 299-4856. events at Pardee hospital All programs held at the Pardee Health Education Center in the Blue Ridge Mall, Hendersonville. Info and registration: www.pardeehospital.org or 692-4600. • TH (3/29), 4-7pm Parents and preschoolers are invited to learn about Henderson County Schools in advance of kindergarten registration. Free. hands On! This children’s museum is located at 318 North Main St., Hendersonville. Hours: Tues.-Sat., 10am-5pm. Programs require $5 admission fee/free for members. Info: www.handsonwnc.org or 697-8333. • Through FR (3/30) - NanoDays will celebrate nanoscale science and engineering with science experiments and demonstrations. • WE (3/28), 10:30am - Crazy Chemistry: gummy worms. Ages 3 and older. Registration requested. • TH (3/29), 4-7pm - A science program for preschoolers approaching kindergarten. • Through MO (4/30) Children are invited to make art with recycled materials. • WE (4/4), 11am - “Let’s Get Moving” for children of all ages. Registration requested. hip hop class • MONDAYS, WEDNESDAYS & FRIDAYS, 3:30-4:30pm - A hip-hop class for children grades K-12 will be offered at Waynesville Recreation Center, 550 Vance St. Free for members/$20 pass for 15 visits. Registration required. Info: youthprogramsupervisor@townofwaynesville.org or 456-2030. Kids’ cooking class • SU (4/1), 11am-12:30pm - A cooking class for children ages 3-5 will be held at the Asheville Jewish Community Center, 236 Charlotte St. $25. Info and registration:

rochelle@jcc-asheville.org or 253-0701. Middle School confidence Series • THURSDAYS through (4/5), 5:30-7pm - The Girls Scouts’ Peaks to Piedmont chapter invites 6th and 7th grade girls to learn how to handle cliques, peer pressure, jealousy and complicated friendships. Held at 64 W.T. Weaver Blvd. $15. Info and registration: ashevilleintern@girlscoutsp2p.org or 252-4442. Playball • SUNDAYS, 10am - Playball encourages children ages 2-4 to learn life skills through low-pressure sports. Classes meet on various Sundays through May at times based on the age of the child. Held at the Asheville Jewish Community Center, 236 Charlotte St. Registration required. $15 per class. Info: rochelle@jcc-asheville.org.

the Blue Ridge Mall, 800 Brevard Road #620. Free. Info: http://bit.ly/xjvzY0. RSVP: (855) 774-5433. events at Pardee hospital All programs held at the Pardee Health Education Center in the Blue Ridge Mall, Hendersonville. Free, but registration is required unless otherwise noted. Info and registration: www.pardeehospital.org or 692-4600. • TH (3/29), 6:30-8pm Infant care class. $10. • TH (4/5), 6:30-9pm - A class on childbirth will be offered to expectant parents. new Baby asheville • FRIDAYS, 10am-1pm - Get support, meet other moms, share your story, ask questions and connect with community at this free weekly meeting. Info and directions: Lisahicks1018@gmail.com.

Outdoors

Song O’ Sky Show chorus (pd.) TUESDAYS, 6:45pm - Rehearsal at First Congregational United Church of Christ (UCC) 20 Oak Street Asheville 28801.(Enter Fellowship Hall-lower level). Guests welcome. Contact: www. songosky.org Toll Free # 1866-824-9547. iMPrOV class (pd.) IMPROV Class at NYS3 by industry professional Tom Chalmers: 7-week class in Performance Comedy Improv for those that have had some training in Improv. Tues. 6:00 -8:00 Contact: info@nys3. com (917) 710-2805 www. nys3.com Voiceover Workshop (pd.) Industry professionals with over 20 years experience in LA and NYC will instruct. Tuesday, April 3, 6:00 @ NYS3. $45 email info@nys3.com to signup (917) 710-2805 www.nys3. com/workshops.html a Dream of camelot: a return to Love • TH (3/29) through SA (3/31), 7:30pm; SU (4/1), 2:30pm - A Dream of Camelot: A Return to Love will feature original songs about the rise and fall of ancient Camelot. Held at the Asheville Masonic Lodge, 80 Broadway St. $25/$20 in advance/$15 preview on March 29. Info: www. ADreamofCamelot.com or 658-9604. Blue ridge Orchestra Info: www.blueridgeorchestra.org. • WEDNESDAYS, 7-9pm - Open rehearsals for the Blue Ridge Orchestra will be held most Wednesdays in the Manheimer Room of UNCA’s

Beautiful Lake James Marina • Boat Slips available (pd.) Beat the Summer rush and reserve a covered, uncovered or houseboat slip. Great location at Canal Bridge. Security, gas sales, marine store and customer lounge. Call (828) 584-0666. Signs of Spring on the French Broad river (pd.) Encounter the beauty and tranquility of the French Broad River as it springs to life with the chatter of wildlife and the colorful burst of new foliage. Special Events page at www. HeadwatersOutfitters.com or www.HeadwatersOutfitters. com/signs_of_spring.html Lake James State Park N.C. Highway 126. Programs are free unless otherwise noted. Info: 584-7728. • SA (3/31), 1pm - A 3.5mile nature hike along the Mill’s Creek Trail will meet at Paddy’s Creek Area office.

Parenting ever had a Mini golf course in your backyard? (pd.) Now you can! Rent us for your next event or party. You provide food and drinks, we’ll do the rest! 828.333.1152. www.SweetTeeMiniGolf. com engaging Kids in eating healthy • TU (4/3), 5:30pm - Presented by Park Ridge Health Nutritionist and KidPower Coordinator Haley Donaldson. Registration required by March 30. Hosted by Park Ridge Health at The Health Adventure in

6 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

Performance & Film

Reuter Center. Free. Call for confirmation: 251-6808. • SU (4/1), 4pm - The Blue Ridge Orchestra will present “An Overture to Spring,” featuring works by Bach, Sibelius and Dvorak. Held at Diana Wortham Theatre, 2 South Pack Square. $15/$5 students. Info: www.dwtheatre.com or 257-4530. Brevard college Band Festival • Through TH (3/29), 9am9pm - The WNC District Band Festival will feature 61 middle and high school bands performing in Brevard College’s Porter Center. Free. Info: 884-8112. classic World cinema Foreign Film Series • FR (3/30), 8pm - Part 2/2 of Satantango (1994 Hungary) by Bela Tarr. Presented by Courtyard Gallery, 109 Roberts St., Phil Mechanic Studios, River Arts District. Free. Info: www. ashevillecourtyard.com or 273-3332. Flashmob • The YMCA will host disco, hip-hop and swing music flashmobs, with the goal of gathering 2,000 people. Dance classes held at various locations and times. Free. Info and locations: (917) 710-2805. Flat rock Playhouse Mainstage: Highway 225, Flat Rock. Downtown location: 125 South Main St., Hendersonville. Info: www. flatrockplayhouse.org or 693-0731. • WEDNESDAYS through SUNDAYS until (4/22) - My Favorite Things: The Music of Rodgers and Hammerstein will be performed at the Mainstage location. See website for times. $40/$38 seniors/$22 students. grind cafe 136 West Union St., Morganton. Info: www. facebook.com/grindcafe or 430-4343. • FR (3/30), 7:30pm - The Harris Brothers (traditional American music). $5. • SA (3/31), 7:30pm Wendy Hayes (jazz). $5. hendersonville Little theatre Info: www.hendersonvillelittletheatre.org or 692-1082. • FRIDAYS through SUNDAYS until (4/1) - Harps and Harmonicas will be performed by Hendersonville Little Theatre at its new main stage, 229 South Washington St. $20/$10 under 18. Info: www.hendersonvillelittletheatre.org or 692-1082. hooterville hoedown’s Big Show • TH (3/29), 7pm - Michelle Leigh will perform at the Opportunity House, 1411 Asheville Highway 25,

as part of the Hooterville Hoedown’s Big Show. $5/$8 for BBQ dinner at 5:30pm. Info: hootervillehoedown@ gmail.com. KOLOrZ • SA (3/31), 3-9pm KOLORZ, a motion sculpture movement installation, will be presented by Cilla Vee Life Arts. Held at The Artery, 346 Depot St. $10. Info: www. cillavee.com or cillavee@ gmail.com. Mavis Staples • SA (3/31), 8pm - Mavis Staples (soul and gospel) will perform in UNCA’s Lipinsky Auditorium. $35/$7 students/$5 UNCA students. Info: uncatickets.com. Mezzo the happy Medium • FR (3/30), 10pm - Mezzo the Happy Medium: A Haunted Comedy, MafiaStyle will feature Trey Ashe and Mezzo Gracioso from LaZoom Tours. Held at The Magnetic Theatre, 372 Depot St., Suite 50. $10. Info: www.themagneticfield.com or www.lazoomtours.com. Music at Brevard college Events take place in Brevard College’s Porter Center for the Performing Arts. Info: www.theportercenter.org or 800-514-3849. • SU (4/1), 7:30pm Seldome Scene (bluegrass). $25-$20. nc Stage company Info: www.ncstage.org or 239-0263. • WEDNESDAYS through SUNDAYS until (4/22) Circle Mirror Transformation will be co-produced by the Immediate Theatre Project and N.C. Stage. Open Mic • WEDNESDAYS, 7pm - Letters to Abigail hosts an open mic night at The Inn on Church, 201 3rd Avenue W., Hendersonville. Free. Info: www.facebook. com/letterstoabigail or www. innonchurch.com. Over the river and through the Woods • FR (3/30) through SU (4/1), 2:30pm - Over the River and Through the Woods will be performed as part of the Autumn Players’ Reader’s Theatre. Fri. and Sat., 35Below, 35 E. Walnut St.; Sun., UNCA’s Reuter Center. $5. Info: unca.edu/ ncccr or 251-6140. Performances at Diana Wortham theatre Located at 2 South Pack Square. Info: www.dwtheatre.com or 257-4530. • FR (3/30) & SA (3/31), 8pm - Keigwin and Company (ballet and contemporary dance). $35/$30 student. Slice of Life comedy

• MO (4/2), 2pm - Stand-up comedy and booked open mic will include free snacks, drink specials and a raffle for charity. Professional video taping available for performers. Held at Pulp, below the Orange Peel, 103 Hilliard Ave. $5. Info and booking: sliceoflifecomedy@gmail. com. St. Matthias Musical Performances Located at 1 Dundee St. (off South Charlotte). Info: 285-0033. • SU (4/1), 3pm - A chamber music concert will feature Franklin Keel and Kara Poorbough, members of the Opal String Quartet. Donations accepted. tartuffe • THURSDAYS through SATURDAYS until (3/31) - Tartuffe by Moliere will be performed in UNCA’s Carol Belk Theatre. $10/$8 UNCA faculty and seniors/$5 students. Info: 232-2291. the hop Ice cream, concerts and community events. 640 Merrimon Ave., Suite 103, unless otherwise noted. www.thehopicecreamcafe. com or 254-2224. • FR (3/30), 6:30-7:30pm - A performance by Cripps Puppets for children and adults. the runaway circus • FR (3/30) through SU (4/1) - The Runaway Circus and Loose Cabooses will present “Rock, Paper, Scircus” at Odyssey School, 90 Zillicoa Street. $10. Info and times: www.runawaycircus.com. transFilm Fest • FR (3/30), 11am & SA (3/31), 10am - The TransFilm Fest will feature Almost Myself and Southern Comfort at Haywood Street Congregation, 297 Haywood St. An empowerment rally will depart from the Vance Monument on Saturday, with educational programs at Haywood Street Congregation to follow. Free. Info: www.transhealthcoordinators.org. tryon Fine arts center Located at 34 Melrose Ave., Tryon. Info: www.tryonarts. org or 859-8322. • TU (4/3), 8pm - An Evening with Groucho, featuring Frank Ferrante. $25/$10 students. When You Find Me • TH (3/29), 6:30-9:30pm - When You Find Me will be screened at the Biltmore Grande Stadium, 292 Thetford St., featuring Walter Arnold’s winning entry from Project Imagin8ion. Free. Registration required: can-

onashevillescreening@grey. com. Info: http://avl.mx/c7.

Seniors Lakeview Senior center 401 S. Laurel Circle, Black Mountain. Info: 669-8610. • TH (3/29), 11:15am - Seniors are invited to meet their local Tar Heel legislator to discuss issues relating to senior citizens. • TH (4/5), 9am-1pm - AARP safe driving course. $14/$12 AARP members. Registration required by April 3. Info: 669-8610. • MONDAYS through (4/23), 5:30-6:30pm - “Successful Aging” support group for seniors. Registration requested. SeniorSalt hymn Sing • TH (4/5), 9am-2:15pm - SeniorSalt Hymn Sings are an opportunity for seniors to gather for a morning of worship and fellowship. Participants will sing traditional hymns, read Scripture passages and hear the stories behind the songs. A buffet-style meal will follow. Hosted by The Cove at the Billy Graham Training Center, 1 Porter’s Cove Road. $25. Info and registration: http:// avl.mx/ce.

Spirituality “embody Light” Workshop and individual Sessions with cynthia Lane, (pd.) March 30-April 2. Embody your infinite truth in every facet of life, from consciousness to cells and atoms. Create the Light foundation for a physiology that knows itself as Light and functions accordingly. Free introduction, Friday, March 30, 7:30 PM. Contact Julene Cupp: julenecupp@gmail. com / 828-505-0400. www. firstlighttransformations.com a Barbara Marciniak channeling event april 27-28 (Friday-Saturday) (pd.) Barbara channels the Pleiadians who share their perspectives about our changing world. Lecture/ channeling Friday 7pm10:30pm: $35. Workshop/ channeling Saturday 10am6pm: $90. Cash or money order only. Ramada River Ridge Hotel, 800 Fariview Road, Asheville. Reservations recommended: (828) 2986300 or ashevilleclass@ yahoo.com asheville compassionate communication center (pd.) INNER EMPATHY 8 WEEK COURSE APRIL 19th Learn to hold empathy and unconditioned presence for yourself no matter what! Dynamic group format supports connecting deeply to

parts of yourself that hold core needs and beliefs. www.innerempathy.com astro-counseling (pd.) Licensed counselor and accredited professional astrologer uses your chart when counseling for additional insight into yourself, your relationships and life directions. Readings also available. Christy Gunther, MA, LPC. (828) 258-3229. Bharatanatyam classes (pd.) Bharatanatyam is the sacred classical dance form of India. Adult and children’s classes now forming. Traditional Kalakshetra Style. • DakshinaNatya Classical Arts. Riverview Station. • Call Tess: (828) 301-0331. Learn more: www.riverviewstation.com Mindfulness Meditation class (pd.) Explore the miracle of healing into life through deepened stillness and presence. With consciousness teacher and columnist Bill Walz. Info: 258-3241. www. billwalz.com. Mondays, 78pm – Meditation class with lesson and discussions in contemporary Zen living. At the Asheville Friends Meeting House at 227 Edgewood Ave. (off Merrimon). Donation. chant for the Planet • 4th SUNDAYS, 1-4pm - Soka Gakkai International invites the public to “chant for the planet” as part of this large and diverse Buddhist organization. Held at French Broad Coop, 90 Biltmore Ave. Free. Info: www.sgiusa.org. Divine energy Share

• 1st WEDNESDAYS, 6-8pm - All are welcome to participate in this Healing Circle, including reiki practitioners, other energy workers and non-practitioners curious to tap their healing potential. By donation. Meets at 60 Caledonia Road #B (the carriage house behind the Kenilworth Inn Apartments). Info: 707-2983. Finding Spiritual Success • SU (4/1), 11am-noon - A worship service encourages participants to “experience stories from the heart on finding spiritual success, beautiful music and more,” followed by fellowship and a pot-luck dinner. Held at the Eckankar Center of Asheville, 797 Haywood Road, lower level. Info: www.eckankarnc.org or 254-6775. grace community church 495 Cardinal Road, Mills River. www.graceinfo.org or 891-2006. • WE (4/4), 6:30pm - A Holy Week service will focus on the life of Jesus with music, reading and art. i ching • SUNDAYS, 4-5:30pm - An I Ching exploration group will offer an introduction to the practice, along with related readings at Panera Bread, 1843 Hendersonville Road. Free. Info and registration: 707-6206. Kashmir Shaivism • THURSDAYS, 7pm - Explore the nondual philosophy and practice of tantric Kashmir Shaivism with Madhyanandi. By donation. Info and directions: madhyanandi@gmail.com.

Lenten Study group • WEDNESDAYS through (3/28), 6pm - A Lenten study group will ask “Why Did Jesus Have to Die?” at Trinity Lutheran Church, 235 St. John’s Road, Suite 50, Fletcher. 5pm soup dinner precedes the discussion. Theme: “Father Forgive Them: The Cross as Reconciliation.” Registration requested. Free. Info: rhund@comporium.net or 507-2723. Modern Buddhism by geshe Kelsang gyatso • SUNDAYS, 7pm - Learn practical methods for developing inner calm during normal activities, with Buddhist teacher Sharon Lovich. This ongoing book club includes guided meditation, a talk and discussion. Join anytime. Held at Montford Books and More, 31 Montford Ave. $8/$5 seniors and students. Info: meditationinasheville@ gmail.com or http://avl. mx/bg. nurse christian Fellowship • 1st THURSDAYS, 6-8pm - Nurse Christian Fellowship provides a local, regional, national and international network to bring the message of Jesus Christ and a Christian worldview to nursing education and practice. Info: rchovey@sos.spc-asheville.org. Pray the Vespers • SUNDAYS, 7pm - The Asheville Orthodox Mission invites the public to pray the Vespers of the Ancient Orthodox Christian Church at 619 Haywood Road. Info: http://avl.mx/9s. Sacred embodiment center

Fi NE

4 B i l T m o r e Av e n u e Downtown Asheville 277-1272

Located at 41 Carolina Lane in Asheville. • TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS, noon-3pm - “Come-unity Time: Food, Healing and Soul Nourishment” invites the public to bring art supplies, instruments and food donations for a meal and community gathering. $5 meal/$3 soup. Info: www. thesacredembodimentcenter. com or 216-2983.

Located at 130 Shelburne Road. Info: www.unityofasheville.com or 252-5010. • TUESDAYS, 2-4pm - A Search For God A.R.E. Study Group. • SUNDAYS, 11am Spiritual celebration service. —- 12:30-2pm - A Course in Miracles study group.

toning for Peace • 1st SUNDAYS, 2-3:30pm - Toning for Peace will be offered at the Sacred Embodiment Center, 41 Carolina Lane. By donation. Info: 667-2967. trinity Lutheran church 235 St. John’s Road, Suite 50, Fletcher. Info: www. trinitylutherannc.org or 3574068. • SUNDAYS, 10am - Sunday services will be preceded by Bible study at 9am. • SU (4/1), 10am - Palm Sunday service. • TH (4/5), 6pm - Thursday evening service. • FR (4/6), 6pm - Good Friday service. • SU (4/8), 10am - Easter service. tuning the heart • FR (3/30), 7-9:30pm - “Tuning the Heart” will celebrate Sufi music, zikr, poetry, movement, sound and silence, along with “Dances of Universal Peace.” $15. A Saturday program will be offered for an additional fee. Info: tarana.wesley@ gmail.com or 683-5296. Unity church of asheville

Battery Park Writing group (pd.) Thursdays, 6:30 p.m. Battery Park Book Exchange & Champagne Bar. This group meets to write together and then share in a supportive atmosphere. Free! Contact Lisa at 691-5472 or tokyotaos@live.com for more info. a Short time to Stay here • FR (3/30), 7pm - Terry Roberts will read from his new book A Short Time to Stay Here during a prerelease celebration at the Marshall Library, 1335 N. Main St. Info: www.ashorttimetostayhere.com. Free. • SA (3/31), 2pm - An additional reading will be held at the Hot Springs Visitor Center, Highway 25-70. Free. • SU (4/1), 1pm - A final reading will be held at Hot Springs Resort and Spa, 315 Bridge St. Free. accent on Books 854 Merrimon Ave. Free, unless otherwise noted. Info: www.accentonbooks.com or 252-6255. • SU (4/1), 3pm - Katerina Whitley will read from her book Around a Greek Table. alice Fogel

HANDMADE

Spoken & Written Word

• FR (3/30), 7pm - Alice Fogel, Carl Sandburg Writerin-Residence, will participate in the Carl Sandburg Student Poetry Contest celebration in Blue Ridge Community College’s Patterson Building. Free. Info: www.nps.gov/carl or 693-4178. asheville community theatre Located at 35 E. Walnut St. Tickets and info: www.ashevilletheatre.org or 254-1320. • TH (3/29), 7:30pm - “Listen to This: Stories in Performance” will feature tales of spring break. Hosted by Tom Chalmers. $10. Buncombe county Public Libraries LIBRARY ABBREVIATIONS Each Library event is marked by the following location abbreviations: n BM = Black Mountain Library (105 N. Dougherty St., 250-4756) n EA = East Asheville Library (902 Tunnel Road, 250-4738) n EC = Enka-Candler Library (1404 Sandhill Road, 250-4758) n PM = Pack Memorial Library (67 Haywood Street, 250-4700) n SS = Skyland/South Buncombe Library (260 Overlook Road, 250-6488) n SW = Swannanoa Library (101 West Charleston Street, 250-6486) n WV = Weaverville Library (41 N. Main Street, 2506482) n Library storyline: 250KIDS. • TH (3/28), 7pm - Nadine Cohodas will read from her book Princess Noire: The

Tumultuous Reign of Nina Simone. Free. PM • Through SA (3/31) Regional crafts display. PM • TH (3/29), 6pm - Book Club: Out Stealing Horses by Per Patterson. SW • SA (3/31), 10am-4pm Sidewalk book sale. EA • TU (4/3), 6-9pm - Knit-nChain. SS —- 7pm - Book club: Empire Falls by Richard Russo. WV —- 7pm - Book club: One Second After by William Forschten. EC • WE (4/4), 3pm - Book club: Cutting for Stone by Abraham Verghese. WV —6-8pm - Knitting group. SW • TH (4/5), 6:30pm - Book club: On the Corner of Bitter and Sweet by Jamie Ford. BM city Lights Bookstore Located at 3 E. Jackson St., Sylva. Info: more@citylightsnc.com or 586-9499. • FR (3/30), 6:30pm Victoria Casey McDonald will present her history book Just Over the Hill. • SA (3/31), 2pm - Barbara Woodall will read from her book Not My Mountain Anymore and Amy Ammons Garza will read from Said the Leaf, with artwork by Doreyl Ammons Cain. Free. ekere tallie • WE (3/28), 8pm - Ekere Tallie will read poetry focused on radical justice, female empowerment and life in NYC after September 11. Held in Mars Hill College’s Spainhour Hall. Free. Info: www.mhc.edu or 1-866MHC-4-YOU. Firestorm cafe & Books Located at 48 Commerce St. Free, unless otherwise noted.

Info: www.firestormcafe.com or 255-8115. • SA (3/31), 1pm - Book club: The Man Who Quit Money by Daniel Suelo. Fountainhead Bookstore Located at 408 N. Main St., Hendersonville. Events are free, unless otherwise noted. Info: www.fountainheadbookstore.com or 697-1870. • TU (4/3), 5pm - Ann B. Ross will read from her Miss Julia novels. Malaprop’s Bookstore and cafe 55 Haywood St. Info: www. malaprops.com or 2546734. Events are free, unless otherwise noted. • WE (3/28), 7pm - Jessica Maria Tuccelli will read from her novel Glow. • SA (3/31), 3pm - Chaplain Steve Butler will read from his book We Do Remember You, about grieving the death of a child. • SU (4/1), 3pm - Poetrio will feature Ray McManus, Ed Madden and Anne Harding Woodworth. • MO (4/2), 7pm - Bridging Differences book club will discuss Born Round by Frank Bruni. • TU (4/3), 7pm - Judyth Hill will read from her books Men Need Space and A Presence of Angels. • WE (4/4), 7pm - Book club: Swamplandia! by Karen Russell. • TH (4/5), 7pm - Maureen Healy will celebrate the launch of her book Growing Happy Kids: How to Foster Inner Confidence, Success, and Happiness. Open Mic

JEWELRY

Specializi n g i n o n e- o f - a - ki n d a n d c u sto m j ewel r y DeBee r s & AG TA Sp ec tr u m Awar d-Winning D esi g n er / G o l d sm i th

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 7

consciousparty

fun fundraisers

a night in havana to benefit caring for children Where: Crowne Plaza ballroom, 1 Resort Drive, Asheville When: Saturday, March 31, 7-11 p.m. $100 for a reserved seat at a table. $75 general admission. Info: http://caringforchildrengala.com Why: Sultry women, exotic cocktails and hot dance moves are just a few of the hallmarks of 1950s Cuba. Travel back in time at “A Night in Havana,” all to benefit children in need. CARING for Children has helped children and families struggling with abuse, neglect, family conflict and mental-health issues since 1975. The organization offers transitional living programs for young women, a foster care program for children under 18, diagnostic assessments and several other services in Buncombe County. These are serious issues, but CARING for Children also knows how to throw a party. There will be Cuban-inspired drinks, food from local restaurants, Latin-infused jazz from Kat Williams, as well as dancing from the Maria Voisin Latin Dance Company. Everyone is encouraged to wear vintage clothes with an island theme as they dance to sexy Cuban rhythms and celebrate CARING for Children’s important work.

beneﬁtscalendar Calendar for MarCh 28 - april 5, 2012 Bachelor auction • SA (3/31), 8pm - A bachelor auction will benefit Tie to Thailand, an organization that works to fight human sex trafficking in Thailand. Held at Creatures Cafe, 81 Patton Ave. Bidding prices vary. Info: www. creaturescafe.com. coat Drive • FR (3/30), 4:30-8pm - A “spring clean” coat drive will be hosted by Eblen Charities at Ashley Furniture, 89 S. Tunnel Road. Info: eblenfound@aol.com or 242-2848.

i Scream for greenways • Through SA (3/31) - Ultimate Ice Cream will donate 100 percent of the proceeds from its “The Trail” ice cream to Connect Buncombe’s “Greenways, Please” initiative. Info: www.buncombecounty.org/ connect or www.ultimateicecreamasheville.com. Lawn and garden Sale • SA (3/31), 9am-6pm - Asheville Area Habitat for Humanity will host a lawn and garden sale to benefit MANNA FoodBank at 31 Meadow Road. Bring five non-perishable food

items for a 20 percent discount at the Habitat ReStore. Info: 254-6706. Pianist Jacqueline Schwab • TH (3/29), 7:30pm - Pianist Jacqueline Schwab will perform at The Altamont Theater, 18 Church St., to benefit the Blue Ridge Orchestra. $20/$15 in advance. Info: www.myaltamont.com. rugby Middle School 5K • SA (3/31), 9am - The Rugby Middle School 5K will benefit the Special Olympics of Hendersonville. Held at 3345 Haywood Road, Hendersonville.

Info: shenry@rug.henderson.k12. nc.us or 891-6566. Stickin’ it to Poverty • SA (3/31), 11am-3pm - Stickin’ It To Poverty will feature a “food-ona-stick” lunch to benefit the Whole Planet Foundation. Held at Greenlife Grocery, 70 Merrimon Ave. $5-$10 per plate. Info: www.wholefoodsmarket.com/stores/asheville or 254-5440. Winesdays • WEDNESDAYS, 5-8pm Winesdays wine tastings will benefit a different organization each week

Financing Available

• Insured • Over 30 Years Experience

658-2228

More benefiTS eVenTS online

Check out the Benefits Calendar online at www.mountainx.com/ events for info on events happening after April 5.

Calendar deadline

The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication. Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 365

The Permanent Solution To Clogged Gutters

Carpentry by Lucy • AGC Certified Master Residential Carpenter • NC Licensed Journeyman Carpenter • Residential and Commercial Remodeling • Interior Painting

at the Wine Studio of Asheville, 169 Charlotte St. $5. Info: www.winestudioasheville.com or 255-5955.

FREE GUTTER CLEANING with Gutter Helmet Installation*

America’s Most Trusted Brand for Over 30 Years! Call now for a FREE Estimate

*Applies to full home installation. Present coupon at time of purchase. Not good with any other offer. 1991

828-681-5555 • NeverCleanYourGutters.com

8 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

Loca lly Owned & Op era ted Since

• 1st WEDNESDAYS, 7pm - A spoken word open mic, hosted by Asheville Wordfest and Asheville Poetry Review, will be held at The Pulp, 103 Hilliard Ave. $10 includes membership fee. Info: www. ashevillepoetryreview.com or 225-5851. Public Lectures & events at Unca Events are free unless otherwise noted. • FR (3/30), 7pm - The Naked Author Jam will feature contributors from Naked Came the Leaf Peeper. Held in UNCA’s Humanities Lecture Hall. Info: 254-6734. Spellbound children’s Bookshop 21 Battery Park Ave. Free, unless otherwise noted. Info: ww.spellboundchildrensbookshop.com or 232-2228. • SU (4/1), 4pm - Royal Book Club: Across the Universe by Beth Revis. Synergy Story Slam • MO (4/2), 7pm - The Synergy Story Slam is an open mic storytelling event where the public can share stories, laugh, learn and build a stronger community. Theme: “Fools and Fooling.” $5-$10 suggested donation to benefit the WNC Alliance. Hosted by the Magnetic Field, 372 Depot St. in the River Arts District. Info: www. themagneticfield.com or 257-4003.

Sports Bike traffic Skills 101 • SA (3/31), 10am-4pm - “Traffic Skills 101,” for bicyclists, will be offered at TD Bank/Buncombe County Administrative Building, 200 College St. Bring bike, helmet, water bottle and snacks. $20; scholarships available. Info and registration: BuncombeBikeEd@ gmail.com. collegiate community triathlon • Through WE (3/28) - The Collegiate Community Triathlon will accept registration through March 28 for its March 31 race in Lake Lure. Info: www.setupevents.com. Dynamic Warm Ups for every runner • SA (3/31), 9am - A “Dynamic Warm Ups for Every Runner” workshop will be held at Jus’ Running, 523 Merrimon Ave. Free. Registration suggested. Info: miriamsalloum@hotmail. com or 252-7867. girls on the run SoleMates • Girls on the Run invites girls grades 3-8 to participate in group runs and fundraising opportunities as part of the SoleMates series. Info: www. gotrwnc.org.

introduction to Kayaking • THURSDAYS, 7:309:30pm - An introductory kayaking class will cover the basics of whitewater kayaking with Nantahala Outdoor Center instructors at The Grove Park Inn, 290 Macon Ave. Ages 10 and up. $40. Info and registration: (800) 232-7238. YMca Dodgeball tournament • SA (3/31), 6-10pm - Gather 8-10 teammates, 15 and older, to enter. Each team is guaranteed at least three games. Tournament will include free food, play for trophies and goody bags. A mini-dodge tournament for ages 12-14 will be held from 2-4pm. $120 per team. Held at 30 Woodfin St. Info and registration: tweaver@ ymcawnc.org or 210-9622. Youth Baseball • FR (3/30), 6-8pm; SA (3/31), 1-4pm - Registration for the Ted E. Tourists baseball program will be held at Dr. Wesley Grant Southside Community Center, 285 Livingston St. $30/$25 Asheville residents. Info: rshaw@ashevillenc.gov or 259-5483.

Volunteering asheville city Schools Foundation • Volunteers are sought for the Asheville City Schools Foundation’s reading and math programs. Prior teaching or tutoring experience preferred. Info: www.acsf.org or 350-6135. asheville Free Media • Asheville Free Media seeks volunteers for its local internet radio station. Be a DJ, plan events and be part of the community. Info: www. ashevillefm.org. Big Brothers Big Sisters of Wnc Located at 50 S. French Broad Ave., Room 213, in the United Way building. The organization matches children from single-parent homes with adult mentors. Info: www.bbbswnc.org or 253-1470. • Big Brothers Big Sisters seeks adult mentors for bimonthly outings. Activities are free or low-cost. Volunteers are also needed to mentor 1 hr./wk. in schools and after-school programs. Buncombe county Jail • Volunteers are sought for a variety of programs with inmates from Buncombe County Jail. Must be 21 years or older. Info: 9899459. cell Phone Donation • MONDAYS through FRIDAYS, 8am-5pm -

RiverLink will accept unwanted cell phones at its offices, 170 Lyman St. Info: www. riverlink.org or 252-8474. center for new Beginnings • The Center for New Beginnings seeks volunteers for community awareness and services for crime victims and survivors of traffic fatalities, suicides and other death-related incidents. Info: contact@centerfornb.org or 989-9306. children First/ciS Children First/CIS is a nonprofit advocating for children living in vulnerable conditions. Info: VolunteerC@childrenfirstbc.org or 768-2072. • Through TU (5/1), 2:305:30pm - Volunteers are needed at least one hour per week, Mon.-Thurs., to help K-5th graders with homework and activities. Info: VolunteerC@childrenfirstbc. org or 768-2072. council on aging • Volunteers are needed to drive seniors to doctor appointments as part of the Call A Ride program. Volunteers use their own vehicles and mileage reimbursement is available. Info: www.coabc.org or 277-8288. exhange Student hosts • Families are sought to host international exchange students. Must pass a background check and provide room and board. Info: www. ayusa.org or 298-8873. helios Warriors • Helios Warriors, a holistic therapy program for veterans, seeks volunteer licensed/ insured practitioners for a minimum of three hours per month. Volunteer administrative support also needed. Tues., Thurs., Fri. or Sun. Info: www.helioswarriors.org or 299-0776. Jewish community center • The Asheville Jewish Community Center seeks volunteers for party planning, receptionist duties and other projects. Info: rochelle@jccasheville.org or 253-0701. MotherLove Mentor • The YWCA MotherLove program seeks volunteers to provide support and encouragement to teen mothers. A commitment of eight hours per is month required. Info: 254-7206. new Opportunities thrift Store • The Opportunity House, 1411 Asheville Highway, Hendersonville, seeks donations for the New Opportunities Thrift Store. Volunteers also needed during store hours. Info: 692-0575.

riverLink events Info: www.riverlink.org or 252-8474. • Volunteers are sought to plan festivals, concerts and parties. Info: dave@riverlink. org or 252-8474. road to recovery • The American Cancer Society seeks drivers to transport cancer patients as part of its Road to Recovery program. Volunteers must be available weekdays and willing to use their own vehicle. Info: 254-6931. Smith-McDowell house • SA (3/31), 10am Volunteers are needed to clean and restore the SmithMcDowell House for Park Day. Held at 283 Victoria Road. Info: wnchavolunteers@gmail.com or 2539231. Southern appalachian repertory theatre • Ushers and marketing and fundraising volunteers are sought by the Southern Appalachian Repertory Theatre. Info: sartplays@aol. com or 633-1049. Upcycling Bin • Hip Thrift, 201 Haywood Road, will collect and distribute clothing as part of its upcycling program. Donations of old, stained or torn items will be turned into something new by local crafters. Clothes can be donated or picked up Tues.Sat., 11am-5pm. Info: info@ hipthrift.org or 423-0853. Young Parents Demonstration Project • Through MO (4/30) - The Asheville Buncombe Community Christian Ministry seeks volunteers to provide emotional support and guidance to young parents moving out of poverty. Info: 398-6995 or www.abccm. org/ministries/circles. YWca Stand against racism • Through FR (4/20) - Volunteers are sought for YWCA Stand Against Racism through April 20. Info: www. ywcastand.org.

Calendar deadline The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication. Questions? Call (828)2511333, ext. 365

newsoftheweird Who knew restrooms were so complicated? Back to Fundamentals: The multicultural Macquarie University in suburban Sydney, Australia, said the posters installed in its restrooms last year have helped instill toilet etiquette, The Daily Telegraph reported in January. (The lined-through figure of a user squatting on top of a toilet seat was apparently especially helpful.) Some students said the facilities were so foul they were using restrooms in a nearby mall instead. (Meanwhile, in San Francisco, a recent memo from the 785-member Lewis Brisbois law firm instructed employees to: clean urine from toilet seats, always take the farthest stall or urinal available, flush toilets to mask sounds (if desired), and avoid making eye contact in the restroom, according to the Above The Law blog.

Can’t possibly be true • In February, Louis Helmburg III filed a lawsuit in Huntington, W. Va., against the Alpha Tau Omega fraternity and member Travis Hughes over injuries Helmburg suffered last May when he fell off a deck at the fraternity house. Startled, Helmburg fell backward off the deck after Hughes tried to fire a bottle rocket “out of his anus” — and the rocket exploded in place. (The lawsuit doesn’t mention Hughes’ injuries.) • U.S. Immigration agents inside a $160,000 custom-designed Chevy Suburban, specially armored to protect them from roadside kidnappings, became sitting ducks last year after kidnappers forced the vehicle off the road near San Luis Potosi, Mexico, opened the door and fired 100 rounds inside, killing one of the two agents. According to a February Washington Post report, the Department of Homeland Security had failed to modify the vehicle’s factory setting, which automatically pops open the door locks when the driver shifts into “park.”

fresh / real / pizza / beer / music open for lunch & dinner

LIVE JAZZ THURSDAY’S

Alien Music Club

• When Rose Marks and her extended family of Romanian Gypsy “psychics” were indicted last year after a 20-year-run of duping South Floridians out of up to $40 million, victims were elated that justice might be at hand. (A typical scam, prosecutors said, was to take a client’s cash “to pray over it,” promising to return it but somehow never doing so.) In December, however, the Marks’ attorneys said several of the so-called victims had begun working with them to clear the family’s name (one reportedly paid Rose $150,000). According to the lawyers, these “victims” call the Markses “friends,” “life coaches” and “confidants,” rather than swindlers.

Inexplicable David Myrland, an anti-government “sovereign” now serving three years in federal prison for threatening the mayor of Kirkland, Wash., filed a federal lawsuit in February accusing various officials of conspiracy — specifically, “backwards-correct-syntaxing-modification fraud.” Each word of the original complaint, coded by Myrland as to part of speech, “proves” to him that the complaint was “fraudulent” and “handicapping,” the Seattle Weekly reported in February. (Random sentence from Myrland’s filing: “For the WORDS OF an ADVERB-SYNTAXGRAMMAR-MODIFICATIONS ARE with an USE of the SYNTAX-GRAMMAR with the VOID of the POSITIONAL-LODIAL-FACT-PHRASE with the SINGLE-WORD-MODIFIER AS THE: A, AS, AT, AM, BECAUSE (many words omitted) FACT by the VASSALEES.”) (“Sovereigns” generally reject the federal government, and Myrland did not explain why he expected a federal judge would have authority to help him.)

readdaily Read News of the Weird daily with Chuck Shepherd at www. weirduniverse.net. Send items to weirdnews@earthlink.net or PO Box 18737, Tampa FL 33679

Unclear on the concept • Jason Bacon, 41, was arrested in Eureka, Calif., in March after responding to a classified ad for a used motorcycle by offering to trade about $8,000 worth of home-grown marijuana for it. An officer said Bacon told a deputy, “I know you can’t sell it, but I thought it was OK to trade it.” • Kathleen Mathews was outraged that the local community could turn on her 26-year-old son, Jesse, who’d been charged with killing a Chattanooga, Tenn., police officer. Jesse, she said in a letter to the judge, is a “good man,” lamenting, “You do one little thing that pisses people off, and they want to hold it against you forever” (Chattanooga Times Free Press, February).

Our dynamic democracy • Oklahoma state Sen. Ralph Shortey, a staunch abortion opponent, introduced a bill in January to ban the use of human fetuses in processed food. Although the state’s leading anti-abortion advocate said he’d never heard of such a practice, Shortey said it was a problem he’d been reading about on the Internet. • In November, Kyle Bower, 19, won a seat on the Alburtis (Pa.) Borough Council. Before being sworn in, however, he was sentenced to probation for stalking an ex-girlfriend and tossing a brick through her window. He also still must answer to a 2010 charge of resisting arrest for public drunkenness in Kutztown, Pa. In both incidents, Bower displayed an uncanny ability to slip out of handcuffs and wander off.

Creme de la Weird Madeleine Martin, the chief animal-protection official for the state of Hesse, Germany, told a Frankfurt newspaper in February that one reason the country needs an anti-bestiality law is to combat “animal brothels.” Without such a law, authorities must prove that the animal has been physically harmed in order to obtain a conviction.

See Menu & Live Music Calendar: BarleysTaproom.com

BILLIARDS + DARTS + 28 MORE TAPS UPSTAIRS ? EVERY WEDNESDAY

DR. BROWN’S TEAM TRIVIA 42 B I L T M O R E A V E . D O W N T O W N A S H E V I L L E - 255-0504 - M O N -S A T 11:30 A M -?/S U N 12-12 mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 9

Eating Right for Good Health presented by

National Nutrition Month

wellness Asheville Community

yogA expAnds AbCCm direCtor goes to WAshington

“Get Your Plate (or bowl/glass/mug) in Shape!”

Leah McGrath, RD, LDN Corporate Dietitian, Ingles Markets

Change Up Your Protein Week 4

Protein is a key nutrient that builds and maintains our muscles and is important for all of our cell functions. When you say “protein” many people automatically think about animal sources of protein like red meat, pork, chicken, turkey, fish, and seafood but there are lots of ways that we can get protein in our diets by eating other sources of protein... so change up the protein on your plate! - Eggs - 6 grams of protein each - Milk - 8 grams of protein in 8 ounces - Cottage cheese, ½ cup - 15 grams - Yogurt, 1 cup - usually 8-12 grams, check label (Note: Greek yogurt has higher amount of protein) - Cheeses - 6-10grams/ounce - Tofu, ½ cup - 20 grams protein - Soy milk, 1 cup - 6 -10 grams

big scissors, big moment: Mike Hiers and O’Niel McCall look on as Michael Greenfield, director and cofounder of Asheville Community Yoga, cuts the ribbon that marks the center’s expansion. Photo by Caitlin Byrd

- Most beans (black, pinto, lentils, etc) - about 7-10 grams protein per half cup of cooked beans - Soy beans, ½ cup cooked - 14 grams protein Split peas, ½ cup cooked - 8 grams - Peanut butter, 2 Tablespoons - 8 grams protein - Almonds, ¼ cup - 8 grams - Peanuts, ¼ cup - 9 grams - Sunflower seeds, ¼ cup - 6 grams - Pumpkin seeds, ¼ cup - 8 grams - Flax seeds, ¼ cup - 8 grams

Leah McGrath: Follow me on Twitter www.twitter.com/InglesDietitian Work: 800-334-4936

30 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

by CAitlin byrd Before cutting the ribbon on Asheville Community Yoga’s expansion, Director Michael Greenfield bowed his head and said, “Namaste.” In yoga, this respectful expression is typically intoned at the end of each class. But for the Woodfin-based nonprofit, notes Greenfield, this is just the beginning. “We’re really able to offer more to the community in such a bigger way now,” he explains. “We’re going to be able to bring more awareness to yoga of all kinds.” The expansion includes an additional studio, two bathrooms, a kitchenette and a child care area. “We really wanted to be able to give specialized attention to all the students and do emotional and physical practices. We also wanted to bring in more yoga at prime-time hours like 6 p.m., and more beginner classes too,” he explains.

None of this would have been possible without community support, stresses Greenfield. In keeping with the principles of karma yoga, the center offers its classes for free, with a suggested donation of $5 to $15. “Karma yoga is selfless yoga. It’s giving without the intention of receiving: It’s about dedication to others,” explains Brian Deem, a teacher-in-training at the center. When Asheville Community Yoga began two years ago, it featured one instructor. Today, the center boasts more than 30 volunteer instructors and also offers teacher trainings and student immersions. “Although yoga’s not competitive, it had gotten very pricey, and people with no money just couldn’t afford to do it,” notes Mike Hiers, the group’s development director. “More than 4,000 people do yoga here.” And during the expansion, they did a lot more than that, sometimes volunteering more than 19 hours a day. “Three weeks ago, this,” says Hiers, the new studio space “was noth-

“We call VeteranS our humBle heroeS, BecauSe they Sacrifice monthS anD yearS of their liVeS for the principleS of thiS country.” — Scott rogerS, aBccm ing but a completely empty concrete hall, and cars were parked inside of it.” Today, the space boasts heated hardwood floors, ceiling fans and a storage cubby for yoga mats and props. “It’s all driven by the community, and one day we might be back to a small closet, but for now the community is saying this is what they want,” Hiers observes. More than 50 people watched as Greenfield cut the silver ribbon. “It was my brainchild, and now the community has accepted it and taken it in as their own, which is just wonderful,” he explains. Woodfin Mayor Jerry VeHaun attended the ceremony, along with Carol Rovello and O’Neal McCall, representing the Asheville Area Chamber of Commerce. Asheville Community Yoga is at 8 Brookdale Road in Woodfin.

reV. rogerS goeS to WaShington The Rev. Scott Rogers of the Asheville Buncombe Community Christian Ministry traveled to Washington, D.C., earlier this month to tell the Senate Committee on Veterans’ Affairs about his local approach to a national concern: homeless veterans. Last year, ABCCM found homes for 389 of the 437 veterans it served. Rogers credits this high success rate to the nine principles he shared with committee members. “I think one of the things that’s been part of the Veterans Affairs administration has been not to treat vets as program participants but to really embrace them as folks who simply need a new opportunity,” Rogers explains. ABCCM’s Veterans Employment and Training Services takes the same approach. Last

year, the program placed 302 veterans in the work force at a cost of about $1,000 a head — far below the $1,600 national average. And on average, ABCCM’s vets earned about $14 per hour, compared with a national average of $9.50 for vets hired through job-placement programs. In May, a U.S. Labor Department publication will feature ABCCM’s program as one of the four best nationwide. Rogers credits strong collaborations with the local VA Medical Center, the AshevilleBuncombe Homeless Initiative and the more than 40 partners in the Asheville-Buncombe Homeless Coalition — and, of course, the vets themselves. “We call [veterans] our humble heros,” notes Rogers, “because they sacrifice months and years of their lives for the principles of this country, and then they want to give back to their fellow soldiers and their community.” But it doesn’t end with finding homeless veterans a job and a place to live. “The purpose,” says Rogers, is to “help that veteran ... embrace their dreams and, through self-determination, their future and reintegrate back into society.” The women’s facility, Steadfast House, has a 73 percent placement rate, and the Veteran’s Restoration Quarters has a 76 percent rate of placement into permanent housing; the national average is 60 percent. And while Rogers appreciates the national exposure, nothing beats the satisfaction he derives from the work he’s done for 31 years. “We’re humble just to be able to serve our veterans,” he says, adding, “It’s a real honor to share what we’ve learned with the nation.” X

NEw FacE Jugs 64 Biltmore Avenue • Downtown Asheville Open 7 days • www.amerifolk.com • 828.281.2134

Send your local health-and-wellness news and tips to Caitlin Byrd at cbyrd@mountainx.com, or call 251-1333, ext. 140.

9^_d[i[

Ç?cf[h_Wb 9ekhjÈ CWiiW][ WdZ 9kff_d] J^[hWfo

By Jean Fight fatigue, age and lack of strength. Resist pain and speed recovery from illness. Beijing-trained Jean, Master of natural medical science and licensed massage therapist.

7ffe_djc[dj0 .(.#(//#))&+ '' H_Z][bWdZ BWd[" 7i^[l_bb[ mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012

wellnesscalendar Calendar for MarCh 28 - april 5, 2012

Wellness acceptance & Boundaries: the Keys to Loving Someone Difficult (pd.) Do you care deeply for someone who is hard to love? Call M. Wheeler, Counselor, 90- minute session for $50. 828-215-6653. admissions Open house (pd.) Daoist Traditions College of Chinese Medicine Friday, April 20th. 4-6pm 382 Montford Avenue, 28801. Free to public. Join us to learn about the admissions process and financial aid. RSVP 828-2253993 or admissions@daoisttraditions.edu For details visit www.daoisttraditions.edu are You trying to Force Yourself to change? (pd.) Emotional Brain Training (EBT) is a structured program that addresses the Emotional Root Cause of using Food, Alcohol/Drugs, Overspending, Overworking to feel pleasure, numb out, and/or comfort and soothe ourselves. • Create a healthy lifestyle that promotes self compassion, brain health and grounded joy. Call 231-2107 or empowering.solutions@yahoo.com or visit website: www.ebt.org Open house event at Daoist traditions college acupuncture clinic (pd.) It’s time for Spring Renewal! Get your energy flowing with Acupuncture and Chinese Medicine! Saturday, March 31st 1:00 to 4:00pm Seasonal Health Tips • Mini-Treatments Qi Gong • Pulse Diagnosis • Chinese Herbal Tea Free to the public.For more information call (828) 253-8669 or visit daoisttraditions. edu the reaL center (pd.) Offers life-changing classes in Relationship & Intimacy skills, Nonviolent Communication (NVC), Radical Honesty, and Somatic Awareness. Held in Asheville with Steve Torma, 828-254-5613, www. theREALcenter.org asheville community Yoga center Located at 8 Brookdale Road. Info: ashevillecommunityyoga.com. • SA (3/31), 2:30-5pm - A class on lower body alignment for all levels. $40 donation. —- 6:30-8:30pm - Kirtan yoga. By donation. avoiding Back and Spine Surgery • TH (4/5), 5:10-6pm - A program on avoiding back and spine surgery with advanced technology will be offered by Fairview Chiropractic Center, 2 Fairview Hills Drive. Free, but registration required. Info: 6287800. ayurvedic nutrition Workshop • SA (3/31), 3pm - Learn how to incorporate this time honored tradition into your lifestyle to increase energy, decrease stress, boost immune system, cleanse, replenish and more. Held at The Sacred Embodiment Center, 41 Carolina Lane. By donation. Info: http://avl. mx/cc. cholesterol Screening • TH (3/29), 8-11am - Park Ridge Health will offer free lipid and glucose profiles by finger stick, along with blood pressure mass index screenings, at the Flat Rock Ingles, 200 Highland Lake Road. For best results, fast overnight. Info: info@parkridgehealth.org or www. parkridgehealth.org. • TU (4/3), 8-11am - An additional screening will be held at Stein Mart, 213 Greenville Highway, Hendersonville. chronic Disease Self-Management • WEDNESDAYS, noon - Sick and tired of being sick and tired? Take charge of your health with this sixweek workshop for those with chronic health conditions and their caregivers. Held at Health Adventure in the Biltmore Square Mall, 800 Brevard Road,

Suite 620. $30 for series; scholarships available. Registration required: 251-7438. cooking with Diabetes • 4th WEDNESDAYS, 2:30-5pm - A class on cooking with diabetes will be held at Lakeview Senior Center, 401 S. Laurel Circle, Black Mountain. $10. Info: 2555522. creation health Series • TUESDAYS, 5:30pm - Following eight principles found in the Creation story, participants will learn the philosophy for living life to the fullest at any age, adapted to any lifestyle, during this eight-week course. Held at 50 Doctor’s Drive, Suite 2. Free. RSVP: 855-PRH-LIFE. Info: www.creationhealth.tv or info@ parkridgehealth.org. Detox, cleanse and revitalize with Foods • SA (3/31), 10am-noon - “Detox, Cleanse and Revitalize with Foods” will be offered at Natural Import Company, 9 Reed St. $30/$25 in advance. Info: 2998657. eat Smart, Move More • WE (3/28), 10-11am - Healthy Haywood Coordinator Steffie Duginske will present “Eat Smart, Move More,” a program on how to prepare regular meals at home, exercise daily and more at the Canton Branch Library, 11 Pennsylvania Ave. Program will include door prizes. Info: 648-2924. events at Jubilee! Located at 46 Wall St. Info: www.jubileecommunity. org or 252-5335. • TUESDAYS (4/3) through (5/8), 7-8pm - Qi Gong. $12 per class. events at Pardee hospital All programs held at the Pardee Health Education Center in the Blue Ridge Mall, Hendersonville. Free, but registration is required unless otherwise noted. Info and registration: www.pardeehospital.org or 692-4600. • FR (3/30), 2:30-4pm - Hip and knee replacement presentation. • TU (4/3), 8:30am - Henderson County Mayors’ Advocacy Council for those with disabilities. —- 13:30pm - Alpha 1 Antitrypsin Deficiency screening for those with emphysema or asthma. • TH (4/5), 3-4:30pm - “Sharp As A Tack,” a discussion about brain plasticity and how to prevent cognitive decline. Free health consultations • TUESDAYS, 1-6pm - The Faith Community Nurse will be at SOS Anglican Mission, 370 N. Louisiana Ave., Suite C-1, to discuss health concerns, assist with resources, provide free blood pressure screenings, pray with the public or “just spend time together.” Coffee and refreshments provided. Info: 768-0199. Free health Screenings • TH (4/5), 11am-2pm - Park Ridge Health will offer free measurements of body fat, hydration percentages, body mass index, height and weight for overall body composition, as well as blood tests for diabetes and pressure. Held at Tire Master, 2320 Spartanburg Highway, Hendersonville. Info: Info@parkridgehealth. org. headaches and Migraines • TH (3/29), 5:15-6pm - A program on headaches and migraines will be offered by Fairview Chiropractic Center, 2 Fairview Hills Drive. Free, but registration required. Info: 628-7800. Sound healing concert • 1st and 3rd SUNDAYS, noon-1pm - Linda Go vocalizes with Billy Zanski on gongs, chakra bowls, kora and melodic percussion at Skinny Beats Drum Shop, 4 Eagle St. Vibrational healing for all. Info: 776-3786. the red cross 100 Edgewood Road. Info: www.redcrosswnc.org or 258-3888. Appointment and ID required for blood drives.

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

• WE (3/28), 1:30-6pm - Blood drive: Care Partners, 68 Sweeten Creek Road. Info: 277-4800. • TH (3/29), 8am-12:30pm - Blood drive: Asheville Fire and Police Headquarters, 100 Court Plaza. Info: 259-5891. —- 1:30-5:30pm - Blood drive: Sand Hill Venable Elementary School, 154 Sand Hill School Road. Info: 670-5028. • FR (3/30), 7am-6pm - Blood drive: Mission Hospital, Kate B. Reynolds classroom on the Memorial Campus, 509 Biltmore Ave. Info: 213-2222, ext. 2. toxic vs. healthy Food • TH (3/29), 7pm - Dr. Edward Aronoff will discuss toxic and healthy food at Malaprop’s, 55 Haywood St. Free. Info: www.malaprops.com or 254-6734. Vinyasa Flow Yoga classes • MONDAYS, 11:45pm & WEDNESDAYS, 9am - Vinyasa flow yoga will be offered at the Jewish Community Center, 236 Charlotte St. $15 for 90 min./$12 for 60 min. Info: www.jcc-asheville.org. non-Surgical Weight Management info Session • 1st WEDNESDAYS, 11am-noon & 3rd THURSDAYS, 6:45-7:45pm - A non-surgical info session will be held at Mission Weight Management Center, 2 Medical Park Drive, Suite 102. Info: www.missionmd.org/weightmanagement or 213-4100. Yoga for cancer Survivors • THURSDAYS, 3:45pm - This class incorporates a series of poses that will increase flexibility, bring healing energy to the areas that need it most, calm the nervous system and relax the mind and body. Held at the Asheville Yoga Center’s Donation Studio, 239 S. Liberty St. Pay what you will. Info: www.youryoga. com. Yoga for Women • TUESDAYS, noon - This all-ages yoga class for women focuses on hormonal balancing and transitions, as well as the reproductive arc. Classes held at the Asheville Yoga Center’s Donation Studio, 239 S. Liberty St. Info: www.youryoga.com or rachael@ nourishinglife.com.

Support Groups adult children Of alcoholics & Dysfunctional Families ACOA is an anonymous 12-step, “Twelve Tradition” program for women and men who grew up in alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional homes. Info: www. adultchildren.org. • FRIDAYS, 7pm - “Inner Child” study group, Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. Info: 989-8075. • SATURDAYS, 9:45am - “There is a Solution,” Unity Center, 2041 Old Fanning Bridge Road, Mills River. Info: 749-9537. • SUNDAYS, 3pm - “Living in the Solution,” The Servanthood House, 156 E. Chestnut St. Open big book study. Info: 989-8075. • SUNDAYS, 2pm - “Inner Child” study group, 11 Pennsylvania Ave., Canton. Info: 648-2924. • MONDAYS, 7pm - “Generations,” First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Info: 474-5120. al-anon Al-Anon is a support group for the family and friends of alcoholics. More than 33 groups are available in the WNC area. Info: www.wnc-alanon.org or 800-2861326. • WEDNESDAYS, 5:45pm - Al-Anon meeting for women, Grace Covenant Presbyterian Church, 798 Merrimon Ave. at Gracelyn Road. • WEDNESDAYS, 11:30am - “Daytime Serenity,” Pardee Education Center at the Blue Ridge Mall, 1800 Four Seasons Blvd. —- 7pm - Grace Covenant Presbyterian Church, 798 Merrimon Ave. —- 8pm - “Listen and Learn,” St. John’s Episcopal Church, 339 S. Main St., Marion.

• THURSDAYS, 6pm - Al-Anon meeting for women, New Hope Presbyterian Church, 3020 Sweeten Creek Road. • THURSDAYS, 7pm - “Parents of Children with Alcoholism,” West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road. —- 7pm - Pinecrest Presbyterian Church, 1790 Greenville Highway at North Highland Lake Road, Flat Rock. —- 8pm - Fletcher United Methodist Church, 50 Library St., Fletcher. • FRIDAYS, 12:30pm - “Keeping the Focus,” First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. Entrance near Charlotte St. —- 5:30pm - “Family Matters,” First United Church, 66 Harrison Ave., Franklin. —- 8pm - “Lambda,” Cathedral of All Souls, 9 Swan St. • SATURDAYS, 10am - “One Day at a Time,” First Baptist Church, Buncombe and 5th Avenues, Hendersonville. —- 10am - “Grace Fireside,” Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. —- 10am - “Saturday Serenity,” St. Mary’s Episcopal Church, Charlotte Street at Macon Avenue. —- noon “Courage to Change,” Bess Sprinkle Memorial Library, Weaverville. • MONDAYS, noon - “Keeping the Focus,” First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. Entrance near Charlotte St. —- 6pm - “Attitude of Gratitude,” Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. —- 7pm - First Christian Church, 201 Blue Ridge Road, Black Mountain. A beginner’s meeting will proceed general meeting from 6:15-6:45pm on the 1st Monday of the month. —- 7:30pm - First United Methodist Church, Jackson and Church Streets, Sylva. —- 8pm - “Discovery,” Ledger Baptist Church, U.S. 226 near Bakersville. —- 8pm - Pinecrest Presbyterian Church, 1790 Greenville Highway at North Highland Lake Road. • TUESDAYS, 4pm - Grace Church, 242 Highway 107 N., Cashiers. —- 5:30pm - “Steps to Recovery,” Kenilworth Presbyterian Church, 123 Kenilworth Road. —- 7pm - “One Day at a Time,” First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. —- 8pm - Transylvania men’s meeting, Brevard-Davidson River Presbyterian Church, 249 E. Main St. Brainstormers • 1st & 3rd WEDNESDAYS, 6pm - Join this survivorled support group for brain injury/concussion sufferers and their allies. Meetings consist of sharing, listening and reflection. Held at Trinity UM Church, 587 Haywood Road. Info: 254-0507 or puffer61@gmail. com. Breast cancer Survivors and Friends Support group • MO (4/2), 5:30pm - Join survivors, friends and those at high risk for breast cancer for support and information. Held at the Park Ridge Health Breast Center, 50 Hospital Dr., #4B, Hendersonville. Info: 681-2917 or http://bit.ly/GDPPad. chronic Pain Support group • SUNDAYS, 12:30-1:30pm - Open to those with chronic pain and friends and family. Held at Unity Church of Asheville, 130 Shelburne Road. Donations accepted. Info: (770) 846-0651. co-Dependents anonymous A fellowship of men and women whose common purpose is to develop healthy relationships. • WEDNESDAYS, 7pm - First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Info: 367-0157. • SATURDAYS, 11am - First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Info: 779-2317 or 299-1666. connections group • Learn to strengthen relationships, improve selfawareness and build internal resilience during this 12-week course led by professional counselors. Based on the work of Brene Brown. Times to be determined. $40. Info: manifestcounseling.com or 258-5204. Debters and Underearners anonymous • MONDAYS, 7pm - The local chapter of Debtors Anonymous, a 12-step program, meets at Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road.

wellnesscontinued Underearners Anonymous meets at 8pm. Info: www. debtorsanonymous.org, underearnersanonymous.org or 704-299-8909. eating Disorder Support group • WEDNESDAYS, 7-8pm - Support group for adults at T.H.E. Center for Disordered Eating, 297 Haywood St. Meetings focus on positive peer support, coping skills and recovery tools. Led by licensed professionals. Free. Info: www.thecenternc.org or 337-4685. events at Pardee hospital All programs held at the Pardee Health Education Center in the Blue Ridge Mall, Hendersonville. Free, but registration is required unless otherwise noted. Info and registration: www.pardeehospital.org or 692-4600. • TU (4/3), 6:30-8pm - Bipolar support group. Registration not required. • WEDNESDAYS (4/4) through (4/25) - Vet Center Out Station, a support group for veterans. Registration required before attending first meeting. Info and times: 271-2711. • WE (4/4), 10-11:30am - Diabetes support group. Registration not required. Food addicts in recovery anonymous • THURSDAYS, 6:30pm - Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous, Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road. Info: 989-3227. grief Share • SUNDAYS, 2pm - A grief recovery support group will meet at Living Hope Community Church, 697 Haywood Road. Info: 450-7575. grief Support groups • CarePartners’ bereavement support services are available to anyone who has suffered a loss through death. Weekly grief support groups, a relaxation group, a Grief Choir, Yoga for Grievers and one-onone counseling available. Donations accepted. Info: kcaldwell@carepartners.org or 251-0126. LgBtQia Support group • 1st & 3rd TUESDAYS, 6pm - The Center for New Beginnings hosts a member-led LGBTQIA Support Group, featuring “conversations in a safe place,” at 34 Wall St. Free. Info: contact@centerfornb.org or 989-9306. Man to Man/Prostate cancer Support • TU (4/3), 7pm - Man to Man, a prostate cancer support group for men and caregivers, meets at American Cancer Society, 120 Executive Park, Asheville. Info: 254-6931. Marshall alcoholics anonymous Meeting • FRIDAYS, 8pm - AA meeting at Marshall Presbyterian Church, 165 South Main St. Info: soletpj@gmail.com. Memorycaregivers network Support for caregivers of loved ones who suffer from dementia and Alzheimer’s. Info: 645-9189 or 230-4143. • WEEKLY - MemoryCaregivers Network support groups are free and open to anyone caring for a person with memory loss. Groups meet at a variety of locations and times. Info: 230-4143 or network@ memorycare.org. • 1st TUESDAYS, 1-3pm - Seventh Day Adventist Church, 1141 Howard Gap Road, Fletcher. Info: Info@parkridgehealth.org. Mission Weight Management Surgical Support group • 1st & 3rd WEDNESDAYS, 6-7:30pm; 4th FRIDAYS, 10-11:30am - A Weight Management Surgical Support Group will meet at Mission Weight Management Center, 2 Medical Park Drive, Suite 102. Info: www.missionmd.org/weightmanagement or 213-4100. Overcomers classes • TUESDAYS - Overcomers support group, for those dealing with addiction and other life-controlling prob-

lems, will be offered in Mars Hill. Call for location and time: 689-9316. Overcomers recovery Support group A Christian-based, 12-step recovery program. Provides a spiritual plan of recovery for people struggling with life-controlling problems. Meetings are held at S.O.S. Anglican Mission, 370 N. Louisiana Ave., Suite C-1. All are welcome. Info: rchovey@sos. spc-asheville.org or 575-2003. • MONDAYS, 6pm - A support group for men and women. Overeaters anonymous A fellowship of individuals who are recovering from compulsive overeating. A 12-step program. • THURSDAYS, 6:30pm - Hendersonville: O.A. Step Study group, Cox House, 723 N. Grove St. Info: 329-1637. • THURSDAYS, noon - Asheville: Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road. Info: 277-1975. • SATURDAYS, 9:30am - Black Mountain: 424 W. State St. Open relapse and recovery meeting. Info: 669-0986. • MONDAYS, 6pm - Asheville: First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Info: 252-4828. • MONDAYS, 6:30pm - Hendersonville: Balfour United Methodist Church, 2567 Asheville Highway. Info: 800-580-4761. • TUESDAYS, 10:30am-noon - Asheville: Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. at Ottari. Info: 626-2572. Sexaholics anonymous • DAILY - A 12-step fellowship of men and women recovering from compulsive patterns of lust, romance, destructive relationships, sexual thoughts or sexual behavior. Daily Asheville meetings. Call confidential voicemail 237-1332 or e-mail saasheville@gmail.com. Info: www.orgsites.com/nc/saasheville. Single Parenting • SUNDAYS, 4pm - “Single and Parenting” support group features guest experts on a variety of topics. Held at Living Hope Community Church, 697 Haywood Road. Free. Info: livinghopeasheville@ gmail.com or 450-7575. the compassionate Friends • 1st MONDAYS, 7-8:30pm - The local chapter of an international support group for parents grieving the loss of a child meets at Arden Presbyterian Church, 2215 Hendersonville Road. Info: 693-4061. Wnc cesarean community • 1st MONDAYS - A safe forum for women and families to share their Cesarean birth stories and support others in the community with similar experiences. Meets from 10am-noon at 4th Trimester Family Center, 65 Hill St., and from 6-8pm at Spa Materna, 640 Merrimon Ave. Info: laurenhickman@live.com. Women of courage Sex and Love addicts anonymous • SATURDAYS, 10-11am - A 12-step recovery fellowship for women who want to stop living out a pattern of addictive sexual behavior and romantic obsessions. Meets at First Congregational United Church of Christ, 20 Oak St. Enter at front door of the annex. Info: http://slaafws.org or womenofcourageslaa@ yahoo.com.

Joint NC State Engineering Programs at UNC Asheville

for a B.S. Engineering Degree

unca.edu/engineering • 828-251-6640

Relax & Rejuvenate

5 Regent Park Blvd., Ste. 105, Asheville

Massage Therapy Center of Asheville Locally owned for 10 years Relax & Rejuvenate has some of the most knowledgeable and skilled therapists WNC has to offer. Specializing in Deep Tissue, Cranio Sacral, Hot Stone, Reflexology and Couples Massage

(828) 250-9077 • RelaxRejuvenate.com

10% Off with your Go Local card

THYROID PROBLEMS?

Do you suffer from thyroid symptoms such as fatigue, insomnia, hair loss, weight gain, or depression? NEW information reveals why this happens and how to finally get relief! Been treated without success? Been told to “live with it”? Tired of taking drugs that don’t fix the problem? Not getting any better? There is NEW hope. If you’re tired of dealing with this problem and worried about it getting worse, go to

www.AshevilleThyroidClinic.com Todd Stone, D.C.

to get free information explaining why you’re not better and how a new effective treatment is offering relief… without drugs.

We Put the Personal Back in, “Personal Care”

Private Duty In-Home Care Doesn’t Have To Break The Bank! Give

Stacie’s Personal Care Services a chance to meet your needs…

If you have long term care insurance, we will bill your insurance company for you • Experienced In Home Aides and CNA’s supervised by a registered nurse • All staff meet high standards & qualification requirements

• Personal Care • Light Housekeeping • Meal Preparation • Companionship • Transportation • Medication Reminders • Monitoring of Vital Signs

More WellneSS eVenTS online

Check out the Wellness Calendar online at www. mountainx.com/events for info on events happening after April 5.

Calendar deadline

The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication. Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 365

Weaverville Office 10 South Main Street - Unit B Weaverville, NC 28787 Office Phone: 828.484.8440

Celebrating Our 6th Year Covering 9 Counties

Waynesville Office 367 Dellwood Road Stonegate Building A3 Waynesville, NC 28786 Office Phone: 828.452.6992

1-866-550-9290 • Visit Us at: www.staciespcs.com mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012

food

the main dish

hiDDen eaterieS

of aSheVille finDing fooD in the StrangeSt of placeS by mackensy lunsford photos by max cooper Asheville’s eateries are making big news these days. You know the usual suspects — Tupelo Honey often garners nods from big-name media including Southern Living and the Chicago Tribune. Wellknown writer John T. Edge (a contributing editor for Garden & Gun Magazine, among other things) was recently found eating at both The Admiral and White Duck Taco Shop (The Admiral’s staff received a factchecking call from G & G shortly thereafter). Also, a film crew from the Cooking Channel was recently in town, following Cucina 24 chef Brian Canipelli around as he prepped in his kitchen early one Sunday morning for one of the Blind Pig supper club’s events. The crew filmed the entire dinner, too. And speaking of Blind Pig, the New York Times recently interviewed founder Mike Moore about the local food scene. Oh, and not only was Katie Button of Cúrate recently a candidate for a James Beard Award (unfortunately, she’s no longer a finalist), she was nominated by Food & Wine Magazine for a people’s choice award for young, rising-star chefs. It’s enough to make one dizzy, trying to keep up with it all (trust us). That’s why we’ll take a break from the tastemakers in the spotlight to highlight some of the lesser-known, hidden gems of Asheville. Speaking of hidden, this week we’re focusing on restaurants tucked inside other businesses. This is by no means a comprehensive list. Want to nominate some of your own favorite hideaway eateries for coverage? As always, you can reach us at food@mountainx.com. Happy hunting.

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

mirch maSala Hidden inside of Cintom’s Custard, Mirch Masala is a blink-and-you’llmiss-it location for solidly good kebabs, tikkas and parathas. The home-style Punjabi menu is honest fare, made from scratch in a tiny kitchen behind the custard machines. Owners Naila and Ayaz Malik hail from Pakistan and originally wanted to open an Indian grocery store, but when the owner of Cintom’s offered up his kitchen space, the unique combination of frozen custard shop and Indian restaurant was born.

Stick it to ya: Mirch Masala specializes in home-style Punjabi cuisine like this dish of kebabs and pilau.

Prices here are quite reasonable, hovering around the $5 mark for entrees. A full platter, including a grilled item, vegetable or dal of the day, rice, roti, raita and salad, costs $8.99. “Everything is made in small batches and nothing comes frozen,” Ayaz says. “There’s nothing pre-made. That’s where the flavor comes from.” 3080 Sweeten Creek Road, mirchmasala.350.com, 279-8580.

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 5

taQueria con cuiDa The Grey Eagle Tavern and Music Hall is no stranger to hosting restaurants in the belly of its bar. It’s housed the ill-fated Yamamma’s Snaqueria (back in the day), the excellent Twin Cousin’s Kitchen (oh, how we miss your springtime crawdad boils) and Roots, which has recently closed its cafe (though it continues to do a brisk wholesale business, with hummus appearing in Ingles stores this year). The latest in the line of inner-bar eateries is Taqueria con Cuida, specializing in (you guessed it) tacos. The menu is short and sweet — not to mention affordable. Tacos are $2 each and include fillings like

taco, taco: Offerings at Taqueria con Cuida include cheap(ish) and good eats, like this al pastor-style pork taco, served with a kale salad and pico de gallo.

pulled-pork carnitas, al pastor pork or seitan, borracho (drunk) chicken and a housemade vegan lentil chorizo. A simple burrito with meat, rice, beans and cheese is $5. And you can wash it all down with one of the Mexican sodas for just a buck. Oh, and with a $10 minimum order, con Cuida (meaning “with care”) will deliver their brand of fresh Mex to your doorstep. 185 Clingman Ave. 352-TACO, taqueriaconcuida.com

6 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

nouriSh & flouriSh Juice Bar On Depot Street in the River Arts District is a studio called Nourish and Flourish, a center for healthy living that features Nia workshops, spinal care, massage — and also a juice bar that’s open to the public. Drinks include purifying tonics like the manzanita with apple, celery, fennel, kale and lemon. And if

Beets my heart: The manzanita gets its vivid color from beetroot.

you’re really serious, you can enroll in the center’s juice-cleanse program, which offers approximately a gallon of juice a day, a few evening classes to speed along detoxification and a recipe book. 347 Depot Street, nourishflourishnow. com, 255-2770.

little Bee’S thai rite-aiD SanDWich counter

calorie counter: Behind the line at the Rite-Aid sandwich counter.

Sure, short-order eateries can be found in various other chain retail shops — Target has one for example. But none that we’re aware of can boast the anachronistic charm of the lunch counter in the Merrimon Avenue Rite-Aid. It’s equipped with not much more than a tiny deep-fryer, a griddle, a microwave, a hot plate and a number of counter-side stools, in use for more than 40 years.

surviving the transition of Eckerd’s to Rite-Aid. The restaurant seems to have also held on to its prices, offering hot dogs with the works for $1.49, and egg, tuna or chicken salad sandwiches for $2.69. Want a veritable bucket of cherry-vanilla Coke? You can get that here too. The counter is open Monday through Saturday, from 8 a.m. (yes, they serve breakfast) until 2 p.m.

Most of these drugstore eateries were phased out in the ‘70s, but this lunch counter held on, even

846 Merrimon Ave. 252-1866, riteaid. com.

thai one on: Simply called “Thai spicy noodle” on the menu, this dish will light you up.

Don’t eat here. Well, you should eat here, but in many ways, we kind of wish you wouldn’t. Getting fed at this tiny restaurant is a notoriously long and arduous process, thus we’re rather conflicted about offering this disclosure in the first place: Little Bee’s offers easily the best Thai food in WNC. Located inside a rather nondescript Exxon gas station in south Asheville, the restaurant offers only a few scattered tables. The counter where the ordering takes place is hilariously close to sugary gas-station cappuccinos and Technicolor slushies, offering a wild juxtaposition to the unfailingly authentic food that’s turned out by the chef and owner of Little Bees, a woman who prefers to go simply as “Took.”

Took’s skills are absolutely no joke. The beef salad is outrageously Thai spicy, the kind that tickles before the satisfyingly lush wave of pain. For sadists and serious spice lovers only, it’s a gratifying dish for those who crave traditionally spicy food that’s un-Americanized. The tom kha is perfect, with actual galangal rather than ginger, and the pad thai will bring you to your knees. But please — don’t eat here. For more, visit littlebeethai.com. Since the food here is made with serious attention to detail, it’s highly recommended that you call ahead and be prepared to wait: 681-0710.

Opening Special sophisticated scratch-made food from the earth

25% Off (free consultation)

love

magic

•

smoke

fire

165 merrimon avenue | 828.258.7500 | www.plantisfood.com

call TOday! Start LOSing tOday.

676-1511

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 7

smallbites

by mackensy lunsford send food news to food@mountainx.com

Bellyful: Joshua Armbruster with the food truck he owns with his wife, Capuchina Taylor. Photo by Max Cooper

pho for your face Joshua Armbruster and his wife, Capuchina Taylor, are bringing Vietnamese to the people. Their Phoyabelly food truck now serves at the Lot (Asheville’s new food-truck food court at 51 Coxe Ave.) on Thursday and Friday nights and all Saturday. Starting May 1, hours will expand further. Armbruster and Taylor both have cooking experience, but none of it was in traditional Vietnamese restaurants, Armbruster says. “I’ve done different elements of Vietnamese in a lot of different restaurants. Funny enough to say, but the [most] experience I have is in cooking French food. French food has influenced Vietnamese food so much, especially the things that I’m doing,” he says, referencing the confits, pates and stocks that he builds his dishes with. “It’s all really rooted in the fundamentals of French cooking, but using the Vietnamese palate.” Phoyabelly sells spring rolls and bahn mi hoagies with the real-deal pork pâté (although tempeh is also an option) and pickled vegetables. The duo also offers a rich pho with a complex base of meaty broth, made low and slow. “The ability to have really good broth in this town is great,” Armbruster says. The vegetarian version of the pho gets an umami-filled boost from local mushrooms. “In Asheville, you have to offer the vegetarian option, especially when it’s something that’s good,” Armbruster says. “Doing a dish that’s flavorful and can be enjoyed by both the vegetarian and non-vegetarian is very important.” While pho is fine, Armbruster looks forward to running special dishes utilizing various cuts of meat, like the spicy bun bo hue. “It’s a spicy pork, beef and shrimp broth with different charcuterie in it — it’s just beautiful,” he says. Though other restaurants in the area serve their own versions of pho, Phoyabelly is currently the only place to sample a wide array of Vietnamese options. And how does it feel to be the only game in town? “I imagine that won’t be forever,” Armbruster laughs. “Exclusivity doesn’t usually last that long in the restaurant industry.” For more, visit phoyabelly.com.

8 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

eat yours: Vegetables are good for you. That’s just one of the many reasons to get thee to a farmers market this spring. Photo courtesy of ASAP.

new farmers market comes to asheville A new farmers market is set to open in Leicester at 4 p.m. on Saturday, March 31, says John Bennett of Beulah Farms. The Leicester Farmers Market will be held at 338 New Leicester Highway on Friday evenings from 4 until 7 p.m. and Saturday mornings from 7 a.m. until about 2 p.m. The market will grow to include 25 vendors and will be held year round, says Bennett. The market will offer produce, baked goods, fresh fish from the coast and cheese from local artisans Three Graces Dairy. Bennett will sell grass-fed beef and pasture-raised pork from his Leicester farm. Other vendors include John’s Berry Patch, Finally Farm (specializing in organic herbs and vegetables), Randall Cove farm with produce and pastured pork and Goldner Farm with eggs and vegetables. Bennett is a former stock broker and military officer, Christian minister, author and motivational speaker. Bennett’s wife is a retired elementary school principal and an avid gardener. Both have doctorate degrees, but prefer the life of farming and advocating for other farmers. Bennett decided to organize the market to give farmers in his area an alternative source of income. “There are several farmers markets in our area, but they all seem to be kind of closed societies,” he says. “If you weren’t already in them, it would be hard to get in. And I said, ‘Well, I know how to do this. I can start my own.’ I knew we needed one in the Leicester area, and I knew that a lot of small farmers did not have a place to market their products. A lot of people that would farm couldn’t because they didn’t have a place to [sell] what they grew. So, we started this thing to provide a place for not just us, but other farmers that were in the same boat.” For more information about the market, contact John Bennett at 284-3421.

Organic, vegan bulk meals cooked with care by Chef Shane Casto and delivered to your home or office in the Western North Carolina area. Our meals are heart healthy, cholesterol free, and taste great. We strive to use all local and organic ingredients. An entire weeks worth of food is only $70 (plus tax.) BEST

All nutritionAl PRODUCT & BEST PRICE informAtion IN TOWN! provided

$40 off

1st montH’S order promo code: mtnX

828-645-3336 www.veginout.net

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 9

Healing with Horses A Teen Grief Support Group Please join us for two days of sharing and learning with horses! This will be a unique opportunity to explore your individual grief experiences and discover new ways of moving forward and coping together. Come experience how horses can help you during YOUR journey. Part 1: Saturday, April 28, 2012 • 8am - 4pm Part 2: Saturday, May 5, 2012 • 9am - 2:30pm

Sponsored by:

Both Sessions will be held at Jeter Mountain Farm in Flat rock, NC. registration deadline is april 4. Limited to 8 teens only. Call Susan Bumgarner for more information:

692-6178

New & Used Books CDs, DVDs, Video Games, Books on CDs Comics & Vinyl LPs BUY - SELL - TRADE

us on Facebook to: • Learn about sales • Get the scoop on newly arriving merchandise • and lots more!

D NE D OW E Y AT LL ER CA OP LO &

Th e in Ha th pp e ie Un s iv t P er la se ce

Scan QR Code or Search “Mr. K’s Used Books & CDS–Asheville”

2011 Asheville Wing War 1st Place People’s Choice for Specialty Wings SUPER SUNDAY: All The Weeks Drink Specials in 1 Day All Sunday Long! MON: $5 Pain Killers TUES: $2.50 Drafts & Highballs All Day Long WED: $4 Letter J Liquors

THUR: $3 Micro & Import Bottles FRI: $5 Jager Bombs SAT: $5 Tiki Bombs

NEW HAPPY HOUR MENU $5 AND UNDER 5-7PM EVERY DAY

LATE NIGHT KITCHEN

5PM - 1AM 7 DAYS

87 Patton Ave. 828-255-TIKI 0 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

allez cuisine! 12 Bones’ Thomas Montgomery and crew hope to smoke Thomas Ward and the rest of the Fig folks (get it?) in the WNC Chefs Challenge on April 3. Photo by Matt Rose

foodwire Wnc chefs challenges on a roll WNC Chefs Challenges continue at the Century Room at pack’s tavern. Week one (Tuesday, March 20) pitted Storm rhum Bar’s chef Owen McGlynn against Square one café’s chef Rob Keener in a culinary battle over the secret ingredient, local cheese. Storm Rhum Bar emerged victorious with the help of one of the judges’ favorite dishes of the evening: a salad of shaved fennel, beets, orange supremes, feta-buttermilk dressing, microgreens and shaved tomme (a semi-hard cheese). Week two (March 27) pitted Boca’s chef Stewart Lyon and team against chef Peter Fassbender at highland lake inn (visit mountainx. com/dining to see the results of that competition). Next week’s competition (Tuesday, April 3) looks to be a hot one, featuring chef Thomas Montgomery and the rest of the Bones Smokehouse talent versus the fig Bistro crew, headed by Thomas Ward. Want to go? Chefs Challenge dinners are $49 per person. Reservations can be made by calling Pack’s Tavern at 225-6944. For more about the competitions, visit avl.mx/cb.

taking it to the street Anthony Cerrato’s new restaurant, Strada (Italian for street), is coming along at a rapid clip. The Italian eatery, located at 27 Broadway St. in downtown Asheville, should be open by the time you read this (at press time, it was slated to open on Tuesday, March 27). stradaasheville.com.

the Duck expands its hours Beginning April 1, the White Duck taco Shop will be open six days a week for lunch and dinner (11:30 a.m. to 9 p.m. Monday though Saturday). The taco shop has also increased patio space (perfect for sangria-sipping). 1 Roberts St. whiteducktacoshop.com.

outstanding Once again, the market place’s William Dissen has been selected to participate in this year’s Outstanding in the Field at east fork farm in Marshall. Outstanding in the Field is an outdoor dining experience that takes place on farms, fields and other outdoor arenas around the world. The event isn’t until Sept. 19, but we wanted to let you know because tickets go fast. For more information about the event and to purchase tickets, visit outstandinginthefield.com.

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 41

eatininseason

Lunch Buffet 7 Days A Week

the CSa CoMMunity

FarMerS work to oFFer everything FroM produCe to loCally raiSed FiSh by Maggie CraMer

80 S. Tunnel Rd., Asheville, NC (Across from Best Buy)

828-298-5001 • www.indiagardenonline.com

ASAP’s CSA Fair is here, March 29; find more details below. This article is the second in a two-part series profiling farmers who will exhibit that are new to CSAs. Find the first, which focused on longtime CSA farmers, at Eatin’ in Season online.

CoMMunity eatin’ After only one season of farming, Joe Evans of Paper Crane Farm in Marshall knew he wanted to start a Community Supported Agriculture program. “I want to connect with more people on the food front,” he says. “CSA members provide a crucial supporting role … They’re an extension of the farm, keeping it alive when nothing’s really growing — at least in the soil.” Evans developed an interest in agriculture while volunteering for organic coffee farms in Central America. From there, he worked on farms in the West before moving to WNC to hone his skills as an intern. “I never left,” he says. “The farming community here is super supportive and has enabled me to farm on my own.” Of course, being a new farmer is not without its difficulties. “The biggest challenge for me is being a sharecropper [a landowner allows Evans to farm the land in exchange for a percentage of the crop],” he says. “It does have its advantages, too, but sometimes you wonder, ‘Will I even be farming here next year?’” Meghan Cole also knows the challenges of being a new farmer. In 2006, she received a degree in environmental studies with a concentration in sustainable agriculture from Warren Wilson College. After managing a CSA farm in California, she headed back to WNC and branched out entirely on her own as Harvest Table Farm in Old Fort. “There’s been a steep learning curve [in] establishing a relationship with the new land, new equipment, new customers and community, reacclimating to the climate of the Southeast in general and discovering the microclimates for the area where I farm,” she says. But, for Cole, the customers and community are what it’s all about. This year is her second season, so she already knows how CSAs create the community connection Evans is looking for. “CSAs help folks connect with the food that they eat — where it was grown, how it was grown and who grew it. I have also found that CSAs help to inspire food traditions and encourage members to share recipes and to connect with one another.” She adds that last year her customers regularly emailed her in excitement about their box’s content and to share favorite recipes. “I love it when I see folks getting excited about vegetables!” she says. “Sometimes my members are my cheerleaders if they know I’m working through difficulties on the farm.”

42 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

Choose your veggie: ASAP’s CSA fair will let people connect with farmers ... and vice versa. Photo courtesy ASAP

rah rah veggieS “Our area has changed drastically in the last 10 years,” says Alan Salmon of Wildwood Herbal Farm in Weaverille, recognizing the growth in a community ready to cheer for local food. Salmon and his family have been in business more than 30 years. While they’ve always focused on providing greenhouse plant starts and herbs, three years ago they began growing vegetables as well. And this year, they’ll offer a CSA for the first time. “We realized through networking that there were a lot of people we could reach with our fresh vegetables,” Salmon says. So, their son, Seth, who recently graduated from Appalachian State with a degree in alternative energy, is returning to the farm to try out the new venture. The family will also start a new aquaponic program this year to begin raising tilapia. They hope to have fresh fish by October to include as an option for farm share

members (and retail customers). Their CSA is officially called Flying Fish Farms. “It’s a learning curve for everyone — for us and the customers, too,” Salmon says, clearly more excited than nervous. “We’re doing this to make our farm more sustainable, to develop another aspect of our farm and let our son build his own customer base.” Flying Fish will be a “market-style” share, a new trend in CSAs. In Flying Fish’s case, customers will come out to the farm on Friday afternoons and pick out what they’d like for the week, including add-ons like meat, eggs and breads from others in the local food community. Evans will also offer a market-style share this year (along with a traditional CSA). “It gives members a direct choice in what they consume, and it means they don’t lose a share if they don’t come one week,” Evans says, adding, “It’s the member’s

new CSa FarMS Aardvark Farm, Bee Tree Farm, Blue Meadow Farms, Cane Creek Asparagus Company, Cane Creek Valley Farm, Firefly Farm, Full Sun Farm, Gaining Ground Farm, Gladheart Farm, Harvest Table Farm, Hominy Valley Farms, Ivy Creek Family Farm, Jake’s Farm, Long Valley Farm, Paper Crane Farm, Ten Mile Farm, A Way of Life Farm, Whispersholler Farms, Wildwood Herbal Farm, Winter Sun Farms

responsibility to use up their credit before the year’s end. No rollover here!” Cole will again offer a traditional-style CSA, with pickups for weekly boxes of produce she selects and compiles at the Black Mountain Tailgate Market, the West Asheville Tailgate Market and in Old Fort. This year, she’s added potatoes, sweet potatoes, okra, garlic, sunflowers and more melons, winter squash and pumpkins to her offerings. And, she’s created an online forum space for members to “connect with one another and share recipes, help with share pick up and more.” In other words, it all comes back to community. “In working for other farms that have offered CSAs, I’ve seen some truly great relationships develop,” concludes Evans. “CSA members are like a family member of the farm. I mean, they’re definitely closer than cousins. When was the last time you shared food with your cousin?”

Find theSe FarMS at the Fair Paper Crane Farm, Harvest Table Farm and Wildwood Herbal Farm (Flying Fish Farms), are just three of 20 CSA providers exhibiting at ASAP’s second CSA Fair, a free event on March 29 from 3 to 6 p.m. at the Grove Arcade in downtown Asheville. Find a full list of participating farms above and more information online at asapconnections.org/csafair.html. Farmers will be on hand to discuss their offerings, the costs of their shares, and other details. Many will also sample their farm products and offer other surprises. “For us, food is our art as well as our craft,” says Evans, teasing about an “interactive, educational aspect” of Paper Crane’s booth. Did you miss the CSA fair? Browse the nearly 100 area farms offering CSAs in ASAP’s online Local Food Guide at buyappalachian.org. Paper Crane Farm can be reached at soilseeker@gmail.com or 689-5860. Harvest Table Farm harvesttablefarm.com can be reached at info@harvesttablefarm.com or 772-4206. And Wildwood Herbal Farm can be reached at sethsalmon@gmail.com or 645-4342. X

TUESDAY— ¹/₂-off local beer WEDNESDAY— ¹/₂- price wine by the glass

THURSDAY— Retro Happy Hour $5 Retro Cocktails

(i.e. tom collins, manhattans, champagne cocktails)

FRIDAY— Live Music with

Patrick Fitzsimons

SATURDAY— Live music with Ben

Hovey (jazz, electronica)

RESTAURANT & LOUNGE

20 wall street 252-4162 www.marketplace-restaurant.com

Kubo’s Ja pa n e s e s u s h i & F u s i o n F o o d

5 B B i l t m o re Ave nu e • A s h ev i l l e • 2 5 1 - 1 6 6 1 • w w w. k u b o s j a p a n e s e - a s h ev i l l e . c o m

hot sake special Buy 1 Hot Sake Get 1 for 1¢ Every Sun., Mon., & Tues.

8#, 131&' 640

MERRIMON

AV E .

SUITE

205,

D AY S

LUNCH

ASHEVILLE

•

DINNER

828-225-6033

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 43

satyrs

the

hunting

down

in 1964, four teenagers created one of asheville’s greatest garage-rock bands their only known recording is a vinyl collector’s dreaM. but just who were the satyrs?

by Miles britton It all started with a mysterious, old 45. Local DJ and record collector Whitney Shroyer stumbled across it four years ago in a Hendersonville junk shop. The label read simply: “Don’t Be Surprised” / The Satyrs / Produced by High Fidelity Sales / Asheville, N.C. When he plunked the needle down on the turntable, he knew he’d found something special. “It just gave off this energy,” says Shroyer. “It’s an amazing song, and an amazing performance. Especially during the breakdown, when the band is screaming and the drummer is whomping the living hell out of everything in sight.” Crudely recorded, with plaintive vocals and a wild, teenage abandon, it’s the epitome of ‘60s garage rock. But what’s most amazing about The Satyrs record isn’t the sound. It’s where it’s from. “It’s extremely unique,” says Greg Cartwright, local garage-rock connoisseur and frontman for Reigning Sound. “In the mid’60s, Asheville was not some big booming town with a large middle class and lots of suburbs, which is generally where the teenage bands from that time came out of. I was convinced when I first moved to Asheville that [a garage scene] never happened here.”

44 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

Barely a handful of people across the U.S. own a copy of the 45. There’s a record collector in Philadelphia, and another in Connecticut. It’s easily one of the most rare and cherished 45s of their collection, they say. And like Shroyer and Cartwright, ever since they came across it, they’ve had the same question. Just who were the Satyrs? So Xpress went to go find out. Armed with nothing more than the band name and a scanned image of the record, we figured it would be a daunting, damn-near impossible, task. But thanks to Facebook and the librarians at the North Carolina Room of Pack Memorial Library, in just a couple of days we managed to track down one Bucky Hanks, Lee H. Edwards High School class of ‘65, former singer/bassist for the Satyrs. (Not to be confused with a different garage band with the same name that formed a few years later in New Jersey.) Hanks still lives right here in Asheville. He’s a bluegrass musician and an Episcopalian priest at a church on Riverside Drive. Sixty-five years old, with a salt-and-pepper beard and a recurrent chuckle, he was thrilled to sit down and reminisce about Asheville’s (surprisingly) vibrant garage scene of the ‘60s. Though he admits that he’s a bit baffled to be talking about a recording, not to mention a band, that he hasn’t thought about in more than 40 years.

well, don’t be

“To be quite frank, I wasn’t aware that anyone was still playing it,” Hanks says with a laugh. “We were 16-, 17-year-old kids. It never would have even crossed my mind that any of those records were out there floating around. Or that people even knew about it.” For Hanks and his bandmates, those rock ‘n’ roll days lasted just a few short years, from about 1964 to 1966. A brief window, yes. But, fortunately, not forgotten.

surprised, girl Spurred on by Lennon/McCartney, who were just a few years older than the Satyrs, it wasn’t long before the Satyrs started trying their own hand at songwriting. “I was bored, sitting at home one afternoon,” says Hanks, “noodling on my dad’s piano — I was not a pianist, but I was noodling around — and this little chord progression came together. I had listened to quite a bit of Lennon and McCartney by that time, so this little Beatles-y sounding thing of ‘Don’t Be Surprised’ came out in an afternoon.” He closes his eyes and sings a bit of the refrain: Don’t be surprised, girl / When I say you’re my girl... And the girl? Now that, Hanks can’t quite remember anymore. “It was just one of those teenage charmer situations,” he says. “I would stay up late at night and journal. I would write poetry. I was captivated by people like Jack Kerouac, John Lennon, Bob Dylan.” “Don’t Be Surprised” became an immediate hit with their fans when the band started including it in their set list. Pretty soon, other local bands were asking if they could cover it. Hanks laughs. “We’d say, ‘Sure, have at it, who cares.’”

Meet the satyrs It was the beginning of 1964. Recently appointed President Lyndon B. Johnson had just begun covert military operations against North Vietnam. The Beatles, still relatively unknown in the U.S., were watching their single “I Want to Hold Your Hand” climb toward No. 1 on the American charts, just a few weeks shy of their first trip stateside for the Ed Sullivan Show. And in the little mountain town of Asheville, N.C., four high-school musicians — Jeff Phillips (guitar/vocals, 18), Bucky Hanks (bass/vocals, 17), Bruce Smith (drums, 17), and Rick Haynie (lead guitar, 16) — were forming their latest project, the Satyrs. Most of the members had known each other for years. Hanks, Phillips and Haynie grew up together in West Asheville, back when it was a small, blue-collar neighborhood with a few restaurants and a couple of soda shops. They met Smith when they started attending Lee Edwards (now Asheville) High School. Like most teenage bands in the early ‘60s, the Satyrs started off playing covers. Chuck Berry, Little Richard, Fats Domino, Ray Charles — all those great artists who played their rock ‘n’ roll primal, passionate and raw. “We were drawn more to the black rock ‘n’ roll, the ‘soul music’ of the time, than Elvis and that sort of stuff,” says Hanks. “But as the Beatles became more and more prominent, we began to incorporate a lot more of their tunes in there.” Of course, the Satyrs encountered one major obstacle: finding a place to practice. “We were loud,” Hanks says, laughing. “Needless to say, we were not welcome at a lot of the homes. I remember one place that was the basement of a friend of ours, and it had a dirt floor. When it was damp, I don’t know how we kept from being electrocuted.” But practice they did. And over the next two years, the Satyrs averaged a show a week, playing anywhere that would pay them. Dressed up in Beatle boots, stovepipe pants, collar-less coats, with their “long” hair combed forward past their eyebrows, they often shared the stage with other popular rock ‘n’ roll bands from around town, acts like Bee Bumble and the Stingers, the Royal Spades and the Fabulous Wunz. The best gigs were when they got hired to play for kids their own age: high school dances, private parties, sock hops, country clubs, “teen-night spots” (aka dry, chaperoned rooms where kids would come to dance). On a good night they could rake in $20 apiece. Rick Haynie, the former Satyrs guitarist who

a 40-year-old fluke

the band, froM left to right: jeff phillips (face obscured by guitar neck), rick haynie, randoM guy with arMs crossed, bucky hanks. now lives in Alabama, remembers a particularly raucous show they played at Lee Edwards. “The auditorium was absolutely jammed,” says Haynie. “I don’t know how many people that auditorium holds, but it was standing-room only. They called us out for an encore, and we did Ray Charles’ ‘What’d I Say,’ and Jeff rips open his shirt and falls on his knees, singing. The place just went berserk. It was the first time my mother had ever seen me perform in a band, and she couldn’t believe it. She said they were carrying girls out who were fainting. When we finished playing, there was so much screaming and people going crazy, that, really and truly, I thought I was one of the Beatles.” The Satyrs, as with the other teenage garage bands in town, were no strangers to the bar and club scene. Even though they were a year or

two shy of legal drinking age, they played then well-known venues like The Pines, The Brown Derby, The Sky Club and The Ozark, not to mention rough-and-tumble spots like The Riverboat Lounge and The Amboy Lounge. Places that, if they existed nowadays, wouldn’t even let them past the door. “I don’t know if we were ever asked how old we were,” Hanks says, laughing. “I don’t think the question ever came up. We just showed up, played our music, got the money and left. I’m sure our parents didn’t care for some of the places their kids were playing. But we were an adventuresome sort. We played some places where, looking back on it, I don’t even know that I would want to do that now. And I don’t know if I had better sense, if I would have done that then.”

The recording of “Don’t Be Surprised” happened almost by accident. One of Hanks’ schoolmates had a relative who co-owned a stereo equipment store on Biltmore Avenue, near where the Orange Peel is now. High Fidelity Sales sold record players, needles, speakers, amplifiers, anything you needed for your home sound system. They also happened to be looking for local bands to record, using their equipment, at no cost to the band. “Being poor kids, we said sure, we’ll jump at that,” Hanks says. “It really was a total fluke.” And so the bizarre story of that mysterious 45 begins. “It was a very cold, winter night,” Hanks says. “We gathered all our stuff up and took it down there to Hi-Fi Sales one evening after hours. All they did was set up a little reel-to-reel recorder — it wasn’t even a multi-tracker — and a couple of mics. The fellow who did the recording, I don’t think he had ever recorded before, other than maybe just to tinker with it. He just said, ‘OK, you guys play.’ And so we did. We were there for probably three, three-and-a-half hours.” The band recorded two songs that night: “Blue Blue World,” a slow, spooky crooner, and the charmingly chaotic “Don’t Be Surprised.” Everything was done live, right there on the showroom floor. No overdubs. No producer. Just the band playing the songs over and over until they got it right. Or as close to right as possible. “I don’t think we were satisfied with the cut of ‘Don’t Be Surprised,’” Hanks recalls. “At the very end of the thing, Jeff said, ‘Can we do it one more time?’ And the guy that was doing the recording

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 45

Hanks probably had the most successful, post-Satyrs music career. He became a full-time bluegrass musician, playing banjo with David Holt and a number of well-known acts like the Midnight Plowboys, the original Piney Mountain Boys (with Ralph Lewis), and Bo’s Bluegrass Band. He still plays fairly regularly, too, most notably in Runners of the Green Laurel, a group he formed a few years ago with his two sons. And in all those years, there never once was talk of reuniting the Satyrs. “We never really found that much of a need or a necessity,” Hanks says. “Those who were interested in playing, played. And from time to time we all got together and did things together. But it never crossed our minds to put the old band back together.”

sounds like teen spirit

Modern tiMes: hanks and phillips at voltage records. “when we finished playing, there was so Much screaMing and people going craZy, that, really and truly, i thought i was one of the beatles.” said, ‘No. I’m tired. We’ve done it enough. If we don’t have it by now, we don’t have it.’” So with their last take finished, the band packed up its gear and left. And that was pretty much it. A few weeks later, each band member received a complimentary copy of the 45, which High Fidelity Sales must have gotten pressed. But why, or how many, Hanks has no idea. In fact, the entire thing is still a bit of a mystery to him. “I don’t know what [their] intentions or plans were,” he says. “I think they may have been very naive about the recording industry, and the business end of it. To think that you could press something like that and put it in a little retail store and sell a bunch of them, that’s a pipe dream for sure. Because it really was more of a demo, I would say, than anything.” Not that the Satyrs much cared. “To tell you the truth, we basically just dismissed it,” Hanks says. “Because we weren’t selling them, we weren’t trying to sell them. It never went anywhere. We never heard anything about it.” About a year later, the Satyrs did get a chance to record again, this time at a real studio down in Greenville, S.C. But Hanks has no idea what happened to those tapes. Which, looking back, he’s fine with.

“That original recording had a certain chutzpah,” says Hanks. “The next year when we recorded ‘Don’t Be Surprised’ at Mark V Studio [in Greenville], it was the same song, and it was a good, much more technical take, but it lacked the vitality that the Hi-Fi Sales recording had. If you’re looking for just raw energy, something that just screams ‘Here’s a bunch of kids playing for the sheer joy of it,’ then our little Hi-Fi Sales thing captures that better, even though it’s certainly not the slick recording. But boy, it sure yells 17- and 18-year-old, testosterone-laden music!”

goodbye satyrs

hello vietnaM

Not that any of it would have mattered anyway. Because by 1966, the Satyrs’ days were numbered. “In ‘66 and ‘67, if you were walking and talking, Uncle Sam wanted to visit with you,” Hanks says. “We were all very concerned about what was going to happen when we graduated high school. Were we going to be able to keep the band together? Or were we going to be drafted?” Phillips was the oldest. To avoid the draft and

46 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

fulfill his service requirement, he joined the Coast Guard in ‘66. When he left, the Satyrs quickly fizzled out. Over the next year, the remaining members kept playing music, always with the dark cloud of the draft hanging over their heads. Like Phillips, Hanks tried to join the Coast Guard after he graduated, but was turned down for a physical deferment. Smith ended up joining the marines and serving in Vietnam. He made it back to Asheville a few years later, safe and sound. But he was one of the lucky ones. “I lost a lot of good high school friends,” Hanks says. “It was a tragedy.” Eventually, when the war started winding down, all four bandmates found themselves back home. But by then, things had changed. Beatlemania was over. “We were all in other areas of music,” Hanks says. “We we’re still good friends. We got together, we socialized. And we played some together.” In the early ‘70s, Haynie got an offer to play house guitar at a club in Alabama. He still lives there. Phillips became a radiology technician at Mission Hospital. He’s now semi-retired and living in Old Fort, just past Black Mountain. Smith and Hanks continued to play in dance and jazz bands until the mid-’90s. They still run into each other from time to time.

The Satyrs. A couple of teenage kids in Asheville, playing during a brief, burst of a local garage-rock scene that lasted barely two years. With one, single 45 — recorded after hours in a tiny, electronics store — to their name. Yet somehow, across the U.S., the songs of the Satyrs live on. “It’s pretty amazing,” says Greg Cartwright, “there are just so few relics from that period.” Cartwright himself owns a 45 by the Fabulous Wunz, the other known garage record from Asheville. “Unless you lived in Asheville during that time, you would probably think [a garage scene here] never happened. It’s cool that young kids growing up and playing rock music now, to know that there is a legacy here that reaches back that far.” In the ‘60s, thousands of teenagers were putting together garage bands. And they produced thousands of great 45s, many of which still exist. But, man, there’s just something special about the Satyrs. “I love everything about ‘Don’t Be Surprised,’” says Whitney Shroyer, who frequently spins the Satyrs 45 on Saturday nights at the Admiral, where he DJs with Cartwright. “The recording, the wacky backup vocals, the peculiar structure of the song, that wild intro, the drumming. It’s a truly wonderful performance. I’m just proud that the No. 1 Asheville garage band record is so quirky and out of the ordinary. It’s very true to the town.” As for Hanks? Well, he lost his copies of that 45 long, long ago. And honestly, he’s just amazed that anyone still cares. “I don’t want to burst anyone’s balloon that may be dwelling in that rarefied air of garage bands,” he says, “But, let me just put it this way, it wasn’t that big a deal. For us, we were a bunch of kids in high school having fun. But, you know, for its time, it had a lot of that teen spirit to it.” “How it ever found it’s way into people’s record collections,” he says, laughing and shaking his head, “That I’ll never know.” X Miles Britton is an Asheville-based freelance writer.

IT’S WORTH THE DRIVE!

20-Year Anniversary April 1st

Bar-B-Q,Music,River Games Trips Down the French Broad

10am–5pm

Unﬁnished Furniture Finishing Supplies Art • Lamps Accessories & MORE!

BareWood Furniture & More

Owners Roberta & Michael Wessells invite you to visit the new store location, NOW at the Laurel Park Shopping Center!

828-697-7038 • barewoodmarket.com 1723 Brevard Rd. • Hendersonville, NC

NEW

LOCATION!

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 47

arts X music

Crittermania!

$30 StuDeNt MASSAgeS March 26-30

LoCaL pSyCh-pop revivaLiStS unLeaSh their gritty SpLenDor on new 7”

Discounts Available

by Dane Smith

APPly Now!

675 hour Massage Certification Program Accepting Applications for April 2012 AshevilleMassageSchool.org • 828-252-7377

“Where Beauty Comes Naturally”

Authentic Beauty LLC presents

WAXING SPECIAL! for the month of March

20% OFF

There’s an epidemic ravaging the streets of Asheville. Exposure leads to reckless abandon, an insatiable hunger for psychedelic retro-pop, uncontrollable shaking and an accelerated heart rate. Local residents are advised to exercise caution: The Critters are highly addictive, and the only respite from Crittermania is more Critters. Luckily, afflicted citizens can now ease withdrawal in the comfort of their own homes. The Critters finally have a record. It’s been a landmark year for the band. In addition to recording, The Critters played Bele Chere and The Orange Peel (along with dozens of other local shows), filmed a session for Moog’s AHA AVL series, earned honors in Xpress’ Best of WNC readers’ poll and cemented a well-deserved reputation as one of Asheville’s most unpredictable live acts. Visions of Light, the band’s debut 7”, may be short (clocking in at just under 12 minutes), but it’s packed with the raucous energy and jangly pop sensibility that defines the band’s often contradictory sound. True to the Critters’ kinetic performances, the album opens with a ferociously catchy riff and bouncy 4/4 drum line that pairs the raw aggression and gravelly vocals of The Stooges’ “Search and Destroy” with the simplicity of The Kinks’ “You Really Got Me.” Drummer Josh Martier’s songwriting is gritty and infectious; his song sinks like an anchor in the subconscious. But beyond that, the Critters is a true collaboration. All four musicians write, sing and swap instruments. “Goodbye Over Again” mellows the pace into a breezy ballad, showcasing Harry Harrison’s sunny psych-rock, complete with a Doo-wop melody and backing harmonies fit for an early’60s prom. Even the choppy indie-pop of Tom Peters’ “Soft Birdhouses,” the most modernsounding track, fits comfortably in the Critters’ throwback sound. The EP closes as rowdy as it began, with the grisly blues, howling solos and

1 in 4 young people will get an STD. Get yourself tested today.

ALL WAXING

FRIDAYS AND SATURDAYS and

ALL FIRST TIME BRAZILIAN WAXES

$35

Regularly $65 call now for free consultation

Walk-ins Appointments

$10 Off first visit

*new patients only

Affordable Birth Control and Condoms

828.505.3288

or book online: waterlilysalon.com 7 beaverdam road, asheville, nc

Call the doctor: The Critters’ throwback sound has been known to cause intense cravings. Photo by Max Cooper 828-252-7928 • 603 Biltmore Ave.

48 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

chest-caving toms of “Pappy,” from Martier and guitarist Jesse Meyers. There are clear influences at play on Visions of Light. But the band plays heavy in all the right parts, and the combined effect is irresistible. It’s a peek at the Critters broad palette — touching on garage, punk, early rock ‘n’ roll, psychedelia, blues and even modern indie-pop. Nonetheless, Martier says the band is anxious to follow with a full album, if only to put the older material to rest. “It’s really hard to move on to new stuff with all this other shit kind of lingering,” he admits. “That’s definitely one of my goals, to try to get it somewhere, recorded. I think it’s taken a long time for us to release something legitimately, but I feel like we’re going to follow it up really quickly with one or two other things, like a full length. We’ve been in the studio the past few months, and we have 15 songs recorded.” Until then, the band will continue belting out the full catalog at its frantic live shows. Peters and Martier agree that the over-animated Harrison, who flails wildly around the stage, deserves credit for much of the energy. “I feel like if Harry notices people not having a good time, he goes insane and he’s willing to do absolutely anything,” Peters says, as Martier laughs in agreement. But Harrison isn’t the only one willing to go to extremes for the sake of a good show. Just ask management at The Orange Peel. In August, during a local showcase, Martier made an indecent appearance after an attempt to utilize the full extent of the venue’s amenities. In the middle of a shower backstage, he was abruptly called to begin the set. “So I just put on a towel and went out,” he says matter-of-factly. “It wasn’t premeditated. But after like a second of the song, the towel fell off …” The nudity went mostly unnoticed. But the sound man, the rest of the band and select members of the audience were all treated to a full-frontal peep show.

what

The Critters, with Zombie Queen and The Treatment

where

The Get Down

A Special Artists International Recording Event with an authentic bluesman that has actually lived it…

JOHN MCVEY

"The Toughest Guitar Player in Texas."

when

Real Blues Magazine

Saturday, March 31 (9 p.m.)

Management, predictably, was not amused. “Apparently there was some guy who was ready to tackle me with a towel or a blanket or something because they were freaking out,” Martier says. “I was like, ‘I’m sorry man.’ But I’ve gotta say, that’s the most comfortable you can be playing drums.” If the thought of male nudity makes you blush, don’t be discouraged. Prior to its release party at The Get Down, the Critters will perform a toned-down, acoustic set at Harvest Records, almost certainly guaranteed not to include nudity. Just don’t be confused if the Kiss Country van is parked outside. Peters has mounted a half-serious campaign online calling for the local country station to broadcast live from the performance. “I didn’t want to do yet-another Facebook event for the in-store, so I was like, this can be a funny way to do it,” explains Peters. “But also, what if they come. ... I think I’m going to get something together and formally email them. Because when you’re out somewhere and you see the Kiss Country bus or van outside of, like, Wild Wings, you know something’s going down. This is an event.” X

THE ALTAMONT THEATRE 18 Church Street Asheville Event will be filmed and recorded. ONLY 150 PERSON CAPACITY!

7:30pm $10

TICKETS

(828) 348 - 5327

Event underwritten by ARTISTS INTERNATIONAL

Dane Smith can be reached at dsmith@mountainx.com.

ORGANIC GARDENING

STARTS HERE

Aaron Price

Seeds & Plant Starts Soils Fertilizer Pest Control ASHEVILLE 45 Banks Avenue

collaborations with; Kat Williams Acoustic Syndicate Kellin Watson Hollywood Red

James Cloyd Jr. collaborations with; BB King Albert King Sons Seals Otis Rush Detroit Blues Band Larry Davis La Bobby Bland

Frosty Smith collaborations with; Lee Michaels Jimmie Vaughn Junior Brown Rare Earth George Clinton Texas Tornadoes Sweathog

828.253.4112

www.fifthseasongardening.com

ALL ORGANIC...ALL THE TIME

www.artistsii.com mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 49

arts X dance

keeping everyone

on their toeS

keigwin + CoMpany’S

FaShion-Forward

take on Modern danCe by alli MarShall “I consider myself a collector,” says Larry Keigwin, artist director of New York-based contemporary dance group Keigwin + Company, who perform at Diana Wortham Theatre March 30 and 31. “I collect a lot of ideas and movement vocabulary, and then I edit.” Keigwin also collects photos of clothing, store windows, vintage apparel and anything else that catches his eye. When choreographing a dance, “it all goes into the pool,” he says In a 2010 video about the creation of “Bird Watching,” Keigwin explains that some of the poses were derived from models in vintage Sears catalogs. “One juxtaposition I like playing with is pedestrian, everyday vocabulary versus very technical dance vocabulary,” says the choreographer. Keigwin, a Hofstra grad, danced freelance for several New York City companies before settling in as associate director for Mark Dendy’s Dendy Dancetheater. He also danced on Broadway for the Metropolitan Opera. But, as a child, Keigwin wasn’t a Billy Elliot in the making. According to a New York Times article, he studied gymnastics and joined a circus-training program. By the time he did make it to a dance class, MTV had become the hatching ground for upstarts, so Keigwin landed a job as a backup dancer in a few episodes of the program Club MTV, says the Times.

50 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

dance dance revolution: Choreographer Larry Keigwin pairs technical moves and “everyday vocabulary.”

And, while today’s Keigwin + Company (founded in 2003) is not the stuff of Downtown Julie Brown and Hammer pants, the dance troupe’s pieces reference pop culture, fashion, street style and night life. “I think that art work is a reflection of the creator’s personality,” says Keigwin. “I have a friendly, approachable personality and so do the dancers I work with.” He says that sometimes modern dance can take itself very seriously and there have been instances of critics deeming his work superficial. “But then the next thing I create is not superficial,” says Keigwin. “I like to keep everybody on their toes. I don’t think we just create one thing: We’re a very versatile company.” When Xpress spoke to Keigwin, he was in Wellington, choreographing a new ballet for Royal Ballet of New Zealand. The new work involves fashion, which sounds fun but, “It’s completely trial and error and it makes me nervous,” says the choreographer. For the New Zealand ballet company, Keigwin bought dresses in vintage stores and some don’t have the flexibility required for the dancers movement. No problem: “I think that necessity is the mother of invention and

sometimes I have to trust that,” says Keigwin. “In those moments I’ll have the dancers take the dresses off.” Keigwin is no stranger to taking risks. He’s worked with Radio City Rockettes and with the band/performance act Fischerspooner. But perhaps the most interesting collaboration in the one Keigwin shares with his dancers each time he creates a new work. “I’m interested in dancers who have the ‘wow’ factor, who really sparkle in the room amongst others, have the personality and the physical technique, but they also have to be people who are interested in the creative process and are creative thinkers and doers,” he says. In a video posted on the company’s web site, Keigwin explains that the process involves proposing creative assignments like, “I need a phrase that represents an awkward relationship, and they go to work.” Then, “I feel like my control is in how I sew it all together, but I really enjoy setting a playful climate in the studio,” says Keigwin. His hope is that the pieces “exist in a unique world” and, he says, “I try to create vocabulary that fits in that world and that is authentic.” While choreography is about reinvention, Keigwin also responds to reallife movements like walking, running and skipping. “Some of those physical things are so recognizable,” he says. “So often dancers are put on a pedestal because they are acrobats of God, but I also like to bring it down to earth once in a while.”

who

Keigwin + Company

where

Diana Wortham Theatre

when

Friday and Saturday, March 30 & 31 (8 p.m. nightly. $35 general, $30 students. dwtheatre.com.)

The dances that Keigwin + Company will bring to Asheville have diverse origins. “Caffeinated,” says Keigwin, “came about from the fact that I was always holding a cup of coffee, so I decided to keep the coffee cup as a prop.” “Love Songs,” a series of six duets, was inspired by the chemistry between the dancers involved in the creation. And the there’s “Male Quartet,” a new piece that the dance troupe will preview at Diana Wortham before debuting it at the Joyce Theatre in Manhattan. “I’m one of four boys, and there are probably some parallels from my own family,” says the choreographer. As for letting Asheville have the first look: “I have a New York season coming up in June and it just makes sense to test drive it out or town and work out the kinks,” says Keigwin. “It’s a luxury.” X Alli Marshall can be reached at amarshall@mountainx.com.

Extra room for memories.

585 TUNNEL RD. ASHEVILLE, NC 28805 • 828-298-9600 • WWW.PRESTIGESUBARU.COM mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 51

arts X music

your dreaMS May or May not be

the anSwer to your prayerS MoSeS atwood

releaSeS one

bright boat by aMi worthen

Healing The Whole Self

â&#x20AC;˘ Life Transitions â&#x20AC;˘ Relationship Issues â&#x20AC;˘ Increase Self Esteem â&#x20AC;˘ Addiction Recovery â&#x20AC;˘ Sexuality/Sex Therapy â&#x20AC;˘ Career/Financial Support â&#x20AC;˘ Trauma/Grief/Loss Support â&#x20AC;˘ Anxiety/Depression/Stress

Licensed Psychotherapist L.C.A.S.

28 Years Experience

Right Choices for Positive Change

Moses Atwood is seeking the timeless. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I try to write music that you might not know when it was written,â&#x20AC;? says Atwood about his new release, One Bright Boat. â&#x20AC;&#x153;So I wanted to record in the same way.â&#x20AC;? Many musicians strive to create a sound thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s both nostalgic and fresh. In Atwoodâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s case, he more than succeeded. One Bright Boat resonates with a warm, wooden timelessness, thanks to Atwoodâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s organic, spontaneous recording and songwriting techniques. Falling into the broad category of Americana, One Bright Boat recalls the music of Van Morrison and Randy Newman, and at times has an R&B/ New Orleans feel. The lyrics are a mysterious poetry born of empathy and wonder. Vivid descriptive images interplay with intriguing metaphors. The stories Atwood tells on One Bright Boat take the listener from Maine to Louisiana, from California into the landscape of the psyche. Asked about his songwriting, Atwood says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t go into it with any kind of preconceived ideas. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s very much the method of bringing things out of my imagination. So itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a continual process of improvisation and mumbling nonsense until something works, and then Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll try and fit more pieces together. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s usually long after the fact that I get a sense of what the song is about.â&#x20AC;? Moreover, Atwood rarely writes anything down when working on a song. â&#x20AC;&#x153;You know how sometimes if you have a great idea you get kindof frantic about it â&#x20AC;&#x201D; you want to write it down or turn on a recorder, like itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just gonna flutter or go off,â&#x20AC;? he explains. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s almost like to spite that instinct, I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t write things down. Because I assume that the stuff thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s worthwhile will come back a lot of the time, and thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s proved to be true.â&#x20AC;?

who

Moses Atwood, with Johnsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Crossroad

www.edentantra.com 828.367.GROW Group classes with edutainer, Spycey Spyce, start April 16!

what

CD-release for One Bright Boat

where

Lexington Avenue Brewery (LAB)

when

Friday, March 30 (9:30 p.m. $10. lexavebrew.com)

52 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 â&#x20AC;˘ mountainx.com

get down, Moses: Atwoodâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lyrics are a mysterious poetry born of empathy and wonder. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a continual process of improvisation and mumbling nonsense until something works,â&#x20AC;? he says.

As a songwriter, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re the luckiest when your train of thought or your thread doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t snap until you have something that is complete enough to be something,â&#x20AC;? Atwood says. When it comes down to it, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Songwriting is what I consider my craft (much more than being a musician).â&#x20AC;? That said, Atwoodâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vocal and instrumental contributions (guitar, piano, dobro) are strong in the foreground of One Bright Boat. His resonate baritone, reminiscent of bluesfolk legend Abner Jay, lends an emotional depth of the songs. Atwood assembled an impressive group of musicians for the recording, which was produced and engineered by Bill Moriarty (Dr. Dog) at his Waking Studio in Philadelphia. Utilizing the talents of Michael Libramento (drums, guitar, keys) Matt Smith (pedal steel), Justin Ray (trumpet) and Jacob Rodriguez (sax), One Bright Boat features inventive playing and a strong groove throughout. One Bright Boat manages to achieve that elusive balance between being too tight and too loose. That might be because it was recorded in less than a week. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I am beginning to be more vehement about my dislike of the way people record now, and how itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s become the norm to take everything apart and then break it down and put it on this grid and multi-track everything,â&#x20AC;? Atwood admits. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I feel that it robs all sorts of great music of what makes

it great, makes it lose its soul. So Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d rather risk the sloppiness and keep the soul.â&#x20AC;? It is doubtful anyone will describe One Bright Boat as sloppy, but it is virtually impossible to talk about the record without using the word soul. In many ways, Atwood approaches his career with the same fluidity he brings to songwriting and recording. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I have a very good feeling about the direction things are going in, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s so hard to know â&#x20AC;&#x201D; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s such a ridiculous enterprise to try and endeavor â&#x20AC;Ś Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d like to think that my incredibly slow and ambling, non-aggressive approach is my way of trying to be OK with myself as much as I can, regardless.â&#x20AC;? So while heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s open to all of the possibilities, he not too attached to a particular outcome. Because, ultimately, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Your dreams are what you have to do, but they may or may not be the answer to your prayers.â&#x20AC;? In â&#x20AC;&#x153;Tell it Like it Is,â&#x20AC;? the last track on One Bright Boat, Atwood sings, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Can you feel your history feeding you lines? Look out, life can be a puppet show â&#x20AC;&#x201D; every day, the same role.â&#x20AC;? But, Atwood says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;You get to break through all of that stuff with some kind of creative process. Then you defy the bounds that weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re told we live within.â&#x20AC;? X Ami Worthen can be contacted at amiwhoa@ gmail.com.

arts X music

SXSw or buSt

Y LOCAL

leSSonS For aSheville FroM auStin’S biggeSt FeStival by alli MarShall Back from South By Southwest (my first time attending the festival and visiting Austin), my head is still spinning from the sheer number of musical acts I encountered. According to SXSW’s FAQ page, at any given time there are more than 80 bands performing — and that’s just the official acts. Add on all the unofficial showcases and parties (which official bands also play) and then the random shows that happen in any space that can count as a venue — an ice-cream shop, a dentist’s office, a real estate agency, a flea market, a street corner. It’s impossible not to catch live music at every turn. Among the thousands of bands performing, Asheville was well represented. Indie-pop duo-turned-trio EAR PWR played the Carpark Records showcase; River Whyless performed at the Papergarden showcase; Airbird (the side project of Ford & Lopatin’s Joel Ford) was on the roster at Moog Music and Switched On’s party; alt-country act Drunken Prayer played the RoadHouse Rags showcase; Wages members Nick Campbell and James DeDakis joined Carrboro’s Fan Modine at the Blurt! Magazine party, Archers of Loaf frontman Eric Bachmann (formerly from Asheville) was on stage at the Merge Records showcase with his Americana group, Crooked Fingers; and Austin-by-way-of-Asheville outfit The Baker Family Band performed throughout the week. (Some non-WNC discoveries: French-Spanish electro-pop singer-songwriter Andrea Balency; singer-songwriter Afie Jurvanen aka Bahamas; and Canadian indie-pop group Said the Whale.) All of that was pretty exciting, but it also established that Asheville music is absolutely on par with national and international bands. The question is, how to let the rest of the music-listening community know what we’ve got going on here in WNC? While in Austin, it occurred to me that an Asheville showcase at SXSW needs to happen — though the sheer number of bands at that festival does raise the question, how beneficial is SXSW to bands that play it? Other than the large acts (e.g., Bruce Springsteen), it’s unlikely that bands are making money by performing SXSW. Many emerging artists go to the festival at their own expense. They book a hotel (or find a couch to crash on), tour on the way to Texas and haul equipment through crowds in order to perform for 45 minutes. Considering that those up-and-coming artists are often overshadowed by bigger names (Fiona Apple! The Shins! 50 Cent!) — is it worth it? If the answer is yes, then Asheville bands and music businesses (Music Allies, Moog and Blurt! were there) should team up to create a platform, a showcase that could share the Asheville sound with the SXSW audience while helping other WNC-based bands make the trip to Texas. And, whether the answer is yes or no, there’s plenty about the Austin festival that could be applied locally. With Moogfest heading full-speed into its third year, Asheville music is prime for national exposure. Moogfest is a boon for the city, and even if only a few local acts are booked for the official roster each year, there’s no reason for other groups and venues not to jump on the proverbial bandwagon with unofficial parties and showcases. Why not? SXSW has shown that the unofficial acts are every bit as important and noteworthy as the officially sanctioned events, and music fans are unlikely to care if a show is official or unofficial as long as it’s good. Plus, non-sanctioned acts create a festive atmosphere even for those who can’t spring for a pricey festival ticket. Free and lowcost side shows are likely to attract bigger crowds and regional performers to town.

Y ORGANIC

BlueSmokeCoffee.com More Significant than politics, weather, or the economy:

THE ABILITY TO HEAL & BE HEALED Healing ToucH level 1

Healing Touch Certificate Program, 18 CE’s for RN’s, LMBT’s

April 28th-29th

Classes will be held in Brevard, NC at Transylvania Regional Hospital Ask about level 2 dates and discounts for registering for both 1 & 2.

Contact Karen Toledo: 828.215.6565 karentoledo@hotmail.com

Judy Lynne Ray, Instructor, MS, CHTI, LMBT

Scandanavia by Southwest: A roots music band from Sweden gets the crowd dancing in the middle of the street. Two more takeaways from SXSW: First, there’s a lot more to music than bands and stages. The Austin festival (in its 26th year) is road-tested and well organized, but it also continues to grow. A gear-trade show filled the convention center for a few days and a fashion component (Style X) included merch and a runway show. Panel discussions, book signings and keynote addresses were also on the schedule, giving an interactive Hatch-like aspect to the festival. Why not add an art-inspired-by-music exhibit, or a workshop for music writers, or a blogger’s gathering? The possibilities are endless, both in Austin and in Asheville. And, finally, despite why a person would attend SXSW or Moogfest (or any music festival) — be it for exposure or business or fun — music creates a community. I was impressed over and over that an event as huge as SXSW could be so organized and friendly (some of my favorite moments were on shuttle rides chatting with musicians and professionals, like producer Clif Norrell, who just engineered Springsteen’s Wrecking Ball), but really, why not? Music bridges gaps; that’s been said before. It builds a community that touches on, yet defies ethnicity, economics, class, education, age, language and gender. It creates family beyond DNA, though surely someday we’ll discover that the desire to connect with and through creative media exists within our human genetic makeup. Some of us play music, some promote it, some support it. It’s a collaborative process in which all roles are of equal value and by participating, we’re made richer, wiser and better. And all it takes to get in on that is the willingness to listen. X Alli Marshall can be reached at amarshall@mountainx.com.

PrePare to occuPy your Garden! Sow True Seed, Seed ProPagaTion KiTS & SuPPlieS, HeaT MaTS, organic Soil, aMendMenTS & FerTilizerS, PoTS, PeaT PoTS & garden acceSSorieS, HydroPonic SySTeMS & SuPPlieS, FluoreScenT, digiTal & BudgeT growligHTS & MucH More! wnc’S oldeST owner oPeraTed growSTore oFFering Friendly cuSToMer Service SPecial orderS, ligHTing rePairS, loyalTy & BulK diScounTS Competitive Prices & Advice You Can Trust!

www.newagegardens.com Located on 2 acres 5 miles from Asheville I-40 (exit 59) Call for details (828) 299-9989

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 53

arts X performance

it’S happening again! by urSula gullow

Prepare yourself for {RE}Happening, a multimedia arts gala taking place Saturday, April 7 on the grounds of the former Black Mountain College campus. For one night only, 60-plus artists will dance, perform, sing, recite, collaborate and exhibit. Based around the idea of the “happenings” that occurred back in the day at the now-legendary BMC, {RE}Happening is a loosely structured program that encourages collaborative art forms and redefines the boundaries between audience and artist. At any point, a procession of dancers might wind itself thru a gaggle of people, a poet might grab a bullhorn or a siren song may echo across the waters of Lake Eden. Those who desire a strict schedule of events will have to adopt a more go-with-the-flow approach to the night, and while it may be impossible to catch every single performance at {RE}Happening, what’s more important is the cumulative creative experience. Since {RE}Happening is a semi-outdoor event, the weather is the ultimate backdrop of the night’s activities, and the early days of April are just as likely to bring warm temperatures and clear skies, as it is snow, chilly winds or rainfall. Last year an epic thunderstorm broke out over the festival, contributing to a foggy and mysterious evening, albeit a muddy one. This year, the event will take place on the evening of the full moon — a detail that several artists have already factored into their pieces. Some performances on the {RE}Happening horizon: Excursus, a multimedia Butoh dance staged in four parts, all centered around a giant kinetic sculpture resembling a rickshaw. Can You Feel It, an interactive rave-music sound installation by sound artist John Brinker. Other performers include: R. Brooke Priddy, Nathanael Roney (also an Xpress designer), Matt Schnable, Bridget Elmer, Claire Elizabeth Barratt, Elisa Faires, Janice Lancaster, Chad Adair, Ted Popes, John Seefeldt and the Easel Rider Mobile Arts Lab. X

Melissa Terrezza’s “Message in a Bottle” installation from last year’s event at the former Black Mountain College campus. Photo by Michael Oppenheim

attend! {RE}Happening dinner ticket $60 BMCM+AC members/ $50 non members $18/$15 after dinner 8:30-11:45 p.m. $7 tickets for Grayline Trolley Shuttle service. Tickets can be purchased at BMCM+AC and Harvest Records. Or visit rehappening.com to purchase tickets online and for more details about shuttle pickup and dinner.

54 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

it’S alSo {pre}happening Two events are happening this weekend that will give a feel for the type of performance you’ll find at the {RE}Happening. On Friday, March 30, Claire Elizabeth Barratt will perform with a group of {RE}Hap artists. On Saturday, March 31, she’ll collaborate with visiting artist David Linton on what Barratt has dubbed a “motion sculpture movement installation.” The Saturday event combines movement, dance and an “ambient yet edgy live soundscape” — and will be going on for six hours (from 3 to 9 p.m.), during which time you can come and go. Both events will be held at the Asheville Area Arts Council’s Artery space in the River District. Both events are by suggested donation: $5 for Friday and $10 for Saturday, during which Barratt will perform for six continuous hours. More at cillavee.com and ashevillearts.com.

smartbets yo Mama’s big Fat booty band Finally — after years and miles logged, after lineup changes and studio time and stage time, after a successful Kickstarter campaign to fund the mastering, artwork and pressing of CDs — local funk outfit Yo Mama’s Big Fat Booty Band is set to launch sophomore studio album, Doin’ It Hard. The in-store release date is March 27; on Saturday, March 31 the heavy-touring group returns to The Orange Peel. The Booty Band shares the bill with Kings of Prussia; RBTS WIN opens. 9 p.m., $10 in advance or $12 at the door. theorangepeel.net.

blue ridge orchestra benefit If you’ve watched a Ken Burns documentary you’ve probably heard the music of pianist Jacqueline Schwab. A performer of classical, folk and contemporary music, Schwab has scored Burns’ films including Civil War, Baseball and The National Parks: America’s Best Idea. She’s currently at work on music for Burns’ upcoming Dust Bowl — but she’s taking a break to play a benefit for the the Blue Ridge Orchestra. Members of BRO join her for the Thursday, March 29 concert at The Altamont Theatre. 7:30 p.m., $15 in advance, $20 at the door, or $40 for table seating. blueridgeorchestra.org.

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 55

smartbets

Mavis Staples You might remember local cover band Mavis — the group frequented Tressa’s and launched the singing career of Paper Tiger’s Molly Kummerle. That band was named in homage to R&B artist Mavis Staples, who got her start in the ‘50s gospel family group, The Staple Singers. She’s not only still around, but still incredible — most recently recording solo album You Are Not Alone (produced by Wilco’s Jeff Tweedy). Staples performs at UNCA’s Lipinsky Auditorium on Saturday, March 31. 8 p.m. Tickets are $5 for UNCA students; $7 for all area students; $20 for UNCA faculty/staff/alumni/NCCCR/WCU; $35 for general public. cesap.unca.edu/events/mavis-staples.

naked author Jam First of all, no one will be reading in the buff at this event. The “naked” part has to do with the new book, Naked Came the Leaf Peeper, a collaborative serial published in celebration of Malaprop’s 30th anniversary. A dozen authors from in and near WNC contributed to the novel, billed as “A Southern Appalachian take on The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.” The writers behind the project all put in an appearance at the UNCA Humanities Lecture Hall on Friday, March 30. 7 p.m. Free. malaprops.com.

56 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

clubland

SAtuRdAy cHicken & WAffleS Sunday Brunch

where to find the clubs • what is playing • listings for venues throughout Western North Carolina Clubland rules •To qualify for a free listing, a venue must be predominately dedicated to the performing arts. Bookstores and cafés with regular open mics and musical events are also allowed. •To limit confusion, events must be submitted by the venue owner or a representative of that venue. •Events must be submitted in written form by e-mail (clubland@mountainx.com), fax, snail mail or hand-delivered to the Clubland Editor Dane Smith at 2 Wall St., Room 209, Asheville, NC 28801. Events submitted to other staff members are not assured of inclusion in Clubland. •Clubs must hold at least TWO events per week to qualify for listing space. Any venue that is inactive in Clubland for one month will be removed. •The Clubland Editor reserves the right to edit or exclude events or venues. •Deadline is by noon on Monday for that Wednesday’s publication. This is a firm deadline.

Disclaimer Standup Lounge (comedy open mic), 9pm

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop guitar), 5:30-7:30pm Killer B’s (favorites by request), 8-11pm

Thu., March 29

Backwater Opera (“chamber grass”)

Barley’s Taproom

Jack of Hearts Pub

5 Walnut Wine Bar

Bluegrass jam, 7pm

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

Dr. Brown’s Team Trivia, 8:30pm

Abigail Stauffer (folk), 8pm

Black Mountain Ale House

Jack of the Wood Pub

Sierra on Stage (songwriting competition) w/ Billy Owens, 7pm Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Open mic

Creatures Cafe

Salsa night (lessons, followed by dance)

One Stop Deli & Bar

Brown Bag Songwriting Competition, 5pm The Blood Gypsies (funk, blues, reggae), 10pm

Dirty South Lounge

Ultra Rockin’ Music Nerd Challenge (trivia), 9pm

Orange Peel

Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

Dueling Pianos (rock ‘n’ roll sing-a-long), 9pm-1am Fred’s Speakeasy

Karaoke, 10pm

French Broad Chocolate Lounge

Jazzville Band

ARCADE

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Athena’s Club

Tea Leaf Green (rock, pop) w/ House of Fools, 9pm Grove Park Inn Great Hall

SBTRKT (electronic) w/ Machinedrum, 9pm TallGary’s Cantina

Open mic/jam, 7pm The Bywater

Matt Williams (multi-instrumentalist), 8pm Arcade Idol, 10pm

Valorie Miller (Americana, folk) Cadillac Rex (vintage rock)

Hurray for the Riff Raff w/ Blind Boy Chocolate & the Milk Sheiks (old-time), 9pm

5 Walnut Wine Bar

Lobster Trap

Olive or Twist

Get Down

Wed., March 28

Old-time jam, 6pm

Game night, 8pm Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Travis Singleton (indie pop), 6pm

ARCADE

Get Down

Trivia, 9pm Archnemesis (pop, rock, jazz) w/ Paper Tiger, 10pm

pinball, foosball, ping-pong & a kickass jukebox kitchen open until late 504 Haywood Rd. West Asheville • 828-255-1109 “It’s bigger than it looks!”

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop guitar), 5:30-7:30pm Killer B’s (favorites by request), 8-11pm

Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Mark Bumgarner (Americana, country)

Handlebar

Broadway’s

Nappy Roots (hip-hop) w/ Natural Habitz, The Ones & more

Ed Schrader’s Music Beat (minimalist, post-punk)

Jack of Hearts Pub

Burgerworx

Old-time jam, 7pm

Open mic, 7pm

Jack of the Wood Pub

Craggie Brewing Company

Floppy Thursdays w/ Molly (eclectic music series), 8pm

Vincenzo’s Bistro

Dirty South Lounge

Marc Keller (acoustic, variety), 7:30pm

Dirty Bingo, 9pm

Westville Pub

Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

Jeff & Justin (acoustic)

Gene Peyroux & the Acoustalectric Pedals of Love (rock, funk, soul)

Ryan Furstenburg & Melissa Hyman (folk), 7pm

Creatures Cafe

Wild Wing Cafe

Good Stuff

Black Mountain Ale House

Peggy’s All Girl Singer Showcase w/ with The ReVamps

Max Melner Orchestra (jazz, funk), 10pm

Marvin & the Cloud Wall (rock, garage, blues) w/ Pierce Edens, 9pm

Asheville Music Hall

Singer-songwriter showcase, 9pm

Bluegrass jam, 6pm

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Back stage: Doc Aquatic (indie rock) w/ Onward Soilders & Andrew John Usher Lobster Trap

Hank Bones (“man of 1,000 songs”) Olive or Twist

Dueling Pianos (rock ‘n’ roll sing-a-long), 9pm-1am Feed and Seed

Heather Masterton Quartet (swing) One Stop Deli & Bar

Ribs & Whiskey feat: Wyndy Trail Travelers (bluegrass), 5pm

A^kZ Bjh^X 5 NIGHTS A WEEK! 9V^an HeZX^Vah FULL BAR! WED THUR 3/29 FRI SAT 3/31 SUN MON TUES

MAX MELNER ORCHESTRA

$1 off all Whiskey • Real New Orleans PoBoys

KEN KISER

Singer/Songwriter • $3.50 Vodka Drinks

TRIVIA NIGHT

Bring Your “A” Team • Prizes • $3.50 Gin & Tonics

JK;I:7OI

Garyoke is back! Hosted by

3/28

$3 Vodkas • $5 Bombs

M;:D;I:7OI

Open Mic 7 pm • $3 Margaritas

J>KH:7OI

$3 Vodka • Live Music

<?;IJ7 <H?:7OI

BLIND LEMON PHILLIPS BAND

LIVE MUSIC River Rats & Guests $3 Margaritas ½ Off Appetizers 4-7 pm

ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT BREAKFAST STARTS @ NOON

I7JKH:7O

Blues/Funk/Soul • $5 Robo Shots

$1 Off Bloody Mary’s & Mimosas

OPEN MIC Sign up at 7pm • $4 Margaritas BUY 1 GET 1 ½ Off APPETIZERS BLUES JAM with Westville Allstars Shrimp ‘n Grits • $3.50 Rum Drinks

OPEN TIL 2AM DAILY | KITCHEN OPEN LATE 777 HAYWOOD ROAD | 225-WPUB WWW.WESTVILLEPUB.COM

Wed

LIVE MUSIC Unit 50 Best Bloody Mary Bar around! 18 Taps of local & regional favorites Come experience our new menu items! Estan muy Buenos!! TUES. - FRI. 4PM • SAT. - SUN. 11AM

4 College Street • 828.232.0809

jWbb]Whoi$Yec

FRI

3/30

Tea Leaf Green w/ House of fools 9:00PM

THe ManTraS 9:00PM

KOvacS & THe POLar Bear: “fareweLL cHriS SHOw” 3/31 w/ Joshua carpenter 9:00PM 4th annuaL freeDOM BaLL: TueS celebrating the release of 4/3 ed chapman 7PM SAT

Wed

DeLTa SPiriT

FRI

ScHOOL Of Seven BeLLS

4/4 4/6

w/ waters 9PM

w/ exitmusic 9PM

Sharon van etten | Bear in Heaven Justin Townes earle | Boxer rebellion archers of Loaf | Sanctum Sully Lambchop w/ crooked fingers

Kitchen Open for Dinner on nights of Shows!

WedneSdayS

“Two DollAr NighT” $2.00 Order Wings (10) $2.00 Bud, Bud Lights, Busch & PBR Cans $2.00 Cover Charge thurSdayS

DANce NighT Beer/Drink Specials MarCh 30 - Live Music

hoss howArD BAND

9:30 – $5.00 MarCh 31 - Live Music

coNTAgious 9:30 – $5.00 SundayS

kArAoke Food & Drink Specials • 8:00pm

Full kiTcheN / Full BAr

WNC’s only Country Night Club SpurS

1501 Patton Ave. • 828-575-2258 spursnightclub@gmail.com

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 57

Pisgah Brewing Company

Phuncle Sam (classic rock), 8pm

Sirius.B (absurdist, gypsy, world) w/ The Bent Strings & Christoph Kresse

Chompin’ at the Bit String Band (old-time, country), 9pm

Purple Onion Cafe

Harrah’s Cherokee

Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Scoot Pitman (singer-songwriter) “Comedy Night” drag show, 10pm Spurs

Highland Brewing Company

Dance night

David Earl & the Plowshares (Americana), 6pm

TallGary’s Cantina

Iron Horse Station

Asheville Music Showcase, 8pm

Dave Desmelik (Americana)

The Altamont Theater

Jack of Hearts Pub

The Nighthawks (roots, blues)

Cindercat (rock, electronic) w/ The Former Champions, 10pm

Jack of the Wood Pub

Craggie Brewing Company

Jacquelyn Schwab (piano) w/ Blue Ridge Orchestra, 7:30pm The Bywater

Pleasure Chest w/ The Krektones (surf rock), 7pm The Market Place

Ben Hovey (downtempo, trumpet, piano, electronics), 6:30-9:30pm Vincenzo’s Bistro

The Croon and Cadence Duo feat: Ginny McAfee, 7:30pm Westville Pub

Ken Kiser (singer-songwriter, Americana), 9:30pm White Horse

Wendy Hayes Quartet (jazz), 7:30pm Wild Wing Cafe

Acoustic music w/ Sloantones

Fri., March 30 ARCADE

Dance party w/ DJ Abu Dissaray, 9pm Athena’s Club

Mark Appleford (blues, folk, rock), 7:30-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am Black Mountain Ale House

Serious Clark (folk, pop), 7pm

Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Acoustic Swing

BoBo Gallery

DJ Arsenal

Boiler Room

Envy of the Wicked w/ Dreamkiller, Pillars of Creation & IronCircle (metal), 9pm Club Metropolis

Morfiend w/ Joey Drip, Disc-Oh!, secret_nc & BoomShock (electronic, dance), 11pm Creatures Cafe

Relentless Flood CD release party w/ A Thin Place Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

Disclaimer Comedy (standup), 8:15-9:15pm Dueling Pianos (rock ‘n’ roll sing-a-long), 9:30pm-1am Emerald Lounge

American Gonzos (rock, funk) w/ Side by Side & Running on E, 10pm Feed and Seed

Dashboard Blue (dance) Fred’s Speakeasy

Live music, 10pm

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

Gavin Conner (singer-songwriter), 6pm

French Broad Chocolate Lounge

Owen Tharp (jazz) Get Down

Gutterhound (rock) w/ Isabelle’s Gift, 9pm

58 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

South Forty (rock, honky-tonk)

Scandals Nightclub

Common Saints, 6:30pm The Moody Blues (classic rock), 9pm DJ Moto, 11pm

Chuck Beattie Band (blues), 4:30pm Kelley Mcrae (singer-songwriter), 7pm Whiskey Bent Valley Boys w/ Chompin at the Bit (old-time), 8pm Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Front stage: Meredith Watson, 6-9pm Back stage: Moses Atwood CD release (folk, Americana) w/ Johnson’s Crossroad, 10pm Lobster Trap

Calico Moon (Americana, folk, country) Olive or Twist

Live music, 8pm

One Stop Deli & Bar

Free Dead Fridays feat: members of Phuncle Sam, 5-8pm Orange Peel

Zed’s Dead (hip-hop, dance) w/ araabMUZIK & XI, 9pm Pack’s Tavern

John Henry’s Jazz Band Pisgah Brewing Company

Blue Dragons (rock, jam) w/ Liz Teague, 7pm Root Bar No. 1

BoBo Gallery

Fader Kat & more Boiler Room

Wide Eyed Mischief w/ Matter of Fact (jam, groove), 9pm Club Metropolis

Terina Plyler & Ian Harrod (folk, Americana), 8pm Creatures Cafe

Tie to Thailand benefit Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

Dueling Pianos (rock ‘n’ roll sing-a-long), 9pm-1am Emerald Lounge

Sons of Bill, 10pm

Feed and Seed

Tom Fisch (singer-songwriter) Fred’s Speakeasy

Karaoke, 10pm

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

Jeff Johansson & Field Heat (rock, indie folk), 6pm French Broad Chocolate Lounge

Asheville Sax Duet (jazz)

Garage at Biltmore

Hallucinatory Upgrade feat: Koji, DJ Shoom, Medisin & Zenssie, 10pm Get Down

Jay Brown (Americana, folk)

The Critters EP release (psych-pop, garage, rock) w/ The Treatment & Zombie Queen, 9pm

Scandals Nightclub

Good Stuff

Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 1am

Southern Appalachian Brewery

J.P. Delanoye (singer-songwriter), 9pm Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

The Jazz Drovers (jazz), 8pm

Kovacs & the Polar Bear (indie folk, rock) w/ Joshua Carpenter, 9pm

Spurs

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Hoss Howard Band, 9:30pm Straightaway Cafe

Ben Scales

Sanctum Sully (bluegrass), 2-5pm Bill Covington (piano classics & standards), 5:30-7:30pm

TallGary’s Cantina

Handlebar

The Altamont Theater

Harrah’s Cherokee

The Bywater

Highland Brewing Company

Tolliver’s Crossing Irish Pub

Iron Horse Station

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Jack of Hearts Pub

Vincenzo’s Bistro

Jack of the Wood Pub

Westville Pub

Jus One More

Wild Wing Cafe

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

The River Rats (blues, rock, punk) w/ Skunk Ruckus Bob Margolin (blues)

Ten Cent Poetry (folk, pop), 9pm Same Ol’ Sound Band (rock, blues, funk) Early jazz spotlight feat: The Source, 7pm The Ruby Slippers (lounge, pop), 10pm

Steve Whiddon (piano covers), 5:30pm The Broken Bottles Trio (country, honky-tonk), 7:30pm Trivia night

Unknown Hinson (psychobilly) w/ Megan Jean & the KFB DJ Dizzy, 6pm-2am

Brushfire Stankgrass (bluegrass), 6pm Calico Moon (Americana, country) Leigh Glass CD release party (Americana, blues, rock) Chris O’Neill (slide guitar), 5pm Vollie McKensie & His Western Wildcats (swing, roots), 9pm Karaoke

SaT., March 31

Back stage: Sunshine & the Bad Things (psychedelic, rock, pop) w/ Science in the Cave & Pawtooth

ARCADE

Lobster Trap

Fairview Union (country)

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

The Mantras (funk, rock, fusion), 9pm

“Bear Exploder” dance party w/ DJ Kipper Schauer, 9pm

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Asheville Music Hall

Live jazz trio

Olive or Twist

The 42nd Street Jazz Band

Donna Germano (hammered dulcimer), 2-4pm Bill Covington (piano classics & standards), 5:30-7:30pm The Business (Motown, funk, soul), 8-11pm

An evening w/ Greensky Bluegrass, 10pm Athena’s Club

Mark Appleford (blues, folk, rock), 7:30-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am

Yo Mamas Big Fat Booty Band (funk, jam) w/ Kings of Prussia (metal, hard rock) & RBTS Win, 9pm

Handlebar

Black Mountain Ale House

Pack’s Tavern

Orange Peel

Cubicle Logic (‘80s hits) Purple Onion Cafe

Joseph Hasty & Centerpiece Jazz

Hotel Indigo

Ben Hovey (downtempo, trumpet, piano, electronics), 7-10pm Jack of the Wood Pub

Root Bar No. 1

Wilhelm McKay (folk, roots) Scandals Nightclub

Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am

Southern Appalachian Brewery

The Secret B-Sides (R&B, rock, soul), 8pm Spurs

Contagious, 9:30pm Straightaway Cafe

Greg Terkelson

TallGary’s Cantina

Unit 50 (rock)

The Bywater

Blood Root Orkaestarr, (gypsy folk), 9pm The Magnetic Field

Attaloss (modern rock)

Dukes of Brooklyn (garage, blues, rock) Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Back stage: Grant Hart (of Husker Du), 4pm Back stage: Babies (punk, garage) w/ Fine Peduncle, Free Lunch & Housefire/Sunduel, 9pm One Stop Deli & Bar

Marc Keller (acoustic, variety), 7:30pm Westville Pub

Family karaoke night

Jack of the Wood Pub

General Oglethorpe & the Panhandlers (indie folk, rock) w/ Lyric (pop, soul, funk, rock), 10pm The Bywater

Bluegrass jam, 8pm

Rankin Vault Cocktail Lounge

Westville Pub

Scandals Nightclub

Wild Wing Cafe

Psychobilly Sock Hop Sundays Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am Spurs

Karaoke, 8pm The Altamont Theater Vincenzo’s Bistro

Steve Whiddon (piano covers), 5:30pm White Horse

White Horse

Mon., april 2

Sun., april 1

Jack of Hearts Pub

Vincenzo’s Bistro

Blind Lemon Phillips Band (blues, funk, soul), 10pm Nu-Blue (bluegrass), 8pm

Contra dance, 8pm

Bluegrass Brunch & open jam w/ The Pond Brothers, 11am

Brian “Breeze” Cayolle (jazz), noon

Vincenzo’s Bistro

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Drum circle, 2pm

5 Walnut Wine Bar

CaroMia Tiller (singer-songwriter), 8-10pm

Marc Keller (acoustic, variety), 7:30pm Open mic, 7pm

Karaoke, 10pm

Tue., april 3 5 Walnut Wine Bar

The John Henry’s (jazz, swing), 8-10pm Altamont Brewing Company

Open mic w/ Zachary T, 8:30pm

Black Mountain Ale House

Trivia night, 7pm

Eleven on Grove

Swing lessons, 6:30 & 7:30pm Tango lessons, 7pm Dance w/ One Leg Up, 8:30pm Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

4th annual Freedom Ball feat: David LaMotte, Chris Rosser & River Gueerguerian, 7pm

ARCADE

DJs Dr. Filth & Wayd Runk, 10pm

Movie Mondays (cult classics), 10pm

Dirty South Lounge

The Short Bus (film & DJ), 9pm

Tears in My Beers (DJ set), 9pm

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop guitar), 5:30-7:30pm Killer B’s (favorites by request), 8-11pm

Get Down

Karaoke

Red Warlock (metal) w/ Spew, 9pm

Heavenly Spirits Wine Bar

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Good Stuff

Two Guitars (classical), 10am-noon

Ryan Furstenburg & Melissa Hyman (folk), 6pm

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Monet Davis & Timothy Wilkinson (piano), 6-8pm Hotel Indigo

Th u r . m arch 29

DoC AquAtiC w/ onwArD, solDiers & AnDrew j usher

fri. march 30

Moses AtwooD reCorD releAse

w/ johnson’s CrossroAD

saT. m arc h 31

sunshine & the bAD things w/ sCienCe in the CAve & pAwtooth

s u n. a pril 1

bAbies tour

kiCk-off pArty w/ fine peDunCle, housefire/sunDuel, free lunCh grAnt hArt (hÜsker DÜ!) MAtinee show 4pM

o n t h e f r o n t s tA g e

Tuesday april 3

Jake hollifield

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 59

thursday, march 29

Jacqueline Schwab w/ blue ridge Orchestra $15 | 7:30Pm

Friday, march 30

Bob Margolin $12 | 8Pm

saturday, april 7 russ Wilson nouveau Passe Orchesta Present:

“Futuristic Rhythm!” $10 | 8Pm

Ben Hovey (downtempo, trumpet, piano, electronics), 7-10pm

Barley’s Taproom

TallGary’s Cantina

Jack of the Wood Pub

Black Mountain Ale House

The Bywater

John Craigie, Leigh Jones & Ken Kiser (singersongwriters), 7pm Skunk Ruckus w/ The Sawyer Family (“swampy” rock), 9pm

Open mic w/ Dave Bryan, 8pm

Jus One More

Salsa night (lessons, followed by dance)

Karaoke

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Front stage: Jake Hollifield (blues, ragtime)

828-348-5327 www.thealtamont.com

Marc Keller (acoustic, variety), 7:30pm

Creatures Cafe

Westville Pub

Max Melner Orchestra (jazz, funk), 10pm

Dirty South Lounge

Ultra Rockin’ Music Nerd Challenge (trivia), 9pm

Thu., april 5

Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

ARCADE

One Stop Deli & Bar

Get Down

Calico Moon (Americana, country), 7pm

Music trivia, 8pm Funk jam, 10pm

The Altamont Theater

Original music series, 8pm The Bywater

Open mic w/ Taylor Martin, 8:30pm Tolliver’s Crossing Irish Pub

Trivia, 8pm

Vincenzo’s Bistro

Steve Whiddon (piano covers), 5:30pm

White Horse

18 church street | asheville, nc

Vincenzo’s Bistro

Open mic

Trivia, 9pm

doug norwine

Original music series hOsted by mike hOlstein & Justin Watt

Game night, 8pm

Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Jay Brown (Americana, folk), 7pm

Sunday Jazz FREE Every Tuesday Night!

Open mic/jam, 7pm

Dueling Pianos (rock ‘n’ roll sing-a-long), 9pm-1am

Lobster Trap

Westville Pub

$10 | 1pm

Dr. Brown’s Team Trivia, 8:30pm

Blues jam, 10pm

Irish sessions, 6:30pm Open mic, 8:45pm Wild Wing Cafe

Video trivia, 8pm

Wed., april 4

This Way to the Egress (gypsy punk, cabaret) w/ Mr. Joe Black & Valerie, 9pm Good Stuff

T.C. Costello (multi-instrumentalist, punk), 6pm Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Delta Spirit (roots, rock) w/ Waters, 9pm

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop guitar), 5:30-7:30pm Killer B’s (favorites by request), 8-11pm Jack of Hearts Pub

Old-time jam, 6pm

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Disclaimer Standup Lounge (comedy open mic), 9pm

Floppy Thursdays w/ Molly (eclectic music series), 8pm Singer-songwriter showcase, 9pm Dirty South Lounge

Dirty Bingo, 9pm

Eleven on Grove

Front stage: Dave Desmelik (Americana) Back stage: Trevor Dunn’s Endangered Blood w/ Ahleuchatistas (prog, experimental, jazz), 9pm Lobster Trap

Valorie Miller (Americana, folk)

One Stop Deli & Bar

Craggie Brewing Company

Dueling Pianos (rock ‘n’ roll sing-a-long), 9pm-1am

Jack of the Wood Pub

Athena’s Club

Open mic, 7pm

Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

Bluegrass jam, 7pm

Olive or Twist

Burgerworx

Creatures Cafe

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

ARCADE

Arcade Idol, 10pm

Black Mountain Ale House

“Morphia The Dream Queen” (drawing event), 7-10pm Emerald Lounge

Dead Night w/ Phuncle Sam French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

T.C. Costello (folk, punk), 6pm

Cadillac Rex (vintage rock)

Garage at Biltmore

Brown Bag Songwriting Competition, 5pm Earphunk (funk) w/ Lucid, 10pm

Burnstitch (metal) w/ Lydia Can’t Breathe, Impale the Destroyer & Issachar Good Stuff

7.#´S 0REMIERE !DULT ,OUNGE 3PORTS 2OOM Ladies & Couples Welcome Sports Lounge feat. NBA & UFC on big screen Now featuring area’s only “Spinning Pole” Great Drink Specials Every Night see for yourself at

TheTreasureClub.com

New Hours:

Mon - Sat 6:30pm - 2am

5 2 0 S wa nna no a R i v e r R d , As hev i l l e, NC 28805 • ( 828) 298-1 400 60 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

clubdirectory 5 Walnut Wine Bar 253-2593 Altamont Brewing Company 575-2400 The Altamont Theatre 348-5327 ARCADE 258-1400 Asheville Civic Center & Thomas Wolfe Auditorium 259-5544 Asheville Music Hall 255-7777 Athena’s Club 252-2456 Avery Creek Pizza & Ribs 687-2400 Barley’s Tap Room 255-0504 Black Mountain Ale House 669-9090 Blend Hookah Lounge 505-0067 Blue Mountain Pizza 658-8777 Blue Note Grille 697-6828 Boiler Room 505-1612 BoBo Gallery 254-3426 Broadway’s 285-0400 Burgerworx 253-2333 The Bywater 232-6967 Club Hairspray 258-2027 The Chop House 253-1852 Craggie Brewing Company 254-0360

Creature’s Cafe 254-3636 Desoto Lounge 986-4828 Diana Wortham Theater 257-4530 Dirty South Lounge 251-1777 Dobra Tea Room 575-2424 Eleven on Grove 505-1612 Emerald Lounge 232- 4372 Firestorm Cafe 255-8115 Fred’s Speakeasy 281-0920 French Broad Brewery Tasting Room 277-0222 French Broad Chocolate Lounge 252-4181 The Garage 505-2663 Get Down 505-8388 Good Stuff 649-9711 Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern 232-5800 Grove House Eleven on Grove 505-1612 The Grove Park Inn (Elaine’s Piano Bar/ Great Hall) 252-2711 The Handlebar (864) 233-6173 Harrah’s Cherokee 497-7777

Highland Brewing Company 299-3370 Holland’s Grille 298-8780 The Hop 254-2224 The Hop West 252-5155 Iron Horse Station 622-0022 Jack of Hearts Pub 645-2700 Jack of the Wood 252-5445 Jus One More 253-8770 Lexington Avenue Brewery 252-0212 The Lobster Trap 350-0505 Luella’s Bar-B-Que 505-RIBS Mack Kell’s Pub & Grill 253-8805 The Magnetic Field 257-4003 Mike’s Side Pocket 281-3096 One Stop Bar Deli & Bar 255-7777 The Orange Peel 225-5851 Pack’s Tavern 225-6944 Pisgah Brewing Co. 669-0190 Pulp 225-5851 Purple Onion Cafe 749-1179 Rankin Vault 254-4993

Gene Peyroux & the Acoustalectric Pedals of Love (rock, funk, soul)

Dance night

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Asheville Music Showcase, 8pm

Bob Zullo (jazz, pop guitar), 5:30-7:30pm Killer B’s (favorites by request), 8-11pm Jack of Hearts Pub

Old-time jam, 7pm

Jack of the Wood Pub

Bluegrass jam, 6pm

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Back stage: Underhill Rose (Americana, country) w/ Lefty Williams, 9pm Lobster Trap

Hank Bones (“man of 1,000 songs”) Olive or Twist

Heather Masterton Quartet (swing) One Stop Deli & Bar

Joe Krown Trio (funk, jazz), 10pm Orange Peel

of Montreal (indie rock, pop) w/ Loney Dear & Kishi Bashi, 9pm Pisgah Brewing Company

American Babies (Americana, alt-country), 8pm Purple Onion Cafe

Jimmy Landry (folk rock) Root Bar No. 1

Dan Tedesco (folk, Americana) Spurs

clubland@mountainx.com

TallGary’s Cantina Vincenzo’s Bistro

The Croon and Cadence Duo feat: Ginny McAfee, 7:30pm Westville Pub

Red Stag Grill at the Grand Bohemian Hotel 505-2949 Rendezvous 926-0201 Root Bar No.1 299-7597 Scandals Nightclub 252-2838 Scully’s 251-8880 Shovelhead Saloon 669-9541 Smokey’s After Dark 253-2155 Southern Appalacian Brewery 684-1235 Spurs 575-2258 Static Age Records 254-3232 Straightaway Cafe 669-8856 TallGary’s Cantina 232-0809 Rocky’s Hot Chicken Shack 575-2260 Thirsty Monk South 505-4564 Tolliver’s Crossing Irish Pub 505-2129 Tressa’s Downtown Jazz & Blues 254-7072 Vincenzo’s Bistro 254-4698 Westville Pub 225-9782 White Horse 669-0816 Wild Wing Cafe 253-3066

Bitch Please (electronic, house, dubstep) w/ Scoundrel, DJ Jer-Bear & Betty Toker Fred’s Speakeasy

Live music, 10pm

Get Down

Dance party w/ DJ Abu Dissaray, 9pm Athena’s Club

Mark Appleford (blues, folk, rock), 7:30-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am Black Mountain Ale House

The Get Right Duo, 7:30pm Boiler Room

IronCircle w/ Amnesis, Dead Light Pulse & Opus Grey (metal), 9pm

Dave Desmelik (Americana), 6pm

Welkin Dusk (punk, metal) w/ Hitokiri & Shadow of the Destroyer Good Stuff

Butter Holler (old-time), 8pm

$$ Ca sh 4

Ju n k C a r s

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

School of Seven Bells (indie rock, pop, electronic) w/ Exitmusic, 9pm Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Donna Germano (hammered dulcimer), 2-4pm Bill Covington (piano classics & standards), 5:30-7:30pm The Business (Motown, funk, soul), 8-11pm Highland Brewing Company

Creatures Cafe

Sea Gisondo & the Change

Leigh Glass & the Hazards CD release party (Americana, blues, rock), 6pm

Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

Jack of Hearts Pub

Disclaimer Comedy (standup), 8:15-9:15pm Dueling Pianos (rock ‘n’ roll sing-a-long), 9:30pm-1am

175 WEAVERVILLE HWY. ASHEVILLE, NC 28804 828-645-4230 • DIXIELANDMUSIC.BIZ

Emerald Lounge

Fri., April 6

ARCADE

M^o FWo Ceh[

EXPERIENCE OUR DOWN HOME FRIENDLY SERVICE

DJ Jam (R&B), 9pm

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

Blind Boy Chocolate & the Milk Sheiks (old-time, jug band) w/ Deep Chatham, 9pm

AT OR BELOW CATALOG PRICING

Eleven on Grove

John Cragie & Leigh Jones (Americana), 9:30pm

Altamont Brewing Company

7jj[dj_ed Cki_Y_Wdi

NEW • USED • CoNSIgNMENtS • LESSoNS REpAIRS • RENtALS

Jay Brown (Americana, blues) w/ Sarah Carlisle, 8pm Jack of the Wood Pub

GASHOG JUNK • TIRED • WRECKED •

Get rid of a non-running vehicle

Sell your old car • Clean up your property

Pay your Rent! • Get money toward your next auto purchase

Free Pickup 7 Days a Week

Call John • 828-273-1961

www.ashevilleJunkremoval.Com

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 61

Rentals:

25% OFF all Gay Rental DVDs

DVDs:

FULL FEATURES on sale for $7.95 $1 / 1 DAY RENTALS ON SUNDAYS

40% OFF PARTY DRESSES

DOWNTOWN ON THE PARK Fine Foods â&#x20AC;˘ 30 Brews On Tap â&#x20AC;˘ Patio â&#x20AC;˘ 13 TVâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Sports Room â&#x20AC;˘ 110â&#x20AC;? Projector â&#x20AC;˘ Event Space Now Catering Open 7 Days 11am - Late

March Madness JOIN US FOR

20% OFF of Any One Item

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Managerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Choiceâ&#x20AC;? Drink Specials throughout the tournament

LIVE MUSIC... NEVER A COVER

MUST PRESENT COUPON. LIMIT ONE PER CUSTOMER. EXP. 4/30/12

FRI. 3/30 John Henryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Jazz Band

Black Mountain Ale House

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

DJ night, 8pm

Jackomo (cajun, zydeco)

Back stage: Every Motherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dream (folk rock, pop) w/ The Pond Brothers, 10pm Olive or Twist

Live music, 8pm One Stop Deli & Bar

Free Dead Fridays feat: members of Phuncle Sam, 5-8pm Strange Arrangement (jam, funk, rock) w/ The Fritz, 10pm Orange Peel

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Godspellâ&#x20AC;? (musical theater), 7:30pm Packâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Tavern

Boiler Room

Through the Fallen w/ Chemical Release & Awaken (metal), 9pm Craggie Brewing Company

Lyric (pop, soul, funk, rock), 8pm Creatures Cafe

The Change w/ Pocket Vinyl & Aaron LaFalce Elaineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dueling Piano Bar

Dueling Pianos (rock â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; roll sing-a-long), 9pm-1am Emerald Lounge

Jack of Hearts Pub Jack of the Wood Pub

Hank West w/ Ribtips & Molly Gene Jus One More

Karaoke Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Back stage: The DrawlStrings (alt-country, rock, Americana) w/ Grammer School Lobster Trap

Live jazz trio Olive or Twist

The 42nd Street Jazz Band

Letters to Abigail (Americana)

Darien (singer-songwriter) w/ Tumbledown House & Mystery Cult, 10pm

Pisgah Brewing Company

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

Consider the Source (jam, psychedelic) w/ Asian Teacher Factory, 10pm

Ten Cent Poetry (folk, pop), 6pm

Orange Peel

Get Down

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Godspellâ&#x20AC;? (musical theater), 1 & 7pm

Drunken Prayer (Americana, alt-country) w/ The Moodees, 9pm

Packâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Tavern

Zansa (modern electric, West African) w/ The Brand New Life (world beat, funk), 8pm Scandals Nightclub

Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 1am Vincenzoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bistro

Steve Whiddon (piano covers), 5:30pm

Good Stuff

Peace Jones (rock, jam), 8pm Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

One Stop Deli & Bar

DJ Aaron Michaels (dance, pop) Purple Onion Cafe

Overmountain Men (bluegrass, folk) Scandals Nightclub

Trivia night

Sanctum Sully (bluegrass) CD release show w/ Yarn, 9pm

SAT. 3/31

White Horse

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Current Invention (covers, dance), 8pm

Vincenzoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bistro

Cubicle Logic

SAt., April 7

Brandon Crocker Duo, 2-5pm Bill Covington (piano classics & standards), 5:30-7:30pm The Broadcast (soul, rock), 8-11pm

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Bear Exploderâ&#x20AC;? dance party w/ DJ Kipper Schauer, 9pm

Harrahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cherokee

White Horse

Athenaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Club

Highland Brewing Company

April 3

Chef Thomas Montgomery of 12 Bones Smokehouse vs.Chef Thomas Ward of Fig Bistro Call 828-225-6944 for reservations

Where Adult Dreams Come True â&#x20AC;˘ â&#x20AC;˘ OPEN 7 DAYS â&#x20AC;˘ â&#x20AC;˘

SUN-THUR 8 AM - MIDNIGHT FRI SAT 8 AM - 3 AM

(828) 684-8250

."/,- 3

Fly fishing film tour, 5pm

Westville Pub

Host of WNC Chefs Challenge

(S. Asheville/Arden)

Mark Appleford (blues, folk, rock), 7:30-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am

(jazz)

(80â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Hits)

2334 Hendersonville Rd.

Twilite Broadcaster (old-time, vintage country) w/ The Driftwood Singers & Justin Robinson and the Mary Annettes

20 S. SPRUCE ST. â&#x20AC;˘ 225.6944 PACKSTAVERN.COM

,# 3

- ./, 3

' , "

Pint night

DAviD EArl & thE PlowshArEs

brushfirE stAnkgrAss

(AmEricAnA / rock)

62 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 â&#x20AC;˘ mountainx.com

(jAmgrAss)

ARCADE

Drags to Riches (variety), 7:30pm

Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am Marc Keller (acoustic, variety), 7:30pm Westville Pub

Swayback Sisters (Appalachian folk), 10pm Land of the Sky Symphonic Band (jazz, chamber), 8pm

crankyhanke

theaterlistings Friday, MarCh 30 Thursday, aPriL 5 Due to possible last-minute scheduling changes, moviegoers may want to confirm showtimes with theaters.

movie reviews & listings by ken hanke

JJJJJ max rating

additional reviews by justin souther contact xpressmovies@aol.com

Please call the info line for updated showtimes.

pickoftheweek

Big miracle (pg) 1:00, 4:00 war horse (pg-13) 7:00 ghost Rider: spirit of vengeance (pg-13) 10:00

RampaRt

JJJJJ

Director: oren MoverMan (The Messenger) Players: WooDy Harrelson, robin WrigHt, sigourney Weaver, ben Foster, neD beatty, ice cube, steve busceMi, anne HecHe, cyntHia nixon police cRime DRama

asheville pizza & BRewing co. (254-1281)

RateD R

The Story: Character study of the descent of a corrupt police officer into the abyss of his own excesses. The Lowdown: A brilliantly made but extremely uncomfortable film centered on one police officer, which is anchored to a terrifically compelling performance by Woody Harrelson. It loses steam toward the end, but is overall powerful. Owen Moverman’s Rampart is a powerful but flawed film that is both hard to like and impossible to ignore. A nightmarish, hallucinatory film, bathed in raw neon colors and with style to spare, and with a blistering central performance by Woody Harrleson, it’s the kind of movie that all but defies you to like it — almost as if it is indifferent to its reception. And despite its undeniable quality, I fear it’s a film that isn’t destined to be terribly popular. That’s a shame, too, because even though it goes on too long for its own good and simply stops more than it actually ends, it’s built on such bold and accomplished filmmaking that it really should be seen. The film — cowritten by Moverman and renowned crime novelist James Leonard (who is probably responsible for the pitch-perfect dialogue) — is in essence a portrait of police officer David Brown (Harrelson) as his life spirals out of control. Brown is anything but a good police officer or a good man. He’s a bullying racist, a sociopathic vigilante with a uniform. He’s a remnant of the LAPD at its worst, a hangover from the scandals that had plagued it for years. The film is set in 1999, right after the Rampart scandals of widespread police corruption. Brown — who is of the opinion that everything a cop is taught at the police academy is wrong — is the last thing the department needs. Nothing we see him do in the course of a day’s work could be construed as admirable — from “buzzing” groups of Latinos just to see them run to abusing his fellow Vietnam veteran, the wheelchair-bound “General” (Ben Foster). Brown’s personal life is no better. He has two ex-wives (Anne Heche and Cynthia Nixon), who also happen to be sisters, and a daughter from each. He seems to delight in getting them all together around the dinner table to lord over them — or attempt to — his patriarchal authority. One can only conclude that this is his twisted

caRmike cinema 10 (298-4452)

21 Jump street (R) 2:10, 4:50, 7:25, 10:00 Jeff who lives at home (R) 1:05, 3:20, 5:35, 7:50, 10:05 John carter 3D (pg-13) 12:55, 3:50, 6:40, 9:40 John carter 2D (pg-13) 2:30, 5:25, 8:55 mirror mirror (pg) 1:40, 4:05, 6:30, 8:50 october Baby (pg-13) 1:30, 4:10, 6:45, 9:30 project X (R) 1:00, 3:10, 5:20, 7:55, 10:10 Rampart (R) 2:00, 4:40, 7:15, 9:50 silent house (R) 4:15, 9:45 star wars: episode one — the phantom menace 3D (pg) 1:15, 6:25 a thousand words (pg-13) 2:20, 4:35, 6:50, 9:05 n

Woody Harrelson gives an explosive performance as a corrupt, sociopathic cop in Oren Moverman’s brilliantly stylish and disturbing Rampart. notion of family life. Yet there seems to be no emotion in it — apart from playing the authority figure. There’s never any real sense that he particularly cares for any of these women, but he’s determined to keep them all together. Things take an extremely bad turn for Brown when a car broadsides his patrol cruiser. He will later claim that he got out of his car and attempted to help the other man. It looks more like he gets out of his cruiser in a rage, but what matters is that the man runs — and when Brown catches up with him, he savagely beats the fellow. And every bit of it is captured on video by a passerby. As a result, his half-hearted protestations don’t play very well — nor, for that matter, does his swaggering attitude that he can’t be touched. He is from an era where anything a policeman might do was excused, or possibly even be praised. But that era is gone and he can’t seem to realize it. At the same time, he’s fully prepared to play every card in the deck, especially those involving Vietnam and PTSD. It’s so obvious that he doesn’t believe his own argument that internal-affairs investigator Joan Confrey (Sigourney Weaver) asks him at one point, “Can we please not go to Vietnam today?” This, however, is only the beginning of where Brown’s arrogance and complete faith in a dismantled old-boy network will take him on his descent. Sequence after sequence drags him further down into the mire of his own making in a progression that is almost phantasmagoric. The lurid, ghastly, obviously enhanced colors make it seem ever more an unreal, separate world. The sequence where Brown is being questioned by Bill Blago (Steve Buscemi) is done in a series of swirling camera movements, and it’s one of the

most strikingly constructed scenes I’ve seen in a while. All of this is held together by Harrelson’s compelling performance. As I noted at the outset, the film is far from perfect, especially toward the end — though even there there are moments of brilliance, like Brown’s final meeting with an incorruptible police official (Ice Cube) — and the fact that its ending just isn’t satisfactory. But overall, this is such a powerful, well-made film that I’m inclined to cut it some slack in this regard. Rated R for pervasive language, sexual content and some violence. reviewed by Ken Hanke Starts Friday at Carolina Asheville Cinema 14

the hungeR games JJJJ

caRolina asheville cinema 14 (274-9500)

21 Jump street (R) 11:05, 1:45, 4:15, 7:15, 9:55 act of valor (R) 3:15, 10:00 the artist (pg-13) 12:05, 2:25, 4:45, 7:05, 9:40 (sofa cinema) Dr. seuss’ the lorax 3D (pg) 11:45, 2:15, 4:20 Dr. seuss’ the lorax 2D (pg) 12:15, 2:45, 4:55, 7:20, 9:30 (sofa cinema) Friends with kids (R) 11:15, 2:05, 4:40, 7:35, 10:10 (sofa cinema) the hunger games (pg-13) 11:20, 11:50, 3:00, 3:30, 6:45, 7:00. 7:30, 9:45. 10:00. 10:30 Jeff who lives at home (R) 12:10, 2:30, 4:40, 7:55. 9:50 John carter (pg-13) 11:25, 7:10 mirror mirror (pg) 12:00, 2:35, 5:00, 7:50, 10:25 Rampart (R) 11:10, 1:55, 4:35, 7:25, 10:10 safe house (R) 11:40, 2:20, 4:50, 7:45, 10:20 (sofa cinema) wrath of the titans 3D (pg-13) 11:45, 2:10, 4:25, 7:40, 10:05 wrath of the titans 2D (pg-13) 12:15, 2:40, 5:05, 8:00. 10:20

Director: gary ross (seabiscuiT) Players: JenniFer laWrence, JosH HutcHerson, liaM HeMsWortH, WooDy Harrelson, elizabetH banks, Wes bentley

cineBaRRe (665-7776)

co-eD cinema BRevaRD (883-2200)

Dystopian sci-Fi action

epic oF henDeRsonville (693-1146)

Fine aRts theatRe (232-1536)

RateD pg-13

The Story: In an oppressive future society, lottery-selected 12-to-18 year olds are pitted against each other in a fight to the death known as the Hunger Games. The Lowdown: Reasonably exciting and entertaining film that will likely mean more to fans of the books than to the casual moviegoer. If I had read the books, I would perhaps have had a greater emotional involvement with Gary Ross’ film adaptation of The Hunger Games — though reading the book shouldn’t be a requirement to get the good out of the movie. And while I recognize the positive impact of the

the hunger games (pg-13) 1:00, 4:00, 7:00

salmon Fishing in the yemen (pg-13) 1:00, 4:00, 7:00, late show Fri-sat 9:15 thin ice (R) 1:20, 4:20, 7:20, late show Fri-sat 9:20 n

FlatRock cinema (697-2463)

Red tails (pg-13) 4:00, 7:00 (no 7 p.m. show Mon) n

Regal BiltmoRe gRanDe staDium 15 (684-1298)

uniteD aRtists BeaucatcheR (298-1234)

For some theaters movie listings were not available at press time. Please contact the theater or check mountainx.com for updated information.

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 63

startingfriday MIRROR MIRROR

Well, here is the year’s first revisionist take on the Snow White story (Snow White and the Huntsman doesn’t hit theaters till June), and it appears to be the more campy take on the tale. What holds the most promise about the film is the visual panache of director Tarsem Singh, whose The Fall (2006) has become a well-deserved cult classic. OK, so his last film Immortals wasn’t in that league, and this one looks like it might just be too jokey for its own good. A solid cast — Julia Roberts, Armie Hammer, Sean Bean, Nathan Lane — should help, and while Lily Collins (as Snow White) has yet to make much of an impression in her previous films, she doesn’t come with the baggage that Kristen Stewart will inevitably bring to the later attempt. There are no reviews of any note as yet. (PG)

nowplaying 21 JuMP STREET JJJJ

Jonah hill, Channing TaTum, Brie larson, Dave FranCo, roB riggle, Deray Davis, iCe CuBe Action Comedy Undercover cops pose improbably as high school students to break up a drug ring. Pretty funny and surprisingly agreeable spoof of the old TV show, but also raucous and raunchy. Rated R

THE ARTIST JJJJJ

OCTObER bAbY JJJ

raChel henDriX, Jason Burkey, John sChneiDer, Jasmine guy, JenniFer PriCe, shari wieDmann Faith-based Drama An adopted girl goes searching for her birth mother. Better looking (at least some of the time) than most faith-based movies and with a standout small turn from Jasmine Guy, but strictly of interest to a very specific demographic. Rated PG-13

RAMPART JJJJJ

See review in “Cranky Hanke.”

Jean DuJarDin, BéréniCe BeJo, John gooDman, James Crowmwell, PeneloPe ann miller Comedy Drama A silent movie star finds himself left behind when talkies come on the scene, while the girl whose career he helped launch becomes a big star. The very fact that a silent movie—done in period style—is coming out today is cause for some celebration, and while The Artist may not be quite as remarkable as the claims that precede it, it has charm to spare and is a must-see. Rated PG-13

WRATH OF THE TITANS

CHICO & RITA JJJJJ

SAFE HOuSEJ

THE dESCENdANTS JJJJJ

SALMON FISHING IN THE YEMEN JJJJ

RAMPART

See review in “Cranky Hanke.”

SALMON FISHING IN THE YEMEN

Despite the fact that Clash of the Titans was not especially well received — especially by admirers of the 1981 movie — it made a nice profit when you factor in the worldwide receipts, so a sequel was inevitable. Just why they gave the project over to the director of the misbegotten Battle Los Angeles is perplexing, however. In any case, this one’s all about Perseus (Sam Worthington) going to hell to rescue Zeus (Liam Neeson). So far, it has no reviews of any kind — not even of the dubious IMDb variety. Make of that what you will. (PG-13)

specialscreenings THE CAT ANd THE CANARY JJJJJ OLd dARk HOuSE HORROR COMEdY RATEd NR In Brief: The classic tale of relatives gathering at an old mansion for a late-night reading of the will — one of those documents with an alternate heir that is little short of an invitation to drive the real heir (or heiress in this case) insane in order to usurp the inheritance. Still shuddery, with tons of atmosphere and horrific set-pieces — and a liberal dose of comedy. The Thursday Horror Picture Show will screen The Cat and the Canary on Thursday, March 29, at 8 p.m. in the Cinema Lounge of The Carolina Asheville, and will be hosted by Xpress movie critics Ken Hanke and Justin Souther.

CATCH ME IF YOu CAN JJJJ FACT-bASEd COMEdY dRAMA RATEd PG-13 In Brief: Steven Spielberg’s return to the type of film for which he is most prized by the public — following two less popular, more adventurous films — is an agreeable, if somewhat overlong and not particularly memorable “true” story about a high schooler who managed to pass himself off as an airline pilot, a doctor and a lawyer. A good cast helps. The Hendersonville Film Society will show Catch Me If You Can at 2 p.m. on Sunday, April 1, in the Smoky Mountain Theater at Lake Pointe Landing Retirement Community (behind Epic Cinemas), 333 Thompson St., Hendersonville.

HOW TO GET AHEAd IN AdvERTISING JJJJJ bLACk COMEdY FANTASY RATEd R In Brief: Bruce Robinson’s blistering — and hysterically funny — attack on both advertising and consumer culpability, How to Get Ahead in Advertising, is a fantasticated satire about an advertising whiz who suffers a crise de conscience that is followed by a bizarre physical change in the form of a talking boil that ultimately becomes a second head which takes over — creating a true monster of the advertising kind. Hard to describe without it sounding ridiculous, but the film is actually anything but, and the line between reality and fantasy is much more defined than is often assumed. The Asheville Film Society will screen How to Get Ahead in Advertising on Tuesday, April 3, at 8 p.m. in the Cinema Lounge of The Carolina Asheville, and will be hosted by Xpress movie critics Ken Hanke and Justin Souther. Hanke is the artistic director of the A.F.S.

64 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

(voiCes) lemara meneses, eman Xor oña, mario guerra, lenny manDel Animated Jazz Drama Time-spanning love story of two Cuban jazz performers from 1948 onward. Colorful, jazz-filled and very adult animated film that captures the 1940s and ‘50s jazz scene, and deserved its Oscar nomination. Rated NR

george Clooney, shailene wooDley, amara miller, niCk krause, PaTriCia hasTie Comedy Drama A Hawaiian real-estate lawyer faces his wife’s impending death, two daughters he doesn’t understand and a large circle of dissolute relatives bent on selling the family land. A relatably human comedy-drama that is both surprisingly funny and moving, cemented by a terrific performance from George Clooney. Rated R

dR. SEuSS’ THE LORAx JJJ

(voiCes oF) Danny DeviTo, eD helms, ZaC eFron, Taylor swiFT, BeTTy whiTe, roB riggle Animated Fantasy with Songs A young boy ventures into the barren wilderness to find out what happened to the trees. A reasonably harmless, annoyingly cheerful version of the Dr. Seuss story that is, by necessity, padded to reach feature length— which it feels a good bit of the time. Rated PG

FRIENdS WITH kIdS JJJJ

aDam sCoTT, JenniFer wesTFelDT, John hamm, krisTen wiig, maya ruDolPh, Chris o’DowD, megan FoX, eDwarD Burns Romantic Comedy Best friends Julie and Jason decide to go ahead and have a baby while they’re both individually looking for his or her “perfect” romantic partner. A pretty refreshing romantic comedy that thrives on good writing and characterizations, even while heading to the ending you knew it would have when you bought the ticket. Rated R

THE HuNGER GAMES JJJJ

JenniFer lawrenCe, Josh huTCherson, liam hemsworTh, wooDy harrelson, eliZaBeTh Banks, wes BenTley Dystopian Sci-Fi Action In an oppressive future society, lottery-selected 12-to-18 year olds are pitted against each other in a fight to the death known as the Hunger Games. Reasonably exciting and entertaining film that will likely mean more to fans of the books than to the casual moviegoer. Rated PG-13

JOHN CARTER JJJJ

Taylor kiTsCh, lynn Collins, samanTha morTon, willem DaFoe, Thomas haDen ChurCh, mark sTrong, Ciarán hinDs Sci-Fi Adventure A Civil War veteran is transported to Mars where he becomes embroiled in the warring factions of the planet. Surprisingly good and thoughtful sci-fi action based on Edgar Rice Buroughs’ century-old novel. Definitely worth a look. Rated PG-13

wooDy harrelson, roBin wrighT, sigourney weaver, Ben FosTer, neD BeaTTy, iCe CuBe, sTeve BusCemi, anne heChe, CynThia niXon Police Crime Drama Character study of the descent of a corrupt police officer into the abyss of his own excesses. A brilliantly made but extremely uncomfortable film centered on one police officer, which is anchored to a terrifically compelling performance by Woody Harrelson. It loses steam toward the end, but is overall powerful. Rated R

ryan reynolDs, DenZel washingTon, BrenDan gleeson, vera Farmiga, sam sheParD Action Thriller The guard at a CIA safe house is forced to go on the run with Amercia’s greatest traitor. A dull and humorless action film that’s made even worse by uninspired filmmaking and a wasted cast. Rated R

ewan mCgregor, emily BlunT, amr wakeD, krisTin sCoTT Thomas, Tom mison, raChael sTirling Romantic Comedy Drama A Scottish fishery expert is pushed into working on the wild scheme of a wealthy sheikh to transport salmon to Yemen. Full of empty calories and lacking the bite its screwy premise suggests, Salmon Fishing in the Yemen gets by pretty nicely on pure charm and a splendid cast. Rated PG-13

THIN ICE JJJJ

greg kinnear, Billy CruDuP, DaviD harBour, alan arkin, lea ThomPson, BoB BalaBan Black Comedy Crime Thriller A dishonest insurance salesman sees a chance to correct some losses with a spot of larceny—only to find himself embroiled ever deeper in trouble as a result. A convoluted, entertaining dark comedy involving varying levels of duplicity. Ultimately, it’s on the shallow side and mostly scores points for clever plotting, but it’s enjoyable. Rated R

THIS MEANS WAR JJ

reese wiThersPoon, Tom harDy, Chris Pine, Til sChweiger, Chelsea hanDler Action Romcom Two best friends—and CIA agents—find out they’re dating the same woman, and decide to compete over her. Yet another flat, formulaic rom-com, injected with an overdose of machismo. Rated R

A THOuSANd WORdS JJ

eDDie murPhy, kerry washingTon, CliFF CurTis, Clark Duke, ruBy Dee High-Concept Comedy A fast-talking literary agent becomes magically linked to a tree that loses a leaf for every word he speaks—and when the leaves run out, he dies. Occasionally awful, sometimes far too ambitious for its own good, but mostly just forgettable. Rated PG-13

THE vOW JJ

raChel mCaDams, Channing TaTum, JessiCa lange, sam neill, JessiCa mCnamee, sCoTT sPeeDman Excessively Goopy Romance A woman wakes up after a car accident to find that she doesn’t remember her own husband or the past several years of her life. Glossy, but empty romantic soap opera that suffers from a simple-minded script, merely adequate direction and some miscasting. Rated PG-13

local and area filming — as well as the positive impact that a huge hit like this has on a movie year stuck in the doldrums — the best I can say about the film on its own merit is that it’s massively OK. Strip away the often silly production design and the even sillier “futuristic” make-up and costuming (in the future, will everyone with money really dress like they’ve stepped out of a touring company of The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert?), and there’s a reasonably solid action picture underneath. No more — despite intimations of something weightier and subversive — but certainly no less. Assuming for the moment that there’s anyone out there who doesn’t know the premise, the film is set some vague time in the future when North America has become something called Panem (which is Latin for bread) that is divided into 13 districts lorded over by a capital referred to as the Capitol — but which comes across a lot like the Emerald City. It’s controlled by President Snow (Donald Sutherland, smartly underplaying). In order to memorialize when the Capitol successfully put down a rebellion by the 12 outlying districts 75 years earlier, the rulers have established the Hunger Games. This also serves to continue to punish the rebel districts and to demonstrate the absolute authority of the Capitol. The idea is that two contestants — called tributes — between the ages of 12 and 18 are chosen from each district by lottery. The hapless 24 are then pitted against each other in a fight to the death in the woods — with only one winner. (Kind of like ancient Rome without the coliseum, but with children and TV coverage.) The story focuses on Katniss (Jennifer Lawrence in a role not very different, albeit sometimes more glamorous, from the one in Winter’s Bone), who hails from District 12 (which would appear to be located in Shakycam, Appalachia, where they’re too poor to afford a tripod). She’s unusual in that she volunteered to become a tribute in order to take the place of her little sister. Of slightly less interest is her fellow tribute, Peeta (Josh Hutcherson), who once threw her a loaf of burned bread from his mother’s bakery. (Why he’s called Peeta, I don’t know. Maybe he was named by a Bette Davis impersonator.) There is, of course, some kind of burgeoning romance here, which is not only complicated by the oafish hunk back home (Liam Hemsworth, The Last Song), but by the reality that one of them has to die in the games. There’s a double-mickey plot twist for this, which I won’t reveal, but which — like most of the film’s surprises — you’ll probably predict. There are agreeable bits in the film. Woody Harrelson as the pair’s perpetually soused trainer gives quite the best performance in the film. It’s hard to actually fault any of the performances, but most of the actors just aren’t given especially memorable material to work with. The games themselves are exciting enough — if numerous points are pretty predictable — but I doubt I’ll remember much about them down the line. The whole film, while adequate and entertaining, feels altogether too safe. (Well, they picked the right director for safe.) Certainly, it’s too safe to make the kind of subversive impression suggested by the whole concept of an oppressive government and an extreme version of reality TV. Without reading the sequels

or knowing anything about them, I have a pretty good idea where this is leading, and the followup films may be a bit braver than this one. As it is, this one is solid enough, but for a non-fan fairly unremarkable. Rated PG-13 for intense violent thematic material and disturbing images — all involving teens. reviewed by Ken Hanke Playing at Carolina Asheville Cinema 14, Coed of Brevard, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande, United Artists Beaucatcher Cinema 7

Salmon FiShing in the Yemen JJJJ

Director: Lasse HaLLström (ChoColat) PLayers: ewan mcGreGor, emiLy BLunt, amr wakeD, kristin scott tHomas, tom mison, racHaeL stirLinG Romantic comedY dRama

Rated Pg-13

The Story: A Scottish fishery expert is pushed into working on the wild scheme of a wealthy sheikh to transport salmon to Yemen. The Lowdown: Full of empty calories and lacking the bite its screwy premise suggests, Salmon Fishing in the Yemen gets by pretty nicely on pure charm and a splendid cast. Despite its agreeably quirky title (taken from its source novel), a poster that seemingly wants to make you think of the magic of last year’s Midnight in Paris, an off-beat premise and a deliciously bitchy performance from Kristin Scott Thomas, the truth is that Lasse Hallström’s Salmon Fishing in the Yemen is at bottom a pretty basic romantic comedy of the comfort-food variety. I am given to understand that Simon Beaufoy’s (Slumdog Millionaire) screenplay softens Paul Torday’s satirical novel into a harmless confection, but it’s a harmless confection whipped together by experts and built around the not-inconsiderable charm of Ewan McGregor and Emily Blunt — and pretty hard not to warm up to. Except for Kristin Scott Thomas, the film is rarely all that funny, but it is immensely likable. Maybe I’m being overly generous because it has rescued the usually pleasant Hallström from that ill-advised Nicholas Sparks goo-fest Dear John (2010) — but Salmon Fishing is one of the few truly enjoyable films I’ve seen this year. And Kristin Scott Thomas’ sharp-tongued character keeps things from getting altogether too sweet. The concept is that the absurdly wealthy Sheikh Muhammed (Amr Waked) — an avid fly fisherman — has taken it into his head to import salmon to Yemen. He has it in mind to create a salmon run, which in turn will provide irrigation and more farmable land for his people. Normally, such a plan would be of no interest to the British government, but Patricia Maxwell (Scott Thomas), press secretary to the prime minister, is in search of some positive news about the Middle East, and this might fit the bill. Scottish fishery expert Dr. Alfred Jones (McGregor) has already turned down the Sheikh’s assistant, Harriet (Blunt), when the idea was first put to him. Now, with

Her Majesty’s government supporting it, he’s blackmailed into accepting what he considers an utterly unworkable, if not downright insane project. Shorn of its complications involving Jones’ distant and cool wife (Brit TV actress Rachael Stirling), Harriet’s M.I.A. soldier boyfriend (Tom Mison, One Day) and some political intrigue, the bulk of the story really is about setting up this salmon run — with time given over to the inevitable romance between Fred and Harriet. Much of what makes it work comes down to its stars. In fact, I’m not sure that McGregor has been quite this purely likable since Moulin Rouge! (2001), though he’s certainly been in better movies than this. Rather typically because it is a Lasse Hallström picture, most everyone ends up with the fate they appear to deserve. It is believable? No, of course, it isn’t, but it never pretends to be anything other than a movie. Rated PG-13 for some violence and sexual content, and brief language. reviewed by Ken Hanke Starts Friday at Fine Arts Theatre

lookhere Don’t miss out on Cranky Hanke’s online-only weekly columns “Screening Room” and “Weekly Reeler,” plus extended reviews of special showings, as well as an archive of past Xpress movie reviews — all at mountainx.com/movies.

SPECIALIZING IN AFFORDABLE, CREATIVE AND R E S P O N S I B LY- B U I LT GREEN HOMES

JAMES BOREN DEVELOPER

BOTH WALKABLE TO DOWNTOWN WEST ASHEVILLE!

$292,000 S CAN FO R D I R ECT I O NS TO T H ES E H O U S ES !

$389,000

AMAN DA BORE N , BROKE R ASSOCIAT E

828. 713. 7049

W W W. M Y M O S A I C R E A LT Y. C O M

mountainx.com • MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 65

66 MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 • mountainx.com

No Junk. No Scams.

Want to advertise in Marketplace? call: 828-251-1333 x138 email: amanning@mountainx.com • on the web: mountainx.com/classiﬁeds

Handy Man

Real Estate

Homes For Sale

1000’s OF ASHEVILLE HOMES! On our user friendly property search. New features include Google Mapping and Popular Neighborhood searches. Check it out at www.townandmountain.com

ASHEVILLE REAL ESTATE SALES Save money on Homes, Condos and Land with Green Mountain Realty: Showings 7 Days/week. (828) 215-9064. BuyingAshevilleRealEstate.com

Condos For Sale

HIRE A HUSBAND Handyman Services. 31 years professional business practices. Trustworthy, quality results, reliability. $2 million liability insurance. References available. Free estimates. Stephen Houpis, (828) 280-2254. J.E.D HOME HANDYMAN SERVICES Experienced Handyman for Multiple Types of Small Projects, Excellent Troubleshooter, Free Estimates. 30 Years of Experience. Call John - 828-702-2829. john@moonlightingwnc.com

Commercial/ Business Rentals 1500 SQFT • HENDERSONVILLE ROAD Great space in busy complex in South Asheville. Parking at the door. Call 828 691-0586. DOWNTOWN OFFICE SPACE For lease. Above City Bakery, Biltmore Avenue. Approximately 775 sqft. Natural light. Spacious. info@sycamorepartners.net

Rentals Services

AFFORDABLE ASHEVILLE HOMES • Luxury homes • Eco-Green Homes • Condos • Foreclosures. (828) 215-9064. AshevilleNCRealty.com ASHEVILLE HOMES NEW LISTINGS Free Daily Emails of New Listings - provided by Green Mountain Realty: (828) 215-9064. AshevilleListingUpdates.com

^ŵĂůů ŐƌĞĞŶ ĐŽƩĂŐĞƐ ƚŽ Įƚ Ăůů ďƵĚŐĞƚƐ ĂŶĚ ƐƚǇůĞƐ͘ ^ƟĐŬ ďƵŝůƚ ĂŶĚ ĨƵůůǇ ĐƵƐƚŽŵŝǌĂďůĞ͘

AMAZING PRICE! 2BR, 1.5BA Condominium. West Asheville. $79,900. Completely remodeled. Excellent Condition. All recent appliances. New Central Air and Heat. 918 sq. ft. Split level. Canterbury Heights. 828-253-9451.

Real Estate Wanted LAND WANTED • LEASES Paying Top Dollar for 5, 10, 20 Acre or Larger Flat Land Tracts in WNC for 25 Year Land Leases. Call Green Mountain Realty: 828-215-9064.

ϭϮϬͲϲϰϬ ƐƋ Ō͘ Ψϳ͘ϱͲϱϳŬ ͻ ŶĞƌŐǇ ĸĐŝĞŶƚ ͻ>Žǁ ŽƐƚ

ǁǁǁ͘ĐŽŵƉĂĐƚĐŽƩĂŐĞƐ͘ĐŽŵ

ϵϵŬ

HORSE BOARDING • Rent horse stalls. Luch 30 acre pasture. Two times daily turnout. Large padded stalls, individual lockers, tackroom. Private mountain trail rides. Call 828-687-9965.

Computer CHRISTOPHER’S COMPUTERS • Computer Slow? Call Christopher’s Computers at 828-670-9800 and let us help you with PC and Macintosh issues: networking, virus/malware removal, tutoring, upgrades, custombuilt new computers, etc. ChristophersComputers.com

1 GREAT DOWNTOWN APARTMENT Live, work and play downtown! • Studio: $595/month each. No pets please. Call (828) 254-2229. 3BR, 1BA WEST ASHEVILLE • Water, garbage included. On bus line. Swimming pool onsite. $699/month. Call 828-252-9882. ADJACENT TO UNCA • NORTH ASHEVILLE Fully furnished apartment, 2BR, 2BA, $950/month plus deposit. • Includes all utilities, AC, CCTV, Internet. Private parking. (828) 252-0035.

Commercial Listings Home Services

Heating & Cooling

>ĂŶĚͬ,ŽŵĞ ƉĂĐŬĂŐĞƐ

Outdoor Recreation

Apartments For Rent

MAYBERRY HEATING AND COOLING Oil and Gas Furnaces • Heat Pumps and AC • Sales • Service • Installation. • Visa • MC • Discover. Call (828) 658-9145.

Commercial Property OFFICE SUITES Downtown Asheville. 1-5 office suites from 490 sq. ft. to 3,200 sq. ft. Modern finishes, elevator, central air. Affordable, full service rates. G/M Property Group 828-281-4024. jmenk@gmproperty.com

CHARMING HISTORIC MONTFORD 1BR with sunroom. Hardwood floors, cedar lined closets and gas heat. $650/month includes hot and cold water. Security deposit, year’s lease, credit check and references req. 1 cat ok w/fee. For appt: Graham Investments 253-6800. NEAR DOWNTOWN. ALL NEW. 1BR, 1BA. Renovated. $850/month. Charming neighborhood. New kitchen, bath, lighting. DW MW, custom dining table. Hardwood floors. W/D. No smoking. 828.230.5990.

Mobile Homes For Rent 2BR, 2BA MOBILE • On private lot in Hendersonville. $600/month + security. 828685-8747 or 828-231-2979.

Condos/ Townhomes For Rent WEST ASHEVILLE CANTERBURY HEIGHTS • 46 Beri Dr. Updated 2BR 1.5BA. Split level condo, 918 sqft. Fully applianced upgraded kitchen with W/D. Pool, fitness room. $735/month. Security Dep. Application Fee. Available 5/1/12. Mike 919-624-1513.

Short-Term Rentals 15 MINUTES TO ASHEVILLE Guest house, vacation/short term rental in beautiful country setting. • Complete with everything including cable and internet. • $130/day, $650/week, $1500/month. Weaverville area. • No pets please. (828) 658-9145. mhcinc58@yahoo.com SUMMER RENTAL W. ASHEVILLE Bright, sunny 1BR + office townhouse. June 15 through August 5. A/C, water, internet included. $225/week. 828-713-6902.

Wanted to Rent BRAND NEW 1, 2 and 3 APARTMENTS • In N. Asheville mixed-use community. Granite throughout, high ceilings, pet friendly, energy efficient, salt water pool. www.TheLoftsAsheville.com 828-225-6621

CLEAN, QUIET SPACE • Asheville native coming back home. Young 60-year old seeks room for rent. No drugs or alcohol. Price range $400$500 inclusive. Close to downtown. Month-to-month okay. Will be willing to do some work in exchange. Excellent references. 828-712-8340 or thomasmarcum23@gmail.com

Roommates

Quality controlled local listings for WNC.

ALL AREAS ROOMMATES.COM. Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: www.Roommates.com. (AAN CAN)

Employment

General $$$HELP WANTED$$$ Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operators Now! 1-800-405-7619 EXT 2450 www.easywork-greatpay.com (AAN CAN) FUNDRAISER • Our company is seeking one individual to work in our fund raising department on behalf of an Asheville based professional Nonprofit organization. • Since 1942 this Association has served its members and residents of the Asheville area in an effort to save lives and protect property. • This is a full time, permanent position offering opportunity for career advancement. The job detail involves cold calling local residents as well as previous contributors selling tickets for benefit concerts at the US Cellular Arena (Asheville Civic center). Inside sales only from our local Asheville office, no door to door or travel required. • This position requires a person who is personable and confident with a strong speaking voice. • Compensation will consist of a two week training period paid at $9 per hour after which we pay $12 per hour plus a weekly commission program. Typical earnings are $550 - $650 per week. This is a great opportunity for you to earn a good livable wage working with a respected local organization in Asheville. Sales experience beneficial but not required. • We will train the right person who has the desire to succeed. If you feel this is you, please call our human resource number at 828-236-2530 and ask for Brent.

mountainx.com/classiﬁeds

F[ji e\ j^[ M[[a Adopt a Friend • Save a Life CLIFFORD Male/Neutered Hound/Mix 5 Months

SILAS Male/Neutered Domestic Shorthair/Mix 1 Year

BATMAN Male/Neutered Terrier/American Pitbull Mix 7 Months

7i^[l_bb[ >kcWd[ IeY_[jo 14 Forever Friend Lane, Asheville, NC 828-761-2001 • AshevilleHumane.org

mountainx.com

Buncombe County Friends For Animals, Inc.

• MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012

Restaurant/ Food

jobs HIGHLY RATED LOCAL BIKE SHOP • Is seeking experienced mechanics and sales people. All applicants must be friendly, outgoing, and have a passion for bicycles. Strong sales and computer skills a plus. The position is part time to full time. Pay depends upon experience. Please respond to bikeshop2006 @gmail.com with resume and or qualifications

THE SOAPY DOG • Now hiring part-time kennel staff for our new boarding facility, “The Sleepy Dog”. Experience required. Email resume and references to: ashevillesoapydog@gmail.com

HIRING LIFE-GUARDS FOR LOCAL SWIMMING CLUBS Swim Club Management Group is hiring life-guards for local country clubs. Please apply at www.lifeguardasheville.com

EXPERIENTIAL MARKETING PROGRAM COORDINATOR Program Coordinator needed for fast paced Event Staffing Agency. Please email resume and salary history to: amcgurty@ eventprostrategies.com www.eventprostrategies.com

INVENTORY SUPERVISOR Inventory Supervisor needed for fast growing alternative fuel conversion company. High yield inventory experience required. Responsibilities include overseeing and directing the shipping, receiving and inventory departments. Contact Lena at lenak@altecheco.com STEEL FABRICATION SPECIALIST Must have skills in welding, soldering and metallurgy. Ability to interpret blueprints and technical drawings to correctly assemble products. Acumen in math is required to calculate temperance and adjust construction angles. Skills in reading complex instructions are required. Oral communication abilities are needed to effectively work with other steel fabricators since much of the manufacturing process involves teamwork. Pay based on experience. Full time job. Contact Lena at lenak@altecheco.com

Administrative/ Office

THE VAN WINKLE LAW FIRM • Seeks an experienced Litigation Paralegal for its Asheville Office. This individual will work within a team to prepare litigation documents, produce and respond to discovery, maintain adherence to calendared court items and document requests, and otherwise assist attorneys in all aspects of pre-trial and trial practice. • A thorough knowledge of federal and state court rules and ESI issues is necessary. • Experience with Summation or other electronic discovery databases, and 5 or more years work experience, is preferred. Please send qualifications to hr@vwlawfirm.com

RECOVERY EDUCATION CENTER TEAM LEADER: Meridian Behavioral Health Services is an organization dedicated to quality and innovation in the delivery of rural behavioral health services. We are seeking a passionate, values-driven and dynamic professional to oversee our Macon/Jackson Recovery Education Center. This program reﬂects a unique design which integrates educational, clinical and peer support components in a center-based milieu. To be considered, an applicant should be familiar with the recovery paradigm of mental health and substance abuse services. A Master’s degree, license eligibility and previous supervisory experience are also required. For more information about Meridian and our Recovery Education Centers, go to www.meridianbhs.org. If interested, please contact Reid Smithdeal, Recovery Services Manager: reid.smithdeal@meridianbhs.org

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 •

Sales/ Marketing

INSIDE SALES LEADER Glass

DOWNTOWN RETAIL POSITION • Unique Shop seeks long term retail associate. Must be able to work independently, be strong salesperson, well organized. and a multi-tasker. Must be able to lift 50 pounds easily. Part time to start. Bring Resume to 12 Wall St. No phone calls, please.

Requirements: You must

EXECUTIVE SEARCH CONSULTANT If you are not afraid of talking to strangers on a telephone or hard work, we want to talk to you ASAP! No experience necessary; only great ability to conduct business in a professional manner. Great phone skills are helpful, as is, a persuasive personality. Great time management, organization and attention to detail are a must. Recruit in a booming industry! Draw plus 50% commission. Email resume to: info.mmg@mtnmg.com FUNDRAISER • Our company is seeking one individual to work in our fund raising department on behalf of an Asheville based professional Nonprofit organization. • Since 1942 this Association has served its members and residents of the Asheville area in an effort to save lives and protect property. • This is a full time, permanent position offering opportunity for career advancement. The job detail involves cold calling local residents as well as previous contributors selling tickets for benefit concerts at the US Cellular Arena (Asheville Civic center). Inside sales only from our local Asheville office, no door to door or travel required. • This position requires a person who is personable and confident with a strong speaking voice. • Compensation will consist of a two week training period paid at $9 per hour after which we pay $12 per hour plus a weekly commission program. Typical earnings are $550 - $650 per week. This is a great opportunity for you to earn a good livable wage working with a respected local organization in Asheville. Sales experience beneficial but not required. • We will train the right person who has the desire to succeed. If you feel this is you, please call our human resource number at 828-236-2530 and ask for Brent.

mountainx.com

Doctor of Asheville seeks an inside sales representative. understand the sales process; enjoy building positive long term relationships; Be enthusiastic, fast-paced, organized and have better than average computer and math skills while multitasking; • Have a solid knowledge of Asheville and its surrounding communities. This is a long term hourly plus commission PT position. Glass experience a plus. Please respond to glassdoctortony@gmail.com

FOOD SERVICE LEAD NEEDED • Eliada Homes is seeking a Food Service Lead to provide direction and assistance in preparation of food. Other duties include planning meals, purchasing food and supplies, and delivering food when needed. • The Lead will also train employees to company standards and set excellent customer service and work examples for staff. • Prefer Culinary Degree and at least five years of experience in food service preparation in large quantities. • Previous supervisory experience a plus. $12/hours. To apply, please to www.eliada.org/employment.

Hotel/Hospitality

MOUNTAIN XPRESS SEEKS ACCOUNT REPRESENTATIVE • Requirements: • You must understand the sales process and enjoy building long-term collaborative, win-win relationships; • Be ethical, gregarious, enthusiastic, fastpaced, and organized while multitasking; • Have a solid knowledge of Asheville and its surrounding communities; • Love Asheville’s multi-cultural, grassroots, enterprising community. Pluses: • You have two-years sales experience in print/media/ online sales; • Enjoy coldcalling; • Be an avid Xpress reader • Understand Xpress’ community-based journalistic mission We offer: • Baseplus-commission, health and dental insurance, IRA options and a progressive, flexible work environment. Send: Cover letter (that demonstrates your qualifications, passion and why you’d like to work with Xpress) and resume to: salesperson@mountainx.com. No phone calls please. SECURE YOUR FUTURE Start a career in Executive Search. • Make a six-figure income • Help people • Work in south Asheville • Salary available • resumes@thurmondco.com

B&B HOUSEKEEPER • PART-TIME Reliable and detail oriented a must. Transportation required. Experience not necessary, paid training provided. Lifting, stairs. Variable schedule • Montford. (828) 254-2244.

QI SPECIALIST NEEDED! Community Care of Western North Carolina is looking for a Quality Improvement Specialist to support the organization in achieving its goal of ensuring high quality, cost effective healthcare. Working in collaboration with the CCWNC leadership team, the QI Specialist will support the program’s quality performance objectives through utilization of established quality improvement methodologies; specifically PDSA, QI tools and techniques, and data analysis. A minimum of a Bachelor’s degree in Nursing; or a Bachelor’s degree in Business Administration, Project Management or a health related field combined with relevant quality improvement work experience in a health care setting is required. Work experience with responsibilities in the following areas: process improvement, data presentation, report writing, public speaking, team facilitation, and demonstrated problem solving skills is preferred. Submit resume to hr@ccwnc.org or fax to 828259-3875. EOE

Human Services

Drivers/Delivery MANNA FoodBank Is seeking a Full-time Delivery Driver. Must have CDL with 1-3 years experience. Heavy lifting required. Comp pay/ excellent benefits. Job Description and application on www.mannafoodbank.org E-mail or fax jhanson@feedingamerica.org 828-299-3664 (FAX). No Phone calls. EOE.

Medical/ Health Care CARE MANAGERS NEEDED! Community Care of Western North Carolina is looking for Care Managers! RN required. Minimum of 2 years case management experience preferred. Experience in maternal health or chronic illnesses preferred. Experience with Electronic Health Records, and Microsoft Word and Excel required. Bilingual in Spanish a plus. Submit resume to hr@ccwnc.org or fax to 828-259-3875. EOE FAMILIES NEEDED FOR IN-HOME PLACEMENT Loving families needed to open their homes to individuals with developmental disabilities. Specific needs are handicap accessible homes, also looking for homes in the Marion/Morganton and other areas for children. Similar to Foster Homes. Excellent salary, great opportunity! Davidson Homes 828-299-1720 ext 265 www.davidsonhomes.org

AVAILABLE POSITIONS • MERIDIAN BEHAVIORAL HEALTH Haywood County: Recovery Education Center Clinician Position available within an innovative MH/SA recovery-oriented program. Must have Master’s degree and be license-eligible. Please contact Kim Franklin, kim.franklin@meridianbhs.org. Jackson/Macon County: Recovery Education Center Clinician Position available within an innovative MH/SA recovery-oriented program. Must have Master’s degree and be license-eligible. Please contact Reid Smithdeal, reid.smithdeal@meridianbhs.org Cherokee County: Clinician Assertive Community Treatment Team (ACTT) Must have a Master’s degree and be license-eligible. Please contact Ben Haffey, ben.haffey@meridianbhs.org Team Leader Assertive Community Treatment Team (ACTT) Must have Master’s degree and be license-eligible. Please contact Ben Haffey, ben.haffey@meridianbhs.org Continued next column

JJTC Team Clinician Seeking Licensed/Provisionally Licensed Therapist in Cherokee County for an exciting opportunity to serve predominately court referred youth and their families through Intensive In-Home and Basic Benefit Therapy. For more information contact Aaron Plantenberg, aaron.plantenberg@ meridianbhs.org Swain County: JJTC Team Clinician Seeking Licensed/Provisionally Licensed Therapist in Swain County for an exciting opportunity to serve predominately court referred youth and their families through Intensive In-Home and Basic Benefit Therapy. For more information contact Aaron Plantenberg, aaron.plantenberg@ meridianbhs.org • For further information and to complete an application, visit our website: www.meridianbhs.org F/T IN-HOME EDUCATOR • This position provides homebased instruction that focuses on supporting the parent-child relationship, parent education and personal development, child development and family health and wellness promotion. • Must be very organized and efficient with managing record keeping and schedules. • BA/BS in ECE, Social Work, or related field preferred. Need reliable transportation and flexibility to occasionally meet families for an evening or weekend appointment. • Fluency in Spanish or Russian preferred. For an application and to learn more about our amazing child and family program, visit www.macfc.org or send resume’s and interest letters to macfcjobs@macfc.org. EOE employer

FAMILIES TOGETHER INC. Due to continuous growth in WNC, Families Together, Inc is now hiring licensed professionals and Qualified Professionals in Buncombe, McDowell, Madison, Rutherford, Henderson, and Transylvania Counties. • Qualified candidates will include • LPC’s, LCSW’s, LMFT’s, LCAS’s, PLCSW’s, or LPCA’s and Bachelor’s and Master’s Qualified Professionals. • FTI provides a positive work environment, flexible hours, room for advancement, health benefits, and an innovative culture. • www.familiestogether.net • Candidates should email resumes to humanresources@ familiestogether.net

FAMILY PRESERVATION SERVICES OF HENDERSONVILLE, has opportunities for Qualified Mental Health Professionals to join our team. Qualified candidates should have a bachelor’s degree in a social services field and a minimum of 1 year experience with children with mental illness. FPS offers a competitive and comprehensive benefit package. To join our team, please send your resume to jdomansky@fpscorp.com FULL TIME THERAPIST • Four Circles Recovery Center, a wilderness substance abuse recovery program for young adults, is seeking a full time licensed Therapist to deliver clinical care to clients and families in recovery in a way that maximizes independence and family empowerment. • Duties include client care and treatment planning, individual, family, and group therapy, crisis intervention, psychoeducation and case management. • A Masters Degree or PhD in a behavioral health discipline and Licensure in behavioral health required. • Must have strong clinical and interpersonal skills, strong organizational skills and excellent written and verbal communication skills. Wilderness experience preferred. Please send all inquiries to jobs@fourcirclesrecovery.com.

MAKE A DIFFERENCE NC Mentor is offering free informational meetings to those who are interested in becoming therapeutic foster parents. The meetings will be held on the 2nd Tuesday 6:30pm-7:30pm (snacks provided) and 4th Friday 12pm-1pm (lunch provided). • If you are interested in making a difference in a child’s life, please call Rachel Wingo at (828) 696-2667 ext 15 or e-mail Rachel at rachel.wingo@ thementornetwork.com • Become a Therapeutic Foster Family. • Free informational meeting. NC Mentor. 120C Chadwick Square Court, Hendersonville, NC 28739.

Professional/ Management

PARKWAY BEHAVIORAL HEALTH Has an immediate opening for a Community Support Team Leader for our combined Avl/Hvl team. • Candidates need to be licensed or provisionally licensed, have a clean driving record, safe vehicle and leadership skills. • This service is a primarily delivered in the community to high risk mental health and substance abuse consumers. • Knowledge of WHN and Medicaid paperwork a plus. Parkway is a stable company and has an excellent benefits package and competitive salaries. Please email resumes to: slayton@parkwaybh.com

THE ASHEVILLE OFFICE OF FAMILY PRESERVATION SERVICES • Is seeking the following for adult service lines: Fully-licensed LCSW, supervisory experience preferred. Program Director/QP for PSR. Both positions are fulltime, salaried, with benefits. Please send resumes to csimpson@fpscorp.com.

QUALIFIED PROFESSIONAL CAROLINA OUTREACH • For Intensive In-Home Team in Buncombe County, experienced with children/families in MH, cover letter and resume to westernregion@ carolinaoutreach.com

THERAPIST • CAROLINA OUTREACH for Intensive In-Home Team in Buncombe County, licensed or provisional, cover letter and resume to westernregion@ carolinaoutreach.com

QUALIFIED PROFESSIONAL • State-wide provider of I/DD services has immediate opening for a QP in our Asheville location. • This position is responsible for hiring, training, and supervision of direct care staff working one on one with persons with intellectual and developmental disabilities. • Candidates must have at minimum a bachelor’s degree in a human services field plus two years’ postdegree I/DD experience. • A bachelor’s degree in a field other than human services plus four years’ post-degree experience in I/DD may also be considered. • Criminal and MVR investigations will be conducted. • Qualified and interested persons should send a resume along with letter of interest to QP Position 5 Mountain View Rd Asheville, NC 28805.

WNC Group Homes for Autistic Persons is hiring for Residential Counselor positions. Full Time 3rd shift, Part Time 1st shift, and weekends. Each qualified applicant must have High School Diploma and 2 years experience, or College degree. Apply in person at 28 Pisgah View Ave Asheville. Please view our website for additional information. www.wncgrouphomes.org

Caregivers/ Nanny CAREGIVER NEEDED • Help with transfers, housekeeping, grocery shopping, driving, typing and errands. CNA experience preferred. 4pm8pm, $10/hour. 828-424-7203.

ArtSpace Charter School Is now accepting applications for the position of Assistant Director. The AD will support the Executive Director in management of students and staff. • Duties will include: curriculum development, student discipline, parent communication, program development and management, and staff development. Applicants must be willing to work in a collaborative, integrated, experiential environment. • Applicants MUST have excellent verbal and written communication skills, classroom teaching experience, experience teaching reading, and strong knowledge of the NC Essential Standards and the Common Core (Mathematics and ELA). • Knowledge of the arts and arts integration strategies, an advanced degree and NC licensure in administration is preferred, but not required. Please send resumes and cover letters to: resumes@artspacecharter.org with the subject heading “Assistant Director”. Deadline April 15. MANAGEMENT Growing local business seeking mature professional for administrative and managerial duties. Mac, Excel spreadsheet, database entry and creative design experience. Full-time. No smokers. Call Ms. Willis: (828) 230-5125. VOLUNTEER TRAINING AND OUTREACH PROGRAM DIRECTOR Direct Volunteer Training and Outreach Program; Coordinate VISTA program and support PTO/Board Development. Visit acsf.org for description and requirements.

Teaching/ Education

CHAIR, BIOLOGY DEPT. A-B TECH • F/T Regular. The Chair provides leadership and coordination of the Biology Department; ensures that all courses within the department meet the educational needs of students, transfer institutions, and associated programs; recruits qualified faculty – both full time and adjunct; supervises, develops, and evaluates faculty; coordinates and administers annual planning, evaluation, and budgeting for the department; coordinates development of departmental schedule; works collaboratively with other department chairs in divisions across campus. The chair coordinates the work of the department to support career and technical students, college transfer students and the elective courses open to all students. • Salary Range: $57,168-$58,956. Please visit https://abtcc.peopleadmin.com /postings/828 for expanded job description and application process. F/T CLASSROOM ASSISTANT (FLOATER) • For Riceville, Mountain Area Child and Family Center. Qualified candidates will have exp. working with toddlers in a licensed center. AAS/BA/BS in ECE preferred. For an application and to learn more about our amazing child and family program, visit www.macfc.org or send resume’s and interest letters to mfoley@macfc.org.

CLASSROOM EDUCATOR • EAST ASHEVILLE If you love children, love learning, and would love to participate in an innovative approach to early childhood development then MACFC would love to talk with you! The ideal candidate has 3+ years of high quality classroom leadership w/a B-K or 4 year ECE degree. Strong knowledge of NC licensing requirements, NAEYC standards, and TS Gold preferred. Full-Time plus competitive benefits package including vol. medical/dental/matching 403b, life insurance, PTO, Holiday pay, CEU’s, and more! For an application and to learn more about our amazing child and family program, visit www.macfc.org or send resume’s and interest letters to mfoley@macfc.org SUBSTITUTE CLASSROOM EDUCATOR • Mountain Area Child and Family Center, Candler and E. Asheville Centers. Experienced, caring individuals with knowledge of developmentally appropriate practice needed. A degree in ECE, Child Development or related field is preferred. Flexible Schedule! Great way to learn best practices! visit www.macfc.org or send resume’s and interest letters to mfoley@macfc.org

Business Opportunities HELP WANTED • Make money mailing brochures from home. Free supplies. Helping homeworkers since 2001. Genuine opportunity. No experience required. Start immediately. www.theworkhub.net (AAN CAN)

WOULD $500 EXTRA A MONTH MAKE A DIFFERENCE? Business opportunity for motivated individuals able to invest and grow their monthly income. Eco-green technology company. For more information please call. Call 423-791-5563.

Announcements PREGNANT CONSIDERING ADOPTION? • Talk with caring agency specializing in matching birthmothers with families nationwide • Living expenses paid. Call 24/7 • Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions • 1-866-413-6293. (AAN CAN)

Mind, Body, Spirit

NAMASTE MASSAGE PROFESSIONAL, THERAPEUTIC, AFFORDABLE Swedish, Deep Tissue, Reflexology, Ashiatsu, & more www.namastemassage7.com SHOJI SPA & LODGE • 7 DAYS A WEEK Looking for the best therapist in town—or a cheap massage? Soak in your outdoor hot tub; melt in our sauna; then get the massage of your life! 26 massage therapists. 299-0999. www.shojiretreats.com TOP NOTCH PROFESSIONAL MASSAGE! Deep tissue specialist. Tension and pain release! Brett Rodgers - LMBT #7557 ww.vitalitymassage.net (828) 645-5228.

Bodywork ASHEVILLE MASSAGE FOR WOMEN • Jess Toan, LMBT 7445, MA in Women’s Health. Deep Tissue, Hot Stones, Prenatal, Swedish, Reiki, and Oncology Massage. $50 for first massage. http://ashevillemassage forwomen.vpweb.com, 828552-6609, jesstoan14@ gmail.com. Experienced, professional, and attentive. Call today! You won’t regret it.

Musicians’ Xchange

Spiritual SPIRIT COMMUNICATION Consumed with grief? Connect with your loved one! Private Sessions - limited time $50. Healings/Readings/Massage 928-301-8132 www.spiritual-connections.biz

ASHEVILLE’S WHITEWATER RECORDING Full service studio services since 1987. • Mastering • Mixing and Recording. • CD/DVD duplication at the best prices. (828) 684-8284 • whitewaterrecording.com

B[Whd JhWZ_j_edWb 7ffWbWY^_Wd Cki_Y

#1 AFFORDABLE COMMUNITY CONSCIOUS MASSAGE AND YOGA CENTER • 1224 Hendersonville Road. Asheville. $33/hour. • 20 Wonderful Therapists to choose from. Therapeutic Massage: • Deep Tissue • Swedish • Sports • Trigger Point. • Also offering: • Acupressure • Energy Work • Reflexology. • Save money, call now! 505-7088. www.thecosmicgroove.com AWESOME MASSAGE CONTINUING EDUCATION! 10 different low cost classes including Ashiatsu barefoot massage! Brett Rodgers NCBTMB #451495-10 www.vitalitymassage.net (828) 645-5228

ILLUMINATING YOUR PATH Call Master Psychic Intuitive, Nina Anin. • 15 years in Asheville. • Individuals • Groups • Parties. (828) 253-7472. ninaanin@weebly.com

m_j^

7ZWc JWdd[h • Fiddle • Mandolin • Guitar

All Levels Welcome Rental Instruments Available

.(. +.(#'&,,

mmm$WZWcjWdd[hcki_Y$Yec

mountainx.com

• MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012

homeimprovement Creations Kitchen & Bath

in Stone

www.creationsinstonenc.com

Place Your Ad on this Page! - Call 828-458-9195

Stone Countertops • All Wood Cabinets • Tile • Hardwood

828.645.7600

10 Garrison Branch Rd • Weaverville, NC 28787

AFFORDABLE • DURABLE • UNIQUELY ATTRACTIVE!

0AUL #ARON

Metal Rooﬁng starting at 75¢ per linear foot Largest Color Selection

Pet Xchange

Pet Services ASHEVILLE PET SITTERS Dependable, loving care while you’re away. Reasonable rates. Call Sandy Ochsenreiter, (828) 215-7232.

Pets for Adoption

Furniture Magician

Locally Owned & Operated

www.triadmetalroof.com / 828.686.3860

• Cabinet Refacing • Furniture Repair

HOME IMPROVEMENT SECTION • Reach 70,000 Loyal Readers Every Week • Nearly 30,000 Issues • Covering 730 Locations Throughout Western NC Reserve Your Space Today!

CALL RICK AT

828-458-9195

Help Is On The Way Cooking • Cleaning • Shopping Laundry • Organizing Sewing • Gardening Packing For Moves • Catering

Call Suzan 828-777-4435

Excellent References Available

Small Jobs • Handyman Services • Home Repairs Not Handy? Call Andy!

Andy OnCall

• Carpentry • Flat Screen TV Hanging • Painting • Drywall • Finished Basements • Bathroom Remodels • Ceramic Tile • Odd Jobs

• Fix A Fence • Hardwood Floors • Cabinets • Decks • Remodels • Windows & Doors • Crown Molding • And More!

LICENSED • BONDED • INSURED

No Payment Until The Job Is Complete! Priced By The Job, Not By The Hour! Evening/Weekend Appointments Available Locally Owned & Operated

• Seat Caning • Antique Restoration • Custom Furniture & Cabinetry (828)

669-4625 • Black Mountain

Advertising doesn’t cost...

IT PAYS! (828) 251-1333

THIS OFFER IS NOT TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE

GYPSY is a one year old German Shepherd/Corgi mix and you are going to kick yourself if you miss the chance to meet this amazing dog! She has a German Shepherd-sized personality with a Corgi- sized body. This little girl has never met a stranger. She is energetic and playful, as well as cuddly. She would love to be a part of your family! . Stop by Animal Compassion Network’s store for rescued pets, Pet Harmony located at 803 Fairview Street, Asheville, North Carolina 28803 to shop for all your pet supplies.

PRETTY is very mellow and laid back. She is the ultimate lap cat - sweet, loving and a napper supreme. If you want to relax on the couch and cuddle up with Pretty, she’s waiting for you. Stop by Animal Compassion Network’s store for rescued pets, Pet Harmony located at 803 Fairview Street, Asheville, North Carolina 28803 to shop for all your pet supplies.

Automotive

Automotive Services WE’LL FIX IT AUTOMOTIVE • Honda and Acura repair. Half price repair and service. ASE and factory certified. Located in the Weaverville area. Please call 828-275-6063 for appointment.

SAFETY FIRST

TAKE $300 OFF ANY $1,000

HOME IMPROVEMENT PROJECT

LAWSON’S

OVER 10 YEARS EXPERIENCE

No job too small!

Free Estimates • One Year Written Warranty

HANDYMAN & HOME IMPROVEMENT

828-545-6806

OWNER CHRIS LAWSON FREE ESTIMATES - INSURED

ONE YEAR WRITTEN GUARANTEE RENOVATING - REMODELS PAINTING - DRYWALL - TILE HARDWOOD FLOORS - SHEDS - TRIM FENCING - DECKS - ROOFING

YOUR ONE CALL DOES IT ALL

Tree Pruning & Care • Tree Removal Stump Removal • Lot Clearing Chipping • Complete Cleanups

828-273-3467 Mention this ad after service for +0:*6<5; LICENSED & INSURED • FREE ESTIMATES

MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012 •

mountainx.com

For Sale

Sporting Goods Evinrude Boat Motor For Sale Evinrude 2008 6hp 4 stroke motor. Less than 50 hours run time. Paid $1,600 - Want $1,000 firm. Call 828-337-1151.

Tools & Machinery

BobCAT 2002 Only 1507 hours. 773-G Series, Skid Steer tracks over tires, wood splitter 48’, Brush Bandit bush hog. $15,000. This a great deal! Please call 828-551-4156.

Furniture QUEEN PILLOW TOP MATTRESS SET. New still in plastic. $125 Call 828-989-1147 can help with delivery.

Wanted CASH FOR CARS: Any Car/Truck. Running or Not! Top Dollar Paid. We Come To You! Call For Instant Offer: 1-888-420-3808 www.cash4car.com

Sales

Yard Sales THIS SATURDAY 8am-Noon, March 31. Lots of amazing household items, everything from furniture to garden tools! Beautiful quality. • 49 Haywood Road, West Asheville.

Adult Services DREAMSEEKERS Your destination for relaxation. Call for your appointment. Now available 7 days a week! (828) 275-4443. A WOMAN'S TOUCH "We're all about you!" Call 275-6291.

The New York Times Crossword Edited by Will Shortz No.0222 Across 1 Act greedy 5 Newsman Lou 10 Stand taken by a debater 14 Elton John/Tim Rice musical 15 ___ Gay 16 Austen heroine 17 Jeering from the bleachers 18 Broom made of twigs 19 Crazy sort 20 End of some medieval tournament action? 23 Charger 26 Part of the translation of “anno Domini” 27 Weapons that hit in a medieval tournament? 33 Sum up 34 Holy book 35 Middleton and Moss

38 Estuaries 40 Track figure 42 Flood survivor 43 “The Most Happy ___” 45 Imitated a wolf 47 Spanish bear 48 Really boring medieval tournaments? 51 Actress Zadora 52 Unwelcome growth 53 Joking around at a medieval tournament? 60 See 58-Down 61 Noted declarer of bankruptcy in 2001 62 Olympics jump 66 W.W. II battle site 67 Accustom 68 “The occupation of the idle man, the distraction of the warrior, the peril of the sovereign,” per Napoleon

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE TL EA AP M U P S UK R M AI CS

AO C M TE AG A A TH AE RR A I

AA CB E M ET

RG OE AR RE

BL RI O G K H ET NS EA LB EE VR A TA OS RI SA

S U P ES RT O K AE N A I M S ES T TE EL

O R O R A O TD SI C A CL A H SP P

TH W E OL SE N EA L C I H SE TR I FI FN ST

H S AP SI R B O E ES A N EG E RT A LC LE O Y

AT NI K V L O ES PE D H T D AY A N TI E O S N

OI N AE I R W A TR E O S D A YF E U N D R S C

S P A E R O N A M G F M T I D N E C P R T E A SE

S N O LI O R O O P E E N L O S E D S

RI N O A T S A N T E A R R L O N D R O Y D E R

N O EJ E O D S I B N O G N E E X S E M R C CI O S Y E

R M A R N E

E T Y O E N S

A T D A A T M E R A T H P E A M R P

E S D N Y O S R E N O E O T K E S S

69 Creature known scientifically as Bufo bufo 70 Heavy reading 71 Donald and Ivana, for instance Down 1 Shoot the breeze 2 Carnival city 3 Fracas 4 Hamper 5 Actress Mazar 6 Fairly uncommon blood type, informally 7 Nonsense 8 Black mark 9 Biblical fellow who was distressed? 10 “Back to the Future” transport 11 Mine, in Marseille 12 Springsteen’s “___ Fire” 13 Told all to the cops 21 Mont. neighbor 22 Crud 23 Chow down on 24 ___ for (really delicious) 25 Ultimate object 28 Follower of many a dot 29 Some daily papers, informally 30 TV courtroom drama, 1986-94 31 Start or finish of an aphorism regarding justice

20 23

34 39

35 40

44 48

41 45

42 46

47 50

51 54

Puzzle by Karen Young Bonin

32 Patsy 36 Made less rigorous 37 Things binge drinkers sometimes do 39 Sloppy 41 Zebra 44 ___ were 46 Blue

49 Accept punishment 50 Entertain 53 Witticism 54 Anne Frank’s father 55 Kareem AbdulJabbar’s alma mater, in brief 56 ___ time at all

57 Oil container 58 French artist famous for 60Acrossing 59 Juana ___ de la Cruz, Mexican poet/nun 63 Losing row 64 Brink 65 French article

For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.49 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5554. Annual subscriptions are available for the best of Sunday crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. AT&T users: Text NYTX to 386 to download puzzles, or visit nytimes.com/mobilexword for more information. Online subscriptions: Today’s puzzle and more than 2,000 past puzzles, nytimes.com/crosswords ($39.95 a year). Share tips: nytimes.com/wordplay. Crosswords for young solvers: nytimes.com/learning/xwords.

18 YEARS OF INDEPENDENT NEWS, ARTS & EVENTS FOR WNC mountainx.com

• MARCH 28 - APRIL 3, 2012