Mountain Xpress, December 15 2010 by Mountain Xpress

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thisweek on the cover

p. 12 Rosman declassified Western North Carolina’s misty mountains have harbored many secrets, but few as closely guarded as the story of the Rosman Research Station, a remote hotbed of international espionage from 1981 to 1995. But with recently declassified documents in hand, Asheville writer (and former Xpress Managing Editor) Jon Elliston lifts the veil. Cover design by Kathy Wadham Photographs by Jonathan Welch

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County aims to spark jobs with big loan to Ingles Markets

18 Green Scene: Farm conservation Buncombe leads state in lost farmland; forum focuses on efforts to preserve it

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22 Holiday with the cashew carolers We talk to Rudolph about Christmas alone, look at the naughty and nice sides of holiday food, learn about helping Helpmate and more

arts&entertainment 62 ghosts of biltmores past A different side of that historic village

63 powerful silence

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DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Chatham County Line pairs chaos and quiet, roots and pop

64 Kickstarting a career Aaron Woody Wood makes his album with help from his friends

features 5 7 10 11 16 17 20 41 43 45 47 49 50 56 58 60 65 66 68 70 76 77 82 87

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letters A diversity of viewpoints leads to better public policy I applaud Mr. Ivey’s letter [“‘Man-Made’ Global Warming is a Man-Made Myth,” Dec. 1 Xpress], although I don’t hold his belief that global cooling [has been] going on since 1998. I would be interested [in seeing] the data he has that demonstrates this, as the data I am familiar with demonstrates increasing temperatures since 1998 (please see tinyurl.com/globaltempincrease). In addition, the human practices that have been identified as promoting global warming also have been identified with an increase in pollution of the atmosphere and other noxious environmental effects. In order to make good public policy, I believe we need people of different views to speak up, with mutual respect and with adequate scrutiny of facts. I would be happy to discuss this with others who are interested. I expect I would learn something and some of my views and beliefs might be changed. — Stephen Rinsler Arden

“Global warming is a myth” is a dangerous myth I have to say this about the global-warmingis-a-myth-crowd: They sure are spunky. Able to hold onto their conspiracy theories in the face of all evidence to the contrary — a testament to the power of selective belief to reduce cognitive dissonance. Unfortunately, neither the facts nor the

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overwhelming majority opinion supports them. The trend of annual mean temperature has continued upward throughout this decade, even allowing for the 1998 spike that was helped by the hottest El Niño on record. Four of the five hottest years on record have occurred since 2003 (1998 was No. 3), and 2010 is on track to break all previous ones. These conclusions are based on consistent, independent data gathered by a number of diverse organizations, e.g., NASA, Atmospheric Radiation Measurement, National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration and various university researchers. Not one scientific organization has disputed the findings of the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, which states that there is a greater than 90-percent probability that humans have contributed significantly to global warming. Over 50 national and international scientific organizations have publicly signed onto those conclusions, including the American Geophysical Union, which represents over 20,000 climate scientists. Among climate scientists, over 95 percent agree with the IPCC reports. About two-thirds of Americans also accept these conclusions, as

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DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

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For other Molton cartoons, check out our Web page at www.mountainx.com/cartoons do 80 percent of foreign populations. But a few vocal dissenters, propelled more by emotion than logic, continue to get air time out of proportion to their numbers or their arguments. I guess it sells newspapers. Although the measured warming effects are exceeding even the most pessimistic projections of existing climate models, it seems very unlikely that anything of consequence will be done by governments to address it in time to prevent major consequences. … But that will be just another thing for our heirs to deal with. Meanwhile, enjoy the music. — Glen Reese Asheville

Where does global-warming denial come from? Thanks to Susan Andrew for the rebuttal to Michael Ivey’s letter [“‘Man-Made Global Warming,” Dec. 1 Xpress]. The vast majority of researchers agree that the human impact on our ecosystem is undeniable. Al Gore makes a strong point: With global population pushing seven billion, there might be a billion of us daily clawing away at coal fields with gigantic shovels, stripping forests with high-tech rolling saws, denuding the hills for firewood, driving more cars and extracting

more petroleum than ever before. We are consuming electric power to run air conditioners, TVs and factories in places that previously have never seen them. How can we think this would not have an impact? … Where, then, does the vehement denial come from? Progressives need to “grok” the mindset behind this refusal. Some have absorbed American Exceptionalism into their very being. Reared in suburban, mall-cruising, upper-middle-class families, they have enjoyed living large and simply cannot fathom scaling back. Others, the “wannabe” crowd, are striving to get there. The 6,000-square-foot house with three SUVs is baseline. All us hippies (old and young) and anti-growth, Obama-voting idealists are getting in the way with our crazy talk of limits and extinction. Any criticism of our shop-til-you-drop culture is taken as heresy.

heyyou We want to hear from you. Please send your letters to: Editor, Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall Street Asheville, NC 28801 or by email to letters@mountainx.com.

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010

Fewer and fewer Americans travel to other countries to witness how more mature economies are tackling these issues. Canadians, Europeans and others are labeled as simply jealous of our “freedom” to pilot 8-mpg monster trucks 30 miles to the nearest Walmart. It’s high time to call them out on it and clear the air. — Larry Abbott Asheville

“Climategate” is the real myth Michael Ivey’s recent letter chastised one of your writers for being “behind the info-curve” on the subject of global warming [“‘Man-Made’ Global Warming,” Dec. 1 Xpress]. His evidence for this position is that the planet has supposedly been cooling since 1998 and that the “Climategate” scandal showed that anthropogenic global warming is a myth. Neither of these assertions could be more ill-informed. To begin with, choosing 1998 as a starting point is a classic cherry pick — that year was very warm due to an unusually active El Niño. The few years after this were moderate El Niña conditions, which had a cooling effect. A well-explained, short-term drop in temperature for reasons unrelated to carbon dioxide does not refute the existence of global warming, even if it did occur. Moreover, the work of Murphy, et al, in 2009 shows that, even if atmospheric temperatures had dropped after 1998, oceanic temperatures did not. Since ocean warming comprises the bulk of warming, the planet clearly continued to heat after 1998. And as if that wasn’t enough, Fawcett and Jones’ [report] showed in 2008 that the linear trend in global temperatures remained upward for the years 1998 to 2007. Mr. Ivey’s reason for why climate change is supposedly a “myth” never even actually happened! It is claimed that “Climategate” exposed global warming as a myth. Surely Mr. Ivey doesn’t mean the same Climategate in which all researchers were subsequently cleared of all accusations in not one, not two, but three different investigations? Surely he doesn’t mean the same Climategate in which [it] was found that “the honesty and rigor of the Climate Research Unit as scientists is not in doubt [and] we have not found any evidence of behavior that might undermine the conclusions of the IPCC assessments,” because that would be an awfully flimsy argument. [For more information about the reports referenced in this letter, visit the following URLs, shortened for convenience: avl.mx/15; avl.mx/16.] — Jacob Nunn Asheville

N.C. Dept. of Agriculture conducts animal welfare survey: Speak up now People who care about dogs and cats often feel helpless to stop the needless killing of thousands of adoptable animals. Here is a chance to make a difference. The North Carolina Department of Agriculture and Consumer Services has been authorized by the General Assembly to conduct a study of companion animal issues. The study will focus on laws and regulations regarding cats and dogs, oversight of public and private animal shelters, the state’s spay/neuter program, puppy

DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

mills and consumer protection for people buying sick animals. The study will also focus on ways to reduce the number of animals killed in our shelters. The N.C. Dept. of Health’s 2008 figures show that over 200,000 unwanted animals were killed in shelters (only two-thirds of counties reporting), at a cost of $30 million (sheltering only, not animal control). The N.C. Dept. of Agriculture is looking to the public for ideas to improve the lives of dogs and cats. If you want to make suggestions on issues such as strengthening animal-cruelty laws, licensing and regulating puppy mills, spay/neuter funding, banning the gas chamber, animal hoarding, banning chaining, requiring identification on animals, requiring shelters to spay/neuter before adoption — or any ideas that would further animal welfare — send your comments to animalwelfarestudy@ncagr.gov. Be specific in your suggestions, such as [proposing] a minimal tax on pet food to fund the state’s spay/neuter program. There isn’t an official deadline for comments, but the results will be presented to the General Assembly early next year. Time is of the essence. — Terri David Asheville

Congress must focus on improving our transportation infrastructure. We must stop asking whether or not we can afford to invest in America’s infrastructure and ask ourselves how we can afford not to. — Jesse R. Jacobson American Society of Civil Engineers Asheville

Facilitate fitness at the Pack Library I feel for Saul Chase and the individuals who are not able to open doors on their own at the Pack Library [“Bring Back the Automatic Doors,” Dec. 1 Xpress]. I agree 100 percent that there needs to be assistance [for the disabled] to enter the library, but the automatic door is not the best option.

In an informal study of the automatic-door use at Pack Library, I personally have never seen someone who actually needed it use the automatic door! As a health educator, I would often sit there and watch as 99 percent of able-bodied people used the automatic door. According to the N.C. Health Info website, three out of five of my friends in North Carolina are either overweight or obese. I think we could forego the automatic door to encourage more movement in North Carolinians’ everyday life. Pushing or pulling a door open isn’t going to cure obesity, but I feel we are enabling people to make unhealthy/lazy choices in their daily life. America is great; we have cars. Cars are glorified in America, but at what cost? Our health? Our weight?

My solution? A doorbell. When a person comes to the door [who] cannot physically open it (what the automatic door was intended for), they ring the doorbell. Then the security officer at the library or maybe a library attendant comes and opens the door. This would implement movement in the library employees’ day and empower people who can open doors to do so, all while meeting the needs of our citizens. If people are moving large boxes in and out of the library, we could use a small door wedge. If it’s only one trip, then the doorbell could be utilized again. Not only would we be facilitating a little bit of fitness, but also chivalry, kindness and interaction with our fellow Ashevilleans. — Mark Strazzer Asheville

God bless the farmers Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn what the World Bank environmental advisors say — or think, for that matter. I would speculate that, before the 16th century, there were more buffalo in America than there are cattle now. I would even go further to speculate that there were many more wild animal farts then. The land we have cut off from the animals is the issue I would hope people from Western North Carolina are concerned with. I read about a man once who took pleasure in feeding people a meal consisting of bread and fish. I read of another man who found water and a glorious bounty of fowl after walking his people out of a land of servitude. — William Henry Roberts Swannanoa

Public infrastructure: Buy now or pay later Last week, the National Commission on Fiscal Responsibility and Reform issued a report providing recommendations for reducing the federal deficit. One of the proposals from this report was a recommendation to adjust the gas tax. No one likes to see an increase in user fees, but consider the following. According to the American Society of Civil Engineers’ 2009 Report Card for America’s Infrastructure, the nation’s roads, drinking-water systems and other public works rank a barely passing grade of “D” and require a $2.2 trillion, five-year investment. At the current rate of population growth, it is expected that North Carolina will be the eighth most populous state in the country by 2015. As North Carolina continues to grow, so will the demand on public infrastructure. The gas tax has not been adjusted since 1993, losing one-third of its purchasing power over the last 17 years. Meanwhile, maintenance and new construction demands have greatly increased.

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010

10 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

commentary Kituwah calling

A head-on collision with the past by Tom Trigo In my recent travels through Western North Carolina while scouting locations for a movie, I happened to be heading northbound on Route 19 out of Bryson City at the crack of dawn. It was an off-day for me, and I wanted to explore the eastern slopes and hollows of the Smokies around the town of Cherokee and maybe hike a bit. As I came around a curve in the road, I immediately sensed something special about the flat valley to my right, bordered sharply by steep ridges on all sides. This is no exaggeration or silly wordplay: I felt it as strongly as if someone had intentionally led me to this place to point out its beauty and uniqueness. Without knowing anything about the dew-covered fields before me, I photographed a decaying roadside farmstead now overgrown with weeds and vines and marked with Cherokee Reservation boundary signs. Continuing on my way, I pulled over upon spotting a historical marker that jutted prominently from the shoulder of the road. Most such markers are placed at eye level for easy reading,

For an instant I glimpsed this sacred bottomland as it perhaps looked for thousands of years. but this one was twice the normal height, and to read it, you hand to stand almost in supplication with your head tilted back, looking up toward the sky. I stood in awe as I realized where I was: “Kituwah. Cherokee mother town. Council house stood on mound here. Town was destroyed in 1776 by Rutherford expedition.” A painfully brief overview for a piece of ground that had enormous importance for the Cherokee people. The sun’s first rays were now slicing across the ridge while the valley floor remained in shadow. There was little traffic on the road, and for a few brief moments I stood and gazed eastward in silence. A small flock of songbirds alighted from some shrubs hundreds of yards away before quickly disappearing into bare, distant treetops. Many images flowed through my mind as I mentally removed the railroad track, the barns, some fences, a power line, several pieces of farm machinery arranged in a row out in the open, a few modern homes behind me with their asphalt driveways, metal awnings, tarped lawnmowers

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Sacred ground: Duke Energy has agreed to move its proposed substation to a site that’s not within view of this property, which is owned by the Eastern Band of Cherokee. photo by tom trigo

and assorted vehicles. And finally, as was only fitting, I removed myself, my car and the highway that had brought me here. For an instant I glimpsed this sacred bottomland as it perhaps looked for thousands of years. The clouds were now become aromatic streamers of wood smoke, mainly chestnut but also oak, hickory and perhaps other hardwoods, rising from domelike lodges and earthen structures built low to the ground in a circular pattern. Children could be heard laughing, maybe heckling a playmate or just getting rowdy. Meanwhile, dark adult figures moved about, perhaps beginning preparations for the Green Corn Ceremony, when debts and other minor offenses were forgiven, or for some other ceremony now long forgotten. Then again, the village may simply have been going about the mundane tasks of daily life in this sheltered valley, far from hostile neighbors. It was only later that I researched Kituwah and learned about its ancient past and profound significance for the Cherokee. Regrettably, I also read up on the recent controversy with Duke Energy, which had planned to build an electrical substation within this sacred landscape, generating considerable opposition both among the Cherokee and Swain county officials. In August, Duke agreed to move the project to an alternate location, but the original site has already been bulldozed, and at this writing it’s unclear what will be done to restore it. My own selfish preference would be the Teddy Roosevelt approach: “Leave it as it is. You cannot improve on it. The ages have been at work on it, and man can only mar it.” A good start would be removing all the infrastructure (as I did in my mind’s eye).

At the same time, I confess that the next time I flip a switch in my Virginia home, or need some clothes washed, or want to watch a football game on my wide-screen TV, I’ll be reminded that such modern luxuries don’t just magically appear. Most have their origin in countless blighted landscapes where mountaintops are leveled, minerals extracted and voltage moved. As long as I’m “on the grid,” I suppose I don’t have a leg to stand on when it comes to complaining about power companies. But this internal conflict in no way diminishes the reverence that came over me on that calm but cold November morning. Nor does it downplay the importance of protecting special places of great historical and religious significance. As a political cartoon on the Save Kituwah website pointedly notes, most Americans would be outraged if a power plant, dam or factory were going to be built beside Mount Rushmore, atop Ground Zero, on Liberty Island in the shadow of Lady Liberty, in the wheat field beneath Little Round Top (where many a North Carolinian shed his blood and drew his last breath), or directly across the Potomac from George Washington’s bucolic Mount Vernon. This glaring cultural double standard helped create the totally avoidable Kituwah controversy. After 234 years, it appears that the Rutherford expedition is still on the march. X

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Charlottesville, Va., resident Tom Trigo is a freelance location manager and actor who’s worked on a number of projects filmed in Western North Carolina, including Hannibal, My Fellow Americans and Alone Yet Not Alone.

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 11

news Out of the shadows

Declassified documents shed light on WNC spy base by Jon Elliston “What can one say when a good thing comes to an end? Just that it was good while it lasted.” Lines from a plaintive autobiography or sappy romance novel? Nope: These poignant words, culled from an official government document, are part of a loving farewell to a local spy base. According to a once highly classified 1996 National Security Agency report, the “good thing” was the Rosman Research Station, which eavesdropped on enemy communications for nearly 15 years. So secret are the NSA’s ways that it’s often dubbed “No Such Agency.” But while most of what transpired at this idyllic hideaway in the Pisgah National Forest remains shrouded in a thick security blanket, declassified documents have revealed that it ranked among the agency’s most prized possessions.

Closing a spy base required a lot more than simply turning off the lights on the way out.

“A prime nuclear target”

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Western North Carolina’s misty mountains have harbored many secrets, but few as closely guarded as the story of the Rosman Research Station, a remote hotbed of international espionage from 1981 to 1995 (see “Land of the Sky Spies,” June 9, 2004 Xpress). Shielded by surveillance systems and multiple layers of security, this mysterious outpost occupied a mostly forested, 355 acre tract just north of the tiny town of Rosman, near Brevard. In such a setting, it inevitably became a topic of both local and international speculation. The Defense Department claimed to run the facility but wouldn’t say much about it. “It’s a vital part of the overall security of this country,” a Pentagon spokesperson told The Transylvania Times in 1986, declining further comment. (Whatever was going on at the base, the newspaper speculated, its presence meant that “Transylvania County may well be a prime nuclear target for the Soviet Union.”) Things weren’t always so hush-hush at the Rosman station, established by the National Aeronautics and Space Administration in 1963 to help propel the nation’s space program.

12 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Sky spies: At this former NASA facility in Pisgah National Forest, the National Security Agency ran a classified “signals intelligence” operation from 1981 to 1995. Today, the site is home to the nonprofit Pisgah Astronomical Research Institute, which invites volunteers and visitors to explore such formerly top-secret features as an underground tunnel system. above photo courtesy of pari below photo by jonathan welch

NASA touted the millions of dollars’ worth of radio telescopes, radomes and other high-tech equipment at the site, which it used to track and communicate with spacecraft circling the Earth and hurtling to the moon and back. But by 1980, with other facilities in place that could serve it better, the space agency shut down the operation. A year later, under Defense Department cover, the NSA’s high-tech spies moved in. These super snoops were (and still

are) tasked with making and breaking codes as well as transmitting and capturing secret international communications. According to investigative news reports and occasional academic studies over the years, the NSA used Rosman Research Station to train its electronic ears on Soviet satellite communications and other Cold War targets. The agency was always tight-lipped about its WNC base, but a small batch of declassified documents now

“The work at Rosman, even the number of employees, was a closely guarded secret.”

xpressfile

— 1996 report from the Center for Cryptologic History

provides at least a teasing glimpse of what went on there.

Incomplete clues

Ironically, it was one of the NSA’s own sworn-to-secrecy employees — a man named Eugene Meador — who filed the Freedom of Information Act request that prompted the release of these papers. Previous FOIA requests about the base had been deemed too broad to fulfill, other NSA documents suggest, but Meador’s was nice and tight. In November of 2006, he asked for “2-5 official documents associating the NSA and the Rosman, N.C. site. Something official that would confirm that the agency was the actual owner/tenant of the site and that SIGINT [signals intelligence] was performed at that location.” It took the NSA nearly a year to comply with the request. (Other documents indicate an internal debate about whether the operation still “requires protection,” noting that, at some unspecified point, the agency’s presence at Rosman had ceased to be a secret.) Eventually, Meador got most of what he asked for, as a few highly classified documents were released to him. And though whole paragraphs were whited out, the declassified material confirmed the gist of the NSA’s role in Rosman while conveying a sense of just how tricky it was for the agency to maintain its veil of secrecy while shutting down the operation. The release of the documents went mostly unnoticed: Despite news-database and Web searches, Xpress has found no reference to them except on GovernmentAttic, a website run by a group of volunteers who maintain an extensive online archive dedicated to promoting transparency in government operations. And there these materials have languished until now. The group says it’s had no contact with Meador and that it obtained the Rosman-related records through its own subsequent FOIA request. The documents — the first official acknowledgement that the NSA was even present in Rosman — offer tantalizing but incomplete clues concerning what the agency was up to there. An August 1996 report by the agency’s Center for Cryptologic History, for example, was titled “Rosman Tracks on to the End” and stamped TOP SECRET UMBRA. “The site recently closed its doors,” the report said, adding that “The work at Rosman, even the number of employees, was a closely guarded secret.” Those employees included “contractors from [defense firms] Bendix, Raytheon and Allied Signal Inc., along with National Security Agency civilians.”

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Now we know: A batch of declassified NSA records finally documents the agency’s tenure in Rosman. Above, a page from an internal agency newsletter details steps taken to close the base. To read all of the documents, visit www.mountainx.com/xpressfiles/nsa. In a still-cryptic passage, the NSA noted that “In spite of adversity, significant notoriety came to [Rosman Research Station].” But what kind of adversity? And why the notoriety? There’s no telling: The next two paragraphs are still classified.

A disposal problem

The NSA’s “good thing” at Rosman ended shortly after the Cold War. “Budget cuts and the removal of the station’s primary function forced the Agency to cease operations,” the 1996 report explained. Of course, closing a spy base required a lot more than simply turning off the lights on the way out. Rosman Research Station had grown to the “the size of a small industrial park,” the NSA noted, making it a pretty big secret to sweep under the rug. An unclassified but little-noticed environmental assessment, produced by the Defense

Department in January 1995, sized up the base’s secret infrastructure, hinting at the maze of both above- and below-ground gear that would have to find a home as the NSA moved out. On the surface were a battery of electronic ears and eyes, more than 30 buildings, a wastewatertreatment plant, a firing range and a helipad. Below ground, there were tunnels stretching hundreds of feet and roughly 50,000 gallons of fuel in several storage tanks. “Before the site’s last mission was shut down in November 1994, word of the closure was revealed by the local press,” prompting various organizations to ask for the base’s leftovers, according to an April 1995 NSA newsletter stamped FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY. “For example, one group investigated the possible use of the site, intact with all of the equipment, to use as an uplink to the information superhighway; another saw possibilities for turning it

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into a tech school for computer/communication skills; and Transylvania County asked for the fire truck.” “This closure was the first [post-Cold War-era shutdown] involving an ‘NSA-owned’ facility,” the document noted. That presented some new challenges, which were met, in part, by discreetly distributing much of the base’s equipment. In this, the NSA followed guidelines established by the Defense Department, which had more experience in decommissioning bases. “Most of the other operational and administrative equipment was excessed to other SIGINT facilities,” though some less strategic but still useful resources did benefit the immediate civilian community, the NSA noted. “The local school systems received some of the old personal computers and the fire truck did end up in the local fire house.” In a final gesture, the agency left behind a hearty helping of its former secrets — but only after rendering them indecipherable. The station “made a very significant effort to recycle waste paper,” the report stated. “So far, over 7,500 pounds of shredded paper have been donated to Transylvania County for recycling as opposed to clogging the local landfill.”

Into the light

Today, the former cloak-and-dagger outpost is out in the open, having narrowly dodged destruction. As the NSA mothballed the base, it “planned for the worst case scenario where the Agency might be required to demolish the infrastructure and restore the property to pristine forest,” one of the declassified documents reveals. After a few years in limbo under U.S. Forest Service oversight, the site was acquired by Greensboro businessman and science aficionado Donald Cline in 1999; he gave it new life as the Pisgah Astronomical Research Institute. The nonprofit center has since become a jewel in the crown of North Carolina science education, hosting thousands of students from kindergarten to postgraduate level. In partnership with assorted universities and top astronomers worldwide, PARI has become home to an everexpanding roster of decidedly public studies and experiments. The dozen or so staffers rely on hundreds of volunteer “Friends of PARI” to keep all the programs running. Each Wednesday, the group’s docents lead free walking tours.

14 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Eyes on the skies: Two 85-foot-diameter radio telescopes hint at the research center’s spysatellite past. Xpress file photo by Jon elliston

“We’ve turned this into an astronomy lab that almost anyone can make use of, in one way or another,” retired engineer John Boehme boasted during a recent tour. “I’ll take you anywhere you want to go,” he offered — escorting us through underground tunnels and other places that would formerly have required a high-level security clearance. And though the NSA’s stint in Rosman doesn’t figure in the picture much anymore, it can still prove a touchy topic. The history page on PARI’s website, for example, details NASA’s groundbreaking work but makes no mention of the subsequent tenant, merely repeating the government’s cover story: “In 1981, the Rosman Reseach Station was transferred to the Department of Defense and used for satellite data collection. ... In 1995, the facility was closed and DOD operations were consolidated elsewhere.” Dave Clavier, PARI’s vice president of administration and development, says the institute isn’t trying to hide the site’s covert history — it’s just that the staff aren’t privy to the details. “When the NSA was here, the site was ‘dark,’

so I literally don’t know what they were doing,” he explains. “Most of the people who were here had security clearances. I’ve been here six years, and I can’t get anybody to tell me what was really going on. We know they were here, but that’s about it.” Meanwhile, the legacy of the NSA’s operations continues to skew some perceptions of PARI, Clavier notes. “There are still quite a few people who, because of what was here during that time, are confused and think that they can’t come here or aren’t allowed to. It’s not atypical for people who come by for tours to ask if it’s OK for them to take pictures here. We say, ‘Of course: You can take pictures of anything you want.’ “If you were trying to create some interesting mountain folklore,” he adds with a chuckle, “I don’t think you could do anything better than go out in the middle of the national forest, put all this gear here, and then tell people that it doesn’t exist and you can’t come in.” To learn more about PARI, visit www.pari.edu. X Asheville-based writer Jon Elliston can be reached at jonelliston@gmail.com.

news X Buncombe County

It’s the economy, stupid? Commissioners take steps to create jobs Dec. 7 meeting

aStimulus loan may fund Ingles improvements aRevamped EDC aims to ramp up local economy by Jake Frankel At their final meeting before breaking for the holidays, the Buncombe County commissioners took action on several fronts with an eye toward boosting the local economy. Topping the Dec. 7 agenda was approving a $99.74 million federal stimulus loan to Ingles Markets Inc. If the state signs off on the complex deal, the locally based grocery chain would use the money to build an 830,000square-foot warehouse and distribution center at its Black Mountain headquarters and an 80,000- to 100,000-square-foot grocery store at 153 Smokey Park Highway in Asheville. Chief Financial Officer Ronald Freeman estimated that the completed projects would create at least 190 new full-time jobs, plus an unspecified number of temporary construction jobs. “We’re a strong believer in trading locally,

“We’re a strong believer in trading locally, given that we have 39 stores and 3,200 employees in Buncombe County.” — Ronald Freeman, Ingles Markets

given that we have 39 stores and 3,200 employees in Buncombe County, so we’d like to add to that,” he said. The commissioners hailed the prospect of new jobs, emphasizing that the money in question wouldn’t be coming out of state or county coffers but from low-interest federal Recovery Zone Facility Bonds. “This stimulus money is a federal decision; it’s not county or state money. But it’s about jobs. To get this kind of loan, you have to show ... that you are stimulating our economy under federal guidelines, which is not an easy thing to do,” board Chair David Gantt explained. “We need the jobs. … We all have to work together on jobs. We understand; we get it.” Commissioner Holly Jones also noted the positive impact the expansions will have on the local tax base. “That’s a good little piece of news for us,” she said, joining her colleagues in supporting the measure. Although the loan still needs final approval by the state, Freeman seemed to think the

Ingles advantage? The board approved a $99.74 million federal stimulus loan to help Ingles build a new 830,000-square-foot distribution center at its Black Mountain headquarters and a new grocery store on the Smokey Park Highway, creating an estimated 190 jobs. photo by Jonathan Welch

projects were on track. “We hope to have [the distribution] facility up and running by the end of 2012,” he reported. Ingles operates 202 stores throughout the Southeast, and its fourth-quarter profits jumped up 63 percent, according to the company’s Nov. 30 financial report.

hearing, Day explained that most of the surrounding land is already zoned commercial. “I don’t think anyone would want to buy a house on that property,” he observed. Both the county Planning Board and Planning staff had recommended approving the request.

Economic Development Coalition to Other business Bill Stanley was unanimously re-elected by tackle tough issues his fellow commissioners to a third one-year Employment remained front and center as the commissioners unanimously agreed to revamp the Economic Development Coalition of Asheville-Buncombe County, a joint effort with the city of Asheville, the Asheville Area Chamber of Commerce and other groups. The retooled organization is charged with “stimulating private-sector investment, economic growth and job creation” and determining the “10 most important challenges to economic growth” in the area. “Jobs will really be the focal point,” said Commissioner K. Ray Bailey, who will continue to chair the coalition. The 16 remaining members will be appointed by a wide variety of local groups, including the Board of Commissioners, the Asheville City Council, the Chamber, the Asheville Regional Airport Authority and the Manufacturers Executive Association.

Leicester parcel rezoned

In a smaller skirmish on Buncombe’s tough economic battlefield, the commissioners unanimously approved a rezoning request for a 1.39 acre parcel at 872 New Leicester Highway. Landowner David Day said he’d requested the change from residential to commercial zoning because he has a “potential contract with a retailer.” The only resident to speak during the public

term as the board’s vice chair. Although the position is largely symbolic, Stanley will wield the gavel when Gantt is absent. “Thank you for substituting and doing a great job for us as vice chair,” said Gantt as he cast his vote. Later in the meeting, the commissioners also designated Stanley to represent them at the N.C. Association of County Commissioners’ upcoming Legislative Goals Conference in Durham. In addition, the commissioners unanimously appointed Joe Brumit to the A-B Tech board of trustees and Linda Brown to the Board of Trustees for Abandoned Cemeteries. Citing ongoing vacancies on the Asheville Transit Commission as well as the Civic Center and Historic Resources commissions, Gantt urged the public to get involved. “These are important groups,” he asserted, adding, “Each one of them has an interesting and eventful future next year.” To learn more about serving on public boards and commissions, or to apply for a specific position, contact Clerk to the Board Kathy Hughes at 828-2504105 or at kathy.hughes@buncombecounty.org. X Jake Frankel can be reached at 251-1333, ext. 115, or at jfrankel@mountainx.com.

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 15

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End-of-year lists from the blogoshere; cold and snow from the atmosphere The end-of-year lists and reflections have begun. Asheville Citizen-Times staffer (and former Xpress multimedia editor) Jason Sandford has been posting an entertaining series of lists on his popular Ashvegas blog. In the “Big Asheville Media Moves” category, he celebrated the return of television anchor and reporter Frank Kracher to WLOS. After a five-year absence from the local airwaves, during which he worked for an ABC affiliate in Syracuse, N.Y., Kracher moved back to Asheville about two years ago and got re-hired by WLOS in June, according to Sandford. “Kracher and WLOS probably reach more people with their news than any other outlet in town, so this was a big move,” Sandford explained. “It’s great to see Kracher talking to me on the TV box again.” Sandford also reviewed staffing changes at a number of other local outlets, including WCQS (Jody Evans took over as executive director in July), WNC Magazine (Rita Larkin took over for Eric Seeger as managing editor) and Xpress (former reporter Michael Muller, Sandford declared, established himself as “one of the most unique, controversial and compelling media figures in Asheville” during his six-month stint at the paper). Local Edge Radio hosts Blake Butler and Lesley Groetsch also got a well-deserved shout-out for recently guest-hosting liberal talk-radio host Norman Goldman’s nationally syndicated show. They were heard in more than 30 markets around the U.S., and plans are in the works for the Local Edge hosts to fill in for Goldman again, they told Xpress. Also making waves in the local blogosphere were posts by Asheville City Council members Gordon Smith and Cecil Bothwell in which they reflected on their first year in office. In the Scrutiny Hooligans post “One Year In — The Wins,” Smith highlighted actions he says he took to fulfill his campaign promises. He called the Oct. 12 approval of a sustainability-bonus ordinance “the most important thing we accomplished all year,” arguing that it will help “reduce development battles, increase the stock of affordable housing and increase sustainable-building practices on our transit corridors.” In “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly: A Year on Council,” Bothwell also cited the sustainability bonus, listing it as one of the two hardest votes he cast all year (the other concerned annexation). The ordinance, wrote Bothwell, “pitted my overall green agenda against my insistence on transparency and accountability in government.” In the end, Bothwell said he decided to vote for it because, in his mind, “Increasing density along transit routes and incentivizing green projects won out over the public-input argument.” Both Council members also confessed that serving on Council is proving to be a big challenge. “It’s been a learning curve like no other in my life,” Smith revealed. Bothwell, meanwhile, called his first year in office “educational, surprising, torturous and fun.” “Perhaps the hardest lesson has been the discovery that, when push comes to shove and a vote must be cast up or down, two strongly held beliefs can be in direct conflict,” he continued.

Let it snow?

In other news, unusually cold and snowy weather continued in WNC this week. Temperatures in Asheville have been hovering far below normal, and the higher elevations northwest of downtown received sizable amounts of early-

16 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Snow lovers unite: The cold, snowy weather has been good news for skiers and snowboarders. Western North Carolina resorts are open and reporting great early season conditions. photo by Jake Frankel

season snow. It’s made for a great start to the local ski season, with all five of North Carolina’s biggest resorts now open and reporting great conditions for this time of year, according to SkiNC. And in the cover story “Road Crews Ready for Winter,” the Smoky Mountain News highlighted how “The region is tentatively gearing up for another season of icy assault.” According to the article, the N.C. Department of Transportation is expanding its snow-and-ice-removal operations, and some school systems have added options to their bad-weather-response plans. For example, Haywood County added a three-hour-delay schedule option to the existing two-hour-delay and full-day-closure options. Other counties in the region may follow the example of Jackson and Macon counties by splitting themselves into districts more in sync with the local topography. That would allow students who are “truly affected by weather to stay safe and stay home, while those at lower altitudes who may see nary a flake on the ground can enjoy a normal school day,” the article reported. — by Jake Frankel

themap On Dec. 6, the trial date for the “Asheville ” — those arrested for a May 1 vandalism spree in downtown Asheville — was set for Jan. . Yet to be decided: Will they be tried separately or as a group?

weekly news bits

The Asheville Police Department recently announced that it will step up patrols along Merrimon Avenue in north Asheville. Over the last three months, there have been 16 crimes reported at businesses located along the road.

Local “paranormal investigator” Joshua P. Warren opened a new downtown Asheville Tourism Center & Free Museum that he says “features our city’s most unusual and extreme history.” VANCE MONUMENT

On Tuesday, Dec. 7, Asheville tied a 977 record when the “high” temperature of the day hit a mere 6 degrees. That same day, several units in the Turtle Creek apartment complex caught on fire and people lost their homes. The fire broke out due to unattended cooking, according to the Asheville Fire Department.

To celebrate the installation of 1,200 feet of new sidewalk along Tunnel Road between the Groce United Methodist Church and the east Asheville library, Asheville City officials held a groundbreaking ceremony on Dec. 9. Haw Creek Community Association President Chris Pelly said the improvements were a great start but explained that the neighborhood needs seven to eight more miles of sidewalk to ensure residents’ safety.

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At the height of Buncombe Countyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s housing boom, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Development was so popular in this area, people were buying land sight unseen or just with a flyover,â&#x20AC;? notes Valerie True of Blue Ridge Forever. The resulting loss of farmland â&#x20AC;&#x201D; 125,000 acres across Western North Carolina between 2002 and 2007, according to figures compiled by her group â&#x20AC;&#x201D; sparked its formation in 2004. And while the subsequent economic crunch has slowed the pace of development, she concedes, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also sharply curtailed the funds available for land conservation. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We get calls every day from people wanting to protect their farms, yet thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s less resources to work with.â&#x20AC;? Blue Ridge Forever is a coalition of 13 local, state and national conservation organizations working to protect land and water resources in the region. Meanwhile, the graying of the regionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s farmers (whose average age is 58, according to Blue Ridge Forever) threatens to trigger yet another wave of farmland conversion. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Their land is their retirement plan, so they canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just say, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;No, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not going to sell it to a

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environmental news

Farm aid: Conservation advocates are looking for new ways to preserve local farms such as this one at Warren Wilson College in Swannanoa. photo by Jonathan Welch

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Even if a farmer donates their easement outright, it could still cost $20,000 in legal fees, surveys, etc. to close on that project.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201D; Valerie True, Blue Ridge Forever

developer for millions of dollars. Instead, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m going to put this conservation easement on it and reduce the value of my land.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; They need a little compensation to do it,â&#x20AC;? True explains. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Even if a farmer donates their easement outright, it could still cost $20,000 in legal fees, surveys, etc. to close on that project.â&#x20AC;? Against this backdrop, some 175 advocates gathered at A-B Tech Nov. 30 for the WNC Farmland Access and Preservation Forum, which Trueâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s group helped organize. The message that emerged from the full day of speakers, meetings and brainstorming sessions was that preserving farmland is essential because of its vital economic, cultural and environmental impacts. â&#x20AC;&#x153;There are a lot of folks working through

18 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 â&#x20AC;˘ mountainx.com

different avenues to protect farmland and keep farming going in WNC,â&#x20AC;? True points out. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This was a good opportunity for all those folks to come together and see if thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s some opportunities to help each other out.â&#x20AC;? To rally more support for land preservation, proponents need to focus on the economic benefits of farming, argued keynote speaker Bob Wagner of the American Farmland Trust. In 2009 alone, he noted, WNCâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s roughly 13,000 working farms generated $900 million; in 2007, they accounted for about 33,000 jobs. But while Phyllis Stiles of the Conservation Trust for North Carolina hailed Buncombe County governmentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s efforts as â&#x20AC;&#x153;the envy of other counties in WNC in terms of farmland preservation,â&#x20AC;? Buncombe nonetheless led the list with 22,847 acres lost, the Blue Ridge Forever study found.

No magic bullet

During her opening remarks at the forum, Buncombe County Commissioner Holly Jones touted her boardâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ongoing initiatives while acknowledging the considerable obstacles that remain. In a later interview, she echoed those sentiments, asserting, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re ahead of the curve in the state.â&#x20AC;? The commissioners, noted Jones, have helped fund easements, covered closing costs, designated agricultural districts and supported marketing efforts for locally grown food. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Our board is very committed to doing what

we can do going forward. â&#x20AC;Ś But thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no magic bullet. â&#x20AC;Ś Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not like all our farmland loss will go away: Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got to keep on working on it,â&#x20AC;? she stressed, acknowledging that finding funding in next yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s budget will be particularly tough. â&#x20AC;&#x153;If weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got to be a big financial player in the easements ... thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going to be super, super challenging, because we have no idea how the state budget is going to impact the county,â&#x20AC;? Jones explained. State Rep. Susan Fisher of Buncombe County, who also attended the forum, predicts that the looming budget deficit together with the Republican majority in the General Assembly doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t bode well for financing conservation programs. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think in terms of anything that costs money, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not going to see a whole lot of anything happen in the next little bit, because weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got such a deficit to deal with,â&#x20AC;? she observes. But Fisher also stresses her own ongoing commitment to supporting local farmers. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been a proponent of ... incentives [that] would benefit the small organic farmers in our mountain counties,â&#x20AC;? she notes. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Small farmers are small businesses too, and weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been talking about how small businesses are going to get us out of this recession.â&#x20AC;?

Private funding sought

State trust funds designed to help cover the costs of conservation easements have already been slashed by half in recent years, True points

ecocalendar Calendar for December 15 - 23, 2010 Asheville Green Drinks A networking party that is part of the self-organizing global grassroots movement to connect communities with environmental ideas, media and action. Meets to discuss pressing green issues at Craggie Brewing Co., 197 Hilliard Ave. Info: www.ashevillegreendrinks.com. • WEDNESDAYS, 5-7pm - Program with guest speakers. Firestorm Cafe & Books Located at 48 Commerce St., Asheville. Info: 255-8115 or www.firestormcafe.com.

out; further drastic reductions would be hard to take. Meanwhile, she notes, between 1982 and 2007, North Carolina ranked fifth nationwide with 766,000 acres of farmland lost, according to her group’s study. “We’re very lucky we’re one of the few states in the Southeast that has those state trust funds, but of course those are getting severely cut,” she says. “Two of those trust funds rely on real estate closings to fund them — the Parks and Recreation Trust Fund and the Natural Heritage Trust Fund — and since those are down, the funds are down as well.” To help make up for the shortfall, the Conservation Trust for North Carolina is establishing the Western North Carolina Farmland Preservation Fund. Building on a $25,000 seed gift the group recently received from an anonymous donor, the group is aiming to raise $100,000 before sending out a request for proposals. Stiles says they’re working on several creative fundraising strategies, including asking local businesses to consider adding a voluntary surcharge on transactions. “If enough retailers would do that — you and I won’t miss it if they add a penny or two to our bill when we eat out — but with all the thousands of people in the area going out, it really starts to add up to something,” she explains. Meanwhile, local trends mirror the national picture, Wagner emphasized in his keynote speech. Between 1982 and 2007, 23 million acres of U.S. farmland were lost to development. Nonetheless, agriculture remains the nation’s dominant land use, with 922 million acres in production as of 2007, he said.

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A taxing situation

Wagner and other forum speakers also stressed the need to educate local governments about how land preservation impacts tax revenues. Studies, he reported, have shown that on average, farmland contributes more to the tax base than residential developments, when the cost of new services and infrastructure is factored in. Stiles echoed that point, observing, “There’s a myth out there that if you approve a new subdivision outside of town where we have a farm right now, the property taxes are going to roll in and it’s going to solve our municipal or county debt problem. Not so,” she asserted. “They’re going to require new services: police, fire, water, all of those things. So it’s a net loss to the community in terms of property taxes.” Clearing up that misunderstanding could help “leverage dollars and political support,” Wagner agreed. He also specifically praised this area’s growing support for small organic farms, saying the marketing efforts of groups such as the Appalachian Sustainable Agriculture Project rank among the best in the nation. “The local-food movement has exploded; it’s a niche market that holds a lot of opportunities for this area,” he declared, adding, “This is a rising tide that will lift all boats.” Jones concurred, noting, “It helps a lot to have a community that cares so deeply about this. Those ‘local food’ bumper stickers are everywhere: It’s awesome. ... We’re fortunate that we have a lot of partners moving forward.” X Jake Frankel can be reached at 251-1333, ext. 115, or at jfrankel@mountainx.com.

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Sustainable Christmas trees in WNC by John Piper Watters

Mention sustainable Christmas trees in Western North Carolina and those who know about the industry will tell you, talk to Curtis Buchanan. He’s a pioneer of progressive thinking, a visionary with activist instincts, a skilled chair-maker and a steward of forests both near and far. He’s a man who sees the results of the decisions he makes today well into the future — in short, a man who embodies the idea of sustainability. Buchanan and his father have been growing Christmas trees on Roan Mountain for more than 30 years, on land that his grandfather farmed, and his father before him, and his father before him. For the past 15 years, his Fraser firs have been USDA-certified organic. He was the first certified organic grower of Fraser-fir trees in the nation. This year, he says, his phone rings two or three times as often as in previous years. “Finally people are catching on that there is a relationship between these trees and the health of soil, and our health,” Buchanan says. “We are the health of the ecosystem.” Buchanan says his intent has always been to cultivate an organic tree that would compete with traditionally grown trees in size, shape and quality. Even an environmentally conscious consumer wouldn’t pay more, or even the same price, for a tree that looked inferior to traditionally grown trees, he reasons. He has mostly succeeded in this aim, harvesting about 4,000 trees per year. Trees that aren’t up to snuff — his “seconds,” as he likes to call them — are donated to Warren Wilson College. The college’s forestry students then sell the trees at the French Broad Food Co-op in downtown Asheville as a fundraising effort. This year’s proceeds will help sponsor the students’ travel expenses and attendance at the Appalachian Society of

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’Tis the season: Hannah Billian, a forestry major at Warren Wilson College, sells Christmas trees outside the French Broad Food Coop in downtown Asheville. Photo by John P. Watters

American Foresters conference in Charleston, S.C. early next year. Though local and regional forestry issues have always been important to Buchanan, his advocacy and activism reaches far beyond the mountains of WNC. In 1993, with the help of Brian Boggs (another WNC artisan who specializes in handmade chairs) and author Scott Landis (of Woodworkers Alliance for Rainforest Protection), he launched Green Wood/Madera Verde, a community-based sustainable forestry initiative in Latin America. According to the group’s website, its mission is to “increase the value of the forest to its inhabitants through appropriate woodworking technology. As a result, residents of forest communities are able to earn more through forest management than they would from conventional agriculture or destructive logging.” Despite his relative success in our neck of the woods, and a thriving market for organic Christmas trees, Buchanan is transitioning out of farming. The irony is that it’s just not sustainable for him to continue farming the way he’s done for the past three decades. He lives an hour away from Roan Mountain where he grows his trees; his father, who does most of the shearing, mowing and fertilizing, is almost 90 years old; and Buchanan wants to devote more of his energy to his full-time job: crafting Windsor chairs, a style that has been around for more than 300 years. His workshop, where he also teaches individual classes on furniture construction, is a 16-by-20-foot timber-framed structure in his backyard. Even walking, the

commute is much shorter than the drive to Roan Mountain. In addition to having more time to work in his studio, Buchanan, who helped to establish the local farmers market in his community, plans on spending more time in his garden, increasing his lettuce yield to sell at the market. Even though he has much to look forward to once his trees have all been harvested in a couple of years, retirement for this Christmastree farmer comes at a price. Asked what he will miss about not growing trees, Buchanan names delivering the trees to the individual homes of people in his community. Mostly, however, he says he’ll miss working the land that his father and grandfathers worked for generations before him. “I’ll miss knowing I’m seeing the same view as they saw — the same creeks, the setting sun lighting up the same mountains as they saw,” Buchanan says. With any luck, those memories will sustain him as well as the land where he and his family have always farmed. To learn more about Curtis Buchanan’s trees, chairs and classes, visit curtisbuchananchairmaker. com. To learn more about Green Wood/Madera Verde, visit greenwoodglobal.org. To purchase a Christmas tree from Warren Wilson College, e-mail forestry student Kira Santulli at ksantulli@warrenwilson.edu X John Piper Watters is a father, artist and freelance writer with a day job and can be reached at johnpwatters@hotmail.com.

gardeningcalendar Calendar for December 15 - 23, 2010 Pearson Community Garden Workdays • WEDNESDAYS, 3-9pm - Gather in the Pearson Garden at the end of Pearson Drive in Montford with folks and grow some food. A potluck and produce to take home often follow the work. Regional Tailgate Markets For more information, including the exact start and end dates of markets, contact the Appalachian Sustainable Agriculture Project. Info: 236-1282 or www.buyappalachian.org. • WEDNESDAYS, 2-6pm - Asheville City Market - South, Biltmore Town Square Blvd. —- 2-6:30pm - Wednesday Coop Market, 76 Biltmore Ave. —- 3-6pm - Victory Tailgate Market, in the parking lot adjacent to ABCCM Veterans Restoration Quarters on Tunnel Road, Asheville —- 2:30-6:30pm - Weaverville Tailgate Market, on the hill overlooking Lake Louise —- 3-7pm - Market on South Main, in the parking lot between Good Stuff and the Marshall Presbyterian Church —- 2-5:30pm - Spruce Pine Farmers Market, on Pollyanna’s Porch on Upper Street. • WEDNESDAYS & SATURDAYS, 8am-1pm - Haywood’s Historic Farmers Market, located in Waynesville at the HART Theater and Shelton House parking lot on Pigeon Street —- 8am-Noon - Waynesville Tailgate Market, at the American Legion, just off S. Main Street —- WE, noon-5pm & SA, 8am-1pm - Cashiers Tailgate Market, in the parking lot of Cashiers Community Center. • THURSDAYS, 10am-2pm - Mission Hospital Tailgate Market, at the back entrance to the Mission Hospital Heart Center on Memorial Campus —- 3-6pm - Flat Rock Tailgate Market, located in the parking area behind the Hand in Hand Gallery in Flat Rock —- 4-6:30pm - Tryon Tailgate Market, on Trade Street —- 4:30-7pm - Black Mountain Farmers Market, corner of S. Ridgeway and Sutton in Black Mountain. • FRIDAYS, 4-6:30pm - Saluda Tailgate Market, Westend city municipal parking. • SATURDAYS, 8am-1pm - Asheville City Market, in the parking lot of the Public Works Building, 161 S. Charlotte St. —- 9am-Noon - Big Ivy Tailgate Market, in the parking lot of the old Barnardsville fire station on Hwy. 197 —- 9am-Noon - Black Mountain Tailgate Market, 130 Montreat Road —- 8am-Noon - North Asheville

Ashev i l l e’s

Tailgate Market, on the campus of UNCA, commuter lot #C —- 9am-Noon - Riceville Tailgate Market, adjacent to the parking area of the Riceville Community Center —- 7am-Noon - Henderson County Tailgate Market, 100 N. King St., Hendersonville —- 9am-Noon - Mills River Farm Market, directly off of NC 280 in the Mills River Commons Shopping Center —- 9am-Noon - Jackson County Farmers Market, in the municipal parking lot next to Bridge Park —- 9am-1pm - Madison County Farmers and Artisans Market, across from the football fields on the Mars Hill College campus —- 8amNoon - Bakersville Farmers Market, in the Bakersville Community Medical Clinic parking lot —- 8-11:30am - Columbus Tailgate Market, Courthouse Street in front of the Polk County Courthouse —- 8:30am-12:30pm Yancey County Farmers Market, Highway 19E at S. Main Street, Burnsville. • SUNDAYS, 9am-2pm - Greenlife Sunday Market, 70 Merrimon Ave., Asheville —- Noon-4pm - Sundays on the Island, cross the river at the Courthouse on Main St. in downtown Marshall and turn right onto the island. • MONDAYS, 3-6pm - Hendersonville Community Co-op Tailgate Market, in the parking lot of the Hendersonville Community Co-op. • TUESDAYS, 3:30-6:30pm - West Asheville Tailgate Market, 718 Haywood Road —- 5-7pm - Green Creek Tailgate Market, on Rte. 9 in Green Creek, Columbus. • TUESDAYS, THURSDAYS & SATURDAYS, 8am-2pm - Hendersonville County Curb Market, on Church Street, directly across from the old courthouse in Hendersonville —- TU, 3-6pm & TH & SA, 8am-1pm - Transylvania Tailgate Market, in the parking lot behind the corner of Jordan and Johnson Streets. • TUESDAYS & SATURDAYS, 7am-Noon - Canton Tailgate Market, in the muncipal parking lot on Park Street.

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Check out the Gardening Calendar online at www. mountainx.com/events for info on events happening after December 23.

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holidays WELCOME TO LILVILLE WITH THE CASHEW CAROLERS! Do you see that arm poking out of the heap of tinsel and wrapping paper? It’s the Mountain Xpress Holiday Guides waving farewell, at least for this year.

Christmas coming just around the corner, The Xpress shows you where to go. Yuletide guidance with the Cashew choir, Dressed up like a three-bird meat roll.

Haven’t had your fill after the first two guides? You will after some turducken, which is literally the babushka doll of smoked meats. Or maybe you have no plans yet for Christmas, and you were about to just take a nap until March 21. Luckily, a certain red-nosed pilot-turned author joins us to suggest some enticing activities for those of us with no plans. And there are all the recipes, gift suggestions and charity profiles you’ve come to expect from us.

You know that the Mountain Xpress is on its way, Loaded with lots of tips and stories for you to read. And everyone in Asheville is going to see Rudolph at the Waffle House drinking coffee.

And, of course, a carol too, this time to the tune “Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire”:

Everybody knows F. Scotty and some Zelda Fitz, Help to make the season bright. Tiny tots with their eyes all aglow, Just seem to make the holidays feel right.

DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

And so, we’re offering this simple guide To readers all the way in 28802, And it can be read many times, many ways, Holiday Guides, the Mountain Xpress.

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lidays from Kilw o H y p in’s ap

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by Jaye Bartell There are many reasons why Christmas may not be a cause for distinct celebration to some. Judaism, for one. Or maybe it’s just not something one does. Even if the day itself is not directly relevant, usual life is still effectively on hold and a certain solemnity is in the air. I was going to suggest that those who find themselves alone this December 25 go rent Fanny and Alexander and spend the day drinking cider and eating the cookies left over from holiday parties. But there are only three video stores in town that carry the Swedish Christmastime saga, leaving an indeterminate number of holiday loners in want of a good itinerary. Then I remembered that a certain lavishly horned deer relocated to these mountains this past September, to enjoy a much-deserved sabbatical — well, almost. Rudolph L. May, known for his luminous navigation of flying sleighs, insists that this year’s break, his first since 1939 is not a retirement. “I’m not going down in history yet,” he says with a laugh. I visited Rudolph’s apartment on the fourth floor of the 21 Battery Park condominiums. He

24 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

was sitting in an overstuffed recliner, hoofing through a Mountain Xpress, which I thought he was doing just to placate his visitor until he exclaimed, “I just love Clubland. There’s so much going on at night.” Rudolph explains that, although Christmas Eve is presumed to be his only active night all year, he usually spends most of the fall and winter in training. “The summer has been my only break, if you call it that.” When the weather warms up, Rudolph and his friend Serge, a polar bear who shares Rudolph’s love of the outdoors “in any climate — not just the featureless tundra,” head south to Greenland “with just our bathing suits and some back issues of Sports Illustrated” to do some snowmobiling. “But enough about the great North,” Rudolph says, “I’m really excited to test-drive the guidebook I’m working on.” Rudolph explains that a large part of why he came to Asheville was to “cook up a travel guide, in the manner of Rick Steves, but with a twist.” Tentatively called Reindeer Games: Awakening Your Red Nose on the Fly, Rudolph’s manual holds naiveté as “an exciting way to travel. My travel guide is a compass for those who don’t know how to use a compass — guaranteed fun.”

Reindeer Games has a special section, Reclaiming Christmas: It’s Just Another Quiet Day Alone, that fits our purposes like a mitten. “The title is a little rough still, but the premise is solid,” Rudolph says. “I’ve enjoyed being the ‘ninth reindeer’ and everything — maybe not as much as kids have enjoyed the fruits of my labor — but I enjoyed it.” Rudolph says that the revelation that he could do something on Christmas other than Christmas came to him as he flew over Asheville three years ago. “It was weird,” he admits. “I saw a leafless bough in the red light of my nose and it just clicked.” He sent his son, Robbie the Reindeer, to Asheville the next Christmas to do some preliminary research. “Robbie has been, well, a true Rudolph. I am really following his direction.” We’ve culled a selection of Rudolph’s suggestions and arranged them in chronological order. Rudolph had one more important directive before I walked from his door, which, perhaps not surprisingly given his recent venturing out, bore no wreath. “Tell your readers — who seem great, don’t get me wrong — that if they see me having an egg sandwich at Waffle House, don’t talk to me.” He’s not mean-spirited, but rather “it will ruin it. It’s like what René Crevel said: ‘Solitude is the loveliest festival.’” 8:00 a.m. — It’s Christmas! Wake up! Just kidding. Go back to sleep! In your dreams, it can be any day you want. Seriously. It’s a beautiful morning and it will be even if you’re sleeping. It can be beautiful around you. 10 a.m. — OK, it’s time to get up. Sleeping is fun, but for a day to be special you need to approach it with open eyes. Don’t take a shower — you’re not going to see anyone anyway. Just pause to think that, for most people who have opened their presents, the day is basically over. For you, though, the day has just begun. Start decently with a cup of coffee and a bagel, muffin or a little box of cereal. Asheville has this cute place called Starbucks, 62 Charlotte St. 225-3753, open 7 a.m. to 6:30 p.m. I like the name because I am both a buck and a star. 11 a.m. — Don’t you feel like you’re flying? Good thing you went with the raspberry cruller. I could never eat them when I had to work. Pastries rob one of that certain finesse necessary to smile into the freezing winds of the upper air. You have some time to spare — not kill, because time is life! — before your 1 or 1:20 p.m. appointment (more on that anon), so take a walk. Follow Charlotte Street south until you get to the tree-lined perimeter of the First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. 252-4781. There is probably something going there today — at this exact moment. Just walk through the parking lot with your head up or down in wistful contemplation of the lives of others and your relation to them. Remember: The best way to celebrate your fondness for people is to not be around them! Noon — Hungry yet? Fiore’s Ristorante Toscana 122 College St. 281-0710 is open from 11 a.m. until 7 p.m. A source at the fine-dining establishment said there would be some wild game specials — perfect for our wild reindeer games, what!

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1 p.m. — It’s time for the greatest indulgence (other than Chinese) that’s still available on Christmas Day — the movies! The Fine Arts Theatre, 36 Biltmore Ave. 232-1536 shows two movies at a time, with matinees at 1/1:20 p.m. and 4/4:20 p.m., and nightly shows (weekdays) at 7/7:20 p.m. and 9/9:20 p.m. on weekends. You could just see two movies in a row, but then you would miss dinner! 4:30 p.m. — After a long walk down Tunnel Road, you’ve reached the ham on the table of the day: Christmas dinner at Waffle House, 1444 Tunnel Road 298-8138! The spirit of this place makes me wish I liked waffles (which you might, but I don’t. They’re so distorted!) Stay here a while. Get ten coffees and then get an iced tea. The tables may be crowded and the groups contain many people, so get a stool at the counter. I like to read Canterbury Tales on Christmas, but you should read any book you want. Other recommended authors for this time of year include Truman Capote, Nora Ephron and Fydor Dostoevsky. 8 p.m. — Whew. It’s been a long evening at Waffle House. Are you as jacked-up on java as this anthropomorphic reindeer? Let’s walk back to town and hit … 9 p.m. — Broadways, 120 N. Lexington Ave. 2850400. This place is institutional in the sense that it’s there! And they have to know you’re name because you have to be a member to enter. Or, you can pay a “member for a night” fee (this is what I did) and you’re in. You may not get your members-only jacket, but nobody does! I think I’ll order my favorite drink! A Red Stag (that’s cherry bourbon! Kid Rock loves this stuff! They have it on tap! Liquor on tap) ... What follows in Rudolph’s itinerary is not printable in this newspaper. But, be sure, it is not advisable either. Happy Just Another Quiet Day Alone! X Jaye Bartell can mountainx.com.

reached

jbartell@

BEFORE

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mountainx.com â&#x20AC;˘ DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 27

Helpmate in hard times

Gift-card donations make the holidays a little easier for victims of domestic abuse

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by Jaye Bartell The winter months can be hard on people. And when the season gets dark and cold, people can be hard on each other. When a situation between partners or spouses turns abusive, Helpmate, a crisis center for victims of domestic violence and their children, has a team of specialist-volunteers to help. “We’re the domestic violence agency for the community,” Valerie Collins, executive director of Helpmate, told Xpress. “We provide a number of services to help people during an immediate crisis, and to work through a domestic violence situation. We have a 24-hour hotline, an emergency shelter, individual and group counseling, civil and criminal court advocacy and we provide preventative education. We are probably most known for our emergency shelter. It is a 25-bed facility.” Collins has been a domestic abuse advocate for 15 years, and with Helpmate for the past 10. “Every time I think I’m seeing patterns with domestic abuse cases, I’m proved wrong,” Collins said when asked if the holidays aggravate the number of domestic violence cases. “The holidays themselves can be

wishlist Ongoing client and shelter needs: Cleaning Supplies (no- or low-odor preferable)

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Sleep Wear: flannel pajama bottoms/ boxers, oversized t-shirts, sweat pants

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828.669.0503 28 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

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stressful, because everyone is trying to make things perfect. But really we see an increase after a long period where the weather has been bad, when there’s a stressful situation in the household and you’re cooped up together — often the kids are out of school and there’s more activity than usual. We tend to see a real spike after the New Year,” which Collins attributes more to weather than holiday-season stresses. The increase of crisis situations in the winter and holiday season exacerbates a more general rise over the past few years, which, Collins has no doubt, is due to the unstable economy. “We have seen, more broadly in the last two years, a very sharp increase [of crisis situations] in general that we attribute to the recession. It’s significant. There has been a 40-percent increase in the nights of safety that we provide. Our crisis-line calls have increased by about that much too. What that says to me is that there are more people who need help, so they’re reaching out. It also tells me that when they get here there’s nowhere for them to go.” Due to the extreme sensitivity of the situations Helpmate deals with, “we’re very care-

Calendars, date/appointment books Board games for adults and children; cards, etc. For more information about donations, please contact Helpmate Development Director Ann Flynn at 254-2968 Ext. 11. ful about how we screen volunteers.” There are confidential ways to help, especially over the holidays. “What we encourage people in the community to do is to support people through the holidays by donating gift cards, which moms can then use to go shopping for their children — an empowering experience for them. Because we have such an itinerant population of people coming in when they’re in crisis, but then leaving once they’re stabilized, we don’t always know what to ask for in particular, and that way they can get what’s needed — the correct sizes of clothing or age-appropriate toys. It takes a lot of the guesswork out of it.” To make a gift card donation — or any financial contribution, year-round — contact Helpmate’s Development Director, Ann Flynn, at 254-2968 ext. 11, or email aflynn@helpmateonline.org. Donations can also be mailed to Helpmate directly, PO Box 2263, Asheville, NC 28802. X Jaye Bartell can be reached at jbartell@ mountainx.com.

A neighborhood retreat in historic Montford

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Special Events: • Sat. Dec. 18: 10% of all proceeds donated to the Literacy Council. • Dec. 21-24: $5 off any $15 purchase. $10 off any $25+ purchase. 31 Montford Ave. (across from the Chamber of Commerce) • 828-285-8805 Hours: Tues. - Sat. 11 - 6• Trade day: Sat. only 11 - 2 • Free Wi-Fi

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 29

want to help? ABCCM Steadfast House for Women and Children • Through (12/24), 9am-6pm - ABCCM Women & Children’s Shelter asks the community to sponsor a child in need. To sponsor a child, ABCCM will offer the name, age 0-18, size and interests/ideas for gifts. New gifts only. Drop off items at 20 Annandale St. Info: 37-3437 or brittany.williams@abccm.org. Asheville Area Habitat for Humanity Seeks Volunteers • TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS, 5-8pm - Head to Habitat and get a workout while volunteering in the Home Store warehouse. Info: volunteer@ashevillehabitat.org or call 210-9377. Big Brothers Big Sisters of WNC Located at 50 S. French Broad Ave., room 213, in the United Way building. The organization matches children from single-parent homes with adult mentors. Info: www. bbbswnc.org or 253-1470. • The Mentors and Matches after-school program, which requires an one-hour per-week time commitment, seeks volunteers to work with elementary students ages 6-14. Activities include helping with homework, playing educational games, making art and more. Info: www.bbbswnc. org. • Through MO (12/20) - Donations are needed for the youth ages 6-17 who live in a single-parent home. Items accepted: new toys, books and clothing. New items only. Info: 253-1470 or jamyed@bbbswnc.org. Children First/Communities In Schools of Buncombe County Info: 259-9717, gregb@childrenfirstbc.org or www.childrenfirstbc.org. • Through FR (12/17), 10am-4pm - Holiday Assistance Program Support: Volunteers are needed to wrap gifts, organize gift bags, contact families and hand out gift bags. Flexible two hour shifts are available. Info: 252-4810 or jodif@childrenfirstbc.org. Christmas Goody Bags • Through MO (12/20) - Help make the season brighter for residents of the Housing Authority of Asheville. Donations are needed to compile gift bags stuffed with apples, oranges, candy canes, assorted holiday treats, 2011 calendars and other festive items. Drop off items at 165 S. French Broad Ave. Info: 239-3510 or sbowers@haca.org. Community Action Opportunities • We (12/1) through MO (12/20) - The Community Action Opportunities’ Head Start program requests donations for children of low-income families. Items needed: food boxes, toys for children ages 3-5, clothing, coats, underwear, gloves and hats. New donations only. Drop off items at 25 Gaston St. Info: 252-2495 or leslie.hennessee@tcqr.org. Friends2Ferals • DAILY - Cat-loving volunteers are needed to help homeless cats. Duties include trapping, transporting to and from the Humane Alliance, post-surgery care, fostering kittens and fundraising. Info: 505-6737 or www.friends2ferals.org. Gift Wrapping for Hospice • Through FR (12/24), 9-5pm - CarePartners Hospice is looking for volunteers to share their gift-wrapping talents. Donations to CarePartners Hospice will be made by customers in exchange for this service. All materials are provided. Held at the Asheville Mall. Info: 667-0257 or bbp90@aol.com. Give the Gift of Home • Through FR (12/31) - Make a donation to Asheville Area Habitat for Humanity in the name of a loved one. Provide the recipient’s name and address and they will receive a card about the donation made in their name. Located at 30 Meadow Road. Info: 210-9361 or ahubbard@ashevillehabitat.org. Hands On Asheville-Buncombe Choose the volunteer opportunity that works for you. Youth are welcome to volunteer on many projects with adult supervision. Info: www.handsonasheville.org or call 2-1-1. Visit the Web site to sign up for a project. • Download “Twelve Days of Caring,” a list of 12 simple projects that make our community a better place to live

while refocusing on the true meaning of the holidays. Info: www.handsonasheville.org. • TH (12/16), 3:30-5:30pm - Teachers Pet: Volunteers will create supplemental educational materials that will be used in and out of the classroom to help elementary students improve their reading skills. Make flashcards, games and more. Instruction and materials will be provided. Holiday Gift Wrapping for The Red Cross • FR (12/17), 5-9pm - Holiday Giftwrapping: The Red Cross is looking for volunteers to share their gift-wrapping talents. Donations to American Red Cross will be made by customers in exchange for this service. All materials are provided. Held at the Barnes & Noble Bookstore in the Asheville Mall. Info: www.redcrosswnc.org, 258-3888, ext. 214 or tosettim@usa.redcross.org. Loving Food Resources LFR provides food, health and personal-care items to people living with HIV/AIDS or any person in home hospice regardless of diagnosis in WNC. LFR is a self-select food pantry. If you think you qualify and need some help: 2804112 or www.lovingfood.org. • Through FR (12/17), 6-8pm - Help Loving Food Resources Food Bank fill 125 cake boxes with homemade cookies and individually wrapped chocolates for their clients at the 20th annual Holiday Cookie Party. Held at the social hall of Kennilworth Presbyterian Church, Chiles Ave., Asheville. Bring four or more dozen homemade cookies to help us fill these boxes with love. MANNA FoodBank MANNA helps alleviate hunger in WNC by processing donated food for distribution throughout WNC. Located at 627 Swannanoa River Road. Info: 299-3663 or mannafoodbank.org. • Through FR (12/24), 10am-9pm - MANNA FoodBank seeks volunteers to help support the Ingles Giving Tree during their holiday fundraiser. Volunteers will greet people and man the donation table at the Asheville Mall. Info: 2993663, ext. 245 or amccarver@feedingamerica.org. Meals On Wheels Meals On Wheels delivers meals to more than 500 homebound elderly people each weekday through the help of a network of more than 300 volunteers. Info: 253-5286. • Meals On Wheels of Asheville/Buncombe County is seeking individuals interested in volunteering as substitute drivers to deliver meals to the homebound elderly. Free gas cards are provided. MotherLove Giving Tree • Through WE (12/15) - The Giving Tree, made of stars bearing wishes from a local teen mother for her children, will be on display in the lobby of the YWCA, 185, S. French Broad Ave. Pick out a star and make a wish come true. Info: 254-7206, ext. 116 or www.ywcaofasheville.org. Operation Toasty Toes Chapter 7 Makes yarn comfort items that are sent to troops deployed overseas. Info: 696-9777 or www.operationtoastytoes.org. • 1st & 3rd MONDAYS, 10am - Volunteers are needed to knit and crochet gifts for soldiers serving overseas.Meet at 105 Campbell Drive, Flat Rock. Salvation Army Info: 253-4723, ext. 17 or terrie.greene@uss.salvationarmy.org. • Through FR (12/17) - Volunteers are needed at the Salvation Army Angel Tree in the Asheville Mall, 3 S. Tunnel Road. Assist in adopting out “Angels” by documenting simple information and checking in gifts as they are returned. Volunteers shifts are flexible. • WE (12/15), 9am-4pm - Packing Christmas Food Boxes: Volunteers are needed to pack food into boxes for distribution to over 700 families receiving Christmas Assistance from The Salvation Army. Flexible shifts available. • TH (12/16) & FR (12/17), 9am-4pm - Christmas Gift and Food Distribution: Volunteers are needed to assist parents in selecting toys for their children, to assist with the distribution of Christmas dinner food boxes, as well as helping families load their cars. Flexible two-hour shifts available.

30 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Season of giving: Mary Timmins, 97, of Carolina Village in Hendersonville, saved her bingo winnings for a year to donate to the Salvation Army, which she did last week. Photo by Jonathan Welch

Santa’s Mission at Biltmore Village • Through SA (12/18) - Biltmore Village retailers at 10 Brook and 2 Swan Street host a holiday toy and gift drive benefiting patients at Mission Children’s Hospital. Please donate unused toys to children in need. Info: ShopBiltmoreVillage.com. Volunteer with Four Seasons The nonprofit end-of-life care organization seeks volunteers to help fulfill its mission to the patients and families it serves in Buncombe and Henderson Counties. Located at 571 South Allen Road in Flat Rock. Info: Volunteer@ FourSeasonsCFL.org or 692-6178. • TH (1/31), 1-4:30pm - An orientation class (required for all volunteer positions) will be offered. n Additional training classes will be required for those who wish to be involved in Patient Care, Home Care, Nursing Care, Assisted Living and Elizabeth House. Those classes will be held Jan. 17, 19, 24 & 26. Register online. WNC AIDS Project Info: www.wncap.org or 252-7489.

• Through MO (12/20) - The “Christmas for Families Living with HIV/AIDS” project seeks donations of gift cards from retail outlets, toy stores and book stores. Gift cards can be dropped off at 44 Fairview Road. Info: 252-7489, ext. 310 or gwhite@wncap.org. WNC Alliance Members of the WNC Alliance and the public are invited to be agents of change for the environment. Info: 258-8737 or www.wnca.org. • TH (12/16), 10am - Help take water samples at the Swannanoa River Watershed to identify bacteria pollution in our local waterways. No experience necessary. Training will be provided the day of the sampling. Contact the French Broad Riverkeeper to sign up: hartwell@wnca.org or 258-8737.

MORE VOLUNTEERING EVENTS ONLINE

Check out the Volunteer Calendar online at www.mountainx.com/events for info on events happening after December 23.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS! T-Shirts • Candles • Incense • Hand-Blown Glass Parts • Pipes • Papers 660 Merrimon Ave. 253-2883 80 N. Lexington Ave. 254-4980

1062 Patton Ave. 232-6030 1269 Tunnel Rd. 299-8880

140 Airport Rd. Arden - 654-0906

THE #1 SUBARU DEALER IN THE SOUTHEAST!*

585 Tunnel Rd. Asheville, nC 28805 • 828-298-9600 • www.pResTigesubARu.Com

*Based on 2009 Sales Reports from SOA.

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 31

joyful holiday art

ART BY tovah travis (ABOVE) / emeline scales (BELOW)

32 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 â&#x20AC;˘ mountainx.com

ART BY ayla dunham (ABOVE) / arelia garlock (BELOW)

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 33

Naughty or nice?

Two (very) opposite sides of the holiday-food spectrum by Mackensy Lunsford and Melody Grace Miller

Ready for a smoked fatty?

Don’t give a flying fig about your waistline or cholesterol level over the holidays? Would you rather chew the fat than gnaw on a carrot stick? If holidays are about happily overindulging now and worrying about the bulge later, welcome to the club. And really, what screams overdoing it more than three pounds of bacon? Who wants to tie ribbons on packages when you can weave strips of bacon together, then wrap it around several more pounds of sausage and barbecue? Shane Heavener of 12 Bones Smokehouse seems to work his magic with the naughty in mind. For those of you that have heard about the Bacon Explosion, a cult hit circulating through the interwebs and clogging the arteries of pork fans everywhere, you’ll recognize this recipe. Heavener rolls sausage and duck in a bacon lattice, then slowly smokes the whole thing. He calls it the “turducken smoked fatty.” Xpress had a chance to taste it, and some of us call it delicious. Heavener’s lightened his up

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144 Tunnel Road Asheville, NC 255-8697

418 N. Main St. Hendersonville, NC 693-4500

34 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

pretty naughty

a touch with turkey sausage and pulled bird, but feel free to experiment using his recipe as a guideline. For more information about 12 Bones, visit 12bones.com.

Feeling nice?

So bad, yet so good: The “turducken smoked fatty” at 12 Bones is one delicious way to put on the pounds. Naughty: Wrapped in bacon, this ain’t no vegetarian nut loaf. Photos by Jonathan Welch

Turducken smoked fatty Ingredients

1 pound of BBQ pulled chicken (fully cooked) 1 pound duck confit or smoked pulled duck meat 3 pounds of sliced bacon 5 pounds of turkey sausage, mild or hot (loose, uncooked) 1 red bell pepper, diced medium 3 poblano pepper, diced medium 10 cloves roasted garlic, mashed 1 pound red potatoes, boiled or roasted soft

To make filling

In a large mixing bowl, lightly crush potatoes with a fork. Add peppers, roasted garlic, pulled chicken and duck confit. Season with salt and pepper, then fold all together. Store refrigerated.

To make the outer layers

On a clean surface or cookie sheet, weave the bacon slices to form a rectangle.

Sprinkle the turkey sausage over the bacon lattice. Press the sausage to form an even layer across the lattice. The sausage should cover the bacon in one uniform sheet, but stop 2 inches from the edge of the lattice all around.

To assemble

Spread the filling over the sausage layer as evenly as possible. Carefully separate the front edge of the sausage layer from the bacon weave and begin rolling backwards. You want to include all layers except for the bacon weave in your roll. Keep the sausage as tight as possible. Once the sausage is fully rolled up, pinch together the seams and ends to seal all of the bacon goodness inside.

To cook

Smoke over indirect heat at 275 degrees with heavy smoke (or roast in oven at 300 degrees). Cook until internal temperature reads 165 degrees on an instant read thermometer, at least an hour and thirty minutes. Slice into rounds and serve.

After a full month of sumptuous eating, some folks might be left wondering how they’re going to keep that dreaded spare tire away. Who wants to miss out on grandma’s cheesy potato-bacon gratin or mom’s four-stick-of-butter chocolate cake (a la Paula Deen)? Then there’s all of the holiday parties with their platters of cookies, mini-quiches and candy, all washed down with a glass of spiked eggnog. Come January, many of us are going to wonder how we’ll take off those 10 pounds by bathing suit season. There is at least one tasty solution for the holiday flab problem, should you have the willpower: Don’t put the pounds on to begin with. As they say, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, right? Plenty of Asheville’s restaurants have menus full of options for both delicious and healthy eating — and you thought the two were mutually exclusive. “Don’t overeat, just eat until you’re full,” advises Shanon Blair, co-owner of the allvegetarian Green Light Café on Lexington Avenue — a simple but great reminder when you start reaching for seconds. Whether you are a vegan, vegetarian or just looking for nourishing alternatives, Xpress provides you with a few ideas to leave you feeling light and satisfied this holiday season. Chef Jason Sellers of the Laughing Seed Café shares wih us his recipe for whole-grain and-vegetable pilaf. Cherries, beets and other root vegetables jazz up this colorful dish to make a great accompaniment to holiday meals. Over at the Green Light Café, Blair offers a recipe for nut roast and vegan creamcheese cupcakes. “It was holiday time,” Blair explains. “We were all burnt out on tofurkey, so we thought: Fix some kind of roast rich in protein and vegetables — it’s a nice balance of grains, nuts and vegetables.” For more information about Laughing Seed, visit laughingseed.com. For more information about Green Light, visit greenlightcafe.com X

Help the Homeless this Holiday When you make your tax-deductible Holiday donations, please consider

Asheville Homeless Network www.ashevillehomeless.org

PO Box 205 Asheville, NC 28802 828-423-5883 Run by the homeless, without bureaucracy or overhead This ad was donated

We know how important your computer is to you. Sassy’s has the fastest repair service in town with 95 % of our repairs completed the same day, at no extra cost to you. We also have the best repair prices in town. Are you looking for a New or Used PC Computer or Laptop; come to Sassy’s. We offer fast build times and free data transfer from your old computer. Need service at your Business or Home? Sassy’s offers comprehensive on-site repairs and networking. Sassy’s has been in business for over 15 years with an A+ Rating from the Better Business Bureau. Why go to a Geek when you can come to a Guru? No appointment needed for in store service. Call 828-253-0853 or visit www.sassys.com

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 35

on the nice side

nice(r) Whole Grain and Vegetable Pilaf Serves 8 to 10 as a side

Ingredients 2 sweet potatoes, peeled and cut into Âź-inch pieces 2 parsnips, peeled and cut into Âź-inch pieces 2 rutabagas, peeled and cut into Âź-inch pieces 2 butternut squash, peeled, seeded and cut into Âź-inch pieces 1 large beet, peeled and cut into Âź-inch pieces extra virgin olive oil or virgin coconut oil to coat lightly

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Nice: Shannon Blair, co-owner of Green Light CafĂŠ, holds her options for keeping things lighter for the holidays.

Nut roast Ingredients 1 cup cooked rice 1 cup vegan or regular cheese, shredded 2 carrots, diced; half an onion, diced 2 celery sticks, diced; 1 cup crushed nuts 2 tbsp tamari or soy sauce Âź cup bread crumbs 2 tbsp spelt flour (or flour of your choice).

Procedure

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Sautee the carrots, onions and celery. PurĂŠe all ingredients and form into loaf on a baking sheet or in bread loaf pan. Mix 3 tbsp ketchup with 1 tbsp olive oil and brush onto top as a glaze. Bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes or until golden. For a not quite as â&#x20AC;&#x153;niceâ&#x20AC;? recipe for cream-cheese cupcakes, visit mountainx.com.

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36 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 â&#x20AC;˘ mountainx.com

2 tbsp extra-virgin olive oil Âž cup raw pumpkin seeds 1 tsp paprika pinch salt 1 small or medium red onion, small dice 1 small bunch cilantro, washed, dried, and minced 2 cups dry whole grain (like quinoa, wild rice, short grain brown rice, or millet), cooked salt and pepper (optional) Âź cup dried cherries, roughly chopped Âź cup mixed pitted olives, thinly sliced

Procedure Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Toss potatoes, parsnips, rutabagas, squash and beets in just enough olive oil to coat, season with salt and pepper, and roast on a sheet pan in the oven until fork tender. For best results, cook each vegetable separately. Transfer roasted vegetables to a larger mixing bowl. Heat 2 tablespoons olive oil in a sautĂŠ pan or frying pan over medium low heat and fry pumpkin seeds until they pop. Add paprika and salt, toss and remove from heat. Add pumpkin seeds, red onion and cilantro to mixing bowl with roasted vegetables, toss and adjust seasonings. For a sweeter emphasis, add dried cherries. For a more savory note, add olives. Also, experiment with smoked paprika in place of regular.

festivegatherings

Follow Mountain Xpress on Facebook at www.facebook.com/mountainx for local events, news & ticket giveaways!

Photos by JONATHAN WELCH

Tom Sawyer’s Christmas Tree Farm and Elf Village (pd.) See, hear, smell and touch Christmas at Tom Sawyer’s Christmas Tree Farm and Elf Village Holiday Fest in Glenville, NC near Cashiers. Take Farm Wagon Tours of Trees on weekends. Choose and Cut Your Perfect Tree Any Day! Visit Elves in the Elf Village! Create Holiday Art in the Craft Room. Mail Your Wish List at Santa’s Post Office. Hear Holiday Tales in the Storytelling Cabin. Navigate Clever Tom’s Christmas Tree Maze and Visit the Clauses in their Elf House. Shop the Big Red Barn for d√©cor and gift items and Santa’s Secret Shop for kidaffordable family gifts. Call 828-743-5456 / 800-662-7008 or go to www.freshtreez. com. Brother Wolf Animal Rescue A no-kill organization. Info: 808-9435 or www.bwar.org. • SU (12/19), Noon-4pm - Holiday Open House at the adoption center. There will be refreshments, activities for kids, desserts for sale, gift ideas for pets and people, free pawdicures, $20 micro-chipping, photos with Santa Paws and more. Giving Tree ornaments for animals on the “wish list” will be on display. Info: www.bwar.org/donate. Carolina Concert Choir • FR (12/17), 7:30pm & SA (12/18), 3pm - Carolina Concert Choir will present its 32nd annual holiday concert at St. James Episcopal Church, Hendersonville. $15 adults/$5 students. Info: www.carolinaconcertchoir.org. Chimney Rock State Park Open daily, weather permitting. For additional info, including admission rates: www. chimneyrockpark.com. • SA (12/18), 10am-3pm - Naturalist Series: “Handmade Holidays.” Taking cues from the natural world, participants will make a handmade craft just in time for the holiday season. $35 adults/$25 ages 6-15. ECO Events The Environmental and Conservation Organization is dedicated to preserving the natural heritage of Henderson County and the mountain region as an effective voice of

the environment. Located at 121 Third Ave. W. Hendersonville. Info: 692-0385 or www.eco-wnc.org. • TU (12/21), 7-9pm - Enjoy a “Winter Solstice Night Hike” in DuPont State Forest. Bring a flashlight and a warm drink to toast the Winter Solstice. Meet at Hooker Falls parking lot on DuPont Road. Events at Thomas Wolfe Memorial Located at 52 N. Market St. Info: www.wolfememorial.com or 2538304. • SA (12/18), 6pm & 7:30pm - Christmas on the Mountain: Noted balladeer and storyteller Sheila Kay Adams will present an evening of Southern Appalachian Mountains Christmas stories, traditional ballads and music. $10. FENCE Events The Foothills Equestrian Nature Center is located at 3381 Hunting Country Road in Tryon. Info: 859-9021 or www.fence.org. • FR & SA (12/17 & 18), 7pm - “Home for the Holidays” program, which includes traditional carols, stories of the Yuletide season and refreshments. Call or go online for tickets. Firestorm Cafe & Books

and Champagne Bar Moving Sale all DeceMber long! Come early for the biggest selection.

Basement Books 1/2 Off Moving Sale

Relocating to Grove Arcade January 2011 BPBX Gift Cards the perfect holiday surprise!

Moving Sale

Across from the north entrance of the Grove Arcade 828.252.0020 • batteryparkbookexchange.com

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 37

festivegatherings

t es gif ficat le! rti ilab e C va a

h oliD ay S ale! Starts wed. Dec. 15

SeaSonal ClearanCe on Clothing, Footwear & gear. Cool PriCeS on Dealer SamPleS great For giFtS! A consignment shop specializing in outdoor gear, clothing & footwear. Kayaks, Bikes, Backpacks, Camping & Climbing Gear, Guidebooks & Maps, Accessories and much more…

Wine makes a great gift!

20% off all cases (12 bottles or more)

Now through December 31 - or Give the gift of wine with

Santé Gift Certificates! wine. cheese. no attitude.

mon. - Sat. 10-6 • Sun. 11-5 444 haywood road, west asheville

secondgearwnc.com • 258-0757

Located at 48 Commerce St., Asheville. Info: 255-8115 or www.firestormcafe.com. • FR (12/17), 7pm - A Midwinter Night Solstice Ball. The Winter Solstice Costume Ball will feature a parade of costumes, prizes and a silent auction of handmade Pagan items. Books and donations for Pagan prisoners will be accepted. Coalition of Earth Religions (CERES) members and the public is invited. Flat Rock Playhouse The State Theater of North Carolina is on Hwy. 225, 3 miles south of Hendersonville. Info: 693-0731 or www. flatrockplayhouse.org. • SU (12/19) & MO (12/20) - Flat Rock Playhouse Family Christmas Party. Holiday Craft Fair • SA (12/18), Noon-7pm - Holiday craft fair at the West Village Market & Deli on Haywood Road in West

38 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Asheville. Arts and crafts, beer and wine tastings, food samples, music and more. Info: 707-1859. Holiday Events at the Grove Arcade Info: www.grovearcade.com. • Through SU (1/2) - Entries from the annual National Gingerbread House Competition will be on display. • FRIDAYS & SATURDAYS, 2-6pm & SUNDAYS, 2-5pm - Holiday piano tunes will be performed. • SA (12/18), 11am-5pm - Holiday festivities featuring photos with Santa, a reading of Twas the Night Before Christmas by Darr Conradson, music by the Lew Gelfond Trio and more. JinglePipes • WE (12/15), 6-6:45pm - Organ concert for Christmas, presented by Michael Barker, at Black Mountain Presbyterian Church, 117 Montreat Road, Black Mountain. Program will include favorite Christmas music. Free and open to all.

festivegatherings

“The largesT CrysTal gallery in The souTheasT” 391 Merrimon Ave. Asheville • 828.257.2626

www.pointsoflight.net

:c_dn Ndjg =da^YVnh Lake Julian Festival of Lights Take a festive drive through the lighted holiday displays at Lake Julian Park. A portion of the proceeds will go to Buncombe County Special Olympics. $5 car/$15 van/$25 bus. Info: 684-0376. • Through SU (12/19), 6-9pm - 10th annual Festival of Lights. Partial proceeds will benefit Buncombe County Special Olympics. Lighting of the Green at A-B Tech • Through WE (12/22), 6-9pm - Historic homes on A-B Tech’s Asheville campus, 340 Victoria Road, will be decorated with conventional lighting as well as energyefficient lighting. All are welcome to drive through. Info: http://abtech.edu. One Bazaar Holiday Music Festival Held at the Downtown Market, 45 S French Broad Ave. A holiday special featuring art, music, dining and shopping. Info: www.downtownmarketasheville.com.

• FR (12/17), 5-5:45pm - Blues, jazz and folk by Linda Mitchell —- 6-6:45pm - Appalachian-inspired tunes by Dave Turner. •SA (12/18), 5-5:45pm - Singer/songwriter Aaron LaFalce will perform —- 6-6:45pm - Blues by Peggy Ratusz. Operation Toasty Toes Chapter 7 Makes yarn comfort items that are sent to troops deployed overseas. Info: 696-9777 or www.operationtoastytoes.org. • Through MO (1/3) - View the second annual Christmas Tree dedicated to our armed forces, featuring silver stars with photos of service members who have received packages of yarn comfort items. On display in the rear lobby of the Hendersonville Public Library. Performances at Diana Wortham Theatre For ticket information or more details: 257-4530 or www.dwtheatre.com.

Have Your Relatives Stay With Us...

Beaufort House Inn

61 N. Liberty Street, Asheville, NC 28801 www.beauforthouse.com • 828-254-8334 mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 39

Green Building Directory 2011

festivegatherings

Early Bird Rates End Dec. 17th!

Don’t miss the opportunity to be in this great annual resource.

advertise@mountainx.com (828) 251-1333

40 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

• SU (12/19), 2pm & 7pm - A Swannanoa Solstice. Traditional and contemporary Celtic and American holiday music and storytelling with multi-instrumentalists Al Petteway, Amy White and Robin Bullock, storyteller Sheila Kay Adams, stepdancers The Twisty Cuffs, fiddler Alex Reidinger, bagpipers Steven Agan and E.J. Jones, and host Doug Orr. $35/$33/$30/$12. Transylvania Community Arts Council Located at 349 S. Caldwell St., Brevard. Hours: Mon.Fri., 10am-4pm. Info: 884-2787 or www.artsofbrevard. org. • FR (12/17), 5-9pm - Brevard Gallery Walk. Do some holiday shopping while enjoying wine, munchies and music. Transylvania Heritage Museum Located at 189 W. Main Street, Brevard. Hours: Wed.Sat., 10am-5pm. Donation. Info: 884-2347 or www. transylvaniaheritage.org.

• SA (12/18), 2pm - Create Victorian Christmas cards/ ornaments. The Transylvania Heritage Museum will be filled with Victorian toys/inventions from the Victorian era. Unity Center Events Celebrate joyful, mindful living in a church with heart. Contemporary music by Lytingale and The Unitic Band. Located at 2041 Old Fanning Bridge Road, Mills River. Info: 684-3798, 891-8700 or www.unitync.net. • SU (12/19), 12:45pm - Christmas Pageant and Potluck. Enjoy a communal meal (bring a dish to share) and watch Unity children perform a Christmas Pageant.

MORE FESTIVALS & GATHERINGS ONLINE

Check out the Festival & Gatherings Calendar online at www.mountainx.com/events for info on events happening after December 23.

calendar

your guide to community events, classes, concerts & galleries

calendar categories community events & workshops / social & shared-interest groups / government & politics / seniors & retirees / animals / technology / business & careers / volunteering / health programs / support groups / helplines / sports groups & activities / kids / spirituality / arts / spoken & written word / festivals & gatherings / music / theater / comedy / film / dance / auditions & call to artists Calendar for December 15 - 23, 2010 Unless otherwise stated, events take place in Asheville, and phone numbers are in the 828 area code. Day-by-day calendar is online Want to find out everything that’s happening today — or tomorrow, or any day of the week? Go to www. mountainx.com/events. Weekday Abbreviations: SU = Sunday, MO = Monday, TU = Tuesday, WE = Wednesday, TH = Thursday, FR = Friday, SA = Saturday

Community Events & Workshops Asheville Design Center An exhibit and meeting space at 8 College St.,

Asheville. Info: www.ashevilledesigncenter.org. • WE (12/15), 6pm - ADC Winter Film Series: Citizen Architect: Sam Mockbee and the Spirit of the Rural Studio. A documentary film chronicling the late Samuel Mockbee, artist, architect, educator and founder of the Rural Studio.

BEAR Closet II • 1st WEDNESDAYS, Noon-6pm & 3rd WEDNESDAYS, 9am-Noon - The Closet provides families with baby/children’s clothing and diapers and has baby equipment on loan. Volunteers available to assist with accessing additional community services. At Abernethy United Methodist Church, 1418 Patton Ave. Info: 254-2612.

Calendar deadlines:

*FREE and PAID listings - Wednesday, 5 p.m. (7 days prior to publication) Can’t find your group’s listing?

Due to the abundance of great things to do in our area, we only have the space in print to focus on timely events. Our print calendar now covers an eight-day range. For a complete directory of all Community Calendar groups and upcoming events, please visit www.mountainx.com/events..

Calendar Information In order to qualify for a free listing, an event must cost no more than $40 to attend and be sponsored by and/or benefit a nonprofit. If an event benefits a business, it’s a paid listing. If you wish to submit an event for Clubland (our free live music listings), please e-mail clubland@mountainx.com. Free Listings To submit a free listing: * Online submission form (best): http://www.mountainx.com/ events/submission * E-mail (second best): calendar@mountainx.com * Fax (next best): (828) 251-1311, Attn: Free Calendar * Mail: Free Calendar, Mountain Xpress, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802 * In person: Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall St. (the Miles Building), second floor, downtown Asheville. Please limit your submission to 40 words or less. Questions? Call (828) 251-1333, ext. 365. Paid Listings Paid listings lead the calendar sections in which they are placed, and are marked (pd.). To submit a paid listing, send it to our Classified Department by any of the following methods. Be sure to include your phone number, for billing purposes. * E-mail: marketplace@mountainx.com. * Fax: (828) 251-1311, Attn: Commercial Calendar * Mail: Commercial Calendar, Mountain Xpress, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802 * In person: Classified Dept., Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall St. (the Miles Building), Ste. 214, downtown Asheville. Questions? Call our Classified Department at (828) 251-1333, ext. 335.

Social & SharedInterest Groups Arise & Shine Toastmasters Through participation in the Toastmasters Communication and Leadership program, people from all backgrounds learn to effectively speak, conduct a meeting, manage a department or business, lead, delegate and motivate. Info: 776-5076. • THURSDAYS, 7:308:30am - Meeting at the University Highsmith building at UNCA. Artistic Asheville Singles Group • WEEKLY - Meeting locations vary. For single people under 35. Info: coolspiritualartistic@gmail. com. Financial Therapy Groups • TUESDAYS, 7-8pm - Try out new ways of living and of being, supported by others with similar circumstances, for the collective wisdom of the group to enlighten all, while lightening the burden of each. $8. Info: www.financialtherapygroups.com. Futurist Group Forming in Asheville • Interested in the future? A futurist group is forming in Asheville to discuss various topics. This will make us sharper citizens, workers and business owners. If you are interested in tomorrow, join us. Info: ashevillefuturist@gmail. com. Land of Sky Toastmasters Your success in business is based on how effective you are. Through participation in the Toastmasters Communication and Leadership program, people from all backgrounds learn to effectively speak, conduct a meeting, manage a department or business, lead, delegate and motivate. $10/month. Info: www.landofskytoastmasters.org. • TUESDAYS, 7am - Meeting at the South Asheville Reuter YMCA. Scrabble Club Come play America’s favorite word game SCRABBLE. Info: 252-8154

or www.ashevillescrabble. com. • SUNDAYS, 1-5pm Meets at Books-A-Million in Asheville. Also meets at Barnes & Noble on Wednesdays at 6:30pm. We have all the gear; just bring your vocabulary. No dues the first six months. WNC Parrothead Club • TH (12/23), 7pm - Jimmy Buffett fan club meets at the Holiday Inn in West Asheville. Fans of music, bigger fans of giving back to WNC. Join us for charitable opportunities, fun and tunes from the Caribbean Cowboys Band. Free. Info: www.wncphc. com.

Government & Politics Asheville Tea Party “Commit to the advancement of individual liberty, Constitutionally-limited government, fiscal responsibility and free markets.” Info: ashevilleteaparty.org. • FR (12/17), 6pm - TeaTime Social at Tripps Restaurant, 311 College St. LibertyOnTheRocks.org A national nonpartisan social group connecting liberty advocates. • MONDAYS, 7pm - The Liberty on the Rocks social meets at El Chapala Restaurant off of Merrimon Ave. Info: infinitybbc@ gmail.com.

Seniors & Retirees Fitness at North Asheville Community Center An exercise group welcomes new participants interested in fun exercise. Come get healthy, and it’s free, too! No discrimination against younger participants. • MONDAYS & THURSDAYS, 9-9:45am - Exercise. Lakeview Senior Center 401 S. Laurel Circle, Black Mountain. Info: 669-8610. • TH (12/16), 1pm - Take a trip to see the National Gingerbread House Competition on display at the Grove Arcade. $3. • FR (12/17), 11am-1pm Holiday Potluck. There will

weeklypicks Events are FREE unless otherwise noted. public is invited to an organ concert for Christmas on Wednesday, Dec. 15, from 6 wed The to 6:45 p.m. The Christmas-music concert is presented by Michael Barker, and will be held

at Black Mountain Presbyterian Church, 117 Montreat Road, in Black Mountain. Info: 6692725. City Lights Bookstore presents Coffee with the Poet on Thursday, Dec. 16, at 10:30 a.m.

thur Local poet and featured guest Laura Hope Gill, author of Soul Tree, will read from selected works of poetry. Located at 3 E. Jackson St. in downtown Sylva. Info: 586-9499.

fri

View local and regional gallery exhibitions, sip wine and munch on savory holiday treats at the Brevard Gallery Walk on Friday, Dec. 17, from 5 to 9 p.m. Info: 884-2787 or artsofbrevard. org.

sat

Noted balladeer and storyteller Sheila Kay Adams will present an evening of Southern Appalachian Mountains Christmas stories, traditional ballads and music at “Christmas on the Mountain,” on Saturday, Dec. 18 at 6 p.m. and again at 7:30 p.m. Held at Thomas Wolfe Memorial, 52 N. Market St. $10. Info: 253-8304 or wolfememorial.com.

sun

Sunday, Dec. 19, is your last chance to take a drive from 6 to 9 p.m. through the lighted holiday displays at Lake Julian Park, the 10th annual Festival of Lights. $5 car/$15 van/$25 bus. A portion of the proceeds benefit Buncombe County Special Olympics. Info: 684-0376. Come listen to or perform at a holiday open mic on Monday, Dec. 20, from 6 to 9 p.m.-ish at

mon Skinny Beats Drum Shop, 4 Eagle St., downtown Asheville. Love donations appreciated. Info: 776-3786 or wncmusiciansmeetup.com.

tue

Go on a "Winter Solstice Hike" on Tuesday, Dec. 21, from 7 to 9 p.m. in DuPont State Forest. Bring a flashlight and a warm drink to toast the Winter Solstice. Meet at Hooker Falls parking lot on DuPont Road. Info: 692/0385 or eco-wnc.org.

be food, trivia, music and door prizes. Ham, drinks and paper goods are provided. Please bring a dish to share. RSVP: 669-8610.

Animals Brother Wolf Animal Rescue A no-kill organization. Info: 808-9435 or www.bwar. org. • SU (12/19), Noon-4pm Holiday Open House at the adoption center. There will be refreshments, activities for kids, desserts for sale, gift ideas for pets and people, free pawdicures, $20 micro-chipping, photos with Santa Paws and more. Giving Tree ornaments for animals on the “wish list” will be on display. Info: www.bwar.org/donate. Community Partnership for Pets This nonprofit’s primary goal is to provide affordable spay/neuter services to communities in/around Henderson County. Info: 693-5172 or www.communitypartnershipforpets. org.

• 1st & 4th SATURDAYS, Noon-3pm - Purchase your spay/neuter vouchers at the Blue Ridge Mall, 1800 Four Seasons Blvd., Hendersonville (at the Kmart entrance). $20 cats/$30 dogs. Dog Agility Trials For more information about the Blue Ridge Agility Club of WNC: 697-2118 or www.blueridgeagility.com. • FR (12/17) through SU (12/19), 8am-3pm - USDAA Dog Agility Trial at the WNC Agricultural Center, McGough Arena. Dogs jump through hurdles, race through tunnels and climb over A-frames at high speed. Free. Transylvania Animal Alliance Group For information about T.A.A.G., or donations of time or resources, 9663166, taagwags@citcom. net, www.taagwags.org or www.taag.petfinder.com. • SATURDAYS, 11am4pm - Adoption Days at PETsMART on Airport Road in Arden. View adoptable animals on the web-

site or at www.facebook. com/TAAGwags.

Business Ready To Sell Or Buy A Restaurant In WNC? (pd.) We work exclusively with the food and beverage industry. • Contact National Restaurant Properties in Asheville: (828) 225-4801. jeffnra@ bellsouth.net • www.restaurantstore.com OnTrack Financial Education & Counseling Formerly Consumer Credit Counseling Service of WNC. OnTrack offers services to improve personal finances. Unless otherwise noted, all classes are free and held at 50 S. French Broad Ave., Ste. 222. Info: 255-5166 or www.ontrackwnc.org. • TH (12/16), 1-3pm - Rental Education Class. This class covers how to conduct a rental search and how to establish and maintain a mutually beneficial, professional

relationship with the landlord. Free. • MO (12/20), 3-4:45pm - NAACP Credit Reports/ Credit Awareness Project. Held at the NAACP Empowerment Resource Center, 91 Patton Ave. Free.

Technology DisAbility Partners Located at 108 New Leicester Hwy., Asheville. Info: 298-1977, www. westernalliance.org or www.disabilitypartners.org. • MONDAYS through FRIDAYS, 8:30am-5pm - Give your computer a second life by donating it to Western Alliance to benefit people with disabilities. Donations are tax deductible. Free Mac Computer Classes Classes are held at Charlotte Street Computers, 252 Charlotte St. To register: classes@charlottestreetcomputers.com. • MONDAYS, 12:1512:45pm - Mac OSX.

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 41

Health Programs

pardeehospital.org or 6924600. • FR (12/17), 1:30-3pm - “Creating Your Personal Health Record,” a workshop with Jean Sitton, RN and case manager with Pardee.

Lift Your Mood Women’s Circle • Begins January 3 (pd.) Create your individualized approach to help move through “dark night of the soul”, depression, anxiety with attention to body, mind, spirit. Program addresses nutrition, exercise, attitude, beliefs, mindfulness, support, etc. • Mondays, 7pm for 12 weeks. • $240 includes workbook. • Flex payment option. Pre-register by December 29. • Information/registration: Marsha Rand, 772-5315. Maitri Center for Women. ADD/ADHD and Meditation: Introduction Scientific findings from medical journals on the applications of the Transcendental Meditation technique for treatment of ADHD and other learning disorders. Discussion, video and Q&A. Free. Info: www.adhd-tm.org. • WEEKLY - Meets at the Asheville TM Center, 165 E. Chestnut St. Info: 2544350. Art of Intimacy Learn life-changing communication and relationship skills, drawing from the work of Marshal Rosenberg (Nonviolent Communication), Brad Blanton (Radical Honesty), Susan Campbell (Getting Real), John Bradshaw (Homecoming) and others. $60/4-session class. Info: 254-5613 or www.theREALcenter.org. • WEDNESDAYS, 7:309:30pm - Meeting. C.L.O.S.E.R.R. Community Liaison Organization for Support, Education, Reform and Referral. The group offers support, networking, education, entertainment and fellowship for the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Transsexual, Straight and their Allies. • TUESDAYS, 7-9pm - Meets in the social room at All Souls Episcopal in Asheville. Events at Pardee Hospital All programs held at the Pardee Health Education Center in the Blue Ridge Mall in Hendersonville. Free, but registration and appointments required unless otherwise noted. To register or for info: www.

Free Blood Pressure Clinic • TUESDAYS, 1-6pm - The Faith Community Nurse at SOS Anglican Mission will offer free blood pressure checks at 370 N. Louisiana Ave., Suite C1. Info: rchovey@sos.spc-asheville. org. Henderson County Red Cross Red Cross holds classes in CPR and First Aid for infants, children and adults; Standard First Aid in Spanish; Babysitter Training; Pet First Aid. Located at 203 Second Ave. East, Hendersonville. Info: 693-5605. : Blood Drive dates and locations are listed below. Appointment and ID required. • WE (12/15), 7:30am4:30pm - Pardee Hospital, 800 N. Justice St. Info: 696-4225. • MO (12/20), 10am2:30pm - Henderson County Red Cross, 203 2nd Ave. East. Info: 6935605. Red Cross Events & Classes Red Cross holds classes in CPR/First Aid for infants, children, and adults; Babysitter Training; Pet First Aid; Bloodborne Pathogens; Swimming & Water Safety; and Lifeguarding. All classes held at chapter headquarters, 100 Edgewood Rd. To register, call 258-3888, ext. 221. Info: www.redcrosswnc.org. : Bloodmobile Drive dates and locations are listed below. Appointment and ID required. • WE (12/15), 1:306pm - Walgreens, 1835 Hendersonville Road. Info: 274-7560. • Through FR (12/24) “Pint for Pint” Blood Drive at the Asheville Donor Center, 100 Edgewood Road. All presenting donors will receive a coupon for a free pint of BBQ pork, Brunswick stew or a side item from Luella’s BBQ on Merrimon Ave. • FR (12/17), 1:30-6pm Lowe’s Home Improvement Warehouse, 24 North Ridge Commons Parkway, Weaverville. Info: 7829020.

• TUESDAYS, 12:1512:45pm - iPhoto class. • WEDNESDAYS, 12:1512:45pm - iTunes. • THURSDAYS, 12:1512:45pm - iMovie.

Support Groups Adult Children Of Alcoholics & Dysfunctional Families ACOA is an anonymous Twelve Step, Twelve Tradition program of women and men who grew up in alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional homes. Info:http://adultchildren. org. • FRIDAYS, 7pm - “Inner Child” meets at Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave., Asheville. Info: 989-8075. • SUNDAYS, 3pm “Living in the Solution” meets at The Servanthood House, 156 E. Chestnut St., Asheville. Open big book study. Info: 9898075. • MONDAYS, 7pm “Generations” meets at First Congregational United Church Of Christ, 20 Oak St. at College, Asheville.Info:474-5120. Al-Anon Al-Anon is a support group for the family and friends of alcoholics. More than 33 groups are available in the WNC area. Info: 800-2861326 or www.wnc-alanon. org. • WEDNESDAYS, 7:309pm - Newcomers meeting 7:30pm, Discussion meeting 8-9pm: West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road, across from Ingles. Enter through parking lot door. Info: 225-0515. • WEDNESDAYS, 8pm Al-Anon in West Asheville: Meeting at West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Rd., across from Ingles. Newcomers meeting at 7:30pm. Info: 258-4799. • THURSDAYS, 7pm - Discussion meeting for parents of children with addictions: West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road, across from Ingles. Info: 2426197. • FRIDAYS, 8pm - The Lambda (GLBT) group of Al-Anon is a gay-friendly support group for families and friends of alcoholics, and holds their weekly candlelight meeting at All Souls Cathedral, 3 Angle St. Info: 670-6277 (until 9pm). • FRIDAYS, 12:30-1:30pm - Discussion meeting: First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. Park in the back of lot between Church and Y. Info: 686-8131. • FRIDAYS, 6:30pm - Discussion meeting for couples only: All Souls

Cathedral, 3 Angle St. Info: 676-0485. • SATURDAYS, 10am - Al-Anon North: Meeting at Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. • SATURDAYS, 10am - Saturday Serenity at St Mary’s Episcopal Church on the corner of Charlotte and Macon. Beginners welcome. • SATURDAYS, Noon - Weaverville discussion meeting at First Baptist Church on N. Main St., next to the library. Enter via side glass doors. • SUNDAYS, 5-6pm Discussion meeting: West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road. Info: 281-1566. • MONDAYS, 7pm Black Mountain Al-Anon: Meeting at First Christian Church (Disciples of Christ), 201 Blue Ridge Road (corner of Blue Ridge Road and Hwy. 9). Info: 669-0274. • MONDAYS, 12-1pm - Discussion meeting: First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. Park in the back of lot between Church and Y. Info: 686-8131. • TUESDAYS, 5:30pm - 12 Steps and 12 Traditions Study at Kennilworth Presbyterian Church, 123 Kenilworth Road. • TUESDAYS, 7pm Discussion meeting: First Congregational United Church of Christ, 20 Oak St. Bipolar and Depression Support Group • WEDNESDAYS, 7-9pm - Magnetic Minds meets at 314-F Patton Ave., in the Parkwood Business Park. Peer support, empowerment, recovery and advocacy. Info: 318-9179. Cancer Support Group for Caregivers • MONDAYS, 11am-Noon - Meetings at Jubilee, 46 Wall St., Asheville. Emotional support for family members of people experiencing cancer. Facilitated by Licensed Clinical Social Worker. Love offering. Info: 2990394. Cancer Support Group for Women • MONDAYS, 1:30-3pm - Meetings at Biltmore United Methodist Church. Emotional support for women experiencing cancer. Facilitated by licensed clinical social worker. Info: 299-0394. Co-Dependents Anonymous A fellowship of men and women whose common purpose is to develop healthy relationships.

42 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

• MONDAYS, 7:308:30pm - Meetings at First Presbyterian Church annex building, 40 Church St., Asheville. Eating Disorders Individuals are welcome to come to one or all of the support group. Info: 3374685 or www.thecenternc. org. • WEDNESDAYS, 78pm - Support group for adults at T.H.E. Center for Disordered Eating, 297 Haywood St. Focus is on positive peer support, coping skills and recovery tools. Led by licensed professionals. Free. Journaling Group • THURSDAYS - Want to better know yourself? The single most essential instrument for nurturing your spirit is a personal journal. Sharing a journal with others can help clarify your thoughts, your emotions, and your reactions to certain people or situations. Info: 989-9811. MemoryCaregivers Network Support for caregivers of loved ones who suffer from dementia and Alzheimer’s. Info: 645-9189 or 7712219. • 1st TUESDAYS, 12:302pm - Meeting at Fletcher Calvary Episcopal Church. • 3rd TUESDAYS, 12:302pm - Meeting at New Hope Presbyterian Church. National Alliance on Mental Illness Dedicated to improving the lives of persons with severe mental illnesses, including schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, clinical depression, OCD, PTSD and anxiety disorders. Free connection recovery support groups. Info: 5057353. • 3rd TUESDAYS - Support 6-7:30pm —- Meeting 7:30- 8:3pm at 356 Biltmore Ave. Ste. 400 Overcomers Recovery Support Group A Christian-based 12step recovery program. Provides a spiritual plan of recovery for people struggling with life-controlling problems. Meetings are held at S.O.S. Anglican Mission, 370 N. Louisiana Ave., suite C-1. All are welcome. Info: rchovey@ sos.spc-asheville.org or 575-2003. • MONDAYS, 6:30PM - A support group for men will meet. Overeaters Anonymous A fellowship of individuals who, through shared experience, strength and hope, are recovering from com-

pulsive overeating. This 12-step program welcomes everyone who wants to stop eating compulsively. Meetings are one hour unless noted. • THURSDAYS, Noon Asheville: Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Rd. (S. 25 at Yorkshire). Info: 2981899. • SATURDAYS, 9:30am - Black Mountain: Carver Parks & Recreation Center, 101 Carver Ave. off Blue Ridge Road. Open relapse and recovery mtg. Info: 686-8131. • MONDAYS, 6:30pm - Hendersonville: Balfour United Meth. Church, 2567 Asheville Hwy. (Hwy. 25). Open mtg. Info: 1-800580-4761. • MONDAYS, 6pm - Asheville: First Congregational United Church of Christ, 20 Oak St. Open mtg. Info: 2778185. • TUESDAYS, 10:30amNoon - Asheville: Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. at Ottari. Open BBSS mtg. Info: 280-2213. S-Anon For those affected by someone else’s sexual behavior. Info: 545-4287 or 606-6803. • WEEKLY - Three meetings are available per week. Sexaholics Anonymous SA is a 12-step fellowship of men and women recovering from compulsive patterns of lust, romance, destructive relationships, sexual thoughts or sexual behavior. Call confidential voice mail 681-9250 or e-mail saasheville@gmail. com. Info: www.orgsites. com/nc/saasheville/. • DAILY - Asheville meetings. Womenheart of Asheville • Alternate WEDNESDAYS, 10am-Noon or 6-8pm - This support group for women with heart disease meets at Parkway Behavioral Health, 31 College Place. Info: Rickitannen@gmail.com or 505-2534.

Outdoors Asheville Track Club The club provides information, education, training, social and sporting events for runners and walkers of any age. Please see the group Web site for weekly events and news. Info: www.ashevilletrackclub.org or 253-8781.

• SUNDAYS, 8:30am - Trail run for all paces. Meet at the NC Arboretum, Greenhouse Parking Area. Info: 648-9336. Blue Ridge Bicycle Club For more information on the club, or to view a current and comprehensive club calendar: www.blueridgebicycleclub.org. • WEEKLY - Leads road rides ranging from novice to advanced skill levels. Rides usually have a designated Ride Leader and participants will not be left behind. Buncombe County Walking Club • TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS, 8:15am - Meet at the Sports Park in Candler. Gather at the picnic shelter. The purpose of the club is not to compete, but to build fitness and form friendships. Info: 250-4260 or grace. young@buncombecounty. org. Carolina Mountain Club CMC fosters the enjoyment of the mountains of WNC and adjoining regions and encourages the conservation of our natural resources, through an extensive schedule of hikes and a program of trail building and maintenance. $20 per year, family memberships $30 per year. Newcomers must call the leader before the hike. Info: www.carolinamtnclub.org. • SU (12/19), 8am - Avery Creek Loop. Info: 4581282 or mcornn@aol. com —- 1pm - Hard Times Road, Rocky Cove Road and Bent Creek Road. Info: 545-8545 or tmc3017@ gmail.com. • WE (12/22), 9am - Buckwheat Knob to Coontree Loop. Info: 7383395 or bcmorg@hughes. net. DuPont State Forest Located between Hendersonville and Brevard. Info: www.dupontforest.com. • SA (12/18), 1-3pm - A celebration of the 10th anniversary of public access to the falls at DuPont State Forest will be held at the High Falls Shelter. Light refreshments will be served. ECO Events The Environmental and Conservation Organization is dedicated to preserving the natural heritage of Henderson County and the mountain region as an effective voice of the environment. Located at 121 Third Ave. W.

Hendersonville. Info: 6920385 or www.eco-wnc. org. • TU (12/21), 7-9pm Winter Solstice Night Hike at DuPont State Forest. Celebrate the darkest, longest night of the year. Bring a flashlight. Swannanoa Valley Museum Hikes Unless otherwise noted, all hikes begin in the parking lot of Black Mountain Savings Bank, 200 E. State St. in Black Mountain. Info or reservations: 669-9566 or swannanoavalleym@ bellsouth.net. • 3rd SATURDAYS, 8am - The Swannanoa Rim Explorer hiking series will host treks along 31 miles of the Swannanoa Rim. For experienced hikers only. $20 members/$40 nonmembers. Bring lunch, water and snacks.

Sports Groups & Activities Filipino Martial Arts Kuntao: Traditional empty-hand system of self defense. Kali: Filipino method of stick-and-knife combat. First two lessons are free. Info: 777-8225 or http://kuntao.webs.com. • TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS, 7pm - Classes at Asheville Culture Project, 257 Short Coxe Ave. Waynesville Parks and Recreation Info: 456-2030 or recprograms@townofwaynesville.org. • MO (12/20), 6:30pm - An organizational meeting for the Adult and Master Basketball Leagues will be held. This meeting is mandatory for anyone interested in entering a team in either of theleagues (open to players ages 18-34 and ages 35-50+). The season begins on Jan. 10.

Kids At The Health Adventure Hours: Tues.-Sat., 10am5pm & Sun., 1-5pm. $8.50 adults/$7.50 students & seniors/$6 kids 2-11. Program info or to RSVP: 254-6373, ext. 324. Info: www.thehealthadventure. org. • THURSDAYS, 10:3011:30am - Preschool Play Date. Interactive fun just for preschoolers led by museum facilitators. Free with admission. • SATURDAYS, Noon-2pm - Experiment with science during Super Science Saturdays. Featuring

hands-on activities led by museum facilitators, the programs are fun for all ages. Free with admission. Celebration Singers of Asheville Community children’s chorus for ages 7-14. For audition/performance info: 230-5778 or www.singasheville.org. • THURSDAYS, 6:307:45pm - New singers are invited to join the chorus. Rehearsals at First Congregational Church, downtown Asheville. Hands On! This children’s museum is located at 318 North Main St., Hendersonville. Hours: Tues.-Fri., 10am-5pm. Admission is $5, with discounts available on certain days. Info: 697-8333 or www.handsonwnc.org. • FR (12/17), 3:30pm Make a gingerbread house. Call to register. $5 members/$10 nonmembers. • TH (12/23) & FR (12/24) - Make a bell-shaped ornament. Free for members/$5 nonmembers. N.C. Arboretum Events for Kids Info: 665-2492, jmarchal@ ncarboretum.org or www. ncarboretum.org. • SA (12/18), 10am - Wee Naturalist: Lizards and Snakes. Age-appropriate, nature-based activities for youngsters ages 2-5. $6. Performances for Young People at Diana Wortham Info & tickets: 257-4544, ext. 307 or www.dwtheatre.com. • MO & TU (12/20 & 21), 10am & Noon - School Show Series: The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe.

Spirituality Asheville Meditation Group (pd.) Practice meditation in a supportive group environment. Guided meditations follow the Insight/ Mindfulness/Vipassana practices. Insight meditation cultivates a happier, more peaceful and focused mind. Our &quot;sangha&quot; (a community of cool people) provides added support and joy to one’s spiritual awakening process. All are invited. • By donation. • Tuesdays, 7pm-8:30pm: Guided meditation and discussion. • Sundays, 10am-11:30am: Seated meditation and dharma talks. • The Women’s Wellness Center, 24 Arlington Street, Asheville. • Info/directions: (828)

808-4444. • www.ashevillemeditation.com Astro-Counseling (pd.) Licensed counselor and accredited professional astrologer uses your chart when counseling for additional insight into yourself, your relationships and life directions. Readings also available. Christy Gunther, MA. (828)258-3229. Mindful Self-Compassion Course: If Not Now, When? (pd.) Tired of being your worst enemy? Driven to perfection? Tough on yourself? Cultivate mindful selfcompassion practices for everyday life. Simple tools for responding in a kind and compassionate way to your suffering, feelings of inadequacy and self-judgments. 2 hour sessions, 8 session course. • Beginning week of January 17. • Evening and daytime courses. • Fee $140 includes all materials and book. • Enrollment ends January 10. • Course limited to 8 participants/ group. Call 231-2107 for more information. Open Heart Meditation (pd.) Learn easy, wonderful practices that opens your life to the beauty within and connects you to your heart. • Free. 7pm, Tuesdays and Wednesdays. 645-5950 or 296-0017. http://www. heartsanctuary.org A Course in Miracles • 2nd & 4th MONDAYS, 6:30-8pm - A truly loving group of people studying A Course in Miracles meets at Groce United Methodist Church on Tunnel Road. The group is open to all. Info: 712-5472. A Mountain Mindfulness Sangha Part of the World Community of Mindful Living, inspired by the teachings of THICH NHAT HANH, the group practices mindfulness as the energy of being aware and awake to the present moment. Practicing with a “sangha” (a community) can bring both joy and support. All are invited. Info & directions: mountainmindfulness@gmail.com, 6847359 or 299-9382. • THURSDAYS, 7-8:30pm - Sitting and walking meditation, followed by sharing by sangha members. • TH (12/16) - Recite and share in a Dharma discussion on “The Five Mindfulness Trainings” (a.k.a. “Precepts”). • TH (12/23) - An evening of Total Relaxation. Lie down comfortably with pil-

newsoftheweird Lead story

Britain’s National Health Service acknowledged in November that because of a shortage of healthy lungs and other organs available for transplant, it was offering those on waiting lists the option of receiving them from former smokers, drug addicts, cancer patients and the elderly. “You have to say,” noted an official with the agency’s Blood and Transplant unit, “Do you get a lung with more risk, or do you get no lung?”

Compelling explanations

• Discovered by police with about 11 pounds of packaged marijuana and a dozen plants, French farmer Michele Rouyer said the weed was for the 150 ducks he raises, a specialist having suggested that marijuana is effective in deworming and fever prevention. (Rouyer did acknowledge that, well, yes, maybe he also smoked a little of it himself.) In November, a court in Rochefort fined him the equivalent of about $700 — despite his declarations that his ducks are, indeed, worm-free. • Lame: (1) Former Groveland, Mass., police officer Aaron Yeo, who was fired in 2009 for sleeping on the job and lying to dispatchers about where he was, challenged the termination in October 2010, claiming through his lawyer that he’d declined to reveal his true location only because he was “watching for terrorists.” (2) CEO David H. Brooks, charged with tax fraud and insider trading, argued at his New York City trial in August that hiring prostitutes for staff and board members of his body-armor company was a legitimate expense, because it could “make [employees] more productive.”

Human rights watch

• In recent years, frisky Britons have popularized “dogging” — strangers meeting in remote public parks for outdoor sex — and government agencies appear to be ambivalent about it. Local councils want it stopped, but the Scottish police chiefs’ association recognizes that doggers have rights. (The

Surrey County Council, for example, recently considered bringing wild bulls into one park to discourage doggers, though a critic said romping bulls “will probably make [doggers] even more excited.” The chiefs’ association issued a 60-page “hate crimes” manual in October that urged officers to be sensitive to “outdoor sex” practitioners who, like other disadvantaged minorities, are vulnerable to hate crimes. • In November, the California Supreme Court unanimously ruled that some illegal immigrants are entitled to enroll in the state’s universities at the in-state rate (saving up to $23,000 a year), even though U.S. citizens who aren’t California residents might have to pay higher fees at the same schools. Although federal law prohibits special benefits for illegal immigrants, California’s law allows anyone who graduates from a state high school after attending for at least three years to pay resident rates — irrespective of their parents’ legal status.

Redneck chronicles

(1) Convicted murderer Joe Druce, serving life in prison in Massachusetts, subsequently murdered former pedophile priest John Geoghan, a fellow inmate. Nonetheless, Druce recently popped the question to Christian minister Shirl Borden, who agreed to marry him in October after five years as pen pals. Borden said the relationship turned romantic over their mutual love of NASCAR. (2) Harvey Westmoreland of Lawrenceburg, Ky., maintains that the $250 he was asking for his tractor was reasonable, but the potential buyer felt cheated and, with a friend, attacked Westmoreland. “They cut my beard and forced me to eat it,” Westmoreland reported. In November, the two men pleaded guilty to assault.

Least-competent people

(1) Police in Gumperda, Germany, arrest-

Read News of the Weird daily with Chuck Shepherd at www.weirduniverse.net. Send items to weirdnews@earthlink.net or PO Box 18737, Tampa FL 33679

ed a 64-year-old retired do-it-yourselfer in November after he drilled through a neighbor’s wall in their duplex home. The man had spent two days trapped in his own basement, where he’d laid bricks and mortar for a room but apparently forgot to leave himself an exit. (2) Sheryl Urzedowski, 38, was cited in September for DUI in Orland Park, Ill., after failing to walk a straight line. According to the officer’s report, Urzedowski put her hands on her hips and strutted to and fro “as if she were a model”; apprehensive about being arrested, she then asked the officer to read her “the Amanda rights.”

Recurring theme

People Who’ve Run Themselves Over Recently: (1) A 20-year-old man trying to push his car up a steep hill on Levering Street in Philadelphia lost control and was crushed and hospitalized (September). (2) Jackie Long, 52, crashed her car into a tree in Chipping Campden, England. As the car went airborne, her door burst open, she fell to the ground and was run over by the rear wheel, requiring hospital treatment (September). (3) A 51-year-old Francis, Okla., woman was killed by her riding lawn mower. She hit a pothole, was thrown about 14 feet ahead of the stilladvancing machine, and couldn’t move out of the way fast enough (September).

Ironies

• Jamie Riley, 27, was arrested in November for endangering her 3-month-old son by holding him “like a football,” according to police. They’d spotted Riley carrying on raucously while “celebrating” her recent “victory” over the state’s Department of Children and Family Services, which had investigated her for neglect. • Wrong Place, Wrong Time: In September, a tractor-trailer crashed on Interstate 70 near Terre Haute, Ind.; a traffic jam ensued when the cargo (a load of fire extinguishers) caught fire. And in October in Macomb Township, Mich., a 22-year-old man was killed when he accidentally ran into the path of a passing hearse.

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lows and a blanket, while you are guided into a deep state through song, bells and guided imagery. Please bring extra pillows and a blanket. An Evening With Spirit • MONDAYS, 6-8pm - You are invited to an evening with Spirit. Theo Salvucci channels messages from the angelic realm at The White Horse, 105c Montreat Road, Black Mountain. Donations only. Info: 713-2439. Aramaic Healing Circle: Birthing Christ • TU (12/21), 7-9pm - Aramaic healing onetime-only event with international Aramaic spirituality mystic Dale Allen Hoffman. Ancient Aramaic vocal intonations, crystal bowl meditation and prayer, and release ceremony. Love offering. At the Center for Spiritual Living, 2 Science of Mind Way, Asheville. Info: 253-2325. Asheville Center for Transcendental Meditation/ Free Introductory Lectures Your brain needs this: Scientists know TM creates brainwave coherence. Only an orderly brain can support higher consciousness. TM is easy to learn—enjoyable to practice. Dissolves deep-rooted stress, reduces anxiety and depression. Verified by 600 scientific studies. Info: 254-4350 or www. MeditationAsheville.org. • SUNDAYS, 2pm - Meeting at Maharishi Enlightenment Center, 165 E. Chestnut St. Learn how to directly access the field of infinite creativity, intelligence and bliss within you, revitalizing mind and body and creating peace in collective consciousness. Topics: Meditation and brain research; How meditation techniques compare; Meditation for social change; “What science says” and What is “transcending”? Free. Please RSVP. Asheville Fortune Teller’s Guild • SUNDAYS, 7pm - Meeting. The guild encourages honesty and responsibility as well as maintaining a high standard for readings. Tarot readers, astrologers, palmists and any other non-mediums or non-psychics are welcome. Location info: 777-9368. Asheville Friends of Astrology Info: 628-4007 or www. ashevillefriendsofastrology.org.

• FR (12/17), 7pm - Meet in the community room at Earth Fare, Westgate Shopping Center. Robert Lee Camp will discuss “Your Magical Birth Card.” Love donations encouraged. Info: 628-4007. Asheville Jewish Meditation and Chanting Circle • Alternate SUNDAYS, 1:15-3:15pm - Following the Awakened Heart Project’s (www.awakenedheartproject.org) approach to Jewish meditation, learn to cultivate an awareness of the Divine Presence. Gather at Congregation Beth Israel, 229 Murdock Ave., Asheville. Asheville Meditation Center Classes are held at the Vanuatu Kava Bar, 151 S. Lexington Ave, unless otherwise noted. Info: 5052300 or www.meditateasheville.org. • TUESDAYS, 6-8pm. Meditative Yoga from 66:45pm. Deep relaxation and seated meditation from 7-8pm. Donations excepted. Avalon Grove Nontraditional Celtic Christian worship services to honor the ancient Celtic holidays. Participants are welcome to bring vegetarian food to share after the service. Info: 645-2674 or www.avalongrove.org. • SA (12/18), 3pm Winter Solstice service. Avatar Meher Baba “I have come not to teach but to awaken.” Info: 2740307 or 274-7154. • SUNDAYS, 4pm - Meetings occur most Sundays in Asheville. Share Meher Baba’s inspiring message of divine love and unity in the midst of diversity. Call for locations. Awakening Practices Study the works of Eckhart Tolle and put words into action through meditation and discussion. Info: Trey@QueDox.com. • 2nd & 4th WEDNESDAYS, 79pm - Meets at Insight Counseling, 25 Orange St. Cloud Cottage Sangha This branch of the World Community of Mindful Living meets at 219 Old Toll Circle in Black Mountain, to practice seated meditation and mindfulness training. All events by donation. Info: 669-0920, cloudcottage@ bellsouth.net or www. cloudcottage.org. • WEDNESDAYS, 6-7pm - Community gathering for seated and walking

meditation, sutra study and discussion. • THURSDAYS, 6-8pm - Wild Mind, a creative writing and art workshop. Bring a journal. $25 suggested donation. • SUNDAYS, 11am - Eleven-Eleven-Eleven, a step study group of Alcoholics Anonymous. • TUESDAYS, 6-7:30pm - Mindfully Trim, free spiritual weight-loss support group. • 4th WEDNESDAYS, 6-7:30pm - “Learn to Meditate” class. Community Worship Service With Fellowship Meal • SUNDAYS, 2-4pm - Join SOS Anglican Mission, 370 N. Louisiana Ave., Asheville, for a worship service, followed by an Agape Fellowship meal. Compassionate Communication Practice Group Learn ways to create understanding and clarity in your relationships, work, and community by practicing compassionate communication. Group uses a model developed by Marshall Rosenberg in his book Nonviolent Communication, A Language of Life. Free. Info: 252-0538 or www. ashevilleccc.com. • 2nd & 4th THURSDAYS, 5-6:15pm - Practice group for newcomers and experienced practitioners. Creative Technology & Arts Center Located at Odyssey Community School, 90 Zillicoa St., Asheville. Info: www.ctacenter.org. • WEDNESDAYS, 5:30-7:30pm - “Sound Immersion,” with River Guerguerian and John Vorus. Info: www. ShareTheDrum.com. $15. Edgar Cayce Study Group • TUESDAYS, 2-4pm - Meet at West Asheville Unity Church, 130 Shelburne Road. Info: 2988494 or jasonference@ bellsouth.net. Ethical Society of Asheville A humanistic, religious and educational movement inspired by the ideal that the supreme aim of human life is working to create a more humane society. Meetings are held at the Botanical Garden’s Visitors Center, 151 W. T. Weaver Blvd. All are welcome. Info: 687-7759 or www.aeu.org. • SU (12/19), 2-3pm - “Liberating Liberals: A political synthesis of Nietzsche and Jesus, Vonnegut and Marx (Groucho, not Karl) and

Gandhi and Machiavelli,” a presentation by local author and philosopher Bill Branyon. Info: ethicalsocietyasheville@gmail.com. Events at First United Methodist Church Located at 204 Sixth Ave. W., Hendersonville. Info: 693-4275 or www.hvlfumc.org. • MO (12/20), 1-7pm &TU (12/21) & WE (12/22), 9am-7pm - The Advent Prayer Labyrinth will be open to the public. In a quiet space, a large canvas, imprinted with a replica of the labyrinth of the great cathedral of Chartres, France, will be laid out. Great Tree Zen Temple Daily, weekly and monthly retreats and zazen practice and study. Info: www. greattreetemple.org or 645-2085. • Year-round schedule, weekly study and meditation. Insight Meditation Group • TUESDAYS, 7-8:30pm - People of all experience levels are welcome to join this drop-in meditation group. Meditation instructions will be given to those who are new to the practice. $5. Info: http://bit. ly/9XujJ6. Land of the Sky United Church of Christ Located at Westminster Presbyterian Church, 15 Overbrook Place, in East Asheville. • WE (12/15), 5:30-7pm - Cookie bake for Loving Food Resources. Part of Advent Conspiracy Series: Taking Back the Season. Land of the Sky United Church of Christ hosts a series for all wanting to spend less, give more, and rekindle joy this Christmas. Meditation Group • SUNDAYS, 8-9pm Meditation followed by tea ceremony. By donation. “Yoga without meditation is like driving a car with no steering wheel.” Deepen your asana practice by cultivating mindfulness through meditation. Donations optional. Info: info@yogasouth-asheville. com. Mindfulness Meditation Class Explore the miracle of healing into life through deepened stillness and presence. With consciousness teacher and columnist Bill Walz. Info: 258-3241 or www.billwalz.com. • MONDAYS, 7-8pm - Meditation class with lesson and discussions in contemporary Zen living. At the Asheville

44 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Friends Meeting House, 227 Edgewood Ave. (off Merrimon Ave.). Donation. Mother Grove Events Info: 230-5069, info@ mothergroveavl.org or www.mothergroveavl.org. • SUNDAYS, 10am - Drum Circle —- 10:30am Weekly devotional service at the Temple. A simple service to ground and center you for the week. Spend some quiet time with the Goddess, with song, readings, meditation and prayer. At 70 Woodfin Place, Suite 2. • MONDAYS - Book discussion group, facilitated by Antiga, on the book The Creation of Patriarchy by Gerda Lemer. Info: 2859927. Mystic Heart Meditation • TU (12/21), 8-9pm - “Oneness Through your Mystic Heart,” a free Mystic Heart Universe Meditation via teleconference call. Celebrate the mystical union of outer divine consciousness and inner mystical heart. To sign up: 338-0042 or www.mysticheartuniverse. com. Mystic Heart Universe Meditation • TU (12/21), 8-8:30pm Free Mystic Heart Universe Meditation via teleconference call: “Oneness Through your Mystic Heart Meditation.” To sign up: 338-0042 or www.mysticheartuniverse.com. Psychic Development Class • 2nd & 4th WEDNESDAYS, 7-8:30pm Learn to use your intuition to help yourself and others. Explore remote viewing, channeling, mediumship, telepathy, precognition and healing in a relaxed and fun-filled atmosphere. All are welcome. Love donations accepted. Info: 828255-8304 or ecastro1@ charter.net. Reiki Tummo Healing Clinic • 1st & 3rd SATURDAYS - Heart-centered Reiki Tummo healing sessions offered by donation. Contact 776-6200 or eschmelt@charter.net to make appointment and indicate preference of 9:45, 10:30 or 11:15am slot. Info: www.wncheart.com/ healingclinic.html. Sound Healing at Skinny Beats Drum Shop • SUNDAYS, Noon - Linda Go facilitates Sounds of the Chakras and Sound Healing Circle for health and wellbeing at Skinny Beats, 4 Eagle St., Asheville. Love donations. Free

community offering from AshevilleSoundHealing. com. Info: 776-3786. Sri Sri Sri Shivabalayogi Meditation Group Receive initiation into Sri Swamiji’s one-hour meditation technique. One-hour of silent meditation followed by Bhajans (devotional singing). Fairview location directions: 299-3246. Info: www.shivabalamahayogi. com. • WEDNESDAYS, 7pm “Silent Meditation.” Free. St. Germain Aquarian Consciousness Fellowship Sacred spaceusing the St. Germain Violet Flameto support ascension clearingis created with live high-frequency intuitive piano music from classical composers and includesthe Atomic Accelerator Chair and Water into Golden Elixir ceremonies. Info: 658-3362. • WEDNESDAYS, 6:309:30pm - Meditation and potluck in the Weaverville area. The Flame Within • SUNDAYS, 6:30pm - A “ministry to the metal underground” meets at St. Paul’s Church, 32 Roscraggen, Arden. Enjoy music, worship and teachings. All who come in good will are welcome. Look for “Flame Within Ministry” on Facebook for details. Unitarian Universalist Church of Asheville Located at the corner of Charlotte St. & Edwin Pl. Info: 254-6001 or www. uuasheville.org. • SUNDAYS, 9:15am & 11:15am - Services. Unity Center Events Celebrate joyful, mindful living in a church with heart. Contemporary music by Lytingale and The Unitic Band. Located at 2041 Old Fanning Bridge Road, Mills River. Info: 684-3798, 891-8700 or www.unitync. net. • WE (12/15), 7pm - “Heartfelt Connections: Finding Harmony with Yourself and Others,” with Kaleo Wheeler. Love offering. Info: www.kaleowheeler.com. • WE (12/22), 7pm “Satsang with Chad.” Relax into peace through guided meditation. Love offering. Unity Church of Asheville Looking for something different? Unity of Asheville explores the deeper spiritual meaning of the scriptures combined with an upbeat contemporary music program to create a joyous and sincere worship service. Come join

us this Sunday and try it for yourself. Located at 130 Shelburne Rd., W. Asheville. Info: 252-5010 or www.unityofasheville. com. • SUNDAYS, 11am - Spiritual Celebration Service —- 12:15-1:30pm - A Course in Miracles classes with Rev. Gene Conner. Windhorse Zen Community Meditation, Dharma talks, private instruction available Tuesday and Thursday evenings, residential training. Teachers: Lawson Sachter and Sunya Kjolhede. Main center: 580 Panther Branch, Alexander. City center: 12 Von Ruck Court. Call for orientation. Info: 645-8001 or www. windhorsezen.org. • SUNDAYS, 9:30-11am - Meditation, chanting and a Dharma talk. • TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS, 7-9pm Meditation and chanting. • FRIDAYS, 5:30-7:15pm - Meditation and chanting at the City Center.

Art Gallery Exhibits & Openings 16 Patton Gallery hours: Tues.-Sat., 11am-6pm and Sun., 1-6pm (open on Sun. MayOct. only). Info: 236-2889 or www.16patton.com. • Through SA (1/8) Paintings and drawings by select staff and students of The Fine Arts League of the Carolinas and Reflections, a solo exhibition by Lori Gene, will be on display. American Folk Art & Framing The gallery at 64 Biltmore Ave. is open daily, representing contemporary selftaught artists and regional pottery. Info: 281-2134 or www.amerifolk.com. • Through SU (12/26) - Painter Cheri Bracket in Full Circle. Art at UNCA Art exhibits and events at the university are free, unless otherwise noted. • Through FR (12/17) - Transformation through Displacement, oil paintings, mixedmedia and drawing by UNCA senior Emily O’Brien, will be on display at Blowers Gallery, Ramsey Library. • Through TH (12/16) - Figurative Reflections, an exhibition of ceramic art by UNCA student Katie Scully, will be on display in the University Union Gallery.

• FR (12/17), 4-6pm - Closing reception for Transformation through Displacement. Art League of Henderson County The ALHC meets and shows exhibits at the Opportunity House, 1411 Asheville Hwy. (25N) in downtown Hendersonville. For viewing hours: 6920575. Info: 698-7868 or www.artleague.net. • Through FR (1/7) - 2010 All Member Art Show at the Opportunity House. Arts Council of Henderson County D. Samuel Neill Gallery hours: Tues.-Fri., 1-5pm and Sat., 1-4pm. Located at 538 N. Main St., 2nd Floor, Hendersonville. Info: 693-8504 or www.acofhc. org. • Through FR (12/24) - Through A Lens: Carolina Images, an exhibition of photography, will be presented at First Citizens Bank, 539 North Main St., Hendersonville. Asheville Art Museum Located on Pack Square in downtown Asheville. Hours: Tues.-Sat., 10am5pm and Sun., 1-5pm. Admission: $8/$7 students and seniors/Free for kids under 4. Free first Wednesdays from 3-5pm. Info: 253-3227 or www. ashevilleart.org. • Through SU (4/24) - The Olmsted Project. • Through SU (3/13) - The Director’s Cut: 1995-2010. Bella Vista Art Gallery Located in Biltmore Village, next to the parking lot of Rezaz’s restaurant. Open Mon.-Fri., 10am-5pm, and Sat., 10am-6pm. Info: 768-0246 or www.bellavistaart.com. • Through FR (12/31) - Feature wall artist Skip Rohde, Etchings & Dry Points of Asheville Area. New paintings: August Hoerr. Black Mountain Center for the Arts Located in the renovated Old City Hall at 225 West State St. in Black Mountain. Gallery Hours: Mon.-Wed. & Fri., 10am-5pm (closed Sat. during winter months). Info: 669-0930 or www. BlackMountainArts.org. • Through FR (1/21) - Gallery Pottery Show, featuring works from the Black Mountain Center for the Arts Clay Studio. Black Mountain College Museum + Arts Center The center is located at 56 Broadway, and preserves the legacy of the Black Mountain College through

freewillastrology ARIES (March 21-April 19)

I vividly remember seeing singer Diamanda Galas in concert. Though classically trained, she didn’t confine herself to mellifluous melodies and elegant tones. She was a whirlwind of elemental sound, veering from animalistic bellows to otherworldly chants to operatic glossolalia. It was all very entertaining, and often enjoyable. The skill with which she shaped the sound as it escaped her body was prodigious. My companion and I agreed that “she made your ears convulse and your eyes writhe and your skin prickle — but in a good way.” How would you feel about inviting some similar experiences into your life, Aries? The astrological omens suggest this would be an excellent time to seek the rowdy healing that only disciplined wildness can provide.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

Here’s a haiku-like poem by Cor van den Heuvel: “the little girl / hangs all the ornaments / on the nearest branch.” My comment: It’s cute that the girl crams all the decorations onto one small section of the tree, and maybe her parents will keep them that way. But I recommend that you take a different approach as you work to beautify and enliven your environment. Spread out your offerings; distribute your blessings equally; make sure that everything in need of invigoration gets what it requires.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

This is a good time to go in search of any secrets you’ve been hiding from yourself. I suggest you also try to track down the “missing links” that aren’t really missing but rather are neglected. My advice is similar for the supposedly “lost treasure” you’re wondering about: Clues about its whereabouts are lying around in full view for anyone who is innocent enough to see them. P.S. Being uncomplicated isn’t normally your strong suit, but this is one of those rare times when you’ll have an aptitude for it.

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

In the TV comedy series “Arrested Development,” Buster Bluth was an adult character who was a bit over-attached to his mother. It seemed to have to do with the fact that he lingered in her womb for 11 months before agreeing to be born. The obstetrician claimed “there were claw marks on her uterus.” I want to be sure you don’t make a comparable misstep in the coming weeks, Cancerian. It really is time for you to come out and play. Ready or not, leave your protective sanctuary and leap into the jangly, enchanting tumult.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

I have imaginary friends who help me. And yes, they sometimes even give me ideas for your horoscopes. Are you OK with that? Among the many other perks my secret buddies provide, they show me where my cell phone and car keys are when I’ve misplaced them — a prime

sign of their practical value. What’s your current status in regards to imaginary friends, Leo? Do you even have any? This would be an excellent time to seek them out and put them to work. In fact, I encourage you to do anything that might attract the input of undiscovered allies, behind-the-scenes collaborators, mysterious guidance, and divine assistance.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

Might there be a message for you in the mist on the window? Can you find a clue to the next phase of your destiny by scanning a newspaper that the wind blows against your leg as you’re walking? Be alert for the undertones, Virgo. Tune in to the subtexts. Scan the peripheries for the future as it reveals itself a little early. You never know when the hidden world might be trying to slip you a tip. You should be alert for the deeper storylines weaving themselves just below the level where the supposedly main plot is unfolding.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

A musician who records under the name of Shamantis took Justin Bieber’s silly pop tune “U Smile,” and slowed it down 800 percent. The new work was a 35-minute-long epic masterpiece of ambient electronica that The New York Times praised as “ghostly” and “oceanic.” More than two million people tuned in to hear it on the Internet. Might there be a comparable transformation in your future, Libra? From an astrological perspective, it’s prime time for you to transform a pedestrian exercise into a transcendent excursion, or a trivial diversion into an elegant inspiration, or a meaningless entertainment into a sublime learning opportunity.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

More than a few wildlife films use deception to fool the audiences into thinking they’re watching animals in the wild. So says Chris Palmer, a producer of many such films. “One classic trick involves hiding jellybeans in carcasses,” he told New Scientist. “If you see a bear feeding on a dead elk in a film, you can be pretty sure that the bear was hired from a game farm and is looking for sweets hidden in the carcass by the film-makers.” I suspect you will encounter a metaphorically comparable ruse or switcheroo sometime soon, Scorpio. It’ll be your job to be an enforcer of authenticity. Be on the lookout for the jellybeans.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

My favorite news source, The Onion, reported on a proposed law that would prohibit marriage between any two people who don’t actually love each other (Onion.com/LoveLaw). Couples whose unions are rooted in mutual antipathy or indifference are of course protesting the plan, insisting that they have as much of a right to wed as those who care for each other deeply and treat each other tenderly. Whether or not this proposal becomes a formal part of the legal system, Sagittarius, I urge you to embrace it. In fact, I’ll go so far as to ask

you not to do anything at all unless you are at least somewhat motivated by love. The coming months will be a time when your success will depend on your ability to rise to new heights of compassion, romance, eros, tenderness, empathy, and affection.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

Let’s imagine we’re fifth-century monks living in the land that today is known as the south of France. And let’s say we decide we’re going to build a chapel in a place that has long been a pagan shrine dedicated to the moon goddess Selene. Shouldn’t we consider the possibility that our new house of worship may be imbued with the vibes of the previous sanctuary? Won’t our own spiritual aspirations be colored by those of the people who for hundreds of years poured forth their devotions? Now shift your attention to the present day, and apply our little thought experiment to what’s going on in your life. Tune in to the influences that may be conditioning the new thing you’d like to create.

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AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

I would like to steal your angst, Aquarius. I fantasize about sneaking into your room tonight, plucking your nightmares right out of the heavy air, and spiriting them away. I imagine sidling up to you on a crowded street and pickpocketing your bitterness and frustration — maybe even pilfering your doubts, too. I wouldn’t keep any of these ill-gotten goods for myself, of course. I wouldn’t try to profit from them in any way. Instead, I would donate them to the yawning abyss, offer them up to the stormy ocean, or feed them to a bonfire on a primal beach. P.S. Even though I can’t personally accomplish these things, there is now a force loose in your life that can. Are you willing to be robbed of things you don’t need?

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

In 2011, I bet that memory won’t play as big a role in your life as it has up until now. I don’t mean to say that you will neglect or forget about the past. Rather, I expect that you will be less hemmed in by the consequences of what happened way back when. You’ll be able to work around and maybe even transcend the limitations that the old days and the old ways used to impose on you. Your free will? It will be freer than maybe it has ever been. Your creative powers will override the inertia of how things have always been done.

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mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 45

permanent collections, educational activities and public programs. Info: 3508484, bmcmac@bellsouth. net or www.blackmountaincollege.org. • Through SA (2/5) Paintings by Don Alter and W.P. “Pete” Jennerjahn. Blue Spiral 1 The gallery at 38 Biltmore Ave. is open Mon.-Sat., 10am-6pm. Info: 251-0202 or www.bluespiral1.com. • Through FR (12/31) - Milestones: Blue Ridge Parkway, an exhibition by 20 regional artists; “animal imagery earthenware” by Ron Meyers; and figurative ceramic sculpture by Donna Polseno. Echo Gallery 8 Town Square Blvd., Suite 160, Biltmore Park in Asheville. Hours: Thurs.Sun., Noon-6pm. Info: www.echoasheville.com or 687-7761. • WE (12/15), 6pm - Artist Leo Monahan will give an informal talk about his work and the current exhibition on display. • Through WE (12/15) - 12 Days of Christmas, an exhibition of paper sculptures by artist Leo Monahan. Flood Gallery Events Located in the Phil Mechanic building at 109 Roberts St. in Asheville’s River Arts District. Info: 254-2166 or www.floodgallery.org. • Through SA (1/8) - The Birds On Acid, work by Aaron Sizemore. Haen Gallery

Located at 52 Biltmore Ave., downtown Asheville. Hours: Mon.-Fri., 10am6pm, Sat., 11am-6pm and Sun., Noon-5pm. Info: 254-8577 or www.thehaengallery.com. • Through MO (1/31) Wintertide, a rotating group exhibit of works from many of The Haen Gallery artists. Haywood County Arts Council The HCAC sponsors a variety of art-related events in Waynesville and Haywood County. Unless otherwise noted, showings take place at HCAC’s Gallery 86 (86 North Main St.) in Waynesville. Hours: Mon.-Sat., 10am-5pm. Info: 452-0593 or www. haywoodarts.org. • Through FR (12/31) - It’s a Small, Small Work 2010, featuring artwork 12” or smaller by more than 100 artists from the Blue Ridge National Heritage Area in N.C. Miya Gallery Located at 20 N. Main St., Weaverville. Info: 6589655 or www.miyagallery. com. • Through FR (12/31) - Art by Simone Wilson will be on display. Oconaluftee Institute for Cultural Arts Located at 70 Bingo Loop in Cherokee. Info: 4973945. • Through FR (12/17) - The December Student Show will be on display. Seven Sisters Gallery This Black Mountain gallery is located at 117 Cherry St. Hours: Mon.-Sat., 10am-

6pm and Sun., Noon-5pm. Info: 669-5107 or www. sevensistersgallery.com. • Through MO (3/28) Earth and Water, oil paintings by Martha Kelley. Toe River Arts Council The TRAC Center Gallery is at 269 Oak Ave. in Spruce Pine. Hours: Tues.-Sat., 10am-5pm. The Burnsville TRAC Gallery is at 102 W. Main St. Hours: Mon.-Sat., 10am-5pm. Spruce Pine info: 765-0520. Burnsville info: 682-7215. General info: www.toeriverarts.org. • Through MO (1/3) - Artistree in the Home Winter Show in Burnsville. More than 50 WNC regional artists are showcased in a contemporary living room interior featuring handmade wood furnishings, iron wrought lamps, candlesticks, clay and glass sculptures, textile pillows, paintings and more. Transylvania Community Arts Council Located at 349 S. Caldwell St., Brevard. Hours: Mon.Fri., 10am-4pm. Info: 884-2787 or www.artsofbrevard.org. • Through FR (12/17) - Santa’s Palette Holiday Show. Vadim Bora Gallery At 30 1/2 Battery Park Ave. Info: 254-7959 or www. vadimborastudio.com. • Through FR (12/17) - Selected works by Mountain Sculptors. This annual exhibition features 16 professional sculptors in the WNC region. WCU Exhibits

Unless otherwise noted, exhibits are held at the Fine Art Museum, Fine & Performing Arts Center on the campus of Western Carolina University. Hours: Mon.-Fri., 10am-4pm & Thurs. 10am-7pm. Free, but donations welcome. Info: 227-3591 or www. fineartmuseum.wcu.edu. • Through FR (12/17) - Worldviews: A Year of the Collections. Highlighting selections from the permanent collection and new acquisitions to include recent gifts by regional, national and international artists. • Through FR (12/17) - Reclaiming Cultural Ownership: Challenging Indian Stereotypes, an installation of photographs and commercial merchandise focusing on “unlearning” stereotypes and fostering Native pride by noted Eastern Band of Cherokee Indian artist Shan Goshorn. • Through FR (12/17) - Seeing Rural Appalachia, an exhibition of photographs by Mike Smith.

More Art Exhibits & Openings Art at PULP Located underneath the Orange Peel at 101 Biltmore Ave., Asheville. Info: www.pulpasheville. com. • Through MO (1/31) Paintings by Asheville artist Brian Haynes. Art at the N.C. Arboretum Works by members of the Asheville Quilt Guild

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46 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

and regional artists are on display daily in The Visitor Education Center. Info: 665-2492 or www.ncarboretum.org. • Through MO (2/28) - Emissaries of Peace: The 1762 Cherokee and British Delegations, an exhibition on display in the Baker Center. Art at West Asheville Library • Through MO (1/31) - A multimedia exhibition by local artist Mimi Harvey will be on display at West Asheville Library, 942 Haywood Road. Info: 2504750. Clingman Cafe Located at 242 Clingman Ave. in the River Arts District. • Through FR (12/31) - Peace + Joy + Love = Art. The show will feature the work of local artists Dawn Dalto, Les Powell, Heather Tinnaro and Melissa Weiss. Laurel Chapter of the Embroiderers’ Guild of America Holds monthly meetings and smaller groups dedicated to teaching different types of needlework. The chapter is also involved in numerous outreach projects. Guests are always welcome at meetings. Info: 654-9788 or www.egacarolinas.org. • Through FR (12/31) - The chapter is celebrating the holiday season with a holiday-themed exhibit of hand-stitched items on display at the Henderson County Library.

Mountain Xpress Holiday Art Show • Through SU (12/19) - The Mountain Xpress Holiday Art Show, an exhibition featuring holiday-inspired art made by Xpress readers, will be on display at the Grove Arcade, Suite 143. Push Skate Shop & Gallery Located at 25 Patton Ave. between Stella Blue and the Kress Building. Info: 225-5509 or www.pushtoyproject.com. • Through MO (1/31) - Birdsong, new drawings, paintings and installation by David Hale.

Classes, Meetings & Arts-Related Events Collage Mandala Class (pd.) 2nd Floor Wedge. River Arts District, 129 Roberts Street. $100 includes 2 classes/all materials/one painting. • Registration/information, call Amy at LangeArt, (630) 200-9410 for details! The Painting Experience (pd.) Experience the power of process painting with Stewart Cubley as described in the groundbreaking book Life, Paint & Passion: Reclaiming the Magic of Spontaneous Expression. • January 2123 in Atlanta and February 18-20 in Chapel Hill. (888) 639-8569. www.processarts.com Mountain Made Located in the Grove Arcade in downtown Asheville. Features the works of regional artisans, writers and musicians.

Info: 350-0307 or mtnmade807@aol.com. • THURSDAYS through SATURDAYS, 10am-6pm & SUNDAYS, Noon-5pm - Glass blowing demonstrations. New Meetup of The Artists Way • Julia Cameron’s popular 12-step program to help artists and artist-want-tobes get unblocked will start in mid January. If interested in being a part of this support group, call (865) 964-5616. The Fine Arts League of the Carolinas Located at 362 Depot St. in the River Arts District. Info: 252-5050 or www. fineartsleague.org. • TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS, 7-9pm - Open figure drawing sessions. Four 5-minute poses and four 20-minute poses. $5.

Spoken & Written Word Asheville Storytelling Circle A nonprofit dedicated to excellence in the oral tradition that affirms various cultures through storytelling, and nourishes the development of emerging and established artists. Guests and new members always welcome. Info: 274-1123. • 3rd MONDAYS, 7pm - Tellers and listeners are invited to come to Asheville Terrace Lobby, 200 Tunnel Road. Attention WNC Mystery Writers

WNC Mysterians critique group. For serious mystery/suspense/thriller writers. Info: 712-5570 or wncmysterians.org. • TH (12/16), 6pm Meeting at Books-a-Million (lounge area), Tunnel Road, Asheville. Blue Ridge Books Located at 152 S. Main St., Waynesville. Info: www. brbooks-news.com or 456-6000. • FR (12/17), 7-8:30pm - Celebrate the release of Eric Brown’s book War of the Worlds plus Blood, Guts, and Zombies. A Q&A session and book signing will follow. • SA (12/18), 2-2:30pm Children are invited to meet Sequoia, a golden retriever who teaches core values of character education in Florida. Come and listen to Sequoia’s new book Do You Want to Be My Friend? —- 6:30-8:30pm - Michael Pilgrim will perform “fancy fiddling and swinging-mandolin jazz” tunes. Buncombe County Public Libraries LIBRARY ABBREVIATIONS - Each Library event is marked by the following location abbreviations: n BM = Black Mountain Library (105 N. Dougherty St., 250-4756) n FV = Fairview Library (1 Taylor Road, 250-6484) n WV = Weaverville Library (41 N. Main Street, 250-6482) n Library storyline: 250KIDS. • TU (12/14), 1pm - The Christmas Letters by Lee

Smith. LE —- 4pm - Hula Hoop Jam: Open to all teens and adults who hula hoop. BM. •WE (12/15), 5-7pm - Library Knitters meet. A casual knitting and needlework group for all skill levels. SW. • TH (12/16), 7pm - Book Club: Mudbound by Hillary Jordan. FV. •FR (12/17), 4-5:30pm - Harry Potter Yule Ball. Teens ages 11-18 are invited to dress up as their favorite Harry Potter. Snacks provided. WV. Events at Accent on Books The bookstore is located at 854 Merrimon Ave. Events are free and open to the public. Info: 252-6255 or www.accentonbooks.com. • FR (12/17), 6pm - Patti Digh will sign copies of her book Creative is a Verb. Events at City Lights City Lights Bookstore is at 3 E. Jackson St. in downtown Sylva. Info: 586-9499 or more@citylightsnc.com. • TH (12/16), 10:30am - Coffee with the Poet: Laura Hope Gill, author of Soul Tree. Events at Malaprop’s The bookstore and cafe at 55 Haywood St. hosts visiting authors for talks and book signings. Info: 254-6734 or www.malaprops.com. • TH (12/16), 7pm - Stitch-N-Bitch. Bring your current projects and talk shop with fiber artist Stacey Budge-Kamison. • SU (12/19), 3pm Susan Runholt will discuss and sign copies of her young-adult book series. • MO (12/20), 7pm Comix Club: Fun Home by Alison Bechdel. Hosted by Gina Marie Cole. Writers’ Workshop Events WW offers a variety of classes and events for beginning and experienced writers. Info: 254-8111 or www.twwoa.org. • Through TH (12/30) - 22nd annual Memoirs Competition.

Music Blue Ridge Ringers A five-octave auditioned community handbell ensemble based in Hendersonville. Concerts are free to attend. Info: 692-4910. • SU (12/19), 4pm - A concert of Christmas music will be performed at Biltmore United Methodist Church in Asheville. Love offerings encouraged. Events at City Lights

City Lights Bookstore is at 3 E. Jackson St. in downtown Sylva. Info: 586-9499 or more@citylightsnc.com. • MO (12/20), 7pm - The bass and accordion duo Slim Christmas and Yuletide Carol will perform in the store’s Regional Room. Events at First Baptist Church Located at 5 Oak St. (corner of Charlotte St. and I-240) in downtown Asheville. Info: www.fbca. net or 252-4781. • SU (12/19), 7-8pm - “Images of Christmas.” Experience the wonder of Christmas through a festival of carols offered by the First Baptist Church of Asheville Adult Choir and Symphony Orchestra, accented by multimedia art presented by renowned “Art to Heart” ministries. Haywood Community Band Concerts are presented at the Maggie Valley Pavilion, adjacent to the Maggie ValleyTown Hall, and are free to attend. Bring a picnic dinner. Info: 452-5553 or 452-7530 or www.haywoodcommunityband.org. • THURSDAYS, 7pm - Rehearsals at Grace Episcopal Church, 394 N. Haywood St., Waynesville. All interested concert band musicians are welcome to attend. Land of the Sky Chorus For men age 12 and older. Info: www.ashevillebarbershop.com or 768-9303. • TUESDAYS, 7:30pm - Open Rehearsals at Emmanuel Lutheran Church, 51 Wilburn Pl. Music at First Presbyterian Church of Weaverville • SU (12/19), 2pm The Brio Concert Series presents “A Classical Christmas Concert.” A reception and a meet-andgreet with the artists will follow. $10 suggested donation. Located at 30 Alabama Ave. Info: 3197077 or 645-7344. Music on the Rock Concert Series Presented by Flat Rock Playhouse, 2661 Greenville Hwy. in Flat Rock. The concerts will span Broadway, country, bluegrass, pop and rock favorites. $20/concert. Tickets & info: 693-0731, (866) 732-8008 or www. flatrockplayhouse.org. • SU (12/19) & MO (12/20), 8pm - Flat Rock Playhouse Family Christmas: An evening of entertainment with the resident Flat Rock Playhouse

consciousparty

fun fundraisers

Why: Pastyme, an a cappella and vocal group based in Asheville, presents a concert of holiday classics for Advent, Christmas and Epiphany. “Even though Pastyme has its roots in the sacred and secular music of the High Renaissance,” as stated on pastyme.org, “the group performs a cappella music from a wide variety of literature, [as well as] classical [music and] jazz.”

What: Pastyme, an a cappella ensemble, performs a benefit concert for the Church of the Advocate Where: Trinity Episcopal Church, 60 Church St. in Asheville When: Sunday. Dec. 19, 5 p.m. (Donations strongly encouraged. Info: 253-9361 or info@pastyme.org)

All proceeds from this special holiday presentation will benefit Church of the Advocate. According to the ministry’s mission statement, the organization is “dedicated to serving the homeless, the vulnerable and the street people of Asheville and Buncombe County.” Immerse yourself in the sounds of the season while supporting an organization dedicated to serving those in need.

benefitscalendar Calendar for December 15 - 23, 2010 “Box and Beer Food Drive” • TH (12/16), 6-8pm - Guests are asked to bring a box of nonperishable food to donate to families in need. Each person ages 21 and over will receive a free beer. The event is family-friendly and features live music from the Hack Birds with Julie Harrison. Held at White Horse Black Mountain, 105C Montreat Road. Food will be donated to Swannanoa Valley Christian Ministries for distribution. Info: 669-0816. Door Decorating Contest on Biltmore Avenue • Through MO (12/20) - Judge the decorated doors of local businesses on Biltmore Avenue, in downtown Asheville. The doors may be judged by patrons visiting the establishments and donations will be accepted in designated paint cans, with all proceeds benefiting Mission Children’s Hospital. Info: 254-2668. Holiday Restorative Yoga to Benefit MANNA FoodBank

• TH (12/16), 6-7:30pm - One Center Yoga will host three Restorative Yoga & Yoga Nidra classes with Kaoverii Weber. No prior yoga experience needed. $5-$25 suggested donation per class. Participants may also bring a nonperishable food item. Proceeds benefit MANNA. Registration & info: 225-1904 or sarah@onecenteryoga. com. Trinity Episcopal Church Trinity Episcopal Church, 60 Church Street, Asheville. Info: 253-9361. • SU (12/19), 5pm - A benefit concert will be performed by the a cappella group Pastyme. All proceeds from the concert benefit the Church of the Advocate, “dedicated to serving the homeless, the vulnerable and the street people of Asheville and Buncombe County.” Music for Advent, Christmas and Epiphany will be included. Info: info@ Pastyme.org. or call 253-9361. WNC Jewish Federation Benefit

Info: www.jewishasheville.org. • SA (12/18), 8pm - Singer/songwriter Peter Himmelman will perform a benefit concert at The Orange Peel, 101 Biltmore Ave. Local blues and soul band Skinny Legs and All opens. $18. •SU (12/19), 8pm - Havdalah and “Jews, Blues, and Rock & Roll,” a discussion featuring guest speaker Scott Benarde, author or Stars of David-Jewish Rock and Roll Stories, at the Doubletree Biltmore Hotel. $10/$6 students.

MORE BENEFITS EVENTS ONLINE

Check out the Benefits Calendar online at www.mountainx. com/events for info on events happening after December 23.

CALENDAR DEADLINE

The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication. Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 365

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vagabonds and their families. $20. Song O’ Sky Chorus (Sweet Adelines International) The chorus is always looking for women 18+ who want to learn how to sing barbershop harmony. Please visit a rehearsal. Info: 1-866-824-9547 or www.songosky.org. • MONDAYS, 6:45pm - Rehearsal at Reed Memorial Baptist Church on Fairview Road. (enter parking lot on Cedar St.). Guests welcome. St. Matthias Musical Performances These classical music concerts take place at St. Matthias Episcopal Church in Asheville, 1 Dundee St. (off South Charlotte). Info: 252-0643. • SU (12/19), 3pm Donna Robertson will play her own arrangements of Christmas Carols on piano. A free-will offering for the St. Matthias restoration fund will be taken. WNC Musicians Meetup Open Mic Nights • MO (12/20), 6-9pm-ish - Come listen or perform at a holiday open mic at Skinny Beats Drum Shop, 4 Eagle St., downtown Asheville. Love donations appreciated. Info: www. wncmusiciansmeetup.com or 776-3786. YT Revolution Performance • WE (12/22), 2pm - YT Revolution, the YouTheatre of Flat Rock Playhouse’s new show choir, will perform at the Kanuga Conference Center in Hendersonville. Info: lauren@flatrockplayhouse.org or 693-3517.

Theater Adult and Youth (15+) Core Technique Acting Programs (pd.) The Stella Adler Studio of Acting, WNC’s only professional acting studio and an extension of Stella Adler NYC, is now accepting interviews for its Spring Adult and Youth (15+) Core Technique Acting Programs. To schedule an interview call ACT (828) 254-1320. www.stellaadler-asheville. com ArtSpace Charter School Productions ArtSpace Charter School is a K-8 public charter school located at 2030 US Hwy. 70 in Swannanoa. Info: 298-2787 or www. artspacecharter.org. • WE (12/15), 6pm - The sixth grade class will perform The Merry Wives of Windsor and The

48 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Imaginary Invalid, written by the French classical playwright Moliere. Seventh and eighth grade students designed and built the sets and costumes during their electives. Free, but donations will be accepted. Asheville Community Theatre All performances are at 35 East Walnut St. Info & reservations: 254-1320 or www.ashevilletheatre.org. • TH (12/16) through SA (12/18), 7:30pm & SU (12/19), 2:30pm - The Santaland Diaries, written by David Sedaris, starring Tom Chalmers. Recommended for mature audiences. $15. • SA (12/18), 10am Saturdays at ACT Family Theatre Series presents Once Upon a Time —- Noon - A Dickens Tale. Performances by Bright Star Touring Theatre. Tickets are $5 and will be available at the door. Black Mountain Center for the Arts Located in the renovated Old City Hall at 225 West State St. in Black Mountain. Gallery Hours: Mon.-Wed. & Fri., 10am-5pm (closed Sat. during winter months). Info: 669-0930 or www. BlackMountainArts.org. • FR & SA (12/17 & 18), 7:30pm - Rediscovering Christmas, a theater presentation by Acts of Renewal, a national touring company. Two actors portray a variety of characters in a series of vignettes that reinforce the real meaning of the holidays. $15. Flat Rock Playhouse The State Theater of North Carolina is on Hwy. 225, 3 miles south of Hendersonville. Info: 6930731 or www.flatrockplayhouse.org. • Through TH (12/23) - Live from WVL Radio Theatre: It’s A Wonderful Life will be performed at the Historic Henderson County Courthouse. $34. • Through TH (12/23) - A Christmas Carol, adapted by Christopher Schario and based on the story by Charles Dickens. Wed.Sat., 8pm; Wed., Thurs., Sat. & Sun., 2pm. $40. Montford Park Players Unless otherwise noted, performances are free and take place outdoors Fri.Sun. at 7:30 p.m. at Hazel Robinson Amphitheater in Montford. Bring folding chair and umbrella in case of rain. Donations accepted. Info: 254-5146 or www.montfordparkplayers.org.

• THURSDAYS (12/9) through SUNDAYS (12/19) - The 34th annual presentation of A Christmas Carol will be performed at the Masonic Temple, 80 Broadway. Shows being at 7:30pm with matinees at 2:30pm on Saturday, Dec. 18 and on Sunday, Dec. 19. $12/$10 students and seniors/$6 children. Thursday, Dec. 16 is “paywhat-we’re-worth night.”

Dance 7pm Wednesdays* • InterPlay Asheville (pd.) Play with us, and tap into body wisdom, with movement, reflection, voice, and 1 minute stories. It’s easy and Fun, plus, you can’t do it wrong! (Really!) $5-15. • At Friends Meeting House, 227 Edgewood Road, 28804, near UNCA, across from Ivy Street. (* Except the first Wednesday.) www.interplayasheville. org Asheville International Folk Dancers • TUESDAYS, 7-9:30pm We do a variety of dances from all over the world, but mainly line dances from Eastern Europe, particularly the Balkans. At Harvest House, 205 Kenilworth Road, Asheville. No partner, no cost. Info: 6451543 or mmgoodman@ frontier.com. Asheville Movement Collective AMC hosts weekly dancewaves for personal and community transformation. First wave is free. Info: www.DanceAMC.org. • FRIDAYS, 7-9pm - Meet at the Terpsicorps Studio of Dance, above The Wedge in the River Arts District. $5. • SUNDAYS, 8:30-10:30 am & 10:30am-12:30pm - Meet at Studio 11, 11 Richland St. in West Asheville. $5. English Country Dance Dance to live music with a caller. This style of dance may be seen in movie adaptations of Jane Austen novels. $6/$5 for Old Farmers Ball members. Info: 230-8449. • 1st & 3rd SUNDAYS, 3-5:30pm - Dance at the Asheville Arts Center, 308 Merrimon Ave. Wear comfortable clothes and soft sole shoes. Southern Lights SDC A nonprofit square-dance club. Square dancing is friendship set to music. Info: 694-1406 or 6811731.

• SA (12/18) - Holiday dance at the Whitmire Activity Building on Lily Pond Road, Hendersonville. Dinner and meeting for clubmembers at 5pm. No advanced dance. Early rounds at 7pm. Squares and rounds at 7:30pm. Holiday attire requested.

Waynesville Parks and Recreation Info: 456-2030 or recprograms@townofwaynesville.org. • FR (12/17), 7-9pm - A School Dance for students in grades 3-5 will be held. There will be pizza, drinks and a dance contest. $5. Winter World Dance Showcase • WE (12/15), 7:309:30pm - The showcase, featuring bellydance, Bhangra, Bollywood, hip-hop, Michael Jacksoninspired moves and more, will be held at the Masonic Lodge, 80 Broadway. $10 in advance/$12 at the door. Info: www.lisazahiya.com.

Auditions & Call to Artists Appalachian Mountain Photography Competition • Through FR (12/17) - Deadline for submissions. Cash prizes will be awarded and selected works will hang in exhibition at the Turchin Center for the Visual Arts in Boone. To enter or for more info: www.appmtnphotocomp. org. Flat Rock Playhouse The State Theater of North Carolina is on Hwy. 225, 3 miles south of Hendersonville. Info: 6930731 or www.flatrockplayhouse.org. • WE (12/15), 4:30pm & FR (12/17), 6pm - The YouTheatre of Flat Rock Playhouse will host auditions for The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, which will be staged in March. The main roles are concentrated toward middle school/high school students and adults. However, the ensemble and folk travelers are open to actors of all ages. Technical assistants are also needed: YT@flatrockplayhouse.org.

CALENDAR DEADLINE

The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication. Questions? Call (828)2511333, ext. 365

edgymama

parenting from the edge by Anne Fitten Glenn

Pay discrimination — working moms pay the price Women working full-time, year-round earn about 77 cents for every dollar earned by men in the same positions. Yes, that’s in 2010 — 46 years after President Kennedy signed the Equal Pay Act (EPA) into law, making gender pay disparity illegal (data courtesy of The National Women’s Law Center and MomsRising.org). To add insult to injury, a month ago, the Paycheck Fairness Act, which would expand damages under the EPA and help show employers how to get rid of unfair pay, was defeated in the U.S. Senate. This makes me spitting mad. There is no equal pay for equal work in this country. Not only are women still low on the pay totem pole, but moms, single moms, and minority women are even lower. We’re the dirt under the pole. To wit: women without children typically make up to 90 cents to a man’s dollar. Mothers make 73 to 77 cents to a man’s dollar. Single moms make 56-66 cents to a man’s dollar. African American women earned just 63 cents for every man’s dollar, and Hispanic women earned only 52 cents to that man’s dollar. Now I’m beyond spitting — I’m madder than a nest of hornets — that’s just been stomped on by a man. And I adore men (for the most part). I can’t blame most of you guys for this inexorable state of

affairs. But I can blame those men who wield the world’s remote controls, including the Senators who voted against the PFA. You may try to tell me that this inequality reflects women’s choices; such as the one I made 13 years ago, which was to work only part-time in order stay home with my kids. But that’s not the case. “In fact, recent authoritative studies show that even when all relevant career and family attributes are taken into account, there is still a significant, unexplained gap in men’s and women’s earnings,” per the National Women’s Law Center’s pay equity fact sheet. So that leaves basic gender discrimination as the culprit. And prejudice against women who choose to procreate and/or fall into the minority categories. And it’s not based on education or socio-economic status — the pay gap persists across all levels (or lack of levels). In fact, while earning a bachelor’s degree yields a median annual of income of $38,221 for women, it gives men, on average, $55,425 per year. That’s just patently wrong. So what now? How do we redress this discrimination and illegality? Especially now that The Payment Fairness Act’s been dissed by the people

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we elected? Oh yeah, Senators, FYI, more than half of this country’s work force is now women. This is the first time in the history of the U.S. that working women outnumber working men. And we can and will vote. I guess that’s the answer. N.C. Senator Kay Hagan voted for the act, while our other Senator, Richard Burr, voted against it. Yep, Hagan has ovaries, and Burr has, well, male apparatus. I’m sure he also probably has some song and dance about why something in the act was inappropriate

for his constituency. Or it could just be that big “R” after his name that influenced his “no” vote. At this time, it’s not clear whether or not the PFA can be revived or not in a slightly different form. But something has to be done to hold employers accountable for gender pay discrimination. I don’t accept this inequality. Do you? X Anne Fitten “Edgy Mama” Glenn writes about a number of subjects, including parenting, at www. edgymama.com.

parentingcalendar Calendar for December 15 - 23, 2010 La Leche League of Asheville • 3rd MONDAYS, 7pm - Monday Evenings: Meeting at Awakening Heart, Merrimon Ave. Pregnant moms, babies and toddlers welcome. Info: 242-1548 or 713-7089. Parenting Classes at Pardee Hospital All classes are held at Pardee Hospital, in the orientation classroom, 800 N. Justice St. in Hendersonville. Free, but registration is required. Info: (866)-790-WELL. • TH (12/16), 6:30-8pm - “The Art of Breastfeeding,” a class on breastfeeding for new moms —- 6:30-8pm - “Daddy Duty.” Helpful ideas and tips for dads during the labor and birth process.

Professional Parenting Open House • 1st & 3rd MONDAYS - Professional Parenting Open House. Adoption Plus is now recruiting families. To learn more, join us at 38 Garfield St., Suite B, Asheville. Info: 236-2877.

MORE PARENTING EVENTS ONLINE

Check out the Parenting Calendar online at www.mountainx. com/events for info on events happening after December 23.

CALENDAR DEADLINE

The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication. Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 365

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Fresh and hot: Allison Gulick holds a tray of Beans and Berries bagels, fresh out of the oven. Photos by Jonathan Welch

by Mackensy Lunsford Some say it’s in the water, and some say it’s simply a precise science that people from down South fail to grasp. Whatever it is that makes New York bagels so good, frankly, is in short supply in these parts. Since New York Bagel and Deli on Merrimon closed (and Harry’s Bagels before it), area cafés and restaurants have had little in the way of local sources for the classic nosh — at least the version similar to what’s found in the myriad delis of the Big Apple. If you’ve lived in Asheville long enough, you may remember that the (sadly defunct) Gold Hill Espresso and Fine Teas used to serve a good bagel. The bialys that Gold Hill used to ship from the North were so hard to keep in-house that people would call the café to reserve them.

50 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

These days, even our favorite local haunts don’t know where to turn for the real deal. The Green Sage sources theirs from Sysco, and Greenlife no longer offers single bagels in their deli section (an employee of the market said that they are looking for a provider, however). A number of Asheville’s coffee shops buy their bagels from Bruegger’s Bagels, including Clingman Café, the Dripolator, Firestorm Café, Izzy’s, Malaprop’s and Over Easy, according to a Bruegger’s shift manager who declined to give her full name. What she would divulge, however, is her recipe for bagel success. “If it’s not boiled, it’s not a bagel, I can tell you that,” she said. Though the dough for Bruegger’s Bagels is ordered from an outside source, it is boiled and baked in-house, at least at the Asheville loca-

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Hard lox: Tod’s Tasties on Montford may have the most authentic New York-style bagel of all the locally made products. tion. So, are Bruegger’s bagels comparable to a New York bagel? “From what I understand, yes. Many people who have moved to this area from New York and various places up north definitely say that we have the best bagels in town,” says our Bruegger’s source. The lack of WNC-made bagels is no fault of coffee-shop owners (without on-site kitchens). In fact, when contacted, Firestorm, Over Easy and Clingman noted that Bruegger’s is the only wholesale source they know of for bagels. The bakeries that have the space to make their own hold tight to them once they come out of the oven, at least for the time being. Xpress recently hit the town to find out what the local guys are doing with our favorite breakfast fodder. Even if a true New York-style bagel is pretty tough to come by around here, it’s nice to know there are local sources to support. (Note:

52 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

these aren’t the only locally made bagels in town. West End Bakery in West Asheville makes them in-house, as does Farm and Sparrow bakery. Know of more? Go to mountainx.com and fill us in.)

Big-city flavor

Jesse Bardyn, head baker at City Bakery, knows his bagels. Bardyn says that what he bakes is very much along the lines of a New York-style bagel. “A classic bagel is boiled, then baked, and ours are made in that classic style.” All of City Bakery’s bagels, he says, are hand-cut and shaped, boiled, then baked in deck ovens with steam-injection systems. While his bagels aren’t exactly authentic Big Apple bagels, Bardyn says that people he “considers to be in the know” enjoy what he’s turning out. Made with King Arthur flour (milled in

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North Carolina), his bagels go through a twostep fermentation process. “You get a little bit more flavor that way,” says Bardyn. “I find that sometimes bagels just taste like flour, and don’t really have a lot of flavor. We’ve tried to change that a little bit,” he says. Bardyn’s bagels come in traditional flavors — plain, poppy, sesame, onion and wheat, for starters. Though they get approached often to provide bagels for local businesses, the City Bakery currently doesn’t have the space to honor all of the requests. “The problem is that you need a big kettle to boil them in, and I have to arrange four or five pots on the stove to get enough space,” says Bardyn. Bardyn, however, does let on that larger-scale bagel-making might be on the bakery’s agenda in the future. “We’re entertaining the idea,” he says. “All the bagel shops are gone now, and nobody’s really filled that spot.” Also? Bardyn makes bialys on occasion. Of course, the first thing on my mind is ... when can I come get one? “I’ve had multiple older Jewish men call me and harass me about it,” says Bardyn. “So, soon.”

It’s tasty at Tod’s Tod’s Tasties and To-Gos on Montford offers a truly great Yankee-fied breakfast sandwich for those who are sick of grits and biscuits. The chewy in-house-made bagel comes topped with lox, red onion, cream cheese, capers, tomato and lettuce for a hearty morning nosh. But, if you like your bagels spiked with all manner of onion flakes and what-not, this is not the place for you. Baker Laura Goetz lets the dough speak for itself, baking plain — and only plain — bagels. She mixes and shapes that dough, then lets it proof overnight so that it develops plenty of flavor. She uses much of the same method that Bardyn uses at the City Bakery — boil, then bake in the oven. Her equipment is a bit less advanced than that at the City Bakery; since there are no steam injection systems in this tiny kitchen, Goetz throws ice cubes in the baking trays. So, how close is a Tod’s bagel to a New York bagel? “Jacob (Sessoms), who owns this place, is from New York,” Goetz offers. You can definitely attribute the style of bagels that Tod’s serves to his tastes, she says. And how do those tastes translate to the actual

product? Goetz is coy: “We have a lot of people that come in and say that they love them and that they’re the best in town, but it’s all opinion.” Xpress is of the opinion that Tod’s serves a whole lot of tasty for a small amount of money, and suggests that the lox bagel offers a pretty screaming good value at $4.95.

A face-burner of a bagel

Though Paige Scully, co-owner of Beans and Berries, concedes that her eatery’s bagel dough is purchased from an outside source — food distribution giant Sysco — the bagels are still baked in-house — and turned into something special by the staff bakers. In contrast to Tod’s sparse repertoire of flavors, the Merrimon Avenue café turns out bagel concoctions like sun-dried tomato Parmesan, mozzarella-basil, Mediterranean bagels with feta and olives, and even the occasional seasonal special, like a fall bagel made with pumpkin pureé. “We do blueberry bagels where we actually poke blueberries in the dough,” says Scully. “They look different, but they’re really good.” Beans and Berries offers bagels that are the least New York style of the trio we sampled. The staff tries to get the boiled effect by adding ice cubes to the trays as the bagels bake. What they lack in chewy texture, they make up for in flavor, however. Of note is the spicy cheddar-jalapeño, which Scully calls “the bagel.” The jalapeño bagels vary in heat from batch to batch, she says, even though the staff adds the same amount of peppers to each one. The bagel that Scully provides as a sample is actually ferociously hot. “We also have a jalapeño cream cheese that people get to put on that,” she says, pointing to the bagel. They’re such a hit, says Scully, it’s hard to keep them in the case — which guarantees that the bagels are fresh every day. “It definitely became more than we anticipated. It can be hard to keep up,” she says. I ask Scully if she’s had anything that compares to a New York bagel in this area. “I mean, not really,” she says. “Nothing really does elsewhere in the world. But, for me, it’s really hard to go wrong with a bagel. Unless you’re getting Sara Lee.” X Mackensy Lunsford can be reached at food@ mountainx.com.

foodcalendar Calendar for December 15 - 23, 2010 Farm To Table Saturday Brunch — Grove Park Inn (pd.) Just $19.99. Join us 11:30am-2:30pm. Call 1-800438-5800 for reservations. www.groveparkinn.com “Box and Beer Food Drive” • TH (12/16), 6-8pm - Guests are asked to bring a box of nonperishable food to donate to families in need. Each person ages 21 and over will receive a free beer. The event is family-friendly and features live music from the Hack Birds with Julie Harrison. Held at White Horse Black Mountain, 105C Montreat Road. Food will be donated to

Swannanoa Valley Christian Ministries for distribution. Info: 669-0816.

MORE FOOD EVENTS ONLINE

Check out the Food Calendar online at www.mountainx. com/events for info on events happening after December 23.

CALENDAR DEADLINE

The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication. Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 365

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V isit us at www.franksromanpizza.com 54 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

If you would like to submit a food-related event for the Food Calendar, please use the online submission form found at: http://www.mountainx.com/events/submission. In order to qualify for a free listing, your event must cost no more than $40 to attend and be sponsored by and/or benefit a nonprofit. If an event benefits a business, or cost more than $40, you’ll need to submit a paid listing: 251-1333.

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 55

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Hoppin’ holidays: The Hop Ice Cream Company makes an ice-cream version of the classic yule log for a frozen twist on a traditional treat. Photos by Jonathan Welch

Holiday bites

The Hop Ice Cream Company is making Yule logs for Christmas. The confections are an ice cream take on a classic dessert, and are available for order through Wednesday, Dec. 22. The Hop makes their yule logs with jelly-roll cake from Creme Patisserie, which they roll with the customer’s choice of vanilla bean, butter pecan or peppermint stick ice cream. Then, the whole concoction is covered with dark chocolate ice cream and decorated to order. For $22.95 plus tax, the whole shebang serves up to a dozen. For more information about the Hop, visit hopicecreamcafe.com. Speaking of Creme, the Merrimon confectionary has a number of holiday specials of its own. Creme is turning out hot cross buns — sweet rolls baked with currants and spices and frosted with an “X.” They cost $10 for a half-dozen. The bakery also offers a number of pies — apple, pumpkin and the amazing-sounding Jack Daniels chocolate-pecan pie. Whole pies run $20 a piece, while cakes — salted caramel, double chocolate cheesecake and coconut cake — are $28. Holiday boxes and baskets, filled with an assortment of baked goods, are also available. According to co-owner Jitra Neal, a number of special breads will be available come Dec. 23, including focaccia, sesame butter bread and dinner rolls. Neal recommends preordering to ensure that certain items are available. More information at 350-9839. Creme is located at 640 Merrimon Ave., Suite 201.

56 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Creme isn’t the only bakery offering holiday breads. City Bakery offers pannetone and stollen. According to Brian Dennehy, City Bakery general manager, “Our pannetone is a traditional Italian holiday bread. It is a rich, sweet, sourdough flavored with vanilla bean and studded with dark chocolate.” Visit citybakery. net for more information. Marco’s Pizzeria is also getting ready for the holidays. The restaurant is serving up crowdsized portions of some of its classic Italian menu items for holiday entertaining. The special holiday menu features more than a dozen dishes, from antipasto platters to meatballs and baked pastas. Trays are available in half (serves 8) and full sizes (serves 16). Marco’s holiday menu includes: lasagna, baked ziti, pastas, Parmigiana (chicken or eggplant), sausage and peppers, meatballs and salads. Vegetarian options are available. Holiday menu orders should be placed at least 24 hours prior to pickup. Call Marco’s at 285-0709 (North) or 277-0004 (South). Both locations are closed on Mondays. For more information, visit marcos-pizzeria.com.

Calling all bakers

Through Friday, Dec. 17, Loving Food Resources Food Bank invites you to bake cookies to make a difference. Loving Food Resources will hold their 20th annual Holiday Cookie Party on Friday the 17th from 6 until 8 p.m. During that time, the organization will fill 125 cake boxes with homemade cookies and individually wrapped chocolates for their client’s holiday food box pick-up that weekend. The organization will also accept donations before the event.

xmaseats Seems like nearly everything is closed on Christmas, which is a good thing for the workers, at least. However, where is one to go when they’ve had their fill of family, want to get out of the house — or don’t celebrate Christmas to begin with? Traditionally, options generally tend toward greasy Chinese and fast food, but luckily there are some independent options. Here are a few, provided by the Asheville Independent Restaurant Association:

Christmas Eve Bistro 1896 (special holiday menu) bistro1896.com Blue Water Seafood (until 2 p.m.) bluewaterseafood.net Bouchon ashevillebouchon.com Chef Mo’s chefmo.com Chelsea’s Tea Room (open until 3 p.m.) City Bakery (open until 2 p.m.) citybakery.net Corner Kitchen (open until 3 p.m.) Fiore’s Ristorante Toscana fioresasheville.com Frankie Bones fbdining.com Gianni Panini giannipanini.net Green Sage thegreensage.net All Grove Park Inn restaurants groveparkinn.com Grovewood Cafe grovewoodcafe.com Jack of the Wood laughingseed.jackofthewood.com Laughing Seed Café (open until 3 p.m.) laughingseed.com Luella’s BBQ (open until 3 p.m.) luellasbarbeque.com Neo Cantina neocantina.com Olive or Twist oliveortwist.net Pomodoros pomodoroscafe.com Posana posanacafe.com The Lobster Trap thelobstertrap.biz Vincenzo’s vincenzos.com Vinnie’s Neighborhood Italian vinniesitalian.com Westville Pub westvillepub.com

Christmas Day Bistro 1896 (special holiday menu) Fiore’s Ristorante Toscana fioresasheville.com All Grove Park Inn restaurants groveparkinn.com Grovewood Cafe grovewoodcafe.com Olive or Twist oliveortwist.net Vincenzo’s vincenzos.com Know of others? Visit mountainx.com and let us know.

Bread basket: Jennifer Jacobs, co-owner of Creme Patiserrie, stands beside the bakery’s numerous holiday specialty items. Loving Food Resources is an all-volunteer food bank that serves people living with HIV/AIDS, as well those in hospice care. The organization is requesting that donors bring at least four dozen homemade cookies to help fill their gift boxes. The drop-off point (and cookie party location) is at the Social Hall of Kennilworth Presbyterian Church on the corner of Chiles Avenue and Kenilworth Road. For more information, and for early cookie drop off, contact Betty Sharpless at 254-8832.

The gift of food

How about a CSA for Christmas? It’s the kind of present any chef would love. Winter Sun Farms is a community supported agriculture program

that provides locally grown food all winter long. At the height of freshness, fruits and vegetables are processed and frozen at Blue Ridge Food Ventures and distributed throughout the cold months. Consumers purchase “winter shares” from Blue Ridge Food Ventures in advance of the growing season. The money is used to help area food growers purchase seeds and get their crops in the ground. Some farmers are certified organic; some are certified naturally grown. All of them grow sustainably and responsibly. Blue Ridge Food Ventures offers Winter Sun Farms gift certificates — the perfect size for stuffing stockings. For more information, visit wintersunfarmsnc.com.

X Send your food news to food@mountainx.com.

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mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 57

bartab Game on!

Asheville’s first arcade bar opens on College Street by Mackensy Lunsford

WEDNESDAYS: KARAOKE 9-2AM w/ SOUND EXTREME THURSDAYS: 60¢ BONELESS WINGS TUESDAYS: TRIVIA NIGHT 7-9PM w/ 45¢ WINGS ALL-DAY

Hey Asheville — ready to play the games of your youth while getting snookered on adult beverages? Want to play BurgerTime, Centipede and Asteroids, far, far away from the screaming rugrat-inhabited land of Chuck E. Cheese? Arcade Asheville opens Friday, Dec. 17, ready to capitalize on a nostalgia for all things ‘80s. During its construction in the Pack Square building vacated by Joli Rouge, marketing manager Kelly Gold and owners Joshua Aaron and Leonard Poe generated a bit of a buzz over the bar through an online and word-of-mouth marketing campaign. With a pretty appealing concept at the heart of the venture, Arcade Asheville nearly promotes itself. And people are talking. While arcade bars are already gaining traction elsewhere, this will be the first of its kind in Asheville. This version will offer a pretty slick juxtaposition of a jangling arcade atmosphere and the sleek

Drivin’ and shootin’: “’Lucky & Wild’ is the most fun game on the planet,” says Arcade’s Kelly Gold, seated at the game with owner Joshua Aaron. “It’s cheesy and ‘80s and fantastic.” Photo by Jonathan Welch

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58 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

decor it projects, says Gold. “We wanted this to be a really sexy bar so that it wasn’t just a cheesy arcade, but also a really cool hang out. We’ve tried to make everything really dark and really sexy.” True, even in the daytime, Arcade radiates sex appeal, boasting two open levels of swank and a lofty, urban vibe. There’s enough dark gray tones and stainless steel, concrete and glass to make Arcade feel sophisticated yet grittily modern, but it’s all brightened up with splashes of toned-down ‘80s aquas and pinks for a touch of throwback. Then throw in the games! The noise! Tokens and skeeball and jangling pinball and Super Mario at the bar! It’s hard not to regress a couple of decades and squee a bit with anticipation. Isn’t it going to be going to be a little ... well, loud, Xpress wonders? “Yes,” says Gold with a broad grin. “And Danny Kadar did the sound system (Kadar is a sound engineer and producer who’s worked with Band of Horses, My Morning Jacket and others). It sounds like this whole building is going to rattle apart, but in the warmest, most wonderful way.” It may even be a bit jarring to the senses once it’s all in full swing. There’s so much swank versus retro-cheese, noisy nerdy indulgence up against sophisticated, practiced cool. It’s just as easy to envision socialite types in the space as it is to imagine geeky hipsters

juking and jiving at the bar, game controllers in hand, fully immersed in the task of navigating Mario and Luigi through castles and caverns on the wide screens on the wall. Oh, yeah, that’s going to happen. “It will be fully wired with old-school Nintendo and all that stuff so that you can sit at the bar and play games,” says Aaron. Is that the result of the dreams of a barely recovered video game addict? Actually no. “I was never really into games growing up, so I feel like I’m kind of making up for lost time,” says Aaron. But mostly? He knows that his generation — some call it the “me” generation — just wants all their stuff back. “The kids that were playing these games in the ‘80s are now 30 and 40 years old,” he says. “They’ve got money now, and they want all of the stuff that mom cleaned out of the attic and threw out.” On top of that, they probably also want a drink. Arcade Asheville is located at 130 College St. in downtown Asheville. It will be open 7 days a week from 11 a.m. until late, offering light fare, wine, beer and liquor. Though Arcade will be family friendly during the day, it will be 21 and over after 9 p.m. For more information, visit the Arcade Asheville Facebook page. X Send your bar news to food@mountainx.com.

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mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 59

Y LOCAL

brewsnews

by anne fitten glenn

Local breweries making national news Wedge Brewing in the Times

Now Boldly Offered at:

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A recent article in the New York Times about Asheville’s River Arts District includes some information on the Wedge Brewing Company. The story, by Ingrid K. Williams, ends with this evocative paragraph: “Still, around 4 p.m., when the studios call it a day, off-duty artists and bearded residents reliably trickle into the Wedge to sip pints on the patio. Surrounded by sculptures made from reclaimed industrial scraps, it’s a fitting gathering spot for the River Arts District. And after a few rounds of Iron Rail IPA or caramel-scented Community Porter, the neighborhood’s rough edges fade into the twilight haze.” What, Asheville has bearded residents? So congrats to the Wedge, and thanks to master brewer Carl Melissas for bringing back that Community Porter. The delicious caroband maple syrup-flavored porter comes in at 7.4 percent alcohol per volume. That’s higher than a typical porter, so swill gently.

beerycalendar

Highland Brewing “one to watch”

Also, Highland Brewing, Asheville’s granddaddy brewery, was listed as one of “12 Breweries to Watch in 2011” by Draft Magazine. The story notes that “by the end of 2010, brewmaster and co-founder John Lyda will have cranked out 18,000 barrels, solidifying Highland’s hold as the Southeast’s third-largest beer producer.” I’m guessing the first two largest beer producers are Sweetwater Brewing out of Atlanta and Abita out of Abita Springs, La. But back to our local brewers. You know that Highland’s sexy new tasting room is open on Fridays from 4 until 8 p.m., right? Head out there for live local music and tastes of the stuff they’re cooking up in their new, experimental three-barrel system room at 12 Old Charlotte Highway. One other Blue Ridge mountain-based brewery also makes the Draft Magazine list: Devils

From the French Broad to the New York Times: Wedge Brewing, recently featured in an article on the River Arts District in the NYT, offering beers at Asheville’s 2010 Winter Warmer Beer Festival. The next Winter Warmer will be held Jan. 22. Photo by Anne Fitten Glenn

Saturday, Dec. 18

Cask of Cold Mountain Winter Ale at Brixx Pizza. I hear this is the last cask of Cold Mountain kicking around WNC, so if you haven’t tasted the ale in caskconditioned form, this is your chance. Brixx is located at 30 Town Square Blvd., brixxpizza.com.

Saturday, Dec. 18

Nantahala Brewing Company, Bryson City, N.C. Tasting room preview party. 6 p.m. Live music and discounted schwag. nantahalabrewingcompany.com

Thursday, Dec. 23

Bruisin’ Ales Pisgah Brewing Holiday Releases with Pisgah owner Jason Caughman. Free. Taste the 2010 Valdez Coffee Stout, Vortex I Tripel IPA, Vortex II Russian Imperial Stout and Baptista Belgian Noel. 66 Broadway. bruisin-ales. com

Saturday, Jan. 22

Asheville’s Fourth Annual Winter Warmer Beer Festival. This year, the festival will be held at the Civic Center’s exhibition hall, which has a capacity of 1,200 (more than its previous location at the Haywood Park Hotel ballroom). Backbone Brewing Company in Roseland, Va. After opening in 2008, “Devils Backbone unleashed four GABF-medal-winning beers in 2009, four in 2010, and snatched the title of small brewpub of the year at the World Beer Cup,” according to the story. That’s huge. Road trip to Roseland, anyone?

ABC infusor schedule

Come to Asheville Brewing to taste beers infused with fresh flavors. It’s different and fun. Here’s the plan for the rest of December:

60 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Dec.16: Starlight Mints and Christmas Jam Ale Dec 23: Mint, lemon, ginger and Shiva I.P.A. Dec 30: Fresh strawberries and Ninja Porter Fresh strawberries and silky porter in the dark of winter sounds lovely. X Send your brews news to Anne Fitten Glenn at brewgasmavl@gmail.com.

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arts&entertainment The Ghosts of Biltmores Past

Haunted tour offers a chilling glimpse into the century-old Village by Miles Britton “Back in 1916, a great flood happened here. The local legend is that the water rose up all the way to the point where you could only see the tip of the steeple of All Soul’s Church. Some of the people who had been trapped in the floodwaters found refuge by trying to cling onto the steeple at the top. Well, after the first few hours, people started getting tired. Some of the families who were up there, just out of fatigue, had to decide which one of their children to let go into the flood waters. Not a single person survived. “Supposedly, people hear thumping noises and see strange shadows around the top of the steeple to this day.” — Chris Sorrells, Haunted Biltmore tour Take a stroll through the Christmas-lightlined streets of Biltmore Village, and you’ll get your fair share of history. But alongside the tales of the Vanderbilts and the Roaring ‘20s, there are the stories that people don’t talk about much: the stories of eerie noises and ghostly shadows, of poltergeists and the mysterious kangaroo-like creature seen hopping through the cobblestone sidewalks in 1981. Stories of real-life characters like William Dudley Pelley, the well-known Nazi sympathizer and dabbling occultist, who in the 1930s used the Biltmore-Oteen Bank building as the headquarters for his fascist propaganda and as an alleged meeting place for seances and other bizarre rituals. And they’re more than just whispered rumors. “All of our stories are very well researched,” says Chris Sorrells, owner and operator of Haunted Biltmore. Sorrells, with help from local author and ghost hunter Joshua P. Warren, created the tour a year and a half ago as an offshoot to Warren’s popular downtown tour, Haunted Asheville. Sorrells estimates that he spent more than six months scouring the internet and digging though old newspapers and records at the local libraries to track down the historical facts surrounding Biltmore Village. That’s not to mention the hours he spent interviewing current and former employees of the area. “We wanted to make sure that there was some kind of truth related to these local legends,” he says. “What I like is that we take real history, real historical events that have been proven and written down, and we integrate and weave that in with the verbal folklore and the local stories of what people have experienced and heard over the years.”

A different side of Biltmore Village: Eerie noises, ghostly shadows and mysterious kangaroo-like creatures. photos by jonathan welch

And people have been seeing and hearing some strange stuff. Take the Olde World Christmas Shoppe. The cute gift store, nestled inside one of the original century-old cottages, seems to be home to its own holiday spirit. For years, employees there say they’ve heard phantom footsteps and doors slamming when no one else was around. But the pinnacle of all the weird activity occurred in 2004, when an employee gathering supplies from a back closet suddenly turned around and saw something that made her hair stand on end. “It was this amorphous, person-looking thing, with empty black eye sockets, just staring at her,” Sorrells, who interviewed her along with the entire staff a few years ago, says. “It didn’t move, it didn’t say anything, nothing. Finally, she screamed and ran out of the building.” She never came back. Odd activity is still being reported to this day. In fact, the day Xpress stopped by, an employee named Andria told us of an unusual

62 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

event that happened just the night before. “We were running the vacuum cleaner upstairs on one side of the room,” she says, “and all of a sudden a plate came out of the rack and went flying across the room and bro,ke.” It’s another spooky tale that Sorrells can add to his growing collection. And who knows? Years from now, people in the area might still be whispering about that creepy Christmas Shoppe spirit. “It’s cool in that sense of storytelling,” Sorrells says, “when you go and talk to people and they’ll say, ‘My great-great-grandad said that this happened.’ A lot of these stories come down, word-of-mouth, from generation to generation. So documenting these things and telling it to other people, that’s what helps keep these stories alive.” Even when those stories are about the dead. X Miles Britton is an Asheville-based freelance writer.

arts X music

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Silence is more powerful than all the noise in the worldâ&#x20AC;? Chatham County Line pairs chaos and quiet, roots and pop by Alli Marshall Chatham County Line has the instruments â&#x20AC;&#x201D; banjo, guitar, mandolin and fiddle â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and they do the gather-round-the-mic thing. In suits. But, despite the old-time influence and acoustic instrumentation, the Raleigh-based quartet isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t really a bluegrass band. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Through the years we followed our hearts, and realized there are a lot of other bands, like the Steep Canyon Rangers, who are really killing it in a traditional sense. We donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to fill that void,â&#x20AC;? says singer/songwriter Dave Wilson. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Our job has been to service the song the best we can. We donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t add flash for flashâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sake, but try to support the lyrics and the story with the appropriate feel and emotion. We can follow our muse and I can write whatever kind of songs I want and bring them to the group.â&#x20AC;? CCLâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s muse, most recently, resulted in Wildwood, a lush album-full of Americana-byway-of-classical compositions, underscored by textural, layered instrumentation (velvety keys, burbling banjo, sweeping viola) and richly storied lyrics. The record, with its pop savvy and earthy roots, edges toward timelessness, yet is firmly grounded in the present â&#x20AC;&#x201D; which kind of makes sense, considering the bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s beginning. Banjo player Chandler Holt and mandolin/ fiddler player John Teer started showing up at house parties where Wilson and bassist/pianist Greg Readling lived. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Greg and I were in kind of a rocking outfit [called Stillhouse] with him playing pedal steel and Wurlitzer and Hammond organ and stuff. I was playing a lot of electric guitar along with mandolin,â&#x20AC;? says Wilson. â&#x20AC;&#x153;That was our genesis, and our songs directed us to this acoustic route.â&#x20AC;? (That particular trajectory has allowed for some unique developments, such as the bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s use of instruments. While bass/fiddle/banjo says â&#x20AC;&#x153;bluegrass,â&#x20AC;? thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s more than meets the eye: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Chandlerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s banjo playing has really evolved to being more of an electric-guitar part in a lot of ways,â&#x20AC;? says Wilson. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s more melodic than the three-finger drive that Earl

wanttogo? who:

Chatham County Line

what:

Christmas show, featuring Johnny Irion

where:

The Grey Eagle

when:

Saturday, Dec. 18 (9 p.m., $10 advance/$12 day of show. thegreyeagle.com)

ANNUAL CHRISTMAS CONCERT benefit for

Rathbun Center & Asheville Jazz Council Not filling a void: Singer/songwriter Dave Wilson says the band is free to follow its muse. photo by kirk johnson

Scruggs made famous.â&#x20AC;?) CCLâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s start also included producer/musician Chris Stamey of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;80s power-pop quartet The dBâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, who heard Chatham County Line at a send-off for fellow triangle-area musician Tift Merritt. Wilson and Readling were in Merrittâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s band, at the time, and Merritt, in turn invited them to open some of her shows. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Chris Stamey was there and really loved the songs and what we were doing and got us a record deal and pretty much put all of the pieces together to make the first record,â&#x20AC;? says Wilson. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re definitely beholden to him. The experience [led to] more of a pop sensibility, listening to the song and the way the songâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s constructed. Doubling choruses or whatever his input was. It always ended up being something that created a better song in the long run.â&#x20AC;? Soon, Wilson and Readling left Merrittâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s band to pursue CCL full time (though Wilson recently sat in with Merritt on electric guitar â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the two bands have remained close) but, veering from Stameyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pop inclinations (and, indeed, the band now produces its own albums), CCL opted for a bluegrass-style setup. â&#x20AC;&#x153;There are myriad reasons why this works so well, one being the portability of the band,â&#x20AC;? says Wilson. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We can really be a tight unit and travel the country economically with just our instruments and a microphone in a van, versus trying to rattle up a drummer and get a big Sprinter [van] or something. We really love what we do, and feel like it touches people in a way that loud electric music doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t. To get back to the lyrics, our volume is such that you can hear every word.â&#x20AC;? He continues, â&#x20AC;&#x153;We love the silence between the notes. We find as we do shows more and more we do really raucous, energetic stuff but then we try to bring it back down to the real

sparse sound where you can hear the person coughing in the audience. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s almost like silence is more powerful than all the noise in the world.â&#x20AC;? Excepting a handful of special Christmas shows, including CCLâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s upcoming Grey Eagle date. Expect that to get a little loud. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s great to get old friends together to plug in and play a little louder,â&#x20AC;? says Wilson. The old friends in question include Merritt band members/Stillhouse alums drummer Zeke Hutchins (who contributed to Wildwood) and bassist Jay Brown. Also, says Wilson, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a little more pedal steel than before so I think at the Christmas shows people will hear the songs more like they are on the record than the normal Chatham County Line acoustic show.â&#x20AC;? X

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arts X music

Kickstarting a career

Aaron “Woody” Wood makes his album, with a little help from his friends by Wendi Loomis Kickstarter.com has only been around since 2009, but it’s already becoming the go-to approach for musicians, artists, filmmakers and tech developers to raise money for their projects. For artists especially, Kickstarter provides an easy-to-use, easy-to-relay method to get the word out — and to get the money to get things done. There are many recent local examples of Kickstarter in action. It can work out well, for some. Aaron “Woody” Wood’s Kickstarter campaign was one of the first around here, and it succeeded. The background: For nearly a decade, Wood toured and played with The Blue Rags, a mostly defunct blues/ragtime band that signed to Sup Pop Records. After selling off nearly all his music equipment and almost calling it quits earlier this year, Wood may have found the way to jump start (or even Kickstart) his career — in a kind of rebirth as a solo artist. All it took was a little help from family, friends and fans — and a little more help from his manager (and studio manager at Echo Mountain), Jessica Tomasin. Wood credits the entire Kickstarter campaign to Tomasin. “Jess was smart enough to

Dear Dr. Waldman: For the last 3 weeks my right heel has been hurting especially when I get out of bed in the morning and when I start walking after sitting. I don't remember injuring my foot at all. I tried some cushions and ibuprofen from the drugstore but it does not help. It's starting to hurt so bad I don't know what to do. What is going on and what can be done to cure this? - Mrs. G.T., Arden From the symptoms you describe I believe you have one of the most common foot problems I treat in the office. The medical term is plantar fasciitis (Fa-shE-Its) which simply means inflammation of the ligament on the bottom of the heel. A spur on the bottom of the heel bone is often present. The most common reason for this is repetitive pressure on the heel and flat arches (hyper-pronation). I commonly treat this problem with stretching exercises, antiinflammatory pills, shoe inserts and topical relieving gels like BioFreeze. I will often use ultrasound to see inside the heel to evaluate the condition of the ligament. Sometimes the ligament is thickened and/or torn. It may also have an area of inflammation called a bursae. Occasionally a small steroid injection can be given to quickly shrink the bursae and greatly reduce the pain. More than 95% of my patients get long term relief with these treatments. New treatments for resistant heel pain include high energy sound wave which is replacing traditional heel surgery. Of course there are a number of other possible causes for heel pain so you should consult with your podiatric physician soon.

For more information please see our web site: www.blueridgefoot.com. Please call to make an appointment Dr. Daniel Waldman is a Diplomate of the American Board of Podiatric Surgery and a Fellow of the American College of Foot&Ankle Surgeons. Send your foot care questions to: Ask the Foot Doctor, 246 Biltmore Ave. Asheville, NC 28801

64 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

Handed up: When Wood needed help to make a new album, the community stepped up for the effort. And they’ll be rewarded, likely in January. photo by jon leidel

be like, ‘You can do this. We know enough people; we can do it.’ It’s basically all her idea, no joke.” And the two learned some things in the process. Tomasin encourages those running a campaign to “be prepared to actually contribute the last $1,000 and then pay yourself back, if that’s what you need to do so you don’t lose out. Be realistic with what your budget is,” she cautions, “because it’s all or nothing.” Kickstarters are further encouraged “to find ways to get the word out and make your incentives affordable. I think that’s really important. Who are your fans and can they afford that sort of thing? We had some people who were really great and were able to pay anywhere from $100-$750.” However, she explains, “That number was a lot smaller than the people who could afford $15. I think when you don’t offer the incentives at the lower level that you lose a grand by people who can’t afford $50.” There are things to beware, Tomasin warns. “Be prepared, because there are people who do not follow through with what they say they’re going to give you.” The funding “doesn’t happen until the end of your campaign. When it was all said and done, it said that we had raised $9,480. We ended up with $7,800 because people who said they were going to pledge didn’t. Their credit cards or bank accounts were denied.” Wood and Tomasin attribute a great deal of their success to the live events they held during the campaign. “Honestly, there are the people that are not going to take the time and energy to fill [the pledge form] out online,” says Tomasin. “There were a lot of older folks who were like, ‘You know I’m not comfortable put-

ting my credit card on the Internet.’ Another reason to do a private house show, you can get those people to come out to the show. One guy gave us $300 who does not have a computer.” And the album is moving ahead. “Our problem right now is we’re a little behind, because, schedule-wise; it’s just so hard to finish tracking,” Tomasin says. In addition to New York City gigs the first week of December, “Woody’s gone again this month for another seven days — going down to New Orleans. It makes it hard to coordinate with [Wood’s accompanying musicians]. We actually did the vocals for the first five songs in one of our studio houses … and it sounds great. We’ll be doing some things like tracking in unique places just because we don’t have the time here at the studio. All of our rooms are pretty much booked.” At the time of the interview, they had finished three preproduction days with producer Roger Alan Nichols, drummer Mike Rhodes, bassist Tony Black and keys player Robert Ryan Burns. Wood recorded the guitar parts and a scratch vocal. For this, backers who had given $500 were invited into the studio to watch the process for two hours. Tomasin estimates another four full days of tracking to record the keys for the other two songs, as well as Wood’s vocal and guitar overdubs. Then, the mixing. The finished album is expected to be in the hands of backers in January. Coming next week: A look at how other locals fared with Kickstarter. X Wendi Loomis can be reached at wendi@ jazzandpoetry.com.

theproﬁler

by becky upham

Deciding which shows you should see, so you don’t have to The Suspect: Holy Ghost Tent Revival

Indyweek.com says the band’s debut album So Long I Screamed has “…the mischievous air of a Mark Twain yarn.” Hailing from Greensboro, this band lists “lollygagging” as its main interest, but members don’t waste any time in bringing audiences out to the dance floor with their toe-tapping blend of swing, jazz, bluegrass and more. Can Be Found: The Grey Eagle, Friday, Dec. 17. RIYD (Recommended If You Dig): Squirrel Nut Zippers, The Avett Brothers, Langhorne Slim. You Should Go If: Last year you paid for spring break in Cancun through an elaborate gift card laundering scheme; you decorated this year by putting tinsel on the Barcalounger that’s been sitting on your sidewalk since September; if your life were an O. Henry story, your girlfriend would be out selling her hula hoops to buy you a giant checkers set.

The Suspect: Johnny Irion

Becky Upham posts a weekly workout playlist, as well as a featured song of the day, on her blog: beckyupham.com.

Irion formed his first band in Columbia, S.C. at the age of 15, and over the last 17 years or so, his songwriting and singing have drawn comparisons to early Gram Parsons and Neil Young. He is poised to release a new CD this February, Bright Examples. It’s his second full-length album recorded with his wife, Sarah Lee Guthrie, who calls their music country-rock meets pastoral psych-rock aesthetic. Can Be Found: The Grey Eagle, Saturday, Dec. 18. (Playing with Chatham County Line) RIYD: Neil Young, The Jayhawks You Should Go If: Hopping freight trains is your preferred method of getting home for the holidays; you’ve argued with strangers about whether squeezing a dog into a Christmas sweater constitutes abuse; if your life were an O. Henry story, your girlfriend would be out selling her old American Girl doll collection to buy you a Kegerator.

The Suspect: Blind Guardian

This German power-metal band is about to celebrate 25 years of rockin’ the Casbah. Its first American release came in 1999 with Nightfall in Middle-Earth, a Tolkien-inspired concept album. According to the band’s website, its latest release, At the Edge of Time, transports us “… into the dimension of time, where imagination knows no limits, where all worlds exist at once, and where all existence is drenched in song for all time.” Can Be Found: The Orange Peel, Friday, Dec.17. RIYD: Hammerfall, Manowar. You Should Go If: You love to impress people with your encyclopedic knowledge of how soldiers celebrated Christmas on ancient battlefields all around the world; you decked the halls this year by putting Santa hats on all of your Shrek figurines; if your life were an O. Henry story, your girlfriend would be out selling her fairy costume to buy you a 60-pound box of beef from Hickory Nut Gap.

The Suspect: Wooden Toothe

This Asheville foursome combines a gritty, countrytwang with thrashing urgent punk riffs. Formed in 2007, they released their self-titled debut last year. According to a review in Bold Life magazine, the band sounds like Asheville itself: “… spontaneity, lack of pretension and assimilation of a variety of attitudes. Can Be Found: Lexington Avenue Brewery, Saturday, Dec. 18. RIYD: Circle Jerks, the Dead Milkmen. You Should Go If: Using a giant slingshot to catapult fruitcakes at Pack Square last year was mostly your idea; you’ve kidnapped more than 20 baby Jesus dolls from Nativity scenes all over town and show little to no remorse; if your life were an O. Henry story, your girlfriend would be out selling her car to buy you a car.

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soundtrack

local music reviews

Dream Weaver: Tyler Ramsey’s annual solo show by Stacy Claude If you’ve lived in Asheville for any amount of time, and you’re at all involved in the music scene here, you’ve heard of Tyler Ramsey. Maybe you’ve seen him play in local bands like the Tyler Ramsey Trio, DrugMoney or Hollywood Red. Or maybe you had the good fortune to catch a few of those acoustic solo shows at the French Broad Brewery. For those of you who haven’t yet heard of Tyler, he’s most well-known as the lead guitarist for the popular indie rock group, Band of Horses. You may have seen him on Letterman, or in Rolling Stone magazine this year. Due to the touring and recording schedule with Band of Horses, we don’t see him around town as often these days, but he returns for a much anticipated annual Thanksgiving solo show at the Grey Eagle — this year’s was on November 18. Before the music started the stage was anything but empty. It was packed with seven guitars on stands (including two 12-strings) and a very cool vintage-looking hollow-body electric, a rack of pedals and two electronic boxes

Taking a solo: Tyler Ramsey hypnotized the crowd at his most-recent hometown show. photo by lydia see

that were unveiled during the set as a drum machine and a vocal processor. The night began with Joshua Carpenter on an acoustic guitar and vocals. It would be a very hard thing to open up for Ramsey, and when he finished his short set, he joked ironically, “Really guys, stick around for Tyler Ramsey.” Ramsey walked on stage and picked up a parlor-style guitar, plugged it in and launched into a dreamy version of the instrumental “Birdwings,” hypnotizing the crowd with his fluid finger-picking style. Early in his set, Ramsey told the crowd he was battling a cold, and that he was going to try out some new songs. The disclaimer was unnecessary as his singing was spot-on, if slightly scratchy at times, and no one seemed to mind being guinea pigs to the new material. The stand out song was one he said he had written about his grandmother. He cranked up the vocal processor and on the choruses he sang into a second vocal mic that produced what sounded like five-part harmony. It was very M. Ward-ish, adding a depth and

build to a song that was already lyrically and melodically gorgeous. At times it seemed like all the gadgets on stage overwhelmed Ramsey a bit. The drum machine quit mid-song at one point and he said, “That wasn’t supposed to happen …” and kept right on. Switching instruments between each song, and fiddling with the electronics disrupted some of the flow, but his easy stage presence and witty banter kept everyone feeling comfortable and anticipating what would come next. Towards the end of the night, Ramsey pulled up a kick drum beat on the drum machine, and performed “A Long Dream,” which probably got the strongest crowd response of the night, being the title track to his 2008 solo release. With rumors of a second solo album in the works, and a re-issue of A Long Dream About Swimming Across the Sea, Tyler Ramsey fans have much to look forward to. X Stacy Claude writes avlrootsreview.blogspot.com.

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smartbets A Growing Culture benefit

A Growing Culture — a webbased community (going live in the spring of 2011) where farmers and sustainable agriculture advocates can network — gets a fundraising boost from a host of local bands. Members of Asheville Horns, Josh Phillips Folk Festival, Secret B-sides, Yo Mama’s Big Fat Booty Band, Eymarel and Josh Blake (with more special guests to be announced) take to the stage at Pisgah Brewing Company. And there will be food available for purchase. Thursday, Dec. 16 at 8 p.m. Sliding-scale door fee. agrowingculture.com.

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Swannanoa Solstice

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If ugly seasonal sweater parties, Christmas Jams and SantaCons are not quite your speed, try the eighth-annual Swannanoa Solstice. Local recording artists Al Petteway, Amy White and Robin Bullock perform Celtic, American and world-influenced music on guitars, mandolins, fiddle, Appalachian dulcimer, piano, harp and world percussion. Sunday, Dec. 19, 2 and 7 p.m. at Diana Wortham Theatre. $35/$33 seniors/$30 students/$12 children. dwtheatre.com.

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The Santaland Diaries

It’s been said before but this year really really could be the last year that local actor/ comedian Tom Chalmers dons his red-andwhite striped tights and plays the curmudgeonly-festive role of Crumpet the Elf in The Santaland Diaries. The one-man show, based on the narrative by David Sedaris, is a darkly snarky-perfect holiday show (just not for the kids). Thursday, Dec. 16Sunday, Dec. 19 (Thursday-Saturday at 7:30 p.m., Sunday at 2:30 p.m.) on the Asheville Community Theatre mainstage. $15. ashevilletheatre.org.

Club phone numbers are listed in Clubland in the (828) area code unless otherwise stated; more details at www. mountainx.com/clubland. Send your Smart Bet requests in to ae@mountainx.com for consideration by the Monday the week prior to publication.

68 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

smartbets Unsilent Night

According to the event’s website, “Unsilent Night is composer Phil Kline’s free outdoor participatory sound sculpture of many individual parts, recorded on cassettes, CDs and mp3s, and played through a roving swarm of boom boxes carried through city streets every December.” It debuted in New York in ‘92 — join the Asheville contingent on Friday, Dec. 17. Meet at the Vance Monument in Pack Square at 7 p.m. and bring your own boom box or mp3 player. unsilentnight.com.

Winter solstice poetry They’ve dubbed it “Winter Solstice with Sistas: Poetry with Glenis Redmond and Amber Sherer.” Join the two poets to “celebrate the light and the shadows of Winter Solstice,” according to press for the event. The evening will feature new work from the mother-daughter duo. At Posana Café. Monday, December 20. 7 to 9 p.m. info@ posanacafe.com

Overflow Jug Band

Want an antidote to a cold winter night? How about an evening of tunes from some local all-stars? Here’s what drummer Jacob Baumann has to say about the casual outfit Overflow Jug Band: “This is a relatively new [project] consisting of members of The Trainwreks (myself, Ram Mandelkorn and Ben Riva) and Josh Phillips Folk Festival (Josh and Elijah Cramer), along with Moses Atwood and Suzanna Baum. We play a pretty rowdy mixture of country and reggae, as well as a multitude of covers that make us all happy.” Sounds good to us. Saturday, Dec. 18. MoDaddy’s.

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 69

clubland

where to find the clubs • what is playing • listings for venues throughout Western North Carolina 7.#´S 5PSCALE !DULT 2OOM 3PORTS ,OUNGE

•To qualify for a free listing, a venue must be predominately dedicated to the performing arts. Bookstores and cafés with regular open mics and musical events are also allowed. •To limit confusion, events must be submitted by the venue owner or a representative of that venue. •Events must be submitted in written form by e-mail (clubland@mountainx.com), fax, snail mail or hand-delivered to the Clubland Editor Dane Smith at 2 Wall St., Room 209, Asheville, NC 28801. Events submitted to other staff members are not assured of inclusion in Clubland. •Clubs must hold at least TWO events per week to qualify for listing space. Any venue that is inactive in Clubland for one month will be removed. •The Clubland Editor reserves the right to edit or exclude events or venues. •Deadline is by noon on Monday for that Wednesday’s publication. This is a firm deadline.

Paul Cataldo (singer-songwriter)

TallGary’s

Blue Note Grille

BoBo Gallery

Handlebar

Open mic & jam, 7pm

Essence

The Get Down

Loraine Conrad Band (country, Americana, blues)

Bosco’s Sports Zone

The OCR Ball & Trophy Night feat: Carrie Ann Hearst & more

Shag dance

Harrah’s Cherokee

Broadway’s

The Sharkadelics (rock, R&B), 8pm

‘80s night, 10pm

Holland’s Grille

Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

Marc Keller (singer-songwriter)

Bosco’s Sports Zone

Town Pump

Open mic & jam

Open mic

Curras Nuevo Cuisine

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and

Mark Guest (jazz guitar)

Blues

Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

Jim Arrendell & the Cheap Suits Vincenzo’s Bistro

Non-stop rock’n roll sing-a-long party show, 8pm-1am

Steve Whiddon (piano, vocals)

Emerald Lounge

Westville Pub

Folk Soul Revival

Jammin’ w/ Max & Miles

Flat Rock Grille

Wild Wing Cafe

Shane Perlowin (classical guitar), 6-9pm

Brian McGee (rock, alt-country)

French Broad Brewery Tasting

Zydeco holiday dance w/ Bayou Diesel

Old-time jam, 6pm

Fairview Tavern

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Open mic

Front stage: Woody Wood (soul, pop)

Flat Rock Grille

Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill

Jamison Adams (classical guitar), 6-9pm

Soul & jazz jam

Frankie Bones

Olive or Twist

Chris Rhodes (singer-songwriter)

Heather Masterton Trio (swing, jazz)

Athena’s Club

French Broad Chocolate Lounge

Rankin Vault Cocktail Lounge

Disclaimer Stand-Up Lounge (comedy open mic), 9pm

Michael Luketan (roots, folk, traditional)

“Hits & Shits” w/ Jamie Hepler

Thu., December 16

Good Stuff

Red Stag Grill

Athena’s Club

Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Open mic

Robert Thomas (jazz standards, blues)

DJ night

Open mic

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Rendezvous Restaurant & Bar

Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

WED. 12/15

JAMMIN’ W/ MAX & MILES Real New Orleans Po Boys $1 off all Whiskey

LIKE MIND TRIO

Interactive Ensemble-driven Jazz

Free Show - $1 off all Vodkas

FRI. 12/17

SUN. 12/19

TUES. 12/21

THUR. 12/16

Open 11am • $3.50 Gin & Tonics

SAT. 12/18

• All-You-Can-Eat Breakfast & Football… All Day! • 11 ft. Screen • $1 Off Bloody Mary’s & Mimosas

Appetizers - Buy One Get One ½ Off $4 Margaritas! Mon. Night Football • 11 ft. Screen

Fri. 12/17

Sat. 12/18

TRIVIA NIGHT 9 pm • Prizes

Gypsy Jazz

520 Swannanoa River Rd, Asheville, NC 28805

Bluegrass jam

Jack Of The Wood Pub

$5 Robo Shots

(828) 298-1400

Tolliver’s Crossing Irish Pub

Eleven on Grove

Lajos Pagony (piano), 6-10pm

Now You See Them & Holy Ghost Tent Revival 9pm

Chatham County Line

X-Mas Show (feat. Johnny Irion) 9pm

Sun. 12/19

Helping Hands for TRINA! 4-8pm A benefit to help offset the medical expenses of Trina Royar

New Southern Ramblers Green Grass Cloggers & Many More + an Open Jam!

Come celebrate our area’s incredible live music before 12/22, when we close for the Christmas Holidays

The new home of

MON. 12/20

Roots Cafe

feat. the finest in fresh, local & organic cuisine. Open at 5pm

TUESDAY OPEN BLUES JAM Shrimp ‘n Grits $1 off Rum Drinks

777 HAYWOOD ROAD • 225-WPUB (9782)

www.westvillepub.com

70 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

232-5800 www.thegreyeagle.com 185 Clingman Ave.

BoBo Gallery

Blind Boy Chocolate & the Milk Sheiks (jugband, old-time)

Horizons at Grove Park Inn

ONE LEG UP

Mon. - Sat. (6:30pm - 2am)

Sugarfoot Serenaders CD release party (hot jazz) w/ The Queen (cover band), 10pm

Non-stop rock’n roll sing-a-long party show, 8pm-1am

Wed., December 15

Over 30 Beautiful Entertainers Best Dance Prices in Town Nightly Drink Specials Enjoy Our Awesome Smoking Deck (where you won’t miss a minute of the action) All UFC & Boxing PPV on 6 Big Screens Spinning Pole

Bill Covington (classics), 6-7pm Maddy & Masterpiece (requests), 7-11pm

Open mic w/ Brian Keith

Jazz jam

Blue Note Grille

Clubland rules

Room

Waller (folk, indie, country) Good Stuff

Gene Peyroux & The Snow Monkeys (“extreme Americana”)

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Red Stag Grill

Bill Covington (classics), 6-7pm Maddy & Masterpiece (requests), 7-11pm

Billy Sheeran (piano)

Mark Appleford (Americana, blues), 8-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am

Rendezvous Restaurant & Bar

Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Havana Restaurant

Steve Whiddon the pianoman

Acoustic Swing

Salsa dance, 7pm

Root Bar No. 1

Blue Note Grille

Horizons at Grove Park Inn

Jay Brown (acoustic, folk)

Mark Guest Trio (jazz)

Lajos Pagony (piano), 6-10pm

Scandals Nightclub

BoBo Gallery

In Plain Site

Bluegrass jam, 7pm

Local DJ exposure night feat: Soldato, DJ Acolyte & Selector Cleofus

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Stella Blue

The John Douglas Company (rock) w/ Stillview

Back stage: Rene Breton (rock, indie) w/ Hello Hugo

The Enemy Lovers (indie, rock)

Lobster Trap

Electro-lush w/ Mark Davis & Krik Nice, 10pm

Hank Bones (“man of 1,000 songs”)

The Get Down

Mark Guest (jazz guitar)

Marc Keller (acoustic, variety)

Pleasures of the Ultraviolent w/ Reptar Love & Captain Deal

Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar

Mela

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Belly dancing

Peggy Ratusz & friends

Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill

Vincenzo’s Bistro

The Broadcast (soul, rock, pop)

Aaron LaFalce (piano)

Olive or Twist

Watershed

Swing dancing w/ Heather Masterton & The Swing Station Band

Open mic

You Dirt Rats (rock) w/ Broomstars & Josh Blake’s Jukebox

Westville Pub

Firestorm Cafe and Books

Pack’s Tavern

Like Mind Trio (jazz)

Aaron LaFalce (acoustic)

White Horse

Pisgah Brewing Company

Food drive w/ local music

Austin Miller & Jaime Lauren Webb (acoustic, soul), 5pm A Midwinter Night Solstice Ball (costumes encouraged), 7pm

Jack Of The Wood Pub

Mack Kell’s Pub & Grill

A Growing Culture Fundraiser w/ members of Asheville Horns, Josh Phillips Folk Festival, Secret B-Sides & more, 7pm Purple Onion Cafe

Clay Ross (Americana)

FOOTBALL

Boiler Room

Craggie Brewing Company

Chelsea Lynn LaBate (acoustic, folk, soul)

Temptations Red Room

Curras Nuevo Cuisine

Fresh Ingredients • Vegan Friendly

Non-stop rock’n roll sing-a-long party show, 8pm-1am Electronic dance w/ local producers/DJs, 10pm Emerald Lounge

Flat Rock Grille

DJ Paco dance party

Fri., December 17

Live jazz w/ Steve Sarant & Johnny Ferrara, 6-9pm

Athena’s Club

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

JWbb=WhoÉi AN EATING & DRINKING ESTABLISHMENT

open miC / open Jam 7 pm ‘til

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Over 70 Beers on Tap Monumental Hoagies Specialty Pizza Scrumptious Salads

Eleven on Grove

Wild Wing Cafe

one Free appetizer with any two entreeS

NFL

B?EDI 6 8K997D;;HI <7B9EDI 6 I;7>7MAI 8HED9EI 6 H7?:;HI @;JI 6 IJ;;B;HI

thurs. Dec. 16

rene breTon w/ Hello Hugo

fri. Dec. 17

lOCAlS TueSdAy

Hellblinki

25% OFF All FOOd

w/ THe Penny DreaDfuls sat. Dec. 18

wooDen TooTHe

w/ valid local Id

w/ big eye, small roboT

girl interrupted

o n T H e f r o n T s Ta g e

D<B <EEJ87BB 4 College Street

828.232.0809 tallgaryS.Com

sunDays

Aaron Price 1pm | Piano

tuesDays

Jake Hollifield Piano | 9pm

WeDnesDays

Woody Wood 9pm

50 Broadway • Asheville, NC 236-9800 mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 71

Nikki Tally (rock, folk, blues)

If You Wannas (rock, indie, pop) w/ The Critters

French Broad Chocolate Lounge

The Warehouse Live

Sunset Sessions w/ Ben Hovey (â&#x20AC;&#x153;sonic scientistâ&#x20AC;?), 7-10pm

Owen Tharp (holiday jazz)

Live music

Iron Horse Station

Good Stuff

Tolliverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Crossing Irish Pub

Paul Cataldo (acoustic, roots)

Valorie Miller (folk, Americana)

Live music

Jack Of The Wood Pub

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Town Pump

Trailer Trash (country swing, honkey-tonk)

Now You See Them (indie, folk, pop) w/ Holy Ghost Tent Revival

Copper Kettle Bluegrass

Jerusalem Garden

Tressaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Belly dancing w/ live music

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Josh Singleton & the Funky Four Corners (â&#x20AC;&#x153;funkabillyâ&#x20AC;?)

Bill Covington (classics), 6-7pm Maddy & Masterpiece (requests), 7-11pm

Vincenzoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bistro

Back stage: Wooden Toothe (rock, punk) w/ Big Eye, Small Robot

Handlebar

Bobby Sullivan (piano)

Midway Tavern

Toubab Krewe (jam, world, afro-pop) w/ Cas Haley

White Horse

Live music

Charles Unger (jazz)

Mo-Daddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bar & Grill

Harrahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cherokee

Wild Wing Cafe

Overflow Jug Band (acoustic, folk)

Mark Keller (singer-songwriter)

Olive or Twist

DJ San-D Highland Brewing Company

Floating Action (rock, indie, pop)

Sat., December 18

Hollandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Grille

Athenaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Club

Twist of Fate (Southern rock) Horizons at Grove Park Inn

Lajos Pagony (piano), 6-10pm Iron Horse Station

Twilite Broadcasters (â&#x20AC;&#x153;old time harmoniesâ&#x20AC;?) Jack Of The Wood Pub

Clay Ross Band (bluegrass, Brazilian folk) Jerusalem Garden

Belly dancing w/ live music Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

SATURDAY 12/18

COUNTRY SWING & HONKY TONK FRIDAY 12/24

;gZY H`ZaaZc\Zg 8deeZg @ZiiaZ

SIZZLINâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; HOT BLUEGRASS TO WARM YOUR CHRISTMAS EVE! SATURDAY 12/25

- CLOSED FRIDAY 12/31

Hdch d[ GVae]

RING IN THE NEW YEAR WITH RALPH!

72 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 â&#x20AC;˘ mountainx.com

Blue Note Grille

LeMaster Plan (singer-songwriter duo, covers) BoBo Gallery

Jason DeCristofaro (jazz) Craggie Brewing Company

Do it to Julia (indie, folk, acoustic)

Elaineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dueling Piano Bar

Orange Peel

IgV^aZg IgVh] [ZVi# Gjhh L^ahdc

Barrie Howard (country)

Luellaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bar-B-Que

Grateful Dead Night w/ Phuncle Sam

BLUEGRASS MEETS BRAZILIAN FOLK

Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Curras Nuevo Cuisine

Mo-Daddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bar & Grill

8aVn Gdhh 7VcY

Mark Appleford (Americana, blues), 8-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am

Back stage: Hellblinki Sextet (blues, calypso, â&#x20AC;&#x153;pirateâ&#x20AC;?) w/ Penny Dreadfuls Little Friday Band (â&#x20AC;&#x153;front porch rockâ&#x20AC;?)

FRIDAY 12/17

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Greg Olson (folk) Non-stop rockâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;n roll sing-a-long party show, 8pm-1am Eleven on Grove

WestSound Red & Black Holiday Ball

Blind Guardian (metal) w/ Holy Grail & Seven Kingdoms

Emerald Lounge

Packâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Tavern

Fairview Tavern

Kung Fu Dynamite (rock, funk) w/ Shownuff

42nd Street Jazz Band Packâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Tavern

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;80s/â&#x20AC;&#x2122;90s night w/ live DJ Purple Onion Cafe

Uptown Jazz Quartet Red Stag Grill

Chris Rhodes (singer-songwriter) Rendezvous Restaurant & Bar

Live DJ Root Bar No. 1

10 Cent Poetry w/ Melissa Hyman (acoustic, folk) Scandals Nightclub

DJ dance party & drag show Stella Blue

Holly Golightly (blues, country, soul) w/ the Brokeoffâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s & Suttree Straightaway Cafe;

Pat Flaherty (folk) TallGaryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

Girl Interrupted (rock) Temptations Red Room

Super duper dance party w/ live DJ

WestSound (R&B, dance)

Jarvis Jenkins Band

Pisgah Brewing Company

Flat Rock Grille

The Town Mountain Country Revue (bluegrass, country)

Live jazz w/ Dave Lagadi, 6-9pm

Josh Singleton & the Funky Four Corners CD release party

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room

The Warehouse Live

Purple Onion Cafe

Peggy Ratusz (rock, blues)

Fred Whisken (jazz pianist)

French Broad Chocolate Lounge

Red Stag Grill

High Gravity Jazz Trio

Chris Rhodes (singer-songwriter)

Good Stuff

Rendezvous Restaurant & Bar

Todd Hoke (Americana, country, folk)

Rewind Blue

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Root Bar No. 1

Linda Mitchell (blues)

Chatham County Line (progressive bluegrass) w/ Johnny Irion

Stella Blue

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Mother Soul w/ Flopchopper & From the Ashes (metal)

Bill Covington (classics), 6-7pm Maddy & Masterpiece (requests), 7-11pm

Straightaway Cafe;

Handlebar

The Get Down

Live music Town Pump

South 85 Tressaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Skinny Legs & All (rock, blues) Vincenzoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bistro

Marc Keller Westville Pub

One Leg Up (acoustic swing) White Horse

Jazz the Ripper (funk, jazz) Wild Wing Cafe

Neal Crowley (instrumental, jazz, bluegrass, rock)

The Workâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Annual Christmas Jam feat: Larry Keel, Curtis Birch, Shane Pruitt & more

TallGaryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

Harrahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cherokee

Sun., December 19

Unit 50 (rock)

DJ San-D

Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Temptations Red Room

Horizons at Grove Park Inn

John Cook (blues, folk)

D-Day dance party

Lajos Pagony (piano), 6-10pm

Boscoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Sports Zone

The Get Down

Hotel Indigo

Shag dance & lessons

Aaron LaFalce (acoustic, alternative)

clubdirectory The 170 La Cantinetta 687-8170 Asheville Civic Center & Thomas Wolfe Auditorium 259-5544 Athena’s Club 252-2456 Avenue M 350-8181 Barley’s Tap Room 255-0504 Beacon Pub 686-5943 Blue Mountain Pizza 658-8777 Blue Note Grille 697-6828 Boiler Room 505-1612 BoBo Gallery 254-3426 Bosco’s Sports Zone 684-1024 Broadway’s 285-0400 Club Hairspray 258-2027 Craggie Brewing Company 254-0360 Curras Nuevo 253-2111 Desoto Lounge 986-4828 Diana Wortham Theater 257-4530 The Dripolator 398-0209 Ed Boudreaux’s Bayou BBQ 296-0100 Elaine’s Dueling Piano Bar 252-2711 Eleven on Grove 505-1612 Emerald Lounge 232- 4372 Fairview Tavern 505-7236 Feed & Seed + Jamas Acoustic 216-3492

Firestorm Cafe 255-8115 Frankie Bones 274-7111 Fred’s Parkside Pub & Grill 281-0920 French Broad Brewery Tasting Room 277-0222 French Broad Chocolate Lounge 252-4181 The Garage 505-2663 The Get Down 505-8388 Good Stuff 649-9711 Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern 232-5800 Grove House Eleven on Grove 505-1612 The Grove Park Inn (Elaine’s Piano Bar/ Great Hall) 252-2711 The Handlebar (864) 233-6173 The Hangar 684-1213 Hannah Flanagans 252-1922 Harrah’s Cherokee 497-7777 Havana Restaurant 252-1611 Highland Brewing Company 299-3370 Holland’s Grille 298-8780 Infusions 665-2161 Iron Horse Station 622-0022 Jack of the Wood 252-5445 Jerusalem Garden 254-0255 Jus One More 253-8770

Craggie Brewing Company

Hangover in the Hangar: “Bring your vinyl and we’ll spin it; Bring your own food and we’ll grill it,” 2-8pm Diana Wortham Theater

A Swannanoa Solstice (holiday) feat: Al Petteway, Amy White & Robin Bullock Flat Rock Grille

Live jazz w/ Dave Lagadi, 12pm Garage at Biltmore

Diamond Thieves X-mas party Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Benefit for Trina Royar feat: New Southern Ramblers, Green Grass Cloggers, Bob Willoughby’s Swing/Soul Revival & more, 4-8pm Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Classical guitar duo, 10am-12:30pm Bob Zullo (jazz, guitar), 6:30-10:30pm Horizons at Grove Park Inn

Laurey’s Catering 252-1500 Lexington Avenue Brewery 252-0212 The Lobster Trap 350-0505 Luella’s Bar-B-Que 505-RIBS Mack Kell’s Pub & Grill 253-8805 Midway Tavern 687-7530 Mela 225-8880 Mellow Mushroom 236-9800 Mike’s Tavern 281-3096 Mo-Daddy’s Bar & Grill 258-1550 Olive Or Twist 254-0555 O’Malley’s On Main 246-0898 The Orange Peel 225-5851 Pack’s Tavern 225-6944 Pineapple Jack’s 253-8860 Pisgah Brewing Co. 669-0190 Posana Cafe 505-3969 Pulp 225-5851 Purple Onion Cafe 749-1179 Rankin Vault 254-4993 Red Stag Grill at the Grand Bohemian Hotel 505-2949 Rendezvous 926-0201 Rock Bottom Sports Bar & Grill 622-0001 Root Bar No.1 299-7597

Lajos Pagony (piano), 6-10pm Hotel Indigo

Scandals Nightclub 252-2838 Scully’s 251-8880 Skyland Performing Arts Center 693-0087 Stella Blue 236-2424 Stephanie’s Roadhouse Bistro 299-4127 The Still 683-5913 Straightaway Cafe 669-8856 Switzerland Cafe 765-5289 Tallgary’s 232-0809 Temptations Red Room 252-0775 Thirsty Monk South 505-4564 Tolliver’s Crossing Irish Pub 505-2129 Town Pump 669-4808 Tressa’s Downtown Jazz & Blues 254-7072 Vanuatu Kava 505-8118 Vincenzo’s Bistro 254-4698 The Warehouse Live 681-9696 The Watershed 669-0777 Wedge Brewery 505 2792 Well Bred Bakery & Cafe 645-9300 Westville Pub 225-9782 White Horse 669-0816 Wild Wing Cafe 253-3066

Jack Of The Wood Pub

Mon., December 20

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Front stage: Aaron Price (piano) Luella’s Bar-B-Que

Jon Corbin (of Firecracker Jazz Band), 122:30pm Orange Peel

Peter Himmelman (singer-songwriter, rock) w/ Skinny Legs & All Rankin Vault Cocktail Lounge

Scandals Nightclub

DJ dance party & drag show

LIVE MUSIC No Cover!

Thurs. 12/16 Fri. 12/17

3pm-2am everyday pinball, foosball, ping-pong & a kickass jukebox kitchen open until late 504 Haywood Rd. West Asheville • 828-255-1109 “It’s bigger than it looks!”

Aaron LaFalce [acoustic]

WestSound [funk ‘n roll]

Sat. 12/18 Justin Burle (live DJ) '80s / '90s Night

NFL TICKET & COLLEGE GAMEDAY 110” HD Projector Screen & 8 HD Big Screen TV’s

$06/5%08/ UP

New Year’s Eve Celebration!

3 Floors, 2 DJs, Multiple Bars, Balloon Drops & Champagne Toast! $10 Advance Tix Available at Pack’s

Century Room

Buffet Dinner $28/person

Fairview Tavern Next to Home Depot

831 Old Fairview Rd. 828-505-7236 SaT. dec. 18

Jarvis Jenkins Band wed • Open Jam Thur • KaraOKe

Fri. dec. 31 BlueS year eve

Delta Moon

tix available daily FOOd & drinK SpecialS

The Gin Fits w/ Mr. Hurl, 8pm Vincenzo’s Bistro

Irish session, 3pm

Restaurant • Bar • Patio Sports Room • Events Space …overlooking Pack Square Park

The Get Down

Sunset Sessions w/ Ben Hovey (“sonic scientist”), 7-10pm

“Vinyl at the Vault” w/ Chris Ballard

Now Serving Cocktails!

clubland@mountainx.com

Mon-Thur 3-1 • Fri & SaT 12-2 • Sun 12-1

Steve Whiddon (piano, vocals)

BoBo Gallery

Classics w/ Z (DJ) Emerald Lounge

Open mic Firestorm Cafe and Books

Amy Steinberg (music, comedy) Garage at Biltmore

Polaris: Full Moon Winter Solstice Party Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern

Contra dance Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Bob Zullo (jazz, guitar), 6:30-10:30pm

Open 7 Days (11am - ‘til)

225-6944 • packstavern.com FREE Parking weekdays after 5pm & all weekend (behind us on Marjorie St.)

20 S. Spruce St.

(off Biltmore Ave. beside Pack Square Park)

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 73

*I=;F +OMC= #P?LS 1OH>;S JG

Plus, XPress Arts Writer Alli MArshAll & BAd Ash tAlk ABout locAl shoWs & events!

karaoke

Horizons at Grove Park Inn

Garage at Biltmore

Lajos Pagony (piano), 6-10pm

AshAsheville Xmas Blowout

Disclaimer Stand-Up Lounge (comedy open mic), 9pm

Mo-Daddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bar & Grill

Grove Park Inn Great Hall

Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Songwriter in the Round Series feat: Moses Atwood w/ Jar-e & Juan Holladay

Bill Covington (classics), 6-7pm Maddy & Masterpiece (requests), 7-11pm

Open mic

monday

Blue Note Grille

Posana Cafe

Iron Horse Station

Kat Williams & Tom Leiner (jazz, blues, soul)

Open mic w/ Jesse James, 7-10pm

Jazz jam

Mack Kellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s / Tressaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Downtown Jazz and Blues / Wild Wing Cafe

The Get Down

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB)

Masters Bluegrass Jam

Front stage: Jake Hollifield (blues, ragtime)

Tressaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Downtown Jazz and Blues

Mo-Daddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bar & Grill

Vocal Jazz Session w/ Sharon LaMotte (jazz), 7:30pm

Kellin Watson (folk, soul, pop)

Vincenzoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bistro

Open mic

Marc Keller

Rankin Vault Cocktail Lounge

Tue., December 21 Blue Mountain Pizza Cafe

Patrick Fitzsimons (folk, blues, roots) Blue Note Grille

Miguel y Antonio (acoustic duo) BoBo Gallery

Micheal Libramento Allstars (holiday classics) Eleven on Grove

Beginner swing & tango lessons, 6-7pm Dance w/ live band or DJ, 8pm Emerald Lounge

Tuesday Night Funk Jam Firestorm Cafe and Books

Open mic

Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Malleyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s On Main

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Vinyl at the Vaultâ&#x20AC;? w/ Chris Ballard The Get Down

Aaron LaFalce (alternative, acoustic)

Red Hot Sugar Babies (hot jazz) Boscoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Sports Zone

Shag dance Broadwayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

Moscow Balletâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Greatest Russian Nutcrackerâ&#x20AC;? Tolliverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Crossing Irish Pub

Blues night

wednesday Beacon Pub / Fredâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Parkside Pub & Grill / The Hangar / Infusions / Midway Tavern / Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Malleys on Main Hollandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Grille /

Non-stop rockâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;n roll sing-a-long party show, 8pm-1am

Flat Rock Grille

Jamison Adams (classical guitar), 6-9pm Frankie Bones

Chris Rhodes (singer-songwriter)

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Stephon Lamar (indie, folk) Good Stuff

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Jimmy Landry (folk rock) Red Stag Grill

Billy Sheeran (piano) Rendezvous Restaurant & Bar

Steve Whiddon the pianoman

Fred Whisken (jazz pianist) Red Stag Grill

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Scandals Nightclub

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Tolliver’s Crossing Irish Pub

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Temptations Red Room

Tom & the Whiting Brothers

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Joe Carlson (singer-songwriter)

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David Zoll Trio

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Eleven on Grove

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Havana Restaurant

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42nd Street Jazz Band

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Lajos Pagony (piano), 6-10pm

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Bluegrass jam, 7pm

Matt Getman (jazz, soul, pop)

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Hank Bones (“man of 1,000 songs”)

Ian Harrod (Americana)

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Grove Park Inn Great Hall

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Bill Covington (classics), 6-7pm Maddy & Masterpiece (requests), 7-11pm

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Heather Luttrell (rock, soul, Americana) w/ Underhill Rose

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Fred Skellenger & Copper Kettle (bluegrass)

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Local Art

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‘80s/’90s night w/ live DJ

Temptations Red Room

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The Krektones (rock, surf) The Warehouse Live

Live music Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues

The Free Flow Band (soul, funk) Vincenzo’s Bistro

Marc Keller

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 75

76 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

crankyhanke

theaterlistings Friday, DECEMBER 17 - Tuesday, DECEMBER 21

Due to possible last-minute scheduling changes, moviegoers may want to confirm showtimes with theaters.

movie reviews & listings by ken hanke

JJJJJ max rating

additional reviews by justin souther contact xpressmovies@aol.com

pickoftheweek Black Swan JJJJJ

Director: Darren Aronofsky (The Wrestler) Players: Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis, Vincent Cassel, Barbara Hershey, Winona Ryder Psychological Thriller/Horror Rated R

The Story A ballerina in a Lincoln Center opera company lands the lead role in a production of “Swan Lake” — and the experience threatens her sanity. The Lowdown: A rewarding, disturbing, full-blooded essay in psychological horror of a kind we rarely see — and one of the best films of 2010. If Roman Polanski had made The Red Shoes (1948), the results might have been something like Darren Aronofsky’s Black Swan. Aronofsky is certainly indebted to both Michael Powell’s film and to Polanski in Black Swan. On occasion, he even directly quotes from The Red Shoes, and he’s in the realm of psychological thriller that questions the nature of identity that’s been at the center of many Polanski films for 50 years. And yet for all its areas of influence, Aronofsky’s film has a character all its own. Is it the best film of 2010? Perhaps. It’s certainly a major contender. In its simplest terms, this is the story of Nina (Natalie Portman), a ballet dancer who is essentially living the dream of her mother, Erica (Barbara Hershey), whose own career was side-lined by her pregnancy. Nina dances for a ballet company at Lincoln Center that is overseen by Thomas Leroy (Vincent Cassel). The company’s new season is to start with Leroy’s re-imagining of Tchaikovsky’s “Swan Lake.” Since Leroy has discarded his star — and lover — Beth Macintyre (Winona Ryder), it’s just possible that Nina might land the lead role. The problem is that while Leroy finds her perfect for the White Swan, he finds her classical perfection entirely wrong for the Black Swan. Seeing no dark side in her weighs against Nina’s chances (as does her apparent unwillingness to succumb to Leroy’s advances), yet she somehow gets the role — after seemingly being told she hasn’t. Factored into the equation is newcomer Lily (Mila Kunis), who is everything Nina isn’t. She is the opposite of perfect and is openly sexual, where Nina is repressed and priggish. In fact, Lily truly is the Black Swan. Nina is drawn to her — either in spite of or because of the fact that Lily is a rival. The rivalry is made even more pronounced when Leroy makes Lily Nina’s understudy. Nina is fascinated by Lily’s sexual nature and her freedom

Natalie Portman in Darren Aronofsky’s bold and brilliant Black Swan — one of the best films of 2010. — perhaps she’s even romantically inclined toward her. Lily is what she’d like to resemble — everything her mother has prevented her from being in her smothering, obsessive pursuit of Nina’s career. That’s the setup — or so it seems — and the story follows Nina’s progression through the rehearsals and the premiere of “Swan Lake.” But the question — one that becomes ever more slippery — is where reality leaves off and Nina’s fantasy life begins. And the film isn’t exactly answering that question, choosing instead to leave the exact point of departure between truth and fantasy uncertain. That was suggested by the film’s very first scene — and by the end you realize that we’ve never known how much of what we’ve seen was in the mind of our main character. It’s a skillful approach as we watch Nina descend into horror and madness — very much evoking memories of Catherine Deneuve in Polanski’s Repulson (1965), of Polanski himself in The Tenant (1976) and even of Ewan McGregor in this year’s The Ghost Writer. All of these films are ones in which the identity of the main character threatens to be stamped out by the encroachment of madness, or a stronger personality, or both. Yet Polanski works in a very different tone than does Aronofsky. Polanski never made a film this excessive and operatic. Black Swan is a much more flamboyant work, which is only right considering the subject matter. This is a film about people living in the larger-than-life world of the performing arts. It needs to be big — and, thankfully, that’s exactly the emotionally real, viscerally disturbing, phantasmagorically compelling movie Aronofsky and his fearless

star serve up. I actually cannot do justice to Black Swan within these confines. It’s too rich and too dense with various possible readings and dark undercurrents. But it is, without a doubt, a movie that belongs on your must-see list. Rated R for strong sexual content, disturbing violent images, language and some drug use. reviewed by Ken Hanke Starts Friday at The Carolina Asheville Cinema 14 and Fine Arts Theatre.

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader JJ

Director: Michael Apted (Amazing Grace) Players: Georgie Henley, Skandar Keynes, Ben Barnes, Will Poulter, Gary Sweet Allegorical Fantasy Rated PG

The Story The two younger Pevensie children are whisked back to Narnia for further adventures. The Lowdown: Dull adventure, debatable religious themes and childish fantasy are doled out in massively halting slabs in this third installment in the Narnia series. Despite the trailers and despite a complete lack of interest in these C.S. Lewis film adaptations, I held out some slim hope for The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader — owing to the fact that it was directed

Movie reviews continue on page 79

Asheville Pizza & Brewing Co. (254-1281)

Please call the info line for updated showtimes. Elf (PG) 1:00, 4:00 Paranormal Activity 2 (R) 10:00 RED (PG-13) 7:00 n

Carmike Cinema 10 (298-4452)

Carolina Asheville Cinema 14 (274-9500)

127 Hours (R) 12:25, 2:45, 5:00, 7:15, 9:30 (Sofa Cinema) Black Swan (R) 11:45, 2:15, 4:40, 7:20, 9:45 The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (PG) 11:30, 12:00, 2:05 2:35, 4:40, 5:10, 7:15, 7:45, 9:50, 10:20 Due Date (R) 11:55, 2:05, 4:20, 7:55, 10:15 (Sofa Cinema) Fair Game (PG-13) 11:45, 2:15, 4:55, 7:25, 9:55 (Sofa Cinema) The Fighter (R) 11:40, 2:30, 5:05, 7:35, 10:15 Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 (PG-13) 11:40, 2:45, 7:00, 10:10 How Do You Know? (R) 11:30, 2:00. 4:25, 7:35,10:05 Monsters (R) 11:50, 2:10, 4:35, 7:50, 10:10 The Tourist (PG-13) 11:55, 2:25, 4:50, 7:30, 10:05 TRON: Legacy 3D (PG) 11:35, 2:15, 5:00, 7:45, 10:30 TRON: Legacy 2D (PG) 12:30, 3:30, 7:00, 9:45 Yogi Bear 3D (PG) 12:20, 2:25, 4:35, 7:05, 9:15 n

Cinebarre (665-7776)

Hereafter (PG-13) 1:00 (Fri-Sun), 4:10, 7:20, 10:00 (Fri-Sun) RED (PG-13) 1:20 (Fri-Sun), 4:20, 7:30, 10:10 (Fri-Sun) Skyline (PG-13) 1:10 (Fri-Sun), 4:00, 7:00, 9:45 (Fri-Sun) Stone (R) 1:30 (Fri-Sun), 4:30, 7:15, 9:50 (Fri-Sun) The Town (R) 1:15 (Fri-Sun), 4:15, 7:10, 10:05 (Fri-Sun) n

Co-ed Cinema Brevard (883-2200)

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (PG) 1:00, 4:00, 7:00 n

Epic of Hendersonville (693-1146)

Fine Arts Theatre (232-1536)

Black Swan (R) 1:00, 4:00, 7:00, Late show Fri-Sat 9:20 The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest (R) 1:20, 4:20, 7:20 n

Flatrock Cinema (697-2463)

Waiting for Superman (PG) 4:00, 7:00 n

Regal Biltmore Grande Stadium 15 (684-1298)

United Artists Beaucatcher (298-1234)

For some theaters movie listings were not available at press time. Please contact the theater or check mountainx.com for updated information.

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 77

Tune In to Cranky Hanke’s Movie Reviews

5:30 pm Fridays on Matt Mittan’s Take a Stand.

nowplaying 127 Hours JJJJJ

James Franco, Amber Tamblyn, Kate Mara, Clémence Poésy, Treat Williams, Kate Burton Fact-Based Drama A fact-based story about Aron Ralston, who chose to cut off his arm rather than die when he was trapped by a boulder in the walls of a narrow canyon. A harrowing, brutal, yet ultimately life-affirming film from Danny Boyle. It’s virtually a two-man show—director and star James Franco—and one of the movies of the year. Rated R

Black Swan JJJJJ

Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis, Vincent Cassel, Barbara Hershey, Winona Ryder Psychological Thriller/Horror The Story A ballerina in a Lincoln Center opera company lands the lead role in a production of “Swan Lake”—and the experience threatens her sanity. A rewarding, disturbing, full-blooded essay in psychological horror of a kind we rarely see—and one of the best films of 2010. Rated R

Burlesque JJJ

Cher, Christina Aguilera, Eric Dane, Cam Giganet, Stanley Tucci, Kristen Bell, Peter Gallagher Velveeta-oozing Musical Girl from Iowa makes her way to the big city to seek fame and fortune in show business. Burlesque hasn’t a single original idea in its cheesy head, and manages to load on the clichés with a shovel. Somehow it just misses being so bad it’s good, and only attains the level of modestly awful. Rated PG-13

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The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader JJ

Georgie Henley, Skandar Keynes, Ben Barnes, Will Poulter, Gary Sweet Allegorical Fantasy The Story The two younger Pevensie children are whisked back to Narnia for further adventures. Dull adventure, debatable religious themes and childish fantasy are doled out in massively halting slabs in this third installment in the Narnia series. Rated PG

Fair Game JJJJJ

Naomi Watts, Sean Penn, Sam Shepard, Noah Emmerich, Michael Kelly, Bruce McGill Fact-Based Political Drama The story of Joseph Wilson, who blew the whistle on the Bush administration for ignoring evidence that Iraq had no nuclear weapons program—and the fallout that occurred when it was leaked that his wife, Valerie Plame, was a CIA agent. An incendiary film about the duplicity of the Bush administration’s machinations to wage war on Iraq. It will undoubtedly polarize audiences. Rated PG-13

The Fighter JJJJ

Mark Wahlberg, Christian Bale, Amy Adams, Melissa Leo, Mickey O’Keefe, Jack McGee Biographical Boxing Drama The Story The real-life story of boxer “Irish” Mickey Ward and his rise to fame against all odds—including the help of his family. A good, creatively made boxing biopic that never breaks through into actual greatness, despite fine work from Mark Wahlberg and Amy Adams. Rated R

The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest JJJJ

Michael Nyqvist, Noomi Rapace, Lena Endre, Annika Hallin, Jacob Ericksson Crime/Thriller The conclusion of the scenario set up in The Girl Who Played With Fire. Not up there with The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, but as good as or better

78 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

than The Girl Who Played With Fire. A solid finale to the series. Rated R

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 JJJJJ

Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson, Ralph Fiennes, Alan Rickman, Bill Nighy Horror/Fantasy With Dumbledore dead and Hogwarts no longer a haven, Harry Potter and his friends find themselves on the run from Lord Voldemort while preparing for the final confrontation with him. A darker, more horrific Harry Potter movie that may not work entirely on its own—but it is, after all, only part one of two. Still, the film continues and expands upon the creativity and quality of the series. Rated PG-13

Megamind JJJ

(Voices) Will Ferrell, Tina Fey, Jonah Hill, David Cross, Brad Pitt Animated Superhero Spoof A super villain finds life without point or meaning when he vanquishes his nemesis. Professionally done all the way with strong voice casting, but lacking anything new or compelling. Rated PG

Monsters JJJJ

Whitney Able, Scoot McNairy Science Fiction Two Americans make their way through the “infected zone”— infected with aliens—of northern Mexico to get back to the U.S. An interesting mixed bag of pretty good science fiction and an intriguing subtext that is dragged down by two unlikable leads and dull dialogue. Rated R

Pelada JJJJ

Luke Boughen, Gwendolyn Oxenham Sports Documentary Two college grads travel the world looking for pickup soccer games. A nice little documentary, whose appeal is probably more dependent on your feelings towards the game of soccer and the documentary form than anything else. Rated NR

Tangled JJJJ

(Voices) Mandy Moore, Zachary Levi, Donna Muprhy, Ron Perlman, M.C. Gainey Animated Fairy Tale Animated variation on the “Rapunzel” fairy tale. A largely successful, charming, beautifully made animated film that is neither too smart for its own good, nor too gooey. Rated PG

The Tourist JJJ

Johnny Depp, Angelina Jolie, Paul Bettany, Timothy Dalton, Steven Berkoff, Rufus Sewell Would-be Romantic Thriller The Story An American tourist meets a mysterious woman on a train and finds himself plunged into a web of intrigue. It ought to be an effervescent bottle of Veuve Clicquot champagne, but this supposed romantic thriller is more flat ginger ale than anything else. Neither the stars nor the scenery can save it from tedium. Rated PG-13

Unstoppable JJJ

Denzel Washington, Chris Pine, Rosario Dawson, Ethan Suplee, Kevin Dunn Action A conductor and an engineer must stop a runaway train carrying toxic materials before it derails and causes untold death and destruction. Stuff blows up real cool, so at least it’s not boring—just pretty dumb. Rated PG-13

by Michael Apted. It didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t take long for that hope to disappear entirely as I slogged my way through this morass of mediocrity. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not the worst movie Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve seen this year, but it may be the most tedious, clunkiest and dullest. OK, once again I should clarify that the source books were not a part of my childhood, and I find the whole crypto-Christian aspect tiresome, simplistic and of dubious theological value. In short, I am not the audience for these movies. I loathed the first one, but I didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t really mind the second one. This one is kind of back to square one, though Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m hard-pressed to work up the energy to actively loathe it. Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s say I passively dislike it and let it go at that. This time â&#x20AC;&#x201D; presumably following the dictates of the books â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the older children in the Pevensie brood have been packed off to the U.S. for the duration of World War II, leaving smugly pious Lucy (Georgie Henley) and the more tractable Edmund (Skandar Keynes) in England. The blitz may be bad, but their cousin Eustace (Will Poulter, Son of Rambow) is worse. He is not only irritable and rude, but he has no imagination whatsoever, which, in terms of these movies, means he has no belief. And as the film insists, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Without our belief, we have nothing.â&#x20AC;? Naturally, Eustace has a lesson to learn. And thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going to happen when he and the younger Pevensies are somewhat arbitrarily whisked back to Narnia and hauled out of the ocean by Prince Caspian (Ben Barnes), who is aboard the good ship Dawn Treader. The plot moves in fits and starts â&#x20AC;&#x201D; which is actually the way the whole movie works â&#x20AC;&#x201D; but essentially involves Caspian and his English comrades heading out to collect seven swords that have to be placed on Aslanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s table. Why seven? In keeping with the mystical seven, I guess: seven days of the week, seven deadly sins, seven voyages of Sinbad, seven brides for seven brothers etc. (Bonus points for getting the reference.) And why do they have to be laid on Aslanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s table? Maybe he needs them for a dinner party. In any case, collecting these pig-stickers is the plot. Now, since thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not much of a plot, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fleshed out with Lucy and Edmund being tempted to stray from the path. In Lucyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s case, this is some kind of sexual awakening where she wants to be her more attractive sister. In Edmundâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s occasional visions of the White Witch (Tilda â&#x20AC;&#x153;Just sign my checkâ&#x20AC;? Swinton) tempting him to eat her Turkish delight (so to speak). Then, of course, nasty Eustace has to learn the errors of his rational ways, which consists of having him turned into a ho-hum CGI dragon and bonding with the CGI rodent named Reepicheep from the previous movie (here voiced by Simon Pegg rather than Eddie Izzard). Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s about as exciting as it sounds â&#x20AC;&#x201D; maybe less so. Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s it all in the service of â&#x20AC;&#x201D; apart from setting up the next entry? Well, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not entirely clear on that. When Aslan (Christ as a CGI lion) shows up at the climax, he tells Lucy that the whole reason for all this is so that she will understand that in her world he is â&#x20AC;&#x153;known by another name.â&#x20AC;? If thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s what this was all about, there must have been an easier â&#x20AC;&#x201D; certainly less lengthy â&#x20AC;&#x201D; way to convey

startingfriday BLACK SWAN

See review in â&#x20AC;&#x153;Cranky Hanke.â&#x20AC;?

THE FIGHTER

See review in â&#x20AC;&#x153;Cranky Hanke.â&#x20AC;?

HOW DO YOU KNOW

James L. Brooks hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t made a movie since Spanglish in 2004, and hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t had a hit since As Good as It Gets in 1997. Now he is back with a new romantic comedy starring Reese Witherspoon, Paul Rudd, Owen Wilson and Jack Nicholson. Witherspoon is a woman who finds herself torn between a nice corporate guy (Paul Rudd), who just might be going to jail, and her boorish pro-baseball-playing boyfriend (Owen Wilson). Jack Nicholson is on hand as Ruddâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lawyer. The trailer looks somewhere between so-so and uninspired. The only review out there right now is a pan from David Edelstein in New York Magazine. The romcom pickings are kind-of lean at the moment, so it will get a box-office boost on that score alone. (R)

TRON LEGACY

So here we are 28 years later and the folks at Disney have come up with a sequel to Tron â&#x20AC;&#x201D; presumably to cash in on â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;80s nostalgia. This round, Kevin Flynnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s (Jeff Bridges) son, Sam (Garrett Hedlund, Death Sentence), finds himself sucked into the same video-game world where dadâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been stuck since the last movie. Dad, of course,

is there, too. Naturally, the duo will have to battle all manner of computer jiggerypokery in their efforts to find their way back to the real world. Somewhat surprisingly, the film currently has a 64-percent approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes, but in many instances, one might consider the sources carefully. (PG) Early review samples: â&#x20AC;˘ â&#x20AC;&#x153;With a million times more computing power at its disposal than its 1982 predecessor, Tron: Legacy still looks like Disco Night at the jai alai fronton.â&#x20AC;? (David Edelstein, New York Magazine) â&#x20AC;˘ â&#x20AC;&#x153;While 21st-century effects and a cutting-edge dance score make this a stunning virtual ride, the underlying concept feels as far-fetched as ever.â&#x20AC;? (Peter DeBruge, Variety)

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specialscreening Fanny and Alexander JJJJJ

Director: Ingmar Bergman Players: Pernilla Allwin, Bertil Guve, BĂśrje Ahlstedt, Allan Edwall, Gunn WĂĽllgren, Erland Josephson Drama Rated R For their last film of the year (no shows on Christmas or New Yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Eve), World Cinema is bringing back Ingmar Bergmanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Fanny and Alexander (1982) â&#x20AC;&#x201D; Bergmanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s last theatrical film and one of his best. Read my earlier review of the film â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a look into the lives of a prosperous Swedish family in 1907 â&#x20AC;&#x201D; here: http://www.mountainx.com/movies/review/ fanny_and_alexander. reviewed by Ken Hanke Classic Cinema From Around the World will present Fanny and Alexander at 8 p.m. Friday, Dec. 17, at Courtyard Gallery, 109 Roberts St., in the Phil Mechanic Studios building, River Arts District. Info: 273-3332.

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mountainx.com â&#x20AC;˘ DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 79

it. When all is said and done, Narnia isn’t a terribly compelling world and its inhabitants are either ridiculous (the race of one-legged whatevers) or alternately annoying or cloying (Reepicheep). Worse, the story this round has the huge drawback of lacking a solid villain at its center. This latest entry is the kind of movie that plays like a spoof of its own genre. Unfortunately, there aren’t many laughs — intended or otherwise. Rated PG for some frightening images and sequences of fantasy action. reviewed by Ken Hanke Playing at Carmike 10, The Carolina Asheville Cinema 14, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande.

The Fighter JJJJ

Director: David O. Russell (I Heart Huckabees) Players: Mark Wahlberg, Christian Bale, Amy Adams, Melissa Leo, Mickey O’Keefe, Jack McGee Biographical Boxing Drama Rated R

The Story The real-life story of boxer “Irish” Mickey Ward and his rise to fame against all odds — including the help of his family. The Lowdown: A good, creatively made boxing biopic that never breaks through into actual greatness, despite fine work from Mark Wahlberg and Amy Adams. Co-producer/star Mark Wahlberg’s long-

gestating biopic about boxer Mickey Ward finally makes it to the screen with David O. Russell — who directed Wahlberg in I Heart Huckabees back in 2004 and in Three Kings in 1999 — at the helm. The result is a good film that works better than it should, but falls short of greatness. The movie is simply up against an inherent problem: It’s a fairly typical underdog-boxing story that never offers much in the way of surprise. Yes, it’s complicated by its dysfunctional-family aspect, but even that is as old as Rouben Mamoulian’s Golden Boy (1939). And while David O. Russell brings his considerable cinematic flair to the proceedings, I never felt that Russell was all that engaged by the material. The film simply never overcomes the limitations of its genre. It’s firmly entrenched — no matter how real it all is — in the realm of boxing-movie basic. In some ways, that’s not entirely a downside. That basic formula has always worked and it works an audience. Of course, it helps that boxing is far and away the most cinematic — and cinematically satisfying — of all sports. Wahlberg plays “Irish” Mickey Ward, and he’s exceptionally good in the role. In fact, Mickey and his barmaid girlfriend Charlene Fleming (Amy Adams) are the most honest, heartfelt and underplayed characters in the movie. The rest — including Christian Bale’s much-praised and undeniably very busy performance — tend to be more like caricatures, with their working-class Massachusetts accents and clannish mentality. In a lot of ways, that’s understandable, since movies are

filmsociety The Boat That Rocked (Pirate Radio) JJJJJ

Director: Richard Curtis (Love Actually) Players: Philip Seymour Hoffman, Bill Nighy, Nick Frost, Rhys Ifans, Tom Sturridge, Gemma Arterton Quasi-Historical Comedy With Music Rated R Here we have the Asheville Film Society’s Christmas special: Richard Curtis’ The Boat That Rocked (2009), which played in the U.S. in an abbreviated and re-edited form as Pirate Radio. This is the first — and possibly the only — time that Curtis’ original version has been shown in the area. If you liked Pirate Radio, chances are excellent that you’ll like The Boat That Rocked even better. Not only is it about 20 minutes longer than the version we saw theatrically last year — which, among other things, expands the range of music on the soundtrack — but the film is often edited quite differently and some of the musical choices have been changed. Yes, it’s still the fictionalized story of the shipboard pirate-radio station Radio Caroline that provided rock music banned by the BBC to an eager audience, but it’s a richer film experience in this form. The Asheville Film Society will screen The Boat That Rocked Tuesday, Dec. 21, at 8 p.m. in the Cinema Lounge of The Carolina Asheville. Hosted by Xpress movie critics Ken Hanke and Justin Souther. Hanke is the artistic director of the Asheville Film Society.

The Magician JJJJJ

Director: Rex Ingram Players: Paul Wegener, Alice Terry, Iván Petrovich, Firmin Gémier, Gladys Hamer, Henry Wilson Horror Rated NR Rex Ingram’s The Magician (1926) takes place of pride as being the first American horror film that doesn’t feel the need to offer up a rational explanation for its supernatural content. It also happens to be one of Ingram’s best films — and the film that had perhaps more direct influence on the Universal horror pictures of the 1930s than any other. For years, The Magician was considered a lost film, and then a film that was simply hard to see. Well, it’s been cleaned up and outfitted with a musical score (mostly cribbed from the classical music on some of the Universal horrors). Now this wild tale of a mad alchemist/magician (Paul Wegener) and his attempts to create a homunculus with the “heart blood of a maiden” (Alice Terry) is very much among us — in all its stylish splendor — taking its rightful place as one of the key horror movies. The Thursday Horror Picture Show will screen The Magician Thursday, Dec. 16, at 8 p.m. in the Cinema Lounge of The Carolina Asheville. Hosted by Xpress movie critics Ken Hanke and Justin Souther. For Cranky Hanke’s full reviews of these movies, visit www.mountainx.com/movies.

to some degree written in shorthand. Still, Mickey’s mother, Alice Ward (Melissa Leo), and his brace of harpy half-sisters never seem quite real. When they’re played for comedy, it works. Otherwise, they’re more of a distraction than anything. The film is undoubtedly clever in terms of its construction, starting with following an HBO crew of documentarians making a TV film about Mickey’s half-brother Dicky Ecklund (Bale), the one-time “Pride of Lowell,” who was once in a fight where he knocked down Sugar Ray Leonard. Dicky has been living on this highlight ever since — all the while spiraling into crack addiction, a situation his mother chooses to ignore. Instead, she sees Dicky training Mickey as little more than an extension of favored-son Dicky’s personal glory. What none of the family — save possi-

80 DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 • mountainx.com

bly Mickey — seem to realize is that the HBO film has less to do with Dicky as the “Pride of Lowell” than Dicky as the crack addict. The premiere of the HBO film is really the turning point for Mickey and for The Fighter. As outraged as the family is over the film, it’s simply no longer possible for them to deny that Dicky — who has been tossed into prison for a series of offenses and a long history of arrests — has a problem. For Mickey, who had given up boxing after his hand was broken in the same arrest that sent Dicky to jail, it’s the impetus to finally become his own man and a fighter in his own right rather than an extension of his brother. This is where The Fighter moves into a crowd-pleasing boxing picture, which is actually where it’s on its firmest footing — even if both the outcome and the complications are never in doubt, whether or not

you know anything about the real-life events. It’s obvious that everyone involved was meaning for The Fighter to be something more than a boxing picture — and I almost think they tried too hard. That’s certainly my take on Christian Bale’s bag of twitches and mannerisms that fuel his portrayal of Dicky. It’s showy and flashy and, for me, typically gimmicky. What Bale doesn’t seem to realize is that all his histrionics don’t have nearly the impact of Wahlberg’s quiet intensity. When Bale has a furious outburst, it’s just more of the same. When Wahlberg erupts into a fury, it’s riveting. In that regard, Wahlberg manages to edge the film a little closer to that “something more,” and it’s not his fault that it never quite gets there. Rated R for language throughout, drug content, some violence and sexuality. reviewed by Ken Hanke Starts Friday at The Carolina Asheville Cinema 14, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande.

The Tourist JJJ

Director: Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck (The Lives of Others) Players: Johnny Depp, Angelina Jolie, Paul Bettany, Timothy Dalton, Steven Berkoff, Rufus Sewell Would-be Romantic Thriller Rated PG-13

The Story An American tourist meets a mysterious woman on a train and finds himself plunged into a web of intrigue. The Lowdown: It ought to be an effervescent bottle of Veuve Clicquot champagne, but this supposed romantic thriller is more flat ginger ale than anything else. Neither the stars nor the scenery can save it from tedium. It looked suspicious when Columbia managed to pull off an almost complete review blackout until opening day for Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck’s The Tourist. When the generally blistering reviews did appear, it seemed to be a case of “suspicions confirmed.” Is it really that bad? No, instead it’s that indifferent, which is somehow more distressing, especially considering the talent involved. Bad would at least indicate the possibility of some kind of failed effort. The Tourist shows little sign of any sort of effort at all. Conceptually, The Tourist ought to have worked. Having Johnny Depp play Frank Tupelo, an American tourist on a train to Venice who becomes involved with mysterious femme fatale Elise Clifton-Ward (Angelina Jolie), seems like a natural. So do most of the story’s embellishments. Unbeknownst to Frank, Elise has been instructed to become involved with someone like him by her on-therun boyfriend, the elusive Alexander Pierce (played by we’re never sure who — for reasons that become obvious). The idea being that Frank, who is roughly Pierce’s size and build, will throw off the British agents who are on Pierce’s trail. However, the British agents who are in pursuit of Pierce for back taxes on the several billion pounds he pinched from gangster Reginald Shaw (Steven Berkoff) are but a minor annoyance compared to Shaw himself. He — not surprisingly — wants more than

money. Now all that has the makings of a good Hitchcockian romantic thriller. At the very least, it ought to play out like a slick imitation of a Stanley Donen film, like Charade (1963). The sad fact is that it’s not in the same universe. It has one actual stylish sequence — the big ballroom scene, specifically Depp and Jolie’s dance — and a lot of pretty scenery. Beyond that? Well, there’s just not much there. Jolie is her typical “gaze upon my beauty” self, which is to say she is hot and she knows it and in her mind that’s quite enough. Depp seems almost as perplexed by how to play Frank as the character is by the situation in which he finds himself. Indeed, Depp is so toned down that he is almost not there. The biggest problem is the screenplay by Donnersmarck, Christopher McQuarrie (Valkyrie) and the usually reliable Julian Fellowes (The Young Victoria). It errs in thinking that the plot is the most important thing in a movie of this kind. The upshot is a dearth of characterization, actual romance and witty banter for both the stars and the supporting cast. There is no discernible chemistry between Depp and Jolie, but the fact that they’ve been given so little to work with isn’t a help. Steven Berkoff’s Shaw is supposed to be a villain of almost James Bond proportions. If only. Paul Bettany fares somewhat better, but only because he decides to chew the scenery, which injects some badly needed life into the proceedings. It’s then left to Timothy Dalton to walk in at the end of the picture exuding savoir faire and contemptuously yank the movie out from beneath everyone in a display of genuine coolness. I suppose the biggest shock for a lot of people lies in seeing the much-vaunted director of The Lives of Others (2006) fall flat on his face with his English-language debut. Looked at realistically, it’s not all that surprising, but then I never thought The Lives of Others was the masterpiece others did. However, it’s mostly a case of a miscast director. It’s clear early on that Donnersmarck has absolutely no feel for this kind of movie. This isn’t a film and it certainly isn’t cinema. It’s a movie, a bit of entertainment. It should feel weightless and effortless. Instead, it’s a dull slog of pretty people and images conveying nothing. Rated PG-13 for violence and brief strong language. reviewed by Ken Hanke Playing at The Carolina Asheville Cinema 14, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande, United Artists Beaucatcher Cinema 7.

Follow Mountain Xpress on Facebook at www.facebook.com/mountainx for local events, news & ticket giveaways!

lookhere Don’t miss out on Cranky Hanke’s online-only weekly columns “Screening Room” and “Weekly Reeler,” plus extended reviews of special showings, the “Elitist Bastards Go to the Movies” podcast, as well as an archive of past Xpress movie reviews — all at mountainx. com/movies.

mountainx.com • DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 81

marketplace realestate

Classiﬁed Advertising Sales Team: • Tim Navaille: 828-251-1333 ext.111, tnavaille@mountainx.com • Rick Goldstein: 828-251-1333 ext.123, rgoldstein@mountainx.com • Arenda Manning: 828-251-1333 ext. 138, amanning@mountainx.com

j]flYdk t jggeeYl]k t Yffgmf[]e]flk t eaf\$ Zg\q$ khajal t [dYkk]k ogjck`ghk temka[aYfk p[`Yf_] t h]l p[`Yf_] t Ymlgeglan] t kYd]k t Y\mdl Going Green: A weekly Energy & Money Saving Tip

The FAQs p.82

About Green Building by Jake Sadler

jobs

The great tree debate What type of tree is most environmentally friendly?

p.84

home

improvement

Fresh cut: Western North Carolina is nationally renowned for “ho-ho bush” production, which supports local farms. That means transportation impacts aren’t felt as much here, and trees can easily be recycled. But pesticides are used, which run-off into our headwaters and streams.

MANUFACTURED RENTAL HOME FOR SALE Rental Home for Sale: $155,000. Renters in place till late Spring. 3BR,2.5BA on 1/2 Acre in established development. 828-301-1050. charming_wx@yahoo.com

Artiﬁcial: can be used year after year, purchased by U.S. producers, be donated, and made from plant-based plastics. But many fake trees are made in Asia and/or from petroleum-based products; they take centuries to be degrade in landﬁlls.

p.86

crossword

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Living: a great option for those who enjoy keeping plants year round, with many of the beneﬁts of a fresh-cut tree, but can be used for many years! They do require maintenance, however, and many popular tree species are very hard to grow in containers. Create your own: A less-frequent option is to create your own tree. Explore your crafty side, gather some recycled materials, and construct your own tree for the holidays!

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3BR/2BA CONDO.WEST ASHEVILLE Biltmore Commons Condo. 3B/2BA. New carpet, paint and tile. End unit, secure, private, with deck and screened in porch. $185,000. contact:brdkth@gmail.com

Land For Sale LAND LIQUIDATION 20 acres, $0 down, $99/month. Only $12,900. Near growing El Paso, Texas. Guaranteed owner financing, no credit checks. Money back guarantee. Free Map/pictures. 866-257-4555. www.sunsetranches.com (AAN CAN)

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BEAUTIFUL NEW CONSTRUCTION • 3BR/2BA, 1560 sq.ft. 24 Vista St. Garage, basement. Hardwood, tile, carpet, stainless appliances, fans, on cul de sac, with several new houses. Reynolds schools. Priced to sell at $207,000. MLS listing, 3% to buyers agent. Vacant, show any time. Kathy and Tom Yurchenco 299-7502.

10%-50% • SAVE ON HOME HEATING Experience immediate savings with home weatherization and insulation. • Energy rebate. • Free home inspection: (828) 283-2675. MAYBERRY HEATING AND COOLING INC • Service • Repairs • Replacements AC/Heat Pumps • Gas/Oil Furnaces • New Construction/Renovations • Gas piping. • Visa/MC/Discover. (828) 658-9145.

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CLEANING & ORGANIZATION SERVICES Holiday Cleaning Specials • New Years Organization Projects. Provided by a trustworthy and reliable person. Hope2010nc@hotmail.com 276-870-8116.

CHRISTOPHER’S COMPUTERS • Computer Slow? Call Christopher’s Computers at 828-670-9800 and let us help you with PC and Macintosh issues: networking, virus/malware removal, tutoring, upgrades, custom-built new computers, etc. ChristophersComputers.com

General Services HOME WATER LEAKS A Problem? Excellent leak detection! Lasting correction! Experience! References! Call 828-273-5271.

Handy Man HIRE A HUSBAND Handyman Services. 30 years professional experience. Quality, reliability. References available. Free estimates. $2 million liability insurance. Stephen Houpis, (828) 280-2254. RELIABLE REPAIRS! Quality work! All types maintenance/repair, indoor/outdoor. • Excellent water leak detection/correction! • Wind damaged shingle/roof repair! 38 years experience! Responsible! Honest! Harmonious! References! Call Brad, you’ll be Glad! (828) 273-5271.

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Caregivers COMPANION • CAREGIVER • LIVE-IN Alzheimer’s experienced. • CarePartners Hospice recommended. • Nonsmoker, with cat, seeks live-in position. • References. • Arnold, (828) 273-2922.

Commercial Listings

Commercial Property HENDERSONVILLE. Urban flex space on historic 7th Ave. Live, work. 9,000 sq. ft. for only $405,000. Bank owned. G/M Property Group 828-281-4024,

Commercial/Busi ness Rentals $265 AFFORDABLE WORK SPACE Views of Town Mountain. Available immediately! Please call 828333-2131 for showings. CREATIVE SPACE FOR RENT Anam Cara Collective has the perfect space for rent for rehearsals, workshops, small performances, classes and more! 828-545-3861 or ehuntley11@yahoo.com GREAT OFFICE SPACE Fully furnished office space. South Asheville. Space can be broken into 500, 1000, 1500 square feet. $10/$13 per sq ft. murray33@charter.net 828-712-7685. murray33@charter.net OFFICES FOR RENT IN BLACK MOUNTAIN Various sizes and prices from $200 to $275 a month, including utilities. Five offices total. Shared waiting room. Call 828-271-4004

1, 2, 3 BEDROOM APARTMENTS From $525$1500. • Huge selection! • Pet friendly. (828) 251-9966. Alpha-Real-Estate.com

2BR, 1BA SOUTH • 30 Dawnwood. Central heat and A/C, patio. $595/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com

1BA/STUDIO • 85 Merrimon. Fall Special! All utilities included. $500/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com

2BR, 1BA • Great location, Royal Pines area. Refinished hardwood floors. Water and trash pick-up included in rent. $550/month + security deposit. 828-685-8747 or 828-230-9093.

1BR, 1BA DOWNTOWN • 68 N. French Broad, $625/month. Hardwood floors, nice view. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 1BR, 1BA EAST • 7 Violet Hills. Coin Op laundry, pets ok. $535/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 1BR, 1BA HENDERSONVILLE • 2010 Laurel Park. Private entry, coin-op laundry. $510/month. 828-693-8069. www.leslieandassoc.com 1BR, 1BA HENDERSONVILLE • 827 4th Ave, $445/month. Hardwood floors, Pets okay. 828-693-8069. www.leslieandassoc.com 1BR, 1BA NORTH • 12 Golf. $655/month, Hardwood floors, sunporch. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 1BR, 1BA NORTH • 272 Edgewood, $520/month. Close to UNCA, Patio. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 1BR, 1BA NORTH • 365 Weaverville Hwy. $485/month. W/D hookups, carport. 828253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 1BR, 1BA SOUTH • 30 Allen. Patio, A/C, heatpump, $545/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 2BR, 1-2BA NORTH • 265 Charlotte St. Hardwood floors, dishwasher. $685$860/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 2BR, 1.5 BA NORTH • 16 Glenway. $730/month. Dishwasher, garage. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 2BR, 1.5BA NORTH • 30 Clairmont. A/C, great location. Coin-op laundry. $635/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com

2BR, 2BA NORTH • 27 Spooks Mill. Deck, mountain views. $975/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 2BR/1BA NORTH 20 Brookdale. A/C, W/D hookups. $595/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 3BR, 2BA ARDEN • 8202 Terra. A/C, walk-in closet. $795/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 3BR/1BA NORTH Westall Apts. great location, W/D hookups. $725/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com CANDLER • Large 2BR, lots of closet space. Electric heat, water provided $550/month. Call 828-253-0758. Carver Realty. EFFICIENCY APARTMENT • 1BR/1BA, Haw Creek. Quiet neighborhood near cul-desac, convenient to town. 450 sq.ft. Excellent condition. Ceramic tile bath, kitchen, carpeted livingroom/bedroom. Closet space, extra storage. W/D, electric, cable included. No smokers, no pets, no drugs. Security deposit, references. $485/month. 828-298-0337. SOUTH • Forestdale. 1BR, 1BA. D/W, storage. $590/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com SPACIOUS APARTMENT, MIDTOWN ASHEVILLE Great location, hardwood floors. $975 per month includes utilities, washer/dryer . Call or email for appointment. 252-8718, jtferree@mac.com

Apartments For Rent

2BR, 1.5BA NORTH • 47 Albemarle. $845/month. Fireplace, deck. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com

1BR, 1BA HENDERSONVILLE • 1225 Highland, $475. Hardwood Floors, Elevator. 828-693-8069. www.leslieandassoc.com

2BR, 1BA NORTH • 42 Gracelyn. Porch, heat included. $795/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com

STUDIO IN GREAT GROVE PARK NEIGHBORHOOD This 450 sq.ft. studio is within minutes from downtown and Grove Park Inn. There is a window a/c unit, 3 closets, outside entrance. We have on site laundry facilities and are on the bus line. Rental is $475 and inc. water. Application fee is $30.00. Call Beverly at 828 712-5671 for appointment. 828 712-5671 justabjk@msn.com

1-BR, 1BA SOUTH • 90 Beale St. Central heat/AC, dishwasher. $565/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com

2BR, 1BA NORTH • 91 Edwin. $775/month. Great location, Central AC. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com

WEST-ACTON WOODS APTS • 2BR, 2BA, 1100 sq.ft. $775/month. Includes water and garbage pickup. Call 2530758. Carver Realty.

Rentals

Condos/ Townhomes For Rent 1BR, 1BA CONDO • CONVENIENT EASTWOOD VILLAGE Available now. Sunny 800 sqft w/upgrades, $700/month. 1 year lease. • Pet friendly • No smokers. Call (828) 545-7445. 2BR, 2.5BA WEST • 445 Sandhill. $995/month. Hardwood floors, fireplace. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com

Homes For Rent $1800 • 4BR, 2.5BA Beautiful Ranch, downtown Weaverville. Wooded backyard w/stream. Available today. Rent or Lease to own. (828) 275-4037. 1ST CALL US! 2, 3 and 4BR homes from $700-2500. • Pet friendly. • Huge selection! (828) 251-9966 Alpha-RealEstate.com 2BR, 1BA BRICK HOME • 5 minutes to downtown Asheville. $550/month + security deposit. Call David, 828-777-0385. 2BR, 1BA WEST • 37 Sandhill. Yard, basement. $925/month. $925/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 2BR, 2.5BA OAKLEY • 20 Lamar. Deck, fenced yard. $1,015/month. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 2BR, 2BA NORTH • 68 Murdock. $945/month. Basement, fenced yard. 828253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com 3BR, BA EAST ASHEVILLE In Beverly Hills neighborhood East Asheville. Close to I 240. Quiet, convenient neighborhood. Hardwood floors throughout, finished basement and deck. Private lot with trees and privacy. 828-242-2767

3BR, 1BA RENOVATED FARMHOUSE • Only 20 minutes to Asheville/Barnardsville. On 4 acres with gorgeous trout stream. Great garden space available. No pets. Unfurnished $1095/month, furnished $1295/month. Available immediately. Call (828) 231-1692 Joan Naylor.

Vacation Rentals

3BR, 3BA NORTH • 28 Wild Cherry, $1,185/month. Basement, porch. 828-253-1517. www.leslieandassoc.com

BEAUTIFUL LOG CABIN Sleeps 5, handicap accessible. Near Warren Wilson College, Asheville, NC. (828) 231-4504 or 277-1492. bennie14@bellsouth.net

BUNGALOW • HAW CREEK Excellent condition: 2BR, 1BA, den, full basement, hardwood floors, WD. Gas heat. $795/month plus deposit. 298-1227.

A BEACH HOUSE AT FOLLY 20 minutes from historic downtown Charleston, SC. • The legendary dog-friendly Rosie’s Ocean View and Kudzu’s Cottage, across the street from the beach!Visit www.kudzurose.com or call (404) 617-1146.

Roommates ALL AREAS ROOMMATES.COM. Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: http://www.Roommates.com. (AAN CAN)

CENTRAL REAL ESTATE SERVICES AVAILABLE • Rentals • Rental Management • Sales • Listings. • The City Solution! 828.210.2222. AshevilleCityRealEstate.com LOG HOME FOR RENT EAST ASHEVILLE 1200sqft Nice deck/porch/garage Central HVAC built 1998 2BR/2BA. Hwy70 near I40 exit 55. Pictures online. Call Mike 828-423-6251. mikeberlin@bclip.com SWANNANOA • 2BR, heat pump, near Warren Wilson College. $700/month. Call 828-253-0758. Carver Realty. WALK TO TOWN, GREAT VIEWS, NEWLY REMODELED 3BR, 1BA BUNGALOW New counters, stove, cabinets, hardwood floors, new carpet in bedrooms, and tile in the bath. W/D. $950/month. hartwell.carson@gmail.com WEST 2BR, 1BA • Hardwood floors, heat pump. $650/month. Call 253-0758. Carver Realty.

Don’t see what you’re looking for? Please go to www.mountainx.com for additional listings. ROOMMATES.COM • Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of a mouse! Visit http://www.roommates.com. (AAN CAN)

Employment

General $$$HELP WANTED$$$ Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operators Now! 1-800-4057619 EXT 2450 http://www.easyworkgreatpay.com (AAN CAN) CAB DRIVERS Needed at Blue Bird; call JT 258-8331. Drivers needed at Yellow Cab; call Buster at 253-3311.

EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITIES • Call (828) 225-6122 or visit: biltmore.com HIRE QUALITY EMPLOYEES “Our employment advertisements with the Mountain Xpress garner far more educated and qualified applicants than any other publication we have used. The difference is visible in the phone calls, applications and resumes.” Howard Stafford, Owner, Princess Anne Hotel. • Thank you, Howard. Your business can benefit by advertising for your next employee in Mountain Xpress Classifieds. Call 251-1333.

KITCHEN DELIVERY AID • Do you have experience in food service? Would you like to work Monday-Friday with an organization dedicated to helping children succeed? Eliada Homes is in search of someone to assist in our kitchen. Duties would include stocking, cleaning, assisting with food preparation as needed, and packing and delivering food to all areas of our 200 acre campus. Must be 21 or older with a clean driving record. Hours are Monday-Friday from approximately 9am-2:30pm, and job pays minimum wage. Please send in a copy of your resume to eweaver@eliada.org LOGISTICS COORDINATOR EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITY AT LANDMARK LEARNING Grounds maintenance and equipment/inventory management for local training service. On-line retail sales. Send current resume and letter of intent.

Local Drivers Needed Professional Transportation, Inc. is seeking local drivers for 7-passenger mini-vans in the Asheville, NC area. Drug screen, driving record and criminal background check required.

1-800-471-2440, Reference 168 or online at www.professionaltransportationinc.com mountainx.com

• DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010

PAID IN ADVANCE Make $1,000 a Week mailing brochures from home! Guaranteed Income! FREE Supplies! No experience required. Start Immediately! www.homemailerprogram.net (AAN CAN)

Skilled Labor/ Trades MASTER DECORATIVE PAINTER AND CRAFTSMEN Master decorative painter and craftsman recently relocated to Asheville and looking for local work. I specialize in fine decorative finishes, e.g., Italian plasters, multilayer glazing, faux stone and wood graining, as well as furniture and cabinetry refinishing. I have worked throughout the US and have an extensive portfolio and website. Sean Catinella seancstudio@gmail.com www.seancstudio.com. 828-423-3023 seancstudio@gmail.com www.seancstudio.com

Administrative/ Office ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT FOR NONPROFIT Part-time in Weaverville. Please see job description and application instructions at www.aflnc.org/employment. Applications must be received by 12/24/10.

MUNICIPAL BILLING CLERK The Woodfin Sanitary Water & Sewer District is now accepting applications for the position of Billing Clerk. This is a full-time position with benefits. Applicants should have experience in customer service, handling cash, entering data, and similar administrative responsibilities. Strong computer skills are required. A complete job description and application for employment can be obtained at www.woodfinwater.com or in person at 122 Elkwood Avenue, Asheville, NC. Resumes will be accepted; however, all candidates must complete a District application. Resumes received without a completed application will be rejected. All applications must be received by December 23, 2010. Completed applications can be mailed to: WSWSD, PO Box 8452, Asheville NC 28814, or scanned and sent via e-mail to frontdesk@woodfinwater.com with “billing clerk” in the subject heading.The Woodfin Sanitary Water & Sewer District is an Equal Opportunity Employer.

Salon/ Spa A STYLIST Needed for the Holidays and beyond in a busy North Asheville salon. • Organic products with a serene atmosphere. • Call The Water Lily Wellness Salon, 505-3288, swing by 7 Beaverdam Road, or send resume to info@waterlilysalon.com

Sales/ Marketing ATTENTION The largest senior financial planning team in the Country is interviewing professional Salespeople for a recession proof career. • Training Provided • 4-6 Leads provided daily • Most competitive products in the industry • Monthly bonuses • Advanced commissions • First Year potential income $40-$60K! • To schedule an interview, call Kim: (828) 6841477. Learn more at www.amerilife.com COMMUNICATIONS INTERNSHIP: SOCIAL MEDIA AMBASSADOR FOR WORLD PEACE Downtown agency in need of interns to assist in office administration, PR communications and event production. For details visit: www.sensiblecity.com

JOIN THE ECOMOM TEAM We are successful Moms who are choosing to work an ecofriendly marketing business from home. We are looking for associates in the WNC area.Visit southeastappalachianecoteam .com or call 828-246-3776.

Hotel/ Hospitality FRONT DESK STAFF NEEDED AT DOWNTOWN INN Desk Clerks needed at Downtown Inn. Most be flexible for 1st and 2nd shift. Apply at 120 Patton Ave. jolinerobinson@hotmail.com downtowninnandsuites.com

GIVENS ESTATES ACCEPTING CNA APPLICATIONS Givens Estates hiring CNAs for 1st shift (6a-2p). $9.50 entry and up DOE. 771-2230. ahstaton@givensestates.org www.givensestates.org

Human Services CAREGIVER • CNA POSITIONS The world’s trusted source of non-medical home care and companionship services,

Medical/ Health Care CLINIC ASSISTANT FOR HOLISTIC MEDICAL PRACTICE Family to Family seeks a full-time Clinic Assistant. This person will be responsible for answering and triaging phone calls, scheduling patients, ordering diagnostic testing, assisting the physician and following up on patient care. 2 years of medical office experience is required, including CPT/ICD-9 coding. Customer service experience and familiarity with the language and philosophy of both conventional and alternative medicine appreciated. Email cover letter and resume together to hr@familytofamily.org

Join Our Web Team!

including personal care. Home Instead Senior Care. homeinstead.com/159

CHILD PSYCHIATRIST Families Together Inc. is now hiring for a child Psychiatrist. Families Together Inc. is a privately owned agency, providing mental health assessments to the Western North Carolina Community. Contact Dan Zorn, CEO at dzorn@familiestogether.net

Mountain Xpress is on a mission to empower our community using new media. We want to build awesome tools to make this happen. Do you have the ideas and web skills to help get us there? Know someone who does? If so, we want to hear from you.

FAMILIES TOGETHER INC. Due to continuous growth in WNC, Families Together, Inc is now hiring licensed

Skills needed: HTML, CSS, Javascript are needed, PHP and knowledge of Expression Engine would be a big bonus.

professionals and Qualified Professionals in Buncombe, McDowell, Madison,

Our web team is growing. As part of this team, you will be a central player in creating new initiatives to serve the WNC community.You will be working to bring multimedia, social media and communication tools to not only Xpress journalists, but the community as a whole.

Rutherford, Henderson, and Transylvania Counties. • Qualified candidates will include • LPC’s, LCSW’s, LMFT’s, LCAS’s, PLCSW’s, or LPCA’s and Bachelor’s and Master’s Qualified Professionals. • FTI provides a positive work environment, flexible hours, room for advancement, health benefits, and an innovative culture. •

Send cover letter, resume, links to your work, references and any questions you may have to webmaster@mountainx.com

www.mountainx.com 84

DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 •

mountainx.com

MAKE A DIFFERENCE NC Mentor is offering free informational meetings to those who are interested in becoming therapeutic foster parents. The meetings will be held on the 2nd Tuesday 6:30pm-7:30pm (snacks provided) and 4th Friday 12pm-1pm (lunch provided). • If you are interested in making a difference in a child’s life, please call Nicole at (828) 696-2667 ext 13 or e-mail Nicole: nicole.toto@thementornetwor k.com. • Become a Therapeutic Foster Family. • Free informational meeting. NC Mentor. 120C Chadwick Square Court, Hendersonville, NC 28739.

www.familiestogether.net • Candidates should email resumes to humanresources@ familiestogether.net

QP TREATMENT SPECIALIST • Work within a day treatment setting to teach students behavioral, life and diagnosis management skills. Eliada Homes is seeking a full-time treatment specialist to work in the classroom setting. The QP takes a lead role in the creating individualized treatment plans and ensures that they are followed daily. Must be able to respond to crisis situations quickly and effectively. The QP Treatment Specialist must also lead therapeutic goal-based activities and groups with students. To qualify, you MUST meet QP standards in North Carolina and your experience must be with the target population (youth and adolescents with mental health diagnoses). Please email resume to eweaver@eliada.org QUALIFIED PROFESSIONAL #2735 Responsible for multiple residential homes/apartments in Henderson, Polk and Rutherford counties. • Develop, implement, document, monitor, and adjust Person Centered Plans; respond to concerns; conduct clinical reviews; utilize community resources; audits for accuracy; attend team meetings; rotating on-call. • BA/BS degree and 2-4 years post degree exp w/Developmental Disabilities and Mental Illness. EOE. Apply at www.MonarchNC.org• Jobs @MonarchNC.org

AVAILABLE POSITIONS • MERIDIAN BEHAVIORAL HEALTH Jackson County: Registered Nurse (RN) Assertive Community Treatment Team: Must have four years of psychiatric nursing experience. Please contact Kristy Whitaker, kristy.whitaker@ meridianbhs.org Cherokee County: Clinician Assertive Community Treatment Team: Must have Master’s degree and be license-eligible. Please contact Patty Bilitzke, patricia.bilitzke@ meridianbhs.org Clinician Recovery Education Center: Must have Master’s degree and be licenseeligible. Please contact Keith Christensen, keith.christensen@ meridianbhs.org Case Manager (QMHP) Recovery Education Center: Must have mental health degree and two years of experience working with adults with mental illness. Please contact Keith Christensen, keith.christensen@ meridianbhs.org Transylvania County: Team Leader Assertive Community Treatment Team: Must have Master’s degree and be license-eligible. Please contact Ben Haffey, ben.haffey@meridianbhs.org Registered Nurse (RN) Assertive Community Treatment Team: Must have four years of psychiatric nursing experience. Please contact Ben Haffey, ben.haffey@meridianbhs.org Licensed Clinical Addiction Specialist (LCAS) Assertive Community Treatment Team: Please contact Ben Haffey, ben.haffey@meridianbhs.org Qualified Mental Health Professional (QMHP) Assertive Community Treatment Team: Must have mental health degree and two years of experience working with adults with mental illness. Experience in Vocational Rehabilitation preferred. Please contact Ben Haffey, ben.haffey@meridianbhs.org Peer Support Specialist Recovery Education Center: Must have lived experience with mental health and/or substance abuse challenges and be at a place in one’s own recovery to give back to others. Please contact Caroline Bradford, caroline.bradford@ meridianbhs.org

Macon County: Case Manager (QMHP) Recovery Education Center: Must have mental health degree and two years of experience working with adults with mental illness. Please contact Candace Rawlinson, candace.rawlinson@ meridianbhs.org • For further information and to complete an application, visit our website: www.meridianbhs.org RESIDENTIAL COUNSELOR LIVE IN POSITION • UMAR, a non-profit specializing in Group Homes for adults with Developmental Disabilities is seeking caring team players for FT RC for 7-on, 7-off livein direct care positions in Hayesville. Pay range $810/hr based on experience and education. Excellent FT benefits. Valid drivers license, negative drug screen/criminal record/driving record check, and HS diploma or equivalent required. Fax resume to 704875-9276 or e-mail to Jobs@UMARinfo.com. EOE. SUBSTANCE ABUSE COUNSELOR Mountain Area Recovery Center is seeking Licensed Substance Abuse Counselors to fill positions in our Asheville and Clyde facilities. Please e-mail your resume to address below or fax to 828-252-9512. Equal Opportunity Employer rhonda.ingle@marc-otp.com WNC GROUP HOMES • Provides residential services for people with Autism and Developmental Disabilities. We are recruiting for 2 positions. • Full time awake 3rd shift at ICF-MR Group Home, 11pm-9am, 7 days on and 7 days off. • Full or part time position at DDA Group Home, includes 24 hour sleep over shift. Information about positions and application posted on-line at www.wncgrouphomes.org, or at 28 Pisgah View Ave Asheville NC, 28803. 828.274.8368. WNC Group Homes is proud to be a drug free workplace.

Caregivers/ Nanny CAREGIVER NEEDED For woman with mild handicap in caregivers home; ED very little personal care, FILLmostly reminders, healthy meals, social interaction, transportation. 734-8617.

Teaching/ Education CHAIR, VETERINARY MEDICAL TECHNOLOGY • Full-time, 12 months. Instruct all levels of courses assigned within the Veterinary Medical Technology curriculum. Planning, organizing, and directing the program to include program marketing, student recruitment and program accreditation. Supervise students in classroom lab and clinical practices environments. Develop teaching materials, activities, and handouts for each course. Perform assessment, planning, implementation, and evaluation activities to improve the instructional quality of the program. Provide supervision and instruction for both day and/or evening students as assigned. Maintain professional certification and seek opportunities for professional development. Perform duties as assigned by the division Dean. • Minimum Requirements: (1) Baccalaureate degree in Veterinary Medical Technology. (2) Five or more years experience as a Registered Veterinary Technician. (3) Knowledge and experience in clinical Veterinary Medical Technology which are appropriate for assigned responsibilities. (4) Knowledge of the standards and requirements of the North Carolina Board of Veterinary Medicine for the practice of Registered Veterinary Medical Technologists. (5) Unrestricted license to practice as a Registered Veterinary Technician in North Carolina (6) Ability to utilize computer technology to deliver classroom instruction and manage related activities. (7) Computer literacy skills and a willingness to teach online or hybrid courses. • Preferred Requirements: (1) One or more years experience teaching within a Veterinary Medical Technology program. • Salary Range: $55,116 $57,456 • Review Date: December 10, 2010 on completed applications, but opened until filled. Start Date: January 3, 2011. • To be considered for any position, applicants must submit a complete application package which includes; A-B Tech application, cover letter, two (2) completed reference forms, and unofficial college transcripts (if applicable for the position) It is the responsibility of the applicant to ensure all required documents are submitted. Positions are open until filled, and review of completed application packages will begin after the Review Date. www.abtech.edu/jobs/

INSTRUCTOR, EMERGENCY MEDICAL SCIENCE • Fulltime, 12 months / 27-32 clinical contact hours per week plus 5 office hours per week. • Duties: Ability to instruct all levels of courses assigned within the EMS curriculum with the primary responsibility being clinical instruction. Supervise students in classroom, lab and clinical environments. Develop teaching materials, activities, and handouts for each course. Participate in assessment, planning, implementation, and evaluation activities to improve the instructional quality of the program. Maintain professional certifications and seek opportunities for professional development. Perform duties as assigned by Department Chairperson. • Minimum Requirements: (1) AAS degree in Nursing. (2) Minimum of two years work experience as a registered nurse within a Hospital setting. (3) Current unrestricted license to practice as a registered nurse in NC. (4) Current adult, child, and Infant CPR certification for health care providers. (5) Current ACLS, PALS, ITLS certifications. (6) Basic knowledge of EMS profession and responsibilities. • Preferred Requirements: (1) Baccalaureate degree in Nursing or related field. (2) Minimum of two years work experience as a registered nurse within an ER setting. (3) Teaching experience at the college level. (4) Work experience in a pre-hospital environment (EMS setting). (5) Current ACLS, PALS, ITLS Instructor credentials. (6) Eligible for credentialing as a Level I EMS Instructor by NC Office of EMS. • Salary Range: Associate Degree = $50,544-$51,888, Bachelor Degree= $50,928-$53,856. Applications accepted until filled. Review of complete applications will begin December 14, 2010. • Starting Date: ASAP. • To be considered for any position at A-B Tech, applicants must submit a complete A-B Tech application, which includes two (2) completed reference forms, transcripts (if applicable) and a letter of application. It is the applicant’s responsibility to ensure the application contains all required documents. All requested information must be received by the deadline date. Incomplete applications may not be eligible for consideration. www.abtech.edu/jobs/ SCIENCE EDUCATOR FOR EARTH SCIENCE MUSEUM. Bachelor’s degree required. Science degree preferred. F/T. Must be excellent w/children, creative, organized, computer literate. Resume & cover letter to: currentmuseumjob@gmail.co m. No phone calls.

HEAD START • MORE AT FOUR TEACHER Seeking dedicated early childhood professional to join our high quality program. • Four year degree in Early Childhood Education and at least two years of related experience with pre-school children required. • BK license preferred. • Bi-lingual in Spanish-English a plus. Great Benefits! A valid North Carolina driver’s license required. • Must pass physical and background checks. Salary Range: $15/hour-$19/hour. • DOQ. • Send resume with cover letter and work references with telephone numbers to: Human Resources Manager 25 Gaston Street Asheville, NC 28801. Selected applicants will be contacted for an interview. Open until filled. EOE and DFWP.

Professional/ Management MPO DIRECTOR AND MPO TRANSPORTATION PLANNER • Openings at Regional Council. Responsible for administration of French Broad River MPO and coordination with Land-of-Sky RPO and other programs. Advanced degree and experience required. AICP, PE, or ASLA preferred. MPO Director starting salary range $50-55K. MPO Transportation Planner starting salary range $39-42K. Application deadline 5:00 pm December 21, 2010. Job description at www.landofsky.org. Completed application is required; form can be found on-line. E-mail, application, resume and cover letter to info@landofsky.org. Land-ofSky Regional Council, Asheville, NC. EOE

Employment Services EARN EXTRA INCOME • Easy work processing refunds from home on your computer. No experience needed! Great pay! FT/part-time. Start Mon. Call Now 1-800-568-7047. (AAN CAN) REGIONAL MYSTERY SHOPPER Regional Mystery Shopper Needed. You will be hired to conduct an all expenses paid surveys and evaluation exercises on behalf of BANNEST and earn $300.00 Per Survey. Email your resume to andrewshopper@ hotmail.com UNDERCOVER SHOPPERS Get paid to shop. Retail and dining establishments need undercover clients to judge quality and customer service. Earn up to $100/day. Please call 1-800-720-0576.

Announcements PREGNANT CONSIDERING ADOPTION? • Talk with caring agency specializing in matching birthmothers with families nationwide • Living expenses paid. Call 24/7 • Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions • 1-866-413-6293. (AAN CAN) WEST COAST Leave Dec 16. Two experienced drivers to share nonstop from Asheville to Sacramento/Southern Oregon. Your pet ok. bonniebabird@gmail.com

Classes & Workshops LATIN RHYTHM DANCE BEGINNER’S CLASSES • Rumba, Swing, Salsa. Private Instruction in Ballroom/Latin Dance. Perfect Gift Idea. Contact Latinrhythmdance@ gmail.com 703-346-7112.

Mind, Body, Spirit

PSYCHOTHERAPY Working with mind, body, and spirit for healing and growth. Sliding scale fee. First session free. Michelle Miller, M.S., N.C.C. mmhealingarts@yahoo.com, (828) 776-0576. www.mmhealingarts.com

Spiritual FOLLOW YOUR PASSION INTENSIVE - DECEMBER 27TH 10AM-6PM If you want to take bold new steps, let me show you my effective gameplan creation experience helping you live your passion. 732-917-0140. rpi@reflectionpond.com www.reflectionpond.com WILL YOU FIND THE ONE? Find out with a free psychic reading! 1-800-894-3798. www.keen.com (AAN CAN) XOLARTS HOLISTIC HEALING Certified holistic healing practitioner in the Andean Shamanic healing tradition offering subtle body therapy for illnesses. $100 per session. (828) 275-7851

Bodywork

Natural Alternatives

A HOLISTIC HEALING AND WELLNESS CENTER Therapeutic Massage, Ayurveda, and Energy Healing. $20 off first appointment! Lauren: Licensed Massage Therapist (#7219). Certified Holistic Educator, Healthy Lifestyle Coach. Downtown Asheville location. (828) 333-2717. No sensual/sexual inquiries.

HEALING HANDS ENERGY WORK • Renew Energy • Open Chakras • Crystal Healing. Please call or email to schedule an appointment. • Studio and Home appointments available. Blessings, Christina: (828) 337-5221. enerchi11@yahoo.com

LIKE BAMBOO THERAPEUTIC MASSAGE & YOGA • Therapeutic Yoga and Deep Holistic Massage inspired by Deep tissue, rhythmic Trager release, passive stretching and movement, Esalen, and ocean rhythms; Hot Stones and Spa treatments; Prenatal and Postpartum. Individuals and couples. Save $10 MonWed. 828-707-7507. info@likebamboo.com www.likebamboo.com MASSAGE/MLD Therapeutic Massage. Manual Lymph Drainage. Lymphedema Treatment. $45/hour or sliding scale for financial hardship. 17+ years experience. 828254-4110. NC License #146. www.uhealth.net SHOJI SPA & LODGE • 7 DAYS A WEEK Looking for the best therapist in town—- or a cheap massage? Soak in your outdoor hot tub; melt in our sauna; then get the massage of your life! 26 massage therapists. 299-0999. www.shojiretreats.com

Counseling Services EXPAND WITH TANTRABreathwork, Sacred Touch 828-989-0505

AUDIO ROBOT Competitive rates • 22’, 13’, and 10’ ceiling rooms • Seasoned engineer. • Avedis Preamps • Prism Converters (Abbey Road, Skywalker Ranch) • Telefunken and AEA microphones. • Also offering onsite recording. (828) 515-0500. audiorobotrecording.com LAKEHOUSE MUSIC Asheville’s only non-profit Recording Studio. • Recording • Mixing • Mastering • Video Production • Management • Marketing • Rehearsal Space. (828) 242-3573. pete@lakehousemusic.org

Equipment For Sale CALISTRO MUSIC WNC’s high-end Pro Audio consultation and sales. • Apogee • Adam • Chandler • Empirical Labs • API • Crane Song and many more! (828) 515-0500. Crate PX700DLX mixer and 2 P15 series speakers. Hardly used, $400. Price negotiable. (828) 253-2763.

Pet Xchange

Lost Pets A LOST OR FOUND PET? Free service. If you have lost or found a pet in WNC, post your listing here: www.lostpetswnc.org

Pet Services

Musical Services

ASHEVILLE PET SITTERS Dependable, loving care while you’re away. Reasonable rates. Call Sandy Ochsenreiter, (828) 215-7232.

ASHEVILLE’S WHITEWATER RECORDING Full service studio services since 1987. • Mastering • Mixing and Recording. • CD/DVD duplication at the best prices. (828) 684-8284 • whitewaterrecording.com

R.E.A.C.H. Your Regional Emergency Animal Care Hospital. Open MondayFriday, 5pm-8am and 24 hours on Weekends and Holidays. • 677 Brevard Road. (828) 665-4399. www.reachvet.com

Musicians’ Xchange

HELP!

mountainx.com

Earthlite Harmony Deluxe Massage Table: New in box, lots of bells and whistles, $370. Call 215-6744.

Autos 2001 SUBARU LEGACY WAGON One owner AWD wagon, excellent condition, 104,000 miles, service

General Merchandise

records; 5-speed manual. Firestone Affinity tires (70Kmile rated, 30% tread remaining); roof rack, AC, cruise control, power windows/locks, dual airbags. $7,500. 828.231.1603.

Automotive Services WE’LL FIX IT AUTOMOTIVE • Honda and Acura repair. Half price repair and service. ASE and factory certified. Located in the Weaverville area. Please call 828-275-6063 for appointment.

For Sale

Antiques & Collectibles

6 Brand new Dr. Suess books, $68 value, asking $30. 318-2483. AWESOME GOURMET COFFEE The perfect holiday gift. Farm Direct, Certified Organic, 100% KONA. Compare Moonstruck’s Organic pound - $25 - to Whole Foods’ Conventional pound - $50. moonstruckorganics.com 808-328-0707 (AAN CAN)

Sales $25 • BUY A TREE • SAVE A LIFE! Help FIRST at Blue Ridge, Inc., provide long term residential drug and alcohol treatment. • Frasier Firs, 4-12 feet. • State Street and Montreat Road, Downtown Black Mountain.

Bob Timberlake Painting: Mr. Zimmerman’s Corn. Make an offer. Call 257-2754.

Adult Services

Electronics

A WOMAN’S TOUCH “We’re all about you!” Call 275-6291.

Color Projector TV Works well. $175. Call 216-3488.

Lawn & Garden CHRISTMAS TREES PESTICIDE FREE Pesticide free Christmas Trees. All sizes. Pre-cut or choose and cut. We also have wreaths. Clyde NC. Call 828-734-9111

ABSOLUTE BEAUTY 24/7. Ask about our “Getting to know you” special. Competitive rates. Give us a call today! (828) 335-1283. DREAMSEEKERS Destination for relaxation. Call for appointment: (828) 216-8900.

F[ji e\ j^[ M[[a Adopt a Friend • Save a Life WOODFORD I.D. #11624011 Male/Neutered Rottweiler/Hound 2 years 1 month

LATTE

If you visit the bears at Santa’s Land, Cherokee Bear Zoo, or Chief Saunooke Bear Park, and would like to help in a legal action to improve the bears’ welfare, please call Amanda at 202-540-2186. Illustration: @ L & B

Medical Supplies

Vehicles For Sale

I.D. #11567656 Female/Spayed Domestic Shorthair/Mix 1 year

JOCK

I. D. #11932762 Male Terrier/Mix 2 months

7i^[l_bb[ >kcWd[ IeY_[jo 14 Forever Friend Lane, Asheville, NC 828-761-2001 • AshevilleHumane.org Buncombe County Friends For Animals, Inc.

• DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010

homeimprovement Place Your Ad on this Page! - Call Rick at 828-458-9195 WILL BEAT COMPETITORS BY 20%

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IT PAYS! (828) 251-1333

0AUL #ARON Furniture Magician • Cabinet Refacing

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A+ Carpet & Upholstery Cleaning Residential & Commercial Dual Process • Auto Carpets & Seats No Job too Big or Small Owner-Operated • Free Estimates got kids? got pets? got spills?

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DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010 •

H & H ENERGY SAVERS FREE ESTIMATES • LOCALLY OWNED 828-290-7243

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669-4625 • Black Mountain

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(828)

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The New York Times Crossword 828-225-5555

Edited by Will Shortz No.1110 Across 1 The old man 5 Bare minimum 10 Arias, e.g. 14 “Thirteen” actress ___ Rachel Wood 15 Ob/gyn test 16 Eliot Ness and cohorts 17 “anyone lived in a pretty how town” poet 19 Manassas fighters 20 Modular, as a home 21 Author better known as Saki 23 Fakes, as figures 26 Whopper topper 27 “Star Trek” director, 2009 30 “The Thrill Is Gone” bluesman 31 “Bad, bad” Brown of song 32 Banking nos. 34 Cameo gem

35 Juice box gowith 36 Big Indian 40 Animals in a Western herd 41 Neighbor of Chad 42 Big name in mail order 46 “The Monkey’s Paw” author 48 Heroine in Bizet’s “The Pearl Fishers” 49 Not real 50 Creator of Eeyore 52 One of a winter pair 56 Some med. scans 57 2007 A.L. Cy Young winner 60 Years, in Rome 61 “___ dead!” (worried teen’s words) 62 Srs.’ lobby

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE B O T H I N N O N E T P O T E N P A L A B E T N O V I E R E C

B E E P

L A U R A

E R R O R

A B O D E

F I O R E L L S O T A I R N J P E E S N T T R E N T

I T M E F S T S S C A M R S N G E R O E C U R

N U C E L E E L I A C T S

L O W P I U T N C A H

E V A D N I S E O S I N T A T T A N S E A S T R L O W E T O G P A I E R M S R A I T O U L E L E R A Y

A X E S

O D O R

T O S

63 Cookbook instruction 64 Grid play starters 65 ___’ Pea Down 1 Slightest sound 2 No longer disturbed by 3 Eight minutes/ mile in a marathon is a good one 4 Ornamental tobacco holder 5 Letter resembling an inverted “V” 6 ___ Group (“big four” record co.) 7 One of Heart’s Wilson sisters 8 Heaved sounds 9 Brit’s “Baloney!” 10 “The Elements of Style” coauthor 11 Subtitle of 1978’s “Damien” 12 Former Cavalier James 13 How Broadway characters may break out 18 TV host Povich 22 Crowds around 24 Hurdles for M.B.A. hopefuls 25 Third-party accounts 27 “Selena” star, familiarly 28 Aniston, in tabloids 29 Suffix with vision 30 “Incidentally,” to texters 33 Eager kids’ query to parents 35 Ugly as ___ 36 Ravioli fillings

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Green Building Directory 2011

Puzzle by Samuel A. Donaldson

37 Back in time 38 Brother of W. 39 “___ Poetica” 40 Jezebel’s god 41 Gymnast Comaneci 42 Andean wool sources 43 Found out, British-style

44 Fountain of Youth site, it’s said 45 “L’___ d’Amore” (Donizetti opera) 47 747 and Airbus A380, as jets go 49 Praline nut 51 CBS military drama

53 Warming trend 54 Limerick’s land 55 Target of a rabbit punch 58 Wee, to Burns 59 Cleopatra biter

For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.49 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5554. Annual subscriptions are available for the best of Sunday crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. AT&T users: Text NYTX to 386 to download puzzles, or visit nytimes.com/mobilexword for more information. Online subscriptions: Today’s puzzle and more than 2,000 past puzzles, nytimes.com/crosswords ($39.95 a year). Share tips: nytimes.com/wordplay. Crosswords for young solvers: nytimes.com/learning/xwords.

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• DECEMBER 15 - DECEMBER 21, 2010