Lady Magazine Fall 2012

OCTOBER 2012

THRIFTY THRILLS Fashion in Unexpected Places

VIRTUOUS WOMAN -vsCONTENTIOUS WOMAN Which One Are You?

Exclusive Interview:

BekahMomBaker Turned Pro

redeeming the legacy

LADY

QUARTERLY

inspiration issue

CONSUMED WITH PERFECTION One Woman’s Victory over Orthorexia

Ways to End the

CELLULITE NIGHTMARE

an online health and lifestyle magazine for Christian women

PROFESSIONAL NPC COMPETITOR

ekah Baker

PHOTO: GENE FOX © 2012

25

Fa l l 2 0 1 2

totheREADERS

Dear Reader, I am so excited to introduce the fall issue of LADY! A lot of hard work and late nights have assisted in her development. The team and I have been extremely encouraged and motivated while working because of the awesome feedback from you guys in response to the debut issue.

We’ve received tons of inquiries about submissions, positive affirmation for the content, and lots of followers.

Since this is the “inspiration” issue, we thought, what better way to get inspired than to see someone doing something awesome? I had an opportunity to interview Bekah Baker, a professional NPC Figure/ Bikini Competitor. It’s not that she’s a competitor that’s amazing. What’s amazing about her is that she is a God-fearing woman, wife, and a mother of four children. I have personally been inspired by her. I have recently lost over 30 pounds, but about halfway through my journey, I hit a wall. I could not seem to get back to my pre-mommy weight and I was losing motivation. I happened across Bekah through the social media and my perspective hasn’t been the same since.

In the coming pages, you will not only have a chance to see how I surpassed my pre-mommy weight, but you will also have an in depth look at how Bekah has been able to balance a healthy lifestyle all while maintaining unwavering faith! I am confident that this issue will inspire you to see yourself in a different light and give you that extra kick to pursue your passions to reach your full potential in life! With God’s help, we are able to do all things!

Follow us on twitter, join us on Facebook and connect with me personally. We appreciate each and everyone of you! I also want to give a special thanks to our sponsors and advertisers!

My deepest love,

Sherry E. Livingston

Editor/Publisher info@ladymagazinetoday.org

From one

LADY

...to another!

October 2012 | LADY

3

inthisissue October 2012 3 Dear Readers...

8

6 Book Excerpt: “I AM Unveiling Your Inner Beauty Gods Way” 25 Cover Story: Bekah Baker Mom Turned Pro 40 Lady’s Bookshelf 41 Natural Highlights: MahoganyCurls

18

42 Lose Weight without Trying 44 Character Building: Humility

How I Did it...

49 Spotlight On...

Are you a Contentious Woman?

34 Paradise Found: Travels 4

LADY | October 2012

20 Stop the Nightmare of Cellulite

41

45

Natural Highlights

contents

Consumed with Perfection

24 Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture is taken from the New International Version Copyright © 2012. Lady Magazine All rights reserved.

Additional Photo Credit: Cover Photo: Tara Gimmer © 2010 “Lose Weight Without Tr ying”: Morguefile Tape M easure: by jeltovski Peanuts: by Jane M. Sawyer Oats: by Seemann Water: by o0o0xods0o0o Lime: by jecnet Orange & Dessert (Flikr): by chamomile Bread: by M ichael Connors Pillow: by mzacha Olive Oil: by Andreas Levers Back Cover Photo: Morguefiles by Hotblack

Fashion in Unexpected Places

11 22

Mouthful of Bliss October 2012 | LADY

5

I

am Ia m

TY NER BEAU G YOUR IN Y GOD’S WA

UNVEILIN

am I Sh

3 1 B ea u ty ns A ff ir m at io e r ry e .

L i v in g s to

n

“For your fame went out among the nations because of your beauty, for it was perfect through My splendor which I had bestowed on you, says the Lord God.” -Ezekiel 16:14

I am

Beautiful

Book Excerpt

There’s a saying that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Women are naturally driven to want to be beautiful. It’s apart of our make up.

From childhood, we are taught that girls are made of “sugar and spice and everything nice”. I wonder who came up with that idea? When we were toddlers, we were dressed in hair bows, ponytails, flowered dresses and those cute little baby doll shoes. Our parents wanted their little girl to be the prettiest one in the room. As we got older those ideas changed. Eventually, there wasn’t much attention focused on our public presentation.

Although those ideas became less important to our earthly parents, we must remember that we are God’s children. God is the same yesterday, today and forever. In our childhood He saw us as His precious babies and took pleasure in our beauty. He created us. When we are older, He takes the same pleasure. He sees a perfected beauty.

As we age, we find all sorts of things wrong with ourselves. If you see nothing wrong with yourselves, you better believe there are at least 3 people out there who can easily and quickly find something wrong with you. These flaws tend to be affirmed in relationships. With men to be exact. I give a big round of applause to the women who have never had a man tell them that their hair wasn’t long enough or their make up was too...fake. Not long ago, I judged my physical appearance to another woman simply because the bone-head I dated wasn’t satisfied with all of this milk chocolate he had! (Lighten up! This is girl talk!) As I discovered how God sees me, as a beautiful creation, I realized that my significant other did not have a problem with how I looked. He knew how beautiful I was. I was just too much beauty for him to handle. So, I was told things that gave me a complex and affected my confidence.

Since God is your Father - taking so much pride in what he created - you must take hold of this evident fact that to Him, honey you are beautiful!

Coming Soon ...

“I Am - Unveiling your inner beauty God way” 31 beauty Affirmations by Sherry E. Livingston

“Confidence is key” they say! Confidence may be key but becoming confident is no easy task.

Everyday we are surrounded by some of the most defining images of what it means to be “beautiful” or “attractive”. Psalm 139:14 says “I will praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are your works, and that my soul knows very well.” For some, beauty may seem out of reach, but we have all been graced with a unique beauty that is distinctive from the next persons. Beauty comes from within! In this book, you will...

• Discover your hidden beauty, • Walk in victory over low self-esteem, • Become more confident in your own uniqueness.

• Attract valuable relationships

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LADY | October 2012

“Dinner’s on Me!” Don’t have the ability to give large sums of money to local charities? Not sure how to be an active part of your community? Take comfort in knowing that the solution is quite simple. We are blessed to be a blessing (2 Corinthians 9:8-12). How many people can you bless on purpose?

www.youtube.com/user/baronesscountess

For the next three months, make a personal commitment to give away at least two $10 gift cards (two dinners) to two perfect strangers. Allow God to use you to be a blessing in someone’s life.

WWW.CDBABY.COM/CD/DEBORAHDENISE3

RANDOM acts of kindness

October 2012 | LADY

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weight-loss

How I Lost 37 POUNDS Before: June 2011

157 pounds After: Today 120 pounds The first part of my weight-loss journey I lost 22lbs one year.

Before the journey...

I’ve always been petite. When I graduated high school, I weighed a whooping 97 POUNDS! I was never crazy about being that small. Department stores were my worst I began the bikini enemy.

I gained my freshman 15 in my second year of competition training at 135 pounds in March. college and then an additional 9 by the time I turned 24. I then became a runner and maintained a healthy weight for I lost my last 15 pounds in 5 months!! my height.

It wasn’t until after I had my son 4 years ago that my body took another turn in the wrong direction. My hips started spreading to the east and west. Every piece of candy and gram of carbs took residency around my belly.

Poor eating decisions and stressful situations in my life had me on a one way trip to chuncky-ville.

It was a day out with my mother when I knew it was what inspired me... time to take action. As I walked back to the car from a service station, my mother kindly said, “Baby, you better Two words...Bekah Baker! I happened to come be careful! Your legs are about ready to walk around one across her Facebook page and saw her before another!” and after photos. I was immediately inspired!

journey

inspiration

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LADY | October 2012

Finding the right food to eat is always difficult, especially when you don’t properly plan. I found a meal plan used by bodybuilders when they train for competitions. With a few tweaks here and there, I developed a meal plan that worked well for me.

I prepared meals by the week and made sure I ate every three hours. This was my daily eating plan:

“But I discipline my body and bring it under subjection...” two green veggies 1 Corinthians 9:27 (cabbage, broccoli, asparagus, or green beans) Meal 6: 2 or 3 egg whites

my meal plan...

Meal 1: Oatmeal and banana or protein shake and banana Meal 2: Can of tuna and 1 fruit Meal 3: Can of tuna and a large spinach salad with balsamic dressing Meal 4: Protein source (usually a shake; Beverly International UMP) Meal 5: 4 oz of Tilapia, Catfish or Salmon,

*Snacks: For snacks, I enjoyed honey roasted peanuts, almonds, and every now and then I treated myself to a yummy PB & J sandwich!

Before: M ay 2011

my meal plan...

my workout...

When I first started my journey, I went to the gym 4-5 days a week. Once I started my bikini training, I started working out sometimes twice a day. My schedule looked like this: Monday: A.M. cardio/P.M. arm strength training (weights) Tuesday: A.M. Cardio/P.M. ab workout and cardio Wednesday: A.M. cardio/P.M. leg workout Thursday: A.M. cardio/P.M. strength training aerobics Friday: A.M. cardio/P.M. chest and back strength training Saturday: A.M. cardio Sunday: REST

workout Have you recently achieved a weight-loss goal? Send an email to info@ladymagazinetoday.org to find out how you can be our next weight loss story!

advice to Others...

This workout schedule and eating plan is not easy. It was hard for me to be consistent but I focused on the day to day accomplishment rather than the long run.

It’s so important to get an accountability partner. My friend kept me on my toes and encouraged me to keep going. When it comes to eating, the best way to stay on track is to prepare your food weekly. Eating every three hours can become a headache when there’s nothing to eat. Keep going no matter what!

advice

October 2012 | LADY

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fashion

IN UNEXPECTED PLACES

Thrifty THRILLS

Blue Plaid Long Shirt, Unknown Goodwill, $5 Martin Fit Shorts, Banana Republic Goodwill, $5 Peep-toe Slingbacks, Fioni Payless, $9 Gold Hoop Earrings, Unknown Claire’s, $2

“She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.”

- Proverbs 31:16

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Country B

BLUE

LADYMAGAZINETODAY.ORG

Genuine Leather Satchel, Unknown Salvation Army, $2 Wooden Bracelets, Unknown Claire’s, $2

October 2012 | LADY 13 JULY 2012 13

Office CHIC 14

LADY | October 2012

Cropped Black Wool Jacket with Brass Buttons, Ann Taylor Goodwill, $5 Leather Platform Booties, BCBG Max Azria Goodwill, $10 Two-Toned Tank Dress, BeBop Macy’s, $7 Assorted Bracelets Claire’s, $4 Triplet Gold-Bead Necklace, Unknown Street Vendor, $11

October 2012 | LADY

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Ricotta-White Jacket with Mandarin Collar, Kasper Goodwill, $6 Powder Pink Crinkle Sweater, ¾-length sleeves, Forever 21 Goodwill, $4 Skinny Jeans, Mossimo Target, $12 Assorted Bracelets Claire’s, $4 Geometric Matte Earrings Claire’s, $5

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LADY | October 2012

Iridescent Pearl Necklace Premier Designs, $35

Cream and Gray Strappy Platform Pumps, Nine West Goodwill, $12

Saturday BRUNCH

October 2012 | LADY

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Contentious Woman

E

Virt u

-vs-

ver feel bombarded with stereotypical views of what “real” women are?

According to reality TV, she’s outspoken, quick-tempered and carelessly maxes out her credit cards to compete with rivals. Oh, and how about the “bad chick” who will set out anyone who so much as crosses her the wrong way? Pump the breaks. Is this the type of woman we’re called to be or is this merely a cartoonish contraption created by Satan to prevent us from claiming our destiny?

Contrary to popular opinion, women in Christ have a noble standard to uphold, and biblical role models like Ruth, Esther and even Rahab set the bar high.

Indeed, as mothers and wives, leaders and teachers, innovators and creators, we impact the world by exhibiting the fruit of the Spirit. Proverb 18:16 says that your gifts will bring you before people of influence - but will your character determine whether or not you can commune with them? often understood as contentious, Contentious woman or virtuous it’s safe to say that some nagging woman ... which one are you? is healthy. Let’s face it, sometimes irst let’s define husbands, kids and coworkers contention, shall we? need constant reminders to get “Contentious” describes work done. However, an old someone who tends to argue, and Bible friend we know as King a contentious person creates strife Solomon was all too familiar with and is usually in disagreement the daily torture of contentious with others all the time. These nagging:

“A man’s gift will make room for him and bring him before great men.”

- Proverb 18:16

F

folks are rather easy to spot.

Another term for this personality is “the nag.” While the nag is

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LADY | October 2012

A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike (Proverb 27:15).

It is better to dwell inn the wilderness,

than with a contentious and angry woman (Proverb 21:19).

It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman and in a wide house (Proverb 25:24).

The woman Folly is loud; she is undisciplined and without knowledge (Proverb 9:13).

If you missed the bullet points, Solomon is hinting, “I can’t take this anymore! Give me some space!” And we’ve all been there before: asking absurd

t uous Woman Which one are you?

has a reputation that many fail to live up to.

As Proverb 31 notes, the virtuous woman finds herself busy, tapping into her gifts and talents, making wise decisions with her spending and building up her community.

How does she look according to scripture? ~She is a woman of faith and serves God with her whole being.

She speaks with wisdom; and faithful instruction is on her tongue (Proverb 31:26). ~She is a woman who takes pride in her health.

She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks (Proverb 31:17). ~She serves others.

She opens her heart to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. (Proverb 31:20).

~She is industrious and works with her hands.

She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands (Proverb 31:13). ~She has an inner beauty that comes from God alone.

She is clothed in strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come (Proverb 31:25).

PHOTO: DMSCS/MORGUEFILES

rhetorical questions like, “Can you guess where the laundry goes?” or constantly driving at an issue without working toward a solution. This unconstructive and contentious behavior can give women a bad rep. Worst of all, looking for ways to devour your prey and refusing to back down not only affect your personal life negatively but they also impact your work environment.

Remember: coworkers are more likely to invite allies - not

combatants - out to lunch.

But kind-hearted women seem to hide among the shadows, though they can’t help but emanate light. As a woman spends quality time with God in prayer and in His word, He fashions her into an image that is like His son, Jesus. In the process she begins to develop spiritual fruit and character that reflects the Proverb 31 woman that every Christian woman professes to be.

Woefully, this woman of strength

As you can see, the virtuous woman has many traits that take a lot of discipline and commune with the Father to achieve. Joyce Meyers once said, “God will never ask you to do something that he doesn’t give you the ability to do.” Going forward, it is vitally important for women to understand their true identity.

Once she is in Christ, she can surely become that victorious virtuous woman!

October 2012 | LADY

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“...your body is a temple for the Holy Spirit... therefore honor God with your body.�

-1 Corinthians 6:19 Put an End to the Nightmare

fitness

CELLULITE

Dimples, lumps and bumps! Oh my! Most of us have stepped out of the shower to find an unflattering texture on our backside. Cheese ... and not the good kind. Cellulite sets up shop in the thighs and behind, and occasionally around the abs and arms. Caused by fat cells pressing against the skin, cellulite plagues 8 in 10 women. While the condition doesn't usually cause health complications or require treatment, few divas will boast of dimples anywhere besides their faces. Personal trainer Stacia Anderson-Ward wants you to wake up from the cellulite nightmare with these great workouts.

RESISTED SUPERMAN u Place halved tube under left foot, hold handles with right hand. v Extend right foot to back and extend left arm at a 45 degree angle forward. w Lean forward slightly, lift the handles.

12 reps x 3 sets alternating sides.

FITNESS BALL SQUATS u Stand with feet wider than shoulder width.

3

v Squat over ball pushing hips to the back.

Do not rest on the ball.

12 reps x 3 sets.

2 20

LADY | October 2012

1

2

2

1 RESISTED REAR LEG EXTENTIONS

3

u Knees hip width apart and feet

1

3

inside the tube handles.

v Extend the leg straight back and return to starting position.

12 reps x 3 sets, alternate sides.

RESISTED SIDE LEG LIFTS u Stand with feet shoulder width apart (on tube), hold handles at the waist. v Lift leg out to the side.

12 reps x 3 sets, alternate sides.

RESISTED KICKBACKS

2 1

u Knees hip width apart and feet inside the tube handles.

12 reps x 3 sets, alternate sides.

v Bend leg at the knee bringing the left foot up. Keep back straight. Stop at a 90 degree angle. (Do not over extend)

October 2012 | LADY

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mouthful of bliss: PICADILLO PIE PHOTOS BY PJA

Tools:

9”-inch skillet Cookie sheet 9”- or 10”-inch round, oven-safe casserole dish or pan

Ingredients Crust:

Ready-made pie crust or dough (or make your own)

Picadillo:

A Savory Cuban Meat Pie Topped with Caribbean Bananas Take a trip to Miami and you’ll discover that Cuban food can be marvelously simple, like espresso or fried yuca with a little garlic sauce. Stay a while and the city will unveil its soul food side, shamelessly fusing mouth-watering and unforgettable flavors with gobs and gobs of love. Pastel de Picadillo y Platános does exactly this, since the dish demands everything and the kitchen sink: the lowly, delicious Earth candy we call plantains, lots of veggies, a good handful of spices and healthy lean meat. If you have about an hour to spare, LADY invites you to give this flavorful recipe a try.

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LADY | October 2012

1 lb. ground turkey or chicken 1 red onion, diced 1 red bell pepper, diced 5 cloves of garlic, minced 1 chipotle pepper (canned) with adobo 1 cup pimiento-stuffed Spanish olives, diced 2 tablespoons cumin 1 teaspoon paprika ½ teaspoon cayenne ½ teaspoon black pepper ½ teaspoon white pepper 1 teaspoon oregano ½ to 1 teaspoon salt, or salt to taste Juice of 1 lime ½ cup of tomato sauce or ½ cup of ketchup

Topping: 2 large, mature plantains (black or yellow-black) (Note: plantains resemble bananas but are almost twice the size and are ripe when black)

INSTRUCTIONS

(1) Either use pre-made crust or dough, or make crust from your favorite recipe. At LADY, we use this quiche crust recipe, with an extra cup of flour for a slightly thicker, crispy crust that holds together quite well. Get your crust going and roll thinly with a heavy rolling pin. Pop it in the oven at 400ºF until firm but not hard.

(2) While your crust bakes, begin your picadillo in a deep 9” or 10” skillet. First, sauté the diced onion, bell pepper and garlic at a medium heat until almost caramelized. Add olives and the diced chipotle pepper and a spoonful of adobo sauce (watch your eyes and nose). Stir and let cook for 1 to 2 minutes.

(3) Add the ground turkey or chicken to the skillet and blend well with the vegetables. As the meat cooks, stir in the spices (including salt), lime juice and tomato sauce (or ketchup).

(4) Slice the plantains into thin, medium-long strips. Place on a cookie sheet with a sprinkle of salt and drizzle of olive oil. Bake for about 10 minutes.

(5) Spoon the picadillo into the crust. In circles, layer the baked plantains on top until meat is entirely covered.

Optional: Brush an egg wash over the plantains to give them a glaze and tighten the topping.

(6) Bake the dish for 10 to 15 minutes, then place into the broiler for 3 to 4 minutes to caramelize the plantains.

1

4

7

3

2

5

8

*Makes 8 to 10 servings

6

Voilà! Bliss.

9 October 2012 | LADY

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BEFORE:

cover story

PHOTO: DAVID ABOODY © 2010

B

LADYMAGAZINETODAY.ORG

ekah Baker MOM TURNED PRO

October 2012 | LADY JULY 2012

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LADY | October 2012

2011 WASHINGTON IRONMAN CHAMPIONSHIP - FIRST BIKINI COMPETITION

26

LM:

First, LADY Magazine’s so excited that you’ve graced us with this interview, Bekah! Thanks for taking time out of your busy schedule! Tell me, how long have you been competing? What inspired you?

BB:

My first competition was in October 2010. My youngest child was four at the time, and I was frustrated with the “Mommy Body” I’d been left with. When I went into a plank position the extra skin would sag and touch the floor! I talked to a few plastic surgeons about my options, but they all said a tummy tuck and removal of excess skin was the only way I could ever have a six-pack. I didn’t want a tummy tuck scar so I set out to prove them wrong!

After finding a trainer who specialized in training pre-professional athletes, I laid out my plan. He was astonished at my determination and agreed to take on the challenge: me and my post-baby body.

I lost 20 pounds in the first ten weeks. When my body fat fell below 10% and I won my first figure show, I was officially hooked on competing!

LM:

When I ran across your Facebook page, my mouth dropped! I was shocked to see your bright smile and amazingly sculpted body. I thought, “Wow, who is this?” What type of responses do you usually get when you are out and about?

BB:

Thank you so much for the compliment! I get a variety of reactions to my look. One of my favorite responses was on a family vacation when I walked into the kid’s pool area, wearing a tiny scrunchbutt bikini, surrounded by my four kids. Everyone stopped to stare. Finally, a mom finally came up to me and said, “Please tell me your house is a mess so I don’t have to hate you completely!” Competing has taken my confidence to a whole new level, and I believe people respond to that confidence.

LM:

I can’t imagine the type of life you might have. From the looks of things, you seem to stay busy. How do you balance work and family?

BB:

Like all moms, I’m very busy! It’s all about balance and flexibility for me. As far as training goes, we have a treadmill at home so I can always get in my morning cardio either before the kids are up or right after they’ve all left for school. Lately I’ve been lifting and doing my second round of cardio after 8 p.m. (after sports, dinner, homework, showers, and

LM:

Has your decision to compete affected your friendships? If so, how?

BB:

Competing has greatly impacted my friendships.

The best part is now I’ve gained healthy, balanced and supportive friendships after losing draining, lopsided and toxic ones. Unfortunately, anytime you pursue a dream or goal and begin to make changes, you’ll face resistance, often from the people closest to you. I used to be the girl who dropped everything and did anything to make sure everyone else was happy, so my newfound confidence didn’t sit well with friends and relatives who’d benefited from the old people pleaser. I also cared what people thought about me, and I hated being judged. But God clearly spoke to me and said “If I’m the only One who knows the truth, am I enough?” Over and over, those words have run through my heart and mind, and I can truthfully say I’m a better woman for having gone through those trials. Fortunately God brought the supportive friendships I needed into my life. Now my focus is on pleasing God and my husband.

No one else’s opinion matters.

LM:

I see you’re a PK (preacher’s kid). I can relate. We get a lot of spectators. What kind of responses have you gotten from other church members since you began competing?

BB:

Being the daughter of a pastor certainly added some extra fuss! My Papa has been in the ministry for 50 years, first as an evangelist and later as

PHOTO: TARA GIM MER © 2010

bedtime) simply because it’s the best time. As a competitor, I have to be more deliberate with my schedule to account for additional priorities of consistent training and proper eating. My family is my biggest priority, but preparing for a competition is also very important. It’s so helpful that my husband also competes as he understands the level of commitment it takes to prepare.

Planning ahead is key. On Sunday I cook up a few pounds of chicken breasts and steaks, and also steam my asparagus and broccoli so I’m ready for the week. I have a little cooler I can keep in the car so I have no excuse if I’m delayed while out and about. You have to be deliberate about changing your habits to set yourself up for success.

October 2012 | LADY

27

PHOTO: (ABOVE) DAVID ABOODY

pastor at a non-denominational Pentecostal church, where he’s served for the past 25 years. At my own church, I’ve been judged and ostracized like you would not believe!

While most of my church family has been supportive and cheered me on – and many of my church friends gained inspiration to become healthier and start exercising – there are a handful of unsupportive members who are really vocal about it! I’ve received hate mail, been told I was an embarrassment to our church, and that I simply needed to be where I wouldn’t be seen because I was distracting and made certain people (insecure wives) uncomfortable.

And that’s not the half of it. This has probably been the hardest part of my journey. But once again, the word God gave me rings louder than all the detractors: “If I’m the only One who knows the truth, is that enough?” I’ve learned that being angry and hurt gives power to those people that they don’t deserve. I’ve also learned to forgive and act kindly toward those I know have wronged me. It’s kind of fun – It really confuses and frustrates them, and I get to keep my joy!

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LADY | October 2012

LM:

And responses from family?

BB:

When I began preparing to compete, my Mom was totally against it and let me know with no uncertain terms. I never became defensive with her and always respected her opinion even though I didn’t agree. Eventually she realized my passion was real and that my journey was personal, which inspired her – she asked me to take her to my gym and today she’s lost a total of 70 pounds. From a size 20+ to a size 10/12! She later told me that after years of struggling with her weight she felt she just had to learn to be happy fat. So the true reason for her judgmental attitude was her frustration at my determination to be fit when I already weighed 80 pounds less than

hiding in darkness! You haven’t done anything wrong; your life simply exposed their insecurities.

Fortunately, God isn’t finished with any of us yet!

Don’t try to convince people to understand or be supportive of you.

Remember this is your journey, so let your life speak for itself. If it’s what you’re meant to do then you’ll have a life filled with peace and joy! Will there be hard drama-filled days every once in a while?

Yes, of course! But no one can steal your joy unless you allow them access through judgment, anger or bitterness.

The choice is yours.

LM:

Now, you all seem to be a family of faith. I’ve seen photos and videos you’ve shared of your father’s recent recovery from an illness.

You’ve also shared an amazing recovery of your son. What was your son’s diagnosis, and how did you to pull through?

BB:

If you look up faith in the dictionary you’d find a picture of my Papa’s smiling face! Our family always operated on faith. I clearly remember as a little girl there was no money to pay rent for the church facility. Papa had us all get on our knees and pray. Literally as we were praying the phone rang. A woman had passed away and left the exact amount in her will to our church for one month’s rent! The real kicker? She’d written her will before our church even existed! That’s the kind of God I serve. If we truly believed God really is Who He says He is and He’d really do

she did. Today she’s a transformed woman, full of energy and life, truly the woman God always intended her to be!

The lesson we’ve all learned is that just because one person wouldn’t do a particular activity doesn’t mean it’s wrong. We all have our unique paths, but I think we get so caught up in what we think is right or wrong for us personally that we forget to celebrate each other’s accomplishments.

LM:

What advice would you give other young women facing the same or similar situation?

BB:

My advice to anyone who chooses to compete is to go for it and always stay the original God created you to be! If you’re not being authentic, you’re cheating yourself and everyone you meet. Shine, baby, shine! Also, don’t ever let anyone snuff out your light because they’re more comfortable

October 2012 | LADY

29

what He says He’ll do – how would we really live?

would just sit in Justin’s room and pray for hours.

The moment Justin flatlined stands out the most to me. The alarms started blaring, lights were flashing, and several doctors and nurses rushed into the room and started working on him. I sank quietly to the floor behind his bed – partly in shock and partly because I knew if I freaked out they’d make me leave the room. I clearly remember the realization that Justin might die. I was immediately calmed with the voice of God telling me, “My

Justin, my second son, has low-level asthma and would occasionally get breathing treatments over the course of a year. But in fall 2009 when Justin was seven years old, swine flu swept through the country, and my baby went into respiratory failure. When you arrive at a hospital and 12 doctors are waiting for you, it’s never a good thing. The staff put him into a medically

induced coma and covered his body with ice packs as his temperature shot over 104 degrees.

Justin had two medicine towers with over twelve medications pumping into his little body. When his left lung collapsed, one side of his little body puffed up with the escaping air. My Papa immediately started fasting and praying. He

Word says one thousand years on earth is like one day in heaven. If he comes home to heaven tonight, the moment he arrives and turns around you’ll be here too.” I was overcome with such inexplicable peace. In that moment all the fear was gone. Justin was in the hospital for one week and he came out of that trauma completely whole and healed.

That experience dramatically changed me as a woman and mother. The following year I started competing. I realized just how precious and fleeting life is, and I wanted never to waste a second of it. I wanted my kids to see their mom living fully, stepping out on faith, taking risks and unafraid to fail. I wanted God’s best for me and my family.

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LM:

You and your husband are, like, the bodybuilding “power” couple! How’d that happen? How has competing impacted your marriage? Do you two train together or ever have friendly competitions?

BB:

Okay, so Keith’s foray into competing is pretty funny! When I went from average mom to superfit and sexy mom, he was like “Hold up, babe!

We need to look like we belong together! I don’t want to look like a cradle-robbing sugar

daddy!” I told him that he better get it together than because I wasn’t going back! A few months after my first competition, the National Physique Committee (NPC) instituted a new men’s division geared toward the athletic, model-type body. It was perfect for Keith! He cleaned up his eating and added cardio to his weight training then dropped over 20 pounds – back to his college track weight of 178. The NPC crowed my husband Washington State’s first overall Men’s Physique Champion and awarded him a ginormous sword

that highly impressed our kids!

Competing has been great for our marriage because it’s something we both enjoy and get to do together. Last year we traveled a lot to national competitions together, leaving the kids with the grandparents and just having a blast. We make a great team because I represent for the moms and he reps for dads over 40 (he’s 46) and working professionals. We don’t train together because it just doesn’t work with our schedules

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but it’s always fun when we can, and I think I’m still his favorite spotter!

LM:

Tell us about your kids.

BB:

Keith and I have been blessed with four kids.

Isaiah, our oldest, is twelve years old and just started middle school. He’s very artistic and our soccer star. Justin’s 10 and in the fifth grade. He plays quarterback for football and is on a premier basketball team as well. He inherited his Mom’s love of shoes and fashion. Kya’s our one and only princess. She’s 7 ½ and in second grade. Truly my mini-me! Not only does she love to dance and play basketball, but she’s laser-focused at school, and the sunshine in our family. My baby, AJ (Anthony James), just turned six and started full-time kindergarten. He has the sweetest spirit about him. When my Papa went through a recent illness, AJ prayed for his Grandpa every day. He’s very sensitive to the emotions of those around him, always wants to help, and rocks a fro-hawk like nobody’s business!

LM:

Many women feel limited in life when they become mothers. But not you! What has been your biggest challenge as a mom?

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The same challenge as a woman in general: Finding balance! How much I help my kids versus how much I let them learn on their own.

How much time I take for myself working out versus devoting every moment to being a mom and a wife.

How much time I spend working my business versus cleaning up the house and catching up on laundry! I once thought putting everyone else first was what a good

mom did. But if you never recharge yourself you have nothing to give. My kids deserve the best version of me, which means I had to learn to care for myself. I’ve also learned that I’m not good at everything! (Shocking, I know.) But I’ll let you in

on a little secret: that’s what professionals, friends and family are for! For example, I have the hardest time being organized so I found an organizer to help make our home function better for us! If you need help, ask! If you don’t ever need help… well, I’m not sure what to tell you, except you’re probably in denial and totally exhausted! It takes a village – not just to raise a child but to have a happy and balanced family life in general.

LM: So, what’s next on your agenda? Are you currently training for any competitions?

BB: Currently I’m training for a local show scheduled

for November, and I plan to compete both locally and nationally next year. I competed

get more info and also subscribe to my blog “A Mama Bringing Sexy Back.” You can email me at Bekah@probodysupplements. com . I’m also always on Facebook, so feel free to “friend” me! Bekah Baker (Rebekah Thompson). Every day I post my workouts and inspirational quotes. I love sharing my story with others, and I hope to inspire moms to break free and become the best original versions of themselves God always intended them to be!

twice this past spring and performed okay, not great. I ended up leaving my original gym and then my Papa became critically ill the next week.

Suddenly, I was sleeping at the hospital and eating high-sugar carb-loaded food with zero exercise. I packed on 15 pounds quickly. Luckily a friend who’s also a bodybuilder and very knowledgeable about nutrition, called and woke me up out of my carb-coma. Today I’m back on track, dropped 16 pounds in about a month, and have the best physique I’ve ever had! Also, I was recently asked to co-emcee the show I originally did back in 2010. In the future, I’d love to pursue emceeing and hosting along with fitness modeling and motivational speaking. I’m also so honored to be the Health and Fitness editor for PacificPageants Magazine, giving regular tips on health and fitness in my “Building Your Body Better with Bekah” articles.

LM:

Tell us about your company!

BB:

Pro Body Supplements emerged from the fact that so many people came to me and Keith for advice on what supplements to buy and where.

We wanted to provide everyone with quality products at very reasonable prices, so we keep our margins much lower than normal! Check us out at probodysupplements.com

LM:

How can your fans stay connected?

BB:

Visit my website BekahBaker.com where you can

October 2012 | LADY

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travels

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T

Lady's

B

L

M

natural highlights

MAHOGANYCURLS How long have you been natural?

I have been natural 3 years. I did the big chop February 15, 2009 What is your hair type?

My hair type is curly kinky. It is in the three categories. I really do not get into hair types. I just focus on the health of my hair.

What made you decide to go natural?

I became tired of my relaxer. I stumbled across a blog that featured this natural with beautiful curls and I immediately fell in love with curly hair.

What is your signature style?

The wash ‘n’ go is my signature style, but this year I’m going to experiment and focus on perfecting my twist-outs. I’ll also play around with other natural hairstyles.

Has sporting your natural hair affected your work environment? If so, how?

No, it hasn’t. Everyone compliments me on my hair.

Have you always liked your natural hair?

Yes, I’ve always loved it!

What are your favorite oils/treatments?

My favorite treatment is a simple honey and olive oil mask. It makes my hair so soft and shiny!

Have you ever had to deal with negativity about being natural? If so, how did you address it?

Yes, when I did the big chop, no one understood why I cut my hair. They were in total shock and thought it was some sort of phase I was going through. I just ignored the ignorant comments and focused on me! I knew that they would come around eventually. Guess what? They did, and the majority have decided to go natural!

WWW.MAHOGANYCURLS.COM WWW.YOUTUBE.COM/USER/MAHOGANYCURLS

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character building

What the humble do:

What the proud do:

• Compare themselves with the holiness of God and feel a desperate need for His mercy.

• Are quick to admit their failure and to seek forgiveness when necessary.

• Give thanks in all things: they are quick to forgive because they realize how much God has forgiven them; they let go of grudges and are set free from the poison of unforgiveness and bitterness.

• Reverence, encourage, and lift up those that God has placed in positions of authority, and they talk to God in intercession, rather than gossiping about the faults they see in others.

• Yield their rights and have a meek spirit.

• Are motivated to serve others and to be sure others’ needs are met before their own.

• Make it a point to show a genuine interest in other people by asking them questions about their life and their interests. Genuinely listen when others are talking.

• Compare themselves with others and feel worthy of respect and honor.

• Have a hard time saying “I was wrong; will you please forgive me?”

• Become bitter and resentful when they are wronged; they try to hold others hostage with their unforgiveness (which is actually impossible); they carry grudges and keep a record of wrongs.

• Are especially prone to criticize those in positions of authority - their pastor, their boss, their parents - and they talk to others about the faults they see.

• Claim rights and have a demanding spirit.

• Desire to be served - they want life to revolve around them and their own needs.

• Like to talk about themselves and rarely show and interest in other people; rarely ask personal questions of others that would show that they are genuinely interested in their life.

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“God opposes the proud but favors the humble.”

- James 4:6 (NIV)

testimony

by Sabrina Caulfield

One woman’s victory over

PHOTO: /MORGUEFILES

Consumed with Perfection

ORTHOREXIA

“...for everyone born of God overcomes the world.”

-1 John 5:4

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A

s a classic late bloomer, college was the backdrop for many firsts for me: the dorky proto-boyfriend with clammy hands; the anxious first kiss and French kiss (which would require much improvement); real Chinese food; the disappointment of failing calculus exams, almost failing a class and having to claw my way out of the black hole of physics before I lost my scholarships. Needless to say, failure represented uncharted territory - in high school I’d been an A-student - so both conceptually and emotionally I did not do failure. Finally, after a painful year of trial and error in the wrong major, I stepped out on faith and enrolled in sociology intro classes. Before I knew it, my transcript reflected the ambition of a burgeoning historian or social scientist, not a physicist. Part accident, part divine intervention, changing my major was singlehandedly the best decision of my college career.

End of an Nightmare

Academic

Not only did my grades instantly improve, but also I suddenly had the free time I’d craved. Who wants to be buried in books in the Big Apple? Somewhere between flag football matches and excursions to jazz and blues clubs, I discovered a passion that fused my love of music and my natural tendency toward physical activity – dance. Having paid all my student fees, I dove headfirst into all things dance related: international and American

ballroom, swing and lindy hop, compliments. At the time I would break dance, capoeira - you have sacrificed anything at the name it, I did it, and I was friggin’ altar of tango, even my body. good.

Gaining Weight …

Over the summer of 2003, I then Losing My Mind found a cheap sublet apartment near campus, so I had plenty of disposable income from a research job and another part-time gig at a library. Most of that money went toward food, my Metro pass, and cover charges for various dance events around town. When I wasn’t dancing, I spent free time between bookstores and the gym. For the first time in my life I was really fit and healthy with no hang-ups about my jean size or weird insecurities about the small breasts I’d inherited genetically.

Dance had given me self-esteem and confidence, and allowed me to manage my weight with something both physically and emotionally satisfying.

As the summer winded down, I decided to dip my toes into a new dance style - Argentine tango known as “a vertical expression of horizontal desire.” Not only did I fall madly head over heels for Rafael - my first instructor who was a former ballet dancer - I also fell hard for tango and the lithe, graceful bodies of the dancers at his gathering. Rafael and I got serious fast, and before I knew it, we were dance partners, giving lessons to his students and appearing at events and on local morning shows to promote his dance school. Before long only tango mattered, because I thrived on the audience’s praise and Rafael’s attention and

Like other dancers, I made the mandatory pilgrimage to Buenos Aires, Argentina, the birthplace of tango where world renowned dancers and instructors still live and work. For two months in 2004, I did nothing but speak broken Spanish, dance all night … and eat. The vast array of highend and artisanal food is one of many reasons why Buenos Aires is called the Paris of the South, and I partook of every decadent morsel placed before me. As I packed on the pounds, I continued dancing in a world that prized svelte, thin and petite women.

Upon my return to the U.S., my dance friends were quick to raise their eyebrows and comment on my new curves, and Rafael seemed far less interested in me. As a matter of fact, he even referred to my rear-end as “wide” the moment we saw each other again. Indeed, in two short months away, I’d gained almost twenty pounds. But instead of dancing my way back to a healthy weight - instead of doing what I loved so much - I shamefully donned by sweats and hit the gym.

ORTHORE 46

LADY | October 2012

Like a healthy 21-year-old, I began shedding the weight in the dreaded but completely normal trickle of one pound each week.

However, I was determined to accelerate the pace of weight-

loss in the healthiest way possible, so I started to scour women’s magazines and the internet for fitness advice. Somewhere along the way I discovered weight training and the highly recommended practice of “clean eating” which emphasizes fresh fruit and vegetables, lean meat and whole grains. It also ditches pre-packaged and processed foods . Since professionals were firmly behind the idea, I had the seal of approval I needed to dive right in. And when I began to shed inches overnight - just by eating clean - my quest to get back to my old weight suddenly became an obsession and desire for perfection.

At the gym, my sessions grew longer and longer - 45 minutes of cardio and 45 minutes of weight training at least 4 days each week. And at my dorm’s dining hall, I chose baked chicken breast over Salisbury steak, I preferred spinach salad with beets and nuts instead of white rice and vegetables. Certainly these were good choices wholesome choices - but I could hardly recognize who and what I’d become. At every meal, I felt superior to all my classmates while simultaneously suffering from the paranoia that everyone was watching me and judging what I ate.

‘’

took two t e k r a m r e p s to the su p i ies ber t r e c y o r m g y f l o l Eventua 30 worth $ r o healthy n 0 u 2 $ g t n s i h ju t e r hours fo asing som h c r u p d e r fea cause I so utrients. n h g u o n e ut and witho because I so feared purchasing something unhealthy and without enough nutrients. Cheese, mayo, bread and pasta were constant nono’s, especially on sandwiches.

I nixed eating after 7:00PM, no matter how much hunger pangs tore through my body. Because I refused to consume anything with added sugar, salt or fat -which were villains in my world -- I could hardly eat out at restaurants and rarely had lunch with classmates. Gone were the days of hanging out with friends after a sweaty night at the city’s dance festival, gone were the crispy duck noodles and innocent slice of pizza I’d earned with five exhilarating hours of dancing the jitterbug.

Such a quest for perfection with so many restrictions was doomed from the beginning. Although my weight-loss plan began as a wellintentioned attempt to correct negative and unhealthy behavior, I quickly became preoccupied with “right” eating that resembled religious devotion. Anytime I craved a slice of chocolate cake, I castigated myself as “weak” and At the expense of all else - even “disloyal” to my own body, and dance - I spent my entire day I ruthlessly judged everyone who fixated on food and my workouts. gave into temptation for sweets or Eventually my trips to the salty snacks. supermarket took two hours for severe psychological just $20 or $30 worth of groceries The

EXIA

deprivation led to embarrassing and guilt-ridden lapses: sneaking into McDonald’s for a supersized order of fries, or bingeing on a jar of peanut butter, box of 12 granola bars or bag of tortilla chips. When I say binge, I mean that I’d practically inhale the entire contents in just one sitting. Feeling more in control on other days, I’d “chew and spit,” a common technique among anorexics and bulimics that permits a brief indulgence in the taste of forbidden foods without the penalty of guilt and actual caloric intake.

Now don’t get me wrong: I strongly believe that individuals should maintain active lifestyles and eat balanced, nutritious meals, but what I faced was neither a lifestyle nor balanced. There is a major difference between a confidence-crushing obsession and a healthy approach to weight management that is strengthened by self-acceptance and support of friends and family.

Without a doubt, that chapter in my life felt like a lonely, horrific nightmare I couldn’t seem to shake. In the eye of this storm, I distinctly remember a phone call with my sister-in-law, Laila, and how I raved about my radical weight-loss techniques. Because

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‘’ no one’s , a n i r b a S “ hat’s ing, b W b . o s u , o d y e t g p rru watchin ’s e n Laila inte o o N . you eat watching u okay?” o y e r A ? going on we’re best friends, I opened up and said, “Yeah, but I know people are constantly watching me eat. They think I’m --.” Laila interrupted, sobbing, “Sabrina, no one’s watching you eat. No one’s watching you. What’s going on? Are you okay?” I promised that I was fine, even though I knew it was far from the truth. Before we ended the call, Laila said she’d pray for me, and I hoped she would.

I also started to skip meals.

Within weeks of working on my paper at the library, a Christian girl from my dorm began stopping by my computer terminal to chat and check in. She’d also bring me bottled water and snacks to keep my energy levels up. After some gentle prodding, I finally accepted an invitation to attend a worship service with her. I distinctly remember how the membership was so small, and A Divine Computer how all the members welcomed me so warmly. I was amazed not Glitch Saved My Life only by the passionate worship In the middle of writing my senior service, but also how sincerely thesis paper, my laptop crashed. everyone prayed for each The same laptop I’d used to other. Almost every Sunday until supplement my gym sessions with graduation, I went back, and video workouts sputtered, gasped today I’m certain that the prayers then blinked just one pitiful little of all those members delivered light when I tried rebooting. me.

Only God knew that computer death meant I’d have to finish I wish I could write that I stopped all my work at the university’s worrying about my weight right central library, which also meant way, or that I immediately stopped I couldn’t do videos, dash away exercising compulsively, or that to the gym at a moment’s notice I instantly didn’t feel suspicious or waste time researching food. of food. But that didn’t happen.

Graduation - and therefore, the God transformed me gradually, deadline for my thesis paper - that is, over the course of another was swiftly approaching, and yet two years. Not only did God I still struggled to stay focused. withdraw me from people who Anxious to workout, I stole away were critical of my body, but later for 30 minutes to an hour so that at another church He surrounded I could run the library’s seven me with women who embraced flights of stairs over and over their figures and natural curves, again. Fearful of gaining weight, all while maintaining a healthy

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weight. Before long, I didn’t hate myself when I looked into the mirror, and I could enjoy a juicy burger without starving myself later. Finally, I could hit the gym without meticulously tabulating how many calories I’d burned.

Some might express doubt that orthorexia nervosa is real, but for me and others who’ve fought their way free of this near-fatal obsession, the hunger, paranoia and low self-esteem were proof enough. Medically, the jury is still out, since orthorexia nervosa is not officially recognized as an eating disorder. Interestingly enough, neither is obesity, but both conditions possibly signal an unhealthy, compulsive and imbalanced relationship with food. If you’re battling any fear of food or negative eating behavior, talk to your doctor, church counselor, pastor, friends, or whoever you trust. Know that you’re not alone, and be assured that He who the Son sets free is free indeed.

Imagine eating a normal-size piece of birthday cake and feeling like you had to repent by eating only "pure" foods from that point on. Dietary purity is the cornerstone of orthorexia nervosa, an unhealthy obsession with eating the right types of food. By being righteous about food, orthorexics often feel superior to others. They praise themselves when they are vigilant and condemn themselves for even the most minor indulgences. ~ Victoria Shanta Retelny, The Essential Guide to Healthy Healing Foods

Spotlight on ... Tera Houston

~ Louisville, ky

Lady Magazine congratulates Tera L. Houston of Louisville, Kentucky, who launched her own jewelry and accessories business this past September. Tera's boutique, All These Things, draws its name from Matthew 6:33, which continually encourages her to "seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added" unto her. Tera gained several years of sales experience with a popular women's jeweler, and also as an branch manager and recruiter for a direct sales jewelry company. Despite her background and strong track record, Tera still struggled with self-doubt and low esteem for her potential as a sole proprietor. Today, she believes God used her work experience to prepare her for opening a business of her own. Not only will Tera host home parties, but she also looks forward to expos and vendor events. Tera, Lady Magazine applauds your tenacity and boldness in Christ!

Visit Tera @ www.youravon.com/terahouston.

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PHOTOS: COURTNEY HENDERSON

sponsor LADY

I

I want to let you know that if you find yourself in trials and tribulations, what you’re going through is not as bad as it seems. In the past, I too faced many giants, and at times I didn’t care about the outcomes. Now that I have a heart for God, I care deeply about the results, since my victory can inspire others in their walk with God. Over the years, I’ve learned that a critical element of victory is having a relationship with Jesus and knowing that the Kingdom of God is within each of us. So when you find yourself going through unexpected circumstances, you’ll have peace because you know that Jesus is carrying that burden and loves you infinitely.

In the midst of trials, the Lord’s sincere love will bring light and joy into your life. The Spirit will also remind you that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28).

As a child of God through Christ Jesus, you already have the victory, and the Lord will give

BISHOP AUNDRA JOHNSON you strength to be long-suffering (meaning that you don’t quit on Him). From now on, when you’re faced with giants, just know that you have the power and authority through Jesus to overcome.

When people mistreat you, simply follow God’s guidelines on how to respond (Matt. 5:44): (1) Love them, even though it’s difficult; (2) Bless them by asking God to bring good things into their lives; (3) Do good and be kind; (4) Pray for them.

Know that ultimately God is behind the scenes at all times and has everything under his purview. So be encouraged and trust Him for provision, protection and all else you need. If you know someone who’s going through a storm, tell them about Jesus and His suffering so that we could enjoy peace and life more abundantly.

WWW.FAITHEQUALSLIBERTY.COM

PHOTO: COURTNEY HENDERSON

sponsor LADY

LAW OFFICE OF ATTORNEY

CHRISHAUNA CLARK “ADVANCING JUSTICE” 3 2 0 W. H a rd i n g Av e Pi n e Bl u f f, A r k a n s a s 7 1 6 1 1 Te l e p h o n e ( 8 7 0 ) 5 3 4 - 4 4 0 0 Fa x ( 8 7 0 ) 5 3 5 - 4 9 6 1 C h r i s h a u n a C l a r k @ y a h o o. c o m

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven [...]He makes everything beautiful in its time.” -Ecclesiastes 3:1-11 Copyright © 2012. Lady Magazine