QUARTERLY SPRING 2013
(EXTRA)ORDINARY WOMEN
redeeming the legacy
LADY
Embrace Issue
Who are Working It!
LET THE CHURCH PRAISE THE LARD
Are Your Eating Habits Affecting Your Spiritual Walk?
EMBRACE LIFE MUCH?
Jade Does!
Always!
You’ll Never Believe How!
CONCERN OR CONTROL?
Recognizing Abusive Behavior an online health and lifestyle magazine for Christian women
J
ade Meredith
WWW.ALWAYSJADESLIFE.COM
VIDEO BLOGGER
40
page
From the Editor’s Desk What an exciting time to be connecting with everyone once again! A new year has come, which means we all have a new beginning. All of the disappointment and failures of last year can be waved goodbye! We can correct the mistakes we made by deciding once and for all to make steps towards the road less traveled. We can live our lives with purpose and make it a point to engage in every opportunity to do something different. We can choose not to be complacent and allow ourselves the freedom to explore new adventures. This year marks the year you become a new you! In the last year, I’ve spent a lot of time setting goals for myself in the hopes to continually realize my inner strength. As I did this I always found myself looking into the lives of other women who have manage to do the same. I am inspired by these women. Somehow, a flame is ignited on the inside of me that makes me want to push harder. These women overcome insurmountable obstacles and become leaders. They suffer in silence while their friends and family carry on in their normal lives. Then one day their goals are accomplished. Their friends and families come together to celebrate them, throwing parties and snapping pictures which is then shared with the world. She’s become a doctor, lost 95lbs, opened her own boutique, or celebrated being natural for one year. She’s become a mogul for women who seek direction and she will probably never know the impact she’s made on the world. As I sit for hours munching on popcorn in from of my computer screen (watching YouTube) I am amazed to see the types of feedback these women receive and how I too wish I could have that voice or do my make up that way or put together an amazing vintage outfit. This year, I aim to pay special tribute to the women who have learned to embrace their passions and have been generous enough to share it with the world! Find your passion and embrace them this year! Editor/Publisher
Spring 2013 | LADY
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inthisissue 3 From The Editor’s Desk 7 (Extra)Ordinary Women 16 Conquering Doubt In The Social Media 18 Unconditional Love 20 A Balanced Life Is Beautiful By Pastor Taffi Dollar 21 Thrifty Thrills 30 More Than A Conqueror 33 9 Surprising Health Benefits About Your Latte 34 Natural Highlights: Baroness Countess 38 4 Ways to Know When You’re Being Called By Marshawn Evans 40 COVER FEATURE: Jade Meredith Video Blogger of AlwaysJadesLife.com 48 With My Body I Will Glorify God: A Personal Journey 50 FOOD: Fork Tender Pot Roast 52 “Let The Church Praise The Lard” By Sherry E. Livingston 55 Concern or Control: Recognizing Abusive Behavior
Spring 2013
7 (Extra)Ordinary Women
33 Benefits in the Beans
Copyright © 2013. Lady Magazine All rights reserved. Lady Magazine Online w w w.ladymagazinetoday.org email: info@ladymagazinetoday.org submissions@ladymagazinetoday.org Additional Photo Credit: Cover Photo: Jade M eredith, Las Vegas, NV Valley Boy Photography ~ www.VallyeBoyPhotography.com Gene Fox Photography: w w w.gfox.biz SkyTouchePhotos: w w w.SkyTouchePhotos.ifp3.com Radiance Woody -Brown: RJW Photography Special thanks to all who made photo and editorial contributions for the Spring 2013 issue.
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16
34
Natural Highlights
Who Cares?
21 Thrifty Thrills
Preparation for Success
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30 Interested in writing for Lady? Visit us online to find out how!
Let the Church Praise the Lard
6 LADY | Spring 2013
INSPIRATION
“Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much...” ~Luke 16:10
(EXTRA)ORDINARY WOMEN If you’re anything like these women, you know you don’t have to be a millionaire to make an impact in the community around you. Check out how these ladies are using their gifts to serve others. Spring 2013 | LADY
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Age: 24
ENGINEERING ANALYST
I am currently a part time graduate school student with the Keller Graduate School of Management online. I am pursuing an Information Systems Management degree with an emphasis in Information Security. I anticipate graduating in October 2013. I currently work as an Engineering Analyst at the Arkansas Electric Cooperative Corporation in Little Rock, Arkansas. I try to be active in various community service activities as they are presented.
FUTURE HOPES
My future career goal involves working as an Information Security Officer in corporate America. I will settle for just about any I.T. related career as a start in the meantime for experience. After all, I.T. is my passion. I also want to teach online classes after I complete my Master’s program. There are also two avenues I plan to travel after I finish the “educational” chapter of my life: 1) Model 2) Start my own business. I aspire to ultimately do whatever the Lord sees fit for me to do in life. I’m always open to doing His will.
STATEMENT OF FAITH
“Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.”– Joshua 1:9 Business Contact: Email: cgmonk_06@yahoo.com Office Phone #: (501) 570-2126
8 LADY | Spring 2013
COURTNEY MONK RJW Photography © 2012
Spring 2013 | LADY
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ENTREPRENEUR Age: 31 I live in Pine Bluff, Arkansas, was raised in Chicago, Illinois and grew up in Ames, Iowa. I am God’s Servant, Wife to Krandon J. Henry, Entrepreneur, and Teacher – in that order. Simply, I maintain the daily needs of my home, while building a business as I assist in the development of young children.
DENISE HENRY
FUTURE HOPES
I obtained my Bachelor of Science degree in Child, Adult and Family Services from Iowa State University. Most of my career I have worked in the private sector of childcare and preschool. Four years ago, I ventured into entrepreneurship and currently I work alongside my husband as we steward Un-Khained Productions and Un-Khained Radio Outreach. Lastly, I have been blessed to serve in the communities I reside. In Iowa, I volunteered at soup kitchens, the Department of Human Services’ recovery home for girls, back to school parties, etc. Currently, in Pine Bluff I serve my local church with my husband as a youth pastor, and I am looking for other ways to serve the city of Pine Bluff. Spiritually, my goal is to better love God and people. Personally, I am looking forward to cultivating my marriage and raising children. Professionally, I desire to further grow and establish Un-Khained Productions as the premiere multi-media company and Un-Khained Radio Outreach. I plan to publish my first book and re-establish myself in the arts.
STATEMENT OF FAITH
It’s ALL good! This is a statement I use in my life, based on Psalm 118:1 and James 1:17. It causes me to be thankful and remember God’s faithfulness and mercy in the midst of great times, good times and especially through tough times. My (His) grace is sufficient enough for you (me) 2nd Corinthians 12:9, ENOUGH said I think! Business Contact: www.un-khained.com Email: dmhenry@un-khained.com, (515) 451-2982, Facebook.com/UnKhained, Twitter @Un_Khained.
Age: 37
BODY BY FELICIA
Creator of my own hand crafted Bath & Body products, Body By Felicia. I am a Bible believing, God trusting, proud single mother of two children; Maxwell 11, and Mia, 8. Between my kids, extended family, extra-curricular activities, and my products, I am extremely busy.
CAREER PATH
As fate would have it, I got married very young, and pushed education to the back burner to be a wife and mother for 11 years; prior to, I attended Philander Smith College in brief. Still having a desire to complete my educational goal, a couple of years ago (newly single), I decided to tackle education once on a Trade School level, with Therapeutic Massage. I chose that trade having an ulterior motive to 12 LADY | Spring 2013
pair it with my goals of creating my own Bath & Body products.
FUTURE HOPES
I want my products on to be featured as one of Oprah's Favorite Things; I would love to be on NBC's Shark Tank to have a chance at potential investors. I've been on the losing end of a TV game show (Youtube me on Wheel Of Fortune), it's time to win. I plan to be National and eventually international; local and regional are wonderful, but there is a bigger picture. Nothing is handed to us and nothing in life is free; everything comes with a price. With wisdom, power, and understanding, how can I lose? I want God to exceed the abundance, just as He said.
www.bodybyfelicia.com
bodybyfelicia@gmail.com (501)-563-2276
VALLEY BOY PHOTOGRAPHY ~ WWW.VALLYEBOYPHOTOGRAPHY.COM
FELICIA ROGERS-HUGHES
SHALITA HEARD
Age: 31
INTERNATIONAL HAIR EXTENTION ASSOCIATION You can call me the All American Businesswoman. I am the founder of the International Hair Extension Association, where hairstylists become successful business owners. I teach beauty professionals how to build successful businesses using the same system I used to turn $20 into a 6 figure business in 12 months. Through the association, hairstylists are able to receive training hands as well as online. Technical skills are taught to teach stylists the proper way to do a variety of hair extension techniques ranging from the basic sew-in, fusion, cranial prosthesis and even how to make clip in hair extensions as well.
and equip them with everything they need to grow their business. We do all of the work in regards to filling and shipping orders. The owner is only responsible for sending the buyers to their site. Hair Extensions are a $60 Billion a year industry. My goal for 2013 is to help 500 people build successful hair extension related businesses.
WWW.SHALITAHEARD.COM Photo Credit: SkyTouchePhotos/SkyTouchePhotos.ifp3.com
FUTURE WORK
In January of 2013, I will be launching the Protege Program, where beauty professionals will be involved in a 3 month group program that walks through the proper way to market, brand and promote their business. It’s good to have talents and skills behind the chair but if nobody knows how talented and skilled you are, you will not have any customers. I also give stylists as well as others the opportunity to start their own brand of hair extensions. We create their logo, website
ShalitaHeard@eWomenNetwork.com (501)-240-8982 Twitter: @ShalitaHeard
Age: 24
INDUSTRIAL WORKER
Currently deployed to Afghanistan. I work at the Pine Bluff Arsenal. I make and repair gas mask for the war fighters. I travel to different military bases to assess the readiness of their gas mask and chemical alarms. I also deploy to war zones as a civilian to do supply and administrative work as needed to support the war fighters. I am currently pursuing a degree in transportation and logistics management at the American Military University.
FUTURE HOPES
I would like to finish school and climb up the GS scale. Once I have secured a comfortable government position I would like to take more time to concentrate on my music.
STATEMENT OF FAITH
“There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven.� ~Ecclesiastes 3:1 Camelia.henderson@gmail.com
CAMELIA HENDERSON Spring 2013 | LADY 15
ADVICE
by Michelle Nash
Conquering Doubt in the
Social Media So you’ve shared a special moment with your friends but no one has anything to say. What do you do when it seems like no one cares?
ecently, I posted a photo to my Facebook profile and I must say, it was one of the R best photos I believe I’ve ever taken. Usually my
hair is out of place, my eyes are half closed or my clothes are hanging in the wrong direction. Oh, but this photo was on point! I was looking fabulous. Everything about my look was right. I had booked a photo shoot for professional shots to update several networking accounts and I felt so great about these new pictures I had to share them. Once I changed my Facebook profile photo, I went about my normal day to day activities. Usually when I post photos, depending on the occasion or the location (like so many others) I expect to see what type of responses I will get. How many “likes” will be listed in the notifications? It wasn’t until a day later when I realized that I had only gotten 5 “likes” on my profile photo. “Five?! Only five?” I thought to myself. I was a little disappointed. Not really knowing how to feel, I immediately logged out of my account and avoiding logging back in for a few days. It was a Wednesday night when I stood in the bathroom cleaning my face of all of the make-up I wore when I realized that I looked totally different from what I had been looking like all day. Smiling around the office and gliding about like a top model during the day was far from what I saw in the mirror that night. Nothing was visible except age spots, blemishes from months of breakouts and dark rings around my eyes which revealed my uneven skin tone. Any woman who wears make-up on a day to day basis understands how grateful one can be for Maybelline, Cover Girl and Mary Kay when she looks back at herself
Photo Credit: Luba V Nel, StockFresh.com
naked faced at bedtime. I ran and grabbed my camera, snapped a photo and loaded it to my Facebook page to share the “real me” with the world. I’ve never been shy about being transparent. I must admit, I was not on any level expecting much feedback from this photo, especially after the lack of “likes” I’d received from the professional picture I had uploaded several days prior. The next day, after arriving home, I had the opportunity to log into Facebook and was taken back by the number I saw listed above my notifications icon. “62” - I had received 57 “likes” and 5 comments on this photo I’d posted of myself at my absolute worst. You can imagine the confusion I was feeling. “So you mean to tell me that only 5 people are generous enough to tell me they liked my professional shot and 57 people are acknowledging me at my worst?” Using the
word “annoyed” would be an understatement for the emotions that coursed through my veins in that moment. Why was it so hard for these fifty-seven people to acknowledge my nicer shot? Was it that they didn’t see it? I was curious about this and decided to post another one of my professional shots and after a few hours, I had gotten no responses. Another day went by and 2 people kindly affirmed. I was so disappointed. I was disappointed because I began to realize that even though you want to believe that people are happy for you when you have accomplished something or when you share something that your are really proud of, not a lot of people are going to give props where props are due. Could it be that people are threatened by others’ success? Is it that they feel as though others progress illuminate their insecurities? I believe the answer is yes and yes. As much as we would like to believe that our “social circle” is 100% behind us because they hit “like” or chime in on a virtual conversation, it’s not always evident. So many others experience the very same issue. They get a job promotion and share the news by uploading a photo of their private offices; they get a new vehicle and share it via Instagram; they change their relationship status to “engaged” while sharing photos of the wedding ring and out of their 863 friends, less than 1% of them actually seem to care. This can become discouraging for those who spend a lot of time connecting with family and friend through this medium. As humans, we were created to be connected to one another and we were certainly created to desire affirmation. Being able to stay confident when no one seems to take notice is very difficult when you just need a pat on the back and a “job well done”. Could you imagine all that would have been forfeited if Jesus had given up because no one affirmed him at every healing? He spent much of his time accomplishing the works of the Father yet he was being pushed to cliffs, harassed with stones, and accused of blasphemy. There’s a type of confidence I believe is necessary when you share yourself with the world. This confidence should be rooted in self and self should be rooted in Jesus. Choosing
“Women can be prone to anxiety and depression by talking too much to their friends on Facebook. Called “co-rumination”, frequently discussing the same problem can lead to an unhealthy obsession.” -Chris Irvine, Excessive Users Get Worse Grades in College, LiveScience.com to open yourself to others can be inspiring but knowing who you are and having confidence in your individuality will keep you from being moved by naysayers. For the most part, you’ve got to know how to encourage yourself when no one else will do it. The Bible tells us that we should put no confidence in people, but all confidence should be in God (Psalms 118:8). We also know from scripture that there is a reward for confidence. “Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised.” (Hebrews 10:35-36, ESV) If you can focus on how God feels about you in these moment of achievements and highlights in your life, there’s nothing anyone can “not say” that could get you discouraged. Did you know that God is excited for you when you take that beautiful photo? Did you know that when you get the man of your dreams he and his angels are celebrating with you? Zephaniah understood the happiness God gets over us. “The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing” (Zephaniah 3:17). The next time you share a moment with your Facebook friends and they hold their applause for you, don’t worry. God’s got a party going on your behalf! Keep posting and stay confident!
complete1000 + unequivocal = unquestionable (perfect) + genuine - absolute / unmitigated - unqualified & consummate (assured) flawless - categorical + thorough3 - whole / consummate & assured / flawless = perfect + genuine - unmitigated 2 (unqualified) + consummate & assured / flawless = perfect + 2 genuine - unmitigated (unqualified) + whole & absolute unquestionable = thorough - unequivocal / categorical * complete + unqualified = consummate & whole - assured / flawless + perfect & genuine6 - unmitigated + complete (absolute) unquestionable = thorough / unequivocal * categorical & whole & absolute - unquestionable = thorough unequivocal / categorical * complete + unqualified = consummate & whole - assured / flawless + perfect & genuine6 unmitigated + complete - (absolute) unquestionable = thorough / unequivocal * categorical & complete1000 + unequivocal = unquestionable (perfect) + genuine - absolute / unmitigated unqualified & consummate (assured) flawless - categorical + 3 thorough - whole / consummate & assured / flawless = perfect + genuine - unmitigated (unqualified)2 + whole & absolute unquestionable = thorough - unequivocal / categorical * complete + unqualified = consummate & whole - assured / flawless + perfect & genuine6 - unmitigated + complete complete1000 + unequivocal = unquestionable (perfect) + genuine - absolute / unmitigated - unqualified & consummate (assured) flawless - categorical + thorough3 - whole / consummate &
unconditional LOVE by Debra Ann Johnson
Unconditional love. Isn't that what everybody's searching for, desiring and needing? The newest R&B star, the Bachelorette and, well, me. Here I am, an older person also needing love, and desperately trying to look my best with hopes of one day meeting someone who can give me this life-changing gift. Just recently I realized that, more than anything, it was unconditional love that I wanted all along, yet I couldn’t even give myself this gift. Simply because others couldn’t accept me just as I am, neither could I. One day a simple conversation sparked something in me that made me wake up one morning feeling like I’d just been reborn. My dear mom had told me about a friend who’d just lost his mom and said that there is no unconditional love in this world except for a mother’s love and God’s love. Through that little conversation, God revealed to me something I wish
I’d known in my spirit (and not just my mind) years and years ago: He – yes, God – loves me unconditionally! I could only think of how much I love my children no matter what they do. There is literally nothing they could do that would ever make me stop loving them. I love my kids if they have bad breath and nappy hair; if they’re lazy, dirty or messy; or whatever else would make others refuse to deal with them – I would still love them because they are my children. Then I began to think, if I, a mere human, can love someone so much and without restraint, then God, my Creator, must love me so much more than I could ever love my children, and I don’t know if I can love them any more than I already do! Could it be true that this great God – all-powerful, ever-present and allknowing – loves me unconditionally?
attached. Yes, He requires me to repent for my sins but my sin never ever stops Him from loving me. Today I know I can have a relationship with God based on love, because that's the foundation of any relationship - love and respect, not fear and dread. I know that when I veer off course, my Father looks on me with compassion, and feels sorry that I'm having such a hard time trying to please Him. He probably thinks, “Doesn’t she know I love her anyway? That I want her to come to me so I can heal her, not run away from me and hide in shame?” This is how I would feel if my children were struggling. All I would want them to do is come to me so I could make it better. Yes, God loves me like that. What a wonderful God I have! Someone who loves me regardless of the circumstances, no matter how messed up I may be. He's no longer out there, distant and unreachable. He's always just a breath away when I need Him because He's come to dwell in me. He just desires that I run to Him so He can heal me Thank you, heavenly Father, for loving me unconditionally!
un c on d i ti on a l
perfect) + ualified & Wow. + thorough3 For so many years I went to church every perfect + Sunday - did all the things church folks do, nsummate & did all I knew to please this great God who unmitigated created me and the entire world - always tionable = afraid that if I did one thing wrong He complete + wouldn’t love me and was ready to bring flawless + immediate condemnation upon me. Sadly, (absolute)in the church where I raised my children, tegorical &this is how the teachings sometimes felt horough -and many times how God was depicted. ualified =And though I still value having reverent perfect &fear of our great God and Creator, now I (absolute) know deep in my spirit that He also has a tegorical &loving side. He is love. perfect) + In the past, I couldn't bring myself to ualified & pray or even read my bible when I sinned. + thorough3Why? Because I felt that God wasn’t perfect +interested in anything I had to say or do. absolute -Once again I'd made a mistake and didn't tegorical *qualify to have a relationshp with Him. assured /This negative and erroneous thinking went complete -on for so long that I've had, at the very perfect) +least, a fragmented and incomplete ualified &relationship with my Father because I could + thorough3never always be perfect. perfect + Although I've always known to ask for (absolute) forgiveness, it never felt like enough. All tegorical & along I had been missing the simple, perfect) +indisputable and indestructible fact that He ualified & loves me unconditionally, no strings lete1000 +
unconditional. Thesaurus.com. Roget's 21st Century Thesaurus, Third Edition. Philip Lief Group 2009. http://thesaurus.com/browse/unconditional (accessed: September 26, 2012).
complete1000 + unequivocal = unquestionable (perfect) + genuine - absolute / unmitigated - unqualified & consummate (assured) flawless - categorical + thorough3 whole / consummate & assured / flawless = perfect + genuine unmitigated (unqualified)2 + consummate & assured / flawless = perfect + genuine unmitigated (unqualified)2 + whole & absolute - unquestionable = thorough - unequivocal / categorical * complete + unqualified = consummate & whole - assured / flawless + perfect & genuine6 unmitigated + complete (absolute) unquestionable = thorough / unequivocal * categorical & whole & absolute - unquestionable = thorough - unequivocal / categorical * complete + unqualified = consummate & whole - assured / flawless + perfect & genuine6 unmitigated + complete (absolute) unquestionable = thorough / unequivocal * categorical & complete1000 + unequivocal = unquestionable (perfect) + genuine absolute / unmitigated - unqualified Spring 2013 | LADY 19
by Taffi Dollar
Beautiful
B
alance is the key to everything in life, which is why I wrote the book “Your Spiritual Makeover”. In today’s fast-paced, hectic world, we need to put our confidence in more than our own abilities and knowledge; these things simply will not be enough. We must begin relying on the wisdom that comes from God. It is this wisdom that teaches us how to enjoy the beauty that comes as a result of living a balanced life. I don’t want to just wear a Christian title, but I want to live a lifestyle that reflects what I truly believe. My desire is to be a woman who is growing spiritually and going to higher heights every day. Achieving these goals involves making a commitment to walk in love, study the Word, and remain connected to God through prayer. We have all been called to do great things; however, fulfilling that call requires wisdom so our lives are balanced. Over the years I have discovered the beauty of a balanced life. But what exactly does it mean to live a balanced life? When many women think of balance, they envision working a 9-to-5 job, while juggling the responsibilities of children and family. While we may be doing all these things, it does not mean our lives are balanced. According to Dictionary.com, balance is “the power or ability to decide an outcome by throwing one's strength, influence, support, or the like, to one side or the other.” A woman leads a balanced life when she allows God to be her source of strength, influence, and support. Our spiritual connection is what gives us the ability to effectively manage our lives on a daily basis. By connecting with our inner, spiritual identity through prayer, we become equipped with the wisdom we need to juggle our families, careers, and personal lives. A life without God’s guidance and wisdom will cause imbalance and frustration. Trust me, I have been there! If we find ourselves at our wit’s end—stressed out by the pressures of life, chances are we have forgotten to put first things first. We must spend quiet time each day, preferably before we get started with our usual routines, getting directions for the day and establish our goals and objectives. When we spend time with God
WWW.TAFFIDOLLAR.ORG
A Balanced Life is
first, our steps will be perfectly ordered throughout the day. We live in a society where so many things are vying for our attention, and we have a to-do list that seems to go on and on. Sometimes it seems nearly impossible to get a few moments to ourselves. However, we can trim the excess away from our daily lives and accomplish what we need to do with ease when we put things in perspective. Keeping first things first means putting our spiritual needs at the top of our priority list, and allowing everything else to follow. This enables us to streamline the day and maximize time. Whether we realize it or not, every decision we make gives us insight into what our priorities truly are. When God is first, we will make decisions that will benefit us in the long run and get results! I don’t know about you, but I am after concrete results in my life. I want to see progress in my marriage, family, business, ministry, and personal endeavors. The key to seeing positive outcomes is to take time daily to acknowledge God and allow His light to shine on everything we do. We will then feel the emotional, spiritual, mental, and physical peace that come with knowing we have handled the day’s responsibilities with ease. This is the beauty of a balanced life! Taffi Dollar, a native of Atlanta, Georgia, is a worldrenowned author, teacher, and conference speaker. She is married to Creflo Dollar, and together they co-pastor World Changers Church International (WCCI) and World Changers Church - New York.
T h r i f ty
Thri lls
FASHION
On a budget but need a fashion fix? While drastic times call for drastic measures, a lady knows how to look fabulous without breaking the bank. Your local Salvation Army, Goodwill and other charity thrift stores are perfect alternatives for beefing up your wardrobe while helping those in need. Spring 2013 | LADY 21
A Touch of Gold
Fitted white button足down shirt, Finders Keepers consignment, $7 足 Faux gold足 leaf belt, Goodwill, $2余 aviator sunglasses, WetSeal, $1.
22 LADY | Spring 2013
J. Renee pumps, Lara's Shoes, $21.
Zara Basics purple skinny pants, Goodwill, $6.
Spring 2013 | LADY 23
Kiss The
Method New York & Company yellow blazer, Goodwill, $6 足 Mossimo skinny jeans, Target, $11 足 green sunglasses, WetSeal, $1 足 Franco Sarto "Muscle" boots, Lara's Shoes, $63.
24 LADY | Spring 2013
Spring 2013 | LADY 25
Cred
Street
Express dress, Goodwill, $8 足 Claire's bracelets, $4.
26 LADY | Spring 2013
Pendant necklace, Finders Keepers consignment, $12.
Spring 2013 | LADY 27
D
OUTLOOK
MISSION
More than a Conqueror
l
Set realistic goals
Turn off the tube! really
p
p
p
Love yourself
30 LADY | Spring 2013
J
pp
The Buddy System. Use it.
B
O
Visualize Victory!
Extra! Extra! Read all about it!
N
Be Patient, and Pace Yourself.
In light of eternity our moments on earth are exactly that - mere moments. I don't intend on wasting any of them shackled by fear."
"I will watch, stand fast in my faith, be courageous and be strong. I will let all that I do be done with love." ~1 Corinthians 16:13-14
Bekah
Baker
www.bekahbaker.com
Photo Credit: Gene Fox Š 2013/www.gfox.biz
"When my time here on earth is done I want to arrive to heaven totally empty. Haven given to everyone I meet, all the love, hope, healing, encouragement, peace, & joy God placed in me to give them.
9
HEALTH NEWS
Surprising Health Benefits by Sarah Irani of Your Latte Waking up and running to the coffee maker first thing in the morning could be one of the best things you do all day! Don’t believe it? Here are a few facts about the bean most people don’t know.
1 2 4
A cup or two a day increases your sense of well-being and happiness. You can thank dopamine for that, which also contributes to coffee’s addictive nature. But be aware, the study also noted that more than 2 cups daily increases the risk of anxiety and panic attacks. For women, caffeine may prevent long term memory loss. Because caffeine is a psychostimulant, older women who drink 3 or more cups of coffee or tea a day have less memory loss and cognitive decline than their counterparts who drink less or none.
Caffeine may reduce chance of Parkinson’s Disease. A 30-year study has shown that non-coffee drinkers have a higher chance of developing Parkinson’s Disease than their coffee-drinking counterparts.
Coffee may cut colon cancer in women. A
3 12-year study on Japanese women found that drinking 3 or more cups of coffee per day may actually halve the risk of developing colon cancer.
5
Most Americans get their antioxidants from coffee. That doesn’t mean it’s the best source of antioxidants, just that it’s the most consumed. But, it’s true, coffee is very high in antioxidants
Coffee can fight cavities. Just avoid all the
Coffee reduces muscle pain. After a hard
some antibacterial properties, particularly against Streptococcus mutans, one of the major causes of cavities.
shown to reduce muscle soreness (in women, anyway) more effectively than naproxen, aspirin and ibuprofen.
Coffee may help with short term memory. An Austrian study showed that volunteers given caffeinated coffee had better reaction times and short-term memory function than those who were given the cup of decaf.
Coffee may reduce chance of death from heart disease. Studies show that drinking 4-5 cups of coffee a day can make you less likely to die from heart disease. The researchers think it may have something to do with coffee’s anti-inflammatory effects.
6 sugar and milk! Actually, roasted coffee has 7 workout, a cup or two of coffee has been 8
Source: http://ecosalon.com/20-surprising-facts-about-coffee/
9
Baroness Countess
34 LADY | Spring 2013
BC
Natural Highlights
How long have you been natural? First I'd like to thank you, for interviewing me! It's truly a honor to be inspired,and to inspire young women around the world with my natural hair experience! I've been natural for about 2 and 1/2 years. I big chopped on May 30th 2010, and never looked back! What is your hair type? That's a great question! I believe my hair can't be categorized in one type, because their are so many “types” on my head. I think this hair type, is “my hair type.”
What made you decide to go natural? I had a really bad relaxer experience, which caused my hair to become a total disaster. It was thin and lifeless. I think I didn't understand the significance of what I was doing until I looked back (as now a natural) and saw exactly what damage I was not only doing to my hair but to my health. Has sporting your natural hair affected your work environment? If so, how? Sporting my natural hair has not affected my work environment at all! Have you always liked your natural hair? If not, how did you come to embrace it? After being relaxed since 5 years old, it took a physical toll on my appearance. I didn't understand what “being natural” was. I came to terms with my natural hair when I was 3 months natural. In 2010, I didn't know about YouTube gurus or natural hair forums. All I knew was that I had chopped my hair and I thought I was the only one that did. Finally, during my third month I realized that this is me and I'm going to embrace myself in all of it's forms and what better than my natural form. What are your favorite oils/treatments? My favorite products are Shea Moisture Curl Enhancing Smoothie, Nubian Heritage
HAIR
Moringa, Paul Mitchell (conditioner). And I've grown very fond of Homemade Flax Seed Gels and Avocado Deep Masques. Have you ever had to deal with negativity about being natural? If so, how did you address it? I've dealt with negativity at times, but I always kept my head held up high. I'd laugh it off and keep on about my day. I understand that sometimes people are afraid of change...but I'm ok with that. You can find this natural lady in the social network @:
www.Youtube.com/BaronessCountess www.Facebook.com/BaronessCountess www.Instagram.com/BaronessCountess
“I have more confidence. I am created in the best image - in the best mold. And love that I am!” Spring 2013 | LADY 35
“My signature style is definitely the curly fro!�
36 LADY | Spring 2013
4
Marshawn Evans
O
Ways to Know When You're Being Called
ver the last several weeks, I’ve talked about how important it is to be directed in your choices, and not just driven. Doing so will require that you value significance over success. It will mean that you are committed to focusing on what you are called to do, not just what you can do. A common question arose after last week’s column: What You Can Do versus What You’re Called To Do. Many wanted to know how to decipher between the “could” versus the “should.” When you’ve reached a crossroad, here are some key questions that you can ask yourself to make sure your chosen path is truly purpose-driven:
1 2
What is my GUT feeling? GUT stands for God Uttering Time-out. When you feel your inner-self wrestling and wandering on a recurring basis, it is time to stop and get still. You need to spend focused time with God so that you can hear the message that is being sent to you and for you. Have I Outgrown My Garden? Ask yourself whether you are staying on your current path simply because it feels comfortable. Life is supposed to be a challenge. Your best is birthed through the process of being challenged. Take time to assess whether you’ve outgrown the garden in which you’ve been planted. All soil is not created equal! You need to be in the right place to receive the right preparation and access to the right people. It could be time to uproot and replant in new soil waiting for your arrival.
3
Am I afraid? If the path you are considering and feel drawn towards does not make sense because it feels bigger than you, then it just might be for you! God’s plans never fully make sense in the beginning. If your ability to pursue “it” seems
beyond you, pray about it first and foremost. Realize that God always asks us to operate in expectations, not experiences. He shows up when we move by faith, not by fear.
4
Are you being interrupted? You can rest assured that God’s new assignment for you will come when you lest expect it and probably when you’re already busy doing something else. Recognize that God’s seemingly imperfect timing is indeed perfect. His anointing attaches to His appointing.
Marshawn Evans is a Global Mentor and Catalyst for Women looking to Launch Their Dreams and Live Their Purpose. She equips others to AMPLIFY their lives, their leadership and their legacy by teaching the principles of influence, branding, and divine purpose. Her weekly eZine goes out to thousands of subscribers. Are you ready to unleash your brilliance and align with your REAL destiny? Sign up for a FREE subscription at
www.marshawnevans.com.
For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. (Ephesians 2:10)
So no matter what you have planned, remain pliable and prepared to go with God’s flow. Don’t fight it, ride it. Remember, obedience isn’t about knowing what to do. It’s about being willing to do what God asks of you regardless of the answer. Although you may not know exactly what next step to take, make sure you proactively ask for your steps to be ordered. Step up your prayer time. Invoke the power of declaration by speak-
ing biblical principles and promises over your choices and circumstances. And, make sure you take the day off from worry! God’s on duty and He has you covered. Finally, remember that all crossroads should lead you to the cross. Seek God’s face. Ask for his guidance. Let him direct you to the right place. Operate in and under His grace so that you properly run your race – not just doing the things you can do, but also doing that which you are called to do.
Spring 2013 | LADY 39
FEATURE
The life of a video blogger!
Always Jades Life
Belgium Next Page: Chiang Mai, top Cockatoo Island, Austrailia, bottom
40 LADY | Spring 2013
“I will always take the risks that are worth the consequences.”
Jade, tell us about the “Always Jade’s Life” project!
This project is an experiment to help you live on the brighter side and change your life! There are instructions for hysterical living. I’ve seen that people all over the world aren’t living their best life. They get stuck in the worries and routines of everyday and forget to check and refill their happiness meters. I made my new profession to experience the world and what it has to teach me.
Who comes up with these ideas? They are absolutely hilarious!
It all started from a sale at the book store. I found an amazingly hilarious book called “This Book Will Change Your Life” with 365 daily tasks. Of course I announced to myself, ‘I’m gonna do this!’ So I picked out a bunch of my favorites and got started. Later I started to accept ideas from other people as a dare.
Have you ever been caught while trying some of your riskier missions? If so, explain. If not, any close calls?
I’ve definitely had lots of close calls and an infinite amount of stares and funny looks. As early as Day 4 I thought for sure that the security guard would come over and start yelling at me. Good thing they don’t pay him enough money to glance in my direction. I got lots of hate mail from crazy serial killer lovers after I wrote that letter on Day 7. But I wasn’t discouraged! I will always take the risks that are worth the consequences. I got yelled at by security for pretending to be a Target employee, but I was leaving the store anyway. Messing with cars in a parking lot is always a risky business. Every time someone walked out of the store I wondered if they would punch me in the face for putting a crazy note on their car.
You’ve also spent a lot of time overseas! How many countries have you visited? Not counting layovers: Malaysia, Thailand, Cambodia, Belgium, France, Spain, Australia, Mexico of course, so… 8. Before that, I visited several US cities each year. Then one Saturday Afternoon I got a crazy idea to leave the country and 2 months later I was living in Barcelona, Spain.
What’s been your most memorable trip? Favorite attraction?
I’ve lived in a few countries but none were as crazy as traveling around Southeast Asia. I rode in a cab (1990 something Toyota Camry) with 8 people. I was watched and stared at the way you would stare at a snotty walking booger. Slept with bugs and/or geckos in every hotel room. Walked across borders with giant backpacks. Ate strange mystery food. Stayed on a hot train for 17 hours without using the bathroom. The list goes on and on. The people of Spain have very fun spirits and the country has unique architecture. The cities of France have beautiful landscapes and
42 LADY | Spring 2013
Ko chang Swing
“The only obstacles in your life are the ones you create. There are no obstacles. If you don’t see them, they don’t exist. It’s just another step toward your goal. It’s not a negative thing. It can actually be positive in many ways. I’ve learned a lot from so-called obstacles.”
Spring 2013 | LADY 43
Australia has a laid back lifestyle complimented by amazing beaches. It’s impossible to have a favorite attraction when it’s so hard to compare them.
Do you have any fears when you travel?
More like precautions than fears. For example, I try to not to carry a purse or bag that can be snatched away. I always try to make friends right away so that I’m not alone in the city. After backpacking in Southeast Asia, there’s not much more out there to be afraid of. I prefer to focus on all the awesomeness that surrounds me anyway. I find that positivity attracts positivity just like negative things happen to people with negative vibes.
Lately, you’ve been participating in flash mobs. What got you into that? Describe the experience (feeling)!
Some friends in France showed me a video of a huge flash mob a couple years ago. I had no idea what or why they were. Then a few months later I got an email from the science center (which I love) asking me to participate in a flash mob. You can guess what my response was. It was one of the most fun experiences I’ve ever had, and I’ve had quite a few. Flash mobbin’ should be on everyone’s bucket list. But beware, they are addicting. When the ‘spontaneous’ dance is over you just have an overwhelming feeling to do it again. They’ve become a strange kind of drug for me. I get my fix when and wherever I can. It feels good to be part of creating happiness and it’s always great to learn a dance with like-minded strangers.
Growing up, were there things you did as a child that you believe has brought you into doing the things you do now? If so, what were they?
There were many events, situations and people that have helped to create my insane sanity so I’ll just name a few. I’m so clumsy it’s like a disability I’ve learned to live with. As a result, I had to learn humility at a very young age, meaning I’m not easily embarrassed. Also, I started flying from KC to L.A. alone, to visit family, when I was 4 or 5. I think this not only wiped out any fear of traveling I might have developed but
it also sparked an interest to explore new places and take advantage of opportunities. As a kid, each time I asked my mom for something she would tell me I could have it if I bought it myself. So as soon as I started school, in kindergarten, I started selling bubble gum to my classmates at 100% profit. The business of soliciting classmates evolved through the years (taking candy orders, selling toy jewelry, making a magazine and selling subscriptions with Sherry, etc.) until I was able to get a real job at age 14.
How would your closet friends describe you?
Hmm, I may have to ask a couple friends… So I asked 4 people, here’s what they said: • The most adventurous person I know! No task has ever been too great for her to accomplish. • Full of energy and happiness. Always positive, simple and open-minded. • Upbeat, curious, optimistic, goofy, selfmotivated. Successful at whatever she puts her mind to. • Lover of life who lives without fear.
When considering your video projects and your love for travel, what are your future goals? Are there any new projects in the making?
“Being weird just means that you’re thinking or living outside of the box.”
Chantilly, France I would like to see the UK or Italy next. I think my next project will be to make a music video to show that I’ve relocated to Vegas. My lifestyle has become so nomadic that almost no one was surprised that I was moving to a new city. Since people aren’t surprised by my randomness, I might settle just to get a reaction. Just kidding.
Outside of all of your adventures, you are also a very normal person. I understand you’re a teacher. What ages and subject do you teach? When I travel I teach English as a second language. Otherwise, I teach middle school science. I connect
easily to young people, making my job a bit easier. I’m not sure that makes me a normal person though. Normal has come to mean average and the average adventurer isn’t usually very average. All people have a sense of adventure but not enough of them embrace it. No one lies on their death bed and says, ‘I wish I would have worked more’. I ask my 108 year old self, ‘What do you wish you would have done during your life?’ Then I do it.
What’s your philosophy on embracing life?
Today is almost yesterday and it was also tomorrow. Make tomorrow today. My grandma always said, ‘Don’t say I can’t, say I won’t’. Get started on living, don’t underestimate your worth. Live your life exactly the way you want. Reach for the stars and know that you can actually reach them.
What advice would you give other women who feel locked in a box but crave adventure? First figure out what it is you want. How can you seek happiness when you don’t even know what you’re looking for? Only you can create your happiness. It can’t be given to you. Recognize and acknowledge the walls of the box you live in. You don’t have to step out of the box right away. Start by expanding the parameters, push the walls and make the box a little bigger. Being weird just means that you’re thinking or doing outside of that box.
www.AlwaysJadesLife.com
Compiegn, France
46 LADY | Spring 2013
Paris, France
“The only person that can take away your freedom is you. So be free!”
Spring 2013 | LADY 47
PERSONAL JOURNEY
“With My Body, I Will
Glorify God”
E
Whether therefore ye eat, or drink,, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God. ~1 Corinthians 10:31
by Tina Jasper
xercise for me has always been a bit of a challenge. My mind would usually be ready to hit the pavement first thing in the morning but my feet were far from ready. As a teenager I didn’t engage in a lot of extracurricular activities. It seemed as if my body worked against me more than anything. With asthma and constant shin splints, my dreams of becoming a track star was short lived. For years I avoided making physical activity a habit. I’m glad that I don’t have that testimony anymore. Now I run approximately 10 miles a week, engage in regular weight training and also attend weekly aerobics classes. My decision to engage myself in physical activities stems from my desire to glorify God...with my body. I’ll never forget the night I ran across Isaiah 43:7 which says “Even every one that is called by my name: for I have created him for my glory...” and also 1 Corinthians 6:20 which says “For ye are bought with a price; therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.” When I read these two scriptures I really began to ask myself how I could glorify God better so that in turn others would see Him through my living. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Since I have always wanted to be physically active, I thought, why not exercise during my dedicated time for prayer and meditation? Of course this sounds completely unconventional but to me it made perfect sense. I recalled another
Photo Credit: Andres Rodrigues, StockFresh.com
scripture that says in our weakness He is strong. Although I felt physically limited in my abilities, this would be a great way to take my focus off the process of exercising and instead meditate on the strength of God. Maybe it would help me better complete my sessions? I even went as far as changing my eating habits this way. When I initially started working out it was extremely hard because I started having intense shin aches. Icing my legs had become as routine as my exercise program but I kept at it. I recited scriptures as I worked out. I started singing verses from Psalms to upbeat instrumental music. When I ran or got on the elliptical, I clapped my hands and imagined myself celebrating with the angels to keep my momentum. Workouts became easier and easier. Eventually the pain stopped and I never had breathing problems due to asthma. I know that it was God’s strength that kept me going because I was driven to stay committed all the way through the pain. In spite of physical challenges, I began to experience a new peace. I became aware that God was actually teaching me to fully rely on him for strength. Not just through exercise but in life as well. Now that I’ve gotten stronger, I’m able to encourage other women who are where I used to be. Nothing gives me greater joy than to know that God can use me to encourage other women to glorify him through the pain, either in fitness or in life.
Precious Johnson-Arabidg
IN THE SPOTLIGHT
Lady Magazine “Let us go over to the other side...” ~Luke 8:22
IN THE SPOTLIGHT
Congratulates our very own on her new job!
YOU ROCK! Deputy Conflicts Officer & Regulatory Affairs Associate Georgetown University, Washington D.C.
FOOD
Fork-Tender Pot Roast
Photo credit: Robyn Mackenzie, Stockfresh.com
50 LADY | Spring 2013
Tools
Ingredients
Preparation
Enjoy! Spring 2013 | LADY 51
“Let The Church
PRAISE by Sherry E. Livingston
THE
holy. Shockingly many Christians seem to ignore God’s call to a life of consecration, which reflects the fruits of the Spirit, particularly self-control (Gal. 5:22-23). The churchgoers’ problem with self-control is startlingly apparent when we walk through the church doors: often more than half of a congregation is either overweight or severely obese. Occasionally one such member is invited to the pulpit to exhort the other
LARD”
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. ~Romans 12:1
I
f you believe that being overweight is an acceptable way of life, you’re mistaken. Our physical well-being is a critically important facet of personal fulfillment because the health of our bodies affects virtually every area of life; from the quality of life to spiritual effectiveness. Many Christians base their assessments of spiritual maturity on church attendance and vocal cadences, while others feel compelled to achieve educational advancement to validate their relationships with God. Other saints believe that as long as they can recite those “common scripture verses” in and out of conversation they can convince the world that they spend unlimited amounts of time reading the Bible, thus making them
Photo Credit: Getty Images
saints to reach the lost and minister to addicts while she stares off into a room of people suffering food addictions and even those swimming in complacency. Sometimes we put more emphasis on the sins of the world, condemning others to hell all while ignoring scripture that tells us no sin is greater than the next. “For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking all of it.” James 2:10 One portion of the law is as much binding as another and if you’re violating one part, it makes the
authority of God to no effect. We must realize that a lack of self discipline leads to sin. Complacency leads to sin. Proverbs 1:32 states “the complacency of fools will destroy them.” Webster defines complacency as “self-satisfied” and “unconcerned” and it is this very behavior that leads to the introduction and embracing of sin. We are to continually examine ourselves as Paul urges in 2 Corinthians 13:5. Just like the devastating effects of substance abuse, food addiction can ultimately destroy the physical body. It comes as no surprise that the body of Christ is held at a higher standard and rightfully so. Christians are representatives of Jesus Christ Himself. They are His ambassadors and the light shinning in a dark world. But when it comes to righteousness, Christians might quickly attest to being the cream of the crop despite their lack of self discipline when it comes to dietary restraints and physical activity. Physical health seems to be the most neglected aspect of well-being among churchgoers. Does the state of the physical body indicate the condition of the spirit man? The Christian says, “Pray for the unsaved to be delivered from alcoholism.” The non-Christian, on the other hand, might say, “Those Christians need to be delivered from gluttony.” Being a Christian is not about throwing stones but personal improvement so that others will be drawn to the Father by your good works. “In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.” Matt. 5:16 It’s more than regular church attendance and Godly Facebook posts. As Christians, we are called to a life set apart for service like the early disciples. Looking closely at the lives of Biblical patriarchs, we clearly see how the consecration of those like Samson, John the Baptist and many other Nazarenes required obedience and yielding to certain dietary or lifestyle restrictions. While we serve a God who gives us free will, we also serve a God who freely gives wisdom through His word in order for us to be effective in our calling as “set apart Christians.” Take note of the detrimental consequences of disobedience. We all know what
happened to Samson. A good way to examine at your commitment to God’s ordinances would be to compare your habits to Romans 12:1. “Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship.” Easily the Christian can find fault in the girl who uses her body to fund her college education or the street walker who has sacrificed herself to the whim of men to provide dinner for her children; but where is the emphasis on how some indulge in fat-saturated, hearty meals after Sunday service? It’s rarely preached how the Christian spends more time on her knees praying for “Boaz” and avoids “Bowflex.” First Corinthians 6:19 tells us that our bodies are the temple for the indwelling Holy Spirit. God cannot complete his work on the earth without the human body. He needs each and every one of us to reach those He loves but His mission is hindered when the very people He has set aside for His work do not care for their physical health. Have you ever gone to church and observed the amount of people who approach the altar at the “healing” call? The prayer leader urges the congregation to come into agreement for Sister So-inso that she is healed once and for all of diabetes and Brother What’s-his-name to receive healing for high blood pressure when their healing could be linked to mere dietary obedience. Many health problems among blacks stem from diet. From diabetes to heart disease, from high blood pressure to arthritis, these diseases plague our communities and obesity has become an epidemic. We all love a good celebratory dinner and look forward to big mama’s cooking over the holidays but it is vitally important that we take a much needed assessment of our food choices and the amount of time we dedicate to exercise throughout the year. As we do this, some will admit that we are guilty of quickly judging our neighbor of erroneous behavior while we too commit the same acts but in a different way. The non-Christian world seems to have a good grasp on the importance of physical health. While extreme in some respects, celebrities understand that their bodies and dietary choices not only decide job opportunities but also represent their brand,
presenting opportunities to market who they are and what they believe. It comes as no surprise that many non-believers are drawn to finely tuned bodies, glam and the like, and indeed, even Christians are lured by these images. And like it or not, the Christian life is in constant competition with the Kardashians, Real Housewives and the latest American idol - but how are the non-believers supposed to be receptive to ministry when there are so many obese and physically ill people in the church? God’s desire is that you “prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers” (3 John 1:2). When we are prosperous spiritually, there are certain character traits that manifest through our living. “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and selfcontrol” (Galatians 5:22-23). Self-control is, hands down, one of the hardest fruits to cultivate in your daily living if you are not connected to God. Without self-control, we ignore portion control; we eat what we know could send us into a diabetic coma and leave us with indigestion; we go back for seconds (sometimes thirds); and we disregard the health risks of certain types of foods. It takes a lot of discipline to get your body into tip top shape, let alone change a lifetime of poor eating habits. John offers an excellent perspective of what’s achievable to those who actively seek balance in their spiritual and physical lives. Self-control and discipline are not just essential in spiritual matters but are essential in the physical realm as well. Is it really fair to condemn your neighbor who struggles with obvious sins when you too battle your own? When you often ignore God command towards moderation, is it fair to judge your neighbor’s spiritual place in God who openly commits acts contrary to His moral will?? “Let your moderation be known unto all men.” Philippians. 4:5 Is it fair to determine the destiny of your neighbor who falls short of the glory of God when you too miss the mark? In Luke 18, Jesus tells his disciples a story about a man who makes a career of cheating people out of their tax money. This man and a self-righteous Pharisee
both enter into a temple to pray. The Pharisee goes before God in thanksgiving that he is not a sinner as he compares himself to the corrupt publican. He boasts about the sins that he doesn’t do and gloats about the things he does do. In contrast, the publican, in total humility, goes into prayer feeling as though he isn’t even worthy enough to look towards heaven because of his sinfulness. In his sorrow, he calls out to God and admits his shortcomings. He asks for forgiveness and it was him who returns home forgiven. Jesus warns us “the proud shall be humbled, but the humbled shall be honored” (Luke 18:14). Although God gives us free will to eat what we desire and never requires us to make exercise a daily practice, we are obligated to maintain the body that He has given us in this life. As Christians we must be careful not to judge the lives of non-believers who do not live up to our “standard of righteousness” when many of us stubbornly neglect the most important vehicle of the Holy Spirit. The key to spiritual prosperity is to seek balance in all areas of life, including the physical. Don’t be afraid to suffer for the sake of consecration. Prayer and fasting are spiritual tools necessary to bring the flesh under subjection. Disciplining yourself will protect you from unforeseen illnesses and allow you to be the best ambassador for Christ that you can be. An ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure.
Hummm...Interesting...... More than 1/3 of US adults are obese. Center for Disease Control and Prevention, www.cdc.gov In 2008, medical costs associated with obesity were estimated at $147 billion; the medical costs for people who are obese were $1429 higher than those of normal weight. Center for Disease Control and Prevention, www.cdc.gov A study done by Northwestern University tracked 2,433 participants, 41% of which were African Americans, for 18 years and found that those who attended one religious event weekly [were] more at risk for becoming obese. www.frugivormag.com
TACTICS
N
Domestic abuse, also known as spousal abuse, occurs when one person in an intimate relationship or marriage tries to dominate and control the other person.
for CONTROL
• Dominance Abusive individuals tend to need to feel in charge. They make decisions for you, may treat you like a child or even a servant. • Humiliation An abuser will do whatever he/she can to make you feel like no one wants you. They publicly put you down to destroy your self-esteem and make you feel powerless. • Isolation An abuser will try to keep you away from the outside world to make you feel dependent on him/her. He/she may prevent you from even associating with family. • Intimidation Abusers try to intimidate to bring others into submission. They use scare tactics to manipulate your thoughts. • Denial and blame Abusers make good excuses for inexcusable behavior. He/she may find ways to shift the responsibility on you and make their behavior your fault.
C
C
oncern or ontrol?
Recognizing Abusive Behavior
T
oo often we hear about domestic abuse in our society as we are briefed by the news when it reports the death of its most recent victim. Each time we hear details of how the tragic events played out while anxiously imagining what could have lead to the ultimate act by the perpetrator. It comes at no surprise hearing that the victim made disturbing statements about previous incidences yet the problem was overlooked, excused, or denied. These tell-tell symptoms forewarned her of his emotional instability. It’s not uncommon for young women to develop relationships with men who express deep concern for her. He checks on her throughout the day, casually calling to see where she is and making sure she’s arrived home safely. She feel a sense of security knowing that someone thinks about her and makes extra effort to show her how important she is. It is in large one of the most flattering expressions of a caring relationship, however, there are some signs to look for that could indicate a more serious issue that could easily get under the radar. Here are a few tactics abusers are known to use to control their partners either emotionally or psychologically. If you feel like you are experiencing any of these you may be a victim of abuse and should seek help immediately.
National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233
Spring 2013 | LADY 55
? t e g d bu t h g i On a t Need to t reat you rself?
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