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contents
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women in the news taste of home mom’s world daphne petrey young at heart power in the purse mary helen cole living well kari’s home for women marriage and family corner peggy eller children’s council farm camp high country courtesies donna gragg pretty in pink travel betty greene beauty sallie woodring by the book
peggy eller
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editor’s note
Have we really arrived at another August? It seems like just yesterday that families were celebrating the last day of school and the mini vans were being packed and leaving a trail of dust as they quickly sped toward the coast or other parts promising fun in the sun. To say it has been a short summer is the same as saying we blinked. Even if “summer vacation” doesn’t hold the same weight for us who no longer have school children at home, we can still feel the pain of reality for those who do. Summer, for many, has indeed passed too quickly — luggage is emptied of swimsuits and sandals, and backpacks are being filled with notebooks and pencils. Leisure picnics in the park will soon be replaced with rushed lines in the school cafeteria. Late night campouts under the stars and S’mores by the fire pit will be pushed away for late nights under the kitchen lights and textbooks spread across the dinner table. Hopefully, most everyone will resume some sense of normalcy without too much distress as the calendar page turns, yet again. We, at All About Women, hope to make your lives easier and more enjoyable as you flip through the following pages, finding delightful stories about women of all ages, sage advice from those who know, as well as a few highlights for the days to come. In addition to the Back2School Festival — about which parents of school children need to read without delay — is the exciting news that our parent company, Mountain Times Publications, is hosting the area’s first Taste of Home Cooking School in September. Tickets are going fast, so don’t delay in claiming your spot for this rare opportunity to spend a delightful evening being entertained — while learning new tips and cooking techniques to last a lifetime. With that in mind, at least three of our columnists are focusing on food this month, just to whet your appetite for greater things to come. So, August, here we are — ready for whatever you bring our way. Please, make it good.
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WOMENINTHENEWS Beauty Queen in Boone
Photo submitted
Appearing in the recent July 4 parade in Boone was Campbell Lindquist, the 2016 National American Miss North Carolina Junior Teen. Campbell earned the prestigious title at the state pageant held in Winston Salem. She will compete in the national pageant in Anaheim Ca., in November, where she will have the opportunity to win her share of over $500,000 in scholarships and prizes. Campbell is the daughter of Kurt and Sherry Lindquist of Morganton and granddaughter of Russell and Cosby Cornett of Boone. She is the niece of Bob and Marvella Baker, also of Bonne. Campbell was driven by Bob Baker and her brother, Declan Lindquist.
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WOMENINTHENEWS The Bear Amanda Sorrow of Banner Elk was the first female finisher of The Bear footrace at Grandfather Mountain. Sorrow, a Bear veteran, completed the challenge with a time of 38:06.1. Photo by Rob Moore
Jill Storelli ties world deadlifting with personal trainer Michael Darling at her side.
Breaking the record After years of training at the Paul H. Broyhill Wellness Center in Boone, Jill Storelli, a 72-year-old weightlifter recently tied the deadlifting world record for her age group — at 230 pounds. This mother of four, and grandmother of 10, has had many challenges to overcome in her lifetime, including cancer and a neck injury, the later of which resulted in excruciating nerve pain and related problems. Her next goal? "To break another world record, of course."
Scholars & Scones: Abstract Evolvement The Fiber Arts of Ineke Thomas The work of artist Ineke Thomas will be exhibited in the Community Meeting Room of the Blowing Rock Art and History Museum during the month of August, in conjunction with a talk about her art at 11 a.m. Aug. 25. The opening reception for her exhibit will be held 5 – 6:30 Aug. 11 at BRAHM. Years of quilt making allowed Ineke to look at fibers in new ways as she began constructing abstract fiber and mixed media art. She chooses “found objects with intention,” and mixes them with a variety of additional media, including metals, pottery pieces, cardboard, feathers, buttons, small pebbles and rusted items, among others. A native of Holland, Ineka moved to a rubber and oil palm plantation on the Island of Sumatra, Indonesia until returning to Holland
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at the age of 12. A pen pal relationship that began in 1962 brought her to North Carolina in 1964 where she met her (late) husband, Lowell, of almost 50 years. A graduate of UNC-Greensboro with bachelor’s degrees in German and French education, and a master’s degree in French education at Appalachian State University. She is a substitute French teacher at Watauga High School. A mother of two adult daughters, Ineka lives in Blowing Rock. She participated in her first exhibition in 2011 when one of her works was selected for a juried exhibition in the Halpert Biennial Competition at the Turchin Center in Boone. She has also participated in BRAHM’s Artists at Edgewood exhibition.
Taste of Home Cooking School
comes to Boone Those of us who subscribe to Taste of Home and its sister publication, Quick Cooking, glance across the magazines’ opening pages each month in search of the closest cooking school. And, without fail — until recently — we’ve been disappointed to see that nothing was planned within a relatively short drive from the High Country. What a delight to learn that Boone is on the current list of upcoming Taste of Home Cooking School locations, and among more than 200 events across the country this year. It all takes place beginning at 6 p.m. on Saturday, Sept. 10, when Mountain Times Publications brings America’s No.1 leading cooking school to Watauga High School. Culinary specialist Renee Morgan will lead a two-hour demonstration of exciting recipes and provide step-by-step instructions on how to create satisfying and flavorful dishes. It’s our turn to share the same experience that some 140,000 enthusiastic attendees experience at these events across the country each year.
The Taste of Home Cooking School will not only provide entertaining and relatable cooking instruction for our local audience, as it does routinely nationwide, but it will also provide each attendee with a gift bags filled with goodies from national and local sponsors, Taste of Home magazines and money-saving coupons. Before the main event, attendees will also be able to visit vendor booths and learn more about some of our area businesses and the services they offer. If you’re in search of new recipes, hope to perfect a technique or just want to pick up a few of the latest kitchen tips, the upcoming Taste of Home Cooking School is for you. Tickets are $18 and are available online at www.brownpapertickets.com/event/2567543 or by visiting WataugaDemocrat.com and clicking the link at top for “Taste of Home Tickets.” A portion of proceeds will benefit the Hunger and Health Coalition in Boone. Seating is general admission.
AAWMAG.COM | AUGUST 2016
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mom’sworld
Mean
Mom
Recently when leaving a baseball tournament, my husband took note of the license plate as another family was exiting the parking lot. He told me about it, and my kids chimed in that I should get one. It read, “MEANMOM.” I rolled my eyes at the kids, and mentally listed all the not-so-mean things I had done for them in the previous two hours, let alone the prior two days, two weeks and two years. “I’m not mean,” I said emphatically, straining to elicit some type of validation that their label was completely inappropriate. There were a few chuckles, but no outright, “We’re just kidding — you’re the best” — that I thought would have been nice to follow. The label definitely did not seem to apply when I mailed my middle son a box of homemade, ooey gooey, chocolatebutterscotch chip bar cookies to his camp — where he and his cabin mates reportedly devoured them in less than five minutes. I certainly wasn’t mean when I allowed my youngest son to forego finishing up his room cleaning on a Saturday afternoon, so that friends could come
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over and replay ‘Lord of the Flies’ in my backyard — after already having climbed several rock faces that morning with their wrestling team buddies. Nor, did mean seem the right adjective when I gave my oldest son a pass on household cleaning so that he could build his new desktop computer from the motherboard and processor on up. On the flip side, I can think of those times when “mean” probably arose in my kid’s heads, where my innate mothering intuition and knowledge lead me to tell them “no” when they asked (or failed to ask) to do something. Back to baseball, I was surprised to note that I had to spell out to my youngest son Ben, that, just because he brought his own money to the ball field, did not mean that he could spend all of it on getting four different types of candy — and then proceed to eat them all in a 30-minute period. After the first lecture, I stared at the two wrappers and two additional pieces of candy and told him not to eat any more. Later, when starting a load of clothes in the washing machine, and
wanting to avoid putting a CowTail through the wash, I thought to ask him where the other pieces of candy were. “I don’t know what happened to them, exactly,” was his reply with a sheepish grin. “Mmm-hmmm,” I muttered. Sometimes, the meanness we moms have could be seen as trivial — like the CowTail; however, other times it is because of that maternal awareness of the potential dangers in this world. It is instinctual and Darwinian that we caution, scold and reign our children in when their boundary testing threatens their safety. At these points in time, I think we just have to own the meanness for their own good, knowing it is not a mothering act that will be nearly as popular as the cookies or the friends coming over. As much as I want to be close to my children, and have them talk to me and like me, protecting them and helping them grow into bright, responsible people takes precedence over them being my best friends. I want to teach them that some circumstances are not worth staying in, some risks are not worth taking — and some bad choices can have
long-term consequences. I believe that, sometimes, kids have it so good that they lack the ability to recognize what situations are worthy of door-slamming anger or frustration. One situation made abundantly clear to me the saying, “Everything is relative.” I met a woman once who said she had been in a previously very physicallyabusive relationship and had gotten out, but her current relationship was less than ideal. Although she no longer had physical violence, her boyfriend struggled with alcoholism, as had many people in her own family. When I asked her if she wanted help to leave an at-times verbally abusive relationship, she said, “No, I’ve been through much worse. I’m all right.” She then told me about family members turning over furniture in drunken rages that made her current situation pale in comparison. I felt great sadness for her resignation at staying in her relationship, but I also tried to imagine how hard her life must have been to have that kind of outlook. It made me think a lot about how important I think it is to help our children understand their own self-worth, how to set and achieve goals, how we (their parents) are always going to be there for them and how everything in life is relative. If you think you have a hard life, there is someone else whose life has been harder. Every day should be about giving thanks for what you have and helping others to have more love in their life because of you. My children have a lifetime to look back on my acts of so-called meanness, and realize that their perception lacked the perspective that you gain after you see others who have had no parents or real parental figures, or whose day-to-day struggles are stone cold real. So, here I am, the “mean mom:” loving my kids — even when they don’t think so — and doing my best to parent them and give them an appreciation for love, life, giving of oneself, learning and success as an individual and as part of a community and our world. May I do my job well.
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AAWMAG.COM | AUGUST 2016
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“I Have a Brother — My Brother is in Heaven”
Daphne Petrey, author of the book, “I Have a Brother —My Brother is in Heaven,” is pictured here with her husband, Dustin Petrey, and their daughters, Ruthie, LeeAnne and Julie. Photos submitted This scene, depicted in the book, helps define the Petrey family and their journey through grief.
New book tells Petrey family’s journey through son’s death “Life can be hard, but we know that God is still good.” Those are the words of Daphne Petrey, a loving wife, mother and daughter who has recently written a book about the death of her infant son, Daniel Lee Petrey. “I Have a Brother —My Brother is in Heaven” is told in the voice of Petrey’s oldest child, Ruthie Petrey, and shares the story of Daniel’s brief time here on earth — and most importantly, how his life and death have not been in vain. “In about 30 minutes on one snowy Saturday morning in January 2015, I wrote the words to the book that God kept laying on my heart,” says Daphne. “That was the easy part.” Next came prayers for God to lead her to an illustrator, a designer — and funding — all of which the Lord clearly provided in his time, she says. Then, Daphne says, while beginning to research how to write and publish a book — she also began to realize the huge task lay ahead. “But I knew Philippians
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4:13 was true and just clung to it: “I can do all things through him who gives me strength.” Choosing to self-publish was a decision that God confirmed each step of her journey, she adds. “When I have had needs, he has provided for them. I have been so overwhelmed by the Lord’s provision and confirmation at each next step.” Additionally, Daphne’s husband, Dustin, had recommended she establish a blog, and again, she says, “ The Lord showed me one more piece of the puzzle.” Daphne’s original vision has grown to also include a devotion book for other grieving moms, she said, “to point them to the Lord who is sovereign and loves us even when it is hard to understand what is happening in our lives.”
Expecting Daniel “In January 2007, we were enjoying life with our 18-month-old daughter,
Ruthie, and anticipating the birth of our first son, Daniel Lee, in mid-February of that year,” Daphne says. In her 36th week of pregnancy, she began seeing her obstetrician weekly. Her first visit was on a Monday,” she recalls. “Daniel’s heart rate was good and the pregnancy seemed to be as normal and healthy as I had with Ruthie.” That Thursday, she didn’t think Daniel had moved; feeling the same on Friday, she decided to go to the hospital for a non-stress test, which led to an ultrasound and the decision to have a Cesarean section. “Daniel’s heart rate was not recovering quickly, and his diaphragm seemed to not be making movements,” Daphne explains. “I was pretty upset at the idea of having a Cesarean, but Dustin quickly helped me to see the value in such. If I had a choice between life, or death for our son, I would, of course, choose life and a little scar for me, over death for him.” Soon after the ultrasound, Daphne
was hooked up to machines for the surgery — and no heartbeat was found. “I am told that my son was delivered very quickly,” she says. “He was born blue, not breathing and with no heart beat.” The doctors and nurses were at a loss for words in their attempt to comfort her, Daphne recalls. “Some of them actually cried in my recovery room. I told them all that I trusted the Lord, and whether Daniel lived or died, I still trusted him.” Two days later, Daniel died. “The days and weeks and months that followed Daniel’s birth and death were the hardest I had ever had,” Daphne says. “I experienced emotions that I had never felt before. My life was changed forever. I felt all alone, even in a room full of people.”
Moving forward Fast-forward about six years. “The Lord gave me a children’s story for families who lose a baby, told from Ruthie’s point of view,” Daphne says. “I did not write it down at the time, but I thought it was a great idea for someone to write a story like that!” Daphne says the story idea kept coming to her mind again and again. In December 2014, she was facing a surgery to remove a lump. “There was not a great chance that it was cancerous, but we wanted to make sure,” she said. So, she made a deal with the Lord. “I do not recommend making deals with the Lord. He is sovereign and he doesn’t need you or me — but he is gracious enough to allow us to be part of his plan,” she explains. “The ‘deal’ I made was this — if the growth is not cancerous, I will write that book you keep bringing to mind,” she says. The growth was not cancerous, and Daphne praised the Lord, she says. Then, she remembered the “deal.” “After Daniel died, I was so sad in my heart, but I knew that God was good and that He would work everything out for His good, she recalls. “But it did not seem good to have lost my son – so how was the Lord going to work this out? I just could not bridge the gap between the Lord’s promises and what had just happened in my life.”
It was not easy to “get there,” she says. “Grief is hard work. It can take everything in you. There were times when I could not sleep and other times when I did not want to wake.” Daphne spent months, she admits, trying to read God’s word and trying to pray – but so frustrated. “I wish someone could have told me it was OK to hurt.” She made it through the holidays, but she dreaded every January —not only did it mark Daniel’s birth, but also his death. “And the dreary Boone weather did not help,” she says. One night while driving an elderly lady home from a Bible study, Daphne was reminded of a stark reality: “She told me the time for grieving was over. At first, I thought, how dare she say that, but I began to realize the truth in her words. It’s OK to grieve, but what was I going to do with this gift that God has given me? Yes, Daniel’s life was a gift, so what was I going to do with it?” So it was that Daphne was inspired by God to write the book about Daniel’s life, as well as an Internet blog and a devotion book for moms, the latter of which is a work in progress. The “process” is not something Daphne understood, she says, “until I went through it myself.”
Back to a loving God It is Daphne’s hope and prayer that the words she has written — whether in print or on the blog – will point people, especially those who have suffered the loss of a child, back to a loving God who we can all trust regardless of our situations. Furthermore, she adds. “I hope they will turn back to God more quickly than I did. It wasn’t that I turned from God or tried to run away from him, I just didn’t know how to face him. I knew I could trust him, but what just happened seemed so awful.” With time, healing began — and through it all, Daphne and her family have helped each other and are now helping others through their journey. “As a family, we talk about Daniel and have tried not to put him in a box on a shelf,” she shares “Our three girls have talked about Daniel a lot, and sometimes as if he is still with us. He will always be
an important part of our lives.” In addition to the blog and devotion book, Daphne is seeing other doors opening to her, including the opportunity to teach a class on how to self publish children’s books at the Watauga County Library (July 15), and to sign books at Cornerstone (July 23). Through Daniel’s death, Daphne has been blessed with a unique ministry and is reaching out to others who have lost or miscarried a child. In the book are also mentions of other local families who endured similar loss — and pictures of their children, including that of Daniel. “While I do feel like the Lord gave me this story, I did not make it into the book that it is alone, she says. “The Lord has provided the right people to do the right jobs, including illustrator, Kay Chin Bishop, graphic designer, Alison Hoskins, as well as those who encouraged/ urged me to finish this project, and even people to give generously so that it could be completed. I have thanked him so many times for giving me just what I needed when I needed it.” Reading the story “over and over again,” reminds Daphne of the days when it really happened — “And I am so thankful to be on this side of the journey, but also thankful for the Lord’s goodness to me throughout this journey! I know what it’s like to be in a state of grief – it’s just like yesterday that it happened, but I don’t live there anymore.” “I Have a Brother – My Brother is in Heaven” is now available at the following locations: In Boone at The Cornerstone Bookstore, Boone Drug, Appalachian Auto Glass, Mountaineer Sheet Metal and Serendipity Hair Salon; In West Jefferson at Martha Mae’s Emporium; and in Wilkesboro, at For Heaven’s Sake. Online book sales are also available through Petrey’s blog at www.carrythemforever.com.
sherrie norris Editor, All About Women
AAWMAG.COM | AUGUST 2016
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FOODOSOPHY I have been called a food snob. This could be for a number of reasons: I have eaten at the restaurants of a few celebrity chefs, I have a genuine fondness for unusual ingredients, I embrace world cuisines and I expect all of my meals to be delicious. My husband Roger and I enjoy seeking out interesting restaurants at home and abroad, and we cook a lot. I am going to be so bold as to state that I am a good cook. I have learned a great deal over the years about flavor profiles and food preparation from working in the food services industry. My approach to eating, or foodosophy, includes such firm-held beliefs as, “Life’s too short to eat bad food!” and “Chocolate makes everything better!” Read on for a few others.
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youngatheart
F O O D O
Fashion and food have a lot in common. Just as your personal style determines your favorite attire, your palate determines your favorite foods. Do not be afraid to experiment to find what works for you. Open your taste buds. I seek out new and unexpected flavor combinations, knowing that by embracing, rather than avoiding, the so-called strange or unusual, I am constantly expanding and refining my palate. Octopus, like okra, is regular food somewhere. An ingredient or cuisine is only strange or unusual until you have tried it. You may discover a new favorite; if nothing else, you can check off another item on those online “How Many Have You Eaten” quizzes. Do not eliminate an entire food group. I hate to hear anyone say, “I hate curry.” “What kind?” I always ask. Indian curries, Thai curries, Chinese curries and others each feature different flavors and ingredients — no two are exactly alike and all deserve a fair taste. The same can be said for any other food group — squash, fish, pickles, etc. That being said, for me, organs are the exception to the rule. Organization equals better menuing. I keep a database of my recipes — 199 and counting — and with these, I plan a weekly menu. I shop based on this menu, only purchasing the ingredients for that week’s meals. This helps me ensure that we eat an interesting rotation of foods, and that nothing gets forgotten at the back of the refrigerator or pantry.
While it may take years and many meals to find your own foodosophy, the main thing to remember is that being open to new foods and flavors is a great way to spice things up. When in doubt, remember the words of that great song lyricist, Weird Al Yankovic and “just eat it!”
S
Seek out new recipes. I have recently been adding to my list of recipes, thanks to a Try the World subscription that I gifted Roger. Try the World works with chefs to curate a box of food items from their home country. The selection is accompanied by recipes and suggested uses. We have had lots of fun learning how to use each month’s items and eating the result. I also suggest learning to recreate favorite dishes from restaurants you have visited.
O P H
Opt for locally-owned restaurants. Does it bother anyone else that chain restaurants serve food that tastes and looks exactly the same across the country (and possibly the world) with no respect to geography or season? I prefer to eat local with the locals.
Y
You do not have to like it, but you do have to try it! Preferably, more than once and prepared different ways, before making a determination. I do not like mushrooms, bananas or melons; I revisit these items from time to time just in case something has changed. It has not! Also, go ahead and skip the sea cucumber — I have tried it so that you do not have to. It is, to put it politely, not my favorite.
Pricy does not necessarily mean delicious. I have found amazing food at both high-end restaurants and shabby hole-in-the-walls. I do not mind paying a premium for an exquisite meal; what I cannot stomach is paying high prices for food that is, at best, satisfactory. Highlight a few well-prepared quality ingredients. Great food can and should be simple and approachable. Anyone who has ever watched a cooking competition knows that chefs get in trouble when they try to put too much on a plate. Sometimes, less is more! And, think seasonally — that is when produce will be at its peak!
heather brandon Considers life to be one big anthropological field experience. She observes and reports. She enjoys travel, food and wine and adventures with her husband, Roger.
AAWMAG.COM | AUGUST 2016
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There is definitely power in the purse Annual fundraising celebration honors women of the High Country
Left: Robin Triplett, family services coordinator for the Children’s Council of Watauga County, received the inaugural Women Helping Women Award during the Power of the Purse luncheon. Middle: Approximately 270 community enthusiasts, the majority of which were women, attended the annual Power of the Purse fundraising event that honors and celebrates a continued commitment to serving the needs of impoverished, disenfranchised women and girls in the High Country area. Right: Jenny Miller, at left, shares how the vast contributions of Kathleen Kennedy-Olsen, pictured right, has made a tremendous impact on the lives of many women and children in the High Country area and beyond. Photos by Sherrie Norris
The Clubhouse at Elk River provided the perfect backdrop for the June 22 Power of the Purse annual fundraising event of the Women’s Fund of the Blue Ridge. “Our mission is to create positive change and economic justice for women and girls in the counties we serve,” said Karen Sabo, executive director of the organization, to those gathered. “Through funding to local nonprofit agencies, we aim to be a philanthropic catalyst for all women and girls to have access to the resources they need as they strive to become empowered and reach their full potential.” Robin Triplett, family services coordinator for the Children’s Council of Watauga County, received the inaugural Women Helping Women Award, presented by Karen Sabo. An educator for 22 years with a background in social work and early childhood development, Robin has a passion for working with parents and interacting with families in our community, said the organization’s executive director, Crystal Kelly. “Robin has worked for the Children’s Council of Watauga County for over 10 years serving families with young children as a home visitor, parent educator, teen advocate, doula, program coordinator and
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many other roles,” says Crystal. “She goes above and beyond every single day and always looks for the best in everyone she meets. She connects with mothers and believes in them, providing them mothering and nurturing that has been missing in their life. She connects them to resources and provides a listening ear. We have countless stories of individual’s lives she has touched over the years. Many keep in touch and continue to visit as their children get older and they get more comfortable being parents. Robin has a gift with people and her light shines bright.” Brandi Clark, a rising senior at LeesMcRae College, shared with the attendees how her life was changed through the New Opportunity School for Women, and how the educational opportunity that followed at Lees-McRae College is helping her to realize a lifelong dream of becoming a veterinarian. (See sidebar). NOSW is one of many grant recipients supported by the WFBR. Other highlights of the event included an in-house pledge drive netting more than $100,000 — to be collected during a five-year period — inspired by Jenny Miller’s announcement that Kathleen Kennedy-Olsen had generously donated $25,000 to kick off the “Infinity Fund,” which will “feed the long-term stability of
the women’s fund,” said Karen Sabo. “We are so grateful that so many who are supporting the Infinity Fund,” Karen said after the event. “We all know that how we spend money is a reflection of our values. And a lot of women proved that day that they value helping other women and lifting them up, and voting to do so in a long-term way. We are hoping that women will consider leaving a gift to the Infinity Fund in their will; helping women far into the future is a wonderful way to continue to make an impact for our daughters and granddaughters.” Additionally, former WFBR board member Cathy Williamson announced the acquisition of another gift to WFBR, made by Betty Cox in memory of her recently deceased husband, Michael Cox. “This significant donation, announced today on Michael’s birthday, brings the Coxes’ support of local nonprofit organizations to well over $300,000,” Cathy said. She encouraged those in attendance to follow the Cox family’s lead by “being faithful” to the Women’s Fund and giving to make a difference in the lives of others. The 100 Men Campaign was also introduced as the “brainchild” of member Faye Cooper, who, Karen says, “thought we could provide local men a way to demonstrate that they’re allies to women and
girls.” The 100 men who were asked to donate $100 each responded quickly, Karen says, dedicating their donation to special women in their lives. Grants Committee Co-Chair Christina Howe spoke about her experiences visiting some of the agencies the organization supports, including local women’s shelters, programs for young girls and more, many of which were represented at the luncheon. This year’s silent auction featured original art, gift baskets, dining certificates and lodging packages donated by numerous individuals and businesses. Entertainment for the event was provided by musician Carol Rinn. “We want to thank all of our guests, sponsors, donors and friends for helping to make this year’s Power of the Purse luncheon a great success,” says Karen. “We raised more than $143,000 at the luncheon, the majority of which, after expenses, will go into the pool for our grant making to local nonprofits. Helping them help women is our mission.” Karen refers to the annual fundraiser as “a really big philanthropy party,” calling the energy in the room “just amazing.”
Brandi Clark, a rising senior at Lees-McRae College, shared with the packed house at the Elk River Club how her life was changed through the New Opportunity School for Women.
Representing New Opportunity School for Women at Lees-McRae College, one of the many grant recipients of WFBR, Brandi Clark shared how her life has been impacted through the fund’s generosity. Currently at student at LMC studying wildlife rehabilitation with plans to
Women have long been organizing and making an impact on the world through volunteerism, Karen emphasizes, but until the past few decades, when we’ve been philanthropic we’ve been giving other people’s money.” For better or for worse, Karen continues, “in our society money equals power. And historically, power for women has so often been tied to their appearance, or to money earned by the men in their lives. So, for all those women to be in the room together — pooling money — means that women are finally getting more power in society because of their own work, their own earnings and their own savings.” For all those (mostly) women to be there together, giving money to create a safety net for women in our area who don’t have a safety net of money, Karen adds, “is a really impressive and moving event, that actually has social and historical significance.“ Topping the list of event sponsors include Bonnie and Jamie Schaefer of Westglow Resort & Spa, The Kathleen Kennedy-Olsen Fund of the Ethel and W. George Kennedy Family Foundation, Inc., Albert Jay Martin Foundation, Mast General Store and Sharp Business Systems.
pursue a career as a veterinarian, Brandi expressed thanks for the financial support that helped her create a better life for herself and other young women. It was Brandi’s goal, she said, to help others understand the importance of the Women’s Fund in the High Country. While staying with her grandmother, a seasonal resident of Sugar Mountain, Brandi learned of NOSW through a neighbor. “All I needed was one chance to change my life,” she said. At age 25, in the summer of 2013, Brandi got the chance. A native of Tampa, Fla., Brandi was 11 when her mother passed away; she was raised by her father until coming to live with her grandmother at 24. “Working at fast food restaurants, I began questioning my life. I had always wanted to attend college and become something worth while — someone who made a difference, but I could never afford it,” she said. Through NOSW, Brandi began to realize that her dreams for an education
More about WFBR The Women’s Fund of the Blue Ridge is the result of a successful merge that occurred in March 2014, uniting Appalachian Women’s Fund and the High Country Women’s Fund. The mission of the WFBR is to create positive change and economic justice for women and girls in the counties it serves. In its first two years, WFBR has made great strides in improving the lives of many women and their families in the High Country area and beyond. To contribute to the work of the fund, mail donations to Women’s Fund of the Blue Ridge, Inc., P. O. Box 1838 Boone, N.C. 28607. For more information about WFBR, visit www.WomensFundOfTheBlueRidge. org or call Karen Sabo, executive director at (828) 264-4002.
sherrie norris Editor, All About Women
were possible, and that time away “to be able to focus,” would help. After NOSW, she enrolled as a student at LMC and will begin her senior year in August. “I discovered that I am capable of doing whatever my heart desires, and my heart desires to become a veterinarian,” she said. Previously, Brandi added, she always felt defeated and never believed she could be successful. “Today I know that I am capable and smart enough to achieve my dreams — with the help of organizations like the NOSW and HCWF.” Brandi once thought the world was a bad place, she said. “But today I understand that this is not always true. Because of the many people that shared their grace with me, I will now and always spread love and kindness to anyone I cross paths with. I believe that love is something you can give away for free — and I will always give away what was so freely given to me.”
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Mary Helen Cole going strong and full of life Age has done little to slow the pace for Mary Helen Cole who still gardens and drives her blue minivan around town. Photos by Sherrie Norris
Nearing her 97th birthday, Mary Helen Cole enjoys rocking on her front porch — but only if she doesn’t have a church function to attend or an outing she doesn’t want to miss. A lively senior with a keen mind and a delightful sense of humor, Mary Helen has been a fixture in Boone since she was in the sixth grade, just after the Great Depression, when her family moved here from Collettsville. “My dad owned a general store there, but lost everything in the Depression,” she says. “He moved us to Boone so his children could get a college education.” Mary Helen was much younger when she developed an interest in music, especially the piano and shape note singing, she recalls. “My daddy led the singing in the Baptist church, and I was there on the front row taking it all in. By age 5, I was also playing piano.” Graduating from Boone High School in 1936, Mary Helen was the only one of her family to finish college, earning her teaching certificate at Appalachian State Teacher’s College. “I was ready to start my junior year when I asked my daddy not to make me go back to school, that I didn’t want to be a teacher,” she says. “He told me that
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he wanted his children to have a chance that he didn’t have, that he had the money in the bank and that when I finished, he would buy me a car.” The next week, he got sick and died. “At that time I wouldn’t have quit school for anything. I did not want to disappoint him,” she says. Upon moving to Boone, the family lived in a rental home in front of Grace Lutheran Church and joined the Baptist church nearby. “Boone wasn’t like it is today,” she says. “There were two or three doctors at that time, but no hospital.” Before her father’s death, he had built his family a home in the Perkinsville area. “In the beginning, I rode to college with a neighbor whose brother drove us every morning, but we had to walk back in the afternoon.” At the time of his death, her father owned a pickup truck and a car. “I was the only one in the family who learned to drive, so I started driving myself to school.” After classes, at night and on the weekends, Mary Helen worked in the Appalachian Soda Shop, where Appalachian Theatre is today. “It was just one of four places in Boone where you could get
A young-at-heart Mary Helen Cole enjoys life to its fullest in anticipation of her upcoming 97th birthday on Aug. 20.
a fountain drink and an ice cream cone — and the only one open at night for the college students,” she remembers. Mary Helen had been “timid” up to that point, she says. “But I learned to flirt at the soda shop.” The year 1940 is forever etched in her mind. “Not only was that the summer I graduated from college and turned 21,” she says, “but it was when the historic flood claimed lives and caused a lot of destruction in Watauga County.” At the time, Watauga County didn’t have enough schools for all the new teachers graduating from college. “I wasn’t hired to teach, but Mr. Yount who owned the soda shop offered me $10 a week to keep working there,” she says. “I was honored. In those days, you could buy a hot dog for a nickel and a hamburger for a dime.” Following the first week of school, one of her college mates who had gotten a teaching job came to her in tears. “She said she just couldn’t do it, and asked me to take her place. She was real smart and would’ve been a good teacher, but she had made up her mind. She had already been to see Mr. Walker, the superintendent, and recommended me for her replacement.”
On Sunday night, “about 9 o’clock,” Mary Helen says, Walker was at her door, contract in hand, requesting her to start teaching in Foscoe the next morning. “I didn’t even know where Foscoe was — or how to get there,” she says. “But he had already talked to another teacher who would pick me up. Teachers made $96 a month in 1940, so I was happy.” The flood had devastated Foscoe, and the roads were horrible, she recalls. “It had washed the soil from under the Tweetsie tracks — they were just hanging, but we still made it to school.” Mary Helen taught 17 students in the two-teacher school, she says, “until they done away with it and sent the kids to Valle Crucis.” She taught at Blowing Rock “until Pearl Harbor happened,” she says. “After that, I quit teaching, and with two other girls, rode a Greyhound bus to Maryland. I got a job as timekeeper for about 150 employees at the Army Proving Grounds base — way before computers, and I wrote everything out by hand.” While there, she met Harold Cole, a soldier and coworker, who she married in 1943 after a six-week courtship. The couple stayed in Maryland for three years, during which their first child, named for his father, was born. “When little Harold was a few months old, my husband was sent to Texas,” she says. “My mother came to help me with the baby.” Mary Helen joined a drama club, which once performed at the White House in Washington, D.C. for 500 people. As lead actress in a particular play, she was still wearing heavy make-up when she went home one night to discover that Harold had arrived to take her and the baby back to Texas with him. They packed their belongings into their ’38 Chevrolet and brought her mother to Boone before heading to Camp Bouie in Texas. Even with a 6-month-old baby, no money or a place to stay, Mary Helen says, “We didn’t worry much about it.” They discovered a garage apartment whose owner was hesitant to rent to a family with children “because it was too easy to get attached, she had said.” However, once she saw the baby, she welcomed them in.
“All we had was one cooker and some silverware. Thank goodness the apartment was furnished,” Mary Helen adds. “Harold made $80 a month, and $40 of that went for rent.” Six months later, Harold was “shipped out,” so Mary Helen and the baby returned to live with her mother in Boone. Soon after Harold came home, the couple learned they were expecting their second child. Johnny was born 15 months after his brother. Another little boy, Danny, came along soon, but, Mary Helen says, she had to wait 10 years for her little girl, Helen Dolores, and three years later, Mary Doris. “We had five children and gave them all a ‘D’ middle name after my daddy. I do everything with a purpose.” A proud descendent of Daniel Boone, Mary Helen emphasized “the importance of family tradition.” “In those early days, there was no industry here, so it was hard for Harold to find work. He did whatever he could find to do, and we made it the best we could. It was a real blessing that Mama had a big house with no one there but her.” Mary Helen returned to the classroom, first as a substitute — “anytime, anywhere a teacher was needed,” she says, before going fulltime. As their family grew and the economy improved, the Coles bought land and built a house. One of her former students, Betty Jo Norris, came to help take care of the children — “the best babysitter I ever had who did anything else that needed to be done,” she remembers. Mary Helen said she tried to quit teaching four times, but her resignation was never accepted. “After a 30-year career in education, at 56, I finished at Elkland School at Todd,” she says. “The next week, Harold and I went to Florida and stayed for 15 winters. We came home for Christmas, but stayed there at least five months each year.” Those were glorious years, she says. “We didn’t have a care in the world.” Harold later developed emphysema, which, she said, was attributed to his smoking and lead paint he used in painting houses. He also hung wallpaper. “When he became disabled, we came home to stay,” she says. “I took good care of him as his condition deteriorated, over
a three-year period. When you love somebody — and they are good to you — you will do everything you can for them.” On her husband’s deathbed, Mary Helen remembers Harold telling their pastor, Harold Bennett, how good she had been to him, and how proud he was of their children. “He was such a good man, and was 77 when he died in 1997.” Mary Helen has many fond memories of their time together, including that of a cross-country trip on Amtrak and two trips to the Bahamas. A charter member of Greenway Baptist Church, Cole has always been involved in church functions, especially anything music-related. “But I’ve always done everything they’ve asked me to do,” she says, which included playing the piano recently on Mother’s Day. “I’m the oldest person still left there,” she says. “Everyone else has either gone to a nursing home or died.” Mary Helen especially enjoys time with her family. “We all get together on holidays and in August when we celebrate eight of our birthdays.” “I’ve got five of the most wonderful children in the world and they have blessed me with seven grandchildren, eight great-grandchildren and three great-great-grandchildren.” She loves to cook and wash dishes, but adds, “My dishes — not anybody else’s!” Earlier in life, she had little time for hobbies, but learned to quilt and make knotted bedspreads while in Florida. She also learned to embroider and is known for her initialed pillowcase sets she often gives as gifts. She collects spoons and teacups, still gardens and loves flowers. She still drives, “but not outside of Boone,” she stresses. Mary Helen attributes strong family genes and good living to her longevity. “I had a sister to die at 103,” she says. “I hope to live that long if I feel as good as I do now. Dr. Harter does a good job at keeping me well.”
sherrie norris Editor, All About Women
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LivingWell
EAT YOUR GRASS Ah, grass-mowing season. That noisy and relentless task must be faithfully performed to ensure a lush and beautiful lawn. But, grass is more than just a lovely ground cover. It is also a nutritional powerhouse. No, not the fescue used on your lawn, but edible grasses, such as wheatgrass. It has been known for some time that individuals eating a plant-based diet tend to have fewer cases of cancer. It is believed that the micronutrients found in plants form the basis of this effect. It turns out that wheatgrass is the ultimate plant. A study published in the Turkish Journal of Medicine suggests that wheatgrass extract could help slow the growth of leukemia cells and
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induce their death by a process called programmed cell death (apoptosis). One possible reason for this is that wheatgrass is rich in chlorophyll. “Chlorophyll has the ability to bind with toxins, metals and other substances that may stimulate cancer cells to grow,” reports the Linus Pauling Institute. In addition to chlorophyll, wheatgrass contains all minerals known to man, plus vitamins A, B-complex, C, E, K and superoxide dismutase, a powerful antioxidant. It contains 17 amino acids, the building blocks of protein. This “stew” of potent nutrients can help fight inflammations and bacterial infections. Wheatgrass also contains cholesterol-lowering saponins and digestion-improving enzymes.
‘‘
It turns out that wheatgrass is the ultimate plant.
Staunch advocates of this nutritionallydense grass claim higher energy and mental acuity, as well as a stronger immune system. Wheatgrass is notably rich in magnesium. So rich, in fact, that dairy farmers put their herds on wheatgrass to stimulate fertility. The high magnesium content has been shown to build the enzymes that restore sex hormones. Magnesium also supports healthy humans by protecting the heart, building the bones and helping to ward off diabetes. Many health food stores sell wheatgrass, but you can also easily grow a small crop on your kitchen counter. It is as simple as soaking and sprouting wheat berries overnight and planting them in
soil. You can add your crop to salads and juices. Instructions can be easily found on the Internet.
KEEP IN MIND: Those who are allergic to grass might also be allergic to wheatgrass. It is important to check with your health professional if you are being treated for a medical condition before making any dietary changes.
bonnie church Certified Life and Wellness Coach Author/columnist, motivational speaker Certified Trainer for TLS Weight Loss Solution
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Residents, staff and volunteers at Kari’s Home for Women frequently gather at the “prayer rock” for a time of prayer and reflection.
A Christ-centered restoration A local couple’s desire to help women find freedom from addiction through providing a Christ-centered place of restoration became reality May 17, 2015 when Kari’s Home for Women opened and the first residential student walked in, ready for a life-changing experience. From that day forward, Kari’s Home has been instrumental in helping women struggling with substance abuse to overcome their addictions and find peace with God. Michelle Lundgren and her husband John are blessed, they say, for the opportunity to pursue the desire of John’s family to bring hope to others who have been entrapped by drug and alcohol addiction. Having met while serving on the board of Freedom Farm Ministries, a local drug and alcohol rehabilitation ministry for men, the couple learned that
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local women struggling with addictive behaviors had few choices for recovery in a residential setting. “Local agencies provide a woman with temporary shelter if she is in a domestic violence situation, or overnight accommodations if she is homeless,” says Michelle. “The local network of mental health providers provide her with counseling, for a fee, but they do not offer her a safe place to regroup and concentrate on her behavior and the causes of her compulsions and addictions.” The Lundgrens spent the summer of 2012 researching, visiting related organizations and recruiting others to come alongside them to lend professional expertise to meet the need for women. Within a short time, Kari’s Home for Women was born, incorporated and established as a nonprofit organization. A board of directors consisting of area pro-
fessionals was formed. The ministry has since been joined by faithful volunteers, advisors, supporters and a prayer team.
Meeting the need Women who desire to approach their recovery from a faith-based perspective are discovering hope at Kari’s Home, says Nancy, who recently graduated from the six-month program, but desires to stay longer to better prepare for what she knows could be a difficult time of transition. The 48-year-old mother and grandmother started drinking at age 12, to “cope with all that was going on,” she says, which included alcoholic parents. She graduated high school and was married soon afterward. She experienced sobriety for a few years, but after her mother’s death and through two failed
marriages, she continued using alcohol and drugs. “I knew who God was and believed that he existed, but I had no relationship with him. I would go to church, but come home and drink.” Her substance abuse led to prostitution, jail time, severe depression, health problems and numerous rehab placements. When she decided she had “had enough,” Nancy explains, she applied to other rehabs, but was rejected — until Kari’s Home accepted her. “Since being here, I got saved and was baptized. Earlier this year, Pastor Charlie Martin (Bethel Baptist Church) told me it is important to always remember to ‘Start where you are, use what you have and do what you can.’ My life has forever been changed by coming to Kari’s Home. I can’t thank them enough for what they have done for me. God took care of me through it all and brought me here.” Robin is also a 48-year-old mother and grandmother. “I definitely feel like God put me here,” she says. “It’s different than anything I’ve done and anywhere I’ve ever been. I used to be so fearful, but I’ve learned to trust God more. I can spend more time with him here and get to know him better.” The two newest residents, April and Morgan, both agree that Kari’s Home “feels like family,” and is a place they love and where they have “learned so much.” As a Christian, faith-based ministry — and not a rehabilitation program — Kari’s Home focuses on helping women recover through the empowerment of a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. It is the purpose and mission of Kari’s Home, says Michelle, to provide a setting where women can heal in a Christ-centered environment, experience female mentorship, participate in focused Bible study and in structured community involvement as they learn to live life soberly and productively. “The intent, she adds, “is to prepare these women to return to society with new coping skills and with the ability to care for themselves through the life preparation skills we offer.”
Programming “We welcome those who do not profess to be a Christian,” Michelle says, “but they are expected to participate in the Bible studies and follow rules and
regulations.” The daily routine includes both personal and corporate times of Bible study and worship, as well as a personal time of discovery and healing. The women are assisted in their studies by staff and volunteers from local faith-based groups, churches and related organizations; oneon-one counseling is provided by trained psychological and pastoral counselors. The residents attend Bethel Baptist Church, where, they say, they have been welcomed with open arms, no judgment or condemnation — something, they all agree, that they need. “Pastor Charlie comes to visit every time a new resident comes in,” Michelle says. “It is really nice to know that, as a pastor, he is such a genuine soul and really cares.” Church members, such as Debbie Isaacs, have taken an active role in the lives of the women, too, helping with both their personal and spiritual needs. Men from the church volunteer, as well, to help with home and property maintenance. “God is so good to place these people in our lives,” Michelle says. To help subsidize operating costs, the residents participate in daily chores. They recently planted the home’s first garden, from which they help nurture, harvest and preserve the goods throughout the summer. Female volunteers are welcomed and appreciated as role models to help teach life skills classes such as cooking, sewing, budgeting, exercise, time management and parenting. Originally planned to be located on the family farm a few miles away, Kari’s Home is, instead, situated on a 20-acre parcel of land that was donated to the ministry. Grateful for the gift, “an answer to prayer,” Michelle describes, “It offers a serene environment, the ideal place for women to intentionally focus on the issues that are fueling addictive behaviors.”
Supporting Kari’s Home for Women A donor supported non-profit organization, Kari’s Home has a fee structure set up for the women, most of who have a sponsoring family member or church, but, Michelle adds, a number of applicants are without financial resources. Fundraising has become necessary
as even the program fee covers only a small portion of the cost to operate the ministry and to maintain the facilities and grounds. Up to this point, however, God has supplied needs as they arise, Michelle says. “We are so blessed to have such a loving, caring and generous community to stand by us and support us. It is amazing to see how it has all come about.” Kari’s Home for Women is named in memory of Kari Lundgren, John Lundgren’s oldest sibling who died at age 18. Currently, the ministry operates from a used double-wide mobile home which accommodates four women and a house manager. Other buildings on the property are currently being renovated to house additional participants as funds allow. “We are working on two more homes right now that will allow us to serve more women,” says Michelle. For more information regarding application/qualifications for admission, volunteering or sponsoring a resident, find Kari’s Home on Facebook, visit www. karishome.org., or call (828) 297-3030. Tax-deductible donations maybe made payable to Kari’s Home for Women, Inc. and mailed to P.O. Box 284 Vilas, N.C. 28692. sherrie norris Editor, All About Women
An annual fundraising banquet to help Kari’s Home continue to assist in transforming women’s lives will be held September 8 at Alliance Bible Fellowship. The event will include a silent auction beginning at 5:30 p.m. with dinner at 6:30 p.m., catered by Green Street Catering.
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marriageandFamilyCorner
Insidious Choices: Consider your patterns “Hey, watch this!” Most of us know that term is often an indication that a risky behavior is about to occur. Similarly, “I will just” frequently begins a sentence that minimizes or fails to recognize potential risk. I have noticed that this phrase is intertwined with numerous behavioral and emotional concerns that bring people into psychotherapy. This pattern is so common that the substance abuse treatment field refers to it as “seemingly irrelevant (or insignificant) decisions,” or SIDs. SIDs has been described as choices that seem routine and appear to be unrelated to recovery or relapse (Marlatt and Gordon 1985). Likewise, this sort of pattern is part of the maintaining of many other chronic problems, such as poor eating habits, disordered eating or an eating disorder. SIDs tend to progress gradually, like the proverbially “slippery slope.” So, the initially benign decision progressively becomes part of the problem. For example, celebrating a birthday by having a piece of cake can be part of a healthy and 24
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happy life. Having one bite-sized chocolate for comfort can be a healthy choice. Other comfort options might include taking a short (or long) walk, calling a friend or taking a bath. However, celebrating and rewarding one’s self or one’s child with indulgent treats or portions is dangerous when used too often — or when other healthy options aren’t used. Other examples of potentially “insidious” choices about eating include poor nutrition choices made because of feeling overwhelmed with being too busy, giving in to demands of children, poor planning and poor stress management. A big part of why these decisions are so dangerous is that they often seem not to be decisions at all to the person making them. “I just have to have one more latte/candy/soda to get going (or to make it through the day or to handle this stress)” or, “I have to have fast food because it is faster.” It is likely that a majority of Americans say or think some version of these sentences once in a while. Often, these statements are followed or preceded by
statements like “I know I should(n’t), but…” Distinguishing if the person is, in fact, able to make a choice not to eat something — or to eat only a certain amount — helps to determine if the person has an eating disorder, disordered eating or “just” a problem related to lifestyle. If these choices are part of “lifestyle” decisions, the best way to improve related health is to understand options, and then make healthier choices. However, if the person is unable to make these changes, professional evaluation and, perhaps, treatment is necessary. When the problem is an inability or failure to recognize the impact of choices, education may be effective. If education doesn’t allow the person to make decisions based on adequate choices, professional evaluation and treatment, perhaps, is necessary. These distinctions — and any indicated help — allow a person to have true freedom in examining options and making choices. Changing eating patterns can be more successful when this sort of think-
ing is applied. Marlatt also proposed steps for relapse prevention. Many of these steps are also useful in altering problematic eating patterns. Choices to maintain connection to “people, places and things” from times of active addiction is risky. Similarly, if a person feels unable to make eating pattern changes, it may be useful to examine the triggers for overeating, or eating poorly, and to develop plans that may include changes related to the people, places and things (e.g., functions) connected to problematic eating. Again, a psychotherapist can help with these evaluations and plans. Depending on the degree of the problem, a nutritionist and physician may also be needed in treatment. All of these options start with an examination of problematic eating patterns and related thoughts. If your physical or mental health would benefit from losing weight, eating more nutritious foods and less non-nutritious, or minimally nutritious food, ask yourself these questions over a few weeks: 1. Do you know that your physical and mental health would be better if you made different choices regarding food portions and types, but you feel unable to make those different choices? These beliefs may be indicated by words such as “have to” or “can’t.” 2. Do you have a pattern of making statements (out loud or to yourself) like, “just this one time?” These are two of the patterns that might indicate you are making SIDs that are actually significantly damaging your physical and mental health. If you said yes to one or both of them, it is helpful to do a month-long experiment of purposefully and actively challenging these thoughts and related behaviors. If you find that you are not making progress in changing these thoughts and behaviors, consider scheduling with a psychotherapist for an assessment of these patterns and to discuss options.
coming in September AAW
INTRODUCING TO THE HIGH COUNTRY: THERMI MICRO-INVASIVE SKIN TIGHTENING AND FAT DISSOLVING TECHNOLOGY.
THERMITIGHT, THERMISMOOTH & THERMIVA
Before
Dr. Anagnos can discuss the options and possibilities with you.
After
For more information on available services or to discuss information in this column, contact:
MARY MCKINNEY, MA, LMFT McKinney Marriage and Family Therapy Clinical Fellow of American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy Approved Supervisor, AAMFT Calls and texts: 828-773-5463 www.mckinneymft.com mary@mckinneymft.com
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Peggy Eller
ey An amazing journ
“I’m so humbled,” is one phrase that Peggy Eller has spoken many times recently, referring to the way the community has responded to her retirement after 36 years as director of Appalachian State’s Child Development Center. “I’ve been blessed to do what I love,” Peggy says, as she reflects upon her career, which ended June 30. Peggy plans to spend more time with her family, become a better gardener and get organized at home, in addition to continuing her “road adventures” with her husband Joedy on “Earl,” their Harley-Davidson motorcycle. She also looks forward to more time outdoors — swimming, walking and riding her bicycle at the beach. She also hopes to take mission trips and help with disaster relief. “I’ve been blessed with great health and a desire to impact children’s lives, as well as adults,” Peggy says. “I’d love to give more of myself — physically, emotionally and spiritually to those experiencing tough
times. I’m excited to see the next door God opens for me.” While settling into her “new normal,” Peggy is missing the daily hugs and all the fun she had interacting with the children and their families at the center. “I’m also going to miss my staff — my girls, as I called them, and the university students. I love them as much as I love the children. My prayer is that they know I’m always available to them.”
From the beginning The youngest of three children — and the only girl — Peggy was “a shock, but also a gift” to her family, she’s been told. Both parents were 41 when she was born; her oldest brother, Bob, was serving in the Navy in Korea at the time, and her younger brother, Joe, was 11. Raised in Detroit, Peggy moved with her family to Rochester (Mich.) in 1969. She graduated from Rochester Adams
High School in 1972 and spent two years at Michigan State, pursuing a degree in business education, before transferring to Appalachian. Putting herself through college was no easy task, she says, but she was thankful for a work-study program “and money I made from waitressing” that supplemented her college earnings. In 1977, she received her degree in health, physical education and recreation, with a minor in business. As a freshman at App in 1975, Peggy observed the student demand for on-campus childcare, resulting in the creation of the child development center by Barbara Daye, ASU dean of students at the time, and managed by graduate students. Upon graduation n December 1977, Peggy was unable to land a teaching job in her field, so she accepted a job as a receptionist at a local orthodontist office where she later became a chair side assistant. Her coworker, Vanessa Minton, became her friend, “as close as a sister,” she says, Continued on page 28
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Among the treasured gifts she received upon her retirement is this bench, lovingly decorated by children and their families at the Child Development Center on the App State campus. Photo by Sherrie Norris
Peggy Eller, surrounded by her family, as they celebrate her retirement as director of the Child Development Center at Appalachian State University. Photo submitted
who called her every Sunday morning to invite her church. Eventually, Peggy accepted her invitation in 1979. “She was there when I made a life-changing decision and surrendered my soul to the Lord.” In 1978, Peggy returned to work at ASU, first in the driver education department before transferring as secretary to the department where she earned her degree. A year later, she married Joedy Eller; the next year, they welcomed into the world their first son, Josh. At about the same time, Peggy’s friend, Ellen Thomas Bevington, an instructor in her department, had a baby girl and needed a caregiver. Peggy accepted the role, while also teaching infant swim classes at the Watauga Parks and Recreation pool. Sandy Kadyk, whose daughter Molly was one of her students, became a great encourager to Peggy, telling her that she was so good with children, that she should open a childcare center. If she did, Sandy promised to enroll Molly. In the meantime, the Ellers’ second son, Daniel, was born, Dec. 1981, Peggy again returned to work part-time at ASU in the political science/criminal justice department, supervised by great mentors, Mona Brandon and Joel Thompson It was a book, “The Giving Tree,” a gift from Mona, after which Peggy named the childcare center she eventually opened. “Yes, Sandy did enroll Molly, who was in the first graduating class from the Giving Tree,” Peggy says. “Molly is now employed at Appalachian State in the office of student development, and has worked with me as business officer for the center.” From 1982 to 1988, Peggy was in a part-
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nership with Elaine Denton, while at the same time taking early childhood education classes through Caldwell Community College. In August 1988, Peggy was encouraged to apply for the director’s position at the ASU Child Development Center, located on Rivers Street with an enrollment of 15 children. When that site was designated for the John E. Thomas Building, the university foundation purchased 10 acres of land on Poplar Grove Road, where the current location was built. Under Peggy’s leadership, enrollment at the center has increased four times to its a current capacity of 68 children, including infants and toddlers. Five permanent lead teachers are currently employed, with 70-80 college students serving as aides to the teachers, she says, describing the latter as “paid workers, not necessarily majoring in a child-related field, but getting great practical life experience.” Because most of the families, both students and faculty-staff, do not have relatives in this area, they become a great support and encouragement to each other, Peggy says. “For many families, the center has been the most consistent thing in their child’s early life.” In 2002, Peggy was offered the position of children’s director at her church, a decision with which she “truly struggled,” she says. “I could not be at peace in my heart about leaving the university. I was very honored to be offered that position, but after much prayer and careful consideration, I declined and chose to remain at ASU.” One of her most challenging experi-
ences on campus a few years later, Peggy says, resulted from her sharing her personal faith, after which she was advised to be “very careful” when and where she did so. “I was discouraged, but I received some advice from a wise young man who told me, ‘Mom, allow Jesus to live through you. Actions speak louder than words and people will know the love you have for the Lord by how you act and what you do, not by what you say.’” Taking that advice, Peggy says. “God has been faithful to protect me, yet live through me, all this time.” Peggy has had countless experiences through the years that are forever etched in her heart and mind, she admits. “From helping parents through leaving their child for the first time, to helping children with new siblings learn to love, share and grow in an environment other than home,” she says. “I’ve also helped young parents through unplanned pregnancies — and their choices to choose life and be supported in this decision — or not to choose life and regret deeply their decision, and then needing to find peace and to forgive themselves.” She’s shared grief with families in the loss of a child, a parent and a grandparent — and then helped them to move forward. She has also supported working families and those that are trying to rise up to a higher level of education and become vibrant citizens — “and the list goes on,” she says. Peggy adds, “I truly hope that through all their experiences, people know they were loved, supported and prayed for.” The center helped Peggy build solid
and lasting relationships within the Appalachian community, she says. “My husband already had strong ties to this area, where he has lived and worked for more than 57 years, so together, we have formed many special friendships along the way.” Joedy’s support, faith, love and encouragement — as well as that of her sons, Josh, Daniel and Michael — has been vital to her success, Peggy says, “Our boys attended public school in Watauga County and also graduated from Appalachian, as did two of our daughter-in laws, which has strengthened our family ties with Boone and App State.”
Peggy Eller says she will miss the hugs and special times spent with the children and staff she has come to know and love at the ASU Child Development Center. Photo by Sherrie Norris
“This is a great honor and allows me and the giver to continue to reach out and help others even after my retirement,” Peggy adds. “Anyone who might consider contributing can be assured that their gift will create a life-long appreciation from the recipients. It would also be a great honor to see this scholarship continue to grow through the years.” Peggy thinks of those struggling parents she’s met through the years, some desperate and determined to finish their education who had to put their childcare payment on a credit card. “The financial assistance parents receive through the scholarships will help them finish their education with dignity.” Not only will Peggy be remembered through the fund, but also through a tree planted in her honor on the center grounds. “It’s been an amazing journey. I’m excited to see what the Lord has in store for me in the future.” For more information about the Peggy Eller Endowment Scholarship, contact the Appalachian State University Advancement: Office of Donor Scholarship or contact Molly Kadyk-Bruch, Office of Student Development. To learn more about child development center, visit www.childdevelopment. appstate.edu. sherrie norris Editor, All About Women
About her staff, Peggy says, “I can’t say enough about them. We have been doing life together for many years. As lead teachers, Wanda Coles, Paula Hicks, Karen Church, Brenda Bodenhamer, Frankie Musser and Robin Hawkins are still as passionate about nurturing and caring for children and their families as they were from their first day. The bond we have is unshakable.” She adds, “They’ve not only created a lifelong experience for these children, but because of their dedication and love for each child, you can feel and see results. These women deserve respect and they work really hard and truly care about all families.” Early childhood educators give of themselves, physically and emotionally, Peggy says. “It is a very serious responsibility that we have taken just as seriously.” Barbara Daye has created the Peggy Eller Endowment Scholarship, a fund that will be used to support childcare needs of Appalachian families (student or staff ) who may be in a financial crisis.
What people are saying about Peggy Eller: “Director of the Child Development Center is just one of Peggy’s many titles. She has also been my mentor, friend, role model and sister. She is the definition of a selfless servant, and she has served God, the children, families and lead teachers with an amazing and vibrant soul over the course of her life here. Peggy has led by example and displayed to me the true meaning of passion. A simple paragraph could never fully articulate the impression she has had on my life, but, I can assure her that her presence and impact at the CDC will never disappear — we will continue to love as she has loved us, we will serve as she has served and we will take from her everything that she has taught us. I owe my entire career to Peggy. A simple thank you is not enough, but I am grateful for Peggy and I love her.” — Paula Hicks, coworker for 25 years. “Having Peggy as a friend is a gift you give yourself. She is so much to so many, but has the genuine ability to make you feel special! She is beautiful inside and out. I could fill pages of the wonderful times she has made me feel special.” — Mary Ruble “Peggy Eller has such a caring and loving heart. She is always looking for ways to brighten someone’s day.” — Kim Jones
Peggy Eller is pictured with her “girls,” Frankie Musser, Karen Church, Wanda Coles, Paula Hicks, Brenda Bodenhamer and Robin Hawkins, the lead teachers at the Appalachian State’s Child Development Center, with who she has shared a long-term “unshakable” bond. Photo by Sherrie Norris
“Peggy was my first friend in Boone over 30 years ago. She became my mentor in my Christian walk, as a future Watauga County School teacher, a wife and then as a mother. She has always known who she is as a Christian woman. Because of her God-given confidence in life, she has not only been a positive influence in my life, but in every life she has touched. Even though life has driven us physically apart, I feel a heartfelt connection with her. She is my unique, special friend for life.” — Sharon Rucker
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Fall Back into the
School Routine Going back to school may be a daunting time for children — they are no longer able to sleep in, play in the creek all day or have back porch picnics. While it is normal for your children not to be thrilled about attending school, there are ways to encourage and help them get ready for the new school year. Prior to the start of the school year, encourage your youngsters to start following their school schedules. Encourage them to start going to bed when they would need to for the school year, 30
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and wake up at the time needed to get to school on time. Offer them a special breakfast or adventure during the daytime if they will get up early in the morning. Get your children involved in buying school supplies. Allow them to look at the list given by the school and create their own list of supplies they need. Taking your children shopping with you is a great opportunity to spend time with them while, at the same time, helping them get excited about the upcoming
school year. To help children become enthusiastic about the school year, you need to show interest in what they do during the day — beyond what they learn in school. Kids may be more excited about going to school if they get involved in an activity such as a club or team. To gain understanding of what would be a best fit for them, talk with your children about what interests them. Finding the one activity that interests them could be all that’s needed to get them excited and
ready for school. If the school does not offer something they are interested in, look into club teams or local agencies that might be seeking volunteers. When the first day of school is finally here, plan something memorable to get your kids excited. Take the annual first day of school picture, cook their favorite breakfast or have a back-to- school fashion show.
Back-2School Festival INTRODUCING THE NEW
• Watauga County’s Back-2-School Festival will be held from 10 a.m.-2 p.m. on August 13 at Watauga High School. The Back-2-School Festival will include school supplies, thrift store gift cards, haircuts, community resources and food. Attending the Watauga County Back-2-School Festival is a great way to get children excited about the new school year and makes them feel confident and prepared. • During the first year of the Back-2School Festival, there were 500-plus children served with school supplies. In 2015, there were nearly 850. This year, more than 1,000 people are expected to attend. • Participating in this year’s Back-2School Festival is a great opportunity to have a positive impact on children, their families and teachers within our community. The festival assists local parents who are striving to make ends meet and cannot afford school supplies, as well as teachers who provide supplies to their children. Providing teachers the tools that they need is crucial in leading our children to succeed. • The Back-2-School Festival seeks to offer support to any and all Watauga County families who are struggling to afford the high cost of supplies, clothing and gear needed to attend school. Through streamlining local school readiness efforts, there is a greater direct impact on families and the schools. • The festival has four main goals: First, providing an environment for kids to get excited about the new school year. Secondly, to encourage students to think
of ways they can make a difference in our community, no matter who they are or how much money they have. Thirdly, it is a priority to see children start school with all the necessary items they need to feel confident, prepared and ready to succeed. Lastly, to help children realize their unlimited potential. • While there will be an abundance of back-to-school supplies at the festival, please be aware that there is no guarantee that your children will get everything on their supply lists. It is intended to supplement the costs of back-to-school shopping and relieve some of your burden. You may need to purchase additional items based on your child’s teacher. • However, if there are items on your child’s school supply list that are not available at the festival, and you cannot afford them, contact the administrative team for the Back-2-School Festival. Every effort will be made to obtain the items within the first week of school. • Preparing to go back to school can be a very busy time for families and their children. While it can be strenuous on parents, it is a great opportunity to engage with your children. Going school shopping with them, attending club/team meetings that they are interested in attending and going to Watauga County’s Back-2-School Festival are all great ways to get your children excited about the upcoming school year. We hope to see you at the festival and hope you have a great 2016-2017 school year.
Protein-Packed, Egg White Grill Breakfast Sandwich
828-264-4660 2082 Blowing Rock Rd • Boone, NC 28607 www.cfarestaurant.com/boone/home
A trusted name when you need that helping hand
828.963.8233 www.apphomecare.com AAWMAG.COM | AUGUST 2016
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Kristy Hackler, third from left, is pictured with Farm Camp volunteers Everet Smith and Carly Hodges, along with fellow staff member Emily Shack.
farm camp Growing Strong Kids
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It was the interlacing of her life experiences and knowledge that helped teacher Kristy Hackler of Boone coordinate the first farm camp at Mountain Pathways Montessori School, last summer. Growing up in Stanley, Kristy learned farming alongside her dad and grandfather. “They definitely treated me like a boy, which was adorable,” she says with a laugh. “They asked me to do crazy things, because they knew I could do them. It was a great upbringing.” Because of that upbringing, Kristy was drawn to learning about agriculture and, more specifically, horticulture, in which she majored at NC State University. Certainly, Kristy’s farming roots run deep, but when she moved to Italy for four years (for the Navy career of her husband at the time), the job she landed was one teaching at the local Montessori school. The Montessori philosophy was borne out of the work of Maria Montessori, Italy’s first female physician, who noted that kids thrive and develop a love of learning from doing, rather than being talked to. “Montessori is basically a way of teaching that demonstrates respect for the whole child and what children are capable of,” Kristy explains. “Students have a lot of freedom within certain parameters, while the teachers are guides who maintain rules while allowing the kids to determine how to do their work on their own and in their own way. We build up the whole child and treat them as if they are capable and accountable.” Now, as a certified Montessori teacher at Mountain Pathways, Kristy regularly looks for learning opportunities she can offer kids outside of her classroom. Knowing from her childhood that farming offers many essential lessons and values, Kristy decided she’d like to start a summer camp that would allow 9 to 12-yearold kids an opportunity to experience and learn the way she did. Partnerships with Appalachian Mountain Brewery and the Farm to Flame food truck, along with donations from local businesses, provided funding to get the camp going, but it was the hard work of Kristy’s students themselves that brought the camp to full fruition. “I couldn’t have done it without the help of my assistant Emily Shack, and we couldn’t have done this without the help of our students,” she explains. “I would
take them to Lowe’s Hardware in my 1986 Ford F350 named Brownie to get supplies, and they would unload truckloads of compost and manure. They were all about it! Now, we run the camp with the help of ASU interns totally volunteering their time. It’s amazing to me how giving the ASU students are. Not only do they show up on time, but they really enjoy their part in the camp.” The camp offers weeklong sessions every other week during the summer
ourselves to give kids their own senses of self. “The talk is really about how I can teach my kids to do things for themselves to give them confidence and respect for their abilities,” Kristy says. “To me, that’s done by teaching farming and gardening, because of the really tangible cycles of starting something and taking it all the way to the finish to see where it goes.” Besides the daily “farm chores” campers complete, there are weekly field trips to local farms, guest speakers who teach a
‘
[It] is really about how I can teach my kids to do things for themselves to give them confidence and respect for their abilities. To me, that’s done by teaching farming and gardening, because of the really tangible cycles of starting something and taking it all the way to the finish to see where it goes. - Kristy Hackler
with up to 12 kids at a time. “There are five sessions,” Kristy explains. “We break up into four groups: my group works in the garden transplanting plants from the greenhouse to the garden or watering plants. Another group makes and serves group snacks using ingredients from the garden with the rule that everyone has to at least taste the snack that is served. Then, there’s a harvesting and marketing group that delivers orders to customers, and cuts, cleans and bundles items to sell at the Farmers’ Market.” Finally, she adds, the greenhouse group tends to plants in the greenhouse. “We do succession planting, meaning we are constantly starting new seeds so we can rotate new plantings into the garden according to the season. This really maximizes our production.” Kristy’s Farm Camp model has garnered enough attention that this September she will speak in Tryon at TEDx Tryon, a local version of the international TED Talks series, about Farm Camp and the idea that adults need to challenge
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lesson or a skill — and time to swim in the creek behind the school, just for fun. “We would like to see where this experience takes our campers,” Kristy says. “We get some kids who don’t love the outdoor experience, but that’s OK. I’m hoping they learn a bit about sustainability, that hard work is a virtue that will always earn you respect — and that for anything to be sustainable you have to earn money. We work in the garden for one hour and 15 minutes and ask the kids to work as hard as they can to the best of their ability. We hope it will give them confidence, as well as plant a seed inside them for a strong work ethic.” For more information about Farm Camp, log onto www.mountainpathways. org or call (828) 262-5787.
Yozette ‘Yogi’ Collins Mom, television producer/writer, and obsessive internet researcher. Though her name suggests otherwise, she is not (yet) an actual yogi.
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high hcountryc courtesies
A Gift for the Future Planning for care and legacy As I hustled through the busyness of one day to yet another busier day, I rarely paused to consider the fragility of life. However, when a subtle, hip-breaking life-changing slip on an icy parking lot in January 2014 interrupted my ‘superwoman’ approach to life, I found myself reeling in the recognition that quantitatively more of my life lay behind me than before me. My super powers of invincibility — of always serving in the helper role, rather than the “helpee” role — suffered a nasty blow. A poorly mended broken hip, requiring a full hip replacement surgery 34
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within that same year, added to my feelings of mere mortality. As I prepared for the pending second surgery, and period of recuperation, I found myself pondering the wretched, torturous “what if” questions: “What if I don’t wake up? What if I am incapacitated? What would life be like for my son? For my family?” Those questions led me to ask, “What do I need to do — just in case?” Although we do not need to dwell on negative aspects of aging, illness or the inevitability of our dying, a small amount
of time spent organizing vital information in an accessible format is a gift that will surely benefit your loved ones — should you become incapacitated or suddenly pass away. Timely availability of your vital information not only provides for your immediate care, but also allows for the handling of your affairs according to your wishes. Datebooks, downloadable forms and planners specifically geared to this task offer simple outlines for recording information for your caregivers or heirs. Begin by gathering pertinent per-
sonal information that may be needed or helpful in dealing with insurance, medical, financial and government agencies. The following lists offers suggestions of data.
• Birth certificate, adoption certificate and location.
PERSONAL
• Power of attorney, living will, advanced directive documents in existence and locations.
• Full name, date and place of birth, current mailing address, email/ website address. • Location of house keys and post office box keys — and any combination codes to both. • Drivers’ license number. • Access codes for voice mail/additional password codes. • Location of personal and business address books. • Marital information concerning current and previous marriages (names, contact information, dates of marriages/divorces, alimony or child support details). • Children’s vital information (names, dates and locations of births, social security numbers, passports and contact information). • Parents’ information (names, dates and locations of births and contact information). • Military service identification, branch, rank, VA number, location of military service and record of discharge. • Emergency notification requests.
MEDICAL • Existing conditions, prescriptions and doses. • Blood type. • Allergies. • Names of doctors, dentists and caregivers with contact information. • Medical insurance company for all health-related policies, policy payment details and contact information for local agent and company. • Medicare/Medicaid details with any social or caseworker contacts.
LEGAL DOCUMENTS • Social security number and location of original card.
• Passport numbers and location. • Will with date, location, executor and attorney contact information.
• Legal guardianship documents.
INSURANCE POLICIES • Company and contact information for agent, amount, benefactor(s), location of policies for self, spouse and children, payment amount and due date for all insurance policies, including: • Life, disability, professional, liability and/or property insurance, mortgage, homeowners, renters and/or vehicle insurance.
FINANCIAL • Bank accounts: Names and addresses of banks, account numbers and types of accounts, location of checkbooks, savings account books and ATM cards, passwords for accounts, security box location and keys. • Investments – names of companies, types of accounts, account numbers and PIN(s); contact information for agents, beneficiaries and location of records for 401Ks, IRAs, CDs, stocks, bonds, annuities, pensions and mutual funds. • Financial advisor/planner name and title, company, address and phone number. • Credit cards owned with account numbers, payment information, PIN numbers, location of statements and information concerning any insurance coverage for account balances. • Business interests described with assets, debts and obligations documented, key contacts, passwords, outline of current projects, location of accounts and documents. • Real estate information about properties owned, location of deeds, mortgage information and insurance. • Income tax information including location of records for previous years, name
and address for preparer of taxes. • Vehicles listed with model, type, year, VIN and license plate numbers, insurance information, location of title, ownership details concerning liens, leases or outright ownership.
FINAL WISHES • Funeral arrangement details according to your preference for religious affiliation, location and type of service, special requests for clergy, music, readings and flowers. • Military honors due should be noted. • Obituary preferences for places of publication and information to be included. • Disposition of remains preferences, including: plans for cremation, burial or donation, funeral home, any prior arrangements for services, cemetery plot or pre-paid burial plan, prior arrangements for donating organs or body, clothing for burial and pall bearers with contact information. • Notification list of those to be contacted in case of incapacitation or death: relatives and friends, employers, employees, doctors, neighbors, attorneys, accountants/financial managers, banks/brokers, insurance companies and agents. By gathering important records and leaving instructions with our final wishes, we can ease the stress for our loved ones as they deal with our care or death. The process of reviewing our vital information is the perfect time to confirm that all our affairs are in order, and that our intended beneficiaries are indeed set as beneficiaries. Preparation for our care — and for our death — is a gift we may not see unwrapped, but one for which those left will be most grateful. Consider organizing such a gift for yourself and your loved ones this year.
Sharon Carlton Sharon Carlton, High Country Courtesies ©2016 Sharon Carlton writes and speaks on modern etiquette and life skill topics. She conducts High Country Courtesies dining etiquette and customer service workshops. Contact her at highcountrycourtesies@gmail.com
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Donna Gragg ‘Because nice matters’ Left: After 36 years of dedicated service — and statewide recognition for technological interventions — Donna Gragg recently retired as data manager from Parkway School. Far Left: Pictured with Donna Gragg, center, to celebrate her recent retirement after 36 years at Parkway School are four of the principals with whom she has worked. From left, Merle Todd, Billie Hicklin, Gary Childers and Stephanie Weeks (Parkway’s current principal). She also worked with former Parkway principals John Marsh and Joe Miller who are now both deceased.
A plaque given as a gift by a former student has helped define life for Donna Teague Gragg of Boone. “Because nice matters” are words that have carried weight in both her professional and personal life, and has helped her maintain perspective in numerous situations in her administrative job at Parkway School for the last 36 years. According to former school principal, Gary Childers, with whom she worked for 15 of those years, being nice was no challenge for Donna, but rather, just a natural part of who she is. “For 36 years, Donna was the heartbeat for Parkway School,” Childers said. “At her recent retirement party, we (principals) were reflecting upon the qualities she brought to the school. We all had different perspectives, but they were all glowing.” Donna has always had a deep love and affection for the school, and she’s been dedicated and committed to making the school the best it could be, Chiders says. “And, she always shared that with families new to the school. When a family registered a new student, who was most often a little nervous, Dona would put her arm around the child and tell them they were 36
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going to love this school, that when she was a little girl and went to school here, she loved it. We saw her do that many times.” Childers says Donna was the school’s “greatest advocate,” and was always a positive reflection of the good qualities of the school and community. “She always wanted everything to be perfect for the school, its teachers and students.” Donna’s dedication, hard work and support of Parkway, Childers says, are all woven into the school’s success. “Most people didn’t know how hard she worked, but she was always in early and left late.” “She was always the “go-to person” in the school system, he adds. “Whenever some new technology came along — Donna was the one who learned it first and helped get the bugs out before it went through the system. Because Donna is an extremely intelligent person — and so good at what she did — Parkway was often a pilot site for new programs across the state.” Donna was recognized numerous times statewide, for her efforts, he added.
A standout from the start Donna was the 100th baby born in the community clinic in Bakersville. Her father worked in road construction and moved his family to Maryland before he was killed in an accident. Donna, the oldest of four children, was 10 when her father died. “It was my very first day of fifth grade,” she recalls, “and a very traumatic time for my family.” Her mother, a Watauga County native, moved her children back to the area. Donna first enrolled at Blowing Rock School before going to Parkway. She met Gary Gragg at Parkway, but they didn’t date until after graduating high school in August 1968. They were married that October. A successful student graduating with honors — and a teaching fellow scholarship — Donna chose to fulfill her “greatest desire” be a wife and mother over the award’s seven-year commitment to teach. The couple’s first child, Chris, was born in 1970, followed by his sister Michelle, two
years later. Donna kept children in her home, did alterations for Trailway Cleaners, bookkeeping for Gattle’s in Blowing Rock and later worked at Northwestern Bank and Watauga Savings and Loan. Chris was in the fourth grade and Michelle in the second when she first worked at Parkway as a teacher’s aide in 1979. It was while she and Gary were building their home — “and needed to make more money,” she says, that she worked at Watauga Savings and Loan. When the secretary’s job came open at Parkway School, Donna was hired, her duties including “a little bit of everything,” she says. “I was the receptionist, took care of attendance, payroll, bookkeeping, nursing — you name it, until Gail Norman was hired as our receptionist.” From helping an on-site electrician — by climbing on top of the office toilet to reach the fuse box — to searching for a student’s dental retainer in the cafeteria trash can, searching the school for a missing grandmother — and making phone calls to discover that she was actually at home, Donna’s done it all. “I’ve walked through the school with the sheriff ’s deputies after the alarm went off, and I’ve made numerous trips back to school after hours and on weekends to let someone inside.” She has also participated on the school’s Relay for Life team, in support of coworkers with cancer. Donna has special memories and stories of students, coworkers and the principals with whom she has worked through the years. Advances in technology and renovation of the school in 1996 are among memorable “changes,” she says; among her most challenging times were deaths of students and their family members “and some really long days.” The Parkway School family — students, faculty and staff — has always worked hard to live up to its slogan of ‘Parkway Proud,’ Donna says. “There’s always been such a special feeling there. We have loved and cared for each other.” A few students particularly stand out in her mind, Donna says. “Years ago, James would not stay in his chair, so one day I told him if he got out one more time, I’d tie him to the chair. Up he went, so with some macramé roping, I slipped up behind him and (loosely) tied him to the chair. From that day on he loved it and wanted to be tied up all the time.”
Surrounded by her family is where Donna Gragg loves to be. She is pictured here with her husband Gary, son Chris, daughter Michelle and grandsons Dustin, Brock and Devin. Photos submitted
Roger, she recalls, lacked self confidence and always looked down when she talked to him — until she encouraged him to look her in the eye when they talked. Her nephew, Brandon, had his classmates whispering “Hi, Donna,” when walking down the hall. Libby, who always noticed how she dressed, and if her toenails were painted, called her Donna, too, and told her and the teacher — as they prepared to transfer to third grade — that they had “a lot to learn” to be able to teach cursive writing and multiplication tables. Not only did she work with two or three generations of students, Donna says, she was also fortunate to work with nieces and nephews, her own children and two of her three grandsons, Devin and Brock “who went all the way through their school days at Parkway with me,” she says. “I retired this year and Devin graduated from high school.” Her hopes for Parkway, and local schools in general, include better pay, “because most people go into this profession for love, not money, but they deserve so much more.” Donna anticipates spending more time with her family, including her mother, who has always inspired her. “I love to help her with her yard work, and I want her to teach me to quilt,” She would also like to have a green house, take a photography class and travel more, in addition to pursuing her hobbies of cooking, sewing, gardening and reading. “I also love taking walks with my sister-in-law.” Gary, Donna’s husband of 48 years recently retired as a builder, but has already enlisted her help to construct a new building on their property, as well as a new deck
on their house. “I’ll help him, but I do not climb ladders,” she says with a laugh. Their son, Chris, is also a builder and grows Christmas trees. Her daughter, Michelle, is a longtime nurse assistant at Boone Dermatology. Donna is especially proud of her grandsons. Recent high school graduate Devin Hollar took first place in the state’s U.S. Skill’s competition (construction) and just returned from national competition in Louisville, Ky.; Dustin Gragg, also a recent high school graduate is pursuing a career in criminal justice, and Brock Hollar, is a rising senior at Watauga High School and an avid fisherman. Donna says she couldn’t have been more blessed with having been raised in a Christian home and marrying into one. “My father-in-law became a father to me, and I could never make mother-inlaw jokes, because mine was an absolute saint.” Donna is a longtime active member of Mount Vernon Baptist Church, where she volunteers with preschool classes and in the office. What advice does she have for young women starting out in their career today? “Give 100 percent to everything you do.” What about raising a family? “Cherish every moment and don’t sweat the small stuff.” It’s because nice matters.
sherrie norris Editor, All About Women
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‘Pretty in Pink’ A Sisterhood of Fashionable Success
Models participating in the 2016 Pretty In Pink fashion show included: Standing: Lisa Townsend, Amy Harris, Kim Krege Florio, , Dave Smith, Rob Getty and Brian Whitfield. Front row, sitting: Candy Jones Marion Krege, Roy Krege and Julie Getty.
Breast cancer survivor Lisa Townsend and her mother, Barbara Shomaker.
On Friday, June 17, a crowd of women — and a few compassionate men — adorned in varying shades of pink filled the dining room of the clubhouse at Grandfather Golf and Country Club in support of the Avery County Cancer Resource Center. With 182 in attendance, the 12th annual “pink gala” proved to be the most successful, to date. Guests were welcomed by the event’s honorary chairwoman, Mary Morgan; the invocation was led by Chuck Mantooth, president of Watauga Medical Center and CEO of Cannon Memorial Hospital. Enjoying plates of delicacies that included grilled peaches, petite greens, thyme essence and raspberry rose mousse cake, attendees appreciated a special performance of “Dream the Impossible Dream” by Bill Martin and Paul Adamson Regaled in this year’s trendiest pink fashions provided by Belk of Boone Mall, models included Candy Jones, Marion Krege, Roy Krege, Kim Krege Florio, Dave Smith, Brian Whitfield, and Rob Getty, representing the caregivers, family members and friends of those who have battled cancer. Also modeling and sharing stories of their personal encounters 38
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Photos by Hollie Greene
with breast cancer — and their victory over the disease — included survivors Lisa Townsend, Amy Harris and Julie Getty. “Cancer can be a hope and inspiration. It is not a death sentence. There can be life after cancer.” Those were the opening remarks of keynote speaker Gail Haller, an operating room nurse, who, after a regular yearly mammogram, was diagnosed with breast cancer in August 2011. Because her cancer was found early, Gail underwent just six weeks of radiation treatments before being declared cancer free. The fear and anxiety she felt during that difficult time was lessened by the love of her family, community and healthcare providers, she related. Gail also shared how finding a prayer shawl soon after her diagnosis — one that seemed to be given anonymously — was somehow a message sent to her from her late loved ones as a reminder to be strong and hold tightly to her faith. “We are a sisterhood,” Gail stressed to her audience. “We are there for each other through the waiting game, through the treatments — and through the recovery. Together, this is possible.” In conclusion, Gail read the poem, “What Cancer Can-
not Do,” which highlights the beautiful and precious things about life that cancer cannot take from those whose bodies it inhabits. She also encouraged women to get regular mammograms. Committee chairperson Sallie Woodring recognized the generosity of dedicated event committee members. She also reminded guests, “We are in this fight together. We are survivors. Being here today will make a difference.” Sallie also shared that through various fundraisers during the year, including the Pretty in Pink luncheon, $27,000 had been raised to meet the needs of cancer patients, specifically in Avery County. Food, music, fashion and commitment undergird the essential message shared throughout this event — together, we can dream the impossible dream and we can achieve it. All proceeds from the event benefited the Avery County Cancer Resource Center at Cannon Memorial Hospital.
Hollie Greene Hollie Greene is an English teacher who loves stories, words and the mountains of North Carolina.
things we
LOVE
LINEN CLEANER Portfolio linen spray and linen wash by Le Blanc. Treat yourself to perfectly laundered sheets. We carry several fragrances but portfolio is our favorite! Wash is $31.95 and spray is $20. Northern Parker Interiors BOOTS Double D Ranchwear Fronteir Trapper in Blue. Watsonatta Western World www.booneboots.com JEANS Miss Me Women's Glitter Hour Boot Cut Jeans. Watsonatta Western World www.booneboots.com PAINTING "Barn in the mountains" by Bee Sieburg – one of our very favorite artists! Northern Parker Interiors AGENDAS Lilly Pulitzer Agendas and More. Shoppes at Farmers Hardware. www.shoppesatfarmers.com RING "Las Americas" silver jewelry from silver mining town of Taxco, Mexico. Shoppes at Farmers Hardware. www.shoppesatfarmers.com
Travel
The World’s 12 Most
Incredible Foods
As I float to sleep some nights, I’m dreaming of the yummiest, most wonderful foods I’ve ever eaten. So far, I’ve drawn up a list of 12 from all over the world, but I’m already fantasizing about my next 12! I hope your mouth is already watering. Pretty hungry after attending a twilight light show at the Great Pyramids and the Sphinx in Cairo, we pulled up in our minibus to our leader Emen’s favorite drive-in. What followed were huge falafel sandwiches — crunchy and spicy, doused with a creamy yogurt sauce and enfolded in a warm pita. Mmmm! My friend Ev, who was a missionary in Pakistan ages ago, still makes tasty potato-and-pea-filled samosas. I was delighted to find the crisp samosas, triangles of fried dough, stuffed with spicy vegetables, in Bhaktapur, Nepal, and again in Yandabo, Burma at a village open-air restaurant. Just as amazing as Ev’s! 40
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On a bleak December day near the waterfront in Lisbon, Portugal, our group was shivering and gloom-filled. Eduardo, our leader, had promised us a surprise. Soon, a delivery boy arrived with a big cardboard box of pasteis de Belem, sweet, gooey custard tarts accompanied by packets of cinnamon and powdered sugar for dusting. What a treat! It was New Year’s Eve 2011 — and bone-chillingly cold in Zagreb, Croatia. We wandered through the Christmas Market, hungry for a new experience. Open-air stalls were selling the traditional hot mulled wine; however, our eyes lit upon a stand selling steaming paper cones filled with small chocolatedrenched donut balls. Wow! Food for the soul! Our first trip to a country that felt totally foreign was to Morocco. Sitting on puffy silken cushions at a rose-petalstrewn table, we would have thought
anything served to us was incredible. The “anything” was a tagine, a glazed clay pot with a dome-shaped cover, containing a slowly-simmered stew of vegetables, olives, apricots, raisins, dates, nuts and preserved lemons, seasoned with cinnamon, saffron, ginger and turmeric and served over fluffy couscous. Delectable! The only problem was that each succeeding day we were served — you guessed it — tagine with couscous! I was in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, alone and lonely, attending a writing workshop. Wandering the streets looking for breakfast, I stopped at a small restaurant where an old man dressed all in white with a white sombrero was serenading the diners with a wooden flute. I ordered chilaquiles, strips of tortilla fried with onion, grilled with eggs and topped with Mexican cheese and salsa. A cup of hot chocolate made this the true breakfast of champions.
Leaving Key West, I noticed “The Blond Giraffe,” a key lime pie stand. Even though it was 10 a.m., we stopped and got the most decadent dessert ever. Are you ready? — key lime pie on a stick, dipped in dark chocolate and frozen. Aaaah! Mexican food in the USA? Definitely, if it’s in Eureka Springs, Ark., a “hippieish” town with a cozy vibe. Here’s where to go: The Oasis, a funky Ark-Mex hole in the wall down a flight of stairs, so small you can barely squeeze in. The enchiladas and the salsa verde — any anything else you order — are simply to die for! I don’t have to leave the USA (and besides that, El Salvador would not be the best vacation destination in the world right now, according to the State Department) to enjoy the world’s most delicious pupusas at Pupuseria La Bendicion in Cleveland. The thin, hand-pounded corn cakes with queso blanco (Mexican cheese) and herbs sandwiched in, fried on a grill, then topped with salsa and a kind of cole slaw mixture, aim you heavenward. Add in a cold glass of horchata (rice milk with cinnamon, vanilla and sugar) and sweet fried plantains. What a meal! You don’t have to go to Vietnam — only to Cleveland — to encounter the finest Vietnamese food. “My” dish: Bun Tofu Xao Xari, at Tay Do restaurant, is a big bowl of spicy fried tofu strips, bean sprouts, thin noodles, onion and lettuce with a tasty brown sauce. And right here in Banner Elk, at Cam Ranh Bay, try the delicate tofu-and-noodle spring rolls dipped in a phenomenal peanut sauce: the best ever.
Tom Kha, Thailand’s signature soup, is the nectar of the Goddess. My first day in Thailand, in a nondescript local restaurant, the very first dish set before me was Tom Kha. Coconut milk, lemon grass, ginger, lime juice, Thai chili paste, basil and cilantro — gently simmered, then spooned and sipped slowly by the lucky diner. I once had a soup made especially for me. Mohinga, the national dish of Burma, is usually made with fish sauce — not good for me, a vegetarian. On our small ship on the Irawaddy River, one morning our head waiter had a surprise: a vegetarian mohinga — ginger, garlic, fried onions, hot pepper, chickpea flour and noodles — lovingly prepared by the ship staff. What a way to wake up! Is your mouth watering? Your curiosity piqued? What will your list of 12 unimaginably magnificent foods look like? Why not start right now with my two local favorite hangouts: Monsoon Thai restaurant, south of Mountain City, or Cam Ranh Bay Vietnamese restaurant in Banner Elk? Wherever you go, Charlotte or Asheville, Chapel Hill or Raleigh, find a Turkish, Malaysian, Ethiopian, Caribbean or Indochinese restaurant, and lay claim to the best (you fill in the blank) ever! Happy eating!
sue spirit Writes poetry and essays about nature, spirituality, writing, and travel. She has a little cabin in the mountains. degreesoffreedom@frontier.com
Dr. Blaire Warren
I Truly Appreciate Our Patients For An Amazing First Year! 2016
2015
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Betty Greene A heart for serving others
Of all the joys in life, says Betty Greene, pictured center, nothing compares to the time she spends with her family, as evidenced by this photo taken on the Florida coast. Photo submitted
Betty Greene of Boone has spent a lifetime helping others — as a child on the family farm, as a daughter, wife, mother, grandmother and an active church and community member. Known for giving of herself in countless ways to improve life for those around her, Betty’s efforts have not gone unnoticed. Earlier this year, she was honored with the prestigious North Carolina Baptist Heritage Award or her work with Baptist Children's Homes of North Carolina. The award recognizes those who represent exemplary service and giving to organizations associated with the Baptist State Convention, said Michael Blackwell, organizational president, who presented the award in April. Describing Betty as “an exemplary trustee of Baptist Children’s Homes, now in her second four-year term,” Blackwell called her “a marvelous example of how one woman can make a difference in the lives of many.” Betty has also been actively involved in the Joy Cove ministry in Zionville, an arm of the BCHNC that provides homes 42
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for developmentally disabled adults. As Blackwell pointed out, Betty can’t remember a time when she wasn’t a part of the Baptist Children’s Homes. As a child, she rode with her father in his truck to deliver loads of food to children living at Mills Home in Thomasville. Blackwell called those trips, “the beginning of a life-long love affair between Betty and Baptist Children’s Homes.” “As a child, when I made those trips with my daddy, it was difficult for me to understand why children were not with their parents,” Betty says. “But, it helped me later when neighboring children had to go to a children’s home. At least I knew they were well cared for.” Through the years, Betty’s outreach to others has extended far and wide, but she will always cherish those formative years.
In the beginning Born at home with the assistance of Dr. Perry, Betty was raised on the family farm in Boone, near where she has lived the majority of her life. “My mother, younger sister Judy and I lived a short time in Maryland when
Daddy was in the Navy,” she said. “We were there less than a year when the war ended and we all came back to Boone and my daddy went back to farming.” Betty attended Boone Demonstration School, which was part of the university, she says. “I played sports and was in the band there before going on to Appalachian High School, where I met Dale Greene, a friend of my uncle, Sammy Critcher.” Betty’s mother, Selma Critcher Hollar, came from a large family in which several of the younger children were close to Betty’s age. “We were always together,” she recalls. “I enjoyed the time I spent with them on their dairy farm, except for when I spent the night and had to get up at the crack of dawn to help milk the cows.” In retrospect, Betty says, those were wonderful times spent with people she dearly loved. “I had a real good life, both as a youngster and since Dale and I married and had our family,” she adds. Betty and her two younger siblings, sister Judy Eller of Boone and brother Bob Hollar of Hickory, represent several
generations of Watauga County heritage. “Our roots are deep in this area,” she says. “Our ancestors on both sides go back a long way and have connections to many local families, including the Crithers, Hollars, Hartleys, Hayes and Trivettes.” Betty and Dale were married the year they graduated from high school. “After 58 years of marriage, we have proven that teenage love can be a lasting thing,” she says. Dale was working for O.M. Hampton Construction Company when they got married; her daddy was farming and was trying to do everything by himself, Betty says, when he realized he needed help and asked Dale to work for him. “About two years later, they decided to form a partnership,” she says. “They bought another truck and it went from there.” The couple started their life together living with Dale’s parents until Gwen, their first child, was born. “We moved into a trailer in Perkinsville, and then bought another one, 8-by42-ft., where we lived with our first three children,” she says. As Hollar and Greene Produce expanded, the families began spending winters in Florida, where they were able to grow crops year-round. “Our children, all five of them, went to school half a year here; and the other half down there,” she says. “They didn’t seem to mind changing schools and all of us made lifelong friends in both locations.” As Dale worked hard in the business, Betty stayed equally busy with the children — in school, church, sports and other community functions in which they participated. “I was always involved, wherever they were, and served on the PTO at Parkway School for 20 years, “ she says with a chuckle. “There was 15 years between Gwen and Jeff, our youngest, and since 1964 until this year, I’ve had a child or grandchild at Parkway. At one time, I had three of my kids in high school playing sports, one at Parkway and one at home. It was a busy life, but I loved it all.” After Betty’s father retired, the Greenes' sons Tim, Tony and Jeff, started coming to work for the business, with Gwen’s husband, Keith Honeycutt, leading the way. Today, they all are employed in the family business, as well as Tony’s
wife, Terri. Betty’s life has revolved around her family, she says, but admits her relationship with the Lord comes first. It’s that connection, she says, “and a lot of prayer,” that helped her raise her family. “People used to ask me how I dealt with it, when I had teenage drivers, and I would always tell them I just have to trust that God will take care of them and see them through. And, he did.” Betty’s faith in God — and her willingness to serve him — has occupied a big part of her life, she admits. A member of Mount Vernon Baptist Church since childhood, “and always involved in church in one way or another,” including serving in the prayer room ministry, Betty has had a heart for mission work on many levels. She has worked with all age groups in her church — from leading Mission Friends and Girls in Action to serving as longtime director of the Women’s Missionary Union — and helping meet the needs of both foreign and home missionaries in their work and respite. Betty was instrumental in securing a home for a missionary family on furlough, who spent their time locally, and worked countless hours in refurbishing the home for them prior to their arrival. Whether serving on the board of directors for Crisis Pregnancy Center (now Hope Center) or taking part in a mission’s opportunities near and far, Betty always gravitates to children. In Turkey, she cared for missionaries’ children, many of whom had never interacted with strangers, but Betty quickly embraced them and won their hearts. On mission trips to New York and Montana, Betty worked mainly with children through Vacation Bible School and backyard Bible studies. She has also helped locally with the county’s home-delivery meal service. Since the ‘60s, Betty and her family have continued to divide their time between Boone and Flagler Beach, near the vast inland farms of Hollar and Greene, from where produce, mainly cabbage and potatoes, are transported all along the east coast. Betty also loves to read and travel. “I have loved seeing the Canadian Rockies and did a tour of all the canyons,” she says. “Dale doesn’t care for traveling as
much as I do, but we have enjoyed many trips together.” She has always enjoyed sewing and quilting, the latter of which she learned from her grandmother, Jennie Hollar. “ “I used to sew a lot for the kids, sometimes out of necessity and some just because I loved to do it,” she says. Betty has kept herself busy with church and the family, she says, while Dale has worked hard to build the business and provide for their family. “For many years, he not only helped grow the crops, but also loaded and hauled the produce, too,” she says. Dale loves to work and has been a wonderful husband, father and grandfather, she says. “At this time of our lives, he is able to spend more quality time with our grandchildren than he did with our children, which he really enjoys.” Dale has always been supportive of Betty’s interests, she says. “Anything I’ve wanted to do or needed to do, he’s been there for me.” As a family, the Greenes enjoy sporting events, especially App State’s Mountaineer football. “Because our boys played football at ASU, we have continued to support the program and we go to all the games, whether at home or away,” she says. They also support the activities of their grandchildren — “from dance to sports.” The Greenes children—Gwen, Tony, Tim, Pam and Jeff — all live in Boone and have blessed them, Betty says, with 14 grandchildren and two great grandchildren, the latter two of which were just recently baptized. “I am grateful that our children and grandchildren have followed our example to love the Lord and to serve others,” she says. “Several of them are involved in various ministries and mission work, locally and abroad.” Public acclaim is not something Betty seeks, she says, in regards to this article and the award she received earlier this year. “I feel very unworthy of and humbled by the recognition, but I don’t do what I do to get awards.” sherrie norris Editor, All About Women
AAWMAG.COM | AUGUST 2016
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BEAUTY
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Sun
The
Summertime is here and with it comes all things outdoors. We have approximately 161 days of gloomy skies in the High Country each year, so we welcome the predicted 204 days of sunshine. That magnificent and wonderful “’Mr. Sun” — that woos us with warmth and makes us feel so vibrantly alive — can wreak havoc on us if we underestimate his fierce power. We have to remain mindful that among other things, he has a great impact on how our skin ages. It remains puzzling to me when I have a client who has spent tons of money on face work—from Botox, fillers and fat infusion, to facelifts or whatever the next new “in” thing is. The puzzle is when I ask if they are using some sort of sun protection on a daily basis, and the answer is usually, “well, when I’m in the sun.” I always probe further to find out what “in the sun” means to them; to most, it means when I’m gardening, playing golf or at the beach. If you go out of your house, drive your car or go shopping, you are in the sun, unless it is nighttime. Hence you do need to be protecting that precious skin that you’re trying to keep as youthful as possible.
Consider the following facts when you think about the wonderful skin you live in: The most exclusive, expensive wrinkle cream cannot compare to the lowly oftneglected sunscreen in fighting wrinkles and other lurking things. Beyond our sometimes obsession with looking good, skin cancer is a major riveting reason to protect ourselves from the laser blast of UVA and UVB rays the sun aims at us daily. I know you’ve heard it before, but if you have yet to heed it, listen up: 3.3 million Americans have some type of skin cancer; 76,380 have melanoma — the deadly type. Someone dies every 52 minutes from melanoma. Girlfriends, this
Skin
and Your
is so preventable. Now, a quick word about tanning beds — DON’T!
Know your enemy UVA rays, called aging rays, contribute to 90 percent of skin aging. These penetrate through the epidermis (top dead layer) into the dermis (live layer), which contains connective tissue, blood, lymph vessels, collagen and elastin. All the “stuff ” that helps our skin be healthy is located here. You can slather on all the creams, serum and potions you like, but without protection from the sun, you give a free access pass to everything that can make you look old, wrinkle and can kill you. Some of the results of sun damage are dark patches, wrinkles, loose skin, premature aging, and DNA damage. Oh yes, these rays go right through glass. UVB rays, called burning rays, are those that cause that tan you so desperately want. These rays affect the melanocytes, which produce melanin. Melanin is designed to help protect the skin from UV, but can be altered or destroyed by large frequent doses that are allowed to penetrate the skin. The irony of this is that this assault on the skin causes the melanin (that tan stuff ) to rise to the surface as it fights to protect the skin from the self-inflicted damage. This damage
builds and speeds up aging and increases your risk for skin cancer. UVB does not penetrate as deeply, but equally damages the skin and can damage eyes, as well. On a high note, UVB contributes to the body’s synthesis of Vitamin D and other important minerals.
Equip yourself Who needs sunscreen? Everybody. Keep babies under 6 months of age out of direct sun. When should I wear it? 365 days a year. Use a broad-spectrum sunscreen, one that addresses UVA and UVB. There are countless on-the-market creams, lotions, gels, waxes and sprays. Check expiration date (shelf life twothree years). Liberally apply — one ounce should cover, face, hands, arms, legs, feet and any exposed skin. Reapply every two hours, especially when swimming. Use other preventatives along with sunscreen — hats, sunglasses and clothing, to cover your skin. Seek shade between 10 a.m.- 4 p.m. Stay beautiful and healthy! Marion Edwards Marion Edwards is a Licensed Esthetician, Professional Makeup Artist and Certified Trainer for Motives Cosmetics. She can be contacted at 828.262.5954.
21 Elliott Properties 74896Century 202 Southgate Drive Suite 19 | Boone, NC century 21828.264.9111 www.c21elliottboone.com | c21boone@gmail.com
Residential, Commercial and Fine Estates *Each office is independently owned and operated. AAWMAG.COM | AUGUST 2016
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Sallie J. Woodring Revealing the light
Sallie Woodring, pictured with her husband John Woodring, at left, their daughter, Brittanie and husband, Ronnie McKinney.
Representing at least four, maybe five generations in Avery County, Sallie J. Woodring’s “claim to fame” is in being a descendant of the Banners who founded Banner Elk, and, as a result, carrying a love for the High Country with roots that run deep. Growing up in Banner Elk with two brothers and a sister, Sallie graduated from Avery High School, attended Lees McRae College and received a degree in accounting. From her first job in nursing in 1992, to her current work as the Director of Volunteer Services at Appalachian Regional Healthcare System — and through struggles and victories of her own — Sallie continues to reveal the light, love and beauty that abounds in her Western
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North Carolina homeland. Sallie describes herself as “a people person” who has always wanted to leave people with a smile. Beginning in long-term care that expanded to marketing and admissions and, eventually, to volunteer director, Sallie enjoys jobs that allow her to have multiple focuses, as she is a self-proclaimed “crazy multi-tasker,” a skill she acquired from her mother. In her early years at Appalachian Regional Healthcare System, Sallie learned to create a hospital environment that focuses on total healing in mind, body and spirit. It was her goal, she says, to make hospitals feel “less like institutions and more like homes.” Similarly, in working with 260 hospital volunteers, Sallie wants hospital experi-
ences for patients to be as encouraging and comforting as possible. Her volunteers are “a family,” she says, who give the most precious gift of time to patients in our area. Her work with the volunteers remains Sallie’s favorite part of her job. The needs of her patients were highlighted when Sallie’s “charmed life” began to unravel when, in the late 1990s, her father was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease. Up until that time, Sallie had enjoyed a successful career, the gifts of her first family and marriage to John Woodring, as well as the birth of their daughter, Brittanie. As unexpected illness began to seep into her world, Sallie became more aware of patients’ needs for sincere care and their desperate need for encouragement
These are two of many examples of the pastoral scenes captured by Sallie Woodring around the High Country.
and support through life-threatening journeys. While attending a cancer fundraiser in a neighboring town, Sallie thought, “Why not do this here — why not bring this kind of event to the High Country?” And, that is exactly what she did. Sallie’s idea for the “Pretty in Pink” gala, a benefit luncheon for the Cancer Resource Center that features a fashion show of models who are cancer survivors, became a reality in 2005. This annually successful event continues with the most recent luncheon in June hosted by Grandfather Golf and Country Club, with the best turn-out to date. In the midst of various jobs and her focus on caregiving, Sallie’s journey into the first decade of the 21st century was filled with devastating loss and grief. In a period of 22 months, Sallie lost her father, her mother and her younger brother. Of that time — and the five years that followed — “The world without them was silent and dark,” she says, “There was nothing that held beauty.” Although she continued to coordinate, organize, host and fundraise, Sallie says she could be in a room filled with people — and hear nothing. She had lost the voices of her people. “There was no summer. There was no spring. There was nothing,” she describes. Then, in the fall of 2013, Sallie picked up her camera, as she did every year, to try and capture the beauty of the changing leaves. “That day, the air was different,” she says. “The colors were brighter. There was a sun — and it was shining.” She thinks of this time as her reawakening. “I could see the world again,” she explains. From an early age, Sallie loved cameras. She remembers sneaking away
with her mother’s Brownie camera to take pictures and later using her first Polaroid camera. Sallie says, “God used my love for photography to help me see the world again. He uses me to capture the pictures.” Of the beauty found in each of Sallie’s photographs, she explains, “God does the work. I just show up with the camera.” Taking pictures has been part of Sallie’s daily routine since December of the same year that she discovered the colors of fall in a new, invigorating way. Often, she has been “out in the field,” catching the sunrise above Matney, well before she gets to work. “I get lost behind my camera,” she says. “ I forget where I am or what time it is. There is nothing but me and God’s beauty.” Despite the loss of three family members, Sallie says, “With photography, I have found my purpose.” Her prayer continues to be, “God, your beauty will not be wasted on me.” With no formal training, Sallie strives to learn more about the manual functions of a camera, editing programs and “the intense focus you have to have on what you’re going to capture,” she says. She has learned that the light is the most important part of any photograph — and that nature and animals are her favorite subjects. Since her epiphany in 2013, Sallie has taken more than 150,000 pictures. Many have been sold to local businesses. She also has several photographs showcased in the gallery of Fred’s Mercantile on Beech Mountain. When asked about her love for the High Country, Sallie replies, “I love God’s mountains. I love the mountain people, their spirit — and their willingness to share.” She describes the summers here
as magical. “I love that we enjoy distinct seasons. You can do everything here — from horseback riding to kayaking. It’s all here.” Sallie’s “perfect day” would be to enjoy an incredible sunrise, to find amazing images to photograph, to spend time with her husband, daughter and son-in-law, and to end the day with a beautiful sunset and watch the night stars. About tragedy and loss, she advises, “Don’t feel guilty about grieving or sadness. Give yourself time to heal. When people tell you it gets better with time — it doesn’t. That is a lie. It doesn’t get better — it gets different. The key is learning to accept and embrace your new life.” Just as Sallie searches for the right light to capture the image of a beautiful sunrise — or works with volunteers to be the light of hope for hospital patients — the life goal Sallie’s father taught her comes in to play daily, “The main goal of your life should be to leave this world a better place.” Sallie’s spin on this includes, “Your goal should be that the world is a better place because you lived, not because you left.” As Sallie emphasizes to those whose lives are overturned by grief and sadness, “The sun will be bright again, and you will hear the birds chirping.” Each of Sallie’s jobs embody this mantra, as she works tirelessly to reveal the light of the High Country to its people through care, outreach — and the beauty she captures behind her camera lens.
Hollie Greene Hollie Greene is an English teacher who loves stories, words and the mountains of North Carolina.
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Taking Down the Moon by Lisa Muir A collection of 15 short stories, “Taking Down the Moon” by Lisa Muir, is as entertaining as it is thought provoking. What first appear to be light-hearted, whimsical stories about eccentric characters in various places and times are quickly realized to tell inviting stories filled with second and possibly third meanings. In the opening lines of the first story, “The Louche Watermelon Queen,” the reader’s attention is captured by this paradoxical insight from the narrator. “She needed someone to die to stop eating. Someone whose sudden absence would so depress her — just temporarily — making sustenance repugnant.” The irony embedded in the voice of the narrator takes readers on an equally juxtaposed adventure, a trademark of this collection of work. In “You Can’t Collect Time,” the main character, Lanie is advised, “You can’t collect time. You’ve got to spend time.” With careful subtlety, this story describes the changes made when one allows another person into his/her life, and the surprising ways in which transformation can occur: “She promised she would consider the idea, the change. Eric told her he didn’t like her use of consider, that by now he hoped she would feel more confidence in their relationship. One of the variegated lovebirds alighted onto Lanie’s right shoulder and tugged at her hair…Eric could never keep the birds’ names straight…Two weeks later, Lanie sat down before her easel. Usually the bird’s presence in the painting had to grow organically, since it could be placed in any one of a hundred spots. Today, she sketched the bird in first.” As the short story collection continues, readers are taken on journeys to New Zealand, Nevada and the mountains of Western North Carolina. Subjects vary from professors in college classrooms, to a woman who discovers the actual events of her deceased husband’s life, to a young boy whose mother’s moves to live with boyfriends becomes a magical collection of adventures. When asked about her writing process — and the inspiration for her stories — Lisa responds, “Most any writer will have trouble picking a starting point. These stories have been collected, collected, collected. I do a lot of listening. I hear a passing comment and I’ll think, ‘I can’t write that!’ and then I write it down and use it later.” In describing the choices made by her characters, Lisa explains, “I follow my characters and frequently they dictate their decisions to me.” The title story, “Taking Down the Moon,” involves a young boy, Cleo, who compels his mother in saying, “The moon — it’s
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too bright. I can’t sleep. Could you take down the moon?” Exhibiting both grace and strength, the mother does just as the boy asks, as he observes. “When Cleo again saw his mother’s face, it shone from the strain, but in her hands she balanced the great sphere, the night’s stars dangling as if tethered by strings, wearied by the journey. Merely by looking at her, the boy knew the moon’s weight — and loved his mother more than ever, realizing her sway and control. The orb must have been scorching her hands, but she did not flinch.” Similarly, in the final story in the collection, “The Door,” readers are left with equal measures of insight, glimpses of love and sacrifice — and the possibilities found in ambiguity. “You could have told me so many things a hundred years ago,” the daughter implores, to be met with this response: “Tochter, in dreams there are a thousand years.” With a barrage of unexpected twists and turns, Lisa Muir’s “Taking Down the Moon” proves that seeming happenstance can often be just what is needed to make change possible, even in the most routine, mundane parts of life.
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FIT EVENT Tuesday August 30th
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Save About the Author Lisa Muir lives in Boone and teaches English at Wilkes Community College. She holds a doctorate in English in both American and Ethnic Literature from West Virginia University. Lisa is currently working on two novels, and happily lives with her husband, Ken, a sociologist.
Hollie Greene Hollie Greene is an English teacher who loves stories, words and the mountains of North Carolina.
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Date 2017 All About Women Wedding Edition 20 Coming in January nuary Don’t miss being a part of this highly sought ought after issue. FFor more information, contact Rick Tobin at 828-773-0406 VIE W THE 201 6 E DITION A T IS S UU. C OM /M TIM E S /DOC S /A A W JA N FE B 201 6_W E B
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