Jess & Matt A Wedding (Planning) Story

BY HEATHER BRANDON AND JESSICA STUMP

Weddings are back! Okay, okay… weddings never really went away, but after COVID-19-related delays in 2020 and 2021, around 2.5 million couples planned to wed in 2022 according to the New York Times. Additionally, market research firm the Wedding Report estimates that 2023 will see around 2.2 million weddings, which is in line with the number of weddings per year from 2005-2019 as reported by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

This surge in weddings means that couples may have to contend with booked venues and vendors, supply chain issues, and rising costs — the average cost for a wedding was $27,000 in 2021 and 2022 according to the Wedding Report, with the same expected for 2023.

I know from experience that weddings require a great deal of planning and flexibility — I worked at a popular wedding venue during college and planned my own wedding in 2010 — so I wondered how a real couple would go about planning their 2023 wedding. Luckily, I had one to ask! My friend, colleague and work suitemate Jessica Stump just got engaged to her longtime partner (in crime), Matt Hatfield.

Jess and I work together at Appalachian State University. She is lovely — fun and quirky, thoughtful, funny and statuesque — and she loves cats and Halloween. Seriously, her hand-crafted costumes are epic and I look forward to her big reveal each October. I’ve only met Matt a time or two, so I was interested to learn more about the happy couple.

Jess and I were able to chat about her and Matt’s story, how they envision their wedding, the planning process, and 2023 wedding trends.

Jess and Matt: A Perfect Match

I already know some of your story, but for the readers, tell me how you and Matt met and decided to spend your lives together.

Our story begins almost 20 years ago, in a college English class at Morehead State University in Morehead, Kentucky. Matt and I are both writers and we struck up a quick friendship, workshopping each other’s stories and trading class notes. I thought he was funny, creative, intelligent, kind, and maybe even a tad cute (and I still do!). I found myself wondering why I was wondering what he thought of me.

I think, early on, we fell for each other while falling in love with each other’s work. Unfortunately, our paths diverged after college — I headed off to graduate school to pursue a dream of writing stories and poems and Matt went to L.A. in search of lights, cameras, and the stage. “Goodbye” wasn’t a word we wanted to say, but, unbeknownst to us, our paths would cross again.

Around 10 years after that first meeting, we were each back in the state we both call home — KY, the land of bluegrass, bourbon, and award-winning horses draped in roses. We reconnected online and Matt asked me to crash a friend’s wedding, as his guest. I said yes to what he wouldn’t say was a “date.” At the end of the evening, he asked me on a real date.

This was April of 2013, and our first official date was spent walking the streets of downtown Pikeville, Kentucky (which is near my hometown) during the city’s annual Hillbilly Days festival. Perhaps it was the twanging banjos in the park and the funnel cake-filled air that sealed the deal.

Fast-forward to December 2022: After

10 years of sharing our lives and engaging in much silliness, Matt proposed. I said yes!

A Spooky, Gothic Wedding

Congratulations! Now you get to plan a wedding or you could elope. I’m not suggesting that you elope, but you could…

We were considering an international elopement but have since shifted course, deciding that we want friends and family members to be part of our day of celebration.

A wedding it is! I know that you and Matt love Halloween and all things spooky and that this aesthetic will be a part of whatever you plan. So, what do you and Matt envision for your special day?

Our dream wedding borrows from and blends different elements of our personalities, which are actually quite complementary: a Gothic ceremony with romantic touches reflects my poetic side and fascination with the macabre, whereas a reception that captures the spirit of an amped-up Halloween party — with nods to horror movie icons and plenty of spooky details — embodies Matt’s relaxed, fun nature and his love of the horror genre (a love we share).

What are your priorities and expectations?

Our No. 1 priority for the day is to have fun, to be truly present in the moment and enjoy celebrating “us” with family and friends.

Personalization continues to be big! Are there any traditions or special touches you want to incorporate? Have you decided on a color palette?

We are considering incorporating either a candle-lighting ritual or a handfasting ritual into our wedding ceremony, and I plan to ask both my father and my mother to walk with me down the aisle. Rather than walking in rhythm to “Here Comes the Bride,” I’m considering a portion of Bach’s “Toccata and Fugue in D Minor” as my entrance song.

Our wedding palette, which is not yet finalized, will likely consist of black, various shades of purple and red, and possibly silver or gray.

Like me, you are marrying in your thirties, which is fairly common. According to census.gov, the median age at the time of first marriage has consistently been getting older — 28 for women and 30 for men in 2022. As a more mature (and more fabulous) bride, do you feel more comfortable with what you want for your wedding and more capable of getting it?

Thank you for the “fabulous” compliment; I’ll take it! And yes, at this stage of my life, I feel comfortable and secure in who I am — with all of my wants, needs, preferences, and dislikes — and that extends to my upcoming role as a bride.

I won’t pretend as if my wants and preferences are never questioned by others, never considered “odd,” let’s say, but I no longer feel the need to either apologize or justify why I like what I like, why I am who I am, and that’s a beautiful thing. With refined research and negotiating skills, I’m definitely more prepared to seek out what I want for our wedding day than I would have been 10, or even 15 years ago.

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