WOMEN All About
December 2014
free
Keeping the Traditions Alive with
Jo Rhetta Gardner Mary Elder Respected Matriarch at 104
Elizabeth Hardy Powerhouse of Knowledge
Willine Smith Ashe County’s Hat Lady
Glenda Treadaway Helping to Empower
Diana Mast White World Traveler
Celebrating 30 Years of Service! Boone Mall | 1180 Blowing Rock Road | Boone, NC 28607 | (828) 264-8977
Your One Stop Shop for all your Formalwear Needs.
The Wedding Experts!
12
Days of Christmas
SALE
GIFTS UNDER $50
www.SouthsClothiers.com
House 60693
Save the Date OUR WEDDING ISSUE HITS THE STANDS NEXT MONTH! We combine our January and February magazines into a special wedding edition, complete with features on local brides, tips for planning, fashion, beauty, food and budgets. It is a special edition you won’t want to miss! Look for it in late January.
WOMEN All About
To advertise, contact Rick Tobin 828.773.0406
Christmas wishes from the home of
Jo rhetta & jimmy gardner
Photo by Sherrie Norris
publisher Gene Fowler
executive editor Tom Mayer
editor Sherrie Norris sherrie@aawmag.com 828.264.3612, ext. 251
writers Emily Apple Sherry Boone Heather Brandon Sharon Carlton Bonnie Church Yogi Collins Marion Edwards Hollie Greene James Howell Mary McKinney Sejal Shah Sue Spirit
production & design Meleah Bryan Marianne Koch Kristin Powers
Photo by Sherrie Norris
advertising Rick Tobin 828.773.0406
cover photo by Sherrie Norris
Any reproduction of news articles, photographs or advertising artwork is strictly prohibited without permission from management. ŠCopyright 2014 A Mountain Times Publication
contents women in the news living well diana mast white beauty mary elder high country courtesies glenda treadaway mom’s world young at heart jo rhetta gardner fashion BRAHM exhibit features local pioneers willine smith by the book marriage and family corner elizabeth baird hardy yoga with sejal shah sherry greene recipes bloom where you’re planted
jo rhetta gardner
12 diana mast white
16 mary elder
7 10 12 14 16 18 20 22 24 26 30 32 34 36 38 40 42 44 47 49
26
20
40
glenda treadaway
elizabeth baird hardy
DECEMBER 2014
5
editor’s note
Oh, how I love December and all the magic it seems to bring. For just a few days, after the shopping, wrapping, decorating and baking have been completed, I feel free, at last, as I take a breather and relax by the fire in the comforting glow of our lighted tree. For just a little while, I truly feel the peace on earth and the silent night that we sing about — and for which we yearn, but rarely experience. I like to be still and enjoy the serenity of the season, when all is said and done. I love it when my son, Garrett, and daughter-in-law, Sara, spend Christmas Eve with us and later, enjoy breakfast and giftgiving together. For the first time ever, however, my son, Garrett, won’t wake up at my house on Christmas morning this year. As a relatively new law enforcement officer, he is scheduled to work long shifts on both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I can’t think about it right now. But, we will have our special time together on the next day and revel in the news that Garrett and Sara have already given me: that I am going to be a grandmother! I will make no apologies for these editorial notes that will be filled with “Nana-ness” in the coming months — or as long as I continue in this role. Of course, my grandchild will be the cutest, sweetest and smartest baby to ever be born — how could I expect less? Don’t we first-time grandparents have a right to gloat, just a little bit? I’m no different than any of you who have already walked this walk. There are no words to adequately express the joy that springs from the inside of my heart and soul. I am beyond thrilled and can hardly contain my excitement! I have been praying for this precious child for a long time. When I hold it in my arms for the first time, it will be the greatest gift I’ve been given in 25 years since that icy Thanksgiving Eve when Garrett entered the world. Yes, Christmas represents God’s greatest gift to all of us — and for our family, this year, he’s making it extra special. Those must be raindrops on the page. It couldn’t possibly be my tears. Joy to my world, again.
6
DECEMBER 2014
WOMENINTHENEWS Area girls take first place in National Gingerbread House Competition Good friends Chloe Jennings and Allie Church, both 12-year-old homeschool students from the Purlear community, took first place honors in the youth division (ages 9-12) at the 22nd annual National Gingerbread House Competition Nov. 17 at The Omni Grove Park Inn in Asheville. Their winning entry, “Nutmouse Tree House,” required “about 150-200 hours” of intense collaboration, research, planning, baking and decorating before completion, they say. After a year of contemplating their project, the girls narrowed down numerous ideas to “about 20,” Chloe says, which included “101 Dalmations,” but they decided it would be too difficult. Their final decision, “Nutmouse Tree House,” was inspired by the book “Tumtum & Nutmeg,” but rather than have the mice live in a hidden broom closet, they live in a two-story tree “house” with all the amenities, complete with windows, inte-
rior wallpaper, furniture, a ladder, a pond, grass, dirt and so much more. The girls’ winning creation was among more than 150 entries that were evaluated on overall appearance, originality/creativity, difficulty, precision and consistency of theme. All of the contest entries are on display at the Omni Grove Park Inn through Jan. 1. There is no charge for viewing the creations, but a $10 parking charge is requested to help benefit six local nonprofit organizations. Chloe and Allie received blue ribbons, $300 and gift certificates to dinner at the Grove Park Inn. Chloe is the daughter of Lorie and Dale Jennings; her proud maternal grandparents are Lonnie and Ada Webster of Blowing Rock. Allie’s parents are William and Robin Church. For more information about the gingerbread contest, visit www.groveparkinn. com for more information.
Chloe Jennings, left, and Allie Church, right, take top honors in National Gingerbread Competition at Omni Grove Park Inn. Photo by Lorie Jennings
Watauga Medical Center receives Golden Bow Award from North Carolina Breastfeeding Coalition On Oct. 29, the North Carolina Breastfeeding Coalition honored Watauga Medical Center with the Golden Bow Award for its efforts to protect and promote the health of mothers and children. WMC is among select maternity facilities awarded by the NCNC for refusing to advertise on behalf of infant formula companies, and therein support the health of mothers and babies. The Golden Bow Awards are a way to commend hospitals for stopping the distribution of infant formula bags to new mothers. Formula manufacturers label their bags as “free gifts,” but Golden Bow
Award recipients choose, instead, to promote health, and are therefore denying formula companies opportunities to advertise infant formula. Research indicates that the marketing of breast milk substitutes in healthcare settings decreases the rates of breastfeeding initiation, duration and exclusivity. The removal of these powerful forces of formula marketing from these hospitals means that North Carolinian women will be more likely to give their babies the best start in life through breastfeeding. The NCBC brings together breastfeeding advocates, health care providers, agencies, individuals, organizations and
families to support, protect and promote breastfeeding in the state of North Carolina. Founded in 2005, NCBC provides a forum for development and exchange of resources for families and breastfeeding professionals. The vision of NCBC is to ensure that exclusive and continued breastfeeding is the norm in North Carolina. To learn more about the Golden Bow Award call 919-630-4460 or visit www. apprhs.org/golden-bow. To learn more about Watauga Medical Center visit www. apprhs.org. DECEMBER 2014
7
WOMENINTHENEWS Watauga women recognized Several Watauga County women were recognized for their contributions to the area’s agricultural success at the 59th annual Farm-City Banquet at Boone United Methodist Church on Nov. 6. Photos by Anna Oakes
Lillian Danner, former home extension agent, was honored for her many years of service by Sue Counts, former Watauga County Cooperative Extension Director.
Cooperative extension agent Wendy Patoprsty, left, receives the Spirit of Farm City award from Dick and Joan Hearn.
8
DECEMBER 2014
Katy Wilson, left, receives the Beekeeper of the Year award from presenter and last year’s winner Lyn Soeder.
Ellen Beatty receives the Youth in Agriculture award from Jim Hamilton.
WOMENINTHENEWS at Farm City Banquet
Courtney Baines-Smith, second from left, receives the community volunteer award from cooperative extension director Jim Hamilton, left.
Bandana’s owners Mary Hall, right, and her husband, Mike Hall, left, receive the Friend of Agriculture Award from Jim Hamilton, center.
Cooperative Extension Administrative Assistant Suzanne Winebarger receives an award from Joey Clawson of the Watauga County Christmas Tree Growers Association.
Susan Preston Owen, right, receives the Woman in Agriculture award from Lynne Getz; Susan is the manager of a garden that produces food for the F.A.R.M. CafĂŠ in Boone.
DECEMBER 2014
9
LivingWell
Feed your ‘bug fighter’
Bugs — also known as bacteria and viruses — continually assault the body, especially through the skin, lungs, nose and mouth, and which, around the clock, your immune system silently defends your body against. You only notice it ‘at work,’ when the enemy bugs penetrate that first line of defense. When this happens, your immune system steps up its activity and you feel achy, itchy and ill. The immune system will use heat to drive out the enemy. This heat can take the form of inflammation, fever or sore spots on the skin. It will also try to flush out the bugs with unsavory body fluids of every type. The war feels awful. The key to avoiding sickness is to keep your immune system as healthy as possible, so it can keep your enemies at bay. The most important immune boosters are the foods you choose to eat. You can help your immune system take care of you by feeding it these foods. Antioxidant-rich foods: Antioxidants support the production of white blood cells, which are needed to engulf the bugs and flush them out. Vitamin C, a key antioxidant, also helps keep the mucous membranes healthy. These membranes, located throughout the body, help fight the bugs at the gate.They include: citrus, red bell pepper (ounce for ounce, it has twice the C as citrus fruits), berries, spinach and broccoli. Other powerful fighters include: • Garlic, with its immune-boosting properties, come from a heavy concentration of sulphur-containing compounds, such as allicin, which has been shown to have antimicrobial properities. • Ginger packs some heat in the form of gingerol, a relative of capsaicin. Heat helps drive out infection. • Fermented dairy, especially yogurt and kefir, with “live and active cultures,” provide the good bugs that crowd out the bad. • Nuts, especially almonds, are packed with vitamin E, an important partner to vitamin C in warding off colds and flus. • Turmeric, the colorful herb (curry) has been shown to contain flu and cold fighting properties. It is also a powerful anti-inflammatory. • Mushrooms have been used in Chinese medicine for hundreds of years.
The key to avoiding sickness is to keep your immune system as healthy as possible, so it can keep your enemies at bay. The most important immune boosters are the foods you choose to eat. - Bonnie Church
They offer some of the best immune boosting nutrients on the planet. • Salmon and mackeral contain vitamin D, which is essential for immune support. Make sure it is wild-caught, as farm-raised fish do not provide the same benefits. According to the Harvard School of Public Health, many of us can benefit from taking a multivitamin/mineral to fill in the gaps in the diet. Even when you try to eat right, food is often handled in a way that can deplete these vital nutrients. For example, oranges picked before ripe and shipped cross country can have little or no vitamin C left by the time they reach your grocery store shelves. To ensure you are getting the nutrients you need, choose an easily-digested multivitamin. Pills in hard tablets are
difficult for your body to assimilate. Make sure your multivitamin provides at least the standard daily recommended nutrients. Remember: When it comes to your immunity, you are what you eat. Eat well to live well.
bonnie church Certified Life and Wellness Coach Author, columist, motivational speaker and certified trainer for TLS Weight Loss Solution
DECEMBER 2014
11
Diana Mast White World Traveler
Diana in South Africa
One hundred, twenty — and counting. That is the number of countries Diana Mast White has visited. She has 75 more to go, she says, and already, she has come close to rivaling the number of trips Hillary Clinton took as Secretary of State. Many of the countries Diana has not traveled to — so far — are those places that the U.S. State Department recommends we avoid. But, this intrepid voyager is happiest when she’s traveling to places off the beaten path. When Diana announces to friends that she’s off to yet another remote part of the globe, they invariably ask, “Where is that?” And “Is it safe there?” From Albania, Antarctica, Antigua and Bosnia, Herzegovina and Czech Republic, to Lithuania, Macedonia, Tasmania, Trinidad and Tobago, Ukraine and Uruguay and Vietnam, Diana has never been afraid while traveling. “I haven’t 12
DECEMBER 2014
Off The Beaten Path taken any foolish chances,” she says. “I don’t walk around alone after dark; I have never felt I was in danger.” Talking about offbeat places, Diana recently spoke to members of High Country Lifelong Learning about her trip to the “Five Stans,” — Kazakhstan, Tajikistan, Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan and Kyrgyzstan, all of which became independent countries in 1991, after the fall of the Soviet Union. Diana found the people there friendly and welcoming with some speaking several languages. These are ancient countries along “The Silk Road.” Diana was especially admiring of Jabar, her trip guide in Turkmenistan, whose parents fled their country by night in 1931 to avoid the Soviet takeover. They settled in Afghanistan, where Jabar attended a school taught in Persian. Graduating first in his class, he went on to medical school. Later, fleeing the Taliban,
the family moved to a refugee camp in Pakistan. In 1991 they were finally able to move home to Turkmenistan. Jabar, who now speaks eight languages, is just one of the many memorable people Diana has met on the road. Diana’s most important reason for traveling, she believes, is to connect with other people. She feels she has much in common with people in every nation. “We are all very much the same, even with different languages and different living situations,” she explains. “We all love our children and grandchildren, all are proud of our countries, and enjoy meeting other people.”
Asked how she would advise women who want to get started traveling, Diana has five suggestions:
1
Look into a tour company that has small group tours. She has traveled the most with Overseas Adventure Travel.
Photos submitted
Diana Mast White with school children in Burma
These are much better than large groups, she says. People really get to know each other. As a first venture, you may be more comfortable traveling to an Englishspeaking country. Leave long airplane flights and thirdworld countries for later, when you feel more at ease traveling. Don’t be afraid to talk with locals, to smile and say hello. Travelers are important ambassadors for our country. Being friendly breaks down barriers. Last of all, go, enjoy every minute and have fun. When Diana is not traveling, she enjoys walking, water aerobics and making beautiful trip and family scrapbooks. She has written articles about her trips for Dispatches, the magazine of Overseas Adventure Travel. Another hobby related to her travels is photography — she has taken many professional-quality photos. Diana has never met a country she hasn’t liked, but her favorite is Argentina.
2 3 4 5
Her daughter-in-law, Debora, is from there; Diana has traveled there 13 times, getting to know Debora’s family and friends, and has taken several trips within Argentina with Debora’s mother. In February, Diana will be in Sienna, Italy, studying Italian. She minored in Italian in college and likes to keep current in the language. Where to after Italy? Nicaragua is on Diana’s list, to complete her travels to all of Central America. She traveled to Panama three times on mission trips with her church. She also has her eye on Cyprus. After that, who knows? “Traveling opens up my world and feeds my soul,” Diana says. “I have an open mind to new experiences, trying new things, and stepping outside my comfort zone to learn more about the world.” Bon voyage!
Diana with her scrapbook from her most recent trip to the “The Five Stans.” sue spirit Writes poetry and essays about nature, spirituality, writing, and travel. She has a little cabin in the mountains. degreesoffreedom@frontier.com
DECEMBER 2014
13
BEAUTY
Winterizing Your Skin Alas, too soon summer has come and gone. The once flourishing trees have dropped their foliage and now stand stark and bare — naked without defense, bracing against the promise of winter. We are all busy winterizing our homes, cars and whatever else we need to protect from the impeding ice, snow and cold.
14
DECEMBER 2014
It’s time also to direct our attention to the amazing skin we’re living in — and that means it’s time to change it up and revamp skin care routines. Leading dermatologists suggest changing our routine with the seasons to boost our skin’s natural defenses. Most of us pay lots of attention to taking care of our faces, but do nothing to protect the rest of us.
Moisturize, Moisturize, Moisturize The basic function of moisturizers is to help treat your skin when it’s dry, and to prevent it from drying out again. Moisturizers do this by holding water in the stratum corneum, the outermost layer of the skin (source: Mayo Clinic). But, they
have other functions as well. They can help protect your skin from the environment — applying moisturizer creates a barrier on your skin that keeps oils from escaping and harmful outside elements from causing dryness or irritation The cold and harshness of winter is like a vacuum that sucks moisture right out of the skin, leaving it dry, flaky and itchy. Consider that you’re going from dry inside heat to outside cold frequently, and then you can understand why moisture is an important component of winter skin care. You will probably need to upgrade your facial moisturizer to combat the coming frigid winter onslaught. Even if your skin is oily, you will still need a moisturizer, since oil and moisture are basically apples and oranges. You can be oily and still in need of moisture. Moisturizers can be light, medium or heavy, and your skin type and preference will help you decide what works best for you. Remember, having a heavy hand in applying facial moisturizer can trap dead skin cells — and that brings us to another important part of winterizing: the need to exfoliate. Dry skin cells can build up and impair absorption of moisturizers.
A Word About Hot Showers Yes, its cold outside and a nice, hot, steamy shower would feel so good. Don’t do it. Taking long hot showers in winter is
A few tips:
not the way to go. Hot water causes blood vessels in the epidermis to dilate, resulting in loss of moisture. Your arms and legs have fewer oil glands, so they tend to be drier and scalier than other parts of your body. Years ago, I learned a winter bodymoisturizing trick from a New York dermatologist: I use safflower seed oil bought at any grocery store. Many of the body oils are expensive and contain fragrances and ingredients that can further dry you out. You can add a few drops of your favorite essential oil — and voila — you have an inexpensive moisturizer. I slather it on while still damp to lock in moisture (it’s important that your skin is still damp), then, pat dry with a towel. Olive oil is also good if you can find a way to not smell like a tossed salad.
Lip care: I see so many chapped lips, even in the heat of summer, so winter can be off the charts. To go from chapped and dry to soft and supple is simple: buy a baby toothbrush, wet your lips with oil, like safflower or olive, and gently brush in circular motions.
Dry cracked feet: exfoliate, apply Shea butter, petroleum jelly, even Crisco, and put on a pair of socks before going to bed. Let’s face it, Old Man Winter is coming — whether you are ready or not. Stay beautiful.
Marion Edwards Marion Edwards is a Licensed Esthetician, Professional Makeup Artist and Certified Trainer for Motives Cosmetics. She can be contacted at (828) 262-5954.
DECEMBER 2014
15
ary Guignard Elder was surrounded by family and friends on Oct. 19 as she celebrated her 104th birthday. “I enjoyed every minute of it and I’m still celebrating,” said the lively centenarian a few days later.
M
Banner Elk’s
Mary Elder celebrating ‘a good life’ at 104 16
DECEMBER 2014
Mary’s most recent milestone likely moves her into the spotlight as the High Country’s most senior resident. She doesn’t know what 104 is supposed to be like, and she says, “I never gave much thought to making it to this point, either.” Born in 1910 to James and Anna VonCanon Guignard, Elder has fond memories of her childhood and takes great pride in her heritage. As a descendent of the VonCanons and Banners, two of Banner Elk’s founding families, Mary says her paternal ancestors, the Guignards, were French Hugenots who came to South Carolina from France in the early 1700s, before making their way north. Mary was born within site of her current home in Banner Elk, and raised on farmland, which her family has owned for generations, encompassing “400-500 acres,” she says. “We grew typical vegetables, a lot of cabbage and potatoes, and we also raised sheep and cattle,” Mary says. “My father was diversified, you might say; he also worked in lumber and owned and operated the cheese factory. He won an award for his cheese at the Chicago Fair in 1922.” Mary has a keen memory of those early years, and growing up in the preDepression era; she remembers that everyone worked hard for what they had and that nothing was wasted. Due to her father’s vast skills and interests, the Guignard family moved around often when Mary was young, living in Caldwell County, as well as Tennessee and Florida, where her father and other relatives worked in the citrus business.
At 104, Mary Elder remains a beloved matriarch of Banner Elk, a respected High Country citizen and historian. Photo by Sherrie Norris
“Banner Elk was always considered our home,” she says. “Regardless of where we lived, I spent every summer of my youth right here.” Mary was the only girl in the family, growing up with four brothers. “Our oldest brother died before I was born,” she says; her youngest died during a bridge collapse in South Carolina, after returning home from World War II. She remembers a pleasant childhood, for the most part, but clearly recalls when, at age 12, she was in a terrible accident. “We lived in Happy Valley. I was one of about three girls who attended the mostly all-boys school at Patterson,” she says. “They trucked us up to Grandfather Mountain on the Yonahlossee Road for a camping trip; on the way back, about five miles south of Blowing Rock, we wrecked. One boy was killed. They took us all to the hospital, but most of us were released the next day.” That was 1922, “a bad year,” she says, in which her grandmother died and her uncle was killed in a train wreck. Mary also attended the Lee’s McRae Institute, “an all-girls boarding school in Banner Elk,” she describes, and was a student at Lee’s McRae the first year it became a junior college (1929). “My mother was at Lee’s McRae the year it became an institute, in 1900,” she says. Mary was “very unhappy,” at LMC, she says, and “finished out” her first year of college at an Episcopal girls’ school in Ohio. While there, she was chosen to assist the woodcarver, an intricate designer from Switzerland, who carved church pews. “That was quite an honor,” she recalls. Returning south, Mary worked as a billing clerk at a textile mill in Burlington, where she met William T. (Bill) Elder on a blind date. They lived and worked in Burlington for several years, during which time they welcomed their first two children, Bill, Jr. and Mary Frances. Their sons, Clifton and John, were later born in Banner Elk, although the family was actually living in Florida at the time. She planned to have her last two children “back home,” she says. “I felt it was safer, as terrible storms occasionally hit the Everglades. Plus, Banner Elk has
always been known for its excellent medical care.” “Bill was an early pioneer in the Everglades,” she says, “He cleared the land to make way for others, and he farmed it, too, before owning his own cattle ranch.” In the early 1950s, while still in Florida, Bill began to purchase large tracts of land on what is now Ski Beech, and the family returned to the Banner Elk area. “Much of that mountain land was being auctioned off, I’m thinking, from unpaid taxes,” Mary says. “Bill asked local banker Bobby Guy to bid for him, thinking no one would try to out-do the banker, and it worked. People thought he was crazy.” Grover Robbins eventually bought most of the mountain, she says, which was developed into the Carolina Caribbean. “Bill kept just enough of it to make sure that our children were taken care of,” she adds. Bill loved the mountain, she recalls. “He spent a lot of time up there. He grew a lot of apples and raised a lot of zucchini,” Mary says. “He tried raising asparagus, too, but I don’t remember how that went. He also had a big barn and a riding ring up there.” Mary enjoyed being a homemaker and caring for her family. “I gardened, canned and made my children’s clothes,” she says. “I’ve always enjoyed working with my hands.” She also loved to cook, “from scratch,” and has evidence of her handiwork and needlepoint throughout her home. The Elders had been married for 60 years when Bill died at the age of 92 in 2001. Toward the end of his life, Mary cared for Bill at home as long as she could, as she had earlier done for her mother, who died at 99. While some life events are but fading memories now, Mary still recalls many defining moments of her century-plus. “It takes me a little while to think things through, but eventually, I’ll get it,” she says.” Mary has a unique sense of humor, enjoys visitors and phone calls — several of both in the course of a day. She still lives in her family home, one that was begun by her grandfather in 1860 and finished after the Civil War. Today, the historic dwelling stands strong
and is still filled with reminders of the past. The “home-place” has been the setting for many special occasions, including weddings and reunions, she says, “an inviting place” to which the family always returns.
Like family, faith has always been important to Mary. “My parents were Episcopalian,” she says. “I was baptized in the parlor of this house. I’m a Presbyterian now, and helped organize a Presbyterian Church in Florida — but I’ve have been a longtime associate member of the Methodist Church in Florida, too.” A positive outlook has been key to her longevity, Mary says. “There’s no need to be negative. Whatever happens, happens; it’s the way you handle it that matters.” Only in the last two years has she required assistance with her daily care. . “I get along all right,” she says. “I’ve had a few falls, but not break-up falls, just enough to be aggravating.” She eats anything she wants, she said, and loves grits, citrus and sweets — especially chocolate. She is fond of her physician, David Kimmel, but says, “I really haven’t needed him for much. I just take one (thyroid) pill a day.” She says she has “some glaucoma,” and “a little heart trouble,” and is “a candidate” for a pacemaker, “but I don’t want it and I’m not gong to have it.” Mary watches some television — “but there’s nothing good on it and the news upsets me,” she says. “We are living in a treacherous time.” And about politics? “I wish I could just shut it out of my mind,” she says. Mary remains a beloved matriarch of Banner Elk, a respected citizen and historian, proud mother of four, grandmother of eight, and great-grandmother of four. In 2011, she served as the grand marshal for the Independence Day parade in Banner Elk,” — a nice gesture, she called it, “And I really enjoyed it.” “I’ve had a good life,” she says. “That just about sums it up.”
sherrie norris Editor, All About Women
DECEMBER 2014
17
highcountrycourtesies
The Art of Holiday Gift Giving and Receiving “It isn’t the size of the gift that matters, but the size of the heart that gives it.” — “The Angels’ Little Instruction Book” by Eileen Elias Freeman
The tradition of exchanging gifts can be an enjoyable aspect of celebrating the holiday season, but it can also be a frustrating challenge. Finding the perfect gift for those on our lists, negotiating workplace gift exchanges, dealing with unexpected gifts and managing the expense on a limited budget can tax our energies and our attitudes. As you focus on showing you care this holiday season, consider the following gifting tips. Start by considering the individual’s tastes, activities and personal likes. Next, spend only what you can afford to spend. Do not allow yourself to think or feel that you need to reciprocate with a gift of equal value; choose the most appropriate gift you can give within your means. When financial constraints prevent you from shopping like the big spender you would like to be, use your ingenuity. Homemade gifts of food or handmade gift items are unique reminders of your talents and of your efforts for the receiving party. Add personal touches to the gifts like special wrapping or a handwritten note. When you have no budget, say with your words and cards what you would like to express with a gift. A charitable donation to a deserving organization or needy individual — made in the name of a friend who has everything — may be the perfect gift. Our gifts should reflect the level of intimacy we share in our relationship with the person. Avoid anything of a personal nature for someone outside your inner circle of family and friends (i.e. lingerie, cologne, weight loss clinic certificates.) For work situations, check the guidelines of previous years. For your boss/supervisor, consider a simple holiday card or a group gift such as a gift certificate to his or her favorite restaurant, or tickets to an event that you are certain would be appreciated. If you wish to give a gift
to select coworkers, do so in private. All gifts to coworkers should be neither too personal nor expensive. Gift cards have gained more acceptance as an appropriate form of a gift as they have grown in popularity. A gift card to a favorite local merchant, restaurant, movie theater or coffee shop is both thoughtful and practical. It is acceptable — and often appreciated — to enclose a gift receipt with a purchased gift. Including the gift receipt says that the recipients should feel comfortable exchanging the gift if your selection is not right for them. The topic of re-gifting provokes lots of jokes and stories. To avoid any embarrassment when you would like to “pass along” a gift, be sure the gift is brand new, in its original packing with everything intact. Go outside your inner circle. Rather than call it a gift, honestly share that you received it as a gift and thought that they may like/be able to use it. The re-gifting of family heirlooms or mementos of special sentimental value to other family members is absolutely appropriate.
for thank you notes, a handwritten note is preferred for more formal situations, or when responding to older generations. Remember, the attitude with which we give and receive is much more important than the gift. May you all enjoy a healthy and cheerful holiday season giving of yourselves and appreciating all thought around you.
Sharon Carlton Sharon Carlton ©2014 Sharon Carlton writes and speaks on modern etiquette and life skill topics. She encourages others through High Country Courtesies Dining Etiquette and Customer Service Workshops. Contact her at sharoncarlton@charter.net
A trusted name when you need that helping hand
Receiving Gifts Whenever you are given a gift, graciously thank the giver for his or her thoughtfulness. Should someone surprise you with an unexpected gift, express a sincere “Thank you.” You need not feel self-conscious that you do not have one for them, nor do you need to reciprocate. A timely handwritten thank you note completes the gift-giving tradition. For gifts received in person where the giver was personally thanked, a thank you note is not mandatory, but is an extra response of gratitude. When the recipient is unable to thank the giver in person, a handwritten thank you note is in order. Although the younger generation is utilizing e-mail and texting modes
828.963.8233 www.apphomecare.com DECEMBER 2014
19
Glenda Treadaway helping to empower others
It’s safe to say that Glenda Treadaway is a huge fan of Appalachian State University. Currently the Dean of the College of Fine and Applied Arts, not only has ASU provided her a rewarding and growing career for the past 20 years, and not only is she a season ticket holder for football and men’s and women’s basketball, but she ranks ASU third in her most valued aspects of life.
“The things important in my life, for me, are God, No. 1,” she says. “No. 2 would be my family. Then, No. 3 is Appalachian State. Some people may think that’s high, but I mean Appalachian broadly, in that I have the same values that Appalachian promotes, which is giving students a transformative experience.” Glenda’s drive to shape students stems from her own college transformation that came when she joined her college debate team.
Throughout her career, says Glenda Treadaway, she has been a ‘rarity’ in terms of her gender.
20
DECEMBER 2014
Photo by Yozete “Yogi” Collins
’
The daughter of a Southern Baptist minister, Glenda grew up with her twin sister and their brother in a very traditional home where women were expected to be quiet — rather than to be groundbreakers. But even though her parents’ gender expectations were very traditional, her parents wholeheartedly supported their kids’ dreams, even if they didn’t quite understand them. “They always taught us that we could be and do anything we wanted, and that gender shouldn’t hold us back,” she says emphatically. Debate provided Glenda the tools to use her voice to be heard and drove her to get her masters and doctorate degrees in communication, setting the course for her career. “I discovered that people would listen,” she says. “It empowered me to realize that I did have something to say, that I could be persuasive, and I could advocate for myself and for others. That’s just a real empowering feeling.” As she sought to inspire others via teaching communication and coaching debate teams, she, like many women, found herself challenging the gender gap. “Throughout my career I’ve been a rarity in terms of my gender,” Glenda says. “When I first started coaching debate, you could count the number of women (debate coaches) in the country on two hands. Then, when I was pregnant with my child, men would ask me, ‘What are you going to do now?’ We travelled 16 weekends a year and I guess they just thought I couldn’t do that once I had a child. But, I told them, ‘I’m going to coach debate.’” The exchange, however, prompted her to question why the men she worked with weren’t asked their plans when they became fathers. Further, when she found the debate organizations unwilling to work with customary scheduling requests, once she began bringing her child (along with a babysitter) with her to tournaments, she set out to make the debate arena more female and family friendly. “I decided, that in order to change things, I needed to become a leader in the organizations, so I became the president of both national organizations back-toback,” she says. “During my time as either vice-president or president of Pi Kappa Delta and the Cross Examination Debate Association, we implemented bylaws to
‘Empowering others is rewarding thing to do,’ says Glenda Treadaway, who also knows that it must start from within to be affective. protect members from sexual and gender discrimination and harassment, as well as changing the name from a fraternity to an honor society. The moves opened it up for more women and allowed parents to include family as part of their work environment,” she says with a smile.
To go to those lengths, family is clearly important to Glenda. She and her husband Ed, married for 25 years, have a grown daughter, Kimberly; as the couple looks toward retirement, they hope to do more of the camping and riding motorcycles they’ve enjoyed together for years. But for now, Glenda, who eight years ago became ASU’s first “true female academic dean” with faculty that reported to her, she spends the bulk of her time overseeing the 170-plus employees and numerous budgets of the six departments that comprise ASU’s College of Fine and Applied Arts. While she loves the challenges of the job, she misses the daily interaction with students that teaching provides. “I spent most of my career coaching debate and teaching young women and men how to make persuasive arguments and advocate for causes they believed in,” she says proudly. “Empowering people, to me, is a very rewarding thing to do.” Yozette ‘Yogi’ Collins Mom, television producer/writer, and obsessive internet researcher. Though her name suggests otherwise, she is not (yet) an actual yogi.
DECEMBER 2014
21
mom’sworld
Winter Babies After the nearly nonexistent seasonal transition here in the High Country, winter seems to blow in with her fierce winds and snow to take her throne for the next six months, almost as if she had been here all along. Despite the usual grumbles of whether the roads are paved, power goes out, or if school is canceled, her boldness is simultaneously disruptive and beautiful. And then, there are those storms that decide to make her presence that much more memorable, as they persuade new life to make an entrance, as well.
22
DECEMBER 2014
Any midwife or obstetrical provider will tell you that weather fronts and changes in barometric pressure do seem to coincide with more women calling with their water broken or in labor. Maybe it’s that baby that is hemming and hawing, contemplating the warmth of his or her mother versus the readiness to meet these people that have been talking to, patting, and encouraging, sometimes for days or weeks. The drama of the storm certainly seems to add an exclamation point to the whole affair, as “tellings” of the birth story years later demonstrate.
This morning was one of those mornings. It had been prefaced by a few days of the local weather forecasters’ predictions. Of course, I got my information from my children’s bus driver, Mr. Bill, who keeps me abreast, almost always accurately, of the latest weather. As I stood in the doorway of the open bus door as my kids took their seats one morning, he said, “Well, how much snow do you want?” I shook my head, “None,” I sighed heavily, and admitted to him that I just wasn’t quite ready for it, even though I knew that this was no new phenomena,
getting the first real snow of the season in October. I wasn’t adjusted yet. I had just been enjoying the lovely feeling of running in weather that felt not too hot and not too cold. I had just returned from a conference in a lovely sunny place and really felt like summer had just ended, since I had just washed and put away T-shirts, shorts, and sundresses from my trip. Mr. Bill smiled and paused as he said, “Well, it’s probably gonna be a good one. I think we’ll get a fair amount.” The door closed, and I hoped the weather predictions and Mr. Bill were all wrong. So, back to my morning. I awoke, looked out the window and saw the snow-covered branches and the ground covered. I lay contemplating the day’s events, when my phone rang. A woman’s voice mentioned something about always needing an adventure and that her water had broken. Her contractions were not that painful, she said, but she did have “a lot of pressure.” Given that it was not her first baby and the weather was not good, I instructed her to come to the hospital. She mentioned that her husband was cleaning out the car; I flashed back to my husband making coffee and me dilly-dallying in the garage looking for the CD player, almost 11 years ago, not realizing that I was starting a fast and furious labor that would end within an hour of beginning. “Get in the car,” I said firmly. There was some more talk, and I reiterated again, “Get in the car and come on in.” She agreed, and I hung up. After quickly dressing and informing my kids and husband of my new plan for my morning, I started warming up my car, found my gloves, and called the hospital to give the nurse a heads-up. The roads were slick, and I found myself forcing myself to slow down, despite my internal desire to get there as quickly as possible, even though I knew I would make it there before my patient. She came shortly after me, and there was that moment to take a good, deep breath and realize that we had all made it “in time.” She settled into a labor pattern that intensified over the next hour and a half — and coped beautifully. As she hit transition, she kept remarking how incredulous she was about how rapid her labor was, although thankful, and then another contraction would
Any midwife or obstetrical provider will tell you that weather fronts and changes in barometric pressure do seem to coincide with more women calling with their water broken or in labor. Maybe it’s that baby that is hemming and hawing, contemplating the warmth of his or her mother versus the readiness to meet these people that have been talking to, patting, and encouraging, sometimes for days or weeks. - Heather Jordan
come. Her breathing and composure were remarkable, and her husband a fantastic support, reminding her to “be at peace.” Quickly, her awareness of a need to push hit, and we assisted her back to the bed. Within minutes, her beautiful daughter was born. The room was elated and marveling at this once again miracle, all her own person, making her entrance the exclamation point of the day. She nursed almost immediately, and the warmth of the moment certainly contrasted the cold weather outside. After it was all over, I reflected on how my process of accepting the entrance of winter was similar to a woman accepting the onset and crescendo of her labor.
There is beauty in it, even if there are also hang-ups. While people might pout a bit about the snowflakes coming, the mountains and trees just accept nature’s declaration of winter, just as my patient accepted her daughter’s declaration of life. So, next time I find myself wishing away a snowstorm, I’m going to try to remember the beauty in all things and what joy and peace there is in the gentle birth of a winter baby.
heather jordan, CNM, MSN Comments or questions? 828.737.7711, ext. 253 landh@localnet.com
DECEMBER 2014
23
youngatheart
24
DECEMBER 2014
My Favorite Things For years, I have been wrapping all of my holiday gifts, well, actually all gifts, in brown Kraft paper. There is something clean and easy about it that I have always liked. No need for birthday wrapping paper, Valentine’s wrapping paper, Christmas wrapping paper, etc. — I simply use brown paper for everything. I have wrapped so many gifts in this manner that it has become a bit of a trademark – one which makes it impossible to participate in any Secret Santa gift exchanges. I had never given much thought to how I became stuck on this particular giftwrap style. Recently, however, I had an “ah ha” moment. I was watching an episode of my favorite British chat show, “The Graham Norton Show,” and Dame Julie Andrews was a guest. The conversation eventually turned to her iconic role of Maria, in the 1965 movie musical, “The Sound of Music.” “Brown paper packages tied up with strings,” I exclaimed in astonishment. “The Sound of Music,” one of those rare timeless classics, continues to delight audiences young and old. Cliché, but true. I have seen the film countless times and know many of the songs by heart. Among these is the gem, “My Favorite Things.” Maria sings of her favorite things, including the above mentioned brown paper packages. Clearly, I am yet another innocent victim of a Rogers and Hammerstein plot to brainwash the masses into brown-paper-gift-wrapping-mania. And, now that I think about it, I also have the occasional desire to climb a mountain, spin around in circles and sing about the hills being alive, and so forth; therefore, there may be additional evidence to support this brainwashing theory. Joking aside, having this epiphany made me pause and consider what would make my list of favorite things. So,
without further ado, and with apologies to Rogers and Hammerstein, I present my personal version of “My Favorite Things:”
Girly tea parties and big hats with feathers, Star Wars and Buffy and Lord of the Rings, These are a few of my favorite things.
Travels with Roger to white sandy beaches, Spicy Thai curries and grilled summer peaches, Enjoying a bowl of red bean ice cream, These are a few of my favorite things.
Lemony perfumes and Martini glasses, Visits to New York and Subway passes, Staring in awe at Georges Seurat paintings, These are a few of my favorite things.
Mimosas at brunch and Masterpiece Mystery, Gigantic museums crammed full of history, Creamy white pearls set in beautiful rings, These are a few of my favorite things. Dark chocolate truffles and dusty old bookshops, Duran Duran songs and dancing to synth pop, Laughing so hard I might split at the seams, These are a few of my favorite things. When my feet ache, When my brain’s numb, When I’m grumpy and tired, I like to ponder the things that I love, So that I can feel inspired! Sky-high stilettos and warm cashmere sweaters,
Swimming in summer and tiny blue lizards, Dreaming of somewhere without any blizzards, Palm trees and sunsets and Ting with a Sting, These are a few of my favorite things. When my feet ache, When my brain’s numb, When I’m grumpy and tired, I like to ponder the things that I love, So that I can feel inspired!
I don’t know about you, but just thinking about all of my favorite things makes me feel like singing! Feel free to sing along.
heather brandon Considers life to be one big anthropological field experience. She observes and reports. She enjoys travel, food and wine and adventures with her husband, Roger.
®
follow us on at chick-fil-a of boone 828-264-4660 • 2082 Blowing Rock Rd • Boone, NC • www.cfarestaurant.com/boone/home
DECEMBER 2014
25
An “old-timey� Christmas with Jo Rhetta Gardner starts early in the season with decorating and baking holiday goodies, which she loves to share with others. Photo by Sherrie Norris
with
Jo Rhetta Gardner Jo Rhetta Gardner loves all holidays, but Christmas is her favorite. It’s all about giving, she says, and spending time with family. “And, of course, remembering the true meaning of Christmas — the birth of our Savior.” Jo Rhetta starts early in the season decorating her beautiful, 100-year-old home — and making her lists, not only for gifts, but also for all the delectable dishes, desserts and holiday goodies that she prepares each year. Known for her many talents, and especially her culinary skills, Christmas allows this innovative wife, mother and grandmother to showcase some of her family favorites, which always include a unique fruitcake recipe, peanut butter fudge and carrot cake. And, that’s just the beginning, or should we say, the perfect ending. It’s a treat for Jo Rhetta to welcome her family to the historic home that she shares with her husband, Jimmy Gardner; once belonging to the Ray family in Newland, the Gardner home sets peacefully on a hillside above the county seat and is always decorated with a nostalgic, traditional theme for Christmas. Each room evokes a sentimental feeling for those who enter, a feeling of simple yesterdays for which many of us yearn. The Gardners’ love for antiques is obvious, as well as their talents in restoring treasured items.
Their home lends itself to a welcome retreat for family and friends. “All my family gathers at my house every year,” says Jo Rhetta. “I don’t remember ever missing a Christmas without my sisters and brother, which is pretty amazing, considering our ages.” Now, with six grandchildren that she loves to spoil, she says, Christmas Eve is an especially endearing time for Jo Rhetta. “My husband — who is also my best friend — and I, gather with just our kids and grandchildren for a special time together. It’s something we’ve done for many years.” She is up early on Christmas morning, when the cooking begins. By 1 p.m., their designated time to eat, 25-30 family members, and sometimes, friends who join them, are ready to sit down for their Christmas feast together. But, long before that time, however, JoRhetta has made her list, organized her kitchen with all the ingredients she needs, and as she makes each dish, she checks it off the list. “I try to keep the list for the next year,” she says, which works well. “There is usually something that individuals expect to see on the table, and if it is left out, there would be a disappointed face — and I don’t want that.” Jo Rhetta loves a white Christmas, but she doesn’t wish for it very hard. “My sisters, Pam and Margo, have forgotten how to drive in the snow and Christmas
wouldn’t be the same without them,” she says with a chuckle. Yes, her heavy-laden tables are always a hit, but also the decorations. “I love to decorate for Christmas, “ she says. “I have a huge tree in the living room, a smaller one in the dining room and every other room in this old house.” She has a large collection of nativity sets and loves to display them every year. “I have collected vintage ornaments and decorations over the years, too, so you can imagine, my house is full.” For many years, the exterior of the Gardner home was equally adorned in holiday splendor and twice was named “Best Decorated House in Newland.” The hardest thing about decorating, Jo Rhetta says, is taking it all down after Christmas. “It is all so warm and beautiful, I don’t want it to end.” When asked about her favorite Christmas memories, she responds, “Of course, some of my favorite memories are being surrounded by family and friends, and when Christmas falls on Sunday, it just makes it really special to go to church that morning. When our kids, Jim, Misty and Brandon were small, we would put together big wheels, bicycles and such, but I always wrapped a few presents for them and put under the tree before Christmas.” Years later, she says, the children confessed to unwrapping the presents to see what they got and then rewrapping them. “Jimmy and I were clueless,” she says with a laugh.
Continued on next page
At left, Jo Rhetta Gardner enjoys painting paper mache boxes, stenciling with sand and wax, and giving the finished products as gifts,” she says. She often donates them to for fundraisers— and usually adds in her famous peanut butter fudge. At right is a simple, but elegant little tree adorning a corner of Jo Rhetta’s kitchen. Photos by Sherrie Norris
No stranger to pain and loss, Jo Rhetta recalls difficult times, as well as the joyous. “My youngest sister, Kathy, and I have boys the same age,” she says, “and in 1983, she came to my house with her little boy who was 4, and we took them trick-ortreating together. That was the only time we had ever done that together — and it was our last.” Two days later, Kathy and her husband were killed in a car accident, leaving their small son behind. “Even after all these years, it makes me teary-eyed to remember that time,” Jo Rhetta says. “She was such a treasure. I’ll always remember our first Thanksgiving and Christmas without her and the emptiness we all felt.” Much earlier, on Dec. 22, 1962, Jo Rhetta’s father died. “He was buried on Christmas Eve,” she recalls. “I was the oldest of five kids. My brother, Ernest and my sisters Margo, Pam and Kathy, couldn’t remember a lot about him, but I was almost 9 and have a lot of good memories of him. I always felt like I was his favorite, probably because I was the oldest, but he made me feel special.” Jo Rhetta often wonders how her mother made it through losing him. “She had never worked or had a drivers license,” she says. “I am sure her faith pulled her through that time.” Jo Rhetta’s Christmas wish this year is simple: “That my family has good health and happiness,” she says. “My husband, Jimmy, had bladder cancer, and my youngest son, Brandon, at age 31 had carcinoid cancer, stage III, in 2011. He has
28
DECEMBER 2014
a wonderful wife, Star, and two children, Branson, 6, and Braylin, 4.” “Jimmy’s last check-up showed that he is still cancer free,” she says. “Brandon continues to fight his cancer and follows up at Vanderbilt Ingram Cancer Center in Nashville.” Her kitchen, her domain Jo Rhetta loves to bake, bake and bake, she says. Among her favorites is a fruitcake recipe shared with her by a dear friend, Cindy Woody. “I have never cared much for fruitcake,” she says. “You usually love it or hate it, but I tweaked the recipe to my liking.” Apparently, many other people like it, too, as she usually makes 40-50 of them annually to give away, most by special request. “My friend, John Wilson, who recently passed away, always loved my fruitcake,” she says. “He often traded me a jar of his honey, and sometimes biscotti, for a fruitcake. He always said that I made the best fruitcake this side of the Mississippi. I’m going to miss that this year.” Requested even more so than her fruitcake is her peanut butter fudge, a recipe that she came up with, she says, many years ago. “I have made so much of it that I haven’t looked at the recipe in years,” she says. From the beginning Jo Rhetta King was born at Sloop Memorial Hospital in Crossnore and lived in Spruce Pine until the sixth grade. “After my dad died, my mother remarried,” she
says, “and it was an unhappy relationship for her and for us.” Needing to escape the relationship, her mother took her children to Grandfather Home for Children in Banner Elk. “She was able to work there, so she could stay there with us,” she says. “A few years later, Mother met and married a man named Grover who also worked there. We all loved him. He was a good man to my mom and to us kids.” The couple later retired and moved back to Spruce Pine. “Grover passed away in 1978,” she says. ‘He helped me buy my first car, a great red Volkswagen.” Her mother died in 1995. Jo Rhetta graduated from Avery County High School and from Mayland Community College’s cosmetology program. She later returned to Mayland, while working full time at Medi-Home Care, and took night classes for two years to complete core classes in the nursing program. When Jo Rhetta’s granddaughter, Maddie, came to live with her and Jimmy, she had to make important choices, she says, and chose family as her priority. With an interest in healthcare, JoRhetta had started working with Medi Home Care in 1995 and remained there until just last year. “I started out as a service technician, delivering durable medical equipment to every corner of Avery and Mitchell counties,” she says. “I eventually moved to customer service, and then into management as location manager and marketer.” She “found out in a hurry,” she says, that she loved working with the elderly. “I made many friends that touched
volved in constructing the playground at Cannon Hospital. “I remember it being a fun experience and we all enjoyed getting out of the office and helping the community,” she says. In 2012, she was presented the Grandmother of the Year Award by Life Care Center of Banner Elk, followed earlier this year with the HCCF’s Relatives as Parents Award. Hobbies
Jo Rhetta Gardner and her husband, Jimmy, who she calls her best friend, have been married for 38 years and love spending their Christmases with each other and with family and friends. Photo submitted
my heart forever,” she says. “Patients were always priority and my staff was trained that way.” Watching her mother and stepfather struggle to pay bills, buy medications and eat in their later years, she says, helped her better understand the struggles that the senior population faces. She had a special rapport, also, with her staff. “I felt like I raised some of them over the years, and watched them marry and have babies. They were like family to me,” she says. In 2013, she was given the opportunity to change careers. “It was a huge decision to leave Medi Home Care to move to Gentiva Home Health and Gentiva Community Care,” she admits. “Home health was new to me, but very similar to what I was doing. I am still working toward the same goal, which is keeping people at home where they want to be and helping our elderly community stay strong.” Recently, Jo Rhetta helped with Gentiva’s 10th annual food drive and raised more than 800 pounds of food for Volunteer Avery. “We couldn’t have done it without Newland’s Boy Scout Troop 888,” she says. “They volunteered on their own to help, and we are very appreciative.” “I love working for Gentiva and have made many new friends to add to my list of old friends,” she says.
Community service Jo Rhetta has participated in various aspects of community service through the years. Along with her friend, Brenda Reece, she became involved in a “memory walk” in Boone, which lead to forming the High Country Caregivers Foundation, a nonprofit organization that provides respite opportunities for caregivers in the High Country. “We have been friends since 1999 when I began working at Cannon,” says Brenda Reece. “Jo Rhetta is one of the most kind, generous and hard working women I know. When someone needs a helping hand, she is the first to step up and offer one.” Referring to Jo Rhetta as a co-founder of HCCF, Brenda adds, “She has been instrumental in its success over the years and has assisted with numerous fundraisers through the years. She has been a big part of advocating and helping area caregivers.” Through her healthcare role and with HCCF, Jo Rhetta has worked closely with the Avery Senior Center by hosting health fairs, bingo games and senior education; she also helped start the Cancer Resource Center at Cannon Memorial Hospital. She has also been actively involved in Avery County Relay for Life, which has a special place in her heart due to her own family members’ diagnoses. Jo Rhetta and her staff were also in-
Jo Rhetta readily admits her love for scrapbooking and journaling, as well as transforming old worn books into something new. “I also enjoy painting paper mache boxes, stenciling with sand and wax, and giving the finished products as gifts,” she says. “I have also given them to different fundraisers to auction — and usually add in my peanut butter fudge.” As earlier mentioned, one of Jo Rhetta’s “biggest passions,” she says, is collecting antiques. “I am just about out of room, but somehow, I always manage to find another spot for a treasure I can’t live without,” she says. “I can thank my friends, Don and Jan Holdren, for my love of antiques.” Overall, Jo Rhetta describes her life as one that’s been filled with blessings. “I am thankful for my family, my career, my friends — and most of all, God’s love,” she says. “I try to approach everyday with an open heart and love for everyone.” sherrie norris Editor, All About Women
One of many Christmas displays in the Gardner home. Photo by Sherrie Norris DECEMBER 2014
29
Styling at the office
T
he way a woman should dress for an interview is
definitely a hot topic of conversation these days — and opinions do vary on the subject. I’m not at all surprised. Having spent the past few years dressing for different industries — from retail to athletics — I know that interview attire is not “one size fits all.” Whether we like it or not, “fashion matters” when it comes to landing your dream job. When trying to decide what to wear to a job interview, you know that you want to fit in, but also stand out — which can be a challenge. These days, there’s more to dressing for an interview than 50 shades of gray, and it varies by industry and company and— as superficial as it seems— what you wear to an interview is crucial, despite the fact that we’d all like to think our resume speaks louder than our pencil skirt. First impressions are critical. What you wear is the first thing people see, before you say a word. Hiring managers evaluate your appearance, because they don’t know you yet, and don’t have a lot of background on which to base their opinion. It’s during those first meeting that people “size you up” based on everything from your handshake to your shoes. The interviewer needs to be able to visualize you in the position they’re trying to fill, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you need to
30
DECEMBER 2014
show up in something extra-conservative. Instead of opting for the “black suit approach” (assuming it’s better to be safe than sorry), tailor your outfit to the company and industry in which you are interviewing.
the Following are a few tips for helping you choose the perfect attire for a winning interview:
1
Do your detective work. Do you have friends who work at the company where you are interviewing? Ask them what they wear to work every day and about the general feel of the office. Is it a strictly professional atmosphere or more relaxed? Do people dress more uniformly or more creatively? Getting this information first hand is ideal, but not always possible. Second best to getting the inside scoop, is chatting with someone who works at a similar company in the same industry.
2
When in doubt, ask. You’ve likely been corresponding with someone at the company to nail down interview logistics. Instead of sending a separate email or making another phone call, plan to include your questions about aacceptable attire, along with confirming the date, time and location. There is nothing wrong with asking about the dress code.
3
Understand dress codes. The main types of dress codes are business formal, business casual and casual. There are resources available out there to define each one. While there may be a wide range of different “acceptable” within each category, always err on the more formal side of the company’s code. In terms of a casual dress, try to keep it business casual. If interviewing at a fashion related company, consider wearing their brand or mirroring the style of their brand.
4
When you don’t have all the information you need prior to the interview, play it safe. Wear a “flexible” outfit, such as slacks or a skirt paired with a blouse. This gives you the option to bring a blazer along with you and gauge the environment when you arrive in the reception area. If no one else is in a full suit, toss it in your tote. Otherwise, throw it on.
5
Steer clear of the obvious. Regardless of the stated or assumed dress code, there are a few things to avoid
at all cost. Use your best judgement and forget wearing anything short, revealing, ripped, see-through or overly loud/trendy. Not only is this unprofessional, but it will also distract the interviewer. Simply throwing a blazer on over a dress doesn’t make it appropriate for business wear. When dressing for an interview, don’t go straight to that black suit. Present yourself in a professional manner that reflects who you are, and also mirrors the office environment of the company for which you hope to work. We’ve all seen Mark Zuckerberg in his trademark hoodie. Different industries — different rules.
Emily apple Emily Apple is an Appalachian State graduate with a degree in fashion design and merchandising.
‘First impressions are critical. What you wear is the first thing people see, before you say a word. Hiring managers evaluate your appearance, because they don’t know you yet, and don’t have a lot of background on which to base their opinion.’ -Emily Apple
SHOP LOCAL
WINTER HOURS: 10:00 am to 4:00pm Monday - Saturday
Priced at $18 to $42
Shoppes at Tynecastle | 4501 Tynecastle Hwy. • Banner Elk, NC | 828-898-3566 | www.DandeLionStyles.com DECEMBER 2014
31
Emily y Prudden BerthaThreads: Cone ‘Common Dr. Mary MartinWomen Sloop Five Influential Lucy y Morgan g and their Legacies’ Vera Lachmann BRAHM Exhibit
The Blowing Rock Art and History Museum’s latest exhibit, “Common Threads: Five Influential Women and their Legacies,” celebrates the lives
Emily Prudden Riddled with arthritis and nearly deaf since her teens, Emily Prudden traveled from her home in Connecticut to the mountains of North Carolina later in life and founded schools for girls when many southerners were still recovering from the plights of the Civil War. Drawing from her own funds, Emily was instrumental in the beginning of twelve schools in North Carolina and three others in South Carolina before turning them over to a missionary organization or local church. Pfeiffer University, which she founded as Oberlin School on nearby Lick Mountain in 1898, is still standing today in Misenheimer, North Carolina.
of five influential women and their contributions to the High Country over the span of 100 years. These five women (listed chronologically) include Emily Prudden, founder of 12 North Carolina schools, including the Skyland Institute in Blowing Rock; Bertha Cone, Moses Cone’s widow who brought continued success to their estate for 39 years after his death; Dr. Mary Martin Sloop, doctor, educator and founder of The Crossnore School; Lucy Morgan, founder of Penland School of Crafts; and Vera Lachmann, Holocaust survivor Flat Top Manor in Blowing who founded and directed a Rock became more than just camp for boys. a country estate for the Cone Visitors to the exhibit will family. After Moses Cone’s learn about each of these womdeath in 1908, the widowed en individually and explore the Bertha Cone ran the estate commonalities that connect for the remainder of her life, them together through educacontinuing its contributions to tional reform they promoted in employment and innovation, the mountains. The exhibition local agriculture, preservation began on September 13 and of the land, and education of will continue through Jan. 4, the children living there. The 2015. A travel trunk once belonging to Bertha Cone s just one of many treasured items found in manor today is recognized as a the current exhibit at BRAHM. “We are delighted to fully public national park. display an exhibit highlighting these memorable, exceptional women,” says BRAHM Executive Director Joann Mitchell. “Each of them has created a lasting legacy through their work, and we While she preferred for her husband to be called “Doctor,” are honored to share their stories with our community.” Mary Martin Sloop is equally deserving of the title. She was a
Bertha Cone
Mary Martin Sloop
strong Christian leader and educator of her time and founded
32
DECEMBER 2014
The Crossnore School to serve mountain children in need. Poverty was prevalent in the early thirties and local families often averaged a dozen children, many of whom lived and studied at the school. Maintaining a strong relationship with the Daughters of the American Revolution, The Crossnore School continues to serve our region today. After teaching at the Appalachian School in the 1920s, Lucy Morgan led the craft revival in the mountains with the founding of the Penland School of Crafts in 1929. Known then and often referred to today as “Miss Lucy,” she began the Penland Weavers and Potters to provide economic opportunities for women in the local area. Today, Penland encompasses 420 acres and 50 buildings, and more than 1,400 people come each year seeking instruction in a wide variety of artistic practices.
Vera Lachmann A Holocaust survivor, Vera Lachmann came to the mountains with hopes of creating a sanctuary for Jewish boys. The result, Camp Catawba, served as an educational center that taught campers about classical music, theater and drama, and outdoor recreation (including hiking at the Cone estate). Vera would read tales of the Iliad and the Odyssey to the boys in both Greek and English. While the camp closed in the seventies, its influence continues to echo across the mountains to Germany and around the world through the campers who attended.
These items crafted by Lucy Morgan, were part of the Penland School of Crafts in its early days.
The Museum, located at 159 Chestnut Street on the corner of Chestnut and Main, is open 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Tuesday and Wednesday, 10 a.m.-7 p.m. Thursday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Friday and Saturday, and 1-5 p.m. Sunday (closed on Mondays). For
more information, visit www.blowingrockmuseum.org or call (828) 295-9099. Information provided by Blowing Rock Art and History Museum.
IF YOU GO TO THE MUSEUM: Where: 159 Chestnut Street
A few of the medical tools used by Mary Martin Sloop and her husband, Eustace Sloop, as they rovided medical care to people in Avery County in the early 1900s. Photos by Jeff Eason.
on the corner of Chestnut and Main When: 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Tuesday and Wednesday, 10 a.m.-7 p.m. Thursday, 10 a.m.5 p.m. Friday and Saturday, and 1-5 p.m. Sunday (closed on Mondays). Contact: Call (828) 2959099 or visit www.blowingrockmuseum.org. DECEMBER 2014
33
Ashe County’s
hat lady
Willine Smith, left, demonstrates her crocheting technique to her daughter-in-law, Joy Braverman-Smith. Photo by James Howell
During the last three years, Willine Smith has handcrafted and donated hundreds of toboggan-style hats to the military and various charities. What ended up being a large-scale charity effort started as just a way to pass the time. “It started out because I was just wanting something to do,” she says. “Then I got to watching the men across the way that run their dogs, so I made each of them a bright orange hat to wear while they ran their dogs.” The hats were bright orange to ensure hunters wouldn’t mistake the men for animals. “Then, when I got so many, I decided
34
DECEMBER 2014
to give them away,” she says. According to Willine’s daughter-inlaw, Joy Braverman-Smith, she has been responsible for making and donating about 1,000 toboggans in the last three years “At this point, she’s donated to ARC (Ashe Really Cares), the troops, New Beginnings, and anybody else to come that wanted one,” Joy says. “If you see somebody with one of these hats, and they didn’t get it from Walmart, more than likely, it’s from ARC.” Willine says she gets a sense of pride and fulfillment giving her hats to those in need — most of all, crafting the black and camouflage hats for the military.
“Especially the troops,” she adds. “With the troops, I know exactly where they are going. If they asked again, I would do it again.” To make the hats, Willine uses a crocheting technique in concert with a round loom. After reading a few simple instructions, she says, she began looming, mastering the technique as she went along. According to Joy, her mother-in-law has become so proficient with this crocheting technique that she can multitask with ease. “She can be listening with one ear to the TV, listening for the cats to cry, hearing us come in, and with her feet, she’ll
kick a ball and play fetch with the dogs,” Joy says. “She doesn’t even need to look.” Willine and her husband relocated to Ashe County from West Palm Beach, Fla., following their retirement. The two had always liked the area, and had visited several times before their big move. The move was first proposed by the Smiths’ daughter, who asked if they would move to the area if she and her husband would also relocate. After a couple of days talking about it, the family officially decided to relocate. “They came first, and stayed in our mobile home while they were building their house,” Willine said, about her daughter and son-in-law. “Then we stayed in it while our house was being built.” According to Willine, there is a night and day difference between Ashe County and West Palm Beach. “There, you can’t move, hardly; the traffic is terrible, and the taxes are so high you can’t pay them,” she says. “Here, I haven’t met anyone who wasn’t just really nice.” Joy also comments on the differences between their former home and Ashe County. “It was difficult to get to know people unless you joined something,” Joy says about West Palm Beach. “When I first moved here, I didn’t know anybody, and I happened to get into a conversation with another nice human being, which was odd for me. Within 10 minutes, I knew how many kids, and a husband, and how many dogs they had. It was the most amazing concept.” Joy also says her mother-in-law is probably one of the most unique women she’s ever met, and for good reason. Before her retirement, Willine had an eclectic resume of former jobs. She worked in a florist shop, a ceramics shop and was also a school bus driver for seven years. “That’s why my hair’s gray,” she says, about being a bus driver. “I loved every minute of it.” So what’s next for her? “I was thinking about making some hats for the Salvation Army,” she responds. But no matter who will benefit from her next project, Willine is adamant that she plans to continue crocheting into the future. James Howell
Sew Original can make all your sewing wishes come true Don’t forget Men’s Shopping Night! December 9th from 5-7pm
Bernina
880
m adee too create
1542-G HWY 421S, BOONE, NC • (828) 264-1049 • WWW.SEWORIGINAL.ORG
Teresa Cornett is more than a certified fitter of mastectomy products with 29 years experience. She is a caring and sympathetic source of valuable information.
Boone Drug offers: • Breast Prosthesis • Mastectomy Bras (always the latest designs) • Prosthesis for Swimming & Jodee Swimwear • Cranial Prosthesis • Compression Arm Sleeves for Lymphedema
Boone Drug and Healthcare at Deerfield 345 Deerfield Road | 828-355-3343 teresacornett@boonedrug.com
james.howell@mountaintimes.com
DECEMBER 2014
35
Sharyn McCrumb:
‘Nora Bonesteel’s Christmas Past’ Fans of Sharyn McCrumb will be excited to see her first-ever holiday novella on the shelves this Christmas season. Not only does this book feature the joy and nostalgia that surrounds Christmas, it adds to the story of Nora Bonesteel, a McCrumb readers’ favorite. Intertwining two narratives, Nora Bonesteel works to unravel the mystery of a neighbor’s difficulty in decorating for Christmas, while Sheriff Spencer Arrowood spends Christmas Eve using neighborly intentions to arrest the right person. In a recent interview with All About Women, Sharyn describes Nora as a strong, generous woman who reminds readers of their grandmother. “Her willingness to help anyone unhappy or in need — even the dead.” results from her gift of “sight” — her ability to see the past and converse with those of a previous time. Sharyn describes Nora’s gift and the thread of supernatural “knowing” that occurs in many of her novels as “magical realism — the blurring of the line between the supernatural with the equal acceptance of both — it is an element I found in the mountain culture, and I reported what I saw.” In previous Ballad novels, “Nora compares her ability to trying to listen to AM radio while driving at night,” Sharyn says. “Snatches of conversation may come in clearly for a couple of seconds, and then you lose the signal; she gets ‘flashes’ — garbled messages from another time.” This unique ability is found again in Sharyn’s novella. Nora’s careful, loving na-
36
DECEMBER 2014
ture will remind readers of their affection for her as she works to help her Florida neighbors soothe the spirits they seem to have upset with their tropical Christmas decor. Through her memories of Christmas’s past in her neighbors’ home, readers will learn more about Nora as a young girl and her life during World War II. A delicate subject, Nora approaches those who are new to the area carefully. She describes, “A lot of strange things seem to happen in these mountains that wouldn’t happen anywhere else.” And later in the novella, “Yes, people like to know the reasons for things. It makes them feel better.” Challenging her insight, her neighbor asks, “What exactly is it that you do, Miz Bonesteel? Do you lay out cards, or look at a crystal ball, or do you light candles and chant? Just what do you do?” Nora responds, “Nothing.”
This inexplicable ability to “see” things before they happen, or to explain intentions of the spirit world, are gifts readers have come to love in previous ballad novels. Sharyn says, “Nora Bonesteel is more real to a great many people than I am. This book is my Christmas present to many devoted readers.” On Oct. 6, Appalachian State University welcomed Sharyn and “Legend Lady,” Charlotte Ross, as they launched the release of Sharyn’s latest work. Through a series of discussions from both, they described their unique working relationship, their love for the Blue Ridge Mountains and its stories, and their passion for Appalachian culture. In a chance meeting at an Appalachian Studies conference in the early 1980s, Sharyn listened to several of Charlotte’s stories, and determined that the “streak of the supernatural that runs deep
through mountain families belongs in stories about Appalachia,” she says. Thus, began a dynamic friendship that resulted in the creation of Nora Bonesteel, as well as several years of storytelling, creating and writing. Long-time fans of Nora will once again revel in her story and her insights throughout the holiday season. Wrap up and enjoy this story while sipping hot cocoa near a welcoming, crackling fire in the glow of your family’s Christmas tree.
Hollie Greene Hollie Greene is an English teacher who loves stories, words and the mountains of North Carolina.
About the Author More than 100 years ago, Sharyn McCrumb’s greatgrandfathers were circuit preachers in the North Carolina Mountains. “It is from them,” she says, that she gets her regard for books, her gift of storytelling and public speaking and her love of the Appalachian mountains. Best known for her Appalachian “Ballad” novels, Sharyn has received the Wilma Dykeman Award for Literature, was deemed Best Mountain Writer in 2013, and has been named a Virginia Woman of History and awarded the Mary Hobson prize for Arts and Letters in 2014. A frequent name on the New York Times Bestsellers, Sharyn has also received the AWA Outstanding
Contribution to Appalachian Literature Award, along with several other honors and awards. “My books are like Appalachian quilts,” says Sharyn. “I take brightly colored scraps of legends, ballads, fragments of rural life, and local tragedy, and I piece them together into a complex whole that tells not only a story, but also a deeper truth about the culture of the mountain South.” Most recently, she has published “Nora Bonesteel’s Christmas Past” (Abingdon Press 2014), which she calls her Christmas gift to her many devoted readers. For more information, including readings and events, visit her website at www.sharynmccrumb.com.
DECEMBER 2014
37
marriageandFamilyCorner
‘Tis the season to honor the
Memory ‘Tis the season of peace, hope, joy, merriment and togetherness — for many. However, after the loss of a loved one, the holidays can also be the season of intensified hurt, sadness, anger, loneliness or even a numbing of pleasant and unpleasant feelings. The absence of the loved one may be painfully obvious and distressing during holidays. The way a person feels about the type and quality of support received from family, friends, and community is one of the most influential factors for how well the person will move through grief, or if they will get “stuck.” When a family shares a common loss — biological, by law, or chosen — this support may be mutually beneficial or mutually destructive. Grief, like other difficult life experiences, brings out the best and the worst in people and families. Holidays offer opportunities to purposefully improve these responses. However, negotiating how shared time and spaces will best
38
DECEMBER 2014
meet the needs of the family can be tricky. Through these varying responses, reactions, and opportunities, something new is created for the family and its members. When these responses and reactions include compassion, openness, and respect between members, it is likely to form the new experience as healthy and happy. A compassionate, open, and respectful joint examination of needs — related to these traditions and rituals — includes decisions about how they will be maintained, adjusted or retired. Something new will be created for grieving families by new traditions or rituals or in a new way to handle related conflict. New rituals may be adopted as a response to the change in the family — and the needs of surviving members. One idea for a new ritual to honor the grief journey is to select, make, or buy a special box to hold letters written to the deceased
‘The absence of the loved one may be painfully obvious and distressing during holidays. The way a person feels about the type and quality of support received from family, friends, and community is one of the most influential factors for how well the person will move through grief, or if they will get “stuck.”’ -mary mckinney
loved one during each holiday. Writing these letters will serve as a sort of journal of the grief journey, as it changes across time. If the box is used by multiple family members, a decision can be made whether the letters will be read together — or not. Some family members may feel strongly about maintaining the same traditions and rituals that were always part of holidays with the lost loved one, in order to connect to the spirit of memory of the loved one — and because it is comforting. Some may feel strongly about letting go of (or retiring) those traditions and rituals in the process of moving through grief, and engaging fully in ongoing life, without the deceased loved one. Other family members may feel strongly about creating new traditions and rituals, whether they be completely new, or by incorporating parts of those that were long-held, as a way to honor memory, while creating a new life without that person’s physical presence. Like many things in life, there is not a
“right” way to handle these decisions. The only “wrong” way to handle it would be anything that introduces — or reinforces — damaging patterns of reaction or interaction. An examination of the parts of the lost loved one’s legacy that are especially useful to highlight will assist in this process. For example, remembering a feisty and devoted grandmother may include starting a new tradition of volunteering, as a family, with a cause that was important to her, while wearing silly hats. What fun to volunteer at a homeless shelter, soup kitchen or other nonprofit organization, and share a smile with everyone who enters the doors, each time remembering Granny’s smile and sly giggle. Similarly, the sort of personal legacy that is desired will help with decisions about how to navigate this individual and
family grief journey. That is, if the desired legacy includes compassion, it is necessary to react with compassion to differences among family members — about how to maintain, incorporate or retire holiday traditions and rituals. And, this compassion must be directed toward self and family, even in the face of great pain or conflict. What better way to embody the spirit of Christmas, Hanukkah or other observance? And, what better way to honor the spirit and memory and the best of the legacy of a lost loved one? For comments on this article or suggestions for future articles, contact:
MARY MCKINNEY, MA, LMFT McKinney & Associates Marriage and Family Therapy, Inc. 828-268-0155 For urgent matters and first-time callers: 828-773-5463 www.mckinneymft.com
DECEMBER 2014
39
Photos submitted
Elizabeth Baird Hardy A Powerhouse of Knowledge
The vocation of teaching requires a duality of passion, a love for both subject and student. This powerful combination creates teachers who are enthusiastic, conscientious, and who bring a dynamic presence to their classrooms. Elizabeth Hardy’s intelligence and wit, paired with her engaging charisma make her one of our area’s most treasured resources. “As a teacher, Ms. Hardy knows how to engage her students,” says Meg Hundley, librarian at Avery Middle School. “Because of her extensive knowl-
40
DECEMBER 2014
edge of her subject she immediately draws her students in.” Elizabeth attributes much of her passion for books and scholarship to her parents and the ways in which her imagination was nurtured as a young girl. Born in Berea, Kentucky to a writer and an engineer, Elizabeth’s family’s traveling adventures, paired with her voracious appetite for books, created the literary scholar she has become and furthered her belief that, “if you love something, it will reveal itself to you.” The variety of creative arenas in Eliza-
beth’s world continue to validate this life philosophy. In the classroom, participating in Civil War reenactments, home schooling her two children, presenting information gleaned from careful study with several audiences, or teaching in the classrooms of Mayland Community College, the loves of Elizabeth’s life continue to unveil themselves in remarkable ways. A graduate of the University of Louisville, Elizabeth’s work with college students solidified her desire to teach English at the college level. Uncertain as where to pursue her graduate degree,
Elizabeth spent a summer in Orlando as a puppeteer as part of a Creative Arts Ministry. During that time, she met her future husband, Michael Hardy. Following their Civil War-themed wedding, the couple moved to Western North Carolina and Elizabeth chose Appalachian State University to begin her master’s degree. Upon the completion of her advanced degree, Elizabeth taught at Caldwell College, where she discovered her love for teaching in the community college arena. In comparison with the traditional university student, Elizabeth says, “Both the diversity and commitment of students in the community college enhance the quality of my classroom.” Students here aren’t as worried about being cool — they are eager and ready to learn.” Elizabeth brings a multifaceted approach to the study of literature in her classroom. First is the principle she applies from lessons learned in her study of C.S. Lewis: “repeated reading is a great key to scholarship.” “Read it once and then read it again and again. Examine the terrain of the book — the landscape, the setting, the choices in names, character development — discover what makes a book have meaning and depth,” she says. “In this way, books come alive in her classroom and add layers of complexity to students’ dialogue about required reading.” Former student, Austin Lyons, describes, “As a teacher, Ms. Hardy, is not only an expert in her subject, but she is passionate about helping students understand literature.” In addition to her work in the classroom, Elizabeth’s deliberate study of the “Twilight” series and “The Hunger Games” trilogy have taken her across the country to present her research. In lectures with titles such as “A Token of My Affection: Symbolism in the Hunger Games,” Elizabeth reveals the nuances and intricacies that help shape these books; she exposes the undergirding that binds them together. In essence, as Elizabeth explains, through her research and presentations, “I am investing in something I love and then I get to watch it grow and develop.” This commitment is inherent in her family life, as well. With Michael, now a full-time history writer who also serves as
Elizabeth’s husband, Michael Hardy, is a full time history writer and expert who shares his knowledge with others in a variety of ways.
the chair of the Historical Association of Avery County, Elizabeth homeschools her son, Nathaniel, and her daughter, Isabella. “The greatest joy of my life is reading to my children,” Elizabeth says. As a family, the Hardys participate in Civil War re-enactments and both children frequently attend and assist their mother in lectures and presentations. “It is a delight to have this opportunity to be so involved in what they learn and to let them take part in our lives so that they learn the relevance of knowledge,” Elizabeth says. Reflecting on the nontraditional education Isabella and Nathaniel are receiving, she good-naturedly laughs and says, “I hope this ends up being a good thing, and they don’t think we’re crazy!” In 2004, Elizabeth began teaching at Mayland Community College, where she has taught a variety of courses including freshman composition, writing and disciplines, American and British literature, and Appalachian culture. She says the magic key to meeting students where they are is “what they read, I read.” Likewise, “there’s no use for snobbery about books,” she adds. “Books and stories relate in ways that are essential to our development as compassionate, thoughtful human beings. Books
make connections — you share blood with people when you share a book,” Elizabeth asserts. Further, Elizabeth’s work at Mayland is fueled by her passion for both scholarship and community. “Mayland has always been very supportive of my eccentricities, from leading literary discussions on popular books like ‘The Hunger Games,’ ‘Twilight,’ and ‘Harry Potter,’ to my presentations on storytelling and history, to my coaching a middle school science team. One of the reasons I love teaching here is the focus on community.” Living in the same area as her students allows Elizabeth to “see how MCC affects them positively for the long term,” she says. She also admits, “I am a shameless recruiter, telling anyone who will listen about the advantages of MCC.” Living in Appalachia for the past 19 years, Elizabeth says, “I am an Appalachian person, so the mountains hold me. Michael and I love the area for its beauty, its culture, and its history. Just watching the stars at night is a gift this place gives us to share with our children.” Her love for the area gives Elizabeth a unique perspective and closer understanding of mountain culture and the needs of her students. In regard to her children, she says, “I hope they are learning that we must often seek out and create opportunities that we want to pursue. And that there is beauty in everything around us — whether it is a tree draped in snow, a spider building a web, a dusty photograph that captures a moment from the past, or an old story passed down in a family or kept in a book.” Dressed as Queen Elizabeth, wearing Katniss’s side braid, or in costume as a woman of the Civil War era, Elizabeth Hardy is dedicated to bringing insight, creativity, and scholarship to her classroom and her world. A powerhouse of intelligence, enthusiasm and genuine concern for students and community, Elizabeth Baird Hardy’s brand of scholarship establishes her as one of Appalachia’s most valuable resources.
Hollie Greene Hollie Greene is an English teacher who loves stories, words and the mountains of North Carolina.
DECEMBER 2014
41
Yoga has been shown to have a positive impact upon mind and body — and yes, our hair.
World-renowned yoga instructor and author, Sejal Shah, now makes her home in Boone. Photo submitted
One thing that unites women is our quest for shiny, vibrant and tough hair. Our hair is at its best in the first two decades of our lives when the roots are at their strongest. Hair loss is not a serious health problem, unless associated with particular medical conditions, and losing up to 75100 hairs a day from the body is normal. The main reasons for hair loss include stress, hormonal disorders, aging, bad eating habits, diseases, drugs, using too many hair products, (like hair dyes or chemical shampoos), genetic disorders and smoking. So, relax — finding a few (hairs) on your hairbrush is not necessarily cause for alarm. The thought of thinning hair can cause anxiety in many women because hair is seen as an asset that adds to one’s beauty — and loss of it can even cause low self-esteem in people, especially in youngsters. Excessive use of hair products like shampoos and colors, which contain chemicals, are one of the common causes of thinning and shedding of hair. Hair condition is directly related to your general health. In fact, your hair condition is a direct barometer of your own health. Beautiful hair is truly your crowning glory. Yoga can help to stop hair loss. However it’s very important to understand that yoga can actually help to prevent the condition from the start.
Yoga’s approach to
beautiful hair 42
DECEMBER 2014
Doing yoga and meditation to restrict hair-loss will not only give you healthy hair, but also benefit your whole system. It will improve your all around health, physically and mentally also. Yoga will help enhance circulation of blood in the scalp, improve digestion and reduce anxiety and stress too. This ancient practice can help you have healthy hair and prevent hair loss in a number of ways. All forward-bending postures enhance blood circulation in the head or the crown region. This, in turn, nourishes the roots of the hair and as a result one can observe the changes in the hair over a period of time.
Following are a few recommended postures: Downward dog pose (Adho Mukha Shvanasana) provides good circulation to the head and is also good for sinus and common cold. It is also helpful for mental tiredness, depression and insomnia. Standing forward stretch (Utthanasana) helps in reducing fatigue and tiredness. Good in menopause and also improves digestion. Diamond pose (Vajrasana): Unlike other postures, it can be done immediately after eating your food. It helps in urinary disorders, weight loss, digestion and also reduces gas in stomach. Wind-relieving posture (Pavanmukthasana) reduces gas, and helps digestion. The muscles of lower back are strengthened. It also reduces fat of abdomen and buttocks. Shoulder stands (Sarvangasana and Plough Pose – Halasana) help to nourish the thyroid gland, which means healthy function of respiratory, alimentary, genital and nervous systems.
Beneficial breathing techniques for preventing hair-loss: With shining skull breath, (Kapalbhati Pranayam, a fast breath of forced exhales followed by natural inhales), brain cells receive more oxygen, so it is good for the nervous system, removes toxins from the body and cures
obesity and diabetes. Bellows breath (Bhastrika Pranayam, a vigorous, dynamic, and vitalizing breathing technique) helps remove excess wind, bile and phlegm in the body and purifies the nervous system, preventing all kinds of diseases in the body. Alternate nostril breathing (Naadi Shodhan Pranayam) helps to treat heart problems, asthma and arthritis, depression, migraine, stress and eye and ear problems. Cooling techniques (Sheetali and Sitkari) can help hair loss, which may be caused by pitta imbalance. (Pitta is the energy principle which uses bile to direct digestion and hence metabolism.) Apart from postures and pranayama, meditation can help you to relax and calm down. Eliminating stress with meditation could also help your mind and your hair.
Other things to remember: • Along with doing yoga, looking after your diet is also important. Eating a balanced diet comprising of fresh fruits, green leafy vegetables, pulses, sprouts, cereals and dairy products gives you nutrients important for hair growth. • Washing hair with neem water (from a tropical, evergreen tree that originated in India and often used as a healing and cleansing agent), keeping your hair clean by washing it two to three times a week, massaging hair with coconut oil, and brushing hair regularly is very good for your hair growth. Massaging and allowing the oil to stay overnight before you wash it off could be very beneficial. • Avoid using any harsh chemicals and many styling products for hair. In addition to the above, one must understand that hair loss is a natural process and cannot be reversed, however the process can be restricted or slowed down with the above given tips. However, preventing hair loss with these tips could be smart strategy.
About Sejal Sejal is the founder of Wellness and Life Style Excellence Center (2007-2012), and has been a wellness and yoga teacher for more than a decade in India and the United States. In December 2011, she closed the center and started working with the Art of Living, where she teaches Sri Sri Yoga and Happiness Program. She is member of Yoga Academic Council at Sri Sri University, India. Her graduation in science of Homoeopathy (B.H.M.S., Mumbai University, 1993) created a strong foundation for understanding health, in terms of mind-body-soul state, she says. “Wellness or health is all about personal responsibility, prevention, self care and healing, rather than cure and medicines,” she says. “People need to be educated about wellness and healthy living principles, rather than just treated with medicines.” She is the compiler and publisher of “Spirit of Yoga,” (2009). She writes regularly on yoga and healthy living in various print and digital media. She is contributor on the YOGANONYMOUS blog, one of the Top 10 yoga blogs. Read her Yoga journey on http://artoflivingsblog.com/gurupurnima-2013. She has also started learning Ayurveda, the sister science of Yoga. Sejal may be reached by email at: sejal.shah@artofliving.org. or by calling (909) 645 7103, or visiting her website at Sejal Shah @ SejalShahJGD.
Sejal Shah Sejal Shah is a Sri Sri Yoga Teacher at the Art of Living Retreat Center in Boone
DECEMBER 2014
43
Sherry Greene is a gifted woman known within her family, her
Sherry Greene The farmer’s wife with a passion for life
community and her church as one with many talents and skills. A hairdresser by trade with a passion for life , Sherry is also an incredible cook who rarely opens a box or a package for a quick meal. In fact, the majority of what she puts on the table comes from her well-stocked pantry of home-preserved goods, or from the freezer — from which the contents also came from either her family’s large gardens, or the cattle field. Sherry was a farmer’s daughter while growing up in the 1970s and she is a farmer’s wife today. Cooking is among her specialties, but it’s often what she does before her food reaches the table that astounds most who know her. Sherry’s husband, Bill Greene, grows large gardens every year; Sherry helps harvest the goods and puts everything possible into jars or into the freezer to help her family through the winter. Actually, several families could make it just fine if they had access to the Greenes’ pantry on a regular basis. While Sherry preserves dozens of jars of goods every year, this past gardening season provided enough of every locally grown vegetable and fruit imaginable to preserve 500-plus jars. It’s not just your typical beans, corn and tomatoes weighing down her shelves, but it’s also soups, sauces, juices, sauerkraut, pickles, relishes, pie fillings, and a variety of jams and jellies. What doesn’t fit on the shelves makes it to the freezer, including more corn, broccoli, cauliflower, berries, green peppers and stuffed peppers. “I always freeze gallons of creamed corn in the summer,” she says. “There is never a family function or church gathering that I go to without taking my corn. People seem to love it and it’s another tasty time-saver.” How much of everything she “puts up,” she says, depends on how well the garden grows, and what she is “low on” from the previous year,” Sherry says. “And, since Bill raises cattle, we also put up beef every year and we buy a hog to work up.” As you might have already guessed, yes, there’s canned and frozen meat, in abundance. Continued on page 46
44
DECEMBER 2014
DECEMBER 2014
45
Photos by Sherrie Norris
When asked about her favorite foods, Sherry says, “Anything with tomatoes. I love them, and I prepare a lot of dishes with a tomato base — spaghetti, lasagna, pizza, soups and Sloppy Joes. And, beef is my favorite meat.” Of course,she loves a good chicken dish now and then too, she adds, “And who doesn’t love a wonderful dessert? My canned pie fillings always come in handy for a quick delicious pie when I’m in a hurry.” Sherry especially enjoys sharing food with her family. “Occasionally I will gift some of my canned food to friends and clients at my hair salon,” she said. “ I take food to church and family functions and to the sick and shut-ins. I also try to share with families when there’s been a death in the home, when I can.” Bill always grows more than Sherry can use or prepare, she says, “And we enjoy sharing with others.” Sherry doesn’t like the spotlight and doesn’t take credit for her success. “In high school, I had a nine-week mini-course in home economics, but I already knew how to cook and sew,” she says. “I learned those things by watching my mama, Carolyn Jones, and my Mamaw, Alice Trivette, who is now deceased. They were very patient in letting me help in the kitchen and they seemed to know everything, so I was always asking questions.” She enjoyed spending a lot of time at her mamaw’s while growing up. “She was always in the kitchen, when we were not in the fields working,” she says. “I wanted to be just like her and my mother in all areas of life — they were good women and hard workers. Sherry’s first memory of cooking alone, she says, was when she was about 8 years old. “Mama let me fix a cake of cornbread by myself, and after that, I fixed supper every night and, dinner, too, when mama was working,” she said. Food was always on the table by 5 p.m. “Daddy was so picky and he made me a nervous wreck watching me peel the potatoes,” she says, “He made sure you didn’t waste anything, the peeling had to be paper thin. “ For every meal, she baked cornbread, had potatoes “either mashed or fried” and
46
DECEMBER 2014
It’s not just your typical beans, corn and tomatoes weighing down her shelves, but it’s also soups, sauces, juices, sauerkraut, pickles, relishes, pie fillings, and a variety of jams and jellies. some kind of beans, she says. On the farm, Sherry’s family always grew several acres of tobacco, cabbage, beans and potatoes to sell. “We also had hogs and chickens — and cows that I had to milk. We also raised a garden, for our use, too, so that always meant canning vegetables,” she says. Her dad was also a hunter. “I had to learn early how to fix rabbit, squirrel and deer meat,” she says, “and we always had
farm hands to feed, in addition to my daddy, little sister and brother.” Since her mother worked second shift, it was Sherry’s responsibility to feed everyone dinner, “which most people call lunch, today,” she says, “and/or supper, which is now dinner.” Sherry says she knew from an early age that she ‘needed to know’ how to cook, “so I could survive and be a good wife and homemaker, someday.” She also learned to use a pressure cooker. One incident in particular, will always stand out in her mind. “The summer I was 10, I was cooking fresh green beans in the pressure cooker,” she says. “I did as usual and removed it from the stove when it finished. But, something seemed strange — the steam didn’t come out after I removed the jiggler, so I took it out in the yard to open it. When I did, all the steam, pressure and beans went all over me, giving me severe burns on my face, chest and arms. I didn’t get my ‘nerve’ up to use the pressure cooker again until the next summer.” Years later, she says, “I also learned a lot from my mother-in-law, Mrs. Gladys (Greene). I’m no expert cook, but these women taught me a lot, and now, I do the best I can. They were always just a phone call away if I needed them.” As a tribute to her grandmother, in 2005, Sherry compiled several of her “old-timey” recipes into a little cookbook, called “Alice’s Recipes,” which she considers a great treasure. As a teen in high school, Sherry decided to trade in her home-ec class for cosmetology, “because there wasn’t any time left over for ‘extras,’ and I knew I could make a living doing hair,” she says. Sherry was 17 when she and Bill started dating in the fall of 1977. “Yes, it truly was “love at first sight,” she says. She proved true the old adage that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. “I was cooking for him a long time before we got married,” she says. “When I lived in my apartment, I loved for him to come over for supper.” As time passed, Sherry loved also cooking for her daughter’s friends, and loved enjoyed having them in for dinner, hosting sometimes a dozen or more of the youngsters before “big dances and other special occasions, “ she says.
Now married for 31 years, Sherry and Bill have one daughter, Stephanie, who is married to Josh Hamby, and together, they have three sons — Titus 5, Tilden 4, and Talon, 18months. “Bill and I started raising a garden the first year after we were married,” she says. Sherry also loves to grow flowers. “I remember Bill’s daddy teasing me and telling me I work too hard on something that can’t be eaten,” she says. As a youngster, Sherry knew that
she had a knack for “doing hair,” she says. “Hairstyling is my passion and I’ve been doing hair since I was 16. It’s not only a way to make a living — I have loved every single minute of it.” Early on, neighbors “let” her cut and perm their hair,” she recalls. “Sometimes, on Saturday night, I would go to their house and ‘set’ it for them, so it would be nice for church the next morning. They paid me 50 cents to a dollar.” She didn’t get rich, she says, but she had fun. “My aunt, Kate Johnson, was what they called a beautician, back then,” Sherry says. “ I watched her work and knew that it was what I wanted to do as a career when I grew up. After completing her cosmetology class in high school, Sherry was licensed the summer she graduated in 1978. In the meantime, at 15, she was working at Roses and was waitressing by the age of 16, working for the next eight years at Western Steer. She was also working in a salon “building my client base,” she says, and selling Mary Kay on the side. “I got my first hairstyling job at McGuires Beauty Shop in downtown Boone in 1978,” she says. After working at a few other shops, she opened Total Image Salon in Jan. 1990; before deciding to downsize in 2006, she had up to 12
employees. Following in her mother’s footsteps, Stephanie became a hairdresser and worked with her mother. She is now a cosmetology instructor at Watauga High School. Total Image Salon, which is located next door to the Greene residence north of Boone, will be celebrating its 25th year in January. Sherry still works there 30 hours a week. Some things have changed through the years, Sherry says, but it’s still the basics that matter most of all for this hardworking wife, mother and proud grandmother. Among her favorite scriptures, Sherry says, is that of the Proverbs 31 woman. “I’ve never been able to be that woman, but it’s always been a goal of mine. I truly feel that those important women in my life have lived that — and I always wanted to be that way too.” She loves special occasions and has been anticipating this special season with great joy — and yes, her kitchen is beginning to look a lot like Christmas.
sherrie norris Editor, All About Women
The following recipes are some of the Greene family’s “tried and true,” favorites, says Sherry Greene.
Strawberry Refrigerator Cake “This easy recipe is one of my ‘new’ personal favorites and is perfect for any holiday gathering, party, celebration or just because,” Sherry says. “I always requested a strawberry cake for my birthday growing up — never mind that it was Dec. 31! My mama loved me enough to make one, anyway. Wild strawberries make it even better. 1 Duncan Hines Supreme Strawberry Cake Mix Ingredients listed on back of cake box: eggs, water, oil 2 (10 oz.) boxes frozen strawberries, in syrup
1 cup cold milk 1 (3.5 oz.) box of vanilla instant pudding 1 (8 oz.) container Cool Whip, thawed 1 pint fresh strawberries (tops removed and berries cut in half) 1/3 cup chopped pecans, optional Prepare cake batter (as directed on box); pour batter into a greased 9 x 13-inch cake pan; bake according to directions on box. When done, remove from oven and let it cool completely. Once cool, use handle of a wooden spoon to poke rows of holes in the cake. Place thawed strawberries with syrup into a food processor or blender;
pulse until slushy. Pour strawberry puree mixture over cake and spread it out evenly; letting it soak in. In the meantime, mix 1 cup cold milk with instant vanilla pudding in a bowl until thick. (Pudding directions call for 2 cups of milk, but use just 1 cup.) Fold in thawed Cool Whip. Once pudding and Cool Whip are well combined, spread evenly over top of cake. Place fresh strawberry halves on top of cake frosting; sprinkle on chopped pecans, if desired. Refrigerate for 4 hours. (Pillsbury Cake Mix works just as well.) Continued on page 48 DECEMBER 2014
47
Peanut Butter Balls 2 cups crunchy peanut butter (can use smooth) 1 stick butter 2 cups powdered sugar 2 cups Rice Krispies 2 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips 2 Tbs. shortening, optional (solid shortening like Crisco; cannot substitute butter or margarine.) Melt peanut butter and butter together, either over low heat on stovetop or in microwave. (I do mine 2 minutes in microwave). Mix together powdered sugar and Rice Krispies. Mix sugar and cereal with melted peanut butter and butter. (I just use a wooden spoon to mix them together.) Form into balls about 1-inch in size, or whatever size you like. Cover a baking sheet with wax paper and place peanut butter balls on the sheet; chill in refrigerator for about an hour. Melt chocolate and shortening either on the stove or in the microwave. (I do it in the microwave for about 2 ½ minutes and stir well. Dip peanut butter balls into chocolate and return to cookie sheet. Keep chilled until firm or about an hour. Makes 3 dozen, depending on size. *Note: The addition of shortening creates a smoother consistency than melted chocolate alone, and helps to create a more evenly coated product.
Melt-in-your mouth baked chicken breast 4 boneless chicken breasts 1 cup mayonnaise ½ cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese 1½ tsp. seasoning salt ½ tsp. black pepper 1 tsp. garlic powder Mix mayonnaise, cheese and seasonings. Spread mixture over chicken breast and place in baking dish. Bake at 375° for 45 minutes.
Homemade Pimento Cheese 4 (8 oz.) pkg. cream cheese, softened 1 cup grated sharp cheddar cheese 1 cup grated Monterey Jack cheese ¼ cup mayonnaise ½ tsp. seasoning salt (salt, pepper, garlic) 2 to 3 Tbs. pimentos, drained and smashed 1 tsp. grated onion
48
DECEMBER 2014
Optional: 1/8 tsp. cayenne pepper or ½ a chopped Jalapeno, if you like “heat” Beat cream cheese until fluffy. Add all remaining ingredients and mix well. Store in refrigerator. Note: I make my own ‘house seasoning:” 1 cup salt, ¼ cup black pepper and ¼ cup garlic powder. Mix well and store in an airtight container in a cool dry place.
Ham and Swiss Party Rolls 1 lb. pkg. sliced sandwich ham 1 lb. pkg. sliced Swiss cheese 1 stick butter, melted 3 Tbs. prepared mustard 3 Tbs. poppy seeds 1 Tbs. Worcestershire sauce 1 small onion, grated 3 pkgs. small dinner or party rolls Split rolls in half lengthwise. You can cut the whole pack at once. I also cut the whole pack of ham and cheese to the size of my rolls; it makes it easier to put on the rolls after you spread the sauce. Mix all ingredients together. Spread mixture on both sides of rolls, then put a layer of ham and cheese on each roll. Bake in 350° oven for 10-15 minutes, or until cheese is melted. May be made and frozen ahead of time.
Peanut Butter Pie (Shared with me by my husband’s mother many years ago.)
2 prepared graham cracker piecrusts 1 (8 oz.) cream cheese, softened ¾ cup peanut butter 1 cup powdered sugar 2 Tbsp. milk 1 tsp. vanilla 1 (8 oz.) carton Cool Whip Beat cream cheese and peanut butter together until smooth. Add powdered sugar, milk and vanilla, beat until combined. Fold in Cool Whip. Pour into piecrust. Chill at least 2 hours until set. Freezes well.
Southern Style Beef Tips 3 lbs. beef tips or stew meat Salt and pepper to taste 1 onion, chopped
1 green pepper, chopped 1 can cream of mushroom soup 1 pkg. onion soup mix 2 Tbs. Worcestershire Sauce 3 garlic cloves, minced 2 cups beef broth Mix all together and use one of the following ways to cook. *Slow cooker 8-9 hours on low. *Bake in oven at 300° for 4 hours. *On stovetop in pressure cooker for 30 minutes. If you want more of a gravy consistency, melt 2 Tbs. butter over medium heat; add 2 Tbs. all-purpose flour; cook and stir 1 minute, then slowly stir in ½ cup of the liquid until smooth. Add another cup and stir until smooth. You don’t have to drain the meat, just ladle out enough of the liquid to make your gravy, then return it to the meat.
Christmas Party Pinwheels (shared with me by my mother)
2 pkg. (8 oz.) cream cheese, softened 1 pkg.(4 oz.) ranch salad dressing mix ½ cup red or green peppers, or both, chopped ½ cup celery, chopped ¼ cup chopped onion 3 to 4 (10-inch) flour tortillas *You can also add chopped ham, turkey or beef Mix cream cheese and dressing until smooth, add veggies, and mix well. Spread on tortillas; wrap tightly in a roll in saran wrap. Refrigerate for 2 hours. Slice into ½- inch pieces and serve.
No Bake Oatmeal Cookies (boiled cookies)
2 cups sugar ½ cup milk 1 stick butter 3 Tbs. cocoa 2½ cups quick cooking oatmeal 1 tsp. vanilla ½ cup smooth or ¾ cup crunchy peanut butter Mix and bring sugar, milk, butter and cocoa to a full rolling boil for 1½ minutes. Remove from heat and stir in vanilla, peanut butter and oatmeal; beat well by hand until blended. Spoon onto wax paper or pan sprayed with cooking spray.
BloomWhereYou’rePlanted
A Christmas Gift for Mama My friend, Jean, and I had shopped all day on what had become our annual Christmas shopping spree. But, I had not found a suitable gift for my mother, and we needed to head home. Mama had been sick for several years and confined to bed most of the time. Nothing seemed appropriate for her at this time in her life. She had everything she needed. I looked and looked and nothing caught my eye. I wanted to make her happy with a sweet Christmas surprise. Then, there it was — a beautiful doll named Emily. I saw her as I had walked into the doll section by accident, as I was making my way through the store to catch up with my friend. I bought the doll, but before I wrapped it, I enclosed a note from Emily to Mama - something I think she would have said if she could talk.
Hello, I am so happy to be in your home this Christmas. I thought I’d be left on the store shelf forever. Many times customers were just about ready to choose me, but when they discovered that I am handicapped, they always pushed me aside and chose someone else. You don’t know how that made me feel. Nobody wanted me. Until one day, a lady came in the store to shop. She really liked my friend in the yellow dress. In fact, I thought she would buy her. But then, she looked at me. I knew she didn’t see all of me because I was kept in a box! I wasn’t put up on display so anyone would notice me. But, this lady did notice me. She didn’t see my imperfection, at first, that part of my right leg was missing. In fact, she was taking me to the cashier when she saw it. I thought she would put me back on the shelf and I’d never have a home. I wasn’t perfect enough. But, I was wrong. The lady said, “Little girl, you are precious, just the way you are. I’m going to give you to my mama for Christmas.”
She wasn’t perfect, but Emily became a favorite Christmas gift to the author’s mother, who also had her own infirmities. Photo by Sherry Boone
The lady told me that you sometimes have trouble walking and that you would understand my problem more than anyone. She told me that your name is Delilah, but your grandchildren, great-grandchildren and other little friends call you ‘Bea Baugh.’ My name is Emily. I love you already, Bea Baugh.
DECEMBER 2014
49
Photo by Sherrie Norris
merry christmas and a happy new year from the staff at all about women
50
DECEMBER 2014
BLINDS DIRECT 17 YEARS IN THE HIGH COUNTRY
828.295.3323
Affordable Custom Window Fashions • Wood Blinds • Shutters • Patio Shades • Honeycomb Shades • We are a locally owned and operated family business. From value price items, to the top of the line products, Blinds Direct can offer you a complete product line. Schedule a free consultation with one of our experienced team members.
We Come to You...No Expensive Showroom YOU SAVE MONEY
%
25
off
Selected Fashions
More Christmas Joy from Libby’s!
Free Giftwrapping Your Headquarters
(336) 846-9551
www.libbyslook.com
205B Long St. Shamrock Square Jefferson, NC 28640
Monday-Friday 9:30 a.m. - 6 p.m. Saturday 9:30 a.m. - 5:30 p.m. Closed on Sunday