5 minute read
CREATING CONSCIOUSLY COURAGEOUS KIDS
I AM GLUED TO MY SCREEN FOR A 5TH NIGHT IN A ROW. AS I DEEP DIVE INTO THE BLACK LIVES MATTER MOVEMENT AND SYSTEMIC RACISM, I AM AWAKENED TO MY OWN IGNORANCE. IGNORANCE TO THE HISTORY OF BLACK SLAVERY, THE STOLEN GENERATION, THE GROSS PRIVILEGE I HAVE BENEFITED FROM AND MY INCOMPREHENSION OF INDIGENOUS ISSUES IN MY OWN COUNTRY.
The outrage, the despair, the fear and emotional exhaustion is palpable. The collective shout of voices across the globe is shaking us all awake!
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As a 41 year old, caucasian mother of six caucasian children, I have a lot to learn about the deep prejudices and discrimination experienced by people of colour.
While my journey to become better educated is still in its infancy, and I most certainly do not claim to be a thought leader on the topic of the Black Lives Matter movement, I do want to see change in this world! To quote Edmund Burke, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”
I have been guilty of putting the responsibility for change on individuals I would consider to be people of importance, influence or authority. The reality is that lasting change begins with you and I, in our homes, workplaces and schools.
If you are a parent, you may be wondering how you can possibly raise your children so that we can see an end to racism in our world. What steps can you take to ensure they are not oblivious to the prejudice and discrimination people of colour have experienced in the past and continue to experience today? Here are a few suggestions.
Get Educated We can’t change what we don’t know. When we take the initiative to educate ourselves we begin being a part of the solution. By listening to the stories of those who are crying out and by asking ourselves if we are, in any way, a part of the problem. Dismissive comments like “All lives matter” or “this issue doesn’t affect me”, show how much room for change is still needed. Diversify your social media feeds, your reading material and your conversations!
Open Up The Conversation “But these conversations are uncomfortable!” I hear you say. Yes, it can be uncomfortable to open your eyes and learn the truth about the history of your country of origin and countries around the world. It’s uncomfortable to realise the biases you have been conditioned to have. It’s uncomfortable to recognise the ways in which you could have made a difference but didn’t. But on the other side of these uncomfortable conversations lies greater understanding, broader perspectives and more effective actions.
Age appropriate conversations can happen at different times and in different places. If you have a child who communicates that they feel uncomfortable, find a suitable time to ask them why this topic is uncomfortable for them. When approached with gentleness and understanding it can be the perfect
segway to a worthwhile conversation. Conversations don’t always have to be long. Create and embrace teachable moments where conversation flows naturally. For our family it tends to be when we are walking in a park, driving in the car, shopping for groceries or making dinner together.
Open Ended Questions
Open ended questions may start a two minute conversation which will lead to a 3 minute conversation. Once you know a little more about the topic and share stories you have heard and report some of the facts. Open ended questions allow your children the space to process their own thoughts. By validating their opinions we open a more stable line of communication with our children, at any age. Try questions that begin with “What would you do if…?” or
“Why do you think…?”
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Education and conversation can come through the movies we watch, the music we listen to or the social media we consume. Regardless of whether or not you agree with protests during COVID-19, one thing is for sure, a generation of history makers is rising up. Be mindful of what is shaping your child’s worldview. Be mindful of what is shaping your worldview. Never before has it been so easy to curate our social media feeds to what makes us happy or comfortable. The risk here is that we can adapt to a narrow viewpoint and ignore the issues of others and there are some issues that should concern us.
Consider watching movies that give your child insight into the stories of people of colour. Include diversity in the audio-visual entertainment your child consumes and where possible, expose your children to the differences in cultural and ethnic groups. Give them an appreciation for the rich variety in our world.
A Generation Rising Regardless of whether or not you agree with protests during COVID-19, one thing is for sure, a generation of history makers is rising up. They are honoring the efforts of those who have gone before them. They are thinking globally and intergenerationally. They have vision, courage, compassion and a willingness to stand up for the rights of another! Something we could all use a
Tamara Stiller is a speaker, teacher, encourager, blogger, author, mentor and coach to mums who need someone in their corner cheering them on! As a wife and mother (to six children) business owner and entrepreneur, Tamara has a passion for connecting with women who are doubting their ability to be all they are destined to be. Having her own experience with mental health issues and feeling unworthy in her early years of parenting, Tamara stepped out of her comfort zone to discover her own unique gifts. Often referred to as “the ideas girl” Tamara works with business owners to brainstorm creative ideas and curate content plans for marketing. Her ability to recognise and nurture the uniqueness of each individual and business she works with is inspiring. Her enthusiasm and energy is contagious making collaborations both fun and uplifting! Having a successful background in competitive dance, Tamara loves working with people who have drive and focus. Through training with multiple mentors, Tamara continues to further develop her own skills in business, social media, public speaking and coaching. Passionate about creating life-giving homes, families and businesses, Tamara lights up to see others light up!
