lifestyle
MUSE MAGAZINE
Just Not My Type By Ashanthi Francis
I’d never describe myself as someone’s “type.” This observation isn’t grounded by my perception of my own attractiveness. It’s also not some weird, selfdeprecating ploy for compliments. I simply believe that no one would describe me as their ideal physical partner. This seems like a trivial thought. As someone who is well-versed in feminist perspectives, publicly admitting that I am concerned if people find me attractive is embarrassing. I’ve taken enough gender studies courses and have read enough #selflove captions on Instagram to understand that beauty is a social construct. I am not obligated to be beautiful, nor do I owe my appearance to anyone. Sure, dating might be more difficult, but attractiveness is superficial. This is why we are constantly reassured that it’s what’s on the inside that’s important, and that physical attractiveness is irrelevant compared to other facets of our identity. I understand the purpose of giving 24
JAN 2021 - APRIL 2021
advice like this - I just wish it were true. Ultimately, the questions of who we want to date, and whether people want to date us, subconsciously impact the trajectory of our lives. There will always be an element of subjectivity associated with our preferences, however, desire is political. We cannot pretend that our barometers of attractiveness are not influenced by our understanding of society. If the world is constantly telling us that we need to be skinnier, prettier, whiter, or more palatable, it’s foolish to assume that our dating preferences are untouched by these standards.
