CN: August 3, 2022

August 3, 2022

North County goes wild

Around Town A SENIOR MOMENT. Pg. 2 AUG. 12-14: Sip, savor and enjoy popular local eats and drinks at the Blues at the Arch Festival . Pg. 4 Assistance League of St. Louis receives a donation from 100 Women Who Care. Pg. 3 Saturdays, Aug. 27, Sept.

24, Oct. 22: St. Louis Zoo WildCare Park to host 2022 community family nature programs. Pg. 4 Local businesses help those affected by floods. Pg. 5

Feature Section 2022 Best of Northwest County Winners. Pgs. 6-8

Features

These artistic renderings show the experiences visitors will be able to have at the Saint Louis Zoo WildCare Park in North St. Louis County.

Images courtesy St. Louis Zoo

Saint Louis Zoo WildCare Park at the zoo’s North County Campus will provide visitors with up-close-and-personal experiences with wildlife

By Wendy Todd If an African safari has been on your bucket list but you haven’t been able to make it to the continent, you’re in luck. Because in a few years, the safari will come to you.

The St. Louis Zoo North County Campus is working on an expansion called the Saint Louis Zoo WildCare Park that will include four different safari experiences along with a host of other attractions.

“We are excited to share these WildCare Park updates,” said Dwight Scott, Dana Brown President & CEO, Saint Louis Zoo.

“Our team has been extremely busy and we look forward to sharing more updates on WildCare Park as we move forward.”

According to the St. Louis Zoo, the WildCare Park will include: • A “zooseum” that will be a 5,000-8,000 square foot interactive indoor zoo-museum-science center and will use augmented reality and virtual reality as well as other technologies to help guests feel how animals experience the world.

• Nature adventure area – 60 acres of land geared toward families and children who

can (re)discover nature surrounded by native Missouri wildlife flora and fauna.

• Safari observation tower – For a fee, guests can enjoy a one-of-a-kind experience by going 11 stories up in the air to take in 360-degree views of WildCare Park, the cityscape and the Missouri-Mississippi River Confluence.

There will also be a premium safari experience where customers can pay for a guided tour with an animal expert. Though safari See ‘WILD’ page 2

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Around Town

August 3, 2022 • Community News – St. Louis County • www.mycnews.com

‘WILD’ from cover Get your event or good news published in Community News: email your information in calendar and article formats to editor@mycnews.com

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animals will be a mix of endangered and non-endangered species, animals featured in the WildCare Park will extend beyond the selection at the zoo to offer variety.

Additional amenities include giraffe feeding where patrons can get up-close and personal with giraffes to feed them. “Glamping” will also be available for patrons who want a luxury camping experience in one of the ten available cabins. A restaurant will be available for patrons to dine.

And there will be an event center in which patrons can book rooms for small events and larger celebrations.

Also, a facility, the Kent Family Conservation and Animal Science Center – a donation from the Jerry and Judy Kent – will help sustain endangered and threatened species.

Research and educational initiatives will also be a part of the project.

Biodiversity studies are being pursued at the St. Louis Zoo and will continue at the WildCare Park. The eight areas of study include: bats, birds, coyotes and foxes, invertebrates/pollinators, plants, reptiles, amphibians, and water quality of lakes and streams. There will also be educational programming for young patrons to help them learn about animals and nature.

The St. Louis Zoo was first conceived in 1904 as an attraction at the World’s Fair when a flight cage was used as an attraction. It appeared as a giant walk-through bird cage. The City of St. Louis purchased the bird cage and by 1910 the Zoological Society of St. Louis in 1910 made the zoo official.

The WildCare Park project will be free to county residents and the cost for St. Louis city residents is to be determined. The 425-acre complex is projected to be completed in 2027 and the estimated cost is $230 million. Financial resources include philanthropy, external financing proceeds and existing and future Zoo and Saint Louis Zoo Association cash reserves. Next year animals will begin arriving at WildCare Park for a pilot pasture.

“At WildCare Park, guests will be immersed in nature and animal pastures, providing unique experiences with every visit,” said Dr. Jo-Elle Mogerman, Ph.D., Saint Louis Zoo WildCare Park Director. “Every visit will be a new adventure.”

Images courtesy St. Louis Zoo These artistic renderings show the experiences visitors will be able to have at the Saint Louis Zoo WildCare Park in North St. Louis County.

Copy Editor Donna Huneke Staff Writers Brett Auten, Wendy Todd, Laurie Simon

THIS WEEK’S PICK

Columnists Gary Baute, Steve Bryan, Cindy Moore Cartoonist John Hanna Social Media Lori North Classiied Advertising Brooke Tolle Display Advertising Heather Deatz, Bob Huneke, Norm Merchant, Laurie Simon Circulation Dominion Distribution, Papers Unlimited Community News is a Registered Trademark of Huneke Publications, Inc: Neither the advertiser nor the publisher is responsible or liable for misinformation, misprints, typographical errors, etc., herein contained. Huneke Publications, Inc. reserves the right to accept or reject all news and advertising copy which in the sole judgement and discretion of the publisher/editor is not suitable or deemed appropriate for publication. Copyright 2021 Huneke Publications, Inc. with all rights reserved. No part of the publications may be repr duced in any form without permission in writing from the publisher/editor.

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T

he St. Louis Jewish Community Center (The J) will host its 44th annual St. Louis Jewish Book Festival from Nov. 6-13. Former U.S. Ambassador to Ukraine Marie Yovanovitch will be the keynote author to kick off the 2022 festival.

On Nov. 6 at 7 p.m., Yovanovitch will be joined on stage at the Staenberg Family Complex’s Performing Arts Center by Professor James Wertsch of Washington University in St. Louis to discuss her new book, “Lessons from The Edge: A Memoir.”

“We are so honored that Ambassador Yovanovitch will be our keynote of the 44th St. Louis Jewish Book Festival. We invite the entire St. Louis region to join us at the J to hear from this true American hero who has dedicated her professional career to the service of our country and the fight for democracy, truth and freedom for all, even under the most trying and challenging circumstances,” said Rabbi Brad Horwitz,

The J to host 44th annual St. Louis Jewish Book Festival, announces keynote author Director of Jewish Engagement and Adult Programs at the J. The festival continues through Nov. 13 with a lineup of bestselling authors, investigative journalists, Netflix stars, nationally known chefs, true crime events and more.

Author Charles Bosworth Jr. and criminal defense attorney Joel Schwartz take the stage on Nov. 7 at 7 p.m. to discuss their book, “Bone Deep Untangling the Betsy Faria Murder Case,” which is the true story behind NBC’s mini-series, “The Thing About Pam.” The festival welcomes investigative journalist and New York Times bestselling author Gregory Zuckerman on Nov. 9 at 1 p.m. to speak on his newest book, “A Shot to Save The World: The Inside Story of the Life-Or-Death Race for a COVID-19 Vaccine.”

Star of the Netflix reality show, “My Unorthodox Life,” Julia Haart, will discuss her

Wall Street Journal and USA Today bestselling book, “Brazen,” on Nov. 10 at 7 p.m.

In addition to the weeklong festival in November, the St. Louis Jewish Book Festival will host a bookend event with James Beard award-winning author Michael Twitty to discuss his book, “Koshersoul: The Faith and Food Journey of an African American Jew” on Sept. 13 at 7 p.m. This event is being held in conjunction with the Sababa Arts & Culture Festival, which occurs on Sept. 18.

Premiere Pass Tickets, which provide entrance to more than 18 author programs year-round, are now on sale and can be purchased at https://www.showpass.com/ jewish-book-festival-all-access-pass-2/. A full lineup of over 25 festival authors will be announced in August.

For safety presenters, staff and volunteers, masks will be required for all audience members at all book festival events.

www.mycnews.com • Community News – St. Louis County • August 3, 2022

The J to host biannual Used Book Sale The St. Louis Jewish Community Center’s biannual Used Book Sale returns from Aug. 28-Sept. 1 with offerings in every genre, including mysteries, general fiction, nonfiction, children’s books, and much more.

“The Used Book Sale at the J is a great place to find amazing bargains and valuable collectibles, “said Lynn Wittels, President and CEO of the J. “The sale is well recognized by book dealers and the literature community as being among the best in the St. Louis region.”

Preview day is Aug. 28 from 10 a.m.

– 4 p.m. with a $10 admission and free admission begins on Monday. Hours are 10 a.m. – 7 p.m. Monday-Wednesday and on Thursday customers can fill a bag for $5 between 10 a.m. and 6 p.m. Masks are required for entry.

Thousands of books will be available for sale at the Annual J Used Book

Sale. Stock up on your reading material. Proceeds from the sale benefit the Cultural Arts Department.

Book lovers, collectors and avid readers all anticipate this annual event. Thousands of titles will be available, including mystery and intrigue, novels, biographies, politics, religion, sports, cookbooks, history, animals, art, science, science fiction, business, women’s issues, foreign languages, gardening, poetry, psychology, selfhelp, humor…the list goes on.

Parents and educators will find a large selection of books for children and youth as well as educational materials for homeschoolers. Multiples of titles are available for book club reading along with miscellaneous videos, books on tape/CDs and DVDs. For updated and complete information visit https://jccstl.com/programs/ used-book-sale/.

Assistance League of St. Louis receives a donation from 100 Women Who Care

www.agingahead.org

Submitted photo

Recently, the Assistance League of St. Louis received a $4,750 check from local organization, 100 Women Who Care. Assistance League will use this money to help fund its philanthropic programs which benefit children and adults.

Shown accepting the check are Assistance League members Polly Rutherford (far left) and Past President Yolanda Perez-Cunningham (second from left) along with Women Who Care members Julie Herrmann and Lisa Rosenstock (on the right).

www.cnbstl.com

Around Town

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August 3, 2022 • Community News – St. Louis County • www.mycnews.com

2022 community family nature programs will be hosted by St. Louis Zoo WildCare Park St. Louis Zoo WildCare Park is offering a Family Outdoor Discovery Program for families with children ages five and up.to attend. It is a three-session program which will be held on Saturdays: Aug. 27, Sept. 24 and Oct. 22.

Note, in case of inclement weather, programs will be held on the following Sunday.

Participants will learn about native wildlife through science observational activities. Participants should

dress for the weather, be prepared to be outdoors and on foot for the entire program and traverse uneven terrain.

Advance online registration is required. Please register at: www.stlzoo.org/communityfamily programs.

You can register immediate family members residing in the same household. Family members living in separate households should register themselves. Parental/guardian signatures are required for all partici-

pants under 18 years of age.

Limited to 20 participants per session. Choose a.m. or p.m. session. The a.m. session is from 9:30 - 11:30 a.m. The p.m. session is from 1 - 3 p.m.

Cost is free to low to moderate-income families living in North St. Louis County. For more information, email educationalquestions@stlzoo.org or call 314646-4544, option #6, Monday through Friday, 9 a.m. to 3 p.m.

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By Vicki Bahr

Living in a haunted house The grandkids were all playing downstairs together the last time everyone was in town, helping six-yearold Adler set up his pretend restaurant and creating a toy store for 11-year-old Caroline to “sell” things from.

The older ones were running up and down the stops for provisions: plastic bags for sales, snack provisions for the hard workers and markers to create signs and draw on the cardboard boxes that were stacked to make shop boundaries and artificial walkways.

We have a favorite gift of mine hanging on the wall downstairs, along with an eclectic array of Blue Angels posters, a couple of frames soccer pictures from son Adam’s college career and a giant-sized map of the U.S. (no, it hasn’t helped my knowledge of geography one bit and I have no idea why it was put up to begin with).

But back to the gift. It’s an old, heavy, framed window that was repurposed by painting over the glass to create a picture of a haunted house on Halloween, evening, with a huge yellow moon in the corner and cute little ghosts flying out of the house’s windows. My daughter-in-law gave it to me as a Christmas gift one year, knowing as all of my relatives do, my love of all things Halloween and autumn.

Adler has always been intrigued by the old window, wondering how it “used to look,” what kind of paint the artist used, and dreaming up “spooky stories” about the haunted house that is painted on it. Truth be told, I think he’s just a little afraid of the window, and tests his bravado by talking about it and wanting it to be part of his pretend restaurant’s artwork.

He read the letters on the window that spell out “Haunted House” for the first time by himself that night and looked at me with huge, questioning eyes.

“Grandma, is your house really haunted?”

I laughed with him and said, “Of course not. You know Grandma just loves Halloween, and this painted window is too big and heavy to store anywhere until Halloween, so I just leave it down here all the time where it can’t be broken.”

He would not have wanted to hear the first answer that nearly came out of my mouth before I had a chance to think about it. Of course, this house is haunted.

We’ve been here for 45 of its 50 years, and it’s haunted by so many memories.

Chris was just three, and Adam only four months old when we first walked through the doors of the empty house, marveling at how big it was and wondering how in the world anyone could ever fill all the closets and cabinets. I remember sitting on the bedroom floor and nursing Adam when the time got away from us as we toured the “home for sale” and he wanted his dinner.

I also remember whispering to him, “I think this is going to be your new home, baby Adam,” and a month later, it was.

Over the years, our “starter home” has seen so many changes, from fire engine wallpaper in the boys’ room when they declared they wanted to sleep in the same room in bunk beds forever, to the bright pink bedroom we painted for daughter Katie in celebration of all things “girlie” which she inspired from day one and the blue bedroom baby sister Becca decided on in lieu of “ugly pink.”

Our house is haunted by the laughter of children and the memories of family holidays, by the voices of long-deceased relatives and the many readings of “The Night Before Christmas.” The bathtub was the setting of Rub-A-Dub-Dub toys and bubble baths, showers after high school soccer games and the splashing of grandkids after a day of fun at our house.

Walls have been repainted and papered so many times that I can only recall the many choices by seeing them in pictures, and we’ve changed the flooring and the sliding glass door, the bathroom tile and the kitchen counters, added two bedrooms in the basement and recessed lighting in the family room, trees and shrubs and a basketball hoop that still stands in the backyard because it was set in concrete and “done right.”

This house is haunted by holidays past and thousands of plain ordinary days that passed uneventfully but saw babies grow and homework completed, hearts broken and trophies won, too many birthday candles to count, so many graduations celebrated, exciting moments and life-changing tragedies.

Oh, this house is haunted alright, but in the most wonderful ways imaginable. I can barely turn a corner without a memory coming along with me, and I’m continually finding ink or pencil or chalk signatures and messages and dates written on the unfinished walls of the laundry room downstairs, ghosts of days and nights past and memories cherished in the stories and the smiles that build upon each other…year after year after year of our home’s life.

Vicki Bahr is an inveterate word lover and story sharer, a published author in magazine, newspaper and blog forms. As a mom of four, grandma of nine, and wife of one for 50 years, she finds that inspiration and wonder are everywhere.

The opinions expressed in this column are the columnist’s alone and do not reflect the opinion of the owners or staff of Community News.

www.mycnews.com • Community News – St. Louis County • August 3, 2022

Regional Business Council allocates $100,000 to the United Way to support residents affected by flooding The Regional Business Council is making a $100,000 donation to the United Way to be allocated to the St. Louis Area Food Bank and the American Red Cross for flood relief support following last month’s devastating flash flooding in the St. Louis Metro area. Each organization will receive $50,000.

“Our hearts go out to the victims of the recent flood and we want to help by making a gift to the United Way to help those most in need,” said Kathy Osborn, president and CEO of the Regional Business Council. “In St. Louis we care for each other.”

Residents were forced to flee their homes after the record rainfall, up to 10 inches in some areas, deluged roads, submerged vehicles and flooded neighborhoods.

Interstates and other roadways were closed and Metro Link trains delayed because of the floodwaters. Many residents were forced to seek shelter in neighboring community centers and schools. The American Red Cross of Greater St. Louis and the St. Louis Area Food Bank are providing food, water, blankets and other essential necessities to those affected by the flooding.

Around Town

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Ameren makes $25,000 donation to American Red Cross for flood recovery assistance To help communities across both Missouri and Illinois affected by the historic flooding that occurred on the morning of July 26, Ameren Corporation is donating $25,000 to the American Red Cross to assist in ongoing relief and assistance efforts. These include shelter, food, health and mental health services, as well as bulk distribution of needed items to meet the basic human needs of those affected.

“Our thoughts go out to all those in our community who have been impacted by the flooding as they go about the work of recovering from the damage caused by this unprecedented storm,” said Marty Lyons, president and CEO of Ameren Corporation. “In addition to deploying hundreds of our Ameren co-workers to

assist in safely restoring power to our customers, we are providing this additional donation to support the American Red Cross and the essential role they play in providing needed emergency relief to so many during this challenging time.”

For those wishing to make their own donation, please visit RedCross.org to make a contribution.

The Ameren Corporation Charitable Trust was established in 1944 to serve as a principal source of the company’s philanthropic investments in community projects and programs. Allocations from the Trust’s AmerenCares program come entirely from corporate earnings – and are not charged to customers as a business expense.

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Sip, savor and enjoy popular local eats and drinks at the Blues at the Arch Festival While blues music rocks the grounds of Gateway Arch National Park at Blues at the Arch Festival, attendees can drink craft beer and cocktails at “Booze @ Blues” and nosh on a variety of eats from popular local food trucks. The weekend-long festival is happening Aug. 12-14, in the park’s North Gateway, near the Eads Bridge and Laclede’s Landing.

Featured local establishments are: • Sugarfire Smokehouse • Jive Turkey Eats • Kimchi Guys • The Little Busy B Catering • Gulf Shores Restaurant & Grill • Boardwalk Waffles & Ice Cream • Booze @ Blues, featuring local craft beers from Soulard Mardi Gras Brewers’ Heritage series and craft cocktails by STL Barkeep: Guests can purchase single-serve drinks, or purchase a strip of five tickets for a discounted price. (Must be 21 or older.) The special craft beer offering pays homage to St. Louis’ legacy as not just a blues city, but a brewery city, as well, with many advancements in brewing having occurred on what is now Gateway Arch National Park.

Blues at the Arch Festival is hosted by Gateway Arch

Park Foundation, in partnership with the National Blues Museum and the National Park Service, and showcases the talents of national and local blues entertainers with live concerts on Friday, Aug. 12 and Saturday, Aug. 13. On Sunday, Aug. 14, guests are invited to attend a special, ticketed Blues Brunch at 612North, and explore the park and National Blues Museum.

On Friday and Saturday, children of all ages can enjoy the Kids Korner, which features a musical “petting zoo,” coloring activities and more! A musical petting zoo is an assortment of real instruments available to pick up and try out. Participants can learn the names of the instruments and what instrument family they belong to.

Before the festivities kick off on Saturday morning, guests can also enjoy a free, outdoor Barre3 fitness class.

“Our Blues at the Arch Festival lineup offers something for everyone – music lovers, local food and drink fans, and even fitness gurus!” said Ryan McClure, executive director of Gateway Arch Park Foundation. “It is our mission at Gateway Arch Park Foundation to keep Gateway Arch National Park a vibrant and thriving public space now and for generations to come. This is an incredible way to enjoy the beauty of the park and honor St. Louis’ blues music history while making new memories with family and friends.”

For more information on the Blues at the Arch Festival, visit archpark.org/blues.

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6

Place Winners!

1 2022 BEST OF NORTHWEST COUNTY

August 3, 2022 • Community News – St. Louis County • www.mycnews.com

Congratulations to the

st

Presented by

CONGRATULATIONS TO THE 1ST PLACE WINNERS! Accounting/Bookkeeping

Advertising/Marketing

Apartments/Condos

Associations/Non-Profits

Joel R. Spigel CPA 745 Craig Rd. Ste 302 Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314 -567-7878 www.joelrspigelcpapc.com

DDI Media 8315 Drury Industrial Parkway St. Louis, MO 63114 314-506-6478 www.ddimedia.net

Fontainebleau Apartments 1001 N. McKnight Rd. St. Louis, MO 63132 314-994-3011 www.fontainebleaustl.com

Butterfly Haven 8505 Mid County Industrial Dr. St. Louis, MO 63114 314-884-1996 www.butterflyhaveninc.com

Attorney

Automobile Body Repair

Automobile Dealers / New

Automobile Dealers / Used

Automobile Repair

Bakery

James, Hutchison & Forth, P.C. 111 Westport Plaza St. Louis, MO 63146 314-434-5222 www.jameslawpc.com

Schaefer Autobody Centers 10771 Baur Blvd.

St. Louis, MO 63132 636-305-8288 www.schaeferautobody.com

Weber Chevrolet 12015 Olive Blvd.

Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314-567-3300 www.weberchev.com

Frank Leta Auto Group 12101 St. Charles Rock Rd. Bridgeton, MO 63044 314-395-8900 www.frankleta.com

Hood’s Automotive 198 Northwest Industrial Court Bridgeton, MO 63044 314-739-4611 www.hoodsauto.com

La Bonne Bouchee Patisserie 12344 Olive Blvd.

Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314-576-6606 www.labonnebouchee.com

Bank

Banquet Center/Event Venue

Car Wash

Catering

Child Care Services

Chiropractor

Commercial Bank 2330 West Port Plaza Dr. Maryland Heights, MO 63146 314-434-4141 www.mycbstl.bank

Orlando’s Event Centers 2050 Dorsett Village Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-463-9000 www.orlandogardens.com

Waterway Carwash 10559 Old Olive Street Rd. Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314-567-3670

Tornatores Catering 11329 Bridgeton Valley Ct. Bridgeton, MO 63044 314-574-1228 tornatoresitalianrestaurant.com/catering

Happy Day Preschool 8875 Lackland Rd. Overland, MO 63114 314-427-0353 overlandchurchofchrist.com/hdpreschool

ProActive Chiropractic 12370 Olive Blvd.

Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314-485-1442 www.proactive-chiropractic.com

www.waterway.com/location/crevecoeur

Computer Services

Construction

Credit Union

Dentist

Disaster Restoration

Donuts

CMIT Solutions of Clayton 11500 Olive Blvd.

St. Louis, MO 63141 314-628-0811 www.cmitsolutions.com/clayton

Stryker Construction 9419 Lackland Rd. St. Louis, MO 63114 314-222-0272 www.stryker-construction.com

First Community Credit Union 10950 Olive Blvd.

Creve Coeur, MO 63141 636-728-3333 www.firstcommunity.com

St. Louis Smile Center 12105 Bridgeton Sq. Dr. Bridgeton, MO 63044 314-298-7772 www.smilestlouis.com

FIRST ONSITE Property Restoration 2685 Metro Blvd.

Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-772-9010 www.firstonsite.com

Tony’s Donuts & Cafe 12218 McKelvey Rd. Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-739-1388 www.TonysDonuts.com

Electrical Contractors

Florist

Funeral Services

General Contractor

Golf Course

Gym/Fitness Center

Baldi Electric Co. 10723 Baur Blvd.

St. Louis, MO 63132 314-968-9999 www.baldielectric.com

Carol’s Corner Florist & Gifts 9456 Midland Blvd.

St. Louis, MO 63114 314-427-1221 www.carolscornerflorist.com

Collier’s Funeral Home 3400 N. Lindbergh Blvd.

St. Ann, MO 63074 314-298-1212 www.colliersfuneralhome.com

Dannegger Brothers Waterproofing 2385 Verna Ave. Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-993-1833 www.danneggerbrothers.com

Creve Coeur Golf Course 11400 Olde Cabin Rd. Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314-432-1806 www.crevecoeurgolf.com

Edward Jones Family YMCA 12521 Marine Ave. St. Louis, MO 63146 314-439-9622 www.gwrymca.org

Home Improvement/Remodeling

Home Health Care Svcs (CDS)

Home Improvement/Remodeling

ArchWell Health 9150 Overland Plaza Overland, MO 63114 314-349-7920 www.archwellhealth.com

Classic Aire Care Inc. 1276 N. Warson Road St. Louis, MO 63132 314-352-1111 www.classicairecare.com

Phoenix Home Care 2088 Craigshire Road St. Louis, MO 63146 314-205-3020 www.phoenixhomehc.com

Overland Hardware 2520 Woodson Rd. Overland, MO 63114 314-427-1404 www.overlandhardware.net

Invest Srvcs/Financial Planner

Jeweler

Landscaping/Lawn Care Svcs

Nursing Homes/Extended Care

Office Equipment/Furniture

Optometry

Saleeby and Associates 11301 Olive Blvd.

St. Louis, MO 63141 314-997-7486 www.saleebyandassociates.com

Romantique Jewelers 3430 McKelvey Rd. Bridgeton, MO 63044 314-291-0048 www.romantiquejewelers.com

Ritter Landscaping/Lawn Care 41 Millwell Court Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-209-7111 www.Ritterland.com

Delmar Gardens of Creve Coeur 850 Country Manor Ln. Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314-434-5900 www.delmargardens.com

Better Office Furniture 202 Rock Industrial Park Dr. Bridgeton, MO 63044 314-266-9083 www.BetterOfficeFurniture.com

Overland Optical Family Eye Care 2533 Woodson Rd. St. Louis, MO 63114 314-423-3874 www.overlandoptical.com

Healthcare Clinic

Heating & Cooling (HVAC)

Branneky True Value Hardware 11403 St. Charles Rock Rd. TIE VOTE Bridgeton, MO 63044 314-739-0960 www.brannekyhardware.com

Ins Agent w/Agency Name State Farm Ins. - Rachel Williams 9360 Olive Blvd.

St. Louis, MO 63132 314-485-8990 www.rollingwithrachel.com

Photography

Physical Therapy

Physician w/Hosp Affiliation

Printing/Copy Service

Real Estate Agent

Trotter Art, Inc. 12342 Conway Rd. St. Louis, MO 63141 314-878-0777 www.trotterart.com

Advanced Training & Rehab 675 Old Ballas Rd. Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314-310-6655 www.atr-stl.com

Dr Otha Myles - Archwell Health 9150 Overland Plaza Overland, MO 63114 314-349-7920 www.archwellhealth.com

Restaurant - Dine In

Minuteman Press 10762 Indian Head Industrial Blvd.

St. Louis, MO 63132 314-997-6046 www.minuteman.com

The Peter Lu Team 11142 Olive Blvd.

St. Louis, MO 63141 314-662-6578 www.peterluteam.com

Syberg’s Restaurant 2430 Old Dorsett Road Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-785-0481 www.sybergs.com

Retirement Communities

Roofing Contractors

Salon/Barber Shop

Skilled Nursing/Rehab

Sports Bar & Grill

Tax Preparation

The Sarah Community 3393 McKelvey Rd. Bridgeton, MO 63044 314-209-7000 www.thesarahcommunity.com

John Beal, Inc. 12181 Prichard Farm Rd. Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-274-2950 www.johnbealroofing.com

Hair Statement 98 Midland Ave. Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-514-7778 www.hairstatement.com

Life Care Center of Bridgeton 12145 Bridgeton Sq Dr. Bridgeton, MO 63044 314-298-7444 www.lifecarecenterofbridgeton.com

The Post Sports Bar & Grill 763 Old Ballas Rd. Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314-736-1205 www.thepostsportsbar.com

Milhouse & Neal 40 Weldon Parkway Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-995-6900 www.mn-cpa.com

Towing & Roadside Assistance

Travel Agent

Veterinarian

Wellness/Spa

(Write-In Pick) Arts & Education

Doc’s Towing 2810 Walton Rd. St. Louis, MO 63114 314-426-0110 www.docstowingstl.com

Urgent Care

Brentwood Travel 1022 Executive Parkway Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314-439-5700 www.brentwoodtravel.com

St. Luke’s Urgent Care - Creve Coeur 11550 Olive Blvd.

Creve Coeur, MO 63141 314-542-7690 www.stlukes-stl.com

My Best Friend Veterinary Center 9350 Olive Blvd.

Olivette, MO 63132 314-567-5577 www.mybestfriendvet.com

Pro-Fit Wellness & Spa 11972 Dorsett Road Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-780-3749 www.pfwellnessandspa.com

DaySpring Arts and Education 2500 Metro Maryland Heights, MO 63043 314-291-8878 www.dayspringarts.org

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2022 BEST OF NORTHWEST COUNTY

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August 3, 2022 • Community News – St. Louis County • www.mycnews.com

2022 BEST OF NORTHWEST COUNTY

What’s Happening Send your event to editor@mycnews.com and we'll print it!

Take notice . . .

The events listed in this section are the latest updates as of press time, please check with individual sites for the most up to date cancellations and reschedule info.

EVENTS

Aug. 6: Mobile market and school supply giveaway Florissant Presbyterian Church at 660 Charbonier will be having a free mobile market and a school supply giveaway from 8:30 – 11 a.m., as long as supplies last.

Aug. 7: Off to college benefit for gun violence survivor

Off To College Trunk Party Benefiting Jordan Cannaday takes place from noon to 4 p.m. at Dave & Buster’s at 13857 Riverport Dr. in Maryland Heights.

www.pfwellnessandspa.com

Aug. 26: Trivia night

The Center for Head Injury Services – a nonprofit that empowers those with brain injuries, autism, and other cognitive disabilities – will host its 16th annual “Gray Matters” trivia night at the Maryland Heights Community Center located at 2300 McKelvey Rd. in Maryland Heights. Doors open at 6:30 p.m., and trivia begins at 7 p.m. Proceeds from the event will benefit the nonprofit’s programs and services.

Tickets are $25 per person and $200 for a table of eight. Premier tickets – which are $40 per person and $320 per table of eight – include a chef-prepared menu of snacks, appetizers, salad, entrée, dessert, beer and soda. For more information or to register, call 314-983-9230 or visit www. headinjuryctr-stl.org.

RECURRING EVENTS Weekdays: Food pantry volunteers needed

www.stlukes-stl.com/urgent-care

The Harvey Kornblum Jewish Food Pantry is in need of ongoing adult volunteers to sort food, stock shelves and shop with clients. Two-tofour hour shifts are available, Monday-Friday 8:45 a.m.3:45 p.m. To learn more or to join this fun group, contact Chelsey Banaskavich at 314513-1674 or cbanaskavich@ jfcs-stl.org.

Mondays: Choral Arts Group meetings

Choral Arts Group practices every Monday from 7 to 9 p.m. at Connection Christian Church at 1332 Feise Rd. in O’Fallon. Auditions not required. Ages high school and older are invited to join.

There will be spring and fall public concerts. For more information call Marty at 636579-9227, or email concertartsa@gmail.com.

Mondays: City council meetings

City of Pine Lawn holds regular city council meetings at city hall at 6250 Steve Marre Ave. in Pine Lawn on the second Monday of the month at 6:30 p.m. The meetings are open to the public.

Mondays: meetings

Workshop

City of Pine Lawn holds regular workshop meetings at city hall at 6250 Steve Marre Ave. in Pine Lawn on the fourth Monday of the month at 6:30 p.m. The meetings are open to the public.

Mondays: singers

A

cappella

All men who like to sing are invited to come sing with us, The Men of Harmony.

We practice every Monday night at 7 p.m. at 5500 Parker Raoad which is the first house on Uthe Lane. We sing fourpart harmony a capella (without accompaniment). We sing some traditional songs, as well as show tunes and more contemporary music.

We do perform for the public at various functions. Persons interested can come right on in or for more information call Al at 314-993-6134.

Mondays: Korean War Veterans Association meeting

If you had military service in Korea between Sept. 3, 1945 and the present you are cordially invited to a meeting of Chapter 4, North County Korean War Veterans Association. Meetings take place at the VFW Post 4105 at 410 St. Francois in Florissant on the

second Monday of the month, starting at 7 p.m. For more information contact Walter Kaiser at 314-921-2132. For a limited period the Chapter will pay for one (1) year membership for new members.

Mondays-Thursdays: Volunteers needed

Community Action Agency of St. Louis County is in need of volunteers to stock shelves, sort food shipments and pack bags for Food Pantry Clients Monday through Thursday from 8 a.m. until 3 p.m. Two to four hour shifts are available. If you are interested, please contact Cheryl Piece at 314-446-4440 or cpiece@ caastlc.org for additional information.

Tuesdays: Bingo

Florissant Elks Bingo takes place at 16400 New Halls Ferry every Tuesday. Doors open at 4 p.m., bingo starts at 6 p.m. No outside food or drinks allowed per St. Louis County. Food and drinks available for purchase. Maximum 150 players. Must wear mask to enter. Social distancing followed.

Tuesdays: singers

A

cappella

The Gentlemen of Sound are looking for men who like to sing or want to learn. They practice Tuesdays at Lady of the Pillar school at 401 S. Lindbergh from 7 – 9 p.m.

They try to do public events monthly. Always looking for new members. Come by or call Charlie at 314-954-1121.

Tuesdays: Chair Zumba

Chair Zumba every Tuesday from 2:15 – 3 p.m. at The Bridge At Florissant at 1101 Garden Plaza Dr. (Parker @ Arlington). For more information call 314-831-0988.

Tuesdays: Celebrate Recovery

Celebrate Recovery Tuesday meetings take place at 6 p.m. with a Saturday Bible Study at 9 a.m. at LifePoint Church at 424 Graham Rd. in Florissant. For more information visit www.lifepointministries.church/celebrate-recovery or call (men) Steve D. at 636-634-6582 or (women) Denise W. at 530-417-6151.

Tuesdays: Choir rehearsals

The St. Louis Chordinals, a women’s a cappella chorus, rehearse every Tuesday evening from 7 - 9:30 p.m. at Beautiful Savior Lutheran

www.mycnews.com • Community News – St. Louis County • August 3, 2022 Church at 12397 Natural Bridge Rd. in Bridgeton (next to the Bridgeton Government Center). For more information call Linda at 314-839-3495 or visit stlouischordinals.org.

Tuesdays: TOPS (Take off pounds sensibly) From 9:15 - 10:30 a.m. located at John F. Kennedy Center/Henry Koch Ctr., Howdershell Rd. at Charbonier Rd., Florissant. For more info contact Paul McConnell, 314-831-5476.

2nd Tuesday Sept.-June: Show-me Stitchers: Show-me Stitchers is the local chapter of the Embroiderers’ Guild of America. We meet on the second Tuesday, Sept.June at 6:30 p.m. at Trinity Lutheran Church, 14088 Clayton Road, Chesterfield, MO. Learn needlepoint, embroidery, cross stitch, and more.

Every 4th Tuesday of the month: Fort Bellefontaine Memorial American Legion Post 335 meeting

6:30pm, Fort Bellefontaine Memorial American Legion Post 335, at the Bellefontaine Neighbors Community Center at 9669 Bellefontaine Rd. Those interested in membership are invited to attend.

Wednesdays: Bingo

Bingo takes place every Wednesday at American Legion Post 338 at 9655 Midland Blvd. in Overland. Doors open at 5 p.m. For more information contact Chairman Ed Hilleman at 314-660-1813.

Wednesdays: Bingo

TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) meets from 6 p.m. - 7:30 p.m. at St. Andrews United Methodist Church at 3975 N. Hwy 67 in Florissant. For more information contact Norma at 314-306-4731.

Every Wednesday: Bingo Morning at Florissant Elks Lodge #2316

Florissant Elks Lodge #2316, 16400 New Halls Ferry Rd. in Florissant. Doors at 7:30 a.m., games begin at 9:30 a.m. For more information, call 314-921-2316.

Bridgeton Trails Library Branch Programs:

3455 McKelvey Rd., St. Louis, 314-994-3300. Story Time: Wednesdays, 10:30 a.m. 9 months to 2 yrs. Room 1 (Lap Time); Wednesdays, 10:30 a.m. Ages 3–5. Room 2; Thursdays, 10:30 a.m. Ages 3–5. Room 1.

Florissant Senior Citizens’ Bingo Clubs: 314-839-7604.

Every 1st Wednesday of the Month: Stroke Support Group

3-4 p.m., Center for Senior Renewal, Detrick Building 1st floor, 11133 Dunn Rd. For more information, contact Jamie Stevens at 314-653-5331.

Thursdays: Bingo

Community Bingo at the Bridge At Florissant, at 1101 Garden Plaza Drive (intersection of Parker and Arlington) takes place on the third Thursday of each month starts at 2 p.m. There will be snacks and prizes. For more information call 314-831-0988.

Life Care Center of Bridgeton, at 12145 Bridgeton Square in Bridgeton, welcome all to Community Bingo every last Wednesday of the month at 2:30 p.m. Light refreshment will be served. Please RVSP at 314-298-7444 with the month you will attend and number of people attending.

Thursdays: Quilting guild

Wednesdays: TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly)

Free blood pressure checks monthly at Life Care Center of

Every third Thursday of the month the Flower Valley Quilting Guild meets at 7 p.m. in the old school at the Old St. Ferdinand Shrine, 1 Rue St. Francois, Florissant.

Thursdays: Blood pressure checks

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Florissant at 1201 Garden Plaza Dr. (off Parker Rd.) in Florissant every third Thursday of the month. Call 831-3752 for more information.

Thursdays: Women’s chorus meeting

Every Thursday City Voices Chorus, a women’s chorus singing four-part a cappella harmony, meets at Church of the Good Shepherd at 1166 S. Mason Rd. in St. Louis. Members come from the entire bistate region. Call Marcia at 636-274-0723 for more information or visit www.cityvoiceschorus.org.

Fridays: Fish fry

St. Ferdinand Fish Fry at 1765 Charbonier Rd. in Florissant, has resumed every Friday from 3 - 7 p.m.

Fridays: Fish fry

A fish fry takes place every Friday at American Legion Post 338 at 9655 Midland Blvd. in Overland from 11 a.m. to 7 p.m. For more information contact Chairman Ed Hilleman at 314-660-1813.

Every Friday: Our Lady of Fatima #4429 Knights of Columbus Bingo 6:45 p.m., Knights of Columbus Hall, 1216 Teson Rd. in Hazelwood. For more information call 314-731-9330.

Toastmasters Saturdays 9 to 10:30 a.m. at Normandy United Methodist Church at 8001 Natural Bridge Road (across from UMSL). For more info call 314-402-7025.

Saturdays: Free walk-in clinic

Salam Clinic at St. Peter’s United Church of Christ at 1425 Stein Road at West Florissant in Ferguson is a free walk-in clinic open Saturdays from 11 a.m. – 1 p.m. The clinic is jointly sponsored by the Muslim Community of St. Louis (MCSL) and St. Peter’s United Church of Christ to provide basic adult medical screening, treatment and referrals free of charge for the uninsured. For more information or if you would be interested in volunteering, please call 314-521-5694 9 a.m. – 4 p.m. Monday – Friday or visit www.stpeterschurch.org.

What’s Happening

Saturdays: Grief support

On the fourth Saturday of each month, grief support meeting “A Way With Words Ministry” meets at 12:30 p.m. at Community Christ Fellowship, rear, at 121 Williams Blvd. in Hazelwood, 1/4 mile south of Hwy 270 off Florissant Rd. There are a variety of topics monthly. You are not alone. Come

9

help your heart heal with others. For more information call 314-605-3949.

Every Fourth Saturday’s Writer’s Workshop

10 a.m. - 1:30 p.m. at Baden Library, at 8448 Church Rd. For more information call 314-388-2400.

Saturdays: Clothing sale

On the second Saturday of each month Bethany-Peace UCC at 11952 Bellefontaine Rd. in St. Louis County hosts a clothing sale from 9 - 11 a.m. For sale are used clothing and shoes, some household items, books and toys.

Fill your bag for $1.

Every 3rd Friday of the month: Bingo

2 p.m., Life Care Center of Florissant, 1201 Garden Plaza Dr. For more information, call 314-831-3752.

Saturdays: Yoga

Yoga returns to Calvary UCC at 2501 Hartland Avenue, on Saturdays from 10:30-11:30.

Masks and social distancing are required in the building and participants should bring hand sanitizer with them. For further information call Angela at 314-801-8594.

Saturdays: Toastmasters meeting

Everyone is welcome to attend

CROSSWORD answers from page F-4

www.upstl.org

10

Sports

August 3, 2022 • Community News – St. Louis County • www.mycnews.com

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Sports you see with Gary B...

Hoots addition ready for playoff run The O’Fallon Hoots is a baseball team that plays in the Prospect League in the Prairie League and Division playing their home games in O’Fallon at CarShield Field.

For the Hoots, left-hander Noah Niznik was brought in mid-July and has found success as a starter.

“I’m from St. Louis, so it’s pretty close to home,” said Niznik. “From the get-go, everybody was super welcoming and the guys were great and really friendly.”

CarShield Field is a familiar venue for the lefty, as he won the state championship on that field in 2018 with St. John Vianny High School. He has enjoyed being back home, pitching at a place that has positive memories for him.

“I’ve been around that field quite a bit during my career,” said Niznik. “I like it, I’m comfortable out there and I like the setting.”

After playing in the New England Collegiate Baseball League, Niznik is happy to be closer to home.

Playing in front of friends and family has been enjoyable for the lefty.

In three starts this season, Niznik is 1-0 with a 3.55 ERA in 12.2 innings. He struck out seven in his most recent outing on July 22 against the Springfield Lucky Horseshoes. The lefty picked up his win in a five-inning outing against the Alton River Dragons on July 15, striking out two. * Always need a great pitcher Second key player is signed by the O’Fallon club Every offense needs a spark plug to give it energy.

For the Hoots, that spark plug in the second half has been Lindenwood product Ambrose Russo.

Russo played his first game for the Hoots on June 29, going 1-3 against the Quincy Gems. The California-native started his career at LA Harbor Community College, but found his way to Lindenwood after the COVID-19 Pandemic forced the community

www.hoodsauto.com

college to only play 15 games in Russo’s two seasons.

Before the Hoots, Russo was in the Metro League and was recommended to the Hoots by a coach at Lindenwood.

“It (adjusting) has been a lot better than expected,” said Russo. “The team is super awesome so I was super excited to end up joining the team.”

Despite only standing at six-feet tall, Russo provides plenty of pop. In his 17 games this season, Russo has hit three home runs and two doubles – that’s good for a .500 slugging percentage.

“All of the outside work has helped me unlock this power,” said Russo. “My bat speed is my number one key to getting my power.”

Russo showcased his power recently when he hit a home run over the tall CarShield Field wall in right field. Not only does Russo have power, but he is what some would consider a “five-tool” player. He can hit, hit for power, run, field and throw.

“I try to be an all-around player, especially because I’m not a super-big player,” Russo said. “Having all five tools gives me an advantage in a game.”

On the season, Russo is slashing .280 with three home runs, 14 RBI’s and four stolen bases in five attempts and looks to help the Hoots make a late season push toward the Prospect League playoffs. * Good power in key situations is key

Gary Baute, a St. Louis native, may be educated in business but he lives and breathes sports. As a fan or an athlete, Gary is all sports all the time. He hosted a radio sports program on KFNS, emceed the River City Rascals’ inaugural season, among many other activities. I am currently hosting a Health show on 97.1 FM, ‘Prime Time Health’ www.PrimeTimeSTL.com. It broadcasts Saturday nights at 8 and Sunday mornings at 9.

www.mycnews.com • Community News • August 3, 2022

Recipe: Fresh summer salsa

I

t’s time to kick off summer with a bang. With exciting summer events like baseball, sunbathing and barbecues filling social calendars, comes a whole new array of fresh, sunny day snacks just waiting to be devoured.

If you’re in the mood for something sweet with a hint of spice, try this Citrus, Mango and Pineapple Salsa. It features fresh, fruity flavors from the pineapple, mango, lemon and lime plus a surprising bite of

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– SUDOKU –

jalapeno. It’s the perfect balance of sweet and zesty.

This light, warm weather appetizer is perfect for pool parties or dining al fresco. A fresh twist on traditional salsa, this recipe will have people lining up for a second scoop to help beat the heat.

Enjoy it with tortilla chips or as a topping on your favorite tacos to add a little sweetness to a traditionally savory meal.

Fill in the blank squares in the grid, making sure that every row, column and 3-by-3 box includes all the digits 1 through 9.

Citrus, Mango and Pineapple Salsa Recipe adapted from becomingness.com Ingredients: 1 1/4 cup fresh pineapple, diced 1 1/4 cup fresh mango, diced 2 tomatoes 1/2 red onion, diced 1 jalapeno, finely chopped 1 tablespoon coriander 2 tablespoons lime juice 1 tablespoon lemon juice sea salt, to taste fresh cracked pepper, to taste tortilla chips, for serving

Directions: In large bowl, combine pineapple, mango, tomato, onion, jalapeno, coriander, lime juice, lemon juice and salt and pepper, to taste. With rubber spatula, mix all ingredients together.

Taste and season with additional salt and pepper, if desired.

Serve with tortilla chips.

For more fresh summertime recipes, visit Culinary.net.

SEE ANSWERS ON STL PAGE 7

Tony Dow: everyone’s big brother

M

Movie:

By Steve Bryan

Born and raised in South St. Louis, Steve Bryan is now based in Anaheim, California, and has been allowed access to movie and television sets to see actors and directors at work. Though his writing has taken him far from St. Louis, Steve is, at heart, still the same wide-eyed kid who spent countless hours watching classic movies at neighborhood theaters.

eTV, a free digital station, broadcasts such classic shows as “Gomer Pyle,” “Hogan’s Heroes” and “The Carol Burnette Show.” In the early morning hours, the station scheduled two back-to-back episodes of “Leave It to Beaver,” a classic family sitcom that starred Tony Dow and Jerry Mathers. Born in England, Dow, 77, had been diagnosed with cancer in May and passed away on July 27. He left behind a rich legacy of movie and TV roles.

“Leave It to Beaver” debuted in 1957 and ran for 234 episodes. A real slice of Americana, the series was set in the town of Mayfield. Dow and Mathers played brothers who shared the same room and had the usual arguments, but they always watched out for each other. In the “Captain Jack” episode, for instance, Wally and the Beaver sent away for an eight-foot alligator, but they received a small one instead. Their plan to keep their new pet in the bathtub didn’t work, so they gave it to Captain Jack (Edgar Buchanan), an animal expert who ran an alligator farm.

As the series progressed, Dow’s charac-

though, but Ward Cleaver (Hugh Beaumont) called the restaurant and helped his son look like big shot instead. In another episode, Wally grew a mustache over a school break to impress Julie, who laughed out loud when she saw him. She also made him promise never to grow one again. Julie’s father was a high school teacher and Wally was assigned to his English class.

In the years after “Leave it to Beaver” went into syndication, Tony Dow’s career didn’t slow down. He appeared on such shows as “AdamTony Dow photo courtesy Bigstock. 12,” “My Three Sons,” “Love, American Style” and “Emergency.” Dow ter had more to do when Wally started high also played Ed Greene, father of Patty Greene school and took an interest in girls. His female (Sarah Jessica Parker), in the clever, but shortclassmates also took an interest in Wally, who lived, 1980’s sitcom “Square Pegs.” He was good-looking as well as a basketball, baseball adept behind the camera directing episodes and track star. When Wally became a soda jerk of “Babylon 5,” “Coach” and “The New Leave at the local drug store, his friends Eddie Haskell It to Beaver.” His appearance in the 2003 Da(Ken Osmond) and Lumpy Rutherford (Frank vid Spade film “Dickie Roberts: Former Child Bank) called in a phony ice cream order. Wally Star” had Dow commiserating with other former child stars while playing poker. got sweet revenge in the end, though.

Thanks to reruns, Tony Dow will always be Dow’s character dated several young women throughout the series, in particular Julie Foster everyone’s big brother and best friend. He was (Cheryl Holdridge), a classmate who went on a a talented actor, director and sculptor and will dinner date with Wally. Wally forgot his wallet, be sorely missed.

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COLLECTIBLES

August 3, 2022 • Community News • www.mycnews.com

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PRAYER TO ST. JUDE May the Sacred Heart of Jesus be adored, glorified, loved and preserved throughout the world, now and forever. Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us. St. Jude, Worker of Miracles, Pray for us. St. Jude, Helper of the Hopeless, Pray for us.

Say this prayer 9 times a day for 9 days, then publish. Your prayers will be answered.

It has never been known to fail.

Thank you, St. Jude. R.H.

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August 3, 2022 • Community News • www.mycnews.com

Yeggs

John Hanna

Crossword: The 1970s

‘Yeggs’ is a comic series about Robert and Bill, two rabbits who have opened their own egg franchise in the Midwest (St. Louis area). We follow their day to day lives, watching as they go about the hectic task of preparing for their one big day every year. Along the way they have adventures filled with fun, comic doings and pathos.

By Cindy Moore

Moore on Life My husband and I received an early gift…

COVID. Christmas in July has never been so good. Yeah, no thanks for that Santa!

I’d say it’s a late gift.

We seriously thought we had dodged that bullet and besides; we did everything we were supposed to do.

We masked up like Batman and got the vaccine – multiple times.

Together we got poked more times than a toddler’s finger up its nose holes. Plus, we kept our distance from all humanity…wait! That was my husband, long before the ‘Rona struck. He was anti-social before anti-social was cool.

Really, hasn’t this thing burned out like a supernova long ago? Corona was so last virus.

Monkey Pox is all the rage now. But here we are dealing with it all over again like a bad rerun from a B-movie.

It all started as a little tinge in the throat and from there developed into us blowing the dust off of some old COVID tests.

“After all this time, do you think we have it?”

I asked.

“Naw,” my husband said, “I just really want to finally use some of these test kits.”

The instructions tested our brain cells as well as our mucus.

He read the directions. “Take swab A and stick it into orifice B and swizzle it around until you pass out. Then put swab A into vile C and shake it until it makes a toxic cocktail. Drip a few drops of the noxious slush into tab D. Wait 15 minutes.

If line A shows up you are free and clear to carry on with your life. If line A and B show up you

must encase yourself in bubble wrap and remove yourself from the human race, unless you are husband M (Moore) in which case, carry on with life as usual.”

After mistakenly jabbing ourselves in the wrong orifice (thank goodness we had a few spare tests) we finally got it right and the results showed positive.

It’s been three days of sequestering away from everyone. We could only watch so many episodes of “Law and Order” until “Gilligan’s Island” started looking good. Our bedroom has stacks of cups and plates, old pizza boxes, balled up Kleenexes and half-empty water bottles everywhere. It looks worse that a college frat house after a weekend of partying.

I think we’re finally on the mend. But note to Santa, next Christmas just leave coal.

Gifted

Cindy Moore is the mother of three superlative kids, servant of two self-indulgent felines and wife to one nifty husband. Her ficticious occupation? Archeological Humorist: someone who unearths absurdity and hilarity in strange and unusual places including public restrooms, the lint filter, and church meetings. Most recently, she excavated a find in her neighbor’s bird feeder.

The opinions expressed in this column are Cindy Moore’s alone and do not reflect the opinion of the owners or staff of Community News.

ACROSS

52. *Type of 1970s shoes

23. Young horses

1. Come clean, with “up”

56. Top dog

5. *_____-a-Soup, launched in 1972

57. Laughing on the inside, in a text

24. *One of three 1970s TV crime-fighting women

8. Hefty volume

58. Bye, to Sophia Lauren

12. Maui party

59. *1971’s “Sooner or ____” by the Grass Roots

13. Detective’s assignment

25. Plunder 26. *”I’d like to buy the world a ____” 27. “Semper Fidelis” to U.S. Marines, e.g.

15. Seed covering

60. *”Beneath the Planet of the ____”

16. Dull pain

61. Very light brown

29. Group of nine singers

17. Waltz, in France

62. Research facil.

18. *Francis Ford Coppola’s “The ____”

63. *Progressive rock band of “Roundabout” fame

32. *”Rich Man, ____ Man” miniseries

20. Part of an eye

64. Fishing pole spool

36. *Salvador Allende successor

22. Labor org.

DOWN

38. Chow down

23. *”Feathered” 1970s icon

1. Capture the ____

40. Game official, for short

26. One who delivers coal

2. Continental capital

41. Inflammation of iris

30. *1978’s “Night Fever” spent 8 weeks in this Billboard slot

3. Aforementioned

44. Capital of Senegal

4. Substance with rotten egg smell

46. Footstuffs merchant

5. Secret staAsh

49. Intensely dislikes

34. Type of list

6. Theater employee

50. Architectural drawing

35. Open-mouthed

7. Jury member

51. Prefers

37. Acorn producer 38. Glossy fabric

8. *Olivia Newton-John’s 1978 co-star

52. *Neil Simon’s “The Sunshine Boys,” e.g.

39. Denim innovator

9. Eye amorously

40. Enlist or talk into (2 words)

10. Table hill

53. *”Interview with the Vampire” author

42. Golf accessory

11. Before, to a bard

43. Gracefully thin

13. Can’t-get-it-off-one’s-mind kind

14. One that insists

21. H. pylori consequence

31. Fire-breathing monster, Greek mythology

45. Meat and vegetable stew 47. Stumblebum 48. One way to prepare an egg 50. Chicken pox mark

14. Throat dangler

28. Bye, to Edith Piaf

33. As opposed to mishap

48. North face, e.g.

54. Kate Winslet as ____ of Easttown 55. *”____ Train” 56. *”Thrilla in Manila” winner

19. Winged 22. Charge carrier

SEE ANSWERS ON STL PAGE 7