18 How to take a picture for your new license* Inspired by “renew”
*or really, any ID If you actually want a nice picture: - Get a good skincare routine. I was never formally taught what makes a good skin care routine, but what I do and what I can tell you is this: cleanser, toner, moisturizer, and sunscreen/SPF. AT THE VERY LEAST, and in that order. I know there’s people who do exfoliators, serums, and other things that make me wonder if our skin care routines are what truly differentiate us from our neanderthal ancestors and if that is truly anything to celebrate. But yes. At the very least, cleanser, toner, moisturizer, and sunscreen. It’s done me wonders. - Don’t argue with anyone the night before. Especially your dad. Your dad has a way of getting underneath your skin as his hard headed daughter that no one else has, and much to your dismay, your stubbornness and confidence in your beliefs, whatever your stance in the argument may be, will not be enough to stop you from crying. There is one thing you have to learn and it is this: you cannot change or fix other people. You can only appeal to logic and empathy, but at the end of the day, you cannot change others, and you cannot take on the responsibility of doing such. - Drink water! Another important component of skincare but inner beauty = outer beauty. And also hydration means wrinkles later instead of sooner! So more attractive license pictures and for longer. To cheat the system (Chaperone recommended**): - Get drunk or high (Or cry. Cry alot!) before taking your picture. Any one you choose (or combine! You adventurous son of a bitch.) will yield an unbecoming picture that you will inevitably deny looks like you. I regret to inform you that it will, in fact, look like you, but at least you have a fun story about the time you were at the DMV drunk/high/both. Crying is not as much of a fun story, but at least you know that you’re not as ugly as your license will try to claim. - This works in a couple ways: - (1) If you ever need to present your ID when you are worse for wear (e.g. you’re trying to get into a club but you’ve already pre-gamed a little too hard or any other circumstance where your ID and faking/ imitating sobriety is involved), voilà! Your ID has your “everyday” face on it. And if anyone wants to say, “This is what you usually look like?”, well, the asshole is clear in that situation. - That being said, drink responsibly! While I support fun, I do not endorse drunk driving or any other version of endangering others! - (2) You have a great “before” picture, for whatever the “after” may be. Maybe having a reminder of it may not be the best idea for you, personally, but having that “before” picture yields a very illuminating conversation when people show their true colors about how they felt about your looks before your transformation. Or maybe you’re wearing something that was fashionable for the time and now you can get a good laugh. Maybe this is just a personal note for me, but before I
