The Gamer Gazette #6 (www.TazerCG.com)

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Contents: 

CorkyHD is a new Youtuber and we liked his videos. So help us to welcome Corky to the Tazer family by having a gander at his channel and hopefully like his page. Let us know if he gets out of line, we have a ruler on standby.... (To measure his errors of course).

South Park: The Stick of Truth Game Review

Goat Simulator Mini Review

Magic 2014 Tips #5

Frozen Movie Review

Community Pic of the Month

Announced PC Game Releases (May - June)

News: 

New Photo Albums - The new photo albums on the webpage allow players in the community to not only find pictures much faster and hopefully spur more people to share their gaming adventures with us.

Facebook Comment box - A new Comment box can be found on the Community homepage under the tab "More" allowing you to share your thoughts with both the gamers on the page as well as the ones that follow us on Facebook.

Tazer Sponsors - A new face turned up one day at the office looking lost and hungry, so we adopted the youngster and set him to work.

.... Because reasons - As a little note on the side. One of the Gazette's writers will be indisposed of for a couple months to come, as such the series Magic 2014 Tips might be left out or under new management for the coming month. But we will work to fill in the spot and with any luck we (we say "we" but what we really mean is "he") will be able to perform as normal, be that good or bad.


South Park: The Stick of Truth By Nathan Scullard Hello fellow gamers, and welcome to another Tazer PC Gaming Review. This month I will be covering South Park: The Stick of Truth, and the first thing I need to say, is that I have not yet finished this game, and that is due to the fact that my Gaming PC has been out of action now for about 4 weeks, and so far is not looking like returning anytime soon, which for many different reasons is infuriating! I am missing out on so much Titanfall right now you would not believe how much I miss that game, but to be totally honest there is a game I am missing MORE the Titanfall, and that of course is...Plants Vs. Zombies! Nah, only kidding! It’s South Park: The Stick of Truth. I have always been a fan of South Park and even though I haven’t watched much of it in recent years, it has always been something that I enjoyed watching. So when I heard about the game being released, it immediately tweaked my interest, and I’m sure some of you may have noticed that it was one of our “Tazer Top Picks” Trailers for months.

Now the game has been out a little while and many many people have had a chance to review it and express their opinions on it I would just like to take a second to say...”I bloody told you so!” LOL. I knew the game was going to be good from the off, and not just because I liked South Park. A lot of people were pre-judging the game based on its previous instalments. I’m of course talking about the likes of South Park (1998), South Park: Chef’s Luv Shack (1999) and South Park Rally (2000), we will ignore the more recent arcade attempts at a game that were both abysmal, but them aside, all three of the other games had the same huge flaw... they were terrible! The original game tried to create the beloved characters in a 3D interpretation of the show, which mainly consisted of throwing snowballs at evil rampaging turkeys, a pretty shallow storyline to be fair and a terribly cheap tie-in game that was meant to make money rather than entertain its owners. Chef’s Luv Shack, in

my opinion was a brilliant game, or at least it could have been had it not been for the really irritating Americanised game show style mini games that made up the bulk of the game. But at the same time it was the first time they had been true to the show, not afraid to not tone it down for a the audience. And then they released South Park Rally, in which they totally threw out everything I just said and decided to go back to the child-friendly 3D model <SIGH>.


So I will admit that their gaming history has not been great, but when I started hearing things about the Stick of Truth (SOT), it still tweaked my interest. And the more I found out about it the more excited I began to become, so when I finally bought it, it was make or break time. It was either going to be amazing or a total flop, and I am happy to announce that it was f**king awesome! The game follows a wonderful style of play in which it feels like an immersive interactive South Park episode, and is almost broken

down into the style with sleep dictating the start and end of certain chapters of the story. The story itself is, to start, all about two factions fighting “Dungeons and Dragons Style” over ‘The Stick of Truth’. But with so many side plots and missions the story soon digresses into a hilarious culmination of crazy stuff. Including; Aliens and Anal Probing, Nazi Zombies and Underpants Stealing Gnomes (Hilarious Scene! Those of you who have played the game will know what I mean...). There is a lot more besides that but those are the three main ones I have come across so far, as I have already mentioned I have not yet been able to complete it. The game itself only suffers from one or two minor problems as far as I can see. The first is the occasional glitches in the videos. Several times my character has disappeared in the video clips, either that or he just flickers, which is a real shame because it does tend to

distracted you from the otherwise funny and interesting plot. I have heard of worse glitches than this in the game though. NerdCubed for example, could not play his game to begin with as one of the scenes in the early tutorials just froze and refused to go any further. Apart from the occasional glitch in the game the only other issue I have is with the ‘TurnBased’ (TB) combat system they decided on for the game. I really hate TB systems anyway, I think they are slow and dull, and if you get stuck on one you can’t get past then it can be really frustrating too. However, having said that, the story begins with them in a ‘Dungeons and Dragons’ style game so TB gameplay actually fits quite well with the genre. And it was certainly more interesting than Final Fantasy’s latest instalment...seriously what the hell have they done to that game?! I really am looking forward to finishing this game when I get my main PC back up and running and definitely will be going around getting all the collectibles that are littered throughout the map, which to be honest isn’t huge but still benefits from a good fast travel system, which would otherwise have caused

me to have some real issues with the game due to a lot of the back and forth missions that mean you have to visit several of the map locations on multiple occasions, a trait that would have become very annoying very quickly if it wasn’t for the fast travel system.


A lot of people slate South Park for its bad animation and outdated jokes. But I personally think that South Park is best when taken at face value. It’s a silly, rude and

shallow show on purpose, as is the animation style, and I am pleased to say that the game takes all of that across with it and nothing is lost in translation. So what are you waiting for, give it the benefit of the doubt and let yourself be pleasantly surprised by this amazing game. Thank for taking the time to read my review. If you liked this then don’t forget to check out my new Minecraft Series on our YouTube channel where YOU, yes YOU...can help me choose what to build. See you next month gamers! Byeeeeeee!


optional after all so you don’t HAVE to do them, only if you choose to. So I would suggest if you get this game, have fun and at least try some of the challenges, like I said they are NUTS! And as the game goes on, the aims get better and better as you have to be as destructive as you can in any way you like, and DO mean ANY!

Goat Simulator (Mini Review) Reece Corkhill (CorkyHD) What is Goat Simulator? Goat simulator is basically what it says in the title, a goat simulator. It is a very good but also very strange game to play. It consists of a wide selection of playable goats and just to top it all off, you can also play as an Ostrich and a Giraffe. Weird right? Then you just do what you want. You can head-butt and lick things till your heart’s content. And I’m not joking. The aim isn’t to complete the game, it is to have fun whilst playing the little side challenge, which are so fun as they are really crazy stuff.

I have already played hours and hours of goat simulator, probably way too much and still haven’t completed all of the side challenges yet as I have been having far too much fun without needing to do them much. They are

Since this is my first review, I don’t really know what to write but I would love to play through some of the goat simulator future patches, as there are rumours of some sort of multiplayer. So keep an eye out for them on my channel and of course on the Tazer Channel too. If I could give this game a rating out of 10, I would give it a 6 because although the game is really fun, the game has no actual aim to it which I personally believe it does need in order to give the game some sort of direction.

As far as the visuals go, the graphics aren’t amazing but the gameplay really compensates for that and it seems to me that that is really


what this game is all about...the fun...and licking things. So I rate this game 6/10! Thank you for taking the time read my first review, and if you like this kind of stuff don’t forget to Like, Follow and Subscribe to mine and all the Tazer stuff for more great content.


Hello summoners and welcome back to this month’s Magic tips. This month's tips might be a bit shorter considering the nature of the deck. And I'm going away a bit from the normal decks you get in the game and I wanted to talk to you about the Masks of the Dimir. This was originally an extra deck that came out on launch. The deck is strong if used right but it lacks a lot of strong creatures in my opinion. I think the strongest one in it is a 7/7 golem creature but I'm not going to talk about that. I built this deck in order to mess with my human opponents and not to be the best deck against the A.I. So let me get started then and I hope you like this deck, just a short heads up, all these cards are those I have in the deck myself. So they are not the strongest cards but it’s the build I'm using, and so far, against human opponents, it’s fun. Not the strongest, but fun it is.

First off I wanted the Dimir Guildmage in the deck, not only because it’s the name of the deck but also for its ability. It’s a weak 2/2, but looking at the ability it's worth it. Paying four mana will activate its ability, using a black card will allow you to force one enemy to discard a card, but playing with a blue mana will make you draw

a card. Or for that matter, ANYONE you like to draw a card.

It’s a good ability that ties in with the other cards I use in the deck. Last Grasp is just a basic instant card that I use to debuff those stronger creatures that I can't deal with right off the bat. Giving a strong creature a nice -3/-3 is always a good idea if it's going to be in your face a lot. Not the most amazing card but it has its uses, especially so in this deck with very few high strength creatures in it.

Next card in the deck is Treasure Hunter. It’s a card draw that can potentially draw you a lot or just nothing at all. It works by revealing cards from your library till you run across a basic land card. All cards revealed in this way are then moved to your hand. So it could give you a lot, usually it averages two to four cards in my deck, but there are times when it gives me only one or zero. Still it goes with the deck theme.


The card Mind Rot is a doom for many players as it will force them to throw away two cards every time I use the spell. And I think there are four cards in the deck as I have it. And it’s hilarious every time I have my opponents throw away their winning cards.

Fools Demise is another Aura card that adds to the creature’s survivability. Should enchanted creature die it will be returned to the battlefield under your control. The Aura itself will be returned to your hand, creating the possibility to use it over and over again. And with few big creatures it's important to keep the ones you have alive.

Mark of the Vampire is one of the few Aura cards in the deck, it bestows a nice +2/+2 and lifelink to the creature it’s attached to. With no other way of getting life back in a pinch I felt that I wanted it in the deck just to have an opportunity to use it. And again with the lack of many high strength creatures having something that can give them power is something I like to have.

Another Aura card although not as powerful is Illusionary armour, it gives a creature +4/+4 for a big powerhouse but since it's an illusion it will give it the special rule that we talked about last month. If it becomes the target by a spell or an ability it will be destroyed. So it usually doesn’t last too long unfortunately. Still I need the power in the deck.

Dire Undercurrents ties in to the main theme about the deck, drawing cards or making the enemy throw them away. It's an Enchantment that allows me to draw a card for every blue creature that enter the game under my control I can make the target player draw a card, and for every black creature I can have them discard a card. Very funny and very useful.

Shadow Slice, I like these cards, it causes 3 damage to my opponent and I can put it on a creature card thanks to its Cipher rule. Meaning that every time the creature attacks I can cast the spell for free every time as long as the creature is alive. And while I'm on the subject Mental Vapors has the same Cipher rule but in this one it will make my opponent discard yet another card. They are two cards in basically the same league and with that Cipher rule you can cast them over and over again free of charge.


Now we get to talk creatures again, Necropolis Regent is one of the few good creatures in the deck. Not only is it kind of powerful in its own right it also has a special ability. Every time a creature does damage to an enemy, it will get that many counters on it. So if it does two damage to a player it will get two +1/+1 counters, making them stronger every time they get to do damage. It’s a good card but will in many ways be the target of a lot of spells as your opponent won't let you keep it alive for very long.

Mindleech Mass is one other creature that will become the target of many enemy spells. Not only can it do damage but if it does it will allow you to cast a non land card from their hand for no cost. Allowing you access to their spells and abilities, which is kind of nifty if you ask me.

The last card of this month's deck is Avatar of Will. It's just a 5/6 with flying for the cost of six colourless mana and two blue. However, by now you should have been able to whittle down some of your opponents cards, and if you have they might not have any cards at all. If so this card will get more affordable with a whole six in mana

cost, taking it down to just two blue mana for a 5/6 creature with flying, not so bad.

Just remember to keep your creatures alive, there are more in the deck but they are far from the most powerful, and they might need a bit of back up in order to survive for long.

That’s all for this month's deck, and as always I hope to see you out there. Happy Gaming people.


Frozen (Movie Review) By Nathan Scullard My daughter pestered me for months to watch this film, and finally a couple of weeks ago when the dvd came out, I gave in and bought it for them and was subsequently forced to watch it over and over and over, until all I wanted to do was rip my eyeballs out and eat them. A feeling I beleive I share with many parents on Facebook regarding this movie. Its not that it’s a bad movie, it’s just how much your kids go on and on about it. I’ve never known another movie that spurred such an irritating reaction from children. The story is about two sisters, Elsa and Anna (or Arna as they pronounce it in the movie) who as young children were very close. Elsa has a special gift where she can create and manipulate snow and ice with a touch of her hand. But one day while the girls are playing together Elsa accidently harms Anna with her

power and her parents have to rush Anna to a special shamen who can heal her, but the shamen explains that for Anna’s sake she must have her memory erased of all knowledge of Elsa’s ability so that the same thing does not happen again.

This also forces Elsa to grow up and live a life of solitude, always shying away from human contact and interaction. A trait which confuses and upsets Anna, who cannot understand why Elsa acts this way. But one fateful night their parents are lost at sea, and the two sisters have to once again reconnect for the sake of the kingdom left to them by their late parents. But as expected, not all goes to plan, and when Anna meets an


Although it probably won’t be held in the same esteem as the likes of Beauty and the Beast, Toy Story or Aladdin, it is still a very good disney film and does what every good disney film should do... it inspires droves of children to dare to dream.

interesting and attractive man she immediately falls head over heels in love and announces to Elsa that she is going to marry him after only knowing him for a single day. Understandbly, Elsa loses her cool, but this causes her to lose control of her ability, and she accidently brings on an endless winter and flees the kingdom. The film does have a really great interesting story, and as with all disney movies the characters are memorable and engaging. In fact no matter how much I really want to slate this movie for being so goddamn irratating, it is on the whole a very good film. And I have to say I absolutely loved Olaf, the little snowman character and even after watching this film for the third time, he was the one part of it that didn’t get old or boring.

I did however get a little tired of the rest of the movie, but I am not going to base my opinion of the film on how many times I had to watch it before I got bored, as many films would have bored me after watching them three times.

So, that being said I really can’t give it a bad review just because I myself don’t feel the same way about it as my daughter does, but thats because your not supposed to. I want each and every one of you to think back to a Disney film you saw as a child, I don’t need to tell you which one to think about, because the first one that pops into your head will be the one you loved as a child and felt the most attached to. For me it was Aladdin. Well that is what this film is all about, as is almost every Disney movie on the market. They are about creating memories for kids and for that, I give Frozen a 10/10, as a movie it would probably be a 7.5/10. So just remember that next time your son or daughter goes on and on about Frozen or another film they absolutely love. You were that child once.


“Killing People is Bad! Go and Stand in the corner and think about what you have done!� Thanks to SaintsTerror for this issues Pic of the Month! If you would like YOUR screenshot featured in the Community Pic of the Month, then please go to the Community Homepage on the website and Submit your pictures via the upload function at the bottom of the page. Even though we can't feature all the picture on the Community Pic of the Month we will show all of them on the website's Community Photo Album.


Outlast: Whistleblower PC

Monster Madness Online PC

Action , Adventure Red Barrels May 6, 2014

Shooter Trendy Entertainment May 2014

Kill the Bad Guy PC Tesla Effect: A Tex Murphy Adventure PC Adventure Atlus May 7, 2014

Killer is Dead PC Action Deep Silver May 9, 2014

The Last Tinker: City of Colors PC Action Mimimi Productions May 12, 2014

Wolfenstein: The New Order PC Shooter Bethesda Softworks May 23, 2014

Puzzle Exkee May 2014

1849 PC Simulation SomaSim May 2014

MouseCraft PC Puzzle Crunching Koalas May 2014

Dynasty Warriors 8 Xtreme Legends -Complete Edition PC Action Tecmo KOEI May 2014

Kick-Ass 2 PC Transistor PC Action , RPG Supergiant Games May 20, 2014

Tropico 5 PC Strategy Kalypso Media May 23, 2014

Watch Dogs PC Action Ubisoft May 27, 2014

Action UIG Entertainment May 2014


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