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Volume 420, Issue 69
January 23, 2020
The season of giving
North Carolina men’s basketball team donates wins to programs in need Charity Work Tennis Enthusiast
It’s that time of year. Our favorite time of year. The only time of year that truly matters here in beautiful Chapel Hill, as we can finally prove ourselves after months of telling our fellow ACC schools: “Just wait until basketball season.” But it was getting easy — almost too easy. Beating Dook and little brother NC State just seemed like any other day here in paradise. As a result of this, we Tar Heels have volunteered to take a year off and hang up our Michael Jordan jerseys for a minute to allow these inferior schools to catch up. Behold, charity work. “There is no other reason for UNC to be losing,” said diehard Tar Heels fan Chad Smith. “We are giving other schools a real chance here, and on the plus side, I can get all my gear at Walmart discounted this season.” Basketball god-coach Ray Billiams said he made the decision following another breezy walk in the park over
the Oregon Ducks back in November. “It hit me at the Oregon game,” Billiams said. “I was shaking Dana Altman’s hand after our expected victory, but something didn’t feel right … I felt empty.” The Heels went on to donate the next four consecutive games, with its largest gesture being given to Wofford College (it’s a college in South Carolina, in case you’re wondering). Carolina went on to lose 68-64, going 23-63 for field goals and 6-19 for 3-pointers. Junior forward Garrison Brooks didn’t get the memo, going 8-10 for field goals, but we will forgive that. Thirty-something percent shot accuracy is obviously not the Carolina way, but hey, it’s for the greater good, right? We caught up with star freshman guard Dole Canthony, a beloved Heel who has missed the last eight games due to injury. “It’s whatever,” Canthony said. “I ain’t got class or practice or nothing. I’m chilling.” UNC traveled to Blacksburg Wednesday night to take on Virginia Tech, another team that needed our
PHOTO BY BEA NISS/THE DAILY TAR HELL
help after a recent loss to Syracuse. Our gracious basketball team handed the Hokies a 79-77 double-overtime win. We all know in our hearts that our superior basketball program is doing the right thing. Winning every game
can get tiring, and we need some time to find more room for another natty trophy (remember 2017, Dook?). At the end of the day, the sky will always shine Carolina blue, and by next year we will be back
from our championship hiatus. So I will leave now with a message to all these other schools: take this chance and this gift while you can, because the Michael Jordan jerseys will be back next year, and there will be no mercy.
NC State students discover campuswide mold problem on UNC campus Nick Furry Culture Editor
While visiting Chapel Hill to give trainings on inclusion and diversity, NC State students noticed a pungent smell in each of the buildings they went into, said Scarlett Johamsandwich, a third-year studying environmental engineering. “It was like something was rotting,” Johamsandwich said. “One of our students actually had to go outside for fresh air because he felt sick to his stomach.” Johamsandwich said she asked UNC faculty about the smell, but they didn’t understand the issue. “They were clueless,” Johamsandwich said. “They said, ‘What do you mean? It always smells like this.’” Johamsandwich said she and one of the other presenters, Mark Buffalo, a fourth-year studying molecular biology, astrophysics, biochemistry and nuclear engineering, found the air vents covered in mold. “It looked like something out of a horror movie,” Buffalo said. “There were green spots all over this one air vent we found, like some sort of monster. We knew there had to be more for it to smell as bad as it did. As we kept
walking, each air vent we passed was covered in mold.” At the time, Johamsandwich and Buffalo were in Abernathy Hall, but after finding the source of the stench, they went back to the other buildings to see if those air vents were also covered in black and green spores. “We walked back through Battle Hall, Fordham Hall and Howell Hall, and we looked at the air vents on each floor, and all of them were affected,” Johamsandwich said. “What was so shocking was that these buildings were nowhere near each other. Chapel Hill really has a widespread issue here.” After the October mold outbreak at Granville Towers, a privately owned residence hall at UNC, students living there were relocated to hotels for a few weeks, but Chancellor Kleanin Goosekieshitz said that for an issue this large, the university needs a new plan. “I’ve been working with [NC State Chancellor] Randy [Woodson] to figure out a plan for Chapel Hill students to continue classes at NC State temporarily,” Goosekieshitz said. “Frankly, I’m at a bit of a loss for what to do.” As of now, there is no definite plan for how Chapel Hill will approach this issue, but Goosekieshitz said students,
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GRAPHIC BY ANNA LEE/THE DAILY TAR HELL
faculty and staff will not be allowed on campus while the issue is being handled. According to Cryon Mi, a counselor at Chapel Hill, the mold is the worst in his building.
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“It’s been a basketball season full of tears,” Mi said. “There’s been so much crying, from disappointed freshmen who came here expecting a winning season to seniors who wanted to leave on a high note.”
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Mi said all the crying has left excess moisture in many of the air vents on campus. “I don’t think there’s one person in the UNC family who hasn’t cried at least once a week this season,” Mi said.