Charm Magazine - July/August 2018

A P R I L L B R A N D O N | P I C T U R E T H I S ! | FA S H I O N JULY/AUGUST 2018

COVER STORY

hooked on a

FEELING ALSO INSIDE

women in business:

TONI DUSSEX beauty

HYDRAFACIALS

FLIP-the-ISSUE

Carolyn Northcutt Breast Cancer Survivor

The team at Longview Regional helped Carolyn survive, and thrive.

When Carolyn found a lump in her breast, her doctor recommended a 3D mammogram at Longview Regional Medical Center. The lump turned out to be a form of cancer that required surgery, chemotherapy and radiation. “I had a whole team of people working together to provide care, answer every question, and help my life go on as normally as possible,” said Carolyn. “They even scheduled my treatments around trips to see my grandchildren. The healthcare system at Longview Regional is second to none.”

Contact the Center for Breast Care of Longview Regional Medical Center at 903-232-8596 for information or to schedule your 3D mammogram.

Appointments are on a first-come, first-served basis. A physician order is not required, but the patient must provide a physician’s name when an appointment is made. If the person does not have a physician/provider, a list will be provided for the patient’s selection. All mammogram reports will be sent to the physician/provider and follow-ups are the responsibility of the patient.

Contents JULY/AUGUST 2018

Beauty: Hydrafacial Yields Instant, Lasting Results

Feature: Toni Dussex, Freedom Yoga

8

Fashion: Sweet Summertime

Feature: Finding My Tribe

18

16

Beauty

Features 10

Cover Story: Hooked on a Feeling

16

Women in Business: Toni Dussex, Freedom Yoga

24

Aprill Brandon: Finding My Tribe

8

24

On the Cover

Hydrafacial Yields Instant, Lasting Results

Fashion 18

Sweet Summertime

In Every Issue 14 26

Shop This!

Picture This!

A P R I L L B R A N D O N | P I C T U R E T H I S ! | FA S H I O N MAY/JUNE 2018

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Marian Taylor remembers her father’s patience. They were fishing on a lake in Canada when she lost her pole in the water.

“I started boohooing,” she said. “He said, ‘It’s OK. We’ll get it back,’ and we trolled back and forth with another pole and hook. He caught it and pulled it up out of the brink.”

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JULIETTE GRAVES beauty

FLIP-the-ISSUE

EYEBROW solutions

/JUN

4 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

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CLINIQ UE BROW KEEPER llard

$18, Di

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Spot the Charm Our May/June Spot the Charm winner was Casey Lindley and she received a $100 Visa gift card. Casey spotted the Charm on Page 8 in our last issue!

We invite you to spot a special Charm logo in this edition.

Hint: It’s not in the Picture This! logo or in one of the advertisements.

If you locate it, sign on to mycharmonline.com and click the Spot the Charm link on the homepage.

Good Luck!

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Our picks for the lazy days of summer.

~Julia

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Just burn 30 minutes - 100% insects repelled! From Lampe Berger, the masters of fragrance lamps & oils.

Co Complete lamp & oil starter set $30.

Summer Night Oil 500ml $20.99, full liter just $35.99.

NEVER LOSE YOUR COOL! Corkcicle has all the others beat. This canteen comes in lots of colors and sizes. Keeps beverages cold for 25 hours, hot for 12 (The 25oz canteen holds a bottle of wine). Or sip in style at home or on the go - the triple insulated tumblers and stemless keep your drink cool for 9 hours, hot for 3. No freezing. No cup sweat. No joke!

Priced from $19.95

Our picks for the lazy days of summer.

~Julia

Get ready for a relaxing fun alternative to patio chairs or porch swings! It’s our hammock swing chair! Made of mildew & fade-resistant Sundure fabric in a myriad of great colors & designs, lovingly crafted through a fair trade cooperative in rural El Salvador. $175

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The lightweight formula absorbs deeply, for face, body, and hair. Guys love it as a shaving oil, and leave-on conditioner for grooming beards! $34.

Ot Other faves are Intense Therapy SPF 25 Lip Balm $7.50 and Oil-Free SPF 45 Sun Guard $21.

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CHARM / VIEW JULY/AUGUST 2018 PUBLISHER Stephen McHaney EDITOR Ric Brack • 903.237.7759 • rbrack@news-journal.com MANAGING EDITOR Jo Lee Ferguson • 903.237.7724 • jferguson@news-journal.com ART DIRECTOR Katie Case • 903.237.7715 • kcase@news-journal.com PHOTOGRAPHERS Michael Cavazos • 903.237.7748 • mcavazos@news-journal.com Les Hassell • 903.237.7764 • lhassell@news-journal.com DESIGNER Sara Bryan ILLUSTRATOR Michelle Laverell CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Kristen Barton • Aprill Brandon • Megan Byrd Jo Lee Ferguson • Jim Hardin • Clare McCarthy Amy McHaney • Anntoinette Moore Nishil D. Patel • Ana P. Walker CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHER Courtney Case ADVERTISING DIRECTOR Darla Walker • 903.237.7727 • dwalker@news-journal.com ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Thomas Bonner • 361.574.1249 • tbonner@vicad.com Sylvia Darden • 903.237.7721 • sdarden@news-journal.com Chris Dean • 903.237.7719 • cdean@news-journal.com Kerri Esposito • 903.232.7276 • kesposito@news-journal.com Ginger Lovelady • 903.232.7287 • glovelady@news-journal.com Jeff Martin • 903.232.7221 • jmartin@news-journal.com Tracy Stopani • 903.237.7726 • tstopani@news-journal.com CIRCULATION Josh Hart • 903.237.7765 • jhart@news-journal.com PRODUCED BY TCM PRINTING Sherri Goodwin • 903.232.7245 • sgoodwin@tcmprinting.com SPECIAL THANK YOU TO Models: Valerie Eason, Anna Bryant, Erica Key, & Shelby Hauser Fashion Photo Location: Shivers Natural Snow

mycharmonline.com • news-journal.com

6 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

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HEALTH & BEAUTY

HYDRAFACIAL

YIELDS INSTANT, LASTING RESULTS Words by AMY MCHANEY

I

recently won a HydraFacial MD from Cherry Hill Med Spa at Junior Achievement’s Denim and Diamonds fundraiser. I say won, my husband says

bought. I prefer winning.

I have had a number of facials, but only the kind you might schedule at a hotel spa on vacation. The HydraFacial MD was going to be my first facial with a purpose, my first facial at a med spa. My friend Jennifer has had a number of HydraFacials and is a big fan of the instant results – plumped skin that feels squeaky clean.

My appointment began with VISIA Skin Complexion Analysis, which Cherry Hill uses to track the progress of treatments over time. The machine looks similar to the one that instantly measures your vision at the optometrist, where you lean into the chin rest and stare unblinkingly at the hot air balloon.

The VISIA takes a series of photographs from different angles with a very bright flash. The photos are analyzed and the machine

Mandy Faughn administered my HydraFacial. She is a favorite to many and there is a reason why – she is engaging, puts your mind at ease and is very knowledgeable about the treatments she provides. I settled back in the reclining treatment chair as she explained what the facial would entail. She told me that there would be no down time, no pain and that the HydraFacial MD was appropriate for all skin types.

Mandy would begin with topical cleansing of my face, then follow with two passes of the HydraFacial MD device. The device is like a tiny vacuum cleaner – you feel gentle suction as it is used.

The first HydraFacial MD pass would include a mild glycolic and salicylic acid solution to extract debris and impurities from my pores. The second pass would deliver peptides and antioxidants for hydration. Finally, she would apply a Zo Brightening Mask, which is unique to Cherry Hill’s HydraFacial MD regimen.

The facial itself lasted about 30 minutes – easily doable over a lunch break. One of the most interesting things to see was the vestibule that held the water used during my facial – and all of the impurities that had been drawn out. Mandy said that during pollen season the water that is used is greenish from all the pollen in patients’ pores!

The HydraFacial MD lived up to its billing. My skin felt and looked moisturized and the results were lasting. Mandy recommends monthly treatment for maintenance.

SUMMER BEAUTY

maps your wrinkles, large pores, sun damage, age spots and can

I spent a weekend with college girlfriends, including one

even identify the presence of acne causing bacteria. The “voila”

who recently had a lesson in summer beauty from Austin based

moment is when you learn your skin age … I was feeling pretty

Katherine Crenshaw of Cren De La Cren, beauty by katherine

confident as I feel my skin looks pretty good. The VISIA disagreed

crenshaw. My friend shared lots of Katherine’s ideas for drugstore

– it said I was 47 in skin age, two years older than I actually am!

beauty … so many good ideas that I reached out to Katherine

8 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

myself to learn more. Here are some of her tips for summer beauty on a budget:

If you accent your eyes instead, try a colored liner. When lining the top lid, Katherine says to be sure to keep the line very clean

Katherine says to match your makeup routine to what it’s like

and sharp. A diffused line under the bottom lash smudged with a

outside when the heat turns up in Texas. Look to fresh-faced

brush is on-trend, too. She says either will require tons of mascara!

bronzer and glowy skin with an accent of color on your eyes or

Katherine’s favorite colored liners are: Maybelline Lasting Drama

lips. It’s the simplest formula for an understated yet smoldering

Light Eyeliner Pencil in Moonlight Purple, L’Oreal Infallible

makeup look on a hot summer day.

For the face, start with a tinted moisturizer with an SPF. Katherine recommends Aveeno Positively Radiant CC Cream with Broad Spectrum SPF 30 – it’s an oil free, medium coverage color correcting cream with a mousse-like texture that is easy to apply. For redness or blemishes Katherine recommends Maybelline’s Instant Age Rewind Concealer. Set the concealer with a translucent powder such as E.L.F.’s High Definition

Paints Eyeliner in White Party, Intrepid Teal and Jet Set Blond. If those colors seem a bit out there, try changing up your everyday brown or black with a plum, navy or dark steely grey. Katherine says a nude lip is the best way to balance out a bold eye.

Finally, add a bit of the Lumi Glotion in one of the lighter colors on your brow bone, inner corners of the eyes, top of your cheek bones and on the Cupid’s bow to top off the summery look! C

Pressed Powder along your T-Zone.

To keep skin glowy along the outside of your face, add L’Oreal’s True Match Lumi Glotion Natural Glow Enhancer in Medium or Deep along the hairline, under the cheekbones and along the jawline, adding just a dab on the bridge of the nose. Blend the product with your fingers or damp sponge.

Katherine recommends choosing to play up one feature – either eyes or lips – when adding an accent color, keeping the rest of the face bare or monochromatic to keep the bronzy glow in balance. For lips she recommends a full gloss, a stain, balm or matte lip in the hot weather, and likes Maybelline’s lip product line for its large range of textures and colors. Some of the fun colors Katherine recommends are: Maybelline Vivid Matte Liquid in Orange Obsession or Fuchsia Ecstasy, Matte Metals in Copper Spark or Molten Bronze, and L’Oreal Lip Paints in 300, a cool bright orchid purple.

Water vestibule used during the HydraFacial MD procedure

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mycharmonline.com 9

COVER STORY

Marian Taylor at Tyler State Park 10 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

HOOKED on a feeling Words by JO LEE FERGUSON | Photos by LES HASSELL

M

arian Taylor remembers her father’s patience.

They were fishing on a lake in Canada when she lost her pole in the water.

“I started boohooing,” she said. “He said, ‘It’s OK. We’ll get it

back,’ and we trolled back and forth with another pole and hook.

He caught it and pulled it up out of the brink.”

That was her father, though. Gary Ashmore didn’t get mad. He didn’t throw a fit. Learning to fish with him was never stressful.

“Daddy was always real patient. He explained stuff to you. He was real easy going,” Taylor said of her father. Fishing was about having fun, regardless of whether they caught anything. “You got to carry on good conversations.”

It’s those kinds of relationships, and the joy of being outdoors, that are found at the heart of a love several East Texas women described for their fishing hobby. It’s a hobby that has them standing on the banks of lakes, in the clear, cool waters of a running river, on boats and on trips to feed their addiction to throwing a line in the water.

continued on pg. 12  mycharmonline.com 11

“Fishing in general is a great sport because any age can do it, any economic level can do it,” said Taylor, a Henderson legal assistant. “It’s something that can be enjoyed by everyone. ... I try to encourage as many people as I can to get into the sport. You can fish from the banks. I know a lot of people that do bank fishing and do a good job at it.”

Katheryn Courville, though, isn’t happy just standing on the banks of a river or lake. Fishing is a good excuse to stand in the clear waters of a river — although she didn’t find that excuse until she was well into adulthood.

“My dad is from Montana, and we would go up there every summer.

Marian Taylor with her parents, Gary and Kathleen Ashmore, with a catch in Canada. (Special to Charm)

I love it so much up there, and the rivers are so inviting,” Courville said.

“They’re cool and they run real fast, and there’s clear water and they’re rocky and they’re beautiful.”

Her father didn’t teach her to fish when she was a child, she recalled.

She sought the hobby as an adult, with lessons from a fly shop when she was living in Austin 20 or 25 years ago. Now, she and her father do sometimes fish together.

“I encourage all dads out there to take their daughters fly fishing — any kind of fishing,” said Courville, a registered nurse who teaches in the nursing program at the University of Texas at Tyler’s Longview University Center. “I think it’s a great way to be outside. It’s a great skill to have.”

She now takes a couple of trips each year to go fly fishing in Broken Bow or Beaver’s Bend, for instance. She and her boyfriend have been fly fishing in Alaska or Montana, as well.

Katheryn Courville showing off a catch while fly fishing for red fish on Laguna Madre near Port Isabel and South Padre Texas. (Special to Charm)

Courville lives on Lake Cherokee, where she can cast off her dock or even fly fish in the lake.

“It’s not the same as river fishing,” she said, later saying she doesn’t catch a lot. That doesn’t bother her because she’s “just happy to be outside.”

“I love so much being in the water with the waders on, feeling the cold water.”

Courville is a member of East Texas Fly Fishers, a group she said consists of mostly men. Members love teaching people, she said.

“There’s an art to casting,” letting the line drop and then pulling it back up, she said. “It’s very active. It’s not like throwing a line out and sitting there and waiting for something to bite.”

The key is the “fly” at the end of the line that resembles something fish eat and making it move in a way that attracts the fish, convincing them it’s something they’d like to eat, Courville said.

“You’re constantly casting and moving, walking up the river bank.

You’re constantly moving,” she said.

Sharla Hodges lives at Lake Cherokee as well, where her favorite fishing spot is out of her boat dock. She grew up in Amarillo, where there

Sharla Hodges shows off her salmon catch in northern British Columbia, Canada. (Special to Charm) 12 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

wasn’t a lot of water for recreation, but her parents and grandparents introduced she and her siblings to fishing.

Fishing

“

in general is a great sport because any age can do it, any economic level can do it.”

- Marian Taylor

“We had four kids in my family, so it was kind of hard for my family to do a whole lot with us in the summer, so fishing and camping were fabulous,” she said, recalling trips to Colorado where they would trout fish. “We had a good time.”

The retired school teacher said that when she and her husband,

trips to places such as the Snake River in Indiana, and they fish at the Ferndale Club, a private fishing and hunting lodge near Pittsburg.

For many years, she would simply catch and release the fish — until she learned there were more ways to eat fish than just frying them.

Mark, got married about 38 years ago, they spent their honeymoon

“You just bake it, and it’s delicious,” she said.

fishing on the White River in Arkansas. He had been around the

Taylor said her children, too, grew up fishing, and now they

water even more than her and knew a lot about fishing.

“We were short on cash, so that’s what we did,” Hodges recalled of her honeymoon. “We caught fish, ate them at night. Back then, it was by the hair of your chinny chin chin.”

She and her husband lived in Tennessee early in their marriage.

They and their two children “had plenty of fishing time” on the lakes there when their children were young.

“There were so many lakes. We would rent house boats for vacation and just go out on the house boat and fish and swim,”

take their grandchildren as well. She and her husband, Johnny, became “more serious” about it a few years ago, investing in a boat they take to Canada. They also have an RV parked at Lake Fork, and she said a family lake near Mixon has some of the best fishing.

They fly fish, too, but she still prefers bass fishing with a baitcasting rod and reel. Between conventional and fly rods, she said she probably has 10 or 12 fishing rods.

Still, fishing well isn’t about equipment, the women agree. It’s

Hodges said. “It wasn’t a strange situation to bring fishing into it,

about ability, but it’s also a lot of luck — the right time, the right

because we were around so many lakes. It was a lot of fun.”

place and the right weather.

Now, their children are grown and married with children

“I don’t think about anything else when I’m fishing. It distracts

of their own, and the Hodgeses are working to make sure their

me from everyday life,” Taylor said. “I don’t worry about what

grandchildren grow up fishing.

bills have to be paid or what my house looks like or that I should

She and her husband typically visit British Columbia each year and take time to fish while they’re there. They’ve also taken fishing

be cleaning it. When I’m out on the water ... it’s all about catching that big fish.” C mycharmonline.com 13

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F EATURE

WOMEN in business: TONI DUSSEX Freedom Yoga

Words by MEGAN BYRD | Photo by MICHAEL CAVAZOS

S

trong, passionate and warm-hearted:

in Longview, after her yoga teacher talked

client. Yoga member Abby Simpson said she

that’s Toni Dussex and her new

her into training for Yogafit for Warriors, a

benefits from these classes.

business, Freedom Yoga in Longview.

program designed for people with PTSD.

“You go in her studio and you immediately

After suffering from post-traumatic

“I feel connected with people that have

feel warmth and comfort....” Simpson said.

stress disorder when her first husband

[PTSD] issues because I’ve been through it,”

“Everything she does comes from her heart.”

died unexpectedly in 2003, Dussex sought

Dussex said. “I understand what that’s like

Classes cater to varying schedules, as

alternative treatments to medications. She

and what that feels like.”

discovered yoga supports mental, spiritual and physical healing.

“I took every medication, I was in therapy, and finally just got tired of being medicated

there classes are seven days a week, with

Soon after, Dussex decided to start

different styles and levels taught throughout

her own business. Client Scott Peters

the day. For people who are active-duty

describes her as an entrepreneur and a

military, veterans, and first responders,

supportive person.

membership fees are donation-based.

all the time and living the way I was living and

“It’s a big risk when you start your own

Dussex said she is excited to introduce

feeling the way I was feeling,” Dussex said.

business, and to do it, you’ve got to be really

yoga to new members and encourages

“I started researching alternative treatments

passionate about it,” Peters said.

people of all ages and backgrounds to

for PTSD and trauma and depression, and

Happily remarried and enjoying life with

yoga kept popping up as the latest research

her 16-year-old-son and great dane, Dussex’s

“You make yoga work for your body; you

for those things.”

passion for her business and supporting the

don’t make your body work for it,” Dussex

community shines.

said. “Yoga is for everybody. I have students

Now she shares her findings with the community.

“I found my calling,” Dussex said. “I’m

try classes.

all the way from 5 to 80.”

“When I was diagnosed with PTSD, I

really proud that I’ve created exactly what I

Dussex has plans to move into a larger

thought I was always going to have PTSD. I

wanted to create — this environment where

building under construction near her studio.

went years without doing anything,” Dussex

people can heal and create new relationships,

There, she plans to add aerial yoga to the

said. “I didn’t think that was anything that

a place where people can feel safe, good,

class offerings as well as possible massage

anyone could ever overcome or heal from.

healthy, and just better.”

therapy and counseling rooms.

I love showing people that we don’t have to

Dussex teaches a combination of

For more information, check out the

have that, that there’s alternative treatments

different yoga styles, including vinyasa,

Freedom Yoga Inc. Facebook page, website,

for those things.”

restorative, gentle, and specialty yoga for

or download the MINDBODY app and

Dussex worked as a yoga instructor for

people with disabilities. She also offers

search Freedom Yoga Inc. to view class

four years at the Institute for Healthy Living

optional private classes personalized to each

descriptions and instructor bios. C

16 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

Cover Reveal Party

Thursday, August 16th, 2018 • 5-7PM

? ?

VIEW

Get a Sneak Peek at the Cover of the Next Charm/View Magazine and Get in Touch with Your Own Creativity at Create Art. Enjoy Beverages by Heritage Wine & Spirits and Delectable Desserts by La Cabane de Dessert.

CREATE ART & LA CABANE DE DESSERT

4315 Gilmer Rd., Longview

Sponsors HERITAGE

WI N E & SPI RI TS

mycharmonline.com 17

FASHION

Valerie Eason, Shivers Natural Snow Skirt by KanCan, $49.95 Shirt by Gimmicks, $56.95 Georgia Grey Shoes by Vintage 93, $49.95 Bracelet by Leatherock, $39.95

18 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

sweet

summertime Photos by MICHAEL CAVAZOS

These summer looks from the Buckle in Longview Mall are hot. Thankfully, Shivers Natural Snow in Longview is around to cool things down. (Shivers also has locations in Hallsville and a new one in Lakeport.)

Thanks to the Buckle, Shivers and these ladies of Shivers for helping Charm magazine throw some shade on this summer’s heat.

Erica Key, Shivers Natural Snow Overalls by KanCan, $49.95 Shirt by Gilded Intent, $39.95 Sunglasses, $12.95 Sandals by Farylrobin, $39.95 Bracelet, $14.95

CHARM FASHION SPONSORED BY Anna Bryant, Shivers Natural Snow Shirt by Gimmicks, $54.95 Caylin H202 Shorts by Buckle, $134 Bralette by Free People, $20 Giselle Shoes by Vintage 93, $49.95 Belt by Nocona, $59 Necklace, $14.95

mycharmonline.com 19

Shelby Hauser, Shivers Natural Snow Jeans by KanCan, $59.95 Shirt by Gimmicks, $58.95 Bralette, $19.95 Big Pine Wedge Sandals, $59.95 Necklace, $16.95 Bracelet, $14.95

20 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

See more Fashion on

mycharmonline.com 21

endless SUMMER

vibes

@PETERSLONGVIEW 22 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

2018 Jeep Wrangler Unlimited

mycharmonline.com 23

F EATURE

finding my tribe Words by APRILL BRANDON | Illustrations by MICHELLE LAVERELL

I

thought it was like riding a bike. Or shotgunning a beer. That

But after that I’m pretty much useless. What’s the next step?

it was a skill, once mastered, couldn’t be forgotten. But then,

Text them? I guess. But underneath their name I usually put

at the age of 36 and a mom of two young children, I realized I

something like “Chick from playground” or “Blonde Lorelai

had forgotten how to make friends.

I mean, I have friends. Of course I have friends. Lots of them.

In fact, according to Facebook, I have more than 1,400 friends.

Gilmore” because I never actually listen when I ask someone their name. And if by some miracle I do remember their name, I forget how to write a text like a normal human.

So, yeah, I’m doing just fine, thankyouverymuch.

Except, thanks to our semi-nomadic life, these friends live in Ohio. And Texas. And Colorado. And Oregon. And dozens of other places.

I also managed to snag a few wonderful local friends right here in Boston before I got pregnant for the first time and turned into a permanent swamp witch. Except they are younger, or older, and childless, or their kids are grown. And also I keep forgetting to contact these wonderful local friends to hang out in real life

Hello. Maybe sometime henceforth we could, whenever is convenient for you, of course, together our offspring get for a coffee. Or a beer. Or nine beers. Not that I’m an alcoholic or anything. LOL. OK. Well.

You have neat eyebrows. random gif of Chris Pratt from Jurassic Park.

because all my time and brain power is now spent cutting up fruit my kids are BEGGING for, and then cleaning the mess from all that cut-up fruit that they did NOT eat but felt needed to be spread all throughout the house.

I’m also on friendly terms with our downstairs neighbors.

Whenever we see each other. Which is roughly twice a year.

It also doesn’t help that I am awful at first impressions. Just awful.

The reasons for which I’ve narrowed to the following three things.

One, I have a major case of Resting Murder Face. Some people look wistful when they daydream. I look like I want to murder you and your entire family and then will strangle your

It’s not like I can’t talk to people. I’m not what you would

pet in front of your lifeless corpses. Two, whenever I do smile,

describe as shy. I can strike up an awkward conversation with the

I smile weird because I hate my teeth, which really only adds

best of them. And on really good hair days, I can even score a hot

to the illusion that I’m probably a secret serial killer. And three,

mom’s digits.

when I’m nervous (like, say, when I’m meeting new people for the

24 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

first time) I always think of the perfect thing to say roughly three

You can imagine my surprise, then, when one did.

minutes after I should have said it (which you would think would

It was a chilly spring afternoon. A group of them descended on

stop me from saying it, but no, no it doesn’t).

the playground. I’d seen most of them around the neighborhood

So now, without the crutch of school or a regular 9-to-5 job

from time to time. Made small talk with some of them over the

where people are forced into close proximity to me on a regular

years. Which is how this encounter started. But then, just like

basis (and thus are eventually able to see through all these quirks

that, they let me in. Within 20 minutes, they had added me to

to my much more endearing quirks), I found myself struggling to

their Facebook Messenger group. Within 45, I’d been invited to

make friends with other parents.

their weekend barbecue.

For a long time I told myself I didn’t need friends. It’s 2018, man.

And that’s all it took. I had found my tribe.

We, as a society, are beyond friends. That’s why memes and Netflix

And it’s made all the difference.

and mermaid blankets and boxed wine with straws were invented.

My kids now have neighborhood kids to hang out with. My

Coping mechanism, you know?

husband has other husbands to stand over cooking meat and say

But you do. You really do need friends. At every age. And

meat cooking things about. And I...well, I can finally smile my real smile, forgetting how much I hate my smile for awhile.

every stage.

I’d see these groups of parent-friends talking and laughing

Loneliness is a real epidemic. As adults we don’t like to talk

at places like the library and the park. Just go up and talk to

about this. For too many of us it conjures up too many horrific

them, I’d tell myself. You’re a grown-up. This isn’t like third

childhood memories of bullies and not fitting in and birthday

grade. They won’t make fun of you because you’re wearing the

parties where you were terrified no one would show up.

wrong color scrunchie. But then my oldest would start yelling

But we should talk about it. And address it. Because not

“MOMOMOMOM!” and I’d realize my youngest was running

everyone is as lucky as I am and has a circle of friends that reaches

straight toward traffic and the moment passed and we’d head

in, deus ex machina, and saves you from your loneliness. And tells

home. Friendless.

you, in big ways and small, that you are great, just the way you are.

Secretly though, I was always hoping one of these groups would take pity on me and adopt me. It was a fantasy I often had while staring off into space (and looking like I wanted to murder you). That they would see

And will agree that yes, your kids are being total buttheads today.

Everyone deserves to have people in their life like that.

So, here’s to hoping you have found your tribe to help you get through the long days and short years of

me sitting there by myself and just swoop in and

parenthood. And if you haven’t yet, hang in there.

take me under their collective wing and say “let’s

It will happen. And if it doesn’t it, approach that

go get a beer, or nine, and by the way, you have

lonely mom sitting all by herself and start the tribe yourself. C

neat eyebrows.”

IS

CELEBRATING 60 YEARS

.ORG

215 East Tyler Street

LMFA COLLECTION Wellington Lee, In the Morning, East & West 1974

mycharmonline.com 25

PICTURE

This!

CHARM/VIEW

COVER REVEAL PARTY

SHELIA MILLER, BEVERLY GUEST

LONGVIEW | HERITAGE WINE & SPIRITS | 4/19/2018 Photos by MICHAEL CAVAZOS

Charm and View magazines celebrated the reveal of the May/June covers during a special event April 19 at

ANGELIA BECK, LESLIE PORTLEY

Heritage Wine & Spirits in Longview.

Don’t miss out on the cover reveal party for our September/October edition, which will be 5 p.m. to 7 p.m. Aug. 16 at Create Art and La Cabane de Dessert, 4315 Gilmer Road in Longview. Heritage Wine and Spirits will be the event’s beverage sponsor.

JULIETTE & ERIC GRAVES

DOMANIQUE INGRAM, YOULANDIA HOLLAND

26 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

ZOE STEEL, GINNY GOULD

P ICTURE THIS

DEBUTANTE

DR. JOSEPH & BETSY PISTONE

BALL LONGVIEW | MAUDE COBB CONVENTION AND ACTIVITY CENTER | 5/26/2018 Photos by LES HASSELL

Longfellows presented six young women as debutantes during its 36th annual Debutante Ball on May 26.

Longfellows formed years ago to enhance Longview’s cultural environment through an annual ball in which the debutantes would be presented. Since then, more than 200 daughters and granddaughters of members have been presented CONNER & LARA CUPIT

as debutantes. Debutantes have completed their freshman year of college. They have been active in school organizations and volunteered in the community.

This year’s debutantes are: Susannah Seary Abernathy, Erin Elizabeth Flanagan, Katherine Rayne Spurrier, Abigail Gage Wrather, Mary Katherine Darby and Madeline Claire Duvall.

DAVE SPURRIER, KAYDEE COX

DARIN LAIR, KERRY HIGGINBOTHAM

MARTHA RUFF MURRAY, PATTY GAGE

CLAIRE HENRY, KEYEA WEBSTER

mycharmonline.com 27

P ICTURE THIS

BLUE JEANS

& BALL GOWNS LONGVIEW | MAUDE COBB CONVENTION AND ACTIVITY CENTER | 4/14/2018 Photos by MICHAEL CAVAZOS

East Texas CASA — Court Appointed Special Advocates — raised $85,000 during its annual Blue Jeans & Ball Gowns fundrasier, held April 14 at the Maude Cobb Convention and Activity Center.

The event features a dance competition with local celebrities. This year’s dancers were: 124th District Court Judge Alfonso and Melissa Charles; 307th District Court Judge Tim Womack and Amy Canton; Jim Bartlett and Neely

TERRY & BRENDA ROBBINS

Smith; Leisha Brooks and Steven Collins; Michelle Gilley and Don Esch; Gladewater Municipal Court Judge Donna Blalock and Steven Collins; Josh Mandreger and Rachel Brabham; David Shelton and Kayla Bonina; Christina Hollwarth and Tyler Lohr; and Randy and Dionne Lott.

JEFF & KAREN JOHNSON

MIKE & DEBBIE TRICKEY

TRACY & MATTHEW BRYAN

28 CHARM | J U LY / AU G U S T

BRITTANY & JERRY RAMSEY

P ICTURE THIS

DENIM &

DIAMONDS

LONGVIEW | A.P. AND SUSIE MERRITT’S RANCH | 4/7/2018 BRANDI RUSSELL, KACEY POWELL

Photos by MICHAEL CAVAZOS

Junior Achievement of East Texas held its 15th Annual Denim and Diamonds fundraiser on April 7 at A.P. and Susie Merritt’s Ranch.

President Lynne Henderson said the event, which included dinner and entertainment, raised a net of $38,000 that is used to support financial literacy, entrepreneurship and work readiness programs in area schools.

The organization served almost 8,000 students with 374 community volunteers in East Texas schools this past year.

DR. DEREK CEGELKA, NEELY SMITH

JUSTIN & JENNIFER HEARRON

JESSICA & JUSTICE BATES

WILLIAM MCWHORTER, VIVEK PATEL, NISHIL PATEL

mycharmonline.com 29