Mendham Life October 2021

The DeFazio Flanagan Team Denise Flanagan Cell: 973.420.4590 dflan2015@gmail.com

Margaret DeFazio Cell: 201.738.7636 medefazio@gmail.com

No. 19 Vol. 8

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October 2021

Are There Different Types of Breast Cancer?

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illions of women are diagnosed with breast cancer every year. According to the Breast Cancer Research Foundation, more than 2.3 million women across the globe were diagnosed with breast cancer in 2020. The BCRF also notes that breast cancer is the most frequently diagnosed cancer among women in 140 of 184 countries worldwide.

Breast cancer statistics can give the impression that each of the millions of women diagnosed with the disease is fighting the same battle, but breast cancer is something of an umbrella term. In fact, there are various types of breast cancer, including ductal carcinoma in situ, invasive ductal carcinoma, inflammatory breast cancer, and metastatic breast cancer. Learning about each type of breast cancer can help women and their families gain a greater understanding of this disease.

Ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS) DCIS is a non-invasive cancer that is diagnosed

when abnormal cells have been found in the lining of the breast milk duct. The National Breast Cancer Foundation notes that DCIS is a highly treatable cancer. That’s because it hasn’t spread beyond the milk duct into any surrounding breast tissue. The American Cancer Society notes that roughly 20 percent of new breast cancer cases are instances of DCIS. Invasive ductal carcinoma (IDC) IDC is the most common type of breast cancer. The NBCF reports that between 70 and 80 percent of all breast cancer diagnoses are instances of IDC. An IDC diagnosis means that cancer began growing in the milk ducts but has since spread into other parts of the breast tissue. This is why IDC is characterized as “invasive.”

Though IDC can affect people, including men, of any age, the ACS notes that the majority of IDC cases are in women age 55 and older.

Inflammatory breast cancer (IBC) The NBCF describes IBC as an “aggressive and fast

Women diagnosed with breast cancer may each face a different battle, as there are many different types of the disease.

growing breast cancer.”

Breastcancer.org notes that IBC is rare, as data from the ACS indicates that only about 1 percent of all breast cancers in the United States are inflammatory breast cancers. Many breast cancers begin with the formation of a lump, but Breastcancer.org reports that IBC usually begins with reddening and swelling of the breast, and symptoms can worsen considerably within days or even hours. That underscores the importance of seeking prompt treatment should any symptoms present themselves.

Metastatic breast cancer Metastatic breast cancer may be referred to as stage IV breast cancer. When a

woman is diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer, that means the cancer has spread, or metastasized, into other parts of the body. The NBCF indicates that metastatic breast cancer usually spreads to the lungs, liver, bones, or brain. Symptoms of metastatic breast cancer vary depending on where the cancer has spread. For example, if the cancer has spread to the lungs, women may experience a chronic cough or be unable to get a full breath.

These are not the only types of breast cancer. A more extensive breakdown of the various types of breast cancer can be found at https://www.breastcancer.org/symptoms/types.

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• Crowns and Bridges full-mouth rehabilitation, a free consultation with Dr. Goldberg s 2 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com • Page Smile Makeovers • Sedation SedationDentistry Dentistry: No Reason To Fear Dental Work Anymore!

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due to anxiety and fear? you will have no amnesia (meaning you level of anxiety, and the greatest level of Sedation Dentistry offers the fearful will remember the procedure), and you amnesia. Again, you will be required to patient a way to get through dental may also drive yourself home. have a driver bring you to and from the treatment in a relaxed, comfortable OCS: ORAL CONSCIOUS SEDATION: dental appointment. manner.

Years of dental problems This level of sedation, also known as You may already know which sedation can be eliminated in just one or a few “Oral Sedation” or “Enteral Sedation,” is option suits you best. If you’re wondering appointments, where fear and anxiety now the most common technique used in about the next step to learn more, give us are significantly decreased, or even the U.S. and Canada to diminish patient a call at Morris County Dental to meet with eliminated! fears. Medication is taken orally, and us for a free consultation, and we can talk We have many patients who have relaxation ensues. The next day you will more: its an easy first step to improving started out with severe phobia, but as time likely have either full or partial amnesia your oral health! has passed, the anxiety has decreased (meaning you won’t remember some or Dr. Goldberg is a general dentist located significantly.

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You will in dental implants. PleasePlease visit hisvisit website Goldberg dentist with credentials in multiple organizations. his websit of relaxation. As soon as the procedure be monitored by the anesthesiologist at www.morriscountydentist.com for is completed, the gas is turned off and throughout the procedure. Among the 3 additional information. He can be reached you return to a normal level of alertness. options presented here, you will have the at 973-328-1225 and at frontdesk.mcda@ Unlike the other options described below, most relaxation, the least fear, the lowest gmail.com

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Long Valley Man Takes to the Skies with US Marines

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By Damian Veazey famous painter once said, “Once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return.” Every pilot across the globe would totally agree with Leonardo DaVinci’s famous quote about flight. Alec DiLullo of Long Valley, the middle child with an older and younger brother, also wants to experience that feeling and had his eyes on the skies at an early age.

The 22-year-old College of New Jersey graduate feels like he’s now well-prepared to join the pilot ranks. In addition to his degree, he’s also an Eagle Scout which gave him leadership experience early in his life.

DiLullo graduated from college last May and was commissioned in August by the United States Marine Corps. He’s a second

lieutenant awaiting orders to go to Quantico, a Marine Corps base near Triangle, Virginia. “I’ll be completing my basic officer training at Quantico for six months and focusing on flight contracts before I go to the Naval Air Station in Pensacola, Florida for flight school,” said DiLullo. He already has his eye on flying a specific aircraft, but the type of aircraft might surprise you.

He will explain that later.

Until he receives his orders to report to Quantico, he’s working in the U.S. Marines recruiting office in New Brunswick and expects his orders to arrive any time between now and May. It has always been his dream to fly, but it became his career plan and a chance to serve his country. “I’ve always had the vision I wanted to serve since I was a child, but I had some roadblocks if you will, said DiLullo. “My physique, I thought I was too light to go

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DiLullo says his only real connection and exposure to the military was his uncle, who served 28 years in the Marines. He loves flight, but says he mostly decided to serve because it sounded cool and he wanted to do something different.

DiLullo says his parents were shocked at first, but they now recognize that he truly wants to do it. “I’ve lived a good life and now I want to give back,” he said.

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into the service, but when I got into college I put on some weight, and I joined the crew team and started to row, and I put on more weight. So, once I did that, I thought maybe I had a shot at doing this.” That thought of having a shot occurred during his freshman year and that is when he officially decided to make a push for it.

Now, back to the type of aircraft that interests DiLullo.

“I will be exposed to all of the aircraft that Marines fly, but my preference is helicopters,” said DiLullo.

“I am just not a huge fan of flying planes, if something goes wrong, yes, you can glide if you are not in that much trouble, but you are figuring out what the issue is on the fly, literally. You know, I don’t like that. I like to be in a more mobile vehicle that I can take my time and hover. A lot of my Marine friends disagree and want to go planes all the way, but I’m

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Not All Headaches are Created Equal

lmost everyone has experienced a headache, at some point in their life, to varying degrees. In fact, roughly 45 million Americans suffer from Headaches each year. In today’s world, most people reach into the medicine cabinet for one of the various pain relievers to alleviate their head pain. But what happens when that doesn’t work? Or, the headaches become more frequent and more painful? Some get headaches so often and so painful, they even take prescription drugs with side effects and no avail. But have you ever stopped to think, “What is causing my headache?” Headaches and more severe headaches, known as Migraines, can be caused by various triggers including foods, chemicals or preservatives in foods, allergens in the environment, chemicals in cleaning products or herbicides/pesticides, sinus congestion, tension in the neck or jaw, lack of sleep, dehydration, stress, and the list goes on… Sometimes the cause is completely unknown and with no relief the patient can be left hopeless, debilitated and in pain. An assessment by an Acupuncturist can often identify and treat imbalances (that are causing the headaches) that are unknown to the patient previously.

In Chinese Medicine not all headaches are created

equally. Rather, during an assessment, we evaluate the individual patient on many levels to determine their exact symptoms (i.e Is the headache frontal? One sided? Behind the eyes? Is there nausea? Frequency and intensity of pain?....) and if there are any triggers. We take a whole body approach and assess the patient’s physical condition as well as their constitution, emotional health, diet and lifestyle. Unlike the blanket treatment western medicine offers which is typically some type of pain reliever, Chinese Medicine finds a specific treatment for each patient based on their individual symptoms. Five patients suffering “headaches” may receive five completely different treatments. By addressing the root cause, Acupuncture can be a safe way to prevent and treat various types of headaches, without the unwanted side effects of medications.

Based on the individual assessment and diagnosis, tiny needles are inserted into various points on the body. Depending on the case, small electrodes can be attached to specific needles that elicit a small electrical current. The feeling of the electric stimulation on the needles is a comfortable sensation that generally elicits a feeling of tingling, tapping or heaviness. The electric stimulation en-

hances the release of specific neurochemicals which aids in the treatment of headaches. The needles are typically retained for 20-30 minutes, during which the patient is left to relax and take a nap.

Acupuncture is known to be effective and can offer long standing results, but it is not always a quick fix. Especially if the headaches are chronic, several treatments may be required to achieve the full result. Again, this is because it is addressing the root cause and not just covering up symptoms like other treatments.

If you suffer from headaches or migraines start getting relief today! Use the following tips to achieve long- lasting results for a healthy life: Be aware, track food and environmental triggers to see if there are any patterns, get adequate sleep, eat a healthy diet rich in vegetables and fruits (limiting sugars and processed foods), drink plenty of water, manage stress with things like meditation and try Acupuncture!

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Morristown Antiques Dealer Appears Regularly on Antiques Roadshow

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By Steve Sears ntiquing is recycling at its highest.”

The above words are courtesy of Sarah Churgin, owner of Morristown’s Acquisitions Fine Jewelry and Antiques, who is a chef by trade, and was even the first female chef for Manhattan’s Tavern on the Green Restaurant.

“I was no Anthony Bourdain, but I was in that same circle,” she says.

Churgin, in addition to owning her store, as well as owning the building the houses the Bargain Box Thrift Boutique at 1117 Mount Kemble Avenue in Harding Township, also appears often on the popular television show, Antiques Roadshow. Now in her 10th season, Churgin recently taped with the show in Connecticut, and this month will be in Hamilton, New Jersey. “There are a lot of us,” she says, “and they select groups; they select a collection of jewelry viewers to do each city. I might not get to all of them, but I’ll get to some of them, and it’s just totally great.”

Churgin loves jewelry, but loves a great find, especially when it’s all about family. You can tell when you speak with her that’s the core of it. “That piece of jewelry from your grandmother may not be worth a million dollars, but it’s your family story. It connects you to yourself, to your heritage, and you can pass it down. I really feel that jewelry is important.”

She and her husband were wed and moved to a brownstone in Brooklyn and, while working 100 hours a week at the restaurant and caring for a newborn

son, Churgin got into Victorian décor, visiting estate sales, buying antiques, and selling those same items to antique dealers. “I was a picker,” she says of her early days in antiquing. “When I was in New York running the restaurant, I would stop at the thrift shops, of course, because I have an eye for things and an eye for jewelry, and I did buy a couple of really good things in New York and brought them to Phillips Auction. That paid for some stuff in the brownstone.”

After moving to the Garden State, she continued to do the same, and slowly grew her business. In the early 2000s, she was introduced to David Rago, founder of Lambertville’s Rago Arts and Auction Center, who was starting a jewelry auction. Churgin ran it, and in 2002 it was very successful, but was less so the following year.

Rago wasn’t deterred and ensured Churgin wouldn’t be as well. “You can either let yourself give it up now, or you can learn from this and move forward,’” Churgin says, recalling Rago’s advice. “David’s a marvelous person,” she says. “He was my mentor in the auction world.”

“I’ve had some surprises,” Churgin says, whose biggest came in 2014, when she learned that a Camden County family found a Putilov Pearl Brooch under their mom’s bed. The 19th century brooch, traced back to Russian aristocracy, was sold at the Rago Arts and Auction Center Jewelry auction (which Churgin ran until 2016) for $813,750. “Those pieces that people don’t know what the thing is,” she says, “you can bring it forward, you can connect the current family situation to the family that existed in the 19th century. It’s really fabulous stuff.”

“

Photo courtesy of Sarah Churgin

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Troop 249 Beautifies Trail

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roop 249 adopted White Trail to maintain for two years. Saturday, September 11, 2021, they cleaned trail from liter and ensure clean from

clippings and encroached bushes as well as provide report to town of fallen trees and trail markers.

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Former Long Valley Resident Elected into NJ Lacrosse Hall of Fame

By Gary Simeone red McFarlin’s name will forever be cemented into the history of Long Valley. The eighty-nine-year-old former resident, was recently elected into the New Jersey Lacrosse Hall of Fame for his outstanding achievements in the sport. His son, Kevin McFarlin drove from his home in Georgia this summer to New Jersey to pick up the award on his father’s behalf.

“Our family lived in Long Valley when I was younger in the 1970’s, and my father was very instrumental in the lacrosse scene at the time,” said Kevin. “At the time there was really no kind of lacrosse program in western Morris County. There were no public high school or youth programs and my dad ended up changing all of that.”

McFarlin said that in 1974, his dad put together the Long Valley youth lacrosse program, and in 1975 he started the West Morris Central High School boy’s lacrosse club in Chester.

“He teamed up with Dave Pooley, who was the first head coach of the sport at Fairlawn High School in the 1960’s, and together they helped form a girls’ team, turn West Morris into state champs and a whole lot more.”

You could say that Fred McFarlin has been involved with the sport of lacrosse all of his life. He grew up in upstate New York in the Rochester area, which has an established lacrosse scene. He attended a prep school in Baltimore, Maryland, where he played lacrosse and attended Cornell University, where he played club ball. After graduating college, he went on to the United Sates Navy, where he

spent twenty years of his life as an ROTC officer.

McFarlin said that when his dad went on reserve from the Navy, he moved his family to a small community in Long Island called Lynbrook.

“We lived in Lynbrook and nearby Rockville Centre, when I was little, from about 1965 to 1973,” said McFarlin. “My dad spent his time as a youth lacrosse coach there and he also coached football. In fact, one of the players who went through his program on Long Island was Quint Kessenich, who is now a bigtime sports broadcaster on ABC and ESPN.”

The McFarlin family moved to the Long Valley area in 1973, and stayed in the area for over a decade before moving to Virginia and then onto North Carolina in the late 1980’s. They eventually moved to the state of Florida and now Kevin lives near his father in southeastern Camden County, Georgia.

“My father coached at the high school level and at college while in Virginia, started a youth program when we lived in North Carolina and coached for a few years continued on page 9

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59 Brookwood Rd Byram Township List price 350,000

Three bedroom, 1.1 bath home on private wooded lot. Remodeled kitchen with quartz counters and maple cabinets. Hardwood under carpets. Enclosed porch great to entertain. Brick surround gas fireplace in family room. Potential inlaw suite lower level. Oversized garage offers room for equipment. Roof 2012. Water heater 2018. See it today. Virtual tour available.

ST JU OLD S 5 Schindler Square, Washington Township List price 289,000

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catalyst who helped form the NYLA, which is now an integral part of USA Lacrosse.

I think that the letter was a contributing factor in his Hall of Fame ballot.”

Fred McFarlin was never about winning championships or trophies or all of the other accolades that come along with sports.

As Kevin says, “The fundamentals of the game and sportsmanship were the most important things to him. Raising young men and growing the game wherever he went, that was what really mattered to my dad.”

continued from page 8 in Florida, before he fully retired from the sport. Basically, everywhere he went he started a lacrosse program or youth league.

It was truly his life’s passion.”

McFarlin said that in the 1990’s, his father pitched an idea to the then president of the USA Lacrosse Foundation, to form a National Youth Lacrosse Association.

“The president loved the idea and gave my dad the leeway to go-ahead and form the new Association. He also wrote a letter on behalf of my father, that he was the

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Page 10 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

H

Holiday Extravaganza 2021

oliday Extravaganza 2021 will be held Saturday November 13th at Community Presbyterian Church, 220 Main St. Chester NJ. Hours are 10 am to 3 pm, free admission. The event will be held outdoors weather permitting. In case of inclement weather, the bazaar will be

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moved inside (masks required). Featured will be an array of baked goods, huge selection of holiday decor and gifts, 50/50 drawing, jewelry, frozen meals to go, hand knit clothing, and more. MC/V accepted.

908-879-5091 www.cpcchester.org

Did You Know?

he official beginning of spring is a highly anticipated day among people who can’t wait to put away their winter coats and soak up some warm sunlight.

But the day of the spring equinox is just as worthy of celebration for its uniqueness as it is for its symbolic connection with the end of winter. According to the Old Farmer’s Almanac, on the spring equinox, which is sometimes referred to as the “vernal equinox” or the “March equinox,” the sun crosses the celestial equator going south to north. Equinoxes (there’s another one in September each year) are the only two

times a year that the sun rises due east and sets due west for everyone on Earth. As the sun passes overhead on the equinox, the tilt of Earth is zero relative to the sun. That means that the planet’s axis neither points toward or away from the sun. Though it’s understandable why so many people appreciate the spring equinox, which ushers in increasing sunlight hours and later sunsets, the day’s uniqueness makes it even more worthy of celebration. This year the spring equinox happens on Saturday, March 20 at 5:37 a.m. EDT in the northern hemisphere.

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Long Valley Hosting Medicare Workshop

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nowledge is like a garden; if it is not cultivated, it cannot be harvested.” With that being said, Washington Township Recreation Dept., along with Lisa Pino, MIPPA Coordinator/ SHIP Counselor from Norwescap, Inc. is sponsoring a “FREE” Lunch and Seminar on “Medicare Series-Part B.” Please take this opportunity to be informed about the general updates, eligibility, and coverage regarding “Medicare –Part B.” The program takes place at Washington Twp. Senior Center, 35 East Springtown Road, Long Valley, on Wednesday,

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November 3, 2021 at 12:00 pm. You must be pre-registered to attend this workshop as limited space is available.

To register please go onto our website www.wtmorris.org and download the registration forms; Covid-19 Waiver, and a registration form. All forms are due before October 27, 2021 and may be submitted by email recreation@wtmorris. net, fax (908) 876-0029 or dropped off at 50 Rock Road, Long Valley.

If you should have any questions please do not hesitate to contact the Recreation Department at 908-876-5941.

Chester Lions Give Back

ncluded in the Chester Lions Clubs Code of Ethics is the edict “To aid my fellow men by giving my sympathy to those in distress, my aid to the weak and my substance to the needy.” We endeavor to follow these objectives by supporting organizations and/or individuals who need help.

At a recent meeting of the Club the following donations were designated: Jersey Battered Women Services (JBWS) A nonprofit agency providing safety, support and solutions for abused persons. JBWS mission is to prevent domestic violence through the protection and empowerment of the victim. The rehabilitation of family members, the advocacy of social reform to prevent partner violence, and the education of the public about domestic violence and its consequences. JBWS will receive $5,000.00 Crossroads4Hope, provides support to all people affected by cancer and their

loved ones, providing psychosocil support services to address the emotional and social impact of cancer. Crossroads4Hope will receive $3,500.00 Camp Marcella, NJ camp for the Blind Children, a residential summer camp ground designed specifically for children and teens with blindness, visual impairments and special needs. Camp Marcella will receive $5,000.00 Covenant House whose mission is to help each young person find safely and refuge from the dangers of living on the streets through compassion, unconditional love and absolute respect. Covenant House will receive up to $5,000.00 in conjunction with its Sleep out Program.

The Chester Lions Club is dedicated to helping those in need. For further information regarding the Chester Lions Club or Lionism please visit our web site at chesterlionsclubnj.com.

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Page 12 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

Mendham Man’s West to East Coast Bike Travels Birth Two Books

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By Steve Sears n 2018, Mendham’s Larry Walsh was undecided. After losing his job, he wanted to take a coast-to-coast bike ride, but at the same time sensed the responsibility of seeking another job.

He sought advice from the wisest advisors he knew. “We were at the beach on July 4, 2018; me, my wife, Kelley, and my three kids - two older daughters (Tara and Jaclyn, and Tara’s girlfriend Kelsey) and a son (Brian) – and I asked them, ‘What do you think? ‘And they said, ‘Dad, YOLO.’ I was like, ‘What? What is that?’ And they said, ‘YOLO. You know, it’s like, you only live once.’”

Walsh laughs at the recall, but it hammered home the message. “From there, I was in a zone.”

Decision made, Walsh then pedaled 7,300 miles through 17 states and 528 towns across the United States in two separate trips, chronicling the treks in his current book, Suit to Saddle: Cycling to Self-Discovery on the Southern Tier, and in a forthcoming offering, Forty to Finish.

As a youngster, Walsh was always trying things that tested his physical abilities, and after losing his job as well as suffering a foot injury, it was a tough transition. “I lost my funk,” says Walsh. Seeking to regain some confidence, he bought a bike and travel gear and prepared for his initial trip with a group called Adventure Cycling Association. “I talked to someone there and they said there was a tour coincidentally about two months later going through the

southern tier, which is exactly what I wanted, because I always just envisioned this.”

He prepared by bicycling through the hills of Mendham, and then headed to San Diego. “70 days later, we arrived in St. Augustine,” he says of the first trip. “A long, cross country bike ride is sort of the pinnacle of a long cycling career, and not the first step. But for me, it was the first step. And I had no idea how I was able to do this or whatever, but I did a decent job. I enjoyed the heck out of it.”

Walsh, who is also a United States Army veteran, was preparing to head back to work after the first ride. “Get it out of my system, if you will,” he says. However, his social media-posted photos and videos got a following, and he found he loved talking about his cycling adventure.

“People were just mesmerized, and I at that point realized, ‘You know what? I still have the cycling itch.’ So, I searched and searched and found a race, and it’s called the Transamerica (Trans Am) Bike Race.”

The second trip was 4,200 miles, from Oregon to Virginia. “Completely Suit to Saddle book continued on page 14 cover

Larry Walsh completes bike trip number one on the beach at Saint Augustine, Florida. Photos courtesy of Larry Walsh.

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Former Lawyer Embraces Farming and Creating Natural Herbal Teas

By Steve Sears nna Hackman, a lawyer by trade, has been a farmer for over 10 years, she starting initially with a raised bed of vegetables.

“This is it,” she says, entering the original garden area, explaining what each raised bed contains. “This is celery, and these are peppers. These are actually paprika peppers.” She walks over to another bed, abundant with turmeric, and then points to the right. “This is where the sweet potatoes were before I picked them,” she says, and then nodding to her left, continues. “And all that is oregano. It’s a great plant; this is like my third or fourth (plant) this year.”

Hackman reflects as a slight rain falls.

“My mom and I grew tomatoes when I was little in Ohio,” she says as she continues to stroll about her two-acre farm in Mendham, where she now grows heirloom tomatoes herself. “I thought that was cool,” she says while smiling.

Hackman grows other fruits and vegetables like apples and peaches (she has a very tiny orchard), blackberries, blueberries and raspberries, but especially a great variety of herbs. Hackman calls her farm The Naked Botanical, which reflects her desire to allow the colors and tastes of her freshly grown herbs to star alone in her created teas, minus added ingredients. “Get

naked, and be happy,” is her slogan.

Entering her third year of being a USDA Certified Organic farm, she has many raised beds full of herbs, and is always expanding.

Each spot she speaks about with enthusiasm.

She points out her lemon balm. “It’s one of the number one things I use in a lot of the product because it’s very calming,” says Hackman, then wandering towards a nearby tropical hibiscus plant. “A lot of people have no idea what the leaves taste like, because you buy the stuff in the store,” she says. “It’s also coming from India and China. Are they doing the same care we are?” Hackman believes in buying locally. “I’m a big local person. I always try locally, (then within) the United States, and then I try outside the country, but it always has to be certified organic.” She has been in her herb business for about five years. “I keep increasing my beds so I can grow more of my stuff.”

“This is lovage,” Hackman says as she continues her tour, “and lovage is a cross between parsley and celery. This plant can get at least four feet tall in the spring.” A Rutgers Master Gardener who volunteers her time helping others in the trade, Hackman sells her product online, at local farmers markets, and 20 different stores. “I make herbal salts with them,” she says of her use of lovage. “I’m always creating. It’s such fun for me.” She vacuum packs all her

Anna Hackman holding a variety of herbs from The Naked Botanical herb farm. Photo courtesy of Anna Hackman and The Naked Botanical.

product until use, to seal in the flavor. “I’m really conscious of the tastes. I want people to say, ‘I like the taste.’ It makes me happy.”

Lavender, anise, Jujube berries (Chinese dates), elderberry, fennel, peppermint, green apple mint (spearmint) and pineapple mint, alfalfa, marshmallow (“The root is the sticky part,” Hackman says) are all grown on The Naked Botanical farm, as well as beautiful plants like roses, asters, and goldenrods. “I move a lot of stuff; I try to figure out what makes them (the plants) happy.” Her plants

occasionally take on a life of their own, which is a joy for Hackman. “Sometimes they move themselves; they just pick themselves up with seeds and move someplace else. And I just laugh and say, ‘Why are you over here?’

Sometimes they’re always surprising me.”

Most of all, they make her think. “They make me stop and say, ‘There’s more to life.’

They’ve kind of figured it (life) out.”

For more information about The Naked Botanical, visit www.thenakedbotanical. com.

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Page 14 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

Travels Birth Two Books... continued from page 12 unsupported - every decision is the racer’s,” says Walsh, who saddled up again. “We had a satellite spot device that tracked us, and 73 of us from 16 countries left Astoria, Oregon on June 2, 2019, and I arrived at the Yorktown Victory Monument 38 days later. I averaged 109 miles a day.”

Walsh wrote a manuscript just to capture everything about both cycling trips. “When I’m six feet under, I figured future Walsh generations would be able to read about what their crazy uncle did or whatever,” he says with a chuckle. However, after submitting the manuscript to his publisher, a structural editor looked it over and had

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some further news. “They got back to me and said, ‘You have two stories, not one, and you should separate the stories into two books.’ I ended up rewriting the first and now I’m in the throes of writing the second. The first is a travelogue memoir, and the second one’s going to be a lot more about just the testosterone of a race.”

Published by Cabin Fever Press, Suit to Saddle: Cycling to Self-Discovery on the Southern Tier is available in eBook and paperback, and can be purchased on Amazon, Kobo, Barnes and Noble, iTunes, and Google Play. Forty to Finish will be released at a future date. For more information, visit www.larrywalsh.com.

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Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • October 2021 • Page 15

Beware of Skimmers and Shimmers

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ersonal safety refers to physical and mental well-being, but individuals also must take steps to safeguard their financial well-being.

Thieves have various ways to steal individuals’ personal data — everything from hacking into banking or shopping accounts to stealing physical mail. But thieves also have more sophisticated, often hidden ways to steal private financial data.

Consumer Reports says the public should be aware of skimmers and shimmers, which are sophisticated devices that steal data when people use public credit and debit card readers at ATMs, gas pumps and other locations.

A card skimmer is placed on top of the point-of-sale terminal. When a person swipes his or her credit or debit card, the device collects data from it. That data can be used to make fraudulent purchases and to produce counterfeit cards. Among the newest tools scammers use are shimmers, which are tiny types of skimmers that are capable of reading data from new chipbased cards, according to the ATM Industry Association, a nonprofit trade organization.

Criminals can even retrofit hidden cameras at ATMs and other locations with card skimmers. Skimmers and shimmers are often Bluetooth-based circuit boards that

can transmit stolen card data wirelessly. A thief can drive by a terminal to download card data remotely from a mobile device or laptop.

Devices are getting harder and harder to spot and are turning up in some unlikely places. According to Matt Hayes, a special agent for the United States Secret Service, “You’re never going to know the skimmer is installed on the point-of-sale terminal [of a store].” Recent surveillance video from inside an Aldi grocery store in Pennsylvania showed someone installing a skimming device right in front of a clerk who was unaware of what was happening.

The ATM Industry Association says about half of the skimmers currently in use are relatively invisible. The credit scoring company FICO indicates the latest data showed there was a 70 percent increase in the number of debit cards that were compromised in 2016 at ATMs and other card readers used by merchants, and the numbers continue to grow.

Monitoring credit card and banking statements as well as credit reports is the best way to keep on top of scams. Quickly report any unauthorized withdrawals, payments or purchases; otherwise, you may be responsible for charges and face longterm financial repercussions.

Page 16 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

The Road to Recovery Continues After Cancer Treatment Ends

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he American Cancer Society reports that the five-year survival rate for all cancers combined that were diagnosed between 2009 and 2015 was 67 percent. That’s a noteworthy and encouraging statistic, though global figures compiled by Ourworldindata.org indicate that five-year survival rates following diagnosis are significantly lower in poorer countries. In addition, the road to recovery for cancer patients typically does not end when treatments are completed.

The National Cancer Institute notes that many cancer survivors have indicated that information and support was abundant during their treatment. However, once treatment stopped, a new wave of questions and uncertainty soon emerged.

For example, the NCI points out that many cancer survivors recognize that life after treatment is less about “getting back to normal” than it is about discovering the new normal. In fact, the Memorial Sloan Ketting Cancer Center reports that most people indicate it takes between six and 12 months after they complete chemotherapy before they truly feel like themselves again.

Follow-up care also is a vital part of recovering from cancer. The NCI notes that

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cancer survivors typically return to the doctor every three to four months during the first two to three years after treatment.

After that, survivors may see their doctors once or twice a year. Follow-up care is vital for cancer survivors, as it provides their doctors an opportunity to determine if patients are experiencing any side effects from treatment. These appointments also allow doctors to determine if the cancer has returned or spread to other parts of the body. In addition, follow-up visits provide an opportunity for cancer survivors to bring up any symptoms or questions they might have. Patients can ask about ways to reduce their risk of cancer recurrence and seek advice on getting back to normal, including how quickly they can begin exercising and how to approach new fitness regimens if they were inactive prior to diagnosis.

The road to recovery from cancer may be filled with uncertainty. But cancer survivors should recognize that millions before them have survived the disease and gone on to live full, happy lives. A patient approach to recovery can help cancer survivors overcome any obstacles they may encounter along the way.

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Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • October 2021 • Page 17

I Remember Dad: The Beloved Scoutmaster

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By Richard Mabey Jr. erving as a Scoutmaster of Boy Scout Troop 170, was one of my beloved father’s cherished ministry. Dad firmly believed in the saying, “it is better to teach a boy morals, than to rehabilitate a wayward man.” My dad unselfishly served as Scoutmaster for 28 years.

Ten thousand memories, of Dad’s years as Scoutmaster, haunt the fibers of the weave and tapestry of the chambers of my heart. Dad had this old coffee can, that he kept hidden on a shelf of his basement workbench. Dad would put his spare change in that old coffee can, every Saturday morning, after breakfast. He would cash in the coffee can of change, once a year to pay for one or two scouts to attend summer camp.

Dad called it the Campership. If a scout’s family was having a tough time, Dad would tell them about the Campership.

All these years later, I can tell you that the Council Campership really didn’t exist.

Dad’s accumulated spare change was the financial source of the Campership.

The only ranks that Dad ever gave to scouts was that of Tenderfoot and Eagle Scout. Mr. Jack Floyd, Troop 170’s Assistant

Scoutmaster, pinned the Eagle Scout medal on my scout uniform, because Dad wanted to stand beside me as my father and not my Scoutmaster. But I remember how Dad used to say to a new Tenderfoot scout, “in a few years, I hope I’ll be presenting you with the Eagle Scout award.

When I look back at it all, I amazed at how many young lives my dad touched.

Dad loved scouting. He believed in the Scout Law and the Scout Oath. He took every word of those sacred promises of scouting, very seriously. I never once heard my dad say a bad word. I remember sitting in church one Sunday morning and the minister made a comment, disparagingly of truck drivers. The minister said, “oh, that fella swore like a truck driver.” I remember looking over to my father and seeing the hurt look on his face.

My father never took a chemistry class in his life. Yet, he taught hundreds of boys a most basic chemistry lesson, that we breathe in oxygen and exhale carbon dioxide oxide, and a tree absorbs carbon dioxide and releases oxygen. Dad used this lesson for a two-fold purpose. First, to show evidence of a Supreme Being and secondly to teach the scouts to respect

nature.

My father taught hundreds of scouts how to tie knots, tie lashings, how to use a map and compass, to apply basic first-aid skills, and to deeply respect all of nature.

He taught the scouts to respect one another. To be good citizens. To find their God given talents. To be leaders.

One of the most cherished memories of my father’s service as Scoutmaster, are centered upon the religious services that he and Mr. Donald Talbot, Assistant Scoutmaster, would lead on Sunday morning campouts. They would show the boys examples in nature, that showed the evidence of a Supreme Being. Boys of all faiths, would sit on fallen trees, boulders, and the hard earthen floor, and listen to the gentle and kind words of these two fine scout leaders.

My father received many awards in scouting, including the coveted Silver Beaver, the highest award a volunteer scout leader can receive. But Dad’s most cherished award was a slice of a maple log, wherein the boys used a woodburning tool to carve in Dad’s name and title him “The Beloved Scoutmaster.”

Richard Mabey Jr. is a freelance writer.

My beloved father in his scout uniform, from 1974.

He can be reached at richardmabeyjr@ hotmail.com. Please put on the subject line: My Life Publications.

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Page 18 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

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By Richard Mabey Jr. one of us have a written guarantee of tomorrow. When the sun sets tonight, it will be the last sunset for many, many people who share this planet with us.

None of us know when the time will come when our Divine Soul will depart our body. It is the very serious responsibility of each and every one of us to find the diamond of truth, that is sometimes hidden within the lump of coal.

I am not a theologian by trade. For the most part, I have earned my weekly paychecks in the arena of being a wordsmith, a writer, at times a proofreader and editor. I find myself torn at times, between maintaining a certain sensitivity toward all paths to the Divine One and sharing the golden truth granted unto me by all so many good people. This is a true-life story of one of the last endearing opportunities that my beloved mother had to share the love of Christ with the children living in the neighborhood of my church.

At my church of Grace Baptist Church, it is a tradition to hold the infamous “Trunk or Treat” event for both, the children of my church and the children of the neighborhood.

This Halloween event is usually held on Halloween night or the night before Halloween. It is generally well attended by both parents and children. It is such a fun evening. The children come dressed as

The Last Halloween

their favorite super-hero, a monster of some kind, an astronaut, or some other television character.

There are usually a good two dozen cars parked in the big parking lot, parked so that the car trunks are facing the path that the costumed children and parents walk to collect their goodies. Each open car trunk is decorated with a unique theme. It is such a fun time and everyone has such a wonderful time.

At the time of the Trunk or Treat event of 2019, Mom had been enduring severe chest pains from her damaged Aortic Valve.

Mom was scheduled for heart surgery in early November. My sister, Patti, and I were concerned that the Trunk or Treat event might have been too much of a strain on our dear mom. But Mom insisting on going to the Trunk or Treat event.

I was amazed by Mom’s devotion to the children who came to our Trunk or Treat car site. Sitting in her wheelchair, Mom had a basket of little candy bars on her lap. Mom chose not to simply throw the little candy bar into the child’s Halloween bag, but rather hand a candy bar to each child. As Mom would hand the little candy bar to a child, she would simply smile and say to the child, in a loving voice, “Jesus loves you.” Mom would hold the child’s hand for a moment or two as she shared these three words with

the little boy or girl.

It is important to note that the “Trunk or Treat” event was clearly marketed and advertised as a Christian event, sponsored by a Christian church. So, there was no problem of Mom’s words being in conflict with a family’s belief system. It was made clear as the crack in the Liberty Bell, that Grace Baptist Church was sponsoring a Christian event. Parents were clearly told this when they registered a child for the Trunk or Treat event.

For a few hours, that night, Mom forgot about her intense pain. It would be the last time that my dear, sweet mother would have the chance to share such an endearing moment with all so many children. I know it meant a lot to my beloved mother.

Mom did have her heart surgery in November. Sadly, she had a stroke in the latter part of the middle of December. My heart broke when my mom went Home to be with the Lord, just two days before Christmas Day of 2019.

In the last days of her life, before Mom had her stroke, she would often talk about the wonderful time she had at the Trunk or Treat event. In looking back, I am very grateful to my beloved Minister, Pastor Rocky Culpepper, for spearheading the wonderful Trunk or Treat event.

None of us have any guarantee that we

A photo of my mom, Janet Mabey, just a few months before her last Halloween.

will be here, in this physical body on this earth, when tomorrow comes. Each and every one of us have to find the golden truth of the existence of a Divine One. I have read the Holy Bible, cover to cover, several times.

However, I am far from being an academician of the Bible. But I do know for sure, each and every one of us needs to sincerely seek the golden truth of the existence of a loving Divine Being. For truly, tomorrow knows no guarantee.

Richard Mabey Jr. is a freelance writer. He can be reached at richardmabeyjr@hotmail. com. Please put on the subject line: My Life Publications.

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Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • October 2021 • Page 19

Page 20 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

From Standout Student to Busy Teen Existence, Mo-Beard’s Vikki Amourgianos Tackles Pageantry Life

I

By Jerry Del Priore t is fair to say that Morristown-Beard High School senior Vasiliki “Vikki” Amourgianos is a very unlikely pageant contestant.

But the 17-year-old Morris Plains resident competed in the 2021 Miss New Jersey Teen USA pageant in August as a way to test herself.

While she grew to relish the experience, she said she never envisioned going against girls around her age in such a competitive, anxiety-inducing atmosphere.

“I’m not the type of person to put myself in the spotlight,” said Amourgianos, who plays varsity volleyball for the Crimson. “I’m not the type of person to put myself in a dress and flaunt myself. But I wanted to challenge myself, so I went through the interview process. I made it through, and it molded me for the better.”

“It was definitely nerve-wracking to put myself out there,” she continued. “It caught me off guard that so many girls looked so professional. As soon as they announced the top 15, there were girls (who did not make the cut) bawling.”

But Amourgianos came through the competition with her head held high and a smile that lit up the stage.

However, she said the entire experience was not easy one bit.

Being in her first pageant, Amourgianos had to learn on the job--from how to wear her hair and makeup to finding just the perfect dress and the right amount of confidence

to balance her stage presence in order to confidently compete.

But once the Astoria, Queens-born, Greek-American started, she said she felt compelled to finish because several family members attended the pageant, and she poured a lot of money and time into the preparation.

“We put so much money into it, all my family was there, that I had to do it,” she recalled. “Just knowing they were there to support me, made it worth it.”

For all the diligent work that the affable, effervescent young lady put in, including raising $1875 for the event, she earned the honorable mention activewear award, eliciting a jovial reaction from her mom.

“It was unbelievable, to be honest,” Amourgianos said of capturing the recognition. “I didn’t expect it. My family jokingly says how unathletic I am. But when I won it, my mother let out this big scream.”

The pageant gave Amourgianos the platform to encourage girls to major in STEM disciplines and pursue careers in the fields. The numbers are overwhelmingly in favor of men at the moment, as 28 percent of women comprise the STEM workforce, according to BestColleges. com. Plus, per a 2018 U.S. census data report, women in STEM make 19 percent less than their male counterparts, on average.

“Twenty nine percent of women make up STEM in professional careers,” she closely estimated. “And only continued on page 21

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Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • October 2021 • Page 21

R CALL FO R U YO L VIRTUA G! N I T E ME

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Pageantry Life... continued from page 20 three percent of women are CEOs. I wanted to bring that to the table, to tell girls that they don’t have to abide by stereotypes. I also want to be a positive role model to my younger sister, Evva.”

As for Amourgianos, a high academic student, she said she plans on studying neuroscience in college and earn a Ph.D, deeply diving into brain function, children’s cancer research, and other areas.

Moreover, children’s cancer is a cause Amourgianos cares about dearly, as she has helped raise monies for St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital through the Teen Warriors nonprofit organization, which approximately 25 teens around Essex and Morris counties help operate. She said they helped raise around $50,000 through their Northern NJ walk.

Amourgianos plans on competing in the Miss Greek Orthodox Youth of America (GOYA) pageant in October through her church. But she said this competition is more faith-based, and very important because of that.

Nevertheless, Amourgianous said she works hard in all aspects of her existence: school, church, charity work, and family life, with her parents and Evva being her biggest

fans.

Her dad, James, suffered a debilitating back injury over 13 years ago, when he fell off a moving flatbed truck while working.

The accident left him paralyzed. He had to endure an eight-year period of surgeries and recovery, and relearned how to walk.

But Amourgianous said he still lives with chronic pain, although he is doing much better these days.

Seeing what her dad goes through has helped Amourgianous become a caring and empathetic person. And it is helping to shape her whole being and future choices.

“Now, to see my dad so upset and in pain, it has helped me have compassion and patience for people,” said the 5-foot-1 Morris Plains resident hell-bent on making a positive difference in the world. “My parents are extremely proud of me. It’s really exciting to go through this (picking a college, pageants) with them. I want to make them happy.”

As long as she continues on her positive path, Amourgianous believes in a fruitful future for herself.

“I think I have a big future around me,” she said. “and I’ll leave a great legacy for my family and everyone around me.”

Page 22 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

D

Quick, Nutritious Dishes to Enjoy Dairy Without the Discomfort

innertime dishes loaded with nutrients help keep loved ones connected while refueling after busy days spent at work and school. Dairy foods – key ingredients in many at-home meals – provide nutrients for people of all ages to grow and maintain stronger bodies and minds.

However, some bodies are unable to break down the sugar found in milk, known as lactose, which causes an upset stomach and a heavy, bloated feeling.

Rather than avoiding dairy and missing out on beneficial nutrients, people with lactose intolerance can enjoy real dairy products that are naturally low in or don’t contain lactose without the stomachache with foods like: Lactose-free milk, which is real milk with the same 13 essential nutrients as regular milk Hard and aged cheeses, such as cheddar, colby, Monterey Jack, Parmesan and Swiss Yogurt with live and active cultures,

which help break down lactose, making it easier to digest These easy-to-make meals offer lactose intolerance-friendly options for families seeking to keep milk on the menu. Because they all require an hour or less in the kitchen, they provide quick solutions for those hectic schedules without sacrificing taste or nutrition.

Visit MilkMeansMore.org to find more delicious dishes that fit a lactose intolerant meal plan.

Chicken Cordon Bleu Kebabs Recipe courtesy of Rachel Gurk of “Rachel Cooks” on behalf of Milk Means More Prep time: 15 minutes Cook time: 10 minutes Servings: 3 Skewers: Nonstick cooking spray 2 chicken breasts (6 ounces each), cubed 1 ham steak (6 ounces), cubed 6 bamboo skewers (8 inches) 1 tablespoon Dijon mustard 1 teaspoon pure maple syrup

1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper 1/4 teaspoon paprika 1 teaspoon extra-virgin olive oil Sauce: 2 tablespoons butter 2 tablespoons flour

1 cup lactose-free 2% milk 1 teaspoon Dijon mustard 1 cup shredded Swiss cheese salt, to taste (optional) pepper, to taste (optional) continued on page 23

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Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • October 2021 • Page 23

Dairy Without the Discomfort...

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continued from page 22 To make skewers: Preheat broiler to 500 F. Line broiler pan with foil and spray with nonstick cooking spray.

Thread cubed chicken pieces and cubed ham pieces onto skewers.

In small bowl, combine Dijon mustard, maple syrup, black pepper, paprika and oil.

Brush mustard mixture on skewers.

Broil about 5 minutes, flip and cook 5 minutes, or until chicken is cooked through.

To make sauce: In small saucepan over medium heat, melt butter. Whisk in flour and cook 1 minute, whisking constantly.

Gradually add milk, whisking constantly.

Add Dijon mustard. Continue cooking 5 minutes, or until thick. Reduce heat to low and stir in cheese, whisking until melted.

Add salt and pepper, to taste, if desired.

Serve chicken and ham kebabs with sauce.

Chicken, Spinach and Feta Casserole Recipe courtesy of Marcia Stanley, MS, RDN, on behalf of Milk Means More Prep time: 15 minutes

Cook time: 45 minutes Servings: 4 1 package (10 ounces) frozen chopped spinach, thawed 3 eggs, slightly beaten 2 cups cottage cheese 1 1/2 cups chopped cooked chicken 3/4 cup crumbled feta cheese 3 tablespoons all-purpose flour 2 tablespoons butter, melted 2 teaspoons dried minced onion 1 teaspoon dried oregano leaves 1/4 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon pepper Preheat oven to 350 F. Place spinach in colander. Use back of large spoon or rubber spatula to press moisture from spinach.

In large bowl, combine spinach, eggs, cottage cheese, chicken, feta cheese, flour, butter, onion, oregano, salt and pepper.

Spoon into greased 1 1/2-quart casserole dish. Bake, uncovered, 45-50 minutes, or until set near center (160 F).

Let stand 5 minutes before serving. (Family Features)

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Page 24 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

Go Plant Based for Healthy School Days

F

illing the kitchen with plant-based ingredients is an easy way to nudge kids toward nutritious after-school snacks and make busy weeknight dinners as healthy as they are delicious.

When you consume foods that boost your energy and give your body the fuel it needs, you can expect to feel healthier, both physically and emotionally. In many cases the foods that deliver are plant-based, and you can create delicious and healthy meals while adhering to a plant-based eating plan.

Make Easy Substitutes Having a vegetarian meal once a day is a great start, or even try “meatless Mondays” at home. Swap out ice cream and instead go for frozen blended bananas as an afterdinner treat. Try a nut- or grain-based milk in place of your normal dairy.

Make Gradual Changes Drastically changing your eating habits can be challenging. Small, sustainable changes are easier to manage and simpler to implement. Even one change per day can lead to healthier eating, like swapping the meat in a normal sandwich for a plant-

based protein, such as a salad made with chickpeas or lentils, for a quick and easy lunch.

Start Meal Planning Meal planning can reduce the time you spend in the kitchen and cut the cost of your groceries while making plant-based eating easy. When you plan meals in advance, you can buy in bulk and do the prep work ahead of time, which means you can whip up tasty plant-based meals in minutes. Keep healthy staples on hand like vegan, cholesterol-free and trans fat-free Toufayan multi-grain pita bread. The pre-split pita is perfect to keep on hand and fill with your favorite plantbased ingredients for a quick meal or pair with hummus, chickpea salad or apples.

Made with quality, wholesome ingredients, each bread is hearth-baked to a golden brown for a tasty, convenient and versatile complement to a wide range of plant-based foods. They’re easy to find in your local grocer’s deli section.

Get inspired to create family-friendly, plant-based dishes with these recipes and more at Toufayan.com.

Apple Pie Stuffed Pitas Prep time: 10 minutes Cook time: 17 minutes Servings: 4 Filling: 4 green apples, peeled, cored and thinly sliced 1 teaspoon cinnamon 1/2 teaspoon nutmeg 2 tablespoons plant-based butter 1/3 cup white sugar 3 tablespoons water 1 easpoon cornstarch Oat Crumble Topping: 1/2 cup flour 1/2 cup rolled oats 1/4 cup brown sugar 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon 1 tablespoon orange juice 1 pinch salt 2 tablespoons plant-based butter 4 Toufayan Multi-Grain Pita Bread Preheat oven to 350 F. To make filling: In large saute pan over medium heat add apples, cinnamon, nutmeg, butter, white sugar, water and

cornstarch. Cook apples down about 10 minutes until they begin to get gooey.

To make oat crumble topping: In medium bowl, mix flour, oats, brown sugar, cinnamon, orange juice and salt. Cut in butter and mix until crumbs begin to form.

Cut pitas in half and line baking sheet.

Fill one pita half with apple filling and lay on its side, being careful to not let apples fall out. Top with oat crumble. Repeat with remaining pitas.

Bake about 6 minutes. If desired, broil 1 minute for additional color.

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Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • October 2021 • Page 25

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Page 26 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

NJStarz NJ Starz: Martino Cartier Hometown: Sewell, NJ

N

By Steve Sears one of it was easy for Martino Cartier.

Nor is it still, but when asked to pick a word or phrase that aptly describes him, Cartier says, “A Jewish word, ‘bashert,’ which in Yiddish means, ‘It’s meant to be.” He then pauses, then says, “There’s two things I remember when I’m up against a challenge. These days, I still lose my temper, I still panic, and then I pray. I’ve come to the realization that when you’re on the cliff, he’s either going to keep you from falling or, when you fall, he’s going to give you wings. So that’s really pretty much what it comes down to.”

Cartier has a formidable wingspan, and amid all the pain in the early part of his 46 years, all the challenges that he battled with, a higher power kept him aloft.

Cartier, who owns Martino Cartier Salon in Sewell (Washington Township), New Jersey, is also the founder of Wigs & Wishes, a wonderful annual event that provides women who lose their hair during cancer battles with a wig at no cost, and also grants wishes to children suffering with childhood cancers.

The next Wigs & Wishes event will be held on October 23, 2021 at Rivers Casino in Philadelphia. “It’s going to be quite a spectacular event, because we kind of got robbed of our 10th anniversary last year, so this year we’re doing it big,” says Cartier. “We’re going to have an 18-minute firework show right on the Delaware (River), right in front of the event center, and the Coast Guard is going to block off the Delaware and they’re bringing in a barge - it’s going to be pretty cool.” Popular singer Paula Abdul, whose support Cartier has wholeheartedly, will attend. “She comes every year,” says Cartier, who was born, adopted, and lived in the Garden State prior to his family moving to the Florida Keys when he was five.

There’s a special adoption story here as well. When little, Cartier’s adoptive mom, Joann Maguire, would always call him “Marty Special.” “She instilled in me that I was special because they chose me and they got to pick me,” says Cartier fondly. “Being just as tenacious then as I am now, I said to her at that young age, ‘What if my birth mother is looking for me?’ And she said, ‘Well, one day when you grow up, I’ll help you find her.’”

The fortunes of he and his family turned when he was age 6 and they lost everything, and his adoptive father became mentally, physically, and verbally abusive. In 1986, the movie American Tale was released, it about a tiny mouse who loses his family and tries to find them. James Ingram’s “Somewhere Out There” served as the movie’s theme.

“At that time in my life,” explains Cartier, “I suffered from depression at the age of 11. My mother felt so bad, and she said, ‘I promise you when you turn 18, I will help you find your birth mother.’ Because at that time, being young and confused, and feeling unwanted and not worthy, I thought that if I found my birth family that I would be complete. At that time, being adopted was what defined me.” While in Florida in elementary school he got bullied, and when his

family moved back to New Jersey and Williamstown when he was 13, he was targeted again.

Seeking safer pastures for their son, during his freshman year in high school the Maguires moved to Glassboro. The move was significant, with leadership at the school and the school system ensuring his well being, and encouraging him to attend a local vocational school for half the day. His VicePrincipal suggested he study cosmetology, Cartier being the only male of 34 students. “I went,” he recalls, “and I realized that it was all about being creative, and about making people feel good, so I started learning quickly as these senior citizens would come in and get curls and rollers. You made them feel so good and, in return, you felt good. That’s when things started to kind of change a little bit.”

At age 18, the same Vice-Principal and his guidance counselor promised to take Cartier to get his birth records, and the latter drove him to Journal Square in Jersey City to do just that. “We walk in, and the same man who signed my birth certificate was still there. I couldn’t believe it. And he gets out this old book - a big old book. We just gave him my name, date of birth, and my social security number, and he thumbs through the book, he sticks his finger down, and he says, ‘You didn’t tell me you were adopted? Those records are sealed,’ and he closed the book. It was just like a bomb went off because, again, my brain kept telling me, ‘When you find out where you came from, you will be complete and you’ll be able to move on with life.’”

“It was horrible,” he says, “and my relationship with my father was just getting more and more toxic.”

He had reached bottom – almost. Shortly thereafter, he drove his mother’s car into the woods, put a hose in the muffler, and attempted suicide. However, a park ranger found the car, broke the window, called 911, and Cartier woke up in the hospital, his mom crying over his bed. He was a survivor for the first time, but it wouldn’t be the last. He started working at salons, but none were suited to him, and he still couldn’t kick his depression. Finally, while working at a salon in Cherry Hill, he gave up again. “I remember one day, it was a Friday, and I just said, ‘I can’t do this,’ and I left, and Cherry Hill is near Camden, and I drove around Camden, until somebody came up to my window and said, ‘What are you looking for?’ I had just cashed my paycheck, it was $33, so I bought 33 dime bags of cocaine.” He drove north on the New Jersey Turnpike to New York state, opened every bag of cocaine, emptied the contents into a Tupperware dish, and, in his words, “did the entire thing. Three days later, I woke up in the hospital, bruises on my chest, burn marks - the whole nine - and the paramedic that brought me there came to check on me, and he said, ‘You’re lucky to be alive.’”

Realizing that he had a bigger purpose in life and that someone or something else was in control, Cartier opened his own tiny hair salon in Pitman in 1998. A woman one day entered his salon with her son, and he did her hair. Six months later, the woman returned, she telling Cartier her son was suffering with a rare form of brain cancer and had

a year to live. He asked how he could help, and the woman said she’d just like not to work, but spend all of her life with her terminally ill son.

Cartier’s wheels turned: he planned a cut-a-thon to help her. “The day came,” he recalls, “I did the cut-a-thon, and then a couple of other hairdressers in the area heard about it, and they came and helped a little bit. The goal was $5,000. It wound up going on for two days, and I remember the second day my hands hurt so bad, but we were getting close to $20,000.” The cut-a-thon raised over $22,000, and it paid for the woman’s mortgage for exactly 24 months, and her son lived another 24 months. “I mean, I’ve told this story 1,000 times,” he says, “and I still get chills when I share it.

But that was just another validation, like, ‘Okay, this is your purpose. Understand that I gave you a gift. You have to use this gift the right way. Quit saying, ‘Woe is me.’ What defines you is not your adoption; what defines you is what you do with your time, your talent and your treasure. This is a final warning.”

He let go of the notion to try and find his birth family, but the universe wouldn’t release its grip. It was 2005, he had a nice salon and great clientele, and he also one night had a dream. Cartier explains. “On June 5, 2005, I have a dream that I’m in Egypt. There was a woman in the dream that was not at all how I pictured her. I could smell where I was, I could continued on page 27

Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • October 2021 • Page 27

NJ Starz... continued from page 26 see it, I knew that this was my birth mother. So, I went up to her and I said, ‘Were you in America in 1975?’ And she said, ‘Who are you?’ I said, ‘Is your name Miriam?’ And she said, ‘Who are you?’ I said, ‘Baby boy Ayad.’ And she cried, she screamed, and she said, ‘I named you Ayad because it’s my last name. Put it together and you’ll find me!’”

Cartier woke up in a pool of sweat. He went to work, canceled all his clients that day, and called Trenton, and after giving his information, got a call back on a Friday at 5 p.m.

The woman on the other end asked him to go somewhere quiet. Cartier starts crying at the recollection of the rest of the conversation. “I thought she was calling to tell me that she had passed away,” he says of his birth mom, “but she was calling to tell me that, ‘Your mom has been looking for you since 1998.” He also learned that she was still alive, her name was Miriam Ayad, and she lived in Jersey City.

Cartier headed to Trenton, where a letter from his birth mom had previously sat in a sealed file. Cartier tried to read it. “The letter started, ‘My son…’ and I just couldn’t do it,” Cartier said, handing the letter back to the woman, who had read the letter from Miriam Ayad explaining everything a few times. It closed with the words, “I will wait for you…“ He drove to Jersey City with his mom, knocked on the door of his birth mom, and at 6’ 1”, was looking at nothing when the door opened. “And I looked down (at my birth mom), and I started to laugh and said, ‘There’s no way I came out of you.’ It just broke the ice.” Miriam Ayad had diphtheria as a baby, which stunted her growth. The fever that she developed as a toddler caused all her health problems, so she was very sick and almost died many times before Cartier

found her. “In fact, she was having heart surgery the next day, so they postponed it a few days in case something went wrong so we could spend time together.” Cartier’s mom took care of his birth mom for the last 16 years of her life, and they spent every holiday together. ‘My mother and her were inseparable.”

Cartier’s non-profit foundation, initially called FriendsAreByYourSide is now known as Wigs & Wishes. It is entering its second decade. Says Cartier (whose motto is, “You don’t know how to live if you don’t know how to give”), “We are a true nonprofit. We don’t have any paid employees, we are run by nearly 200 volunteers, and we never turn anyone away, and there’s zero red tape.”

Always thinking of others, Cartier has new projects as well, one a nifty petting zoo. Zoo Hoo is located on a farm on

his property in Sewell on Salina Road. “At the petting zoo,” says Cartier, “we can have a safe haven for kids that have lost their hair.” He’s also planning on having his own reality show on a network like Lifetime or A&E or Hallmark. “I want something that people can be inspired by, can see the lives that are being changed everyday across the country through our efforts.”

Cartier is also planning a book project.

Martino Cartier Salon is located at 304 Hurffville Crosskeys Road in Sewell. For more information about Wigs & Wishes, visit www.wigsandwishes.org.

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The Role of Staging When Diagnosing Breast Cancer

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cancer diagnosis can be overwhelming, and people who receive such news may be flooded with a wide range of emotions. When delivering such a diagnosis, doctors share vital information about their patients’ disease. Those details can go a long way toward easing patients’ concerns.

Staging is an important component of cancer treatment. The National Cancer Institute notes that stage refers to the extent of the cancer, including how large the tumor is and whether or not it has spread, or metastasized. Learning the stage of the cancer, which is typically expressed on a scale of 0 through IV, helps doctors understand how serious the cancer is and the patient’s chances of survival.

Staging also is used to plan treatments and potentially identify clinical trials that may serve as treatment options.

The American Joint Committee on Cancer oversees the breast cancer staging system and utilizes the TNM system. Breastcancer. org notes that three clinical characteristics, referred to as “T, N, and M,” are used to calculate the stage of the cancer: • the size of the tumor and whether or not is has grown into nearby tissue (T) • whether the cancer is in the lymph nodes (N) • whether the cancer has spread, or metastasized, into other parts of the body beyond the breast (M) Additional characteristics were added to the AJCC’s TNM breast cancer staging

system in 2018. Though this has made determining the stage of breast cancer more complex, Breastcancer.org notes that it’s also made staging more accurate. That improved accuracy increases the likelihood that doctors will choose the most effective treatment plan for their patients, which should ease those patients’ concerns as they begin treatment.

Staging is complex, and patients should know that staging alone does not dictate prognosis. The following breakdown, courtesy of the NCI, is a brief description of the five stages of cancer (stages O through IV). A more detailed description of breast cancer stages can be found at https://www. breastcancer.org/symptoms/diagnosis/ staging.

• Stage 0: This is diagnosed when abnormal cells are present but have not spread to nearby tissue. Stage 0 is also called carcinoma in situ, or CIS. CIS is not cancer, but it may become cancer.

• Stages I through III: Cancer is present in these stages. The higher the number, the larger the tumor is and the more it has spread into nearby tissues.

• Stage IV: The cancer has spread into distant parts of the body.

Staging plays an important role in treating cancer. Recognizing the role of staging can help patients better understand their disease and the direction of their treatments. More information about staging is available at www.cancer.gov.

Have a human interest story or something you would like to share?

Email us at editor@mylifepublications.com

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What to Know Before Installing Built-ins

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fter purchasing a new home, buyers often want to put their own fingerprint on the property.

Homeowners anticipate the day when their homes are transformed into spaces that reflect their style and not the preferences of previous owners.

When deciding how to renovate interior spaces, homeowners will make some relatively temporary changes, but they also may consider some permanent adjustments. Built-ins fall into the category of permanent adjustments, and while realty professionals note that built-ins tend to provide a good return on investment, homeowners can learn more about builtins before deciding if they want to install them in their homes.

What are built-ins?

Realtor.com defines built-ins as any feature that is built into the interior of a home. The term “built-ins” may immediately conjure up images of bookshelves, but built-ins also include benches and entertainment centers.

Why install built-ins?

Built-ins can be both utilitarian and aesthetically appealing. Built-ins are functional because they provide storage space that homeowners may otherwise find hard to create. Built-ins are embedded in walls that may otherwise be useful only to hang artwork. This can provide muchneeded storage space in homes with limited square footage. Professionally installed built-ins also can transform rooms, making them appear more organized. Customized built-ins also can give homes their own unique character, though it’s important to note that prospective buyers may or may not appreciate that uniqueness.

Are there disadvantages to built-ins?

The permanence of built-ins may not appeal to some buyers. If buyers don’t like built-ins at all or are not fond of the look of customized built-ins, that may be enough to convince them to walk away from a property. However, Realtor.com notes that functional built-ins, like built-in bench seats with storage capacity, appeal

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to modern buyers and their preference for as much storage space as possible.

Permanent built-ins also can be costly.

The home remodeling resource Fixr.com notes that built-in entertainment center installations can cost between $8,000 and $9,500. Built-in seating and bookshelves are not as costly, but such projects still cost more than simply buying premade furniture.

Some buyers also may see built-ins as

limiting what they can do with a space.

That can be a major disadvantage as more professionals work from home and seek multi-functional spaces in their homes.

Built-ins can dramatically change the look of a room and provide some muchneeded storage space. But it’s imperative that homeowners give ample thought to built-ins before deciding to install them in their homes.

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Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • October 2021 • Page 31

The 200 Club of Morris County Awards Committee Announces 50th Golden Celebration Plans

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By Janet R. Rapisardi he 200 Club of Morris County has listened to your concerns, and the Board has rescheduled our 50th Awards Event to better suit your requests!

The Awards Committee has recently met to plan a spectacular evening event to honor our 50 years in support of Morris County first responders from Fire, local Police, New Jersey State Police departments and Emergency Medical Technician services on Thursday, May 5th, 2022 on Route 23 in Pompton Plains at the grand Legacy Castle, President Jim Rizzo presiding. Valor and Meritorious awards will be presented to our heroic First Responders.

President Rizzo facilitated the first of many meetings by generously providing the hors d’oeuvres, appetizers, pizzas, and assorted platters at The Godfather of Morristown, while Cambridge Wines graciously donated beverages.

The 200 Club is a not-for-profit founded in 1971. Its Mission helps to provide financial support for spouses and dependents of Morris County heroes who have lost their lives in the line of duty while valiantly responding and protecting Morris County

citizenry. To date, the Club has disbursed over $5 million dollars for this worthy cause. Scholarships are also awarded to qualified dependents of our Morris County first responders on a merit basis and are anonymously assigned a number for the selection process.

Our first responder family has met the challenges of recent tougher times, more so than ever before, and their stakes are more real than ever. We’ve recently seen firefighters evacuate residents from homes and overturned cars due to unexpected flood waters, State and local police working in tandem to ensure our safety, and EMS working tirelessly overtime to swiftly address any medical necessity.

Join us in acknowledging these First Responders and their daily risks in knowing they may not make it back home. Your ticket purchase, sponsorship and donation will make a world of difference to the spouses and dependent children of Morris County’s finest! And your membership is a commitment to our family of like-minded members while supporting Morris County’s heroes! Be our 200MC+1 today!

50th Golden Celebration Co-chairs Janet

L to R: Awards Event Committee: Alan Florin, Chairman of the Board and Awards Co-Chair Bill Lockwood, Awards Co-Chair Janet Rapisardi, President Jim Rizzo, Sr. VP and Sponsorship Chair Rob D’Emidio, Chuck Aaron, John Corigliano, Awards Co-Chair Ron Barnett, Damien Paumi and John Mania.

Rapisardi, Ron Barnett and Chairman of the Board Bill Lockwood will be unveiling more details in the months to come. Hint: Our first responder services will also be involved in an active way! Stay posted! Contact Sponsorship Chair, Sr. VP Rob D’Emidio for impressive media advertising opportunities,

and contact our Awards Co-Chairs Janet Rapisardi, Ron Barnett and Chairman of the Board Bill Lockwood at 200clubofmorris@ concast.net or call: 973-630-7933 for questions or membership (mention LC200), today.

Page 32 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

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Teach Kids How to Protect the Earth

eaching kids about the environment from an early age starts lifelong habits and creates awareness about the way humans affect the Earth. Connecting those lessons to school is an easy way to reinforce how the whole family can make everyday changes that make a difference.

Lower lunchtime impact. Between brown bags, baggies and other packaging waste, school lunches generate a heap of trash.

Instead, encourage kids to pick colorful reusable lunchboxes they can use again and again. Bento-style boxes add kid-friendly fun while keeping food separated so you can skip plastic baggies. Another earth-friendly suggestion for school lunch: instead of singleserve products, buy larger bulk packages you can use to fill reusable containers.

Manage transportation. Getting kids to and from school affects the environment in multiple ways, from energy consumption to pollution. You can reduce your family’s impact by having kids ride the bus or carpooling with others in your neighborhood.

Avoid idling while at school pickup and drop off and advocate for your school district to use clean energy options, like propane, for its transportation fleet.

According to the Propane Education & Research Council, propane school buses

offer multiple benefits for school districts and students alike. Not only do propane buses save school districts’ money, but they also reduce harmful emissions, giving students a healthier ride to school.

Find more information at BetterOurBuses. com.

Stop water waste. Over the past year, access to water fountains has been significantly limited to prevent the spread of germs. That means many school districts are more receptive to having kids bring water bottles from home. Sending your little learners off with reusable bottles offers a win-win that reduces reliance on plastic bottles and other single-serve beverage containers, while also encouraging kids to practice healthy habits by staying hydrated throughout the day.

Skip the supply splurge. While there’s something exciting about breaking open a brand new box of crayons or markers, it’s not really necessary to buy all new supplies year after year. Reusing what gets sent home at the end of the year saves money and prevents waste of still-functional supplies that would otherwise take up space in landfills.

Encourage resourceful recycling. Get kids excited about recycling by designing

Source: Propane Education & Resource Council

and decorating recycling bins using leftover materials around the house. When it’s fun and they’ve had a hand in creating the tools, kids are more likely to remember to put recycling in its place.

Include the whole family. Family time can be a precious commodity while school is in session, so make it meaningful when you can by bringing everyone together for a cause.

Take the family to a local recycling center

for an afternoon of volunteering or gather everyone for a pick-up day at a nearby park.

School is often the center of kids’ worlds, so bringing lessons about protecting the environment into the education setting is a natural way to introduce them to ideas for protecting the Earth and its resources.

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continued from page 32 paying more attention to earth-friendly practices isn’t limited to just your home.

Switching to propane buses is one of the main ways school districts are updating their transportation plans to ensure every child has a safe, clean, healthy ride to school.

Energy Mix Electric vehicles make sense for several uses, including the passenger cars parents use to drive their students to school, but propane has a fuel range and performance better suited for school transportation vehicles that travel long distances at a time.

Energy Equity Generally, the more affordable energy is, the more equitable its distribution will be. The cost of a propane school bus and its refueling infrastructure is one of the most affordable options for school districts.

Propane buses are nearly four times less expensive than electric buses.

Plus, school districts save money throughout the lifetime of propane buses.

Propane school buses cost 30-50% less per mile to operate than diesel, according to the Propane Education & Research Council, and some districts are saving more than $1 per gallon, which can add up to thousands of dollars over a single school year. That’s

money that can go back into classrooms.

Carbon Footprint In most of the United States, propane school buses are a lower carbon option than electric school buses charged using the electric grid. New innovations in the industry have also led to a renewable propane option for school buses, which ensures low-carbon options well into the future. Because it’s produced from renewable raw materials, renewable propane is a lower carbon option than conventional propane and is cleaner than other energy sources.

Harmful Emissions While diesel exhaust is classified by the World Health Organization as a carcinogen, propane buses don’t expose students to the same harmful emissions. Propane school bus engines lower greenhouse gases and other harmful emissions to near-zero levels, which improves air quality and eliminates concerns about breathing-related issues.

In fact, propane school buses significantly reduce the harmful emissions that are federally regulated due to their negative impact on human health and are a known trigger for issues like asthma, bronchitis and other respiratory problems. (Family Features)

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Page 34 • October 2021 • Mendham, Morristown, Black River Life • Like us on facebook www.facebook.com/mypaperonline.com

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Top Tips to Stay Safe This Halloween Season

uch like Christmas, Halloween is no longer relegated to a single day. A number of Halloween enthusiasts now begin decorating at the start of October. Hijinks and autumn revelry fill the air as individuals eagerly count down to the end of the month.

Though the lightheartedness of Halloween festivities, such as costumes and candy, garner the bulk of celebrants’ attention, it’s important to take safety into consideration as well. According to the Mayo Clinic, children are twice as likely to be hit by a car on Halloween as other nights of the year. Cuts and burns also are more common on October 31.

A good Halloween scare should come from costumes, not accidents or injuries.

This Halloween, consider these safety measures, courtesy of Safe Kids Worldwide, the Mayo Clinic, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

• Make sure you’re visible when trickor-treating. Reflective tape, glow sticks, flashlights, or camping lanterns can make pedestrians more visible to motorists.

• Pedestrians should walk on sidewalks if

they are available. When sidewalks are not available, walk facing traffic and do so as far off to the side of the road as you can get.

• Drivers should be especially alert to pedestrians on Halloween. Drive slowly, as many kids scurry from house to house in search of Halloween candy.

• Pedestrians and drivers should follow the rules of the road, stopping at intersections and crossing in crosswalks.

• Consider alternatives to carving pumpkins, since the risk of being cut while carving is high. If you want to carve, leave the carving to adults. Utilize batteryoperated flameless candles or glow sticks to illuminate jack-o’-lanterns.

• All costumes, wigs and accessories should be fire-resistant. Make sure that costumes do not impede your ability to walk or see.

• Test makeup to check for skin irritation before application. Remove it promptly after returning home.

• Set up a buddy system so that no one is going it alone. Agree on a specific time children should return home. Adults should chaperone young children.

• While incidences of candy tampering

may be minimal, no one should snack on candy until it has been inspected.

Inspections also protect against food allergies.

• The candy bounty should be rationed

so no one overindulges and feels ill later on.

Halloween season is a fun time of year, but safety should go hand in hand with all the celebrating on this special day.

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