The Composer Album Booklet

F*ck being a role model. Often I’ve been placed on such a pedestal that I feel the figure at the top, doesn’t fully reflect the man behind it: the man that’s imperfect; the man with a sense of humour; the man that has bad days. I used to wish I had superpowers… sometimes tensed my body tight, wondering if I could move an object across the room or target strangers on public transport, to project telepathic messages to, then watched to see if and how their face changed. I’ve since learnt that superheroes are overrated; the real warriors and exemplars are the people in front of you, who guide and get you through your day - those who give their head and heart but ask for nothing in return. Weak become the heroes but what happens when heroes become weak or helpless; what happens when a hero needs saving?

I wrote Who Told You at a point in my life where I was just angry.

Vexed because I felt underestimated. Underappreciated, in more ways than one. I soon realised I had nobody to blame but myself, so cue, the rebirth. I knew I was talented but I have so much more to give, so much unlocked potential and the ability to completely shift a culture by both putting more of my life into my art, exploring my curiosities through it, and fusing with the experience of others’ to learn and grow. Who told you, we can’t win?

When the storm clears, you have no choice but to pick yourself up and re-build.

You must accept the cards you’ve been dealt before overcoming.

As a young man or woman, materially and emotionally deprived; you grow up to realise that the world is bigger than you think.

I was raised in Waltham Forest, East London. Some would say, a place riddled with crime. However, I find peace and love in the middle of it. On my grandparents’ balcony - where I learnt how to ride a bike and do kick-ups on both feet. I’d struggle to see over the walls, but I could damn well climb. My curiosity always got the better of me; an 8-year-old boy saw beyond the confines of the 4 corners.

Many that are raised in the hood don’t see many ways to look beyond the confines, or people that care enough to show them.

There’s so much talent here and it’s hard to watch it go to waste.

Boys and girls. Believe in the power of your talent and intelligence. So many among and before you have grown up pigeon-holed, abused and repressed. Remember every day that you are royalty.

Stick to the plan. Keep working.

I learned a lot about myself at University. Living away from home is overwhelming to say the least.. You’re thrown in the deep end of an endless pool and told to swim. No float, no lifeguards - too much pride to ask for help. I came to study but there’s temptation around every corner. The problem is, it’s usually the most detrimental things that are the most tempting. Eventually, it’s no longer just rebellion, it’s a bed that you make and you have to lay in.

You can be the most popular guy on Campus, but when it’s just you and your thoughts in that dorm room; it’s tough to stay balanced.

Now imagine what it must be like when your grades aren’t where you want them to be, you’re in debt, and you struggle to wake up on time for 9ams because you’re awake till sunrise chasing your own train of thought. The only time you feel free again is the few hours of alcohol and drug infused partying at the end of every week. According to the non-expert friends (who care but don’t understand) the best way to fight whatever you’re feeling is to ignore it and “get yourself up and out there”.

Bless them.

And so you do.. I guess you could say it works because these nights out are the only time you forget your inhibitions, your confidence isn’t a complete farce and you make an effort to be you again - albeit temporary. You sleep through Sunday, blinds closed and wake up Monday morning back to square one. You pack your bag, full of burdens and head to lectures or the library. Waiting for the end of the week to feel alive again.

By your second year, if it hasn’t broken you, it’s become routine. You’ve mastered how to be deflect conversations that get too personal and if anybody asks, you “couldn’t be better” ... What’s the motive this week?

As somebody that creates music, you have an untold power.

You can bring joy, evoke emotion and take people to places they may or may not have ever been before.

As you listen to these songs, I hope you smile; I hope you dance and the vibrations either take you to a point in your life when you didn’t have to worry about any bullshit, or help you to create fresh memories - happy ones.

WDYM was inspired by a song by Jay Z, titled Girls, Girls, Girls.

I asked myself what a modern day version of this might sound like. Whilst I speak very tongue-n-cheek on relations with various women from various backgrounds, with lyrics mostly focusing on wordplay, irony and stereotype.

‘WDYM’ which has been abbreviated from the words “what do you mean”, in context of the overall narrative of the album, comes at a point in my where I begin to discover and transition.

This is probably the first time you’ve ever heard me rap. One of the biggest things I’ve learned as an artist is being able to find the right way to deliver whatever it is I want to express. This means I NEED to be multi-layered; NEED to try new things.

Many of us have seen and heard the long-standing joke on social media, regarding young men using this exact phrase to wriggle out of remaining accountable to their partners when questioned. I’ll be the first to admit that the only reason I found the joke funny was because I could relate. I spent the latter part of my teenage years, running from accountability and commitment with women, and I’m still trying to work out why. I think it’s something to do with the way we’ve been conditioned, growing up. The environment we’ve been raised in doesn’t accommodate for expression or feelings. We’ve perpetuated this within our friendship groups, and have become young men who fail to recognise the value of women, or the consequences of our words and actions. Maybe we don’t value ourselves.

Maybe that’s why our rap lyrics are full of misogyny and arrogance. Maybe we don’t understand the real concept of value, so seek it in the wrong places.

Twilight/ that magical time of day that lies between daylight and darkness.

Couple things I should say to my mother for real.

But she won’t read the recipe till it’s making her mills so we sit in silence round the dinner table.

I just need some guidance.

Tell me I’m able.

Raised by the cain man, we ain’t built the same.

Might wear the same shoes, but I walk on my Js You’re blinded by lights, in the clubs with a spade I’m picking up the cards that my ancestors laid Diamond in the dirt: what the pressure made Engrave my name in your hearts not accolades.

July 1st, 2018 - I took the stage in front of 2,000 at the Royal Festival Hall to close TEDxLondon’s flagship event, with my very first TEDTalk. A Talk that epitomises this idea of growth; not only in its mere occurence but also in subject matter and content. I chose to just tell my story, the only way I know best.

Lifted from a single by Richard Maule titled, fire & Rage - Fire & Rage II is my TEDx Talk in song form. My journey so far.

Thank you to Richard Maule for having enough faith in me to give me his song and full creative license to create something new with it.

The growth continues‌

I’ve been writing and performing spoken word poetry for almost 5 years. This piece was written and recorded 3 years ago. It still stands as one of my favourite tracks; one that keeps me feeling grounded every time I hear or perform it.

It’s only right it made my album. Ojuelegba has also been used in The Composer’s Short Film - described by Complex as “A coming of age story, centered on the mental health and enlightenment journey of its protagonist, Emmanuel weaves rapped verses around haunting production with a standout feature from TE Dness on Part 1, and a tragic twist in the tale occurring on the sequel.

Emmanuel brought the circle to a close on “Ojuelegba” (Part 3). As the soothing Bekah Brown vocal opens out the track, lifted from the well-known Wizkid chorus, Emmanuel Speaks rhymes on his familial history, culture, and upbringing.”

I hope it reminds you of home.

For as far back as I can remember [into my childhood] I’ve always had a discord with Church and religion. I was the kid that dreaded waking up early on Sundays to get into my “best” clothes and have my hair thoroughly combed as I would be serving mass. I didn’t get it; I didn’t understand or enjoy it. It felt more like a chore than a voluntary act of faith. Growing up, I attended services at many different churches, from Catholic to Pentecostal and White Garment and still the disconnect remained. I always seemed to enjoy the Praise and Worship but overall Church felt like a place of judgement and fear, as opposed to faith, love and understanding.

I believe in a living God. One of loves me for who I am. One who does not by any stretch of the imagination, face the limitations of man. God is my friend before he is my Master. A younger me chose to run from the Master; the older me has chosen to speak to the friend. I am not by any means perfect. I sin and I make mistakes. He knows. Yet - he has given me a gift. The purpose of that gift? I’m yet to realise. Until then, I will put my faith in Him before man, in hopes to spread his power and make myself better. In every way possible.

It’s impossible to tell you every part of my story so far but I hope I’ve painted an accurate enough picture of the man behind the name.

Every experience is a learning curve and an opportunity to grow, and understand the man or woman that you are. The rain doesn’t last forever - unless you let it. As I write this, I’ve just received one of those “Unfortunately, on this occasion, you have not…” texts. I smiled it off and carried on planning. Next move. Bigger. Better.

I will fall, but I will also rise and rise stronger.

Trust me when I say you’ll be just fine...