NEXUS: WELCOME...HOME? 32
AQUARIUS JAN 20 - FEB 18
LEO JUL 23 - AUG 22
Jupiter rising brings about confronting emotional honesty, and in that spirit it is time you were honest with yourself. Next time the alarm rings to wake you for a 9am class say out loud “I wish I was back in lockdown”.
Some people are just too driven for parties, drinking, drugs, and sex. There is nothing wrong with being boring! On a related note we still have some vacancies at Orchard Park. Email Brett@...
PISCES FEB 19 - MAR 20
VIRGO AUG 23 - SEP 22
Mars is in retrograde and it is causing you an emotional Tsunami, either that or someone made a joke about Destiny Church near you because that also causes Tsunamis apparently.
Don’t be embarrassed by your own desires. We all have them. The young people reading this want fun and sex. To try new things and to reinvent. The mature students reading this want to know if this is Moodle and where they can buy a Pan-Optie.
ARIES MAR 21 - APR 19
LIBRA SEP 23 - OCT 22
Love is in the air this week, but first you have to love yourself. Not on an emotional level. This is a horoscope masturbation reference because you have no romantic prospects.
Every time you see that special someone from the party your heart starts to race, your pulse quickens, you break out in a cold sweat, and you lose your sense of smell. Um, that may not actually be lust. Dr. Ashley says get a test and remember to check in.
TAURUS APR 20 - MAY 20
SCORPIO OCT 23 - NOV 21
A famous greek writer once wrote that life is the search for unattainable perfection. Which sounds poignant till you realise the Greeks also believed lightning was an unhappy Zeus, and smashing plates was a sign of respect, so maybe make your own decisions on what life is.
People are always telling you to be impulsive, to take risks, and to try new things. They don’t understand you like we do. They will never appreciate the value of a perfectly organised Bongo Sushi Box.
GEMINI MAY 21 - JUN 20
SAGITTARIUS NOV 22 - DEC 21
Uranus and Pluto are competing for attention this week. Much like you shamelessly hoping the hottie in your lecturer will notice you. They won’t. So, be less forgettable?
Sometimes love means saying your sorry, so let us start. We’re sorry, that no one loves you.
CANCER JUN 21 - JUL 22
CAPRICORN DEC 22 - JAN 19
Much like the stars themselves people are constantly moving in and out of alignment. The person who seemed like a dream flatmate at last week’s bond signing is the same person leaving their toenails in a common space now. Who knows what next week will bring.
Allowing yourself to be vulnerable is the most human thing you will ever do. Actually scratch that, having a wank in the showers of College Hall is the most human thing you will ever do, but that makes you really vulnerable, so DOUBLE POINTS!
