N.08 / V.48
Clarence Street 7am – 10pm, 7 days a week. Phone (07) 839-4056
Just Juice Bubbles 1.25 Litre
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CONTENTS
CONTRIBUTORS
01.
EDITOR
EDITORIAL
Brittany Rose 02. LETTUCE
editor@nexusmag.co.nz
03.
UNI NEWS
DESIGN
04.
NEXUS NEWS
Olivia Paris
07. SPORTS
design@nexusmag.co.nz DEPUTY EDITOR Lyam Buchanan
08. CARE
lyam@nexusmag.co.nz
10. ENTERTAINMENT
MANAGING EDITOR James Raffan
12. REVIEWS
james@nexusmag.co.nz
14. ARTS
CONTRIBUTORS Tom Collopy
14. AUTEUR
Freddy Walker Jordan Smith
15. COVERED
Joshua Morris Georgia Pollock
16.
NZ SIGN LANGUAGE WEEK
18.
PRESCRIPTIVISM ON TRIAL
20.
LOST IN TRANSLATION
22.
YOUR SPACE
Jared Wooldridge Bronwyn Laundry Peter Dornauf Dr. Richard Swainson Matthew Rae Nina Fox Meggie Bolton Rangipare Ngaropo
26. COLUMNS COVER 29.
PAK 'N SAVE HEAD CHEF
30. SNAPPED
Olivia Paris ADVERTISING advertising@nexusmag.co.nz
31.
BLIND DATE OFFICES
32. PUZZLES
Ground Floor, Student Union Building Gate One, University of Waikato Knighton Road, Hamilton ONLINE facebook.com/nexusNZ @nexusmag Spotify: nexusmagazine ISSUE 8 9 MAY 2016 LANGUAGE
Editorial NEXUS MAGAZINE
EDITORIAL GOTTA LOVE THE D BRITTANY ROSE
Standing in line at the bank I messaged my friend, making plans to meet for coffee. There was a man in front of me wearing a navy polo tucked into charcoal straight leg trousers, and he had a thick accent. He was talking to the teller about accessing the money in his account, and it was taking quite a while. I didn't shift my weight from one impatient foot to the other, or sigh in annoyance — I waited patiently and smiled at the bank teller when she glanced at me. "I've already told you. You can access your account." Condescension dripped from between her tight lipped smile. He stumbled through another sentence, struggling to find the right words and ask for reassurance. "I just said that. You can access your account." She looked past him and threw me a huge, fake smile, "So sorry for the wait. How can I help you?" The well dressed man shuffled off to the ATM outside. Initially I'd thought the teller was just a rude bitch — maybe hungover, definitely ready to go on her 15 and get away from annoying customers. But after she spent the ten minutes sorting out my request with a pleasant air and chatting about all sorts it became pretty clear that she just wanted to get away from the person with the accent and minimal English proficiency. This isn't a new thing, but it's definitely a pretty racist thing — like when your grandparent gets snippy on the phone to IRD, and hangs up to have a rant about those people who don't even speak English. I volunteer as an in-home language tutor for a refugee couple, and they're incredibly social, friendly, talkative people — they just happen to have an English vocabulary roughly equivalent to that of their six year old. The last time I was there, they told me a story about trying to order KFC — Javier had confused the 'ch' blend in 'lunchbox' with the 'ck' sound in 'snackbox'. He'd tried to order a 'snatchbox', and I couldn't even giggle at the potential vagina euphemism. I can only hope the person working the counter treated them more kindly than the bank bitch treated the man with the accent. Language holds huge significance in our ability to communicate, and has the capacity to help us feel a sense of belonging. Using your own language is important to maintaining your well-being and growth as a person, and that's one of the reasons things like Māori Language Week, or Chinese TV on Freeview are so important. In our ethnically diverse country it is important that all people feel a sense of belonging — so maybe, if you speak to someone with limited English, be a bit patient. Or just don't treat them like they're an annoyance. Because language is such a significant part of our day-to-day lives we've dedicated a whole issue to it. It's New Zealand Sign Language Week so check out the interview with Deaf Aotearoa (p.16) to find out more about NZSL, consider ditching a prescriptivist approach to grammar (p.18) or laugh at how inane our language can be in the obligatory kiwi slang feature (p.20).
Britt 1
NEXUS MAGAZINE Lettuce
LTOETTHTE EUDICTOER
GREEDY FUCKERS FRIENDLY COMMUTER
Why the fuck do the APA get to reserve half a carpark every week? There's no way they get that many people to their lunchtime concerts. If they're going to reserve that many carparks for over half a day they should be paying for them. Let's stage a peaceful protest. Everyone wear orange conical party hats and sit in a carpark – Editor
Lettuce is the Letters to the Editor section of Nexus because If you say "letters" quick enough in a super Niu Zeelund accent it sounds like "lettuce". Clever, no? Probably not.
SCIENTIFIC QUERY LAZY BONES II
Comment on our Facebook page, on our Instagram, or even Snap your lettuce to us. Just use #lettuce and we'll put you in print, and respond to your comments. Either that or email lettuce@nexusmag.co.nz Disclaimer Letters published contain the opinion of the writer and the writer alone. Nexus publications take no responsibility for the content or opinions so
Dear science staff & students. Why haven't you invented teleportation yet? I'm over commuting. Also, I would like my hover board before Christmas. Seriously, what are you guys doing over there? Thx.
expressed. By submitting your letter you give consent to its publication in Nexus
Science is so useless if it's not around to aid me in my weight
and subsequent public scrutiny. Letters are the authors own work and Nexus will
gain symptomatic of never walking anywhere. Science, can you
not edit to compensate for lack of intelligence or coherency. Nexus reserves the
also create delicious food that doesn't go straight to my ass,
right to edit or refuse to publish any letter which breaches any law, is defamatory
plz? – Editor
to any person, or contains threats of violence or hate speech.
GET YOUR SHIT OFF MY LAWN.
POOS & WEES CLEAN QUEEN
NEIGHBOURHOOD WATCH Can we get real about how filthy the toilets in the Student Centre Dear students please note that if you don't use green bins or pack your
are? I'm not about telling people how to do their jobs, but pretty sure
rubbish they won't take it. Then it just stays on the lawn and makes our
cleaners are supposed to clean?
neighbourhood look like shit. If you can't do rubbish how do you expect grow up graduate and get a job? Either teach your self to be an adult or simply go back home to mom and dads and admit defeat.
You've got a lot of questions, but not many answers. What do you want from me? – Editor
Don't blame students, it's just 18 year olds in general who can't look after themselves – Editor
CAKE, PLZ SASSY PANTS
WHEELS ON THE BUS LAZY BONES
This is something I've kept close to my chest for some time but no longer, Vitamin D owes me a fucking carrot cake. I see you writing up recipes in your torture basement trying to forget your promises.
Is paid parking meant to encourage me to walk or use public transport? For
But you promised me and it's time you made good on them Vitamin
that to work the bus needs to be cheaper than parking, not $4.80 return…
Douchemeister. Start grating those carrots you sadist. I will have
Just “watch Panopto” with your “study partner” instead. Education is overrated anyway. – Editor
2
N.08 / V.48
what is owed me. But carrot cake sucks. – Editor
LANGUAGE
News from the University NEXUS MAGAZINE
Management student Braden Kempthorne (left) coached the Hamilton
ONYA
TOP COACH
Boys High School U15 rowing crew to a record-breaking victory at Maadi Cup last month. The crew won five golds in five finals at Lake Ruataniwha. REPPING IN NZ SEVENS The Waikato women's team came second at the national tertiary 7's champs recently. Afterwards Huia Harding, Cheyelle RobinsReti, Stephanie Hyde-Richards and Ilacy Tomu were selected to play at the world tournament in Wales.
BIG SCHOLARSHIP FOR SCIENCE GRAD PhD student Simon Stewart recently won the Bruce Cronin Bay Trust Scholarship worth $5000. He’s putting this towards his doctoral studies in biological sciences.
FUTSAL CHAMPS SQUAD GOALS
The Waikato men's team finished second
Six students are trialling for NZ’s Trans-Tasman rowing squad
at the national University Futsal Champs
after their performance at the NZ University Rowing Champs.
recently. Mahmood Alfarraji (pictured)
Elliot Rhodes, Thomas Bedford, Ashlea Quirk, Tarina Fordham,
won the Golden Boot Award for top goal
Tayla Sklenars, Tessa Jenkins helped the Waikato squad win two
scorer.
golds and place second overall. Full stories available at waikato.ac.nz/news-events. Got a story to share? Email meganb@waikato.ac.nz.
THE WAIKATO OE
GIVE AWAY YOUR OLD SPORTS GEAR
Check the A Semester exam timetable
Want to study, travel and make new
Following the destruction caused by
at timetable.waikato.ac.nz/exams/. If
overseas friends while completing
two cyclones in Fiji, we’re helping ship
you need to change your exam time or
your Waikato degree? Find out how at
a container full of sports gear to the
location, applications close Friday 20
the Student Exchange info session on
families on the islands. Donate your old
May. If you have a learning or physical
Wednesday 18 May, 1-2pm in M.1.42,
gear before 16 May to Level Zero Student
disability, please contact Disability
Student Centre. Register at bit.ly/
Centre, He Kohinga Oruoru Resource
Support Services by Friday 27 May. For
WaiOEinfo
Exchange space (the Cowshed), UniRec
other help, email exams@waikato.ac.nz or
gym reception and Innovation Station
call 07 838 4466 ext 8018.
(Hillcrest Road).
WE’RE HERE TO HELP
OPEN DAY
CV UP TO SCRATCH?
If you want to know the best way to
A reminder that our annual Open Day is
Create a CV and cover letter that makes
find academic articles, how to use Excel,
on Friday 13 May. Parking in Gate 2B will
your job application stand out. Visit
PowerPoint, APA referencing (and more),
be unavailable and there’ll be a lot more
waikato.ac.nz/go/careers for workshop
the Library runs free tutorials to help. Visit
people and noise on campus — sorry for
times and topics.
waikato.ac.nz/library/study/classes for
any inconveniences. Visit waikato.ac.nz/
more info.
events/openday for more info.
Go to iWaikato or Student eNews for more information and other need-to-knows.
NEED TO KNOW
EXAM TIMETABLE IS OUT
NEXUS MAGAZINE News
NEWS AN INTERVIEW WITH DAVID BENNETT BRITTANY ROSE
This year Nexus has been delivering political interview after political
What are some of the highlights of the Key led government in your eyes?
interview. So far we have covered Gareth Hughes, Materia Turei, James Shaw
The navigation of the global financial crisis over the last 5-8 years and the rebuild
and Andrew Little. It was pointed out that we might be a little too far to the
of Christchurch are the two high water marks. Locally, the large investment in
left, so we text our friend David Bennett and asked if he could help correct
infrastructure has also been significant. I also think the culture of unity within the
the perception that we are all leftie, hippie, pot smokers. Which doesn't
Party and a defined plan had been well received in the community.
mean some of us aren't some of those things sometimes. Of course DB, never one to miss a PR spot came to our rescue and talked about inland ports, a decade in Parliament and whether he was going to run for Mayor. So it’s a Nexus interview with David Bennett and we have to start it in the traditional way.... Why should anyone give a fuck about inland ports? An inland port generally attracts new jobs and opportunities for a city. With
What’s your opinion on Labour’s Free Education Plan? It is unworkable. Such a plan is so far in the future it won’t benefit current students. It has many details that aren’t finalised and no guaranteed funding source. It also is not properly costed and creates a number of inequalities in our system. I can’t see Labour actually being able to implement it ever if they promised it and so I can’t see it eventuating.
Hamilton uniquely placed to be a freight hub in NZ a whole set of new jobs could arise in the logistics area if a new inland port eventuated. This would provide more
Peter Dunne recently suggested the war on drugs may not be the answer,
jobs for graduating students and potentially part-time work for studying students.
what are your thoughts?
What does a typical day as MP Ham East look like?
I think that Peter Dunne has been opportunistic and trying to follow the Australian approach announced a matter of days before he announced his approach. I think
There are two types of days. First, those in the electorate that normally involves
at this stage the current prohibitions on cannabis will remain but the concept of
a mix of: constituent appointments; organisation visits eg. schools, businesses,
medical cannabis may well be considered differently at some stage but is unlikely
community groups; some door knocking and attending community events and
in the near future.
functions. Secondly, those days in Wellington revolve around the procedures of Parliament and that includes select committees, question time and debates on
Assuming on current polling that Mr Dunne, United Future and Act aren’t
relevant legislation.
around would you see National ever working with The Greens or NZ First in coalition or even just for confidence and supply?
How do you rate National’s chances going into the next election?
Although Act and United Future may not be polling well as parties they both
It’s probably a bit early to say at this stage. However, we have a very strong
hold safe electorate seats and so will be back in Parliament. We are unlikely to
leader, a committed team, a strong work plan and people know what they are
work with the Green Party. We could do a deal with them on their environmental
getting from the Party. So these things place us in a strong position and I think
policy but they are a socialist party in respect of other issues. If they were purely
we have governed well and delivered for New Zealand. New Zealanders also
an environmental party then there wouldn’t be a problem. NZ First is possible but
wouldn’t want to put their futures at risk with the opposition party’s policies.
they would have to give up their anti-immigration stance and become welcoming
[Editor's Note: yeah, I'd hate to have a warm house, access to free education and
to new New Zealanders for us to work with them at this stage.
a living wage] 4
N.08 / V.48
LANGUAGE
News NEXUS MAGAZINE
What are your views on the current state of student housing in Hamilton
Put another way what do you feel you still want to accomplish as the
East, do you support a rental warrant of fitness?
Hamilton East MP?
There currently is a rental warrant of fitness for state owned houses in our city. It
Yes, definitely a lot more work to be done as Member of Parliament for Hamilton
becomes more difficult in regards to privately owned properties. With the higher
East. A passion of mine is immigration as I believe in making NZ open to new
costs of housing we are very mindful that any increase in the regulations on
migrants and I will keep advocating for this to happen. Also, the first part of any
landlords will inevitably mean higher rents for tenants. In the end tenants have
plan for the electorate was the link to Auckland which we have largely achieved.
the ability to choose what value they put on a rental as in whether or not to take
Now is the time to work on enhancing the link with Tauranga. I am working on
it depending on its costs relative to the state of the house. Tenants will pay more
building that road from Hamilton to Tauranga. We can also enhance our inter-
or less depending on the standard of the house and we need to enable them to
regional links in other ways as well. A good example is the University of Waikato’s
have that choice.
move to create a presence in the Bay and this is something I have promoted and seek more of that to continue. I want to see Hamilton to continue to grow and
You have been the Hamilton East MP for over a decade, what significant
prosper and I support policies and initiatives to ensure this occurs.
changes have you made in that time? It has been an honour and pleasure to serve the people of Hamilton East over
What does a David Bennett weekend off look like?
that time. I take great pride in the way our many communities from different
I like to get some time to play sports on the weekend. At the moment that has
backgrounds live and work together in a harmonious manner. I am also very proud
mainly consisted of running and in the past playing football. I also enjoy spending
of our strong student base and what they add to our city. Over the last ten years
time with my wider family.
we have achieved many things. First, the $2.1b Waikato Expressway is a massive investment in our city and region. This link to Auckland has been sought after
Our Chancellor Jim Bolger (you guys have met right?) traded in politics for
for a generation and is now a reality with completion in 2019/2020. Secondly,
an ambassadorial position for a while, What are the top three places you
the residents in the north of the electorate have sought and received three new
would like to be made an ambassador to in the future?
schools and a new one in progress. Endeavour Primary School, Rototuna Junior High School and Rototuna Senior High School will provide strong additions to the education network of Hamilton. Thirdly, the $500m redevelopment of the Waikato Hospital campus provides our city with a strong health base. Fourthly, Hamilton is the first main city to have the ultra-fast fibre network completed and this will assist in making a more connected Hamilton. Fifthly, the Velodrome in Cambridge is something I helped achieve for the Waikato. Sixthly, the internal ring route road has made a huge difference in linking the University with the
Although not something I have envisaged. I do like the countries of Russia, Chile and Mexico. Last year Nexus released the “Swipe right for Bennett” Tinder ad, did it work? Completely unsuccessful. Suppose it doesn’t help that I do not have a Tinder account.
northern suburbs of the electorate. Overall, I have concentrated on delivering the
Who would you vote for in the US Election?
infrastructure for Hamilton to take advantage of its proximity to Auckland and
Really hard question as none of the current front runners. Rubio was probably
becoming an even stronger city. This means more jobs and opportunities for our
my preferred candidate but he just didn’t perform well. So if it came down to
students and all Hamiltonians.
Hillary and Trump then I would go for Hillary. I just couldn’t vote for the Trump rhetoric and believe America needs a Republican President and so wouldn’t want
You’ve been around longer than the likes of Steven Joyce and (Former WSU
to vote for Hillary either.
President) Hekia Parata so why do they keep getting all the important jobs while you're stuck in transport?
Finally it has come to our attention that some longtime friends and
I am the Chair of the Finance and expenditure select committee and so work
employees of Nexus have been running a covert “DB 4 Mayor campaign”
closely with the Minister of Finance. The allocation of ministerial portfolios is
with only former cop James Casson declared for the mayoral run and key
something that is not in my control and my major responsibility has been in
players like Deputy Mayor Gordon Chesterman and “Business Man” Ewan
being a strong advocate and delivering for my electorate, whereas members like
Wilson out of the race is there anything that you would like to announce /
Minister Joyce and Parata are list members of Parliament and haven’t got an
declare to student media? Will you be contesting the 2016 Mayoral election?
electorate to service as such. I had previously been Chair of the Transport and
No, I am not contesting the 2016 Mayoral election but thank you for the thought
Industrial Relations select committee.
and appreciate the support.
5
NEXUS MAGAZINE News
NEWS DR STEFF EXPLAINS IT ALL JAMES RAFFAN
Like many of you playing at home Nexus has been quietly watching the US
Short of a Clinton indictment in the next month does Bernie Sanders have
political primaries and building its own drinking games:
any course of action that would lead him to be named the nominee?
Drink a shot every time Hillary says something cringeworthy and out of touch; Drink two every time Sanders sounds like a grumpy old man trying to keep you off his lawn; Don’t drink anything around Ted Cruz, he may be the zodiac killer; Drink and don’t stop drinking until after the election because Trump just became the nominee and if elected we could be in the “end times” the bible referenced.
No. There is speculation that he is going to get the 'super-delegates' that have already pledged themselves to Clinton but why would they shift to Sanders if he does not receive more votes than Clinton during the primary? How important will the Vice-Presidential picks be this year? Considering the divisions in both the Republican and Democratic parties, VP
We really didn’t know how to write an in-depth news piece on what was
selection will be significant for either candidate to try and shore up those voters
happening. Then we realised we have lecturers, with degrees on this campus and
on either side that may otherwise not come out and vote for them.
they know way more than we do. So we just put a call into Political-Science and luckily Dr Reuben Steff answered all our questions and was kind enough not to
Given both candidates failure to service the base (The evangelical right
mention too many times how stupid and wrong we were. We owe him our eternal
and the progressive left) what are the chances of this being a low-turnout
gratitude and probably a bottle of whatever they drink over there.
election?
With the suspension of Ted Cruz campaign Trump is now the presumptive nominee. To win in the general election does he need to walk back some of his extreme positions and become more moderate in the hopes of winning the base?
Dr Steff: This could be one of the highest turn-outs in recent memory. In a way both Trump and Clinton are kryptonite for one another — Clinton is part of an American dynasty and the quintessential 'establishment' candidate; Trump has never been a politician and has projected himself as a wild anti-establishment candidate that rejects any form of political correctness (even if, when you look
Trump has generated immense energy and support from around 35-40% of the
closely at some of Trump's positions and past statements, he may be more
Republican electorate, and likely has this secured for the upcoming election.
moderate on a number of issues than a significant segment of the Republican
As such, a pivot to the centre to mobilise the rest of the Republican 'base', or
Party). In this situation, turnout could be very high as both sides view the other
independents, makes some sense. However, he has already stated he will not
candidate as simply an intolerable choice for president. On the other hand,
change who he is, as he has got to where he has by being himself. But with Trump
Clinton and Trump both have significant unfavourability ratings among the US
one thing is for sure — we have no idea what he or his team is calculating (and
electorate in general (55% for Clinton, 70% for Trump), so a large segment of
even they may not) but they have outsmarted basically every political operator
voters might just stay home. But ask yourself — if you were a US voter in this
and commentator in the US, and much of the world, so the strategy they opt for
election — would you stay at home? Heck no.
during the US general election could defy any conventional wisdom we try apply. How would a Trump or Clinton Presidency impact trade and relations with The likely inclusion of Trump and Clinton would suggest this election will be largely centred around women and minorities. How could either candidate strengthen their position with these groups?
New Zealand? While Hillary Clinton has walked back her support for free trade agreements, such as the Trans-Pacific Partnership (TPP). (likely to counter the challenge from
The first part of your questions may be an incorrect assumption. For some people
Bernie Sanders on this issue, as he has claimed free trade agreements have hurt
women and minorities are a massive issue but for tens of millions of Americans
American workers) it's unlikely she will do anything drastic to alter the agreement,
jobs and the economy are more important and immediate issues (and US growth
as she has been pro-free trade in the past and support for them appears part of
has slowed down in the past three quarters) and the focus on minorities and
the American establishment. As to general relations with New Zealand under a
women is perceived to be a liberal indulgence by the despised 'elites' and 'liberal
Clinton presidency, Obama has proven to be the best US president in terms of
media' on the West and East coasts. That said, Trump will have to do better with
US-NZ relations in two decades, so if Clinton sticks to his realist approach to
both groups to win the nomination. It's hard, when applying a common sense
foreign policy we can expect the status-quo — which has been an improvement
lens, to see how he turns this around considering his past remarks, but he is a
in relations — to continue on it's current trajectory.
chameleon so expect him to change tack at the drop of a hat and do anything to try and win over women and minorities. If he sticks with a jobs mantra, then he will say women/minorities need jobs to empower themselves, which he can deliver and Clinton cannot. The truth of these kinds of statements may not matter very much, as 40% of Americans recently polled that they do not trust anything the mainstream media tells them.
Trump claims that he will pursue a foreign policy that puts 'America First' and will re-write trade agreements to be fairer to the US. TPP would be re-written to benefit US producers and industry, which would be detrimental for NZ as a small trade-dependent island nation that seeks easier access to offshore markets for its products. Trump has also said they want allies to pay more for their own defence and for the US to maintain the bulk of the global security burden. This
As to Clinton, she will want women/minorities to be an issue during the election
also requires NZ to do more to support US foreign policy objectives, in terms
as she already has an advantage here. So it could come down to a battle to
of ramping up our commitments in support of US efforts in the Middle East or
control the narrative of the election — Republicans trumping (no pun intended)
elsewhere, which could put pressure on us to increase our defence budget.
jobs, jobs, jobs — and Democrats focusing on gender/women. 6
N.08 / V.48
LANGUAGE
News NEXUS MAGAZINE
SPORTS OPINION WARRIORS WILL WIN
SPORTS OPINION ONCE WERE WARRIORS
TOM COLLOPY
FREDDY WALKER
The Warriors have started their 2016 NRL campaign with four wins and five losses
“This is the Warriors’ year.”
with consistency being an issue for the side.
I hear this statement every time the NRL season is about to kick
Top three musts for the Warriors to succeed after the international break and make
off. I have learned to laugh it off in previous years but this season
Top 8 come the end of the season:
I thought the perennial hope might be justified. We signed Isaac
1. With Jeff Robson underperforming in his seven starts in the halves this season Tuimoala Lolohea needs to start at five-eighth. We saw last season how effective Tui can be in both the fullback position and in the halves but
Luke and Roger Tuivasa-Sheck, who are both game changers, and pre season form showed enough to get excited about what could be. Yet again I (along with many other fans) have been let down.
at this point in time he is more beneficial in the halves for the Warriors. His
So what is the problem? A lot of fingers have been pointed at
fearlessness to take on the line matched with nifty footwork, fast hands
coach Andrew McFadden, and at the “bro” culture within the
and the ability to break tackles is what the Warriors need in the five-
team. I think the problem is that the Warriors are not, and never
eighth position. It will add another dimension to the Warriors' attack and
will be, good enough to win the competition.
relieve some pressure off of Shaun Johnson who has done the bulk of the playmaking this season.
The NRL, as we all know, is a 26 week round robin followed by the playoffs which the top eight of 14 teams participate in at the
2. Ryan Hoffman as club captain and a 13 season veteran, needs to lead from the
end of the round robin. The Warriors, despite all their flashy skills
front. He needs to invigorate his side through not only his leadership but his
and brilliant players, are not fit enough, nor have the discipline to
play on the field. This Warriors side needs their senior players to stand up and
keep up with the demands of a 26-week competition. The core
set an example through their behaviour on and off the field and through their
of the team are players who make decisions which leave a lot to
performances. This starts with their skipper though and if Ryan can recapture
be desired on too many an occasion and this is where the team
some form and lead by example then I can see the Warriors being successful
shoot themselves in the foot.
moving forward.
You have to feel sorry for players like Shaun Johnson, and the
3. The Warriors need to immensely improve their defence considering they've
aforementioned Luke and Tuivasa-Sheck. These guys are players
conceded the third most points in the competition so far. In the Melbourne
who would excel and win titles at any other club. Unfortunately,
Storm game especially there seemed to be a lack of communication and/
they are stuck with a team that provides so much promise but
or trust in defence. Improved defensive efforts will lead to the Warriors
delivers so little when push comes to shove. There was a time
competing at a higher level, on a more consistent basis and ultimately
where the Warriors were a team that other sides hated playing.
winning a higher percentage of their games moving forward. This is the most
The forwards used to hit hard, and the backs used to run riot. Now,
important factor to the Warriors top 8 aspirations.
the backs go out and pop prescription pills, and the forwards are
The Warriors will turn their season around. They predominantly do well over the
soft. There is no heart, no mana to the Warriors any more.
representative period as they don’t lose many players to Origin duty. Hopefully
The Warriors this season are once again a write-off. Even if they
this will provide the Warriors with enough momentum to reach the Top 8 for the
somehow manage to limp their way to the playoffs, don’t expect
first time since 2011. They have the talent to make top 8 it is whether or not they
to see them anywhere near the Grand Final. A fun team to watch
can unify and play consistent rugby league week in, week out. Keep the faith
at times yes, but a title contending team absolutely not. Why
Warriors supporters.
should we support a team that don’t value their own jersey? 7
MAUI’S FIN RUN 55 IN 55
The Waikato Students’ Union are getting 55 students to dress up like dolphins and run up Mount Maunganui in 55 minutes. Why? Because there are 55 Maui’s dolphin left and that’s what they would want us to do.
FRIDAY 20TH MAY Meeting in HTN 1.30pm Meeting in TGA 3.30pm
REGISTER NOW At wsu.org.nz/mauis and start fundraising.
PRIZES For best fundraiser and best costumes.
Check out the Waikato Students’ Union Facebook event “Maui’s Fin Run - 55 in 55” for more information
CARE NEXUS MAGAZINE
ADVOCACY JUSTICE OF THE PEACE Did you know there is a Justice of the Peace Service on Campus every Tuesday from 12-1pm and Thursday from 1–2pm in M2.09 in the Library Building? This is a FREE service, no appointment is required but times are strictly adhered to.
DIRECTOR BIO JORDAN SMITH I’m stoked with the amazing team we have on the board this year and I’m excited to see all the amazing stuff going on with the WSU this year. I’m in charge of the Environmental and Sustainability portfolio this year so I better not catch any of you guys not recycling. I’m currently in my fourth and final year of a BMS(Hons) majoring in accounting. I’m a proud resident of the hub/cesspool of student culture that is Hogan Street, and will likely live here until all of the
CLUBS MORALITY DOES NOT NEED GOD — A DEBATE When: 11 May 2016, 6pm Where: Lady Goodfellow Chapel, UoW
houses get torn down and replaced with shitty apartments (which
What is Morality? What is Goodness? What about God? Two
at the rate it’s going is about 6 months).
outspoken academics engage on the age old question: "Does
Some advice for the first years: I’m a firm believer in doing assignments drunk on the last night before they’re due and sleeping
Morality Need God?" For both religious and non-religious the question has deep implications that profoundly affect our lives.
through lectures. Class attendance has been scientifically proven to
Following the debate, there will be a time of questions and
have no effect on grades {citation needed}. Seriously though, work
answers, where you will have the opportunity to ask questions
hard, party harder and make Uni your bitch.
and pose challenges to either debater. Come ready to think and explore!
FA IR P LAY FO R F I J I The University of Waikato and the WSU are accepting donations of sports gear and sporting equipment to send to Fiji following the devastating impacts of cyclones Winston and Zena. Donations will close on May 12th so bring your gear into Level Zero or the Innovation Station.
CLUBS CLUBS MIXER II: FINANCE AND PIZZA When: Thursday 12th May, 4-6pm Where: Level Zero Need advice on how to manage money? Could you do better? Do you want free pizza? If the answer to any of these questions is yes and you’re the President, Treasurer or an Executive of an affiliated WSU Club then sign up to be part of the mixer. Either at Level Zero or by emailing clubs@wsu.org.nz 9
NEXUS MAGAZINE Entertainment
BEST OF THE WEB SHITPOST FACEBOOK PAGES GARLIC BREAD MEMES FACEBOOK.COM/GARLICBREADMEMES/ Bread is great. Butter is yum. Memes are unavoidable. You might as well fill your friends' newsfeeds with dumb ass bread memes if you insist on filling them with shit.
TRENDING ON TWITTER #ADDTHEROCKIMPROVEANYTHING darksidebob @darksidebob · May 2 Best job in Hollywood? Dwayne Johnson's lawyer. All he does is get his Rock off. #AddTheRockImproveAnything @midnight 16
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Portmanteau Jones @SadlyCatless · May 2 Please sir, I want Samoa? #AddTheRockImproveAnything @midnight RETA PERVERTSON FACEBOOK.COM/RHEADACTYL She's a chick with a dodgy undercut. Her account is as public as NZ's health care and she hangs out with super cool chicks on the weekends (the Editor is sometimes one of them). Weta never uses punctuation but mashes emojis like they're going out of fashion. And all her posts are shit. THE WORST OF TUMBLR FACEBOOK.COM/LEWORSTOFTUMBLR/ Probably a play on the Best of Tumblr (but opposite),
94
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TaiSon @AhMed_TaiSon · May 2 Excuse me, do you have a moment to talk about our ROCK and Saviour. #AddTheRockImproveAnything 9
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Sheepy Shoulders @josh_ill_us · May 2 May The Rock be with you #AddTheRockImproveAnything @midnight 49
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it's essentially the same fuckin' thing. A buttload of screenshots from Tumblr, countered by a bunch of other stupid internet things.
WINSTON PETERS FACEBOOK.COM/WINSTONPETERS/ Want a wall of xenophobic text popping up with an absurd array of reactions from the wow-face to the heart? Great, Peters' Facebook is just that. Basically the same calibre of content as Garlic Bread Memes.
PLEASE DON’T QUOTE ME
“Do they take sweary lesbian mothers in parliament?” “Get the hell out of my eye line” BILLY CONNELLY IS PISSING OFF PEOPLE IN KILLARNEY
“I thought my daughter had something important to say, nope.” PINK DEALING WITH HER COUGHING CHILD N.08 / V.48
1. Not yelling at fast food workers 2. Being salty about your part time job 3. Daydreaming of quitting your job
ANIKA MOA ASKS THE IMPORTANT QUESTIONS
10
WHAT’S HOT
LANGUAGE
WHAT’S NOT 1. Yelling at fast food workers 2. Leaving used tampons on the ground 3. Wiping faeces on the wall
Hākinakina – Semester A 2016 Date:
Wednesday 11th May 2016
Time:
12.30-3.30pm
Venue: University fields* Sports: Touch, netball and tug of war Contact your Māori Mentor Coordinator before Friday 6th May to register! Email tepunatautoko@waikato.ac.nz for more information *All updates will be posted on the Te Puna Tautoko Facebook page including the change of venue in case of wet weather
NEXUS MAGAZINE
POETRY BEAST FEAST BY CODY-ROSE CLEVIDENCE JOSHUA MORRIS
“Queerne/ssnecessi/ tatesarad/ icalizedl/ anguage” is the thesis statement of Cody-Rose Clevidence’s Beast Feast, a collection of poetry. Cody-Rose Clevidence is a genderqueer, self-professed anarchist who writes with the crazed euphoria of someone in love with the world and against it all at once. The form of each poem is exciting and erratic. A forest of words that defies sense on first reading and even defies easy reading at all. Some pieces look like they have been rescued from a dying machine, written amongst bubbling nonsensical artefacts of grammar and symbols. I felt the meaning of the pieces, only ever half understanding what was going on at any one point. It is in this space of lucid confusion and sensory overload that Clevidence thrives. They use language like a weapon creating bulging structures of fractured imagery. Their aim is rusted yet true. Every piece is at once impenetrably dense and painfully personal. Clevidence destroys any preconception of natural and unnatural tearing down boundaries of gender in the process. It is something that often goes awry when message becomes more important than the art but in this case the sentiment of “political as personal” wins out to
FOOD OSTEN
resounding blood soaked success. If you ever get the chance to read this, fucking do so, it is intelligent, messy, brave, brutally honest, and once it takes hold there is no denying the stunning beauty on offer here.
BRITTANY ROSE
“Is an arsenal enough to free an orchard? Swampthing inebriate. I’ll arm a garden. We can live there.” Osten sprung up late last year when the imposing car dealership on the corner of Clyde and Grey Sts opened, and if their Instagram is anything to go by, they have a warm atmosphere and photogenic coffee. It's a bit tricky to find the front entrance (and there's no parking) but once you sneak past the cars that cost the same as your student loan and slide through the glass door you'll find yourself in a little bubble of cuteness that feels nothing like it's
MUSIC RADICAL DUDE! BY GETTER BY THE LOCAL DROPOUT LYAM BUCHANAN
surrounded by sterile steel. The interior hosts a neutral colour palette with geometric repeating patterns and white stencils on the windows. The tables outside feel surprisingly private considering they're only a few metres from a set of traffic lights, and have small wildflower posies. Even the plates are in theme with gemetric stencils.
Good old fashioned fucking filth. In early March everyone’s favourite Facebook personality, Getter, released his latest album, Radical Dude!. After captivating the hearts of every teenage boy with his catchphrase ‘suh dude’, he chucked this plump sack of an album to leak hemorrhage inducing drops and seizure causing buildups everywhere it went. It you were all about the dubstep craze back in
Two cakes and two coffees for $20 places the food at fairly usual
2011, or even in the early 2000’s, then this album will send your earbuds into a
cafe prices, and the coffee isn't bad (even though the milk's got
nostalgically nauseating endless spiral of cheap drugs and accidentally dying
a little too much air in it). It's not wet yourself good, but it's sure
during pre drinks.
asf better than the grainy shit Momento grind. There are a bunch of cute details around the place, including the coconut sugar in a cork-lided jar. The highlight was the beetroot and salted caramel brownie. The salted caramel was served as a glob in a small white bowl alongside the plain natural dipping yoghurt. The beetroot was thickly grated, moistening the brownie, and the sweetness was nicely balanced by the yoghurt.
With tracks crustier than your flatmates' foreskin this collection is all you need to get hyped before getting banned from town. From ‘Blood’ to ‘666!’ there isn’t a track that won’t make you feel like you’re mashed out of your mind on some highly legal substances. If you’re looking for something which mildly resembles something musical then ‘Rip N Dip’ is your best bet, while still being a cesspit of drops and build ups there’s still hints of something legitimate hiding within this track. Maybe Getter was actually semi sober during the birth of this track? Jump
Overall, Osten is well worth a visit, even just to add some variety
onto whatever music streaming service you've locked yourself into and let the filth
to your op-shopping caffeine breaks.
of Radical Dude! consume you.
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N.08 / V.48
LANGUAGE
Reviews NEXUS MAGAZINE
FILM THE HUNTSMAN: WINTER'S WAR JARED WOOLDRIDGE
Snow White and the Huntsman, "Why? Just, why?" was my reaction. However, weirdly enough I ended up liking that movie, but there are not enough why’s in the world to explain how the prequel Winter's War movie came about. The Huntsman, a supporting character in the original fairy tale, bumped up to co-lead for the moderately successful first movie, gets his own sequel/spin-off? Why? So, the movie picks up years before Snow White and the Huntsman, with a quick check-in with Evil Queen Charlize Theron’s tragically evil sister, Elsa. Sorry, no, it’s Emily Blunt as the Ice Queen. After that though, fast forward to the future, where Chris Hemsworth’s Huntsman has to deal with a troubled romance and a missing magic mirror, while the two evil queens do their evil things all over the place.I will say this; the magic, the locations, the people, everything looks beautiful, and the cast give it their all, but it’s not enough to save the movie they’re in. It's the perfect film to watch if you want to feast your eyes, but have your brain turn to mush.
THEATRE THE ADDAMS FAMILY A NEW MUSICAL COMEDY GEORGIA POLLOCK
When people complain about pointless sequels (like 2 Fast 2 Furious) this is the sort of movie they’re talking about. It’s just such a lazy movie, it feels little more than a factory-made blockbuster by any old studio. They’ve obviously put the money into it, what with the effects, the actors, and the costumes, but in the end, it just all makes me think of the analogy of a nice ass. You can look at it, understand it’s beauty, but you just know there’s nothing inside but crap.
Where: Riverlea Theatre, 83 Riverlea Road When: May 14th-28th Tickets: from iticket or at the Riverlea Theatre box office We all remember the classic Addams Family movie and TV series, right? Well, now it’s been made into a musical! Wednesday is all grown up… and she’s found love. He’s a normal boy, with a normal family. Much to the dismay of the Addams’, Wednesday has invited them for dinner (where
FILM THE JUNGLE BOOK BRONWYN LAUNDRY
they’re going to announce their engagement!) It makes for a really interesting night of love, terror, and self-discovery. This is going to be an amazing show. It’s funny, exciting, and strangely relatable. Director Nick Wilkinson says, “We have a great show to put on. It’s been amazing to see it develop into the spectacular show that it is. I’m sure everyone will love it.” A mixture of funny, sad, and heart-warming songs punctuate the show. My personal favourite is 'What if', sung by Pugsley Addams, Wednesdays little brother. He’s worried about Wednesday’s new boyfriend, and the fact that she might not torture him now that she’s in a relationship. He sings, “what if she never tortures me anymore? What if she never nails my tongue to the bathroom floor?” Even if you don’t know anything about the Addams family, don’t be put off. This is a show for fans and non-fans alike — there are some wonderful jokes and references, but if you know nothing about them at all it’s still funny.
I was feeling incapable of adulting during the teaching recess so I went and saw the new adaption of The Jungle Book to reminisce about the simpler days. It was hard to ignore the fact there was a girl aged about five sitting next to me who literally asked her mum to go to the toilet 10 times, and that my friend had paid $6 for a bottle of water that turned out to be sparkling but despite all that, the movie was still fantastic. The film was visually stunning and the kid playing Mowgli should be highly commended for working with all the visual effects and still creating a sense of actually being in the jungle. All the comedic moments were well timed and it was a good balance of adult content and kid friendly content. Bill Murray as the voice of Baloo and Christopher Walken as King Louie were definitely the highlights, and I got way too exciting when they sang ‘Bare Necessities’ and ‘I Wanna Be Like You’ respectively. The storyline itself was a little confusing and I couldn’t quite remember if it was a remake of the original or a reimagining, but it had a pretty great overarching theme of humans and their disrespect for jungles/animals/the planet in general. All in all, I definitely don’t regret actually paying for a movie ticket. 13
NEXUS MAGAZINE Arts
ARTS THE LITERARY SALON PETER DORNAUF
The Literary Salon is back after a couple of centuries hiatus.
The University was also represented by members of Dr.
And it’s happening here in Hamilton.
Tracey Slaughter’s English and Creative Writing Programme
They were all the rage back in the day among the smart
who presented a selection of works, poetry and prose,
literary and intellectual set in France and Italy during the
from Mayhem Anthology. By turns witty, satirical, heartfelt
18th century and earlier. Held in coffee houses, hotels, even
and cleverly constructed, the students revealed that the
bedrooms, they attracted the chattering classes, people like
literary landscape in these islands is in good shape. 'Once
Voltaire who was happy to promulgate the Enlightenment
Upon a Pretty Girl' by K-t Harrison must be the shrewdest
ideals of liberty, equality and fraternity to minds primed for
title I’ve heard in awhile. Hamish Ansley did a mean 'OCD'
insurgency. In a sense the salon became the seedbed for
while 'Windows' and 'Bottles' by Erin Doyle came with an
revolutionary thought, challenging the social and political
emotional bite.
constructs of the ancient regime.
gathering of her work in progress, a book that dealt with the
aspirations, but it certainly is a lively affair, its first
history of food. It was a fascinating insight into the role food
meeting of the year conducted just recently in the foyer
plays in the social dynamic of cultures and communities.
of the Meteor Theatre. The seating arrangements were
Just think of the bread and wine in the communion service
enough themselves to recommend attendance. Old large
and its potent symbolism, or the feast Dido prepared for
comfortable armchairs, dragged from the Green Room, were
Aeneas as precursor to personal disclosure about the Trojan
positioned in a semicircle giving patrons an amphitheatre
War. Food becomes elemental in ritual and operates also as
view of proceedings while they sipped sophistically on their
a mood changer.
complimentary wine.
The third speaker introduced the audience to his published
The brainchild of Browsers Bookshop proprietor, Rachel Pope, the salon’s first outing of the year proved a great success with upward of 80 people cosily ensconced in their snug sofas and
AUTEUR CHRISTINA RICCI RICHARD SWAINSON
and intellectual history that covered everything from the modern to the postmodern. The Literary Salon has had a new lease of life and Hamilton
and Shakespearean raconteur, Dr. Mark Houlahan.
is showing the way.
The other day a semi-regular customer of Auteur House had
direction, the American cousin in the quaint Irish coming of
a request. He was looking for the 1991 feature The Addams
age story Last of the High Kings and The Ice Storm, Ang
Family. I could but admire his taste. Sadly, a quick search
Lee's seriocomic take on the 1970s wife-swapping culture.
confirmed what I already suspected. We don't have that title in stock.
It was as the experimental, seductive teenage daughter in The Ice Storm that Ricci came of age. The year that followed,
It's a curious omission given my long standing enthusiasm for
her 18th, proved a career high point. Of the five films she
the actress whose career was made by The Addams Family.
appeared in 1998 two stand out: Buffalo 66, Vincent Gallo's
Christina Ricci was only 11 at the time but her perfectly
brilliantly dark feature film debut and The Opposite of Sex,
deadpan, ironic reading of Wednesday Addams stole the
a talky drama which sees Christina as a knocked up teen
movie from such veterans as Anjelica Huston and Raul Julia.
on the run with a gay lover. In a just world Ricci would have
With her pale skin, high forehead, jet black hair and large
won an Oscar. In the world we've got she had to settle for a
and beguiling eyes Ricci seemed a lot older than her years
Golden Globe nomination.
sexuality. She had a certain stillness. A star was born.
N.08 / V.48
600 page history book, How We Were Made, a cultural
loungers with proceedings directed by that popular player
yet her appeal went beyond any suggestion of underaged
14
Wintec tutor and writer, Gayle Pittaway, appraised the
The Hamilton reincarnation may not have such lofty
Ricci's career since has been erratic. Turning producer, she made two duds in a row: Prozac Nation, from the Elizabeth
If the Ricci talent was confirmed in the Addams Family sequel
Wurtzel book of the same name and Pumpkin, a very black
two years later her early lead vehicles were an imperfect fit.
comedy about a privileged sorority girl having a relationship
Casper lacked magic, Now and Then saw her suffering from
with an intellectually handicapped boy. Only in Black Snake
anorexia, a problem that led to a sub-par performance and
Moan, a wonderful piece of retro-exploitation with the
That Darn Cat, though underrated, never attracted the same
actress as a scantily clad nymphomaniac imprisoned by
audience as the Disney original. She was better in small
Samuel L. Jackson's well-meaning reformer, has the Ricci
parts: Bastard Out of Caroline, under old co-star Huston's
potential come close to being realised.
LANGUAGE
put on Broadway shows in my car/shower and can rap the fast bit of Rap God. 4. Kaleidoscope and anal-probing.
THE IT GUY MATTHEW RAE 1. Technology nerd stuffs 2. Getting invited to all the super cool, top secret parties. I assume there are cool, top secret parties — I wouldn't know, I've only just started. 3. I play guitar and I can draw pretty well too. I'm the president of Volume on Campus and we strive to help all creatives. Oh, I also give free guitar lessons to students that want them. 4. My favourite word is phalanges and least is bae if that is even a word.
HEIL HOGAN & MODERNDAY MIXTAPE LYAM BUCHANAN 1. Glorious Hamilton East. 2. It’s a solid distraction from everything I should actually be doing. Getting to view the tragic drunk snaps we get sent is also a definite highlight. 3. Serenade stray cats with my guitar and send super sweet snaps — add lyamtb or nexusmag if you need some Lyam lovin’. 4. I don’t think I have a favourite word but I do say ‘breezy’ and ‘dude’ more than anyone ever should. My least would easily be ‘lit’ along with ‘af’ and ‘fam’.
TRAVELLING: JUST THE TIP NINA FOX 1. Travel. Fucking up. 2. I get to get amongst the student culture and really encourage travelling to my peers. I'm sounding like the 'cool mom' off Mean Girls aye? 3. I'm trying to pursue a career in doing fa and getting paid to travel. Follow @ ninzfox on Gram so that one day I'm approached for product endorsement. 4. Favourite word (I guess more of a phrase is): 'Later Bol' and least favourite word is 'hey' used instead of 'aye' (my friend's turning into an Aussie).
NERD YORK TIMES JARED WOOLDRIDGE 1. Pointless nerdy ramblings 2. Being able to go on pointless rambles, knowing someone, somewhere might be reading. Plus, it gives me an excuse to be really judgemental. Above all, the highlight is writing something without the anxiety of it being graded. 3. Yeah, I'm not a creative person. I can cook, and I write other things. 4. Favourite word, anything large enough to confuse the person I'm talking with. Least favourite? Hazard, because I say it funny and people laugh at me.
COVERED NEXUS COLUMNISTS
publicity is good publicity. 3. I have a very basic bish Insta. Sometimes I write stuff for other magazines. I also
1. What is your column about? Describe it in 3 words.
Carrie Bradshaw." Or the hilarious insults people post on Yik Yak. Any
2. What's the highlight of writing for Nexus?
2. When my best friend read the first column and said "You sound like a trashy
3. What other creative stuff do you do? (Here you can plug a blog or Spotify or Instagram or whatever if you'd like)
1. Relatable nonsense, hopefully.
4. What's your favourite & least favourite word?
EXPECTATIONS VS REALITY BRONWYN LAUNDRY
DEAF.ORG.NZ/NZSLW-RESOURCES
Proudly supported by NEW ZEALAND SIGN LANGUAGE FUND
Feature NEXUS MAGAZINE
FEATURE NEW ZEALAND SIGN LANGUAGE WEEK BRITTANY ROSE
Language use is about communication, but not all communication is verbal.
How well is NZSL integrated into the public sphere? Where can
Everyday we read others' body language, but for some reading physical
improvements be made?
gesture is a lot more significant. We spoke to Victoria Manning from Deaf
There are many requests from within the deaf community and the public for
Aotearoa to find out more about New Zealand Sign Language.
NZSL promotion, awareness and teaching to happen throughout the year and not just for one week of the year. Ongoing funding of NZSL Week is an issue. As
It's currently New Zealand Sign Language (NZSL) Week, what is it all about?
a national event working to promote and maintain one of New Zealand’s three
It’s a chance for the Deaf community to celebrate our wonderful language and to
official languages, there should be government funds tagged for NZSL Week
share our language with all New Zealanders.
each year. Currently, Deaf Aotearoa have to apply for funding to various charities and funds, which makes planning very difficult.
How long have we had NZSL Week? NZSL became an official language of New Zealand in 2006 when the NZSL
How does NZSL differ from other versions of sign language?
Act was passed into law. Gaining official language status was an impetus for
Each country has their own sign language. Australian Sign Language (AUSLAN)
celebrating and showcasing our language more. Deaf Aotearoa organised
is different to NZSL, and different again to British Sign Language (BSL) and
the first New Zealand Sign Language (NZSL) Week in 2007. This year we are
American Sign Language (ASL). There is an online NZSL dictionary with info on
celebrating our 10th NZSL Week and 10 years of official language status.
the history and lexicon of sign languages.
Deaf Aotearoa are the organising body behind NZSL Week — what exactly
Alongside te reo, sign language is an official language of New Zealand —
is the group?
how many people communicate using NZSL?
Deaf Aotearoa is a non-government organisation representing the voice of deaf
NZ’s last census showed that more than 20,000 people can use NZSL, and an
people, and the national service provider for deaf people in New Zealand. Deaf
estimated 7,000 - 9,000 of these NZSL users are deaf people.
Aotearoa also works closely with deaf communities, government agencies and other organisations to increase awareness, promote NZSL and strengthen the
Is NZSL a signing version of English? Or is it a separate language in itself?
rights of deaf people. Deaf Aotearoa is one of 133 ordinary members of the World
NZSL is not a signing version of English. NZSL has its own grammatical structure
Federation of the Deaf and is also the New Zealand representative.
and linguistic features different to English and different to Maori. Natural sign languages do not originate from, nor match, a spoken language — they have an
It has now been a decade since NZSL became an official language — how
independent structure and system of meaning based in the visual experience of
has this positively impacted on the deaf community?
deaf people. Just like spoken languages, sign languages have grammatical rules
NZSL Week has had a significant impact over time. One example is the number
for creating sentences. The rules of New Zealand Sign Language are different from
of NZSL Taster Classes, which have grown from 40 taster classes in 2007 to
the rules of English. The word order in a sentence in NZSL is often different to that
750+ taster classes in 2016. Media coverage has grown significantly, with
in an English sentence. There is also not always a one-for-one correspondence
opportunities becoming available across all channels. The NZSL Awards have
between an English word and a New Zealand Sign Language sign.
served to highlight the work and achievements of people and organisations that have championed NZSL in their own way. As a result deaf people have
Families of deaf people will likely need to use sign language, alongside
commented on the increased awareness, understanding and acceptance of
speaking are they therefore bi-lingual?
NZSL in society, and subsequently having greater pride in our language. More
Deaf people who use NZSL as their first or preferred language mostly can also
hearing people know a little bit of NZSL. Many deaf people have commented
converse in written English and so are bi-lingual. Similarly, hearing people who
on how their life has changed for the better over the last 10 years as a result of
use English as their first or preferred language and can also communicate in
better understanding.
NZSL are bi-lingual. 17
NEXUS MAGAZINE Feature
FEATURE PRESCRIPTIVISM ON TRIAL MEGGIE BOLTON
The court proceedings begin with an impassioned opening statement by Mrs Mod, outlining how Mr. Pilkunnussija’s rigid, prescriptivist views on grammar and language are unjust and harm people for whom English is a second language, those with learning disabilities, and the new generation of linguistic revolutionaries, especially young women. Stonewall stands to give his opening statement, and it’s a deliberate counterpoint, calm and measured. He dismisses Mod’s hysterics as a symptom of her latinblood. He argues that Mr. Pilkunnussija only acted with society's best interests at heart, to educate and maintain the purity and tradition of the English language.
We've all met someone who likes to correct typos on Facebook with a
These people who use your instead of you’re are asking for it, to be corrected.
condescending asterisk, that someone who corrects you when you say "Me and a friend", rather than "A friend and I". We all find those people annoying, and Meggie Bolton has some Strong Feelings on the topic of grammar. In her daydreams she attended the trial of fictional linguistics lecturer, Justin Pilkunnussija. Read on to witness prescriptivism get its come-uppance. Today marks the beginning of the trial of Dr. Justin Pilkunnussija, charged with multiple accounts of racism, ableism and sexism. This case has been closely watched by readers and writers alike, all eagerly awaiting the jury’s verdict, as this may well spell an end to the descriptivism vs prescriptivism debate that has been dividing language lovers for decades. The Descriptivists in the crowd eagerly cheer for Novita Mod, as they wish to see an end to the stringent rules
TESTIMONY #1 RACISM Mrs. Mod’s first witness is linguistics major Sally Braugh, who is testifying that she has seen Dr. Pilkunnussija put down international students for not speaking English ‘properly’ and that the students were not eligible for the tutoring position because their accents were an "annoyance". Sally explains that “Discouraging people from speaking English deprives them of valuable learning experiences, and if they cannot learn English, that creates many other barriers.” This, Braugh contends, is evidence of Dr. Pilkunnussija’s prescriptivist discrimination. By excluding people for whom English is a second language from academic and career opportunities he is also preventing them from achieving said level of proficiency.
of grammar that attempt to hobble the growth and evolution of language. The
Under cross-examination Sally readily accedes that an understanding of the
Prescriptivists seem to be slightly more reserved, unsurprising seeing as many
language a company functions in is necessary for employees to perform well, but
of them believe that the rules of grammar, which Dr. Pilkunnussija is seen as
interjects that “racism takes many forms, not all of them overt, even the spell-
upholding, are necessary for maintaining sense and order in language. This trial
check we use on our computers could be construed as passively racist every time
may well be the trial of the millennium.
it tries to tell an international student their name is wrong. Dr. Pilkunnussija’s
Prosecutor Novita Mod — first to arrive in court today, wears a tight black ensemble by Chanel, showcasing her post-baby body. Mrs. Mod is establishing
actions perpetuate the idea that because something is different, it is wrong”.
her career comeback after having her firstborn, and this case will likely make or
TESTIMONY #2 ABLEISM
break it for her.
The next witness is called to testify for the charge of ableism. Miss Jordan,
Defending Justin Pilkunnussija is barrister Dick Stonewall, esteemed member of
Pilkunnussija’s secretary reports feeling constantly put down by him because of
the New Zealand Law Society and Criminal Bar Association. Stonewall has over
his critique of her spelling, despite knowing full well she has dyslexia and that
10 years experience in criminal law, and graduated from Auckland Law School
spelling is difficult for her. As Jordan put it “most people can read a word so
with honours.
long as there is context, and the right letters. I know he can understand what
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LANGUAGE
Feature NEXUS MAGAZINE
I write because he knows how to correct me, so why does he get so hung up
told these young women that the way in which they spoke was wrong, he wasn’t
on the spelling of a word? It’s an unfair disadvantage all because my brain
just continuing the oppression of women’s voices and teaching them silence, he
works differently to his, and that of the people who decided on the spelling of
was stunting the natural growth of the English language.”
all these words.” This testimony cuts to the heart of the the descriptivism vs prescriptivism debate happening throughout this trial. If the purpose of language is to communicate, and the language someone uses achieves that purpose, does it matter if they did not follow the standardised rules of their language? Stonewall argues that it does in his cross examination.
Despite Helena’s eloquence in the defense of the young women’s language use, Stonewall is gearing up for a brutal cross examination. “What about the context Ms. Jordan was so emphatic about? Do you agree that context is important?” to which Ms. Raumolin agrees. “Then is it not important for young girls to understand that within the context of the internet or their
“Miss. Jordan, can you tell me the difference in meaning between the sentences
peer group, that kind of language may be tolerated, but when conversing in an
“Let’s eat Grandpa!” and “Let’s eat, [comma] Grandpa!”. Jordan acknowledges
academic or business setting they need to understand what is appropriate and
that these two sentences mean different things “And is it not true, that one of Dr.
what is not?”
Pilkunnussija’s most common corrections in your writing was indeed comma use,
Raumolin shoots back “The way the world of academia and business are currently
regardless of spelling?” To Jordan’s tight nod he continues “and you yourself just
run — yes. They seek to maintain a hegemony and exclude young women from
noted how a comma can affect the meaning of sentence!” Stonewall concludes.
breaking it.”
Jordan however, has more left to say, “But context tells people what you mean as much as punctuation does!”. TESTIMONY #3 SEXISM
The closing statements are upon us, and the expected outcome of this trial has shifted considerably. Mod tells the jury that the accused had used the fallacy of ‘proper’ English to assault the confidence of his international students and perpetuate the cycle of racial oppression. He harassed Ms. Jordan because of
Mod’s next witness is Helena Raumolin, an expert on linguistic evolution and
her disability and engaged in needless pedantry. He intimidated young girls into
revolution. In Raumolin’s testimony she tells the court how the accused had told
silence, and in so doing attempted to murder the next generation of linguistic
a group of first year girls that no one would ever take them seriously if they
change. He deserves to be relegated to the irrelevant annals of history.
continued to say ‘like’ all the time, that the words they were using ‘weren’t real’ and that he told the girls “I just can’t listen to you you when you talk like that”.
Stonewall’s rebuttal elicits some mutters in the crowd however. He says that clearly the accused has been gravely misunderstood. At which there is a
“In the study I conducted with Terttu Nevalainen, we found that in the
muttering of “despite his good grammar”. The accused, Stonewall argues, is an
Shakespearean era, a time of considerable linguistic change, young female
educator and a curator, he seeks to maintain the fidelity of the language we love,
writers were quickest to adapt their style, they were the linguistic innovators of
and that he corrects the mistakes of those around him not just to prevent their
the time. This, I think, has not changed. If those girls did not make those changes
erosion of his high standard of language, but to help them learn to rise to it.
back then, the rules we currently have for language would be wildly different, but
“Without order, there is chaos, and grammar is important for maintaining order”.
we attribute those changes to the mild aged man who made them ‘legitimate’. Women are changing language today as well. There are new words that originate from technology, like ‘selfie’ and ‘defriend’. Some words have changed their meaning, like ‘like’ and ‘literally’. New portmanteaus, the combination of two words together to make a new word, have come into usage like ‘hangry’ or
After a short break the the jury is back from their deliberation. The judge asks “What say you, Mr. Foreman, as to complaint wherein the defendant is charged with discrimination on the basis of race, ability and sex? Is he guilty or not guilty?”
‘adorkable’. These words tend to be used by young women. So when Pilkunnussija 19
NEXUS MAGAZINE Feature
FEATURE LOST IN TRANSLATION BRONWYN LAUNDRY
Anyone who's been overseas and spoken to locals will likely have been called out for using the classic "yeah, nah" — it's as prevalent in our vocab as tiki and pukeko are in a souvenir shop. The Niu Zeelund accent has a super lax approach to vowel sounds (I heard a rumour we pretty much omit short e sounds — like in "meh" — from our speech), and a pretty lazy approach to communication. Unsurprisingly this can be a bit confusing for a young girl who comes from the land of maple trees, so we asked resident Canadian, Bronwyn Laundry, to rank kiwi slang from least to most confusing. Technically, I’m a foreigner. I have a New Zealand passport and 13 years of New Zealand schooling to prove otherwise, but this does not appease some. I have tried endlessly over the years to try and fit in with New Zealand folk, but my strangely mixed Canadian accent betrays me as an imposter. A moose in sheep’s clothing, if you will. New Zealanders and Canadians aren’t really all that different, we both say ‘Eh’ a lot at the end of sentences and are technically ruled by that old English lady that nobody in either country actually cares about (Come at me, Lizzie). However, my first impression of New Zealand was a country school where kids ran around barefoot without fear of tetanus, asked me if I could “speak Canadian” and shared their soccer field with a paddock of cows. I’ll never forget my first Ag Day; on the walk to school some girl’s pet lamb dropped dead. You could say it was a bit of a culture shock. So in my scientific anthropological research over the years, I have studied the Kiwi (human, not bird) and their language. This extensive research has been in order to replicate the speech of the Kiwi and therefore be accepted into the pack. In this research I have noticed some interesting speaking patterns, and I thought I would compile a list of the slang I’ve learned, with helpful translations, and some further questions, hoping to shed some light on the intriguing species. Let’s first begin by getting some obvious ones out of the way. If you don’t know what 'sweet as', 'choice', 'mean', or 'she’ll be right' mean, I can’t help you. 20
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Feature NEXUS MAGAZINE
Bro/Mate/Cuz/Cuzzie/Cuzzie Bro – Your friend/homie/blood relative/random
Chuur – Also see, ‘Chea’ and just ‘Chhh’ — Can use as many ‘u’s as necessary
passerby on the street/someone you just met at a party/someone you don’t
to show enthusiasm. An informal thanks, or like saying sweet as. I think it’s an
know the name of but are trying to be discreet until you can ask someone what
evolution of cheers? Can also mean you’re impressed with something or just
their name is/anyone, really.
generally as an exclamation, for example, “Chuuur, her ass was mean bro.” You
Hungus – A hungry ass person. Angus – Similar to hungus. An angry ass person. Yeah, nah… - Basically signalling you’re indecisive asf about something. Dumb – Used mainly by adolescents to describe literally everything. Eg: “That’s dumb.” “He’s dumb.” “You’re dumb.” “Your mum’s dumb.” GC – No, not the terrible “reality” show about the Gold Coast. We all know what this means. The highest praise one can bestow. Not to be said in the presence of your mum. Shout – My treat. You probably won’t hear this a lot around University, unless it’s your flatmate shouting you a packet of Mi Goreng because you spent all your food money on online shopping and alcohol. Gumboots – Wellingtons. Total shock when I was overseas and they had no idea what a gumboot was. Another +1 to New Zealand for slang that actually makes sense. Boot made of gum? Genius. Suss – Suspect/dodgy, also to sort something out. Another fun double meaning that I have no idea how it originated. For example “Hey, can you suss me something fun to take for this weekend?” “Sorry my drug dealer is acting a bit suss lately.” Pikelet – Baby pancakes. Little discs of heaven served with jam and cream your Nana makes. <3 Jandals – Described as a ‘light sandal’. Everyone is the world seems to have an opinion on what they should be called. I don’t quite know why they’re called jandals, jazzy sandals? Regardless, thongs is ridiculous and flip flops is too babyish, so we’ll go with jandals. +1 point to New Zealand. Pissed/Trollied/Wasted/Munted/Smashed/Hammered/Wrecked/Out To It/ Off Your Face - A state of drunkenness often observed at The Outback on a Thursday night. You could probably even say “Man I was sooo Car-Parked last night!” and Kiwis would understand. Fascinating.
can basically use it however you like. Or something. I don’t really know. We’re off to a great start. Faa – Not quite sure if it’s short for fuck or far out, but this one has a double meaning, depending on how many ‘a’s you wish to use. For example, if you were to say “Faa” one would assume what you are about talk about was not that exciting, but if you were to say “Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa” you would be expressing great enthusiasm. Chocka/chocka block – Full. Used primarily by my very Kiwi mum and other old people. You’re all good – It’s OK, thanks. I’ve found this one confuses people the most while overseas, they’ll often look at you like you’re insane and then repeat the question like they already knew they were, in fact, all good. Not even or Not even Ow – Not true. Popularised by the TV show bro’Town, but I’m not sure if I’ve ever actually heard anyone say it in a serious context. I did once own a t shirt with it written in big pink letters when I was 10, given to me by an unnamed family member. I wish I was joking. I also had the ‘Beached As Bro’ singlet from Supre. It feels good to get that off my chest. Giz a squiz – May I please have a look, kind sir? Wop wops – The Canadian translation for this would be “Butt-fuck nowhere” but idk if I’m allowed to say that. Bach – Holiday home. Honestly this one still confuses the shit out of me because where on earth did this word come from? Was it named after the first ever mansion on The Bachelor? Am I too emotionally invested in The Bachelor? Probably. Stop judging me. I’m a mess. #TeamFleur Togs – Swimsuit. This one I really struggled with as a child, I would say swimsuit and get laughed at like I was the completely ridiculous one and TOGS was a logical thing to call a SUIT you wear when you SWIM. I’m not still bitter about that though. Not at all. I just think it’s funny how…
Dairy – Also see, dazza, daz, etc. A convenience store. The home of the $2 pie
So there you have it folks, an official and well-educated report of the New
and “cola” combo that saves the life of many hungover, still drunk from last night,
Zealand language based on my 13 years of extensive research. But don’t quote
or poor students on a daily basis. A sacred place that you can go to barefoot and/
me on that.
or in your pyjamas and you won’t be judged. Bless the dairy. 21
NEXUS MAGAZINE Your Space
YOUR SPACE BLEAKLEY BUNCH This is a dream house. If you're a pre-internet 12 year old. Which we basically all are at heart. The first thing you see walking up the driveway is a giant teddy bear, staring out of the glass double doors at you — it's disconcerting, but intruiging. Inside there is just SO MUCH COOL SHIT, we didn't even get a chance to put it all in this spread. There was a toy stegosaurus, heaps of lego and a gigantic Brendon McCullum wearing sick shades and a flower crown.
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Your Space NEXUS MAGAZINE
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NEXUS MAGAZINE Columns
MODERN DAY MIXTAPE V5
THAT TIME I... MADE LONDON BRIDGE FALL DOWN
LYAM BUCHANAN
G. HALSEY
If you’re on the hunt for the latest and greatest 4 chord anthem it’s time to run
WOMAN, 22, BISEXUAL
back to your happy little hovel because I can guarantee V5 is definitely not
Near the top of my sexual bucket list is a MMF threesome – two guys for
going to be your cup of tea. This week’s playlist is an array of experimental, art-
every girl (in the immortal words of Peaches) sounds like a great time for me,
rock and shoegaze; featuring bands such as Slint, El Ten Eleven and American
a girl. I also have a thing for British accents, probably a result of too much
Football, this collection is everything you need to revel in the alternative glory
Jane Austen as a child. To my great delight two ex-pats from the motherland
of the small town American ‘90s.
wound up at a party at my house and both were relatively easy on the (vodka
Complex rhythms and ambient layering set these songs apart from other pieces within the same era. From prominently math-rock/art-rock driven bands such as Slint and American Football, to the more atmospheric and
blurry) eye. They were more like Ali G than Mr Darcy, but the accents were good enough and in the dark the only thing that gives away a chav is the gold necklace smacking you in the face with every thrust.
experimental heavy such as El Ten Eleven, the influence of minimalist
I was having trouble deciding between the two, dithering to the point that
composers is strongly evident throughout.
they went away together and apparently decided to go halvsies. I was
Each of these songs feature in albums which are considered to be some of the most influential and defining of their generation. Having been released between ‘91 to ‘99 these albums were valued so highly that by 2014 each had
thrilled with the prospect and immediately agreed, but first I needed a drink and wound up with a bottle of bright green “homemade midori” from some chronically annoying bint that I was glad to see leave the party not long later.
been remastered and rereleased. This created another surge in popularity,
Having skulled the green goblin's juice I went forth to do battle with TWO
introducing a whole new generation to a style which had evolved so quickly
SWORDS (!!!!). It all went fairly well, we actually managed the mythical
that it’s origins had nearly been completely forgotten. One of these albums,
London Bridge or spitroast and I was really pleased it was built with genuine
‘Spiderland’ by Slint, has such a strong storytelling aspect and is widely
Londoners. We switched things up and I ended up on top, jiggling about
recognised as one of the most defining albums of it’s genre. Even though the
rather unpleasantly. I was enthusiastic still but at the time it was not my
original was released 15 years ago it is still performed in full at festivals and
favourite position (too much jiggling) and my inebriation level was high
gigs; this sets ‘Spiderland’ in a league of it’s own as it’s unheard of for an
enough to produce motion sickness. I suddenly realized that this was a lethal
album to be played in it’s entirety live.
combination and I had to initiate emergency puke procedures. I literally leapt
One of the strongest pieces is 'My Only Swerving'. Not only is the opening bass line so memorable but the subtle progression and layering make it a staple
from atop of my throne of cock and dashed to the window, barely making it in time to empty my guts.
within the genre. Other notable pieces would include Never Meant and Stay
It turns out someone else had slipped some morphine into the annoying
Home from American Football, these songs are so mellow and easy to listen to
bitch's “homemade midori”. I was absolutely fine after a good chunder and
yet complex enough that you hear something new each time. The tone they’ve
a smoke, but only one of my poor English gentlemen was still keen for some
created is so clean yet so vintage; imagine finding an unopened old school
reason. His loss, woke up with lube up my bum so pretty sure the other dude
polaroid camera in your attic (except being financially stable enough that you
scored anal.
didn’t have to sell it) and you somehow converted that into sound, this is the only way to really describe the tone they’ve managed to create. If this sounds like a bit of you jump on Spotify, search up nexusmagazine and give V5 a jam.
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Columns NEXUS MAGAZINE
THE I.T. GUY ROBOTS, AI & LANGUAGE
TRAVELLING: JUST THE TIP TIPS FOR HOSTELS
MATTHEW RAE
NINA FOX
Language is the basis of modern technology. The goal is to artificially
I know that many of you will be desperately awaiting the day you get to flee
reproduce what people have been doing for centuries. Speaking, reading,
campus and gap to somewhere a little less Hamilton and a little more French
writing, picking a cat out of a million photos. It’s our deep need to be
Riviera. If you are one of those more adventurous souls, then I am here to
understood. We all want voice activated TV’s, cell phones that can order
encourage you on your quest to see the world. Oh and to warn you not to do
our favourite pizza just because we said we were hungry and the ability to
some of the dumb shit that I’ve done whilst travelling. I’m not going to claim that
turn the jug on just by yelling at it… maybe that last one's just me. All these
I’ve scoured every millimetre of the Earth and trekked through exotic rainforests
things come back to language and our ability to teach something how we
like a small, athletically challenged, female version of Bear Gryllz (I added the
communicate. If you’ve ever spent time with a toddler, you’ll know it takes a
‘z’ cause I like to imagine Bear has a rap alter ego). But I have been fortunate
million times saying a word for them to get it right.
enough to have a little geeze around Europe and have stayed at my fair share of
“Cat, cat, cat.” Believe it or not, this is the same process that ‘Google Deepmind’
backpackers: bunking with 15 of my closest absolute fucking strangers.
uses for their machine learning. Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy got it right
That’s probably the first thing you should know about travelling: it isn’t all
with ‘Deep Thought’, though I’m not smart enough to comprehend 42. Repeat
mimosas and macaroons. There will be times where you’ll have to rough it.
the same process over and over ‘til we get it right.
You might have to get up at three in the morning to make your flight because
Late 2015, an AI by the name of AlphaGo managed to defeat Fan Hui (a professional go player) five to zero. This is big news as it’s the first time a computer has beaten a pro at such a complex game. One step closer to our robot overlords.
you irrationally bought discounted tickets that no other sane person wanted. You may find yourself lost in a foreign city with a whopping 8% remaining on your phone, and a dead portable charger because not only are you too useless to charge your phone, you are also too useless to charge the charger. And though backpackers can provide the perfect environment for meeting
Why should I be so interested? Well, have you ever used Siri or Cortana
new and exciting people, you may find yourself getting two hour's sleep
only to be disappointed by their capability? These are supposed to be our
thanks to that couple rooting in the bunk above you (or maybe that’s you, ya
AI companions but they’re lacking when it comes to human interaction. It all
cheeky devil). But believe it or not, all these things add to the fun of travelling.
comes down to language. An AI can grasp the meaning of a simple language,
You get thrown in the deep end and by surviving, really get to learn more
and even speak back to you, but it is limited by its literal interpretation of your
about yourself.
question. A cat is typically a furry animal humans keep as pets.
One of my golden rules for travelling is that you should try to completely
Without a larger context, how is a machine to understand that a cat is a living
immerse yourself in the culture. Try the local foods, even if liver pâté isn’t your
breathing thing? Where better to learn the human language then the largest
jam, at least you can tell all the locals when your pissed and they’ll froth you.
database of human conversations — social media. Each time you update your
One of my travelling companions also recommends trying the local cuisine,
Facebook status, post to your blog or send an email, Google is customising
but I don’t think she was referring to the food. Get to know the history of the
your dictionary based on what words go next to each other. With over 900
places/monuments you visit, so that you’re not blankly staring at the Notre
million monthly users on Facebook Messenger alone, that’s a lot of context.
Dame wondering what its significance is. But my best advice is give travelling your absolute all. Be open to everything because the result is so rewarding.
27
NEXUS MAGAZINE Columns
hari kOrero YWRC GENDER-PAY GAP FOR DUMMIES
HARI KŌRERO TE WAIORA
YOUNG WORKERS' RESOURCE CENTRE
RANGIPARE NGAROPO
So, I’m just gonna go ahead and assume that most of you have heard a
“1738 - YAAAAAH BABY! So hey wassupp hello…”
whisper or two this year, that the gender pay gap is the worst it’s been in
Though that opening whakatauki is the epitome of irrelevant, the information
about 10 years — but what does that actually mean?
that follows isn’t. And neither are you, you avid Nexus reader, you. Hopefully
If I’m working at Macca’s earning $15.25/hour (the current adult minimum
though, Fetty Wap’s trademark line got your attention.
wage), and my male co-worker is also earning $15.25/hour, then where’s the
You’ve heard it before, you’ll hear it again — “Te Waiora, he whānau, he
inequality? Despite research undertaken by the Ministry of Innovation and
āhurutanga”.
Employment saying that many graduates are coming out of tertiary study to
In short, Te Waiora is a Māori Students association on campus (which isn’t
similar salaries, the current pay gap between men and women is still around 11%.
only for Māori students btw) Which promotes all round Māori excellence,
That means that women in New Zealand are earning about $8000/year less than men. Look deeper and the research starts to trickle down theories that women are overlooked for top-paying roles. Or are more likely to be in low paid trades like beauty therapy/hairdressing, or administration; and Government
whakawhanaungatanga and offers a sense of ‘home away from home’ in a University setting. Te Waiora doesn’t discriminate, in fact, we celebrate diversity, so no matter if you’re mā, pāngo, kōwhai, or kākāriki, the more blended, the better the flavour.
(under) funded industries like teaching, nursing, aged-care, or caring for the
Every cultural hour (Wednesday 1–2pm) we provide a space for our members
disabled. Which begs the question: why are these roles undervalued? Across
to get together, mix and mingle, sing waiata, with the main objective being
the labour market industries populated by women, like aged-care, are valued
to nurture a sense of belonging while here at The University of Waikato. Te
less than male-dominated industries like corrections and that is simply unfair.
Waiora are also working on providing more frequent Study Wānanga, because
Apparently men are also more likely to be looking for opportunities to be their
though fun is ultimately, fun.. Mahia te mahi, kia pāti ai te pāti!
own well-paid bosses, or are particularly savvy when it comes to negotiating a higher pay-rate in the contract signing process.
Speaking of Pāti, one of the social events we’ve hosted this year was the ‘Around The World’ mystery tour. Which conveniently landed on the week
This basically says to me that in 2016, somewhere along the line women still
that all lecturers dread — Orientation Week. A whānau flat crawl, where every
aren’t given the tools they require to negotiate with, work for, and compete
location depicted a particular country. It was EPIC! The Epicness continued
with men. Then there is the expectation that women are homemakers, taking
at our Easter Karaoke Social, where the song-birds were out in magnitudes
time from work to have and raise children – another essential role that goes
fighting for 4 Ferrero Rocher easter eggs. And with State of Origin advancing,
unpaid in society.
as our next social event. So come to cultural hour, and stay tuned, avid reader..
And this shocked me to read on the Ministry for Women website (www. women.govt.nz), there is still an idea of “the appropriateness of different types of work for women and men”. This outrages me. And is surely discriminatory?! There isn’t a quick fix for gender pay inequality, but it starts with raising awareness and having the conversation. And now that we have, what are we going to do about it? I leave you with the wise words of one James Brown: “This is a man’s world, but it would be nothing without a woman, or a girl.”
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The most fulfilling moment as a member of Te Waiora, was last Wednesday; when multiple students became masters, threw their graduation caps, received the most expensive piece of paper, and proved that Māori can do it. Old and new members come together to support, and seeing one graduation encourages you, yourself, to succeed. With those words, “Whaia te iti kahurangi, ki te tuohu koe me he maunga teitei.”
Cooking for Students NEXUS MAGAZINE
PAK ’N SAVE HEAD CHEF TERIYAKI CHICKEN INGREDIENTS 500g Chicken Breast – Chopped 1 Onion – Wedges 2 Cups Chopped Vegetables (I used courgette, red capsicum, and green beans) ½ Cup Soy Sauce 5 tbsp Honey 1 tsp Seaseme oil or Sake (rice wine)
METHOD 1. In a bowl, stir the soy sauce, honey, seaseme oil and ginger together to make a marinade. 2. Place cut chicken in marinade. Stir, cover and leave to marinate for at least 20 minutes. 3. Heat oil in a large pan or wok. Add chicken but keep the marinade. Cook until golden, stirring occasionally.
1 tsp Crushed Ginger
4. Remove chicken from pan and add vegetables. Cook.
Rice
5. Remove veges and pour saved marinade into the pan. Bring to
Spring onion and seseme seeds to garnish (optional)
the boil until slightly thickened and a sauce is made.
Serves 4
6. Add chicken and veges to combine all ingredients together
For the lazy, you could use a pre-made teriyaki sauce
7. Serve over cooked rice and garnish with green onion and
to make this recipe even easier and faster
seseme seeds. Enjoy!
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Snap nexusmag your shenanigans! The best snap each week wins a voucher from our mates at BurgerFuel. Claim it from the Nexus office in SUB.
WINNER
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Her hobbies include riding — both horses and "the odd good looking guy". She had so many criteria for appearance that we glazed over and just matched her up with the first available guy. He appears to have basic hygiene and grasp of cliched expressions for describing nervousness. At least we got through one Blind Date write up without the phrase "fashionably late" being used?
SHE SAID
HE SAID
Downing two shots to calm the nerves I arrived a classy 5 minutes late,
Going into the evening I couldn’t help but feel butterflies. All day I’d been
as advised by the previous Nexus Blind Date goers. I arrived to see a tall,
anxious to know who I would meet and what they would think of me.
groomed, well dressed dude which ticked all my boxes. Conversation
Finally, the moment came and I was sitting in the bank. My waiter, Fabio,
flowed from religion to ex girlfriends. We ordered quickly he got the burger
sidled up to me and offered me a drink before I began to internalize my
I got the chicken breast. What a lucky dude getting to look at three breasts
goals and motivations for the night.
for the night. On another note the breast was tender and moist, just how I like them.
As soon as my date arrived I tried to make a good impression. We bantered on throughout a couple of drinks and soon we ordered our meals. I chose
We shared a taxi home he jumped in the front leaving me to occupy the back
the chicken burger and she had chicken breast. I think I did most of the
seat all on my lonesome. But being a great dude he stopped the taxi and got
talking for the first half hour or so, just so she wouldn’t feel bored with me
in the back seat with me. It was dark, giving him the perfect opportunity to
and my poorly masked chicken breath burps.
tick my box, but to my disappointment no move was made. Maybe I would have got more action if I sat in the front with the taxi driver ;)
There came a moment for me to share a piece of my soul with her. I stumbled over my words like I was speaking a foreign language. This
The offer of movies at his was made, but being a classy slut I told him
sparked her decision to also share a vulnerability which helped me to feel
I wasn’t going to stay the night - this dampened his mood and I was
at ease. We shared a cab back home. I wanted to stay with her longer so
quickly dropped off at my flat. Mother nature wasn’t on my side either but
while still in the cab I invited her to come into my flat, and she agreed,
I wouldn’t have minded a bit of lip action. Guess I won't have the chance
but some part of me was in doubt. I awkwardly suggested that maybe it
to see his yellow Hawaiian shirt anytime soon. Nothing sexual about this
would be better If we went our separate ways for the night. She cordially
date, sorry to disappoint, but I will be on Tinder soon, so well buffed and
agreed and stepped out of the car. I stepped through my front door alone,
groomed guys come at me.
yet relieved to have made it home the same man who left.
NEXUS MAGAZINE Puzzles
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How many words can you make from these letters? The letters must touch horizontally, vertically or diagonally and cannot be used more than once in a word.
LANGUAGE
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T
26
2
24
10
7
8
4
1
3
5 25
9
4
4
14
T
6 16
22
9
7
7
SLITHERLINK
8
10
7 13
1
2
5
HARD
Each letter in the puzzle is represented by a number 1 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 26. Crack the code to solve it.
23
1
6
6
CODE CRACKER 12
3
6 3
6
8
2
2 5
6
1
MEDIUM
23
7
7
3
4
EASY
8
3
9 5
1
6
7
9
3
9
19
1 4
1
9 4
10 7
3
12
12
26
T
10
9 12
11
T
T
loop. The numbers indicate how many lines
14
must surround each number and the loop
2
15
3
16
4
17
5
18
6
19
7
20
8
21
9
22
10
23
11
24
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25
13
26
must never cross itself.
0
2
2
2
1
2
2 2
2
2
2
1
2
2
2
2
3
2
U
1 2
0
3
TRIVIAL What is the only food that does not spoil? Which animal can go the longest without water? What role was Albert Einstein offered in 1952?
Puzzles NEXUS MAGAZINE
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Listen Communicate
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Persuade Convince
Discuss
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HOROSCOPES CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 22 — JANUARY 19) Mercury is still in retrograde, and I still have no idea what that means.
CANCER (JUNE 21 — JULY 22) If your STMG tutor has been acting strangely, the stars suggest there may be surprise test next week.
AQUARIUS (JANUARY 20 — FEBRUARY 18)
LEO (JULY 23 — AUGUST 22)
Don’t drink the coffee this morning, it’s poisoned. – Future Dwight.
The stars shine favourably upon Hamilton this week, you’ll feel extra lucky when you try and get lucky.
PISCES (FEBRUARY 19 — MARCH 20)
VIRGO (AUGUST 23 — SEPTEMBER 22)
You’re looking to increase income, as Jupiter puts pressure on your
The defining taste of your university career, Waikato Draught, was
economic sense. Kidding, we know that’s your mum.
made in the first ever brewery to be owned by a woman.
ARIES (MARCH 21 — APRIL 19)
LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 23 — OCTOBER 22)
Like Greek god Ares, your sign has a sporting affinity. As Paddon wins
Office equipment is out to get you this week; the stapler has a taste
WRC & BCs top T20 you will hopefully know wtf these acronyms mean.
for blood and will be back for your fingers.
TAURUS (APRIL 20 — MAY 20)
SCORPIO (OCTOBER 23 — NOVEMBER 21)
Feeling the cold? Tinfoil hats are a great way to keep the heat in your
Neptune is visible on the horizon, just like the end of semester is
head. Plus, Illuminati.
now too.
GEMINI (MAY 21 — JUNE 20)
SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 22 — DECEMBER 21)
You’re an absolute gem, Gemini. Never change.
In no way do the stars suggest that you should take Tuesday off, buy a tinnie, and watch Space Jam. In no way. 33
Hillcrest - Shop 9, Hillcrest Shopping Centre, Cambridge Road, Hamilton 3216 Davies Corner – Unit 2, 303 Clarkin Road, Fairfield, Hamilton 3214
dominos.co.nz 0800 30 40 50 MOBILE & ONLINE
ORDERING SITE
For a Lot of Flipping Fun 42 Sunshine Ave, Te Rapa PH: 07 850 4222
Fo r mo re water saving tip
s visit
A. Shower
C. WAshing maChine*
The average shower sucks about 14 litres of hot water every minute. A 20 minute shower uses 280 L of hot water. This is the same as one and a half baths! If five flatmates cut their shower time in half you could save about $122 each month in power. The silver bullet for the hot water vampire is short showers, great for water saving, great for flat shower queues and great for saving money.
You can put the washing machine monster on a diet and save a load of water and some money off your power bill too! • Cut its comfort, choose the cool cycle and save about $100 a year • Wait for a full load before feeding the monster • Eco cycle is like paleo for this beast, keep it trim *based on 5 loads/week
ANSWERS:
a. Shower
B. TOILET
C. wAshing mAchinE
B. TOILET
a. Shower
wAshing C. mA chinE