Nexus 2017 Issue 21 by Nexus Magazine

FREE STUDENT MAGAZINE

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Pot, Prison, Privacy: It’s Election Season — Page 04 Why We Need Pride — Page 17 Make The University Great Again Part 2 — Page 22

NEXUS ISSUE 21 11TH - 15TH SEPTEMBER 2017 CO-EDITORS Bronwyn Laundry Lyam Buchanan editor@nexusmag.co.nz

1 4 NEWS

EDITORIAL

Celebrity Status

• Pot, Prison, Privacy: It’s Election Season • Ardern Pledges to Decriminalise Abortion • Lecturer Labeled Islamophobic • TL;LR • News in Numbers • The Diminutive Post • Top Ten

MANAGING EDITOR James Raffan james@nexusmag.co.nz

DESIGN Vincent Owen design@nexusmag.co.nz

DEPUTY EDITOR

17 FEATURE

Why We Need Pride

20 CENTREFOLD 22 FEATURE

Photography by Alessandra Tane

Make the University Great Again Part 2

Jennie-Louise Kendrick jen@nexusmag.co.nz

24 FULL EXPOSURE 27 STUDENT EXPERIENCE

REVIEWS EDITOR

Interview with Dan Jones

Alexander Nebesky reviews@nexusmag.co.nz

CONTRIBUTORS John Robson Alessandra Tane Ria Bhogal Lia Mitchell

SPORTS

• Two Legs Good, Four Legs Bad

Tori Mitchell Cameron McRobie Rose Swears Conor Maxwell Simon Kay David Simes Jacqui Swney Waveney Russ Valerie Bianchi Julie Charlton Tom Featonby

OFFICES Ground Floor SUB, Gate One University of Waikato Knighton Road Hillcrest Hamilton 3216 Private Bag 3059

DISTRIBUTION Matthew Rae

30 COLUMNS

• Pass the AUX • Arts • Eco Emporium • The Morning After • Yam & Troy the Science Boys • WUG Life

Kate Lunn

Troy Anderson

• Puppet Master Politics • Club Spotlight: Orcball

13 ENTERTAINMENT 14 REVIEWS

• Video Game: ‘Life is Strange’ by Dontnod Entertainment • Stand Up: ‘Best Comedy Show on Earth Tour’ • TV: ‘The Deuce’ • Album: ‘Villains’ by Queens of the Stone Age

37 SNAPPED 39 BLIND DATE 40 PUZZLES

Editorial — Pānui Ētita

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Celebrity Status When Chlöe Swarbrick first came to campus, amid her social media peak and her unsuccessful, yet high profile, candidacy for Auckland Mayor, people flocked to the Village Green to get a glimpse of the legendary pantsuit. When Prime Minister Bill English visited campus, 30 people came to get a sausage from him. Including his security detail. When ol’ mate Winston Peters dragged himself on the campaign trail, a group of a couple hundred cheered him on, (for some pretty fucked statements, nonetheless). When Chlöe Swarbrick returned to campus two weeks ago after the publicity surrounding her died down and the Green party had weathered the recent storm of scandal, 20 people and a drum circle showed up. Yet, when Jacinda came to town last week, a couple thousand rallied. Her press secretary said they’d been mobbed everywhere they went and they’d been told to bring her in the back entrance. We were allotted 10 minutes to speak with her before she had to leave for the Green. It was hectic. People waved signs, cheered, asked for selfies. The press were there. Lyam got interviewed. So it begs the question, did the crowd show up to

Jacinda’s campaign event because she’s trending on social media? We already know the number of 18-24 year olds enrolled to vote in Hamilton East is abysmal (50.8%), were the entire voting population there? Or do we only care about political figures when there’s some type of publicity surrounding them? Winston gets the crowds because he’s controversial, did Jacinda get them because she’s new? Or are young people just fickle beings who only give a fuck if it pops up on their newsfeed? Selective activism has been rampant since as long as the internet (Kony 2012 anyone?). We have a tendency to jump on whatever bandwagon that will make us feel good about ourselves, and then turn back to being apathetic and mindless meme scrollers the rest of the time. But if last Wednesday was indicative of youth actually caring about politics for once, even if it is just for a fleeting internet moment, we’ll let it slide. Fucking vote. ♦

— Lyam & Bron

Uni News — Pitopito Korero

U N I

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N E W S

Annual Frank Sargeson Memorial Lecture Award-winning writer Adam Dudding will be presenting HEARTS AND LETTERS: How I decided to read 10,000 pages of literary chitchat from decades past, and am a better person for it at the 15th Annual Frank Sargeson Memorial Lecture, Tuesday 19 September. Lecture begins at 5.30pm with light refreshments to follow from 6.30pm. All welcome, S.1.04, S Block, Hamilton campus. Code of Student Conduct The University is committed to providing a safe environment. A draft Code of Student Conduct has been developed to give clear guidance on the standards of conduct expected by the University and to refer students, staff and other members of the University community to the procedures for making, investigating and resolving complaints of misconduct. Feedback on the proposed Code of Student Conduct is invited to the University’s Manager Policy and Governance at policy@ waikato.ac.nz by Friday 6 October 2017. Make Your Summer Count Make your summer count this year by volunteering through our Employability Plus Programme. Gain volunteer experience, get work ready and develop career skills. Get involved and earn recognition by visiting waikato.ac.nz/go/epp.

We’re Hiring! Interested in being a Residential Assistant (RA) or Senior Residential Assistant (SRA) next year? You’ll get to live and work at the Halls on campus, and help new residents adjust to university life and living away from home. Call 07 838 4084 or email accom@waikato.ac.nz for an application form. Applications close 11 September. The World’s Best Are Coming, Are You? In November, Hamilton will host two blockbuster matches in this year’s Rugby League World Cup. Pacific rivals Samoa and Tonga will face off on November 4 before the New Zealand Kiwis come to town to take on Tonga on November 11. Student tickets start from just $10 so get in quick! For more information on the tournament, head to RLWC2017.com. Beat the Rush, Vote Early You can vote early on the Hamilton campus.TC.2.27 (FEDU) will be an advanced voting place from 1115 and 18-22 September from 9am-5pm each day. The room is next to the Gateway Building, Gate 5, Hillcrest Road. Anyone can vote early. If you’re not enrolled to vote you must do so quickly. You can enrol on site at the advanced voting place, or register online at elections.org.nz, freephone 0800 36 76 56, go into any PostShop, or freetext your name and address to 3676.

Go to iWaikato or Student eNews for more information and other need-to-knows. 03

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News — Pitopito Korero

Pot, Prison, Privacy: It’s Election Season Lyam Buchanan From Paula Bennett’s recently retracted comments on gang members having fewer rights to National’s plan to send all serious youth offenders to bootcamps, the rights and rehabilitation of people who have been in this system from an early age has been a massive talking point in this election. We sat down with expert Tony Lorigan, convicted criminal and former prisoner who has since published a thesis, Sex, Drugs and Smashing Skulls: A qualitative narrative of how masculinity can be socially constructed within a gang environment, highlighting his views on crime and punishment. What are your views on Paula’s comment that some New Zealanders such as serious criminals and gang members, have fewer human rights? “That’s just absolute rubbish, they live a different lifestyle. Once you start categorising people by the way they live in the terms of being allowed human rights it’s a very very slippery slope.” “Gang members are still loving fathers, they’re still people. Do they do horrible stuff? Yeah they do, but actually we all do horrible stuff. It just depends on what your definition of what’s horrible and terrible.” “I’m nearly 40 now, but when I was 17 I went to apply for a gun license, I had no criminal convictions at that stage but I was denied a gun 04

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license on my association, I hadn’t actually done anything wrong. Did the cops know who I was? Yeah of course they did, but they hadn’t caught me for anything yet. Like I said, no convictions to my name, but the people I was living with and my immediate family both having done armed robberies meant I wasn’t allowed a gun license.” “When I was a drug dealer I always had a handgun under my seat, none of it was registered to me and if I lost that one I could get another one. There’s so many guns in this country that they can’t just say ‘because you’re a gang member you can’t hold a gun license’. Now if you have convictions just like any Joe Average you can’t hold one too and that’s fine, but you can’t just start implementing things on me for what I might do or what you think I’m gonna do. It’s a blatant disregard for human rights as we’ve alluded to already.”

↑ TO N Y LO R I G A N

↑ PA U L A B E N N E T T

News — Pitopito Korero

Vox Pops 1. Do gangs deserve the right to privacy? 2. Do you believe there should be a drug reform? 3. Should bootcamps be implemented for young offenders? 4. Is there a crime that you’d take someone’s human rights away for? Tom, Sociology, 22 1. Yeah, no problem with that. 2. Yes in terms of decriminalising it. It should be a health issue not a crime issue. 3. Nah not at all. It’s been proven it doesn’t work. 4. No. Rights are fundamental, no matter what.

Courtney, BA, 20 1. That’s a hard one. It depends what they’re up to. Not if they’re up to bad things. 2. Don’t really care, no opinion. 3. Yeah, maybe. 4. No, everyone needs human rights even if they’ve done something bad.

Tyson, Chemical Engineering, 19 1. Depends, I don’t think gangs should even exist. 2. I’m not against it or for it, no opinion really. 3. Yeah I think so, a little discipline would help. 4. I’d probably say murder.

Luke, Civil Engineering, 20 1. Yeah, everyone deserves the right to privacy as long as they don’t harm others in that time. 2. No, people use it for the wrong reasons. Medical use is fine, not recreational. 3. Yeah I reckon it’s a good idea, I saw it on the news. 4. If any it would be murder. Jamie, BMS, 19 1. Yeah, it’s basic human rights. If they’re just a gang member they’re usually pretty innocent and really family orientated. 2. Yap. Only if people want to change themselves should there be funding for rehab, if people don’t wanna stop then there’s no point. 3. Yip. Serious offences should get more than juvie. 4. Pedophilia, first degree murder and necrophilia.

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Paula Bennett’s argument is that we should just be able to conduct a raid without a warrant on residencies with a likelihood to contain illegal firearms, drugs etc “Well that’s just ridiculous, once again you’re working on speculation and assumption. Just because you think it’s there doesn’t give you the right to come on to my property. Now I’m guilty, prove myself innocent. Once you start being able to raid houses without justifiable cause or reason where does it stop? She’s putting out stuff to make people feel better without actually doing anything”. “Would this stretch to a gang members mothers house for example? I’d stash stuff at my Mum’s house back in the past. If a gang member lived down the road from their mum, does that give them the right to search that house too? Where does it stop?” National recently announced ‘Boot camps for youth offenders’, you’ve mentioned your chequered past so do you think something like this would’ve helped? “No. They tried this back when I was young. They used to call it corrective training, the reason they stopped doing it was because it doesn’t work. You’re dealing with people who won’t conform. They might conform to a degree and it might help the odd person but what it did was send them out fitter, stronger and able to be more dangerous. Unless someone wants to better their life and help themselves you’re not gonna make them, some of these kids don’t want to. They stopped CT because it was having a detrimental effect. You go there you meet more people and get connected, I might go there for drug dealing and someone’s a car thief and someone else is a whatever, we sit and talk now when I leave I know how to steal cars, I know how to do burglaries and I’m really fit and really strong.” We’ve had two political debates, both leaders have stumbled over it. What are your thoughts on a drug reform, the legalisation and decriminalisation of marijuana as a class C drug, using the money for drug treatment and rehabilitation. “Absolutely. Marijuana is the bottom of the pile, if we’re talking about drugs I’m thinking meth, ecstasy. Marijuana doesn’t even come into my mind, it’s just a plant. If we legalise it we can actually make money off it and this money can be reinvested into rehabilitation. If you look at all the countries with relaxed laws around this you can see that use didn’t shoot up, it didn’t cause problems. It took the monopoly off the black market and regulated it, made it cheaper and easier. It’s caused less social problems.” ♦ 05

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News — Pitopito Korero

Ardern Pledges to Decriminalise Abortion Kate Lunn Labour leader Jacinda Ardern has committed to changing the law on abortion if she becomes Prime Minister. “It shouldn’t be in the Crimes Act,” she said at the Newshub Leaders Debate last Monday. “This is about everyone being able to make their own decision.” “I want women who want access to be able to have it as a right.” Prime Minister Bill English, a staunch Catholic, believes that the current law and practice is “broadly acceptable” and was working. “I do support the law as it stands. It is rightly a conscience issue for Parliament. We would not make it a party political issue but if the changes came before the Parliament I’d be opposed to liberalising the law,” English said. English said that any decision on the issue made by Parliament would be made by a conscience vote. This would allow MPs to vote freely based on their person views, rather than voting as a unified party. Following English’s comments, National MP Nikki Kaye said that she is in support of removing abortion from the Crimes Act. Kaye told Newshub last week that the current law is “archaic” and that she would vote for change if the issue came before Parliament. Abortion is technically a crime in New Zealand. For an abortion to be legally carried out, two certified medical practitioners must deem the abortion medically necessary or justified. Access to abortion is governed by the Crimes Act 1961, and the Contraception, Sterilisation and Abortion Act 1977. Although there have 06

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been calls for the law to be liberalised, it has not changed since 1977. The Abortion Supervisory Committee, a Government-appointed committee, told MPs earlier this year that the current wording in New Zealand’s abortion law is offensive and that not updating it is an “indictment.” Legal grounds to justify an abortion include serious danger to the physical or mental health of the mother, or the possibility of having a mentally disabled child. While sexual violation itself is not considered a ground in itself to justify an abortion, it may still be taken into account. Last year, nearly 13,000 abortions were performed in New Zealand and accounted for 18 per cent of known pregnancies in New Zealand. Of the abortions performed in New Zealand, 98 per cent are performed under the grounds of serious danger to the mental health of the woman. In 2016, 252 “not justified abortion” certificates were issued. ♦

↑ N I K K I K AY E

↑ BILL ENGLISH DURING THE SECOND LEADERS D E B AT E

News — Pitopito Korero

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Lecturer Labeled Islamophobic Bronwyn Laundry

↑ R AY M O N D R I C H A R D S

↑ I M AG E O F S I K H E M P LOY E E S H A R E D BY Z E N E RGY O N FAC E B O O K

A history lecturer here at Waikato University has come under fire for comments made on Facebook that have been branded as anti-Islam. Dr Raymond Richards, an American history and religion lecturer, made comments on a post shared on Facebook by Z Energy about diversity in the workplace. Richards’ comments suggested that Muslim workers should not be hired because they pray five times a day. The comment read, “Who needs employees if they stop work five times per day to talk to an imaginary being?” The comment was posted on a photo of a Sikh, and responders criticised Richards immediately for not knowing the difference between Sikh and Muslim. Complaints were made to the University by offended members of the public. Richards stood by his comment, saying it had nothing to do with his job as a lecturer and asserting that he did know the difference between Sikh and Muslim. “I did not confuse Sikh and Muslim. My comment was on the original post, which was about diversity, not on the photo.” “Religion is fair game. Religion is an enemy of education. I’m speaking as an individual, expressing my own personal opinion.” “I think it’s very important people exercise their freedom of speech and not be intimidated,” Richards said. He denied that his comments were racially insensitive, stating, “Islam is not a race, it’s a religion. Some people say racism when you

criticise a religion and they need to understand religion is an idea. It’s superstition, it’s not a race.” He later stated that he had deleted his comment off Facebook, “because I do not want extremists coming after me.” In response to the complaints surrounding the issue, the University’s communications director, Alice Clements issued a statement on behalf of the University, “The University of Waikato does not condone language or actions that perpetuate hate, discrimination or harmful stereotypes. We are an institution that values diversity and have clear expectations of staff conduct. We will be examining this matter carefully.” ♦

News — Pitopito Korero

TL;LR

Too Long; Lyam Read Nexus interpets news headlines so you don’t have to. “Dogs proven to be more desirable than the average man.” — My girlfriend’s only with me for my dog. The first few dates with me and my girlfriend involved my dog. As soon as he wasn’t along for the ride, things just weren’t the same.

“Suitable replacement for Bill English steps into spotlight.” — ‘Sober up,’ official urges Kenyan president, who’s being called ‘commander in drinks’. Kenyan President Uhuru Kenyatta tells Supreme Court “crooks” he’s still in charge.

“I blame Invercargill.” — New Zealand named third most beautiful country in the world. Canada’s “raw beauty and majestic landscapes” sneaked into second, with Scotland claiming the top prize.

“Not even the DHB can say no to a good Briscoes sale.” — Wooden spoons and domestic sieves part of Waikato surgeons’ toolkit. These items being used in cardiac surgery at Waikato Hospital.

“Helen Clark describes the joys of her recent travels.” — Another day, another drunk brawl on a plane. Irish low-cost carrier Ryanair is again calling for a change in drinking laws at airports after yet another drunken brawl was caught on camera.

“Siri’s a bad bitch, she’d bomb the fuck outta Guam if she wanted.” — Artificial intelligence more likely cause of World War III than North Korea - Elon Musk

News in Numbers $82m

15 year old

3 issues

80kmh

45kgs

40m

crackdown on methamphetamine use and supply announced by National Party.

of Nexus left once you’ve finished the glorious magazine you’re currently reading

lost by Pokeno mum after two years of cutting out the crap.

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breaks the world record for solving a Rubik’s cube after completing it in 4.69.

speed limit on Northwestern Motorway drives motorists moderately insane.

beer carrying world record broken with 29 stein effort in Germany.

The Diminutive Post

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News — Pitopito Korero

NEXUS MAGAZINE

TOP 10 Young Driver Proud of How Easily They Have Mastered Control of Their Windscreen Wipers “I know all the settings, sometimes the rain comes and goes really fast but I’m able to switch the speed to suit accordingly AND focus on where I’m driving.” Restricted driver chuffed with their automatic motor vehicle skills. “I can even take my lights off full beam when there’s oncoming traffic!”

The University’s communications team have recently stepped up their social media presence with the introduction of their phenomenal Snapchat Persona, ‘Randal the Jandal’. Here at Nexus we take all out queues from University comms peeps, so here are our first ten failed attempts at a Nexus Snapchat Mascot. 10. Jesus the Tetanus Nail. All the fun of a jandal with none of the pesky Mexican border wall. Could be pronounced another way to give it a crucifixion vibe. Not any better but different. 9. Peter the Pitching Fork. Peter’s adventures mainly take him around Cameron and Hogan where he can be found having a smashing good time with people’s car windows. 8. Nicola Smith.

Government Officials Find Direct Correlation Between Doing the Mahi and Getting the Treats “It’s disheartening to see so many young bucks out here expecting the treats without really cracking into some solid mahi”. Recipient of hard earned treats speaks up about the challenges they faced getting to this point. “It’s simple really, I did the mahi and in return got the treats”.

7. Andy the Apple Bong. Would need to be replaced every two days ‘til we eventually invest in Randy the Roach Clip. 6. Corbyn the Cockroach. Along with his horde of buddies currently causing mayhem at a Greensboro flat near you. 5. Dave the Discarded Condom. Skulking around the K block toilets because English students are classy. 4. Paula the Plagiariser. World renowned group chat creator providing engineering students with more than the bare minimum. 3. William the Wet Towel. About as useful as an advocate for the ACT party.

Occasional Town DJ Genuinely Convinced They’re a Local Celebrity “Did you catch my set last weekend? It was way too loose, honestly the filthiest drops all night”. Nexus correspondent overhears amateur disk jockey attempt to flirt with uninterested female. “Just tell the bouncer you’re with me and you’ll get in for free, I could even get you up on stage if you’re keen? Do you think you could get some sweet Snaps on my story for me?”

2. Lenny the Light Bulb. Not one of those energy efficient ones either but the kind Callum the Crackhead will use on every third snapchat. 1. Braxton the Builder’s Apprentice. StudVille dropout desperately trying to make his life look somewhat enjoyable. ♦

NEXUS MAGAZINE

Sports — Hākinakina

Two Legs Good, Four Legs Bad Cameron McRobie A long standing debate within international sports scientists is: are humans supposed to run? Evolutionary evidence supports two arguments for humans; one that we’re similar to most other animals in the sense that we should walk everywhere and only sprint when absolutely necessary, from our hunter gatherer ancestors who used to walk stupidly long distances day after day. And two, that we were made for running marathon distances due to our upright posture. The marathon has increased in popularity a grunt-load over the last several years. The 2005 US Marathon Report stated that in 2000 there were 299,000 marathon finishers, that number had increased by 83,000 in 5 years and then again increased to 555,000 finishers by 2016. As the popularity of long distance running increases, reports of running injuries follow suit (surprise surprise). Scientific studies indicate that 60–65% of all runners experience some form of injury each year, but like hey – correlation doesn’t equal causation right? This begs the question: Are we actually meant to run, or are we a bunch of oxygen thieves who think ruining our knees makes us god-level healthy? Evolution suggests that humans are in fact the most suited beings on earth to long distance, high intensity running due to unique and efficient cooling and energy systems and superior biomechanics from running upright as opposed to on four legs like a dog or gazelle. Though we didn’t evolve specifically for running, over the last 200,000 years or so – homosapiens have evolved to harbour a larger chest cavity (supporting bigger lungs), more efficient oxygen delivery and the development of aerobic 10

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metabolic pathways. Basically for marathonlength distances, humans can outrun almost all other mammals - sometimes even horses in hotter conditions. This is backed up by African tribes of old who used to hunt animals that were suited to sprinting short distances fast then resting until these animals tired out and the tribe caught up by running consistently. Dating back donkeys years to when humans were hunter/gatherers, the Neanderthals would walk large distances to find fruit or track prey – only breaking into a run when they’d sprint to ambush it. This animal-esque walk run style (no, not like ol’ mate Bill English’s) as well as the much lower, more efficient energy use for walking - as opposed to long distance running gives professionals reason to believe that humans were in fact designed only for walking and sprinting. Given that humans can do pretty much anything with no worries – I’m of the belief that with a jog or two a week, anyone most Olympic Kenyan marathon runners should be able to clock up a two hour marathon in no time at all. The rest of us however should do whatever the fuck we want. I’m not the boss of you, I can’t and won’t ask you to run anywhere – be your own person and make that decision for yourself. Peace out. ♦

↑ WO R L D’ S FA S T E S T M A R AT H O N R U N N E R , D E N N I S K I M E T T O ( 2 : 0 2 : 5 7 AT T H E 2 0 1 4 B E R L I N M A R AT H O N )

↑ ELIUD KIPCHOGE, 2016 O LY M P I C M A R A T H O N G O L D MEDALLIST

Entertainment — Whakangahau

NEXUS MAGAZINE

ENTERTAINMENT Crush of the Week – Jojo She blessed us with some of the best breakup anthems, telling your fuckboi to “leave, get out”. Jojo starred in such tween movies as RV and Aquamarine, with a flip phone and a sweet fringe, she was the epitome of 2007. Jojo has released three albums, the latest being Mad Love in 2016, after coming out of a bad record deal. She is just as sassy as ever and is definitely worth a Spotify search.

Clickbait Moodboard: Weirdly Specific ASMR

Hottest to Nottest →→ Paula Bennett’s love for paninis and bowl lattes →→ Paddy Gower hosting the leader’s debate →→ Re: News →→ White Gold on Netflix →→ Businesses on Facebook trying to stay relevant with memes →→ Your flatmate’s girlfriend →→ The “swiggly” makeup trend →→ Not being eligible for Labour’s free tertiary fund →→ Where’s our annual Gloriavale special, TVNZ? →→ Mike Hosking →→ Personalised plates

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Reviews — Arotakenga

Video Games

Stand Up

Arotakenga Tākoro Ataata ‘Life is Strange’ by Dontnod Entertainment Review: Conor Maxwell

Arotakenga Whakahangareka ‘Best Comedy Show on Earth Tour’ Review: Simon Kay

-5 -4 -3 -2 -1 0 1 2 3 4 5

Last week saw the release of the first episode of Life is Strange: Before the Storm (a prequel to 2015’s Life is Strange), so if you haven’t played the original yet, now is the time to do so! Life is Strange is an episodic adventure centred around teenage heroine Max Caulfield; a small-town girl who has the bizarre ability to rewind time. From saving the life of Max’s best friend Chloe, to stopping a dudebro from falling off his skateboard, the player controls Max as she explores her new powers, and solves the world-shaking mysteries of Arcadia Bay. Life is Strange, like many of my favourite games, is heavily choice-centric, as often the choice of whether or not to rewind (and undo) events that have happened in Max and Chloe’s lives is left entirely up to the player. Every decision has consequences, and the ripples of these choices are felt throughout the narrative, as both time and Max’s psyche begin to steadily unravel. This is a moving game with characters you’ll quickly become invested in, but if I have one criticism, it’s that much of the humour and dialogue present in the game is incredibly dated. References to 80s horror movies and Max’s frequent use of “Shaka Brah”, amongst many other indiscretions, left me with the feeling that the writers of this game about teenagers were quite out of touch with how teenagers speak. I, of course, don’t have that problem. Swaggie. Dank me-mes. 420 ablaze. ♦

I was promised one thing at the start of the night. A show that would generate over 1000 laughs. I came here for one reason. To experience and receive these promised laughs. Brendhan Lovegrove’s quick wit and impersonations were unmatched throughout the night, but what can you expect from a veteran of the game. My pride in Hamilton took a severe beating but can you really blame him? 270 laughs. Melanie Bracewell had a short and sweet set but laughs weren’t as high as I expected. Having an audience who were more reaching their centennial than being a millennial you can’t really blame her. 120 laughs. Fricken Dangerous Bros should’ve focused on being a little less dangerous and a little bit funnier. Well thought out scenes and great timing contributed to the count, but they fell short with their stage presence between sketches. 100 laughs. Brendan Green provided a lovely insight into his life, however I wasn’t planning on getting so much life coaching at a comedy show. If you need any relationship tips, especially about talking dirty, then this is the man to go see. 105 laughs. The Fan Brigade are certainly worthy of their Best Newcomer award from the 2016 NZ International Comedy Festival combining the perfect mix of dialogue and musicality. 216 laughs. Eli Matthewson bought high energy to finish off the night. I’ll even forgive him for some distasteful talk of the dead. 200 laughs. They did it, 1001 laughs. Maybe not the best on earth, but the best way to spend a Saturday night in Hamilton. Brought to us by ‘Bestfoods’ I thought I would stick with the theme. It’s a 3.14 from me. ♦

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Reviews — Arotakenga

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Album

Arotakenga Whakaaturanga ‘The Deuce’ – Season 1, Episode 1 Review: David Simes

Arotakenga Pakaemi ‘Villains’ by Queens of the Stone Age Review: Troy Anderson

-5 -4 -3 -2 -1 0 1 2 3 4 5

Remember how HBO is a channel that doesn’t just revolve around Game of Thrones? Well this might be the show to jog your memory. From the creative mind of the HBO classics The Wire and Treme comes The Deuce. The Deuce tells the story of the legalisation and ensuing rise of the porn industry in New York beginning in the 1970s. It also focuses on the boom of the drug epidemic and the boom of the Real Estate market. Twin brothers, Vincent and Frankie Martino, played by James Franco in a bloody good double performance, become fronts for the Mob while operating out of Times Square. This is also the home of Candy, a sex worker played by Maggie Gyllenhaal, who turns towards this now-legal porn work. This show is a bloody stunner. The acting is wonderful, as is the set work, costuming and cinematography. The title sequence of this show is better than most of the shit out there currently. The best thing though, for me anyway, was the sheer realism invested in the story. Through all the different components, the real grit of New York and the drug and sex trade is shown. And it’s nice to have some characters with some god-damn personality built in. Every frame feels real. There are no fire breathing dragons here, although I’m sure there’s a bit of a burning sensation. It’s sad that The Deuce won’t get the widespread audience it deserves. But it’s got great potential and I hope it’s the next big HBO show. ♦

The new Queens of the Stone Age album is groovy as fuck. I don’t think I’ve ever heard such a danceable rock album that didn’t suck. It’s bizarre. The frontman Josh Homme (who’s still looking and sounding like he’s come straight out of the 50s) worked with producer Mark Ronson on this album. This man has worked with the likes of Bruno Mars and Adele which might explain the upbeat nature of this release. This album is most similar to the likes of Songs for the Deaf from 2002. It’s filled to the brim with catchy, yet somewhat metal-sounding guitar riffs, incredibly solid and dynamic drumming, and some powerful vocals from Josh Homme. This album has some quite notable Pink Floyd inspiration, but it’s not so noticeable as to overpower the feel of these tracks, it is still very much QOTSA. It runs right up to the borderline of becoming a parody of itself, of the classic tracks, while staying very much within that boundary and giving us a fresh and unique take on the classic sound. I’ve never been much of vocals man. I’m all about instrumentation and know about 5% of the lyrics to my favourite music so I can’t provide much insight there. That being said, this would be a pretty shitty review if I didn’t give it a mention. The entire idea behind this album, Villains, is a basic one, it’s not about political bullshit, not about Trump being elected, no. The term villains is a reference to the unseen negative influences on each individual’s life, whether that be a physical manifestation of a villain or the universe itself just giving you a jolly good slap across the face. It’s a goody, give it a listen aye. ♦

WHY WE NEED

PRIDE Tori Mitchell Art by Lia Mitchell

NEXUS MAGAZINE

Feature — Kupu Whakaatu

A lot of people ask the question ‘Why do we even need a Pride Week? Gays are already allowed to get married.’ Well, imagine this: You’re out with your significant other. You’re not doing anything fancy, just lunch, but it’s a pretty busy day, and there’s a lot of people around. Your partner says something sweet, so you reply with a kiss, but before you lean in, you have to check around you to see who is looking. You have to check all the faces, and make sure none of them are watching you with disgust or anger in their eyes. You have to check that it’s safe to kiss the person that you love. This week Tori Mitchell writes about Pride. Why do we need a Pride Week? Because we still have a long way to go. The queer community isn’t one small group, but a diverse society around the world, filled with people who face struggles every day simply for being who they are, and loving who they love. Pride events are about the visibility of the queer community, and are a space to be accepted when they may not feel like they belong anywhere else. Pride is often especially important for those who are new to the community. It gives them the opportunity to explore their identity safely, without fear or shame, and lets them know that there’s nothing wrong with being part of the LGBTQA+ spectrum. Pride is a place of solace. On the other hand though, Pride is also a place for those who have been in the community for years, to acknowledge how they fought to get us to where we are today. Pride is a way for the queer community to celebrate what we’ve accomplished, but also a way for us to continue our fight. We may have marriage equality, but trans* individuals are still forced to use the wrong bathrooms. Our sexualities may not be considered (in most places) to be a mental illness anymore, but conversion therapy still exists around the world. Pride also gives the queer community much needed visibility. It is beyond important for those in the community, particularly the younger members, to see LGBTQA+ individuals around them, being proud and being themselves. Seeing people in the spotlight, like Laverne Cox, Ellen Page, or George Takei, who’re famous and queer, people like us who live their lives happily, give us hope. There are more and

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more characters like us on TV and movies, or in books, characters like Callie Torres from Grey’s Anatomy, Lena and Stef from The Fosters, Root and Shaw from Person of Interest, and pretty much everyone from Sense8 and Orange is the New Black. Despite this, unfortunately, there are still many people who complain when queer characters are introduced, as if it’s more realistic for every single person to be a cis-heterosexual. The importance of visibility is often downplayed, but can you imagine watching a TV show, or reading a book, where there is no character that you can relate to? Having queer characters going through queer storylines and portraying queer experiences allows us to see ourselves and our stories, and know that we’re not alone. It’s empowering. Pride means so many different things to so many different people, so instead of just listing things, I thought I’d ask some people around Hamilton what Pride means to them. “It means not denying who I am to make others more comfortable, being able to say ‘this is me and fuck you if you don’t like it’.” “Being able to kiss my girlfriend in public.” “Finally being okay with who I am. Not quite out and proud, but on the way to it fuCK MY TEA I FORGOT ABOUT IT OVER AN HOUR AGO.” “Having the freedom to show every part of me and not be afraid to love.” “Being sure and confident and bold in a way that wasn’t there before. It means new experiences and freedoms that we should have been able to feel all along. It means living my life unapologetically in a world that has felt much lighter everyday.” ♦

Feature — Kupu Whakaatu

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There are heaps of events going on for Hamilton Pride Week, brought to you by Hamilton Pride, and UniQ Waikato, so come along and check them out! Mooloo Mix’s Love Your Body Workshop Tues Sept 12th 5:30pm - 7pm Link House, 2 Dawson Street Come along to a hands on workshop on how to make natural products. Create a special gift to take home with you to love your body or someone else’s. There will be some items (soaps, balms etc) for sale so bring some extra cash along and get your Christmas prezzies taken care of! $10 per person cash only (to cover ingredients, resources & materials). A Night of Learning Love Family Planning Workshop - Weds Sept 13th 6pm - 7pm Waikato Uni L.G.04 Join us as we explore the theme of healthy relationships and communication with Louise from Family Planning. PrEP Forum - Thurs Sept 14th 5pm - 7:45pm The Bank Bar & Brasserie (Upstairs) Ending HIV presents Hamilton’s first PrEP community forum, to provide an upfront and honest space to find out more about PrEP, a daily pill that provides protection from HIV.

Pride In The Park - Family Event Sat Sept 16th 12pm - 2pm Claudelands Park, Claudelands Come show your Pride and have a fun day out! Bring a picnic blanket and munch among friends and family, for a day of activities and laughter. See you there! Rainbow Warriors Trivia Night Fundraiser Sat Sept 16th 7pm - 10pm Waikato Commerce Club, 197 Collingwood Street Come wrap up Hamilton Pride Week by showing off your smarts. There will be many categories including Pride questions! This is a trivia fundraiser for the Rainbow Warriors, the only queer women’s sports team in the Waikato! Bring a team of 4-6 people or join a team on the night. Entry is a suggested donation of $5, but nobody will be turned away for not having this! ♦

Movie Screening - Gayby Baby Sept 14th 8pm - 10pm Lido Cinema - The Balcony, Centre Place Check out the facebook event for more details https://www.facebook.com/events/11085317629 5510 Ten Pin Bowling - Sept 15th 6pm - 8:30pm Bowl And Social (Sky City) Come and join the fun! Two (mildly) competitive games of tenpin bowling, couples, teams, or singles ready to mingle - the more the merrier! $7 per game. Pride At The Disco - Youth Event Fri Sept 15th 7pm - 10pm 9 Ward Lane Celebrate your individuality for Pride week ! Put on your flash kicks, grab your mates and get wrecked on the dance floor. For those aged 27 and under only, DJ and great venue. Drug & Alcohol free. $10 Door Charge.

MODEL AND STYLIST: RIA BHOGAL @RIABHOGAL @FAUXFURR

PHOTOGRAPHY: ALESSANDRA TANE @ALESSANDRAROSETTA

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Feature — Kupu Whakaatu

MAKE THE UNIVERSITY GREAT AGAIN PART 2 In part one of the Nexus series on campus culture we examined campus through the prism of WSU alumni Andrew “AJ” James and Contact 89 (RIP) FM’s Lauren Kerr-Bell. We got really excited about what campus used to be and a little angry about what it had become. After hours of anger we moved on to the question of who was going to fix it? It’s worth noting here that we didn’t fuck around and went straight to the top… Assistant Vice-Chancellor (CME) David Craig, Assistant Vice-Chancellor Michelle Jordan-Tong (Student Services) and Willam Lewis, who assists absolutely no one. The answers may shock and amaze you because they are working together to do stuff next year...

Has campus culture died or is it just evolving? Michelle: It all depends on how you define campus culture, there’s lots of aspects to it. Do we think it’s evolving? Absolutely, in fact more so now than it has been in the past five years. We’re having quite a few conversations with the WSU around what sort of environment we want to create on campus, what we want to do more of and less of etc. We’re currently looking at what 22

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today’s students want, focussing on student spaces, student facilities and how we can help the WSU with developing and supporting clubs, along with sport and the general vibe on campus. David: At the moment we’re looking at the whole campus, deciding what we want the future campus to look like in terms of student facilities, student accommodation, sporting facilities, social spaces and learning spaces. Once we’ve figured out what this master plan looks like we’ll then start building towards that. The essence of this master plan project is that students are at the center of it. Whatever we do is all about building amenities for students. William: You definitely hear stories of the good old days when campus had huge O-Week acts, a pumping student bar, and all that sort of stuff; which is a bit different today. I reckon a lot of the change is because students just want different things now. Back then, going to clubs in town every Thursday, or studying as an adult student with kids and a job was a lot less common too, so almost every student partied hard on campus. Now people do more at home or in town or simply want a different uni experience. I think it’s just evolving, and we have a lot of ideas to make it more vibrant.

A B O V E : S N E A D P A R T Y, 2 0 1 4 0 1 . O R I E N TAT I O N W E E K 2 0 1 4 0 2 . E A R LY P Ā P R O J E C T CONCEPT RENDERING 03. STUDENTS OUTSIDE COMPLETED STUDENT V I L L A G E . ( E A R LY 1 9 7 0 S ) * * C O P Y R I G H T@ U N I V E R S I T Y O F W A I K AT O L I B R A R Y

Feature — Kupu Whakaatu

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Has the reform to campus drinking culture had a big part in this change? 01 Does this plan include the proposed Marae? Michelle: Definitely. The Pā Project (which will incorporate the Marae) is part of the whole master plan, we’re currently just determining what student support functions will be in there relative to the student centre and relative to the Village Green because we obviously need things in multiple places. What it will provide is a more ‘all-weather’ space, because a lot of the University year is during winter, it’s great when we arrive when you’ve got events on the village green and at the end of the year but there’s always a good solid chunk where it’s not so nice being outside. So what this would provide is a huge canopy in which a whole lot of student social and formal learning spaces and food offerings would be. The exact mix of what would be in there is yet to be worked out.There will be student space, we’ve just got to work out, with the WSU, what focus this should have and how it aligns to the student centre and Village Green spaces. William: Yup, The Pā is gonna be awesome. It will be a really iconic Marae, but also have more social learning spaces and cheaper food

Michelle: We find that students prefer to go off campus to do their partying. It’s changed so much in terms of what students do as social activities, most of which being quite late at night, in town and associated with music. It’s not a late afternoon thing, it’s a late evening thing and the best option for that is what they’re currently doing. The University isn’t against fun by any sense of the measure. David: We experimented with the last two orientations for example, 2016 was completely driven by the University with support from the WSU but in terms of the band and the program and the evening entertainment that was put on by the University. Ultimately it was a mixed success I would say, we absolutely learnt a lot from that so we tried to modify it in 2017 and did some stuff on campus but linked more closely with the people in town and that seemed to work kind of OK. Now we’re having conversations about what Orientation 2018 is going to look like to deliver what students want and we’re in the process of formulating our ideas and working in conjunction with the WSU so we’re not doing it in isolation. William: Probably. The uni care a lot more about health and safety and stuff these days so there are some things we just can’t do anymore, even if we wanted to. Having said that, I think for most of the year people are pretty happy having a campus where lots of fun things are happening between classes, without necessarily having a heap of binge drinking every night. I mean, who wants to crack a funnel in IJK when you can just do it in the middle of Hogan St? There is a healthy middle-ground though. Bringing a few couches onto the Village Green for a cheeky beer or two on a sunny Friday arvo is a human right we should exercise far more often. ♦

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Full Exposure — Mārakerake

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Full Exposure — Mārakerake

Dan Jones is a Cambridge-educated historian, composer, TV presenter, and writer. His works, including The Hollow Crown (2014), and The Plantagenets (2012) have charted the history of medieval England, its monarchs, and the very real Game of Thrones-style stories of the Wars of the Roses. With a new book, The Templars: The Rise and the Spectacular Fall of God’s Holy Warriors, centred on the Knights Templar set to release September 7, Alexander Nebesky had an opportunity to ask a few questions of Dan – and do a bit of fanboying. What is it about the Knights Templar? After the real life Game of Thrones stuff, did you get tired of the brutality of medieval England and decide to switch to the brutality of the Crusades? They say that when a man is tired of the brutality of medieval England, he is tired of life. It wasn’t quite that, but three years ago I was certainly in the mood for something new. The Templars struck me as a story that had fresh geographical range and some exciting themes that were absent from a lot of my writings about England. Yet I also sensed the story would satisfy my inclination to subjects that are epic, have a degree of ‘name recognition’ outside the medieval nerd hood and involve dramatic examples of human badness. The arc of my history is generally towards the scaffold or the pyre, and the Templars, I knew, would not let me down on that score. What’s your mission with this book, what are you hoping to show people? That the real history of the Templars is just as exciting as the hocus-pocus bullshit about hidden treasure, Templar survivalism, illuminati hunting and secret whatever the fuck, which takes up about 65% of writing about the order online. (Another 30% is taken up with Muslimbaiters who think the Templars are a great role model today.) That you don’t have to layer on mystique to make this story fascinating: you’re better off stripping it back to the facts.

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is ‘yes, everything’. But I have tried not to make this an overtly myth-busting book, on the grounds that when a sane person starts arguing with a mad person, then from afar it is hard to tell which is which. Instead I swept all of that away and just attacked the historical story head-on – embracing the tale of an organization that dealt with private security in war zones, elite military operations across all terrains, global financial services, regime change and more besides. There are many points in this story where you will pause to think about the ways in which basic human behaviours and ambitions have remained somewhat the same over the last eight or nine centuries, even if the clothes and the dogma have changed. What’s do you see as the historian’s role in the world? Bullshit-sniffer, storyteller, rake. That’s what I’ve taken out of it, anyway. Why does history (the academic field) matter? Do things have to ‘matter’? I get very weary of the expectation that each discipline, particularly in the humanities, must justify its existence beyond simply putting its balls on the table and saying ‘here I am’. The pursuit of knowledge is a goal in itself, and a high and worthy goal too, even if the knowledge pursued turns out to be arcane or inapplicable. But okay, rant over, I’ll engage: academic history is the applied and rigorous study of all human endeavor and achievement stretching back to the limit of the physical record. That strikes me as pretty valuable, doesn’t it you? What are your exciting cocktail party facts you crack out when someone asks you about your work? I’ll give you one. The Templars were banned from wearing pointy shoes, because it was said that these ‘abominable things belong to pagans’. As a longtime reader of GQ I am inclined to agree. Do you have any advice for a 20 year old history student who wants to be like you when he grows up? Don’t be like me – be like you. ♦

Are there any things people might think they know about the Knights Templar that you are going to blow wide open with this book? If your baseline of Templar knowledge is The Da Vinci Code – a fine novel but a deliberately misleading one – then the answer to this question

Student Experience — Wheako Tauira

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Puppet Master Politics Jacinda Ardern When we first set up puppet master politics it was contingent that Lyam would get to ask serious and driving questions from the perspective of a political virgin. An every person who, unlike the rest of Nexus, wasn’t yet a raging communist or a pseudo-fascist neo liberal. Unfortunately, like most people he was swept up in Paddy Gower’s “Youth-quake” (™) and fell in love with Jacinda Ardern. I fear I have lost control of the puppet. Why should students vote? “Because they’ve got the most to win or lose this election and I don’t mean just as students, I mean as young people. This election we’re talking about issues that won’t just affect the next three years it’ll affect the entire next generation and at the moment they’re the cohort least likely to vote. So when it comes to the big stuff like homeownership, environmental issues and access to education all of that relates to students and young people so that’s why I hope they vote”. I can’t fault it, she’s too lovely. The way she holds herself is so pure, the way she talks makes me believe nothing can ever go wrong. What’s the thought behind offering free tertiary education term by term rather than straight off the bat? “Money. Ideally I would’ve loved to been able to do that be we just couldn’t afford to do it all in one go. By 2024 we’ll have the full three years free and available. On the upside, It’s also a lot less jarring for those who are studying now because they’re not gonna get that. When you know it’s being phased in over five years it probably doesn’t feel quite as dark that you’ve missed out in this way”. As much as I’d like my loan to be wiped along with all this free education I don’t even care at this point. Fuck it, I signed up for this degree knowing I’d have to pay it off at some point so I can’t complain.

Do you think this water tax will affect farmers and orchard growers? “Part of what started this conversation was the question of water quality. Our rivers are in a terrible state, we have to do something about it and either everyone pays or those who use water for commercial gain can help us. Water bottlers will pay more because they’re using pristine aquifers, for those who are using water for dairy or for food production the cost there will be pretty minimal, one or two cents per thousand litres. This will probably change and create some efficiencies in the way that we use water as well.” This is the point where I’d like to be able to argue a point but I honestly have no legitimate data to back it. However for arguments sake, if each cow produces 7445 litres yearly and each litre of milk apparently requires 1000 litres of water to be produced this number gets sky high pretty fast. This could still be an issue if it causes food prices to rise substantially, let’s just wait till some proper financial folk work it all out before we jump to conclusions. Out of all the cows in Morrinsville which would be your favourite? “Oooh massive call, probably steampunk cow. It’s a bit different because of course you’ve seen all of the painted cows dotted around, steampunk cow is actually made out of metal. Yeah she’s probably my fave.” Words can’t explain the passion in her eyes as she told me this, I’m convinced she’s genuinely the purest human. A true queen. Today Lyam Learnt: →→ Given the opportunity to ask meaningful questions about the environment, student accommodation, tax, Te Reo or the budget Lyam chose to ask about cows. →→ They say a smile in politics goes a long way and Ardern’s may literally take her to the top. ♦ 27

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Student Experience — Wheako Tauira

Club Spotlight Orcball Rose Swears Waikato Orcball has a long and fairly respectable history on campus; we’ve been playing on the Village Green every week for over a decade. The game has been alternately described as ‘those trenchcoats with swords’, ‘American football with swords’, and ‘sword fighting’. It’s safe to say swords are an important part of Orcball. Our on-campus games are casual ‘friendlies’, and yes, it is very much like simplified American football, but you hit people with padded plastic swords instead of tackling them. Oh, and the ball is a skull named Yorick. On second thoughts, it’s not much like any other known game at all. We play during Culture Hour (Wednesdays, 1-2 pm) on the Village Green in front of the shops by the lake, come sun or rain. Anyone can watch, but it’s a lot more fun to play (and anyone can play), so if you’re interested, just swing by, pick up a sword, and join in. Usually there’s time after the game to practice swordplay, duel, and for the veterans to teach new players sneaky tactics. There is a more ‘serious’ Orcball league – where ‘serious’ means ‘the games are a bit longer and we don’t always pick the teams on the spot’ – that plays off-campus on weekends.

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If you’re interested in meeting new people and killing them in a totally violent but legal and non-fatal way, we’d love to have you along. For more information, you can look us up on Facebook by searching ‘Orcball Waikato’, or going to www.facebook.com/Orcball-Waikato150655552156331/ ♦

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Columns — Maramara Kōrero

Pass the AUX Playlist_15

↑ MAC DEMARCO

Jacqui Swney Having recently gone on a road trip, forgetting to download a good variety of playlists to listen to, and really only being able to listen to old Kanye and Top 50 songs (that I actually enjoyed before we were forced to listen to them on repeat), I’ve compiled this week’s playlist based on what I indulged in after that mind-numbing mistake. Please enjoy, and always be prepared to spit fire on the AUX for a five to seven hour journey. Best to You by Blood Orange Blood Orange make a well deserved reappearance in Pass The AUX this week with his banger of a tune, ‘Best to You’. The beginning of this jam starts with an ambient production behind some crisp and clear vocals, keeping things simple and chill so you can focus on the lyrics being sung. But soon after, the pace picks up with a quicker, dancey beat that seems like he really enjoys the sound of a xylophone or a steel drum. He sticks to his almost 80s sound that we know and love, songs like ‘You’re Not Good Enough’ and ‘E.V.P.’ highlight Blood Orange’s distant sound which make him such an interesting listen. My Old Man by Mac Demarco With the recent first release of the Laneway 2018 line up, there was no way my boy Mac wasn’t going to make an appearance. His personality makes him easy to follow religiously (my mates back home saw him doing a photoshoot with an ciggie and a half-eaten banana, and if that’s not role-model material I don’t know what is). But his music takes you to another planet. It’s wavy 30

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guitar riffs leave you drifting through a meadow, while the semi-average-but-still-loveable vocals and delicious lyrics keep you suspended in the prime of your youth. ‘My Old Man’ is a seriously relatable tune about a father and son and how they’re alike. I could go on forever and it’s a shock that he hasn’t appeared on Pass the AUX yet. Give this dirty loveable lad a listen, some gold stars include Salad Days (the entire album) and ‘Without Me’. ↑ B LO O D O R A N G E

Dead Body by Chet Faker Once again, I bring the subject matter back to Laneway. With the release of the line up I’m torn between being able to afford food and buying a ticket, because people like Chet Faker made the whole thing a top notch experience last year. Chet is an A+ live performer which makes it nearly impossible to love everything he’s produced. OK that’s an exaggeration, I don’t love everything. ‘Dead Body’ is one that I hadn’t heard until recently but since then it’s constantly been on queue nearly every time I open Spotify. His production is smooth and jazzy, and so are his vocals. While it’s not entirely unique from everything else he’s done, it still remains a solid listen, if not purely to listen to his vocals. 7/10, love a bitta Chet. ♦

↑ MAC DEMARCO

↑ C H E T FA K E R

Columns — Maramara Kōrero

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Arts Dunedin’s Street Art By Waveney Russ (Art Editor for Otago University’s student magazine, Critic) Searching high and low for opinions on the most iconic Dunedin artwork to share with fellow warfies (please stop defacing our brand), I was coming up empty on choosing a particular work from the plethora of cultural masterpieces of the South. Do hoards of pitchfork clad chocolate factory workers demonstrate quantifiable protest art? Would the picture-perfect Vice-Chancellor’s office, refurbished with the paychecks of at least 18 humanities lecturers, exhibit gothic architecture of the highest craftsmanship? Surely a mumps infested first year in desperate need of isolation is the physical embodiment of the contemporary Otago psyche. However tempting these riveting social wonders became, an artistic culture in itself prevails throughout the copious one-way streets of our UNESCO City of Literature. Twenty-eight walls within the Warehouse Precinct of North Dunedin have been transformed into vibrant murals, displaying both international and local street art talent. As you travel throughout the city (best traversed on foot, those one-way streets fuck every tourist over, trust) colourful surprises wait behind drab looking commercial buildings or barren car parking lots. This phenomenon began with the visit of nomadic Belgian artist ROA. ROA plastered a single, however unique, Tuatara on the side of a commercial Bath Street building. Notorious for his aerosol work, ROA often features animals endemic to the locations he visits within his pieces. Word spread, and UK’s Phlegm journeyed south to send further ripples into the international art scene with his mythical Kakapo-like creature gracing the alleyway opposite

the Rialto cinemas. Street artists began to request invitations to adorn the streets with their distinct perspective of the Dunedin atmosphere. The potential for an art trail became immediately apparent. A positive contribution for both those attempting to promote and preserve the surrounding heritage buildings and street art fans alike, the Warehouse Precinct was about to be transformed into an international art exhibition of dramatic scale. A particularly prominent piece exploded from the side of a Princes Street warehouse in late 2014, fabricated by Italian mural artist Pixel Pancho. Titled “Riding Dreams” (pictured), Pancho demonstrates a complex interweaving of the human form, flora and metal to create a surreal image of a ‘not quite human boy’ atop a metallic horse. The mechanical nature of the piece is reminiscent of Dunedin’s connection to the Steampunk movement in neighbouring Oamaru, Steampunk capital of New Zealand. Fish devouring boats, metal Haast’s eagles, men riding moas, and the odd storm trooper here and there join this playful addition to the surroundings. The trail as it stands today showcases the connection our tiny city has to the rest of the world, artistic innovation, heritage-led regeneration and unexpected diversity. The works are thoroughly thought provoking and tie into the history, future, buildings and ecology of the Warehouse Precinct within Dunedin. There’s no need to travel to Melbourne to view the real deal. Our modest street art scene is simply two ATR flights, the same amount of money and ten degrees colder away! ♦ 31

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Columns — Maramara Kōrero

Eco Emporium For the Love of Cheese and the Earth Valerie Bianchi I love cheese. Everyone loves cheese, you say? Prove it, you say? I love cheese so much I spent a day hanging out with other crazy people on a cheese making course (thank you New Zealand Cheese School) followed up by hours in my kitchen making mozzarella and feta. I love cheese so much, I even married a French man! Ahhh l’amour du fromage. Now, I don’t want to pick on cows because, as I have established, I cherish the curd. But we have to face the facts that in New Zealand, biological emissions from agriculture contribute almost half of our carbon emissions. The dairy industry is also a known culprit of poor water quality, resulting in many of our waterways not even being swimmable. These are issues that are going to take a long time to unravel as they are related to our economy (immediate security) and our environment (arguably long term security). This article has been devoted to giving you information about the environment and corresponding actions you can take, like switching to reusable bags (instead of plastic), mugs (instead of disposable coffee cups), metal or glass water bottles (you get it). We as individuals have a huge impact on the health of the environment. But, you know what else can make a difference? Clear policy and regulation by Government. Staff at Massey University recently polled 150 people across political parties as part of an election survey. The results from this were clear: no matter who people are planning on voting for, they are worried about our environment. That 32

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is why this election, dubbed “The Environment Election” is so important and why we need to ask our candidates what they are going to do to protect and enhance our environment. What candidates are actually committing to and if this will actually help is not always clear. For example, many have talked about an emissions trading scheme. But is it ok that we buy our way out of reducing our carbon emissions while pouring money into another country’s economy? What about if a party talks extensively about incentivising electric vehicles? That sounds like a great plan, but is it enough of a step to ensure we live up to our “100% pure” image? Eco Emporium is in the process of collecting information about the “Environment Election” to help navigate some of these issues. No matter how you are voting, you should make an informed choice about how this might affect the environment. ♦

↑ BRIE CHEESE

↑ CHEDDAR CHEESE

↑ CAMEMBERT CHEESE

Columns — Maramara Kōrero

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The Morning After Flat Dinner – Best Flat Bonding Experience, Second to a Red Card Julie Charlton I’ve watched MasterChef almost three times, so I feel like I know what good food looks like and my privilege of having my dad’s fantastic cooking, I know what it tastes like too. Flat dinners are in the same category as river floats, they are talked about, everyone is keen but nothing is ever done however unlike a river float, flat dinners don’t have the risk of drowning in the mighty Waikato river or accidently pissing in a boat. I know it may seem like a big mission especially when one your flatties can’t be trusted to cook toast safely but the payoff is huge. In all honesty, the hardest part of a flat dinner is selecting a day where everyone is free and can afford to buy groceries. The best way to go about the dinner is dividing up small meals between flatmates and that’s why cuisines like Mexican and Chinese are good choices. Back when everything was sweet and the midsemester blues hadn’t hit my flat we pumped out one of the best flat dinners I have ever been part of it. Of course, we picked Mexican as the theme since all of us are regular customers of Mexico on Victoria St., even our Kmart decorations are still up because who doesn’t love Mariachi cartoons that definitely aren’t stereotypes. Everyone was in charge of one small dish from; tacos, guacamole, quesadillas, a bean and veggie mix, homemade corn chips and of course the most important, the salsa. I was put in charge of salsa and I like to think it was due to my extensive knowledge of the finer details of Mexican flavours. More likely it

is due to my poor time management and the fact that no one wanted to deal with my vegan antics with a more substantial dish. When everything was finally prepared it gave all of us a sense of pride and false security that we had our lives together and could make it as adults. It was refreshing seeing our dining table covered in somewhat healthy food rather than takeaways or my drunk flatmate on a Saturday night. Not only did we eat all well that night but we definitely made some great Instragrams. Flat dinners are a good way to spend some quality time now that we all feel a little empty since Game of Thrones has finished. If you do strongly hate your flatmates just suck it up and eat more than your share and run away from the dirty dishes. For a lot of us most of the group flat activities involve alcohol and I am not saying that a nice glass of wine or DB won’t go beautifully with your flat cooked meal but having sober bonding is not the worst thing in the world. For one, no one will be crying and there shouldn’t be a hole put into your wall, robbing you of your bond. All in all, if you’re smart about your shopping list, this is a cost effective way of getting some good food with your mates. ♦

NEXUS MAGAZINE

Columns — Maramara Kōrero

Yam and Troy the Science Boys Christian Science Isn’t Real Science… Also, Renewable Energy Troy the Science Boy I thought about delving into the world of christian science today (notice how I didn’t capitalise that? Ruthless). My intention was to research how homosexuality causes natural disasters, and I thought, who better to contact about such a matter than our head pastor of Destiny Church, Brian Tamaki. Alas, he was unable to be reached for comment. Had he have been available, I thought I might also ask why he was cool with the consumption of eel and shellfish, but that’ll have to wait until another time. So we will instead do some learnings on the underdog of renewable energy sources, the power of our oceans. So if you have a look up into the sky, you might notice a big old spherical body up there that isn’t the sun (yeah, don’t look at that one, it’ll fuck your eyes good and proper). That celestial body is our moon and although the extent of its gravitational effects isn’t clear, we do know that it is responsible for our ocean’s tides. It has been estimated that the ocean, in its entirety, contains 1.332 billion cubic kilometres of water. I would give you an example of how much that is, but that is a bit much mathematics for me to be fucked dealing with right at the moment. That is a shit load of water to be moving about, which carries with it, an Imperial fuck load of kinetic energy. It’s taken humanity a rather long time to realise this however, we’ve only begun seriously focusing on it in the last 30 or so years. Today there are a bunch of organisations dedicated to 34

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researching and harnessing wave energy. Some of the devices designed and constructed for this purpose are pretty straight forward, others are all kinds of fucked up and were almost certainly dreamed up by fluid dynamics engineers indulging in the LSD. It has been estimated that around the world today, there is 2.11 Terawatts of unutilised wave power existing in the world. The expectation is that 4.6% of this is capable of being harnessed by wave energy converters. This is a whopping 97 Gigawatts, enough to power 970 million shitty, non-eco-friendly light bulbs, which given the opportunity is obviously what you would use such a resource for. There is huge potential for wave energy projects, and New Zealand should most def get in on that shit. I say that like there aren’t already people working on it, there definitely are, but they are struggling away and would hugely benefit from greater exposure to the general public. Our surrounding ocean has so much energy we could be utilising; energy that could help our country not get so much power hustled by that god damned aluminium smelter in Bluff (that thing uses way too much electricity, seriously, look it up, it’s fucking ridiculous). Come on NZ Government, hook it up, and then sort out some other issues, like poverty and shitty public transport and all that jazz. ♦

Columns — Maramara Kōrero

NEXUS MAGAZINE

WUG Life New Zealand Esports Tom Featonby S TA N D I N G F I E R C E – W W W. S T A N D I N G F I E R C E . C O M

PING ZERO – W W W. P I N G Z E R O . C O . N Z

ADVERSITY GAMING – W W W. A D V E R S I T Y G A M I N G . C O M

A S P ECT O F G A M I N G – W W W. A S P E C T O F G A M I N G . C O . N Z

Something’s not right in the New Zealand esports scene. Kiwis love competition (especially if it’s against Aussies) and Kiwis love gaming. The IGEA (Interactive Games & Entertainment Association) Digital New Zealand Report released in August 2017 shared that 67% of New Zealanders play video games! That’s crazy right? So why the hell is NZ slowly losing its place in the worldwide gaming scene? At the grassroots level, gaming is striving in New Zealand. We have some amazing grassroots organisations such as Ping Zero, Standing Fierce, Adversity Gaming and Aspect of Gaming all promoting gaming at that amateur level. The Ping Zero team runs massive PC LANs up in Auckland a couple of times a year providing competitive battle testing for some of our top PC based esports teams. Standing Fierce is king of the fighting game realm in NZ. They’ve been building the fighting game community in NZ for approximately six years by running tournaments and promoting positivity and learning. Adversity Gaming and Aspect of Gaming have both been a bit quiet lately but have put in the hard yards creating communities and growing the NZ gaming scene. Adversity Gaming has put on massive console LANs and have hosted internationally recognised Halo tournaments with winners going on to bigger events overseas. Aspect of Gaming is an esports purist group, mainly running tournaments for games like League of Legends, DOTA 2 and Hearthstone. As a leader of a gaming community myself (Waikato United Gaming Society), I wanted to look into why esports isn’t bigger in our small country.

Why, even with all this amazing work being put in, are we struggling to gain traction? After having a chat with some gaming leaders within NZ the consensus is GREED! There are bastards with their hands out wanting to capitalise on the work put in by the aforementioned groups. Right now there are two main culprits. Letsplay.live and New Zealand E-Sports Federation (NZESF). Don’t get me wrong here, Letsplay.live (LPL) isn’t all bad. They’ve done a great job at shovelling esports, with the help of Sky TV (almost RIP, we all know it’s coming), to the masses. But it’s all on the back of the hard yards put in by grassroots communities that they have made their money. They’ve swooped in, taken control and given the big middle finger to those whose backs they’re standing on. And that’s only the start of it! John McRae (Managing Director of LPL) has allegedly fluffed registration numbers for sponsors and refused to pay out prize money where it was due. The NZESF are a bit of a joke to be honest. They’re the self-appointed governing body of esports in New Zealand. They have their hand out for cash anytime anyone hosts an esports tournament in NZ. It’s messed up! Oh and guess who is part of the NZESF team? John ‘Sticky Fingers’ McRae. If esports is going to thrive and survive in New Zealand two things need to happen: The grassroots champions need to keep doing their thing and we need to stop supporting LPL. Too easy, right?♦

Snapped â&#x20AC;&#x201D; Atapaki

SNAPPED.

NEXUS MAGAZINE

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NER

WIN

Blind Date — He aru makau

NEXUS MAGAZINE

Blind—

Brought to you by House on Hood Street. Each week Nexus attempts to make a romantic connection. If you're keen for a date on us, email editor@nexusmag.co.nz He’s a chiseled athlete who’s addicted to talking about his love of Europe. She’s a semi-professional pole dancer with a lacklustre blind date history and a craving for true love. Will this intrepid man be the match our dancing queen has been waiting for? He said: Prepared for the blind date by starting the night off with not one, not two, but three cheeky sips of dirty Diesel to overcome the nerves - I don’t know if she realised I was this wild but if she did, she was cool and never said anything. We got chatting and as a recent expert world traveller, we quickly bonded over travels to Europe, what type of shoes to wear to Europe, the best countries in Europe and everything Europe. We get it, I went to Europe. Found out this was her second blind date she had been on (#Greedy) so it felt less special, however later finding out she was a pole dancer really brought the spark back. Jackpot! We both got a bit distracted as my friends kept conveniently using the ‘out of order’ toilet by our table - you guys knew it was locked and yous ain’t shit! I was confused as fuck to why she was drinking iced tea until the end when I found out it was alcoholic, noooice. Overall was an OK date thanks to the company. The convo started getting a bit slow towards the end so I waited for her flatty to pick her up. She was a bit too tame for me so no love at first sight. Sorry to disappoint FOLKS, no eventful antics. Kia ora Nexus. Europe was amazing.

She said: Now, as a seasoned blind date veteran and someone who seems to have terrible luck with males (all the one who like me are dropkicks and the ones who aren’t dropkicks never stick around… I’m starting to think I’m the problem here?) I went into the blind date with my expectations as low as my standards. I went on a Nexus blind date back in first, and to be honest, it was pretty average, and the guy said I had a flat a$$ in his write up. So for old times’ sake, I wore the exact same cheap pleather pants to this date to prove (to myself, if no one else) that my a$$ is not flat. Before leaving, my flatmate affirmed that my a$$ looked fab and that the two years of squats are paying off. Anyway, on to the actual date. I was ten minutes late and he wasn’t far behind me. My low standards were exceeded with first impressions: he was a good-looking dude and didn’t seem even remotely dropkick-ish, which is surprising considering this is Hamilton. We ate, we drank, we talked. Topics ranged from the usual (work, study, hobbies) to the slightly more obscure (prostitute museums in Amsterdam and the excuses we were going to use to escape the date if we needed to- mine was that the cat got hit by a car: I had my mate on standby to overact this if needed). Apparently, his mates had signed him up for this, and they felt the need to chaperone from a distance, which meant I had lots of faces pulled at them over my shoulder. I’m hoping the back of my head looked good for the not-sneaky, sneaky snapchats they were taking. We both had leftover pizza to take home (the box cost $2… come on House…) which was possibly the highlight of the evening. Not that it was a bad time, I just really like pizza. We added each other on various social media, perhaps out of politeness though- doubt it will go any further. Still a bitter, lonely, 21 year old.

Date.

NEXUS MAGAZINE

Puzzles — Panga

HOROSCOPES

Cancer: June 21 — July 22 Medical revelations loom in the coming noon. Diabetes is just a phase, consume as much sugar as possible.

Leo: July 21 — August 22 Embrace impulses, you need a treat. It doesn’t matter if you live in a tiny flat, go buy a puppy.

Virgo: August 23 — September 22 Break the meta, attempt chill vibes without the aid of herbal substance. Peep some smooth jazz.

Aries: March 21 — April 19 The passing moon symbolises a passing trend. Forget double denim, get on that triple corduroy hype. Taurus: April 20 — May 20 A brisk morning brings innovative thought. If you like Adele you’d probably enjoy stepping in front of traffic. Gemini: May 21 — June 20 Issues regarding finance plague your restless mind. Marry your best mate to cash in on StudyLink payments.

Libra: September 23 — October 22 Uncertainty is ripe in academic fields. Push past this negativity. You didn’t fail that test, you’ll be ok. Scorpio: October 23 — November 21 Creativity reaches peak at the closing of the month. Solidify a strong Tinder bio soon or risk a summer drought. Sagittarius: November 22 — December 21 Horoscopes are for the feeble minded. You don’t actually believe this do you? You’re better than this. Capricorn: December 22 — January 19 Why’d you do this, flick us a snap and we’ll hook it up Aquarius: January 20 — February 18 Push the limitations of your physical environment. A petrol light is just dashboard decoration, ignore it. Pisces: February 19 — March 20 Put your personal needs before all others. Equestrians are harbingers of bad news, avoid at all costs.

WORDFIND

N.21 / V.49

THEME: If the world ran out of any of these obscure items, we wouldn’t necessarily be fucked, but you’d be left thinking “Wow... how did we let this happen? As a human race of 7 billion people, surely there could have been someone paying attention to this. Now we don’t have any left, and I’m rather disheartened.” Cacti

Polaroids

Joy Division Ts

Barbed wire

Sleeping bags

Lip balm

Party hats

Flexi rulers

United Video

Postcards

Jellyfish

Cellophane

Shoelaces

Tissues

Pom poms

SIMPLE PUZZLES 4 SIMPLE PEOPLE

Who would win?

NEXUS MAGAZINE

Puzzles â&#x20AC;&#x201D; Panga

SUDOKU 1

1 9

4 8

6 2

6 8

9 8

1 1 2

5 6

4 1

7 8

Medium

Easy

2 4

Difficult

CROSSWORD 1

16 19

17 20

18 21

Across 1. Meteorological conditions (7) 5. Accolade (5) 8. Conclusion (3) 9. Submersible warship (9) 10. Task (5) 11. Alphabetic character (7) 12. Guide (5) 14. Square root of forty-nine (5) 19. Tableland (7) 21. Hoard (5) 22. Disregarded (9) 23. Small vegetable (3) 24. Happening (5) 25. Sincere (7)

Down 1. Twist (6) 2. Gruelling (7) 3. Overly eager speed (5) 4. Burrowing mammal (6) 5. Greed (7) 6. Exculpation (5) 7. Resides (6) 13. Component (7) 15. Fugitive (7) 16. Parazoan (6) 17. Chelonian reptile (6) 18. Leave (6) 20. Slant (5) 21. Aromatic wood (5)

WORD TWIST G

Find as words longer than three letters by connecting the letters vertically, horizontally or diagonally. Letters can be used only once per word.

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