September 1943

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lj c Bol. 15

Archer ^’epitmber, 1943

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EULOGY IN B FLAT By Erie Stanley Gardner

Apparently the thing started with a letter to Dr. Cathey from Bert Wallis, in which Wallis stated that he had been asked to carry on YE SYLVAN ARCHER for John Davis for the duration; that he understood &a^*"S Erie Stanley Gardner had passed away some months ago, and would tivities and endeavors and certainlv 'SNowS1ng SpOuId be commented on.” appreciate an article from Doc Now, Dr. George Cathey is in no Cathey “which would give our read­ ers an insight into the noble char­ position to write anything that will acter and qualities of the man.” The nobM °br readers an insight into the letter then goes on to state, “It is noble character and qualities of the if Wbody can do that regrettable the custom has been to man- . eulogize a person when he is gone. except Old Alan Gardner himself, and It would be much better to honor him, if anybody thinks I’m going to let Doctor George” waste space in any praise him, while living.” amateurish attempts at eulogies', Now, doctors are not like buzzards; wrapped up in lukewarm praise and they’re like eagles. If they can’t make filled with with tongue-in-cheek plat­ the kill themselves, they will have itudes, he’s just crazy as hell. No sir, none of it. So Doc Cathey. feels his if any eulogies are to be written W cautiously. He writes a letter to about Gardner, Gardner is going to jean Bethell, my secretary, stating raat he has heard I have been feel- write Now,them! to get a slant at these “noble a little “under the weather,” and qualities,” let’s get squared away trusts it was nothing serious. * ’ right at the start. In the first place, « the best recommendation I have never done a damn thing for Doctor George’s” medical ability archery; but archery has done a lot w ®ver heard. I had always thought for me. All I have ever done <is shoot teni„ ps, was hearing Noyes Tyrrell a bow and arrow and talk about it. I: about how the emergency sur- About the biggest game I have ever are a few of the ubiquitious, and L*ere about to cut his leg off bagged laminated by-products of bovine di­ in? n!?ng,bim slim chances of pull- gestive So even I won’t try Geor„ °2gb> at that> when in busts to claim activity. ’ve done anything for arch­ chanf Cathey. pushing the other ery. But Iwhen it comes to what arch­ triud bin- °f the ™y;7ike a whirl- ery has done for me, we encounter a sit! a waste, basket. “No gray horse of an entirely different lee' r i? areu’t going to cut off that , time ,,that, TI Be’. ;T10?y that man. He’s an archer, color. Take, for instance, the that Im "e fine Physical condition first met George Cathey and we drove tesularf. eST,„° an archer who hunts on a Saturday out into the virgin We’ll „ y' ni take the' responsibility. forest, and as we made camp about “ save that leg!” dusk, I started planning the hunt for B”td by beck he did it. the next day. I will never forget the heen a new one. The guy has sanctimonious look on Georges face ueaa for weeks. Hopeless? Not

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