ALLIE YORK
Let’s Geek It On
Copyright © 2021 by Allie York
All rights reserved.
All rights reserved worldwide.
No part of this book may be reproduced, copied or transmitted in any medium, whether electronic, internet or otherwise, without the expressed permission of the author. This is a work of fiction. All characters, events, locations, and names occurring in this book are the product of the author’s imagination or are the property of their respective owners and are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual events, locations, or persons (living or dead), is entirely coincidental and not intended by the author. All trademarks and trade names are used in a fictitious manner and are in no way endorsed by or an endorsement of their respective owners.
May contain sexual situations, violence, sensitive and offensive language, and mature topics.
Recommended for age 18 years and up.
Cover Design: Images © DepositPhotos
Cover Design © Just Write Creations
Formatting: Vicki Fryer at Formats by Vicki
Editing: My Notes in the Margin
Proofreading: Geeky Girl Author Services
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Epilogue
Need more Words for Nerds? Prologue
Other books by this author: Stay Connected
CONTENTS
Amelia
CHAPTER ONE
I turn down the Queen blasting in my car, staring up at the old Victorian house and taking a steadying breath. I’m a shit sister and aunt. It’s one of those situations where you feel something is a minor inconvenience, so you put it off and by the time you get around to it, so much time has passed you’ve made it awkward. I haven’t seen my brother and nieces in five months. FIVE. That may not seem like much to most, but I moved out of this exact house five months ago after a huge fight, so it’s a lot of time to let pass. I meant to come back, I meant to apologize for my behavior, and I meant to fix it. But I didn’t, and now I’m here.
I glance at the empty passenger seat and think of all my new friends. One of them would have come for moral support, especially Simon, but I wasn’t going to ask. I need to do this alone, so here I am with my big girl panties on. Sort of. Maybe my medium girl panties. Any contact I’ve had with the man who raised me has been through his wife, so I’m guessing my older brother isn’t going to be happy to see me. He and I have never had to navigate a situation
like this one. Sure, we had a few fights when I was a kid, and a lot more when I was a teen, but I’m an adult now. He is probably so hurt. My nieces probably think I bailed on them for good, and then there’s Clark. I haven’t seen my dog in so long that he’s probably forgotten me. Five months is a long time in dog years. I look down at my outfit and brace for Ewan to say something about it. My style has changed a little since moving. I still wear just as much black, but I learned how to play up my curves in the last few months, and I’m not sure my brother is going to appreciate that. Oh well, time to woman up and face my fears. Queen slowly fades into Chaka Khan singing about being every woman. I press the button on my radio, turn off the car, and take a deep breath. I get out, closing my car door quietly and drag my feet up the gravel path through the yard. Before I can even set foot on the first step, the door opens, and I’m faced with the person I’m dreading the most. I hold my breath and wait for the tirade.
Jovie crosses her arms over her chest and glares down at me. My sister-in-law is absolutely the scariest human I’ve ever met. I’ve rarely been on the receiving end of her wrath, but I’ve seen it and it’s not a pretty thing. I open my mouth to talk but Jovie beats me to it, “About damn time you show back up.” I can feel the disappointment in her voice. Jovie is the closest thing I have to a mom or a sister and I love her more than anything. Maybe more than I love my brother. I’m terrified to speak but Jovie is never afraid to talk, “Do you know how pissed we are at you? Do you know how much he’s worried? And I swear to God if you say sorry right now, I will… I don’t know. You’re an adult now so it’s assault if I kick your ass. Get in here. Now.” All her words come out rushed and angry. I don’t break eye contact, it’s a sign of weakness.
I nod once and hurry up the steps to the door. Before I can cross the threshold, I’m attacked. Jovie is about five inches taller than me, and that’s just enough to smother me in a hug. “I’m sorry, Jove.” I whisper it into her hair.
“I know.” She hugs me fiercely and sniffles. “We all have our moments, but you’re a little old for tantrums.”
“Yeah. Tell me about it.” I sigh and wipe the tears from my face.
“Anything I need to know before we go in here?” She looks me over, looks behind me at the car, and searches my face for something.
“Uh. I have a job, some cool friends.” I shrug.
“School?” She says it hopefully and I’m thrown back to the moment I packed all my stuff and stormed out.
“Jovie.” I sigh. “I’m just…it’s not my thing.”
“It wasn’t mine at first either, but you… I’ll try to avoid the topic. No promises. He wants you to succeed and he can’t help but be pretty pissed off about it.” Jovie kisses my forehead and we step into the chaos. The house smells like spices so Ewan is cooking dinner. A dog barks, a kid squeals, and I hear my brother laugh. I leave my Vans with the other shoes in the foyer and pass the stairs toward the kitchen. Before I can get to the tiled floor, Clark comes at me like a lion after a gazelle. All seventy pounds of him crashes into me and I fall back on my ass in a pile of limbs, fur, and dog kisses. I don’t see Ewan turn around, but I get a glimpse of his face when I try to wrestle the fluffy dog off me. He abandons whatever he’s cooking and comes to stand over me. If Jovie makes me feel short, my brother makes me feel minuscule.
“Ames.” He reaches his hand out for me, Clark licks my ear, and I’m hauled up into his arms. Ewan wraps me up, squeezing me to his chest. He smells like home; he feels like home. He feels like every
time I messed up, every scraped knee, every mistake I made. I’m suddenly a hysterical mess, sobbing big, ugly tears and squeezing my brother.
“I’m so so sorry, Ewan. Oh my god I’m sorry.” I whisper to him while he pats my back.
“Nope. I’m sorry.” Ewan pushes me back by my shoulders to look at me. “I forgot I’m not the parent anymore. I get to be your brother again and you’re smart enough to make your own decisions. I… we raised you well enough to trust those decisions. Go see the kids and we’ll talk more at dinner.” Ewan hugs me again and waves me out of the kitchen. I look up at him, see the tears threatening his eyes, the smirk on his face, and I know it’s all going to be okay.
“Thanks,” I whisper on my way out. I pass the stairs in the opposite direction and find the living room littered with toys, games, blocks, and dolls. Jovie is in her chair by the window reading a book. How she reads in this chaos is a mystery to me.
Norah and Ruby don’t notice me at first, but Mae does. She waddles over to me and reaches up. I pick her up and toss her in the air before catching her. At almost two she’s so chubby and squishy. I squeeze her and kiss all over her cheeks. I can’t tell if she remembers me or just likes everyone.
“Melia!” Ruby yells my name as she pulls on my pants. Without hesitation, I drop to the floor and start playing with the twins while Mae sits in my lap, happy to be included by her big sisters. Ewan makes a ton of noise in the kitchen, cursing occasionally in his English accent, and Jovie flips the pages in her book while I play with my girls. Everything is back to normal. My world is back in balance, and for the first time in months, I can breathe again.
Until after dinner.
Jovie sets up the girls with toys and a TV show so we can talk. I know I’m not going to like this conversation. Ewan stops working on the dishes when Jovie comes back and they come sit with me at the dining table. “I’m glad you came back.” Ewan reaches over and takes my hand. I know how hard he’s trying, so I let him. “I need to know if this is because of a guy though.” My brother’s demeanor changes a little.
“A guy? What guy?” I literally have no idea what he’s talking about.
“When I dropped out, it was because I was dumb and in love and too young to make rational decisions.” Jovie clarifies, and my brother clears his throat.
Ewan glares at her. “You were in lust.” He gets a little possessive when she talks about the past despite the fact he almost married a monster when he was younger too.
Before they can argue further, I jump in. “There’s no guy. Look, I know you and I have issues relating on an adult level. You have that macho alpha thing going on, and it’s great having a brother-slashparent who wants the best for me. I love you, but I couldn’t keep it up, Ewan. I want a degree to be self-sufficient, but I couldn’t stay at school. I was miserable. I’m not quitting, I’m taking a break.”
“And without a degree how are you supporting yourself? Not right now, but in the long run?” Ewan runs his hands through his short black hair. We look so similar it’s hard to remember we’re siblings and not father-daughter. Same black hair, same dark complexion, same dark eyes.
“I work, like everyone else. I pay for my apartment, my insurance, food. Well, Tuesday usually feeds me. I actually work two jobs at two places, but either way, I pay for things.” I know this is going to go on forever if Jovie doesn’t step in and stop him.
“Two jobs? That’s my issue, Amelia! You’re having to work two jobs so you can make ends meet and none of that would be necessary if you had a skill to utilize.” Ewan’s English accent comes out when he gets upset and it’s getting thicker and thicker. Mine is practically gone, since I was barely old enough to talk when we moved here.
“Uh. I work two jobs and have a degree.” Jovie to the rescue. He gives her a look and she gives it back. “The bottom line is we don’t want you to struggle, and with three kids we can’t always be here to help. We know how important an education is to a stable life. Even if college isn’t for you, a trade is also an option. So, when you do decide what you want to do, we’re going to push you to do it.”
“I know. I just need a break. I need independence, I need to breathe.” I really don’t know how else to explain it.
“Okay. As long as this wasn’t about some boy… guy…man. Whatever. You’re an adult.” Ewan reminds me so much of my boss that I almost laugh. They look nothing alike, and Ewan is more personable than Leo, but they both struggle with their younger sister being an adult, and not the child they had to raise.
“There’s not some boy, I only moved about thirty minutes away, and my two jobs combined mean I can live alone. I haven’t actually started the second job yet, but I work at a bookstore and it’s fantastic. I run things when Leo leaves. I have two coworkers who are great and I’ve made friends. I’m good, Ewan, I promise.” I don’t know how to convince him, but I’m gonna try. The alarm on my phone sounds. “Sh- crap.” I catch myself, looking toward the living room at the kids.
Jovie giggles and waves off my near curse. “Everything okay?”
“If I’m going to make D & D, I need to go.” I silence my alarm and check my texts.
“D & D?” Ewan looks scandalized.
“Chill, it’s Dungeons and Dragons. They host a huge game once a week. I help out and sometimes play. I have enough time to get back if I leave now. Next week?” I stand up and they do too. Jovie hugs me first.
“Next week.” She squeezes me tighter.
“I love you,” I say as I hug my brother.
“Come back. Okay?” He pats my back and kisses my head. I know how hard he’s trying. Ewan is just a little too rigid sometimes, but what parent isn’t? I say my goodbyes to the girls, kissing heads and promising to come back soon. My brother gets one more hug as I leave, and Jovie stops me, squeezing me and slipping something in my pocket as I hurry to my car. It’s already showing signs of dusk, and it’s not even that late. This means my favorite season is here. I wave at them, jump in my hand-me-down car, and start it up. My Chaka Khan picks up exactly where I left her and I back out of the driveway, heading back to my new life. Not that my old life wasn’t wonderful, but my new one is mine, not my brother’s. Making my own way makes it better.
Chaka Khan moves to my favorite of all time, Bowie, and I roll down my windows, cranking my music louder as I go. My life usually isn’t as heavy as it was today, and if anything is going to destress me, it’s my boy David.
I pass the time by shuffling my playlist and replaying the conversation I had with my brother. He actually asked if I dropped out and moved because of a guy. Honestly, I wish. What guy would I even ruin my life for? I work with three men, but I hardly count them as the type to destroy my life over. Leo is married, I’ve only worked with the new guy, Jake, for a few shifts, and then there’s Simon.
Simon is probably my best friend. I know it’s weird to have a male bestie, but I don’t quite feel like I’ve reached best friend level with any of the girls yet. I’m not sure I want to. They invite me to things, we chat, and I’ve even gone to one of their sleepovers at Greer’s , but Simon is different. He’s the one I tell everything to and he’ll be the one who wants to hear all about my visit with Ewan. He’s the one who pushed me to visit. My music switches to Motley Crue and I hit the volume, checking my phone. I have messages from Tuesday, Simon, and Noralee. All of them asking how it went and if I plan to play or just watch tonight. I’m not sure I can focus enough to play, so I decide to watch and help in Second Breakfast, the cafe inside the comic shop. I break the law, texting and driving for just a second, and toss my phone back into the other seat.
A few minutes later, I’m pulling into the Words for Nerds parking lot and a sense of peace makes me feel at home. It’s just a comic shop, a very large comic shop that takes up three of the seven spots in the strip. The next building over is Marshall Law Comics, an independent comic publisher owned by Brian and Greer. Greer also works with me at Words for Nerds. It's like a little geeky family around here. My first job is across the street at Cover to Cover Books, my second job is here at Words for Nerds. My goal in life the second I walked into the south’s largest comic shop was to be one of them, and starting tomorrow, I’m there. I know a lot of girls have much loftier dreams at twenty, but Words for Nerds is it for me right now.
I shake off my weird sense of accomplishment and get out of the car. The faint smell of rain is in the air and I shiver. It’s almost winter, if Tennessee decides to have a winter this year. Usually, we just get a slightly longer fall until it’s almost spring, then it snows once, and boom, spring again. Either way, we’re in my favorite time
of year. It’s not hotter than Satan’s butthole, so my thick thighs don’t sweat as badly and I can wear one of my flannel shirts. I reach across the seat, grab my bag and phone, and stroll past all the cars to get inside. D & D nights are always packed and I was lucky to get a spot. As soon as I pull open the door, I’m met with the nerdiest sight in the world and it makes me insanely happy. People are in costumes, tables are set up with dice, signs are all over, and Rae is at the podium ready to welcome everyone to D & D night. Rae doesn’t technically work at Words for Nerds. She rents a sound-proof room in the back where she runs her pro-gaming empire. She and her boyfriend August joined forces and are now number one on EVERY gaming platform across the world. She’s a marketing genius, the world’s best gamer, and funny as hell. I make it in the door, put my phone in my pocket, and toss my purse under the counter up front. Before I can get to the game, Jake appears next to me.
“Jake.” I jump a little at his sudden appearance.
“Hey, you’re late.” He tucks his hands in his jean pockets and smiles at me. Jake is a good-looking guy with messy brown hair, brown eyes, and a nose you can tell has seen a break or two. It makes him look rugged. He’s probably twenty-five, fresh out of college with an English degree, and our new part-time employee at the bookstore. I also think he has a crush on me.
“Family stuff.” I shrug.
“You look nice.” He scans me. I’m rocking the same look I always rock, nineties grunge. Maybe it was before my time, but I swear I was born in the wrong decade. My black jeans are ripped, my black boots scuffed, and my red shirt boasts a black AC/DC logo. I even wrangled my curly, dark brown hair into a ponytail.
“Thanks.” I look over his khaki and polo ensemble. Our style couldn't be more different.
“I should go see if Leo needs me.” Jake pulls me in for an awkward hug and I pat his back. Jake has only worked with us a couple of weeks, and I didn’t realize we were on hugging terms yet, but I guess we are. It’s only slightly weird.
He pulls away and strides off with a wave. I wave back and immediately over analyze the hug I just received. If there’s anything he needs to know about me, it's that I am completely oblivious to reading men. I’m talking totally clueless. I can read women really well. I can watch for just a few seconds and know the entire story of almost any female; I can tell you what she wants from the conversation, if she’s genuine, everything. Last time I went on a date, it took me the entire date to figure out he wanted my best friend instead of me. I only found out when I saw them making out the next day. When it comes to guys, I’m slow. Except with Simon. I can totally read Simon. And speaking of Simon, he’s next to me a second after Jake walks away.
“Wow. He definitely likes you more than me.” Simon bumps my shoulder and we both watch Jake across the room. “I barely get a hello from the guy.”
“Your dorkiness intimidates him.” I shrug and slip an arm around Simon’s waist.
“Ah. It all makes sense now.” His arm falls heavy on my shoulders. He’s not built or anything, but his long arms are heavy for my five-foot-three frame. I tip my head to look way up at him. “I’ve achieved a higher level of dorkdom and some men can’t handle that. It’s a blessing.”
“And a curse.” I finish for him.
“And this is why we’re friends, my dear Amelia.” He squeezes my shoulder to him, and we start walking toward coffee and food. “Did you finish your main quest, or was a side quest in order? I wasn’t
sure if you had enough HP for the visit.” I freeze and look back up at him, giving my best ‘tone it down’ face. For those of us who aren’t the world’s biggest geek, HP means hit points and, in all things, nerdy, you have to acquire enough hit points on side quests to beat the boss on a main quest. Now that I understand his lingo, our conversations are much more meaningful.
“I was able to complete my main objective with no side quest other than a quick potion.” It didn’t take me long to speak Simonese. It’s one of the reasons we work.
“Ah. Coffee. Nectar of the Gods and restorer of all magic.” Simon raises his free hand dramatically.
I laugh. “Yeah. Coffee.” Simon is the most unrepentant nerd I’ve ever met and I adore him for it.
Simon
CHAPTER TWO
To look at me right this second, an outsider might think, Man, this scrawny nerd has it all together. Spoiler alert: I do not. Yes, I currently have my arm around the most gorgeous girl in the world, walking toward the highest placed table in the room, about to kill it at D & D. But the hot lady at my side is but a friend, and that’s never going to change. Amelia and I have been friends for a few months now, and normally work friends are the relationships built on mutual hatred for the job and coworkers. That’s not us. The instant we met, she and I shook hands, and a zap of electricity ran between us. In the comic book world, that’s called foreshadowing. In the real world it was no more than static electricity, but I’m the hero in this story, and I call the shots. Ever since the first meeting, we’ve been inseparable.
Amelia Alexander is stunning. I don’t mean she’s cute, or sexy. She’s a classic beauty with full lips, dark skin, and even darker eyes. She has one of those bodies songs are written about, and a smile that lights up a room. I know it sounds dramatic, but it’s true. And
right now, her arm is around my lower back, her head is on my shoulder, and I’m hugging her to me. From the outside, this looks like I scored huge. And I did, if I’m not into actually dating gorgeous women and only interested in filling the best friend role.
“Thanks for encouraging me to go.” Amelia takes her eyes off the table where a kid just rolled the dice and is plotting a move.
“You did it on your own. Tell me about your ‘go make amends with my brother’ playlist.” I want to lean down and kiss her head. I want her to tip her chin toward me, just slightly, and let our lips meet. But I don’t, and she doesn’t.
“I started with Queen, obviously.” Amelia moves her arm from around me to tick off songs on her fingers.
“‘We Are the Champions’?” I ask and she gives me a look that says ‘duh’.
I motion for her to continue “Some ‘I’m Afraid of Americans,’ by Bowie, not Bones. Although I do love Bones.” Amelia runs down the playlist, tapping her long fingers as she lists off songs and gets more animated by the second. If you ever want to put Amelia in a good mood, start talking music from any decade before two thousand. “Oh and Dolly.”
“Dolly?” I snap to attention and pull my eyes from her lips to her eyes.
“Yes, Dolly.” Amelia narrows her eyes.
“I love Dolly.” I have literally never listened to Dolly Parton other than accidentally when she was on the radio. I make a mental note to add Dolly to my own playlist.
“Of course, you do. Dolly is a queen. A goddess among mere mortals.” Amelia sighs and goes quiet.
“Goddess. Right. So, did you and Ewan work it out?” I change the subject before I end up in a Dolly Parton hole I can’t extract
myself from. I can only fake my knowledge so far with this girl.
“He thought I quit school and moved because of some guy. I assured him there was no man in my life who could make me do something like that.” She rolls her eyes. No, I think, but there is one who would encourage you to go back to school. “I wish he knew me better than that. Plus, if I want to ruin my life, it’s mine to ruin. I just needed a break though and to get my head on straight. I think there are worse ways to do that than by working my dream jobs and making it on my own.”
“Definitely,” I agree. “But about this guy ruining your life, is he here or are you hiding him?” I tease and she smacks my chest.
“You’re the only man I need, Simon.” She winks at me and my heart jumps into my throat.
“I am the best.” My voice cracks like a fucking teenager and I clear my throat. Well, that hasn’t happened since I was twelve. Way to go Simon.
“You are.” She tugs my arm. “Sounds like you need a drink. My treat.” With a wink, she spins from under my arm and heads toward Second Breakfast. We get all our drinks for free since she works here, but I’m not going to point that out to her. She drags me to Tuesday, the coolest employee of Words for Nerds, and our boss’s wife. Tuesday is also a HUGE Sci-fi author who writes under the pen name, Tyr Weatherby. Yeah, THAT Tyr Weatherby. Tuesday winks at me when I walk up and starts making the coffee Amelia ordered for us. I know mine will be exactly what I want because Amelia ordered it and she knows everything about me, down to how I take my coffee. Okay, so not everything. There are two things she doesn’t know. One is that I’m head over heels in love with her. The other is that I don’t need the job at the bookstore because I’m pretty much loaded. I work there for her. I had my two weeks’ notice in my
pocket the day she started at Cover to Cover Books. As soon as I met her, I tore up the paper and acted like I didn’t just make a buttload of money on an app I sold. I don’t plan on telling her either of these things. I may be clueless with women, but I know better than to ruin this good thing I have going.
“Here.” Amelia thrusts my drink at me and takes a sip of hers. A cheer erupts from across the room and we turn to watch a guy with pointed elf ears and a fur cloak cheer with his arms in the air. I take a drink and the warm liquid makes my throat feel a little better. “All good?” Amelia looks up at me, the little crease forming between her brows that I want to kiss. I nod. She smiles and all is right in my world.
D & D goes on with neither of us joining a game. Instead, we wander around helping where we can. Amelia tells me all about her trip to see her brother, gets a little teary eyed when she talks about her nieces, and then tells me all about the playlist she used for the trip home. I don’t have to fake knowing that list, even the more obscure songs. Amelia gets animated when she talks about music, so I bring it up as often as I can. Nothing makes me happier than when she gets excited about something. Her face lights up, her eyes sparkle, and I want to kiss her so bad.
I ache to pretend she calls me anything other than her best friend. I want to lay it all out, and I’ve tried, trust me. I’ve tried so hard to tell her that I knew the second we met it would change my life forever, but I can’t. Right now, I have Amelia securely in my life. I see her daily. I spend time with her, she does things like running up and jumping on my back, she kisses my cheek, she grabs my hand and walks with me. I have all those things. If I tell her that I’m in love with her, want to marry her, and then someday have lots of sex and babies with her, it’s all gone. Even if she, in some alternate
universe, feels the same, we start over, and I can’t do that. Suddenly, I don’t have the easy, carefree relationship with her anymore because I changed the stakes with a declaration of love. And then what happens if we break up? I’ve lost Amelia forever.
“Earth to Simon, come in Simon. Do you copy?” Amelia pulls me out of my futuristic daydream, and I blink at her.
“Zoned out.” I give her an apologetic smile.
“No kidding, where did you go in that dork brain of yours?” She genuinely wants to know, which makes me smile.
“It’s top-secret stuff. Need to know basis.” I shrug and she swings at my arm, which I’m expecting. I stop her hand and deliver my own light punch to her other shoulder. She squeaks when my hand hits her arm and starts giggling. That sounds makes me… yeah, let’s just say it’s not appropriate for the underage crowd in the shop. D & D is a family affair.
“Whatever. I’m going to see if Greer needs help with the customers.” She points at the front register and hops up from the chair next to me.
“Yeah. Yell if you need backup.” I turn all the way in my seat to watch her go. The black ripped jeans have a strategically placed hole on her upper thigh in the back, giving me a quick flash of her skin. I sigh and turn back around. Directly in front of me is Rae, also known as one half of RaeGun Reality. Yes, I’m so nerdy I play video games too. Even before I met her and her partner August, I watched them both daily.
“So, Simon.” She takes Tuesday’s chair and spins it toward her, dropping down to straddle it.
“So, Rae,” I echo, looking at her. Honestly, she scares me a little. Not in a ‘she could hurt me way,’ but in a ‘she’s a celebrity’ way. She’s also my boss’s sister.
“How old are you?” She narrows her eyes.
“Twenty-three.”
“And the app you made?” Apparently, my boss told his sister about the app.
“BabbleFish.” I confirm.
“Yes, great name, huge fan of a nod to my favorite book.” She offers me a fist bump, I take it, and we mimic an explosion in the air. “Anyway, it was purchased by?” She trails off.
“The US government.” I answer, a little uncertain.
“Right and for what dollar amount?”
“Yeah, I can’t tell you that. Sorry.”
“Well, shit. That means a lot. So, you’re wealthy. Like rich as fuck. Probably more rich than I am and I’m swimming in sponsorships.” It’s not a question. I nod. “And you’ve told Amelia?”
“No.”
“And why is this, pray tell?” She taps a finger against her lips, thinking.
“It isn’t relevant,” I lie. I have a very good reason for not telling her that I could literally buy her every book in Cover to Cover five times over and still buy a house, with change left for new cars and a pool.
“How exactly is it not relevant? I would think a man in your position would be happy to show off his skills and earnings.” Rae tilts her head, watching me. “It’s not bragging if it’s true,” she adds.
“Yeah, I know, but then I’m the guy she hangs out with who is not only a genius, but hot and rich too. That’s too much pressure for her to keep her hands off me, and our perfect friendship crumbles before my eyes. I can’t have my best friend falling in love with me.” I fake a smile and wink at her.
Rae studies me for a long time, blinking behind her glasses. Finally, she blows a bubble. The massive pink bubble comes at my face before she sucks it in with a loud pop. “You’re a good guy, Simon, and any girl would be lucky to have you. Also, you may want to go break up that little love fest over there before the new guy crosses a line.” She tips her head at the front register. I look over and see Jake laughing with Amelia. It seems like no big deal except she’s twirling her hair, he’s laughing and touching her shoulder, and they’re really close to each other. Without a word to Rae, I stand and take advantage of my long legs in getting to them. I get there in seconds, throw my arm around Amelia and stare down Jake, smiling like an asshole. Yeah, I’m nerdy, rich, and can be a dick, but I’m unsuspecting so I get away with it.
“Hey, Rae asked us to play tomorrow, you wanna do lunch?” I lie, hoping Rae and August can squeeze us in. Amelia’s attention leaves Jake and she turns to grab my face in both hands. My mouth goes dry for a split second.
“For real? YES!” She pulls me down to kiss my forehead and I close my eyes.
“Sweet. I’ll work out the details.” I squeeze her to me; thankful my voice didn’t crack again. A customer comes to the register and Amelia spins, letting go of my face so she can do her job. I watch her for a split second before turning to Jake, nodding and smiling. He glares and I pat his shoulder as I walk off. Jake is a fine coworker. I really have nothing against him other than he was flirting with Amelia, and we really can’t have that. I make it back to Rae and sit back down.
“Well played.”
“I need a gaming spot with you guys tomorrow, lunch-ish.” I glance over and beg with my eyes.
Rae looks at the ceiling, tapping her chin, then pulls out her phone. “I can make it happen, but I’ll need a favor in return. I don’t do shit for free.”
“Name it.”
“Oh, I don’t know what it is yet. But eventually, I’m sure a mind like yours will be crucial to my platform and I’ll cash in on the favor.” She tucks her phone away and looks at me, hand offered in a deal. I shake it. As soon as she lets my hand go, she scans the crowd, finds August, and puts a thumb in the air. He gives her a thumbs up back, and all is right with the world.
“You drive a hard bargain,” I say conversationally.
“It’s why I’m number one.” She stands over me, flipping the chair back around, and gives me a sweet smile.
“Thanks, Rae.”
“You are most welcome, Simon.” She walks away, and I turn to see Amelia and Noralee at the computer, Jake nowhere in sight. Mission accomplished for now, but it’ll only be a temporary fix. Just like any other guy who’s into her. And what guy wouldn’t want her? She’s kind, beautiful, funny, and brilliant. So far, I’m three for three on running guys off. Hopefully Jake is as easy to influence as the others. Something tells me he’s not going to give this up after working with her a little longer. Amelia has this superpower where she can literally win over anyone. Even Leo comes to get her when there’s a difficult customer.
“So, you trying to hit that? Or is she your girl? If she is, she just told me she’s not seeing anyone.” Jake stands over me, arms crossed, angry crease between his brows.
“She’s not mine. You can’t really own a person.” I gesture at the chair Rae abandoned and he sits.
“You know what I mean. You cock blocked me.” Jake slumps in the chair.
“Sorry. I was just sharing the news.” I shrug and sit up a little straighter. Not that I need to. Jake is about six feet and to my sixfive he looks short. He does have bulk on his side though. He probably has forty pounds of muscle on me.
“Look, I’m not trying to come take your job and your girl. If you want her, you may want to tell her though.” His words are supportive, but his tone and posture are not.
“Ames and I are friends.” I shrug.
“Whatever man.” And with a too rough pat to my shoulder, he leaves me. A stone settles in my gut. Amelia and I don’t really talk about relationships, we have other things in common and it never comes up. But if I had to guess her type, it’d be Jake. I guess he’s marginally attractive, if girls are into the trust fund look, which most women are. He just looks very basic to me. I watch him walk away. Who wears a polo to D & D? I glance down at my jeans and shirt. I look like the nerd in every sitcom. Converse All-Stars, jeans, nerdy shirt. Today it’s Star Trek.
“Okay, so Rae said one tomorrow, and I asked Leo to schedule my lunch then. You’re off, right?” Amelia comes up behind me and puts her arms around my neck. I wonder if she knows what she’s doing to me.
“Yeah. I’ll be here a little early, grab us coffees.” I let her hug me before she sits down next to me.
“Yay!” Amelia claps and sighs happily. I get it, we both love playing with Rae and August. They even gave us a cute couple name. Aimon. We also tried out Simelia, but it sounds like an STD so we passed on that particular name. “Team Aimon!” She holds her fist out, I bump it and we make an explosion sound. From the corner of
my eye, I can see Jake watching us. I keep my eye on him, but put an arm around Amelia’s chair, barely brushing her shoulder. We watch the rest of D & D, cheering when our favorite players roll well, laughing at victory dances, and generally enjoying our time together, as usual. We play a quick round of rate the costumes, a unanimous win to the guy dressed as Gandalf with his son as Frodo. As it gets later, the crowd starts to thin, and we kick into clean up mode. Wyatt, Noralee’s boyfriend, shows up in uniform and starts picking up chairs, folding them with us. The first time a cop showed up at D & D when I was there, I got worried, but he shows up for every trivia, D & D, and event night. After seeing him a few times, I got over my concern. Not that I’ve ever had a reason to dislike a cop but seeing them in my world is weird. Us nerds usually stay out of trouble. Tonight, is not one of those nights, and I’m really glad he showed up.
CHAPTER THREE
Amelia
It’s nearly the end of the night when I notice how chapped my lips are and go for my lip gloss in my bag to find that it’s not there. I don’t mean my gloss. I mean my whole freaking purse is gone. I pull out the items shoved under the counter, digging for my purse, and nothing. No cute bag, no lip gloss, no wallet. Oh god. My wallet. My rent is in there, my ID, my… life. Shit. I frantically glance around the room and see Simon talking with August.
“When I came in, did you see me?” I grab Simon’s shoulder, not caring that I just interrupted.
“Yeah.” Simon must realize I’m frantic because he completely ignores August. “Why?”
“I put my bag under the counter?” I start looking around, watching people leave and freaking out.
“It’s not there?” Simon takes my hand and pulls me to the front desk and helps me look. Of course, he doesn’t find a purse either. Then Jake comes to help. I explain to him what’s going on and he runs to grab Wyatt. In a matter of seconds, Wyatt has pulled in the
people leaving and blocked the front door. Being a cop comes with a certain authority that people respond to, so when he says to stop, they stop. He gathers August, Leo, and Jake to search the place. Simon stands next to me, Tuesday on the other side and Greer watches as everyone mills around. Rae grabs the mic and makes a plea for my missing bag. Everyone looks around, but no one offers it up. I go from concerned to all out panic as the minutes tick away and no one returns my purse. My rent money. I start crying at the thought. My apartment is not the nicest, but it’s mine and I can’t afford to replace the money for this month. I suddenly can’t breathe. No matter how hard I try to breathe all the way in, I can’t get a full breath, and my head gets swimmy.
“Ames?” I hear Simon’s voice, but my body feels weird. “Whoa! Sit down.” I feel myself being lowered to the floor and my head gets shoved between my knees. “Hey, can you hear me?” It’s still Simon’s voice. I nod. “Okay. Deep breaths. Slower.” I do what he says.
“My rent,” I whisper. “I got cash out. My rent money is in there. My ID. My cards. My life. I can’t even get into my apartment. My keys.” I start talking fast again and Simon shushes me.
“Calm down. We’ll find it or get replacements. No worries.” Simon assures me, rubbing my back until I’m breathing normally again.
“No sign of it. We searched everyone still here. Wyatt thinks they already left. Hey! Amelia, you okay? What’s going on?” I hear Jake, but when I try to look up, Simon lowers my head again and I put my head back between my knees.
“Panic attack. You should give her some space.” Simon’s tone gets tight.
“Chill man, I can worry about her too.” Jake snaps back.
“Not the time boys.” I hear Noralee before I feel her next to me. “You two go see if you can help Wyatt. I got Amelia.” She sits next
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But to return to my own personal narrative. After the adventure of the tea, nothing particular occurred so long as I continued in charge of the post. As soon as darkness set fairly in, I proposed, in obedience to my orders, to withdraw; and I carried the design into effect without any molestation on the part of the enemy. It was, however, their custom to take possession of the hill as soon as the British troops abandoned it; and hence I had not proceeded above half-way across the ravine when I heard the voices of a French detachment, which must have marched into the courtyard of the house almost at the moment that I and my men marched out of it. But they made no attempt to annoy us, and we rejoined the corps from which we had been detached in perfect safety.
The next day was spent in a state of rest in the chateau of Arcanques. It is a fine old pile, and stands at the foot of the little eminence on which the church is built. Like many mansions in England of the date of Queen Elizabeth or Henry VIII., it is surrounded by a high wall, within which is a paved court leading up to the main entrance. But it too, like all the buildings near, bore ample testimony to the merciless operation of war in its crumbling masonry and blackened timbers. There was a grove of venerable old firs round it, from which all the late firing had not entirely expelled the rooks.
Of the church I have a less perfect recollection. I remember, indeed, that its situation was highly striking, and that the view from the churchyard was of no ordinary beauty. I recollect, likewise, several statues of knights and ladies reposing in niches round the walls— some with the cross upon their shields, and their legs laid athwart, to show that they had served in Palestine; others in the more ancient costume of chain armour; but whether they were worthy of admiration as specimens of the art of sculpture, I cannot now take it upon me to say. I remarked, however, that the devices on the shields of most of these warriors, and the crests upon their helmets, resembled the coat and crest which were emblazoned over the gateway of the chateau; and hence I concluded that they were the effigies of the former lords of the castle, and that the family which owned it must have been at one period of some consequence.
It was not, however, exclusively in examining these buildings that I found amusement for my hours of idleness. From the churchyard, as I have already stated, the view is at all times magnificent, and it was rendered doubly so to-day by the movements of our army. The tide of war seemed to have taken a sudden turn; and the numerous corps which had so lately defiled towards the right could now be seen retracing their steps, and filing towards the left. It was a magnificent spectacle. From the high ground on which I stood, I could see very nearly to the two extreme points of the position; and the effect produced by the marching of nearly 120,000 men may be more easily imagined than described. The roads of communication ran, for the most part, in the rear of Arcanques. They were all crowded—cavalry, infantry, and artillery were moving; some columns marched in echelon; others paused from time to time as if to watch some object in their front; whilst a grove or wood would now and again receive an armed mass into its bosom, and then seem to be on fire, from the flashing of the sun against the bayonets. Happily for me, it was a day of bright sunshine, consequently every object appeared to great advantage; nor, I suspect, have many of our oldest soldiers beheld a more striking panorama than the combination of the objects around me this day produced.
I stood and watched with intense interest the shifting scene, till it gradually settled down into one of quiet. The various brigades, as I afterwards learned, were only returning from the point towards which the appearance of danger had hurried them, and now proceeded to establish themselves once more in their cantonments. The French general, either awed by the state of preparedness in which he found us, or satisfied with having called us for a few days into the field at this inclement season, laid aside the threatening attitude which he had assumed. It suited not the policy of our gallant leader to expose his troops wantonly to the miseries of a winter campaign; and hence rest and shelter were again the order of the day. But in these the corps to which I was attached had as yet no participation, our march being directed, on the following morning, to the vicinity of Fort Charlotte, where the charge of the pickets was once more assigned to us.
CHAPTER XVII.
T transactions of the three days from the 8th to the 11th of January, resembled so completely in all particulars the transactions of other days during which it fell to our lot to keep guard beside the mayor's house, that I will not try the patience of my reader by narrating them at length. He will accordingly take it for granted that the ordinary routine of watching and labour was gone through, that no attempt was made on the part of the enemy to surprise or harass us, and that, with the exception of a little suffering from extreme cold, and the want of a moderate proportion of sleep, we had no cause to complain of our destiny. When we first came to our ground we found the redoubt in a state of considerable forwardness—quite defensible, indeed, in a case of emergency; and we left it even more perfect, and capable of containing at least a thousand men. It was not, however, with any feeling of regret that we beheld a brigade of Guards approaching our encampment about two hours after noon on the 11th; nor did we experience the slightest humiliation in surrendering to them our tents, our working tools, and the post of honour.
Now, then, we looked forward, not only with resignation, but with real satisfaction, to a peaceable sojourn of a few weeks at Gauthory. We had never, it is true, greatly admired these cantonments; but the events of the last eight or ten days had taught us to set its true value upon a settled habitation of any description, and we accordingly made up our minds to grumble no more. But just as the line of march was beginning to form, intelligence reached us that the place of our abode was changed. Other troops, it appeared, had been introduced into our former apartments; and we were in consequence commanded to house ourselves in the village of Bidart. I mean not to assert that the order was received with any degree of dissatisfaction; but feeling as at that moment we did, it was, in truth, a matter of perfect indifference where we were stationed, provided only we had
a roof over our heads and an opportunity was granted of resting from our labours.
The village of Bidart is built upon an eminence, immediately in rear of the large common on which the advanced brigade lay encamped. It consists of about thirty houses, some of them of a tolerable size, but the majority cottages. Into one of the largest my friend and myself were fortunate enough to be ushered; and as we found chimneys and windows already formed, the former permitting us to keep fires alight without the attendant misery of smoke, and the latter proof against the weather, we sincerely congratulated ourselves on our change of abode. Nor was it only on account of the superiority of these over our former quarters that we rejoiced in this migration. The country round proved to be better stocked with game, especially with hares, than any which we had yet inhabited: and hence we continued, by the help of our guns and greyhounds, not only to spend the mornings very agreeably, but to keep our own and our friends' tables well supplied.
I have mentioned, in a former chapter, that the little town of Biaritz stands upon the sea-shore, and that it was, at the period of which I now write, regarded as a sort of neutral ground by the French and British armies. Patrols from both did indeed occasionally reconnoitre it; the French, in particular, seldom permitting a day to pass without a party of their light cavalry riding through it. Yet to visit Biaritz became now the favourite amusement amongst us, and the greater the risk run of being sabred or taken, the more eager were we to incur and to escape it. But there was a cause for this, good reader, and I will tell thee what it was.
In peaceable times Biaritz constituted, as we learned from its inhabitants, a fashionable watering-place to the wealthy people of Bayonne and its vicinity It was, and no doubt is now, a remarkably pretty village, about as large perhaps as Sandgate, and built upon the margin of the water. The town itself lies in a sort of hollow, between two green hills, which, towards the sea, end in broken cliffs. Its houses were neatly whitewashed, and above all it was, and I trust still is, distinguished as the residence of two or three handsome women. These ladies had about them all the gaiety and liveliness of
Frenchwomen, with a good deal of the sentimentality of our own fair countrywomen. To us they were particularly pleasant, professing, I know not how truly, to prefer our society to that of any persons besides; and we, of course, were far too gallant to deny them that gratification, because we risked our lives or our freedom at each visit. By no means. Two or three times in each week the favoured few mounted their horses and took the road to Biaritz, from which, on more than one occasion, they with difficulty returned.
With the circumstances attending one of these escapes I may as well make my reader acquainted. We were for the most part prudent enough to cast lots previously to setting out, in order to decide on whom, among the party, the odious task should devolve of watching outside to prevent a surprise by the enemy's cavalry, whilst his companions were more agreeably employed within. So many visits had, however, been paid, without any alarm being given, that one morning, having quitted Bidart fewer in number than usual, we rashly determined to run all risks rather than that one of the three should spend an hour cheerlessly by himself. The only precaution which we took was to picket our horses, ready saddled and bridled, at the garden gate, instead of putting them up, as we were in the habit of doing, in the stable.
It was well for us that even this slender precaution had been taken. We had sat about half an hour with our fair friends, and had just ceased to joke on the probability of our suffering the fate of Sampson, and being caught by the Philistines, when on a pause in the conversation taking place, our ears were saluted with the sound of horses' hoofs trampling upon the paved street. We sprang to the window, and our consternation may be guessed at when we beheld eight or ten French hussars riding slowly from the lower end of the town. Whilst we were hesitating how to proceed, whether to remain quiet, in the hope that the party might retire without searching any of the houses, or expose ourselves to certain pursuit by flying, we observed a rascal, in the garb of a seaman, run up to the leader of the patrol and lay hold of his bridle, enter into conversation with him, and point to the abode of our new acquaintances. This was hint enough. Without pausing to say farewell to our fair friends, who
screamed, as if they, and not we, had been in danger, we ran with all haste to the spot where our horses stood, and, springing into the saddle, applied the spur, with very little mercy, to their flanks. We were none of us particularly well mounted; but either our pursuers had alighted to search the house, or they took at first a wrong direction, for we got so much the start of them before the chase fairly began, that possibly we might have escaped had we been obliged to trust to our own steeds as far as the pickets. Of this, however, I am by no means certain, for they were unquestionably gaining upon us, as a sailor would say, hand over hand, when, by great good fortune, a patrol of our own cavalry made its appearance. Then, indeed, the tables were turned. The enemy pulled up, paused for an instant, and took to their heels; whereupon our troopers, who had trotted forward as soon as they saw what was the matter, put their horses to the speed and followed. Whether they overtook their adversaries, and what was the issue of the skirmish, if indeed any skirmish took place, I cannot tell; for though we made an attempt to revenge ourselves upon our late pursuers, we soon found that we were distanced by both parties, and were, perforce, contented to ride quietly home, congratulating each other by the way on our hairbreadth deliverance. From that time forward we were more prudent. Our visits were indeed resumed, and with their usual frequency; but we took care not again to dispense with the watchfulness of a sentinel, who, on the contrary, took his station henceforth on the top of one of the heights, from which he commanded a view of the surrounding country to the distance of several miles. Though, therefore, we were more than once summoned to horse because the enemy's dragoons were in sight, we generally contrived to mount in such time as to preclude the necessity of riding, as we had before done, for life or liberty.
By spending my mornings thus, or in a determined pursuit of game, and my evenings in such society as a corps of gentlemanly young men furnished, nearly a fortnight passed over my head before I was aware that time could have made so much progress. It seldom happens, however, that any period of human existence, whether extensive or contracted, passes by without some circumstance occurring calculated to awaken painful emotions. I recollect, in the
course of this fortnight, an event which, though I was no farther concerned in it than as a spectator, made a deep and melancholy impression on my mind. I allude to the loss of a large vessel, during a tremendous storm, on the rocks which run out into the sea off Bidart.
The precise day of the month on which this sad shipwreck occurred I have forgotten; but I recollect being sent for by my friend, during the progress of one of the heaviest gales which we had witnessed, to come and watch with him the fate of a brig, which was in evident distress, about a couple of miles from the land. The wind blew a perfect hurricane on shore; and hence the question was—would the ship succeed in weathering the cape, or would she strike? If she got once round the headland, then her course to the harbour of Secoa was direct; if otherwise, nothing could save her. We turned our glasses towards her in a state of feverish anxiety, and beheld her bending under a single close-reefed topsail, and making lee-way at a fearful rate every moment. Presently a sort of attempt was made to luff up or tack; it was a desperate one. I cannot even now think without shuddering of the consequence. The sail, caught by a sudden squall, was torn into a hundred shreds: down, down she went before the surge; in five seconds she struck against a reef, and in ten minutes more split into a thousand fragments. One gun only was fired as a signal of distress; but who could regard it? We possessed no boats; and had the contrary been the case, this was a sea in which no boat could live. Powerless, therefore, of aid, we could only stand and gaze upon the wreck, till, piece by piece, it disappeared amid the raging waters. Not a soul survived to tell to what country she belonged, or with what she was freighted; and only one body was drifted to land. It was that of a woman apparently about thirty years of age, genteelly dressed, and rather elegantly formed; to whom we gave such sepulture as soldiers can give, and such as they are themselves taught to expect.
The impression which that shipwreck made upon me was not only far more distressing, but far more permanent, than the impression made by any other spectacle of which, during the course of a somewhat eventful life, I have been the spectator. For several days I
could think of hardly anything besides, and at night my dreams were constantly of drowning men and vessels beating upon rocks; so great is the effect of desuetude, even in painful subjects, and so appalling is death when he comes in a form to which we are unaccustomed. Of slaughtered men I have of course seen multitudes, as well when life had just departed from them as when corruption had set its seal upon their forms; but such sights never affected me—no, not even at the commencement of my military career—as I was affected by the loss of that ship, though she went to pieces at too great a distance from the beach to permit more than a very indistinct view of her perishing inmates. Yet there is nothing in reality more terrible in drowning than in any other kind of death; and a sailor will look upon it, I daresay, with precisely the same degree of indifference which a soldier experiences when he contemplates the prospect of his own dissolution by fire or steel.
In the course of my narrative I have not made any regular attempt to convey to the mind of the reader a distinct notion of the peculiar customs and language which distinguish the natives of this country. Two motives have guided me to this. In the first place, it is nowadays known to all who are likely to peruse what I write, that the inhabitants of those provinces which lie at the immediate base of the Pyrenees, are a race totally distinct, and essentially different in almost all respects, from either the Spaniards or the French. They speak a language of their own—namely, Basque—which is said by those who profess to be acquainted with it to resemble the Celtic more than any other known tongue. The dress of the men consists usually of a blue or brown jacket of coarse woollen cloth, of breeches or trousers of the same, with a waistcoat frequently of scarlet, grey worsted stockings, and wooden shoes. On their heads they wear a large flat bonnet, similar to the Lowland bonnet, or scone, of Scotland. They are generally tall, but thin; and they present altogether an appearance as uncouth as need be fancied. The women equip themselves in many respects as the fishwomen of the good town of Newhaven are accustomed to do, with this difference, that they seldom cover their heads at all—and, like the men, wear wooden clogs. They are a singular race, and appear to take a pride in those peculiarities which keep them from coalescing with either of the
nations among whom they dwell. But all this, as I said before, is too generally known to render it imperative upon me minutely to repeat it.
My second motive for keeping, in a great degree, silent on the head of manners and customs is one the efficiency of which the reader will not, I daresay, call in question—namely, the want of opportunity to make myself sufficiently master of the subject to enter, con amore, upon it. No man who journeys through a country in the train of an invading army ought to pretend to an intimate acquaintance with the manners and customs of its inhabitants. Wherever foreign troops swarm, the aborigines necessarily appear in false colours. The greater part of them, indeed, abandon their homes; while such of them as remain are servile and submissive through terror; nor do they ever display their real characters, at least in the presence of a stranger. Hence it is that nine-tenths of my brethren in arms who write at all commit the most egregious blunders in those very portions of their books where they particularly aim at enlightening the reading public; and that the most matter-of-fact story, spun out by the most matter-of-fact man or woman who has visited the seat of the late war since the cessation of hostilities, contains, and must contain, more certain information touching the fire-side occupations of the people than all the 'Journals' or 'Letters to Friends at Home' which this age of book-making has produced. Frankly confessing, therefore, that any account which I could give of the manners and habits of the Basques would deserve as little respect as the accounts already given by other military tourists, I am content to keep my reader's attention riveted—if, indeed, that be practicable— upon my own little personal adventures, rather than amuse him with details which might be true as far as I know to the contrary, but which, in all probability, would be false.
Proceed we, then, in our own way. From the day of the shipwreck up to the 23d of the month, I have no recollection of any occurrence worthy to be recorded. Advantage was taken, it is true, of that period of rest to lay in a fresh stock of tea and other luxuries, with the means of accomplishing which an opportune disbursement of one month's pay supplied us. These we purchased in a market which
certain speculating traders had established, and which followed the movements of the army from post to post. The grand depot of all was, however, Secoa, between which port and England communication was regularly kept up; and thither I and my comrades resorted for such more curious articles as habit or caprice prompted us to purchase. Moreover, by coursing, shooting, and riding,— sometimes to Biaritz, and the house of our pretty French women; sometimes to St Jean de Luz, where, by the way, races were regularly established; and occasionally to the cantonments of a friend in another division—we found our days steal insensibly, and therefore agreeably, away; nor was it without a feeling somewhat akin to discontent that we saw ourselves again setting forth to take our turn of outpost duty at the old station beside Fort Charlotte.
CHAPTER XVIII.
A the circumstances attending our present tour of duty had in them more to interest and excite than usual, I shall describe them at greater length.
The air was cold and bracing; it was a fine clear wintry day, when the corps to which I was attached, strengthened by the half of another battalion, began its march to the front. Instead of employing eighteen hundred men at the outposts, nine hundred were now esteemed capable of providing for the safety of the left column of the army; and such was accordingly the extent of the force which, under the command of a lieutenant-colonel, took the direction of the mayor's house. On arriving there we found matters in a somewhat different order from that in which we used to find them. The enemy, it appeared, had abandoned the ground which their pickets formerly occupied. Our advanced parties were, in consequence, pushed forward; and the stations of the extreme sentinels were now in front of that ground upon which so much fighting had taken place in the beginning of last month. The guards themselves, instead of being hutted in and about the chateau, were disposed among a range of cottages in the very centre of the field of battle; and the objects which were by this means kept constantly before their eyes were certainly not of the most cheering or encouraging description.
It was not my lot to take charge of a picket-guard on the immediate day of our advance. My business, on the contrary, was to superintend the erection of works, which appeared to me to be thrown up as much for the purpose of giving the soldiers employment, and keeping their blood in circulation, as to oppose an obstacle to the advance of Marshal Soult, from whom no serious attack was now apprehended. On the following morning, however, I led my party to the front; nor have I frequently spent twenty-four hours in a state of higher excitement than I experienced during the progress of the day and the night which succeeded this movement.
In the first place, the weather had changed greatly for the worse. The frost continued, indeed, as intense—perhaps it was more intense than ever; but the snow came down in huge flakes, which a cold north-east wind drove into our faces. The hut into which the main body of the guard was ushered presented the same ruinous appearance with almost every other house similarly situated; it furnished no shelter against the blast, and very little against the shower. Intelligence had, moreover, been conveyed to us by a deserter, that Soult, irritated at the surprisal of his post upon the Nive, was determined to retaliate whenever an opportunity might occur; and it was more than hinted, that one object of the late retrogression from our front was to draw us beyond our regular line, and so place us in an exposed situation. The utmost caution and circumspection were accordingly enjoined, as the only means of frustrating his designs; and of these the necessity naturally increased as daylight departed.
That I might not be taken by surprise, in case any attack was made upon me after dark, I devoted a good proportion of the day to a minute examination of the country in front and on each flank of my post. For this purpose I strolled over the fields, and found them strewed with the decaying bodies of what had once been soldiers. The enemy, it was evident, had not taken the trouble to bury even their own dead; for, of the carcasses around me, as many, indeed more, were arrayed in French than in British uniforms. No doubt they had furnished food for the wolves, kites, and wild dogs from the thickets—for the flesh of the most of them was torn, and the eyes of almost all were dug out; yet there was one body, the body of a French soldier, quite untouched; and how it chanced to be so, the reader may judge for himself, as soon as he has perused the following little story.
About the middle of the line covered by my chain of sentries was a small straggling village, containing a single street, about twenty cottages, and as many gardens. In the street of that village lay about half-a-dozen carcasses more than half devoured by birds and beasts of prey, and in several of the gardens were other little clusters similarly circumstanced. At the bottom of one of these gardens a
Frenchman lay upon his face, perfectly entire, and close beside the body sat a dog. The poor brute, seeing us approach, began to howl piteously, at the same time resisting every effort, not on my part only, but on the part of another officer who accompanied me, to draw him from the spot. We succeeded, indeed, in coaxing him as far as the upper part of the garden—for, though large and lank, he was quite gentle; but he left us there, returned to his post beside the body, and, lifting up his nose into the air, howled again. There are few things in my life that I regret more than not having secured that dog; for it cannot I think be doubted that he was watching beside his dead master, and that he defended him from the teeth and talons which made a prey of all the rest. But I had at the time other thoughts in my mind, and circumstances prevented my paying a second visit to the place where I had found him.
Among other happy results, the more forward position in which the pickets were now placed, furnished me with an opportunity of obtaining a less imperfect view of the city and defences of Bayonne than any which I had yet obtained. I say less imperfect; for even from the tops of the houses no very accurate survey could be taken of a place situated upon a sandy flat, and still five or six miles distant. But I saw enough to confirm me in the idea which I had already formed, that the moment of attack upon these intrenchments, come when it might, could not fail to be a bloody one.
Daylight was by this time rapidly departing; and it became incumbent upon me to contract the chain of my vedettes, and to establish my party a little in the rear of the cottage where we had been hitherto stationed. By acting thus I contrived to render myself as secure as a detachment numerically so small can ever hope to be. There were two lakes, or rather large ponds, in the line of my position—one on the left of the main road, the other on the right; indeed, it was near the opposite extremity of the last-mentioned lake that we unexpectedly found ourselves exposed to a charge of cavalry during the late battle. Of these lakes I gladly took advantage. Planting my people in a large house about a hundred yards in rear, I formed my sentinels into a curved line, causing the extremities to rest each upon its own pond, and pushing forward the centre in the shape of a
bow "Now, then," thought I, "everything must depend upon the vigilance of the watchmen;" and, to render that as perfect as possible, I resolved to spend the whole night in passing from the one to the other. Nor did I break that resolution. I may safely say that I did not sit down for five minutes at a time from sunset on the 24th till sunrise on the 25th.
The snow, which during an hour or two in the afternoon had ceased, began again to fall in increased quantities after dark. The wind, too, grew more and more boisterous every moment; it roared in the woods, and whistled fearfully through the ruined houses; and at every pause I could distinctly hear the wolf's long howl, and the growl and short bark of the wild dogs, as they quarrelled over the mangled carcasses scattered round me. Near the margin of the right-hand lake, in particular, this horrible din was constantly audible. There lay there, apart from each other, about ten bodies, of whom seven wore the fragments of a British uniform; and on these a whole troop of animals, from the thickets beyond, gorged themselves. Close beside one of these bodies I had been under the necessity of planting a sentinel; and the weakness of my party would not permit me to allow him a companion. He was rather a young man, and had selected the post for himself, in order to show that superstitious terrors had no power over him; but he bitterly lamented his temerity, as the situation in which I found him showed.
I visited his post about half an hour after he had assumed it—that is to say, a little before midnight: he was neither standing nor sitting, but leaning against a tree, and was fairly covered with a coat of frozen snow. His firelock had dropped from his hand, and lay across the chest of the dead man beside whom he had chosen to place himself. When I spoke to the sentry, and desired to know why he had not challenged as I approached, he made no answer; and on examining more closely, I found that he was in a swoon. Of course I despatched my orderly for a relief, and kept watch myself till he returned, when, with the assistance of my comrades, I first dragged the dead body to the lake, into which it was thrown, and then removed the insensible but living man to the picket-house. There several minutes were spent in chafing and rubbing him before he
opened his eyes; but being at length restored to the use of speech, he gave the following account of his adventure:—
He said that the corporal had hardly quitted him when his ears were assailed with the most dreadful sounds, such as, he was very certain, no earthly creature could produce; that he saw through the gloom a whole troop of devils dancing beside the water's edge; and that a creature in white came creeping towards his post, groaning heavily all the way. He endeavoured to call out to it, but the words stuck in his throat, nor could he utter so much as a cry. Just then he swore that the dead man sat up and stared him in the face; after which he had no recollection of anything, till he found himself in the picket-house. I have no reason to suspect that man of cowardice; neither, as my reader will easily believe, did I treat his story with any other notice than a hearty laugh; but in the absolute truth of it he uniformly persisted, and, if he be alive, persists I daresay to this hour.
After this adventure with my foolhardy and at the same time superstitious follower, nothing occurred during the night which seems to deserve special notice. As I have already mentioned, I took care to visit the sentinels so often that danger of surprisal was effectually averted. That these constant perambulations would have been undertaken as a matter of choice I by no means pretend to say, for it was a night of storm and intense cold: but I felt my situation to be a critical one; and feeling so, I should have been less at ease by the side of a comfortable fire than I was while forcing my way against the wind and snow. Nor had I any reason to find fault with the conduct of my men. Being warned of their danger in good time, they were thoroughly on the alert to guard against it. I found each sentry more watchful than his neighbour—in other words, one and all of them completely on the qui vive.
I recollect, indeed, on one occasion being put a little upon my mettle. It was about two in the morning when I was informed by a soldier, who kept watch at the extremity of the hamlet, that he had heard within the last ten minutes a more than usual noise in a large house about a hundred and fifty yards in front of his post. He described it to me as if people were tearing up boards, or thumping down heavy
weights upon the floor; and he himself seemed to think that a body of infantry had arrived and established themselves within the building. I listened attentively in order to catch any sound which might proceed from that quarter, but none reached me. He persisted, however, in his story; and added, that if the noise which he had heard proceeded not from men, it must come from spirits. "And why not from dogs or wolves?" said I. "Because dogs and wolves cannot split wood," said he; "and I will swear, that if ever I heard planks torn asunder, I heard it now." Being little inclined to leave the matter in doubt, I remained with the sentinel, and despatched my orderly to bring up half-adozen men for the purpose of making a reconnaissance.
The reader has probably anticipated that I found the house empty. It was so; for, after stealing through the street with the utmost caution —stopping every two minutes and applying my ear to the ground, in order to catch the slightest noise—after peeping over the garden wall, listening at the entrance, and creeping up the front steps with the pace of a burglar, I found that the chateau was wholly tenantless; and what was more, that not a trace of its having been recently visited, at least by human beings, could be discovered. Nevertheless I commended the soldier for his watchfulness, advised him to continue equally vigilant as long as he should remain on duty, and leaving it to himself to decide whether the sounds which he had reported proceeded from ghosts or more tangible creatures, I quitted him.
It may not be amiss if I state here, what I have already more than hinted, that on all these occasions I was accompanied by a spaniel bitch. I had brought the creature with me from England when she was a puppy of only nine months old; and she became attached to me in a degree such as would not in all probability have been the case had my mode of life being more settled, and she in consequence less my companion. Nor was it only because I was fond of the animal that I taught her to follow my fortunes thus closely. A well-trained dog is no bad helpmate to an officer who has charge of an outpost; indeed I was never greatly alarmed, notwithstanding the communications of my vedettes, unless my four-footed patrol confirmed their statements. If she barked or growled, then I felt
assured that something dangerous was near; if she continued quiet, I was comparatively easy. To that dog, indeed, I owe my life; but the circumstance under which she preserved it occurred in a different quarter of the world, and has no right to be introduced into my present narrative.
In this manner was the night of the 24th of January spent. About an hour before daybreak on the 25th I mustered my picket, according to custom, and kept them standing under arms in front of the house till dawn appeared. This measure was necessary, not only because it is a standing order in the British army for advanced corps to get under arms thus early, but because experience has proved that the first of the morning is the favourite moment of attack, inasmuch as, by commencing hostilities at that young hour of the day, good hopes are held out of effecting something decisive before the day shall have ended. On the present occasion, however, no attack was made; and hence, after waiting the usual time, I prepared again to shift my ground, and to take post at the more advanced station which I held yesterday, and which I had evacuated solely for the purpose of making myself less insecure during the hours of darkness.
We had returned to our daylight position about a quarter of an hour, when a patrol of light cavalry arrived, and proposed to plant a vedette upon the top of an eminence about a mile in our front. The person who commanded the party, however, appeared to be a little in doubt as to the practicability of performing the orders which he had received. He said that the enemy were not willing to allow that height to be occupied by us; that the last relief which had attempted to establish itself there was driven off; and that he was not without apprehension of an ambuscade, and of being taken with his whole party;—in a word, he begged that I would allow a portion of my men to follow him, and that I would support him in case he should be attacked either by infantry or cavalry.
To say the truth, I was a good deal puzzled how to act, for nothing had been communicated to me on the subject; nevertheless I determined to lend as much assistance as I could spare, and accordingly directed about a dozen men to follow the dragoons. Not deeming it right, however, to intrust a detachment of my own people
entirely to the charge of a stranger, I resolved to accompany them; and perhaps it was well that I did.
We were yet a half musket-shot from the hill which the cavalry were desired to occupy when we observed a superior force of French dragoons advancing from the lines towards the same point. The push now was for the high ground. We foot-soldiers could not of course keep pace with our mounted comrades, but we followed them at the double, and arrived at the base just as they had crowned the height. They were hardly there, however, when a discordant shout, or rather yell, told us that the French were ascending by the opposite side. Our dragoons, I observed, instantly formed line; they discharged their pistols, and made a show of charging: but whether it was that the enemy's numbers overawed them, or that their horses took fright at the report, I cannot tell, but before the caps of their opponents were visible to our eyes their order was lost, and themselves in full retreat. Down they came, both parties at full speed; and now it was our turn to act. I had already placed my men behind a turf fence, with strict orders not to fire till I should command them. It was in vain that I stood upon the top of the wall and shouted and waved to the fugitives to take a direction to the right or left. They rode directly towards the ditch, as if their object had been to trample us under foot; and, what was still more alarming, the enemy were close behind them. In self-defence, I was therefore obliged to give the preconcerted signal. My people fired. One of our own, and three of the French dragoons dropped. The latter, apparently astonished at the unlooked-for discharge, pulled up. "Now, now," cried we, "charge, charge, and redeem your honour!" The dragoons did so; and we, rising at the same instant with loud shouts, the enemy were completely routed. Two of their troopers were taken; and of all who escaped, hardly one escaped without a wound.
After this trifling skirmish, the French no longer disputed with us the possession of the hill. Leaving the cavalry, therefore, to maintain it, I fell back with my men to the picket-house; and, about an hour after my return, was by no means displeased to find another party arrive to relieve us. Having given to the officer in charge as much
information as I myself possessed, I called in my sentries and marched to the rear.
