View from the Backside

VIEW FROM THE BACKSIDE

by Barry Denton

Kamala & The Cow

(The views expressed in this column are not necessarily those of the New Mexico Cattle Growers’ Association or this publication.)

I’m confused now brown cow. I’m just guessing here, but it seems that the new Democrat vice presidential candidate Kamala Harris has been secretly hired by the environmental extremist lobby to destroy beef intake in America.

“I love cheeseburgers from time to time, I just do,” Ms. Harris said. “But there has to be also what we do in terms of creating incentives that we will eat in a healthy way, that will encourage moderation, and that we will be educated about the effect of our eating habits on our environment.”

This sounds about as un-American as you can get. Since when do you want a self proclaimed “savior” or former government employee telling you how to eat? I think it is astounding that this ol’ gal thinks so highly of herself.

Corporate lawyer Andrew Yang is also running for President on the Democrat ticket and agrees with Ms. Harris. According to Yang, “Certainly, meat is an extraordinarily expensive thing to produce from an environmental sustainability point of view. So I think it would be healthy on both an individual and societal level for us to move in that direction.”

I heard just last week KH was working with KFC, just kidding. What is true is AOC, being one congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio Cortez, is introducing a new bill in Congress known as the “The Climate Equity Act” which is considered part three of “The Green New Deal”.

There you have it a bill conceived by the bar passer and the bartender that will save America from that evil known as “beef”. The scary thing is that one hundred years ago you would have paid a nickel to see these two ladies in a carnival act, and now it’s possible they could be running the country.

My first question to Kamala would be just how did a lawyer become an expert on cattle? How many cattle has Kamala raised and just how much beef has she produced? What was her environment like prior to cattle raising and how much did her environment change after cattle raising? How painful was this experience and how long was she hospitalized during this period?

Am I to drive down the road, see a cow, and just know I’m going to die from it? For some reason “cancer” in this country appears to be a much larger problem than cattle grazing or is it me? I do realize that cattle occasionally get in the road and might be a health issue if you are driving too fast.

It appears that there are a host of other issues that Kamala is against besides just cattle. There are several reports of her being anti fracking, anti gun, anti Catholic, and

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Bethany Posey anti Indian.

According to Acee Agoyo of Vision Maker Media, during Kamala’s stint as Attorney General of California she opposed at least 15 tribal land-into-trust applications.

“Her actions undermined the ability of Indian nations to reclaim lands they lost to theft, fraud, and other negative policies. Using her position as the state’s top legal official, Harris also went up against tribes in two prominent sovereignty cases. Her arguments put her out of step with legal doctrines that were reaffirmed by the nation’s highest court in a historic decision just last month.”

Alright, I’m trying hard here to look on the bright side and come up with something nice about Kamala. To her credit, she does appear clean in public settings. I do realize that not everyone loves cows and steaks the way I do. Then it dawned on me, who does this silly chick remind me of, none other than Nancy Pelosi the speaker of the United States House of Representatives. The resemblance is so close that she might even be a clone.

To be fair, I did see a recent photo of Kamala with an alleged farmer in his field and she appeared to be listening to him. That part is pretty hard to believe, but you can do anything with Photoshop these days.

The farmer himself looked quite abashed. What a great photo-op for Kamala, but I heard that she refused to be photographed with a cow. After all it would not be dignified to be photographed with the bovine enemy that is destroying the earth.

Amanda Radke of Beef Magazine wrote that, “Harris called for changes to the “Dietary Guidelines of Americans”. Once again she is telling us she is an expert in yet another field.

Since we are already in a time of crisis concerning COVID Kamala knows that this is a great time to present herself as the answer to the country’s ills. Scaring people when they are vulnerable is a great way to gain control. Politicians just love a crisis and will try and create one where there is none. Don’t be a sheep, be a cow and let’s moo Trump right back to the White House. ▫