NNY Living Weddings Winter 2014

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weddings NNY L I v Ing

JANUARY 2014 Vol. 1 No. 1

nnyliving.com

COVER STORY

New trends in north country weddings {p.12}

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COPY $2.95

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STYLE

A perfectly polished look

VENUES

Hot new places to tie the knot

PLANNING Should you hire a wedding planner?

FOOD

Fun flavors for wedding cakes


1291 Faichney Drive, Watertown, NY 13601 315-755-2250 jcall@guilfoyleems.com / www.brucewrightcenter.com

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5 Newly Renovated Conference Rooms, Reception Halls, Meeting Rooms and Classrooms.

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• 1275 sq. ft. classroom capacity 80 with tables & chairs, 150 with chairs • 2390 sq. ft. meeting room cpacity 150 with tables & chairs, 325 with chairs • 1000 sq. ft. classroom capacity 49 with tables & chairs • 4600 sq. ft. conference room capacity 300 with tables & chairs, 650 with chairs • 4375 sq. ft. conference room capacity 275 with tables & chairs, 500 with chairs Handicap Accessible, Tables and Chairs Available, Catering Preparation Areas, Vending Area, ATM, Ample Parking, Reasonable Rates.

Now Accepting Reservations For All Venues


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6912 Bardo Road, Lowville, NY 13367

(315) 377-4045 • www.theridgeviewinn.com Welcoming Wedding Receptions up to 240 Guests!

Enjoy our Adirondack-style atmosphere while being captivated by our world-class food!

Don’t forget about us when kicking off that special day... Always welcoming Bridal Showers & Rehearsal Dinners. • Full Bar & Lounge • Buffet or Sit-Down Meals

Please call one of our representatives for more information.

No need to worry... No need to travel... Stay the night at...

Ridge View Lodge

7491 State Rt. 12 Lowville, NY 13367 (315) 376-2252 Fax: (315) 376-2977 E-mail: info@ridge-view.com

Located just outside of Lowville, New York on the ridge of Tug Hill in the Adirondacks!

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Check out our Dinner & Massage Packages... * The Perfect Night * Dine & Unwind

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*

Standard Double-Queen Rooms These are our basic rooms. They consist of two queen-sized beds, as well as a full bathroom. There is also the option of having two adjoining double-queen bedrooms.

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Single-Queen Rooms For those who only need one bed, we offer our standard rooms with only one queen-sized bed.

*

King Rooms Our king rooms are complete with a single king-sized bed. The extra space is occupied by a single reclining chair.

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King w/Jacuzzi Rooms Our king size bed with a jacuzzi tub in place of the original standard tub. Great for those on long business trips that need to relax.

We offer our guests complimentary breakfasts every morning. Laundry services are also available. We also give access to two conference rooms for large parties or meetings. For business travelers, we offer a business center with wireless and wired Internet access.


>> Inside JANUARY 2014

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43 DEPARTMENTS | 6 CONTRIBUTORS |

6 MARKETPLACE 8 EDITOR’S NOTE 9 DATEBOOK

33 SELECTING INVITATIONS

23 TIPS FOR A PERFECT DAY

35 NEW TIMES, TRADITIONS

FEATURES | 10 CHOOSE DATES WISELY |

34 MEMORABLE MUSIC 36 WHY HIRE A PLANNER 37 WEDDING PARTY ROLES

18 VENUES ABOUND IN NNY

40 FIND DEALS ON SERVICES

21 LEWIS COUNTY PLANNER

22 OVERCOME BLUNDERS

41 FIND THE RIGHT DRESS

38 ST. LAWRENCE PLANNER

26 WARM WEATHER ATTIRE

34 PLAN REHEARSAL DINNER

COVER STORY | 12 WEDDING TRENDS Northern New York brides and grooms are a trendy lot. Several experts weigh in on just how.

27 ARRANGING GUESTS

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28 DESTINATION WEDDING 30 FRESH FLOWER TIPS 32 UNIQUE CAKE FLAVORS

PHOTOGRAPHY | 43 BEST OF 2013 IN PHOTOS Five north country wedding photographers shared some of their best shots from ’13

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PLANNING | 7 NNY PLANNER |

STYLE | 23 LOOK YOUR BEST Best bridal looks for any age. |

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CONTRIBUTORS Gabrielle Hovendon is a freelance writer and former Watertown Daily Times staff writer. In our cover story, she writes about trends in Northern New York’s fastgrowing wedding industry. She also writes about hot NNY wedding venues. (pgs. 12, 18)

Katie Stokes is a blogger and freelance writer who lives in Hounsfield with her husband and two young children. She runs the blog www.nnylife.com. She writes about wedding day beauty and style and brides can find their best wedding day look. (p. 22)

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MARKETPLACE

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3D Sports ......................................................... 53 A Touch of Grace .......................................... 20 Alterations by Georgie .................................... 7 Alteri Bakery / Sackets Harbor Brewing Co... 8 Amazing Occasions ...................................... 15 Amazing Sounds DJ ....................................... 21 AMVETS Post 4 ................................................ 39 April’s Cake Shop .......................................... 15 Best Western University Inn ........................... 56 Bonnie Castle Resort ..................................... 16 Boondocks Restaurant .................................. 21 Bruce M. Wright Memorial Conference Center ........................ 2 Carbino’s Jewelry .......................................... 39 Carlowden Country Club .............................. 28 Carol Lee Shoppe........................................... 38 Center for Sight ........................................ 16, 36 Cesario Family Dental ................................... 54 Cheers Design & Event Planning .................. 38 Cindy’s Cake Shop ........................................ 39 CJ’s Kegs Cases & More ............................... 38 Clayton Dental Office ................................... 50 Clayton Opera House ................................... 51 Clipper Inn ...................................................... 17 Coldwell Banker Realty ................................. 15 Corleone Limousine ...................................... 52 Curled Salon .................................................... 7 E L Baird Fine Jewelry .................................... 21 Europe Cakes ................................................ 49 Farrands Flowers and Event Planning .......... 39 Freight House ................................................. 38 Gardner’s Flooring & Furniture ...................... 38 GEICO ............................................................. 40 Gold Cup Farms ............................................. 25 Gran View Restaurant ................................... 39 H&S Linens ...................................................... 21 Hallett’s Florist .................................................. 9 Heidi Abbey Event Planning ......................... 21 Hilton Garden Inn ............................................ 3 Hurlbut Tent Rental ......................................... 38 Jefferson County Historical Society ............. 55 Johnny D’s ...................................................... 11 Kroniser Digital Photography ........................ 39 Kylie Pleskach Tupperware .......................... 21 Lasting Memories ........................................... 47 Laura’s Bridal .................................................. 14 Lewis County Bridal Fair .................................. 6 Lewis County Hospital.................................... 27 Lisk’s Florals .................................................... 21

Little Sisters Inn ............................................... 31 Luxury Limo Service ....................................... 39 Mary Kay Cosmetics ..................................... 11 Michael’s Restaurant ..................................... 21 Mick and Iry’s .......................................... 19, 37 Monarch Photography .................................. 42 Moule a le Cakes .......................................... 17 Natalie’s Studio .............................................. 26 NNY DJ Guy .................................................... 34 NNY Living Magazine ...................................... 9 O’Brien’s Restaurant ...................................... 26 O’Connor Printing ............................................ 7 Obsidian Custom Video ............................... 38 Painful Acres Amish Furniture ......................... 7 Party Rentals ............................................ 25, 33 Perrywinkle’s .................................................. 11 Pete’s Trattoria ............................................... 45 Pine Tree Catering Co. .................................. 46 Popcorn & More ............................................... 7 Potsdam Laundry & Drycleaners .................. 39 R & H Creations .............................................. 31 Ridge View Inn Restaurant .............................. 4 Ridge View Lodge ........................................... 4 River Day Spa and Salon .............................. 10 River Rat Designs ........................................... 38 Riveredge Resort ........................................... 28 Sahara Restaurant ......................................... 35 Savory Café ................................................... 41 Sherman Electric ............................................ 35 Sherwood Florist ............................................. 44 Siam Classic Inn ............................................ 33 Snow Ridge Ski Resort ................................... 48 Sposa Bella ..................................................... 39 Sunnycrest Flowers ........................................ 29 T&R Wines & Liquors ....................................... 38 The Antique Boat Museum .............................. 9 The Edge Hotel ................................................. 7 Thousand Islands Bridge Authority — Boldt Castle ............................... 17 Thousand Islands Winery .............................. 31 Total Eclipse Salon ......................................... 34 Traux & Sons Insurance ................................. 38 Tug Hill Vineyards .......................................... 29 Ultimate Experience Salon ........................... 38 Uncle Sam Boat Tours .................................... 22 Unique Cakes ................................................ 21 Up in Smoke BBQ ........................................... 36 Waterbury Fine Jewelers ............................... 22 White’s Flowers ............................................... 38

7th Annual

Lewis County Bridal Fair January 25th, 2014 from 10am to 3pm Ridge View Inn 6912 Bardo Rd., Lowville, NY

With Vendors In Service Areas of DJ'ing, Photography, Decorating, Photo Booth's And More! Don't Forget To Sign Up For Many Door Prizes!

Chairman of the Board John B. Johnson Jr.

Publishers

John B. Johnson Harold B. Johnson II

VP News Operations Timothy J. Farkas

Magazine Editor

Kenneth J. Eysaman

Editorial Assistant / Staff Writer Grace E. Johnston

Photography

Norm Johnston, Justin Sorensen, Jason Hunter, Melanie Kimbler-Lago, Amanda Morrison

Cover Photo

Lauren Harrienger

Director of Advertising Michael Hanson

Magazine Advertising Manager Matthew Costantino

Ad Graphics, Design

Brian Mitchell, Heather O’Driscoll, Scott Smith, Todd Soules, Rick Gaskin

Circulation Director Mary Sawyer

NNY Living Weddings is published twice a year by Northern New York Newspaper Corp., 260 Washington St., Watertown, NY 13601, a Johnson Newspaper Corp. company. © 2014. All material submitted to NNY Living Weddings becomes property of Northern New York Newspaper Corp., publishers of the Watertown Daily Times, and will not be returned.

Subscription Rates Two issues are $6 a year and four issues are $12 for two years. Call 315-782-1000 for delivery. Submissions Send all editorial correspondence to keysaman@wdt.net Advertising For advertising rates and information in Jefferson and Lewis counties, email mcostantino@wdt.net, or call 661-2305 In St. Lawrence County, e-mail bward@ogd.com, or call 661-2507 Printed with pride in U.S.A. at Vanguard Printing LLC, Ithaca, N.Y. a Forest Stewardship Certified facility. Please recycle this magazine.


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EDITOR’S NOTE

Wedding industry is big business

W

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e are pleased to introduce NNY Living Weddings magazine with this, our premier issue. In this and in future editions, you will find insightful features aimed at helping brides and grooms plan for their special day. A few months ago, when our staff was considering a special weddings edition of NNY Living magazine, we were sure that we were on to something good. To our great pleasure and surprise, advertisers responded with an overwhelming level of support. Nearly 100 businesses from across Jefferson, St. Lawrence and Lewis counties appear this issue. We are proud to offer each of them a means to connect with consumers in one of the fastest-growing industries in Northern New York. A year ago, while compiling information for the 2013 economic outlook issue of our sister publication, NNY Business

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magazine, we asked Gary S. DeYoung, executive director of the 1000 Islands International Tourism Council, what industry he expected to see continued success Ken Eysaman in for the upcoming year. His answer: Weddings. “The weddings industry will continue to grow, and that will be huge. It impacts hotel stays and the wineries and other industries in the area,” Mr. DeYoung said. Given the humbling response by advertisers, I’d say that Mr. DeYoung was right on target. It has also helped convince us that a weddings magazine is something Northern New York readers will look forward to, which is why

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we plan to publish a second edition in August, in advance of the fall weddings season. As a north country native, I have no doubt that ours is an area that will see the weddings industry continue to grow and thrive, especially as more venues like Watertown’s Hilton Garden Inn open, and existing ones, like Bonnie Castle Resort renovate and offer better-than-ever services to local and guest clientele. I welcome your feedback on our first issue. As you flip through the pages of this magazine, jot down a few notes and email me at keysaman@wdt.net. Without your suggestions we won’t be able to deliver an even better edition in the summer. Meanwhile, stay warm and enjoy the magazine. Warm regards,

Now Hosting Waterfront Wedding Parties and Rehearsal Dinners

Sackets Harbor Brewing Co. 212 West Main Street Sackets Harbor, NY • 646-2739

www.sacketsharborbrewpub.com


D AT E B O O K The following bridal shows are scheduled for the tri-county area:

Jefferson County // NNY Bridal Showcase WHAT: The NNY Bridal Showcase is a

place for brides and bridal professionals to meet and discuss wedding plans and get inspired. The show features many of Northern New Yorks best businesses in the bridal industry, offering the chance for: n A fun day with family, friends and your wedding party to help check off items on your wedding to-do list n Special offers from select vendors available only at the show n Samples of cake and food n A spectacular fashion show n Style and beauty tips from local salons and vendors

WHERE: Watertown’s Dulles

State Office Building WHEN: Jan. 5, 11 a.m.-4 p.m. INFORMATION: Judith Mead, (315) 2987373, show co-founder, or co-host Tim Sweeney, general manager, WBLH Radio,

TUNES 9.25 FM, (315) 786-0925

St. Lawrence County // Best Western PLUS University Inn Bridal Show WHAT: Up to two dozen vendors will

be on hand to help plan your perfect wedding day in the St. Lawrence region. Vendors include bridal shops, photographers, DJs, commercial press for invitations, event planners, retailers like BonTon, and tent rentals.

WHO: Free and Open to the public WHEN: Feb. 16, 11 a.m.-2 p.m. WHERE: The Best Western Plus University Inn, 90 E. Main St., Canton INFORMATION: Leland Farnsworth, catering manager, (315) 386-8522

Lewis County // 7th Annual Lewis County Bridal Show

photographers, decorators, florists, DJ services, location venues, personal grooming and many more.

WHEN: Jan 25th, 2014, 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. WHERE: Ridgeview Inn, Lowville WHY: Brides could easily take care of

and book many details for their weddings in this one-day event. The fair is produced by All Things Beautiful Photography and R&H Creations, both Lewis county-based businesses. INFORMATION: Connie Noftsier, (315) 346-6915 or Helen Johnson (315) 376-2951.

Wedding Bouquets, Boutonnières, and Table Arrangements Serving All Your Wedding Floral Needs

WHAT:Features taste-testing, a large variety of vendors, including catering, cakes,

FRESH CUT FLOWERS & FLOWERS FOR ALL OCCASIONS

allett’s Florist

8883 US Rt. 11, Adams, NY 13605

(315)232-2000

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F E AT U R E S

Choose your wedding date wisely

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any couples find themselves bombarded with questions the moment they become engaged, and perhaps no questions is more common than, “When is the wedding?” Although a number of couples would prefer to bask in the excitement of their engagement, some couples feel pressured to rush into picking a wedding date. Choosing a wedding date without giving it much consideration may make things more difficult down the road. Rather than jumping head first into any decisions, couples should give thought to any and all dates and decide if there are certain times of the year they want to tie the knot or avoid.

SEASON

When thinking about potential wedding dates, it helps to have a place to start. Some couples find it helpful to start with a particular season and then narrow it down from there. Decide if you prefer the lush

greenery of summer or the amazing color spectrum of an autumn afternoon. Perhaps you envision arriving at the ceremony with a snow-packed landscape amid twinkling holiday lights? Think about the season when you feel most happy and then determine if that time of year is doable.

MONTH

Certain months may seem perfect, but not for busy professionals or those with limited vacation time at their disposal. For example, early spring may not be good for accountants tallying year-end numbers. Teachers may feel most comfortable tying the knot in the summer when they already have days off. If you run a pool business or a lawn maintenance company, then the summer might not be so good. Keep these factors in mind.

HOLIDAYS

Some people would like to tie their wedding day to a particular holiday. Valentine’s Day is popular for weddings

thanks to the romantic sentiments synonymous with the holiday, while some couples prefer Halloween or Christmas weddings. Holiday weddings can be exciting, but they also produce significant obstacles that couples who choose to get married during other times of year don’t have to worry about. Guests may not want to travel or spend time away from their families to attend a holiday wedding. Having a wedding during a holiday may mean competing for vendors and reception spaces. Prices on everything from food to flowers to airline tickets could be higher as vendors cash in on customer demand.

DAY OF THE WEEK

It’s less expensive for couples to get married on Fridays and Sundays than Saturday afternoons or evenings. Couples may think that the money saved will be well worth it, but they also should think about how this decision may affect their guests. A Friday wedding requires people to take off from work or school. Sunday weddings

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ANY WEDDING SERVICE

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F E AT U R E S may be slightly more convenient, but those who have to get back to work on Monday may be tired from late-night festivities. Couples should anticipate some guests not making it to their weddings when those weddings are not on Saturdays.

RELIGIOUS CONSTRAINTS

Couples having religious ceremonies should consult with their houses of worship as to which dates are acceptable. Some will not have weddings on days of religious observation. It is wise to consult with a church, synagogue or mosque before booking any other components of the wedding so that you are certain your chosen day is acceptable.

Senior Sales Director

ANY AVAILABLE DATES

Your wedding date may be dictated by your caterer or wedding hall. If you have a particular venue in mind, you may be limited by their availability. This is a concession you will need to make if your heart is set on this particular location. Planning a wedding can be exciting. But the ball cannot get rolling until couples first choose the day they will tie the knot. — WMS

Located in the Paddock Arcade Downtown Watertown (315) 782-6108

Weddings, Graduations, Picnics, Funeral Dinners, Rehearsal Dinners, Hail and Fairwell Functions, Office Parties, Birthday Parties DINE-IN • TAKE-OUT DELIVERY • CATERED EVENTS Visit Johnny D’s on Facebook CHECK OUT THE POSSIBILITIES! Real Food for Real People. Fancy or Casual.

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CATERING FOR YOUR EVERY NEED! No Job Too Small!

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Connor Scanlon Lehman was married last summer in Sackets Harbor. PHOTO BY LAUREN HARRIENGER


new

Trends for

modern nuptials FROM WEB-BASED RESOURCES TO PHOTO BOOTHS AND NEW TAKES ON OLD CLASSICS, WEDDINGS ARE TRADITIONS IN THE MAKING AS CREATIVITY SOARS WHEN TYING THE KNOT

IS IT CLASSY OR PASSÉ? IN VOGUE or worn out? When planning their wedding, brides and grooms often want to know what’s fashionable and what’s not. Now several north country planners, vendors and brides weigh in on the latest wedding trends. n

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One of the most popular trends in contemporary weddings is also one of the newest: the use of technology. From online RVSPs to slideshows of the bride and groom, more and more couples are turning to technology to supplement their ceremonies, receptions and planning processes. For example, recent bride Amanda M. Beach said she consulted websites

like Pinterest, which allows users to share photos of wedding inspirations, and Weddingbee, which allows bridesto-be to chat online. At her Boldt Castle wedding this July, she also used a free app called WedPics that allowed photographs to be uploaded, categorized and shared among the guests. (Other apps, including Capsule, Cake Face, Appily Wed and GuestShots offer similar services.) “Basically, if guests took a picture they could upload the picture into ‘ceremony’ or ‘reception’ or other categories, which was helpful,” Mrs. Beach explained. “That way I didn’t have to say ‘send me all your pictures,’ and everyone could see the photos right away.” In addition to finding wedding ideas

online, many brides are using the Internet to organize everything from venues and guest lists to food and thank yous. Online apps such as The Knot Ultimate Wedding Planner, Wedding Wire and My Dream Wedding allow couples to coordinate their plans on their phones, a method Mrs. Beach said is “much easier than the old-school way, where you’re doing the book by hand.” Another recent technological trend is the resurgence of the old-fashioned photo booth. Photographs can be printed on the spot, and guests can pose with the bride and groom for a keepsake of the event. “The wedding photo booth is not (we repeat not!) going away anytime soon,” said go-to wedding website The Knot. “In fact, it has become more of a recep-

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BY GABRIELLE HOVENDON | NNY LIVING WEDDINGS

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tion staple than a come-and-go wedding trend.” Recent bride and north country native Elizabeth I. VanSlyke found a local vendor, Cheryl Trevo’s Perfectly Pictured Photobooth in Carthage, to provide the photo booth for her October wedding at Fort Drum’s Commons. A typical wedding package from Perfectly Pictured includes free setup, an attendant, copies of the photos for guests and hosts and props ranging from wigs and masks to feather boas and sunglasses. “It wasn’t like your typical booth where you could fit four people maxi-

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mum,” said Mrs. VanSlyke, who was married in October at Fort Drum Commons. “It was a setup where you could fit fifteen people, and they had hundreds of props. It was pretty impressive. People seemed to love it.” n

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While technological innovations have changed some aspects of modern weddings, other aspects remain the same. “Food in general is very, very important,” said Terri M. Norris, owner and designer of Happily Ever After Florist & Bridal in Hammond. “Couples want the

guests to be happy with the food. They don’t scrimp there.” According to Mrs. Norris, many couples are now offering food stations rather than the traditional sit-down dinner: perhaps a “breads and spreads” station with cheese and dipping sauces, a carving station, a salad or pasta bar and a dessert station or candy buffet. While this approach doesn’t necessarily save money, Mrs. Norris pointed out, it allows guests to be more social. Still other couples are combining the station approach with the traditional reception. For example, although the VanSlykes offered guests a sit-down dinner in the ballroom at Fort Drum’s Commons, they also offered a separate hors d’oeuvres hour with tables of jumbo shrimp cocktail, spinach and artichoke dip, scallops and a fruit and cheese platter. “The guests could get beverages and mingle, with some of the hors d’oeuvres passed and some just set out on tables,” Mrs. VanSlyke said. “I think it worked really well. It made going into the actual ballroom more exciting.” Regardless of the style of reception, though, the wedding cake remains center stage. With the recent emergence of gourmet cake recipes, online retailers are offering confections such Vietnamese cinnamon and chocolate cakes with hazelnut praline and cappuccino buttercream and pear cakes with blackberry and white chocolate buttercream. For her wedding, Mrs. VanSlyke ordered a four-tier cake from Europe Cakes in Watertown: a layer each of vanilla coconut cake, carrot cake with cream cheese frosting, chocolate cake with a raspberry filling and red velvet cake with a peanut butter filling. She supplemented the elaborate display cake with sheet cakes for the nearly 240 guests, a common and economical choice. April L. Johnson, owner of April’s Cake Shop in Watertown, agreed that locals are moving away from traditional white cakes, opting instead for almond, lemon or chocolate cakes with fruit fillings. Mrs. Johnson also sees many couples choosing fondant and candy flowers over the traditional frosting and cake toppers of their parents’ generation. “Fondant over the last couple of years has been really popular,” she said. “It gives the cake a really flawless, flat sheen.”


Some brides are introducing not only different flavors but also different ingredients in their cakes. Mrs. VanSlyke had a small gluten-free cake (lemon with buttercream frosting and coconut) made for herself and several gluten-free guests at the wedding. “A lot of brides are throwing in gluten-free cupcakes on the side,” Mrs. Johnson said about requests for special diets. “Other people want it completely nut free.” One thing that has fallen out of fashion, however, is freezing slices of the original wedding cake. Because of the popularity of fondant, which does not keep well, and the tendency of modern freezers to fluctuate in temperature, many couples are now ordering new anniversary cakes instead. “People aren’t saving their cake anymore like they used to,” Mrs. Johnson said. “After a year, your cake does have more of a risk of being frostbitten.” n

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Watertown: 315-788-4444 Carthage: 315-493-7000 Toll Free: 888-564-1780

Congratulations to all the Brides & Grooms! www.ColdwellBanker.com • www.Rimada.com Rimada Realty 1063C Arsenal Street Watertown, NY 13601

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JANUARY 2014 | NN Y LIVING WEDDINGS

When it comes to wedding decorations, simple styles are prevailing this season. “Most brides are being much more frugal with their money,” Mrs. Norris explained. “They’re finding that in order to afford the destination wedding, they might cut corners in other areas, including the decorating. They’re wanting the venue rather than the décor to be dazzling.” As a result, Mrs. Norris said, fewer brides are turning to tulle and Christmas lights to decoration their receptions, and many are opting for simpler centerpieces and table decorations as well. Glass mason jars decorated with raffia, burlap or lace and filled with simple flowers have emerged as particularly popular centerpieces over the last few years. According to Emily L. Bush, owner of Emily’s Flower Shop in Gouverneur, couples are also cutting back on decorating their ceremony venues. “People aren’t going all out for church decorations,” Mrs. Bush said. “It’s one way to keep the cost down, doing away with the big altar bouquets.” According to Mrs. Bush and Mrs. Norris, this simple, frugal approach is extending even beyond the venue decorations: Brides are now choosing simple,

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hand-tied bouquets in lieu of the oldfashioned cascading bouquets in large holders. Many are also customizing these bouquets with personal effects, including ribbons, brooches, buttons, rhinestones, photographs and handkerchiefs. “I actually did a couple of weddings this summer where I incorporated items the brides had brought in themselves, sentimental things that had belonged to their grandmothers like handkerchiefs and maybe even a pendant,” Mrs. Bush said. “I even did a wedding this summer with old-fashioned skeleton keys on the bouquets.” Although not in the majority, some brides are going one step further and skipping the real flowers altogether. Mrs. Beach, whose relative provided silk flowers for her ceremony, was pleased with her decision to avoid large, expensive floral arrangements. “I just felt it was easier because I didn’t have to worry about ordering special flowers and being five hours away from the location,” she said. “I also got to save my bouquet, and it looks exactly the same as on the day of my wedding.”

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Last but not least, the dress. According to CNN, the average cost of a bridal gown in the United States last year was $1,211. With recent shows such as “Say Yes to the Dress” and “Something Borrowed, Something New” highlighting the industry’s variety of colors, styles, fabrics and embellishments, choosing a dress has become a daunting task. Luckily, dress fashions are moving towards the casual and the comfortable. With groomsmen increasingly leaving the tuxedos at home and brides turning to bejeweled flip-flops and cowboy boots, everyone from the guests to the happy couple are kicking back in relaxed style. “The brides aren’t as bent on perfection as they have been in previous years,” said Kathleen B. Lettiere, owner of A Touch of Grace gown shop in Watertown. “They’re not so particular about matching, and they’re not so particular about having everyone wearing the same dress. I think in general they’re a little more relaxed and mellow. I haven’t seen a bridezilla in a very long time.” According to Vogue magazine, shorter


GABRIELLE HOVENDON is a former Watertown Daily Times reporter and a freelance writer. Contact her at ghovendon@gmail.com

CLIPPER INN Restaurant opens in April for the season

CATERING • BARTENDING QUALITY & CONSISTENCY

"Bring the Clipper Inn to Your Wedding" 315.686.3842

CLAYTON, NY

BOLDT CASTLE and Boldt Yacht House

Since the Thousand Islands Bridge Authority acquired the Heart Island Properties, they have been pleased to offer this very special site for wedding ceremonies. Call 315-482-2501 for further information or visit our website at www.boldtcastle.com

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JANUARY 2014 | NN Y LIVING WEDDINGS

and simpler wedding gowns, including tea-length styles, have become more popular in recent years. Pink and gray wedding dresses, although still somewhat rare, are also becoming more widespread this year. Mrs. Lettiere noted that casual styles are being substituted for the traditional princess look in the north country, with tiaras being replaced with headbands and cathedral veils. Lace, already a popular fabric for bridal gowns, is also beginning to appear in bridesmaid dresses this year. “I’m also seeing more girls go towards shorter dresses so their maids can wear it again. It’s a little more practical,” she said. “I’m seeing ruched waistlines, so they’re a little more forgiving for all body types. People are being more conscious of everyone in the wedding party and all their figures.” Mrs. VanSlyke, who wore an ivoryover-white-gold lace dress and an elaborate comb decorated with crystals, pearls and flowers, agreed that comfort and fit were high priorities for her bridesmaids’ one-shoulder hunter green dresses. “No one ever has bridesmaids who are all the same size and shape,” she said. “I did want to make sure that I had something that was flattering for everyone.” When ordering gowns, Mrs. Lettiere advised that women allot six months for a wedding dress and twelve weeks for a bridesmaid dress. She also warned that brides should avoid choosing a dress at a bridal shop and then buying what looks like a cheap replica online, as what seems like a bargain often shows up with drastically different material, embellishments and quality of workmanship. Finally, because dresses look so different in person than on the hanger, Mrs. Lettiere advised brides to be open-minded when they arrive at the shop. “Try not to have a preconceived notion in your head, because that’s generally not what you’re going to end up with,” she said. “You’re going to try something else on and you’re going to fall in love with it. Once you start trying things on, you’re going to change your mind.”

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F E AT U R E S

The view of the Clayton Opera House seating area from its stage. Venues like the opera house have grown in popularity for weddings. AMANDA MORRISON | NNY LIVING

Wedding venues abound in NNY n From opera houses to castles, historic places and outdoors,

region offers plenty for those who want unique experience

JA NUA RY 2 01 4 | NNY L IVING W EDDIN GS

BY GABRIELLE HOVENDON

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FROM BACKYARDS TO BALLROOMS, a good wedding can be held in any location. Casual or formal, indoors or outdoors, the choices in Northern New York are abundant. In recent years, many couples are choosing to hold their ceremonies and receptions at wineries and waterfront sites in the north country. Castles are also quite popular, partly because they require little in the way of decorations. “With those venues, you don’t have to worry about turning an American Legion or a fire hall or something into a place that’s going to have any kind of ‘wow’ factor,” said Terri M. Norris, owner and designer of Happily Ever After Florist & Bridal in Hammond. “You don’t have to spend all the time

and effort on the decorating.” Indeed, Ms. Norris said that destination weddings to north country castles are becoming increasingly popular, with brides and grooms cutting back on their guest lists and opting to travel instead. However, it’s important for couples to choose the site that best suits their taste, be it a mansion or a tent. When picking a wedding venue, planners recommend that couples first and foremost calculate additional expenses, including transportation and admission. “They should keep in mind the hidden costs,” Ms. Norris said. “Make sure that they do get an accurate account of what their expenses are going to be.” Online experts at websites from Bridal Musings to the Huffington Post agree, listing several other important consider-

ations: the number of guests that can be accommodated at the venue of choice, the number of other weddings that will be held there on the same day, the privacy at and ease of access to the site, and the range of amenities that will be provided. In the north country, it’s also wise to check the availability of hotels on dates when big events are being held — Bill Johnston’s Pirate Days in Alexandria Bay and the Can-Am Festival in Sackets Harbor, for example. With a little careful planning, that dream wedding can be achieved without hassle and close to home.

CASTLES

For brides and grooms who dream of a fairytale wedding, what better place to get married than a castle? The Thousand Islands offer several options for royal treatment.


F E AT U R E S n At Singer Castle on Dark Island, weddings can be held in the rose garden, the covered pergola, the lawns, or the terrace leading into the great hall. Couples who are married at Singer Castle have the opportunity of spending the night in the Royal Suite with catered meals. For $350 an hour and $15 per guest, the castle can be booked any day of the week from May through October. n At Boldt Castle on Heart Island, weddings and vow renewals are held in the gazebo at the foot of the Alster Tower on Saturdays from mid-June to mid-September. Although the castle does not host receptions, it includes seating, changing rooms, and other amenities in the booking price: $200 plus the price of at least fifty admission tickets. n Casa Blanca on Cherry Island offers all the grandeur of a castle on a more intimate scale. With pump organ, player pianos, stained glass, and marble sinks, the mansion can accommodate up to 250 guests in Gilded Age style. Casa Blanca can be booked for $3,000 for the day from mid-May to late September.

week and type and size of function. n For a higher-proof venue, the Clayton Distillery is hoping to host outdoor weddings beginning in July. The microdistillery, which opened last April, features products ranging from gin, vodka and whiskey to limoncello and maple strawberry liqueur.

HISTORIC SITES

For couples seeking more gravitas, a historic site can provide elegance for their ceremonies and receptions. As with

castles, historic sites usually offer an excellent backdrop and require a minimum of decorations. n Couples seeking Victorian charm can host a wedding ceremony and reception at Watertown’s Jefferson County Historical Society. The Victorian gardens are available during the summer months and the Paddock mansion is available year-round, with accommodations for about 200 guests indoors. Prices vary by wedding. n For a more theatrical setting, wed-

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Just as small wineries have become more popular in the north country, so too have winery weddings. Local vineyards offer a number of conveniences, including a beautiful backdrop for photos and the possibility of discounted beverages for the reception. n In Jefferson County, weddings can be held at the Coyote Moon Vineyards in Clayton (June through September), the Yellow Barn Winery in Watertown (year-round, although only 25 to 40 guests can be accommodated indoors), Thousand Islands Winery in Alexandria Bay (year-round), Otter Creek Winery in Philadelphia (an outdoor pavilion accommodates up to 100 guests during spring, summer and fall months), and Venditti Vineyards in Theresa (with tentative plans to offer outdoor weddings for up to 200 people this summer). Prices vary between vineyards. n In Lewis County, Lowville’s Tug Hill Vineyards have become a popular wedding venue, hosting around 30 ceremonies and receptions each year. These weddings, which can be held year-round, include space for a ceremony on the front lawn, a cocktail hour on the patio and a reception hall with a balcony, fireplace and screened porch. Prices vary by season, day of the

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F E AT U R E S dings can be booked at the 110-year-old Clayton Opera House from September through May. Customized packages can include use of the performance hall, ballroom, third floor banquet rooms, piano and even popcorn machine. n Built in 1894, the Edwards Opera House is another prime site for elegant weddings. Ceremonies can be hosted year-round on the wooden main stage, with the theater accommodating 200 or more guests. Instead of a flat rate, the opera house asks for a donation commensurate with the size and complexity of the event. n The site of a historic battle may seem unusual for a wedding, but the Sackets Harbor Battlefield has long been a popular choice for summer ceremonies and receptions. Although weddings must finish by 7 p.m., ceremonies in the memorial tree grove and receptions by the big red barn or in the picnic pavilion offer beautiful waterfront views. Weddings range in price, with deposits accepted beginning in January.

WATER

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Opportunities for waterfront weddings abound in Northern New York. From year-round receptions at the Riveredge Resort and Bonnie Castle Resort in Alexandria Bay to seasonal ceremonies in the gazebo in the village of Sackets Harbor, there are a variety of formal and informal venues available to brides and grooms. n The Thousand Islands Club on Wellesley Island hosts upscale weddings in its Commodore Room on Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays from June through September. Near Boldt Castle, the club is accessible by boat and car and overlooks

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At Rock Island Lighthouse, a few miles northeast of Clayton, couples can be married from Memorial Day to Labor Day. JOHNSON NEWSPAPERS FILE PHOTO

the St. Lawrence River. Fees vary by package, which can include customized menus, a chocolate fountain and more. n At the Antique Boat Museum in Clayton, couples can rent an indoor space, an open-air porch, a large tent or the yacht house docks for their reception, and ceremony space is available on the museum’s lawn. The museum also rents its antique runabout Hackercraft, Miss Thousand Islands II, for use by the bride and groom or guests. n For truly nautical nuptials, couples can leave terra firma and cruise the St. Lawrence River during their ceremony or reception. Uncle Sam Boat Tours offers cocktail or dinner receptions for up to 200 guests, while Clayton Island Tours offers space for small ceremonies or rehearsal dinners. Prices vary by package.

UNUSUAL LOCATIONS

For couples seeking something out of the ordinary, Northern New York offers a few venues off the beaten path.

n At Rock Island Lighthouse, a few miles northeast of Clayton, couples can be married from Memorial Day to Labor Day. The island, which is accessible by boat, can accommodate up to 50 guests during the day and up to 100 guests during the evening. Although the lighthouse and lantern are not accessible, wedding packages include access to dock slips, a bridal room and the keeper’s quarters. n Champagne Balloon Adventures, based in Alexandria Bay, hosts several hot air balloon weddings each year. Weddings are available from mid-April to mid-October and, while weather dependent, are also very customizable. One balloon can accommodate four guests and another can accommodate six, with rides costing $195 per person. GABRIELLE HOVENDON is a former Watertown Daily Times reporter and a freelance writer. Contact her at ghovendon@gmail.com

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F E AT U R E S

Overcome wedding day blunders BY GABRIELLE HOVENDON HURRICANES. HEART CONDITIONS. Lost luggage. Drunken toasts. From blunders and bloopers to near disasters, wedding planners can list their share of wedding horror stories. Luckily, they also have a few tips to avoid them. “We’ve had mishaps where there’s been an extremely windy day that’s almost hurricane weather,” said Terri M. Norris, owner and designer of Happily Ever After Florist & Bridal in Hammond. “They’ve been stranded on one of the islands and have had to wait until the end of the day for us to boat them back.” Experts recommend that all couples have a contingency plan for any event that’s even remotely weather dependent, especially ones located on or near the water. Indeed, The Huffington Post details stories about natural disasters from dust storms to tornadoes that have spoiled otherwise perfect weddings. Even so, rain might not be the most inimical liquid at a wedding party. According to Mrs. Norris, the majority of wedding mishaps — from groomsmen attempting

pole dancing to DJs carrying inebriated brides off boats — can be blamed on one drink too many. “As far as alcohol, an open bar isn’t all it’s cracked up to be,” Mrs. Norris said. “Have some restrictions on that, and always keep safety in mind, especially when you’re on islands and boats.” Wedding website The Knot lists further mishaps, including collapsed cakes, ill-fitting dresses and allergic reactions. Wedding insurance companies cite further problems, from ice storms and car accidents to lost rings and dresses catching on fire, and many experts believe couples should purchase wedding insurance no matter what. At least one common mishap is easy to avoid, though. Mrs. Norris says it’s important for couples to remember that New York State requires marriage licenses to be obtained at least 24 hours in advance of the ceremony. She recalls one couple who remembered their license at the last minute only to have to speed from Alexandria Bay to Watertown to find an office open on a holiday weekend. “Believe it or not, there are some younger

couples out there who do not know that they actually have to get a license to get married,” Mrs. Norris said. “They do need a marriage license. There are regulations involved.” In the end, it’s good to keep a brave face when even the best-laid plans go awry. Mrs. Norris recounts one memorable incident when the bride’s father got a bloody nose and had to change his clothes right before the ceremony. Unfortunately, he forgot to reattach his suspenders, and as he walked his daughter down the aisle his pants slid down to his ankles. “The bride had to pick up one side of his pants — she was trying to hang onto his pants with one hand and her bouquet with the other — and he was hanging on to the other,” Mrs. Norris said. Somehow, the bride kept smiling through it all, and by the reception the incident had gone from horrifying to hilarious. “Everyone afterwards roared about it. They took it all into stride.” GABRIELLE HOVENDON is a former Watertown Daily Times reporter and a freelance writer. Contact her at ghovendon@gmail.com

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STYLE

Best bridal looks for any age BY KATIE STOKES JENNY BACH, OWNER OF RIVER DAY SPA AND SALON, Clayton, and her team of stylists have helped brides from across Northern New York achieve their dream looks for their

wedding days. For our beauty photo spread, Mrs. Bach came up with four distinct bridal looks for four women of ages ranging from young to mature.

The natural beauty Katie Machia

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or a bridal look that won’t overshadow natural beauty, Ms. Bach styled model Katie Machia with a look that emphasizes an “organic,” natural look.

HAIR: Stylist Carrie Lashomb gave Katie long, loose, “undone”

curls, then finished with an anti-humidity spray. “Anti-humidity spray holds hair in place, gives a nice shine, and eliminates frizz,” Ms. Bach said, who recommends A.G. Hair Cosmetics Smooth Frizz-Proof Anti-Humidity Spray.

MAKE-UP: For Katie’s make-up, River Day Spa & Salon stylist

and make-up artist Kate Ebbing chose to give her a flawless base and light, earth-toned make-up with a clear-sheen lip gloss.

The stunner Jenny Bach

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or a look that heightens natural beauty with small, but dazzling details, Ms. Bach chose a style she calls “The stunner.”

HAIR: Her piece-y bangs soften her forehead, and leaving her

hair down gives an elegant and sexy style. Hair stylist Carrie Lashomb gave Ms. Bach a medium-sized curl, and her highlights give the look dimension and texture. The finishing touch was the set of diamond hair clips for to add some sparkle.

MAKE-UP: Kate Ebbing chose a pronounced lip with high-

shine lip gloss, and false eyelashes, which enhance the eyes in a way that looks more natural than extra mascara. With emphasis on lips and eyes, she chose to downplay Ms. Bach’s cheekbones with a light blush. NAILS: Ms. Bach’s nails were left naturally shaped, and Kate Ebbing added a little extra sparkle to her nails for a dazzling, but fresh look.

JEWELRY: Courtesy Waterbury Jewelers, Watertown. CONTINUED ON PAGE 24

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JEWELRY: Courtesy Waterbury Jewelers, Watertown.

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STYLE

Discover your best bridal look CONTINUED FROM PAGE 23

Elegant, timeless beauty Terra Thomas

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here’s no way to describe this look except as elegant and timeless,” Ms. Bach said.

HAIR: Ms. Bach styled Terra’s hair with a shine pomade to help smooth this classic up-do, which she achieved by adding dry shampoo, then teasing her hair back into a sleek bun.

MAKE-UP: Kate Ebbing chose smoky and defined eye make-up

Flawless finish Marie Ebbing

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or Marie, Ms. Bach chose a look with softness and that doesn’t come off as overdone. Some mature brides tend to try and go “too young,” and overdo their make-up and hair, Ms. Bach said. “You want something age-appropriate.”

HAIR: Ms. Bach gave Marie a style with defined, full curls, which help create a soft and uplifting look.

MAKE-UP: Kate Ebbing chose a lighter look on Marie’s eyes

with a soft pink-accented cheek and glossy lips. Simple and fresh make-up tends to make eyes look more bright and open, Ms. Bach said.

JEWELRY: Ms. Bach used pearls from Waterbury Jewelers in

Watertown in Marie’s look because “they’re not too flashy. You can’t go wrong with pearls.”

with a white highlight on Terra’s inner eye. Her fair skin got a punch-up with rosy blush and a pronounced, high-gloss lip to make the look a total classic.

NAILS: The touch of sparkle on Terra’s nails was achieved with a shiny clear polish, and an ivory-tipped nail with a scatter of glitter.

JEWELRY: To play up the classic look and put emphasis on

Terra’s platinum engagement ring, Jenny chose this simple and elegant necklace and earring set from Waterbury Jewelers in Watertown. “We could have just as easily gone with pearls — they’re a classic,” said Jenny. “This style would be perfect with a beautiful lace dress.” Jewelry courtesy of Waterbury Jewelers.

EDITOR’S NOTE: A sincere thank-you to Jenny Bach, Carrie Lashomb, Kate Ebbing and Jackie Strough of River Day Spa & Salon, Clayton for styling hair, make-up, nails and flowers, and to Katie Machia, Terra Thomas and Marie Ebbing for modeling. Thanks also to Mark Waterbury of Waterbury Jewelers, Watertown for providing jewelry used in the photo shoot.


STYLE Jenny Bach’s Bridal styling tips 8 TO 12 WEEKS BEFORE WEDDING Invest in a series of skin treatments like microdermabrasion, or laser facials like Lumifacial to create a flawless skin tone and a natural glow. “Make-up goes on smoother because you’ll have fewer dead skin cells,” Ms. Bach said. If you plan to wear your hair up, consult your stylist about your hair color. Getting highlights could add dimension to your look, and starting early, then maintaining your color and cut until up to two weeks before the big day will prevent any hair mishaps. Begin narrowing down hair styles, but don’t lock in on the “perfect” one. “If you are going to choose a photo out of a magazine, try to pinpoint what you like about the style. Not every hair type will be work for that style,” Ms. Bach said. 4 TO 6 WEEKS BEFORE WEDDING Let your stylist know what look you’re going for. Whatever you choose should be something that enhances your wedding dress. “You don’t want something too matchy-matchy,” Ms. Bach pointed out. “You don’t want your look to detract from the dress. You want a style that adds polish and texture.” TWO WEEKS BEFORE WEDDING Get your final color and cut before your wedding day. “I always tell brides not to make any drastic changes right before the wedding,” Ms. Bach said. If you are wearing a veil, a tiara, or any other embellishments, bring those, along with your jewelry to do a trial run for hair and make-up.

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DAY BEFORE WEDDING Whether you’re wearing your hair up or down, wash your hair the day before — not the day of — your wedding. “We use dry shampoo to help absorb any oils off the scalp,” Ms. Bach said. Not washing your hair on the day of the wedding might seem counter-intuitive, Ms. Bach said, but your hair will have more shine, and your stylist will be able to work with hair more easily if it’s not squeaky clean. Stay away from salty foods. Ms. Bach said not a lot of people think of this; they indulge at their rehearsal dinners, then end up with water-weight swelling on their big day. “They wonder why their dresses are fitting so tight and their faces look puffy,” Ms. Bach said. “It happens all the time.” — Jenny Bach

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WEEK BEFORE WEDDING Get your pedicure if your toes will show in your wedding day shoes If you need any facial waxing, you should do this a few days ahead, especially if you know your skin is sensitive. Never touch the areas that have been waxed. The oil on your fingers could cause you to break out. If you feel you need a bit of a sun-kissed glow, a spray tan is the way to go. With a spray tan a few days before the wedding, you won’t need to worry about streaks, burning from tanning beds or the sun, or any other skin problems.

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F E AT U R E S

Warm weather attire for grom, attendants

W

eddings are a time to get dolled up. Though some gentlemen may be tempted to wear the suit they wear to work, a formal event necessitates something a bit more remarkable. When the weather is warm, some men may scoff at the idea of wearing a full suit or even a tuxedo. But just because a person is wearing pants and a jacket doesn’t mean the suit must be dark and heavy.

Although dark colors are traditional for weddings, dark, heavy fabrics will absorb the sun’s rays, making the groom and his groomsmen uncomfortable. Even when a warm-weather wedding takes place largely indoors where it is climate controlled, many couples choose to have the ceremony outdoors, where they pose for photographs as well. The groom and his groomsmen will want to be comfortable during these times, and the right suit and fabric can make all the difference.

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Linen and cotton are all-natural fabrics that are made from plant fibers. They are much lighter weight than wool, and linen and cotton suits may be more comfortable. But linen and cotton are highly prone to wrinkling, and a wrinkled suit will not present well in a formal setting. Cotton and linen may be best reserved for informal weddings or those that will be taking place outdoors or beachside. Seersucker suits are made from cotton in a unique weaving pattern that lets air ventilate through the material. Seersucker suits may be most popular in the southeastern United States, but they can be worn anywhere the weather is warm. Many of these suits are manufactured in a gray, blue and brown striped pattern. Again, due to the lightweight fabric, you will feel cool. For less formal weddings, a seersucker suit may fit. A khaki suit or a tan one may work better if the wedding is more formal. Ensure the accessories are in place to make this look work. The suit should fit well and be tailored appropriately. Sharp creases in the pants and a crisp shirt and tie can complete the look. If the groomsmen are in coordinating suits, a tan or khaki color will not look out of place. If a full suit still feels too stiff, a nice blazer paired with a complementary colored trouser may be appropriate for a less formal affair. Some grooms want to err on the side of caution and stick with a classic suit or tuxedo. In such instances, grooms may want to investigate lighter weight wools. Such suits won’t be as confining as a heavier suit. Grooms wearing a tuxedo may want to choose a white tuxedo. A white tuxedo will look pristine and fit with a formal theme. And the white will reflect the sun and be cooler without looking casual. A groom who does not mind a midday wardrobe change can opt to wear a standard suit or tuxedo and plan to change later on for the reception. He can coordinate with his new bride and step into something more comfortable for dancing and enjoying the ensuing party. This allows for formality when the moments call for it and comfort later on in the day. Dressing for a warm weather wedding may require a bit of ingenuity on the part of the groom. There are different fabrics and styles of suit available to present plenty of wardrobe options. — WMS


F E AT U R E S

Tips for making seating arrangements

O

close family members at these tables to ensure they have a place of prominence in the room. This usually means being close to the dance floor to have a good view of all of the festivities. If your parents are divorced or there are any other strained feelings among parents, you can further separate into another table for stepparents, to avoid any unpleasantness or confrontation. Many wedding receptions are full of friends and even coworkers of parents whom the couple tying the knot does not even know. You may need further clarification of their relationships and who gets along before seating them. In fact, ask a parent to take care of arranging their own friends so you will be certain the arrangements will be comfortable for everyone. A friends’ table is usually a mingling of friends or your own coworkers who are of similar ages. A friends’ table can make guests who arrived solo feel more comfortable because they can converse with others who are like-minded. Seating children can be tricky. You may

be inclined to seat youngsters at their own table, which is fine if the children are mature enough to handle sitting by themselves. But young children sitting apart from their parents may be nervous. Furthermore, the parents will continually have to get up and check on the kids. Very young children are best seated alongside their folks. When arranging seating, you also must consider special needs’ individuals who may have mobility issues. Such individuals should be seated near doors and restrooms so it’s easier for them to get around once the reception hits full swing. Try to accommodate special requests, like not seating the elderly too close to music speakers. Keep in mind that there is software and even some smartphone apps that make it even easier to make seating arrangements. Tech-savvy couples may prefer this method to the old-fashioned pencil and paper technique. — WMS

JANUARY 2014 | NN Y LIVING WEDDINGS

ne of the biggest decisions couples make regarding their wedding receptions concerns where to seat their guests. Many a bride and groom has felt the crunch of compiling responses and then coming up with an acceptable seating arrangement for the reception. Seating guests is not a task exclusive to brides- and grooms-to-be. Anyone holding a special party, whether it’s at a reception hall or a restaurant, must determine seating arrangements. Before you begin to make seating arrangements, you will need the entire list of people attending the event. Having a final headcount is essential. While you may want to do a seating chart early into the reception planning, it’s best left until a few weeks before your wedding day, when you know who will and will not be in attendance. Next, know the number of tables you will be alloted in the party space. A catering hall may have a set number of seats that can fit at each table and can usually provide you with a map of the room or a blank seating chart. Many standard reception tables can comfortably seat between eight to 10 people. Squeezing in more people can make for an uncomfortable dining experience. If you are a visual person, you may benefit from writing guests’ names on small pieces of paper and physically moving them around your seating chart, much as you would do if you were trying to arrange furniture on a room layout. Otherwise, write things down as you plan. When arranging the seating, figure out the head or bridal table. This is one of the easier tables to seat because it is traditionally filled with members of your bridal party and their respective spouses or dates. If your bridal party is especially large, consider flanking your own sweetheart table with two tables for the bridal party on either side. After arranging the bridal table, focus on seating parents and close relatives of the bride and groom next. Many couples prefer to separate their families at the wedding, so the groom’s family may sit on one side of the room and the bride’s family will sit on the other. This means there will be two parental tables. Consider seating grandparents or other

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F E AT U R E S

How to plan a destination wedding

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ccording to a study from XO Group Inc., creator of wedding Web sites TheKnot.com and WeddingChannel.com, 350,000 destination weddings take place annually. Such figures reflect a growing trend of couples who want to tailor their weddings to their own personalities, even if that means tying the knot in

exotic or unusual locales. But as popular as destination weddings have become, couples who have had have such weddings can attest that planning a destination wedding is not necessarily easier than planning a more traditional ceremony close to home. Though destination weddings can make for memorable affairs, there are some factors couples must consider

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when mulling whether or not to have a destination wedding.

GUEST LIST

The XO Group study found that destination weddings have an average of 86 guests. When sitting down to organize their guest lists, many couples realize they have well over 100 guests on their lists. Such couples may find a destination wedding especially difficult to pull off, as resorts may or may not be able to accommodate such a substantial number of guests. In addition, couples who hope to invite children to their weddings might want to reconsider a destination affair, as those youngsters’ parents will have to foot the bill for additional airfare and accommodations and, depending on when the wedding takes place, pull the kids out of school for an extended period of time. Couples with smaller guests list might find a destination wedding much more manageable than those whose guest lists crack triple digits. Another thing to consider is that the larger the guest list, the more likely many of those guests will not be able to afford to attend or get enough time off from work to make it to a destination wedding. Couples who want to ensure all of their loved ones can be there with them on their big days might be better off avoiding destination weddings.

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ACCESSIBILITY

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Accessibility is a common concern for couples considering destination weddings. Destination weddings typically ask guests to travel far to attend the ceremony and reception, but there are ways to make that travel less of an ordeal. When choosing a location for their destination weddings, couples should consider the cost and convenience of travel. Remote islands are not very accessible, and as a result guests will likely have to pay a pretty penny for their flights and lodging. In addition, the more remote a destination wedding locale is, the less convenient getting there figures to be. Nonstop flights likely won’t be a


F E AT U R E S possibility. Before choosing a locale for a destination wedding, research flights, making sure that affordable flights are available within spitting distance of loved ones’ homes and that they won’t have to suffer through multiple connecting flights when traveling to and from the wedding.

WEATHER

Weather is another factor couples must consider before choosing to have a destination wedding. The XO Group study found that 30 percent of American couples who have destination weddings choose to tie the knot outside of the continental United States. That’s a distinct disadvantage for couples who likely are not very familiar with weather patterns overseas. Couples who choose outdoor weddings close to home are often familiar enough with local weather patterns to choose a wedding date that likely won’t be interrupted by harsh weather. But choosing an overseas or distant locale erases that comfort level, and couples may find themselves worrying about storms or other inclement weather conditions as their wedding days draw nearer. Before choosing a locale for their destination weddings, couples should thoroughly research each potential destination’s weather patterns. Brides, grooms and guests alike don’t want to do all of that traveling only to end up indoors because it just sohappens to be tropical storm season.

COMPETITION

— WMS

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As destination weddings have grown in popularity, the competition for idyllic locales and top-notch venues has increased. That competition is great for venue owners’ bottom lines, but it might not be so great for couples looking to keep their wedding costs down. Costs might be considerably less in the offseason, but that’s also when storms and inclement weather tend to take hold, Booking a venue early can help couples mitigate some of the costs of a destination wedding, but the growing popularity of destination weddings might make them out of reach for couples working on tight budgets.

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F E AT U R E S

Fresh flowers create air of romance

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hat would a wedding day be without flowers? The beauty and the aroma of fresh-cut flowers can create a welcoming atmosphere and complement the beauty and the style of a wedding wardrobe. Flowers are often the first things that guests see upon arriving for the ceremony, and they may even be something guests take home at the end of the night. Flowers create an air of romance, and most couples want to make flowers — whether fresh or silk — an integral part of their wedding day. As with any decision when planning a wedding, choosing the right flowers requires some research and a basic knowledge of which flowers will convey the message and the theme of your wedding. The number of colors, textures and combinations that can be created are so numerous that couples may feel the decision on the floral arrangements is best left to the florist. But it doesn’t take a lot of expertise to know what you want, and it is important for couples to convey their feelings to the florist. Consider these tips when choosing a florist and selecting flowers. n Experts advise that a couple start looking for a florist at least six months before the wedding, especially if the wedding will take place during the peak season of May through September. Get recommendations from friends as to which florist they used or find out if your wedding planner or banquet hall manager recommends a particular florist. Some catering halls have agreements with florists, and they work together. n Browse magazines to get ideas of what you like. You also may be able to find a florist through an advertisement or if he or she has been featured in publications. Keep a scrapbook of the colors, types of flowers and arrangements and any other ideas that attract you so you will be able to present this information to the florist. n Establish your flower budget prior to sitting down with the florist. You should expect to pay at least 8 percent of the total wedding cost on flowers. Get

CHRIS BOVA | SPECIAL TO NNY LIVING

an estimate on the floral arrangement and then tweak your needs according to your budget. Many florists can modify arrangements and find a middle ground with regard to cost. Selecting flowers that are in-season will result in more affordable rates than if you desire exotic or out-of-season blooms. n Once you’ve hired the florist, you can come up with a wedding flower worksheet that establishes all of your needs. The florist may ask for specific information, such as photos of the bride’s gown as well as the colors and styles

that the wedding party will be wearing. A good florist knows that a bouquet should not overpower or detract from the beauty of the bride. The florist may want to mimic textures from the dress, such as beading, with smaller flowers or berries within the arrangement. The groom’s boutonniere is traditionally one of the flowers from the bride’s bouquet so that the look is cohesive. n Ceremony flowers may be traditional, and some houses of worship have strict guidelines as to what can and cannot be used. However, reception


F E AT U R E S

— WMS

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flowers can be where you show off your creativity and whimsy. After all, this is a party and it should be fun. You may want to give the florist more freedom of expression with regard to reception centerpieces and flowers that adorn other areas of the room. n Because receptions tend to take place in the evening hours and are often indoor affairs, experts say that added lighting may be needed to put emphasis on the floral centerpieces and help present them in their best light. You may want to think about hiring a lighting designer to spotlight some areas of the room or at the very least incorporate candlelight into your centerpiece arrangements. n To give the impression that there are more flowers than there really are, use fragrance and filler as your tools. Fragrant flowers can fill up the room with a welcoming aroma. Look for frangipani, lilies, hyacinths, jasmine, and sweet peas for a big impact. Florists know how to stretch arrangements by using greenery and other filler to lend bulk without too much extra cost. n Experienced florists will know how long it takes certain buds to open and show off their maximum beauty. Therefore, expect a florist to be working on your floral arrangements as much as a week before the wedding date — purchasing containers, cleaning flowers and waiting for certain ones to open fully. Minimize changes close to your wedding date as most things will already be started. n It is possible to make your own centerpieces or bouquets if you so desire. Simplicity will work best for the novice. Think about grouping similar-hued calla lilies together for a bridal bouquet. Hydrangea and peonies are larger flowers that can easily fill up a vessel on a table as a centerpiece. White flowers will coordinate with any color scheme and could be the easiest to mix and match. White blooms include sweet pea, rose, camellia, stephanotis, narcissus, gardenia, orchid, lily of the valley, jasmine, and gypsophila. Flowers are one component of the wedding that will help achieve the magic and beautiful atmosphere couples desire.

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F E AT U R E S

Explore unique cake combinations

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wedding cake is the piece de resistance of the wedding ceremony. Guests anxiously await the unveiling of the cake near the end of the festivities. Modern cakes are showpieces grander in scale than in years past. As bakers and confectioners hone their skills with fondant, buttercream and gum paste even further, the results are often impressive, awe-inspiring cake designs. While the look of a wedding cake is certainly important, cakes should not only look good, but taste good as well. Vanilla cake with vanilla buttercream frosting was once the gold standard. But today’s couples are being more adventurous with their wedding cakes and winning rave reviews from guests along the way. The vast scope of wedding cake flavor choices available to brides and grooms is astonishing. Options may range from the traditional to something adventurous and daring. Keeping in mind that couples will need to please the masses, finding a compromise between plain vanilla and a mocha-chile-coconut surprise is essential. Otherwise, they risk an unpopular flavor and a lot of wasted, expensive cake. Some couples shy away from more adventurous cakes because they fear something chocolately or not white in color will not be well suited to a wedding reception. Such couples should keep in mind that any flavor of cake can be hidden beneath layers of pearly white fondant or royal icing. Therefore, the sky is the limit with regard to flavor combinations. Those who might want to veer from tradition can consider these clever cake combinations. n Lemon cake with vanilla buttercream: Lemons are tart, juicy and refreshing, helping to cleanse the palate after a rich meal. Lemon cake, with its summery feel, is tailor-made for summer weddings. The flavor is popular enough to appeal to many, but just a little different to add an unexpected zip of flavor. n Chocolate cake with chocolate ganache and mocha filling: True chocoholics will be hard-pressed to resist such a decadent flavor profile. Chocolate can be sweet and satisfying and a welcome change from the vanilla cakes commonly served. For traditionalists, the cake can be covered with a white chocolate ganache. Or couples can ask that the cake be adorned with white sugar roses for an

There are a wide range of options when it comes time to select a wedding cake. This cake is from April’s Cake Shop on Watertown’s Public Square. AMANDA MORRISON | NNY LIVING

eye-appealing contrast. Chocolate cakes covered with autumn hued flowers go over well at fall weddings. n Red velvet cake with cream cheese frosting: Red velvet cake was once a regionally specific staple, but now has grown steadily in popularity across the country. Red velvet has quickly become the new classic, as its vibrant red coloring offers a shock of something different, while the flavor is mild for those who are not comfortable taking risks. The richness and creaminess of cream cheese is irresistible. n White cake with chocolate mousse: Couples who want a bit of chocolate but do not want to be overwhelmed can select a white cake that is filled with light and rich chocolate mousse. It’s the perfect blend of vanilla and chocolate for guests who enjoy both.

n Variety tiers: Those who cannot settle on just one flavor can have different flavors on each tier of their cakes. This gives guest some flavorful variety and enables them to pick their favorite flavor combination. Brides- and grooms-to-be who have specific flavors in mind can ask their bakers to include two cupcakes with the wedding cake. Then the couple can enjoy their own mini cakes while the rest of the guests enjoy a more classic cake. In addition, an assortment of cupcakes in lieu of one cake can give guests the opportunity to sample several different flavors. Cakes are a part of many special events, but few cakes are fawned over as much as wedding cakes. Couples can spice things up by choosing a nontraditional flavor combination. — WMS


F E AT U R E S

Wedding invitations offer ‘first glimpse’

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ing the date or the location because they cannot read the writing on the invitation. Steer clear of pastel or yellow text colors, and remember to have a high contrast between the color of the invitation and the text you are using for easy reading. n Keep the invitation simple. It may be tempting to load the invitation with lots of information, but all you really need are the key pieces of information, such as the “who,” “what,” “where,” and “when.” Crowding the card will take away from its aesthetic appeal. Most stationers will suggest a separate, smaller insert in the wedding invitation for the reception information and response card. Never put information such as where you are registered or “no kids allowed.” This is material better reserved for word of mouth or on a wedding Web site. n Do some math. It is important to know your dates so you can receive the invitations on time, mail them out, and give guests enough time to respond. A good rule of thumb is to mail out the invitations at least two months before the wedding. Have an RSVP date of no

more than three to four weeks before the wedding, giving ample time to the caterers and accommodating anyone who procrastinates in sending in a response. You will need the final headcount in order to confirm seating arrangements and plan for centerpieces and favors. n Handwrite the envelopes. Your invitation will look more impressive if you address them by hand, rather than printing them off of a computer. If your handwriting is not very neat, consider hiring a professional calligrapher to write out your envelopes. * Make it easy for guests to respond. Be sure to place a stamp on the response card envelope and have that envelope already addressed with your home address so that guests will have no excuses not to mail a response back promptly. n Always order extra. Mistakes happen, and you may need to send out a few extra invitations that you hadn’t originally counted. Always order extra invitations just to be on the safe side. And don’t forget you will probably want to keep one as a keepsake for yourself. — WMS

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edding invitations often provide guests with a first glimpse of a wedding’s style. Invitations also may serve as the means by which distant friends and relatives find out about a couple’s pending nuptials if a formal announcement was not made. Amid the flourishes of calligraphy and impressive paper stock is information that speaks to the importance of the day when two people will be joining their lives together. Guests will learn not only the time and the place of the wedding from the invitation, but also the formality of the event and the scope of the party that will follow. Couples should keep certain things in mind as they begin to design their wedding invitations. n Have a good idea of your potential guest list. Before shopping for wedding invitations, it is key to have a strong idea of just how big the wedding will be and how many guests will be invited. This way you will know how many invitations you will need. Invitations vary in price, so cost may be a consideration if your guest list is extensive. n Decide on the formality of the wedding. Will you be hosting a black tie affair, or will it be a casual gathering at the shore? Guests infer many things about the wedding from the invitations, which should match the formality of the event in style and the sentiments expressed. An ornate invitation written with classic wording suggests a more formal affair, while a whimsical invitation with less formal wording could indicate a more laid-back event. n Dare to be different by playing with invitation sizes and shapes. Rectangular cards are standard for wedding invitations, but you can explore your creativity by choosing more modern, artsy invitations. Circular invites or scalloped edges can add some whimsy to the wedding mood. Invitations that fold out or are embellished with ribbon or other decorations can be appealing. Just keep in mind that cards that are not the standard shape and size could be more costly to send. Always have the entire wedding invitation weighed and priced at the post office so you will know what the postage will cost. n Choose a legible font and text color. Your invitation may look beautiful, but it may prove ineffective if it is difficult to read. Do not risk guests misinterpret-

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F E AT U R E S

How to approach wedding day music

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usic often plays an important role on festive occasions, and wedding days are no exception. The right music can make a wedding day that much more meaningful, while the wrong music can make a couple’s big event memorable for all the wrong reasons. Though music selection might seem like one of the easier decisions couples must make, those about to tie the knot typically must make a host of music-related decisions regarding their wedding day, including whether to choose a live band or a deejay to perform at their wedding receptions. While the reception is when music might be most on display, couples planning their weddings must think beyond the reception when setting the musical tones for their weddings.

CEREMONY

The ceremony itself often sets the tone for a couple’s wedding day. A beach wedding, for example, often creates a laid back atmosphere, while a ceremony held in a large church or temple often sets a

more formal tone. Music played during the ceremony also goes a long way toward setting the tone couples hope to establish. When choosing music for the ceremony, couples should first consider the venue where they are tying the knot. Some, such as houses of worship, may have rules pertaining to what can and cannot be played inside the venue. Classical, hymnal or processional music often makes the best fit when weddings are taking place in more formal venues. Outdoor weddings tend to give couples more leeway. But in general couples don’t want to choose any music that’s too loud or over-the-top for their ceremonies. Keep in mind that while the music played during the ceremony can set the tone for the day, this music can vary significantly from the music played during the reception. A favorite performer may not be appropriate during the ceremony, but that doesn’t mean the couple can’t dance to that artist’s music during the reception. Live musicians can add a more elegant feel to the ceremony, but such performers also can be costly. Playing prerecorded mu-

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sic may not be as elegant as having a live performer, but it can cost a lot less and still make for an enjoyable day and evening.

RECEPTION

Many couples prefer deejays to live bands for their wedding receptions. Deejays can play favorite songs as couples and their guests know them, while bands can only play their own renditions of those songs. Another thing to consider when choosing between a deejay or live band for the reception is the venue itself. Some venues are smaller and unable to accommodate a full band, while others may not have ideal acoustics, making it difficult for a live band to sound as good as they might in a more music-friendly environment. The formality of the event should also come into consideration when choosing between a live band or a deejay for the reception. Deejays spinning the latest top 40 hits may stick out like sore thumbs at especially formal weddings, while a classical orchestra likely won’t fit into the laid back theme of a beach or destination wedding. Couples tying the knot outdoors may need to consider equipment when choosing bands or deejays to play their weddings. For example, some venues do not provide equipment, such as microphones and speaker systems, to couples for their ceremonies. Renting such equipment can be costly, but couples can often skirt such charges by hiring deejays or bands who lend couples their equipment during the ceremony. Deejays or bands who will loan and set up the necessary sound equipment for outdoor ceremonies merit extra consideration. When discussing music to be played during the reception, couples must consider their own musical tastes as well as those of their guests. A wide range of popular music tends to go best at wedding receptions, as guests are more likely to dance to songs they recognize. Avoid any music that has the potential to offend guests, opting for lighter, happier tunes instead. Whether hiring a band or deejay, couples should make a list of no-play songs or artists and make sure that such lists are included in their contracts. Music plays an important role on couples’ wedding days. Though choosing music for the ceremony and the reception is often fun, couples must take such decisions seriously. — WMS


F E AT U R E S

New times, modern traditions abound

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ctober is the new June. More and more, weddings are taking place in the height of fall foliage, heart of winter and prime holiday season, including the ever-popular New Year’s Eve ceremony to ring in the new year. But it’s not just the wedding season that has drastically evolved over the past decade, it’s everything from roles and responsibilities to gift-giving. As you gear up to celebrate the union of your beloved family or friends — or even your own — know what to expect from the changing tides of weddings. Lizzie Post, co-author of “Emily Post’s Etiquette, 18th edition” and great-great-granddaughter of Emily Post, helps couples navigate the new traditions of weddings. The Post name has been synonymous with proper etiquette and manners for the past 80 years. As decades pass, so will traditions, but proper etiquette is timeless. Be prepared for the next wedding you attend and know what to expect from changes in the wedding landscape with these important pieces of advice:

PAY IT FORWARD

TEMPER TECH USE

Even weddings are going hi-tech. There are numerous websites available that can help the couple to organize the process, communicate with guests and share photos after the ceremony. But a few things - like a handwritten “thank you” note - should steer clear of the hi-tech lure. In a gadget-driven society, everyone is carrying a smartphone. Couples can post a tasteful notice at the entrance of

RESPECT PERSONALIZATION

Couples want their special day to reflect who they are and what is important to them. While previous generations traditionally wed in places of worship, many modern couples choose to tie the knot at a sentimental location, like where they had their first date. The decor, music and even the food and drink served at a wedding may have a personal story behind it. No matter how nontraditional the element may be, guests should eagerly partake in the festivities, acknowledging and respecting the couple’s individualization.

BE ALL-INCLUSIVE

for the bride and bachelor parties were a men-only affair. Nowadays, these festivities are no longer gender-specific. Showers can be thrown for the couple in unison and include creative themes like “stock the bar” or “time of day.” Bachelor and bachelorette parties can also be conjoined to involve the entire bridal party in a destination event. And while these events are a celebration of joy, expenses can add up quickly. If you use a rewards card, like the BankAmericard Travel Rewards credit card, you can earn points on purchases to pay for all or part of your trip. This is great for both the bride and groom and guests traveling to the wedding. As trends and expectations shift, so will the way major life milestones are celebrated. It is important to celebrate these moments in life with grace and support for the happy couple — after all, it’s their day — and it should be as unique as they are. For further etiquette advice on navigating 21st century weddings, visit www. emilypost.com.

In the past, bridal showers were strictly

— BPT

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Finding the right gift for the newlyweds can be difficult. While registries help to point guests in the right direction, many couples are getting married later in life and already have all the household items that are common wedding gifts. To provide the couple with a small nest egg to use however they wish, a check is always a great and safe gift idea. Several financial institutions, like Bank of America, offer mobile check deposit through their banking app, allowing the couple the flexibility to deposit checks on-thego to help cover outstanding vendor payments or use on their honeymoon. Another new-age trend is contributing to a couple’s honeymoon fund.

the ceremony location or in the program to remind guests to turn off their cell phone ringers and refrain from use during the ceremony. Some couples may actually encourage guests to take photos and share images via social media, but guests should respect their wishes and use phones only as a camera and upload images after the ceremony.

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F E AT U R E S

Why you should hire a wedding planner

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lanning a wedding is often both fun and frustrating. While planning a party for friends and family can be fun, couples can easily be overwhelmed by the nuts and bolts of planning such a significant event. Interviewing vendors, negotiating prices and arranging for accommodations are just a few of the many tasks couples must complete before they can finally relax and tie the knot. The sheer volume of decisions couples must make when planning a wedding is one rea-

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son many men and women seek the services of wedding planners. The following are some additional reasons couples might want to ease their burdens and hire wedding planners as they get ready for their big day. * Planners are familiar with vendors. Wedding planners work for couples, and while planners often recommend certain vendors, they typically work with whomever the couples ultimately choose. As a result, veteran wedding planners tend to have worked with every florist, caterer,

deejay, and venue in their areas. That makes them an invaluable resource to couples who don’t know where to begin as they start planning their weddings. Wedding planners can save couples time by suggesting couples avoid certain vendors, whether it’s because those vendors have poor service records or they simply don’t fit into a couple’s budget. Wedding planners also can make recommendations based on what couples want. For example, wedding planners may know which deejays are best for more raucous receptions and which ones are best suited for couples who want a more formal affair. n Planners know pricing. Wedding vendors often leave room for negotiation when making proposals to prospective customers. Seasoned wedding planners will know the going rates for various services, helping couples get the best rates possible and doing so with minimal effort. In addition, planners might be able to negotiate directly with vendors they have worked with in the past, removing one of the biggest stressors of planning a wedding, the negotiation process, from the list of responsibilities couples must handle before tying the knot. n Planners remember the small details you’re likely to forget. Many couples who have large weddings are getting married for the first time, and there are bound to be details they overlook along the way. Seasoned wedding planners are far less likely to overlook even the tiniest of details, helping couples rest easy knowing that no stone has gone unturned as their big days draw closer and closer. n Planners keep you on course. The longer a couple’s engagement, the easier it becomes to put certain decisions off. But as the wedding day draws nearer, that procrastination often turns into panic, as couples realize their options dwindling and decisions need to be made as soon as possible. Wedding planners hired shortly after a couple gets engaged will be there to ensure couples stay on track, making decisions as needed and not putting important decisions off until the last minute. n Planners make the wedding day less stressful. Despite all the planning and preparation that goes into their weddings, couples often find their wedding days to be whirlwind days that seem to fly by. Small problems on a couple’s wedding day have a tendency to be magnified, but a seasoned wedding planner can address such issues before the couple is even aware they existed. This makes the day much more enjoyable for the bride and groom and their investment in a wedding planner that much more worthwhile. — WMS


F E AT U R E S

Roles of the best man and maid of honor

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eing chosen as a best man or a maid of honor is a significant and meaningful honor. Those roles have evolved over the years, but these special participants must still perform some of the traditional duties of the past, including serving as the official witnesses to the ceremony. The following is a rundown of the various duties maids of honor and best men are now expected to handle once they’re chosen for these distinguished honors.

PRIOR TO THE WEDDING

AFTER THE WEDDING

The best man will be in charge of re-

turning the tuxedoes to the rental shop, if necessary. He also may drive the newly married couple to the airport so they can depart on their honeymoon. The maid of honor will assist the bride in changing out of her gown and into her travel clothes. Oftentimes the maid of honor takes the gown to the cleaners in the days following the ceremony so the dress can be preserved. — WMS

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WEDDING DAY

On the day of the wedding, the maid of honor and the best man will act as a support system for the bride and groom. The maid of honor will help the bride get dressed and help iron out any miniemergencies that should crop up. The best man will help ensure all of the ushers are dressed and get the groom to the wedding on time. During the ceremony, the maid of honor will hold the bride’s bouquet while she participates in the wedding. The best man will keep the rings safe until they are needed. The maid of honor also will help

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Before the wedding takes place, the maid of honor will closely assist the brideto-be with many of the important decisions related to the look and the feel of the wedding. She typically accompanies the bride to dress shops to select gowns for the bride and bridesmaids. Much in the same manner, the best man will assist the groomto-be with choosing tuxedoes or suits and also with coordinating with the ushers to ensure they know when to go for fittings. Although the best man will serve as a sounding board for the groom, traditionally the bride and her bridesmaids have taken on the majority of the wedding planning, so the maid of honor can expect to play a larger role than the best man. The maid of honor may be asked to delegate certain assignments, such as helping to find wedding vendors or addressing invitations. She may go with the bride for makeup and hairstyle trials. Together with the bridesmaids, she will plan a bridal shower party and a bachelorette excursion. She may select a wedding gift for the couple and present it on behalf of all the wedding attendants. The best man will coordinate the bachelor party and may be asked to assist the groom with selecting a honeymoon site or to come along to book the trip.

adjust the bride’s train and veil as she sits and stands during the ceremony. Both will sign the marriage certificate as witnesses. At the reception, the best man is expected to give a toast and the maid of honor may share some words as well. She also may accompany the bride to the restroom and assist her with managing the gown.

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JANUARY 2014 | NN Y LIVING WEDDINGS

A Romantic Tradition

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F E AT U R E S

Get great deals on wedding services

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any engaged couples have grandiose visions of their wedding days. While such visions typically come to fruition, they often do so only after heavy negotiations with the various vendors necessary to turn a dream wedding into a reality. Negotiating prices with wedding vendors is something brides- and groomsto-be may not anticipate, but the process of negotiation is paramount for couples who hope to plan their dream weddings without ruining their budgets. Though vendors vary considerably with regard to their willingness to negotiate, the following are a few tips for couples hoping to get the best deals possible on their wedding services. n Prepare, prepare, prepare. Couples who blindly enter negotiations with wedding venues and vendors are far less likely to get a good deal. When working with any wedding vendor, whether it’s a wedding venue representative, a local florist or a deejay, couples should know what the going rate for the vendor’s services are. Couples who find a venue they like should receive quotes from similar venues before negotiating a rate with the venue they most prefer. Arming oneself with quotes from competitors increases the chances of receiving a more couple-friendly quote from the venue liked best, as that venue won’t want to lose business, especially to one of its chief competitors. In addition to pricing, estimates from other venues can vary based on what they include. Even if a favorite venue does not come down much on its original quote, they may be willing to add extra services, such as an open bar

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or an extra hour during the reception, free of charge to match a competitor’s offer.But they cannot match such offers if couples don’t first do their homework and solicit estimates from their competitors. n Avoid making demands. Coming off as too demanding when negotiating prices with wedding vendors may not produce the results couples are hoping for. Much like couples don’t want to receive “take it or leave it” offers, vendors don’t want to be given demands they have to meet in order to book a wedding. The right tone can go a long way with wedding vendors, who are typically more willing to work with couples who treat them nicely than couples who enter the negotiation process full of demands. Vendors often like it when couples know what they want, but couples are not doing themselves any favors when they express those desires as demands. n Don’t be afraid to ask for more. Making demands and asking for more are not the same thing. When negotiating with wedding vendors, there’s no harm in asking for more. For example, the worst a deejay can do when asked to play an extra hour at no additional charge is deny that request. Reception venues often have the most wiggle room, so don’t be afraid to ask for free coffee with dessert or valet parking. Vendors are often open to suggestion and willing to honor requests, but it’s not their responsibility to make such offers. n Make sure all contracts are itemized, and read them thoroughly before signing on the dotted line. The negotiation process is often tedious, and contracts should reflect that. When hiring a wedding ven-

dor, make sure the contract is itemized, spelling out in intimate detail just what was negotiated and how much each item costs. Couples may even notice items in the contract that can be removed, saving them a few dollars as a result. Be especially mindful of extra fees that can add up. For example, some venues try to make up for lower rates couples negotiated by tacking on fees for cutting the cake or other minute details. These fees will be in the contract, and it’s up to couples to have them removed before they sign and the contract becomes official. n Remember there are two parties involved in the negotiation process. Vendors are not the only ones who might need to bend a little at the negotiating table. Couples might have to be flexible in order to make their dream weddings a reality. Some vendors charge considerably less during certain times of the year than they do during peak wedding season. If couples are finding it impossible to afford the wedding of their dreams during peak wedding season, they should consider tying the knot during a less popular time of year, when venues and vendors can offer them more competitive rates. Bridesand grooms-to-be cannot expect vendors to bend over backward for couples who aren’t willing to make any concessions themselves, so couples might have to make certain sacrifices at the negotiating table when planning their weddings. Negotiation plays a significant role in wedding planning. Couples who take the process of negotiation seriously often find the best deals without having to make too many concessions. — WMS

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F E AT U R E S

The right wedding dress silhouette

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ew wardrobe decisions are scrutinized as much as a bride-to-be’s choice of wedding gown. Finding the perfect gown that flatters the future bride’s figure while stunning her guests and soon-to-be husband is a labor of love for many brides. The Bridal Association of America estimates a bride-to-be will spend between $1,500 and $2,000 total on her gown, veil and accessories. Brides often spend months, if not years, shoping for the right gown. Finding the right gown means having an understanding of what silhouettes are available and what flatters certain body types. After all, you want to look like the best version of yourself when getting married. Here is a look of some of the common types of gown silhouettes and why choosing this shape might be right for you.

BALLGOWN

A ballgown dress is truly a classic style, evoking images of fairy tale princesses. With a fitted bodice and full skirt that flairs at the waist, this silhouette is usually good for all body types. Because the full skirt, typically poofed-up by crinoline and will hide the hips and thighs, women with a pear shape might gravitate toward this style. The ballgown style may not be ideal for petite women, as the skirt may overwhelm their figures.

A-LINE

Another silhouette very forgiving or appropriate for many body types is the

Finding the right gown means having an understanding of what silhouettes are available and what flatters certain body types. After all, you want to look like the best version of yourself when getting married. A-line gown. A-line cut dresses should be the go-to style for anyone looking to minimize perceived flaws. The cut of the dress will fit to the waist and gradually fan out from the hips to form the outline of an uppercase “A.” When in doubt, Aline gowns are classic and sensible and a favorite among brides.

TRUMPET

Women who prefer something a little more form-fitting may select a trumpet silhouette. This dress is fitted through the body and then the gown flares out at midthigh level. Women with taught stomachs and hourglass figures can benefit from this style gown, but those who do not want anything tight in the hips and thighs will want to select something else.

MERMAID

silhouette is close to the body from the chest down to the knee. The skirt then flares out slightly by the knee. Tall, thin women generally look best in this type of gown.

MODIFIED A-LINE

A balance between a traditional A-line and a more fitted gown, the modified A-line does not flare out as much. But it does flare out enough from the waist to hide areas around the hips and thighs. This is another good choice for a wide array of figures.

TEA LENGTH

Brides who do not want a gown that reaches the floor can opt for a tea length dress, on which the skirt generally falls between the ankle and the knee.

SHEATH

Lean brides who want simplicity in their gowns can opt for a sheath silhouette. The narrow shape of the gown from the neckline to the hem will definitely accentuate the body shape. Therefore, women who are shy may want to select a different option. Petite women who may be overwhelmed by more fabric can usually wear a sheath gown with success. Although a bride may have a wedding gown style in mind, it is a good idea to try on a number of different silhouettes to find the one that is most flattering. Bridal salon employees are usually wellversed in matching body type to a gown and can prove invaluable when selecting a dress.

A bit more fitted than the trumpet, this

— WMS

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F E AT U R E S

Planning the right rehearsal dinner

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ne of the final responsibilities a couple has before they tie the knot is planning their rehearsal dinner. Typically the night before the wedding, the rehearsal dinner is an opportunity for the families of the brideand groom-to-be and the members of the bridal party to get to know one another over a good meal. Planning a rehearsal dinner is much less complicated than planning the wedding, but couples still must take steps in advance of the dinner to ensure it goes smoothly. n Choose the right restaurant. Couples who are having their ceremony and reception at the same venue may be able to have their rehearsal dinner at the venue as well. But many couples still prefer the rehearsal dinner be held at a different restaurant. When choosing the restaurant, be sure to make a reservation several weeks in advance and choose a restaurant that’s fully capable of accommodating your party. The restaurant should have a menu that’s versatile enough to accommodate guests on special diets or those who are vegetarian or vegan. The rehearsal dinner party can be quite large, so you’ll want to make your reservation as early as possible so you can get the restaurant of your choice. The larger the group, the earlier you should make the reservation. n Invite the right guests. Some couples may be confused as to whom they should invite to their rehearsal dinners. Wedding party members and their significant others should always make the cut, as should

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Planning a rehearsal dinner is much less complicated than planning the wedding, but couples still must take steps in advance of the dinner to ensure it goes smoothly the parents of both the bride and groom and the person officiating the wedding. Kids who will be in the wedding and their parents also should be invited. Many couples even invite their immediate family members and siblings, even if those relatives are not in the wedding. n Determine who is paying in advance. The groom’s family traditionally pays for the rehearsal dinner, but that tradition has largely fallen by the wayside. Couples should determine who will be paying for the dinner in advance so there’s no confusion once the meal is over. Couples who are handling the bill for their weddings should include the rehearsal dinner in their overall wedding budget. n Try to create a relaxed atmosphere. Many of the people invited to the rehearsal dinner may be meeting one another for the first time, so couples should aim to create a relaxed atmosphere to reduce any nervousness and tension. The rehearsal

dinner may also be the only time couples can relax and let their hair down with their family and friends, as the wedding day itself and the ensuing reception can be hectic. So take advantage of the more relaxed atmosphere and share a few laughs with those closest to you. n Bring the gifts for members of your wedding party. The rehearsal dinner is when brides- and grooms-to-be give their bridesmaids and groomsmen their gifts. If the gifts are especially large, then you might want to give them before you enter the restaurant or even back at the hotel. But in many cases, it’s perfectly alright to give out the bridesmaid and groomsmen gifts at the rehearsal dinner. n Allow time for toasts. Toasts are not just a tradition of the wedding reception, but of the rehearsal dinner as well. The couple’s parents often want to toast the bride- and groom-to-be, and such a toast may be conducted in tandem. But the groom is also expected to give a toast, most notably to his bride-to-be. In addition, the couple walking down the aisle can toast their bridal party during the rehearsal dinner, thanking them for being a part of their big day. Rehearsal dinners are typically a fun chance for couples and their families and friends to enjoy an intimate and relaxing dinner with one another the night before the couple’s big day. But as relaxing as the rehearsal dinner should be, couples should still follow certain protocols to ensure the dinner goes off without a hitch. — WMS

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JANUARY 2014 | NN Y LIVING WEDDINGS

PHOTO BY NATALIE’S STUDIO, LOWVILLE

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BEST PHOTOS 2013 ‘Focal point’ LOCATION: St. Patrick’s Catholic Church, Watertown SEASON: Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Chris Bova I was running around with my head cut off in St. Patrick’s Church, taking

‘Not your normal places’

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LOCATION: Downtown Watertown SEASON: Late Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Chris Bova We were shooting in downtown Watertown, and this was a lastminute shot. Three generations of the bride’s family had been going to The Crystal Restaurant — they’re all

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from Watertown. They didn’t want their pictures in typical places like Thompson Park, Parkside Cemetery or Sackets Harbor, they wanted them in downtown Watertown. We had another shot with the groom and groomsmen walking in the street downtown. We got traffic to stop for about two minutes. People were honking and shouting, “Congratulations!” All of Public Square was participating.

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pictures of the front of the bride, and I ran around and got the back, too. I love our Catholic churches. Everyone’s looking at the bride, but you also get the rotundas and the murals on the ceiling. The flash is from the bride’s grandmother — she was standing there in the second or third row with a disposable camera.


BEST PHOTOS 2013

‘No rush’ LOCATION: Robert Wehle State Park, Henderson Harbor SEASON: Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Chris Bova They had taken an engagement picture there in

the spring, with water running underneath them. This was shot in July, and from where I stood, rocks led to the Lake. People rent the location for the whole week, so they started setting the grounds on Wednesday as they didn’t have to hurry. They were playing around on the log and I asked them to just sit down. The way the lighting was, it was a perfect shot.

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BEST PHOTOS 2013

‘Inspecting the dress’ LOCATION: Sackets Harbor SEASON: Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Lauren Harrienger

This shot was taken during the bride’s preparation for the wedding ceremony. She carefully inspected the dress that she’d chosen to make sure it was perfect for her special day before she changed into her gown.

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Lauren Photography & Design Dexter www.LaurenHarrienger.com

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BEST PHOTOS 2013 ‘Sealed with a kiss’ LOCATION: Sackets Harbor SEASON: Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Lauren Harrienger

‘A walk to remember’ LOCATION: Sackets Harbor SEASON: Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Lauren Harrienger

This classic shot was taken after the ceremony overlooking Lake Ontario. It illustrates the full beauty of the bride’s dress and the love that the newly married couple share.

This shot was taken as the bride and her grandfather entered the church to begin the long walk down the aisle.

JANUARY 2014 | NN Y LIVING WEDDINGS

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BEST PHOTOS 2013 ‘The road goes on forever’ LOCATION: Thompson Park, Watertown SEASON: Winter PHOTOGRAPHER: Allie Nettles-Casey

‘Hands down’ LOCATION: Watertown, bride’s mother’s house SEASON: Winter

‘Immortalized in print’

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LOCATION: Best Western Carriage House Inn, Watertown SEASON: Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Allie Nettles-Casey

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PHOTOGRAPHER: Allie Nettles-Casey This is a shot I like to take, especially if the grandmother is present. It’s a great way to see the progression of life.

This is the first time I thought to take such a shot. I happened to see the newspaper there and I liked the idea of immortalizing the date and helping that time stand still. I liked that the newspaper brought in the surroundings, and the blanket in the background adds a pop of color.

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This shot was perfect for the wedding. She wanted to make everything very classic, so nothing was overdone or tacky. They’re a very beautiful couple, very loving. I’ve known the bride for a long time, so it was nice to do a friend’s wedding.


BEST PHOTOS 2013

‘Lifelong love of books’ LOCATION: Flower Memorial Library, Watertown SEASON: Winter PHOTOGRAPHER: Allie Nettles-Casey The bride chose the library. After we took some

shots in the more ornate areas, it was getting ready to close, so we couldn’t go downstairs. But the librarian said we could shoot at the Children’s Room bookshelves. I liked the feel of having the books around them. They gave the photo texture and depth. Plus, the groom is a teacher.

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JANUARY 2014 | NN Y LIVING WEDDINGS

In the Arcade

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BEST PHOTOS 2013

‘Location, location, location’ LOCATION: A cemetery SEASON: Winter PHOTOGRAPHER: Natalie Wendig

‘First look’ LOCATION: Tug Hill Vineyards SEASON: Fall PHOTOGRAPHER: Natalie Wendig The bride wanted to build up the anticipation, so we have a set of images where they were both on

This might surprise you, but that’s not a church; it’s a cemetery. The bride and I loved the architecture and scale. People wondered if it would look funny, having wedding photos at a cemetery. But it’s about composition and eye angle. the opposite sides of a wall, talking to each other, but they couldn’t see each other. She walked down the side of the building, until they got to the corner and they met. It doesn’t take away at all from the emotion of the day. It’s one of the only times you get alone time on your wedding day.

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Natalie’s Studio Copenhagen www.nataliewstudio.com

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BEST PHOTOS 2013 ‘Girls wil be girls’ LOCATION: Bride’s mother’s house SEASON: Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Natalie Wendig This is the bride’s best friend doing her make-up in her mother’s house. They were there very early and I was

‘A place in the shade’ LOCATION: Constable Hall, Constableville SEASON: Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Natalie Wendig The couple had a gorgeous mid-summer garden wedding at

Constable Hall in the middle of the day. Architecture frames the image and the porch shades the couple. I love finding “their” wedding shot that will describe their day. It’s about the couple and love. Landscape or architecture is an art image that, when composed with bride and groom, can be very dynamic.

there, too, because preparation is an important part of the day. They just happened to have a gorgeous window right there. They have a wonderful relationship. By that time, I’d worked with the client on multiple times, and when the wedding day came, we were friends.


BEST PHOTOS 2013 ‘Wrapped up’ LOCATION: Beeches in Rome SEASON: Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Kristen Charles This is one of my all-time favorites. I love to use light, and I love to shoot toward the sun because it illuminates the veil. This veil was about 30 feet long and perfect for the shot.

‘Snuggle in’

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LOCATION: Beeches in Rome SEASON: Summer PHOTOGRAPHER: Kristen Charles You could tell that they’ve all known each other. They all had their own ideas, but they all got along. There’s

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not one flaw about any of them. I don’t like to pose people. I just like to tell them what to do and see how they mold in together. So, I said, “Go in toward the bride. Snuggle in. You’re at a sleepover. This is what girls do.” They didn’t have to do anything but just smile.

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We got them stuck in the veil and it was the best lighting I could have ever hoped for. This couple was up for anything. Clearly you can tell they are so in love. I knew romantic shots would be very easy with them. The groom was a typical guy who didn’t love to pose for pictures, but when I told him to go and kiss his wife, it was automatic.


BEST PHOTOS 2013

‘With personality to boot’ LOCATION: Bonnie Castle Resort, Alexandria Bay SEASON: Fall PHOTOGRAPHER: Kristen Charles This photo captures the bride’s style. We shot her engagement photos and I told her I loved her

rubber rain boots. When we got to the wedding, she surprised me with these rubber rain boots for her whole bridal party on what was a wet, nasty day. We were shooting photos of the bride, and I turned around and a bridesmaid had tucked all the bouquets into the tops of the boots. It was late fall, in November.

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