Wedding Planner

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A SPECIAL SECTION OF THE DENISON BULLETIN AND DENISON REVIEW

WEDDING PLANNER www.DBRnews.com | Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Church weddings offer elements of tradition

by Gordon Wolf In her 15 years as a pastor, Rev. Alberta Ervin from the First United Methodist Church in Denison, has seen variety in wedding ceremonies. Some have been large, with 250 to 300 guests or with as many as six attendants each for the bride and groom. Some have been small, with just six people witnessing the ceremony. But an element all church weddings have in common is that the brides and grooms are seeking tradition. Pastor Alberta reminds couples that come to her that a church wedding is first and foremost a worship service. "It is a couple's expression of love to each other in front of witnesses and God,"

she stated. In fact, one of the first elements of the wedding ceremony is the declaration of intention, a charge from the pastor for the bride and groom to declare their pledge of faith to each other, in front of those attending the ceremony and before God. "One question I ask couples who come to me, especially if they have been living together for a while, is why now, and why they want a church wedding," she said. These questions, and many others, are part of the pre-marital counseling sessions that Pastor Alberta provides. The sessions help Pastor Alberta get to know the couple better, if she isn't already acquainted with them, and to learn about their family histories. Knowing the family histories provides insight into what has worked well and what hasn't in the parents' and grandparents'

marriages. "Parents are who form us no matter what age," Pastor Alberta explained. She added, "Communication is one of the keys for a marriage. The family history gives clues how people in the family communicate and how they have worked through difficulties." Couples can expect to talk about basic characteristics during the premarital sessions. For example, what happens if the groom is an introvert and the bride is an extrovert; the wife wants to talk as soon as the husband is home but all he wants is a little quiet time first. The sessions give advice how to handle these types of situations. "It is really good to have these conversations. We can see patterns that do not help communication, and I provide options to resolve these conflicts," Pastor Alberta stated. CEREMONY . . . Page 3


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