GoodLife January-February by Northern Michigan Review Inc.

January/February 2011

Your life up north

Goodlife New routine

10 habits to make this year

Healthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best friend

Why having a pet could improve your quality of life

Which WILL work?

Living trust, living will & will

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Affiliated with Northern Michigan Regional Health System

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2 Your LIFE UP NORTH

Contents

22 27 features 6 Good Stuff

Good To Go: Shoulder Press Good Humor: Katie MacInnis Grandparenting: Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day

9 Nod to Nostalgia 1948, the year of the Frisbee 10 Good Taste Pulled pork

16 On the cover: Maggie Daniels is director at the North Central Michigan College Student and Community Resource Center in Petoskey.

12 Good Escape The Inn at Bay Harbor

22 Cover story 10 habits to make this year

14 A Good Word Anne Kelly

27 Good Cents The difference between living trust, living will and will

16 Good Health Prescription: pets

29 Good Samaritan Big Brothers, Big Sisters

20 Good Idea Painting sanctuary GOODlife 3

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Goodlife January/February 2011 - Volume 2, Issue 3 Publisher Doug Caldwell Editor Maggie Peterson Photography G. Randall Goss Layout and design Wendy wolfsen For Advertising information contact Advertising Director Christy Lyons (231) 439-9329 clyons@petoskeynews.com Advertising Sales Beth Flynn Jeff Genschaw Matt Hausler Joy Holmes Bob Reedy Bridge wertz Lisa Sladek

ÂŠ GoodLife, all rights reserved, 2011. Reproduction in any form, in whole or in part, without express written permission, is prohibited. The views expressed herein, whether expressed as fact, fiction, opinion, advice or otherwise, are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the ownership or management of this magazine. The publication of any advertisement does not reflect any endorsement for any products or services by the ownership or management of this magazine unless it is specifically stated in such advertisement that there is approval for such endorsement.

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GoodLife is published bi-monthly by Northern Michigan Review, Inc. GoodLife Magazine 319 State St., Petoskey, Mich. 49770

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Good Stuff Good to go

Good humor

Resist Shoulder Overhead Press

Maintaining and increasing joint mobility is important for maturing bodies. “People over 50 need to start increasing resistance exercise. What builds bones is resistance exercise and weight-bearing exercise,” said Dean Tahtinen, physical therapist with First Choice Physical Therapy in Petoskey. The resist shoulder overhead press serves to efficiently move your shoulders through a full range of motion, Tahtinen said. Additionally, building muscle and bone helps fight against osteoporosis. Here are the steps: 1. Holding a pound of weight — a 16-ounce bottle of water or can of soup in each hand — sit or stand with your arms at your sides and your elbows slightly bent.

2. Lift

weights up and over your head.

3. Return

repeat.

to start position and

Do as many repetitions as you are comfortable with. The next day, do 80 percent of the first day’s set to avoid overworking your body, Tahtinen said. For example, if you lifted a total of 30 times, try for 24. Maintain the 80 percent until you become more comfortable with the exercise, then increase the weight and repetitions. “I like to tell people, begin with Campbell’s Soup and move to navy beans,” Tahtinen said. — Morgan Sherburne

Jim Wade of Petoskey does

a resist shoulder overhead press.

6 Your LIFE UP NORTH

Are we appy? If it seems difficult to embrace new technology, you are not alone. All throughout history humans have struggled with change. If you had been in the horse-and-buggy business in the late 1800s, it would be hard to be happy about the internal combustion engine. You might even tell others how horses were better. So if you are bewildered by the new phones, Twitter, MySpace, GPS, all of it, you have lots of company. One hundred years after the horse was put back in the barn, we are confronted with things like apps on iPhones. For less than $5 you can obtain a program (that would be an app, short for application, as no one seems to have time for entire words anymore) that shows, on the phone face, a glass of beer. When you tip it, the “beer” will empty in the same way it does when you drink beer. Now there’s an improvement! Of course, WE come from the paradigm (I knew I could get that word in) of John Belushi, wearing a toga, crushing beer cans against his forehead at a fraternity party in the memorable movie, Animal House. That was beer drinking! And if memory serves me, $5 would have bought a case back then. You can easily see how far we’ve come. So when your children speak to you condescendingly if you can’t understand almost everything they say, when you ask a friend a simple question on the phone, like “what time is the gettogether” and they say, “Just look at the e-mail I sent you,” when people no longer have eye contact with you, but you frequently have complete conversations while they are Twittering someone/ thing and you are left to view the top of their head ... try to remember how far we have come. — Katie MacInnis Katie MacInnis is a retired nurse living in Harbor Springs with her husband, Charlie, and Fred and Amelia, her cat and dog. She keeps busy doing volunteer work, collecting her Social Security checks and getting senior coffee, even from the drive-in window. She loves to write, and finds lots of humor in the changes that aging brings.

Good Stuff Grandparenting Grandparenting

Valentines Day V

alentine’s Day is the perfect excuse to gather the grandkids and get out the glue, glitter, crayons and construction paper to make cards for your loved ones. “To create a lovely valentine, as well as a heartwarming memory,” noted Nicki Matelski of Ben Franklin in Petoskey, “gather some or all of the following supplies.” — A ssorted colored and decorative papers — Rubber or acrylic stamps with an ink pad — Colored pencils or markers, stickers, ribbon, glitter and adhesive — A paper trimmer or scissors You can add your own touch with photos or a from-the-heart poem, she said. good thought “Be creative. You can collect items from around the house: buttons, silk flowers, etc.,” Matelski added. Cut a card in the outline of Good to Know your grandchild’s hand to create a personalized touch. For a unique shape, cut a card out of paper as you would a paper snowflake, but use red paper. Fold the paper into quarters or sixteenths, and instead of cutting angular snowflake shapes, cut heart shapes instead. — Morgan Sherburne

Good thoughts When grace is joined with wrinkles, it is adorable. There is an unspeakable dawn in happy old age. — Victor Hugo When I was 40, my doctor advised me that a man in his 40s shouldn’t play tennis. I heeded his advice carefully and could hardly wait until I reached 50 to start again. — Hugo L. Black You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old. — George Burns

GOODlife 7

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NOD to to Nostalgia -- 19XX 1948 Music

Movie

Nat King Cole

“Easter Parade”

xxxxxxx

For eight weeks during 1948, Nat King Cole’s “Nature xxxxxxBoy” held the No. 1 spot in the Billboard Top 10. Hits such as “Mona Lisa,” “Too Young” and, of xxxxxxxxxx course, “Unforgettable,” followed in the same period. Because of his popularity, Cole was the first African American to host a network variety program. “The Nat King Cole Show” debuted in 1956 on NBC, but lasted only one season because of lack of sponsorship. Cole passed away in 1965 from lung cancer. He was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in the Early Influences category that honors artists who performed before the rise of rock ‘n’ roll, but impacted it regardless.

In the news In the news — Harry S. Truman is elected president, beating xxxxxx Thomas Dewey, Strom Thurmond and Henry Wallace. xxxxxxxxxx — Mahatma Gandhi is assassinated by a Hindu extremist.

xxxxxxx

In the 1948 film “Easter Parade, xxxxxx” Don Hewes (Fred Astaire) and Nadine Hale (Ann Miller) are a successful dancing team, until Hale decides to begin her own career. xxxxxxxxxx Hewes vows to teach a chorus girl, Hannah Brown (Judy Garland), to dance better than Hale. Brown learns how to dance — but not before falling in love with Hewes. But Hewes still has feelings for Hale, who loves Hewes’ best friend, Jonathan Harrow (Peter Lawford). Harrow falls in love with Brown, completing the romantic rectangle. “Easter Parade” won an Oscar for Best Music and Scoring of a Musical Picture, and a Writers Guild of America award for Best Written American Musical.

The way it was The way it was

The

Frisbee xxxxxxx Walter Frederick Morris had been flinging cake xxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxx pans for fun for 11 years before reinventing them as the Flyin-Saucer in 1948. He sold them at local parks and beaches in Los — NASCAR has its first modified stock car Angeles. After another 11 years, Morrison sold race in Daytona Beach. his invention, renamed the Pluto Platter, to the — Ferdinand Porsche develops the first roadster California-based company Wham-O. to bear the famous Porsche name. Wham-O found young people on the East Coast had been throwing the Frisbie Pie Co.’s tins, calling — Gas to fuel your Porsche would cost you them “Frisbies.” Company executives renamed the only 16 cents a gallon. discs “Frisbees” in 1958, and have since sold more — But, on average, you’d be making only about than 200 million. $2,950 per year. If you have a favorite nostalgic item you’d like to share with GOODLife readers, let us know! E-mail Beth Anne at bpiehl@petoskeynews.com. GOODlife 9

Good taste

Pulled pork A dinner that screams cold weather comfort food

the stovetop? It would be much fastIn a large saucepan over mediumer, there would be less cleanup and it high, combine the ribs, cider and would solve my liquid issues. barbecue sauce. Stir well, then bring To make this new approach work, I to a boil. Reduce heat to maintain a needed to change the cut of pork, but steady simmer. Cook for 1 hour to boneless (country-style) ribs worked 1 1/4 hours, or until the pork is very just fine. And to make a meal of it, I tender and the liquid is reduced and tried the resulting quick-cook cider- thick. barbecue pulled pork over mashed After 45 minutes, place the popotatoes. It was amazing. Best yet, it tatoes in a medium saucepan. Add was incredibly simple. enough cold water to cover, then Though this recipe calls for hard bring to a boil over medium-high cider (sold alongside beer), sweet ci- heat. Cook until the potatoes are der could be substituted. And while tender. Drain the potatoes and reit isn’t as quick as most weeknight turn to the pot. Add the butter and recipes, it is almost entirely hands milk, then mash. Mix in the parsley, off. then season with salt and pepper. J.M. HIRSCH AP Food Editor Cover and set aside. his dish started as a three-ingre- CIDER-BARBECUE PULLED PORK Use two forks to shred and pull dient slow cooker recipe. And I OVER MASHED POTATOES apart the pork, mixing it with the completely messed it up. Start to finish: 1 hour 15 minutes sauce. Serve the pork over the I’d read another recipe that called (20 minutes active) Servings: 6 mashed potatoes. for combining pork butt, a bottle of — 2 pounds boneless cola and a bottle of barbecue sauce in (country-style) pork ribs the slow cooker, then walking away. Nutrition information per Seemed interesting, though the cola — 1 pint hard cider serving (values are rounded idea made me want to gag (and yes, I — 18 1/2-ounce bottle know lots of people cook with cola). to the nearest whole number): barbecue sauce I tried it, substituting a bottle of 536 calories; 185 calories from hard cider for the cola. It was great, — 2 1/2 pounds russet potafat (35 percent of total calories); except that after six hours in the toes, peeled and quartered 21 g fat (11 g saturated; 0 g trans slow cooker the sauce was still way — 6 tablespoons butter too liquidy. I ended up dumping the fats); 144 mg cholesterol; 46 g whole thing into a saucepan and — 1/2 cup whole milk carbohydrate; 37 g protein; 2 boiling it until the sauce was reduced — 2 tablespoons chopped g fiber; 1,051 mg sodium. and thick. fresh parsley That made me wonder why I bothered with the slow cooker at all. — Salt and ground black pepper, to taste Why not just do the whole thing on

10 Your LIFE UP NORTH

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Good escape

Lakeside luxury

One of two penthouse suites at the Inn at Bay Harbor

The Inn at Bay Harbor offers exciting possibilities By Kristin Bates • Photos by G. Randall Goss

or many residents of Northern Michigan, the thought of braving the snow-covered roads for a winter getaway is overwhelming and daunting. But the nearby Inn at Bay Harbor — A Renaissance Golf Resort is just around the bend and full of exciting possibilities. With 134 rooms ranging from the guest room to the penthouse suite, 24 lakeside cottages or 15 cottages at Crooked Tree, there are accommodations to complement everyone’s taste. “We like to emphasize the lakeside luxury of the inn, with providing our guests with high-end services, dining and entertainment. It is the perfect romantic getaway with 12 Your LIFE UP NORTH

everything you need for a relaxing weekend without having to leave the premises,” said general manager Ron Braniecki. Sagamore’s, the South American Grille and Wine Bar, and the Inn Café offer guests a selection of contemporary gourmet fare and spa cuisine. “We have nightly theme dining options in the South American, with formal weekend dining in Sagamore’s, while the café is designed for quick snacks and light meals,” added Braniecki. From 6-9 p.m. every Wednesday, there will be sushi night at the South American featuring live music by Sean Bielby and Adam Engelman. There is a Friday night fish fry from 5:30-11 p.m. in Sagamore’s, which costs $14.95 per person.

To add to a relaxing visit, there is a full-service day spa and salon offering massages, a variety of body treatments and facials, as well as manicures and pedicures. Throughout the winter, beginning on Wednesday, Jan. 12, the spa will introduce special date night packages. There is a choice between the “Evening Getaway” and “Romantic Rendezvous” packages. Both packages offer a couple the choice of one 50-minute spa treatment, while the Romantic Rendezvous package includes two salon treatments. Reservations are required. During the evening, the South American Grille and Wine Bar will offer two appetizers, two entrees and two desserts for the cost of $80. For those looking for overnight accommodations, the Romance Package is a night’s stay in the

Room offerings

A standard bedroom at the Inn at Bay Harbor

Master Suite, a split of champagne, chocolate dipped strawberries, rose petal turndown services and breakfast for two. Also, with a focus on better health and well-being, a new addition to the spa is the Therapeutic Treatment Plans. Camryn Handler, spa director for the past three and a half years, explained that there isn’t any cost in advance for these plans, which include a choice of four, eight or 12 massages throughout the year. With a verbal commitment, a client can choose a 25-, 50- or 80-minute massage package with special discounted rates, which they can schedule at their convenience. A client may claim the cost of the plan as a flexible spending account, health savings account or medical savings account expense, too. “Experts estimate that upwards of 90 percent of disease is stress related. Perhaps nothing ages us faster, internally and externally, than high stress. Getting a massage can do you a world of good, and getting a massage frequently can do even more. This is the beauty of bodywork. Massage can, without a doubt, reduce stress,” said Handler. When asked about future plans,

Braniecki said, “We have seen an increase in conferences and the popularity of the destination wedding trade, which has been exciting. For future plans, we hope to include an added phase to our spa facility and implement an indoor pool.” For more information, visit www. innatbayharbor.com or call (231) 439-4000.

The fitness room overlooks the lobby.

Described as “cottage-style elegance,” guest room accommodations have two queen beds and a balcony. There are several suites available equipped with a fireplace and kitchenette that offer a relaxed and casual atmosphere. The master suite has one bedroom and bath, and can sleep up to four guests with additional sleeping arrangements in the living room. The specialty suite accommodates four guests. It has a view of Lake Michigan, two bedrooms, 2.5 baths and a covered porch. For up to six guests, the quarry suite has two bedrooms, two baths and a hot tub. For those with up to 10 people, the penthouse suite offers four bedrooms, five baths and two private balconies. There are laundry facilities, too. More suite options include the grand and tower suites. Set on the shores of Lake Michigan, the lakeside cottages have two- and three-bedroom units, which can accommodate up to eight guests. Each cottage has a full kitchen and dining area, living room, fireplace and deck or patio. There is a washer and dryer, too. The cottages at Crooked Tree are three-bedroom accommodations that overlook Lake Michigan and the Crooked Tree Golf Club, a short drive from the inn. Equipped with a selection of king, queen and twin beds, each cottage has a sleeper sofa for added convenience. In each master bedroom, there is a Whirlpool bath. These cottages offer a living and dining room, full kitchen, fireplace and covered patio.

A room at the Inn GOODlife 13

Good Word

Seize the day by Anne Kelly

erhaps single senior women are not really so different from their younger counterparts. It’s true that the number of restorative products needed to achieve a pleasing presence when it comes to attracting the opposite sex increases in proportion to one’s age, and that the pool of natural selection is also in proportional reduction for the older woman (this is sometimes referred to as “slim pickins”). However, a desire for companionship beyond the “circle of sisters” beats deep in the heart of practically every woman. Take my late mother-in-law, for example. At 98, she was cruising the nursing home in her walker looking for a likely boyfriend. Where does a respectable, available lady actually find a suitor these days? If one finds herself divorced or widowed, or is single in a new place, she might employ the high tech services of a reputable dating site online. Yes, she might. It’s really one step up from the well meant but usually disastrous fix-up. Curious to see what all the hype was about, I recently joined the millions of subscribers to an online dating site. It was either this or head downtown and sit on a barstool, which is not cool in my small town ... at my age ... at any age. The first time I signed up was several 14 Your LIFE UP NORTH

men this age who still have hair. (Not that hair is essential — teeth would be nice, however.) “May-December Kinda Guy,” the headline reads. Should I read it or delete? I decide to read: “Healthy, virile 35-year-old man looking for an older woman 50 + please who wants a little adventure ... loves travel (right ... on whose retirement money?), gives great masmonths ago for $29.95, the price of sages (so does my chiropractor and my insurance covers it), and loves one month of endless possibilities. I received 89 looks, 25 winks and to cuddle. (Hmmm. I’ll bet.)” I delete. 10 e-mails to which I responded “no “Condo4U2.” (Now we’re talkthanks,” and contact from one gentleman who was into texting lingo. I ing!) “70-year-old gentleman would got tired of consulting the dictionary of LOLs, OMGs and BTWs. So love to spend my golden years sharI passed up his winks and grins and ing my condo in Barcelona with you ... must speak Spanish, have dark initiated a new tack: visualization. Close my eyes. As I enter the hair and be able to make paella ... I world of cyberspace dating, I’ll am 5’5”, but I would be 10’ tall when pretend that I’m going to a fancy I’m with you ... ” I delete. I need a glass of wine. cocktail party. I am wearing what my mom would have called a “little What has brought me to this? I take black dress” (every girl needs one) a sip and continue on to the salad and am feeling attractive. I have bar. “Teddy Bear Looking For His put my best face forward (three acceptable photos that were taken Honey;” He has hair, so I continue. “I have a house on a lake, a six far enough away so as not to play up the lines around my eyes), and pack in the fridge (not on my tormy profile presents me as a mature so, sorry) and like jazz. So that you woman looking for someone with know I’m an up front kind of guy, “Substance, Salt and Pepper and a you need to know that I lost my job as a result of this tough economic Dash of Fun.” Let’s start with the appetizer recession but do not need financial table. I scroll down the Daily Dose. support as I do very well on food It’s hard to find a profile picture of stamps. I feel the tide could turn

any day now. Maybe you’re the inspiration I need. If you think so, send me an e-mail.” You’ve got to be kidding! The next one comes up with no picture. Delete. Do they think I’m crazy enough to write someone I can’t see? Obviously, nothing today. I return to my matches from other log-ins, those I put in the “Maybe” column. These candidates for my affection all have one thing in common: a nice smile. I figure that if they don’t look sinister, dark or toothless, they are worth a second look. I also like the ones that are not only smiling, but are pictured holding their little grandkids ... domestic security? The hot dishes may be more palatable. I move to the main course.

These are the ones who sort of in- situations, the man should make timidate me, only in a good way. I the first move, dear.” I have ignored WANT to be impressed. Impress this voice; I am too old to wait for me! The film directors, the authors, an overture. I’m not going to be onthe Ph.D.s, the men who claim to line dating when I’m 90 for heaven’s make more than $100,000 a year, sake. There’s no time to waste! the ones who live in hubs like NYC I have tasted the fare on this bufor Chicago and read books. But why fet table and sign out for tonight. are they out there in cyberspace Perhaps an aperitif will present looking for love? (Why am I?!) himself while I sleep. Tomorrow The poets always reel me in for morning there will be a secure edessert: mail responding to the profile ti“Vacancy ... Looking for Some- tled: “Unclaimed Treasure Waiting one to Fill the Rooms of my Heart,” to Be Discovered.” (That would be “Come Dance With Me,” “Seize the me!) GL Day,” “Let’s Sail Away ... ” I admit to having sent icebreakers. I have been known to have Anne Kelly is a freelance writer weak moments. However, I can still for several local publications. She hear my mother’s voice: “In social resides in Charlevoix.

GOODlife 15

Good health

Barking up the right tree

Pets provide the perfect prescription By Kristin Bates

here is a prescription on the market that will help relieve stress, improve your mood and lower your blood pressure all in one. It is called owning a pet. “I think the real prescription for good health lies in four paws, a purr or bark, and licks from a furry face. Researchers say pets, from the traditional dogs and cats

16 Your LIFE UP NORTH

to birds, small animals, reptiles and fish, improve their owner’s health by providing companionship, decreasing depression and relieving stress,” said Jane Balmer, a pet therapist and vet technician with the Little Traverse Bay Humane Society in Harbor Springs. For the past 15 years, Balmer has been taking animals to area care facilities for the purpose of offering residents the chance to interact and socialize with ani-

mals. “I started out as a volunteer. In 2003, the ANGEL Program was created at the shelter through grant money collected,” Balmer said. The ANGEL Program stands for Animals Need to Give Everybody Love. Recently, the Little Traverse Bay Humane Society received a $3,600 grant from the Petoskey-Harbor Springs Area Community Foundation to help

support this program. Through “So many of the residents had continued support, Balmer visits pets at some point in their life local care facilities on a weekly or had to leave their pets when basis with a collection of puppies, they moved to Bay Bluffs. Petting kittens, dogs and cats. Molly brings back good memo“Since I am a certified pet ther- ries that they enjoy sharing with apist that specializes in geriatrics, me. I hear just wonderful stories the dog doesn’t have to be a ther- about their animals and their apy dog. This allows me to take lives. It is a good thing for all of responsibility for the animal and us and something Molly and I to make sure it has the right tem- hope to continue for many years,” perament for visits,” Balmer said. said Pfiefer, 65, a resident of HarThe benefits, explained Balmer, bor Springs. are twofold. By using shelter aniBoth women agree that owning mals, the pets receive special care a pet is beneficial for your health in preparation for the visit, which while offering companionship, includes special treats and a bath. which prevents loneliness or a And, both the residents and the feeling of isolation. animals are getting socialization. “Pets can keep you motivated, “People who love pets do so for active and alert. Dogs always a lifetime. They don’t stop just because they are getting older. Our visits are something out of their daily routine and a distraction. When you put a kitten in their arms, you can watch their smiles grow,” Balmer stated. It’s also a benefit for the animals. “Shelter dogs and cats benefit from getting out and visiting. Car rides, socialization and lots of affection make them happier, calmer and more adoptable,” Balmer said. Every week, Balmer picks out the animals to make the rounds. When she arrives, there are up to 15 residents waiting in the lobby for their visit. She travels to the Petoskey locations of Hiland Cottage, Independence Village, LockwoodMacDonald, Vital Care Adult Day Center and Bortz Health Care, and Bay Bluffs and Perry Farm Village, both in Harbor Springs. Each Tuesday afternoon, Pringle Pfiefer and her miniature poodle, Molly, join Balmer on her trip to Bay Bluffs, the Emmet County medical care facility.

need exercise. They lift your spirits. If you exercise with your pet, you’re also likely to reduce your risk of heart disease, control your weight and gain energy,” Balmer said. Pfiefer added, “The advantage to me of having a pet after age 50 is that we both love walking together and cover many miles of trails and sidewalks each week. Molly walks while I snowshoe in the winter, too. I love her company and it is fun knowing that we are both getting our exercise for the day.” For more information on the ANGEL Program, visit www.ltbhs.com or e-mail jbalmer@ltbhs.com. GL

GOODlife 17

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18 Your LIFE UP NORTH

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Good idea

Painting sanctuary By Melanie Leaver

n an art form the world’s greatest masters have called unpredictable, unexpected and spontaneous, Walloon Lake watercolor artist Joan Duval Tebo has found sanctuary. “It surprises you as you work — things happen — you aren’t painting alone,” Tebo said. “You are a conduit for a greater force.” Watching Tebo, 64, brush the canvas with an ease of grace, creating a harmonious symmetry on canvas with the environment she’s seeing, is in itself a soothing experience. “It’s what it does. It takes your mind off all of your other problems because you’re focused,” Tebo said. “If you’re in the sun, you might get burned. If you’re in the rain, you might get wet.” Her eyes rarely glancing down to see her work, Tebo’s left hand swirls and blends color with a life of its own. Wet colors run, mix and flow. She said this is why she rarely chooses to use an easel when creating and prefers to paint on flat surfaces. “It’s like doing a puzzle where you’re putting shapes on a page and you really don’t know until you’re done if those shapes make sense or if you’ve observed them correctly,” she said. In watercolor, improvisation is everything and seems to record an artist’s fleeting thoughts on paper. “When I’m painting, it’s always a surprise. I don’t have control. I’m letting go of that side of the brain, that controlling side,” she said. “You’re creating something even you hadn’t really thought about. I start without a vision of what it will look like in the end. “It’s thrilling and surprising what happens. You can be fascinated by the colors and how they work them20 Your LIFE UP NORTH

selves out of a piece of paper if you are willing to let it happen.” With her home poised on the highest point overlooking Walloon Lake’s shore, Tebo has a bounty of four-season beauty and a treetop view to inspire her. “This area is so full of beauty, and stunning,” she said. “I’m overwhelmed by nature’s unbelievable display. It’s always different, it’s always wonderful and amazing. I don’t know if I would be painting like this if I lived in the city.” A native of Lansing, Tebo’s desire to create began early with the help of art teachers who inspired, encouraged and supported. Tebo said of all the experiences she has had while creating pottery and painting for more than 20 years, a quote from a middle school art teacher has continued to fuel her passion for creating art and encouraging others to take the plunge. “An artist is not a special kind of person; every person is a special kind of artist,” she remembers him saying. “You were born to create and to solve problems, and if it’s not a paintbrush, it’s something else. Your outlet is your creative artistry, and we all need that outlet,” Tebo said. Tebo began her art career at Michigan State University, where she earned a Bachelor of Fine Arts degree in ceramics and went into a career in interior design, where she got her first lessons in watercolor. Tebo then went back to Michigan State to earn a master’s degree with

Joan Tebo paints at home

an emphasis in education. She became an elementary art teacher in the Gaylord Community Schools. On a skiing respite from teaching art, she met her husband, Art, at Boyne Mountain. He managed Boyne Highlands and eventually became the chief operating officer of Boyne USA. Tebo left her teaching career to accompany her husband in his work at Boyne USA. “I was a potter,” Tebo said, “and I was a potter until my children were born.” A fellow artist and friend introduced Tebo to the Walloon Art Club, and that was where she made her first forays into watercolor nearly 20 years ago. She also participates in the Kitchen Painters group at Crooked

Tree Arts Center in Petoskey, and various local plein air groups. She is also features at the WARD Gallery above Ciao Bella! in Petoskey. At first, Tebo noted she was hesitant to set aside her pottery and pick up a paintbrush. “I would tell my friends that I hadn’t made pottery in over a year,” she said. “And my friends said ‘Give it up — you aren’t a potter anymore, you’re a painter.’” Her art is now featured in a line of note cards with her favorite summer scene paintings, and Christmas cards with whimsical woodland animals celebrating the holidays in winter settings. Tebo continues to paint with the art club, which has been around for more than two generations. As she has honed her eye for watercolor, she added she has embraced the en plein air style of painting, which is a French expression that means ‘in the open air,’ and is used to describe the act of painting outdoors. “It doesn’t take a lot of tools or space.

You set up and you can paint in just a few minutes,” she said, “It’s easy and not like making pottery, where you need weeks and many steps.” The hardest part of watercolor, according to Tebo, is figuring where on the palette to start. “As a watercolor painter, it’s hard to look at the sunset and decide what color to start with — and there are never any two clouds that look alike,” she noted. For those who would like to pick up a paintbrush, Tebo goes back to the wisdom of her middle school art teacher and reiterated that everyone is a special kind of artist. She also recommended beginners not try to skimp on quality supplies. “When you start out you might try to start with inexpensive paper and inexpensive brushes,” she said, “but it really does make a difference.” Her unique experience as an elementary art teacher has also allowed her to see where many children lose faith in their creativity, Tebo said. “Everyone is born with an urge,

a need to be creative. It’s natural for a child to go through stages of awareness. When they come to the stage of realization around third or fourth grade, they’ll stop drawing when they think what they drew didn’t look like a real person,” she said. “Everyone can draw. It’s playing the game of looking at spacing and not reality, a matter of practice and focus.” Tebo added she has plans to explore working with another medium in the coming winter. “I have my oils at the ready, and like the painters of old, I thought I would start putting my favorite paintings into oil,” she said. Like at the beginning of a new painting, Tebo noted she cannot see where her art explorations may take her. But she can easily say that she has no regrets for the path her creative nature has taken her. “I’ve been blessed my whole life. All my dreams have come true and things are much better than I ever planned,” Tebo said. GL

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10 habits to make this year By Maggie Peterson

2011 is here, and with it a new year of possibilities. Here’s a look at 10 habits to make this year.

1. Embrace a positive attitude. For Dr. James J. Beno with Beno Clinic Chiropractic Center P.C. in Petoskey, employing a positive attitude is the single most important factor to health and life. “Whatever you do in life, all begins with a thought, and thoughts make up your feelings. And negative feelings can make you sick, and positive feelings can make you healthy,” he noted. It all starts the moment you wake up, he added, when you can set the tone for the day. Starting with the thought that it is going to be a good day is an easy first step. Beno noted people often know what they don’t want, but are less clear on what they do want. But focusing on what’s not wanted is highlighting the negative, he added. “If you don’t like your job or you don’t like your weight, your financial position or your health, you have to know what you want,” he said. Beno added that in his own life, he’s learned what he thinks is what he gets. “When you have an attitude of gratitude, more good things are going to come into your life,” he said. Related to this is the concept

22 Your LIFE UP NORTH

of mindfulness, noted Dr. Carin Nielsen, medical director of The Center for Optimal Health, newlyopened by Northern Michigan Regional Health System in Petoskey. The Center of Optimal Health is an integrative medicine and wellness center focused on integrating complementary therapies with Western medicine, and providing tools for lifestyle change. “Mindfulness focuses on being aware in the present moment. Unconscious thoughts, feelings and behaviors can significantly impact our emotional, physical and spiritual health,” Nielsen noted.

Dr. Carin Nielsen

A six-week course, “An Introduction to Mindfulness — A Method for Stress Reduction,” will be offered 6:30-8 p.m. Tuesdays beginning Jan. 18 at the Community Health Education Center located on the Northern Michigan Regional Hospital campus in Petoskey. The classes are offered through The Center for Optimal Health at Northern Michigan Regional Health System, and led by instructor Chris Frasz, MSW. “Through a mindfullness-based stress reduction class, participants have the opportunity to become more aware of their thoughts and feelings, and gain a greater awareness of the mind-body connection,” noted Dr. Carin Nielsen, medical director of The Center for Optimal Health. The course introduces various topics, such as examining the role stress and worry plays in one’s life, and using mindfulness-based techniques to reduce stress by re-focusing one’s perceptions and expectations. Various breathing and stretching exercises will also be incorporated into each one and a half hour session. The fee for the course is $100. Space is limited. To learn more or register, call The Center for Optimal Health at (231) 487-5700 or e-mail optimalhealth@northernhealth.org.

2. Get moving.

In addition to exercise, it’s important to move your body throughout the work “You have to move your body. The human body was just not designed to day. be sedentary and many things go wrong if you don’t move,” noted Maggie Maggie Daniels with North Central Daniels, R.N., director of North Central Michigan College Student and Michigan College Student and CommuCommunity Resource Center in Petoskey, certified medical exercise spe- nity Resource Center in Petoskey said it’s key to move in opposition to what you cialist and certified personal trainer. do at work, every hour. When you’re Lack of exercise can lead to any number of health problems, including constantly sitting or standing, it takes a range of motion loss in joints, muscle atrophy, poor circulation and poor toll on joint function and effects range mood, Daniels noted. of motion. “The big thing now is for people to find something that they like and can For desk jobs: sustain every day,” she said. — Get up and walk around. She suggested walking, starting with 10 minutes every day. If there’s a — Swing your arms in a figure eight. nearby stairway, walk up and down 10 times. If the weather is too severe — Lean your head back. to be outside, travel to a warm, safe environment. For standing jobs: “If you can walk, you can snowshoe. And if you can snowshoe, you can — Do comfortable knee bends to aid get outside and reap the benefits of vitamin D when there’s sun, fresh air circulation. which refreshes your mood, and you won’t be afraid of slipping on ice be— Bend forward and backward from cause snowshoes have spikes,” Daniels said, adding to start by going once a the hips, then side to side.

week, and work gradually up to three times a week.

3. Eat whole foods; watch portion sizes. Charlevoix Area Hospital registered dietitian Amanda Evans said eating whole foods and watching portion sizes go hand in hand. There are several theories out there about what it means to eat whole foods, ranging from only eating foods with five ingredients or less, and on to eating only foods that would be recognized by your grandmother or great-grandmother. No matter the axiom, the idea is the same — eat foods that resemble their natural state, Evans noted. An example is apples versus apple juice. With an apple, your body is getting all of the fiber and vitamins in the fruit. Apple juice, through its processing, is stripped of its fiber and some of those vitamins. It also generally has increased sugar. Evans noted there is currently a huge focus on fat-free foods and artificial sweeteners, but that often leads to portion issues. “When people switch to fat free or low fat, they tend to eat more,” she noted. This is can mean a higher calorie count with that increased consumption. Fat is also flavor, so “when you

take something out like the fat, you grams (of fiber each day),” she noted. have to replace it,” Evans added. This Advantages of fiber-rich diets inaddition is often sugar, which poses clude: its own problems. — Better gastrointestinal function To help prevent over-serving, Ev— Reduced constipation ans suggested reading the labels and — Decreased risk of disease, such sticking with suggested portion sizes. as diverticulitis and cancers, inAlso, a good rule of thumb is actually cluding colon cancer a rule of hand — the size of a balled — Healthy weight, as fiber is fist is roughly a cup, while what can filling be held in an open palm is roughly a The best way to determine fiber half-cup. A portion the size of a deck content is to read labels, and the easiof cards is about 3 ounces, which is a est way to boost fiber consumption suggested serving of protein. is to swap out processed foods for Daniels said that eating breakfast those with whole grain. is important for fueling the body, as “If you’re increasing your fiber, overnight the body has essentially you’re going to want to increase wafasted for 10 to 12 hours. She added ter (consumption). Otherwise, you’re that it’s important to keep breakfast going to be pretty constipated or gasfoods and carbohydrates whole, such sy,” Evans said, which brings up the as whole grain cereal or toast, oat- next habit to make this year.  meal and fruit. “Every move that you make and thought you think is fueled by carbohydrates,” she said.

4. Eat more fiber.

The benefits of increased fiber extend to just about all aspects of health. Evans said most people consume only 11 to 15 grams of fiber daily. “I always tell people to aim for 25 to 35

Amanda Evans, Charlevoix Area Hospital registered dietitian GOODlife 23

10 habits Continued from 23

Easy substitutions The product

On the label

White bread Up to 1 gram of fiber per serving (one slice of bread); flours on the ingredient list will be enriched and refined, with substitutions for removed vitamins and minerals

The product

On the label

Apple juice 0 grams of fiber; some vitamins and minerals; added sugars

The product

On the label

Red meat 0 grams of fiber; high in protein; can

The substitution On the label

Whole grain bread

The substitution On the label

Apple

On the label

White rice Up to 1 gram of fiber per serving

The product

On the label

Traditional pasta Up to 3 grams of fiber per serving

3 grams of fiber in an average apple; all vitamins and minerals

The substitution On the label

Beans

be high in fat

The product

S eek out 3 grams of fiber per serving (one slice of bread); look for “100 percent whole grain” or “100 percent whole wheat” on the package; the word “whole” will be listed on the ingredient list

6 to 8 grams of fiber per half-cup serving; high in protein; low fat or fat free

The substitution On the label

Brown rice

Up to 4 grams of fiber per serving

The substitution On the label

Whole wheat pasta Up to 6 grams of fiber per serving

*Fiber counts are averages, and may not reflect all nutrition labels.

5. Drink more water.

The majority of the population should be aiming to drink eight 8-ounce glasses of water daily. If you’re one of the many who don’t hydrate that much, take a gradual approach to increase water consumption, Evans noted. Stepping up water intake slowly will allow your body to adjust. The benefits of drinking more water include: — Enhanced immune system — Reduced dry skin — Reduced constipation — Decreased chance of dehydration — Healthy weight, as water can be filling “Our hunger and our thirst mechanisms are pretty similar,” Evans noted. “ ... You could be thirsty instead (of hungry). Grab 8 ounces of water first, wait 15 minutes and see how you feel.” She added that to make those eight 8 ounces count, they need to be pure water, not just beverages. For example, a cup of regular coffee has the opposite effect of water, as caffeine is actually a diuretic. For those who don’t like to drink water, Evans suggested adding a slice of lemon, lime or orange to give it a little more flavor. 24 Your LIFE UP NORTH

Daniels added that a glass of water should be drunk before coffee or tea in the morning, as the body has been deprived of hydration for many hours. Dehydration can lead to fatigue.

6. Establish a sleep routine. “Sleep is one of the most important factors you can do for your health,” Beno said. “It’s important to go to sleep at the same time and get up at the same time seven days a week.” Nielsen added that lack of sleep or lack of adequate sleep is a significant contributor to overall health problems. Adequate sleep makes for a healthier immune system, as well as allows you to more easily cope with and manage stress. “Sleep hygiene” is a term used in the medical profession to address sleeping habits, Nielsen said. Tips for good sleep hygiene are: —A void television an hour or two before going to bed. Substitute reading or listening to soft music. — Limit caffeine intake after noon. —L imit alcohol intake, which causes less restful sleep and early waking. — Get regular exercise.

7. Eat more fruits and vegetables. “Americans on the whole do not eat enough fruits and vegetables,” Nielsen said. “I instruct patients to aim for six to 10 servings a day.” Benefits to increased fruit and vegetable consumption include decreased risk of illness and disease. Also, filling up on produce means there is less room for processed and unhealthy foods. Nielsen noted general serving sizes are 1 cup of raw vegetables, 1/2 cup of cooked vegetables, or about the size of a medium apple. One suggestion for upping the count is to prepare vegetables ahead of time. Nielsen said it’s often hard to take the time to wash then slice up carrots and peppers when you’re looking for a snack, immediately. “If you don’t have a healthy alternative planned, you’re going to reach for potato chips,” she noted. Another tip is to just not buy the chips in the first place. When they’re not on hand, they’re not going into your body.

8. Avoid isolation; stay connected. Social connections and relationships can impact overall health; studies show when relationships are loving and strong, people live longer. “(Health is) not just about whether we have diseases or not, it’s about you as a whole person,” which goes beyond physical health into emotional and spiritual health, Nielsen said. She added that the importance of personal relationships and love to overall health and well-being are often overlooked in society. Daniels suggested telling those you love that you love them, and often. One way to avoid isolation and stay connected to others is to join in group activities. Citing just a few local sources, Nielsen suggested bowling leagues, church groups, knitting or bridge clubs, fitness classes, dance classes or Friendship Center gatherings. Or, to maintain connections already established, start a group of your own, such as a book club.

9. Step out of the comfort zone. Everyone has a bubble of comfort around them, comfort found in routine. But picking up a new habit is a way to challenge yourself, your mind and your horizons. “I think of January through March as a really hard time to be here,” Nielsen said. 

Jack Frank, of Harbor Springs, works out at the North Central Michigan College fitness center in Petoskey. GOODlife 25

10 habits Continued from 25

To help fight the doldrums, get out of the house. This is also a great time of year to try an activity you’ve not yet managed to cross off the to do list.

10. Reduce stress. Stress seems to be a fact of life, but decreasing it can lead to many health benefits. Nielsen said when bodies and minds are bombarded with stress, “It changes your body’s chemistry.” By decreasing stress, it allows for the body to have a healthier foundation, which in turn allows you to better cope with and manage stressful situations. Nielsen said when it comes to reducing stress, there are several avenues to explore. Suggestions include: — Meditation — Turning off the television — Limiting news exposure, especially if you worry a lot — Regular exercise — Eating well GL

Tom Deagostino, of Petoskey, stretches out at the North Central Michigan College fitness center in Petoskey.

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26 Your LIFE UP NORTH

Good cents

Which By Mark Lindsay

e all do our best to try to be prepared for our future and the future of our loved ones. There are two main vehicles for protecting your assets and providing for your loved ones after your death: wills and trusts. The first step in determining what is right for your particular needs is to visit with a professional. It’s likely you’ll find several in your local phone book or online, but be sure you contact one skilled in estate planning in particular. There are also ways to establish wills and trusts yourself, but if prepared incorrectly they can be worse

WILL work? than having none at all. “Having this in place will ensure An experienced lawyer will explain that the person you choose will be the various types of trusts available to there to consult and decide imporyou and help you choose the best way tant things for your future care or to provide for your care and protect the care of your family should you your assets. die,” he added. “Having this advocate In Northern Michigan there are eliminates the need for a living will in several, one being Petoskey-based at- most cases, and is the proper foundatorney John Ternes. Ternes suggests tion for your personal and financial you seek out an attorney, like himself, future plan.” who is certified through the state’s Michigan requires two doctors bar program for estate planners. and your designated patient advocate The first and most important step to jointly declare you unfit to make in estate planning is to establish a decisions for yourself. “designation of patient advocate,” ac“Additionally, you’ll want to precording to Ternes. This will allow pare a financial power of attorney,” someone you designate to make de- said Ternes. “This will allow for your cisions for you should you no longer financial matters to be cared for be able to. should you suffer from impaired 

GOODlife 27

Which WILL work? Continued from 27

mind function.” Many people who are victims of a stroke or diseases such as Alzheimer’s or Parkinson’s will benefit from having this in place. “This power of attorney is the second building block in a strong estate plan,” Ternes stated. The state of Michigan recognizes the term “personal representative” rather then “executor” for the purposes of wills and trusts; this will likely be the person you designate your power of attorney to. “Once you have these two things established through your attorney, you can decide how best to establish your will and trust,” Ternes said. “Having the proper foundation will assure that you’ll incur the least amount of fees and time needed to settle your estate.” According to Ternes, there are many different types of wills and trusts, and the effectiveness of each varies from state to state depending on their individual laws. The state of Michigan has very different laws regarding wills and trusts than many other states, and it is important that you take this into consideration when establishing your plan. “If you should own assets in a state other then Michigan, you’ll want to be aware of that state’s laws concerning your property and allow for that in your planning,” Ternes said. Even if you have a will, it is important to understand that your estate will still go through probate. Probate is the legal process an estate passes through to make sure property is distributed in accordance with a will or according to the laws of the state if there is no will. The probate process usually takes about a year or two to complete as the validity of the will must be established; all heirs, creditors and those who have a vested interest in 28 Your LIFE UP NORTH

the deceased’s property must be alerted of the decedent’s passing; and any disputes over the will must be resolved in probate court. John Ternes “Having only a will is very rare these days; however, everyone that we establish a trust for will also have a simple will,” Ternes noted. A pour-over will is a type of will that will work with a trust after your death, essentially stating that anything not provided for in your trust will fall into your trust in the event of your death. This avoids anything not specifically named in your trust accidentally from having to go through the probate process. “Most commonly we establish a living trust with a pour-over will,” said Ternes, adding, “This plan allows for complete control of your assets during your lifetime and effectively distributes them upon death.” A living trust is also revocable and confidential, whereas many other types can be irrevocable and made public by law. Another great reason to have a living trust is that you will avoid up to one-third of the normal fees associated with the probate process. “Many people don’t realize that the gift they’ve established in a will can be greatly diminished by costs and fees after their death,” Ternes noted. “An estate of $100,000 can be diminished by up to $10,000 (10 percent) or more depending on the time taken to settle it and the difficulty associated with it. “Having established a living trust, you can expect your fees and costs to be approximately 2 percent overall, a savings of up to 8 percent.” There are many other types of trusts available for specific needs, such as an especially large estate

(multi-million dollar) or the need for disabled dependent care after your death. Your attorney can assist you in choosing what will work best for you in special cases such as these. The important thing to remember is that it is far easier to establish a will and trust now than it will be when you actually need it, or for your family to settle your estate without them after your death. Ternes said, “We can establish a typical trust in approximately one to two weeks with little difficulty.” Having the trust in place will decrease the time to settle your estate after your death from two years of probate to eight months or less through your trust, according to Ternes. Each of us will have very different needs in planning for our future care, and the distribution of our assets upon our death. While it may seem overwhelming, the task is far less daunting when consulting with a skilled professional. GL To put it simply: A will is a form of document used to dispose of one’s belongings following your death. A living will is much different and is used to make medical decisions on your behalf should you become incapacitated. A basic trust is established to allow others to manage your property on your behalf and for your benefit, really having nothing to do with age, medical condition or death benefit. A living trust is established during one’s lifetime to allow for the care of one’s property while you’re alive, with specific instructions for the disposal of property upon one’s death, primarily in order to avoid probate, fees and taxes. Each of these basic documents has many different variations and uses depending on the attorney, state of residence and individual goals. Most commonly in Michigan, a living trust with a pour-over will is established because they simply work the best within the law structure.

Good samaritan

Denise Schlitt of Charlevoix (right) with her Little Sister By Melissa Frugé

or the last 50 years, Big Brothers Big Sisters has been providing hope and guidance for children who could be considered at risk in the community. But after so many years, volunteers are still needed to help make a difference in Charlevoix and Emmet counties. “We need to raise awareness,” explained program director Gary Swaney. “We are a donor-driven organization; we receive no money from the state or federal governments.” Swaney said they rely heavily on the United Way, private donations and Petoskey’s Arts and Crafts Fair for funding. Nearly 80 children have been matched with a mentor through the program this year in the Petoskey area, but many more are in need of a Big Brother or Big Sister. Since the organization places an adult in a child’s life to promote positive changes, the application process for potential mentors is very in depth and requires a lot of time and effort by case managers. “The case managers are critical. They are the support piece,” said Swaney. After filling out an application,

Become a mentor

prospective Bigs will undergo a rigorous background check and lengthy interview with a Big Brothers Big Sisters case manager. The case manager carefully screens the applicants and then determines which child they would be best matched with. Before the Big meets his or her Little, they meet with the case manager and child’s parent or guardian to make sure everyone has the same goals and expectations. If the parent feels comfortable with the match, the Big finally meets their Little. The case manager will follow up periodically with everyone involved to make sure the match is beneficial and progressing. On average it costs $1,000 for a child to be matched with a mentor for one year and according to Swaney they operate well under that number. Right now there are only four case managers serving the eight counties covered by Big Brothers Big Sisters of Northwest Michigan. Swaney said the case manager is critical in ensuring the success of a Big and Little match. The program started in Petoskey in 1960 and eventually grew to include Antrim, Benzie, Charlevoix, Grand Traverse, Kalkaska, Leelanau and Manistee counties. For budgetary reasons, general operations were

consolidated in the 1980s and now operate from Traverse City. Executive director Cecilia Chesney said they are very interested in creating a Char-Em Resource and Advocacy Committee in order to help more children and become a greater presence in the community. The committee of four to 10 people would meet once a month and discuss ways to support fundraisers in the area, identify potential mentors and act as a resource for the board of directors. Usually a concerned parent will contact the organization about their child. Then the Big Brothers Big Sisters program begins looking for a mentor. “They are consciously making the decision to better their child,” said Swaney. Another way Big Brothers Big Sisters has been able to reach out is through their school-based program. The organization works with school districts to provide time during the school year when mentors can come to the school and spend time with the children. Swaney said it’s a more economic option for Big Brothers Big Sisters because during school hours there are more resources, teachers and aides available to help monitor and  GOODlife 29

Big Brothers Big Sisters Continued from 29

facilitate the connections between Bigs and Littles. Case managers can manage more relationships without overextending themselves. Swaney said the school-based program also works well for people who want to help but don’t have lots of free time because the program only takes place when school is in session. There is a set time during the month when Bigs and Littles get together and take part in more structured activities. Plus some businesses find it’s an easy way to participate. Swaney said some give their employees time during the work week to go to the schools and take part in the program in addition to helping financially. Teachers recommend students they think would benefit from having a mentor. The application process for potential Bigs remains the same, but high school students can participate if they choose (the home based program requires volunteers to be at least 18 years old and have reliable transportation). “It’s a great way to get teens involved and they can learn as well about giving back to the community,” said Swaney. “There is a ripple effect,” added Chesney. Currently only Shay Elementary School in Harbor Springs participates in the Big Brothers Big Sisters school program. Swaney and Chesney said they are very interested in reaching out to other schools in the area, especially Charlevoix. If you are interested in becoming a Big Brother or Big Sister or starting a Char-Em Resource and Advocacy Committee contact Cecilia Chesney at (231) 946-2447. More information can also be found at www.bigsupnorth.com.

A mentor’s perspective

Sometimes the biggest impact comes from the smallest action. Think about throwing a pebble in the water and the ripples it creates. 30 Your LIFE UP NORTH

Mentoring a child can be like that. “You can’t be afraid to get involved,” said Denise Schlitt, 57, of Charlevoix. Schlitt has been volunteering with Big Brothers Big Sisters since August 2008. “It’s a commitment you take very seriously,” she said. Schlitt applied to the program in June 2008 but had to wait several months for the perfect match to be made. A case manager interviewed her and conducted a home inspection. Once Schlitt was accepted, she was given a 36-page manual from Big Brothers Big Sisters and periodically meets with a case manager to discuss her relationship with her Little and the improvements she has seen in her. Gary Swaney, program director for Big Brothers Big Sisters of Northwest Michigan, said it’s so important to know someone other than a parent cares about the child’s well-being. Think about a coach or neighbor who took an interest in your life and just listened or opened you up to new experiences. “It’s not about a mentor trying to fix things. It’s about enhancing (the child’s life),” he said. “It’s really important to be a positive role model,” said Schlitt. “A mentor is an individual who provides guidance and support without criticism and judgment to promote the importance of positive values and self-worth.” Schlitt meets with her Little Sister, who is now 12, about twice a month and the things they do vary. She said sometimes they go to the movies, play board games, take the dogs for a walk, and in the summer they spend time at the lake. But Schlitt says its not just about having fun, it’s support for a better life. Sometimes they talk about school and homework and what the future could hold for her Little Sister. She keeps pictures of her Little around the house so when she visits she knows Schlitt is always thinking about her and she is a part of her life. “The desire to give back, it’s selfish, but it makes you feel good,” said

Schlitt. “You made someone happy today.” Schlitt also has a good relationship with her Little’s mother, who contacted the program when her daughter was 9. “It makes her feel like there is someone else she can rely on. It’s been very beneficial and a positive experience,” the girl’s mother said. Swaney says there are 40 key assets everyone needs to be successful in life. The Big Brothers Big Sisters program has focused on about 21 they know Bigs can help their Littles achieve and can measure, such as self-confidence, classroom behavior and trust. Each year parents, teachers and mentors are polled about improvements they have seen in the children participating with Big Brothers Big Sisters. Swaney said locally, they were able to see an 83 percent improvement in self-confidence among the Littles, relationships with other adults improved by 69 percent and their attitudes toward school improved by 60 percent. Nationally the program outcomes show children who participate in the program are 46 percent less likely to use illegal drugs and all show improvements academically. The time commitment for a Big Brother or Big Sister is relatively small, just a few hours a month for at least six months. According to Swaney, most relationships between a Big and Little last between three to five years. “A lot of people wonder ‘What do I have to offer?’” said executive director Cecilia Chesney. “The answer is a lot. You don’t have to be a superstar to change someone’s life.” The effects of having a mentor can last a lifetime. Years after her experience with Big Brothers Big Sisters, a young Petoskey woman wrote that her mentor was her hero. Her refusal to give up, encouragement and support were exactly what she needed to succeed in life. “I think if anyone is looking for a way to enrich their lives, then becoming a volunteer for Big Brothers Big Sisters is a great way to start,” said Schlitt. GL

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