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december 19-25 2013 NOW

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NOW december 19-25 2013

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CONTENTS

RAFFI

#BELUGAGRADS CONCERT SAT FEB 01 1PM & 4PM • RTH

DANNY MICHEL FRI, DEC 20 9PM • TGH

Proceeds benefit the Centre for Child Honouring

FRIDAY NIGHT!

Photo by Matt Hoyle Contour by Getty Images

TUE, DEC 31 2013 7:30PM • MH Hosted By

63 HOLIDAY MOVIE SPECIAL

64 Interviews Ben Stiller (above), Will Ferrell and the Coen brothers give us the lowdown on Walter Mitty, Anchorman 2 and Inside Llewyn Davis 70 Reviews Her; American Hustle; Mandela: Long Walk To Freedom; Good Vibrations; Maidentrip; Walking With Dinosaurs; and more

JEREMY HOTZ Starring: JESSICA KIRSON & MIKE MACDONALD

10 NEWS

12 Ed Snowden Person of the Year 16 Fordian Xmas Makes you wanna puke Internet cops Queen shooting goes viral 18 Food bank diary Losing it on a can of tuna 14 Stintz’s record It’s broken 20 First person Christ-mas for Christ-ians

22 DAILY EVENTS

Also Featuring: JOHN HASTINGS, GRAHAM KAY, DAVE MERHEJE, DARCY MICHAEL, ALEX PAVONE, CHRISTINA WALKINSHAW

25 GIFT GUIDE

And The Musical Stylings Of: JAYMZ BEE & BONZAI SUZUKI

25 Keep on shopping Let NOW’s last gift guide of 2013 tip you to perfect presents for the slacktivist on your list, plus more great gifts at all price points

TICKETS MAKE GREAT GIFTS! Ron White Thu Jan 16 8pm MH • Craig Ferguson Thu Jan 23 7pm MH Classic Albums Live: The Beatles, Abbey Road Fri Jan 31 8pm RTH An Acoustic Evening with Lyle Lovett & John Hiatt Sat Feb 1 8pm MH National Geographic Live: Joel Sartore, Photographer Grizzlies, Piranhas & Man-Eating Pigs Mon Feb 24 & Tue Feb 25 8pm RTH The Spring Quartet: Jack DeJohnette • Joe Lovano Esperanza Spalding & Leo Genovese Thu Feb 27 8pm MH Matt Andersen Sat Mar 1 8pm MH Can’t decide? GIFT CERTIFICATES redeemable for all events at Massey Hall & Roy Thomson Hall.

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DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

SoundboardTO SOUNDBOARD.CA

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36 LIFE&STYLE

36 Astrology 37 Ecoholic Planet-friendly toys, DIY gifts and more

38 FOOD&DRINK

38 Reviews P&L Burgers, Toma Burger Addiction 39 Recently reviewed 40 Drink up!

Contact NOW

189 Church Street, Toronto, ON M5B 1Y7, tel 416-364-1300.

EDITOR/PUBLISHER

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GENERAL MANAGER

Michael Hollett

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Senior News Editor Ellie Kirzner Senior Entertainment Editor Susan G. Cole Associate Entertainment Editor/Stage & Film Glenn Sumi Associate News Editor Enzo DiMatteo Food Editor Steven Davey Music Editor Julia LeConte Fashion and Design Writer Sabrina Maddeaux Senior Writers Jon Kaplan (Theatre), Norman Wilner (Film) On-line News Writer Ben Spurr Staff News Writer Jonathan Goldsbie Entertainment/Music Contributer Carla Gillis Contributors Elizabeth Bromstein, Andrew Dowler, Sarah Parniak, David Jager, Robert Priest, Wayne Roberts, Adria Vasil Copy Editing/Proofreading Francie Wyland, Fran Schechter, Julia Hoecke, Katarina Ristic, Lesley McAllister

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Classifieds Sales Phone 416-364-3444 or email classifieds@nowtoronto.com

Adult Classifieds Sales Phone 416-364-1500

ONLINE

42 MUSIC

This week’s top five most-read posts on nowtoronto.com

G

42 The Scene A$AP Ferg, Andy Kim Christmas Show, U.S. Girls and Blonde Elvis , Beyoncé 43 Roundup Best holiday shows, best holiday tracks 45 Roundup The week in dance parties 46 Club & concert listings 47 Interview Wolfcow 48 T.O. Notes 50 Interview Cirkut 53 Album reviews

54 NEW YEAR’S GUIDE 54 Party planner All the shows and parties ringing in 2014

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Lists! Lists! Lists! If you like all the year-end lists, you’ll love that we’ll have even more lists online.

D

58 From stage to page Gifts for the theatre and comedy lover on your list 59 Comedy CD review Glen Foster’s Prickly; Theatre listings 60 Theatre reviews Special Constables; Weather The Weather ; Dance listings 61 Comedy listings

62 ART

Review We’re In The Library Must-see galleries and museums

62 BOOKS Review We Are Water Readings

“Fun fact: Rob Ford can dance better than all of us”

Holiday Movie Guide Playing this week Film times Indie & rep listings Plus winners of Toronto Film Critics Awards Blu-ray/DVD Kick-Ass 2; Prisoners; Adore; Ghost Team One

Crossword Employment Rentals/real estate

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your iPad with our slick app. Download free from iTunes! eReader Flip through NOW Magazine on your favourite tablet with our ePub edition.

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NOW is available free of charge in the city of Toronto and selected locations throughout the GTA, limited to one copy per reader. NOW may be distributed only by NOW Communications’ authorized distributors or news agents.

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85 CLASSIFIED 85 85 86

“On the 16th anniversary of Chris Farley dying, crack addict mayor Rob Ford had a dance party on TV. Farley’s spirit lives!! #toosoon #RIP” “Watching Rob Ford dance is like seeing a unicorn in real life”

63 MOVIES 63 76 81 83 84

On Tuesday, Rob Ford and other councillors stopped a meeting to dance.

Because why the hell not, right?

3.933" x 7.444" BW NP

THE WEEK IN TWEETS

58 STAGE

Size:

1. Death Of A Mayor Tender and tasteless, the new Rob Ford video from Taiwan has to be seen to believed.

2. Up all night to Soknacki Jonathan Goldsbie on how mayoral hopeful David Soknacki plays the long game.

3. Rob Ford does a thing Beleaguered mayor shows up in church, “dances,” makes news.

4. Back to court Toronto Star reporter takes libel action against Rob Ford.

5. An honest plea Please stop trying to review Mr. Peter Jackson’s Hobet 2: Smog. It’s embarrassing.

To: Me From: Me

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12/3/13 10:44 A

December 19 - January 2 Sunday

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

19

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the surprise performers ­continues at Adelaide Hall.

Doors 8:30 pm. $25. RT, SS. venus in fur Canadian Stage’s hit production of the sexy two-hander about a playwright looking for his leading lady returns in the much more intimate Berkeley Street ­Theatre. To Dec 29. 7 pm. $29$59. 416-368-3110.

to see the photo­grapher’s ­pensive portraits at O’Born.

Free. 416-413-9555.

Skydiggers The long-running roots rock band plays a pair of holiday shows, with the Devin Cuddy Band. Horseshoe. 10 pm. $27.50. TF. And Dec 21. +inside llewyn davis The Coen brothers’ atmospheric film set in New York City’s folk music scene opens today.

26

27

Jason Collett’s Basement Revue The music series with

Jason Collett surprises, Dec 19

22

Kanye West/Kendrick Lamar

Yeezus makes up for his cancelled November shows with two dates at the Air ­Canada Centre. 7:30 pm. $51.75$162.25. TM. And Dec 23. +WEATHER THE WEATHER Haley McGee’s new all-ages play about getting home for the holidays continues at ­Evergreen Brick Works until Dec 30. 8 pm. $12.50-$32. 416504-7529.

Skydiggers rock the holiday tunes at the Horseshoe, Dec 20 and 21

Kanye West makes good, Dec 22

23

25

John McDermott Fans of the Scottish-Canadian’s takes on Christmas classics will want to head to Hugh’s Room for a matinee or evening show. 2 and 7:30 pm. $40-$45. HR. the little mermaid: ­ontario’s o-fish-al family musical Ross Petty’s holiday

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THE NUTCRACKER Enjoy a matinee of the National Ballet of Canada’s sumptuous prod­ uction of the seasonal classic on Christmas Eve day. 1 pm. $45-$130. Four Seasons ­Centre. 416-345-9595.

THE WOLF OF WALL STREET After

unwrapping your ­prezzies, take in Leonardo DiCaprio and Jonah Hill in Martin Scorsese’s film about greed and excess in the 1990s. Opening day.

panto continues at the Elgin until Jan 4. 2 pm. $27-$85.

1-855-599-9090.

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30

31

1

The indie folk bands play a fundraiser for the Daily Bread Food Bank. 918 Bathurst.

Doors 7:30 pm. $20 and nonperishable food item. RT, SB, SS.

hosts the soul singer’s It’s New Year’s Eve show. 8:30 pm. $10$12. HR.

new year with the rollicking twang-rockers? Horseshoe.

11:15 pm and 1:15 am. $25. RT, SS, TF. once Spend New Year’s Eve with this warm-hearted Tony Award-winning musical about a Dublin busker and a Czech emigrée. 2 and 8 pm. To Jan 5 at the Royal Alexandra. $35$130. 416-872-1212.

frigid lake and raise money for Habitat for Humanity. Noon.

Donation. Sunnyside Beach, Lake Shore W at Parkside. torontopolarbear.com. the visitor Giulio Paradisi’s cult horror classic starring Lance Henriksen, Shelley ­Winters, Franco Nero and even directors John Huston and Sam Peckinpah continues its run at the TIFF Bell Lightbox. 9:30 pm. $13. 416-599-TIFF.

The Wooden Sky/Nick Ferrio

Andria Simone Hugh’s Room

the musical of musicals, the musical! The musical told in the individual styles of five well-known ­composers continues at the Panasonic. 2 and 7 pm. To Jan 5. $19-$79. 416872-1212.

The Sadies Why not ring in the

Polar bear DIP Wade into the

Death From Above 1979 Celebrate Boxing Day with the reunited noise rock two-piece.

Danforth Music Hall. Doors 8 pm, all ages. $33.50-$39.50. RT, SS, TM. tea at the palace Perennially popular puppeteers Ann and David Powell’s charming show (for ages five and up) intertwines two medieval Russian folktales. At Tarragon Extra Space to Dec 29. 2 pm. $20$25. 416-531-1827.

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December 19-25 2013 NOW

What’s In The Box The annual

music fest of five bands for five bucks over five nights continues, w/ Alvvays, Solids and others. Drake Underground.

Doors 7 pm. $5. To Dec 30. 416531-5042. elizabeth-darcy This twoperson­adaptation of Jane Austen’s­Pride And Prejudice runs to Dec 29 at Campbell House. 2 and 8 pm. $20. totix.ca.

21

Kensington Market Solstice Lantern-lit procession through

the Market features giant ­puppets and performances. 7 pm. Free. Oxford and Augusta. redpepperspectacle. wordpress­.com.

Zeds Dead Local electronic heroes bring their Altered States tour to Sound Academy.

Doors 10 pm. $20. SS, TW.

28

+We’re In The Library Savvy group show celebrates school libraries, at the Koffler Gallery, to Jan 19. Free. 647-925-0643.

Ensemble Polaris The Arctic fusion ensemble performs Definitely Not The Nutcracker.

918 Bathurst. 7:30 pm. $10$20. ensemblepolaris.com. parfumerie The beloved play about two bickering shop clerks who are u ­ nknowingly corresponding with each other closes today at the Young Centre. 1:30 and 7:30 pm. $51-$68.

416-866-8666.

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FIRST THURSDAYs The AGO teams up with the Long Winter crew for an artist bazaar, artist interviews, a set by DJ Stelmanis and more. 7 pm, $12$15. ago.net.

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• RTH – Roy Thomson Hall/Glenn Gould/Massey Hall • SC – Sony Centre For The Performing Arts • SS – Soundscapes • TCA – Toronto Centre For The Arts • TM – Ticketmaster • TMA – Ticketmaster Artsline • TW – TicketWeb

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NOW december 19-25 2013

7

Invisibility and ­reconciliation

email letters@nowtoronto.com

Check out what Toronto designers have in store.

Find Toronto shops that carry locally designed products at:

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december 19-25 2013 NOW

“ While she would be a good choice, Olivia Chow has to ask herself what possible advantage there is to being mayor of­ Toronto.”

Does Olivia Chow run add up to a mistake?

Olivia Chow has to ask herself what possible advantage there is to being mayor of Toronto (NOW, December 12-​ 18). And it’s an important factor to consider. No one mentions it.

The city is in a mess, as the experi­ ence with Rob Ford has proved. A To­ ronto mayor basically has less politi­ cal power than counterparts in other cities.

Furthermore, city council is frac­ tious and indecisive. That will not change after the next election. Hous­ ing is a mess. Massive infrastructure rehabilitation is needed because the best-before dates on the water, sewer and road systems have expired. Tran­ sit is on life support.

All that costs more than the city can afford, so the funding must come from the federal and provincial gov­ ernments. Chow is already in Ottawa and as a veteran MP can get more funding than an inexperienced MP. While she would be a good choice to win the job, really it would be a critical political mistake, and more so on a personal basis.

Gord Campbell From nowtoronto.com

Lead missing in Island airport toxic mix

The Island Airport: Hazardous To To­ ronto’s Health (NOW, December 12-​18) was quite good.

But it’s possible that a major impact is being missed. In January of this year, Mother Jones, a leading pro­ gressive U.S. magazine, wrote that a great deal of fuel for light piston-​pow­ ered planes remains laced with anti-​ knock lead.

Lead is a pernicious neurotoxin that’s also heavy and tends to fall ​out pretty quickly, so like the chromium VI profiled, there’s likely to be far more of it near the emission source.

Lead profiles from the Gardiner dem­ onstrate this. But we seem to have missed worrying about lead, which is wrong.

Once we led the world on climate with something called the Toronto Target, now a bit of a joke as all our emissions have soared, and we can’t blame Stephen Harper for it all.

Hamish Wilson Toronto

Porter sign language

A sidebar to Porter’s campaign to fly jets out of the Island airport: A few weeks ago I put a NoJetsTO sign on my front lawn. A few days later, one of Porter’s signs (I’m On Board) appeared on my next-door neighbour’s lawn. A few days after that, it was gone.

The moral of this story: When you see one of Porter’s signs on someone’s lawn, be aware that it may represent the opinions of the people who live in the house – or it may not.

Elizabeth Block Toronto

Thanks to Susan G. Cole for her review of The Prime Ministers: The Pio­neers (NOW, December 12-​18). She pointed out, along with most reviewers, that the film disappeared the 750,000 Pal­ estinians who were exiled along with those who became Israeli citizens.

An article about the film in Israeli daily Haaretz said the documentary “unintentionally explains the Israeli-​ Palestinian dynamic” that renders Pal­estinians invisible, adding that “un­derstanding the power of in­ visibil­ity might ultimately be an im­ portant step to reconciliation.”

Austin Whitten Toronto

Hoosier Daddy’s BBQ takes a grilling

I just wanted to take a moment to say thank you to Steven Davey for his re­ view of Hoosier Daddy’s BBQ (NOW December 12-​18).

I know it may seem strange for someone whose establishment re­ ceived a two-N rating to be writing in gratitude, but let me explain.

Unfortunately, we completely pooched the location. We were count­ ing on 4,000 OCAD U students to make up the bulk of our customer base, but that has been slow going.

Right now we are only doing about half the business we estimated.

Our biggest obstacle has been get­ ting people to realize we exist. We’ve been operating since June, and peo­ple from the neighbourhood still come in and ask us when we opened.

Your review and the publicity we can generate from it might get us an additional eight to 10 customers a day.

So I’m sincerely grateful that you took the time to review us and give us some print space.

As for the pie, come back in and try our sugar cream sometime. You’ll be blown away!

Kevin Hogg (yes, that’s my name) Toronto

Star sets record straight on McQuaig

In the second paragraph of The Rose­ dale Plutocracy (NOW, December 12-​ 18), Roselyn Loren talks about “the To­ ronto Star’s endorsement of [Chry­stia] Freeland” in the recent Toronto Cen­ tre by-election, “embracing” Free­land and “turning its back on one of its own,” Linda McQuaig.

This is news to me, since the Star did not endorse a candidate in that by-election – neither Freeland nor Mc­ Quaig nor anyone else.

Loren goes on to say that the Star did fulfill its “ethical obligation” by featuring both candidates in individ­ ual interviews (true) and then criti­ cizes at length a column by David Ol­ ive in the business section on November 23.

The gist of the argument (if I can follow it) seems to be that Olive’s col­ umn was some kind of backhanded or veiled endorsement of Freeland. In fact, a plain reading of it shows no connection to the by-election at all.

If we had wanted to endorse Free­

land, we would have done so. The wri­ ter doesn’t even attempt to argue that the Star’s news coverage was biased against McQuaig. On the contrary.

Andrew Phillips Editorial page editor Toronto Star

Why is Rob Ford afraid to talk to the police?

Letter-​writer Richard Wing thinks NOW is “playing a mug’s game,” i.e., wasting everyone’s time by expect­ing Rob Ford to answer a few questions (NOW, December 12-​18). Police would like to know why he was seen acquir­ ing what looks like drugs, and why drug dealers were overheard dis­ cussing his offering them $5,000 and a car for the return of a video showing him smoking crack. Yes, he has the right to remain silent, and of course, this upstanding citizen doesn’t “throw his friends under the bus” – the friend in this case being convicted felon San­ dro Lisi.

Ford isn’t an everyday perp. What part of “Why is the mayor of Toronto afraid to talk to police?” doesn’t Wing understand?

John Kneeland Hamilton

BAY BLOOR RADIO’S

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Black attack ageist in its thinking

Your newspaper’s commercial and ethical vision statement about creat­ ing “media rich in integrity and craft in the interest of social transforma­ tion” was undermined by John Sem­ ley’s tone in Conrad Black out-​Mans­ bridges Mansbridge (NOW, December 9).

While ostensibly discussing the weaknesses of Black’s interview on Zoomer TV with Rob Ford, Semley made derogatory comments about older people. According to Semley, Black “delights in having a platform to propagate his own slouched, wilted image, mugging for the camera look­ ing like a California Raisin.”

And Semley’s misguided attempt at solidarity-building with NOW read­ ers who missed the interview – “Maybe you are under one zillion years of age” – reveals the larger pat­ tern of his thinking. Consequently, Zoomer TV’s promotional catch­ phrase, “television for boomers with zip,” is dismissed by Semley as “a tag­ line too hilarious to even begin to parse.”

Brant Downey Calgary NOW welcomes reader mail. Address letters to: NOW, Letters to the Editor, 189 Church, Toronto, ON M5B 1Y7. Send e-mail to letters@nowtoronto.com and faxes to 416-364-1166. All correspondence must include your name, address and daytime phone number. Letters may be edited for length.

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As a long-time fan, I just wanted to say thanks for the Kids in the Hall article (NOW, December 5-​11). The sweater colours and positioning of the guys on the cover brought to mind the Olympic Rings. Intentional or not, they’re certainly deserving of a gold medal when it comes to comedy. It’s time to see more of them!

Sandra Duff Toronto

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newsfront

Michael Hollett EDITOR/PUBLISHER Alice Klein EDITOR/CEO pam stephen general manager ellie kirzner senior news editor Published every thursday by now communications inc 189 Church Street, Toronto, ON., M5B 1Y7 telephone 416-364-1300 fax 416-364-1166 e-mail news@nowtoronto.com ONLINE www.nowtoronto.com

Gas tax per litre proposed by the premier’s Transit Investment Strategy Advisory Panel to raise cash for transit. That’s an average $85 a year in added gas costs for drivers a year if you drive a Civic.

The big idea: expand the transit network and increase by 1 million people the number living within a 10-minute walk of transit. The theory is that will entice more people to use transit and give two-​car families the option of getting rid of one car and saving money in the process.

10

December 19-25 2013 NOW

“Until my electorate says they’re not going to vote for me, this mouth is going to keep talking.”

Councillor Giorgio Mammoliti inadvertently foreshadows his political demise. Besides an audit of his campaign finances and the integrity commissioner’s investigation of a $5,000-a-table summer fundraiser, news of $25,000 in taxpayer-​supported renos to his constituency office also surfaced this week.

Behaviour that might seem sort of odd in anyone else becomes part of the pattern of consistent out-thereness when it comes to Rob Ford, all pointing to the conclusion that he’s, well, at the very least, one very hard-to-predict guy. The latest Ford video making the rounds was filmed Sunday at the West Toronto Church of God on Wilson, which is described online as a “very dynamic Church of God.” Watching it, you half expect Ford to backflip down the aisle like John Belushi in The Blues Brothers. This would be unremarkable, if not for the fact that it’s Rob Ford, and also because of the reports coming in from parishioners via social media that the mayor smelled like ganja.

It was a weird scene. Not the dancing that broke out on the council floor, but the two-step at that presser called by Public Works committee chair Denzil Minnan-Wong and Mayor Rob Ford to bring us up to speed on how great privatized garbage collection under GFL has been for the city. Reality is there are just as many “service requests” (aka complaints) in Districts 1 and 2 as in the east end, where curbside collection is carried on in-house. As for those promised cost savings, the city had to fork over an extra $1.4 million to GFL for cleanup related to the July storm. Apparently, emergency pickup costs are not covered by the contract.

Enzo DiMatteo

5�

Mammo-gram Ford high on God Trash Talk

Cheol Joon Baek

Paul till

Santa Speedo Run, the “cheeky” annual dash through the snow for SickKids’ toys and game fund, takes Bloor-Yorkville by storm Saturday, December 14. Slide show of the slippery fun at nowtoronto.com

“The exhibit gets inside of you.”

LOS ANGELES REVIEW OF BOOKS

Barometer PARKDALE COMMUNITY FOOD BANK The west-end food depot reopens after a month of renovations. And six new refrigerators were donated by “Santa Claus.” In a perfect world we wouldn’t need food banks.

(Read about the food bank diet challenge on page 18.)

“Homegrown director gets a bloody good tribute.”

NOW MAGAZINE

“... most ambitious, and certainly most grotesque.”

TORONTO LIFE

“It is a sterling example of how interesting such an exhibit could and should be.”

STAR REVENGE The mayor’s qualified apologia to Star reporter Daniel Dale for insinuating he’s a pedophile in a December 10 interview with Conrad Black is thrown right back in the mayor’s face. Dale will proceed with his libel suit. nowtoronto.com

PRETTY CLEVER FILMS

JASON KENNEY The employment minister’s invective-laced dust-up with Jim Flaherty over the Ford scandal – Kenney has said Ford should resign – raises talk of Kenney as a possible leadership contender to succeed Stephen Harper. The whispers about the PM’s future are growing louder.

GOOD WEEK FOR BAD WEEK FOR

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THINK TORONTO’S INDEPENDENT WEEKLY DECEMBER 5–11, 2002 ISSUE 1090 VOL. 22 NO. 14

SCANDAL G When NOW sat down +HEARIN U.S. ARMS DEALERS TARGET CANADA to talk about the ex+ INSIDE T.O.’S SLAUGHTER HOUSES hilarating Adaptation K-OS MELLOWS + MARIANNE with Spike Jonze and FAITHFULL’S REGRETS + collaborators Charlie YVONNE NG MOVES UP Kaufman and Nicolas Cage, Jonze was writer Kaufman’s SPIKE JONZE’S go-to director. Jonze is penning his own scripts now, including the one for Her, which, like his Kaufman collaborations, goes to some very strange places. The story of a guy who falls in love with his operating system just copped the Toronto Film Critics Award for best screenplay. See review, page 70.

Use the searchable viewer online at nowtoronto.com/archives

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www.nowtoronto.com

From the archives December 5, 2002 On the cover

CEO Ian Troop gets the axe over “leadership” issues. Was it billing taxpayers $1.89 for Starbucks tea while raking in $400K that irked Premier Kathleen Wynne? Or the $1.1 billion (so far) in cost overruns for the Games?

SCAPEGOATING POVERTY

Industry Minister James Moore posits the question: “Is it the government’s job, my job, to feed my neighbour’s child?” and answers with a resounding no. Turns out most Canadians disagree.

THE YEAR’S BEST AMERICAN MOVIE ����� Moore later apologizes too late, though, to undo the reality of just how out of touch the HarperCons have become. electron

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CLEAN TRAINS NDP MPP Jonah Schein’s bill to electrify the Union Pearson Express Air-Rail Link now, instead of waiting years under the Liberal plan, goes down in 36-24 vote. But the battle continues.

Volunteer Opportunities of the Week • College-Montrose Children’s Place • East Scarborough Boys and Girls Club • Humber Community Seniors’ Services • Warden Woods Community Centre For details on these opportunities, see this week’s Classified section or visit volunteertoronto.ca everything toronto.

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Classifieds NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

11

MEDIOCRACY

EDWARD SNOWDEN SUPERSTAR THERE ARE TWO PEOPLE WHO REPRESENT WHAT SEEMED A LOUSY YEAR. ROB FORD IS THE OTHER ONE.

By JOHN SEMLEY

I

n their write-up naming Pope Francis (“The People’s Pope”) their magazine’s Person of the Year, Time writers Howard ChuaEoan and Elizabeth Dias sum up the thorny complications at the heart of papal authority.

“The papacy is mysterious and magical,” they write. “It turns a septuagenarian into a superstar while revealing almost nothing about the man himself. And it raises hopes in every corner of the world – hopes that can never be fulfilled, for they are irreconcilable. The elderly traditionalist who pines for the old Latin Mass and the devout young woman who wishes she could be a priest both have hopes. No Pope can make them all happy at once.”

Apart from the obvious fix to the false problem the authors raise (i.e., an old Latin Mass delivered by a female priest), Chua-Eoan EDWARD and Dias are essentially SNOWDEN right. The Roman Catholic Church counts some 1.2 biljohn lion members. And you semley’s can’t please all of them all PeRson oF The the time. But if the job has yeAR its challenges, that doesn’t make it some sort of contradiction in terms.

Francis poses an interesting tension for Catholics, lapsed Catholics, church observers, commentators and other pope buffs. He represents the promise of reform and growth for an institution that seems resiliently, maybe even inherently, resistant to change. Photos of him donning a red nose to clown around with a newlywed couple, posing for Instagram shots with worshippers and sportingly accepting a hug from a small boy who clambered onstage as the pontiff delivered a speech last week are all heartwarming enough. Such gestures prove that Francis is on the verge of becoming a full-on meme, an apostolic Chris Hadfield.

But for Time to name him Person of the Year is a laugh.

The gesture serves only to reinforce the cultural importance of papal authority, even among the many billions of non-Catholics who don’t believe that by sitting on the throne of St. Peter, keeper of the keys of heaven, Francis is somehow magically invested with dogmatic infallibility.

We can debate the relevance of Person of the Year/Newsmaker of the Year distinctions. But to my mind, this sort of recognition should be awarded (if that’s even the right word) to people who capture the political and cultural mood. Pope Francis doesn’t do this. Neither do “the people of Alberta,” Canada.com’s newsmaker of the year.

There are two people who do represent what seemed, all told, like a pretty lousy year: Edward Snowden and Rob Ford.

D O U B LE I S S U E

12

DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

Pope Francis, the “people of Alberta” and other comparably encouraging figures are the choices of publications plying positivity in the face of its opposite, well-meaning but ultimately misguided attempts at seasonal sentiment.

Granted, naming Snowden Person of the Year would be controversial. But this was a year defined by controversy both at home and abroad. Quarterbacking the most substantial leak of intelligence in all of U.S. history, he’s a patriot to some, a traitor to others.

In the ongoing post-9/11 debate between national security and the sanctity of privacy, Snowden has shone a light on a gross tilt toward the former, making public the extent to which the American government has abused the trust invested in it by its citizenry.

More than this, the National Security Agency’s worst practices that he has divulged have come to typify the extent of global security overreach: in Israel, in Norway and even here in Canada.

Currently living under asylum in Russia, considered a fugitive from justice by his own nation (where fellow whistleblower Chelsea Manning was recently sentenced to 35 years in prison), Snowden is paying a very high personal price for his act.

Any lingering claim that his was some narcissistic stab at celebrity and self-persecution seems ludicrous, though maybe it’s some people’s natural reaction to someone who may be a real-deal hero.

From now on, any consideration of security, privacy, government transparency and the function and validity of democracy will have to be understood in the post-Snowden context.

Like Rob Ford, the only correct choice for Canadian Newsmaker/Person of the Year, Snowden has dragged us, sometimes kicking and screaming, into considering the reasonable limits of political authority.

Both have forced us to see that government has wrested control away from the electorate that’s supposed to vest it with its power, and have made us reckon with our own impotence in reclaiming that authority. (See Toronto city council’s structural inability to oust Ford from office.)

In 2014, Snowden and Ford both made us feel bad about our politicians, our governments and our taken-for-granted belief in democracy.

Maybe it’s no surprise that we’d want to take refuge in a compassionate, clown-nosed pope, a guy who manages to make us feel good despite everything.

3 D Ec E m B E r 2 3 , 2 0 1 3

time.com

johns@nowtoronto.com | @johnsemley3000

POLICING

WHEN COP SHOOTINGS GO VIRAL IN THE INTERNET AGE, MORE OF THE RESPONSIBILITY FOR POLICE OVERSIGHT MAY FALL TO THE CITIZENRY, THEIR SMARTPHONES AT THE READY

By ENZO DiMATTEO

S

eems like only yesterday we were talking about Sammy Yatim.

On Friday, December 13, at around 8 pm, another 18-year-old who seemed to be in mental distress was shot by police, this time on a subway car stopped at the Queen station.

What we know about the incident is that at least nine officers were on the scene. Four of them fired, reportedly up to 15 shots.

The victim, name unknown (reportedly because the family would like to keep it that way), was carrying a “weapon,” according to a spokesperson from the province’s Special Investigations Unit (SIU), the civilianled agency charged with investigating incidents involving police where there has been a death or serious injury.

The victim’s weapon, however, was described as a “toy gun” by others.

Several witnesses reported overhearing him tell police that he had nothing to live for. More than one described him as “calm” and “non-threatening.”

He’s now said to be in stable condition in hospital after early reports that he was suffering from life-threatening injuries.

According to the SIU, he sustained “several” gunshot wounds.

From official channels, the details about what happened are sketchy. Most of what we know has come from social media, people who were in the station at the time and took to Twitter to describe the incident.

Welcome to the internet age, when news travels faster than a speeding bullet and when, for police, public scrutiny is magnified.

The strict rules of engagement that govern the relationship between the police and the SIU mean that a tight lid is kept on investigations. How much that will change now that the unit has a new director – former Crown attorney Tony Loparco took over in mid-October – remains to be seen. Historically, change

On social media, news travels faster than a speeding bullet and police scrutiny’s magnified.

continued on page 15 œ

BEST OF THE SEASON NOW december 19-25 2013

13

talotta/getstock

CITY HALL

where karen stintz gets off She put a modern friendly face on the TTC, but under her three-​year tenure transit s­ ervice has actually gotten worse By ­BEN SPURR

When Karen Stintz steps down as TTC chair next February, it will be with a record that she hopes will help her win the mayoral election.

The Eglinton-​Lawrence councillor confirmed last week that after three years at the helm of the transit agency she is leaving the post early next year to focus on her mayoral run. Stintz’s time at the TTC has given her the highest profile of any council member whose last name isn’t Ford, and her supporters at City Hall say she’s done a lot to improve the commission during her term.

“I’ve been so pleased with Karen’s leadership that it’s hard to contemplate anybody else in the role,” says Councillor John Parker, who sits on the TTC board with

Stintz and is backing her run for mayor.

Parker credits Stintz with changing the culture of the TTC to emphasize customer service, and for being an early champion of the idea that government needs to invest in the transit system, even if it’s through new taxes.

She’s led the way in “getting the message across that the future of Toronto lies on a bigger and better TTC,” he says.

Asked what her legacy will be, Stintz lists a slew of initiatives intended to bring the TTC into the 21st century and rehabilitate the reputation of an agency that had become known for being stiflingly bureaucratic,

“We have a vision and a mission for the first time in 90 years.”

uncaring and outdated.

“We’ve worked hard to improve customer service, and there is a visible improvement in the system in terms of cleanliness and the way we communicate information,” she says in an interview in her office.

She points to new platform monitors that give real-​ time information about the next train’s arrival and open data apps that have been developed so people know when the next bus is arriving. Two subway stations were just outfitted with WiFi service, a first for Toronto, part of pilot project to expand connectivity across the subway system.

“We’ve got a customer charter. We have a vision and a mission for the first time in 90 years,” Stintz says.

But Stintz’s critics say that the efforts to put a modern, friendly face on the TTC mask the reality that ­service has actually gotten worse under her tenure.

Councillor Gord Perks describes Stintz’s term as “something of a disaster.”

“It doesn’t matter how many tweets the TTC sends out [about service delays] – people can’t get on the Dufferin bus, they can’t get on the Dundas streetcar,” he says.

Over the past three years, the TTC’s net budget has not increased, despite record growth in ridership.

When Stintz leaves next year, the subsidy the city gives to the agency will likely be around $428 million, slightly less than it was in 2010, the year before she took the job. Over the same period annual ridership has increased from 462 million to an estimated 540 million in 2014.

In fact, at points during her term the subsidy was reduced. In 2012 when Rob Ford sought to slash city spending across the board, Stintz, who was the mayor’s appointee, agreed to lower the subsidy to $410 million.

The subsidy stayed frozen at $410 million in 2013, even though more people than ever rode the system.

To make the smaller subsidy serve more riders than ever, in 2012 the commission increased crowding standards on some surface routes, packing more people onto less frequent buses and streetcars. The new standards were a reversal of a Miller-​era policy to

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reduce crowding, and remain in place.

As service declined and city funding was cut or ­frozen, passengers were asked to pay more. The commission approved a 10 cent fare hike in 2012, and inflationary 5 ​cent increases in each of the following two years.

The commission appears to have successfully advocated to bring the subsidy back to 2010 levels next year, but Perks argues that Stintz should have fought harder for more funding over her term.

“We’ve had chairs of the TTC come to council like lions before, fighting for every nickel they can because they understand transit riders are so packed in that we’re going to start putting them on the roof,” he says.

“Councillor Stintz has each year very meekly bowed to the will of the mayor and allowed service standards to decline.”

Transit expert Steve Munro believes the choices made on Stintz’s watch could stunt the system for years.

As one example he points to the commission’s decision in 2012 to defer the purchase of 134 new buses that were to be used to cope with ever-​growing ridership. If the TTC decides it wants to improve service standards any time soon it will be unable to, Munro says. It takes at least a year and a half to reorder those vehicles, and the bus storage facility that was supposed to house them was also cancelled.

And then of course there is the most controversial and expensive decision of Stintz’s tenure: the Scarborough subway. After backing a fully funded light rail plan in 2012 to replace the Scarborough RT, Stintz reversed course this year and supported the mayor’s three-​stop subway line instead. The $3.56-​billion extension of the Bloor-​Danforth line will cost the city at least $910 million, with the remainder being split by the provincial and federal governments.

“We’re prepared to spend a fortune building a subway in Scarborough that won’t open for 10 years, but meanwhile we have major problems with capacity of service all through the system that are a direct result of decisions that have been made over the last three years,” says Munro.

Stintz, however, defends her record. She predicts that customer experience will improve thanks to initiatives she worked on throughout her term, including the introduction next year of larger streetcars and buses, and the implementation of the PRESTO fare card. On the funding issue, she says that her hands were tied by Ford’s investment-averse administration, and that reducing service standards was preferable to cutting routes or steeper fare hikes.

“We tried to mitigate the impacts to the customer,” she says.

3 bens@nowtoronto.com | @benspurr

Who’s next as TTC chair?

Josh Colle Going for him Stintz’s backing, and by extension that of TTC CEO Andy Byford.

Going against him Does the first-term councillor have enough experience to manage the mega-corp?

At issue Burnishing rep for a possible mayoral run sometime in the future.

Maria Augimeri Going for her Ties to the TTC bureaucracy going back to the reign of former general manager Gary Webster.

Going against her Opposes Scarborough subway extension that council supported earlier this year.

At issue Has no plans to continue in the job if she’s reelected to council next term.

When cop shootings go viral œcontinued from page 12

at the top at the SIU hasn’t resulted in a measur­able increase in police accountability. Thus, more of the responsibility for police oversight may fall to the citi­zen­r y, their smartphones at the ready.

July’s Yatim shooting, caught on a nearby security camera and the cellphones of passersby, caused public outrage, protests in the streets and calls for better police training. Sec­ond-degree murder charges were even­tually laid against Constable James Forcillo.

If there’d been no videos or viral accounts by witnesses on the scene, would those charges have been laid?

On Sunday, December 15, some 60 protesters from Disarm Toronto Police took to the streets in an “emergency rally” to demand the disarming of frontline officers.

The group burned a pig in effigy outside the Queen subway station (I’m told that part wasn’t planned), but if they want to bolster their case, the best evidence is the statistics. Eight people have been shot to death by police since 2011.

The fact that four officers fired in Friday’s incident suggests they

made little effort to de-escalate the situation, and that supposition isn’t a stretch. The police track record when dealing with the mentally ill is bad and seems to be getting worse.

At the Ontario Coroner’s Complex at Keele and Wilson, an inquest into the deaths of Reyal JardineDouglas in 2010, Sylvia Klibingaitis in 2011 and Michael Eligon in 2012 has been going on since October.

All three were killed by police. All three were suffering from mental illness at the time.

Video of the Eligon shooting, released only last month, was captured by the dashboard camera of a police cruiser called to the scene.

The officer who shot Eligon, Constable Scott Walker, seems to have put himself in a compromising posi­tion – backed up against a van parked on the street, with seemingly no ave­nue of retreat.

At the crucial moment, eight police officers are lined up in front of Eligon as he’s walking toward them with a pair of scissors in each hand.

Four have their guns drawn. Police have said they had no option but to shoot.

It’s their standard refrain. We may hear it again apropos of Friday’s shooting. But this time the victim is alive and might have something to say. And so might the witnesses who reportedly caught this near-tragedy on video.

3 enzom@nowtoronto.com | @enzodimatteo

Compiled by NOW staff

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Rob Ford steals Christmas

Rob Ford’s family Christmas party wasn’t even hitting its stride Wednesday night, December 11, when the criticism from City Hall watchers, and a few journalists, started lighting up ­social media.

About a dozen media reps accepted the invite, despite calls for a boycott by some journalists, on the condition that they not bring any cameras or recording devices inside. Were the media co-opted? Here’s what five who were involved had to say on the ethical dilemma.

THE FORD FAMILY CHRISTMAS PARTY WAS AN INSIGHT INTO HOW THE clan CARRies ON and MANAGEs TO LIVE DAY-TO-DAY WITH THE DARKNESS SUPPRESSED OR IGNORED

By JONATHAN GOLDSBIE

I

wanted to run to the washroom and vomit, but didn’t like the idea of the mayor’s mother having to clean up after me.

On Wednesday, December 11, I was a journalist covering the Ford family Christmas and in effect a guest at the Ford family home. I was also a person trying (and possibly failing) to reconcile those things with each other and with my conscience.

“What the fuck,” I thought, “am I doing here?”

Sitting on a couch in the rec room of Diane Ford’s house, my gaze shifted between the large-​screen TV and the opposite set of couches, where Mayor Rob Ford and Councillor Frank Di Giorgio sat watching the hockey game. I know nothing about hockey, but I know a lot about the mayor.

In an interview broadcast two days earlier, he had baselessly suggested that one of my press gallery colleagues, the Star’s Daniel Dale, may be a pedophile. The following day, he not only refused to apologize but insisted he stood by his remarks.

And here I had him, cornered, in the basement of the house in which he grew up – the rarest of beasts, to whom access is typically fleeting – right there, relaxing, doing his thing.

I’d been getting a steady stream of criticism via Twitter (including from people I respect) for having gone in the first place. I recalled the Vice guys hanging out with Kim Jong-​un and had to remind myself that it wasn’t their gonzo reporting that was repulsive, but that they’d let themselves lose perspective.

I concluded that the only way I could leave with my dignity intact would be to get myself kicked out. Shit. * * * The Ford family compound is off Royal York Road

16

december 19-25 2013 NOW

near the park named after the late Doug Ford Sr., who’s buried close by. He and wife Diane raised their kids at the house, and she and son Randy still live here.

From the street it looks like a two-​storey bungalow, from the rear like a mansion.

Inside, the house is like a poorly curated museum with artifacts and art from various regions and eras butting up against each other: rugs, vases… hieroglyphics? It’s not always clear which pieces are genuine and which are reproductions. The mayor says many of the items came from his father’s time in Asia.

There’s so much to look at and examine. Given the perpetual scramble for clues to the Ford mythology, it’s an unusually stimulating abode. You can get lost imagining the significance of anything.

A spiral staircase leads down to the basement, where the first thing you encounter is a photograph of the staircase itself. The wood-panelled rec room with a bar is decorated as a shrine to the departed patriarch, walls lined with photographs of the senior Ford, news articles about him, letters from politicians. We see what he looked like when he played high school football. (Unsurprisingly, like his sons.) One wall hosts a framed collection of materials concerning his death, including the Toronto Star obituary, the program for his memorial service and a photograph of his shaken-​looking adult children carrying his casket. Other walls have paintings of warplanes.

No one can agree on the animal from which a large skin rug originates.

Diane says the person who sold it to her had told her it was bear. Doug says, no, it’s probably deer or maybe cow.

When I arrive just before 7 pm, Gary Crawford is the only councillor there. It’s not his first time in that basement, but he looks as unsure about his own presence as I do. * * * If civic engagement in the Ford era is driven by a fear of missing out, then its journalism is driven by a fear of blinking at the wrong moment.

Making the decision to attend the Ford family Christmas involved weighing whether I would hate myself more if I went or if I didn’t.

To me, it was equally plausible that the lastminute media invite could have been either just something Doug blurted out and the brothers decided to follow through on or a calculated and cynical attempt to repair relations following the awfulness toward Daniel Dale.

Entering their turf on their terms, with no cameras or recording devices allowed, would inherently place me at a disadvantage and make any actual reporting extremely awkward. Maybe that was the point. I kept thinking of Jeff Daniels’s final scene in Speed.

Eventually, I decided it was my journalistic recontinued on page 21 œ

“Agreeing to go to their family Christmas party and watch everyone sing Happy Birthday to the guy’s wife... it’s not the right moment for that. This has gone to a way dark place. It just feels wrong.”

Robyn Doolittle, Toronto Star City Hall reporter

“It makes me very nervous when poli­ticians say what journalists can and can’t do.”

Jeffrey Dvorkin, director of the journalism program at the University of Toronto Scarborough

“It is right to keep some degree of distance and impartiality from those you cover. It’s also right to get as close as you can to tell as close to a complete truth as you possibly can. The arguments are so compelling either way.”

Lisa Taylor, associate professor of journalism at Ryerson University

“We sent a reporter because with this mayor there is always the potential for him to say or do something newsworthy.”

Ron Wadden, Toronto editor for the National Post

“The allegations of improper conduct by Mr. Ford and some of his associates are a matter of vital public interest, and this was a clear opportunity to ­observe the mayor.”

Sinclair Stewart, news editor, Globe and Mail

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calorie count 1,123,500

hunger

Number of visits to GTA food banks in 2012, an 18 per cent increase over pre-​recession 2008 figures.

70%

Amount of income the average food bank client spends on housing.

32%

Food bank users who are children. Also, the percentage of adults who have given up food to pay rent.

50%

Households using food banks that are on social assistance.

michael watier

28%

Food bank users who graduated university, a 3 per cent increase over 2007.

my food bank diet challenge

68%

Food bank users whose main source of income is Ontario Works or Ontario Disability Support Program.

I felt about as good as I did after “being vegan” for a minute, and definitely hated myself By DAN MOSSIP-BALKWILL

I do not do moderation

or food planning well. I knew this when my friend Erin and I had the spontaneous idea of becoming vegan for a week.

Then I took on a brand new food challenge. I’m part of Put Food in the Budget (putfoodinthebudget.ca), a group working to get social assis­tance rates increased. Earlier this month we attempted to live on a food bank diet for five days to highlight how difficult and unhealthy it is.

I subscribe to the Louis C.K. school of thought when it comes to food, which is that the meal isn’t over when you’re full; it’s over when you hate yourself. So in a fit of food terror I reverted to high school breakup mode and downed a chocolate bar and a block of cheese to get my fix before em-

barking on my challenge. I felt about as good as I did after “being vegan” for a minute, and definitely hated my­self.

I woke up hungry the first morning of my challenge but ignored my stomach and had water and tea, not wanting to eat too early, then two pieces of toast and a yogurt. I was hungry as soon as I finished, and count­ed the hours to lunch: a burrito with refried beans and salsa. And then again to dinner, which was rice and tuna.

I was eating to try to satisfy my hunger, not because I was looking for­ward to my meals. I was overwhelmed by the plainness of everything. The salsa was the most exciting part of the day. Everything was dry, and I didn’t feel full all day.

And knowing that I was going to eat rice and tuna at least four more times that week wasn’t the

Excerpts from Alex Meers’s diary

“Today I flipped out on a can of tuna”

Day 1

Had to attend a work lunch and just have tea while my co-workers had a delicious lunch. Starting to realize that this is going to be a mental battle against my hunger. I must have thought about food 20-plus times ­today.

18

december 19-25 2013 NOW

Day 2

Something is up with my stomach. I’m feeling bloated but also really hungry all the time. Other symptoms: headache, tired, a little moody, unmotivated, antisocial. Getting nervous about the next three days.

Day 3

Hangry (adjective): a combination of hungry and angry. People may seem uncharacteristically grumpy because they haven’t eaten.

I’m feeling HANGRY today for a few reasons: I’m hungry. Always.

I’m angry that I don’t look forward to eating any more because food in a can sucks.

I’m sick of eating rice. I offi­ cially hate rice – bold statement from a guy who grew up on it! I’m angry that I have no choice. I’m angry that people are forced to live like this every day.

Day 4

Today I flipped out on a can.

Yep. I was trying to open a

1989 kind of thing I was used to.

Nor were the sense of limits and lack of control I felt. Not feeling like I had a say in what I put in my body was very frustrating.

I began to feel isolated. I stayed inside all day, just hovering around my food, making sure it didn’t vanish. I didn’t want to go out with friends despite their repeated attempts to get me out.

(That’s my first hungry lie; no one did that.) And I didn’t have a ton of energy; I imagined that would only get worse.

But I legit didn’t want to go out with people where I’d have to turn down food. Premier Kathleen Wynne has the power to take the first step in addressing this with an immediate increase of $100 per month in social assistance so that people can thrive not just survive.

can of tuna that just didn’t want to open (at the sink in my office). After the fifth attempt, I yelled out a very bad word... really loud. It was highly unprofessional and offensive to the tuna.

Unfortunately, some coworkers had to see that.

Sorry. Hunger can bring out a different side of you.

Day 5

I’m glad this is over but inspired to do more. Here’s what I learned about hunger: • Hunger hurts... emotionally and ­physically.

• Hunger takes away choice.

You eat what you can get and only socialize when it doesn’t involve spending money.

• Hunger is a systemic issue.

We need to address larger economic challenges (living costs, food costs, lack of jobs, housing and insufficient social assis­t ance) that prevent people from having enough money for food.

•I have gained respect for every person who works in a food bank, and I think donating to food banks is incredibly important to meet the immediate need. However, I did not do this challenge to encourage people to donate to food banks. I did it to help move people from spectators reading this to active allies. Together we can influence the decision-makers who have the power to raise social assistance, which is the real problem.

Parliament of Canada passes unanimous motion to end child poverty by the year 2000.

47,000

Number of children and their families lifted out of poverty in Ontario since 2008, according to numbers released by the Liberal government this week.

Source: Daily Bread Food Bank’s Who’s Hungry 2012: Faces Of Hunger report; Ontario’s Poverty Reduction Strategy 2013 annual report.

The food bank diet (per person)

4 containers of precooked multi-grain rice 3 potatoes 2 bags of powdered milk 2 yogurts 2 carrots 1 onion 1 can of baked beans 1 can of Chef Boyardee 1 can of macaroni and beef 1 can of chickpeas 1 can of tomatoes 1 jar of peanut butter 1 package of 10 chicken hot dogs 1 package of pasta 1 small loaf of bread The challenge Make it last five days. And then write your MP and the premier about your experience.

NOW december 19-25 2013

19

First person

No christian conversion I could almost hear my Marxist Jewish grandfather’s ghostly whisper: “Hey, mashugana, what the fuck are you doing?” By JACOB SCHEIER

LCBO #413179

for in the end there was a compromise: after Jesus was born, the other Jewish boy and I took off our respective camel and donkey hoods and lit a menorah in the centre of the stage.

Although, looking back, I think my mother was absolutely right, I hated her at the time for making me feel different.

The reason we had a Christmas tree in the first place is both silly and not so silly. My grandfather was a communist in Yonkers, New York, in the McCarthyite years. He was, as you might expect, a deeply paranoid man who wanted to blend in as much as possible. He felt celebrating Christmas would make his family appear more American.

Everyone knew, I guess, that communists might celebrate Hanukkah but would never celebrate Christmas. And so this way of recognizing both Christmas and Hanukkah became nor­mal for my mother. We celebrated both holidays, in our own way, as far back as I can remember.

It became a time of year I looked forward to.

What I enjoyed most about Christmas Day was walking through the nearly deserted streets of Toronto and feeling how on this one day the city, emptied of people, seemed to belong to us Christmas-Hanukkah-celebrating, non-practising, communist Jews.

At some point, Christmas had become less about my wanting to blend in and more about celebrating just how odd we were.

Shortly before Christmas 2000, my mother died. She had been diagnosed with breast cancer less

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When I was growing up, we had a Christmas tree and a menorah at home. I was an only child raised by a single mother.

On each of the eight nights of Hanukkah we would say the traditional prayer and light the candles, and my mother would give me one small pre­sent: chocolate, socks, a book. On Christ­mas Day, we would eat lox and cream cheese on bagels with a side of bacon (we were far from kosher), and then go to a movie and later get Chinese food. I thought this was normal. This, I believed as a child, was what all families did on Christmas.

It wasn’t until my Grade 5 Christmas pageant that I came to understand that my family wasn’t like the other families in our neighbourhood and that I wasn’t like the other kids at school.

I grew up near Harbourfront before all the condo development, and before it was an artist residence I went to the Toronto Island School, which then had a Jewish population of two, including myself.

The other Jewish boy and I had no speaking parts in the pageant. Instead, I was the hump of a camel, and the other Jewish boy might have been the rear of a donkey. I don’t know how much this casting had to do with my mother’s fury, but she decided, though we ate bacon by the glow of a Christmas tree every year, that dramatizing the birth of Christ was culturally marginalizing to non-Christian students.

The school didn’t understand what all the fuss was about. When an ad­min­istrator told my mother that “Christmas was for everyone,” she shot back, “No, Christ-mass is for Christ-ians.”

She may have threatened to get lawyers involved,

than a year before. As December 25 approached, I began to feel anxious about how I’d spend that day.

I spent the next few years kind of Christmas-surfing, going to a girlfriend’s family home with her till we broke up a year later, and then, in recent years, to the home of a childhood friend and his family.

The way they do Christmas isn’t religious but is significantly more tra­ditional than anything my mother and I did. My friend’s family goes to one of those farms where you cut down your own tree. They do stockings and a turkey dinner. The presents are piled up under the tree, and the late morning and early afternoon are a marathon gift exchange. Although every Christmas stirs in me a heightened sense of my orphanhood, I’ve always felt grateful to be so warm­ly accepted.

But I don’t think I can go this year. Last year, I ran around for days before Christmas trying to find an appropriate gift for each member of the family. As I found myself dashing through the Eaton Centre, unease hit me like a lightning bolt, like St. Paul’s conversion on the road to Damascus, but in reverse.

I could nearly hear my mother’s voice – “Christmass is for Christ-ians” – and I could almost hear my grandfather, too, speaking from the one set of beliefs we really did have in my family, saying something in a ghostly whisper about the workers, the means of production, the la­bour theory of value. I think his exact words would have been “Hey, mashugana, what the fuck are you doing?”

What was I doing? How did I get here?

So I think the jig is up. It dawned on me that I was also running away from myself, from who I am – an orphan who grew up kind of Jewish, sort of Marxist and little bit Christian for the sake of assimilation, who now has no idea what to believe or what to do with myself at this time of year. But I know I like moo shu pork. I know I like going to movies and feel­ing how quiet the city is on Christ­mas Day. So perhaps that’s a place to begin – again.

3 news@nowtoronto

Well it’s that time of year again, the Holiday Season is upon us.

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When thinking about entertaining or when gift giving

Why not think Zenato?

one taste and you Will understand Why any other choice is a compromise.

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Available at select LCBO stores.

These finds are worth the search.

20

december 19-25 2013 NOW

BAD SANTA

œcontinued from page 16

sponsibility to put myself in uncomfortable situations. This would be a unique and bizarre trip to Ford Nation, and I couldn’t pass on the opportunity. * * * “Make yourselves at home.” This was the Fords’ mantra, repeated to me and others throughout the evening.

Having been to several of their eponymous fests, I expected the Fords to be excellent hosts, and they were. Food catered by Panino Cappuccino was served as a buffet: salad, potato wedges, penne alla vodka, vegetables and veal cutlets. I tried a little; it was okay. The bar was open, plus a keg of Steam Whistle. I did not see the mayor drink. (I had water.)

There’s no necessary correlation between a person’s decency and his or her ability to demonstrate hospitality. And to a degree, we reporterguests were compelled to reciprocate.

Any mutual loathing had to simmer beneath a surface of pleasantness that no one wanted to be first to puncture. At least not while there were still things to be learned from playing along.

When the mayor – having granted a request to lead the media on a tour of the house – took us over a bridge on the icy backyard deck as O Come, All Ye Faithful blared from outdoor speakers, I was profoundly grateful for the beautiful and mind-bending weirdness of it all. In that moment, I regretted nothing. Ford’s breath visible, he swept his arm across the property, telling us how the Tragically Hip played there when they were starting out and how Raine Maida grew up just over thataway, beyond the fence.

Many of his former employees who’d recently transferred to the deputy mayor’s office showed up, including Earl Provost, his fourth of five chiefs of staff. (None of those who’d explicitly resigned or been fired were there.)

Lobbyist and former councillor Chris Korwin-Kuczynski milled around with his wife, as did past (and likely future) Ward 3 candidate and sometime realtor Ross Vaughan. He’s the guy who acted for the mayor back when Ford was trying to buy a piece of parkland next to his house. Dale was investigating that story when the mayor made false claims about the reporter lurking in his backyard taking pictures of his kid.

There were other friends of the family, but none I recognized from court documents.

Sweeping in, through and around it all were the undercurrents of everything else that was happening, the knowledge of everything the mayor gets up to.

“I know things about you,” I thought. “You know I know things

about you. This is horrible.”

The distance between the intuited and the experienced was vertiginous. Like climbing a mountain and sometimes looking down to discover how divorced you’ve become from the earth.

The party was an insight into how the Fords carry on – how they manage to live on a day-to-day basis, with the darkness suppressed or ignored.

There was a group Christmas carol singalong, and a singing of Happy Birthday to Rob’s wife, Renata; three cakes were iced with her name.

Emergency services show up to

Rob and Renata’s home with alarming regularity. As recently as August, police responded to a “domestic assault” call.

And here was a basement of people, hosted by the Fords, singing her Happy Birthday. For he’s a jolly good fellow. * * * I panicked. Did having tweeted about Parmesan and red pepper flakes serve to obscure the fact that this was about things other than Parmesan and red pepper flakes? Slander, abuse, addiction, blackmail and all the other allegations encircle this

man everywhere but here.

I felt nauseous and gross and sad and scared.

Just the previous day, I watched the mayor use the attention around the “pedophile” scandal to draw media to an announcement about cutting the land transfer tax. When I returned to my office afterward, the stress, repugnance and fatigue finally got to me and I cracked; I banged my head against the wall of the washroom and cried. And now, today, I was sitting next to this man, watching him watch hockey on TV. He enjoyed it.

By 9:44, there was nothing left to

gain by being there, and potentially much to lose.

The mayor went up to the front hallway. Another reporter and I approached him. We asked about his Daniel Dale statements, and as soon as he heard the name, he said, “I’m gonna have to let you go.”

We persisted.

I told him it’d moved me to tears the previous day and asked if he got why that might be. I figured the honesty would be cathartic.

He talked right over it all. “Take care. Thank you very much.”

3 jonathang@nowtoronto.com | @goldsbie

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NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

21

daily events meetings • benefits

listings index

Live music Theatre Dance

48 59 60

Comedy Art galleries Readings

61 62 62

Movie reviews Movie times Rep cinemas

76 81 83

festivals • expos • sports etc.

How to find a listing

Daily events appear by date, then alphabetically by the name of the event.

F indicates festive events N indicates New Year events r indicates kid-friendly events

How to place a listing

All listings are free. Send to: listings@nowtoronto.com, fax to 416-​364-​1166 or mail to Daily Events, NOW Magazine, 189 Church, Toronto M5B 1Y7.

Include a brief description of the event, including participants, time, price, venue, address and contact phone number (or e-mail or website if no phone available). Listings may be edited for length. Deadline is the Thursday before publication at 5 pm.

Thursday, December 19

Benefits

FHo Ho T.O. (Daily Bread Food Bank) Holiday party. 7 pm. $40-$150. Virgin Mobile Mod Club, 722 College. facebook. com/­hohoto.

Lights Out! (LightSeed Energy) Interactive night of music, drinks, food and art. $10. Courthouse, 57 Adelaide E. 416214-9379, ­lightseedenergy.com.

Events

FrAllan Gardens Christmas Flower Show Open to the public daily 10 am-5 pm to Jan 12. Free. Allan Gardens Conservatory, Sherbourne and Gerrard. 416-392-7288.

Creative Knitting And Fibre Arts Workshop with knitter/spinner Cathy Thomson. 5-7 pm. Free. S Walter Stewart Library, 170 Memorial Park. Pre-register 416-396-3975.

FCut, Cut, Paste Holiday craft show with screen-printed tea towels, bow ties, T-shirts, jewellery and more. 6-10:30 pm. Free. Beaver Café, 1192 Queen W. 416-537-2768.

FNerd Nite Toronto Holiday Nerdtacular Presentations on mixology and magic, comedy with Craig Fay, trivia and more. 8 pm. $5. Tranzac, 292 Brunswick. toronto.nerdnite.com.

Toronto WordSmiths Writing group for youth 16 to 29.

5:30-7:30 pm. Free. Parkdale Library, 1303 Queen W. facebook.com/towordsmiths.

FWandering Winter Craft Show Crafts and gifts. To Dec 22 noon-6 pm. Free. Scadding Court Community Centre Market, 707 Dundas W. shopcats.ca. rWinter Scavenger Hunt Family scavenger hunt.

Through Dec 22 at various times. Free. Harbourfront Centre, 235 Queens Quay W. 416-973-4000, harbourfrontcentre.com.

Friday, December 20

Benefits

Rocking The Foundation (Heart and Stroke Fdn) Concert featuring AFFINITY, Jason Dodge, the Dreadful Starlings and others. 8 pm. $12, adv $10. Hard Rock Cafe, 279 Yonge. a ­ ryaconcertsandevents.ticketleap.com.

Events

Festivals this week

Winterfest On Toronto’s Waterfront Dog-sledding demos, family

Cheol Joon Baek

skating, gingerbread cookie-decorating, a Santa Cruise ($14-$17), pet photos with Santa and more. Free. Venues on Queens Quay W. ­waterfrontbia.com.

Dec 21 and 22

Skate the night away ​ at Winterfest.

FrCarollers Strolling carollers dressed in Edwardian

costume entertain. To Dec 22, 10 am-3 pm. Free w/ admission. Casa Loma, 1 Austin Terrace. 416-923-1171, casaloma.org.

FrChristmas At Kortright Horse-drawn wagon rides, Santa’s workshop, treats and more. Today and tomorrow.

Free w/ admission. Kortright Centre, Pine Valley and Major Mackenzie (Kleinburg). 905-832-2289.

FrDesign And Decorate A Magical Gingerbread House Families work with pastry chefs to decorate a

gingerbread house. To Dec 23, 10:30 & 11:30 am, noon, 1, 1:30 & 2:30 pm. Free w/ admissions. Casa Loma, 1 Austin Terrace. 416-923-1171, casaloma.org.

FrA Night In Bethlehem Roman guards, census takers, shepherds, angels, Mary and Joseph, live stable animals continued on page 24 œ

22

december 19-25 2013 NOW

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23

events œcontinued from page 22

and a marketplace. 7-9 pm. Free (donations accepted). Richview Baptist Church, 1548 Kipling. ­richview.org. rPolymer Party PA day camp investigating the properties of polymers for kids five to 12.

9 am-4 pm. $65. Ontario Science Centre, 770 Don Mills. Pre-register 416-696-1000.

FSmall Is Beautiful Arts and crafts show and sale. Noon-8:30 pm. Free. CSI Annex, 720 Bathurst. smallisbeautfulartsandcrafts.­ eventbrite.ca.

Stories From Rumi Ariel Balevi presents stories by the 13th-century Sufi mystical poet.

7:30 pm. Free. La Boheme Cafe, 2481 Yonge. ­labohemecafe.ca.

cebook.com/resistancepress.

FRouge Park Holiday Guided Walks Win-

ter wonderland guided walks in Rouge Park.

Today and tomorrow. See website for details. rougepark.com/hike.

FSanta’s Choice Zine Fair Zines, comics, small press, prints, T-shirts, jewellery, crafts and more plus music by Interface DJs. Noon-6 pm. Free. XPACE Cutural Centre, 303 Lansdowne. xpace.info.

FSolid Colour Holiday Show Gift-sized paintings, mince pie and artist demos. Today 8 am-5 pm; tomorrow 11 am-5 pm. Free. Artscape Wychwood Barns, 601 Christie. info@ solidcolour.ca.

Toronto Salsa Practice No lesson, beginners to pros, no partner required. 3:30 & 5:30 pm. $5. Trinity-St Paul’s Centre, 427 Bloor W. torontosalsapractice.com.

Denise Williams, Marcus Nance and others plus a bake and craft sale. 4 pm. $25, stu/srs $20, child $12. St Matthews Cathedral, 875 Queen E. 416-465-2880.

Events FrThe Good Times Xmas Show Kids’ show.

3 pm. Pwyc. Drake Hotel, 1150 Queen W. 416531-5042.

FrHoliday Sweets Tour Walk through Kensington Market to sample chocolates, candy canes and other festive treats. 11:30 am. $30, kids $10. 321 Spadina. ­tastytourstoronto.com.

Introduction To Buddhism Course on the theory and practice of Buddhism. 2 pm. $5 sugg. KSDL Tibetan Buddhist Temple, 7 Laxton. 416-653-5471.

Japanese Tea Ceremony Experience the ritual

375 Jane. 416-925-7575.

FrHoliday Camps Day camps for kids five to 12 include Frosty Fun and Winter Magic. 9 am-4 pm. $33/day. Scarborough Historical Museum, 1007 Brimley. Pre-register 416-3388807.

See Kensington’s colourful Winter Solstice Festival December 21.

FrSecrets From The North Pole Magic Workshop Kids six and up learn magic tricks

from Professor Bumbling Bert. 2 pm. Free.

Maryvale Library, 85 Ellesmere. 416-396-8931.

Tuesday, December 24

Events

rLearn To Skate Outdoor skating classes for all ages run through Mar 2014. Various times and prices. Harbourfront Centre Rink, 235 Queens Quay W. Pre-register 416-973-4093, harbourfrontcentre.com/learntoskate.

Toronto’s Esplanade – Access: Safety For Pedestrians Walk Urban ecology walk. 6:30 pm. Free. Bay and Front. 416-593-2656.

Saturday, December 21

Benefits

Benefit Concert (Red Door Shelter) Perform-

ances by Tyson Froese, the Joy Arson, Savanah and Here Below. 8 pm. $10. Rivoli, 332 Queen W. 416-596-1908, rivoli.ca.

Rule The Night (Camp Oochigeas) Join other fearless runners on the darkest night of the year. Registration 8:15 pm, run 9 pm. Free, sponsor will donate $10 for every participant.

Tower Automotive Building, 158 Sterling. ­werunthenight.ca.

We Rise (Typhoon Haiyan relief) Music by the Plaitwrights, the Charleston Relay, the Airplane Boys, John River and C2 Genesys. Doors 7 pm. $20. Drake Hotel, 1150 Queen W. ­thedrakehotel.ca.

big3 NOW editors pick a trio of this week’s can’t-miss events

Events

made gifts. Today and tomorrow noon-6 pm.

Free. Tranzac, 292 Brunswick. artisansgiftfair. com. rBallet 101 Kids six to 12 learn about ballet as a storytelling medium with Ballet Jörgen. 2 pm. Free. Albion Library, 1515 Albion. 416394-5170.

FrChristmas Cookie Creation Kids eight to 12 make holiday treats and listen to Victorian Christmas stories. Today and tomorrow 9:30-11:30 am. $22.50. Colborne Lodge, High Park. 416-392-6916. rDecorate A Tree For The Birds Help decorate an evergreen tree in High Park. 1 pm. $8.

Howard Park Tennis Club, 430 Parkside. ­highparknaturecentre.com.

FFestival Of Smalls Sale of original artworks in gift sizes. To Dec 24. Free (art $55$250). Art Interiors, 446 Spadina Rd. ­artinteriors.ca.

FrHands-On Activities For Families Make holiday tree decorations, wreaths, centrepieces and more. Today and tomorrow 11 am-3 pm. Free. Harbourfront Centre, 235 Queens Quay W. 416-973-4000, ­harbourfrontcentre.com.

FI Love T.O. Holiday Skating Party Outdoor skating to music by DJ DLUX and DJ Lissa Monet. 8 pm. Free. Harbourfront Centre Rink, 235 Queens Quay W. 416-973-4000, ­harbourfrontcentre.com.

Must be legal drinking age. Watch your tail. Drink responsibly.

FArtisans’ Gift Fair One-of-a-kind hand-

Your week has 7 days.

Someday isn’t one of them. [ taste life ]

Jewish Contemplative Chanting Service

/ yellowtail

4:30-6 pm. Free. Miles Nadal JCC, 750 Spa­dina. ­shirlibeynu.ca.

FKengsington Market Winter Solstice A lantern-lit procession through the market with performances by Sha­dowland Theatre, Samba Squad, Richard Underhill and others. 7 pm. Free. Oxford and Augusta. ­redpepperspectacle.wordpress.com.

Walk through the market to see the diverse festivals of light and sample foods. 9:30 am-1 pm. $50, stu/srs $45, child $35. Red pole with black cat at 350 Spadina. Pre-register 416-9236813.

FKosa Kolektiv Winter Folk Bazaar Handway of preparing and drinking tea as influFVQ Holiday Market Handmade, vintage, made and vintage folk art, crafts, edibles, enced by Zen Buddhism. 2 pm. $8. Tao Sangha food and Date: more.October 10 am-72013 pm. Free. Vendor Studio Docket: 31014291-P #: yel_4291_13_camp1_007 Colour: 4 colour jewellery, books and more. 11 am-5 pm. Free.

Toronto HealingAd Centre, 375 Jane. Pre-register Queens, 1093 Queen W. vendorqueens.com.

St Vladimir Institute, 620 Spadina.

416-925-7575. rWinterInternal Folk Craft WorkshopsAgency Decora-Docket: 31014291 Revisions: Job Description: Print Ad Publication: Now Magazine ­kosakolektiv.com. rSamba Drumming For Kids Drop-in worktive wheat sheaf and straw mobile workshops FrChristmas Treats Trek Visit the animals Love Lessons and Courage Class Weekly ages. 11 am-noon. $10.

Client Revisions: Mechanical Size: 5.83”x7.44” and demos for all ages. Noon. $10 &Client: $35. StYellowtailshop for kids of all Mechanical Approval and watch them get their holiday treats. 9:30 gathering for people to inspire each other to Drum Artz Community Centre, 27 Primrose.

Vladimir Institute, 620 Spadina. Pre-register am-3:30 pm. Half off regular admission. Tobelieve in love and gain the courage to be drumartz.com. kosakolektiv.com. ronto Zoo, Meadowvale N of 401. 416-392more honest with family and friends. 5-7 pm.

5929. $20. Spiritwind Centre, 64 Oxford. f­ acebook. com/events/184642795060266.

FrROM ForSignature/Date: The Holidays Holiday-themed Art Director Signature/Date Copy Writer Signature/Date Account Service FResistance Bookroom Holiday Sale Sofamily activities include games and toys. To Chanting Join in chanting for peace, Jan 5, Thu to Sun. 11 am-4 pm. Free w/ admiscialist, anti-oppression and environmental Amahl And The Night Visitors (Toronto happiness and spiritual growth. 7 pm. sion. Royal Ontario Museum, 100 Queen’s literature. Today and tomorrow noon-6 pm.

Onyx Lions Club/Opera By Request) Concert Free.

Tao Sangha Toronto Healing Centre, Park. 416-586-8000.

Free. Trinity-St Paul’s Centre, 427 Bloor W. fa3 performance of the one-act opera featuring

upcoming

Thursday, December 26

Sunday, December 22

Benefits

december 19-25 2013 NOW

At this is the time of year, shelter should be top of mind. Help women seeking refuge from ­ab­use at a fundraising concert for Red Door Shelter at the Rivoli (332 Queen West) on Saturday (December 21), 8 pm. Music courtesy of the Joy Arson, Tyson Froese, ­Savanah, Ready the Prince and Here Below. $10. 416-596-1908, rivoli.ca.

WELCOME TO THE LIGHT

Colour, pageantry and lights – there’s no better community expression of these than Kensington Market’s Winter Solstice festivi­ ties. The lantern-lit procession weaves through the dark Market streets with giant puppets, stilt walkers and drummers in tow, stopping at various points for music and theatre performances.

Bundle up, grab a noisemaker and welcome the year’s longest night in fine pagan style. Saturday (­December 21), 7 pm. Free. ­Oxford and Augusta. ­redpeperspectacle. wordpress.com.

SEE THE SNOW-CLAD ROUGE

FKensington Festive Foodies Roots Walk

24

GIVE THEM SHELTER

Monday, December 23

Events

Rouge Park, T.O.’s largest urban green space, saved from urban sprawl by grassroots action years back and still requiring protection, is a magnificent place to wander in wintertime. The river system, once part of a First Nations portage route, runs through varied terrain – deep forest, orchards, open meadows and clifftops with breathtaking views. See the park blanketed in white on one of seven guided treks Saturday and ­Sunday (December 21 and 22).

Free. Check ­rougepark.com/hike for times.

NOW’s Holiday

There’s only one weekend left to find the perfect present for everyone on your list, but don’t panic! We make it easy with a final guide full of fantastic finds for budgets and tastes high and low, including a page of gifts with a charitable twist.

The clock’s ticking, so get shopping!

By SABRINA MADDEAUX and ALEXANDER JOO Photos DAVID HAWE Makeup & hair: TAYLOR SAVAGE SAVAGE/judyinc.com using TRESemmé Keratin Smooth Heat Protection Spray Models: FRANCINA F and MYLES S / B&M Models If you think your cat likes Christmas tree ornaments, wait till he sees these dangling beauties. Mizdragonfly aqua and yellow tassel earrings ($55, Made You Look, 1338 Queen West, 416-463-2136, madeyoulook.ca).

Stand out in the snow and slush with this colourful knit stripe Infinity scarf ($40, Body Blue, 199 Danforth, 416-778-7601, and other, bodyblue.ca).

With cute little squeaking noises and a cozy red scarf, this isn’t the world’s most accurate depiction of a rhino, but it’ll make Fido happy. FouFou Dog holiday corduroy rhino toy ($10, Timmie Doggie Outfitters, 867 Queen West, 416-203-6789, and other, timmie.ca).

Sound gift. $99

Mies e200 The best earbuds under $300

1020 Queen St. W. • 263 Queen St. E.

$369

$329 PSB powered speakers

Denon Turntable

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25

Dine ine in Little Italy over the Holidays

Holiday GIFT GUIDE

R… O F Y U B O WHAT T

Visit our fabulous retailers & restaurants on College St between Bathurst & Shaw

H OGTOWN PUB OYSTERS

THE

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AND

Mon-Thur All You Can Eat Reg. $19.99 NOW $17.99 Fri-Sun All You Can Eat Reg. $21.99 NOW $19.99

A great place to meet friends and family!

Gourmet pub fare with great craft beer and excellent service.

671 College St 416-536-8328 sushi-d.just-eat.ca

633 College St. 416-645-0285 thehogtownpub.com

THE RADICAL T SLACKTIVIS

All profits from this Natasha Koifman for !Xam Diamonds sterling silver chain set benefit Artists for Peace and Justice, Justice which supports communities in Haiti with education, health care and more ($350, NKPR, nkpr.net).

Trattoria

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Half the profits of each (Belvedere) RED bottle go toward the Bonofounded (RED) Global Fund, which fights to end perinatal HIV infection by 2015 ($48.95, product #249102, LCBO, 595 Bay, 416979-9978, and others, lcbo.com).

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For every pair of organic bamboo Precise shades you purchase, Eynack donates two pairs of children’s glasses to public schools in Washington, DC ($100, eynack.com).

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DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

The Body Shop dedicates $300,000 of Christmas gift sales to their Community Trade Program, which helps to build schools in Ghana, Honduras, Nepal and India. The Joyful Gingerbread House Gift ($20, 220 Yonge, 416-9777364, and others, thebodyshop.ca).

640 College St 416-348-9200 marinellasrestaurant.com

tweet for a chance to win an Italian-designed Stella super clean, environmentally-friendly 4-stroke

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Ten per cent of proceeds from Jenny Bird’s Guardian Tusk collection silver and gold rings are donated to WWF Canada ($70 each, Holt Renfrew H Project, 50 Bloor West, 416-922-2333, and others, holtrenfrew.com).

All profits from this brass bird cage bookmark go to the Toronto Humane Society ($18, Starkers Corsetry, starkers.com).

Champetre jacket ($1,395, Beaufille, beaufille.com), METAmorph dress (pre-order, $100, Thieves, indiegogo. com/projects/metamorph-dress-by-thieves), Foxy Originals Empire earrings ($28), Foxy Originals Deco necklace ($50, both from Outer Layer, 577 Queen West, 416-869-9889, and other, foxyoriginals.com), Alanda Plain Derby oxfords ($150, Rockport, 220 Yonge, 416-5970646, rockport.ca).

JANUARY 31 TO FEBRUARY 13, 2014 CULINARY EVENT SERIES 16 ticketed culinary experiences that offer some of Toronto’s most diverse cuisine, notable chefs and unique venues.

ON SALE NOW! PRIX FIXE PROGRAM More than 200 of Toronto’s top restaurants offer 3-course prix fixe menus.

BOOK YOUR RESERVATIONS STARTING JANUARY 16, 2014

The Perfect Finish: Wine, Cheese & Chocolate Rosewater Feb. 6

Culinary Sensation with Executive Chef Rob Rainford Gossip Restaurant Feb. 9

High Tea Casa Loma Feb. 8 & Feb. 9

Intimate and Interactive with Mama Rosa and Sons 7 Numbers Feb. 10

Five Ways Dinner by The Group of Seven Chefs Parts & Labour Feb. 10

Breaking Bread with the Walshes Malaparte Feb. 11

The Art of Antipasto Cibo Wine Bar Feb. 12

An Aphrodisiac Adventure The Chefs’ House, George Brown College Feb. 13

For details and ticket prices: toronto.ca/winterlicious

Ten dollars from the sale of this Hostess Gift Duo go toward the Canadian Breast Cancer Support Fund ($30, Consonant, 2479 Yonge, 416-9252855, consonantskincare.com).

Interac and the Interac logo are registered trade-marks of Interac Inc. Used under license.

OM: Official Mark trademarked by the City of Toronto

®

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27

it’s perfect.

DON’T FIGHT THE CROWDS, WE’VE GOT KICK-ASS GIFTS FOR HIM

Kick-Ass 2 Self-made superhero Kick-Ass (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) and sweet-faced, foulmouthed assassin Hit Girl (Chloë Grace Moretz) try to return to life as “normal” teenagers, but soon they are faced with their deadliest challenge yet. To seek revenge for his father’s death, Red Mist (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) has reinvented himself as the leader of an evil league of super-villains. To defeat their new nemesis, Kick-Ass and Hit Girl must team up with a new wave of masked crusaders, led by the badass Colonel Stars and Stripes (Jim Carrey), in this battle of real-life villains and heroes.

Available now on Blu-ray™ & DVD

© 2013 Universal Studios. All Rights Reserved.

MORE CULT FAVOURITES FOR ANIME AND ASIAN ACTION CINEMA FANS

Akira: 25th Anniversary Also available on DVD

Drug War Also available on DVD

Guilotines Also available on DVD

IP Man: The Final Fight Also available on DVD

Saving General Yang Also available on DVD

Tai Chi Hero Also available on DVD

Wolf Children Also available on DVD

TIME IS REALLy TICKING... BUT DON’T WORRy - WE’VE GOT 28

december 19-25 2013 NOW

it’s perfect.

HE STARTED FROM THE BOTTOM, NOW HIS NEW ALBUM’S HERE

Drake

Nothing Was The Same Toronto’s own Drake launched his third studio album Nothing Was The Same in late September with much buzz and acclaim. With hits featuring the single “Started From The Bottom” and his current track “Hold On, We’re Going Home”, 2013 has been another massive year for the hugely popular rapper. Available now

MORE pERFECT HIp HOp ALBUMS FOR yOU TO WRAp Up BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE

Childish Gambino Because The Internet Featuring the single “3005”

Eminem The Marshall Mathers LP 2 Includes the singles “Berzerk” and “The Monster”

Jay Z Magna Carta... Holy Grail Includes the hits “Holy Grail” and “Tom Ford”

Kanye West Yeezus Includes “Black Skinhead”, “Blood On The Leaves” and “Bound 2”

The Weeknd Kiss Land Featuring the hits “Live For” and “Belong To The World”

THOUSANDS OF JUST-RIGHT GIFTS FOR EVERyONE ON yOUR HOLIDAy LIST! NOW december 19-25 2013

29

Holiday GIFT GUIDE Add a splash of Canadiana to your cocktail party with these made-inCanada stamped slate coasters.

Rock coasters ($12, Drake General Store, 1144 Queen West, 416-531-5042, and others, drakegeneralstore.ca ).

The new Sonos Play: 1 wireless speaker is compact and delivers deep, crystal-clear sound from two class-D amps and a 3.5-inch mid-woofer. ($219, Bay Bloor Radio, 55 Bloor West, 416- 967-1122, baybloorradio.com).

Call Of Duty: Ghosts Prestige Edition for PS4 comes with a 1080p HD “tactical camera� and extra digital content for a whole new level of immersion in a video game. ($199.99, Best Buy, 65 Dundas West, 416- 642- 8321, and others, bestbuy.ca).

For your favourite label whore: Lucian Matis Home soy candles with organic spa scents ($14.99-$29.99, Lucian Matis Home PopUp Shop, 23 Karl Fraser, 416-447-6087 ext 244, lucianmatishome.com).

30

DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

The Apple iPad Mini with Retina display is just as powerful as its big brother, but with a smaller footprint for those who prefer portability over screen size. ($419, Apple, Eaton Centre, 647-258- 0801, and others, apple.ca).

Be thankful these mouth-blown and hand-crafted Anton Studio fizz martini glasses are dishwasher safe when your guests finally leave and all you want to do is sleep. ($29.95/set of four, Linen Chest, 261 Richmond West, Unit 6, 416-260-2158, and other, linenchest.com)

Sip on Tealish Chocolate Loves Strawberry black dessert tea to wean yourself off holiday sweets ($10.95, the Big Carrot, 348 Danforth, 416-4662129, tealish.com).

Soothe the stress of sky-high shopping bills and guests who never leave with Stress-Fix body lotion, concentrate and soaking salts ($32.50, $25.50 and $46 respectively, Aveda, 2901 Bayview, 647-748-2004, and other, aveda.com).

Need some advice?

Find out what’s written in the stars, page 36.

Rob Brezsny’s Free Will

Astrology NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

31

Holiday GIFT GUIDE Fast-forward your kid’s reading and writing skills with the LeapFrog LeapReader. ($69.95, Mastermind Toys, 649 Mt. Pleasant, 416-440-0111, and others, mastermindtoys.com).

This Top Shelf set of 4 assorted oldfashioned glasses make sure you remember what exactly gave you that hangover. ($19.99, Linen Chest, 261 Richmond West, Unit 6, 416-260-2158, and other, linenchest.com)

Great for kids, but chances are your city councillor could benefit, too: Community Cooperative Game ($31.99, Grassroots, 408 Bloor West, 416-944-1993, and other, grassrootsstore.com)

Spirit of Giving DIRECTORY Nellie’s Shelter

Give the gift of HOME to a homeless woman or child today Donate now at www.nellies.org or call 416-461-0769 Charitable Registration: 11930-2727-RR0001

Gifts for the Future

Inspire change with your holiday gifts!

This holiday, give a gift that defends our environment and symbolically Adopt our Greenbelt for your friends and family. Find this gift and more at:

giftsforthefuture.ca

The holidays are almost here and Volunteer Toronto can help you find meaningful volunteer opportunities over the festive season.

What Whatdo doyou youREALLY REALLY want? want?

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To To live in the NOW? Discover Advaita: Philosophy of Unity Discover Advaita: Philosophy of Unity

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DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

These Thierry Lasry Poetry sunglasses cover up the unglamorous after-effects of too many late nights and too much hot buttered rum ($495, Josephson Opticians, 60 Bloor West, 416-964-7070, and others, 足josephson.ca).

NOW december 19-25 2013

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Holiday GIFT GUIDE

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Come to SPiN Toronto for the ping-pong, stay for the menu of local and sustainable comfort food (annual membership $750, 461 King West, 416-599-7746, toronto.spingalactic.com).

416.324.8333

24th Annual

Christmas Eve December 24, 10:30 PM

Auditorium doors open at 10:00 pm

Media Sponsor:

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Metropolitan Community Church of Toronto

invites you to their annual Christmas Eve Service featuring traditional Christmas music, The Choir of MCC Toronto with guest singers

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and a Christmas message offered by Rev. Dr. Brent Hawkes.

To purchase tickets call

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DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

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Wheelchair Accessible

ASL Interpreted

Because babies and toxic synthetics don’t mix, a 100 per cent natural and hand-crafted in northern Ontario Abundance Naturally baby gift set ($59.99, abundancenaturally.com).

Liquid dessert is the best kind: Inniskillin Oak Aged Vidal Icewine ($79.30, LCBO product # 19083 , lcbo.com).

Lorenza Filati pillow covers are fashioned from handwoven fabrics from different regions of Guatemala ($105-$115, Holt Renfrew H Project, 50 Bloor West, 416-922-2333, and others, holtrenfrew.com).

Travelling without your furry feline friend this season? A kitty luggage tag is the next best thing ($14, Ten Thousand Villages, 474 Bloor West, 416-5338475, and other, tenthousandvillages.ca).

Stylists use this Rowenta Precision Valet garment steamer at Fashion Weeks all over the world, so, sorry, it won’t “accidentally” ruin that ugly sweater Mom got you ($189.99, The Bay, 176 Yonge, 416-861-9111, and others, rowenta.ca).

music+Film+ interactive JuNE 13–22 o toroNtto

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astrology freewill

contests

Susan G. Cole ................................................ @susangcole Promotion expires Jan 31, 2014

tweet for a chance to win an Enzo DiMatteo ....................................@enzodimatteo Italian-designed Stella super clean, environmentally-friendly 4-stroke

#littleitalygalliano Norm Wilner ............................................@wilnervision Supported by:

Glenn Sumi ......................................................@glennsumi Julia LeConte ..............................................@julialeconte Steven Davey .............................@stevendaveynow Sarah Parniak ...............................................@s_parns John Semley .............................. @johnsemley3000 Ben Spurr ...............................................................@benspurr Jonathan Goldsbie ........................................@goldsbie

by Rob Brezsny

Aries Mar 21 | Apr 19 “Life is best or-

ganized as a series of daring ventures from a secure base,” wrote psychologist John Bowlby. Some of you Aries enjoy the “daring venture” part of that formula, but neglect the “secure base” aspect. That’s why your daring ventures may on occasion go awry. If you are that type of Ram, the first half of 2014 will be an excellent time to correct your bad habit. Life will be offering you considerable help and inspiration in building a strong foundation. And if you already appreciate how important it is for your pursuit of excitement to be rooted in well-crafted stability, the coming months will be golden.

Taurus Apr 20 | May 20 Here’s a tale of three renowned Taurus brainiacs: Immanuel Kant, John Stuart Mill and Bertrand Russell. They all had IQs over 175 and all made major contributions to philosophy. Yet all three were physically inept. Kant had trouble keeping a sharp point on his writing instrument, the quill, because he was clumsy using a knife. Mill was so un-dexterous he found it a chore to tie a knot. Russell’s physical prowess was so limited he was incapable of brewing a pot of tea.

Chances are that you are neither as brilliant nor as uncoordinated as these three men. And yet, like them, there is a disconnect between your mind and body – some glitch in the way the two of them communicate with each other.

The coming year will be an excellent time to heal the disconnect and fix the glitch.

Gemini May 21 | Jun 20 A horticultural company in the UK is selling TomTato plants to home gardeners. Each bush grows both cherry tomatoes and white potatoes. The magic was accomplished through handcrafted hybridization, not genetic engineering. I foresee a comparable marvel in your long-term future, Gemini. I’m not sure about the exact form it will take. Maybe you will create a product or situation that allows you to satisfy two different needs simultaneously. It’s possible you will find a way to express two of your talents in a single mode. Or perhaps you will be able to unite two sides of you that have previously been un-bonded.

Congratulations in advance!

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Cancer Jun 21 | Jul 22 “To destroy is always the first step in any creation,” said the poet E. E. Cummings. Do you buy that idea, Cancerian? I hope so, because the cosmos has scheduled you to instigate some major creative action in 2014. In ­order to fulfill that potential, you will have to metaphorically smash, burn and dissolve any old structures that have been standing in the way of the future. You will have to eliminate as many of the “yes, buts” and “I can’ts” and “not nows” as you possibly can.

Leo Jul 23 | Aug 22 When did you first

fall from grace? Do you remember? It has happened to most of us. We spend time being privileged or cared about or respected and then, suddenly, we no longer are. We lose our innocence. Love disappears. Our status as a favourite comes to an end. That’s the bad news, Leo. The good news is that I think the months ahead may be time for you to climb back up to one of those high states of grace that you fell from once upon a time. The omens suggest that even now you’re making yourself ready to rise back up – and sooner than you think, there will be an invitation to do so.

Virgo Aug 23 | Sep 22 Leonardo da

Vinci created the painting St. Jerome In The Wilderness around 1480. It now hangs in the Pinacoteca Vaticana, a museum in Vatican City. For several centuries, though, the treasured work of art was missing. Legend tells us that in the early 19th century, Napoleon’s uncle found the lower half of the painting in a junk shop in Rome. Years later he stumbled upon the top half in another back alley, where it was being used as a wedge in a shoemaker’s bench. I foresee the possibility of a comparable sequence unfolding for you in 2014, Virgo. You just may manage to restore a lost beauty to its proper place of honour, one step at a time.

Libra Sep 23 | Oct 22 The Italian painter Tintoretto (1518-1594) was a Libra.

He worked with such vigour and passion that he was nicknamed Il Furioso – The Furious. One of his crowning achievements was his painting Paradise, which is 74 feet long and 30 feet tall – about the size of a tennis court. It adorns a huge wall in the Doge’s Palace, a landmark in Venice. I propose that Tintoretto serve as one of your inspirational role models in 2014. The coming months will be an excellent time for you to work hard at crafting your own personal version of paradise on earth. You may not be so wildly robust as to deserve the title “Il Furioso.”

But then again, you might.

Scorpio Oct 23 | Nov 21 Between

2002 and 2009, Buddhist monk Endo Mitsunaga spent 1,000 days meditating as he did a ceremonial walk around Mount Hiei in Japan. In 2006, English writer Dave Cornthwaite took 90 days to skateboard across the entire length of Australia, a distance of 3,618 miles.

The first man’s intentions were spiritual, the second man’s adventurous. The coming months will be prime time for

12|19

2013

you to contemplate both kinds of journeys, Scorpio. The astrological omens suggest that you will generate extra good fortune for yourself by seeking out unfamiliar experiences on the open road. To get yourself in the mood, ruminate on the theme of pilgrimage.

Sagittarius Nov 22 | Dec 21 Many

farms in California’s Tulare County grow produce for supermarket chains.

Here’s the problem: those big stores only want fruits and vegetable that look perfect. So if there are brown spots on the apples or if the zucchinis grow crooked or if the c­ arrots get too big, they are rejected. As a result, 30 per cent of the crops go unharvested.

That’s sad because a lot of poor people who live in Tulare don’t have enough to eat. Fortunately, some enterprising food activists have begun to work out arrangements with farmers to collect the wasted produce and distribute it to the hungry folks. I gather there’s a comparable situation in your life, Sagittarius: unplucked resources and ignored treasures. In 2014, I hope you take dramatic action to harvest and use them.

Capricorn Dec 22 | Jan 19 Derrick Brown has a poem entitled Pussycat Interstellar Naked Hotrod Mofo Ladybug Lustblaster! I hope that at least once in 2014 you will get up the nerve to call someone you love by that name.

Even if you can’t quite bring yourself to utter those actual words, it will be healing for you to get to the point where you feel wild enough to say them.

Here’s what I’m driving at, Capricorn: in the coming months, you will be wise to shed any inhibitions that have interfered with you getting all of the freeflowing intimacy you’d love to have.

Aquarius Jan 20 | Feb 18 “Artists

who are content merely to hone their gifts eventually come to little,” says the Belgian writer Simon Leys. “The ones who truly leave their mark have the strength and the courage to explore and exploit their shortcomings.”

I’d like to borrow that wisdom and provide it for you to use in 2014, Aquarius.

Even if you’re not an artist, you will be able to achieve an interesting kind of success if you’re willing to make use of the raw materials and untapped potential of your so-called flaws and weaknesses. Whatever is unripe in you will be the key to your creativity.

Pisces Feb 19| Mar 20 In 2014, you will have the mojo to escape a frustration that has drained you and pained you for a long time. I mean you can end its hold on you for good. The coming months will also provide you with the chance to activate and cultivate a labour of love that will last as long as you live. While this project may not bloom overnight, it will reveal its staying power in dramatic fashion. And you will be able to draw on the staunch faith you’ll need to devote yourself to it until its full blessings ripen.

Homework: What do you want to be when you grow up? Testify at Freewillastrology.com.

ecoholic

Get your copy of Adria Vasil’s latest book, Ecoholic Body: Your Ultimate Earth-Friendly Guide To Living Healthy And Looking Good – in bookstores everywhere!

When you’re addicted to the planet By ADRIA VASIL

DETOX PLAYTIME: A GUIDE TO PLANET-FRIENDLY TOYS GIVING JUNKY TOYS MADE IN DUBIOUS CONDITIONS? UP YOUR GAME AND GO GREENER.

CAPTAIN AMERICA SOFT SHIELD This plastic shield bears the great dishonour of being deemed the most toxic toy of the year by U.S. Public Interest Research Group’s 28th annual Trouble In Toyland report. The play-fighting toy contains 29 times the allowable limit for neurotoxic lead. So if you’ve bought one already, return it. For the full lowdown on this year’s toys of concern, head to uspirgedfund.org. $12.

SCORE: N

3- IN-1 SOLAR ROBOT Award-winning company OWI Robots offers all kinds of solar and saltwater fuel cell kits for a range of ages. These made-in-Taiwan robots unfortunately don’t use recycled plastic and do have a military theme. Still, they teach kids how to harness the power of the sun.

This one transforms from a tank to a scorpion to a robot. Great for ages 10 and up. Available at Mastermind Toys and Grassroots. $19.95.

SCORE: NNN

ARTERRO WOOL FELT WEARABLES KIT This American-made “eco art” kit isn’t actually 100 per cent eco, but it’s supercreative, using all-natural materials like wool, glass and wooden beads as well as 100 per cent post-consumer recycled paper, and will soon contain fair trade and organic content. Bonus point for being assembled and shipped by a Goodwill employment program. There are also kits for bookmaking, garden art, felt bugs, art dolls and more. Available at Ava’s Appletree, 100-Mile Child and littlefootprintstoys.com. $22.

SCORE: NNNN

nature notes U.S. CURBS ANTI-BACTERIALS

Good news on the antibacterial front: last week the U.S. Food and Drug Administration announced it will be tackling widespread abuse of antibiotics as growth promoters for cows, chickens and pigs raised for meat. It’s part of the FDA’s strategy for dealing with the mounting threat of antibiotic-resistant

bacteria, linked in large part to factory farming’s overuse of the drugs.

Although the plan’s been attacked as toothless because it’s voluntary, supporters call it an important step. This just weeks after a judge ordered the FDA to stop delaying and take action on an old proposal to eliminate antibacterial triclosan from soaps. The FDA’s original proposal on triclosan dates to back to, oh, 1978. A lawsuit by the Natural Resources Defense Council has now brought the whole thing to a head, and the FDA recently agreed to move against triclosan in soaps by 2016. For its part, Health Canada’s promised to designate triclosan an official toxin.

Hope we’re not waiting until 2016.

ECOBUNK AWARDS When it comes to award ceremonies, normally it’s an honour just to be nominated (or at least that’s what the losers are told).

Not at the Toronto Environmental Alliance’s annual EcoBunk Awards “celebrating excellence in creative greenwashing.” In that case, there really are no winners.

Like this year’s recipient of the Four Wheels Good, Two Wheels Bad Award: a bizarre Mini-Cooper ad from Brazil in which the car goes on a terrorizing joy ride ripping up farmland, razing barns and running over chickens. Just plain odd. Closer to home, the prize in the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde category went to CN’s print ad on its “sustainable transportation solutions.” Together,” it soothes, “we deliver responsibly.” Really?

BURYING COAL POWER? Ontario’s putting the last nail in the coffin of dirty coal, sort of. With the introduction of Bill 138, Ending Coal For Cleaner Air Act, 2013, the province essentially seals the deal on becoming the first jurisdiction in North America to go “coal-free.”

Basically, it bans the use of coal by the end of 2014, imposing the maximum fines under the Environmental Protection Act if violated. However, glaring exemptions have been made for industry that burns coal during the production process. So businesses that burn coal but aren’t first and foremost electricity generating plants are still okay. That means Ontario may still get some coal in its stocking.

TE ST L

AB

GREEN TOYS ROCKET

CATE & LEVI JOURNAL

For the little Chris Hadfield wannabe in your life, this blue and red rocket is made in the U.S. of 100 per cent recycled plastic milk jugs. It’s got a detachable top capsule, two astronauts and lots of openable hatches, buttons and dials to play with. No BPA, phthalates, PVC or lead. Great for ages two and up. Available at Ecoexistence and greentoys.com. $34.99.

SCORE: NNNN

The T.O.-based international sensations and kings of reclaimed wool puppets/ stuffed animals do way more than upcycled teddy bears. This one-of-a-kind handmade reclaimed wool journal gives the little ones in your life space to pontificate on life’s journey. Plus, it’s stuffed with 100 refillable pages of entirely post-consumer recycled paper (supplied by another Canadian star, Ecojot) and made locally. $20. 100-Mile Child and ecoholic cateandlevi.com. pick SCORE: NNNNN

DIY GIFT OF THE WEEK CANADIANA BODY OIL This time of year, every flaky Canadian on your gift list should appreciate this dry skin kit. First off, get some petite glass vessels from a second-hand shop. Next, stir up your own premium Canadian body oil and/ or shaving oil with 40 per cent hemp oil (by Ontario’s Hempola or Manitoba Harvest) and 60 per cent organic sunflower oil (Quebec’s Maison Orphée offers some). Pour in a little optional sea buckthorn oil as a bonus nourisher (SBT makes BC-grown stuff).

To help preserve your blend, drizzle in antiseptic essential oil. If you really want to be singing the locavore song, add a dozen drops of lavender essential oil from QC-based BleuLavande.ca, then pop a sprig of dried lavender in the bottle for a final dose of pretty. Pair it with a small dry-skin brush if you like, and, bam, your loved ones will be bloody radiant.

green

DIRECTORY

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www.goodcatch.ca NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

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Get two patties in Toma Burger Addiction’s Monster.

Burger Addict

The kale-wrapped veggie tempeh burger (top left), the regular hamburger and the kale salad (inset) are all top-notch at P&L Burger; chef Matty Matheson (below) serves up both burgers.

Hail to the burger king P&L Burger could easily vie for best patty in town By Steven Davey P&L BURGER (507 Queen West, at

ñ

Vanauley, 416-603-9919, partsandlabour.ca, @partsnlabour) Complete meals for $15 per person, including tax, tip and a refillable fountain pop. Average main $9. Open Monday to Wednesday 11 am to 10 pm, Thursday to Saturday 11 am to 11 pm, Sunday 11 am to 9 pm. Closed some holidays. No reservations. Unlicensed. Access: barrierfree, minimal seating. Rating: NNNN

David Laurence

If the black hockey toque and red plaid lumber jacket don’t

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december 19-25 2013 NOW

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give it away, executive chef Matty Matheson of Parts & Labour’s monthold P&L Burger will tell you he’s one fierce Canuck.

“I’m very proud of this country,” says the former La Palette and Oddfellow chef. “So when I make a burger, it’s straight-up Canadian.”

We’ll say! He starts with 6½ ounces of houseground Ontario chuck that he smash-grills to order. The atypically juicy and nicely crusted patties are then sandwiched in ab­sorbent whiteflour buns from Sil­ver­stein’s Bakery on McCaul and dressed with the likes of peameal bacon, Canadian cheddar, iceberg lettuce, crispy deep-fried onions and back­yard barbecue sauce (The Castor) or roasted peppers, sautéed onions, mozzarella and marinara sauce (The Italian).

That’s Canadian, right?

To accommodate

the Birkenstock crowd, he grills great slabs of organic tempeh made from locally grown soy beans, then finishes them with more cheddar, tomato, onion and lettuce and a generous squirt of P&L sauce – aka ketchup, mustard, mayo, Sriracha and chopped pickle (The Big Tempeh, all $9).

Watching your gluten intake? Switch out your buns for leaves of frilly kale.

There are regulation Harvey’sstyle Yukon Gold fries ($3.50) that get gussied up with squeaky Quebecois cheese curds and what Matheson calls “rink gravy” to become poutine ($5.50), okay onion rings ($4) and a serviceable if overly processed coleslaw ($3).

Those seeking roughage will appreciate Matheson’s way upscale take on Caesar salad, its missing anchovies replaced by strong raw gar­lic, its traditional romaine with our friend Mr. Kale ($5). Tossed with shaved parmigiano and croutons fashioned from leftover hamburger buns, this dish is worthy of a plate instead of its current cardboard box.

3 stevend@nowtoronto.com | @­stevendaveynow

What local chef doesn’t dream of leaving a life of flipping burgers behind to cook in his or her own little boîte in the south of France? Thomas Sedille and Clémence Gossiaux have done the e ­ xact reverse.

Formerly of Le Reef near sunny Montpellier on the French Riviera, the couple have crossed the Atlantic to launch Toma Burger Addiction (712 Queen West, at Manning, 416901-1027, toma-burgeraddiction. com, @­Tomaburger, rating: NNN) on our wintry west side. Zut alors!

Pourquoi?

“Canada is a good country, no?” says co-owner/chef Sedille.

No argument here. We also can’t fault his Classic burger ($9.99), 6 ounces of hand-formed Angus prime rib dressed with Canadian cheddar, sautéed onion and tartarlike “secret” sauce, its traditional lettuce and ­tomato upgraded with arugula and dehydrated tomato carpaccio, all on an eggy housedbaked brioche-style bun. The Monster ($14.99) tastily ups the ante with two patties, four slices of cheddar, two rashers of doublesmoked bacon and a splash of chipotle mayo.

Thrifty herbivores might find it difficult to cough up nearly 13 smackers for a veggie burger of roasted eggplant and zucchini, mozzarella di bufala, pesto chutney and alfalfa sprouts (The Lovely Garden, $12.99) but not if they think of it as a salad with a lot of free bread.

For another five bucks, those of the opposite bent can turn their Fabulous Las Vegas – 6 ounces of juicy wagyu beef (and not the Kobe listed on the menu) in truffled mayonnaise ($19.99) – into a Double Jackpot ($24.99) with the addition of a pan-seared lobe of foie gras. He even truffles his French fries ($6.99)!

We also give props to an inviting room that looks like some futuristic A&W instead of an Uxbridge farmhouse circa 1938. Only Sedille’s generously portioned macaroni and cheese ($10.99) misses the mark, more cheesy Kraft Dinner than SD properly crusted ­gratin.

Critics’ Pick NNNNN Rare perfection NNNN Outstanding, almost flawless NNN Recommended, worthy of repeat visits NN Adequate N You’d do better with a TV dinner

✺

Indicates patio

Steven Davey

food&drink

Online RestauRant guide

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Check out our online

MONARCH TAVERN

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SINCE 1927

T.O.’s best new burgers

These are the patties we’ve noticed since our 2011 burger guide By Steven Davey

ñChase Fish & Oyster

Order the fingerling potato salad with the Steady’s burger.

10 Temperance, at Yonge, 647-3487000, thechasetoronto.com, @thechaseTO Although this always-slammed Bay Street boîte champions sustainable seafood, exCatch chef Nigel Finley’s house burger is worthy of its own fan club, especially when it’s 8 substantial ounces of naturally raised Cumbrae beef cooked gloriously medium-rare and dressed with sharp PEI cheddar, pickled jalapeño and parsley aioli ($20 with frites). It’s also one of the cheapest mains on the all-day menu!

Monday to Friday 11:30 am to 1 am, Saturday 5 pm to midnight, Sunday 5 to 10 pm.

Closed holidays. Reservations accepted. ­Licensed. Access: barrier-free. Rating: NNNN

ñRichmond Station

1 Richmond W, at Yonge, 647-7481444, richmondstation.ca, @richmondstn Our apologies to Mark McEwan et al.: Top Chef Canada season-two winner Carl Heinrich’s outrageously juicy patty stuffed with short rib trimmings on a house-baked milk bun dressed with aged cheddar and sweet beet chutney ($20 with skinny frites and roasted radish salad) is downtown’s new gourmet burger benchmark.

Monday to Friday 11:30 am to 10:30 pm, Saturday 5 to 10:30 pm. Closed Sunday, holidays. Reservations accepted. Licensed.

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12 Clinton St. | 416-531-5833 | themonarchtavern.com contact@themonarchtavern.com

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David Laurence

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Access: barrier-free, eight steps to washrooms. Rating: NNNNN

Samuel J. Moore

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barrier-free, four steps to washrooms. ­Rating: NNNNN

Carbon ’ated Back downtown, David Lee and the crew responsible for swanky Nota

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1087 Queen W, at Dovercourt, 416897-8348, facebook.com/thesamueljmoore, @TheSamuelJMoore This ambitious kitchen on the first floor of the Great Hall might look like it’s been around since the one-before-last fin de siècle, but chef Alexandra Feswick’s classic comfort food carte couldn’t be more contemporary. Look no further than her handchopped sirloin burger ($17) laced with bone marrow and fabulously sided with frites dusted with fresh rosemary and deep-fried garlic.

Wednesday to Sunday 5 to 11 pm, bar till 2 am. Weekend brunch 10 am to 4:30 pm.

Closed Monday, Tuesday, some holidays.

Reservations accepted. Licensed. Access:

ñSteady

1051 Bloor W, at Havelock, 416-5364162, thesteadycafe.com Described as “an ode to the backyard barbecue,” ex-Hogtown Vegan chef Vanessa Roebuck’s locally grown cheeseburger is grain-fed and hormone-free, beefed up with oatmeal and spinach. A terrific purple fingerling potato salad spiked with fresh corn and jalapeño makes a fitting side.

Wednesday to Saturday 5 to 11 pm. Weekend brunch 10 am to 3 pm. Café open daily from 9:30 am, bar till close. Closed Monday, Tuesday, holidays. Reservations accepted. Licensed. Access: bump at door, washrooms in basement. Rating: NNNN 3

Openings, closings, events and other news from T.O.’s food and drink scene It appears that popular east-side brunch spot Hammersmith’s (807 ­Gerrard East, at Logan, 416-7929043, hammersmithsbrunch.com, @_hammersmiths) is about to call it a day. Owner/chefs Brittany Peglar and Colin Reed are said to be looking for more suitable digs.

“My lawyer has advised me to not comment at the moment,” writes Reed in an email when asked about the resto’s immediate future. “I expect to have many comments in January.”

Search by rating, genre, price, neighbourhood, review & more!

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freshdish Hammersmith’s out?

Happy Holidays Check out our online

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ñEmerson

1279 Bloor W, at Lansdowne, 416532-1717, @EmersonToronto One-time Pastis toque Scott Pennock brings a certain Gallic je ne sais quoi to the wilds of Bloordale, most impressively with this family-friendly gastro-pub’s 8-ounce take on a Big Mac, here dressed not so secretly with creamy Beemster cheese sauce, chopped iceberg lettuce and a ­honkin’ huge dill pickle ($12).

Sunday to Thursday 5:30 to 11 pm, Friday and Saturday 5:30 pm to 2 am. Weekend brunch 11 am to 3 pm. Closed some holidays. Reservations accepted. Licensed. ­Access: two steps at door, washrooms in basement. Rating: NNNN

If everyone’s home is their castle, then Check out our online The Monarchguide is their castle away from home.

RestauRant

Bene have just launched the equally luxe Carbon Bar (99 Queen East, at Dal­ housie, 416-947-7000, thecarbonbar. ca, @­TheCarbonBar) in the original Citytv building. Some may remember it, however hazily, as the psychedelic Electric Circus nightclub before that.

Already known to regulars as TCB, the extravagantly renovated 150-seat room features vaulted ceilings, cozy leather banquettes and a southernfried carte of barbecued ribs and collard greens that stretches into the Caribbean.

Yule fuel Got a finicky foodie on your holiday gift list? Then make a beeline for the always fabulicious Fabarnak (519

Church, at Dundonald, 416-3556781, fabarnak.com, @fabarnak­ resto), where 24 hours’ notice and 19 bucks will get you one of the kitchen’s terrific tourtières. Made with layers of ground local beef and confited guinea fowl in a buttery quiche-like crust, they’re sure to sell out. Better still, order two – you deserve one yourself!

Caffeine scene After an 18-year run, the nonemore-indie Alternative Grounds on Roncesvalles has poured its last espresso. Groundskeeper Linda Burnside notes that Sunny Joe’s Café on nearby Sorauren continues to stock her eco-friendly fair trade beans. SD

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NOW december 19-25 2013

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drinkup WHERE TO DRINK RIGHT NOW

By SARAH PARNIAK drinks@nowtoronto.com | @s_parns

Jay Meyers, at Hudson Kitchen, makes his toddy with apple cider.

WHAT WE’RE DRINKING TONIGHT

Buckets and buckets of champagne cocktails

A classic champagne cocktail is so easy it’s stupid: soak a sugar cube in Angostura bitters, top with bubbly and you’re good to go. Fancier sparkling-topped concoctions include the Buck & Breck (cognac, bitters and absinthe in a sugar-frosted flute) and the French 75 (gin, lemon, sugar). If you feel like the Angel of Death is swinging a scythe around your cranium the next morning, just pop another bottle, squeeze some oranges and fix yourself a mimosa while patting yourself on the back for making it to 2014.

Try Perrier-Jouët Grand Brut (750 ml/ $65.95, LCBO 155341) or Tarlant Zero Brut Nature Champagne (750 ml/ $44.95, Vintages 996264).

HOT HOT TODDIES Feelin’ the chill? Keep it simple and rustle up this winter warmer Once upon a time before cocktails, there was the toddy.

It’s sometimes called a Whisky Skin, not, as I assumed, because it’s like a booze blanket when hell is freezing over, but in reference to the lemon skin that was often tossed in to season the most popular base spirit, whisky.

Back in the day, hot broths of hooch, sugar and water (sometimes spiced or bittered) were regarded as health tonics, perfectly acceptable homemade medicine for whatever ailed you – or the kids.

You may succumb to the sweet mist of nostalgia when toddy season rolls around, because at some point many of us drank it at home – when Grandma wanted to soothe our cough or Pops blearily declared that we deserved a festive treat at the grown-ups’ table.

Adding to its appeal is the utter simplicity of mixing a toddy in your kitchen. It’s like making tea, but easier – no steeping required.

How to mix a hot toddy

1. Stating the obvious, boil some water.

2. Pour a measure of your chosen booze into your favourite mug (anything from brandy or Irish whiskey to smoky Scotch or rich rum).

3. Throw some sugar into the mug. (Cocktail historian David Wondrich recommends rubbing a sugar cube with lemon rind to infuse the oils into it. He’s basically a genius.)

4. Top with hot water and garnish with whatever – a lemon twist, cinnamon stick, grated nutmeg.

TASTING NOTES

Jack Daniel’s Sinatra Select

DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

The hot buttered rum ($11) at Cocktail Bar (923 Dundas West, 416-792-7511, hoofcocktailbar.com) is the most delicious way to warm your cockles on a frosty eve, a rich mix of dark rum, spiced butter batter and hot water. I’ve never felt so great about clogging my arteries.

Over at Parkdale’s Geraldine (1564 Queen West, 647-352-8815, geraldinetoronto. com), Michael Mooney combines Armagnac and dark rum with his house-made Christmas batter (which includes butter, vanilla ice cream, orange zest, maple syrup, ginger, bitters and festive spices) in the Three Crooked Kings ($10) and tops it with grated cacao nibs.

Troy Gilchrist of Harbour 60 (60 Harbour, 416-777-2111, harboursixty. com) makes a mean Bombay Buttered Toddy ($18) with gin, Drambuie, mulled cider and an optional pat of butter for good measure.

The Apple Toddy ($14) at Hudson Kitchen (800 Dundas West, 416-644-8839, hudsonkitchen.com) is a boozy delight that’ll defrost your digits. Bartender Jay Meyers uses Scotch, Calvados and his housemade allspice dram with cider and pomegranate and maple syrups, finishing it off with torched cinnamon.

You don’t have to spend a fortune to add sparkle to your New Year’s bash 13th Street Cuvée 13 Sparkling Brut Rosé

ñ

Rating: NNNN Why A traditionalmethod wine blending Pinot Noir and Chardonnay, this bright sparkler offers fruit balanced by acidity and a hint of toast. It’ll make you want to put on your rose-coloured glasses and prance into 2014.

Price 750 ml/$24.95 Availability Vintages 147504

André et Costa Farnel Michel Prosecco ñ ñ Drappier Pinot Noir Brut Nature Champagne

Rating: NNNN Why NYE is extra-delightful when you don’t have to break your piggybank to party in style. I could drink this pretty wine in stained sweatpants and a sports bra and still feel like a million bucks.

Price 750 ml/$45.95 Availability Vintages 179275

Rating: NNNN Why Oh, prosecco – the sturdy foundation of so many raucous occasions and fond memories. This top-notch sparkling wine is citrusy, fresh and elegant, and, at 20 bucks a pop, easily justifiable.

Price 750 ml/$19.95 Availability Vintages 358382

EVENTS, OPENINGS & CLOSINGS, NEW RELEASES AND MORE

Seeking a special gift for whiskey fanatics?

Consider a bottle of Jack Daniel’s special release Sinatra Select, a robust, extrasmooth tribute to Ol’ Blue Eyes, the ultimate JD fan. The limited edition is aged in specially scored barrels that impart bold character and rich vanilla to this pleasantly smoky whiskey.

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Or let the experts do all the work

BEAUITFUL BUBBLIES

Charlie’s Burgers wine program

Charlie’s Burgers (charliesburgers.ca), T.O.’s noted dining experience, has one of the best wine programs ever. For a (modest) monthly fee, CB delivers unique bottles – unavailable in the LCBO or any wine shop – by bicycle (aw!) straight to your stoop. Along with amazing wines, get food pairing suggestions from the country’s top restaurants, where you’ll be charged no corkage fee to drink your CB bottles. Monthly deliveries are sprinkled with charming extra treats, so – pardon the cliché – this gift does keep on giving.

Ñ

= Critics’ Pick NNNNN = Ambrosial NNNN = Dangerously drinkable NNN = Palate pleaser NN = Sensory snooze N = Tongue trauma

T:9.833”

THE LCBO WINTER CRAFT COLLECTION

Season’s Greetings from

NOW december 19-25 2013

2

41

music BLONDE ELVIS

NIC POULIOT

the scene Shows that rocked Toronto last week

A$AP FERG with A$AP MOB at the Opera House, Wednesday, December 11. Rating: NNN

Harlem hip-hop crew A$AP Mob’s most famous member is pop crossover star A$AP Rocky, but coming up behind him is A$AP Ferg, a stocky street rapper known for combining oldschool, stop-start rhyming with skittery snares and sonorous bass.

While he reps left-field creativity in his music and image, his headlining turn on Mob’s Turnt x Burnt tour was more conventional.

After amping up the crowd with Lord and Dump Dump, Ferg ceded the mic to A$AP Twelvy, A$AP Nast and A$AP Ant, who took turns soloing with mixed results.

42

DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

The Mob were most successful when rapping energetically in unison but need to work on sustaining momentum during lesser-known verses.

Returning, Ferg played an A$AP Rocky medley in tribute to his famous friend that proved a red herring when Rocky appeared to girlie shrieks. The pair launched into summer anthems Work and Shabba and hosed down the crowd with celebratory champagne.

Ferg encored with introspective single Hood Pope as the audience bee-lined for the exits. One of the best songs on Trap Lord, it finally brought some of that emotional and stylistic diversity the A$AP name has KEVIN RITCHIE come to represent.

THE 9TH ANNUAL ANDY KIM CHRISTMAS SHOW at the Virgin Mobile Mod Club, Wednesday, December 11. Rating: NNN

U.S. GIRLS, BLONDE ELVIS, HOLLOW EARTH AND

ñSISSY BOY at 961a College, Saturday, December 14.

Rating: NNNN It’s a good sign that music fans are willing to struggle through a major snowstorm to see local bands playing a BYOB show in someone’s living room. And once you got over having to take your shoes off at the door, this very DIY show was more fun than most legit venues.

The charmingly sloppy post-punk of Sissy Boy kicked off the night. They show real potential but are still figuring out their overall direction. Following them, Hollow Earth had a different problem: their psych-prog sound is tightly defined and well honed, but where’s the album?

Next up were Blonde Elvis, the pop side project of Young Mother’s Jesse James Laderoute, who sound like a more punk rock version of the Smiths. It was the noise-drenched 50s R&B of U.S. Girls that made the biggest impression, though. Meg Remy has progressed big time as a performer, and is much more effective with a full band backing her up than as a solo artist.

For the ninth straight year, Canadian pop-rocker Andy Kim threw his Christmas Show, which raises money for his charity of choice (this year CAMH).

Kim, with his dyed-jet-black hairsprayed coif, perma-smile and earnest good-naturedness, is a natural emcee.

He and his band jammed together between the other acts, but musically, the evening’s highlights came via his special guests.

Early standouts were the Trews, who delivered an excellent cover of the Pretenders’ 2000 Miles, and Kardinal Offishall. But the main event was

BENJAMIN BOLES

= Critics’ Pick NNNNN = Perfect NNNN = Great NNN = Good NN = Bad N = Horrible

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more online

nowtoronto.com/music A new 50:50 cover video of Crystal Castle’s Alice Practice by the Dying Arts + Searchable upcoming listings

jingle all the way

There are more holiday shows this week than we can shout out. To help with your decision-making, we enlisted Canadian artists to fill us in on their favourite Christmas tunes. (Hint: the Pogues are very popular.) A preview of what’s in store, perhaps? By JULIA LECONTE The Pack A.D. Adeste Fideles “My favourite Christmas song is Adeste Fideles. Mostly for the singing. At my elementary school we were taught to really, really overemphasize the enunciation of all the words, stretching our mouths out into impossible contortions. It was a little crazy, but fun to sing that way. Try it and you’ll see.” – Maya Miller, drummer The Pack A.D. play the Edgefest Jingle Bell Concert Series at the Sound ­Academy tonight (Thursday, December 19), doors 7 pm, all ages. $24.50$49.50. RT, SS, TM.

Skydiggers Good King Wenceslas “I never get tired of playing Good King Wenceslas during the holiday ­season.

A great melody driven by a compassionate story, it reminds me of what is truly important not just during the holiday season, but year-round.” – Andy Maize, vocals and trumpet The Skydiggers play an Xmas Show with Devin Cuddy Band at the Horseshoe, Friday and S­ aturday (December 20 and 21), 10 pm. $27.50. TF.

U.S. Girls

Freeman Dre and the Kitchen Party Fairytale Of New York “Only one Christmas song matters: Fairytale Of New York, by the Pogues. We don’t play it, because it’s perfect the way it is, but I love it. Of all the holiday jingles, it may be the only one that’s based in any kind of reality.” – Freeman Dre, vocals, guitar Freeman Dre and the Kitchen Party play a Holiday Show at the Cameron House Friday (December 20), 10 pm. thecameron.com.

The Beauties Fairytale Of New York “Fairytale Of New York always struck me as such a romantic song – a ­romance you’d read in a Bukowski book. I’ve played it every Christmas for the past 25 years, and I’ve had to relearn it each time. It’s harder than it sounds.

Nothing really repeats; it’s as chaotic as the love story. The ­Beauties joke about it every year: that’s what we’ll get each other for Christmas – charts for Fairytale Of New York. You can bet we’ll pull it out at our Christmas show.” – Shawn Creamer, guitar, vocals The Beauties play the Dakota Tavern tonight (Thursday, December 19), 10 pm. thedakotatavern.com. julial@nowtoronto.com | @julialeconte

The Pack A.D.

Feist, who was filling in for Gord Dow­ nie. She seemed genuinely chuffed to be there, especially during a heartfelt Tragically Hip cover backed by Broken Social Scene bandmates Brendan Canning and Kevin Drew.

As it turns out, other BSS players were free that night, too. Justin Peroff, Jason Collett, David French and Charles Spearin all emerged. Amy Millan­, too, who had performed earlier in the evening. Seemed like a happy coincidence, and for a great cause. julia leconte

beyoncé at the Air

­Canada Centre, Monday, ñ ­December 16.

­Rating: NNNN Sexuality and femininity as power are

themes running throughout Beyoncé’s Mrs. Carter Show tour, which returned to the ACC for a rousing second leg. There was one change to the hit-parade­ set – she swapped Nigerian pop banger Grown Woman for reverby new ballad XO – and her all-female band was in tighter, playful form, morph­ing the Verve’s Bitter Sweet Symphony into power ballad If I Were A Boy and Kanye West’s Clique into menacing R&B jam Diva, funk-revue style.

Unlike her high-concept peers West and Lady Gaga, Beyoncé takes a more minimal approach to arena theatrics.

BeyoncÉ There was the requisite pop gaudiness – a trip to a Vegas boudoir during a Donna Summer homage, and a rendition of 1+1 atop a grand piano – but for the most part the staging was slickly efficient, the focus always on her fluttering vocals, curve-showcasing choreo­graphy and bright-eyed celebrity smile.

During wardrobe changes, interstitial videos depicted a glamorous journey of self-actualization that further underscored what was ­obvious: Beyoncé is a pop star at the top of her kR game.

NOW December 19-25 2013

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T H E •

W I T H

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M A S S E Y

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T O U R H A L L

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Tickets also available at all Ticketmas ter Outlets and by phone at 1-855-985-5000.

All dates , acts and ticket pr ices subject to change without notice.

Ticket pr ices subject to a pplicable fees .

DREAMTHEATER.NET 44

december 19-25 2013 NOW

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DOORS 7PM SHOW 8PM • RT, SS • 19+

TICKETS TO DRAKE HOTEL SHOW WILL BE HONOURED AT DOOR.

© 2013 Pirates Blend Records Inc. © 2013 Pirates Blend Records Inc.

Feeling the need to dance away the holiday calories? Bummed that cutbacks made your office party dull? We’ve combed the club listings for hot events to warm up your winter break.

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

NEIGHBOURHOOD WATCH The concept behind the Neighbourhood Watch parties is that all proceeds go back into releases by the artists involved. Tonight (December 19) at Parts & Labour (1566 Queen West) they celebrate their first vinyl EP release, featuring new music by Waterwalker (aka Nacho Lovers’ Bruce Trail and Jokers of the Scene’s Anti Hero), Mike Din and Vlsonn. See disc review, page 53.

KERRI CHANDLER The veteran New Jersey producer is one of the most consistently strong deep house DJs spinning today. Expertly balancing his soulful side with a futuristic edge, he’s known for seamlessly integrating live instrumentation into his performances. Catching him in an intimate venue like Wrongbar (1279 Queen West) will be a special treat for the old-school house heads.

ZEDS DEAD The Toronto duo have come a very long way since their early days throwing electro dubstep parties in the basement of the 751 pub. The hometown EDM stars headline the Sound Academy (11 Polson) for a night of monstrously big bass lines and punishingly hard beats.

OLIVER AND CLASSIXX Los Angeles duos Oliver (aka U-Tern and Oligee) and Classixx (aka Michael David and Tyler Blake) bring the space-age funk vibes of their Disco To Disco tour to the Hoxton (69 Bathurst) Friday (December 20). Expect lots of custom re-edits and one-of-a-kind bootleg remixes.

ON SALE FRIDAY APRIL 4 TOMORROW ‘MARTEL’ AVAILABLE THE GREAT HALL AT 10AM!

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NEW VENUE!

DOORS 7PM SHOW 8PM • ALL AGES

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T O U R

w/ Albert Hammond, Jr., The Skins

TUE JAN 14 • SOUND ACADEMY

THE STRYPES

MON JAN 20 • LEE’S PALACE

SAT APRIL 5 QUEEN ELIZABETH THEATRE SHOW 8PM

NEILFINN.COM

NEW POLITICS

TURNING POINT A Man Called Warwick’s long-running Turning Point party is the only place you’re going to hear these rare tropical funk records, which is why the Garrison’s (1197 Dundas West) dance floor is packed with loyal fans every month for his unique musical journeys around the equator.

3 benjaminb@nowtoronto.com @benjaminboles

ROBERT BABICZ The Polish/German techno veteran formerly known as Rob Acid brings his murky mind-melting sounds to 794 Bathurst for Box of Kittens’ and Platform’s joint holiday bash.

Expect things to get dark, dubby and gloriously weird.

MAY 6 KOOL HAUS

THE1975.COM

DIZZY HEIGHTS

ZEDS DEAD

No office party? No problem By BENJAMIN BOLES

THE DEADCOAST

FRIDAY MARCH 7 JAY MALINOWSKI THE DEADCOAST THE OPERA HOUSE TOMORROW! DEC 20 DOORS 7PM SHOW 8PM JAY MALINOWSKI THE DEADCOAST RT, SS • ALL AGES PHOENIX CONCERT THEATRE JAY MALINOWSKI

DECK THE DANCE HALLS

KERRI CHANDLER

w/ Magic Man, Sleeper Agent

TUE JAN 28 • THE OPERA HOUSE New Album Out Feb 10

STU LARSEN

THU MAY 1 • THE GREAT HALL

Ticket Location Legend: RT - Rotate This, SS - Soundscapes.

Follow us on

@LiveNationON

/LiveNation

Register at LiveNation.com to receive pre-sale access and special offers!

All dates, acts and ticket prices subject to change without notice. Ticket prices subject to applicable fees.

ROBERT BABICZ

OLIVER AND CLASSIXX NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

45

clubs&concerts hot JASON COLLETT’S BASEMENT REVUE Adelaide Hall (250 Adelaide West), tonight (Thursday, December 19) Collett-curated night of surprise guests.

CAGE THE ELEPHANT, THE PACK A.D. Sound Academy (11 Polson), tonight (Thursday, December 19) Punk-tinged rock & roll.

EXILE ON MAIN STREET w/ Michael Rault, Wayne Petti, Brian Okamoto, the Generals and others Silver Dollar (486 Spadina), tonight (Thursday, December 19) Tribute to the Stones’ 1972 album.

SKYDIGGERS, DEVIN CUDDY BAND Horseshoe (370 Queen West), Friday and Saturday (December 20 and 21) Roots rockers Xmas show.

THE WEATHER STATION Tranzac (292 Brunswick), Friday (December 20) Folk singer/songwriter.

A TRIBUTE TO LOU REED AND THE VELVETS w/ Mary Margaret O’Hara, Selina Martin, Kurt Swinghammer, Shotgun Wedding, Spike Love and others The Sister (1554 Queen West), Friday and Saturday (December 20 and 21) T.O. musicians pay homage.

tickets

ZEDS DEAD Sound Academy (11 Polson), Saturday (December 21) Electronic music duo.

KANYE WEST, KENDRICK LAMAR Air Canada Centre (40 Bay), Sunday and Monday (December 22 and 23) Yeezus tour makeup show.

A NIGHT OF NOISY WHACKED-OUT NONSENSE w/ Wolfcow, Alpha Strategy, New Horizzzons, Alpha Couple Handlebar (159 Augusta), Sunday (December 22) See Wolfcow preview, page 47.

JOHN MCDERMOTT, JASON FOWLER, CHRISTINE BOUGIE & OTHERS Hugh’s Room (2261 Dundas West), Monday (December 23) Folk legend Christmas show.

HIP-HOP

MEEK MILL

He was signed to Rick Ross’s Maybach Music group in 2011, shared XXL’s Freshman Class cover with Kendrick Lamar and Mac Miller the same year and produced two stellar Dreamchasers mixtapes shortly thereafter.

But you probably know Meek Mill best from his ubiquitous summer 2012 song Amen featuring Drake, which, thanks to CanCon got more play than a Canadian Tire commercial. (Plus, its Sunday-service sampling made it one of the catchiest, cleverest, most refreshing hip-hop tunes of the season.)

But the Philly native is no one-hit wonder. The rest of his Dreams And Nightmares album is a solid collection of heavy beats and party hits, including Young & Gettin’ It with Kirko Bangz.

An anticipated follow-up is due in 2014, but in the meantime, catch him live at Kool Haus just in time for the holidays. Get there early for one of Toronto’s best DJs – Lissa Monet – who spins pre-show.

Friday (December 20), doors 7 pm, at Kool Haus (132 Queens Quay East), $60-$200. INK, TZ.

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DEC 27 :: DANFORTH MUSIC HALL UPCOMING EVENTS AT: THE DANFORTH MUSIC HALL THE PICK BROTHERS AND OTHERS

Rivoli doors 8:30 pm, $5. December 27.

DEATH FROM ABOVE 1979 DECEMBER 26, 2013

RuPAUL’S DRAG RACE: BATTLE OF THE SEASONS JANUARY 11, 2014

SUN K Rivoli doors 9 pm, $5. December 28.

RUSTY, TUULI, TIME GIANT Horseshoe

doors 9 pm, $17.50. HS, RT, SS. December 28.

TASSEO, DONLANDS & MORTIMER, HIAWATHA, OUR FOUNDERS, LUKA Elvis Monday Drake Hotel

Underground doors 9 pm, free. January 6.

DISCLOSURE (LIVE) JANUARY 14, 2014

WARPAINT

MARCH 25, 2014

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FEBRUARY 2, 2014

PRIMAL SCREAM MAY 16, 2014

Tickets available at ticketmaster.ca, Rotate This, Soundscapes and Play De Record.

For info visit www.embracepresents.com.

46

DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

JUS MONI, AYO LEILANI, SHI WISDOM, DJS THEESATISFACTION

Black Weirdo: The Party The Steady Cafe & Bar $15, adv $12. EB. January 10.

KRYOMAN Cinema Nightclub. January 11.

NEIL YOUNG, DIANA KRALL Honor

The Treaties Tour: Athabasca Chipewyan First Nation Legal Defense Fund benefit Massey Hall 8 pm, $55-$250. RTH, TM. January 12.

ENSEMBLE PARAMIRABO, CHRISTOPHER WILLES Emergents II Music Gal-

lery 8 pm, $12. January 17.

A GREAT BIG WORLD Drake Hotel doors 8 pm, $15.50. TF. January 20.

ROYAL BANGS, BAD SUNS The Garrison doors 8 pm, $10. RT, SS, TF. January 23.

LENKA LICHTENBERG, FRAY, ECCODEK CD release & video launch Lula Lounge doors 8 pm, $12. EB. January 28.

LANTERNS ON THE LAKE Drake Hotel 8 pm, $12.50. RT, SS, TF. February 1.

DEL BARBER, RIDLEY BENT Double CD release Hugh’s Room 8:30 pm, $22.50 adv $20. February 6.

COLIN STETSON, MARNIE STERN, DIANA, COUSINS, PHÈDRE, TOPS, US GIRLS, THE WET SECRETS, ODONIS ODONIS Wavelength Music Festival: FOURTEEN Various venues. $10-$25, pass $49. RT, SS, TF. February 13-16.

SAM FERMIN The Garrison doors 9 pm, $11.50. RT, SS. February 15.

OLD MAN LUEDECKE, JORDIE LANE

Hugh’s Room 8:30 pm, $25, adv $22.50. February 18.

NICOLE ATKINS Horseshoe doors 8:30

pm, $12.50. HS, RT, SS, TF. February 18.

JOE PUG Drake Hotel doors 8:30 pm, $13.50. RT, SS, TF. February 19.

NICK WATERHOUSE Horseshoe doors 9 pm, $13.50. HS, RT, SS, TF. February 22.

GOO GOO DOLLS General Motors Centre doors 7 pm, $34.50-$69.50. LN. February 22.

LOST IN THE TREES The Garrison doors 8 pm, $13.50. RT, SS, TF. February 23.

TOUCHE AMORE, MEWITHOUTYOU, SEAHAVEN & CARAVELS Virgin Mobile Mod Club doors 7 pm, all ages, $20.50. RT, SS, TF. February 24.

PUBLIC SERVICE BROADCASTING

Drake Hotel. February 26.

WOLFCOW EXPERIMENTAL

Lo-fi artist will kick off 2014 with final solo effort

By SAMANTHA EDWARDS

WOLFCOW with ALPHA STRATEGY, NEW HORIZZZONS and ALPHA COUPLE at Handlebar (159

YOSHI COOPER

Augusta), Sunday (December 22), 9 pm. Pwyc. thehandlebar.ca.

At the centre of Toronto’s indie music Venn diagram, somewhere between pop and noise, is Wolfcow.

The brainchild of Greydyn Gatti, Wolfcow makes lo-fi recordings layered with fuzzy synth lines and drum machine thumps, otherworldly sound effects and sardonic vocals. But if you dig deep enough, beneath all the abrasive clatter

are jingle-worthy pop melodies.

“I never really felt like Wolfcow fit into any particular scene,” says Gatti over the phone during this winter’s first snowstorm.

“I was always too normal for the experimental scene but too weird for the rock band people.”

Which probably explains why Gatti’s flown under the radar for so long despite a prolific career that’s seen him release about 30 albums in 20 years.

(Fans who threw out their tape players back in the late 90s can listen to all his recordings on his rammed Bandcamp page.)

But his lone-wolf stature is suddenly more susceptible to change. The musical landscape has never been better suited (or perhaps better prepared) for Gatti’s brand of weird pop than in 2013 – a year that inaugurated the first-ever Cassette Store Day and embraced spirit brother Ariel Pink’s re-released early recordings.

Satanic Vacation, Wolfcow’s upcoming tape scheduled for a January release, marks the end of an era of sorts.

After two decades as a solo artist (and many years performing with backing musicians), Gatti is ready to record with his own band.

Exciting stuff, but the affable artist is far

more interested in talking about his new love for drag queen Divine (of John Waters films), the small-town record store he visited as a high schooler and how he survived the wolf band craze of the 2000s. (Think Wolf Parade, Wolfmother, AIDS Wolf.)

When pressed, however, it’s clear that Gatti is ready for his moment.

“I feel like I’ve been doing this lo-fi home recording for so long,” Gatti says. “I have a band now, I have access to all the gear and pretty much everything I need.”

If feels like Toronto is ready, too. music@nowtoronto.com

nced GARDENS & VILLA Drake Hotel doors 8:30 pm, $13.50. RT, SS, TF. February 27.

WAKE OWL, LYON The Garrison doors 8 pm, $16. RT, SS, TF. February 28.

G-EAZY These Things Happen Tour Virgin

Mobile Mod Club doors 7 pm, all ages, $17.50$40. PDR, RT, SS, TF. March 20.

LAKE STREET DIVE Horseshoe doors 9 pm, $15. HS, RT, SS, TF. March 28.

DUM DUM GIRLS, BLOUSE Lee’s Palace doors 9 pm, $20. HS, RT, SS, TF. March 29.

YES General Motors Centre doors 6:30 pm, all ages, $45-$65. LN. March 29.

THE HEAD & THE HEART, BASIA BULAT Kool Haus doors 7:30 pm, all ages,

$26.50. RT, SS, TF. March 30.

MOUNTIES, THE ZOLAS Lee’s Palace doors 9 pm, $20. HS, RT, SS, TF. April 5.

COMBICHRIST, WILLAM CONTROL Opera House doors 8 pm, $20.50. RT, SS, TF. April 10.

NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

47

this week

SOUTHSIDE JOHNNY’S Skip Tracer (rock/top 40) 9:30 pm.

TRANZAC TIKI ROOM Arachnidiscs Recordings

Double CD release party Beard Closet, Primate Pyramid, Babel, Sturm und Drang, Rillingen, Black Iron Prison 8 pm. See album review, page 53.

WISE GUYS Open Jam Jon Long 10 pm.

FOLK/BLUES/COUNTRY/WORLD

How to find a listing

CASTRO’S LOUNGE Jerry Leger & the Situation (folk/rock/country) 9 pm.

Music listings appear by day, then by genre, then alphabetically by venue. Event names are in italics. See Venue Index, page 52, for venue address and phone number.

F = Festive

CAVERN BAR & BISTRO Open Mic 9 pm.

C’EST WHAT Diesel Dog (roots fusion) 9:30 pm.

FREE TIMES CAFE Michael Pez 9 pm.

GROSSMAN’S The Thrill Harmonic 10 pm.

HAWAII BAR Luke Vajsar (solo bass) 9 pm.

HOLY OAK CAFE The Living Daylight String-

How to place a listing

HUGH’S ROOM Jesus VS Santa Wendell Fer-

= Critics’ pick (highly recommended) ñ 5= Queer night

band (old time) 7:30 pm.

All listings are free. Send to: music@nowtoronto.com. Include artist(s), genre of music, event name (if any), venue name and address, time, ticket price and phone number or website. Deadline is the Thursday before publication at 5 pm. Weekly events must confirm their listing once a month.

Thursday, December 19 POP/ROCK/HIP-HOP/SOUL

ADELAIDE HALL Jason Collett’s Basement Revue doors 8:30 pm. ñ ALLEYCATZ Lady Kane.

THE ANTLER ROOM The Terminators (rock)

9:30 pm.

CADILLAC LOUNGE Cadillac Lounge Toy Drive

Clang (rock).

CAMERON HOUSE Ollie Vee (retro rock) 10 pm,

Corin Raymond 6 pm.

FDAKOTA TAVERN Christmas Show The Beauties 10 pm.

DRAKE HOTEL UNDERGROUND Tupper Ware Remix Party Most Non Heinous (electro dance metal) doors 8:30 pm.

DRAKE HOTEL LOUNGE The Digs (funk/R&B/ soul) doors 11 pm.

FIRKIN ON KING Sandra & Ed Show 9:30 pm.

GLADSTONE HOTEL BALLROOM Ales Amps & Easels fundraiser for SKETCH Grey Kingdom, Hands & Teeth 8 pm.

HORSESHOE Ron Hawkins & the Do Good Assassins, Peter Elkas, Lindy doors 8:30 pm.

FLAKE AFFECT LOUNGE Xmas Freedom Train (rock/top 40).

LEE’S PALACE Flood the Sun, Forty Days at Sea. LINSMORE TAVERN The Rave 9 pm.

LOLA Brian Cober (double slide guitar) 9 pm.

MÉLANGE Open Stage Lee Van Leer 9 pm.

MUZIK Free The City: Free the Children/ Me to We benefit Kardinal Offishall.

THE PAINTED LADY The Donefors 10 pm, Elise LeGrow (indie pop/rock/soul) 8:30 to 9:45 pm.

PAUPER’S PUB Mike Barnes (rock) 10 pm.

THE PISTON Complaints Dept, Me & the Royal We, Heirloom Beats 9 pm.

RIVOLI Kennedy Cult, Valery Gore, Fitness Club Fiasco, Tiny Doom Gang doors 8:30 pm.

SILVER DOLLAR Exile On Main Street The Generals, Michael Rault, Wayne Petti, Suitcase Sam, Russell Fernandez, Brian Okamoto, Rock Rothwell and others 9 pm.

FSOUND ACADEMY Edgefest Jingle Bell Concert Series Cage the Elephant, the Pack AD doors 7 pm, all ages.

ñ

ñ

ñ ñ

48

DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

CIRKUT SPARKS

By RYAN PORTER You may not know his name, but anyone who’s been half-listening to the soundtrack in public spaces in 2013 can sing a hit touched by producer prodigy Henry Walter, aka Cirkut. Last week alone, the 27-year-old had three songs with his mentor, Dr. Luke, in Billboard’s Canadian Hot 100: Pitbull’s Timber, Miley Cyrus’s Wrecking Ball and Katy Perry’s Roar. The rest of his 2013 resumé name-checks Britney Spears, Robin Thicke and Jesse J. The Halifax native took a break from studio time with Perry and Bonnie McKee to reflect on his smash-packed year.

1. Wrecking Billboard

In September, Roar reached number one on the Billboard Hot 100 chart. It was dethroned the next week… by another Cirkut hit, Wrecking Ball. “I’m not all about charts, but it was a symbolic thing,” he says. After two weeks at number one in October, the Cyrus ballad swung back to the top spot in December. Cirkut gives credit to the pop star, who “sold it,” but also points to the beltable slow jam’s unique mix. “It hits all the right emotional chords that a ballad has, but it also has a visceral, futuristic sound to it.”

2. Grammy gold Not only did Cirkut score his first Grammy nomination on December 6, but it’s for one of the night’s biggest prizes: song of the year. He’s nominated along with Dr. Luke, Max Martin, McKee and Perry for Roar, and his steep competition includes Lorde, Pink and Nate Ruess, Bruno Mars, and Macklemore and Ryan Lewis.

3. California Dream At home in Toronto (where he still spends lots of time despite relocating to L.A.), Cirkut still co-owns Dream House studios, the Queen West space where he recorded High For This with the Weeknd. “It’s a great place for things to bubble – like a headquarters for us,” he says.

But his Beverly Hills-based Dream Machine music publishing and management company, which develops new producers and songwriters, is taking off as well – take Montreal writers OC and Kevin Figs, for example, who worked with Jesse J this year. And though he says it’s not uncommon to work a 14-hour day alongside Dr. Luke in the space he calls “Dream House L.A.,” the long hours are paying off. “I have learned so much from people like him [that] I am [now] bringing as much to the table,” he says. “I am no longer a student but an equal collaborator.” music@nowtoronto.com | @nowtoronto

guson, Katherine Wheatley, Johnny Dymond, Sean O’Grady 8:30 pm.

THE LOCAL The 444s 9 pm.

LOU DAWG’S North Of Nashville Ty Owens (country).

LULA LOUNGE Maracatu Mar Aberto, Mar Aberto SoundSystem, DJ General Eclectic (Brazilian) 8:30 pm.

RELISH BAR & GRILL Molly Thomason 7 to 9 pm.

REPOSADO The Reposadist Quartet (Gypsy bop).

TRANZAC SOUTHERN CROSS Manger League, Thom Gill 10 pm, Bluegrass Thursdays Houndstooth (bluegrass/old-time) 7:30 pm.

WISE GUYS Open Jam Jimmy James 10 pm.

ñ

JAZZ/CLASSICAL/EXPERIMENTAL

FARTS & LETTERS CLUB Christmas Concert David Johanns 8 pm.

EMMET RAY BAR Vokurka’s Vicarious Virtuoso Violin (Gypsy swing) 9 pm.

GATE 403 Annie Bonsignore & Dunstan Morey

Duo 9 pm, Sam Broverman Jazz Duo 5 to 8 pm.

HY’S STEAKHOUSE Christine Ghawi 7 pm.

JANE MALLETT THEATRE Discovery Series Phillip Addis, Emily Hamper (baritone, piano) 8 pm.

THE JAZZ BISTRO Duncan Hopkins Trio 9 pm.

KAMA Thursdays At Five Canadian Jazz Quartet, Mike Murley (saxophone) 5 to 8 pm.

FOLD MILL INN HOME SMITH BAR Thursday Night Holiday Jazz Party Hazel Walker, Graham Howes, Perry White, Pat Collins 7:30 to 10:30 pm.

THE REX Matt Stevens Quartet 9:30 pm, Amanda Tosoff Trio 6:30 pm.

ROOSTER COFFEE HOUSE Sam Dickinson, Rob Christian, Gram Whitty, Lee Clarke (jazz) 5 to 7 pm, Ewen Farncombe Trio (jazz) 3 to 5 pm.

FROY THOMSON HALL Creole Christmas Preservation Hall Jazz Band 8 pm.

ñ

DANCE MUSIC/DJ/LOUNGE

CRAWFORD Gray Twin Bash.

GOODHANDY’S T-Girl Party DJ Todd Klinck.5 HANDLEBAR Modern Lovers Hair Shop DJ

Party (Kosmische-esque post-punk dub/ ñ synth heavy/trippy) 8 pm.

HOLY OAK CAFE Easy Listening (cumbia/electronic) 10 pm.

MIDPOINT Nintendo Thursdays (80s Vs 90s).

PARTS AND LABOUR Neighbourhood

Watch Record Release Party Waterwalkñ er, Visonn, Mike Din and others. See album review, page 53.

RIVOLI POOL LOUNGE DJ Bunitall (R&B/hip-hop).

SWITCH TORONTO DJ North Prep (electro/

continued on page 50 œ

concerts at

leespalace.com

Original Live Music @ 8:30pm horseshoetAvern.com street West / spadina Fridays & Saturdays @ 9:00pm 370 Queen artist Bookings Front Bar 12:00pm - 2:00am 416-598-0720 or craig@horseshoetavern.com

529 Bloor street West / Bathurst

Artist Bookings

416-598-0720 or ben@leespalace.com

vcw boxing week wrestling Challenge

fri

thurs

dec 20

dec 26

$10.00

5pm Doors 6pm Show

@Door

$10.00

tues

dec 31 $22.50

adv

thursday • no cover

adv

friday

jan 01- jan 02

sat

dec 21

closed for

@Door

fri

$8.00

$7.00

harMOnautS skullians deforesters CyClops 76-6-6 rebel arms

@Door

dec 22-dec 25 closed for

holidays

red SandS BLOOdy Five king beez fermented oranges

annual Xmas dec Punk Blowout!

28 sat

$12.50

sat

jan 03 $7.00

dec 28

adv

jan 03

peter elkas + lindy

@Door

fri: the socials + dangerband + the dying arts saturday: tUUli + timE giaNt

fri

SAT

tues

JAN 04

dec 31

$7.00

$25.00

sat

saturday

@Door

adv

dec 21

$27.50 adv

with DEViN CUDDy baND

mon

monday • no cover

dec 23 no cover

@Door

NO COVER

with StUDENt i.D.

black pastels

dec 24 - dec 26 closed for

holidays

mon

dec 30 no cover

labCats the commoners broken aRROwS maps • barbarosa fevers MaLadieS OF adaM StOkeS the BOx tiger barbudos fri

dec 27

dec 20

holidays

$7.00

fri

dec 19

adv

harLan PePPer

$11.50

thurs

& the do good assassins

fri

cOLd PineS BiLLiard BLOSSOM dOg iS BLue BOnnie traSh

2nd floor of lee’s palace 10:00pm — 2:30am

$17.50

with canned food donation

dec 27

alternative rock dance club

west hammock neiL thOrntOn

wed january 01 closed for

holidays

2 sets! 11:15 & 1:15

MicrOnite FiLterS the crux 5.00 blaCk stone @Door wiLL hunter Band

thurs

jan 02 $

skye wallace oxford blue low animal tues

jan 07

no cover

Adv Tickets @ TickeTfly.com • Ticketmaster.ca • Rotate This • Soundscapes • H-Shoe front Bar

friday DECEmbER 20 @opera house • $ 18.00 advance • all-ages

tues fEb 11 @ opera house $22.50 adv • all-ages • doors 6:00pm

oFF with their heads sights & sounds direct hit! fri fEbRUaRy 28 @the phoenix • $ 24.50 adv • all-ages • doors 6:30pm

DEafhEaVEN + iNtRONaUt + thE kiNDRiD tuesday

sun maRCh 30 @kool haus • $ 26.50 adv

fEbsound 18

sat fEbRUaRy 22 lee’s palace • $26.50 advance

stray from the path & more!

& thE jiCkS

thurs maRCh 27 @phoenix concert theatre • $ 29.50 adv

mon apRil 7 @opera house

big blaCk DElta + ROmaN REmaiNS

PianOS BecOMe the teeth + ManSiOnS

gary numan danforth music hall

all-ages

the phoenix • $ 27.50 advance

like moths to flames

tuesday may 13

academy

tues fEbRUaRy 11

$19.50 advance • all-ages

saturday jUNE 14 @echo beach $ 37.50 advance • all-ages • 3pm doors

$ 25.50 - $ 29.50 advance

monday fEbRUaRy 24 mod club • $20.50 advance

on sale this saturday @ ticketmaster

february 14 • $ 18.00 adv

valentine’s

tues DECEmbER 31 dance cave • $ 12.50 adv

saturday

fEbRUaRy 1 $ 10.50

burlesque

jaNUaRy 11 • $ 13.50 advance

lee’s palace advance

wed jaNUaRy 22 lee’s palace • $ 13.00 adv

mon fEbRUaRy 10 horseshoe • $ 15.50 advance

february 21 • $ 16.50 adv

forgotten rebels north mississippi allstars

jaNUaRy 14 • $ 15.50 advance

a great

big world

march 4 • $ 21.50 adv

april 5 • $ 20.00 advance

kevin devine jaNUaRy 15 • $ 12.00 advance

sat fEbRUaRy 15

jaNUaRy 21 • $ 10.50 advance

lee’s palace • $ 15.00 adv

jaN 10 @hard luck • $ 13.50 adv • all-ages

jaN 16 @hard luck • $ 13.50 adv • all-ages

weekend cate lebon jaNUaRy 21 • $ 12.50 advance

fEbRUaRy 22 • $ 10.00 adv

casket girls xiU xiU maRCh 9 • $ 10.00 advance

fEbRUaRy 1 • $ 12.50 advance

lanterns ON thE lakE

fEbRUaRy 9 • $ 11.50 advance

maria taylor

tues jaNUaRy 14 $ horseshoe • 11.50 advance

fEbRUaRy 18 • $ 10.50 adv

tOgEthER pangea fEbRUaRy 19

february 6 • $12.50 adv

nOrthcOte dave hause

fEbRUaRy 13 • $ 10.50 adv

robert ellis

• horseshoe tavern •

february 18 • $12.50 adv

friday jaNUaRy 17

jim jones horseshoe • $ 13.50 advance

nicole atkins february 22 • $13.50 adv

nick waterhOuSe

joe pug revue white denim • $ 13.50 adv

march 3 • $15.50 advance

maRCh 23 • $ 12.00 advance

son lux

the millwinders

DaNy laj & thE lOOkS

maR 27 @hard luck • $ 16.50 adv • all-ages

march 6 • $13.50 advance

• horseshoe tavern • NOW december 19-25 2013

49

clubs&concerts œcontinued from page 48

house/hip-hop/trap) 10 pm.

Troika Vodka Boutique Magik Thursdays DJ Magik Mike 10 pm.

WAYLA Bar Random Play DJ Dwayne Minard (70s/80s) 10 pm.

Wild Indigo Martini Bar Classic Joints DJs Caff & Greedo (new jack swing/rap/freestyle/house) 10 pm.

Friday, December 20 Pop/Rock/Hip-Hop/Soul

Alleycatz Lady Kane.

The Antler Room Mondo Bizarro (pop rock)

9:30 pm.

Cadillac Lounge The Kat Kings (roots rock).

FCameron House Holiday Show Freeman Dre & the Kitchen Party 10 pm.

Castro’s Lounge The Untameable Ronnie

Hayward (rockabilly) 5 to 7 pm.

Drake Hotel Underground Sara B & the Booth Boyz, the Trailer Park Casanovas doors 8 pm.

The Garrison Fort York Holiday Show Fort York, Wax Atlantic, Odd Years (indie folk/­ indie rock) doors 9 pm.

The Great Hall Danny Michel 9 pm.

Hard Rock Cafe Rocking The Foundation: Heart & Stroke Foundation benefit concert Affinity, Jason Dodge, Minority 905, Operation Midnight Danger, the Dreadful Starlings, the Maysides, Paul J McInnis 8 pm.

The Hideout The Disco Rebels (rock) 10 pm.

FHorseshoe Xmas Show Skydiggers, Devin Cuddy Band 10 pm.

Hugh’s Room An Evening With Rik Emmett 8:30 pm.

Kool Haus Meek Mill (hip-hop/rap) doors 7 pm.

FLake Affect Lounge Christmas Affect Cameron Fraser, Alexander Quail, Martin Rouleau.

Lee’s Palace Polarity, Organ Thieves, Still Life, Trove doors 9 pm.

ñ ñ

SUNDAY DECEMBER 19

HO HO T.O. FRIDAY DECEMBER 20

DR. DRAW’S

STRANGE PARADE HOLIDAY SHOW 2013 SATURDAY DECEMBER 21 Presented by OZMOZIS

SIMON PATTERSON

Linsmore Tavern The Salads (pop rock) 9:30 pm.

Lola The Gypsy Rebels 8 pm.

Magpie Taproom The Green Ray, Gold Pony 9 pm.

FMeasure Capitol Beat Christmas Blowout

The Capitol Beat, DJ Juicy (soul/pop/rock) doors 9 pm.

Opera House The Flatliners, Off with Their Heads, Sights & Sounds, Direct Hit! doors 7:30 pm, all ages.

Phoenix Concert Theatre The Devil Wears Prada, the Ghost Inside, Volumes, Texas in July doors 6 pm, all ages.

FRivoli STK Xmas III Union Duke, Still the King doors 9 pm.

Saving Gigi Prosimii, Trog 8 pm.

Silver Dollar Fever City, the Kerouacs, the Zilis, Bamboo doors 9 pm.

The Sister A Tribute To Lou Reed Kurt Swinghammer, Mary Margaret O’Hara, Aidan Closs, Tim Vesely, Selina Martin, Chris Bottomley, Yawd Sylvester, John Southworth, Dave Robinson, Dave Celia and others 9 pm.

Sound Academy Touriosity Monster Truck, Walking Papers doors 8 pm, all ages.

Southside Johnny’s 40 Sons (rock) 10 pm.

FVirgin Mobile Mod Club Strange Holiday Benefit Party Dr Draw & the Strange Parade,

ñ

DJs Medley, James Drummond 8 pm.

Folk/Blues/Country/World

3 Windows Open Jam Dano & Miss Jaye 9

pm to 1 am.

FBlack Swan Readers & Songwriters

S­ easonal Celebration Donna Marrin, Pete Otis, Pat Little, Paul Cross, Joanna Gale, Peter Verity, Darwin Bruce, Glen Hornblast, Brian Gladstone, Holli Irvine, Sheila Horne and others doors 7 pm.

Cameron House Patrick Brealey (folk rock/ roots) 8 pm, David Celia 6 pm.

Gate 403 Fraser Melvin Blues Band (blues) 9 pm.

Gladstone Hotel Melody Bar Rae Billing (country) 9 pm.

FGrossman’s Toby Hughes’s Rock & Roll Xmas Party 10 pm.

Holy Oak Cafe Chuck Erlichman (folk) 10 pm.

Lou Dawg’s Acoustic Blues Mike Costantini, Pat Wright (blues/funk/rock/soul).

Lula Lounge Changui Havana (salsa) 10:30 pm.

Relish Bar & Grill The Danger Bees 9:30 pm.

Tranzac Southern Cross The Weather Station 7:30 pm, the Foolish Things (folk) 5 pm.

ñ

Jazz/Classical/Experimental

Array Space Solar Ascension Pierre Mongeon

& eVoid Collective (freeform music & movement) 7:30 to 9:30 pm.

Gate 403 G Street Jazz Trio 5 to 8 pm.

Hy’s Steakhouse Christine Ghawi 7 pm.

FImperial Pub Christmas Show kith&kin, the Poinsettias 8:30 pm.

The Jazz Bistro Duncan Hopkins Trio 9 pm.

Lula Lounge Jim Heineman Trio (jazz) 8 pm.

FMusic Gallery Little Match Girl Passion Katherine Hill, Patricia O’Callaghan, Lucas Marchand, Dallas Bergen, Grex.

Old Mill Inn Home Smith Bar Fridays To Sing About David Statham Trio (jazz) 7:30 to 10:30 pm.

FPalais Royale Holiday Swing Time Alex Pangman & Her Alley Cats, Drew Jurecka, Terra Hazelton, Roger Clown, DJ/MC Jaymz Bee doors 8 pm.

The Rex Sara Dell (vox/solo piano) 6:30 pm, Hogtown Syncopators 4 pm.

FThe Rex Jake Wilkinson’s Xmas 9:45 pm.

FRoy Thomson Hall Handel’s Messiah Toronto Symphony Orchestra 8 pm.

Tranzac Southern Cross Jonathan Lindhorst (jazz) 10 pm.

ñ ñ

Dance Music/DJ/Lounge

Cabin Nightclub The Legendary Groove

­Fridays Spence Diamonds & Mista Jiggz (R&B/funk/soul/hip-hop/house and more).

Bathurst Platform & Box Of ­Kittens Christmas Bash Robert Babicz, ñ Jamie Kidd, Mike Gibbs, Nature of Music 10 pm.

F794

Andy Poolhall Moves DJs Barbi, Brains-

4Breakfast, Gabe-A & Caff (dancefloor anthems/guilty pleasures) 10 pm.

Cameron House Back Room P-Dubs.

Castro’s Lounge Record Party DJ ‘I Hate You Rob’ (soul/funk/R&B/punk rock/rockabilly/ power pop) 10 pm.

Club 120 Underwear Party DJs Jay & J 10 pm.5 Drake Hotel Underground Lay These Knight DJs Famou$ Players, Patrick McGuire doors 11 pm.

Emmet Ray Bar DJ Tophey (90s) 10 pm.

Fly Pop Fridays DJ Sumation doors 10 pm.5 The Hoxton Disco To Disco Tour Oliver & Classixx doors 10 pm.

FLola Dr X-Mas. Maison Mercer Wild Child Tour Adrian Lux, Audien doors 10 pm.

The Painted Lady Soul Sonic DJ NV (hip-hop/ funk/soul/Motown/mashups) 10 pm.

The Piston Rebel Hop (reggae/soul/dancehall) 10 pm.

Rivoli Pool Lounge DJ Stu (classic rock & roll).

The Steady Cafe & Bar ALT Night DJs Dislexia,

ñ

continued on page 52 œ

Making It Offishall We’re not sure exactly what it means to be a creative e ­ xecutive director for an A&R company, but congrats to ­Kardinal Offishall for recently nabbing that title at Universal Music Canada. The hip-hop musician will assist the label in finding and nurturing new ­talent in this country and beyond and bring his writing and producing talents to UMC’s marketing, promotion and communications teams.

And though his last, er, official album came out way back in 2008, it doesn’t look like the new job is putting a crimp in his music-making: he plays Muzik (15 Saskatchewan, 416-595-9998), tonight (Thursday, December 19) as part of a benefit for Free the Children/Me to We.

Going Viral Though it’s damn near impossible to find television stations or shows broadcasting music videos any more, that hasn’t stopped bands from making them. Videos have moved online, where they’re more popular than ever. And for the second year, the Prism Prize will award $5,000 to the best Canadian one. A jury of industry professionals picks faves, announcing the short list on February 18 and the winner on March 23. (Rich Aucoin’s Brian Wilson Is A.L.I.V.E. took top honours for 2012.) So if you know about a fantastic video made between January 1 and December 31, 2013, suggest it to prismprize.com/contact.

Give a Little Bit It’s the season of giving, don’t forget. And why not catch some live music while you’re at it? The Hard Rock Cafe hosts a Heart & Stroke Foundation benefit on Friday (December 20) with rockers Affinity, Jason Dodge, Minority 905 and others. Electronic violinist Dr. Draw plays the Virgin Mobile Mod Club that same night, with proceeds going to help underprivileged children in Sri Lanka and South Asia. At the Rivoli on Saturday (December 21), Tyson Froese, the Joy Arson, Savannah, Here Below and Ready the Prince play to assist the Red Door Shelter. $10, and warm clothing donations are welcome. The Wooden Sky, meanwhile, play in support of the Daily Bread Food Bank, with Nick Ferrio opening, on December 29. 918 Bathurst. $20, with 100 per cent of proceeds going to the food bank.

SATURDAY DECEMBER 28 Presented by UNION EVENTS

WHITE PANDA

W/ NEON KNIGHTS, THE WET BANDITS & JAKS NYE TUESDAY DECEMBER 31

722 COLLEGE STREET

themodclub.com

50

December 19-25 2013 NOW

T.O. Music Notes

HOME OF THE BLUES SINCE 1943 THANK YOU TORONTO FOR MAKING US A BEST BLUES BAR FINALIST!

THURSDAY DEC 19

THE THRILL HARMONIC 10pm-2am

Thurs Dec 19

BARE CLAWS COMPLAINTS DEPT. ME & THE ROYAL WE HEIRLOOM BEATS

DJ BRITTNEY + THE SOUL PROPRIETOR Fri Dec 20 DENNIS P ON SAX

LOVE HANDLE

SATURDAY DEC 21

Tues CLOSED Dec 24 - Thu HAPPY HOLIDAYS! Dec 26 FROM ALL OF US AT THE PISTON

SUNDAY DEC 22

NEW ORLEANS CONNECTION ALL STAR JAZZ BAND 4:30-9pm THE NATIONAL, BLUES JAM with BRIAN COBER 10pm-2am

10 THE BEAUTIES & FRIENDS CHRISTMAS SHOW PM

Tix $15 at Door ($12 with canned good) 7 THE WOODEN HORSEMEN & PASCOE 10 SAMANTHA MARTIN & THE HAGGARD

Fri Dec 20

PM

REBEL HOP

Sat DJs CATALIST + FAMOUS LEE Dec 21 BOOGIE FUNK DANCE PARTY

THE HAPPY PALS 4:30-8pm BEGGAR’S BANQUET 10pm-2am

Thu Dec 19

PM

FRIDAY DEC 20

TOBY HUGHES ROCK & ROLL XMAS PARTY 10pm-2am

THE DAKOTA TAVERN

SERVING GREAT FOOD • 5:30 - 10:30PM! 416.532.3989 • 937 Bloor Street West www.ThePiston.ca

Sat Dec 21

BLUEGRASS BRUNCH

NEW!

10-2PM

10PM

BLUEGRASS BRUNCH HOT ROCKS members of Blue Rodeo,

Sun Dec 22 10PM

JIMMY BYRON

BEAU’S Presents Sundays 10-2pm

Flash Lighnin’ & The Beauties doing Stones & CCR

THE OSSINGTON THU 19 KILO PAPA Musical and cocktail explorations...

FRI 20 SWEAT PANTS w/DJ Coolin… Hip hop, soul. RnB, dancehall, reggae...deep grooves...

SAT 21 ALL SOULED OUT w/The Secret Models... Hit-crazy dance party...the prom that always wasn’t...

SUN 22 COOL SPINNINGS Non-Xmas related beat party...

Tue/Wed Dec 24 & 25 Closed - HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!

Tues Dec 31 10PM NEW YEAR’S EVE with

MON 23 LAST DANCE AT OSS last chance before family lockdown...

TheDakotaTavern.com

THU 26

THE ROYAL CROWNS Tix $20 at

249 OSSINGTON AVE (just north of Dundas) 416-850-4579 · thedakotatavern.com

TUE 24 & WED 25

CLOSED

OPEN FOR BIZ

61 OSSINGTON AVE | 416•850•0161 | theossington.com

MONDAY DEC 23

NICOLA VAUGHAN

9:30pm- 2am

TUESDAY DEC 24 6PM - DEC 26

CLOSED MERRY XMAS TO ALL TUESDAY DEC 31

NEW YEAR’S EVE

WITH CAUTION JAM

416-977-7000

GROSSMANSTAVERN.COM

379 SPADINA AVE (JUST S. OF COLLEGE) PARKING AVAILABLE

THIS THURSDAY & FRIDAY

Jaral De Berrio & Dos Equis Present

a very

THE REPOSADISTS XMAS

EZCAL MERRY M THIS SATURDAY & BOB’S DAY ROBWORLD” MON“MARSHMALLOW w/SPECIAL GUESTS

POWER DUO

Jaral De Berrio & Dos Equis Present

MONDAY

a very

MERRY MEZCAL MONDAY

REPOSADO 12.10.TUESDAYS 12 FRIDAY DECEMBER 20

LAST PLANET - XMAS PARTY

FT. LUSH, MR BROWN, BRIZLY, LOVE HZ, SWIVL EVERY SATURDAY SHAKE A TAIL SUNDAY DECEMBER 22 HALFWITS HOLIDAY JAM /LETLIVE AFTER PARTY EVERY MONDAY LEGENDS OF KARAOKE EVERY TUESDAY WATCH OUT! EVERY WEDNESDAY WHAT’S POPPIN

LATE

TUESDAY DECEMBER 31 GET BLOWN DANCE PARTY

www.reposadobar.com

W/DJ ELLIS DEAN

$6.00 COCKTAILS

ALIEN RADIO

W/DJ GORD

RESPY POSVSA. DSLYO VS. SPY 12.10.12 TUESDAY DECEMBER 31

WEDNESDAYS

NEW YEARS EVE AT REPOSADO www.reposadobar.com

EVERY 1’S

A WINNER NYE2013@REPOSADO DJ Gord C spins 70’s Funk & RnB Complimentary party favours & midnight bubbly Pay-what-you-can cover charge OR Book our private room for your NYE celebrations!

TORONTO’S LARGEST LIST OF 100% AGAVE SPIRITS REPOSADO BAR & LOUNGE

136 OSSINGTON AVE (Between Queen & Dundas) 416-532-6474 | reposadobar.com

TWEET #Holidees

DAILY TAPAS & COCKTAIL SPECIALS

THU DEC 19 | DRS 8:30PM | $10 ADV/$12 DR

anchorSHOP

TM

PRESENTS

KENNEDY CULT

W/ FITNESS CLUB FIASCO TINY DOOM GANG & VALERY GORE

TICKETS AVAILABLE AT WWW.TICKETFLY.COM FRI DEC 20 | DRS 9PM $10 w/ NON-PERISHABLE FOOD BANK DONATION ($15 WITHOUT)

STK XMAS III // UNION DUKE + STILL THE KING SAT DEC 21 | DRS 8PM | $10

BENEFIT FOR RED DOOR SHELTER WARM CLOTHING DONATIONS WELCOME

TYSON FROESE, THE JOY ARSON, SAVANAH, HERE BELOW, READY THE PRINCE SUN DEC 22 | DRS 9PM | $10

DYLAN MURRAY APIANWAY EMPIRES NEW CLOTHES ON EVEREST MON DEC 23 | DRS 8:30PM | $5

MC CHRIS LOCKE BRYAN HATT, ADAM CHRISTIE, TRIXX, ALEX PAVONE, DANNY POLISHCHUK, PADDY FORDE, RHIANNON ARCHER, MICHAEL KHARDAS, STEVE PATRICK ADAMS & MORE! WWW.ALTDOTCOMEDYLOUNGE.COM TUE DEC 24 & WED DEC 25

CLOSED!!

THUR DEC 26 | DRS 8PM | $5

INDIE NIGHT

PHIL KNOX SANDY PEARLMAN & BONES TUES DEC 31 | DRS 10PM | $25 ADV $30 DOOR BUMP N’ HUSTLE + GARAGE 416 + FOOTPRINTS PRESENT

NEW YEAR’S EVE 2014 ON BOTH FLOORS!

TIX : EVENTBRITE.COM, PLAY DE RECORD, COSMOS & THE RIVOLI

332 QUEEN ST. W. | 416.596.1908 | rivoli.ca NOW december 19-25 2013

51

5 to 8 pm.

clubs&concerts œcontinued from page 50

Betti Forde 10 pm.

WAYLA Bar Le Kif Kif Kittens & Cougars DJ Sticky Cuts (retro top 40/house/hip-hop) 10 pm.

FWrongbar Holiday Underground Kerri Chandler, Felix & Gani, DJ Illo.

ñ

Saturday, December 21 Pop/Rock/Hip-Hop/Soul

Alleycatz Lady Kane.

Cadillac Lounge The Kat Kings (roots rock).

Cameron House Jane’s Party (Canadian

roots) 10 pm, Whitney Rose 8 pm, Thelonious Hank 6 pm.

Cameron House Back Room Art & Woodhouse (singers/songwriters).

Drake Hotel Underground We Rise: Typhoon Haiyan fundraiser The Plaitwrights, the Charleston Relay, the Airplane Boys, John River, C2 Genesys (R&B/soul) doors 7 pm.

The Hideout Stone the Radio, the Joy Arson (rock) 10 pm.

FHorseshoe Xmas Show Skydiggers, Devin Cuddy Band 10 pm.

Lake Affect Lounge The Pie Guys & Conor Gains 4 to 8 pm.

FRevival Midnight Mix Holiday Food Drive Wrispect, Illiment, J-Class, JB Allen (hip-hop/ R&B/mashup/electro/reggae).

The Rex Danny Marks (pop) noon.

Rivoli Red Door Shelter Benefit Tyson Froese, the Joy Arson, Savannah, Here Below, Ready the Prince doors 8 pm.

FSilver Dollar Holiday Show Scam Artists, Ethel & the Mermen, Transcab, Oh Darling!, Drywall Heels doors 8 pm.

The Sister A Tribute To Lou Reed Christian D, Arthur Renwick, Shotgun Wedding Band, Janitors, Noble Savages, Spike Love, Alex Pulec, Sarah Holland, Alex Ross, Michelle McKinnon, Johnny & the X’s 9 pm.

ñ

Gladstone Hotel Melody Bar Rory Taillon 9 pm.

Grossman’s Beggar’s Banquet 10 pm.

Hugh’s Room Christmas Jacob Moon, Diane

Braithwaite, Chris Whiteley, Ken Whiteley, Ali Matthews 8:30 pm.

Linsmore Tavern We Walk the Line (Johnny Cash tribute) 9:30 pm.

The Local Ron Leary (singer/songwriter) 9 pm.

Lou Dawg’s Jeff Eager (acoustic blues/funk/ rock/soul).

Lula Lounge Conjunto Lacalu (salsa/Cuban sonora) 10:30 pm.

Relish Bar & Grill Susies Alibi 9:30 pm, Songbird Sessions 1 to 4 pm.

The Rex Winter Solstice Blues Jerome Godboo, Eric Schenkman, Gary Craig 3:30 pm.

Southside Johnny’s Malachi Crunch 10 pm, The Bear Band (rock/blues) 4 to 8 pm.

Tranzac Southern Cross Riverrun (indie) 10 pm, Jonathan Feldman Trio 7:30 pm, Jamzac 3 pm.

Tranzac Tiki Room People Still Gots Ta Eat, Daily Bread Food Bank Fundraiser 8 pm.

Jazz/Classical/Experimental

Gate 403 Tevlin Swing Band 9 pm.

Glenn Gould Studio Handel’s Dublin

Blue Goose Tavern Danny B’s House Party

­Messiah Aradia Ensemble 8 pm.

Grossman’s The Happy Pals (trad jazz) 4:30 to 8 pm.

Hy’s Steakhouse Christine Ghawi 7 pm.

FThe Jazz Bistro Duncan Hopkins Trio 9 pm, Swingalong Saturday Brunch: Songs Of The Season in support of the Daily Food Bank & CBC’s Sounds Of The Season Jenni Burke 12:30-2:30 pm.

Nawlins Jazz Bar Sam Heineman (piano) 6:30 to 8:30 pm.

Old Mill Inn Home Smith Bar Jazz Masters Frank Wright Trio 7:30 to 10:30 pm.

Paul’s Churrasco The Tavares Trio/Botos (jazz/Latin) 7:30 to 11:30 pm.

The Rex Jeff King’s Catalyst 9:45 pm, Parker/ Abbott Duo 7:30 pm.

FRoy Thomson Hall A Chorus Christmas, Fanciful Fantasies Toronto Children’s Chorus 2 pm.

FRoy Thomson Hall Handel’s Messiah Toronto Symphony Orchestra 8 pm.

Seven44 Climax Jazz Band (trad jazz) 4-7 pm.

FSt James Catholic Church Christmas With Naria Naria (opera-pop) 7:30 pm.

Cadillac Lounge Mary & Micky (country)

Dance Music/DJ/Lounge

ñ

ñ

Folk/Blues/Country/World

The Danny B Band (blues harp) 3 to 6 pm.

3:30 pm.

Castro’s Lounge Big Rude Jake (blues shout-

er) 4:30 pm.

C’est What The Boxcar Boys (wild Gypsy/ Dixieland jazz/Klezmer) 3 pm.

Dakota Tavern Bluegrass Brunch 10 am to 2 pm.

FFlato Markham Theatre Leahy Family Christmas Leahy (Celtic jigs/­ carols/medleys) 2 and 8 pm.

FThe Flying Beaver Pubaret Christmas Show: Unplugged Whiskey Jack (bluegrass/ country) 9 to 11 pm.

Full of Beans Coffee Open Mic Will 1 to 4 pm.

Gate 403 Bill Heffernan (folk/country/blues)

ñ

ñ

ñ

BassLine Music Bar REWORK DJs Paul

­ evered, Ben Marchal & Kilowatts (house/ R techno spectrum) 10 pm.

FBunda Lounge Solid Garage Xmas Party Dino & Terry, Groove Institute 10 pm.

Cake Bar DJ North Prep (top 40) 10 pm.

FCinema Nightclub Naughty Xmas DJ Undercover, Peter Lavalle 10 pm.

FThe Circus Academy West UNION Holiday Warehouse Edition Nathan Barato, the Junkies, Carlo Lio doors 9 pm.

Clinton’s Shake, Rattle, Roll (60s rock/pop/ soul) doors 10 pm.

Drake Hotel Underground Quatro Conor Cutz & Rouge doors 11 pm.

ñ

Win TickeTs! collective concerts presents

ellioTT Brood Tuesday, December 31

Doors: 8:00pm / Show: 9:00pm Lee’s Palace $22.50 / 19+ RT/SS/HS O n s ale n o w. C h e c k o u t c o l l e c t i ve c o n c e r t s .c o m f o r m o r e inf o.

The sadies

Tuesday, December 31

Doors: 8:30pm / Show: 10:00pm The Horseshoe Tavern $25.00 / 19+ HS/RT/SS

Visit nowtoronto.com/contests to enter!

One entry per household.

52

December 19-25 2013 NOW

Drake Hotel Lounge DJ Dougie Boom doors

Southside Johnny’s Open Jam Rebecca

Emmet Ray Bar DJ Blancon (hip-hop) 10 pm.

Fly Fly Saturdays DJs Sumation, Kevin Bailey

FTranzac Southern Cross Jessica Bundy

11 pm.

doors 10 pm.5

The Garrison Turning Point A Man

Called Warwick doors 10 pm. ñ Grasslands Root Down DJ Fish (hip-hop/

Matiesen & Phoenix 9:30 pm.

10 pm, Marianne Girard 3 pm.

FTranzac Main Hall Flying Cloud Christmas Party.

Winchester Kitchen & Bar Open Mic Porter 9 pm.

Jazz/Classical/Experimental

soul/indie) 9 pm.

Guvernment Tommy Trash 10 pm.

FHandlebar Soulstice Kensington Festival Of Lights Afterparty Gentlemen Soul Brothers, CEC (funk/break/soul/nu-disco/house/edits).

FHarbourfront Centre I Love T.O. Holiday Skating Party: Winterfest On Toronto’s Waterfront DJ Dlux, DJ Lissa Monet 8 to 11 pm.

FHarlem Underground Christmas Party DJ Mykel Blackcat 10 pm.

Holy Oak Cafe Nite Flights DJs Sandro Perri & Matt McLaren (tropicalia/funk) 10 pm.

Hot Box Puff Lounge Daniel Waples.

The Hoxton Chainsmokers doors 10 pm.

NEU+RAL BLOWUP (indie/Britpop/Mod) 10 pm.

The Painted Lady Music By Salazar 10 pm.

The Piston Love Handle (funk/soul/boogie) 10 pm.

Rivoli Pool Lounge DJ Plan B (hip-hop/rap/ club).

Six Degrees Dwele, DJs Max B & Renegade Squad.

Sneaky Dee’s Shake A Tail (60s pop/soul) 11 pm.

Sound Academy Alerter States Tour Zeds Dead doors 10 pm.

The Steady Cafe & Bar Blood, Sweat & Queers Fawn BC 10 pm.5 Virgin Mobile Mod Club Open Up Simon Patterson (six-hour open-to-close marathon).

FWAYLA Bar Balls Of Holly DJ Shane Percy & DJ Aural Heat (top 40) 10 pm.

Wrongbar Rustie doors 10 pm.

F794 Bathurst UNION Holiday Edition Nathan Barato, the Junkies, Carlo Lio doors 8 pm.

Bovine Sex Club Metal Health 9 pm.

Castro’s Lounge Watch This Sound (rare ­vintage ska/reggae/dub) 9 pm.

The Hoxton Been Trill doors 10 pm.

The Red Light 80s Dance Party 9 pm.

Sunday, December 22

Monday, December 23

Pop/Rock/Hip-Hop/Soul

Pop/Rock/Hip-Hop/Soul

ñ

ñ

Air Canada Centre The Yeezus Tour Kanye West, Kendrick Lamar 7:30 pm.

Cadillac Lounge Whiskey Jack (bluegrass/ country) 4 to 7 pm.

Dominion on Queen Rockabilly Brunch The Cosmotones (old-school rockabilly) 11 am to 3 pm.

FDrake Hotel The Goodtimes Xmas Show (children’s concert) doors 3 pm.

Handlebar A Night Of Noisy Whacked Out Nonsense Wolfcow, Alpha Strategy, New Horizzzons, Alpha Couple (noise rock/ lo-fi experimental/electronic/psych spectrum). See preview, page 47.

The Hideout Don Campbell (acoustic rock) 10 pm.

Holy Oak Cafe Nick Persons, Majik Max Kelly (experimental hip-hop) 9 pm.

FLake Affect Lounge Christmas Party The Meteors & Dawn Tyler Watson 4 to 8 pm.

FThe Painted Lady Xmas Bash Robert Scott, Great Bob Scott, Chris Gartner, Tim Bovaconti, the Bee People, Rusty Mcarthy, Spookey Ruben, Serafin, Fred Speck, Richard Underhil, Chris Bottomley & All Star Band and others 9 pm.

Paradise Bar & Billiards Terry Logan Trio 4 to 7:30 pm.

Rivoli Dylan Murray, ApianWay, Empires New Clothes, On Everest doors 9 pm.

Seven44 Mike McKenna All-Stars w/ Steven Ambrose 5 to 9 pm.

ñ

ñ

Folk/Blues/Country/World

Black Bear Pub Jam SNAFU 3:30 to 7:30 pm.

Cadillac Lounge The Danny B Blues Band

7:30 pm.

Cameron House The Double Cuts (western

swing) 10 pm, Joanne Mackell 6 pm.

Dakota Tavern Bluegrass Brunch 10 am to 2 pm.

Free Times Cafe Tim Maxwell, Glen Hornblast, Arthur Renwick, Peter Matheson 8 pm.

Full of Beans Coffee Pete Janes (folk) 2 to 4 pm.

Gladstone Hotel Melody Bar Acoustic Family Brunch (bluegrass) 11 am to 2 pm.

Grossman’s The National Blues Jam Brian Cober (double slide guitar) 10 pm.

The Local Los Caballeros del Son (Cuban traditional son) 9 pm, Chris Coole (banjo old-time/country) 5 pm.

Lula Lounge Roda de Samba & Batucada Carioca (Cuban music) 8 pm, Jorge Maza Group (Cuban music) 1 pm.

Relish Bar & Grill Stir It Up Sundays Open Mic 9 pm.

Rose & Crown Music City North Open Mic 9 pm.

Sotto Voce Wine Bar Sunday Music Session Open Mic.

ñ

Gate 403 Dwight Grant 9 pm, Jeff Taylor & the SLT 5 to 8 pm.

Grossman’s New Orleans Connection All Star Jazz Band 4:30 to 9 pm.

The Jazz Bistro A Month Of Sundays Micah Barnes Trio 12:30 pm.

Kanji Duane Forrest (jazz/soul/bossa nova) 7:30 to 10:30 pm.

FMassey Hall Sing-Along Messiah Tafel­ musik 2 pm.

FMetropolitan United Church Candlelight Service Of Lessons And Carols Metropolitan Choir, Angus Fung 7 pm.

The Rex Tim Postgate 7 pm, Bossa Tres (bossa nova/samba/jazz/Latin) 9:30 pm, Club Django 3:30 pm, Excelsior Dixieland Jazz noon.

FRoy Thomson Hall Handel’s Messiah Toronto Symphony Orchestra 8 pm.

FSt Matthews Cathedral Amahl & The Night Visitors Denise Williams, Marcus Nance, Lawrence Cotton, Yan-Chuen Lee, the Toronto Onyx Lions Club, Opera By Request 4 pm.

FTranzac Southern Cross Holiday Party Diane Roblin & Reconnect (jazz) 7:30 to 9:30 pm.

ñ

Dance Music/DJ/Lounge

Air Canada Centre The Yeezus Tour Kanye West, Kendrick Lamar 7:30 pm. ñ Castro’s Lounge Rockabilly Mondays The Cosmotones 9 pm.

Drake Hotel Underground Elvis Monday

Leslie Mooerly, Marlon Chaplin, Boy Pussy, Mark Watt doors 9 pm.

Drake Hotel Lounge Yuka (funk) doors 10 pm.

Grossman’s Nicola Vaughan (pop rock) 9:30 pm.

The Hideout Big Otter Creek (acoustic rock) 10 pm.

Folk/Blues/Country/World

Cameron House Weatherstone 10 pm, Rae Billing (country) 6 pm.

C’est What Jack Walker (singer/songwriter)

9:30 pm.

Dora Keogh Open Stage Julian Taylor, Dora Keogh Choir 9:30 pm.

Free Times Cafe Open Stage Mondays Alex Zdravkovic 7:30 pm..

FHugh’s Room Christmas Show John McDermott, Jason Fowler, Maury LaFoy, Christine Bougie, Michael Johnson, Dave Matheson, Ariana Gillis 2 & 7:30 pm.

The Local Hamstrung String Band (bluegrass/traditional country) 9 pm.

Lou Dawg’s Ryerson Open Mic Don Campbell.

Magic Oven Queen E Magic Mondays Open Jam Shahi (soul/R&B/jazz/funk) 9 pm to midnight.

The Painted Lady Open Mic Mondays 10 pm.

Relish Bar & Grill Bentroots (New Orleans blues) 8 pm.

Tranzac Southern Cross Open Mic Mondays 9 pm.

ñ

Jazz/Classical/Experimental

Emmet Ray Bar Jon Lindhorst (jazz) 9 pm.

FHoly Oak Cafe A String Quartet Christmas

9 pm.

Kitch Luke Vajsar (solo bass).

Lola The Big 3 (old jazz) 6 to 9 pm.

The Rex Peter Hill Quintet 9:30 pm, Jim Gelcer

Groups 6:30 pm.

Dance Music/DJ/Lounge

Reposado Mezcal Mondays DJ Ellis Dean.

Thompson Hotel 1812 Bar Blacklist DJ PG-13.

Tuesday, December 24 Dance Music/DJ/Lounge

The Painted Lady DJ Lady Luck 8 pm.

Wednesday, December 25 Happy Holidays.

3

Venue Index

Cabin Nightclub 559 College.

3 Windows 372 Queen E. 416-366-3366.

794 Bathurst 794 Bathurst.

961A College Art Space 961A College.

Adelaide Hall 250 Adelaide W. Air Canada Centre 40 Bay. 416-815-5500.

Alleycatz 2409 Yonge. 416-481-6865.

Andy Poolhall 489 College. 416-923-5300.

The Antler Room 146 Front W (down the alley).

Array Space 155 Walnut. 416-532-3019.

Arts & Letters Club 14 Elm. 416-597-0223.

BassLine Music Bar 865 Bloor W. 416-732-7513.

Black Bear Pub 1125 O’Connor. 416-752-5182.

Black Swan 154 Danforth. 416-469-0537.

Bloke & 4th 401 King W. 416-477-1490.

Blue Goose Tavern 1 Blue Goose. 416-255-2442.

Bovine Sex Club 542 Queen W. 416-504-4239.

Bunda Lounge 1108 Dundas W. Cadillac Lounge 1296 Queen W. 416-536-7717.

Cake Bar 214 Adelaide W. 416-599-2253.

Cameron House 408 Queen W. 416-703-0811.

Castro’s Lounge 2116 Queen E. 416-699-8272.

Cavern Bar & Bistro 76 Church.

C’est What 67 Front E. 416-867-9499.

Chalkers Pub 247 Marlee. 416-789-2531.

Cinema Nightclub 135 Liberty. 416-588-2888.

The Circus Academy West 213 Sterling, suite 100. 647-748-6030.

Clinton’s 693 Bloor W. 416-535-9541.

Club 120 120 Church.

Crawford 718 College. 416-530-1633.

Crocodile Rock 240 Adelaide W. 416-599-9751.

Curzon 1192 Queen E. 416-850-3650.

Dakota Tavern 249 Ossington. 416-850-4579.

Dominion on Queen 500 Queen E. 416-368-6893.

Dora Keogh 141 Danforth. 416-778-1804.

Drake Hotel 1150 Queen W. 416-531-5042.

Emmet Ray Bar 924 College. 416-792-4497.

Firkin on King 461 King W. 416-979-5464.

Flato Markham Theatre 171 Town Centre Blvd (Markham).

905-305-7469.

Fly 8 Gloucester. 416-410-5426.

The Flying Beaver Pubaret 488 Parliament. 647-347-6567.

Free Times Cafe 320 College. 416-967-1078.

Full of Beans Coffee 1348 Dundas W. 647-347-4161.

The Garrison 1197 Dundas W. 416-519-9439.

Gate 403 403 Roncesvalles. 416-588-2930.

Gladstone Hotel 1214 Queen W. 416-531-4635.

Glenn Gould Studio 250 Front W. Goodhandy’s 120 Church. 416-760-6514.

Grasslands 478 Queen W. 416-504-5127.

The Great Hall 1087 Queen W. 416-826-3330.

Grossman’s 379 Spadina. 416-977-7000.

Guvernment 132 Queens Quay E. 416-869-0045.

Handlebar 159 Augusta. 647-748-7433.

Harbourfront Centre 235 Queens Quay W. 416-973-4000.

Hard Rock Cafe 279 Yonge. 416-362-3636.

Harlem Underground 745 Queen W. 416-366-4743.

Hawaii Bar 989 Dovercourt. 416-786-7880.

The Hideout 484 Queen W. 647-438-7664.

Holy Oak Cafe 1241 Bloor W. 647-345-2803.

Horseshoe 370 Queen W. 416-598-4753.

Hot Box Puff Lounge 204 Augusta. 416-203-6990.

The Hoxton 69 Bathurst. 416-456-7321.

Hugh’s Room 2261 Dundas W. 416-531-6604.

Hy’s Steakhouse 120 Adelaide W. 416-364-6600.

Imperial Pub 54 Dundas E. 416-977-4667.

Jane Mallett Theatre 27 Front E. 416-366-7723.

The Jazz Bistro 251 Victoria. 416-363-5299.

Kama 214 King W. 416-599-5262.

Kanji 1346 Queen W. 416-536-8448.

Kitch 229 Geary. 647-350-4555.

Kool Haus 132 Queens Quay E. 416-869-0045.

Lake Affect Lounge 1 Port E (Mississauga). 905-274-8223.

Lee’s Palace 529 Bloor W. 416-532-1598.

Linsmore Tavern 1298 Danforth. 416-466-5130.

The Loaded Dog 1921 Lawrence E. 416-901-0662.

The Local 396 Roncesvalles. 416-535-6225.

Lola 40 Kensington. 416-348-8645.

Lou Dawg’s 589 King W. 647-347-3294.

Lou Dawg’s Ryerson 76 Gerrard E. 647-349-3294.

Lula Lounge 1585 Dundas W. 416-588-0307.

Magic Oven Queen E 360 Queen E. 416-703-3555.

Magpie Taproom 831 Dundas W. 647-350-8305.

Maison Mercer 15 Mercer. 416-341-8777.

Massey Hall 178 Victoria. 416-872-4255.

Measure 296 Brunswick. 416-477-5645.

Mélange 172 Main. 416-686-6485.

Metropolitan United Church 56 Queen E. 416-363-0331.

Midpoint 1180 Queen W. 647-895-4171.

Monarch Tavern 12 Clinton. 416-531-5833.

Music Gallery 197 John. 416-204-1080.

Muzik 15 Saskatchewan. 416-595-9998.

Nawlins Jazz Bar 299 King W. 416-595-1958.

NEU+RAL 282 Augusta.

Old Mill Inn 21 Old Mill Rd. 416-236-2641.

On Cue 349 Jane. 647-763-0417.

Opera House 735 Queen E. 416-466-0313.

The Painted Lady 218 Ossington. 647-213-5239.

Palais Royale 1601 Lake Shore W. 416-533-3553.

Paradise Bar & Billiards 940 Danforth. 416-466-7981.

Paul’s Churrasco 839 College St. 416-532-2777.

Pauper’s Pub 539 Bloor W. 416-530-1331.

Phoenix Concert Theatre 410 Sherbourne. 416-323-1251.

The Piston 937 Bloor W. 416-532-3989.

The Red Light 1185 Dundas W. 416-533-6667.

Relish Bar & Grill 2152 Danforth. 416-425-4664.

Reposado 136 Ossington. 416-532-6474.

Revival 783 College. 416-535-7888.

The Rex 194 Queen W. 416-598-2475.

Rivoli 332 Queen W. 416-596-1908.

Rooster Coffee House 343 King E. 416-995-1530.

Rose & Crown 2335 Yonge. 416-487-7673.

Roy Thomson Hall 60 Simcoe. 416-872-4255.

Saving Gigi 859 Bloor W. Seven44 744 Mt Pleasant. 416-489-7931.

Silver Dollar 486 Spadina. 416-975-0909.

The Sister 1554 Queen W. 416-532-2570.

Six Degrees 2335 Yonge. 416-486-9666.

Sneaky Dee’s 431 College. 416-603-3090.

Sotto Voce Wine Bar 595 College. 416-536-4564.

Sound Academy 11 Polson. 416-461-3625.

Southside Johnny’s 3653 Lake Shore W. 416-521-6302.

St James Catholic Church 728 Annette. 416-767-6451.

St Matthews Cathedral 875 Queen E. 416-465-2880.

The Steady Cafe & Bar 1051 Bloor W. 416-536-4162.

Switch Toronto 55 Colborne. 416-901-9990.

Thompson Hotel 550 Wellington W. 416-640-7778.

Toby’s Famous 411 College. 416-868-6297.

Tranzac 292 Brunswick. 416-923-8137.

Troika Vodka Boutique 95 King E. Virgin Mobile Mod Club 722 College. 416-588-4663.

WAYLA Bar 996 Queen E. 416-901-5570.

Wild Indigo Martini Bar 607 College. 416-536-8797.

Winchester Kitchen & Bar 51A Winchester. 416-323-0051.

Wise Guys 2301 Danforth. 416-694-2005.

Wrongbar 1279 Queen W. 416-516-8677.

album reviews

and Stockholm’s Avatarium are one of its newest exports. They play progressive pop doom that soars out of the murk thanks to Jennie-Ann Smith’s inspired vocals. Throughout the lengthy seven songs, she channels Ronnie James Dio, Robert Plant and, when she goes bluesy, Adele.

Unfortunately, she has to sing bandleader Leif Edling’s lyrics about forests where lovers commit suicide (Boneflower), girls trapped by wizards (Lady In The Lamp) and a man sending out telepathic waves through an iron helmet to fight a war in a parallel universe. But if she minds, you can’t tell.

She’s fully committed. And at times, the lines are effectively poetic.

The band has been together for less than a year, but Edling is far from a newcomer. As the bassist for influential on-and-off-again doom metallers Candlemass, he’s been around the block for over three decades. Avatarium are a slicker beast finding ways to breathe new life into doom.

Top track: Boneflower CARLA GILLIS

album of the week NNNN ñBEYONCÉ

(Columbia/Sony) Rating:

Beyoncé one-upped the music world last week by proving that you can not only keep an entire album’s existence secret (let alone its content), but you can also make 17 videos for it while gallivanting around the world on tour. And while there isn’t a chart-smashing Single Ladies or Baby Boy in the mix, the 14 tracks (plus 17 videos) make it her most satisfying album.

In a lot of ways, Beyoncé is an R&B traditionalist. That explains why, for example, her last album, 2011’s 4, could have an aggro dance hit like Run The World (Girls) and also a throwback soul tune like Love On Top. Here, the old-and-new pattern continues. The singer incorporates elements of 2013 (electronic alt-R&B with of-the-moment producers Pharrell Williams and Hit-Boy) while remaining unapologetically, earnestly, rahrah-rah Beyoncé (see XO).

That’s what separates her from the hardedged raunch of her peers, but it doesn’t mean she can’t do scandalous. In fact, she’s picked up her sex game big time, working it best on Rocket – a cross between late 90s

Funk/R&B PURPLE SNOW: FORECASTING THE ñ MINNEAPOLIS SOUND

(Numero Group) Rating: NNNN On its 50th release, reissue label Numero Group is dipping into the pure waters of Lake Minnetonka.

For Purple Snow, the label has unearthed overlooked and rare tracks from the Minneapolis soul, R&B and electrofunk scene of the late 70s and early 80s.

(Top 40 listeners would know its supertight, synth-led sound from Prince’s Purple Rain and Janet Jackson’s Control, produced by the Time’s Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis.)

Although the compilation and accompanying 30,000-word book give deeper context to Prince’s music, the Purple One is peripheral here, contributing guitar to 94 East’s If You See Me and the Lewis Connection’s Got To Be Something Here.

The 30 songs follow the scene’s progression: the first half is classically minded R&B and soul that evolves on disc 2 into danceable funk, with Alexander O’Neal’s new wavey Do You Dare and Ronny Robbins’s electro-rap track Contagious.

Top track: You’re All I Need, by Michael A. Dixon and J.O.Y. KEVIN RITCHIE

Electronic NEIGHBOURHOOD WATCH 1 (Neighbourhood Watch) Rating: NNN This is the first compilation from Neighbourhood Watch, a loose Toronto collective of electronic music producers who’ve been pooling the proceeds from their monthly pwyc parties to fund releases. Like the parties themselves, the four-song EP isn’t based on any particular genre or trend and walks the line between accessible and experimental; it’s more a sampling of different flavours than a cohesive statement.

Waterwalker (aka Nacho Lovers’ Bruce Trail and Jokers of the Scene’s Anti Hero) kick off with DRMT, which makes great use of shimmering synthesizer organ chords and a classic Detroit techno mood. Anti Hero’s Free Radicals also has a Motor City vibe, and shifts from sunny pads to an ominous bass line. The flowing half-time broken beat of Mike Din’s Dropping It All should appeal to Ma-

D’Angelo neo-soul and early 2000s Usher – and Partition, where she narrates backseat shenanigans over deep, resounding bass. (As if we didn’t spend enough time thinking about Bey and Jay’s sex life.)

The future-R&B vibe continues throughout, but there are nostalgic moments, too; on 70s-disco-inspired Blow, she manages a Janet Jackson delivery over a Michael Jackson beat.

And while Pretty Hurts, a Halo-sounding song about the pressure to be beautiful, will attract haters of sugary power anthems, the tune showcases classic Beyoncé feminism and will appeal to fans of girl power hits like Irreplaceable. (See also Flawless, featuring wise words from feminist Nigerian author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.)

Everywhere, Beyoncé’s buttery vocals are perfect, whether she’s growling on Drunk In Love (a follow-up to Crazy In Love and featuring Jay Z), unleashed on a ballad (Heaven), restrained on a Noah “40” Shebib-produced duet with Drake (Mine) or rapping an alt-hiphop intro on Haunted.

Well played.

Top track: Rocket JULIA LECONTE

chinedrum fans. The EP closes with Vlsonn’s Dodecad, a murky groove of clattering percussion, pitched-down vocals and jazzy chords.

Top track: DRMT, by Waterwalker Neighbourhood Watch hold an EP release party tonight (Thursday, December 19) at Parts & Labour.

BENJAMIN BOLES

Country

SLAVE ñ12 YEARS ANNNN

Snoddy sounds best when he abandons that forlorn western persona and instead takes on a more sprightly outlook. The album’s strongest track, Going Home, features handclaps, the odd yelp, banjos punctuated by a shimmering tambourine, and fast-paced delivery; it sounds like he’s performing on a front porch in the Deep South.

Top track: Going Home SAMANTHA EDWARDS

Experimental

ALAN SNODDY Shot Of Rhythm (independent) Rating: NNN After cutting his teeth as a guitarist for Stars, Alan Snoddy has branched out as a solo country crooner on his debut EP. Rather than the moody guitar rock of his former band, he opts for twangy ballads and Americana jams, plucky guitar chords and harmonica solos.

He gets vocal help from Canadian altcountry darling Serena Ryder on the title track. They sing about the genre’s typical fare: chasing dreams and chasing girls on America’s long, monotonous highways.

It’s sweet, if just a touch predictable.

BEARD CLOSET/PRIMATE PYRAMID (Arachnidiscs)

Rating: NNN Arachnidiscs is a small Canadian label specializing in “music for and by weirdos.” In this case, that takes the form of a split cassette (in a fur-covered case, because, of course) by solo experimental improv guitarists Beard Closet and Primate Pyramid.

And as you’ve probably already guessed, this isn’t the kind of music you’ll find yourself humming in the shower, even if you are a fan. It’s ambient music that is the

opposite of soothing.

Side A is one long piece by Beard Closet, which moves from soft-pulsing chiming sounds into dissonant shards of distortion and screeching ring modulation before a more peaceful (but still heavily distorted and processed) resolution. Primate Pyramid’s side of the tape is two pieces and features similar extreme guitar processing but a different approach to playing technique and composition.

Arc With No Story is all about subtle textures and ominous atmosphere, while Health Collapse is a slowly shifting wall of noise and feedback.

Top track: The Erosion Of Empathy, by Beard Closet Beard Closet/Primate Pyramid play at the Tranzac tonight (Thursday, December 19).

BB

Metal AVATARIUM (Nuclear Blast)

Rating: NNN Sweden has long been a metal hotbed,

(Columbia) Rating: Music plays an integral role in 12 Years A Slave, Steve McQueen’s magnificent film about a free black violinist who’s sold into slavery in 1841.

Its soundtrack, executive-produced

by R&B singer John Legend, captures the film’s tragic beauty while homing in on its few joyous moments.

The 16 tracks are anchored by spirituals. The strongest (and the film’s most memorable) is Roll Jordan Roll.

Legend delivers an effective a cappella version near the album’s start, while Topsy Chapman and the film’s cast (Chiwetel Ejiofor included), belt a powerful one near the end.

Additions by blues guitar virtuoso Gary Clark Jr. evoke a Louisiana sunset and sound like they could have been recorded decades ago. The glue that holds it together is Hans Zimmer’s string-heavy score: Solomon envelops with unsettling cello before Laura Mvula lifts the gloom with Little Girl Blue, a wistful Rodgers & Hart ditty interspersed with the melody for Good King Wenceslas.

Top track: Little Girl Blue JL

#7 the weeknd// trilogy imaaji Perform echoes of silence

presented by

= Critics’ Pick NNNNN = Perfect NNNN = Great NNN = Good NN = Bad N = Horrible

Ñ

Soundtrack

New 50:50 cover every Friday at nowtoronto.com/5050 NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

53

NEW YEAR’S EVE GUIDE

NIC POULIOT

PARTY ON INTO 2014 AT THESE YEAR-END EVENTS Compiled by JULIA HOECKE

5 indicates queer-friendly events

Parties

ALLEYCATZ New Year’s Eve 2014. Festive dinner, Lady Kane performs live and DJ Mike spins funk, soul, R&B disco, reggae, top 40 and more. Cocktails from 6 pm, dinner 7 pm, bubbly and favours at midnight. Dinner and dance $75, party only from 8:30 pm $30. 2409 Yonge. 416-481-6865, alleycatz.ca.

AMSTERDAM BREWHOUSE New Year’s Eve Party. LMT Connection play funk and soul from 9 pm. Craft brews and dinner options. $50. 245 Queens Quay W. 416-5041020, amsterdambrewhouse.com. & CO RESTO BAR Casino Royale. Dine and celebrate at this gala with an ode to 1920s Monaco. Music by DJ Blind Method, DJ Threats, DJ C-Los, Vendetta and others. Fourcourse menu, hors d’oeuvres, party favours and champagne toast. Dinner & party $90, party only $40. ticketpicket.com/casinoroyale. 295 Enfield Place (Mississauga). 905-8082112, andcompany.ca.

ANDY POOLHALL New Years Baby! DJs Brendan Canning, Justin Peroff, Sunclef, Ef-

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DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

sharp and Caff play everything. 9 pm. $20 (Soundscapes, Rotate This, Play de Record and at the venue). 489 College. 416-923-5300, andypoolhall.com.

ARIA COMPLEX Experience 2014 New Year’s Eve. Huge multi-floor dance party with all floors including Aria, Vanity, Haze and Pure. Adv $25, more later. 108 Peter. 647-2282434, ariacomplex.com.

THE BALLET Extravagance New Years 2014. Burlesque shows, midnight champagne toast, music by No Big Deal and surprise guests. Doors 10 pm. Semi-formal attire suggested. 21+. $25. 277A Ossington. balletossington.com.

THE BALLROOM New Year’s Eve. The Frank Ryan Band perform. $25 after 10:30 pm, adv $15 at the venue. 145 John. 416-5972695, theballroom.ca.

BAR 244 Rock:in NYE:14. Top 40, club anthems, party classics, rock, R&B and more.

Doors 9 pm. $20, increases closer to the event. 244 Adelaide W. 416-599-2442, bar244.ca.

BELLEENY’S LOUNGE New Year’s Eve. Steele, a jazzy cabaret and DJ XL provide the music for this dance party. Hors d’oeuvres and complimentary cocktail, three-course dinner.

Reserve. $95, $180 per couple. 4000 Steeles W, unit 14. belleenyslounge.com.

THE BEVERLEY HOTEL Celebrate 2014.

DJ dancing, five-course dinner, early threecourse dinner (6:30 pm), champagne toast and party favours. Dinner & party $100, early dinner, $65, party only after 11 pm $25. 335 Queen W. 416-493-2786, thebeverleyhotel.ca.

BLACK ANGUS STEAKHOUSE Ring-ADing-Ding. Contemporary crooner Andy De Campos performs at this classy dinner party.

Two seatings 6 & 9 pm. Reserve. Prix fixe $150 early seating, $175 late seating. 3277 Bloor W. 416-233-7406, blackangussteakhouse.ca.

BLUE SUEDE SUE’S Kiss 2013 Goodbye.

Party with live performance by Joée, party favours, noisemakers, hors d’oeuvres, champagne toast and more. Call for tickets. 75 Watline (Mississauga). 905-890-0690, bluesuedesues.ca.

BOVINE SEX CLUB New Year’s Eve. The Victim Party, Plan 37, Black Cat Attack and a guest band play. Midnight toast, favours and DJ dancing. 9 pm. $15, adv $10 (ticketscene. ca/events/9773). 542 Queen W. 416-5044239, bovinesexclub.com.

BRANT HOUSE 14 Minutes To Midnight.

Stylish affair for the over-21 set with dinner

reservations for 7, 8 & 9 pm seatings. Standard or premium VIP packages available.

R&B and old school music. Strict style code in effect. $22-$45 (uniqlifestyle. wantickets.com). 522 King W. branthouse.com.

BRASSAII Winter Wonderland Party. Dinner and dance party with DJ Annalyze.

Five-course dinner with three seatings (8, 8:30 & 9 pm). Dance only from 10 pm. Formal dress code and 25+ age restriction. Dinner and dance $160, dance only $50 (tinyurl.com/ brassaiinye2014). 461 King W. 416-536-6104, brassaii.com.

BUDDIES IN BAD TIMES THEATRE After Hours New Year’s Eve. Multidisciplinary performances by Tynomi Banks, Scarlett Bobo, Sapphire Titha Reign, music

DJ Deko-Ze performs at Fly’s Black & White Ball.

Hungaria_NOW_Layout.pdf

by DJs K-Tel and Triple X, host Cassandra Moore and others. Doors 10 pm. $25. 12 Alexander. 416-975-8555, buddiesinbadtimes. com. 5 Cabin Nightclub Prohibition New Year’s Eve. Celebrate 1920s-style with DJ Starski spinning old school, hip-hop and R&B. $25. 559 College. ­clubcrawlers.com.

Cadillac Lounge New Year’s Eve. The Mercanaries and KC & the Moonshine Band perform. 1296 Queen W. 416-536-7717, ­cadillaclounge.com.

Cameron House NYE Party. Ferraro and Shane Murphy play. 10 pm. 408 Queen W. 416-703-0811, thecameron.com.

Captain Matthew Flinders New Year’s Cruise. Cruise the harbour while dancing and enjoying hors d’oeuvres and food stations with host Rebecca Page of Z103.5.

Champagne midnight toast. Boarding 9 pm, dock at 1 am. $69.95. 207 Queens Quay W, Pier 6. 416-203-0178, mariposacruises.com.

Casa Loma Party At The Castle. Step back in time to a period of European elegance.

Complimentary champagne toast and music

by DJ Rouge. 10 pm. $75. 1 Austin Terrace.

416-923-1171, westofcontra.com/­buytickets.

Castlefield Event Theatre Prestige On Yonge NYE Affair. Upscale party with dinner and dancing. After-dinner show with Ray Robinson, S Davis and Trish, comedy by Dred Lee and music by Max B. Strict semi-formal dress code. Dinner and dance $75, dance only $35-$45, dinner, show & dance $85. 2492 Yonge. 416-322-3322, clubcrawlers.com.

Cinema Nightclub NYE 14 Show Time.

Casual upscale attire for the 21 and over crowd. House, hip-hop and club anthems. VIP packages offered. 9 pm. $45 (wantickets. com). 135 Liberty. 416-588-2888, C ­cinemapresents.ca.

Clinton’s NYE 14. Bangs & Blush spin 50s, M 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s and 00s at this party. Doors 9:30 pm. $20 at the door. 693 Bloor W. 416Y 535-9541, clintons.ca.

Club V Masquerade New Years. DJ Milz CM plays top 40, hip-hop, house and more. Champagne toast, masquerade masks and indoor/ MY outdoor smoking patio. $40. 88 Yorkville. 647448-6453, privenightlife.com.

CY Cobra Lounge Virtue. House, hip-hop and club anthems at this upscale dance party CMY in a subterranean tomb-like setting with light show and LED Color Kinetics ceiling. 9 pm. K $25. 510 King W. 416-361-9004, uniqlifestyle. com/nye14.

Cove ThirtyOne NYE 2014. Two-floor dance with top 40, hip-hop and mashups.

Complimentary party favours and midnight bubbly. Doors 9 pm. $25. 31 Mercer. 416-9790131, clubcrawlers.com.

Crocodile Rock New Years Eve. Party favours, balloon drop, ice luge for shots, top 40, retro and dance. $20, adv $15. 240 Adelaide W. 416-599-9751, crocrock.ca.

Cube Social NYE. DJ Jed Harper and DJ Tudor help ring in 2014. Midnight toast and favours included. Doors 9 pm. Dress code in effect. Advance from $35. 314 Queen W. 416263-0330, cubetoronto.com.

Dakota Tavern New Year’s Eve With The Royal Crowns. Rockabilly party. Doors 9 pm. $20 (ticketfly.com). 249 Ossington. 416850-4579, thedakotatavern.com.

Dovercourt House New Year’s Eve Swing & Blues Double Deck Ball. The Happy Pals Swing Quintet play this party with a hot or cold supper buffet, favours, midnight bubbly and dance classes. Beginner classes before the ball with lindy hop on one floor, blues dancing on the other, 8 to 9 pm. Ball from 9:15 pm. $45 with a class, $40 without. 805 Dovercourt. 416-535-3847, odd-socks.org.

Drake Hotel Black & White Ball. Dinner, dancing with DJ Conor Cutz, party favours and more. Three-course dinner (6 to 7 pm) $75, four-course dinner (9 to 10 pm), $115, strolling cabaret dinner $75, general admission $40, after midnight $20. 1150 Queen W. 416-531-5042, thedrakehotel.ca.

Drake One Fifty Day To Night. Après work cocktails and canapés (3 to 6 pm), dinner, countdown gathering, Into The Night (9 pm) package and more at the Drake’s downtown venue. Cocktails $25-$40, dining room $40-$75, Into The Night $75-$150. 150 York.

416-363-6150, drakeonefifty.ca.

The Everleigh Circa 1926. DJ Spence Diamonds spins classics, hip-hop, old skool and current hits at this stylish party with a nostalgic theme. Party favours and midnight champagne toast included. Adv $40, more at

1

the door. 580 King W. 416-368-0014, ticketzone.com/everleigh.

F-Stop Nightclub Hip-hop party by DJ North Prep. 10 pm. 420A Wellington W. 416901-9990, f-stoptoronto.com.

Fairmont Royal York Hotel Majestic New Year’s Eve 2014. Three-course dinner and dance offered with music by Hrant, DJ Delirious, Vicar DJ Grandslam Boodram, DJ DR & Julian Tulino spinning top 40, mashups, house, R&B and hip-hop. Live music performances, comedy by Ali Badshah and cabaret show by Laura Furtado. Doors 6:30 pm, dance 9 pm. Dinner and dance $100, dance only $40.

100 Front W. 416-368-2511, majesticnye.com.

Fiction Nightclub Stories To Tell NYE. Dance to top 40 and house at this stylish party. $25 (clubcrawlers.com). 180 Pearl.

Fly Black & White Ball. DJs Deko-Ze and Kevin Bailey, party favours, champagne toast and hot go-go guys. Black and/or white attire suggested. Doors 9 pm. $35, $30 adv (available at Fly, Rotate This, Out On The Street, 551 Church and The 8th Deadly Sin Restaurant, 6 Gloucester). 8 Gloucester. 416-410-5426, ­flynightclub.com.5 The Garrison Chronologic New Year’s Eve. Music from 1890 to 2014 played in chronological order with Goin’ Steady DJs and DJ Wes Allen in the Cantina. Doors 10 pm. $25, adv $20 (ticketswell.com, Rotate This, Soundscapes). 1197 Dundas W. 416-5199439, ­garrisontoronto.com.

Gate 403 Denielle Bassels Jazz Band. 8 pm. 403 Roncesvalles. 416-588-2930, ­gate403.com.

Gate 403 Jazz Party. Denielle Bassels’ Quintet performs. 8 pm. $10 cover. 403 Roncesvalles. 416-588-2930, gate403.com.

Gladstone Hotel Big Top Party. Jugglers, acrobats, bearded ladies, DJs, carnival games, complimentary toast, cotton candy, bigitop midnight ballroom drop and more.

Dancing with DJs MAKEM, Wolfh34rt and Dirty Dale. Themed VIP rooms with private or ring-side spaces. Adv $40-$50, $60 at the door. 1214 Queen W. 416-531-4635, ­gladstonehotel.com.

Gravity Soundbar Gravity New Year’s Eve. Two floors, three rooms and three sounds. Semi-formal dress code.

Doors 9 pm. Early bird $25 (clubcrawlers. com). 296 Richmond W. gravitysoundbar. com.

Gravity Soundbar Great Canadian Pub Crawl Party. Party at three clubs in one night. Begin at Gravity Soundbar, then visit Crocodile Rock and move on to Tequila Jacks. Pick up your ticket by 10 pm at starting venue. Semi-formal dress. $40 bracelet. 296 Richmond W. 416977-8900, ­clubcrawlers.com.

2013-12-06

4:47 PM

Grossman’s New Year’s Eve. Caution Jam play this festive party. 379 Spadina. ­grossmanstavern.com.

Guvernment/Kool Haus Magic.

W&W, Rebecca & Fiona, Ben Gold, Mark Oliver, Manzone & Strong. Party favours, champagne and a morning snack. Doors 9 pm, party till 9 am. $35 and up (inktickets.com).

132 Queens Quay E. theguvernment.com.

Habits Gastropub New Year’s Eve Dance Party. DJ TheVinylDen spins. $tba. 928 College. 416-533-7272, habitsgastropub.com.

Hard Rock Cafe Hungama. Bollywood and bhangra party with DJ Guru & DJ Alfa and a dhol performance by J Raj. Doors 9:30 pm.

Style code in effect. $30, prices rises closer to date, more at the door. 279 Yonge. 416-3623636, simplygaurav.com.

Horseshoe NYE Show. The Sadies perform two sets, 11:15 pm & 1:15 am. Doors 8:30 pm. $25 (Horseshoe, Rotate This, Soundscapes, Ticketfly). 370 Queen W. 416-5984753, horseshoetavern.com.

House of Moments NYE14 With Pleasurekraft & Damn Kids. Groove-heavy underground techno music at this dance party. Opening set by Sam Haze. 9 pm. $56.50 (­thisisprovoke.com). 386 Carlaw. 416-9016003, houseofmoments.com.

Hugh’s Room New Year’s Eve. Jane Bunnett & the Spirits Of Havana with guest Hilario Duran perform. 9:30 pm. $50, adv $45. 2261 Dundas W. 416-531-6604, hughsroom.com.

International Plaza Hotel

Glamour And Glitz NYE Gala. Two ballrooms with over 20 DJs spinning top 40, R&B, reggae, soca, hip-hop, house and more. Dinner, dancing, party favours, midnight snack, balloon drop and more. Semi-formal to formal dress.

7 pm. Dinner and dance $65, dance only $40.

655 Dixon. 416-898-3535, ticketgateway.com.

The Jazz Bistro New Year’s Party. Fivecourse meal, cocktail piano, doors 7:30 pm.

The Soul Nannies perform R&B, soul and funk from 9 pm. Dinner, party favours and a glass of champagne at midnight. $300 per couple, reserve. 251 Victoria. 416-363-5299, jazzbistro.ca.

KITCH South Beach Party. Strip off your heavy winter wear for a beach party with DJ NaNa. $30-$40. 229 Geary. 647-350-4555, kitchbar.com.

La Maquette Gala Dinner And Dance.

Five-course gourmet dinner, dancing with Jerry Aaron till 3 am, party favours and celebratory champagne toast. $110. 111 King E. 416-366-8191, lamaquette.com.

Lake Affect Lounge New Year’s Eve. The Pie Guys and Joe Reynolds perform. 1 Port E (Mississauga). 905-274-8223, lakeaffect.com.

Latinada Latin New Year’s Eve. Live Latin music and dancing, hot buffet with wine and a midnight champagne toast. Doors 8 pm, party 9 pm. $75. 1671 Bloor W. 416-913-9716, latinada.com.

Lee’s Palace New Year’s Eve Party.

Roots/alt-country party with folk rockers Elliott Brood, opening act Harlan Pepper. Doors 8 pm, show 9 pm. Adv $22.50 (Ticketfly, Rotate This, Soundscapes). 529 Bloor W. 416532-1598, leespalace.com.

Liberty Grand Together New Year’s Eve. Huge three-room party with DJs Michael Woods, Quintino, Mark Knight, Funkagenda, 4Korners and others. Doors 10 pm. Tickets from $50 (uniqlifestyle.wantickets.com). 25 British Columbia. 416-642-3789, togethernye.com.

Lola New Year’s Eve Bash. Chris Lord performs. 40 Kensington. 416-348-8645, ­lolamartinis.com.

London Tap House New Year’s Eve Streetcar Party. Visit several venues to dance and party the night away with bus service from club to club. Pizza & appetizers, party favours, prizes, midnight champagne, priority entrance to all clubs and more. 7:30 pm to 2 am. $50-$60 (tin.info/member/SCP/ event/1854260), tickets invalid after 8:30 pm.

250 Adelaide W. 416-205-1234, facebook. com/streetcarparty.

Lou Dawg’s No Hassele New Year’s Party. DJ Kenny Bounce spinning funk, soul and hip-hop. Food, drinks and 3 am last call.

589 King W. 647-347-3294, loudawgs.com.

continued on page 56 œ

R

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The Toronto Star

NOW December 19-25 2013

55

NEW YEAR’S EVE GUIDE dubstep. Vintage dress code. Doors 9 pm. $30 (Soundscapes, Rotate This, Fairies Pyjamas).

783 College. 416-535-7888, thebootleggersball.eventbrite.ca.

THE REX Funky R&B New Year’s Bash. Live music by Grooveyard . Doors 8:30 pm. $70 before Dec 23, $75 after. 194 Queen W. 416598-2475, therex.ca.

RICHMOND HILL CENTRE FOR THE

œcontinued from page 55

LULA LOUNGE Salsa New Year’s Eve. Ro-

berto Linares Brown Orchestra, Baila Boogaloo and DJ Gio perform at this dance party. Fivecourse dinner, salsa lesson and champagne toast. Dinner & show $150, dancing only $40.

1585 Dundas W. 416-588-0307, lula.ca.

LUXY NIGHTCLUB Shine NYE. Dance to top 40, hip-hop, R&B, reggae and more at this large venue. $20. 60 Interchange Way (Vaughan). clubcrawlers.com.

MAISON MERCER Enchanté New Years Eve. Music by DJ Aadil playing house, high energy, hip-hop and hits. Tickets include gourmet hors d’oeuvres and midnight champagne toast. $30, 40 later and more at the door (ticketzone.com/maisonmercer). 15 Mercer. 416-341-8777, maisonmercer.com.

MARIPOSA CRUISE LINES Gala Dinner Cruise. Board the Northern Spirit for an evening of fine dining, dancing, spectacular views and midnight bubbly. Boarding 8 pm, return 1 am. $119.95. 207 Queens Quay W. 416-2030178, mariposacruises.com.

MIRAGE CONVENTION CENTRE Stars New Years. Caribbean New Year’s Eve all-inclusive event with DJs playing soca, reggae, chutney, top 40, old school and more. Complimentary buffet from 9 to 10 pm, party hats, horns, Vegas stage dancers and midnight champagne toast. $60-$100. 1917 Albion.

416-319-2727, torontolime.com.

MONARCH TAVERN Blue Note New Year’s Eve. Brownman Electryc Trio play funkified jazz classics. Doors 8 pm. $25, couple $40 till Dec 22, more later. 12 Clinton. 416-531-5833, yxprojekts.com.

MONARCHS PUB NYE Celebration. Jack de Keyzer Band and Jerome Godboo play the blues for this affair.

33 Gerrard W. monarchspub.ca.

NYOOD Glam NYE 2014. Glamorous party with music by Madjellan. Semiformal attire. Doors 10 pm, 21+.

Adv $25, more later. 1096 Queen W. 416-466-1888, glamnye.ca.

ODDVILLE HQ New Year’s Eve Cabaret Variety Show. Will Gillespie hosts a cabaret with Anna Atkinson, burlesque by Miss Mitzy Cream and Venus, belly dance by Raziya, prizes, topless tarot readings and more. Doors 8 pm, show 10 pm. $25, adv $18. 2094 A Dundas W. newyearsevecabaretvariety.eventbrite.com.

OLD MILL INN HOME SMITH BAR Jazz Party. Heather Bambrick and Her All-Star Jazz Trio perform. Complimentary champagne on arrival, buffet dinner from 7:30 pm, music from 8:30 pm, desserts at 11 pm. Overnight packages offered. $125, reserve. 21 Old Mill Rd. 416-207-2020, oldmilltoronto.com.

OPERA HOUSE New Year’s Party. Toronto’s Balkan Klezmer Gypsy party punk super band the Lemon Bucket Orkestra celebrates along with rustic folk outfit Koljadnyky and Samba Elegua. Bring an old hat to exchange with a stranger at midnight. Doors 9 pm. $30, adv $20 (La Pallette, 492 Queen W, Sunrise Records Yonge/Dundas or online). 735 Queen E. lemonbucketNYE.brownpapertickets.com.

THE OSSINGTON Dance Party Bash. DJ Big Jimmy Mills spins. Hors d’oeuvres and champagne toast included. 9 pm. Adv $20. 61 Ossington. 416-850-0161, theossington.com.

THE PAINTED LADY Soul Sonic Bash. DJ NV and Ruby Magnitude’s Bartop Burlesque at this party. 10 pm. No cover.

218 Ossington. thepaintedlady.ca.

PALAIS ROYALE DJs Dwayne Gretzky and Lazy Ray spin for this dance party. 9 pm. Adv $35 (ticketfly.com, Rotate This, Soundscapes).

1601 Lake Shore W. palaisroyale.ca.

THE PISTON Eve Me Up Disco New Year’s Eve. Music by DJs A Digital Needle, Cyclist and Alister Johnston, midnight champagne toast and party favours. $15. 937 Bloor W. 416-5323989, thepiston.ca.

POUR GIRL New Year’s Eve. Special drink and entrees 4 to 10 pm ($10). Reserve. DJ party upstairs. No cover. 191 College. 416916-6448, pourgirl.ca.

PRODUCT NIGHTCLUB 1920s-Themed Party. DJ Wikked and DJ Lokei and guest hosts from the Indiana Pacers. Doors 10 pm.Strict dress code. $40 (info@ladyluckent.net). 364 Richmond W. productnightclub.com.

REPOSADO Every 1’s A Winner. DJ Gord C spins 70s funk & R&B. Complimentary party favours and midnight bubbly. Pwyc. 136 Ossington. reposadobar.com.

REVIVAL The Bootlegger’s Ball.

New Year’s Eve Speakeasy with Les Coquettes and Electro Swing Club T.O. DJs, live music, interactive visuals, vintage cocktails, a fashion contest, burlesque, sexy peep show. Electro Swing fuse traditional swing with electro house, drum n’ bass, hip-hop, and

SOUND ACADEMY SOLARIUM

Cirque New Year’s. Venue with a view of the skyline features dancing to house, hip-hop, mashups, top 40 and club anthems by DJ Nishe & DJ Nakz. Balloon drop, confetti cannons and party favours.

Doors 10 pm. Strict style code. $20 (ticketzone.com). 11 Polson.

647-986-3866, cirquenye.com.

SPIN TORONTO Neon New Year’s Eve. Ping pong social club neon party with an electro-industrial spectacle performance by Squid Lid, DJ sets by Sir Rock Obama and Deadly Vanity. Play ping pong, dance, drink and eat. Wear neons or white, $5 black

Jason DeRosse gets laughs at the Comedy Bar.

The Royal Crowns at Dakota Tavern The Royal Crowns rule at the Dakota Tavern.

56

DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

SUSAN KING

See Jeff Bridges (left), Steve Buscemi and John Goodman in The Big Lebowski, screening at Bloor Hot Docs Cinema.

PERFORMING ARTS Big Band New Year’s. The Galaxy Orchestra with Alex Pangman and Don Thompson recreate Benny Goodman’s legendary 1938 Carnegie Hall concert at this swing party. 9:30 pm. $63.75$75. 10268 Yonge. 905-787-8811, rhcentre.ca.

RIVOLI Bump N’ Hustle, Garage 416 and Footprints Party. DJs Paul E Lopes, Mike Tull, Blueprint, Moreno, Jason Palma, General Eclectic and Stuart Li spin soulful vibes, house, reggae, hip-hop and more on both floors.

Doors 10 pm. Adv $25 at (Play de Record 357 Yonge, Cosmos 607A Queen W, Eventbrite and at the venue); $30 at the door. 332 Queen W. 416-596-1908, rivoli.ca.

ROCK ‘N HORSE SALOON Country Hoedown New Year’s Eve. Mechanical bull riding, live music, country DJs, and cowboy party favours. Doors 9 pm. $39 (northerntickets.com).

250 Adelaide W. rocknhorsesaloon.com.

SHERATON CENTRE Grand Gala 2014.

Huge ballroom dance with DJs playing top 40, hip-hop, R&B and mashups. Three-course dinner from 7 pm, or party only from 9 pm. Dinner and dance $100, dance $60. 123 Queen W. 416-361-1000, newyearsgrandgala.com.

SILVER DOLLAR New Year’s Eve Dance Party. Bloodshot Bill , Stella Ella Ola, Brews Willis, DJs Sianteuse & Johnny Rankin rock this event. Doors 9 pm. $10 (Rotate This, Soundscapes, Ticketfly). 486 Spadina. 416975-0909, silverdollarroom.com.

SIX DEGREES Back In The Day. 90s NYE dance party with DJ Mensa & DJ R2 and a tribute to old school hip-hop, R&B, dance, house, reggae and 90s pop. Party favours, balloon drop and confetti canons. Doors 10 pm, 21+. $25. 2335 Yonge. 416-486-9666, clubcrawlers. com.

SOUND ACADEMY Genesis NYE: The Start Of Something New. Huge party at this venue with Madjellan, Reno Bravo, Fredzone, Andy Cue, Profit, Noel Wynter, Syktripp, Rick Logic, Patric Braganca, C-Kutz and percussion

by Sahab Habibi. Doors 10 pm. $20. 11 Polson.

416-461-3625, genesisnewyearseve.com.

light T&Ts. Reserve tables in advance. Doors 8 pm. No cover. 461 King W. 416-599-7746, toronto.spingalactic.com.

THE STEADY CAFE & BAR Go Hard Swagg 2 Da Roof NYE Past And Present. DJs Blackcat and Pleasure keep you moving all night. 10 pm to late. $15. 1051 Bloor W. 416536-4162, thesteadycafe.com.

STORYS BUILDING Singles New Year’s Eve Party. Meet Market Adventures, Stir Events and Toronto’s Hottest Singles party. DJ dancing, hors d’oeuvres, live shows, party favours, midnight toast, prizes and more. Dress to impress. 9:30 pm. $120. 11 Duncan. 1-800544-1061, meetmarketadventures.com.

STOUT IRISH PUB New Year’s Eve. Champagne toast, party favours and hors d’oeuvres at this fete. 8 pm. $10. 221 Carlton. 647-3447676, stoutirishpub.ca.

THE STRATHCONA HOTEL New Year’s Eve.. The Tony Cutrone Band play top 40, dance, pop and rock. $75, reserve. 60 York.

1-800-268-8304, strathconahotel.com.

SUPERMARKET Do Right & 92BPM Party Party.

DJs John Kong, Sean Sax and mymanhenri spinning soul, funk, Motown, hip-hop, future beats and the best of 2013. Doors 9:30 pm. $20, adv $15 (Eventbrite.com, Soundscapes and the venue). 268 Augusta. 416-840-0501, supermarketnye.com.

TATTOO ROCK PARLOUR Tattoo Rocks.

DJ Human Kebab, DJ Trevor and DJ Stu play the best of rock and party rock anthems.

Doors 10 pm. $25. 567 Queen W. 416-7035488, clubcrawlers.com.

THOMPSON HOTEL 1812 BAR NYE 14.

Three rooms, three DJs, one party w/ DJs Geoff Brown, Soundbwoy, Eric the Tutor and Mike Toast play this upscale dance party with house, hip-hop and club anthems. Doors at 10 pm. Early bird $40, $60. 550 Wellington W.

416-828-2425, ticketpicket.com/ thompsonnye14.

TIME NIGHTCLUB Black & White Masquerade Ball. DJs Starting from Scratch, Nigel Ong, DJ Sin, DJ Carlos play hip-hop, top 40, R&B and house for the over-23 crowd. Champagne toast and favours included. Black and white dress code. 81 Peter. 416-581-1118, clubcrawlers.com.

TOIKA Bring The Beats. DJs Ricky Ryan, Cesar Caballero and Craig Anderson spin underground deep house. Semi-formal. 9 pm. 471 Richmond W. 416-868-6452, toikalounge.com.

TOULA Great Gatsby New Year’s Eve Gala.

Elegant six-course dinner and dancing to music by DJ Dylan. Early New Year’s Eve dinner 5 to 7 pm, all night New Year’s Eve celebration from 7:30 pm, or party only from 10:30 pm. Reservations recommended. Early dinner $80, party only $60, all night celebration $150. 1 Harbour Square, 38th floor. 416777-2002, toularestaurant.com.

TRANZAC Concert Party Party. Three rooms of entertainment including Hooded Fang, Weaves, Maloo, the True Visitor Band, Sing Leaf, Blimp Rock, the Woodshed Orchestra, Kashka, John Southworth, DJ Gavin and more.

Complimentary champagne at midnight. $17, adv $15 (Rotate This, Soundscapes and the venue). 292 Brunswick. tranzac.org.

TRUMP HOTEL

The Twelfth Hour Hour.

Elegant party with music and dancing in the two-storey ball-

room. DJ M-Rock spins old school, hip-hop and R&B. Decadent hors d’oeuvres, champagne toast and desserts. $90. 325 Bay. 416306-5800, twelfthhournye.com.

TRYST Pop Champagne. Trendy party with dancing to top 40, hip-hop and mashups. $25.

82 Peter. 416-588-7978, clubcrawlers.com.

UNIUN Unite 2014. Celebrate with DJ Jed Dadson and DJ Chris La Roque. Complimentary champagne toast and party favours.

Doors 9 pm. Dress code in effect. Advance from $35. 473 Adelaide W. 416-603-9300, uniqlifestyle.com/nye14.

VIRGIN MOBILE MOD CLUB Genesis.

Dancing to music by DJs Arnej, Bryan Kearney, Mike, Sied van Riel and Shelley. Doors 9 pm. $25-$40 (wantickets.com). 722 College. 416668-8070, themodclub.com.

VOGUE SUPPER CLUB Liberty New Years. Times Square New York-themed decor with music by DJ Tilt & ISC Nation. Champagne toast and hors d’oeuvres. Strict style code. Doors 10 pm. $25. 42 Mowat. voguesupperclub.com.

WAYLA BAR Y2K Party Party. Party Like It’s 1999 with DJ Mark Falco spinning 90s house, pop, hip-hop and a midnight show by Scarlett Bobo. Midnight champagne, favours and surprises. Doors 10 pm. $15, adv $10 (from the venue). 996 Queen E. 416-901-5570, waylabar.com.

WOODY’S Big Ass New Year’s Eve. DJ Chris Steinbach, butch beats and tons of dance space. No cover. 467 Church.

416-972-0887, woodystoronto.com.

All Ages LIBERTY MARKET BLDG

Midnite Run and Party New Year’s Eve. Run or walk 5K at the stroke of midnight and celebrate with a post-race party. Chip-timed race, hot food, fireworks, swag bags and free glass of bubbly at the finish. $45-$95, prices go up closer to the date, party only/run and party tickets offered.

171 East Liberty. 416707-5944, midniteruntoronto. com.

painting on a community mural. 7 to 9 pm.

Free. 300 City Centre. 905-615-4311, mississauga.artscouncil.com.

NATHAN PHILLIPS SQUARE Citytv New Year’s Eve. Fathead, God Made Me Funky and DJ Clymaxx provide the music for this allages outdoor concert. 8 pm to midnight. Skating, fireworks, street food for family fun. Free.

100 Queen W. toronto.ca.

TORONTO ZOO Family New Year’s Eve Countdown. Outdoor event with entertainment from the Decades and Majinx Magic Show.

Wild animal visitors at the Giant Panda Experience, Tundra Trek and Australasia Pavilion.

Opens at 5 pm, kids’ countdown at 8 pm. $20, child (3-12) $12, 2 and under free. Meadowvale N of 401. 416-392-5929, torontozoo.com.

Comedy BLOOR HOT DOCS CINEMA The Dude’s New Year’s. Screening of The Big Lebowski.

Wearing a bathrobe and sunglasses encouraged. White Russian express bar available. 9 pm. $20, adv $17. Tickets include screening, one drink, popcorn and party favors. Tickets available at box office or online. 506 Bloor W. 416-516-2330, bloorcinema.com.

COMEDY BAR The Superstars Of Comedy And Mantown. Rob Bebenek hosts The Superstars Of Comedy evening with headliner Ben Miner, Jamie O’Connor and Pat MacDonald. 8 pm ($15, adv $12). Mantown improv comedy with Adam Cawley, Bob Banks, Rob Norman, Rob Baker and Jason DeRosse. 10:30 pm ($10).

945 Bloor W. 416-551-6540, comedybar.ca.

THE FLYING BEAVER PUBARET Because I Said So: The Year In Revile. Comedy by Maggie Cassella, dinner and dance party. 8 pm. $25 (brownpapertickets.com). 488 Parliament. 647-347-6567, pubaret.com.

YEARS

EVE at

HOT HOUSE CAFE The Land Of Smiles.

Toronto Operetta Theatre’s gala performance dinner and dance of Franz Lehar’s masterwork as part of the Viennese Silversterball tradition. Pre-performance reception, threecourse dinner prior to the show at the St Lawrence Centre (27 Front E), followed by dinner, dancing and midnight champagne. 6 pm. $198-$213. 35 Church. 416-366-7723, stlc.com.

ROY THOMSON HALL Bravissimo!

Opera’s Greatest Hits. The Opera Canada Symphony, Chorus Niagara, the Orpheus Choir of Toronto and soloists perform excerpts from La Traviata, Rigoletto, Aida and more. 7 to 9 pm. $55-$145. 60 Simcoe. 416872-4255, roythomson.com.

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Spiritual

ZEN BUDDHIST TEMPLE Kindling Light

Of Wisdom Mind. Special year-end candlelight service to take stock of your life and end the year in contemplation and reflection. All welcome. 8 to 10 pm. $10 donation. 86 Vaughan. 416-658-0137, zenbuddhisttemple.org. 3

over 2,000

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Countdown to midnight with performances by R&B, pop and hip-hop performers Martina and Massari. DJ Dopey and dance trio PRTY H3RO perform. Ice skating from 8 pm, show from 9:30 pm. Free. 300 City Centre. 905-615-4311, mississauga.ca.

NEW

Theatre

restaurants!

MISSISSAUGA CELEBRATION SQUARE New Year’s Eve.

Andy De Campos keeps it classy at Black Angus Steakhouse.

MASSEY HALL Comedy Extravaganza.

Jeremy Hotz hosts this hilarious party with comedians Jessica Kirson, Mike MacDonald, John Hastings, Graham Kay, Dave Merheje, Darcy Michael, Alex Pavone, Christina Walkinshaw, and music by Jaymz Bee and Bonzai Suzuki. 7:30 pm. $39.50-$69.50. 178 Victoria.

416-872-4255, masseyhall.com.

YUK YUK’S DOWNTOWN New Year’s Eve Special. Rob Pue, Michelle Shaughnessy, Darryl Orr and MC Bryan Hatt provide the laughs. Dinner 8 pm, show 10 pm. Dinner and show $95, show only $50. 224 Richmond W. 416-967-6425, yukyuks.com.

COUNTRY HOEDOWN

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Amazing Food!

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over 2,000 restaurants!

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Limelight. Association of Young Artists block party with an open mic with the Chris Strazz Band, and an interactive art performance and

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NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

57

stage

more online nowtoronto.com/stage Review of THE MUSICAL OF MUSICALS, THE MUSICAL! • Scenes on AGAINST THE GRAIN THEATRE’S MESSIAH, NEW SEASONS FROM CANADIAN STAGE AND HARBOURFRONT’S HATCH • and more

Fully searchable listings with venue maps nowtoronto.com/stage/listings Another GG finalist, Shakespeare’s Nigga is a rich riff on the Bard and some of his characters, with Aaron (from Titus Andronicus) and Othello as contrasted slaves in the service of Shakespeare, here a kind of Southern plantation owner. Things get complicated when Judith, Shakespeare’s daughter, gets involved with the revolutionary Aaron but is desired by the more cultured Othello.

Pierre’s language is strong, his imagery striking and his characters passionate; the result offers intriguing thoughts on cultural appropriation and the anger of the subjugated.

HOLIDAY GIFTS

Book these acts

By JON KAPLAN and GLENN SUMI

CONVERSATIONS WITH GEORGE LUSCOMBE

Shakespeare’s Nigga, by Joseph Pierre (pictured here with Sascha Cole), is a rich riff on the Bard.

by Steven Bush (Mosaic), $27.95 Before Buddies in Bad Times occupied the building at 12 Alexander, it was the home of Toronto Workshop Productions, one of Canada’s groundbreaking alternative companies, founded by George Luscombe a decade before the explosion of Canada-centric theatre in the late 60s and early 70s.

Steven Bush, one of Luscombe’s ensemble, sat down with the late director in 1996 to record his thoughts on theatre, training actors and, by association, politics and life. The result is this fascinating series of transcripts.

Bonus: a CD of Bush and Luscombe talking about, among other things, developing an acting ensemble.

Want to recapture that memorable stage experience, laugh at rewrites of the classics, learn more about a talented funnyman or discover an important part of Toronto theatre history? Here are some suggestions for holiday books.

FAULT LINES

by Nicolas Billon (Coach House Books), $18.95 Winner of this year’s Governor General’s Literary Award in English drama, Fault Lines is three plays (Greenland, Iceland and Faroe Islands), all of which have been performed in local festivals.

Each relies on monologues to reveal character and plot, and what ties them together is the theme of connectedness: how people, in family or other relationships, work to make a bond of some sort and how difficult that work can be.

58

DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

Billon’s skill at dissecting characters, having them reveal themselves to us when they aren’t quite aware of the unexplored depths of their personalities, is masterful.

THE SWEARING JAR

by Kate Hewlett (Scirocco), $15.95 You might have caught an early version of Hewlett’s play in the 2008 Fringe,

but it’s gone a long way since then, including to New York City and Winnipeg. Oh, and it was a finalist for the GG this year. At the play’s centre are a husband and wife whose marriage starts to develop cracks, and the guitarist she meets.

Hewlett has a great sense of dialogue and characterization, and, yes, the jar of the title is part of the plot,

intended to motivate the pregnant couple to stop swearing before the birth of their child. About time we saw a production of the two-act play here in Toronto.

SHAKESPEARE’S NIGGA

by Joseph Jomo Pierre (Playwrights Canada Press), $16.95

MOTHER. WIFE. SISTER. HUMAN. WARRIOR. FALCON. YARDSTICK. TURBAN. CABBAGE.

by Rob Delaney (Spiegel & Grau), $28.

The man dubbed the “funniest person on Twitter” follows in the tradition of Tina Fey and Mindy Kaling by penning a decent book.

Delaney intersperses some of his most hilarious tweets – which actually

Fun Christmas Sing-A-Long (Sharron Matthews/George Masswohl). ñ Matthews and Masswohl perform a holidayFSuper

The terrific Paula Wolfson returns in The Musical Of Musicals, The Musical!

themed musical show. Dec 20-21 at 8 pm. $20. Buddies in Bad Times Theatre, 12 Alexander. 416-975-8555, buddiesinbadtimes. com.

One-nighters

FAmahl And The Night Visitors by Gian

Carlo Menotti (No Strings Theatre). The oneact opera about the Three Kings is performed in concert in this funder. Dec 22 at 4 pm. $25, stu/srs $20, child $12. St Matthews Cathedral, 875 Queen E. nostringstheatre.com.

FA Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens (Humber River Shakespeare Co). Five actors perform the timeless tale of greed, ghosts, salvation and hope. Dec 20 at 7 pm. $20, child $10. Zion Church Cultural Centre, 1650 Finch E. 416-209-2026, humberrivershakespeare.ca.

Continuing Aladdin by Alan Menken, Howard Ashman,

Comedy prickly: Live at the rose That Canadian Guy Glen Foster (Foster) Rating­: NN

Like Rob Ford, comic Glen Foster knows his core group of fans really well.

He’s dubbed himself “That Cana­dian Guy” and mines material that would get smiles from the old-timers at the Brampton Timmies or the Peterborough Lions Club. In other words, I’m not much of a fan.

But the guy’s built up a solid career and has worked for more than a quarter-century. He’s also persistent. He sent me a link to this CD along with many follow-up emails. Hard worker.

I just wish I liked his act more. Compared to someone like Ron James, another over-50 white guy who sends up the problems of the average Joe or Jane, Foster doesn’t develop his material very skilfully. He goes from topic to topic, as if merely mentioning the weight of people on cruises or how terrible bank service charges are deserves laughs. It doesn’t. You’ve got to do

more with the material, sir.

There’s some moderately amusing stuff on this disc, like his bit about being stuck on the highway because of construction. His suggestion: have the workers pretend to be in an acci­dent, just so the drivers will feel their wait was worth it.

And I admit I chuckled when he says, as an aside, “I didn’t grow up in Montreal. But who does?” And I like his bit about “pre-declined credit cards,” which arrive already cut-up in the envelope.

The thing is, Foster has watered down his material so much, there’s no edge. Championing cars over public transit? Theorizing how it’s ridiculous to do a count of homeless people because, ya know, they’re homeless? Deconstructing the call centre phrase “higher than normal volume of calls”?

And don’t get me started about his impression of the Asian guy hawking his goods on an infomercial.

But then again, this Canadian guy isn’t part of Foster’s target market.

Bet Ford would love it, though.

GLENN SUMI

theatre listings How to find a listing

Theatre listings are comprehensive and appear alphabetically by title. Opening plays begin this week, Previewing shows preview this week, One-​Nighters are one-​offs, and Continuing shows have already opened. Reviews are by Glenn Sumi (GS) and Jon Kaplan (JK).

The rating system is as follows: NNNNN Standing ovation NNNN Sustained applause NNN Recommended, memorable scenes NN Seriously flawed N Get out the hook F = Festive/seasonal event

perform fully staged stories about their experiences. Dec 20-21 at 8 pm. $20, stu $10.

Winchester Street Theatre, 80 Winchester. ­brownpapertickets.com/event/511112.

SIGNED SEALED DELIVERED by Aadin Church (Ark 10 Productions). This musical revue pays tribute to Motown and soul. Opens Dec 19 and runs to Dec 29, Thu-Sun 8 pm. $49. Annex Theatre, 730 Bathurst. ticketwindow.ca.



ñ

= Critics’ pick (highly recommended)

“PERFECTLY PERFORMED...

SEE IT YOU MUST”

How to place a listing

All listings are free. Send to: stage@nowtoronto.com, fax to 416-​364-​1166 or mail to Theatre, NOW Magazine, 189 Church, Toronto M5B 1Y7. Include title, author, producer, brief synopsis, times, range of ticket prices (include stu/srs discounts and PWYC days), venue name and address and box office/info phone number. Listings may be edited for space. Deadline is the Thursday before publication at 5 pm.

Opening

helped land him this book deal – and stories from his life up until now, which includes substance abuse, depression, a love of all things Gallic, romance, parenthood and... a friendship with our own Margaret Atwood.

He’s as candid as he is comical, which makes this book extra-memorable.

NOT QUITE THE CLASSICS

by Colin Mochrie (Viking), $24 In Not Quite The Classics, improv ace and national treasure Mochrie brings the same wit and ingenuity he demonstrates in Whose Line Is It Anyway? to

Ñ

= Critics’ Pick

his debut book. Inspired by the improv game First Line, Last Line, he’s used the opening and closing passages from classics like 1984, The Great Gatsby and even The Cat In The Hat, providing hilarious stuff in the middle.

Moby-Dick’s famous “Call me Ishmael,” for instance, kicks off a story about a struggling actor who’s received this terse phone message from his agent. In each tale, Mochrie ingeniously mocks style and substance, taking things in unpredictable directions.

And apropos for this time of year, his ’Twas Not Right Before Christmas is an amusing mashup of all the seasonal favourites.

3 stage@nowtoronto.com

nnnnn = You’ll pee your pants

nnnn = Major snortage

Tim Rice and Chad Beguelin (Disney Theatrical Productions/Mirvish). This Broadway-bound adaptation of the 1992 animated movie about the resourceful street urchin who falls for a disguised princess suffers from generic new songs, an awkward structural device involving three narrators and leads who lack chemistry. But it’s worth waiting an hour for James Monroe Iglehart’s Genie, who adds a bit of stage magic to the dull proceedings.

Runs to Jan 5, 2014, Tue-Sat 7:30 pm, mat SatSun and Wed 1:30 pm (see website for more shows). $35-$130. Ed Mirvish Theatre, 244 Victoria. 416-872-1212, mirvish.com. NN (GS) Annie (TYA) by Thomas Meehan, Charles Strouse and Martin Charnin (Young People’s Theatre). This version of the popular Broadway musical, aimed at young audiences, is tuneful and offers some strong performances, but the narrative and characterizations become two-dimensional in the slimmed-down book. Jenny Weisz, perfectly cast, is a dream in the title role, innocent and optimistic without being saccharine or Pollyanna-ish. Runs to Dec 29, see website for schedule. $22-$35. 165 Front E. 416-8622222, youngpeoplestheatre.ca. NNN (JK) continued on page 60 œ

“DELIGHTFUL...

HEART-WARMING” – NOW Magazine

T he D ora Award-w inning holi d ay hit ret ur n s!

– Toronto Star

OLIVER DENNIS PATRICIA FAGAN

FA Christmas Carol adapted by David Cairns (Rose Theatre). Dickens’s tale of greed, ghosts, salvation and hope is brought to the stage. Dec 20-22, Fri-Sat 7:30 pm, Sun 2 pm. $39, child $19. Lester B. Pearson Theatre, 150 Central Park, Brampton. 905-8742800, ­rosetheatre.ca.

Disney On Ice: Princesses & Heroes (Feld Entertainment). Ariel, Belle, Jasmine, Tiana and other Disney characters appear in this family ice show. Opens Dec 20 and runs to Dec 29, daily at noon & 4 pm (except Dec 20 at 7 pm only, Dec 24-25 at 4 pm only). $28$93. Rogers Centre, 1 Blue Jays Way. 1-855985-5000, ­ticketmaster.ca.

The Musical of Musicals, The Musical! by Joanne Bogart and Eric Rockwell ñ (Mirvish). Five musicals in one, each with the

same plot but done in the style of a different Broadway composer. Opens Dec 19 and runs to Jan 5, 2014, see website for times. $19-$79. Panasonic Theatre, 651 Yonge.

416-872-1212, ­mirvish.com.

FNativity Story (Ensemble Svitlo). The story of the first Christmas is performed in Ukrainian. Dec 21-22, Sat 3 pm, Sun 2 pm. $20. Factory Theatre, 125 Bathurst. 416504-9971, factorytheatre.ca.

MUS T CL OSE

DECEMBER 28 gen erously su pport ed by

PARFUMERIE MIKLÓS LÁSZLÓ

ADAPTED BY ADAM PET TLE & BRENDA ROBINS

2013 lead sponsors

photo: cylla von tiedemann

Shakespeare-In-Hospitals Project Showcase (Spur-of-the-Moment Shakespeare

Collective). Program graduates Clare Blackwood, Cameron Lapp, Louisa Zhu and others

nnn = Coupla guffaws

nn = More tequila, please

n = Was that a pin dropping?

NOW december 19-25 2013

59

theatre listings œcontinued from page 59

Avenue Q by Robert Lopez and Jeff Marx (Lower Ossington Theatre). A college grad moves to NYC and transitions to adulthood in this adult musical puppet play. Runs to Feb 23, 2014, Thu-Sat 8 pm, mat Sat 2 pm, Sun 4 pm (no shows Dec 23-Jan 2). $49-$59. 100A Ossington. ­lowerossingtontheatre.com.

FA Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens (Humber River Shakespeare Co). Five actors perform the timeless tale of greed, ghosts, salvation and hope. Runs to Dec 21, Sat 2 and 7 pm. $20, child $10. Montgomery’s Inn, 4709 Dundas W. ­humberrivershakespeare.ca.

FThe Christmas Story (Church of the Holy Trinity). Professional musicians and a volunteer cast present a nativity pageant. Runs to Dec 22, Fri-Sun 7:30 pm, Sat-Sun 4:30 pm. $20, child $5 (suggested donation). 10 Trinity Square. 416-598-8979, ­thechristmasstory.ca.

FCool Yule (Famous People Players). The black-light dinner theatre company presents a multifaith celebration of the holidays. Runs to Jan 4, 2014, call/see website for times. $40-

$62. 343 Evans. 416-532-1137, fpp.org.

Elizabeth - Darcy: An Adaptation Of Pride And Prejudice by Hallie Burt and ñ Kate Werneburg (Burt and Werneburg). Two

women play all the parts and go through the venue’s historic rooms in this remount of the Fringe play based on the Jane Austen novel.

Runs to Dec 29, Wed-Sat 8 pm (and Dec 22, 29), mat Sat-Sun 2 pm (and Dec 27); no shows Dec 25-26. $20 (totix.ca). Campbell House Museum, 160 Queen W. 416-597-0227 ext 2, ­burtandwerneburg.com.

Evil Dead – The Musical by Christopher Bond, George Reinblatt, Frank Cipolla and Melissa Morris (Starvox Entertainment/Jeffrey Latimer Entertainment). The homegrown musical based on the splatterific cult horror films gets a 10th anniversary production that’s chock full of intentional stupidity and silliness. Excessive mugging mars the first act, but there are lots of surprises (and better songs) in act two. Ryan Ward reprises his role as the stiff, chainsaw-wielding Ash. And the directors have found some inventive ways to illustrate

Opening

FThe Nutcracker Pia Bouman School for Ballet and Creative Movement presents the holiday classic performed by youth ages 7 through 18. Dec 19-22, Thu-Fri 7:30 pm, SatSun 2 pm. $15-$40. Humberside Collegiate Institute, 280 Quebec, Lismer Hall. 416-5338705, piaboumanschool.org/tickets.

FThe Nutcracker Toronto International Ballet Theatre presents the Russian classical version of the holiday ballet. Dec 20-21 at 7 pm, mat Sat 2 pm. $40-$70. Toronto Centre for the Arts, 5040 Yonge. ­torontoballet.ca.

theatre review action comedy

Cop to it

SPECIAL CONStABLES written by Alec Toller, and the cast (Circlesnake Productions).

At the Storefront Theatre (955 Bloor West). To Saturday (December 21). $20. secureaseat.com. See Continuing, this page. Rating: NNN

Once by Enda Walsh, Glen Hansard and Markéta Irglová (Mirvish). This adaptation of John Carney’s indie hit movie about two Dubliners – one a busker, the other a Czech emigré – who make beautiful music together yet can’t be a couple throbs with honest emotion. The staging is simple yet effective, with evocative choreography and music (the actors are all musicians) that can swell to huge climaxes or descend to moments of heartbreaking poetry. It’s a shame leads Stuart Ward and Dani De Waal lack chemistry. Runs to Jan 5, 2014, Tue-Sat 8 pm, mat Sat-Sun and Wed 2 pm (no shows Dec 24, 25 and Jan 1. See website for more dates). $35-$130. Royal Alexandra Theatre, 260 King W. 416-872-1212, mirvish.com. NNNN (GS) FParfumerie by Miklós László (Soulpepper). Soulpepper’s revival of this affectionate, old-world romantic comedy fol-

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upcoming works at this weekly show. Mon 10 pm. Free. Statler’s, 487 Church. 416-9220487.

Special Constables (Circlesnake Productions). This action-comedy features the TTC Transit Police taking on a Metropass counterfeiting ring (see review, this page). Runs to Dec 21, Wed-Sun 8 pm, mat Sat 2 pm. $20.

The Storefront Theatre, 955 Bloor W. circlesnake.com. NNN (Jordan Bimm) Venus In Fur by David Ives (Canadian Stage).

Ives’s two-hander is part theatre industry send-up, part sexy/funny look at the origins of sadomasochism and part critique of gender power shifts through the ages. It’s also a bravura acting showcase, which is where this production is a bit of a letdown. As Vanda, a streetwise, struggling New Yawk actor who tries to convince a playwright (a fine Rick Miller) she’s right for a role, Carly Street is skilful, disciplined and watchable, but she never disappears into any character. There are some sound issues on the set-within-a-set, but there’s lots to enjoy in Jennifer Tarver’s production. Runs to Dec 29, Tue-Sat 7 pm, mat Sat-Sun 1 pm (Dec 24 at 1 pm; no shows Dec 25-26). $24-$99. Berkeley Street Theatre, 26 Berkeley. canadianstage.com. NNN (GS) FWeather The Weather by Haley ­McGee (Theatre Columbus). A young girl must outwit trolls and gnomes in this outdoor production for all ages (see review, page 61). Runs to Dec 30, Tue-Sun 8 pm, mat Dec 21 and 23 at 5 pm (no shows Dec 24-26). $12.50-$32. Evergreen Brick Works, 550 Bayview. 416-504-7529, theatrecolumbus. ca. NNNN (JK) 3

chase up Spadina – Three Tone jumps up on top of one of the cars, the shift in levels nicely conveyed by the crouching actors portraying the streetcars.

Munch’s trench-coat-clad villain is the most fun to watch; the best moments find him making incredibly dark threats to his minions, only to quickly

dial it back and play it like he was only kidding. Munch’s captivating performance makes it clear that he’d be just as convincing as a totally serious evildoer.

Though there are few surprises, the string of local laughs makes the 90-minute ride worth the fare.

JORDAN BIMM

FThe

Metropass thieves and token forgers led by awesomely named mastermind Three Tone (Colin Munch) and his two underlings, Rails (Chris Wilson) and Skitch (Mikaela Dyke).

Like a subway, the plot never deviates from a predictable track, but Toller and the very able cast, drawn from local troupes Sex T Rex and Peter n’ Chris,

score consistent laughs with jokes designed for TTC riders about the long gap between St. Clair West and Eglinton West stations or the old handfulof-change fare-evasion trick.

With minimal sets, the cast use inventive group movement to conjure up turnstiles and subway cars. In one memorable sequence – a streetcar

Continuing

Singular Sensation: A Music Theatre Open Mic (Jennifer Walls). Sing showñ tunes with a live band and see previews of

Little Mermaid: Ontario’s OFish-Al Family Musical by Reid Janisse ñ (Ross Petty Productions). Janisse’s panto take

FThe Nutcracker The National Ballet of Canada presents the traditional holiday ballet.

Colonel Chris Hadfield makes his Cannon Doll debut Dec 24 at 1 pm. Runs to Jan 4, 2014, see website for schedule. $25-$165. Four Seasons Centre for the Performing Arts, 145 Queen W. 416-345-9595, national.ballet.ca.

3

FThe Nutcracker Ballet Victoria Ballet Company presents the seasonal classic presented in the traditional Marinskii style. Dec 20-22, Fri-Sun 7 pm, mat Sat 2 pm. $40-$78.

Richmond Hill Centre for the Performing Arts, 10268 Yonge. 905-787-8811, r­ hcentre.ca.

lows the stressed-out staff of a Budapest cosmetics shop during the Christmas rush.

Solid acting, clever directing and a great set make this heartwarming love story a holiday classic. Runs to Dec 28, see website for schedule. $32-$68. Young Centre for the Performing Arts, 55 Mill. 416-866-8666, soulpepper.ca.

NNNN (Jordan Bimm) Peter Pan by JM Barrie (Hit and Run Dance Productions). This abridged version of the tale features ballet, sword fights, music, storytelling and more. Runs to Dec 29, Sat-Sun (see website for times and other dates). Free w/ admission. Casa Loma, 1 Austin Terrace. 416923-1171, casaloma.org.

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on the Little Mermaid is a socially aware yet light-hearted look at what’s happening down at Toronto’s waterfront, all seen from the novel perspective of its underwater creatures.

The plot is swift, the topical jokes very funny and the songs beautifully performed by a talented cast that includes Stratford’s Chilina Kennedy, the always amusing Edie Glen and Dan Chameroy and musical comedy powerhouse Lana Carillo. Runs to Jan 4, 2014, see website for schedule. $27-$85. Elgin Theatre, 189 Yonge. 1-855-599-9090, rosspetty.com.

NNNN (GS) Little Shop Of Horrors by Howard Ashman and Alan Menken (Lower Ossington Theatre).

A flower shop clerk raises a plant that feeds on human blood in this musical. Runs to Jan 12, 2014, Thu-Sat 8 pm, mat Sat 2 pm, Sun 4 pm (no shows Dec 22-Jan 2). $59. 100A Ossington. lowerossingtontheatre.com.

Magic At The Winchester (Abracadabaret).

James Alan hosts a weekly live magic show with guests. Runs to Dec 29, Sun 7 pm. $15.

Winchester Kitchen & Bar, 51A Winchester. abracadabaret.com.

Oliver! by Lionel Bart (The Civic Light-Opera Co). This musical is based on Charles Dickens’s novel Oliver Twist. Runs to Dec 22, Thu-Sat 8 pm, mat Sat-Sun 2 pm. $28. Fairview Library, 35 Fairview Mall. musictheatre­toronto.com.

dance listings F = Festive/seasonal event

fake stage blood. Runs to Jan 5, 2014, Tue-Thu 8 pm, Fri-Sat 7 & 10:30 pm, Sun 3 pm. $19.99$79.99. Randolph Theatre, 736 Bathurst. ­evildeadthemusical.com. NNN (GS) Les Miserables by Alain Boublil and Claude-Michel Schönberg (Cameron Mackintosh/Mirvish). This 25th-anniversary production of the popular musical is dominated by Ramin Karimloo, whose ex-con Jean Valjean grows in complexity and depth and delivers some transcendent moments, even if he’s too young to pull off the final scenes.

He’s surrounded by lots of talent and a handsome production that’s majestic yet intimate, with stirring new orchestrations that add extra fire to this dramatic musical.

Runs to Feb 2, 2014, Tue-Sat 7:30 pm, mat Sat-Sun and Wed 1:30 pm (no shows Dec 24-25; see website for exceptions/extra shows). $35-$130. Princess of Wales Theatre, 300 King W. 416-872-1212, mirvish. com. NNNN (GS)

Patricia Fagan and Oliver ­Dennis swoon in ­seasonal classic Parfumerie.

ñ

ñ

Conor Bradbury (left), Amy Kitz, Mikaela Dyke, Tim Walker, Colin Munch and Chris Wilson are pretty Special.

This fast-paced action parody sets its heists, fights and chase scenes close to home in a familiar setting: the TTC. With transit woes a near-daily occurrence, having a good laugh at the Better Way is actually quite therapeutic.

The central joke hinges on the quasipolice force that patrolled the system until being disbanded in 2011. (Coincidentally, the TTC and the Toronto Police just decided to restore special constables last week.) The cancellation provides writer/director Alec Toller with the perfect backdrop to imagine the trope of the disgraced, reckless cop from movies like Lethal Weapon and 48 Hours playing out on the TTC. The stock characters are quickly introduced: Jameson (Tim Walker), a hard-boiled ex-special constable with a reputation for taking things too far, who’s been sidelined ever since “the incident”; his two ex-partners, nerdy computer specialist Mouse (Amy Kitz) and slow-witted muscleman Stokes (Conor Bradbury). They’re pitted against a ring of tunnel-dwelling

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december 19-25 2013 NOW

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= Critics’ Pick

nnnnn = Standing ovation

nnnn = Sustained applause

nnn = Recommended, memorable scenes

nn = Seriously flawed

n = Get out the hook

TERRIFIC WOMEN The Flying Beaver Pubaret

comedy listings

theatre review

How to find a listing

British Teeth’s​ Allana Reoch and Filip Jeremic show bite at Christmas Slut Party,​ December 19.

Comedy listings appear chronologically, and alphabetically by title or venue.

F = Festive/seasonal event

ñ= Critics’ pick (highly recommended) How to place a listing

All listings are free. Send to: stage@nowtoronto.com, fax 416-​364-​1166 or mail to Comedy, NOW Magazine, 189 Church, Toronto M5B 1Y7. Include title, producer, comics (host/headliner/sketch troupe members), brief synopsis, days and times, range of ticket prices, venue name and address and box office/info phone number/website. Listings may be edited for space. Deadline is the Thursday before publication at 5 pm.

ABSOLUTE COMEDY presents headliner Tommy

outdoor show

Home truths WEATHER THE WEATHER, OR HOW

ñWE MAKE IT HOME TOGETHER

by

Haley McGee (Theatre Columbus). At Evergreen Brick Works (550 Bayview).

Through December 30. $12.50-$32. 416504-7529. See Continuing, page 60. ­Rating: NNNN

In this cold snap, at this time of year, it’s easy to start thinking about family and what home signifies for each of us.

Those are the themes of Theatre Columbus’s all-ages fable Weather The Weather, Or How We Make It Home Together, by Haley McGee. Like the company’s recent predecessors, it’s a walkabout production at Evergreen Brick Works.

It begins as the world is whirled around in a humongous storm that uproots people and flings them to distant corners of the globe. Daga (Amy Lee), the practical sib, wants to return home, while her brother Diwrnod (Kawa Ada), struck by lightning during the storm, is a dreamer looking for a new life.

Travelling with their protective, ini­ tially inanimate family gnome, Tomte (Colin Doyle), they decide to separate.

Daga meets a romantic, goldenlocked, magical prince (Courtenay Stevens). Diwrnod is captured by Igora (Lisa Karen Cox), the angry troll who called forth the storm.

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= Critics’ Pick

Though the narrative takes a while to come together and some of its elements are sketchy, the production is a delight. Director Jennifer Brewin knows exactly how to move viewers through the winter landscape as we follow the lit lamp hoisted by our guide (Lindy Zucker).

Lamps and light, in fact, are central in the show. Igora, lonely and loveless, craves light to make up for her isolation, and Diwrnod’s regular jolts of electricity help feed her need. The troll sports a pair of illuminated Brünnhilde horns (the clever costumes are by Catherine Hahn), and her gibberish-spouting minions have lampshade heads.

Glenn Davidson, who apparently can do anything with light, helps create the magical world through which we travel, as does John Millard’s Fellini-esque score.

The cast has a great time making the clownish figures leap about in the cold. Lee’s self-important Daga, reliant on the logic of her compass and map, learns that there’s more to life than reason, and Ada’s Diwrnod moves from easy gull to discerning brother.

Doyle zestfully brings Tomte to life, Cox makes a moody commander of the elements, and Stevens’s scatterbrained royal provides a resolution to the tumultuous world situation.

Weather The Weather ends with a celebratory return home, where myth becomes reality and we all get to feel, if only for a short time, what it means JON KAPLAN to be a family.

nnnnn = You’ll pee your pants

nnnn = Major snortage

ñ ñ

FTHE SECOND CITY HOLIDAY SPECTACULAR (MIRACLES NOT INCLUDED) Second City pre-

sents sketches, songs and improvisations to celebrate and satirize the holiday season. To Jan 1, Thu 1:30 & 10 pm, Fri 1:30 & 4 pm Sat 4 pm, Mon 4 & 8 pm (no shows Dec 24-25). $22.

51 Mercer. 416-343-0011, secondcity.com.

WE CAN BE HEROES Second City’s latest revue – inspired by the idea that our society’s quickly going to hell – is one of its sharpest in a while. Newcomer Connor Thompson scores big laughs playing everything from a literal bat man to a blind lifeguard, while Craig Brown channels his inner Chaplin as a balding man having a terrible day. Meanwhile, Jan Caruana proves she’s got great range in two scenes involving a precocious girl. Even the less successful sketches are sharply directed, and the set and musical design help enhance the scenes. Not to be missed. Indefinite run, Tue-Wed 8 pm, Thu and Sun 7:30 pm, Fri-Sat 7:30 & 10 pm (no shows Dec 24-25). $24-$29, stu $15. 51 Mercer. 416-343-0011, secondcity. com. NNNN (GS) YUK YUK’S DOWNTOWN presents ­Michael Gelbart. To Dec 22, Thu-Sun 8 pm, plus Fri-Sat 10:30 pm. $13-$22. 224 Richmond W. 416-967-6425, ­yukyuks.com.

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ABSOLUTE COMEDY Second City Training Cen-

tre presents the Stand-Up 101 Grad Show featuring new comics and host Evan Carter. 3 pm. $5. Evening show, see Thu 19. 2335 Yonge.

416-486-7700, absolutecomedy.ca.

COMEDY AT THE VICTORY CAFE presents a weekly show w/ host Vanessa Dangerstorm.

9 pm. Free. Victory Café, 581 Markham. 416516-5787, victorycafe.ca.

HAPPY HOUR COMEDY Ein-Stein presents an open-mic show w/ host Julia Bruce and others. 8 pm. Free. 229 College. ein-stein.ca.

Miracle On Mercer St. See Sat 21.

THE PLAYGROUND Playful Grounds presents weekly open-mic comedy w/ hosts Kris Siddiqi and Melissa Story. 9 pm. Free. 605 College. 416-645-0484, playfulgrounds.com.

SUNDAY NIGHT LIVE The Sketchersons present a weekly show w/ guest hosts and musical acts. 9 pm. $10. Comedy Bar, 945 Bloor W. thesketchersons.com.

We Can Be Heroes See Thu 19.

Yuk Yuk’s Downtown See Thu 19.

Monday, December 23 ALTDOT COMEDY LOUNGE Rivoli presents Alex Pavone, Bryan Hatt, Trixx, Danny ñ Polishchuk, Adam Christie, Rhiannon Archer,

ñ

Kawa Ada (left), Lisa Karen Cox and Amy Lee help you Weather The Weather.

Sunday, December 22

ñ

Thursday, December 19 Savitt w/ Adrian Cronk and host Barry Taylor.

To Dec 22, Thu 8:30 pm, Fri 9 pm, Sat 8 & 10:45 pm, Sun 8 pm. $15-$20. 2335 Yonge.

416-486-7700, ­absolutecomedy.ca.

BEERPROV: THE DRAFT Jim Robinson presents up-and-coming improvisers competing in a series of elimination games. 9:30 pm. $12.

Comedy Bar, 945 Bloor W. facebook.com/ BeerProv.

FCHRISTMAS SLUT PARTY British Teeth present sketch, stand-up and character pieces w/ Ladystache, Scott Thompson and host Evany Rosen. 8 pm. $10. Comedy Bar, 945 Bloor W. 416-551-6540, comedybar.ca.

GIGGLES @ THE GROOVE BAR presents a weekly open-mic w/ rotating hosts. 9:30 pm. Free.

1952 Danforth. sssuperfly@hotmail.com.

KITCH KOMEDY presents a weekly show. 9 pm.

Free. Kitch, 229 Geary. kitchbar.com.

LAUGH SABBATH Comedy Bar presents Dylan Gott, Zabrina Chevannes, Andrew Johnston, John Hastings and host Adam Christie. 9:30 pm. $5. 945 Bloor W. ­laughsabbath.com.

NOT MY DOG COMEDY presents a weekly open mic w/ host Hannah Hogan. 8:30 pm. Free.

Not My Dog, 1510 Queen W. 416-532-2397.

QUIP TALK WITH NICKY The LOT Comedy Club presents a monthly comedy talk show taping w/ Colin Mochrie, Mantown, host Nicky Nasrallah and others. 8 pm. Free.

100 Ossington. ­quipmag.com/quiptalk.

presents comedy in the style of a 70s cable access program w/ Sara Hennessey and Stephanie Kaliner. 9 pm. $10-$15. 488 Parliament. 647-347-6567, pubaret.com.

We Can Be Heroes See Thu 19.

Yuk Yuk’s Downtown See Thu 19.

TOP SHELF COMEDY presents The Main Event, a weekly pro headliner and others. 9:30 pm. $5. St Louis Bar & Grill, 1963 Queen E. 416637-7427, facebook.com/TopShelfComedy.

THE NIGHT BEFORE BEERPROV Jim Robinson presents a holiday edition ñ of the monthly improv competition w/ guest F’TWAS

Colin Mochrie. 10:30 pm. $15. Comedy Bar, 945 Bloor W. facebook.com/BeerProv.

We Can Be Heroes See Thu 19.

Yuk Yuk’s Downtown See Thu 19.

Saturday, December 21 Absolute Comedy See Thu 19.

FMIRACLE ON MERCER ST. Second City pre-

sents all-ages seasonal comedy mixing liveaction sketches with puppetry and songs. To Jan 1, Dec 21-23 daily at 2 pm plus Sun 4 pm.

Dec 26-Jan 1 daily at 2 pm (except Dec 31 at noon). $14, family 4-pack $45. 51 Mercer. 416343-0011, secondcity.com.

MOSHE KASHER Comedy Bar presents the comic in a live show. 8 and 10:30 pm. $20. 945 Bloor W. 416-551-6540, ticketweb.ca.

ñ

The Second City Holiday Spectacular (­Miracles Not Included) See Thu 19.

Evergreen

Steve Patrick Adams, Michael Khardas, Paddy Forde, MC Chris Locke and others. 9 pm. $5.

332 Queen W. altdotcomedylounge.com.

CHEAP LAUGHS MONDAY PJ O’Briens Irish Pub presents a weekly show w/ Russell Roy and guests. 9:30 pm. Free. 39 Colborne. 416-8157562.

DIRTY CHRISTMAS COMEDY SHOW presents Kenny Robinson and Darren ñ Frost. 8 pm. $20-$25. Royal Cinema, 608 ColFTHE

lege. t­ icketweb.ca.

IMPERIAL COMEDY SHOW Imperial Pub pre-

sents 10 comics, a pro headliner and rotating hosts every week. 9:30 pm. Free. 54 Dundas E. 416-977-4667, imperialcomedy.com.

Miracle On Mercer St. See Sat 21.

The Second City Holiday Spectacular (­Miracles Not Included) See Thu 19.

TOP SHELF COMEDY presents The Tournament, an amateur comic competition decided by audience votes, plus a pro comic pre-show & headliner. 8 pm. Free. The Office Pub, 117 John. facebook.com/TopShelfComedy.

Tuesday, December 24 THE SKIN OF MY NUTS presents a weekly open mic w/ Vandad Kardar. 9:30 pm. Free. Sonic Cafe, 60 Cecil. facebook.com/skinofmynuts.

Wednesday, December 25 No Listings – Happy Holidays

BRICK WORKS & THEATRE

Columbus

3

Un On til Now De c3 0!

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Friday, December 20 Absolute Comedy See Thu 19.

FBEER O’CLOCK CHRISTMAS EXTRAVAGANZA

Free Times Café presents anti-social comedy for the holidays. 8 pm. Free. 320 College. 416967-1078.

CATCH 23 Comedy Bar presents a weekly improv pit fight. 8 pm. $10. 945 Bloor W. 416551-6540, comedybar.ca.

THE NIGHT IS YOUNG Dean Young presents comedy with a late-show feel w/ Dom Pare, Daniel Woodrow, Sara Hennessey, headliner Ryan Belleville, host Young and cohost Andy Itwaru. 8 pm. $10. Comedy Bar, 945 Bloor W. 416-551-6540, comedybar.ca.

ñ

The Second City Holiday Spectacular (­Miracles Not Included) See Thu 19.

nnn = Coupla guffaws

nn = More tequila, please

Weather the Weather

By Haley McGee

Directed by Jennifer Brewin

OUTDOOR WINTER THEATRE

DECEMBER 6 – 30, 2013 theatrecolumbus.ca n = Was that a pin dropping?

FREE SHUTTLE FROM BROADVIEW STATION

artsboxoffice.ca 416.504.7529 NOW december 19-25 2013

61

art

MUST-SEE SHOWS F indicates festive events FABBOZZO GALLERY Holiday Selections,

MULTIMEDIA

Library love

Koffler fetes its school connection By FRAN SCHECHTER WE’RE IN THE LIBRARY at the

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Koffler Gallery (Artscape Youngplace, 180 Shaw), to January 19. 647-9250643. Rating: NNNN

At a time when libraries are (again) under attack, Koffler Gallery inaugurates its new downtown space in Artscape’s classy renovation of Shaw Street Public School with a paean to the rooms’ former occupant: the school library. Curator Mona Filip commissioned seven local artist to comment on the building’s history through themes of childhood, learning, reading, language and memory.

Sara Angelucci continues her investigation of found photography by mounting gradually darkening images of early-20th-century schoolchildren in foldout books. The haunting disappearing photos are displayed on a book trolley equipped with headphones that play children’s voices reading stories.

The past is also a focus for Adam

MONEY CAN'T BUY HAPPINESS, BUT IT CAN BUY BOOKS...

WHICH IS PRETTY CLOSE.

David Brown, whose mesmerizing revolving circle of Encyclopedia Britannica volumes channels old playground spinners. Barbara Astman pays tribute to the inspirational power and poetic beauty of old books, covering a wall with pages from a beloved children’s natural history text that she’s overlain with coloured versions of their black-and-white illustrations.

Language is a subject for Michelle Gay, whose digital display of computerized (mis-)translations conjures changing modes of communication as well as the struggles of immigrants (an issue echoed in Brown’s chalkdust facsimile of the Rosetta Stone), and Ido Govrin, whose fuzzy wall broadcasts whispered passages from authors’ final works, a kind of valedictory for the printed word.

Barbara Astman’s wall of pages honours the beauty of old bo0ks; Sara Angelucci combines found photography and the voices of schoolchildren.

The students of adjacent GivinsShaw PS participated in two projects: Vid Ingelevics asked them to draw impressions of the 60s that might have been part of a lost mural painted at Shaw in that period, then animated them into an amusing video. In a riff on multicultural commercials, Jon Sasaki filmed the kids in his typical deadpan fashion; instead of enacting some kind of advertisinghyped glee, they stand around looking bored or confused.

THIS WEEK IN THE MUSEUMS ART GALLERY OF ONTARIO Aimia Photog-

raphy Prize, to Jan 5. The Great Upheaval: Modern Masterpieces From The Guggenheim, to Mar 2 ($25, stu $16.50). Light My Fire: Portraits, to Apr 30. Brian Jungen and Duane Linklater, to Jun 15. $19.50, srs $16, stu $11, free Wed 6-8:30 pm (special exhibits excluded). 317 Dundas W. 416-979-6648.

BATA SHOE MUSEUM Out Of The Box: The Rise Of Sneaker Culture, to Mar 30. $14, srs $12, stu $8. 327 Bloor W. 416-979-7799.

CITY OF TORONTO ARCHIVES Life On The Grid: 100 Years Of Street Photography, to May 31.

255 Spadina Rd. 416-397-0778.

DESIGN EXCHANGE Playing Favourites II: Geometry (Textures), to Jan 3. 100% TobeUs: 100 Cars, to Feb 9 (free, todesignoffsite. com). $10, stu/srs $8. 234 Bay. 416-3636121.

DORIS McCARTHY GALLERY You Cannot Kill What Is Already Dead, to Jan 25. 1265 Military Trail. 416-287-7007.

GARDINER MUSEUM Nurielle Stern; The Art

Of The Everyday: Faience In 17th And 18th Century France, to Jan 5. Animal Stories, to Jan 12. $12, stu $6, srs $8; Fri 4-9 pm halfprice, 30 and under free. 111 Queen’s Park.

416-586-8080.

JUSTINA M. BARNICKE Something More Than A Succession Of Notes, to Dec 20. Céline Condorelli, ongoing. 7 Hart House. 416-978-8398.

McMICHAEL CANADIAN ART Kim Dorland, to Jan 5. Karine Giboulo, to Jan 26. $15, stu/srs $12. 10365 Islington (Kleinburg). 905-8931121.

MOCCA David Cronenberg: Transformations; Through The Eye, to Dec 29. 952 Queen W. 416-395-0067.

OAKVILLE GALLERIES Sonny Assu (Centennial Sq, 120 Navy); A Noble Line (Gairloch Gdns, 1306 Lakeshore E), to Feb 16. 905-844-4402.

ONTARIO SCIENCE CENTRE BioART: Contemporary Art And The Life Sciences, to Feb 2. $20, stu/srs $16. 770 Don Mills. 416-696-1000.

POWER PLANT More Than Two; Micah Lexier, to Jan 5. 231 Queens Quay W.

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books FAMILY SAGA

Lesser Lamb RAISING STEAM

by Terry Pratchett

84 Harbord St • 416-963-9993

bakkaphoenixbooks.com 62

DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

WE ARE WATER by Wally Lamb (HarperCollins), 561 pages, $32.99 cloth. Rating: NN Wally Lamb (She’s Come Undone, I Know This Much Is True) is one of those rare male writers who create consistently believable female characters, but he fails on that front in his latest novel, We Are Water.

Set in small-town Connecticut, the story is told from the points of view of family members preparing for the

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wedding of rising art star Annie and her art dealer Viveca.

Annie has three adult children from her 27-year marriage to psychologist Orion, and all of them have their own reaction to the coming nuptials. Single-mother-to-be Arianne is the comfort to her dad, who’s still devastated from the divorce; her twin brother, born-again Andrew; and her thwarted, boozing actor sister, Marissa.

Most of the focus is on Annie herself, whose traumatic childhood, including sexual abuse at the hands of

It’s a fitting debut for Koffler in the Queen West art district, showcasing some of our art scene’s best and engaging the school community (a practice we hope will continue), at once looking back and forward.

3 art@nowtoronto

416-973-4949.

ROYAL ONTARIO MUSEUM Mesopotamia: In-

venting Our World, to Jan 5 ($27, srs/stu $24.50; Fri after 4:30 pm $23, srs/stu $20).

Raja Deen Dayal, to Jan 12. BIG, to Jan 26.

Carbon 14: Climate Is Culture, to Feb 2.

Wildlife Photographer Of The Year, to Mar 23. $15, stu/srs $13.50; Fri 4:30-8:30 pm $9, stu/srs $8. 100 Queen’s Park. 416-586-8000.

TEXTILE MUSEUM Ancestry And Artistry: Maya Textiles From Guatemala, to Jan 12.

Heather Goodchild and Jérôme Havre, to Apr 13. Telling Stories, to Apr 13. $15, srs $10, stu $6; pwyc Wed 5-8 pm. 55 Centre.

416-599-5321.

U OF T ART CENTRE Framing Narratives: Renaissance To Modernism, to Mar 8. 15 King’s College Circle. 416-978-1838.

VARLEY Moving Side And Forward: Collection of York U; Excavations, to Jan 12. $5, stu/srs $4. 216 Main (Unionville). 905-4779511.

MORE ONLINE

Complete art listings at nowtoronto.com/art/listings

her cousin, has turned her into an angry woman – great for her art, terrible for her children, especially her son.

Lamb delivers some deft social commentary on the subject of gay marriage, and a subplot that delves into a racist episode in the town’s past makes the important point that New England is not a liberal hotbed through and through.

The problem is that we have no idea what Annie sees in her privileged, seemingly unaware bride-tobe. Though many of the chapters are told from Annie’s perspective, Lamb

to Jan 4. 401 Richmond W. 416-260-2220.

FBAU-XI PHOTO 1/1: Single Editions, to Dec 22. 324 Dundas W. 416-977-0400.

FCAMERON HOUSE Sam Ferrara, to Dec 31. 408 Queen W. 416-703-0811.

FCANADIAN SCULPTURE CENTRE Holiday Spirit group show, to Jan 10. 500 Church.

647-435-5858.

CONVENIENCE Prints: Daryl Vocat, to Jan 2.

58 Lansdowne. conveniencegallery.com.

DE LUCA FINE ART Painting: Viktor Mitic, to Dec 28. 217 Avenue Rd. 416-537-4699.

DIAZ CONTEMPORARY Mixed media: Patrick Bernatchez, to Dec 21. 100 Niagara.

416-361-2972.

FGENERAL HARDWARE CONTEMPORARY

2nd Floor Surprise group show, to Dec 21.

1520 Queen W. 416-821-3060.

GEORGIA SCHERMAN PROJECTS Ulysses Castellanos, to Jan 11. 133 Tecumseth.

416-554-4112.

GLADSTONE HOTEL Artists, Amps & Easels (benefit for SKETCH), 8 pm-2 am Dec 19 ($10, $5 w/ art supplies donation). Installation: Jacqueline Treloar, to Dec 22, reception 7-10 pm Dec 19, open house noon-5 pm Dec 21. Lisa Brown, to Jan 5. 1214 Queen W. 416-531-4635.

JAPAN FOUNDATION Yokohama Noh Theatre Photography, to Jan 31. 131 Bloor W. 416-966-1600, jftor.org.

LESLIEVILLE GALLERY CRAWL 1-6 pm Dec 22.

Various locations on Queen E of Carlaw.

416-406-6772.

LOOP GALLERY Mixed media: J Lynn Campbell and Gary Clement, to Dec 29. 1273 Dundas W. 416-516-2581.

MERCER UNION Geoffrey Farmer, to Jan 14. 1286 Bloor W. 416-536-1519.

O’BORN CONTEMPORARY Photos: Mark Peckmezian, to Dec 20. 131 Ossington. 416-413-9555.

OLGA KORPER Painting: Ron Shuebrook, to Jan 18. 17 Morrow. 416-538-8220.

FONTARIO CRAFTS COUNCIL Pop-Up Craft Shop, to Dec 24 (Mon-Sun 11 am-7 pm, Thur till 9 pm, craft.on.ca). 990 Queen W. 416-925-4222.

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SILVER PLATTER CONTEMPORARY ART PROJECTS José Andrés Mora, ongoing. 34 Silver (rooftop).

STEPHEN BULGER Summer Lovin’ group

show, to Jan 18. 1026 Queen W. 416-5040575.

TIFF BELL LIGHTBOX David Cronenberg: Evolution, to Jan 19 ($15, stu $12, Tue $5). 350 King W. 416-599-8433.

FVERSO GALLERY Prints: Felices Fiestas, to Jan 12. 1160 Queen W. 416-605-6894.

TWIST GALLERY Lives (On Canvas) group show, to Dec 21. 1100 Queen W. 416-5882222.

WALNUT CONTEMPORARY Little Salon: These Post-Neo-Pop Like Days group show, to Jan 23. 201 Niagara. 416-271-6599.

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offers no insights into the relationship. He maintains such a distance from the couple and concentrates so intensely on Viveca’s elaborate arrangements for the wedding that you almost hope it won’t take place.

As the event approaches and the principals are set to converge, the narrative tension definitely deepens.

But it’s hard to get invested in it.

SUSAN G. COLE susanc@nowtoronto.com | @susangcole

READINGS THIS WEEK Sunday, December 22 POETRY SLAM Spoken word competition. 7 pm. $5. Drake Underground, 1150 Queen W. thedrakehotel.ca. books@nowtoronto.com

= Critics’ Pick NNNNN = This could change your life NNNN = Brain candy NNN = Solid, sometimes inspirational NN = Not quite there N = Are we at the mall?

EAT, DRINK, BE MERRY AND CATCH A MOVIE. PEOPLE SEE MORE FILMS OVER THE HOLIDAYS THAN AT ANY OTHER TIME. SO WE’VE REVIEWED ALL THE NEW RELEASES AND TALKED TO SOME OF THE BIG STARS. AND BECAUSE IT’S AWARDS SEASON, WE’VE MONITORED ALL THE OSCAR BUZZ. CHECK OUT LOADS OF EXTRAS AT NOWTORONTO.COM/MOVIES.

NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

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opens dec 20

Oscar Isaac (left) and Justin Timberlake beautifully get us ­Inside Llewyn Davis.

Inside Llewyn Davis

the coen brothers shed light on a lost character in a lost moment in american musical cultural history By NORMAN WILNER

gets in his own way to a certain degree.”

MacDougal Street, co-written with Elijah Wald, offers a The important thing about Llewyn Davis is that he window into the Greenwich Village folk circuit. isn’t a fraud or a hack. The Coens weren’t interested in “Wald called that period a sort of lost moment in mocking the character.

American musical cultural history,” Joel says. “That “For us, the interesting thing was that he is good at moment, the end of the 50s and the beginning of the what he does,” Joel says. “It’s not the story of somebody 60s, before the culture was really transformed by who’s not getting traction or isn’t being successpeople like Bob Dylan and those who came with ful because they’re not good. It’s someone who him and after him. And because it’s less known, writer/ isn’t being successful or not getting traction it becomes a little bit more exotic, and for us a directors despite the fact that they are good, and that little bit more interesting in terms of the setinterview was more interesting.” ting for a story. You know, the fact that people We see Llewyn Davis’s talent shine whenare less aware of it is not a bad thing for ever he picks up a guitar – even when roped us. It’s a good thing.”

3 normw@nowtoronto.com | into a recording session for a novelty song @wilnervision about the space race – which makes Inside Llewyn Davis a proper musical. People don’t burst into song, exactly, but the narrative stops dead a number of times to watch the characters perform, and it’s lovely.

“It takes all the burden off of us,” Joel laughs. “We don’t have to do anything.”

The brothers reached out to T-Bone Burnett, whom they’d consulted for the brilliant bluegrass soundtrack of O Brother, Where Art Thou?, to find the right folk tracks for their new project.

“When we were done with the script,” Ethan says, “the first person we sent it to was T-Bone Burnett. We just started talking with him about the repertoire, what everybody would play.”

The character of Davis is loosely inspired by Dave Van Ronk, a folk singer whose memoir The Mayor Of

Inside Llewyn Davis written and directed by Joel and

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Ethan Coen, with Oscar Isaac, Carey Mulligan, Justin Timberlake and John Goodman. A Mongrel Media release.

105 minutes. Opens Friday (December 20). For venues and times, see Movies, page 76.

Joel and Ethan Coen have made movies in many different genres – comedies, dramas, thrillers, even a Western. They’ve won Oscars with Fargo and No Country For Old Men, given us the cult classics Raising Arizona and The Big Lebowski, and generally never made the same picture twice.

Their new project, Inside Llewyn Davis, is different again. It’s a musical, sort of, following a struggling folk singer (Oscar Isaac) through a few days of personal and professional turmoil in 1961 New York.

The subject matter is new, but the central notion of a character stubbornly adhering to a personal code tracks straight through the Coens’ filmography, all the way back to Nicolas Cage’s weirdly noble H.I. McDunnough in Raising Arizona. The Coens make movies about people who insist on pushing back against the world.

“That’s the accurate description, maybe,” Joel says over the phone from New York City, where the brothers are snowed in. ‘Out of sync with the world’ – or not necessarily even [that] so much as their own way of being in the world that prevents them from meshing with it in a more constructive or successful way. He certainly

Joel and Ethan Coen

review INSIDE LLEWYN

ñDAVIS (Joel and Ethan Coen) Rating: NNNN Joel and Ethan Coen’s portrait of a struggling folksinger in 1961 New York City plays as ­comedy, musical and drama all at once, its tone steered by Oscar Isaac’s soulful inter­ pretations of tradi­ tional folk songs that somehow manage to reflect precisely what his character, itinerant troubadour Llewyn Davis, is feeling in the moment.

Beautifully realized and packed with delightful incidents (the recording of Please Mr. Kennedy is probably the most satisfying three minutes you’ll spend in a movie theatre this year), Inside Llewyn Davis understands its characters in a way few movies do, giving Isaac and co-stars Justin Timberlake, John Goodman, Adam Driver and F. Murray Abraham much more to sink their teeth into more than folk scene clichés.

Carey Mulligan sounds the only false note as an antagonistic friend of Llewyn’s; someone really needs to tell her she can’t act and maintain an American accent at the same time. Fortunately, she doesn’t have enough screen time to do any real damage, and the film bounces back to life whenever her character slams the door in its hero’s face.

NW

OSCAR BUZZ In a perfect world, the movie about Llewyn Davis would be far more successful than its subject, with nominations for picture, director, original screenplay, actor for Oscar Isaac), supporting actor nominations for both Justin Timberlake and John Goodman, film editing, cinematography and original song for Please Mr. Kennedy. Yes, seriously.

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= Critic’s Pick nnnnn = Top ten of the year nnnn = Honourable

mention nnn = Entertaining nn = Mediocre n = Bomb

Watch the concert film, Another Day, Another Time : Celebrating the Music of ‘Inside Llewyn Davis’ —On

DEC 20TH - EXCLUSIVE AT

55 BLOOR WEST AT BAY · MANULIFE CENTRE • 416-961-6303

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DEC 25TH - NOW PLAYING

55 BLOOR WEST AT BAY · MANULIFE CENTRE • 416-961-6303

Check theatre directories for showtimes

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REITMAN SQUARE, 350 KING STREET WEST

MongrelMedia

1025 The Queensway • 416-503-0424

@MongrelMedia

5095 YONGE STREET • 416-223-9550

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NOW december 19-25 2013

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cover story interview

Ben Stiller

The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty

three ben stillers – movie star, serious actor and filmmaker – come together in this ambitious dram e The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty irected by Ben Stiller, written by Steve d Conrad from the story by James Thurber, with Stiller, Kristen Wiig, Shirley MacLaine and Sean Penn. A 20th Century Fox release. 114 minutes. Opens Wednesday (December 25). For venues and times, see Movies, page 76.

Ben Stiller movies do well at the holidays.

All three Meet The Parents movies and the first Night At The Museum opened at Christmas – and did really, really well. Audiences love watching Stiller suffer the indignities of awkward family situations, especially when he’s being humiliated by Robert De Niro or being tied up by a wee legion of Roman soldiers.

This year, 20th Century Fox, the studio behind the Night At The Museum series, is releasing another sort of Stiller film: The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty. And Stiller, who directs as well as stars, is trying something a little new.

“I felt like I was going into an area, just in terms of the tone of the movie, that was different than I had done be­fore,” he says over the phone from New York City, peppering his speech with “you knows” and “sort ofs” in much the same way Greg Focker does.

“It had some familiar elements, but really at the end of the day, I felt

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december 19-25 2013 NOW

review

like the criteria with which I was judging this story – by an audience’s interest – was not just gonna be the laughs.”

Over the last two decades, Stiller has established three different career tracks for himself.

There’s Ben Stiller the movie star, who makes smashes like those Focker films and There’s Something About Mary, monster hits that pay the bills but don’t necessarily allow him to stretch his muscles. He’s also done fairly well for himself as Alex the lion in the Madagascar movies.

There’s Ben Stiller the ambitious actor who takes real dramatic risks, the guy Steven Spielberg cast in a small role in Empire Of The Sun, who starred in David O. Russell’s farce Flirting With Disaster and did great character turns in Zero Effect and Permanent Midnight and The Royal Tenenbaums. Most recently, that guy played the title role in Noah Baumbach’s Greenberg, in which he shared a stunningly uncomfortable – and painfully honest – love scene with Greta Gerwig.

And then there’s Ben Stiller the film­maker, who produces an eclectic slate of movies under his Red Hour Films shingle – everything from the horror movie The Ruins to Richard Ayoade’s directorial debut, Submarine – and directs the occasional project like Reality Bites and Zoolander and Tropic Thunder, often casting

THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY (Ben Stiller) Rating: NNN The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty finds Ben Stiller – who directs as well as stars – trying for something a little more substantial than he has in movies like Zoolander and Tropic Thunder. He uses James Thurber’s short story about a daydreamer to explore loneliness and the need for human connection in the increasingly disconnected digital age.

Stiller’s Mitty is a photo archivist at Life Magazine who after decades of simple competence launches himself on a global adventure in search of a missing image for the magazine’s final issue. The movie disappears into Walter’s imagination in a series of clever set pieces, but the real world is always more important, Stuart Dry­burgh’s cinematography growing more and more beautiful as the film progresses.

The narrative’s a little bumpy – the story basically stops and backs up over itself so it can have a third act – but Stiller’s ambition and low-key charisma will hold you. He’s aiming at something meaningful here, and even if his movie doesn’t totally get there, NW the journey is the thing.

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himself in the goofiest role.

I first met Stiller in 1994, before the personae splintered.

He was developing an adaptation of Scott Smith’s thriller A Simple Plan starring Nicolas Cage. I was a big fan of the book, and of Stiller’s brilliant, short-lived sketch series The Ben Still­ er Show, so when we ended up in the same Manhattan hotel lobby, I just went over and talked to him for a few minutes.

Stiller never made A Simple Plan.

The project went into turnaround and was eventually brought to the screen

by Sam Raimi in 1999, with Bill Paxton in the role Cage would have played.

“Yeah, I really wanted to make that movie,” Stiller says. “It would have been a great experience. I don’t know if the movie would have been great,” he laughs, “but it would have been a great experience.”

I think the movie would have been pretty good. Stiller’s always been a thoughtful filmmaker. Reality Bites is much more complex than you remember, The Cable Guy is a remarkably pointed media satire, and Tropic Thunder even more so: the conversation between Stiller’s and Robert Downey Jr.’s characters about “going full retard” is one of the sharpest indictments of Hollywood’s two-faced handling of the disabled ever put on film.

Walter Mitty is the first movie in which Stiller has used all three aspects of himself. He gets to be a movie star, a

= Critic’s Pick nnnnn = Top ten of the year nnnn = Honourable mention nnn = Entertaining nn = Mediocre n = Bomb

OPENS DEC 25

OSCAR BUZZ

Ben Stiller (left) and Sean Penn are ready for their close-ups.

EDY

This year’s competition will likely prove too strong for Mitty to squeeze through, but nominations for cinematography and best visual effects might be possible if the Academy’s technical divisions pay close attention.

By NORMAN WILNER

serious-minded actor and a technically savvy director all at once – and not in a comedy.

“Following that story of Walter getting to where he gets to was maybe a little more open and less cynical than I [expected], as I made the film,” he says. “And as a filmmaker, I definitely want to make different kinds of movies, and not necessarily comedies. I’ve talked about that for years, but this might be a kind of first step toward doing that, in terms of just...

I’m ready to take some chances in worlds that are pretty much foreign to me.”

Walter Mitty is definitely new territory.

Sure, it has a few scenes in Stiller’s comfort zone. In addition to a deft riff on the inherent ickiness of The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button, Walter’s flights of fantasy take the form of action movie sequences shot with an intensity that rivals the climax of The Matrix. But mostly it’s a movie about human beings, loneliness and the search for connection in a world that’s moving forward too quickly.

James Thurber’s 1939 short story is a charming study of a henpecked man who escapes his mundane life in fantasies where he casts himself as a charismatic, confident hero. The story was adapted into a Danny Kaye vehicle in 1947, and Hollywood has been trying to remake it since the 1990s. Among the actors attached to

play the lead were Jim Carrey, Owen Wilson, Sacha Baron Cohen – and Stiller, who was first approached after Carrey dropped out.

“I got a script, a different draft, about eight years ago,” he says. “To me, it was trying to be a remake of the original movie without music in it. I just didn’t connect with it, and I didn’t feel I could really improve on the musical comedy that Danny Kaye did. There’s just no way to compare to that.”

About five years later, a draft by Steve Conrad reached Stiller, a fan of Conrad’s The Weather Man, an underrated drama starring Nicolas Cage as a Chicago media personality living in the shadow of his author father.

Conrad had added new elements to the story that resonated with him.

“Steve and I sat down for about nine months together and did lots of different drafts,” he says. “We talked about a lot of different ideas and tried many different things.”

One new wrinkle gives Mitty a job as a photo technician and archivist at Life Magazine. When we meet him, he’s working with physical film at a print publication, making him seem even more like a man out of time.

“I think that’s something Steve was interested in, and to me it felt very relevant and modern,” Stiller says.

“There’s something in this sort of changeover from analog to digital….

It’s a lack of respect for, you know, for the history of things. And whether it’s people’s [personal] history – doing something, doing a job – or even just the history of the magazine and all that, it’s almost like a side effect of the changeover that’s going on.”

Energized by the challenge of Walter Mitty, Stiller signed on for another project with Noah Baumbach: While We’re Young, which comes out next year.

“Yeah, I just finished that with Noah,” he says. “You know, that’s actually more of a comedy for Noah than he’s done in a while. I guess Frances Ha has a lightness about it, too, but this one is as light as anything he’s done.”

The premise follows the friendship between two couples – one in their 40s, and the other in their 20s. Having just turned 48 last month, and working in an industry that feeds on youth, Stiller could certainly relate.

“He’s sort of exploring where that puts people our age at this point, and how they respond to where everything’s going, and how you hang on to that. I’m really looking forward to seeing it. Naomi Watts is my wife, and Adam Driver and Amanda Seyfried are the younger couple. It was very fun to do.”

While We’re Young will maintain his indie cred, but bills have to be paid, so….

“I am doing a third Night At The Museum, starting at the end of January. The end of the innocence,” he says, laughing. “That’s not what it’s called, but for me it’ll be the final one.”

3 normw@nowtoronto.com | @wilnervision

TOP 5 BEN STILLER PERFORMANCES

Ben Stiller has worked in many different genres, played a lot of very strange characters and created some extremely memorable screen moments with nothing but hair gel. (Okay, it wasn’t hair gel.) These are his five finest roles – with apologies to Zero Effect’s Steve Arlo, Permanent Midnight’s Jerry Stahl, Mystery Men’s Mr. Furious, Zoolander’s Derek Zoolander and Tropic Thunder’s Tugg Speedman.

1

Roger Greenberg, GREENBERG (2010) Noah Baumbach’s character study gave Stiller the role of his career in the misanthropic, miserable Roger Greenberg, who comes to Los Angeles after a breakdown in New York City and almost immediately ends up in a complicated almost-relationship with his absent brother’s assistant (Greta Gerwig), who has issues of her own. Stiller establishes Roger’s torment in quick, efficient strokes, then mines desperate laughs from his darkest impulses. The uncomfortable flashes of comedy make the performance feel even more unpredictable and electric.

2

4

3

Jerry, YOUR FRIENDS & NEIGHBORS (1998) Barely a month after There’s Something About Mary made him a household name, Stiller turned up in Neil LaBute’s withering comedy of manners alongside Jason Patric, Amy Brenneman, Catherine Keener, Aaron Eckhart and Nastassja Kinski. He’s distressingly convincing as a pompous theatre professor trapped in an unhappy marriage (to Keener) and lusting after a friend’s wife (Brenneman). Jerry’s first scene – an excruciatingly on-the-nose performance of a foppish role from a Restoration-era farce – tells us everything we need to know about the character’s selfabsorption, and why he ended up teaching instead of NW acting.

Chas Tenenbaum, THE ROYAL TENENBAUMS (2001) The most outwardly successful and well-adjusted member of the Tenenbaum clan, Chas spends much the movie on the verge of falling apart; his wife has left him, and the anger over his broken marriage is coming out in strange ways. Wes Anderson cast Stiller – who’d befriended co-writer Owen Wilson after seeing him in Anderson’s Bottle Rocket – because he knew Stiller could channel Chas’s anger in interesting ways, and it paid off beautifully.

White Goodman, DODGEBALL: AN UNDERDOG STORY (2004) Ever since the days of his sketch show, Stiller’s had a fondness for ridiculous character parts, and his finest hour came as the sneering, self-aware heel of Rawson Marshall Thurber’s goofy sports comedy. The gleeful malice Stiller pours into the character – and the open contempt he has for Vince Vaughn’s ostensible hero in every scene – becomes one of the best running gags in a movie filled with weird, charming character beats. (Stiller also faced off against Vaughn that summer in Anchorman, popping up as Latino broadcaster Arturo Mendes in the movie’s big rumble scene.)

Ted, THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY (1998) The hapless hero of Peter and Bobby Farrelly’s blockbuster comedy set the template for Stiller’s lucrative career playing likeable but insecure (and frequently humiliated) leading men. But what everyone misses about Mary is how deftly Stiller incorporates the script’s unpleasant psychological undercurrents. In a world where everyone is compelled to stalk Cameron Diaz’s innocent heroine, Ted is just the guy who’s best at repressing that urge.

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NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

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NOW PLAYING

WRITER/ACTOR INTERVIEW

WILL FERRELL

REVIEW ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES (Adam McKay) Rating: NNN With its “The Legend Continues” subtitle and grandiose voice-overs, a self-consciously epic quality hangs over.

Adam McKay and Will Ferrell’s script unfolds like a remix of the original. Instead of rival local news gangs, Burgundy’s news team squares off against a slick prime-time host played by a grinning James Marsden. The

Will Ferrell gets verklempt with Christina Applegate in Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues.

ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES

THE PUBLICITY-SHY WILL FERRELL DISCUSSES HIS FOOT-IN-MOUTH ALTER EGO, RON BURGUNDY, AND ALL THE JOKES THAT WERE LEFT ON THE CUTTING-ROOM FLOOR By JOHN SEMLEY ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES directed by Adam McKay, written by Will Ferrell and McKay, with Ferrell, Paul Rudd, Steve Carell, David Koechner and Christina Applegate.

A Paramount Pictures release. 118 minutes. Now playing. For venues and times, see Movies, page 76.

Will Ferrell does a couple of things really well.

One: he plays terrific assholes. Think of the hardpressed father on SNL battling with his family over supper (“You don’t talk to me like that! I am a division manager! People are scared of me!”), the villainous Mugatu in Zoolander, or embodiment of evil Ashley Schaeffer, the drawling BMW salesman on HBO’s Eastbound & Down.

He’s also a consummate man-child, his Everyman charm and forgiving, schlubby physique investing characters in Step Brothers, Talladega Nights and Semi-Pro with a humanity they might not otherwise communicate.

Ron Burgundy, the preening newsman Ferrell brings out of retirement in the long-awaited Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues, occupies the intersection of both these types. He’s the prick who’s also the nice guy, the asshole who always seems to mean well.

“Ron is always sticking his foot in his mouth,” says Ferrell on the phone during the film’s publicity tour.

“But it’s really a function of his insecurity. That’s what audiences kind of connect with. He’s kind of a sweet character even though, if you look on paper at the things he’s saying, it’s, like, ‘Uh….’ With a different actor or a different performance, it might be construed differently.”

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While this sort of character has become boringly de Fantana (Paul Rudd), Brick Tamland (Steve Carell) and rigueur in contemporary comedy (see Curb Your EnChamp Kind (David Koechner) – are hanging thusiasm’s Larry David, Eastbound & Down’s Kenny around improvising through period mousPowers, the diminishing returns of the Hangover taches. trilogy), Ferrell manages to keep Burgundy from On-set improvising for the original seeming like a warmed-over rehash of a character Anchorman yielded enough material for a we’ve seen many times before (and certainly 100 whole other film – the direct-to-DVD times since the original Anchorman). spiritual sequel Wake Up, Ron Burgundy: It helps that he and co-writer/director Adam McThe Lost Movie, a 93-minute film assembled Kay seem to take pleasure in punishing entirely from footage swept up Burgundy in a their new sequel, which from the cutting-room floor. sends him spiralling to new lows.

With Anchorman 2, because Anchorman 2 even contains an exof digital technology, there tended sequence where Burwas no worry about gundy goes blind and exiles wasting film, which himself to a seaside lightmeant a first cut house like a maritime that clocked in at Howard Hughes. three and a half “I was driving one hours. day, and I called Adam “Adam has an and said, ‘Shouldn’t Ron alternative cut,” go blind?’” Ferrell exexplains Ferrell. “It plains. “And Adam said, follows the same ‘Absolutely he should!’ That’s storyline, but all the how we work. We think of the jokes are flipped out. So bullet points and then worry there are 230 new jokes about how to get there.” just based on the improv.

It’s that sort of lackadaisical approach That’s something to look forward to plotting that defines Anchorman 2, to.”

3 johns@nowtoronto.com | @johnsemley3000 just as it did the original. Like its 2004 predecessor, Anchorman 2 is always more online most itself when its core foursome – the Read the extended Anchorman 2 Steve Carell’s Brick review at nowtoronto.com/movies powerhouse news team of Burgundy, Brian Tamland is back for more broad broadcast laughs.

recycling of old gags and ceaseless string of cameos (Drake, Kanye, Jim Carrey, Tina Fey, Liam Neeson, a minotaur, Will Smith, etc) strain, coming across as too eager and desperate to please.

That there’s (plenty) more of the same isn’t necessarily a bad thing, especially for Anchorman diehards. Like its predecessor, Anchorman 2 is most itself when its stars goof around with one another. It’s a shame the film expends so much energy and calls in so many favours trying to imitate the original – a film that at its best seemed to be making it up as it went along. JS

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American Hustle

now playing

despite comparisons to Goodfellas and boogie nights, David o. russell’s latest is an incoherent, overacted mess By NORMAN WILNER

American Hustle directed by David O. Russell, written by Eric Warren Singer and Russell, with Christian Bale, Amy Adams, Bradley Cooper, ­Jennifer Lawrence and Jeremy Renner. An Entertainment One release. 138 minutes. Opens Friday (December 20). For venues and times, see Movies, page 76. Rating: NN

American Hustle is nominally a story about the barely remembered Abscam sting, in which the FBI used a small-time con artist to snare politicians on bribery and corruption charges, mostly revolving around the redevelopment of Atlantic City. But the plot is incidental to the shouting.

David O. Russell is all about the ­shouting.

Encouraged by the still not entirely explicable praise thrown at The Fighter and Silver Linings Playbook, Russell has fully embraced the notion that drama only exists when ­characters are yelling at one another in mid-shots. Here they’re doing it in 70s wardrobe and hairstyles, which ­apparently makes American Hustle a withering social satire, too – though, as with The Fighter and Silver Linings Playbook, I never really felt like I was in on the joke.

The actors are certainly having a blast.

Christian Bale, with an elaborate comb-over and a bloated gut that looks like it holds all the weight he lost for The Fighter, is the con artist, jabbering scammer Irving Rosenfeld;

Joaquin Phoenix falls in love with his computer’s OS and also wears high-waisted pants.

Her

spike jonze’s sci-fi romance melds aspects of 2001: a space odyssey and annie hall... really By NORMAN WILNER

Her written and directed by Spike Jonze, with Joaquin

ñ

Phoenix, ­Rooney Mara, Amy Adams and Scarlett Johansson. A Warner Bros. release. 125 minutes. Now playing. For venues and times, see Movies, page 76. Rating: NNNN

On the most basic narrative level, Her is science fiction.

It’s set in the very near future, in a Los Angeles with barely any cars, the buildings connected by skywalks people ac­tual­ly use. Computers no longer have keyboards, just voice commands and holographic interfaces. Video games interact with you. You tell your phone to play a melancholy song and it knows almost exactly what you mean.

In this future, you can install an operating system on your PC that’s basically an artificial intelligence – which means it can adjust itself specifically to your needs. And instead of triggering the rise of Skynet, it falls in love with you.

That’s what Spike Jonze’s fascinating new movie is about: love. When the emotionally withdrawn Theodore Twombley (Joaquin Phoenix) in­stalls that operating system – which names itself Samantha and is voiced with perfect perky opacity by Scarlett Johansson – his only intention is to set up his computer.

But then his computer asks him questions, laughs at his jokes and treats him as the most interesting person in the world. Of course, he’s drawn to it – to her. Why wouldn’t he be? She’s perfect for him. She just doesn’t, you know, exist in the phy­si­cal realm.

Jonze presents this imagined world as utterly ordinary.

The tech is just there, like the redeveloped Los Angeles; we aren’t encouraged to mar­vel at it, just to accept it and focus on the story.

It’s as wide-open and genuine as his adaptation of Where The Wild Things Are, though not as emotional­ly raw. This is a movie where people process their feelings rather than release them, and that may make viewers uncomfortable – especially in a sequence where Samantha tries to make her relationship with Theodore more decisively physical.

Love is simple, but love is also complicated.

Her is essentially a story about how technology can facilitate a relationship over impossible distances, and what happens when one partner evolves more quickly than the other. In the end, it’s as beholden to Annie Hall as it is to 2001, and don’t think that isn’t the strangest sentence I’ve written this year.

3

OSCAR BUZZ Spike Jonze’s movies rarely catch on with the Academy, so I’d be surprised if Her rated anything more than a nomination for original screenplay. But with any luck, voters won’t be able to resist nominating Scarlett Johansson for supporting actress to make a statement: it’d be the first time an actor has been nominated for a voice-over performance, and she totally deserves it. (Joaquin Phoenix certainly merits an actor nod as well, but I think the odds are against him.)

december 19-25 2013 NOW

Given the way the Academy showered The Fighter and Silver Linings Playbook with nominations, it seems likely they’ll fall for David O. Russell’s latest, too. Expect picture, director, original screenplay, actor for Christian Bale, actress for Amy Adams and supporting spots for Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence. It’s their own fault, really.

Amy Adams, also from The Fighter, plays his lover and partner, Sydney Prosser, with big hair and a fondness for open-chested tops.

Oh, and look! There’s Jennifer Lawrence doing much the same thing she did in Silver Linings, as the mercurial, argumentative woman to whom Rosenfeld is actually married, and there’s Bradley Cooper, popeyed and pleading, as the dipshit FBI agent who ropes everyone into the circus in the first place.

As with every movie Russell has made since I Heart Huckabees, people race around shouting about their ambitions and desires, and whoever shouts the loudest is the person with whom we’re supposed to sympathize. Some people love this strategy; I find it exhausting and pointless – especially in the second half, when scenes seem to exist because Russell had noticed that Bale and Lawrence’s characters hadn’t yelled at each other in a while.

American Hustle is being compared to GoodFellas (because crime) and Boogie Nights (because sideboob, I guess). Let’s throttle back on that and see it for what it is: another incoherent, overacted mess from Russell. 3 normw@nowtoronto.com | @wilnervision

Jennifer Lawrence does the same thing she did in Silver Linings Playbook. So expect an Oscar nomination.

opens dec 20

Amy Adams and Christian Bale let it all hang out in American Hustle.

normw@nowtoronto.com | @wilnervision

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= Critic’s Pick nnnnn = Top ten of the year nnnn = Honourable mention nnn = Entertaining nn = Mediocre n = Bomb

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OPENS DEC 25

MANDELA: LONG WALK TO FREEDOM

EVEN WITH ITS EPIC LENGTH AND FINE CENTRAL PERFORMANCE, THIS FILM ABOUT THE LATE FREEDOM FIGHTER FAILS TO DO HIM JUSTICE By SUSAN G. COLE

Idris Elba (left) and Riaad Moosa take the Long Walk To Freedom.

MANDELA: LONG WALK TO FREEDOM directed by Justin Chadwick, written by William Nicholson from Nelson Mandela’s autobiography, with Idris Elba, Naomie Harris and Terry Pheto. 141 minutes. An eOne release. Opens Wednesday (December 25).

For venues and times, see Movies, page 76.

Rating: NNN

A titan like the late Nelson Mandela deserves better than this by-the-numbers biopic. But how can a single film do justice to the man?

Justin Chadwick tries to solve the problem of portraying events that take place over 95 years by leaving out Mandela’s childhood entirely and ending

the film when he’s released from prison after being incarcerated for 27 years. Barely two minutes are given to his election as South Africa’s first black president, and none to his regime.

But streamlining all these events forces the writer into cli-

gale, Barry Cook). 87 minutes. Opens Friday (December 20). For venues and times, see Movies, page 76. Rating: NN

In Walking With Dinosaurs, a lesson on the late Cretaceous period that panders to the iCarly generation, prehistoric monsters dish out lines like “You are about to get served.”

Co-directors Neil Nightingale (from BBC Earth) and Barry Cook (an old hand at Disney) collaborate on this peppy adventure for kids that has the accuracy of a nature doc. The promotional material calls it “groundbreaking.”

Justin Long gives a broad reading as the voice of Patchi, a young Patchasomething who must endure the winter migration while staying clear of deadly mini-T-Rex-like creatures called

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This is an exceptionally strong year for the best actor category, but it’s quite possible that Idris Elba – who recently copped a Golden Globe nom – could pick up a nomination for his uncanny turn as Nelson Mandela. And it’s not out of the question that the script could get a nod in the best adapted screenplay category.

susanc@nowtoronto.com | @susangcole

OPENS DEC 20

WALKING WITH DINOSAURS WALKING WITH DINOSAURS (Neil Nightin-

OSCAR BUZZ

chés. Yes, to keep fit and focused, the ex-boxer does pushups in his prison cell, for example. And telling the story in chronological order gives the whole thing a plodding quality. It also strikes me as lazy.

To grasp what’s going on, you need some background – something audiences now have via the tributes in the wake of Mandela’s death. Still, the politics remain confusing. You’re never sure who’s fighting whom or why, especially when the conflict is between blacks. And the context of activist wife Winnie’s promotion of violence against black collaborators is never made clear, even though the political tension between the rage-driven Winnie and the reconciliation-oriented Nelson is a focal point.

To screenwriter William Nicholson’s credit, he does pay some attention to Mandela’s reputation as a young womanizer. And he even gives credence to the idea that the sainted Madiba knocked his first wife around. These flaws are, of course, eclipsed by the portrait of a politically gifted leader, but Long Walk To Freedom can’t be called pure hagiography.

And Idris Elba, Golden Globenominated and likely to get an Oscar nod, is a knockout. Yes, he had a good makeup artist slathering away, but in life he’s nothing like Mandela in stature – he’s much taller just for starters. Yet Elba carries his body and tilts his head in ways that show Mandela’s transformation from arrogant barrister without a cause to inspiring leader willing to sacrifice everything in his quest for his people’s freedom.

3

gorgonzolas, or something like that – the lesson didn’t stick.

These dinos may not be familiar to the average Jurassic Park fan, but everything else about the movie certainly is. The educational mandate doesn’t get much of an assist from attempts at thrills, gags and romance so old and decayed they’re fossilized.

A few stunning vistas come alive in 3D, but the dinosaurs can’t shake that cartoonish sheen that afflicts most recent CGI/live action mixes.

Even Spielberg’s 20-year-old animatronics had more texture than the dinosaurs on display here, and his movie was definitely a helluva lot more fun.

Jurassic Park was groundbreaking.

Walking With Dinosaurs doesn’t even leave a footprint.

These fake-looking dinosaurs don’t walk, they stumble.

RADHEYAN SIMONPILLAI

Ñ

= Critic’s Pick NNNNN = Top ten of the year NNNN = Honourable mention NNN = Entertaining NN = Mediocre N = Bomb

EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENT – NOW PLAYING Documentarian Lucy Walker (Waste Land) directs this intimate portrait of former pro snowboarder Kevin Pearce as he struggles to recover from his debilitating 2009 training accident and return to the slopes.

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opens dec 20

Laura Dekker’s solo sail around the world makes for a remarkable story.

MAIDENTRIP MAIDENTRIP (Jillian Schlesinger). 82 minutes. Some subtitles. Opens Friday (December 20). For venues and times, see Movies, page 76. Rating: NNNN

ñ

Most 14-year-olds obsess about dating, pimples and weekend plans. But Holland’s Laura Dekker decided to

take two years off to sail around the world alone, attempting to become the youngest person ever to do so.

It seems like a reckless goal, and in fact the Dutch government tried to stop her. But Dekker comes by her sea legs honestly. She was born on a boat in New Zealand when her parents were in the midst of their own nautical world trip. After they divorced, she was raised by her father, most of their time together spent re-

opens dec 20

Richard Dormer (center) enjoys the Good V ­ ibrations.

Good Vibrations Good Vibrations (Lisa Barros

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D’Sa, Glenn Leyburn). 101 minutes.

Opens Friday (December 20). For venues and times, see Movies, page 76. Rating:

NNNN

In the 1970s, when Northern Ireland was tearing itself apart, Terri Hooley decided to open a record shop in Belfast. To enter, you had to love music and be willing to leave your politics at the door.

It mostly worked.

Good Vibrations is a manic, joyous dramatization of this story from directors Lisa Barros D’Sa and

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pairing boats and sailing.

When Dekker set out in August 2010, there was no follow boat or support team. Her only companion was a video camera, footage of which director Jillian Schlesinger has edited effec­tively. Schlesinger also uses graphics, old family photos (for backstory) and scenes where Dekker has disembarked to visit countries and make friends with strangers.

It all adds up to a remarkable story about an independent, resourceful young woman whose psychological motivations aren’t as important as her spirit and fearlessness. There’s no editorializing when she’s more moved by a seafaring couple she meets on her journey than when she sees her own parents.

And a scene where she’s irritat­ed by a Dutch journalist goes u ­ nexplored.

Along with the great footage of vast oceans (there’s some rough weather), it’s fascinating to see not just Dekker’s physical transformation but also her evolving ideas of home and nationality. GLENN SUMI

Glenn Leyburn, starring Richard Dormer in an ­ingratiating turn as the effervescent Hooley and Jodie Whittaker as his mostly supportive bride, Ruth.

Colin Carberry and Glenn Patterson’s script doesn’t have much time for the politics of the era; the proudly apolitical Hooley had a habit of throwing himself into each new venture – opening Good Vibrations, managing and recording various Irish punk bands, producing and releasing the Undertones’s era-defining single Teenage Kicks – without asking whether he was working with Catholics or Protestants.

This is the story of a man so in love with music that he dedicated himself to spreading it, and changed the culture around him as a result. So, yes, it’s more or less an Irish version of 24 Hour Party People. That film’s director, ­Michael Winterbottom, is credited as an executive producer.

You should consider that an enNorman Wilner dorsement.

opens dec 20

Nicholas Winton helped ­rescue almost 700 Jewish children from German-­occupied Czechoslovakia.

NICKY’S FAMILY NICKY’S FAMILY (Matej Minac). 97 ­ inutes. Some subtitles. Opens Friday m (December 20) at the Kingsway. See Times, page 81. Rating: NNN

Sir Nicholas Winton (or Nicky, as he’s ­affectionately called here) masterminded the evacuation of almost 700 Jewish children from German-occupied Czechoslovakia before the Holocaust.

Winton’s heroics warrant a Hollywood-grade biopic, especially con­­sider­ing that his remarkable story ­includes a sexy Nazi spy and moments both thrilling and gutwrenching. He’s been dubbed “Britain’s Schindler.”

However, instead of the Spielberg treatment, Nicky’s Family gives Winton something more like a Heritage Minute, complete with kitschy, misbegotten­re-enactments.

It’s best to ignore those utterly

unnecessary segments and just listen to the heartfelt memories of Winton and his rescued children – now seniors. Together they ­chronicle the compli­cated work of finding refuges with families in ­Britain and the children’s experience of being torn from their own parents, who eventually experienced the worst of Hitler.

A more talented filmmaker could have made something special out of the man’s extraordinary efforts, which were unknown to the survivors and even to Winton’s wife until she dis­covered a scrapbook with clues and started asking questions.

Instead, this stagey doc seems to do everything in its power to dull down its story, particularly in a 25-minute epilogue where everyone – not just the survivors but ­random journalists, students and volunteers – pats Winton on the back for a job well done.

Focusing on the story is a tribute. Focusing on the tributes is ­excessive.

RADHEYAN SIMONPILLAI

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The Wolf Of Wall Street (D: Martin Scorsese, 180 min) Leonardo DiCaprio, Jonah Hill, Jon Favreau and others star in Martin Scorsese’s epic look at the true story of Jordan Belfort, who rose from modest origins to become an insanely rich, corrupt stockbroker.

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Robert De Niro and Sylvester Stallone, who you’ll remember both starred in Oscar-​winning boxing films, reunite to play aging rivals who come out of retirement for one last bout.

47 Ronin (D: Carl Rinsch, 118 min)

Keanu Reeves stars in this action-​adventure pic about 47 samurai warriors (Reeves, um, plays a “half-​breed”) who fight supernatural forces that killed their master.

Justin Bieber’s Believe (D: Jon M. Chu, 92 min) The Biebs, his manager, Scooter Braun, producer Ryan Good and celebs like Usher and Will I Am take part in this backstage look at the Stratford, Ontario, native’s rise to stardom.

All four movies open Wednesday (December 25). Embargoed or no press screening – see reviews from December 24 onwards at ­nowtoronto.com/movies.

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Playing this week PRESENTS

How to find a listing

Movie listings are comprehensive and organized alphabetically. Listings include name of film, director’s name in brackets, a review, running time and a rating.

Reviews are by Norman Wilner (NW), Susan G. Cole (SGC), Glenn Sumi (GS), John Semley (JS) and Radheyan Simonpillai (RS) unless otherwise specified.

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Michael Hollett ........................................................................@m_hollett Alice Klein ....................................................................................@aliceklein Susan G. Cole ..........................................................................@susangcole Enzo DiMatteo ............................................................. @enzodimatteo Norm Wilner .....................................................................@wilnervision Glenn Sumi ............................................................................... @glennsumi Julia LeConte .......................................................................@julialeconte AT Steven ONLY Davey ......................................................@stevendaveynow REITMAN SQUARE, 350 KING STREET WEST Life & Style..............................................................................@nowlifestyle John Semley ........................................................@johnsemley3000 Ben Spurr .........................................................................................@benspurr Jonathan Goldsbie .................................................................@goldsbie Adria Vasil .................................................................... @ecoholicnation OFFICIAL SUPPLIER

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Curtis’s sappy, what-a-wonderful-world romantic comedies, only now the goofy guy (Domnhall Gleeson) who falls for a lovely American (Rachel McAdams) has the ability to travel back within his own lifetime to do things over as he sees fit.

The gimmick gives Curtis’s sappiest, cheesiest impulses free rein. 123 min. NN (NW) Interchange 30, SilverCity Mississauga, Yonge & Dundas 24

Julia LeConte ................................................@julialeconte Steven Davey ...............................@stevendaveynow Life & Style.......................................................@nowlifestyle John Semley .................................@johnsemley3000 Ben Spurr ..................................................................@benspurr Jonathan Goldsbie ..........................................@goldsbie

(J.C. Chandor) may not break new cinematic ground for the survival thriller in the way Gravity does, but it doesn’t have to; it’s just one hell of a good movie, starring Robert Redford as a sailor trying to steer his damaged boat to rescue. Chandor’s intimate, immediate ­direction puts us right there with him for every second of it. 106 min. NNNN (NW) Canada Square

American Hustle (David O. Russell) 138 min. See review, page 70. NN (NW) Opens Dec 20 at Beach Cinemas, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Humber Cinemas, Queens­ way, Rainbow Market Square, Rainbow Woodbine, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Yonge, Varsity, Yonge & Dundas 24 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues

(Adam McKay) 118 min. See interview and review, page 68. NNN (JS) 401 & Morningside, Beach Cinemas, Carlton Cinema, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum ­Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Humber Cinemas, Queensway, Rainbow Market Square, Rainbow Promenade, Rainbow Woodbine, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Yonge, SilverCity Yorkdale, Yonge & Dundas 24

André Gregory: Before and After ­Dinner (Cindy Kleine) is an absorbing but

shapeless documentary about avantgarde theatre artist Gregory, who’s probably best known for the 1981 art house smash My Dinner With André. Now in his late 70s, with an aristocratic air, seductive voice and mischievous spark, he’s a witty raconteur who continues to push theatrical boundaries. Kleine has lots of access because she’s also Gregory’s wife; they met when she was 39 and he was 63. So she captures him in rehearsals, goofing around the house and, in one of the film’s

more intriguing threads, Skyping with scholars to see if his European, upper-class Jewish family once collaborated with Nazis before emigrating to America. ­Gregory is self-aware and candid enough to consider how his ambivalent feelings about his parents have affected his approach to making art. But Kleine’s musings about her own family are less compelling, and she doesn’t call her husband on the fact that his inherited wealth contributed to his artistic freedom. 108 min. NNN (GS) Carlton Cinema

Antisocial (Cody Calahan) is another

zombie movie – shot in Guelph and Toronto – about a group of friends whose New Year’s Eve house party goes to hell when a mysterious rage plague breaks out around the world. Could the strangely ­addictive, not-at-all-like-Facebook site TheSocialRedroom.com have anything to do with it? Writer/director Calahan seems to think he’s breaking new ground with the social-media angle, but it’s basically just warmed-over Romero and Raimi with one really nifty visual concept (with which, sadly, nothing is ever done) and a third act that’s both dull and ridiculous. A sequel is promised. Swell. 90 min. NN (NW) Carlton Cinema

The Best Man Holiday (Malcolm D. Lee) is like the Christmas dinner that starts off with laughs and high spirits but keeps dragging along until you can’t hold down the eggnog. This sequel to 1999’s The Best Man is an overstuffed turkey. The itinerary for this holiday weekend includes the typical sex, secrets and scandals, followed by a rah-rah football game, a shamelessly dour cameo by the Grim Reaper and a ­climactic visit from the stork. There’s enough material to last until Easter. The schmaltzy, contrived sub-dramas clamour for attention, but none warrant a kleenex despite the best efforts of a mostly fine ensemble cast. They do much better with the gags and camaraderie in the early ­goings. Terrence Howard is the gift that keeps on giving as the chronic bachelor who drops the best zingers, including one that could describe the whole movie: “That was some melodramatic shit.” 120 min. NN (RS) 401 & Morningside, Coliseum Scarborough, Courtney Park 16 Black Nativity (Kasi Lemmons) is a

musical inspired by Langston Hughes’s gospel play. It frequently tips its hat to the Harlem Renaissance poet but never exhibits his verbal wit or carefully composed anger. Instead, this Christmas melodrama about an emotional family reunion is satisfied with uninspired R&B tunes that don’t live up to the promise of the talent onboard. 93 min. NN (RS) Interchange 30

Blood Brother (Steve Hoover) profiles

Rocky Braat, a young American who discovers his vocation as a volunteer at an Indian orphanage for children with HIV/ AIDS. Adventurous and naive, Rocky went looking for “authenticity.” Instead he found great suffering tempered by the ­irrepressible joy of the children for whom he would become an inexhaustible caregiver and honorary big brother. The directorial debut of Rocky’s best friend Hoover, this earnest first-person documentary is frequently both spectacular and moving.

But aside from some backstory off the top and a wedding at the end, it’s also fairly shapeless and could have benefited from greater context, critical distance and closer attention to structure. Hoover comes to his emotional wallops honestly. I just wish

BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOR (Ab-

ñ

dellatif Kechiche) tracks university art student Emma’s (Léa Seydoux) multiyear relationship with high schooler Adèle (Adèle Exarchopoulos). The big buzz surrounding this Palme d’Or winner centres on the protracted sex scenes, but there’s more going on here than a whack of lesbian erotica. Kechiche shoots in intense close-up, showing people eating, showering, weeping (chronic crier Adèle is a mess of bodily fluids) in what turns out to be a unique, in-your-face exploration of intimacy and sensuousness. And it’s as much about what happens when an artist partners with someone who lacks similar aspirations. Emma works toward success as a painter, while Adèle is happy to become an elementary school teacher, to Emma’s increasing dissatisfaction. Both Seydoux and Exarchopoulos – who received a dual acting award at Cannes – are superb, and, yes, the sex is plentiful and hot. Let’s hope there’s no American remake. They’d wreck it. Subtitled. 179 min.

NNNN (SGC) Carlton Cinema, Kingsway Theatre, TIFF Bell Lightbox

BLUE JASMINE (Woody Allen) stars

ñ

Cate Blanchett as the emotionally unhinged wife of a corporate sleazebag (Alec Baldwin) who moves to San Francisco to live with her sister (Sally Hawkins) when he’s busted. Expect Oscar to come calling on the amazing Blanchett. 98 min.

NNNN (SGC) Interchange 30, Mt Pleasant

THE BOOK THIEF (Brian Percival) reframes the Second World War as a coming-of-age story about a young German girl (Monsieur Lazhar’s Sophie Nélisse). Director Percival has helmed a lot of Downton Abbey episodes, and it shows in film’s odd propriety. A movie about the Holocaust can’t be afraid of confronting its own message. 131 min. NN (NW) Canada Square, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Courtney Park 16, Interchange 30, Kingsway Theatre, Rainbow Promenade, SilverCity Mississauga, Varsity, Yonge & Dundas 24

around jabbering at each other and making fart noises, this will be your new favourite thing. If you’re me, you end up with a headache and a sense that the world hates you. I did appreciate the running gag about the guacamole sadness hat, though. 98 min. NN (NW) Interchange 30

hey as Ron Woodroof, a hard-living, womanizing Texas electrician who became an unlikely AIDS activist in the mid1980s after being diagnosed with HIV. McConaughey shed 47 pounds for the role and is almost unrecognizable, but his charm and passion shine through, and he gets strong support from Jared Leto and Jennifer Garner. Expect major acting nominations come awards season. 117 min.

NNNN (GS) Canada Square, Carlton Cinema, Colossus, Eglinton Town Centre, Kingsway Theatre, SilverCity Mississauga, SilverCity Yonge, Varsity, Yonge & Dundas 24

DON JON (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) stars writer/director Gordon-Levitt as a pornaddicted stud who thinks porn is more exciting than the real thing – including Barbara (Scarlett Johansson, who’s terrific), his latest gorgeous but demanding conquest. The script is sometimes supersavvy but it’s just a little too on the nose.

Caution: tons of (non-explicit) porn clips.

90 min. NNN (SGC) Scotiabank Theatre

DELIVERY MAN (Ken Scott) finds Quebec

writer/director Scott remaking his 2011 comedy Starbuck for the American market, with Vince Vaughn replacing Patrick Huard and the action moved from Montreal to Brooklyn. It’s exactly the same movie, but it holds up okay. 105 min. NNN (NW) Canada Square, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Grande - Steeles, Queensway, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Mississauga, Yonge & Dundas 24

ELYSIUM (Neill Blomkamp) is virtually identical, plot-wise, to the director’s wildly overrated 2009 debut, and fans of District 9’s spectacular carnage and garbled political posturing will doubtless find this one even more meaningful and relevant and stuff. The Phantom Menace still has its defenders, too. Some subtitles. 109 min.

NN (NW) Interchange 30

DESPICABLE ME 2 (Chris Renaud, Pierre Coffin) has about 35 minutes of story and an hour of frickin’ minion jokes. If you love watching little tubular yellow guys run

eerie horror thriller.

Clever and engaging.”

– CRAVEONLINE

freaky, viscer al experience.”

– THE LOS ANGELES TIMES

CAPTAIN PHILLIPS (Paul Greengrass) stars Tom Hanks in a fantastic performance as the eponymous skipper of a commercial vessel hijacked by Somali pirates in 2009.

The rest of the film is far more problematic, with director Greengrass applying the tense, jangled docudrama aesthetic of United 93 to another true-life hostage crisis. Some subtitles. 134 min. NNN (NW) Canada Square, Carlton Cinema, Interchange 30, Yonge & Dundas 24

NOW picks your kind of movie DRAMA

FAMILY

THRILLER

FOREIGN

PHILOMENA

FROZEN

GRAVITY

BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOR

Steve Coogan and Judi Dench make a terrific odd couple in this film – inspired by a real story – about a jaded journalist who helps a woman track down the son she was forced to give up.

Kristen Bell and Broadway stars Idina Menzel, Jonathan Groff and Josh Gad add their voices to this entertaining Disney musical loosely inspired by the Snow Queen fairy tale.

Toronto film critics recently named Alfonso Cuarón the year’s best director for this technically impressive, nailbiting story about an astronaut (Sandra Bullock) trying to make her way home.

Léa Seydoux and Adèle Exarchopoulos play a young French lesbian couple in Abdellatif Kechiche’s absorbing Palme d’Or-winning film.

continued on page 78 œ

“A n “A

Flick Finder

ABIGAIL

7 best picture

GOLDEN GLOBE NOMINATIONS ®

I N C L U D I N G

C O M E D Y

he’d asked tougher questions along the way. 92 min. NNN (José Teodoro) Bloor Hot Docs Cinema

BRESLIN

THE COUNSELOR (Ridley Scott) is a thriller

about an unnamed El Paso attorney (Michael Fassbender) whose world collapses into chaos when a drug deal in which he’s mixed up goes south. Stultifyingly dull and thick-witted, it plays out its inevitabilities like a tabloid journalist flipping through a selection of crime scene photos.

Yes, it’s all very ugly. What was the point again? 117 min. N (NW) SilverCity Mississauga

®

best ensemble

THE CRASH REEL (Lucy Walker) wants to

enlighten and inform audiences about the dangers of traumatic brain injuries, which would seem to conflict with the feel-good arc of injured snowboarder Kevin Pearce enduring rehab so he can get back to the powder. But director Walker (Blindsight, Waste Land) never finds a way to highlight the contradictions in the stories she’s telling, or even to acknowledge them. She’s a talented filmmaker, but this feels as though it was thrown together on the run, a documentary about the awesomeness of Kevin Pearce that turned into a documentary about his traumatic brain injury.

It could stand to lose half an hour of snowboarding footage, but who’d want to see it then? 108 min. NNN (NW) TIFF Bell Lightbox

DALLAS BUYERS CLUB (Jean-Marc

ñ

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Grant Achatz makes your mouth water in Spinning Plates. œcontinued from page 77

Ender’s Game (Gavin Hood) is Harry ­ otter And The Starship Troopers, a very P expensive, very elaborately designed attempt to build a new super-franchise out of Orson Scott Card’s 1985 sci-fi novel about a gifted young boy (played here by Asa Butterfield) chosen to save the world from an alien threat. 113 min. NN (NW) Yonge & Dundas 24

ñEnough Said

(Nicole Holofcener) is an alt romantic dramedy about a masseuse (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) who can’t reveal to her glamorous new client ­(Catherine Keener) that she’s dating the woman’s ex (James Gandolfini). It has all the qualities that make writer/director Holofcener so good: a great cast, complicated relationships and smart writing.

Louis-Dreyfus is surprisingly nuanced as the needy Eva, and fuhgeddabout The Sopranos – Gandolfini has a lovable charm as the schleppy ex. The always watchable Toni Collette is on board as Eva’s best friend. As in Please Give, Holofcener displays a clear eye for relationships between parents and teens, never using the kids as mere devices. And though she has taken a bit of the edge off the proceedings, her dialogue is as sly as ever. 93 min. NNNN (SGC) Canada Square, Kingsway Theatre

The Family (Luc Besson) is a forgettable

and not very funny comedy carried by the charm of its stars and by director Luc Besson’s skills with camera and editor’s scissors. Michelle Pfeiffer and Robert De Niro, with Dianna Agron and John D’Leo as teen daughter and son, play the titular family, living under the witness protection program but still carrying on with crime.

Some subtitles. 110 min. NN (AD)

Interchange 30

47 Ronin (Carl Rinsch) 118 min. See Also

Opening, page 75.

Opens Dec 25 at 401 & Morningside, Carlton Cinema, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Queensway, Scotiabank Theatre, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Yonge, SilverCity Yorkdale

Free Birds (Jimmy Hayward) finally brings audiences the inevitable talkingturkey CGI Thanksgiving comedy. Thankfully, it’s actually decent. Owen Wilson and Woody Harrelson lend their voices to a pair of turkeys who travel back in time to the first Thanksgiving to take their ancestors off the menu. Pixar veteran Hayward and long-time Kevin Smith collaborator Scott Mosier deliver a surprisingly clever script packed with just enough silly slapstick for kids and pop culture references for parents to turn the dull concept into an amusing comedy. It’s ultimately just family fluff, but at least it’s fun family fluff, and that’s really all you can ask from a talking-turkey picture. 91 min. NNN (Phil Brown) Canada Square, Interchange 30, Kingsway Theatre, SilverCity Mississauga Friend 2: The Legacy (Kwak Kyung-taek) is a self-important, melodramatic sequel to the 2001 South Korean crime drama Friend. Picking up 17 years after the original, a crime boss (Yoo On-Seong) wraps up his prison sentence for ordering a hit on his best friend/rival gang leader. Reuniting with his Busan crime family only to discover that the new leadership isn’t too keen on returning control, he mounts

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a violent takeover effort with a prison mate (Kim Woo-bin), a young firecracker in desperate need of a father figure. The pair’s emotional entanglements give this sequel some much-needed heft, and Kim’s fine performance especially enlivens the derivative material. Subtitled. 124 min. NN (RS) Yonge & Dundas 24

Frozen (Chris Buck, Jennifer Lee) feels like a throwback to the classic golden period of Disney animated musicals, and while it doesn’t reach the heights of a Lion King or Beauty And The Beast, it’s entertaining enough, despite a lopsided narrative and the lack of a compelling villain. Orphaned princesses Anna (voiced by Kristen Bell) and Elsa (Idina Menzel) have grown up apart (but in the same castle) since childhood, ever since Elsa’s power to turn everything to ice nearly got Anna killed.

But when Elsa ascends the throne, her gift reveals itself, and she flees to icy isolation in the mountains, followed by Anna, loner outdoorsman Kristoff (Jonathan Groff) and happy-go-lucky snowman Olaf (Josh Gad). It’s basically The Snow Queen mixed with Wicked, but the creators were smart enough to cast one of the latter’s stars (Menzel) and a host of other Broadway belters. The songs are derivative but ­effective, but only Olaf’s hilarious ditty about wanting to experience summer is destined for classic status. And Gad’s Olaf is the most entertaining sidekick since ­Timon and Pumbaa. 102 min. NNN (GS) 401 & Morningside, Beach Cinemas, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Humber Cinemas, Queensway, Rainbow Market Square, Rainbow Promenade, Rainbow Woodbine, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Yonge, SilverCity Yorkdale, Yonge & Dundas 24

ñGoodNNNNVibrations

(Lisa Barros D’Sa, Glenn Leyburn) 101 min. See review, page 74.

(NW) Opens Dec 20 at TIFF Bell Lightbox

ñGravity STARTS FRIDAY! See the trailer at filmswelike.com 78

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(Alfonso Cuarón) plays as both an immediate, nail-biting thriller and a stunning technological accomplishment, following two astronauts ­(Sandra Bullock, George Clooney) stranded in orbit and cut off from mission control.

It’s not science fiction – it’s set firmly in the present day, and the stakes are as intimate as they come. Cuarón’s screenplay,

Ñ

co-written with his son Jonás, is a triumph of psychological realism and narrative ­efficiency; there isn’t a wasted shot or an extraneous line of dialogue. There are things here you’ve never seen before; this is a great, unprecedented picture. One word of warning, though: even if you don’t have vertigo, the IMAX 3D version may well leave you with it. 91 min. NNNNN (NW) 401 & Morningside, Canada Square, Carlton Cinema, Colossus, Queensway, Yonge & Dundas 24

Grudge Match (Peter Segal) 113 min.

See Also Opening, page 75.

Opens Dec 25 at 401 & Morningside, Carlton Cinema, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Queensway, Scotiabank Theatre, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity ­Mississauga, SilverCity Yonge, SilverCity Yorkdale

ñHer

(Spike Jonze) 125 min. See r­ eview, page 70. NNNN (NW) Queensway, Varsity

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

(Peter Jackson) is another two hours and 40 minutes of Bilbo Baggins (Martin Freeman) and his dwarf allies encountering giant spiders and orcs and elves and more orcs (or possibly the same orcs again) and a soupçon of political treachery on the way to the mountain where the dragon Smaug lies sleeping in his plundered gold.

You may ask yourself why this isn’t the end of it. There isn’t enough story for three Hobbit movies, so Jackson’s had to invent new characters and new subplots – fan service to Tolkien diehards who need to actually see the rise of Sauron (also ­irrelevant to the story of The Hobbit), or to Jackson himself, whose swooping camera movements and elaborate single-take ­action sequences are starting to feel a ­little creaky and self-indulgent. Of course, making a nine-hour movie out of a short novel is pretty self-indulgent in itself.

Some subtitles. 161 min. NN (NW) 401 & Morningside, Beach Cinemas, Carlton Cinema, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Humber Cinemas, Queensway, Rainbow Market Square, Rainbow Promenade, Rainbow Woodbine, Scotiabank Theatre, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Yonge, SilverCity

Yorkdale

Homefront (Gary Fleder) is an utterly

generic shoot-’em-up starring writer/producer Sylvester Stallone’s Expendables buddy Jason Statham as an ex-DEA agent who moves to a small Louisiana town to raise his young daughter (Izabela Vidovic).

He’s drawn back into warrior mode when a school fight with a bully leads to an escalating feud with the kid’s uncle (James Franco, better than he needs to be), a meth dealer who sees an opportunity in selling the agent’s location to some old enemies. Stallone could write this sort of movie in his sleep, but director Fleder is a professional, and Homefront’s progression from cat-and-mouse thriller to full-on action movie is efficient and enjoyable.

Not original in the slightest, mind you, but it is entertaining. 100 min. NNN (NW) 401 & Morningside, Canada Square, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Queensway, ­Rainbow Woodbine, Scotiabank Theatre, SilverCity Yorkdale

ñThe Hunger Games: Catching Fire

(Francis Lawrence) proves the Oscar curse can be beaten. Best-actress winner Jennifer Lawrence is a knockout in this second instalment of the franchise, which, unlike many actors’ releases following ­Oscar wins, is not total crap. It’s much ­better than Part 1: the script doesn’t need much set-up, there’s more focus on the relationship between Katniss (Lawrence) and Gale (which means more charismatic Liam Hemsworth), and director Lawrence keeps the violence offscreen instead of sanitizing it. Katniss and Peeta (Josh Hutcherson) are having trouble faking the love relationship that made them co-winners of the 74th Hunger Games, the arena spectacle in which a male and female from 12 districts fight to the death until there’s one person standing. But they’re sparking revolution against the wealthy 1 per cent, so baddie President Snow dreams up a new tourney in which the winners of the previous 24 games have to go into the ring. Who cares about plot holes in a fantasy? This is highly entertaining, and Lawrence is red hot in all ways.

145 min. NNNN (SGC) 401 & Morningside, Beach Cinemas, Canada Square, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles,

= Critics’ Pick nnnnn = Top ten of the year nnNn = Honourable mention nnn = Entertaining nn = Mediocre n = Bomb

as familiar as the routine in a seniors home. Even the jokes have bunions. Yet the four Oscar winners are so good at playing against each other, you can’t help wondering why they finally decided to do so now n a comedy that pays out as rarely as a slot machine. 110 min. NN (RS) Canada Square, Colossus, Kingsway Theatre, SilverCity Mississauga

Lee Daniels’ The Butler (Lee Daniels) is one big black history lesson featuring great performances by Oprah Winfrey, David Oyelowo and especially Forest Whitaker as a White House butler. But don’t expect anything like the director’s disturbing Precious or The Paperboy. ­Daniels is decidedly domesticated here, aiming to teach and please. 132 min. NNN (SGC) Mt Pleasant

ñLet the Fire Burn

(Jason Osder) examines the events of May 13, 1985, when Pennsylvania State Police dropped two incendiary bombs on a row house in West Philadelphia occupied by the militant black organization MOVE. It’s a grim look at the way a crisis gives people licence to do awful, awful things in the name of keeping the peace. 95 min. NNNN (NW) Kingsway Theatre

Maidentrip (Jillian Schlesinger) 82 min. See review, page 74. NNNN (GS) Opens Dec 20 at Bloor Hot Docs Cinema

ñ

Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom

Humber Cinemas, Queensway, Rainbow Market Square, Rainbow Promenade, Rainbow Woodbine, Scotiabank Theatre, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Yonge, SilverCity Yorkdale, Varsity

Davis ñInside LlewynNNNN

(Joel Coen, Ethan Coen) 105 min. See interview and review, page 64.

(NW) Opens Dec 20 at Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Queensway, TIFF Bell Lightbox, ­Varsity

Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa (Jeff

Tremaine) spins off Johnny Knoxville’s long-time old-man-makeup character into a Borat-style mixture of hidden camera pranks and simple storytelling. There’s no social satire, but the combination of Knoxville and 8-year-old Jackson Nicoll’s public pranks with intergenerational-bonding road comedy tropes feels like a vintage John Hughes comedy with Jackass interludes. As close to a sign maturity as these permanent adolescents can manage. 90 min. NNN (Phil Brown) Coliseum Mississauga, Colossus

Jingle Bell Rocks (Mitchell Kezin) dives into the rich, strange world of alternate Christmas music, and the results are odd and frequently joyful. Though the music industry will never stop covering White Christmas and Little Drummer Boy, each new yuletide produces a few weird, lovely tracks like The Flaming Lips’ A Change At Christmas (Say It Isn’t So), Clarence Carter’s Back Door Santa and Clarence Reid’s Winter Man, all of which Kezin investigates at length. He even tracks down bebop legend Bob Dorough, who collaborated with Miles Davis on the bitter, pointed Blue Xmas (To Whom It May Concern).

Kezin’s fascination with the Nat King Cole track The Little Boy That Santa Claus Forgot – with which he’s been obsessed since childhood – does edge into the maudlin, but it pays off in a pretty great way. 83 min. NNN (NW) Bloor Hot Docs Cinema, Kingsway Theatre Justin Bieber’s Believe (Jon M. Chu) 92

min. See Also Opening, page 75.

Opens Dec 25 at 401 & Morningside, ­Canada Square, Coliseum Mississauga, ­Colossus, Eglinton Town Centre, Yonge & Dundas 24

Last Vegas (Jon Turteltaub) stars veterans Robert De Niro, Michael Douglas, ­Morgan Freeman and Kevin Kline in a bachelor party comedy that sets up gags

(­ Justin Chadwick) 141 min. See review, page 72. NNN (SGC) Opens Dec 25 at Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Queensway, Varsity, Yonge & Dundas 24

Muscle Shoals (Greg Camalier) is

ñ

about the musically inclined backwater town in Alabama that has seen everyone from Aretha Franklin to the Rolling Stones come through to produce hits.

They’re among the many who speak affectionately here about their time with Rick Hall, of FAME Studios, arguably the backbone of the Muscle Shoals music industry. The interviews are woven together like music, composing a film with storytelling rhythms that strikes emotional chords. Soul aficionados will savour every beat. 111 min. NNNN (RS) Bloor Hot Docs Cinema, Kingsway Theatre, Regent Theatre

Nebraska (Alexander Payne) is a black-

and-white road movie about a Montana speaker salesman (Will Forte) who gets to know his remote, alcoholic father (Bruce Dern) as the pair drive to Lincoln to cure the older man’s obsession with a sweepstakes. It lacks the highs and lows of The Descendants and Sideways, feeling much more like director Payne’s 2002 drama About Schmidt: a slow, deliberate roll through a series of modest incidents that inform our understanding of its central character. Problem is, Nebraska never ­surprises. Road movies are by definition formulaic, but there’s a predictability to the way Bob Nelson’s screenplay trickles out details and shading that feel more calculated than they should. This isn’t to say that Nebraska is bad, but it’s awfully safe and contrived – not what we’ve come to expect from Payne. 115 min. NNN (NW) Canada Square, Kingsway Theatre, Varsity

Nicky’s Family (Matej Minac) 97 min. See review, page 74. NNN (RS) Opens Dec 20 at Kingsway Theatre Night Train to Lisbon (Bille August) is a dreary Euro-pudding that wastes several very talented actors in two stories separated by four decades. After stopping a young woman from jumping off a bridge, a Swiss professor (Jeremy Irons) finds himself taking her seat on the eponymous train to Portugal. Once there, he winds up investigating a decades-old love triangle between a writer (Jack Huston), a militant (August Diehl) and a remarkable young woman (Mélanie Laurent), all of whom were in the same resistance cell during the Portuguese military junta of 1974 to 76.

Neither plot thread is all that interesting,

and the actors all seem to know it; Bille August has never been particularly confident working in English, and it feels like he’s barely paying attention to what’s happening in front of him. Irons is a great listener, and he has a few nice scenes with Martina Gedeck as an optometrist with whom his character becomes friendly, but that’s hardly a reason to endure the rest of it. 111 min. NN (NW) Kingsway Theatre, Regent Theatre

The Nutcracker – Royal Opera House Encore is a repeat broadcast in high def

of Peter Wright’s classic all-ages seasonal ballet. 130 min.

Dec 20-22, at Yonge & Dundas 24; Dec 22, 12:55 pm, at Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Queensway, SilverCity Yonge,

Out of the Furnace (Scott Cooper) positions itself as a grand American tragedy, but it’s just a turgid, laughably grim slog through hoary old working-class clichés.

Christian Bale stars as Russell Baze, a noble ex-con in Braddock, Pennsylvania, who works at the mill, cares for his dying father and tries his best to keep his hapless brother Rodney (Casey Affleck) out of trouble. Rodney’s a veteran who expresses his PTSD through bare-knuckle boxing, which puts him on a collision course with Harlan DeGroat (Woody Harrelson), a seething brute who runs an underground fight club up in the mountains. One thing leads to another, and eventually Russell winds up on a collision course with Harlan as well, against the warnings of the local law (Forest Whitaker). And it’s here that Out Of The Furnace goes completely off the rails, spinning into one preposterous contrivance after another in order to reach its predetermined conclusion. There’s no dramatic weight or emotional resonance, just affectation. And the plot wouldn’t sustain an episode of Justified, let alone a feature film. It’s kind of awesome that Whitaker delivers all his lines in Bale’s Batman growl, though. 116 min. N (NW) Carlton Cinema, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Queensway, Scotiabank Theatre, Varsity

Walk, Eglinton Town Centre, Humber Cinemas, Interchange 30, Kingsway Theatre, Queensway, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Yonge, Varsity, Yonge & Dundas 24

Planes (Klay Hall) is a shameless Cars rip-

off about a modest crop-dusting plane named Dusty Crophopper (voiced by comic Dane Cook) who dreams of being a competitive flyer even though he’s scared of heights. The clunky script feels like a first draft, and Cook communicates as little personality as his character’s bland ­design. 92 min. N (GS) Interchange 30

The Prime Ministers: The Pioneers

(­ Richard Trank) is an unabashedly proZionist doc based on the memoirs of ­Yehuda Avner, who worked with Israeli PMs from David Ben-Gurion to Golda Meir and plays every propaganda trick in the book. First: pretend there’s no issue, only cause for celebration; Palestinians are completely invisible. Second: find an avuncular talking head – Avner, the only interviewee in the film – to give the piece some authority. (Even another staunch Zionist would have added much-needed texture.) Third: pull the celebrity-loving public on board by getting Hollywood AListers to voice the prime ministers, including Michael Douglas as Yitzhak Rabin

and Sandra Bullock (!) as Golda Meir.

Fourth: let the music swell to punctuate the stories of Jewish survival. The decision to program this puff piece may be explained by its decent stock footage and Avner’s inside dish on meetings with the egotistical Lyndon Johnson and a possibly inebriated Richard Nixon. But this doc is strictly for hardcore Zionists who haven’t noticed that the Middle East is deeply ­contested terrain. 114 min. NN (SGC) Bloor Hot Docs Cinema

Prisoners (Denis Villeneuve) stars Hugh Jackman as a Pennsylvania contractor who reacts to his daughter’s abduction by grabbing the most likely suspect (Paul Dano) and trying to beat the truth out of him. Jackman’s entirely convincing as a righteous hothead, but Villeneuve’s unable to keep Prisoners from collapsing into overwrought, mildly preposterous contrivance. And there’s simply no reason this movie needed to be two and a half hours long. 153 min. NNN (NW) Interchange 30, SilverCity Mississauga The Punk Syndrome (Jukka Kärkkäin-

en, Jani-Petteri Passi) trembles constantly on the edge of exploitation. The film profiles Finnish punk band Pertti Kurkian Nimi­päivät (Pertti Kurikka’s Name Day), a

continued on page 80 œ

CONTEST PICK OF THE WEEK

ñThe Pervert’s Guide to Ideology

(Sophie Fiennes) indulges philo­ sopher Slavoj Zizek as he excitedly slurs through mini-sermons on pet subjects: desire, “the paradox of Coke,” John ­Carpenter’s They Live, Kinder Eggs, etc.

Deconstructing Zizek, as usual, proves as dicey an enterprise as parsing statements like “A commodity is an object full of theological, even metaphysical, niceties. Its presence always reflects an invisible transcendence.” But questioning his political radical bona fides and his ideas for solutions to the problem of late capitalism always feels beside the point. He’s as much an entertainer as a thinker, and it’s enjoyable to get lost in the eddies of Zizek’s thought, swept up in the rhetorical currents even he seems to get lost in. 136 min. NNNN (JS) TIFF Bell Lightbox

ñPhilomena

(Stephen Frears) tells the true story of journalist Martin Sixsmith’s attempt to help an Irish woman, Philomena Lee, track down the son she was forced to give up five decades earlier. It’s an odd but effective combination of investigative drama and buddy ­picture, as the devout, working-class Lee (Judi Dench) and the privileged, cynical Sixsmith (Steve Coogan, who also cowrote and co-produced the film) find common ground in the search for her son.

Director Frears lays it on a little thick in the glimpses of the young Philomena at a home for wayward mothers, but the rest of the story is handled far more elegantly, framing the historical blemish of baby trafficking through an immediate, personal lens. It’s a tribute to both actors that Dench’s performance doesn’t feel like a naked Oscar bid, nor does she totally obliterate Coogan’s fine supporting turn. 98 min. NNNN (NW) Canada Square, Cineplex Cinemas Empress

HOWL’S MOVING CASTLE A charismatic wizard attempts to stop a destructive war in master director Hayao Miyazaki’s blockbuster fantasy adventure.

DEC 24, 4PM AT TIFF BELL LIGHTBOX

REITMAN SQUARE, 350 KING ST REET WEST

350 King Street W 416-968-3456 For Full FilM liStingS, viSit tiff.net

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79

401 & Morningside, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Rainbow Woodbine, SilverCity Yorkdale, Yonge & Dundas 24

ñWadjda

(Haifaa Al-Mansour) tracks 10-year-old schoolgirl Wadjda (Waad Mohammed), who enters a Koran study contest so she can buy a bicycle with the winnings. The premise is sly enough – females aren’t allowed to drive in ultra-conservative Saudi Arabia – and Mohammed is appealing as the young heroine, but Al-Mansour’s depiction of everyday Saudi life is what counts here.

Subtitled. 97 min. NNNN (SGC) Interchange 30, Kingsway Theatre

ñThe Wagner Files

(Ralf Pleger) is a documentary about 19th-century German composer Richard Wagner that borrows techniques from modern espionage films, graphic novels and 1950s melodrama. It all adds up to a respectful and informative portrait: think Robert Ludlum meets Douglas Sirk, or The Wagner Identity. Director Pleger uses style to enhance content, depicting the composer’s frenzied trek through Europe to flee his creditors with Bourne Identity-style computer graphics and his symbiotic relationship with his second wife, Cosima, in passionate scenes featuring actors Samuel Finzi and Pegah Ferydoni. Half a dozen experts guide us through Wagner’s complex life, spending lots of time on his infamous anti-Semitism, his relationship with his chief patron, Bavaria’s King Ludwig, and his fetish for silk and roses. Of course his gorgeous music underscores everything, making this a must-see for classical music fans and an entertaining intro for Wagner neophytes. Subtitled. 90 min. NNNN (GS) Carlton Cinema

Even Ian McKellen looks like he’s fed up with The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug.

œcontinued from page 79

four-piece made up of developmentally ­disabled middle-aged men. They clearly enjoy playing together, but it’s tricky to tell how their fans, and the filmmakers, perceive the group. Scenes filmed in a voyeuristic “gotcha!” style of band members cleaning their asses in the shower or pissing with the door open feel leering and mean-spirited, like something dusted up from the cutting-room floor of Lars von Trier’s art house spasploitation flick The Idiots. Elsewhere, the movie proves ­impressively tender and even-handed, suggesting that even the idea that films about the handicapped are inherently ­exploitative is a kind of ableist prejudice, one proceeding from the viewer’s own discomfort. Subtitled. 85 min. NNN (JS) Carlton Cinema

ñRush

(Ron Howard) chronicles the ongoing rivalry in the mid-70s between two wildly different Formula One racers: the cold, cerebral Austrian Niki Lauda (Daniel Brühl) and the wildly charismatic English playboy James Hunt (Chris Hemsworth). Director Howard and superb screenwriter Peter Morgan contrast their stories effectively, getting even non-fans intrigued by the politics of commercial ­endorsements and the psychology of competition. 123 min. NNNN (GS) Kingsway Theatre

Saving Mr. Banks (John Lee Hancock) covers the last several months of the 20plus years that Walt Disney (Tom Hanks, who’s terrific) spent convincing author P.L. Travers (Emma Thompson) to sell him the 80

december 19-25 2013 NOW

rights to Mary Poppins. Charming Walt gets the prickly author in a room with composers Robert and Richard Sherman (B.J. Novak and Jason Schwartzman), who try to win her over with their cheery tunes, but unfortunately, she has daddy issues. The narrative moves between 1961 L.A. and Travers’s childhood in Australia where the alcoholic father she loves (Colin Farrell) dies. The older Travers is portrayed as an old lonely prune who only lightens up after she’s been in Disney’s orbit. I don’t expect a Disney pic to highlight Travers’s lesbian love life or her very serious spiritual pursuits, but this rendering is insulting. It’s is all about burnishing Disney’s personal reputation. 125 min. NN (SGC) 401 & Morningside, Canada Square, ­Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, ­Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Queensway, Rainbow Market Square, SilverCity Mississauga, Varsity, Yonge & Dundas 24

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (Ben Stiller) 114 min. See cover story and ­review, page 66. NNN (NW) Opens Dec 25 at 401 & Morningside, Carlton Cinema, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Queensway, Rainbow Promenade, Rainbow Woodbine, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Yonge, SilverCity Yorkdale, Yonge & Dundas 24 Spinning Plates (Joseph Levy) profiles

three restaurants that couldn’t be more different: Chicago’s Alinea, where chef Grant Achatz uses elaborate molecular gastronomy technology to turn a meal into abstract art; Breitbach’s Country Dining, in Balltown, Iowa, a massive family-run restaurant built on American staples like fried chicken and fruit pies; and Tucson’s La Cocina de Gabby, a Mexican place opened by Francisco Martinez to showcase his wife’s traditional home cooking. The editorial strategy is purely mechanical, cycling through the three venues as Levy shows how the restaurants function, recounts the challenges they’ve faced and the personal obstacles the owners have had to overcome. It works well enough as food porn – Breitbach’s buffet looks mouth-watering on a big screen – but it doesn’t have the transcendent feel of something like Jiro Dreams Of Sushi, where the preparation of food is an exercise in devotion and patience. There’s no greater statement being made, which left me hungry but unsatisfied. 93 min. NNN (NW) TIFF Bell Lightbox

Thor: The Dark World (Alan

ñ

­Taylor) is a very silly movie for all its self-seriousness, which is why it works.

Once again, Tom Hiddleston steals the picture as the unpredictable Loki, though Kat Dennings comes awfully close to stealing it herself as Jane Foster’s scrappy sidekick.

Some subtitles. 112 min. NNNN (NW) 401 & Morningside, Carlton Cinema, Coliseum Mississauga, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Queensway, Scotiabank Theatre, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Yonge, SilverCity Yorkdale

ñ12 Years a Slave

(Steve McQueen) finds McQueen rebounding from the uneven Shame with this stunning adaptation of the memoir by Solomon Northup, a free American sold into slavery in 1841

Ñ

and forced to spend more than a decade concealing his identity on a series of Southern plantations before he could ­contact his friends in the North. Chiwetel Ejiofor is a revelation as a man forced to conceal his intelligence and compassion – his very essence – in order to survive, and Benedict Cumberbatch and McQueen regular Michael Fassbender offer diametrically opposed performances as Nor­ thup’s masters over the years. Alfre Woodard, Sarah Paulson and Michael Kenneth Williams make effective appearances, and producer Brad Pitt turns up as a good-­ natured Canadian. McQueen directs with a total lack of sentiment, crafting each ­sequence with a merciless forward ­momentum that compensates for the ­episodic nature of the narrative. One of the best films of the year. 133 min. NNNNN (NW) Canada Square, Carlton Cinema, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Courtney Park 16, Interchange 30, Rainbow Market Square, SilverCity Mississauga, Yonge & Dundas 24

Tyler Perry’s A Madea Christmas

(Tyler Perry) is easily the most enjoyable Perry movie in years. Granted that’s not saying a whole lot since Perry’s brand of comic soap opera is as repellent to critics as it is welcome to its target “urban” audiences. This time around Perry holds back on the emotional suds (up to a point) and looks to have a jolly old time. He throws his vulgar mammy Madea into the ­Alabama backwoods for the Christmas holiday, which turns out to be ripe new scenery for her to chew on with her rambling, freestyle gags. She’s visiting her niece (Tika Sumpter), who is living on a farm and secretly married to a local (read: white guy), which causes a whole lot of mishap between the chocolate and vanilla in-laws and leaves Madea winningly playing r­eferee. 105 min. NNN (RS)

Walking With Dinosaurs (Barry Cook, Neil Nightingale) 87 min. See review, page 72. NN (RS) Opens Dec 20 at 401 & Morningside, Beach Cinemas, Canada Square, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, ­Eglinton Town Centre, Grande - Steeles, Queensway, Rainbow Promenade, Rainbow Woodbine, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Mississauga, SilverCity Yorkdale, Yonge & Dundas 24

ñWatermark

(Jennifer Baichwal, Edward Burtynsky) feels very much like a continuation of Manufactured ­Landscapes, collaborators Baichwal and Burtynsky’s previous work, once again ­exploring the effects of human industry on the natural world – in this case, our oceans and rivers. Baichwal’s contemplative approach meshes nicely with Burtyn­ sky’s fondness for finding geometric ­patterns in gargantuan constructions like dams and aquifers, and producer-cinematographer Nicholas de Pencier captures some splendid high-definition images.

(Watermark may set a record for the most helicopter shots in a Canadian production.) Baichwal and Burtynsky cushion their potentially grim ecological message with philosophical digressions and ­moments of unexpected whimsy, which seems like an awfully good idea right now.

Some subtitles. 90 min. NNNN (NW) TIFF Bell Lightbox

When Jews Were Funny (Alan Zweig) is

a survey of North American Jewish comics with an elusive theme and a lack of female subjects. But it’s very entertaining – it took Best Canadian Feature honours at TIFF 2013 – and interviews with the likes of old pros Norm Crosby, Jack Carter and Shelley Berman are fascinating. 90 min.

NNN (SGC) Kingsway Theatre

The Wolf of Wall Street (Martin Scor-

sese) 180 min. See Also Opening, page 75.

Opens Dec 25 at 401 & Morningside, Beach Cinemas, Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk, Coliseum Scarborough, Colossus, Courtney Park 16, Eglinton Town Centre, Grande Steeles, Queensway, Rainbow Market Square, Rainbow Promenade, Scotiabank Theatre, SilverCity Fairview, SilverCity Yonge, SilverCity Yorkdale, Varsity 3

= Critics’ Pick nnnnn = Top ten of the year nnNn = Honourable mention nnn = Entertaining nn = Mediocre n = Bomb

Online expanded Film Times

Aurora Cinemas • Cine Starz • Elgin Mills 10 • First Markham Place SilverCity Newmarket • SilverCity Richmond Hill • Interchange 30 5 Drive-In Oakville • SilverCity Oakville • Winston Churchill 24

nowtoronto.com/movies

(CE)..............Cineplex Entertainment (ET).......................Empire Theatres (AA)......................Alliance Atlantis (AMC)..................... AMC Theatres (I)..............................Independent lndividual theatres may change showtimes after NOW’s press time. For updates, go online at www.nowtoronto.com or phone theatres.

Available for selected films: RWC (Rear Window Captioning) and DVS (Descriptive Video Service)

Downtown

BLOOR HOT DOCS CINEMA (I) 506 BLOOR ST. W., 416-637-3123

BLOOD BROTHER (PG) Thu 9:00 Fri 8:45 Sat 3:45 Sun 8:30 JINGLE BELL ROCKS (PG) Sat 8:45 MAIDENTRIP (G) Fri 4:15, 6:30 Sat 6:15 Sun 1:00, 6:00 Wed 4:00 MUSCLE SHOALS (PG) Wed 9:00 THE PRIME MINISTERS: THE PIONEERS Thu 6:30 Sat 1:00 Sun 3:15

CARLTON CINEMA (I) 20 CARLTON, 416-494-9371

47 RONIN (PG) Wed 3:55, 6:40, 9:20 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES (PG) Thu-Mon 1:25, 4:00, 6:40, 9:20 Tue 1:25, 4:00, 6:40 Wed 4:00, 6:40, 9:20 ANDRÉ GREGORY: BEFORE AND AFTER DINNER Thu 1:40, 6:40 ANTISOCIAL Thu 1:30, 4:00, 7:00, 9:30 Fri-Mon, Wed 4:10, 9:30 Tue 4:10 BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOR (R) Thu 1:15 4:50 8:25 FriWed 1:15, 4:50, 8:30 CAPTAIN PHILLIPS (14A) Thu 3:50, 9:20 Fri-Tue 1:15, 6:30 DALLAS BUYERS CLUB (18A) Fri, Sun-Mon 1:30, 4:05, 6:50, 9:35 Sat 1:30, 4:05, 9:35 Tue 1:30, 4:05, 6:50 Wed 4:05, 6:50, 9:35 GRAVITY (PG) Fri-Mon, Wed 4:15, 7:00, 9:15 Tue 4:15, 7:00 GRUDGE MATCH (14A) Wed 4:10, 6:45, 9:20 HAUNTER (PG) Fri-Tue 1:45 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG (PG) Thu 1:10, 1:30, 4:40, 5:00, 8:00, 9:00 Fri-Mon 1:10, 2:00, 4:40, 5:30, 8:00, 9:00 Tue 1:10, 2:00, 4:40, 5:30 Wed 4:40, 5:30, 8:00, 9:00 LOVE ACTUALLY (14A) Sat 7:00 OUT OF THE FURNACE (14A) Fri-Mon, Wed 9:30 THE PUNK SYNDROME (PG) Thu 4:15, 9:15 THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY (PG) Wed 3:50, 6:40, 9:10 THOR: THE DARK WORLD (PG) 1:20, 3:55, 6:45, 9:25 Tue no 9:25 12 YEARS A SLAVE (14A) Thu 1:15, 4:00, 6:45, 9:30 Fri-Tue 1:15, 4:00, 6:45 Wed 4:00, 6:45 THE WAGNER FILES Thu 1:45, 7:00

RAINBOW MARKET SQUARE (I) MARKET SQUARE, 80 FRONT ST E, 416-494-9371

AMERICAN HUSTLE (14A) Thu 7:00, 9:50 Fri-Mon 12:50, 3:55, 6:50, 9:35 Tue 12:50, 3:55, 6:50 Wed 3:35, 6:50, 9:35 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES (PG) Thu 3:40, 6:50, 9:25 Fri-Mon 1:00, 3:40, 6:55, 9:25 Tue 1:00, 3:40, 6:55 Wed 3:40, 6:55, 9:25 FROZEN (G) 12:30, 2:50, 5:05, 7:15, 9:30 Tue no 9:30 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG (PG) Thu 12:30, 12:35, 3:50, 4:30, 7:10, 8:30 Fri-Mon 12:35, 1:05, 3:50, 4:30, 7:10, 8:30 Tue 12:35, 1:05, 3:50, 4:30 Wed 3:50, 7:10 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE (PG) Thu 12:40, 3:35, 6:35, 9:35 SAVING MR. BANKS (PG) Fri-Mon 12:40, 3:35, 6:35, 9:35 Tue 12:40, 3:35, 6:35 Wed 3:35, 6:35, 9:35 12 YEARS A SLAVE (14A) Thu 12:35, 3:20 THE WOLF OF WALL STREET (18A) Wed 4:30, 8:15

EXPERIENCE (PG) Thu-Tue 11:30, 3:00, 6:40, 10:20 Wed 11:25, 2:55, 6:20, 10:00 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG (PG) Thu-Tue 1:00, 1:30, 4:40, 5:10, 8:20, 8:50 Wed 1:30, 5:35, 9:20 HOMEFRONT (14A) Thu 12:15 3:20 6:00 8:30 11:00 Fri-Wed 12:15, 3:20, 6:00, 8:35, 11:00 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE (PG) Thu 11:40, 12:40, 1:45, 2:50, 4:00, 5:50, 7:20, 9:05, 9:40, 10:40 Fri-Tue 11:40, 12:40, 1:45, 2:50, 4:00, 5:50, 6:20, 7:20, 9:05, 9:35, 10:40 Wed 12:05, 12:50, 3:20, 4:10, 6:50, 7:30, 10:15, 10:55 OUT OF THE FURNACE (14A) Thu 11:30 2:15 5:00 7:40 10:50 Fri-Wed 11:30, 2:15, 5:00, 8:10, 11:00 THOR: THE DARK WORLD (PG) Thu-Tue 1:15 Wed 11:40, 2:30 THOR: THE DARK WORLD 3D (PG) Thu 4:25, 7:30, 10:30 Fri-Tue 4:25, 7:35, 10:30 Wed 5:20, 8:20, 11:10 THE WOLF OF WALL STREET (18A) Wed 10:50, 12:20, 1:15, 2:40, 4:30, 5:45, 6:40, 8:50, 9:40, 10:40

TIFF BELL LIGHTBOX (I) 350 KING ST W, 416-599-8433

BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOR (R) Thu 12:00, 2:30, 9:35 Fri-Sat, Mon-Tue 12:00, 8:30 Sun, Wed 8:30 THE CRASH REEL (PG) Thu 12:15, 2:45, 7:00, 9:30 Fri, SunTue 12:10, 3:35, 7:10, 9:40 Sat 12:10, 7:20 Wed 2:15, 9:40 FROM UP ON POPPY HILL (PG) Wed 6:45 GOOD VIBRATIONS (14A) 12:15, 2:45 Sun, Tue 7:15 INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS (14A) Wed 12:00, 2:30, 5:00, 6:30, 7:30, 9:05, 10:00 THE PERVERT’S GUIDE TO IDEOLOGY (PG) Thu 12:30, 3:30, 6:45 Fri 12:30, 3:30, 6:30, 9:30 Sat 2:25, 5:40, 6:45, 9:30 Sun 12:25, 3:30, 6:35, 9:30 Mon 2:20, 5:20, 9:35 Tue 12:30, 3:30, 6:30 Wed 12:30, 6:50 SPINNING PLATES (G) Thu 3:30, 7:15 Fri 2:35, 5:00, 6:20 Sat 12:05, 2:35, 5:00, 9:40 Sun 2:35, 5:00, 9:35 Mon 12:05, 2:40, 5:00, 6:20 Tue 2:35, 5:00, 6:20, 9:35 Wed 12:05, 4:40 WATERMARK (G) Thu 4:30, 9:40 Fri-Wed 5:05

VARSITY (CE)

55 BLOOR ST W, 416-961-6304 AMERICAN HUSTLE (14A) Fri-Tue 12:25, 3:45, 7:00, 10:25 Wed 12:25, 3:45, 7:05, 10:25 DALLAS BUYERS CLUB (18A) Thu 1:30, 4:05, 6:50, 9:35 HER (14A) Thu 1:25 4:20 7:20 10:10 Fri-Wed 1:05, 4:15, 7:20, 10:30 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE (PG) Thu 12:40, 3:50, 7:05, 10:15 Fri-Tue 12:00, 3:15, 6:30, 9:50 INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS (14A) Fri-Wed 1:20, 2:00, 4:00, 4:45, 6:50, 7:30, 9:40, 10:15 MANDELA: LONG WALK TO FREEDOM (14A) Wed 12:00, 3:25, 6:55, 10:20 NEBRASKA (PG) Thu 1:10, 4:00, 6:40, 9:15 Fri-Tue 12:40, 3:35, 6:35, 9:30 OUT OF THE FURNACE (14A) Thu 12:45, 3:30, 9:00 PHILOMENA (PG) Thu 2:30, 4:50, 7:30, 9:50 Fri-Wed 12:20, 2:45, 5:20, 7:55, 10:30 SAVING MR. BANKS (PG) Thu 12:50, 1:20, 3:40, 4:10, 6:15, 7:00, 9:30, 10:00 Fri-Tue 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 10:10 Wed 11:55, 4:20, 7:15, 10:30 THE WOLF OF WALL STREET (18A) Wed 12:30, 2:50, 6:40, 10:10

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AMERICAN HUSTLE (14A) Fri-Tue 12:15, 3:30, 6:45, 9:55 Wed 12:15, 3:15, 6:35, 9:35 THE BOOK THIEF (PG) Thu 3:25, 6:25, 9:20 HER (14A) Thu 1:00, 3:45, 6:35, 9:40 Fri-Tue 1:00, 4:05, 7:05, 10:00 Wed 1:00, 3:55, 6:50, 10:05 INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS (14A) Fri-Tue 12:50, 3:40, 6:15, 9:10 Wed 12:05, 3:35, 6:25, 9:55 PHILOMENA (PG) Thu 1:40, 4:00, 7:10, 9:30 SAVING MR. BANKS (PG) Thu 12:30 3:55 6:45 9:45 Fri-Wed 12:30, 3:25, 6:25, 9:20 THE WOLF OF WALL STREET (18A) Wed 11:55, 2:35, 6:15, 8:50

YONGE & DUNDAS 24 (CE) 10 DUNDAS ST E, 416-335-5323

ABOUT TIME (14A) Thu 12:30, 7:00, 9:50

AMERICAN HUSTLE (14A) Thu 7:00, 10:15 Fri-Wed 1:10, 3:30, 4:30, 6:45, 7:45, 10:15, 11:00 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES (PG) Thu 12:05, 1:05, 2:10, 3:10, 4:10, 5:05, 6:05, 7:05, 8:00, 9:00, 10:00, 10:45 Fri 12:30, 2:10, 3:25, 4:15, 5:05, 6:30, 7:15, 8:00, 9:15, 10:10, 10:55 Sat-Wed 12:30, 1:15, 2:00, 3:25, 4:15, 5:00, 6:30, 7:15, 8:00, 9:15, 10:10, 11:00 THE BOOK THIEF (PG) Thu 12:20, 3:40, 9:40 CAPTAIN PHILLIPS (14A) Thu 3:15, 6:15, 9:20 Fri-Tue 4:40, 10:40 COMMITMENT (14A) Thu 1:50, 4:30, 7:10, 9:50 DALLAS BUYERS CLUB (18A) Thu 4:40, 7:25, 10:20 Fri-Wed 12:20, 3:10, 6:10, 9:30 DELIVERY MAN (PG) Thu 2:50, 5:20, 7:55, 10:30 Fri-Tue 1:30, 8:05 DHOOM 3 Fri-Tue 1:00, 4:55, 9:00 DHOOM: 3 THE IMAX EXPERIENCE Fri 1:40, 6:00, 10:00 Sat-Tue 2:00, 6:00, 10:00 Wed 2:30, 6:15, 10:15 DIE HARD (14A) Thu 4:15, 9:45 ENDER’S GAME (PG) Thu 1:00, 4:00 FRIEND 2: THE LEGACY (14A) Thu 12:55, 4:10, 7:00, 9:55 Fri-Tue 1:20, 4:25, 7:30, 10:25 FROZEN (G) Thu 12:30, 3:20 Fri-Wed 12:00 FROZEN 3D (G) Thu 1:45, 4:20, 6:55, 9:30 Fri-Wed 2:35, 5:05, 7:40, 10:20 GRAVITY 3D (PG) Fri-Wed 1:50, 4:05, 6:20, 8:35, 10:50 GRAVITY: AN IMAX 3D EXPERIENCE (PG) Thu 2:35, 4:55, 7:15, 10:10 HOLIDAY INN Sat 5:20 Sun-Mon 7:00 Tue 1:45, 7:00 Wed 1:45, 9:30 HOME ALONE (PG) Fri 1:45, 7:10 Sat 7:30, 9:50 Sun 9:45 Mon 1:45, 4:15, 9:30 Tue 4:15, 9:30 Wed 4:15, 7:00 JUSTIN BIEBER’S BELIEVE (PG) Wed 12:40, 3:15, 5:45, 8:15, 10:45 MANDELA: LONG WALK TO FREEDOM (14A) Wed 12:05, 3:35, 7:00, 10:25 THE NUTCRACKER – ROYAL OPERA HOUSE ENCORE Fri 4:15, 9:45 Sat 2:30 Sun 12:55, 4:00 PERSONAL TAILOR Fri-Wed 12:55, 3:55, 7:05, 10:05 PHILOMENA (PG) Thu 12:45, 3:30, 6:50, 9:15 Fri-Wed 12:15 SAVING MR. BANKS (PG) Thu 7:20, 10:15 Fri 12:45, 4:30, 7:25, 10:30 Sat-Wed 12:45, 4:20, 7:25, 10:30 SCROOGED (PG) Thu 1:45, 7:30 THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY (PG) Wed 12:50, 1:55, 3:50, 4:55, 6:55, 7:55, 9:50, 10:55 12 YEARS A SLAVE (14A) Thu 12:25, 3:25, 6:45, 9:50 Fri-Wed 12:35, 3:40, 6:40, 9:55 TYLER PERRY’S A MADEA CHRISTMAS (14A) Thu 4:25, 6:45, 10:30 Fri-Tue 12:05, 2:55, 5:35, 8:15, 10:55 Wed 10:35 WALKING WITH DINOSAURS (PG) Fri-Wed 12:10 WALKING WITH DINOSAURS 3D (PG) 2:45, 5:20, 7:50, 10:35 Wed no 10:35

Midtown CANADA SQUARE (CE) 2200 YONGE ST, 416-646-0444

ALL IS LOST (PG) Thu 4:15, 6:40 Fri 3:45, 6:20, 8:40 Sat-Mon 1:30, 3:50, 6:20, 8:50 Tue 1:30, 3:50, 6:20 THE BOOK THIEF (PG) Fri 3:30, 6:15, 9:10 Sat-Mon 12:45, 3:30, 6:15, 9:10 Tue 12:45, 3:30, 6:15 Wed 3:30, 6:20, 9:10 CAPTAIN PHILLIPS (14A) Thu 4:00, 6:50 Fri 3:40, 6:30, 9:20 Sat-Mon 12:50, 3:40, 6:30, 9:20 Tue 12:50, 3:40, 6:30 DALLAS BUYERS CLUB (18A) Wed 4:20, 7:10, 9:40 DELIVERY MAN (PG) Thu 4:10, 6:30 Fri 4:30, 7:10, 9:40 SatMon 1:40, 4:30, 7:10, 9:40 Tue 1:40, 4:30, 7:10 ENOUGH SAID (PG) Thu 4:05, 6:20 FREE BIRDS (G) Thu 4:40 GRAVITY (PG) Fri 4:50, 7:20, 9:25 Sat-Mon 1:00, 3:05, 5:10, 7:20, 9:25 Tue 1:00, 3:05, 5:10, 7:20 GRAVITY 3D (PG) Thu 4:50, 7:10 HOMEFRONT (14A) Thu 7:15 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE (PG) Wed 3:30, 6:40, 9:40 JUSTIN BIEBER’S BELIEVE (PG) Wed 4:40, 7:15, 9:30 LAST VEGAS (PG) Thu 4:30, 7:00 NEBRASKA (PG) Wed 3:50, 6:30, 9:00 PHILOMENA (PG) Wed 4:30, 7:00, 9:20 SAVING MR. BANKS (PG) Fri 4:10, 7:00, 9:40 Sat-Mon 1:20, 4:10, 7:00, 9:40 Tue 1:20, 4:10, 7:00 Wed 4:00, 6:50, 9:35 12 YEARS A SLAVE (14A) Thu 4:00, 6:55 Fri 3:55, 6:45, 9:35 Sat-Mon 1:05, 3:55, 6:45, 9:35 Tue 1:05, 3:55, 6:45 WALKING WITH DINOSAURS (PG) Sat-Tue 1:50 Wed 3:50 WALKING WITH DINOSAURS 3D (PG) Fri-Mon 4:00, 6:10, 8:20 Tue 4:00, 6:10 Wed 6:10, 8:30

MT PLEASANT (I)

675 MT PLEASANT RD, 416-489-8484 BLUE JASMINE (14A) Fri-Sat 9:30 Sun-Mon 7:00

LEE DANIELS’ THE BUTLER (14A) Thu 7:00 Fri-Sat 6:45 Sun 4:10

REGENT THEATRE (I) 551 MT PLEASANT RD, 416-480-9884

MUSCLE SHOALS (PG) Thu, Sat 7:00 Fri 9:05 Sun 4:30 NIGHT TRAIN TO LISBON (14A) Fri, Sun 7:00 Sat 4:30

SILVERCITY YONGE (CE) 2300 YONGE ST, 416-544-1236

47 RONIN 3D (PG) Wed 1:10, 4:10, 7:25, 10:25 AMERICAN HUSTLE (14A) Fri-Sat, Mon 12:20, 3:40, 7:00, 10:20 Sun 12:20, 3:40, 7:00, 10:15 Tue 12:20, 3:40, 7:10 Wed 12:25, 3:40, 6:55, 10:10 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES (PG) Thu 2:10, 5:05, 8:00, 10:55 Fri-Mon 1:50, 4:50, 7:50, 10:50 Tue 1:50, 4:50, 7:50 Wed 1:30, 4:30, 7:40, 10:40 DALLAS BUYERS CLUB (18A) Thu 12:10, 5:15, 8:05, 10:55 Fri-Sat, Mon 1:10, 4:10, 7:25, 10:30 Sun 4:10, 7:30, 10:25 Tue 1:10, 4:10, 7:30 FROZEN (G) Thu, Sun 12:00 Fri-Sat, Mon-Wed 12:10 FROZEN 3D (G) Thu 2:20, 6:40, 9:30 Fri-Sat, Mon 2:50, 5:30, 8:10, 10:50 Sun 2:40, 5:20, 8:00, 10:40 Tue 2:50, 5:30, 8:10 Wed 2:55, 5:40, 8:20 GRUDGE MATCH (14A) Wed 1:00, 3:50, 6:45, 9:50 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG 3D (PG) Thu 12:00, 1:40, 2:40, 3:30, 5:20, 6:20, 7:00, 9:10, 10:10, 10:40 Fri-Sat, Mon 12:00, 2:40, 3:30, 6:20, 7:10, 10:05, 10:50 Sun 11:50, 2:40, 3:20, 6:20, 7:00, 10:05, 10:40 Tue 12:00, 2:40, 3:30, 6:20, 7:20 Wed 12:00, 3:30, 7:10, 10:50 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG (PG) Fri-Mon, Wed 1:40, 5:20, 9:10 Tue 1:40, 5:20 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE (PG) Thu 1:00, 4:15, 7:30, 10:45 Fri-Sat, Mon 12:00, 3:20, 6:45, 10:15 Sun 12:40, 4:00, 7:20, 10:40 Tue 12:00, 3:20, 7:00 Wed 11:00 THE NUTCRACKER – ROYAL OPERA HOUSE ENCORE Sun 12:55 PHILOMENA (PG) Thu 3:00, 5:30, 8:15, 10:50 Fri-Sat, Mon 12:30, 3:00, 5:40, 8:05, 10:35 Sun 12:30, 3:00, 5:40, 8:05, 10:30 Tue 12:30, 3:00, 5:40, 8:05 THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY (PG) Wed 12:00, 2:45, 5:30, 8:15, 11:00 THOR: THE DARK WORLD (PG) Thu 12:45 THOR: THE DARK WORLD 3D (PG) Thu 3:55, 6:50, 9:50 THE WOLF OF WALL STREET (18A) Wed 12:45, 4:45, 8:45

Metro

West End HUMBER CINEMAS (I) 2442 BLOOR ST. WEST, 416-769-2442

AMERICAN HUSTLE (14A) Fri-Mon 12:30, 3:30, 6:45, 9:40 Tue 12:30, 3:30, 6:45 Wed 3:30, 6:45, 9:40 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES (PG) Thu 3:20, 6:40, 9:35 Fri-Mon 12:45, 3:45, 7:00, 9:50 Tue 12:45, 3:45, 7:00 Wed 3:45, 7:00, 9:50 FROZEN (G) Thu 3:50, 6:50, 9:15 Fri-Mon 1:00, 4:00, 7:10, 9:30 Tue 1:00, 4:00, 7:10 Wed 4:00, 7:10, 9:30 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG (PG) Thu 3:00, 6:30, 9:45 Fri-Mon 12:00, 3:10, 6:30, 10:00 Tue 12:00, 3:10, 6:30 Wed 3:10, 6:30, 10:00 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE (PG) Thu 3:10, 9:25 Wed 9:30 PHILOMENA (PG) Thu 7:00

KINGSWAY THEATRE (I) 3030 BLOOR ST W, 416-232-1939

BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOR (R) Thu 9:10 Fri-Tue 9:30 THE BOOK THIEF (PG) Fri, Sun, Tue 3:15 Wed 3:40 A CHRISTMAS STORY Tue 11:25 Wed 12:00 DALLAS BUYERS CLUB (18A) Thu 7:10 Fri-Tue 7:30 Wed 9:30 ENOUGH SAID (PG) Thu 12:00 FREE BIRDS (G) Fri-Mon 11:25 JINGLE BELL ROCKS (PG) Thu 6:40 Fri-Tue 2:50 LAST VEGAS (PG) Thu 3:35 LET THE FIRE BURN (14A) Thu 5:05 MUSCLE SHOALS (PG) Thu 1:25 9:30 Fri-Wed 11:25, 9:30 NEBRASKA (PG) Fri-Tue 5:30 Wed 5:55

NICKY’S FAMILY (PG) Fri-Wed 1:20, 7:35 NIGHT TRAIN TO LISBON (14A) Thu 5:15 Sat, Mon 3:15 PHILOMENA (PG) Wed 7:55 RUSH (14A) Thu 1:30 Fri-Tue 1:10 Wed 1:35 WADJDA (PG) Thu 3:20 Fri-Wed 4:20 WHEN JEWS WERE FUNNY (14A) Thu 12:00, 8:10 Fri-Tue 6:00 Wed 2:50, 6:00

QUEENSWAY (CE)

1025 THE QUEENSWAY, QEW & ISLINGTON, 416-503-0424 47 RONIN 3D (PG) Wed 11:15, 2:10, 5:10, 8:10, 11:15 AMERICAN HUSTLE (14A) Thu 7:05, 10:25 Fri-Sun 1:10, 4:30, 7:55, 11:10 Mon-Tue 1:10, 4:30, 7:55, 11:05 Wed 12:20, 3:40, 7:10, 10:30 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES (PG) Thu 1:10, 2:10, 4:05, 5:05, 6:55, 8:00, 9:50, 10:55 Fri-Sat 11:15, 12:45, 2:10, 3:50, 5:05, 7:00, 8:00, 10:10, 10:55 Sun 11:55, 2:10, 2:50, 3:50, 5:05, 7:00, 8:00, 10:10, 10:55 Mon 12:45, 2:10, 3:50, 5:05, 6:55, 8:00, 10:10, 11:00 Tue 12:45, 2:10, 3:50, 5:05, 7:00, 8:00, 10:10, 11:00 Wed 10:55, 1:50, 4:50, 7:50, 10:50 DELIVERY MAN (PG) Thu 1:15, 4:00 Fri-Sat, Mon-Tue 12:00, 2:35, 5:25, 8:10, 10:45 Sun 2:35, 5:25, 8:05, 10:45 DR. SEUSS’ HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS (G) Sat 11:00 FROZEN (G) Thu 12:55, 3:45, 6:35 Fri-Sat, Mon-Tue 11:20 Sun 12:40 Wed 11:00 FROZEN 3D (G) Thu 2:00, 4:45, 7:30, 10:15 Fri-Tue 2:00, 5:00, 7:50, 10:35 Wed 1:40, 4:40, 7:30, 10:20 GRAVITY 3D (PG) Thu 9:20 GRUDGE MATCH (14A) Wed 1:10, 4:00, 6:50, 9:45 HER (14A) Wed 12:30, 3:50, 7:00, 10:10 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG 3D (PG) Thu 12:00, 1:30, 2:30, 3:30, 5:15, 6:15, 7:00, 9:00, 10:00, 10:40 Fri-Sat 11:10, 11:40, 1:30, 2:55, 3:25, 5:15, 6:40, 7:10, 9:00, 10:20, 10:50 Sun-Mon 11:40, 1:30, 2:55, 3:25, 5:15, 6:40, 7:10, 9:00, 10:20, 10:50 Tue 11:40, 1:35, 2:55, 3:25, 5:15, 6:40, 7:10, 9:00, 10:20, 10:50 Wed 11:50, 3:35, 7:20, 11:10 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG (PG) Thu 12:45, 4:35, 8:20 Fri-Sat, Mon-Tue 12:35, 4:20, 8:20 Sun 12:30, 4:20, 8:20 Wed 11:10, 2:50, 6:30, 10:15 HOLIDAY INN Mon 7:00 HOMEFRONT (14A) Thu 12:20, 3:20 Fri 12:25, 3:15, 5:50, 8:30, 11:05 Sat 3:10, 5:50, 8:30, 11:05 Sun 5:50, 8:30, 11:05 Mon 1:25, 4:10, 9:50 Tue 1:25, 4:10, 6:55, 9:40 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE (PG) Thu 12:30, 3:00, 3:55, 6:25, 7:20, 9:45, 10:45 Fri-Sun 12:15, 4:00, 7:30, 11:00 Mon-Tue 12:15, 4:00, 7:30, 10:55 Wed 12:40, 4:10, 7:40, 11:05 INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS (14A) Wed 1:30, 4:20, 7:05, 9:55 MANDELA: LONG WALK TO FREEDOM (14A) Wed 10:55, 2:30, 6:20, 10:00 THE NUTCRACKER – ROYAL OPERA HOUSE ENCORE Sun 12:55 OUT OF THE FURNACE (14A) Thu 1:50, 5:00, 7:50, 10:50 PHILOMENA (PG) Thu 1:35, 4:10, 6:45, 9:30 Fri-Sat, MonTue 1:00, 3:35, 6:30, 9:10 Sun 12:05, 3:35, 6:30, 9:10 SAVING MR. BANKS (PG) Thu 7:10, 10:10 Fri-Tue 1:20, 4:40, 7:40, 10:40 Wed 1:45, 4:55, 8:00, 11:00 THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY (PG) Wed 11:20, 2:20, 5:20, 8:20, 11:15 THOR: THE DARK WORLD (PG) Thu 1:40 Fri-Tue 12:50 THOR: THE DARK WORLD 3D (PG) Thu 4:50, 7:40, 10:30 Fri-Tue 3:45, 6:50, 9:45 WALKING WITH DINOSAURS (PG) Fri-Tue 11:50 Wed 11:05, 1:00 WALKING WITH DINOSAURS 3D (PG) Fri-Tue 2:20, 4:50, 7:20, 9:55 Wed 3:25, 6:00, 8:30, 10:55 THE WOLF OF WALL STREET (18A) Wed 2:40, 6:40, 10:40

RAINBOW WOODBINE (I)

WOODBINE CENTRE, 500 REXDALE BLVD, 416-213-1998 AMERICAN HUSTLE (14A) Thu 7:00, 9:45 Fri-Mon 12:50, 3:45, 6:40, 9:35 Tue 12:50, 3:45, 6:40 Wed 3:45, 6:40, 9:35 ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES (PG) Thu 1:20, 4:00, 6:45, 9:30 Fri-Mon 1:20, 3:55, 6:45, 9:30 Tue 1:20, 3:55, 6:45 Wed 3:55, 6:45, 9:30 FROZEN (G) Thu-Mon 1:15, 4:15, 7:00, 9:25 Tue 1:15, 4:15, 7:00 Wed 4:15, 7:00, 9:25 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG (PG) Thu 1:00, 1:30, 4:30, 5:00, 8:00, 9:00 Fri-Mon 12:45, 1:10, 4:00, 4:30, 7:30, 8:00 Tue 12:45, 1:10, 4:00, 4:30, 7:30 Wed 4:00, 7:30 HOMEFRONT (14A) Thu 1:10, 4:10 THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE (PG) Thu 12:45, 3:45, 6:40, 9:40 THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY (PG) Wed 4:10, 6:50, 9:20 TYLER PERRY’S A MADEA CHRISTMAS (14A) Thu 1:05, 3:55, 7:05, 9:35 Fri-Mon 1:05, 3:50, 6:55, 9:15 Tue 1:05, 3:50, 6:55 Wed 3:50, 6:55, 9:15 continued on page 82 œ

SCOTIABANK THEATRE (CE) 259 RICHMOND ST W, 416-368-5600

47 RONIN (PG) Wed 11:15, 2:15 47 RONIN 3D (PG) Wed 10:55, 1:45, 4:40, 5:10, 7:40, 8:05, 10:45, 11:10 DON JON (18A) Thu-Tue 12:50, 3:10, 5:25, 8:00, 10:10 GRUDGE MATCH (14A) Wed 11:05, 1:00, 2:00, 3:50, 4:55, 7:00, 7:50, 9:50, 10:30 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG 3D (PG) Thu-Tue 12:00, 12:30, 2:00, 2:30, 3:30, 4:10, 5:40, 6:10, 7:10, 7:50, 9:20, 9:50, 10:50 Wed 11:55, 12:35, 3:35, 4:20, 7:15, 8:35, 11:00 THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG: AN IMAX 3D

NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

81

movie times œcontinued from page 81

Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri-Mon 12:55, 2:55, 5:00, 7:05, 9:10 Tue 12:55, 2:55, 5:00, 7:05 Wed 5:00, 7:05, 9:10

East End Beach Cinemas (AA) 1651 Queen St E, 416-699-1327

American Hustle (14A) Thu 7:00, 10:00 Fri-Mon 12:50, 4:00, 7:15, 10:15 Tue 12:50, 4:00, 7:15 Wed 4:00, 7:15, 10:15 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu 7:30, 10:20 Fri-Mon 2:00, 4:50, 7:40, 10:40 Tue 2:00, 4:50, 7:40 Wed 4:30, 7:40, 10:40 Frozen (G) Fri-Tue 12:30 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 6:30, 9:00 Fri-Mon 3:45, 6:30, 9:10 Tue 3:45, 6:30 Wed 3:45, 6:45 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu 6:45, 10:15 Fri-Mon 12:00, 3:30, 7:00, 10:30 Tue 12:00, 3:30, 7:00 Wed 3:30, 7:00, 10:30 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 8:30 Fri-Tue 1:00, 4:30, 8:00 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 7:15, 10:30 Wed 9:30 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri-Tue 12:15 Walking With Dinosaurs 3D (PG) Fri-Mon 2:35, 5:00, 7:25, 9:45 Tue 2:35, 5:00, 7:25 Wed 5:00, 7:25, 9:45 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 4:45, 8:40

North York Cineplex Cinemas Empress Walk (CE) 5095 Yonge St., 416-847-0087

American Hustle (14A) Thu 7:10, 10:15 Fri-Mon, Wed 12:20, 3:40, 7:00, 10:20 Tue 12:20, 3:40, 7:00 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu 4:30, 7:30, 10:20 Fri-Mon, Wed 2:00, 5:00, 7:50, 10:45 Tue 2:00, 5:00, 7:50 The Book Thief (PG) Thu 3:35 Frozen (G) Fri-Wed 11:00 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 5:10, 7:50, 10:25 Fri-Mon 1:50, 4:50, 7:40, 10:25 Tue-Wed 1:50, 4:50, 7:40 Grudge Match (14A) Wed 1:20, 4:10, 7:25, 10:15 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu 3:00, 6:30, 10:00 Fri-Mon 11:10, 2:50, 6:30, 10:10 Tue 11:10, 2:50, 6:30 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug: An IMAX 3D Experience (PG) Thu 3:30, 7:00, 10:30 Fri-Mon, Wed 12:00, 3:30, 7:10, 10:50 Tue 12:00, 3:30, 7:10 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 5:20, 9:00 Fri-Mon 1:40, 5:20, 9:00 Tue 1:40, 5:20 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 4:10, 7:30, 10:45 Fri-Mon 12:30, 4:00, 7:30, 11:00 Tue 12:30, 4:00, 7:30 Wed 10:25 Inside Llewyn Davis (14A) Wed 12:00, 2:40, 5:20, 8:00, 10:40 Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom (14A) Wed 11:45, 3:20, 6:55, 10:30 The Nutcracker – Royal Opera House Encore Sun 12:55 Out of the Furnace (14A) Thu 3:55, 7:10, 10:10 Philomena (PG) Thu 4:00, 6:40, 9:20 Fri-Sun 1:30, 4:20, 7:20, 10:05 Mon 1:30, 4:20, 6:55, 9:15 Tue 1:30, 4:20, 7:20 Saving Mr. Banks (PG) Thu 7:00, 10:00 Fri-Sat, Mon, Wed 12:45, 3:50, 6:50, 10:00 Sun 12:15, 3:50, 6:50, 10:00 Tue 12:45, 3:50, 6:50 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 1:30, 4:20, 7:20, 10:15 12 Years a Slave (14A) Thu 3:50 Fri-Sat, Mon 12:05, 3:10, 6:25, 9:30 Sun 3:10, 6:25, 9:30 Tue 12:05, 3:10, 6:25 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 1:40, 5:40, 9:40

SilverCity Fairview (CE)

Fairview Mall, 1800 Sheppard Ave E, 416-644-7746 47 Ronin 3D (PG) Wed 1:20, 4:35, 7:30, 10:25 American Hustle (14A) Fri 1:00, 4:05, 7:20, 10:30 Sat 12:50, 4:05, 7:20, 10:30 Sun-Mon 12:05, 3:20, 6:45, 9:55 Tue 1:10, 4:25, 7:50 Wed 12:50, 4:00, 7:10, 10:20 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu 1:00, 4:05, 7:05, 10:05 Fri 1:40, 4:45, 7:40, 10:35 Sat 11:05, 1:50, 4:45, 7:40, 10:35 Sun-Mon 1:05, 4:10, 7:15, 10:10 Tue 2:00, 5:00, 8:00 Wed 1:00, 4:10, 7:20, 10:15 Delivery Man (PG) Thu 1:30, 4:10, 6:50, 9:40 Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (G) Sat 11:00 Frozen (G) Thu 1:40 Fri 1:10 Sat 11:10 Sun-Mon 1:00 Tue 1:55 Wed 12:45 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 4:25, 7:10, 9:55 Fri 4:50, 7:35, 10:20 Sat 2:00, 4:50, 7:35, 10:20 Sun-Mon 4:20, 7:05, 9:50 Tue 4:45, 7:30 Wed 4:25, 7:15 Grudge Match (14A) Wed 1:30, 4:30, 7:25, 10:10 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu 2:10, 3:10, 5:40, 6:40, 9:10, 10:10 Fri 1:05, 2:50, 3:40, 6:30, 7:10, 10:00, 10:40 Sat 11:30, 12:10, 3:00, 3:40, 6:30, 7:10, 10:00, 10:40 Sun-Mon 11:45, 12:15, 3:10, 3:45, 6:35, 7:10, 10:00, 10:30 Tue 12:30, 1:00, 3:55, 4:30, 7:20, 7:55 Wed 12:55, 3:30, 7:00, 10:30 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 1:10, 4:40, 8:10 Fri 1:50, 5:30, 9:15 Sat-Mon 1:30, 5:10, 9:00 Tue 1:50, 5:30 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 1:15, 4:30, 8:00 Fri 12:55, 3:35, 7:00, 10:25 Sat 12:00, 3:35, 7:00, 10:25 Sun-Mon 12:20, 3:40, 7:00, 10:25 Tue 12:50, 4:20, 7:45 Wed 10:00 Philomena (PG) Thu 1:50, 4:15, 7:00, 9:30

82

december 19-25 2013 NOW

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 1:15, 4:05, 7:05, 9:55 Thor: The Dark World (PG) Thu-Mon 1:20 Tue 1:40 Thor: The Dark World 3D (PG) Thu 4:20, 7:20, 10:15 Fri-Sat 4:20, 7:15, 10:10 Sun-Mon 4:25, 7:25, 10:20 Tue 4:50, 7:40 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri 1:15 Sat 11:20 SunMon 11:55 Tue-Wed 12:40 Walking With Dinosaurs 3D (PG) Fri, Wed 4:15, 6:50, 9:20 Sat 1:45, 4:15, 6:50, 9:20 Sun-Mon 2:20, 4:50, 7:20, 9:45 Tue 3:10, 5:40, 8:05 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 12:30, 3:00, 6:45, 10:35

SilverCity Yorkdale (CE) 3401 Dufferin St, 416-787-2052

47 Ronin 3D (PG) Wed 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 10:10 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu, SunMon 1:30, 4:30, 7:30, 10:30 Fri 1:45, 4:45, 7:45, 10:45 Sat 11:00, 2:00, 5:00, 8:00, 11:00 Tue 1:30, 4:30, 7:30 Wed 1:35, 4:35, 7:35, 10:35 Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (G) Sat 11:00 Frozen (G) Thu 12:10, 6:30 Fri, Sun-Mon 1:00 Sat 11:00 Tue 12:00, 1:00 Wed 11:45, 12:00 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 10:15 Fri 3:55, 7:05, 10:10 Sat 1:40, 4:30, 7:20, 10:10 Sun-Mon 4:00, 6:55, 9:45 Tue 4:00, 6:55 Wed 2:35, 5:20, 8:10 Grudge Match (14A) Wed 1:05, 4:00, 7:00, 9:50 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu, Sun-Mon 12:00, 2:20, 3:30, 6:10, 7:00, 10:00, 10:30 Fri 12:00, 3:00, 3:30, 6:40, 7:10, 10:20, 10:50 Sat 11:20, 12:00, 3:00, 3:30, 6:40, 7:10, 10:20, 10:50 Tue 12:00, 12:40, 3:30, 4:10, 7:00, 7:45 Wed 11:55, 3:35, 7:15, 10:55 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 1:30, 5:20, 9:10 Fri-Sat 1:45, 5:20, 9:00 Sun-Mon 1:20, 5:10, 9:00 Tue 2:30, 6:10 Wed 2:55, 6:35, 10:15 Homefront (14A) Thu 1:45, 4:20, 7:00, 9:55 Fri-Mon 1:25, 4:05, 6:45, 9:30 Tue 1:25, 4:05, 6:45 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 12:00, 2:55, 3:25, 6:50, 9:30, 10:25 Fri-Mon 12:10, 3:35, 7:00, 10:25 Tue 12:10, 3:35, 7:00 Wed 12:05, 3:30, 6:55, 10:20 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 1:30, 4:25, 7:20, 10:25 Thor: The Dark World (PG) Thu-Tue 12:45 Thor: The Dark World 3D (PG) 3:50, 6:50, 9:50 Tue no 9:50 Tyler Perry’s A Madea Christmas (14A) Thu 1:40, 4:30, 7:25, 10:10 Fri 2:25, 5:10, 7:50, 10:30 Sat 11:45, 2:25, 5:10, 7:50, 10:30 Sun-Mon 2:10, 4:55, 7:40, 10:20 Tue 2:10, 4:55, 7:40 Wed 10:50 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri, Sun-Wed 12:00 Sat 12:10 Walking With Dinosaurs 3D (PG) Fri 12:30, 2:30, 5:00, 7:30, 10:00 Sat 2:40, 5:10, 7:40, 10:10 Sun-Mon 2:30, 5:00, 7:30, 10:00 Tue 2:30, 5:00, 7:30 Wed 11:50, 2:30, 5:00, 7:30, 10:00 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 2:40, 6:40, 10:40

Scarborough 401 & Morningside (CE) 785 Milner Ave, Scarborough, 416-281-2226

47 Ronin 3D (PG) Wed 4:30, 7:40, 10:30 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu 5:30, 8:20 Fri, Sun-Mon 1:50, 4:40, 7:30, 10:15 Sat 11:10, 1:50, 4:40, 7:30, 10:15 Tue 1:50, 4:40, 7:30 Wed 2:20, 4:20, 7:30, 10:15 The Best Man Holiday (14A) Thu 5:20, 8:10 Fri-Mon 1:15, 4:00, 6:50, 9:45 Tue 1:15, 4:00, 6:50 Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (G) Sat 11:00 Frozen (G) Thu 5:10, 7:40 Fri, Sun-Tue 12:00 Sat 11:05, 12:00 Wed 2:20 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 5:45, 8:20 Fri-Mon 2:40, 5:15, 7:50, 10:20 Tue 2:40, 5:15, 7:45 Wed 2:50, 5:20, 8:00 Gravity 3D (PG) Fri-Mon 1:00, 3:15, 5:45, 8:10, 10:25 Tue 1:00, 3:15, 5:30, 7:45 Grudge Match (14A) Wed 4:10, 7:20, 10:00 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu 5:00, 8:25 Fri-Mon 12:05, 3:30, 7:00, 10:25 Tue 12:05, 3:30, 7:00 Wed 3:30, 7:00, 10:25 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 6:15, 7:30 Fri, Sun-Mon 1:35, 2:35, 5:00, 6:00, 8:30, 9:35 Sat 11:05, 1:35, 2:35, 5:00, 6:00, 8:30, 9:35 Tue 1:35, 2:35, 5:00, 6:00 Wed 5:00, 8:30 Homefront (14A) Thu 6:00, 8:30 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 5:05, 8:15 Fri-Mon 12:25, 3:35, 6:45, 9:55 Tue 12:25, 3:35, 6:45 Wed 10:35 Justin Bieber’s Believe (PG) Wed 3:10, 5:30, 8:10, 10:30 Saving Mr. Banks (PG) Fri-Mon 1:25, 4:20, 7:20, 10:10 Tue 1:25, 4:20, 7:20 Wed 3:45, 6:50, 9:45 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 2:30, 5:10, 7:50, 10:35 Thor: The Dark World (PG) Thu 5:15 Thor: The Dark World 3D (PG) Thu 7:50 Tyler Perry’s A Madea Christmas (14A) Thu 5:30, 8:00 Fri-Mon 12:20, 2:45, 5:10, 7:40, 10:05 Tue 12:20, 2:45, 5:10, 7:40 Wed 9:30 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri, Sun-Tue 12:10, 2:25, 4:50 Sat 11:15, 12:10, 2:25, 4:50 Wed 2:30 Walking With Dinosaurs 3D (PG) Fri-Mon 7:10, 9:25 Tue 7:10 Wed 4:50, 7:10 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 4:40, 8:45

Coliseum Scarborough (CE) Scarborough Town Centre, 416-290-5217

47 Ronin 3D (PG) Wed 2:05, 4:55, 7:45, 10:35 American Hustle (14A) Thu 7:00, 10:10 Fri-Tue 12:50, 4:05, 7:15, 10:25 Wed 12:45, 3:55, 7:05, 10:15 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu 2:10, 5:05, 8:00, 10:55 Fri, Sun-Tue 2:15, 5:05, 7:55, 10:45 Sat 11:15, 2:15, 5:05, 7:55, 10:45 Wed 1:15, 4:15, 7:25, 10:25 The Best Man Holiday (14A) Thu 1:05, 4:05, 7:05, 10:05 Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (G) Sat 11:00 Frozen (G) Thu-Fri, Sun-Tue 12:45 Sat 11:05, 1:15 Wed 1:00 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 3:45, 6:45, 9:45 Fri, Sun-Tue 3:45, 6:45, 9:40 Sat 4:05, 6:45, 9:40 Wed 4:00, 7:00 Grudge Match (14A) Wed 1:30, 4:25, 7:10, 10:05

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu 12:00, 1:45, 3:00, 3:30, 5:20, 6:40, 7:00, 9:00, 10:20, 10:40 Fri-Tue 12:00, 1:45, 3:30, 5:20, 7:00, 9:00, 10:40 Wed 12:15, 3:45, 7:15, 10:45 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 1:00, 4:40, 8:15 Fri-Tue 1:05, 4:40, 8:15 Wed 2:45, 6:20, 9:55 Homefront (14A) Thu 2:00, 4:45, 7:30, 10:15 Fri-Sat, MonTue 2:00, 4:45, 7:35, 10:15 Sun 4:45, 7:35, 10:15 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 12:30, 3:50, 7:10, 10:30 Fri-Tue 12:25, 3:50, 7:10, 10:35 Wed 12:20, 3:40, 7:00, 10:30 The Nutcracker – Royal Opera House Encore Sun 12:55 Out of the Furnace (14A) Thu 1:25, 4:25, 7:25, 10:25 Saving Mr. Banks (PG) Fri-Wed 1:50, 4:40, 7:30, 10:20 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 2:00, 4:50, 7:40, 10:30 Thor: The Dark World (PG) Thu-Tue 12:55 Thor: The Dark World 3D (PG) Thu 3:55 Fri-Tue 3:55, 7:00, 9:55 Tyler Perry’s A Madea Christmas (14A) Thu 1:45, 4:30, 7:15, 10:00 Fri-Tue 1:45, 4:25, 7:05, 10:00 Wed 9:45 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri-Tue 12:15 Wed 1:45 Walking With Dinosaurs 3D (PG) Fri-Tue 2:35, 5:00, 7:25, 9:45 Wed 4:10, 6:45, 9:15 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 2:20, 6:15, 10:10

Eglinton Town Centre (CE) 1901 Eglinton Ave E, 416-752-4494

47 Ronin 3D (PG) Wed 2:00, 4:50, 7:55, 10:55 American Hustle (14A) Fri-Tue 12:45, 4:05, 7:25, 10:50 Wed 12:40, 4:05, 7:25, 10:50 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu 1:35, 3:45, 4:30, 6:45, 7:30, 9:45, 10:30 Fri-Tue 1:05, 2:10, 4:00, 5:05, 7:00, 8:00, 9:55, 10:55 Wed 12:50, 1:50, 3:50, 4:45, 6:45, 7:45, 9:45, 10:45 Dallas Buyers Club (18A) Thu 3:50, 6:50, 9:40 Fri-Sun, Tue 2:05, 5:05, 8:05, 11:00 Mon 12:30, 3:30, 9:50 Dhoom 3 Fri-Tue 2:55, 6:45, 10:35 Wed 2:10, 6:40, 10:35 Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (G) Sat 11:00 Frozen (G) Thu 3:55, 6:40 Fri, Sun-Wed 11:55 Sat 11:15, 12:05 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 2:00, 4:40, 7:25, 10:10 Fri-Tue 2:40, 5:20, 7:55, 10:20 Wed 2:40, 5:15, 7:50 Grudge Match (14A) Wed 1:45, 4:35, 7:25, 10:15 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu 1:30, 2:45, 3:30, 5:10, 6:20, 7:00, 8:45, 10:00, 10:30 Fri-Tue 11:30, 12:10, 1:50, 3:00, 3:45, 5:25, 6:40, 7:20, 9:00, 10:30, 11:00 Wed 11:50, 3:30, 7:10, 11:00 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 2:15, 4:30, 5:50, 8:15, 9:30 Fri-Sun, Tue 1:00, 4:30, 8:15 Mon 2:50, 8:20 Wed 1:40, 5:15, 9:00 Holiday Inn Mon 7:00 Homefront (14A) Thu 1:20, 4:00 Fri-Tue 12:15, 2:50, 5:30, 8:10, 10:50 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 3:35, 6:55, 9:20, 10:20 Fri-Tue 12:20, 3:40, 7:05, 10:40 Wed 3:00, 6:30, 10:00 Justin Bieber’s Believe (PG) Wed 12:05, 2:35, 5:05, 7:35, 10:05 Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom (14A) Wed 11:30, 3:10, 6:50, 10:30 Out of the Furnace (14A) Thu 1:10, 4:05, 7:05, 10:05 Philomena (PG) Thu 1:45, 4:25, 7:10, 9:50 Fri-Tue 11:40, 2:10, 4:40, 7:10, 9:40 Wed 12:25 Saving Mr. Banks (PG) Thu 7:00, 10:10 Fri-Wed 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 10:25 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 11:35, 2:25, 5:20, 8:10, 11:00 Thor: The Dark World (PG) Thu 1:50 Thor: The Dark World 3D (PG) Thu 4:45, 7:35, 10:25 Tyler Perry’s A Madea Christmas (14A) Thu 5:00, 7:40, 10:15 Fri, Sun-Tue 1:30, 4:10, 6:55, 9:45 Sat 11:05, 1:40, 4:20, 6:55, 9:45 Wed 10:40 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) 12:00 Sat 11:20 mat Walking With Dinosaurs 3D (PG) Fri-Tue 2:30, 5:00, 7:30, 10:00 Wed 2:30, 5:00, 7:30, 9:55 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 12:45, 4:45, 8:45

Woodside Cinemas (I) 1571 Sandhurst Circle, 416-299-3456

Biriyani Fri-Wed 1:30, 4:30, 7:30, 10:30 Dhoom 3 Fri-Wed 12:00, 3:15, 6:30, 9:45 Endrendrum Punnagai Fri-Wed 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 10:15 R... Rajkumar (14A) Thu 4:00, 7:00 Ram-Leela (PG) Thu 4:00, 7:00 Thagaraaru Thu 4:00 Vidiyum Munn (14A) Thu 7:00

GTA Regions Mississauga

Coliseum Mississauga (CE) Square One, 309 Rathburn Rd W, 905-275-3456

47 Ronin 3D (PG) Wed 12:40, 4:10, 7:25, 10:30 American Hustle (14A) Thu 7:00, 10:40 Fri-Mon 12:30, 3:55, 7:20, 11:00 Tue 1:30, 5:00, 8:30 Wed 12:30, 3:55, 7:20, 10:45 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu 12:50, 2:10, 4:00, 5:05, 7:15, 8:00, 10:05, 10:55 Fri, Sun-Mon 12:50, 2:10, 3:50, 5:05, 6:55, 8:00, 10:00, 10:55 Sat 11:15, 12:50, 2:10, 3:50, 5:05, 6:55, 8:00, 10:00, 10:55 Tue 12:05, 12:50, 3:00, 3:50, 6:20, 7:10, 9:30, 10:00 Wed 12:50, 1:40, 3:50, 4:45, 6:55, 7:50, 10:00, 10:55 Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (G) Sat 11:00 Frozen (G) Thu 1:00, 4:10, 7:30 Fri, Sun-Wed 1:10 Sat 11:05, 1:50 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 12:30, 3:40, 6:50, 9:50 Fri, Sun-Mon 4:30, 7:30, 10:25 Sat 4:40, 7:30, 10:25 Tue 4:10, 7:05, 9:55 Wed 4:30, 7:30, 10:20 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu 12:40, 2:20, 4:30, 6:15, 8:20, 10:00 Fri, Sun-Tue 12:40, 1:20, 4:20, 5:20, 8:20, 9:20 Sat 12:40, 1:30, 4:20, 5:20, 8:20, 9:20 Wed 1:00, 5:00, 9:00

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug: An IMAX 3D Experience (PG) 12:00, 3:30, 7:10, 10:50 Thu 12:00 3:30 7:00 10:30 Tue only 12:00 3:25 6:50 10:15 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 1:20, 5:20, 9:20 Fri, Sun-Mon 2:45, 6:30, 10:20 Sat 11:10, 2:45, 6:30, 10:20 Tue 2:45, 6:30, 10:05 Wed 3:00, 6:40, 10:25 Holiday Inn Mon 7:00 Homefront (14A) Fri-Sat 1:00, 4:00, 6:50, 9:40 Sun 4:00, 6:50, 9:40 Mon 1:00, 4:00, 9:40 Tue 1:00, 4:00, 6:45, 9:40 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 12:10, 2:30, 3:50, 7:10, 10:45 Fri-Mon 12:10, 3:40, 7:15, 10:40 Tue 12:10, 3:30, 6:55, 10:10 Wed 12:15, 3:40, 7:05, 10:40 Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa (14A) Thu 10:35 Justin Bieber’s Believe (PG) Wed 12:00, 2:30, 5:15, 8:10, 11:00 The Nutcracker – Royal Opera House Encore Sun 12:55 Out of the Furnace (14A) Thu 12:15, 3:20, 6:30, 9:35 Saving Mr. Banks (PG) Fri-Mon 12:20, 3:35, 7:00, 10:15 Tue 12:30, 3:35, 7:00, 10:15 Wed 12:20, 3:35, 6:45, 10:10 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 12:10, 3:20, 6:30, 9:50 Thor: The Dark World (PG) Thu 12:20 Fri-Mon 12:15, 3:20, 6:40, 9:45 Tue 12:20, 3:20, 6:40, 9:45 Thor: The Dark World 3D (PG) Thu 3:45, 6:55, 10:20 Tyler Perry’s A Madea Christmas (14A) Thu 1:10, 4:20, 7:20, 10:10 Fri, Sun-Mon 12:00, 2:30, 5:00, 7:45, 10:35 Sat 11:50, 2:30, 5:00, 7:45, 10:35 Tue 1:40, 4:30, 7:15, 9:50 Wed 1:20, 4:20, 7:00, 9:40

Courtney Park 16 (CE)

110 Courtney Park E at Hurontario, 416-335-5323 47 Ronin 3D (PG) Wed 12:50, 3:45, 6:45, 9:35 American Hustle (14A) Thu 7:40, 10:40 Fri-Tue 12:45, 3:55, 7:05, 10:15 Wed 1:05, 4:10, 7:15, 10:20 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu 12:30, 2:00, 3:20, 4:50, 6:10, 7:40, 9:00, 10:30 Fri-Sat 1:00, 2:00, 3:50, 4:50, 6:40, 7:40, 9:30, 10:45 Sun-Tue 1:00, 2:00, 3:50, 4:50, 6:40, 7:40, 9:30, 10:30 Wed 12:10, 1:00, 2:00, 3:50, 4:50, 6:40, 7:45, 9:30, 10:35 The Best Man Holiday (14A) Thu 8:30 The Book Thief (PG) Thu 1:50, 4:45 Delivery Man (PG) Thu 2:10, 4:40 Dhoom 3 Fri-Wed 2:25, 6:05, 9:45 Dhoom: 3 The IMAX Experience Fri-Sat 12:00, 3:35, 7:10, 10:50 Sun-Wed 12:00, 3:35, 7:10, 10:45 Frozen (G) Thu 1:00, 3:30, 6:00 Fri-Wed 12:00 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 1:45, 4:15, 6:45, 9:15 Fri-Tue 2:35, 5:10, 7:45, 10:20 Wed 2:35, 5:10, 7:50 Grudge Match (14A) Wed 2:05, 4:45, 7:20, 10:05 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu 12:30, 1:25, 3:55, 4:50, 7:20, 8:15, 10:45 Fri-Tue 12:00, 1:30, 3:30, 5:00, 7:00, 8:30, 10:30 Wed 12:00, 3:30, 7:00, 10:30 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 12:00, 2:55, 3:25, 6:20, 6:50, 9:45, 10:15 Fri-Wed 12:30, 4:00, 7:30, 11:00 Homefront (14A) Thu 12:35, 3:05, 5:30, 7:55, 10:20 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire – The IMAX Experience (PG) Thu 1:15, 4:20, 7:25, 10:35 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 12:10, 3:15, 6:25, 9:30 Fri-Tue 12:05, 3:20, 6:35, 9:50 Wed 12:10, 3:40, 6:55, 10:10 Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom (14A) Wed 12:20, 3:55, 7:25, 10:50 Out of the Furnace (14A) Thu 12:55, 3:35, 6:55, 9:35 FriTue 12:00, 2:45, 5:30, 8:10, 10:55 Saving Mr. Banks (PG) Thu 7:10, 10:05 Fri-Tue 1:20, 4:20, 7:15, 10:10 Wed 12:15, 3:20, 6:30, 9:25 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 1:35, 4:20, 7:05, 9:50 Thor: The Dark World (PG) Thu 2:25 Fri-Tue 12:55 Thor: The Dark World 3D (PG) Thu 5:05, 7:45, 10:25 Fri-Tue 3:40, 6:25, 9:10 12 Years a Slave (14A) Fri-Tue 12:10, 3:15, 6:55, 9:55 Tyler Perry’s A Madea Christmas (14A) Thu 12:20, 2:45, 5:10, 7:35, 10:00 Fri-Tue 12:20, 2:50, 5:25, 7:55, 10:25 Wed 10:25 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri-Wed 12:05, 12:35 Walking With Dinosaurs 3D (PG) Fri-Wed 2:55, 5:15, 7:35, 10:00 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 3:00, 6:50, 10:40

SilverCity Mississauga (CE) Hwy 5, east of Hwy 403, 905-569-3373

About Time (14A) Thu 5:30, 8:20 The Book Thief (PG) Thu 4:30, 7:45 Fri-Mon 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 10:05 Tue 1:00, 4:00, 7:05 Wed 3:35, 6:45 Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs 2 3D (G) Thu 5:00, 7:20 The Counselor (14A) Thu 5:10, 7:50 Dallas Buyers Club (18A) Thu 4:50, 7:30 Fri-Mon 1:00, 3:45, 6:45, 10:00 Tue 12:45, 3:25, 6:35 Wed 3:50, 7:05, 9:50 Delivery Man (PG) Thu 5:15, 8:30 Fri-Mon 12:00, 2:40, 5:10, 7:45, 10:25 Tue 1:30, 4:15, 7:00 Wed 4:20, 7:30, 10:20 Free Birds (G) Thu 4:40 Fri-Mon 1:40, 4:20, 7:50, 10:15 Tue 12:35, 2:50, 4:55, 7:05 Grudge Match (14A) Wed 4:00, 5:00, 7:00, 7:45, 9:40, 10:30 Last Vegas (PG) Thu 5:35, 8:15 Fri-Mon 12:20, 2:50, 5:20, 8:00, 10:30 Tue 1:00, 3:45, 6:40 Wed 10:10 Prisoners (14A) Thu 4:30, 7:55 Saving Mr. Banks (PG) Thu 7:00 Fri-Mon 12:30, 1:30, 3:25, 4:30, 6:30, 7:35, 9:40, 10:30 Tue 12:30, 1:20, 3:40, 4:20, 6:45, 7:30 Wed 3:30, 4:10, 6:30, 7:15, 9:30, 10:25 12 Years a Slave (14A) Thu 4:45, 8:00 Fri-Mon 12:45, 4:05, 7:05, 10:10 Tue 12:15, 3:30, 6:55 Wed 3:45, 6:55, 10:00 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri-Mon 1:15, 4:00, 6:35, 9:10 Tue 12:55, 3:35, 6:20 Wed 3:30, 6:15, 9:00 Walking With Dinosaurs 3D (PG) Fri-Mon 12:15, 2:35, 5:00, 7:25, 9:45 Tue 12:00, 2:40, 5:10, 7:25 Wed 4:30, 7:20, 10:05

North Colossus (CE) Hwy 400 & 7, 905-851-1001

47 Ronin 3D (PG) Wed 11:25, 2:15, 5:05, 7:55, 11:10 American Hustle (14A) Thu 7:40, 10:35 Fri-Wed 12:50, 4:00, 7:15, 10:30 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu 3:55, 5:05, 7:05, 8:00, 9:50, 10:45 Fri-Sun 11:35, 1:15, 2:25, 4:15,

5:15, 7:05, 8:05, 10:00, 10:55 Mon-Tue 12:45, 1:45, 3:45, 4:45, 6:45, 7:45, 9:55, 10:45 Wed 11:05, 11:50, 1:55, 2:45, 4:45, 5:35, 7:35, 8:25, 10:25, 11:30 Dallas Buyers Club (18A) Thu 4:45, 7:35, 10:25 Fri-Tue 1:25, 4:20, 7:20, 10:20 Delivery Man (PG) Thu 4:35 Fri-Tue 1:20, 4:05, 6:50, 9:40 Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (G) Sat 11:00 Frozen (G) Thu 3:40, 6:25 Fri-Tue 11:45 Wed 11:00, 12:00 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 4:25, 7:10, 9:45 Fri-Tue 2:20, 4:45, 7:30, 10:05 Wed 2:40, 5:25, 8:00, 10:35 Gravity 3D (PG) Thu 3:15, 5:30 Fri-Tue 12:30, 2:50, 5:25, 7:50, 10:10 Wed 11:10, 1:30, 3:50, 6:15, 8:40, 11:00 Grudge Match (14A) Wed 11:30, 2:20, 5:20, 8:05, 11:15 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu 3:30, 5:10, 5:50, 7:00, 8:45, 9:30, 10:40 Fri-Tue 12:00, 1:30, 2:10, 3:30, 5:10, 5:50, 7:10, 8:45, 9:30, 10:45 Wed 12:15, 3:45, 7:20, 11:00 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug: An IMAX 3D Experience (PG) Thu 3:00, 6:30, 10:10 Fri-Tue 11:30, 3:00, 6:40, 10:15 Wed 11:40, 3:10, 6:40, 10:15 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 4:00, 4:30, 7:45, 8:15 Fri-Tue 1:00, 4:30, 8:15 Wed 1:45, 5:15, 8:40 Homefront (14A) Thu 3:05, 5:35, 8:00, 10:30 Fri-Tue 12:35, 3:05, 5:35, 7:55, 10:25 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 3:25, 4:10, 6:45, 7:30, 10:00, 10:45 Fri-Sun 12:40, 4:10, 7:35, 10:50 MonTue 11:50, 3:10, 6:35, 10:00 Wed 1:00, 4:15, 7:40, 11:15 Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa (14A) Thu 9:20 Justin Bieber’s Believe (PG) Wed 12:30, 2:55, 5:25, 7:50, 10:20 Last Vegas (PG) Fri-Sat, Mon-Tue 1:40, 4:25, 7:00, 9:50 Sun 4:25, 7:00, 9:50 Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom (14A) Wed 11:20, 2:50, 6:30, 10:00 The Nutcracker – Royal Opera House Encore Sun 12:55 Out of the Furnace (14A) Thu 4:15, 7:20, 10:20 Saving Mr. Banks (PG) Thu 7:15, 10:15 Fri-Tue 1:50, 4:40, 7:40, 10:40 Wed 11:10, 2:00, 4:50, 7:45, 10:55 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 11:45, 2:30, 5:30, 8:15, 11:25 Thor: The Dark World (PG) Fri-Sun 11:40 Mon-Tue 12:10 Thor: The Dark World 3D (PG) Thu 4:05, 6:55, 9:55 Fri-Sun 2:30, 5:20, 8:10, 11:00 Mon-Tue 3:20, 6:30, 9:35 Tyler Perry’s A Madea Christmas (14A) Thu 3:10, 5:40, 8:05, 10:35 Fri-Tue 12:25, 2:55, 5:30, 8:00, 10:35 Wed 12:40, 3:15, 5:45, 8:10, 11:05 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri, Sun 11:30, 12:15 Sat 11:25, 12:15 Mon-Tue 11:35, 12:15 Wed 11:00 Walking With Dinosaurs 3D (PG) Fri-Tue 2:35, 5:00, 7:25, 9:45 Wed 1:20, 3:40, 6:05, 8:30, 10:50 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 11:15, 12:20, 3:00, 4:20, 6:50, 8:20, 10:40

Interchange 30 (AMC)

30 Interchange Way, Hwy 400 & Hwy 7, 416-335-5323 Film Times unavailable at press time. Go to nowtoronto.com/movies for updates.

Rainbow Promenade (I)

Promenade Mall, Hwy 7 & Bathurst, 416-494-9371 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) 1:10, 3:55, 6:55, 9:30 The Book Thief (PG) Thu 1:05, 3:50, 6:40, 9:35 Frozen (G) 1:20, 4:05, 7:00, 9:20 Wed no 9:20 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 1:00, 1:30, 4:30, 5:00, 8:00, 9:30 Fri-Tue 1:00, 3:45, 4:30, 7:30, 8:00 Wed 1:00, 4:30, 8:00 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu-Tue 12:45, 3:45, 6:45, 9:45 Wed 9:25 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 1:05, 4:00, 7:05, 9:40 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri-Wed 12:55, 3:00, 5:05, 7:10, 9:15, 9:30 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 12:45, 4:20, 8:00

West Grande - Steeles (CE) Hwy 410 & Steeles, 905-455-1590

47 Ronin 3D (PG) Wed 4:25, 7:15, 10:05 American Hustle (14A) Fri-Sun 12:50, 4:00, 7:15, 10:30 Mon 12:30, 3:40, 6:55, 10:05 Tue 12:30, 3:40, 7:15 Wed 3:40, 6:55, 10:15 Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (PG) Thu 7:30, 10:20 Fri 1:40, 4:35, 7:30, 10:20 Sat-Sun 1:40, 4:35, 7:30, 10:25 Mon 1:40, 4:35, 7:30, 10:15 Tue 1:40, 4:35, 7:30 Wed 4:35, 7:30, 10:20 Delivery Man (PG) Thu 7:25, 10:05 Frozen (G) Fri-Sun 12:00 Mon-Tue 12:45 Frozen 3D (G) Thu 7:00, 9:45 Fri-Sun 2:40, 5:15, 7:50, 10:25 Mon 3:30, 6:45, 9:30 Tue 3:30, 7:10 Wed 4:00, 7:20 Grudge Match (14A) Wed 3:50, 7:35, 10:25 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 3D (PG) Thu 6:45, 10:15 Fri-Sun 12:00, 3:30, 7:00, 10:30 Mon 12:00, 3:25, 6:50, 10:15 Tue 12:00, 3:25, 7:00 Wed 3:30, 7:00, 10:30 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (PG) Thu 7:30, 8:00 Fri-Mon 1:00, 2:00, 4:30, 5:30, 8:00, 9:40 Tue 12:45, 2:00, 4:15, 5:30, 7:45 Homefront (14A) Thu 7:45, 10:15 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG) Thu 6:45, 7:55, 9:55 Fri-Sun 12:10, 3:25, 6:55, 10:15 Mon 12:05, 3:25, 6:55, 10:05 Tue 12:05, 3:25, 7:00 Wed 10:10 Saving Mr. Banks (PG) Fri-Mon 1:20, 4:10, 7:05, 10:00 Tue 1:20, 4:10, 7:05 Wed 4:10, 7:05, 10:00 The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (PG) Wed 4:55, 7:45, 10:30 Thor: The Dark World (PG) Fri-Tue 12:20 Thor: The Dark World 3D (PG) Thu 7:20, 10:10 Fri-Mon 3:35, 7:20, 10:10 Tue 3:35, 7:20 Walking With Dinosaurs (PG) Fri-Tue 12:15 Walking With Dinosaurs 3D (PG) Fri-Mon 2:35, 5:00, 7:25, 9:45 Tue 2:35, 5:00, 7:25 Wed 5:00, 7:25, 9:45 The Wolf of Wall Street (18A) Wed 4:15, 8:15 3

indie&rep film complete festivals, independent and How to find a listing

Repertory cinema listings are comprehensive and appear alphabetically by venue, then by date. Other films are listed by date. = Critics’ pick (highly recommended) ñ F indicates Festive events

How to place a listing

All listings are free. Send to: movies@nowtoronto.com, fax to 416-364-1166 or mail to Rep Cinemas, NOW Magazine, 189 Church, Toronto M5B 1Y7. Include film title, year of release, names of director(s), language and subtitle info, venue, address, time, cost and advance ticket sales if any, phone number for reservations/info or website address. Deadline is the Thursday before publication at 5 pm.

Cinemas big picture cinema gerrard 1035 gerrard e. bigpicturecinema.com

thu 19-wed 25 – Check website for schedule.

BLOOR hot docs Cinema

506 Bloor W. 416-637-3123. bloorcinema.com

Thu 19 – The Prime Ministers: The Pioneers

(2013) D: Richard Trank. 6:30 pm. Blood Brother (2013) D: Steve Hoover.

9 pm.

fri 20 – Maidentrip ñ (2013) D: Jillian

Frank Capra. 12:30 pm. Studio Ghibli: Porco Rosso (1992) D: Hayao Miyazaki. 3:30 pm.

David Cronenberg: Scanners (1981). 5:45 pm.

Studio Ghibli: Pom Poko (1994) D: Isao Takahata. 8:15 pm. mon 23 – Studio Ghibli X 3: Spirited Away (2001) D: Hayao Miyazaki. 1 pm. The Cat Re­ turns (2002) D: Hiroyuki Morita. 4 pm. Whis­ per Of The Heart (1995) D: Yoshifumi Kondo.

6 pm. David Cronenberg: Naked Lunch (1991) 8:45 pm. tue 24 – Studio Ghibli X 3: Pom Poko. 1 pm.

Howl’s Moving Castle. 4 pm. Princess Mono­ noke (1997) D: Hayao Miyazaki. 7 pm. wed 25 – Studio Ghibli X 3: My Neighbor Totoro. 2 pm. Kiki’s Delivery Service.

4:15 pm. From Up On Poppy Hill (2011) D: Goro Miyazaki. 6:45 pm.

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2236 Queen E. 416-691-7330. foxtheatre.ca

Thu 19 – Muscle Shoals (2013) D: Greg “­Freddy” Camalier. 7 pm. Diana (2013) ñ D: Oliver­Hirschbiegel. 9:15 pm.

Fri 20-sat 21 – Ender’s Game (2013) D: Gavin Hood. 2 pm. Enough Said (2013) D: Nicole Holofcener. 4:15 & 7 pm. The Counselor (2013) D: Ridley Scott. 9 pm. sun 22 – Ender’s Game. 2 pm. The Counselor.

4:15 & 9 pm. Enough Said. 7 pm.

Mon 23 – The Counselor. 7 pm. Enough Said.

9:15 pm. tue 24-wed 25 – Closed.

GRAHAM SPRY THEATRE

ontario science centre

ñ ñ

1028 Queen W. 416-530-0011. camerabar.ca

Fsat 21 – How The Grinch Stole Christmas!

(1966) D: Chuck Jones and Ben Washam, and Home Alone (1990) D: Chris Columbus. 3 pm.

cinematheque tiff bell ­lightbox

reitman square, 350 king w. 416-599-8433, tiff.net

thu 19 – Studio Ghibli: Kiki’s Delivery Service (1989) D: Hayao Miyazaki. 6:30 ñ pm. David Cronenberg: Rabid (1977). 9 pm. fri 20 – Studio Ghibli X 3: Nausicaä Of The Valley Of The Wind (1984) D: Hayao ñ Miyazaki. 1 pm. Howl’s Moving Castle (2004)

D: Hayao Miyazaki. 3:45 pm. Grave Of The Fireflies (1988) D: Isao Takahata. 6:30 pm.

Coen Brothers: True Grit (2010). 9 pm.

Fsat 21 – A Christmas Carol (1951) D: Brian Desmond Hurst. 2 pm. Studio Ghibli – Hayao Miyazaki X 2: My Neighbor Totoro (1988) 4:30 pm; Spirited Away (2001) 7 pm.

Body Horror: The Thing (1982) D: John Carpenter. 10 pm.

Fsun 22 – It’s A Wonderful Life (1946) D:

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Jared Leto’s turn as an HIV-positive transsexual in Dallas Buyers Club ­impressed T.O. critics.

Fox Theatre

CBC Museum, CBC Broadcast Centre, 250 Front W, 416-205Schlesinger. 4:15 & 5574. cbc.ca 6:30 pm. Blood thu 19-wed 25 – ContinuBrother. 8:45 pm. ous screenings ­Monday to Fsat 21 – The Friday, 9 am to 5 pm.

Prime Ministers: Closed Dec 25. Free.

The Pioneers. 1 Thu 19-fri 20 AND mon pm. Blood Brother.

23-tue 24 – Holiday season 3:45 pm. Maiden­ and winter preview. trip. 6:15 pm.­ Jingle Bell Rocks!

(2013) D: Mitchell Kezin. 8:45 pm. sun 22 – Maiden­ 770 Don Mills. 416-696-3127. trip. 1 & 6 pm. The ­ontariosciencecentre.ca Prime Ministers: Delightful My Neighbor Totoro screens The Pioneers. 3:15 thu 19-fri 20 – Great pm. Blood Brother. at the Lightbox Dec 21 and 25. White Shark. 11 am, 1 & 3 8:30 pm. pm. Under The Sea. Noon & 4 pm. Flight Of The Butterflies. 2 pm.

Fmon 23 – White Christmas (1954) D: Michael Curtiz. 1 pm. A Christmas Story Sat 21-sun 22 – Great White Shark. 11 am, 1 & (1983) D: Bob Clark. 4 pm. Home Alone (1990) 3 pm. Under The Sea. Noon & 4 pm. Flight Of D: Chris Columbus. 6:30 pm. Die Hard (1988) The Butterflies. 2 pm.

D: John McTiernan. 9 pm. All screenings free. mon 23 – Great White Shark. 11 am, 1 & 3 Tue 24 – Closed. pm. Flight Of The Butterflies. 2 pm. Under The Sea. Noon & 4 pm.

Wed 25 – Maidentrip. 4 pm. 2013 Cannes Lions Awards: The Worlds Best tue 24 – Great White Shark. 11 am, 1 pm.

Commercials. 6:15 pm. Muscle Shoals (2013) Flight Of The Butterflies. 2 pm. Under The D: Greg “Freddy­” Camalier. 9 pm.

Sea. Noon. wed 25 – Closed.

Camera Bar

repertory schedules

Toronto film critics weigh in The Toronto Film Critics Association named Inside Llewyn Davis the best picture of 2013, with star Oscar Isaac winning best actor.

Joel and Ethan Coen’s seriocomic study of a folksinger in 1961 Green­wich Village was also a runner-up for the TFCA’s best director and screenplay prizes, which were awarded to Alfonso Cuarón for Gravity and Spike Jonze for Her, respectively.

(Full disclosure: I am the vice-president and secretary of the TFCA.) Cate Blanchett was named best actress for her work as a disintegrating woman of means in Woody

BEST PICTURE: Inside Llewyn Davis (Runners-up: Her; 12 Years A Slave)

BEST ACTOR: Oscar Isaac, Inside Llewyn Davis (Runners-up: Chiwetel Ejiofor, 12 Years A Slave; Matthew McConau­ ghey, Dallas Buyers Club)

BEST ACTRESS:

463 Bathurst. 416-603-6643.

Cate Blanchett, Blue Jasmine (Runners-up: Julie Delpy, Before Midnight; Greta Gerwig, Frances Ha)

ence Brown. 4 pm. sat 21 – Silents: The Wind (1928) D: Victor Sjöström. 4 pm. The Best Of The Sex & Violence Cartoon Festival. 7 pm. sun 22 – Silents: The Racket (1982) D: Lewis Milestone. Jane Jacobs: Urban Wisdom (2007) D: Don Alexander. 6 pm. Kid Dracula: Nosferatu (1922) D: FW Murnau, with the soundtrack of Radiohead’s Kid. 7 pm.

Mon 23 – Silents: Beau Geste (1926) D: Herbert Brenon. 4 pm. Apocalypse Now Redux (1979) D: Francis Ford Coppola. 7 pm. tue 24 – Silents: The Kid (1921) D: Charles Chaplin. 4 pm. Alice In The Wall: Alice In Wonderland (1933) D: Norman Z McLeod, with soundtrack from Pink Floyd’s The Wall.

5:30 pm. Darkside Of Oz: The Wizard Of Oz (1939) D: Victor Fleming, with soundtrack from Pink Floyd’s Darkside Of The Moon. 7 pm. Pink Floyd: The Wall (1982) D: Gerald Scarfe. 9 pm. continued on page 84 œ

Killing, directed by Joshua Oppenheimer, Christine Cynn and anony­mous Indonesian collaborators, won the BMO Allan King Documentary Award, which carries a $5,000 prize.

The TFCA also named the three finalists for the Rogers Best Canadian Film Award: The Dirties, directed by Matt Johnson; Gabrielle, directed by Louise Archambault, and Watermark, directed by Jennifer Baichwal and Edward Burtynsky. The award carries a cash prize of $100,000; the winner will be announced at a gala awards dinner on January 7, 2014.

TFCA winners and runners-up:

reg hartt’s cineforum thu 19 – Flesh And The Devil (1925) D: Clar-

Allen’s Blue Jasmine; supporting prizes went to Jared Leto in Dallas Buyers Club and Jennifer Lawrence in American Hustle.

Best first feature was awarded to Kleber Mendonça Filho’s Neighboring Sounds, which explores class tensions in an elite apartment complex in the Brazilian city of Recife, while best animated feature went to Hayao Miyazaki’s The Wind Rises, a fictional­ized biography of Jiro Hori­koshi, the designer of the Mitsubishi Zero.

A Touch Of Sin, Jia Zhang-ke’s searing condemnation of contemporary Chinese society, was named best foreign-language film. And The Act Of

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR: Jared Leto, Dallas Buyers Club (Runners-up: Michael Fassbender, 12 Years A Slave; James Franco, Spring Breakers)

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS: Jennifer Lawrence, American Hustle (Runners-up: Lupita Nyong’o, 12 Years A Slave; June Squibb, Nebraska)

BEST DIRECTOR: Alfonso Cuarón, ­Gravity (Runners-up: Joel and Ethan Coen,

I­ nside Llewyn Davis; Steve McQueen, 12 Years A Slave)

BMO ALLAN KING DOCUMENTARY AWARD:

BEST SCREENPLAY, ADAPTED OR ­ORIGINAL:

The Act of Killing (Runners-up: Leviathan; Tim’s ­Vermeer)

Spike Jonze, Her (Runners-up: Richard Linklater, Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy, Before Midnight; Joel and Ethan Coen, Inside Llewyn Davis)

ROGERS BEST CANADIAN FILM AWARD FINALISTS: The Dirties; Gabrielle; Watermark NORMAN WILNER

BEST FIRST FEATURE: Neighboring Sounds, directed by Kleber Mendonça Filho (Runners-up: Fruitvale Station, directed by Ryan Coogler; In a World …, directed by Lake Bell)

BEST ANIMATED FEATURE: The Wind Rises (Runners-up: The Croods; Frozen)

BEST FOREIGNLANGUAGE FILM: A Touch Of Sin (Runners-up: Blue Is The Warmest ­Color; The Hunt)

Cate Blanchett (with Peter Sarsgaard) got best actress honours for Blue Jasmine.

NOW december 19-25 2013

83

indie&rep film œcontinued from page 83

wed 25 – Silents: The Merry Widow (1925) D: Erich Von Stroheim. 4 pm. The Phantom Of The Opera (1925) D: Lon Chaney. 5 pm.

The Unknown Chaplin (1983) D: Kevin Brownlow. 7 pm.

revue cinema

400 Roncesvalles. 416-531-9959. ­revuecinema.ca

Thu 19 – Creepy Christmas X 2: The Exorcist (2000 Version) (1973) D: William ñ Friedkin. 6:45 pm. Black Christmas (1974) D: Bob Clark. 9:30 pm.

Fri 20 – Ender’s Game (2013) D: Gavin Hood.

1:30 pm. About Time (2013) D: Richard Curtis. 4 & 7 pm. Muscle Shoals (2013) D: Greg “­Freddy” Camalier. 9:30 pm.

Fsat 21 – Miracle On 34th Street (1947) D: George Seaton. 2 pm. Ender’s Game. 4 pm. About Time. 7 pm. The Counselor (2013) D: Ridley Scott. 9:30 pm.

Fsun 22 – It’s A Wonderful LIfe (1946) D: Frank Capra. 1:30 pm. About Time. 4 & 7 pm. Muscle Shoals. 9:30 pm. mon 23 – Muscle Shoals. 7 pm. The Counselor. 9:15 pm.

Tue 24-Wed 25 – Closed.

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the royal 608 College. 416-466-4400. theroyal.to

Thu 19 – All Is Lost (2013) D: JC Chandor. 7 pm.

Kill Your Darlings (2013) D: John Krokidas.

9:15 pm.

Ffri 20 – Lethal Weapon (1987) D: Richard Donner. 7 pm. Gremlins (1984) D: Joe Dante.

9 pm. Friday Late Nights: Silent Night Deadly Night (1984) D: Charles E Sellier Jr. 11:30 pm.

Fsat 21 – The Polar Express (2004) D: Robert Zemeckis. 2 pm. Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale (2011) D: Jalmari Helander. 7 pm. Everything Is Terrible Holiday Special (found footage video collage screening). 9 pm.

Fsun 22 – Gremlins. 2 pm. Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale. 7 pm. Elf (2003) D: Jon Favreau. 9 pm.

Fmon 23 – The Dirty Christmas Show. See comedy listings, this issue. 8 pm.

Tue 24-wed 25 – Closed.

ñ ñ

other films thu 19-tue 24 – The CN Tower presents Legends Of Flight 3D. Continuous screenings daily 9 am-8 pm. Closed Dec 25. 301 Front W. 416-868-6937, c­ ntower.ca.

Casa Loma presents The P­ ellatt Newsreel (2006) D: Barbra Cooper, a film and permanent exhibit on the history of Casa Loma and Henry Pellatt. Daily screenings 10 am4:30 pm. Closing Dec 24 at 1 pm, closed Dec 25. Included w/ admission. 1 ­Austin Terrace.

416-923-1171, ­casaloma.org.

The Hockey Hall of Fame presents Stanley’s Game Seven 3D, a film of Stanley Cup history. Plays daily at the top of and half past each hour. Mon-Sat 9:30 am-6 pm, Sun 10 am-6 pm. Closed Dec 25. Included w/ admission. Brookfield Place, 30 Yonge. hhof.com. thu 19 – Barbara Frum Library presents Great Expectations (2012) D: Mike Newell. 2 pm. Free. 20 Covington. 416-395-5440.

Ffri 20 – Jane & Dundas Library presents Love Actually (2003) D: Richard Curtis. 2:30 pm. Free. 416-304-1085.

3

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Every DVD & Blu-ray you desire is available here!

Sales & Rentals 1172 BAY STREET Just South of Bloor

416.964.9088 baystreetvideo.com

84

december 19-25 2013 NOW

blu-ray/dvd Prisoners (WB,

2013) D: Denis Villeneuve, w/ Hugh Jackman, Jake Gyllenhaal.

Rating: NNNN; Blu-ray package: NN Prisoners is a strong, believable, characterdriven thriller that goes places most thrillers don’t even dream of.

Two little girls disappear from a ­suburban street. Loki (Jake Gyllenhaal), the detective on the case, arrests a suspect, Alex Jones (Paul Dano), but releases him; there’s no evidence, and Jones seems incapable of the crime. But Keller (Hugh Jackman), one of the girls’ fathers, insists on Jones’s guilt and begins to stalk him. Another suspect emerges, but Keller’s certainty does not waver.

Keller is an alpha male type. It’s easy to see him either as a man driven to extremes to protect his family or as rage-fuelled and out of control.

Loki is quieter but just as strong and driven.

Neither Jackman nor Gyllenhaal plays for likeability, and the question of Jones’s guilt or innocence remains unanswered until the end. The supporting cast – Maria Bello, as Keller’s wife, Terrence Howard and Viola Davis, the other couple, and Melissa Leo, Jones’s aunt – all give equally committed performances in vital roles.

The first of the two making-of interviews features Jackman, Gyllenhaal and director Denis Villeneuve commenting on Keller and Loki’s relationship. The second covers the rest of the cast, and both offer a few snippets of insight.

EXTRAS Two making-of interview sets. English, French, Spanish audio and subtitles.

Adore (Remstar,

2013) D: Anne Fontaine, w/ Naomi Watts, Robin Wright.

Rating: NNNN; DVD package: none Two women begin affairs with each other’s sons, but Adore isn’t the art porn it sounds like.

Director Anne Fontaine is after the emotional ramifications, and gives the sweaty bits only enough time to make their narrative points.

Lil (Naomi Watts) and Roz (Robin Wright) are lifelong best friends and close neighbours. They live now where they grew up together, by a beautiful Australian bay. When their strong, handsome sons (Xavier Samuel, James Frecheville) reach 19 or so, one makes a play for the other’s mother and is accepted. The other, moved by jealousy, takes his own shot. All four are uneasy at having crossed a line of some sort but con-

Ñ

tinue until inevitable developments begin to take their toll.

Watts and Wright are both adept at revealing unspoken feelings, and Watts’s emotional vulnerability plays well against Wright’s more stolid, thoughtful presence, making their friendship believable and deep. Samuel and Frecheville convey a mix of uncertainty and cockiness that ensures the situation cannot remain stable.

Fontaine lets events unfold without comment or sensationalism, and leaves the ending open in a way that’s unsatisfying to melodrama seekers but perfectly appropriate to the story.

There is no commentary or making-of doc, but the shoot looks straightforward and the movie invites you to draw your own conclusions.

EXTRAS English, French audio and subtitles.

By ANDREW DOWLER

disc of the week

Kick-Ass 2 (Universal, 2013) D: Jeff

Wadlow, w/ Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Chloë Grace Moretz. Rating: NNNN; Blu-ray package: NNN

Ghost Team One (Paramount, 2013) D: Ben Peyser, Scott Rutherford, w/ Carlos Santos, J.R. Villarreal. Rating: N; Blu-ray package: N

If you’re massively baked, you may get a laugh from Ghost Team One’s amateurish hijinks, but everyone else will likely sit in stony silence, possibly mourning the waste of an odd idea.

On the same night that they discover their house is haunted, two guys (Carlos Santos, J.R. Villarreal) go after the same girl (Meghan Falcone), who gets hot at the thought of ghosts.

The ghost turns out to be that of a once-famed high-end hooker, now horny from beyond the grave.

The trio decide to make a documentary.

The faux doc and occasional security cam film provide the usual crappy found-footage visuals, the comedy focuses largely on wanking and the

Kick-Ass 2 is almost exactly as much fun as the first one.

The violence is a little less brutal, and badass masked avenger Hit-Girl is inherently less funny as a teen than as the 11-year-old of the first film. But the tone, jokes and metafictional critique of the superhero action are otherwise all in place.

A couple of years after the original ends, high-schooler Dave Lizewski (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) still patrols the streets as crime-fighting Kick-Ass, but Hit-Girl (Chloë Grace Moretz) has given up vigilantism to try normal life in school. Meanwhile, guys’ witless dick-centric banter, and the acting relies on yelling. Eventually, a climax emerges that feels like it belongs in a different, equally bad movie.

The extras’ on-set footage is shot through a camera strapped to a small

Aaron Taylor-­Johnson and Chloë Grace Moretz are back to kick more ass.

spoiled brat gangster’s son Chris D’Amico (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) turns super-villain under the name The Motherfucker and assembles an army of psycho killers.

John Leguizamo and Jim Carrey add sharp comedy to the proceedings, and the monumental Olga Kurkulina turns in one of the most impressive villains in recent memory.

The commentary shared by Taylor-Johnson, Moretz, Mintz-Plasse and di­rector Jeff Wadlow is a listenable mix of jokes and production stories.

EXTRAS Cast and director commentary, five-part making-of doc, more. English, French, Spanish audio and subtitles. dog. The results are on a par with the movie.

EXTRAS On-set footage, deleted scenes, bloopers, video diary. English, French, Spanish, Portuguese ­audio and subtitles.

3 movies@nowtoronto.com

ON DEMAND THIS WEEK

ON ROGERS

ON BELL

ON iTUNES

ON NETFLIX

The Lone Ranger (2013) Comic adventure in the Old West with Johnny Depp as Tonto, the hero’s companion.

Aftershock (2012) Tourists try to escape a Chilean nightclub buried in a massive earthquake.

Hours (2013) The late Paul Walker stars as a man battling to keep his newborn daughter alive amid the chaos of Hurricane ­Katrina.

Maniac (2012) Tale of a mannequin-obsessed serial killer told from the slasher’s point of view.

= Critics’ Pick nnnnn = Must have nnNn = Keeper nnn = Renter nn = Coaster n = Skeet

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By Matt Jones ©2013 Jonesin’ Crosswords editor@jonesincrosswords.com 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 18 22 24

25 27 28 29 31 33 34 36 37

32 Nobel Peace Center city 35 Scenic fly-fishing activity (one hour behind)?

40 Cookie in pie crusts 41 Drone, for instance 42 Frozen drink company with a polar bear mascot 43 The key elixir (one hour behind)?

46 Short footrace 47 PayPal co-founder ___ Musk 48 Electronics co. whose slogan was once “So Real” 49 Baseball stat 52 “Carmina Burana” composer 54 2,640 feet 58 Bird in the constellation

Source: PMB Fall 2013, National 18+

Employment

Crossword Puzzle

ACROSS 1 “Armageddon” author Leon 5 Mos Def collaborator Kweli 10 Drains, as of energy 14 Jazz great Thelonious 15 Crack up 16 “___ se habla espaÒol” 17 Guy who avoids fighting (one hour behind)?

19 Litter critter 20 Bite-size 21 Handy children’s game 23 Advance 26 Deep sleep 27 Consumer protection org.

30 On the Caribbean, poetically

}

386,000 Print Readers Weekly.

Aquila 62 Retail chain that offers meatballs 63 Airline hanging on the edge (three hours ahead)?

66 Takes for a ride 67 Suitcase attachment 68 Kernel 69 Slip or square follower 70 “Gee, that’s swell!”

71 Places for peels DOWN 1 Strike callers 2 Go outside the service area 3 ___ Empire 4 Technique 5 Mai ___ (bar order) 6 “Breaking Bad” network

38 39 44 45 50 51 53 54 55 56 57 59 60 61 64 65

Coal unit Late singer Hayes Japanese box lunch Snidely stated, perhaps Pastel shade of blue Jello Biafra’s genre Web presence Ice cream concoction Singer/songwriter Tori Beijing Olympic gold medalist sprinter ___ Powell “Elysium” director Blomkamp College VIP Disinterested “The ___ Vista Social Club” Hayao Miyazaki genre Allowed How hair may sometimes stand “Hold it right there, buster!”

“The Voice” judge/coach Green Intense devotion Person who’ll argue about Windows vs. Linux Baba au ___ Derive by reasoning Promotional gimmick Former Washington senator ___ Gorton Viper features The ___ from French Lick (Larry Bird) “Konvicted” hip-hop artist Joking Jay Shakira’s “___ Noche Voy Contigo” Golf lesson subject Maggie’s sister CPR experts Skin design, briefly Star’s propulsion, maybe?

to act as patients for practical sonography school.

NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY 416-440-6139

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drivers/delivery

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Experienced Newspaper Drivers

416.364.3444

Wanted for various delivery routes in GTA. Must supply vehicle with gross cargo capacity of 1,000 kgs.

Driver abstract required.

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career training

research studies RESEARCH SUBJECTS NEEDED

Do you smoke cannabis every week?

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Looking for a skills upgrade or second career that you can take pride in? Toronto Image Works offers full-time diploma programs in Digital Publishing and Web. » Instructor led » Small classes, hands on » Real world environment

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solution in next week’s classifieds

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+

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ATTENTION RECRUITERS! Buy a recruitment ad in NOW Classifieds and receive a Contact your NOW Classified Sales Rep @ 416.364.3444 nowtoronto.com/classifieds FREE posting on TorontoJobs.ca – The Greater Toronto Area’s leading recruitment source.

NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

85

Employment & Careers

Rentals & Real Estate

research studies

accommodations

studio for rent

EARN UP TO $7500!

Family/friends visiting?

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Are you a Healthy Person between 18 and 55 years of age?

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YOU WILL BE PAID upon completion of the study Compensation may range from $1000 to $7500 depending on the length of the study

FULL NEW RENOVATIONS

1 bdrm on 1st fl. of hse, 1000 sq. ft., near ttc, shops, park, sep. ent., Lndry, d/w. $1600 all incl., avail.

Jan. 1st Call Aldo 416-621-7728

Holiday Move-in Heart of Leslieville. Queen and Logan. 2 bdrm apt. completely

reno'd, $1,400+ hydro. Wont last.

Call Steve 289-597-8253 swolk@rogers.com Happy Holidays.

Keele and St. Clair 300- 25,000 sq.ft. High ceilings , skylights, hardwood, Suit artists, photographers, woodworkers etc. $1 per foot per month.

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open house gallery

Sales Reps/Brokers

We NOW readers.

Submit your FREE Open House Gallery listings by Tuesday at 3:00 p.m. Add a MLS photo for an extra $35 gst included. Fax:416-364-1433 or email beve@nowtoronto.com

Keele and Dundas Nice work studio with sink, power/window 800 square feet. $850 per month 905-271-2001 others

movers !

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nished Basement bachelor close to shops, cafes & TTC. Separate entrance. Full kitchen, bathroom & laundry room. Fully furnished (including queen sized bed). Quiet residential neighbourhood. Utilities inc.

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to share

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˘

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Bloor / Lansdowne

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Jan. 1st. Call 647-808-7788 or 416-535-6622

Jeta Moving 416-410-5382

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offices Queen Street West Prime professional office space for lease 1 block west of university ave.

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Dan The Moving Man ANY SIZE! FAST! SAME DAY DELIVERY! $29HR & UP

647-763-5257

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$MBTTJGJFET 86

DECEMBER 19-25 2013 NOW

416.364.3444 nowtoronto.com/classifieds

Health + General + Music ˘ Take it

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massage therapy musicians wanted

LAST WEEK’S SOLUTION

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*** For non-sexual massage and health practitioners only.

automobiles UP TO $3500 A1A Best Price For Any Scrap Car. Fast Free Tow 24/7 Call 416-303-8881

Chris Lord Ideal New Years at Lola 40 Kensington with his real Rythm section No cover!

Jammers will be starting early will be a good time!

Full Line Peavey & B.C. Rich Dealer.

Busters Music, 932 Bloor St. West 416-536-2274 www.torontobusters.com Located near Ossington Subway

Silver Dollar Dec. 27th Benefit for Hurricane Relief with Jon Long review at 12pm., 486 Spadina ave.

Vocalists Wanted for Electronic Music

We are house music producers and independent record label owners looking for various vocalists Willing to pay based on experience. If you have any questions please feel free to contact us at peter71@rocketmail.com for further information.

Thank You Kindly

singles

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M

Web Directory FELINE & CANINE SPAY/NEUTER SERVICE Please call 416.392.2273 to book an appointment.

WWW.SANDALMAN.COM

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HOLIDAY YOGA BAG SALE Leather bags. reg. $200. Now $150. (16 units left). Faux Leather. Reg. $150. Now $75. JACKET REPAIR SALE. Reline and Recondition combo.

20% OFF. We also do alterations, replace zippers & buckles, reupholster leather furniture restore vintage items and make custom belts.

Serving Toronto since 1982! Mentioned in NOW's Best of Toronto.

First-Aid for Leather - Bring us your Sick Leather 416-533-6-335

Clinics located in Scarborough and Peterborough.

www.animalalliance.ca Committed to the protection of all animals.

www.hemptimes.com Articles & features on industrial hemp, hemp issues, clothing, etc...

www.rabble.ca Canada's irreverent news website, covering independent news since 2001.

www.canadianseedexchange.com 150 Cannabis Seeds, Salvia Extracts, Mushrooms & other sacred herbs.

66 Wellesley St E 3rd Fl Toronto ON M4Y 1G2, 416-850-3795, Downtown

www.veg.ca Toronto Vegetarian Assoc. All the info you need to go vegetarian!

Volunteer Opportunities of the Week

VOLUNTEER TORONTO CONNECTS PEOPLE TO THOUSANDS OF VOLUNTEER OPPORTUNITIES AND PROVIDES SUPPORT TO TORONTO’S NON-PROFIT ORGANIZATIONS. FIND THESE AND OTHER OPPORTUNITIES AT

www.volunteertoronto.ca

College-Montrose Children’s Place a downtown nonprofit that supports healthy child development, needs an Office Assistant to help out with data entry and general office duties. Volunteer must be comfortable working with Microsoft Office, including Word, Excel, and Access, as well as have some experience with Sumac. Volunteer is needed on Tuesdays from 9AM to 12PM. Age 18+. Police check required.

Contact Filomena: fcosta@cmcp.ca.

Classifieds

Rogers Raising The Grade is an interactive after-school program that allows youth to explore career interests and receive homework support while increasing their digital literacy.

East Scarborough Boys and Girls Club is looking for Mentors to guide young people through the program. Tues, Wed, Fri evenings from 5.30-7.30pm. Kingston/Galloway.

Contact Michelle: mjoseph@esbgc.org

everything goes. in print & online.

416 364 3444 • nowtoronto.com/classifieds

Humber Community Seniors’ Services seeks friendly and reliable drivers to hit the road delivering hot meals to seniors and disabled adults in the Weston/Mt. Dennis area. Drivers will partner with food runners to provide meals on weekdays from 10:30 to 12:30. Age 18+. Min 2 hours per week. Police check and valid Drivers License required. Contact Cecilia: sarmiento@humberseniors.org.

Warden Woods Community Centre seeks four new board members with Legal, Financial, and Communications experience. Volunteer members would contribute to fundraising and event planning efforts to support the diverse Scarborough community. Duties also include attending monthly board meetings and serving on various committees. Full orientation provided. 8 hours per month, min 2 year commitment. Age 25+. Contact Jean: jeanh@wardenwoods.com.

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NOW DECEMBER 19-25 2013

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Savage Love

By Dan Savage

NYC-​based conceptual artist behind the amazing Cliteracy project, was a guest on my podcast recently. (To hear our conversation, go to savagelovecast. com and look up episode 371.) During our chat, Wallace told me that a column I wrote years ago about the importance of the clit had a big impact on her as a teenager. In fact, she still had the copy of the column that she had clipped out of the newspaper. I’m reprinting that column this week for three solid reasons: ignorance about the clit is still rampant (hence the importance of Wallace’s work); reprinting the column allows me to plug Wallace’s work (check it out at sophiawallace. com); and it’s Christmas and I’m taking the week off. For newer readers: letter writers addressed me as “Hey, Faggot” for the first few years. These days, of course, only my husband talks to me that way. Happy New Year!

The clitoris is the key Hey, Faggot: My question involves my resent girlfriend and ex-​girlfriend, as p I’ve had the same problem with both.

Both say I am a good lover. Lovemaking sessions have lasted hours. However, neither could have an orgasm via intercourse alone. They can each come in a second by masturbation, and in minutes from oral sex. They say they’ve come very close during intercourse with me. They also say I shouldn’t worry. But if I didn’t worry about it, wouldn’t I be one of those guys women complain about all the time? I’m beginning to get a complex. I wonder what I’m doing wrong. I wonder if they would be more satisfied if they were with someone better endowed. During intercourse, I feel myself becoming discouraged: I think that she will never enjoy this as much as I do, and sometimes these thoughts have caused me to go soft in the middle of the act. Please tell me what to do.

Brooklyn Hey, Brooklyn: Your desire not to be “one of those guys women complain about all the time” is commendable, but it would be more so if you’d bothered to educate yourself about women’s bodies and women’s orgasms before you started fucking women.

News flash: Most women are unable to “have an orgasm via intercourse alone.”

Why is this? Because the business end of the clitoris – which plays as central a role in her sexual pleasure as the head of your cock plays in yours – is located outside and above the vagina, not inside and up it. Are you with me? The clitoris is not a joy buzzer at the top of the vaginal canal. It doesn’t matter how big your dick is, how hard your dick is or how far you manage to get it in (okay, those things do matter, but not for the sake of this argument): the clit’s the thing!

While some women’s clits are angled in such a way that bumping and grinding provides enough direct clitoral stimulation to get them off, most are not so conveniently angled, and you actually have to go out of your way to make her orgasms happen. It never ceases to amaze me just how many heterosexual men don’t know these basic vagifacts. But you needn’t take my word for it. According to Cosmo – my reference for all ques-

tions regarding female anatomy, sexual response and makeup – fully 70 per cent of women need stimulation above and beyond vaginal intercourse in order to achieve orgasm.

Imagine the flip side, Brooklyn: your new girlfriend pays no attention to the head of your cock during sex; the most she can be bothered to do is provide you with a little “indirect stimulation.” Maybe she nudges the side of your dick with her foot while you eat her to orgasm after orgasm. While you might enjoy this activity (especially if you’re a foot fetishist), it probably won’t get you off. You’re having fun, you’re enjoying yourself, but you’re not having orgasms. Eventually, you pull your slimy face out of her crotch and ask for some direct cock-​head stimulation. Your girlfriend recoils in horror.

She insists that all her previous boyfriends could climax from indirect cock-​ nudging alone. “What is wrong with you?” she asks. How would you react to that, Brooklyn? Probably like this: you’d get up, get dressed, tell her she’s full of shit – delusional – and inform her on your way out the door that all of her previous boyfriends were liars. You wouldn’t settle for indirect stimulation – so why should your girlfriends have to settle for indirect stimulation?

I’m going to let you off the hook just a bit: you most likely aren’t entirely responsible for your ignorance or your predicament. The women you’ve slept with up to this point may have contributed to your ignorance. A lot of women, when they first start having sex, believe they

should be able to have orgasms from intercourse alone – because that’s the way women’s orgasms seem to work in movies, porn and romance novels, and, funnily enough, it’s the way their ill-​informed young boyfriends insist women’s orgasms work. Consequently, some young women psych themselves out, convincing themselves that they’re having orgasms while their boyfriends huff and puff; other women fake orgasms for fear that their boyfriends will think they’re damaged goods if they can’t come from intercourse alone.

Since inexperienced young women tend to have sex with inexperienced young men, these psyched/faked orgasms can leave young men with a false impression of the way women’s bodies work and, sadly, of their own sexual abilities. Bad-​ in-​bed boys bop through their sex lives until the earth-​shattering moment when they find themselves in bed with a woman who insists on a little hand action or a lot of oral sex.

When a boy finds himself in bed with a woman who demands that her orgasm (and her clit) play as central a role in the sex act as his orgasm (and the head of his dick), these boys – these dear, sweet, darling breeder boys – freak the fuck out.

They think the new girlfriend is some sort of psychotic nympho, or, like you, they think their lovemaking skills have deteriorated or their cocks suddenly aren’t big enough.

But the new girlfriend isn’t a psychotic nympho. She’s just not a doormat. And the boy’s lovemaking skills haven’t de-

teriorated – they never developed in the first place. And as for your particular cock, Brooklyn, it may be too big, too small or just right, but almost all women need stimulation in addition to fucking to achieve orgasm, regardless of their manfriend’s cock size. So the size of your pee-​pee doesn’t matter all that friggin’ much, except, perhaps, aesthetically.

You fear the girlfriend “will never enjoy [intercourse] as much as I do,” Brooklyn, and that fear sometimes causes you to go soft. Fear not: she’ll enjoy the fucking just as much as you do, so long as you remember to pay attention to her clit while you’re fucking her. If your arms aren’t broken or bound, reach down or around and finger her clit while you bang away; encourage her to play with herself when you’re fucking; try different positions to see if different angles of penetration might provide more direct stimulation to her clit, and then let her control the speed and pace of the grind; get her off with your mouth or your hand before you fuck; buy some “clit grapes” at a sex-​toy store – the possibilities are endless.

Learn more about women’s bodies, listen to your partner’s verbal cues, watch for her physical ones, and make her pleasure a priority – that’s how you avoid being one of those men women complain about all the time. Good luck.

This holiday season, send the Savage Lovecast as a gift! savagelovecast.com mail@savagelove.net @fakedansavage on Twitter

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