Josephine May 2011

Josephine May 2011

St. Joseph’s women’s magazine

She’s a people person Debbie King is the queen of relationships Perfume tips

There’s a scent that’s right for you

EAT YOUR FRUIT Yes, your mother said it, and it’s good advice if you want to feel better

Planning, planning and more planning

A family vacation is not the time to cast your fate to the wind

Spring sniffles

Tackling the beginning of hay-fever season

from the

editorial: (816) 271-8594 toll-free: (800) 779-6397 advertising: (816) 271-8527 fax: (816) 271-8686 josephine@ newspressnow.com

Our staff Editor Jess DeHaven jess.dehaven@newspressnow.com Presentation editor Paul Branson paul.branson@newspressnow.com Photo editor Todd Weddle todd.weddle@newspressnow.com Writers Sylvia Anderson Tamara Clymer Shea Conner Jennifer Gordon Jennifer Hall blake Hannon Kristen Hare Lisa Horn Christina Hazelwood Heckman betsy Lee Stacey Mollus Alonzo Weston Erin Wisdom Cathy Woolridge Photography Eric Keith Jessica Stewart Wonsuk Choi

|05/11

Josephine

St. Joseph News-Press P.o. box 29 St. Joseph, Mo 64502

the regulars

editor’s note

4

events calendar

6

the 5

8

average joe

28

getting real

29

meal time

30

inside

Cover photography by Jessica Stewart/Josephine magazine

cover girl

Debbie King has found her Prince Charming.

But she’d never say relationships — even with a prince — are easy.

But they can be improved, which is what the St. Joseph woman aims to help people do through her nonprofit organization, Impacting Lives International. King leads seminars for both singles and couples dealing with relationship struggles.

And she can speak with the credibility, too, of someone who’s been in the trenches.

“My husband and I have been married 43 years,” she says. “It hasn’t always been a fairy tale, but we remained committed to each other, and he became my prince, and I became his princess. But it’s taken work.”

Read more about King and her work through Impacting Lives International on page 16.

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| Josephine magazine |

May 2011

Making scents Choose the perfume that’s right for you

10

Giving garments Donated formalwear in demand

12

Aaah-choo Hay fever symptoms are nothing to sneeze at

14

A professional people person St. Joseph woman offers seminars on improving relationships

16

Going up The price of cotton is rising, so now is the time to stock up on your wardrobe

20

Lose weight, find support You don’t have to go it alone, but you may need to ask for help

22

Go nuts for fruit Filling your shopping cart with new produce is tasty, healthy

24

Holiday road Traveling with family can be fun — if you plan

26

3

Wine Tastings

editor’s note

Every year I look forward to spring with a mixture of longing and dread. Longing because I can’t stand cold and snow. Dread because I can’t breathe.

As I write this, my nasal passages seem to be swollen shut.

Like many people, I suffer from hay fever. For me, this is a relatively recent malady. Growing up, I watched my dad and sister both suffer with runny noses and eyes and counted myself lucky not to have allergies.

But as I entered my late 20s, I too began to have issues with itching, dripping and breathing properly.

From April through October, I carry Kleenex with me everywhere and take a common over-the-counter medicine daily. If, like me, you’re one of the millions of people who suffer from allergies, turn to Tamara Clymer’s story on page 14 to find out how to get your symptoms under control.

If your hay fever won’t let you stop and smell the flowers, you might at least be able to enjoy the scent of perfume. With all the bottles out there, from the latest celebrity fragrances to the classic standbys, how do you know what perfume is right for you and for various occasions? Should you buy an eau de toilette,? A parfum? Not even sure what’s the difference?

Lisa Horn asked the experts for

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Our perfume story might inspire you to head out for a little scent shopping. While you’re out, you might consider picking up some other things. The price of cotton is on the rise, meaning clothing will cost more by the end of the year. Kim Norvell looked into what you should be buying now to save money down the road. That story is on page 20.

Maybe you’re looking to clean some things out of your wardrobe rather than add to it? If you’ve got old prom dresses, wedding attire (you know you’re not ever going to wear that bridesmaid’s dress again) or other formal you no longer need, there are plenty of places you can take them to give them new life. Check out Jennifer Gordon’s story on page 12 for more.

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area events

SUN

MON

Every Monday in May except Memorial Day 9:45 a.m. (weigh-in at 8:30), TOPS (Take off Pounds Sensibly) a non-profit, weightloss support and education group, East Hills Church of Christ, 3912 Penn.

TUE

May 3 6:30 p.m.

Pony Express Chapter of Cowboys for Christ, Pony Express Saddle and Bridle Club, north of K Highway on County Road 371.

Call 238-7503.

WED

Every Wednesday in May 7 a.m., Farmer’s market, 3821 Eastridge Village.

7:30 a.m., St. Joseph BNI weekly meeting, Pony Express Museum.

Call 262-9684.

May 17 6:30 p.m., Pony Express Chapter of ABWA meeting.

Call 232-7462.

7 to 9 p.m., St. Joseph Camera Club, Rolling Hills Consolidated Library.

May 9 5:30 p.m. Show Me Women Who Care giving circle, quarterly meeting, St. Joseph Public Library at East Hills in downstairs theater room. Call 262-2461 or e-mail showmewomenwhocare@ gmail.com for information.

If you would like to list your event or meeting in the calendar, please e-mail your information to josephine@newspressnow. com.

6

May 2011

6:30 p.m. St. Jo Women On The Go, Moila, dinner, $15. Call 279-4583 for reservations.

SAT

Every Friday in May Friday Night Wine Tastings, 5 to 8 p.m., Smooth Endings Fine Wines, Spirits and Cigars, corner of Belt and Beck, (816) 7494WINE, $5 per person.

Every Saturday in May 7 a.m. Farmer’s market, 3821 Eastridge Village.

5:30 p.m. Third Thursday Wine Tasting, AlbrechtKemper Museum of Art. Cost is $10 per person.

Call 232-9750.

10 a.m., Welcome Wagon Social Club of St. Joseph, monthly meeting, Rolling Hills Library, 1904 N. Belt Highway. Call 279-1947.

7 p.m., Introductory to Creighton Model Fertility Awareness and Appreciation, Heartland Medical Plaza. Course is designed to help couples cooperate with their fertility in family planning.

Call 232-2258.

May 12

FRI

May 19

May 24

May 2

THUR

May 4&11

6:30 p.m. Scrap & Chat, at Belt Branch, 1904 N. Belt Highway, of Rolling Hills Consolidated Library.

Club gatherings 7 p.m., Young are open to the Living Essential Oils presents free public. The library provides long natural health tables and an seminar, ChilliEllison die-cut cothe Housing machine for Authority buildscrapbook enthuing. Call (660) siasts to use.

707-0097.

| Josephine magazine |

7:30 p.m. Pony Express Saddle and Bridle Club monthly meeting, north of K Highway on County Road 371. Call (816) 669-3478.

May 26 6:30 p.m. St. Joseph Aglow Community Lighthouse, St. Joseph Library at East Hills. Call 390-8081.

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The

5 Get more energy in 10 minutes

Health. When that 3 p.m. fatigue sets in, get moving. According to a report on WebMD.com, even a 10-minute walk can help you overcome feelings of fatigue. And it works better than a candy bar. In a study published two decades ago but still often-quoted, Robert Thayer, PhD, a professor at California State University, Long Beach, compared the energizing effects on 12 different days when 18 people either ate a candy bar or walked briskly for 10 minutes. Walking increased energy for two hours. The sugar snack initially boosted energy, but after an hour, participants were more tired and had less energy.

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May 2011

tips for life

Give puffy eyes the freeze Beauty. A night of sipping champagne or eating salty foods can lead to fluid retention — and the resulting puffiness — around the eyes, but vegetables can offer a quick fix. Frozen vegetables, that is — preferably in the form of a bag of corn or peas, which contour to the face. Real Simple magazine recommends wrapping the bag in a towel and placing it over your eyes for 10 minutes. The cold of the bag stimulates circulation under the eyes, which helps bring down that fluid.

Take inventory Money. Have you ever found three open jars of peanut butter in your pantry or two bottles of mustard in your fridge? Maintaining an inventory will stop that nonsense and ultimately save you money. NourishedKitchen.com recommends taking inventory of the foods in your pantry, cupboards, fridge and freezer every month. This ensures that you always know exactly what is available to you. In addition, the inventory will help you use foods before they expire and ensure that you do not purchase more than you need.

| Josephine magazine |

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You’re his superstar What is he thinking?: Our Blake Hannon shared this final thought with our female readers before heading back home to Kentucky: Whether you are male or female, a celebrity crush is an inevitability. We always have at least one superstar of the opposite sex that we find irresistible. And women, if you are in a relationship with us, this should never be a doublestandard. If a woman says she finds an A-list actor or famous athlete attractive, she tells the man and probably expects him to be mature about it and not flip out or feel threatened. But when a guy tells you his celebrity object of occasional lust and biological urges, try not to be too jealous. Don’t over-analyze her facial features or body type and compare them to your own. We may be more primal beings than the fairer sex, but even if those unattainable objects were within our grasp, we would never leave you for them. You’ll always be No. 1. Take comfort in that.

Think before you speak Relate. If talking out problems were easy, we would get no enjoyment from reality television. Before you throw a “Real Housewives” style tantrum, try out these communication tips from Lisa Brookes Kift, a marriage and family therapist. Before you respond with the first retort that comes to mind, pause and take a breath. Listen to what the other person is saying and then reply.

Remember that phrase about assumptions? Ask questions to make sure you understand exactly what the other person means. Put yourself in the other person’s place. Empathy and reason will probably cool your personal reaction to what’s going on.

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Making scents Choose the perfume that’s right for you

By Lisa Horn • Josephine magazine

Celebrity perfumes are about as common as celebrity scandals. But what if you’d rather smell like a better version of you and not Kim Kardashian or Beyonce?

The trick, according to Megan Dobbs, sales associate in fragrance and Elizabeth Arden at Dillard’s in East Hills Shopping Center, is to try samples that appeal to you before settling on one perfume.

Because our scent changes throughout the day, so does the perfume we’re wearing. And of course, a fragrance that smells great on your best friend may smell completely different on you.

“Everyone’s body chemistry is different,” Dobbs says. “So it’s really all about being able to try first.”

When sniffing scents, Dobbs recommends trying no more than four perfumes at a time. A whiff of coffee beans or even sniffing a piece of wool can help refresh the nose while smelling, according to Style at ehow.com.

Knowing the difference between the scents you’re smelling also is helpful in choosing the right potency for your personality. From strongest to lightest scent, perfumes range in this order: parfum, eau de parfum, eau de toilette, eau de cologne and the final category of shower gels, body powders and lotions. If you prefer a scent that lasts throughout the day, Dobbs recommends a parfum or eau de parfum. These formulas are the highest concentration of perfume with very little water or alcohol added, she says. They also are better for wear in the fall and winter.

Lollia, one of several indie perfume companies now competing with department store brands, agrees with the “try it, before you buy it” idea. “... The real proof in the pudding is to let the perfume warm on the skin and blossom into the dry down where the true character of the fragrance will reveal itself,” says Margot Elena, founder of Lollia, a Colorado company. “At this point, you will really be able to identify how the composition works on your skin — top, middle and bottom notes and, most importantly, how those notes work together with each

other and your body chemistry.”

If you typically have a hard time finding a perfume to wear and if most scents overwhelm you, try a fragrance with heavy citrus notes, Elena says. Across the board, these are the most wearable, she says.

“Look for a balance that is not too sweet, and has a dry down that is fresh and clean,” Elena says.

Also, don’t feel tied to wearing the same scent all the time, she adds.

“It used to be the case that we women identified with one classic fragrance as a signature scent,” she says. “Instead, think about fragrance as an accessory to what you are doing and how you want to feel.”

Whether you’re playing sports or having a fun day out with the girls, Elena suggests something citrusy or an oceanic, aquatic-type fragrance. At the office, you may want to wear something romantic and floral but also modern and light enough to be enjoyable in the elevator. New scents like Coach Poppy and Marc Jacobs Daisy Eau So Fresh work well, Dobbs says.

If you’re feeling your femme fatale come out for a night on the town with your boyfriend or husband, Elena recommends trying a scent that’s darker and sexier, with undertones of exotic woods.

Sexy scents like patchouli, amber and musk also are great for the winter, Dobbs says. For spring and summer, citrusy scents tend to be lighter and more pleasing.

To make a scent last longer, Dobbs suggests layering your fragrance. Start with bath gel, followed by a perfumed lotion or powder. Then end with your fragrance’s eau de parfum, eau de toilette or eau de cologne.

To really surround yourself with fragrance, try a room scent. St. Joseph’s Garden Gate Flowers and Gifts carries a full line of home fragrance sprays, candles, lotions and even laundry soap.

“The two go hand in hand,” says Karen Beattie, owner of Garden Gate. “When people are shopping for a room fragrance, I also ask, ‘What kind of perfume do you wear?’”

But perhaps the most important thing to remember when scent shopping is that the nose knows, Elena says.

“Follow your nose when evaluating,” she says. “The nose knows quality and will sniff out unpleasant synthetic fillers and imbalanced compositions.”

Make it your own Want to create a signature scent that’s truly you? Scentcrafter.com allows you to blend your favorite scents for your own unique fragrance, complete with your own label. And if there’s an old perfume you’ve been searching for but just can’t find, check out scentmatchers.com, which makes perfumes based on the formulas of discontinued or hard-to-find fragrances.

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May 2011

| Josephine magazine |

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Giving garments

Donated formalwear is in demand

By Jennifer Gordon • Josephine magazine

M

These stores also accept formalwear: In St. Joseph: Goodwill, 3615 Faraon St., 232-0197 Second Season Shop, 702 Messanie St., 279-9136 Central Services Charity Thrift Shop, 3624 Mitchell Ave., 749-4177 Northwest region: Thrift Shop, 105 E. Fourth St., Maryville, Mo. (660) 562-0005 New Beginnings, 217 East Third St., Cameron, Mo. (816) 632-3337

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ore than the music and your date, the dress you wore made your formal dance a night to a remember.

The tulle, the soft overlay of fabric, the intricate beading, gave you one night of elegance little girls dream of. But like Cinderella, the magic wore off when the dance ended.

Chances are, old dance dresses now mingle with similarly banished bridesmaid gowns in either the wrong length or hue to warrant a second use. Your dream dresses, and even that olive green, floor-length ensemble your college roommate selected for her bridal party, deserve a second life.

The Disabled American Veterans thrift store at 3025 S. Belt Highway in St. Joseph, accepts the puffy sleeves and the lace patterns of yesteryear along with more recent formalwear.

Key holder Dominique DeShon says they get a range of formalwear from wedding dresses to bridesmaid gowns. Anyone can drop off donated clothing items during the store’s business hours, from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. Monday through Saturday and from 10 a.m. to 8 p.m. Sundays.

The store also accepts costume jewelry, shoes and handbags and provides tax donation receipts.

Kappy Hodges suggests women donate more contemporary dresses (preferably purchased in the previous five years) to Cinderella’s Closet, an organization that collects prom dresses for area high school students. Each spring, teens come to Cinderella’s Closet, located in the AFL-CIO

building, 1203 N. Sixth St. in St. Joseph, to pick out free donated dresses, shoes, bags and other accessories for prom. Ms. Hodges organized the two walk-in events held this year during prom season.

“We attach a lot of value to our dresses, and we don’t want to dump them where someone is not going to appreciate them. They definitely are treasured by the girls (who come in),” she says.

Before you donate, check the dresses for stains.

If possible, have them dry cleaned to make the organizers’ pre-event work a little easier. All dress sizes are appreciated, but Cinderella’s Closet could really use more plus-sized options for its visiting teens. Ms. Hodges also asks for shoe sizes 8 and up and any other accessories, as Cinderella’s Closet gives away most its stash by the end of prom season.

Any washed and wearable formalwear also can go to the Salvation Army thrift store at 810 N. 22nd St. Store manager Karen Johnson says the thrift store could always use donations from any era. She’s noticed the demand, especially for larger sizes.

“We do have people come in looking for (dresses). Maybe they can’t spend $200 for one, but they do have enough for a $20 bill,” she says.

The Salvation Army thrift store operates 9 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. Monday through Friday and 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Saturday.

Women who want to donate their wedding dresses to a charitable cause can send their taxdeductible gowns to the Making Memories Breast Cancer Foundation. The national non-profit collects gowns and sells them at regional bridal events to benefit the foundation’s wish-granting charity for breast cancer patients. For more information on how to donate, visit www.making memories.org or call (503) 491-8091.

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Aaah-choo

Hay fever symptoms are nothing to sneeze at

S

By Tamara Clymer • Josephine magazine

hari Cline was tired of sniffling ... and sneezing ... and rubbing her itchy eyes.

A few months after moving back from Mississippi and Tennessee, the St. Joseph resident found her old allergies had returned with her. She didn’t waste any time getting in to see her allergy specialist.

“I was miserable,” she says.

Dr. Helen Nguyen sees patients like Cline come in all the time, often with their eyes swollen shut, miserable from the allergens nature shoots out this time of year. The board-certified immunologist says there are two times of the year that are particularly miserable for allergy sufferers: In the fall when ragweed pollen goes crazy in August and September and this time of year, May and June, when grass pollen gets going.

But any time of the year is the right time for allergens. And just because you don’t suffer right now doesn’t mean you’re out of the woods. Nguyen says you can develop allergies at any point in your life because you have to be exposed to something several times before the allergy will show up.

“So if someone with allergies moves to another area they may not have symptoms the first two or three years they live there,” she says.

But if they are predisposed to that allergy it will eventually develop.

SYMPTOMS, TREATMENT OPTIONS Nguyen says you can tell it’s an allergy if it tends to come back year after year at about the same time and sticks around for a few weeks.

The symptoms include something as benign as red, itchy eyes, sneezing, a

runny nose and drainage in the back of the throat to something more serious as in an asthma attack.

The best way to keep from suffering is to avoid the allergens in the first place, but Nguyen realizes that’s pretty unrealistic. Still, she says if your hay fever is particularly bad, you should minimize your exposure by not going outside while the pollen count is high, particularly early in the morning between 5 and 10 a.m., when the pollens are released.

On windy days she suggests you stay inside and keep your windows closed. And no matter what is going on outside, she recommends patients wash their hair every evening during hay fever season.

“When you go out, you get pollen on your hair,” she says. “You should wash your hair so you don’t go to bed with it.”

OVER THE COUNTER Nguyen says medication has come a long way since the days of sleepinducing antihistamines. The second generation of antihistamines not only doesn’t make people drowsy, they’re longer acting and there are more of them. Three of them are available over the counter — Claritin, Zyrtec and more recently Allegra. Nose sprays like Nasacrom also are available as well as eye drops like Opticrom.

The old stand-bys still have their place as well. Nguyen says the advantage of Benadryl is it is fast acting. It will start working within a half hour of when it is taken, which

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is great for severe reactions. The problem is it can make you sleepy and only lasts four to six hours, as opposed to the 24-hour relief the newer drugs offer.

PRESCRIPTION OPTIONS If those options aren’t working for patients, Nguyen still has some drugs in her allergy-fighting arsenal. She says there are a few more antihistamines available only by prescription as well as steroidal nasal sprays, more potent eye drops and inhalers for asthma sufferers.

And for the truly tough cases, there’s always allergy immunotherapy, or allergy shots. They are more of a long-term treatment that she says goes to the root of the problem.

Given over three to four years, the shots help block the allergic reaction before it even takes place.

“For most people after three or four years of shots they will do well for several years and then their symptoms will come back,” she says.

“For a small percentage they never need any more shots. And then another small percentage once you stop the shots they have problems.

So we cannot tell you. There are no guarantees that this is a permanent fix, but they do help a lot.”

Cline is getting those shots. Almost a year after first walking into Nguyen’s office, she continues to go back every week for two shots that help her immune system block her body’s natural reactions to allergens like dust mites. While she says getting the shots every week is a little inconvenient, she’d much rather put up with that than have to pop pills every day.

“After I was on them for about six months, I noticed I didn’t have to rely on a lot of those nasal sprays on a daily basis,” she says. “You’re building this immunity up so you’re not relying on all the pharmaceuticals and you’re not packing the tissues around all the time either.”

It’s just what Nguyen hopes will happen. And for her patients who might just be a bit squeamish, she says there really is nothing to worry about.

“My shots are not big shots,” she says.

Cline agrees.

“It’s quick and it’s a small needle,” she laughs. “They’re not drawing blood.”

| Josephine magazine |

May 2011

15

A professional

people person

St. Joseph woman offers se on improving relatio

By Erin Wisdom • Josephine magazine

D

ebbie King has a special knack for letting people know when they’re just being dumb.

She can do it tactfully, of course.

And with genuine care. But perhaps most importantly, she can say what people need to hear without turning them away.

“I feel like God’s given me favor to tell people ‘You’re messing up. How’s that working for you?’” says the St. Joseph woman, who has plenty of relationship experience herself thanks to 43 years of marriage and decades of working with people. “ ... Most of the people I’ve encountered, across the board, just don’t think.

They don’t think about the ‘what ifs,’ and then the ‘what ifs’ bite them in the rear end.”

All you have to do for real-life examples of this, she adds, is watch “Judge Judy.” As for King herself, she’s found a platform for helping people not through a televised courtroom but through Impacting Lives International, a nonprofit organization she began in 2007 that provides relationship education.

Please see Page 18

n

eminars onships

Jessica stewart/Josephine Magazine

CONTINUED FROM Page 16

For people who have known her throughout the years, this move didn’t come as a surprise.

“She really cares about people and wants them to be free and to find a way out of bad situations,” says Janna Wuest, who knows King through the Christian women’s organization Aglow International. “She doesn’t want people to stay where they’re at.”

King received training to become licensed as a relationship educator after years of more or less serving in that role in a variety of jobs, most recently as the coordinator of a teen community awareness program through Catholic Charities and, before that, as the social service coordinator for Head Start in St. Joseph. She also has on her resume a stint as a scrub nurse in labor and delivery and a job working with teenagers through the Kauffman Foundation in Kansas City.

Through all of these professions and years of experience, the 62-year-old has seen common threads of relationship dysfunction — both professional and personal — that she now seeks to address through seminars she leads. Some are geared toward the workplace, while others counsel singles or couples about romantic relationships, but universal to all of her classes is a focus on communication skills, understanding personality differences and identifying hidden issues in relationships.

Recent seminars King has offered have been through the St. Joseph Youth Alliance. One set of four-week classes catered to single parents, while another catered to couples — and both aimed to increase harmony in the parents’ lives in order to benefit their children, says Fran Brothers, community networker for the Youth Alliance.

“When the parents have a better relationship, it trickles down to the children, and the children are safer,” Brothers adds, also noting of King, “Debbie can be very forthright 18

May 2011

| Josephine magazine |

and direct and not offend. She just has a way about her that doesn’t turn off the parent; they’re still there, still listening, still learning.”

This is important in settings where individuals and couples King works with commonly are connected through their children to partners — or former partners — they don’t get along with and, on top of this, are dealing with the challenges of living on low incomes.

King notes that she often saw this scenario when she worked at Head Start.

“I’d see a lot of turmoil in homes, because people didn’t know how to relate to each other effectively,” she says, adding of Impacting Lives International, “It has provided me with another avenue to talk to people about making better decisions for themselves and their kids.”

King’s classes are open to anyone at a cost of $25 for couples (plus $22 for two workbooks) and $15 for singles (plus $11 for a workbook).

Workplace seminars also are available. For more information or to register, contact King at 689-3274 or gtl@sbcgolbal.net.

King is seeing the demand for her seminars grow, following a presentation she made last month at the national Head Start conference in Kansas City and an acceptance of her classes by the Missouri Department of Health and Senior Services as acceptable coursework for workers who are required to log a certain number of classroom hours to maintain certifications. She’s not sorry at all for the extra work this has created for her — despite the fact most people her age are thinking of slowing down rather than picking up speed.

“My interests have always been in helping people. If I had to work in a factory, I would shrivel up and die,” she laughs. “ ... I couldn’t ask for a better set-up; I’m right at the point of things really taking off.”

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Wonsuk Choi/Josephine Magazine

Going up The price of cotton is rising, so now is the time to stock up on your wardrobe

By KIM NORVELL • Josephine magazine

W

ith cotton at an all-time high, consumers can expect clothing prices to increase in the second half of the year. However, clothing stores in St. Joseph say that although there is talk of higher prices, their consumers haven’t felt the backlash and their corporations are doing all they can to avoid it. ¶ “We’ve had some rumblings from the higher ups, but nothing has really hit the stores yet,” says Jed Kent, executive team leader of logistics for St. Joseph’s Target. ¶ In preparation for those prices to be passed on to consumers, some may wonder what items should be bought now to avoid feeling a pinch in the bank account later.

While it’s hard to predict the future, experts say items that are 100-percent cotton will be the heaviest hit. According to The Associated Press, the price of cotton has more than doubled in the last year, while the price of synthetic fabrics has risen nearly 50 percent.

“Cotton is not really as big a fabric as it used to be. Fifteen years ago doing this job that would have been ‘oh my gosh,’ but there’s a lot of different fabrics out there that they use,” says Sandee Kraft, store manager at St. Joseph’s Dillard’s.

That being said, cotton is still considered the fabric of our lives, and chances are it’s the fabric your family prefers, so stocking up now on those basic necessities will save you money in the long run.

Consider the socks, underwear and Tshirts you have in your drawers. Chances are they’re the same brand and style. It’s what fits you and your taste.

Kraft suggests stocking up on those necessity items, especially when they go on sale, to avoid having to buy them if prices rise. Every so often, Dillard’s has a buy-one-get-one sale that consumers like to take advantage of (and stock up on) for the best prices.

“If you shop for those sales you’re going to save money, and you might as well stock up because you’re going to wear the same sock,” Kraft says. “You should buy them in bulk when they’re on sale and then keep them instead of waiting until May 2011

they get holes in them to buy more.”

Another item that is heavily influenced by cotton prices is jeans. The Associated Press reports jeans will be hit hard, in price and style, when higher costs are passed on to the consumer. Clothing makers will more than likely choose to blend synthetic fabrics as well as design jeans with fewer beads and embellishments.

With that in mind, now is a good time to buy jeans, as most stores are making room for shorts, dresses and skirts.

And while it’s not the most obvious effect, color choices will be limited with increased prices. If you’re a person who loves color, take advantage of the spring and summer lines that are in the stores now and stock up on your brightly colored clothing.

Other shopping tips for saving money in the long-run: Consider buying resale. Shelly Lemke, co-owner of Lil’ Pink Closet, a resale store that opened in St. Joseph in April, says resale and consignment shops have become more and more popular as clothing prices have increased and clothing allowances have decreased.

“We have had a lot of positive feedback on the resale store because people are just wanting to get more for their dollar,” she says. “They’re actually shopping and they’re selling their gently used merchandise for money to use in the store

| Josephine magazine |

— so they’re actually gaining.”

Shop coupons and sales. This is always good advice for saving money. Most stores will supply coupons to get consumers in their stores. If you follow sales closely, consumers can buy in-season clothing for cheap, Kraft says. Lemke says “smart shoppers” are the ones that take advantage of coupons and sales.

Buy out of season. This tip is generally the best advice to follow. While you’re taking the risk of buying clothing that won’t be fashion-forward the next year, you can take advantage of stocking up on essentials and classic pieces. With jeans prices expected to rise, buy a few pairs now while they’re on sale and out of season in order to save money later.

Make clothing an investment. Lemke says most women who are fashion-minded don’t let clothing prices affect their purchasing decisions. “Fashion is like saying you’re not going to get your hair done — that’s something that people will just splurge on,” she says.

Those who do make clothing an investment will purchase higher-priced items they know they will wear time and time again. Purchasing a high-cost item will save you money in the long run if you wear it more times than you wear a lower-cost item. Consider investing in wardrobe staples, such as blazers, slacks and handbags that won’t go out of style.

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21

Lose weight, find support You don’t have to go it alone, but you may need to ask for help

H

“

22

By Kristen Hare • Josephine magazine

ey everyone,” a young woman wrote on a discussion board for ExtraPounds. com, an online weight loss support group. “I’m new to the site ... I am in need of a support buddy. Someone who can help me through the tough times. Someone that will encourage me even when I ‘fall off the wagon,’ a person who can help me make the right decisions when it comes to food and exercise.”

And she’s not alone.

May 2011

| Josephine magazine |

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According to the site, there are more than 55,000 members.

Whether you’re searching online, signing up for an office weight-loss challenge or are part of a weight-loss program like Weight Watchers, having that support may be as crucial as choosing the right foods and getting active.

At Weight Watchers, members who attend meetings lose three times more weight than those who don’t, says Sonia Misemer, a Weight Watchers meeting leader in St. Joseph.

“Weight Watchers has been around for 45-plus years, and support is the pillar of the program,” she says.

With the hurried pace of our lives these days, it can be tough to stick to something like eating healthy and getting in shape.

“You need to feel like you’re not alone,” Misemer says.

With both weight loss and exercise, having people around also can provide encouragement for getting through the tough times, like plateaus or bad weeks, says Brian Cross, senior program director at the YMCA. And even if you’re truly not alone, family, friends and co-workers can sometimes sabotage weight loss, intentionally or not. The intentional ones may be doing so out of jealousy, Misemer says, and the unintentional ones may just not know what you need.

“I think most of us have people that truly want us to succeed,” she says.

“They just don’t always understand what support you need.”

LOOK FOR IT If the people around you aren’t committed to weight loss, find people who are.

Weight Watchers offers meetings and a website with message boards and ways to find support. There are also many other programs that do the same.

Online, it’s easy to find people with commonalities beyond the desire to lose

MAKE YOURSELF ACCOUNTABLE

weight. And those are important to find, Misemer says.

Maybe you’re looking for people who need to lose 100 or more pounds, are trying to lose baby weight or have that last 10 to go.

When people are facing similar circumstances, they can better appreciate the highs and lows you may be experiencing, and they can offer tips and advice about how they’re succeeding.

“Support also comes in the way of ‘I need ideas, I’m in a rut,’” she says.

ASK FOR IT If you’re not getting the support you need while trying to lose weight, maybe that’s because you’re not asking for it from the people who are in your life. Or maybe you don’t know what you need.

Misemer loves to tell the story of a member and teacher who asked her students to ask her anytime she ate something if she’d written it down.

Most people don’t want judges or food police, she says, but cheerleaders.

“The thing she did right was she said, ‘This is what I need you to do.’”

Often, people will assume the people in their lives just know what they need, and they’re upset when they don’t. So be clear about ways family and friends can help you — maybe it’s hiding the fatty snacks, or realizing that some restaurants are easier to make healthy choices at than others.

“We need to do our part and be articulate, clear and passionate about ‘This is what you can really do to help me.’”

Krystal Staggs, outpatient dietitian with Heartland Health, agrees.

Suggest going to places that you know offer you healthy options, she says, try adding in some physical activity, like a walk, before an outing with friends, or suggest doing something that has nothing to do with food at all.

It takes a strong, independent person to go it alone, Cross says.

Regardless of whether you have people around you cheering you on or offering you another Krispy Kreme, he recommends setting big and small goals and keeping those goals visible.

If you want to lose 20 pounds, he says, focus on smaller steps, too, like losing two, or five.

It also helps to take a little time each day to think about and focus on your goal, says Staggs.

Maybe you do that by keeping a pair of jeans you hope to fit into hanging where you can see them, or maybe it’s a note to yourself on the fridge.

“Anything that helps to remind you of your goal,” she says.

KEEP IT FRESH If you’re the meal maker in your family, you don’t have to spear a grapefruit while everyone else savors their steak.

Find meals you can make for your family, Cross says, and slightly modify for yourself.

And don’t just eat the same foods or stick to the same workout, he adds.

“Change it up.”

Staggs agrees, adding that it’s important not just for you to eat healthy, but your whole family.

Maybe it’s your spouse or family, maybe co-workers or friends or maybe people you’ve met online who understand your challenges with weight loss like others can’t. But whoever they are, you don’t have to tackle the issue by yourself.

“If you’re doing it alone,” Misemer says, “you feel like you’re all alone and nobody else knows what you’re going through.”

They do, however. You just have to find them.

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May 2011

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Go nuts for fruits Filling your shopping cart with new produce is tasty, healthy

F

By Betsy Lee • Josephine magazine

or the uninitiated, the produce department at the grocery store can feel like uncharted waters. Everywhere you look there are fruits with strange names, textures and smells.

But for the more adventurous, a trip to the grocery store can turn into an experiment in healthy eating.

According to Sheri Caldwell, HyVee dietician, fruits offer tremendous health benefits. This is especially true if you’re able to consume a variety.

“All the different colors of plant foods provide unique nutrients and health benefits that help our body fight disease and the aging process and help promote health and longevity,” she says.

There are hundreds of ways to use fruit, but both Caldwell and Ed Hepburn, produce manager at Ray’s Green Hills Super Market, suggest beginning with fresh fruits.

“As you look around the produce department, notice the wide variety of colors and the assortment of options,” Caldwell says. “Have fun filling your cart with a rainbow of colors to eat.”

For example, Hepburn says mangos are one of the most popular fruits worldwide.

“But we don’t sell very many of them,” he says. “I think people don’t know how to eat them, but you just

slice off a piece and munch.”

When you look around, start by picking up one new fruit each trip. If you are a parent, let your kids pick something new every time. By doing this, you’re introducing them and yourself to new, healthy foods.

“They may also be more interested in trying something they helped select and prepare,” Caldwell says. “If you see something in our produce department that you want to try before you buy, ask one of the produce staff members for a sample of it.”

As much as you can, stick to fresh fruits.

“Fresh fruits are usually more filling because they take longer to chew and digest,” Caldwell says. “This is a great tip for weight control. Fresh fruits usually have more fiber and retain more of their vitamins and minerals than canned fruits because they have been through less processing.”

But if you need to, because of your budget or preferences, shopping for fruits in the canned or frozen food aisles can still be beneficial.

“They tend to have a more consistent price throughout the year,” Caldwell says. “They are also harvested at their peak freshness and nutrition quality so (they) can be a great choice.”

Dried fruit, though it can contain a lot of sugar, also can add to your diet.

Experts recommend that half of your plate at every meal be filled with fruits and vegetables. If this is tough for you, Caldwell urges consumers to find different ways to use fruits in favorite dishes. Examples include sprinkling fresh berries on your cereal or oatmeal, making a trail mix with dried fruit to eat as a snack or making a fruit salsa for tortilla chips.

Other ideas include cooking with fruit. Caldwell says a nice berry topping can work well on a dinner of lean white meat, such as pork or chicken.

Fruit glazes also work well with fish.

“There is also a popular culinary trend to prepare fresh fruits on the grill,” Caldwell says.

Smoothies and desserts are another great way to get more fruit in your diet.

By tossing fruits you wouldn’t typically eat, such as mangos or jicama, into a smoothie, you could hide the flavor but still get the nutritional benefits.

When choosing something new or looking for a way to eat fruits that you don’t typically enjoy, Caldwell says consumers should always feel comfortable asking grocery store employees. If the first employee you ask doesn’t know the answer, ask that they chat with the produce manager and get back to you. It’s worth it for your health.

“We have a lot of data from research that shows that people who eat a diet that includes more plant-based foods such as fruit, tend to have less obesity, heart disease, diabetes, cancer and also tend to live longer when combined with an overall healthy lifestyle,” Caldwell says.

Holiday road Traveling with family can be fun — if you plan you are on board. If babies continue to suck, their ears won’t hurt so bad.

By Sylvia anderSon Josephine magazine

Vacations can bond the family together, reduce stress and create memories for a lifetime. Yet, even with good intentions, a trip with the whole family can easily turn into something reminiscent of “National Lampoon’s Vacation,” if you don’t do it right. So we asked Lisa Deal with Deal Travel in Savannah, Mo., to give us some tips. Not only does she know what works from her business, she also has plenty of experience going on vacations with her own children.

What is the most common mistake families make when planning a vacation?

Not being prepared. The hardest part is just getting from point A to point B. You should take a copy of your children’s birth certificates to prove their age for a lower fare or for proof that’s your child. I remember hearing from another travel agent about someone losing their child in Disney World. Coincidentally, another person had lost a child at the same time. If the child belongs to someone else, get a notarized letter from both parents that says they gave permission to travel with you. Or when you leave the country, you have to have a passport. With my clients, I always suggest leaving a copy of their passport at the agency. So if they lose it or it has been stolen, they can go to the local consulate and I can fax it to them. In the end, it would all work out, but why not have those things with you to speed up the process?

What advice do you have on flying with the family?

When traveling with kids, take some snacks. Prepare for the worst — for those long layovers that hopefully won’t happen.

You can’t take much for drinks, because you can’t take more than 3 ounces of liquid on board. The rule is that anything liquid or liquid based, such as makeup, toothpaste a bottle of water or juice pack, can be in 3-ounce containers or less, all of which have to go in one quart-size see-though zip lock bag. But after you go through the gate, whatever they are selling there, you can buy and take on, which can be regular-size bottles. Of course they are selling Wolfgang Puck water for $8 a bottle.

What about flying with babies?

When flying, once a child has turned 2, even if they are just a week past 2, they have to buy an adult seat. It’s also good to have a bottle that you can have them put milk or water in when

26

May 2011

According to a Ypartnership study on the anatomy of children’s vacation memories, 83 percent of children want to go to Walt Disney World Resort. What age is best for taking children there?

Some do take children younger than 6; I know in their mind they think it’s going to be fabulous. But it’s a for the moment kind of thing, because the children won’t retain most of that.

That’s why I get them to wait just a little bit — 6, 7 and 8 is a great age to do that. Once they get to about 16, they really could care less to be on a trip with the parents. So you’ve got just a small window for the magic to happen.

What is the best way to vacation at Disney World? Is it less expensive to stay off site?

I have done it every which way and done it with my kids at different ages. I’ve stayed on and off. If you stay on site you truly do get that Disney total experience. Granted, just like on the Disney cruise, you will be singing “It’s a Small World” for months. The All Star resorts aren’t really much more than staying off site. Off site, you have to spend 30 bucks each on an airport shuttle. One cab from Orlando airport to Disney is $50 one way. These are the hidden costs you have to think about.

And I don’t like being on a dead run all day, so I would get a Park Hopper instead of day tickets so that allows you to come and go for unlimited amounts of time. That way you could go to Magic Kingdom in the morning, swim a little at the hotel or rest and go to Epcot at night.

Is there somewhere besides Disney World that’s fun for families and is a good deal right now? Maybe a Disney cruise?

Because of the demand of Disney cruises, most everything for more than three people is wiped out for this year. We are looking at 2012 for families now. A really good value, probably more than anywhere else, is the Cancun/Mayan area. The resorts are all inclusive on a gorgeous beach. Most have kids’ clubs.

Is it safe?

I get asked that every day and I book that area every day. The distance from where that is and where the border areas with the trouble is, is like the distance from New York City to Miami. I’ve been there many times and I would go there today. I can’t tell you that you would be safe in Omaha, so I’m not going to say Cancun either. But personally, I would go in a heartbeat.

| Josephine magazine |

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average joe

A

Zero-sum game Men unsure of their role in a woman’s world

Alonzo Weston is a columnist and

reporter for the St. Joseph News-Press. The St. Joseph native has served on the News-Press staff for more than 20 years. He and his wife, Deanna, have two children and a dog. The St. Joseph native is also a sports junkie who doesn’t pick up after himself. If you’d like to suggest an idea for this column, contact Alonzo at alonzo.weston@ newspressnow.com.

28

May 2011

woman recently wrote a book on manning up. In “Manning Up: How the Rise of Women has Turned Men Into Boys,” author Kay S. Hymowitz laments the shortage of good men. I haven’t read the book but have seen a number of reviews and articles about it.

What I gather from these sources is that Hymowitz is basically saying that young men today refuse to grow up. They’re stuck in adolescent mode well into their 30s. They’d rather play video games and hang out with their buddies than get married and have children.

In an excerpt from the book published in a recent Wall Street Journal article Hymowitz writes, “Single men have never been civilization’s most responsible actors; they continue to be more troubled and less successful than men who deliberately choose to become husbands and fathers.”

Real men get married and raise families, Hymowitz says. And this leaves “legions of frustrated young women” whose dating choices are limited to frat boys and slackers.

Travis Grandt, a DePaul University junior quoted in a story by Debra Lipson in a recent issue of the Depaulia, says most of what Hymowitz says is factual. Many people, not just males, put off adulthood to better establish their careers.

“It’s neither women nor men who are responsible for this, but society as a whole,” Grandt says in the article. “I can’t deny I know more women who are ready to jump into adulthood than guys, but when you think about little kids, it’s the girls who are playing house and trying to imitate adults and boys who are running around playing in the dirt.”

Hymowitz attributes much of this phenomenon of Peter Pan males to

| Josephine magazine |

the success of women in the past few decades. She throws around statistical evidence that shows how women have surpassed men in higher education enrollment and in many leadership positions. She goes on to say that boys even fall behind girls in elementary and high school.

Hymowitz says this results in an uncertainty about identity among young males. They are not sure of their roles.

I have trouble with a woman telling men how to man up. That’s no different than a woman getting her feathers ruffled if a man told her to “woman up.” Whatever advice he would give would probably be insulting, Many women today see the role of traditional women as demeaning.

They would not defer to the man as head of the household or have dinner on the table when he comes home from work like those women did in 1950s black-and-white TV sitcoms like “Father Knows Best” and “Leave it to Beaver.”

They would interpret “womaning up” to mean we wanted them to stay barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen.

But women’s quest for gender equality has turned into a zero-sum game in some cases. For women to win, men have to lose.

Now, the father in family sitcoms is usually the dumbest person in the house. Not only the mom but even the kids upstage him.

And many women who say they want a good, sensitive man would run him over to get to the most dangerous looking guy in the room. He’s exciting and sexy until he sells their car for crack.

The traditional man changed because women wanted him to change.

Now they want him to change back.

We can’t win.

newspressnow.com/josephine

I

am “gardener-ish.” Maybe I should clarify. I really enjoy the excitement of putting a seed or plant in the dirt and waiting patiently for it to grow. This qualifies me as a gardener.

The “ish” part is added because 75 percent of everything I put in the ground dies soon after placement. Although I have “buried” more dead things than a funeral director, I refuse to let a brown, crunchy plant discourage me from trying again.

I think one of the reasons I keep trying is I love the organic nature of gardening and how it connects me to the pioneer women who have gone before me. I can totally relate to those amazing ladies who tilled the ground, sweat running off of the bridges of their noses as they planted vegetables to keep their families from starving to death. (Well, except for my dishwasher, air conditioning, the manicure I get after gardening and the drive-thru window where I buy our dinner so my family won’t starve to death.)

Despite modern conveniences, gardening is still a chore. I dug a vegetable garden a few years back in a location where an old railroad track used to run. The weight of the great machines had pounded the soil into cement and there were rocks and debris everywhere. Determined to be a “pioneer woman,” I began the grueling task of tilling and sifting and pulling out pieces of metal, hoping to give the plants a fighting chance.

After weeks of toiling, I planted some hearty little veggies among the rocks and prayed for their safety.

I would go to the garden on weeding days and sit among the tenacious plants, smooshing and beating the dirt clods together, crushing them into smaller versions, trying to make the soil soft so the plants could stretch out their roots.

One cool evening, as I was trying to beat my garden into submission, I reached under one of the plants and grabbed a giant clump to break apart.

Immediately, I noticed there was something different about this rock. It did not have the same solidity as the previous ones, and it felt somewhat squishy and clammy. I investigated a bit closer and noticed ... IT HAD ARMS AND LEGS! It was a toad. A super-sized one at that. He was the size of a softball and weighed a lot more than he appeared. I abruptly laid him back on the ground and without hesitation began running toward the house. (Yes, I ran, even though I knew in my head he was not coming after me. And even if he did, due to his morbid obesity he would never catch me.)

Once I entered the house, I began scrubbing my hands and nails with soap and water to remove the toad’s DNA from my skin, but no amount of washing could remove the memory of his chubby, gelatinous body in my hand. I just kept feeling his cool, hairless skin in my palm as his gooey body breathed in and out.

I never fully recovered from the shock of my encounter with the toad.

The rest of that growing season, I didn’t step into the garden without gloves to prevent myself from accidentally touching his doughy body, and I put on cowboy boots to keep him from hopping onto my foot.

The next spring when I went out to plant, whenever I got close to the garden I got a nasty case of the heebie-jeebies. I soon decided I had no choice but to surrender my garden to the swollen croaker, but I refused to give up my dream of fresh vegetables. I went back to the drawing board and drew a plan for a toad-free garden with raised sides. I knew, unless he has lost a ton of weight from eating only vegetables, that overweight toad would never be able to scale the walls to eat from my garden again!

newspressnow.com/josephine

| Josephine magazine |

getting real

An attempt to go green The colorful thing about this garden was quite the surprise Stacey molluS is a humor columnist

who believes laughter is the best form of exercise and happy people are the best looking people. She loves her family, chocolate, clothes that are stretchy and things that sparkle. You can contact her at queenofchocolates@live.com or follow her on Facebook at “Queen of Chocolates.”

May 2011

29

meal time

A Mediterranean meal

taverna shrimp with feta cheese 1 teaspoon olive oil 1/2 medium onion, sliced (1 cup) 1 teaspoon minced garlic 1 large tomato, sliced (1½ cups) 3/4 pound large shrimp, shelled 1/4 cup crumbled feta cheese 1 tablespoon fresh oregano or 1 teaspoon dried Salt and freshly ground black pepper Heat olive oil in a nonstick skillet over medium-high heat and add the onion, garlic and tomato.

Simmer five minutes. Add shrimp and sprinkle cheese and oregano on top. Simmer three minutes, turning shrimp to make sure they are cooked on both sides. Remove from heat, cover with a lid and let sit two minutes or until cheese melts. Add salt and pepper to taste. Makes two servings.

Nutrition information per serving: 302 calories (29 percent from fat), 9.6 g fat (3.9 g saturated, 3.0 g monounsaturated), 275 mg cholesterol, 39.2 g protein, 14.3 g carbohydrates, 3.0 g fiber, 472 mg sodium.

McClatchy-Tribune

Helpful hints • Buy preshelled shrimp if possible.

• If your dried oregano is gray instead of green, it’s time for a new jar.

• To save time, buy feta cheese crumbled instead of in a block.

30

Oregano, cheese add zip to shrimp

By Linda Gassenheimer • mcClatchy-Tribune

Plump fresh shrimp, big red tomatoes, fresh oregano, feta cheese and Greek olive oil were among the delights I found in a taverna off the main square on the Greek island of Corfu. Cooked together they make a specialty that is served throughout the Greek islands where all of these ingredients are plentiful.

Feta cheese is traditionally made with sheep’s or goat’s milk. Many commercial producers now make it with cow’s milk. It has a tangy flavor that lends zip to the dish. It is sold in the dairy case of most supermarkets.

Pilaf is a rice dish in which the rice is browned in oil or butter before the liquid is added.

May 2011

| Josephine magazine |

rice pilaf 1 teaspoon olive oil 1/2 cup sliced onions 1/2 cup long grain white rice 1 cup fat free, low salt chicken broth Salt and freshly ground black pepper Heat oil in a nonstick skillet over medium high and add onion and rice. Saute two minutes. Add chicken broth and bring to a simmer. Lower heat to medium, cover with a lid and cook, gently, 15 minutes. Rice will be cooked and liquid evaporated. Add salt and pepper to taste. Makes two servings.

Nutrition information per serving: 208 calories (11 percent from fat), 2.6 g fat (0.4 g saturated, 1.8 g monounsaturated), no cholesterol, 5.1 g protein, 40.2 g carbohydrates, 1.1 g fiber, 289 mg sodium.

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