Mar. 2023 - Alaska Leaf

Page 1

THE FLOWER ISSUE

#83 | MAR. 2023 THE ENLIGHTENED VOICE FREE / LEAFMAGAZINES.COM INDEPENDENT CANNABIS JOURNALISM SINCE 2010

THE 2022 ALASKA LEAF BOWL WAS LIT...

SO WHO’S READY FOR ROUND 3?

AWARDS CEREMONY & FREE EXPO AT THE EGAN CENTER COMING THIS SUMMER!

INTAKE POWERED BY

ACCEPTING ENTRIES

APRIL 1 - MAY 15, 2023 AT GREEN JAR - WASILLA

GENERAL ENTRY REQUIREMENTS

14 grams of flower, 7 grams of oil, 7 units of pre-rolls/carts/edibles/ topicals

$420 per entry, with $20 from each entry going to supporting a nonprofit TBA. All fees to be paid in full at time of dropoff.

Accepting entries starting April 1, 2023. Deadline for entry is May 15th, 2023.

2023 ALASKA LEAF BOWL CATEGORIES

Enter based on the category that best represents your flower’s flavor/ terpene profile ... or put it in the Open Category for the ultimate head-to-head competition for a Leaf Bowl award!

FLOWER

FLAVOR PROFILES:

• FUEL, OGS & CHEM

• EXOTIC FRUIT

• CITRUS & SAPS

• PURPS & DESSERTS

• OPEN CATEGORY COMPETITION

• CBD-RICH (1:1 OR BETTER - NO HEMP)

PRE-ROLLS

INFUSED/ENHANCED

TRADITIONAL

CONCENTRATES & EXTRACTS

FECO/RSO:

• HIGH THC

• HIGH ALTERNATIVE CANNABINOIDS

HYDROCARBON:

• PULL ‘N’ SNAP & SHATTER

• DIAMONDS & SAUCE

• BUDDERS & BADDERS

• CRUMBLES & SUGAR

SOLVENTLESS:

• FULL-MELT

• ROSIN

• TRADITIONAL HASH/BUBBLE HASH

CO2

CARTRIDGES:

• CO2

• DISTILLATE

• ALTERNATIVE CANNABINOID (CBD, CBG, CBN, ETC.)

• LIVE RESIN

• GENERAL HYDROCARBON

• SOLVENTLESS

INFUSED PRODUCTS

EDIBLES:

• BAKED GOODS

• CANDY

• DRINKABLES

• TINCTURES/CAPSULES/TABLETS

• GUMMIES

• OTHER TREATS

• ALTERNATIVE CANNABINOID TOPICALS:

• CREAMS/LOTIONS

• SPRAYS

• BEAUTY/SKINCARE

• TRANSDERMALS

EXPO BOOTHS & LIMITED SPONSORSHIPS AVAILABLE!

FOR MORE INFO CONTACT LEAFBOWLS@LEAFMAGAZINES.COM
(Sponsorships available only to non-competing companies)
MAR. 2023 issue #83 [ 6 THE FLOWER ISSUE 09 EDITOR’S NOTE 10 NATIONAL NEWS 12 EDIBLE OF THE MONTH 14 CONCENTRATE OF THE MONTH 16 COOKING WITH CANNABIS 20 STRAIN OF THE MONTH 24 GANJA GLOSSARY 26 TOP OF THE POTS 28 HEAT SEEKERS 30 AN ODE TO ORGANIC 34 CANNABIS COPULATION 38 STONEY BALONEY ERIK CHRISTIANSEN @ERIK.NUGSHOTS FEATURE p. 24 | Leaf Nation's Nate Williams breaks down some of the Cannabis industry's need-to-know terminology. GANJA GLOSSARY DANIEL BERMAN 12 EDIBLE OF THE MONTH BIRCH CHAGA MUSHROOM TINCTURES ERIK CHRISTIANSEN @ERIK.NUGSHOTS ADOBE STOCK 26 TOP OF THE POTS THE MOST-POPULAR STRAINS IN SEVEN STATES. 34 CANNA SUTRA HUMBOLDT SEED CO.'S CANNABIS COPULATION HUMBOLDT SEED COMPANY PHENO 109 DANIEL BERMAN WILSON! ZERO ROSIN 14 CONCENTRATE OF THE MONTH BRUCE WOLF SNACK ATTACK 16 COOKING WITH CANNABIS COURTESY AN ODE TO ORGANIC 30 SPECIAL ISSUE FEATURE

WES ABNEY CEO & FOUNDER wes@leafmagazines.com

MIKE RICKER OPERATING PARTNER + AD SALES ricker@leafmagazines.com

TOM BOWERS CHIEF OPERATING OFFICER tom@leafmagazines.com

DANIEL BERMAN CREATIVE DIRECTOR daniel@leafmagazines.com

MEGHAN RIDLEY COPY EDITOR meghan@leafmagazines.com

ABOUT THE COVER

Phenotype #109 from Humboldt Seed Company’s 10k Plant Phenotype Mega Hunt happened to be particularly photogenic and fortunately for us world class Cannabis photographer Erik “Nugshots” Christiansen was onsite to capture the magic. The cross is Pineapple Upside Down Cake x Squirt. Thefluorescentpinkhairs(stigma)weren’tas strikingwhendriedso#109didn’tmakethe winnerscircle,butstillthisphotohighlights the striking beauty of the Cannabis flower. For all you science nerds out there, check out those stigmatic papillae! Be sure to visit our website, LeafMagazines.com, to see the other covers we released this month with Erik's beautiful close-up work.

COVER & INTERIOR PHOTOS

ERIK CHRISTIANSEN @ERIK.NUGSHOTS

CONTRIBUTORS

OSCAR AVELLANEDA-CRUZ, PHOTOS

DANIEL BERMAN, PHOTOS

BOBBY BLACK, DESIGN + FEATURES

JOSHUA BOULET, ILLUSTRATION

TOM BOWERS, FEATURES

ERIK CHRISTIANSEN, PHOTOS

AMANDA DAY, FEATURES

EARLY, PRODUCTION

STEVE ELLIOTT, NATIONAL NEWS

MATT JACKSON, FEATURES

MIKE RICKER, FEATURES

MEGHAN RIDLEY, EDITING

WES ABNEY

Editor’s Note

Thanks for picking up The Flower Issue of the Leaf!

Flower power might be a hippie concept, but it really hits the spot with a tasty toke of delicious Cannabis. How lucky are we as humans that our favorite plant has evolved to not only get us high, but feel better?

When you look at the natural world of plants and animals, most evolutionary traits have been developed to protect the species – usually at the expense of whatever unlucky animal comes along for a bite. From the poison dart frog to the stinging nettle, there are very few options that humans can eat and feel better from. This idea is especially prevalent in mushrooms, where similar looking fungi can either be edible or deadly. Thankfully, we have thousands of years of human development and experimentation to credit for our current ability to safely choose our plant-based medicines and recreational adventures.

NATE WILLIAMS, FEATURES

BRUCE WOLF, PHOTOS

KATHERINE WOLF, FEATURES

LAURIE WOLF, RECIPES

We are creators of targeted, independent Cannabis journalism. Please email us to discuss advertising in the next issue of Alaska Leaf Magazine. We do not sell stories or coverage. We can offer design services and guidance on promoting your company’s medicinal, recreational, commercial or industrial Cannabis business, product or event within our magazine and on our website at www.LeafMagazines.com. Email ricker@leafmagazines.com to get started advertising with Alaska Leaf!

CONNECT WITH ALASKA LEAF

Going back to Cannabis, it seems beyond lucky that the trichomes and terpenes the plant develops and expresses to keep deer and bugs away, actually light up the human endocannabinoid system perfectly. And if you really want to trip out, don’t forget that it’s the same limonene terpenes in Cannabis that are also in citrus fruits!

I feel very blessed to have found our plant beneficial to my health needs, so much so that I started the Leaf in 2010 to share that truth and fight the war on drugs. Back then we didn’t have advanced extraction methods or even the science to isolate THC, let alone the amazing developments of today that have taken the plant into so many uncharted territories. Walk into a dispensary nowadays and you’ll see a whole pharmacy of options that’ll get you high and well at the same time … but what you won’t see in most states is the plant itself.

That’s why we decided to revamp our strains/genetics-themed edition with the official Flower Issue of the Leaf – to talk about the plant, share beautiful photos, and reconnect with the gift that grows from the ground for all of humankind’s benefit. Thank you for reading and sharing the Leaf, and as we head into springtime, please consider planting your own flowers once the dreaded April showers have concluded. There are few greater joys in life than growing and consuming your own Cannabis – an experience every lover of the plant should have at least once. Flower power for the win!

9 leafmagazines.com Mar. 2023 FREE ONLINE ARCHIVE @NWLEAF | @AKLEAFMAG @NWLEAF ISSUU.COM/NWLEAF Exclusive Cannabis Journalism EDITOR'S NOTE PHOTO by OSCAR AVELLANEDA-CRUZ @OKIAVE
ESTABLISHED 2010 THE ENLIGHTENED
VOICE
NORTHWEST LEAF / OREGON LEAF / ALASKA LEAF / MARYLAND LEAF / CALIFORNIA LEAF / NORTHEAST LEAF
“IT SEEMS BEYOND LUCKY THAT THE TRICHOMES AND TERPENES THE PLANT DEVELOPS AND EXPRESSES TO KEEP DEER AND BUGS AWAY, ACTUALLY LIGHT UP THE HUMAN ENDOCANNABINOID SYSTEM PERFECTLY.”
-Wes

SENATE COMMITTEE APPROVES CANNABIS RESEARCH FOR VETS

AU.S. Senate committee approved a bipartisan bill on February 18 to promote Cannabis research for military veterans. It is the first piece of standalone marijuana legislation to ever advance through a committee in the chamber.

Because the Senate Veterans’ Affairs Committee did not have a quorum present to act on the bill, members instead approved the legislation in a more informal “off the floor” session later in the day.

The VA Medicinal Cannabis Research Act was sponsored by panel Chairman Jon Tester (D-MT) and Sen. Dan Sullivan (R-AK). It is intended to mandate studies by the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) to explore the therapeutic potential of marijuana for veterans with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and chronic pain.

SOUTH

MARIJUANA SALES BILL FAILS TO PASS IN VIRGINIA

Virginia won’t begin Cannabis sales by 2024 after the last remaining bill to set up the market failed, reports WRIC. A GOP-controlled House of Delegates subcommittee voted 5-3 along party lines February 14 to kill legislation from Sen. Adam Ebbin (D-Alexandria) that would have paved the way for adult-use sales to begin next year.

Under current law, people 21 and up in Virginia can have up to an ounce of weed on them or grow up to four plants in their homes. Virginians can also buy marijuana for medicinal purposes with a medical authorization, but there’s no way for adults to purchase it for recreational use.

“The axed bill would have paved the way for adult-use sales to begin next year.”

The bill passed in 2021 to allow marijuana possession included a reenactment clause, which requires the General Assembly to approve the measure again and set a framework for retail sales. Lawmakers set a 2024 target for legal sales – but the efforts to create a regulatory framework for the market have continued to fail in the Republican-controlled General Assembly.

MEDICAL POT DEBATE CONTINUES IN N.C.

DEBATE ON the legalization of medical Cannabis in North Carolina resumed in the state senate on February 15, reports WLOS. A very similar bill creating the framework for its sale and use passed the full chamber by a wide margin just eight months ago.

The Senate Judiciary Committee debated but did not vote on new legislation, which was filed at the start of the new twoyear General Assembly session. Sen. Bill Rabon, a Brunswick County Republican, said he and his fellow sponsors wanted to review amendments before a committee meeting next week. Prospects for passage again in the Senate are strong this year. But the bill's future will likely rest in the House – which declined to take up the previous proposal before going home last summer. Speaker Tim Moore suggested recently that support was possible in his chamber this year for legalizing medicinal pot and would be particularly true with tight controls.

TWITTER CHANGES MIND ON POT ADS

TWITTER WILL NOW allow Cannabis advertising.

The change comes as the social media platform struggles for new revenue. The company updated its policies on February 5 to allow marijuana ads to run on its services in the states where weed is legal.

While other platforms have allowed marijuana-adjacent products, such as cannabidiol (CBD) to be advertised, Twitter has adopted the most explicit advertising opportunity for marijuana users within federal guidelines.

LEGALIZATION HAS CREATED 30K JOBS FOR ILLINOIS RESIDENTS

THE GOVERNOR OF ILLINOIS says that the state’s marijuana legalization law has created more than 30,000 jobs since the market launched in 2020.

During his State of the State and Budget address on February 15, Gov. J.B. Pritzker, a Democrat, touted the job creation figure, adding that “Illinois is home to the country’s most diverse Cannabis industry and some of the largest companies.”

east coast

NEW HAMPSHIRE PANEL APPROVES LEGALIZATION

ANew Hampshire legislative committee put its finishing touches on a revised bill to legalize marijuana, approving it February 15.

Members of the House Commerce and Consumer Affairs Liquor Subcommittee have been working on the legislation for weeks over a series of meetings. They debated a variety of provisions and amendments to the original measure that was filed by bipartisan House leaders.

The full committee accepted final amendments on February 15 and passed the bill in a 17-3 vote.

“...the state’s existing Liquor Commission will be in charge of regulating the marijuana market.”

A major change to the legislation from its introduced form would put the state’s existing Liquor Commission in charge of regulating the marijuana market, rather than create a new independent commission to do so, as was proposed in the original version of HB 639. The body would also be renamed the Liquor and Cannabis Commission.

NORMALIZATION

MINNESOTA D.A.R.E. READIES FOR LEGALIZATION

The D.A.R.E. program in Minnesota is preparing for the potential legalization of marijuana in the state.

“Illinois is home to the country’s most diverse Cannabis industry and some of the largest companies.”

He also included the marijuana company 4Front in a list of the “large businesses” that are “moving to and expanding in Illinois.”

“It’s becoming normalized, just like alcohol is and tobacco is by so many families,” fretted Executive Director Kathi Ackerman. “Other kids are going to do it.”

“Ackerman said the D.A.R.E. program will refrain from telling kids not to do marijuana, which they’ve found to be an ineffective strategy.”

Ackerman said the D.A.R.E. program will refrain from telling kids not to do marijuana, which they’ve found to be an ineffective strategy. They’ll continue to teach decision making habits that they hope will stray kids from early adoption.

“We want to delay, delay, delay the use of some of these chemicals,” Ackerman said.

U.S. states have legalized Cannabis. The first states to ever do so were CO and WA in 2012, and most recently in RI, MD and MO in 2022.

pounds is the amount of an Arkansas man’s illegal marijuana bust back in February.

53 increase in Florida medical marijuana patients has been seen in two years.

71%

$5.5m

$20m

was announced in grants for underserved marijuana retail areas in California.

MAR. 2023 leafmagazines.com 10 national news
MARIJUANA
STORIES by STEVE ELLIOTT, AUTHOR OF THE LITTLE BLACK BOOK
OF
21
was the fine for an unlicensed marijuana store called Jungle Boyz, located in lower Manhattan, according to the New York Post. $50k was donated by Tallahassee, FL-based MMJ company Trulieve last month to the Florida adult-use legalization campaign for the 2024 ballot.
politics
THE
THE NEWS IN BRIEF

BIRCH ALASKA

CBD Tincture

While I’m sure everyone in Alaska has heard enough bear jokes, I’ve always wondered: If a human eats a ton of THC before venturing out into the woods, does that make a human-edible? I’ve seen the viral news pieces about bears drinking beer, so let’s hope they don’t get a taste for weed, or we’re in trouble! As for us, we were happily surprised by how delicious the new lineup of Birch Alaska tinctures were that we would fight … oh, you get the picture.

CBD therapy is a huge part of finding wellness via Cannabis, with benefits that range from aiding inflammation and pain to anxiety and depression, and even helping to fight cancers and other illnesses. What we love the most about the Birch offerings is the high-potency CBD contained in the thoughtfully-crafted tincture. A good dose of CBD begins between 25-50mg per use – an easy addition to a drink or eaten straight with one or two droppers full – and one bottle will easily last weeks or longer for someone integrating CBD into their wellness routine.

These small-batch tinctures blend the best Alaskan ingredients with lab-tested, broad-spectrum CBD oil for a tasty experience that is 100% natural. Starting with Birch Chaga mushrooms (which grow high on trees and look almost like a blackened lump), these mushrooms are packed full of antioxidants that reduce inflammation, lower cholesterol and blood sugar, and can help boost your immune system. Combining this science-backed mushroom with wild cranberries, blueberries or honey depending on the flavor, delivers a holistic experience that’s also delicious.

We started with the Honey Chaga tincture, knowing that natural honey itself can have beneficial properties. The tincture is sweet, lightly tart and melts onto the palate easily, with a warming aftertaste that travels to the stomach – passing a glowing happy effect throughout the body. Delicious solo, the tincture is also perfect for a cup of tea or added to oatmeal. The same can be said for the fruity flavors, with the Blueberry Chaga tasting like a ripe berry patch that we drizzled on vanilla ice cream, and the Cranberry Chaga delivering a tart, lip-smacking flavor that adds sour power to iced tea or a smoothie.

The best part about these natural and locally-sourced tinctures is that they are so adaptable to whatever your needs or flavor desires are. And with so many out-of-state CBD companies offering less and charging more, it feels good to feel good by supporting a local brand. With a pet CBD option available now and new infused CBD honey sticks coming to the market, we can’t wait to see what Birch Alaska will bring to the table next.

12 EDIBLE OF THE MONTH REVIEW by WES ABNEY @BEARDEDLORAX/ALASKA LEAF @AKLEAFMAG | PHOTO by DANIEL BERMAN @BERMANPHOTOS Shake off the hibernation blues with a new CBD experience from Birch Alaska, featuring an infused Honey Chaga tincture that will turn even the grumpiest bear into a happy camper.
BIRCHALASKA.CO @BIRCHALASKA BLUEBERRY, CRANBERRY & HONEY CHAGA FLAVORS 1,000MG CBD PER BOTTLE
MAR. 2023 leafmagazines.com

Open 7 days a week 8am - 11pm

4901 E. Blue Lupine Dr. Ste. E Wasilla, AK 99654

907-631-3800

MARIJUANA HAS INTOXICATING EFFECTS AND MAY BE HABIT FORMING.

Marijuana has intoxicating effects and may be habit-forming and addictive. Marijuana impairs concentration, coordination, and judgment. Do not operate a vehicle or machinery under its influence. There are health risks associated with the consumption of marijuana. For use only by adults twenty-one and older. Keep out of the reach of children. Marijuana should not be used by women who are pregnant or breastfeeding. #10008

CONCENTRATION, COORDINATION, AND JUDGEMENT. DO NOT

MARIJUANA IMPAIRS

Wilson! Zero Rosin

DIVE INTO a fruity bouquet of spring flowers in this fresh-pressed Wilson! Zero rosin that’s undoubtedly the tastiest solventless dab we’ve found in Alaska.

Terp hunters and rosin lovers alike often feel like Tom Hanks’ character in “Cast Away” – yelling into the abyss for something that seems so unlikely to deliver. You could say that rosin is our Wilson, our comfort, a friend when all else seems lost. Just like Wilson was a friend until he floated away, so are the terps with each dab – delivering happiness like a warm hug from our favorite plant.

In reality, the WIlson! Zero has nothing to do with “Cast Away.” It’s a strain bred by Oni Seed Company that combines a Banana OG and Papaya #3 cross with a Tropicanna Cookies F1 male plant, re -

sulting in a unique expression of some of the heaviest-hitting fruity flavors in Cannabis. The end result is an intensely sweet and syrupy flavor that packs a huge punch when it comes to effects – getting most people high enough to consider talking to inanimate objects.

We were so stoked when we heard Polychrome Grass was making rosin, but our expectations were blown away from the first twist of the jar. The golden patty of terpy goodness oozes out fermented tropical fruit with citrusy gas and a hint of spicy vanilla that smells good enough to wear as cologne. The consistency is light and perfect for low-temp dabs, vaporizing

into an orangey-cookie-banana smoke that builds in the chest before a tingly, high-terpene exhale.

The vapor is so smooth that it tricks the mind into thinking that one needs another dab, but trust us when we say that this is as close to a one-anddone dab as they get. The Wilson!

Zero smacks into the frontal lobes with a drooly and red-eyed fury, slowing thoughts as waves of happiness crash into the mind and body. Stoney, uplifting and heavy all at the same time, this rosin has extracted the best elements of the strain for a solventless concentrate worthy of being highlighted in our Flower Issue.

mar. 2023 14 leafmagazines.com REVIEW by WES ABNEY @BEARDEDLORAX/ALASKA LEAF @AKLEAFMAG | PHOTO by DANIEL BERMAN @BERMANPHOTOS
POLYCHROME GRASS
POLYCHROMEGRASS.COM @POLYCHROMEGRASS 69.3% THC 10.58% TERPENES concentrate OF THE MONTH
"SMACKS INTO THE FRONTAL LOBES WITH A DROOLY AND RED-EYED FURY, SLOWING THOUGHTS AS WAVES OF HAPPINESS CRASH INTO THE MIND AND BODY."

SNACK ATTACK

SPECIAL NACHOS

SERVES 8

3 cups tortilla chips

3 green onions (white and green parts), chopped

1 small tomato, seeded and chopped

1 cup cheddar cheese sauce

1. Preheat the oven to 325°F.

2. Put the chips on a baking sheet and bake until light golden brown, turning once for 8 to 10 minutes.

3. Transfer the chips to a serving platter.

4. Top with the green onions and tomato.

5. Pour the cheese sauce over chips. Serve immediately.

This sauce is unbeatable on nachos, but it also has a myriad of other uses – which is good, because the recipe makes more than you’ll need for the nachos. We like to pour it on top of potato hash and a sunny-side-up egg for a weekend breakfast, or add it to a baked potato loaded with fresh vegetables for a quick and easy late-night snack. If you don’t have white pepper, black pepper works just as well.

Here are three of my favorite Cannabis-infused recipes that can serve as a snack, party food, or a fun night in front of a screen. For sure, I’ve had the nachos for dinner more times than I can count. I tend to cook the mushrooms a little longer than the recipe suggests, as I like when the mushrooms get very tender … with the melted cheese and crumbs they just melt in your mouth. And the bruschetta is a comforting combo of creamy ricotta and peas.

CHEDDAR CHEESE SAUCE

2 tablespoons butter

8 teaspoons canna butter

3 tablespoons all-purpose flour

1⁄2 teaspoon kosher salt

1⁄2 teaspoon white pepper

1 cup (whole or 2 percent) milk

1 cup heavy cream

2 ounces cream cheese, slightly softened

1 ½ cups freshly grated sharp cheddar pinch of ground nutmeg

1. In a medium saucepan, melt the butter and canna butter over low heat. Whisk in the flour, salt and white pepper, and cook for several minutes – stirring to remove the raw flour taste.

2. Slowly pour in the milk and cream, stirring constantly; this ensures a smooth and creamy consistency. Once the milk and cream have been added, add the cream cheese in three or four pieces, whisking between each addition.

3. Continue to cook the sauce over medium-low heat until it is thick enough to coat the back of a spoon, 7 to 10 minutes.

4. Reduce the heat to low and add the cheddar a ½ cup at a time, whisking between each addition, 5 to 6 minutes.

5. Remove the pan from the heat, stir in the nutmeg, and serve immediately.

MUSHROOMS SEVILLE STYLE

8 SERVINGS, 2 MUSHROOMS/PERSON

16 extra-large white button mushrooms, cleaned

2 tablespoons olive oil, plus extra for coating mushrooms

Salt (kosher or sea) and freshly ground black pepper, to taste

3⁄4 pound chorizo sausage (removed from casing if in links)

1⁄2 cup diced green onion (white and green parts)

2 garlic cloves, minced

1⁄2 small jalapeño, seeded and finely chopped

2 tablespoons plus 2 teaspoons canna-olive oil

1 Roma tomato, seeded and finely chopped

2/3 cup panko bread crumbs

3 ounces Neufchâtel cheese, at room temperature

1/3 cup cotija cheese, at room temperature

1⁄4 cup chopped cilantro, for garnish

1. Remove the stems from the mushrooms and chop.

2. In a medium skillet, heat the olive oil over medium heat. Add the sausage, and cook, breaking it up with a spoon into small pieces until all the pink has disappeared, 4 to 5 minutes

3. Add the chopped mushroom stems, green onion, garlic and jalapeño, and cook until the stems are tender, 2 to 3 minutes more.

4. Remove the skillet from the heat and stir in the canna oil, mixing thoroughly for 2 minutes.

5. Stir in the tomato, bread crumbs, Neufchâtel, cotija, and a pinch of salt and pepper.

6. Fill the mushroom caps with 1 ½ tablespoons each of the sausage mixture.

7. Bake the mushrooms until they are tender and the filling is golden brown on top, about 20 minutes.

8. Sprinkle with the cilantro and serve.

BRUSCHETTA WITH RICOTTA & PEAS

SERVES 4, TWO PIECES

EACH

8 slices peasant bread, lightly toasted

4 teaspoons canna-olive oil

1 cup ricotta cheese

Ricotta is a totally underutilized cheese. It’s spreadable and creamy, with a subtle flavor, and its texture pairs nicely with the crunch of toasted bread and the sweetness of peas in this recipe.

3 tablespoons plus 2 teaspoons olive oil, divided

2 tablespoons chopped onion or green onion

½ cup peas, fresh or frozen (thawed, if frozen) salt (kosher or sea) and freshly ground black pepper, to taste

1. Drizzle or brush the toasted bread with the canna olive oil, using ½ teaspoon per slice.

2. Spread 2 tablespoons of ricotta on each slice.

3. In a small skillet, heat 1 tablespoon of the olive oil. Add onions and sauté until they wilt slightly, 3 to 4 minutes.

4. Add the peas and sauté until they soften and are no longer vibrant green, 3 to 4 minutes more.

5. Divide the pea mixture among the bread slices.

6. Drizzle each slice with 1 teaspoon of the remaining olive oil and sprinkle with salt and pepper.

MAR. 2023 leafmagazines.com 16 RECIPES
WOLF @LAURIEANDMARYJANE for LEAF NATION | PHOTOS by BRUCE WOLF @BRUCE_WOLF
by LAURIE
MARCH HASHTAGS | #OutLikeALamb #BeKind #GoWomen #DontFearTheEdible #EatYourCannabis
COOKING WITH CANNABIS
All Things Cannabis For All People beardedlorax stashleylynn maaryjwhite rickerdj leaflifepodcast PODCAST THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS #208 DOUBLE STANDARDS #209 FULL SPECTRUM #211 VAN LIFE WATCH ON LEAF LIFE PODCAST V2 LISTEN EVERYWHERE THIS MONTH: Marijuana products may be purchased or possessed only by persons 21 or older. This product has intoxicating effects and may be habit-forming. Marijuana can impair concentration, coordination and judgment. Do not operate a vehicle or machinery under the influence of this drug. There may be health risks associated with consumption of this product. For use only by adults 21 and older. Keep out of reach of children. AMSTERDAMMED # 210 w/Bobby Black

ANCHORAGE TO HOMER

June 1st-Aug 31st

Monday – Friday

Departs Anchorage

Arctic & International – 724 W. International - Garrett’s Tesoro

Cooper Landing Wild- man’s 300pm

Soldotna Chamber of Commerce 500pm

All times are approx. Stage Line Summer Schedule

HOMER TO ANCHORAGE

June 1st-Aug 31st

Monday – Friday Departs Homer 830am 1242 Ocean Dr

Soldotna Chamber of Commerce 1015am

Cooper Landing Wildman’s 1115am

VISITING ALASKA

Locally owned and operated by a lifelong Alaskan, Stage Line offers passenger transportation, freight, parcel, and courier service, between Anchorage and the Kenai Peninsula. Our schedule includes, Anchorage to Homer, Cooper Landing, Soldotna, Kasilof, Ninilchik, Anchor Point. Homer to Seward, Soldotna, Cooper Landing. And any points in between! MP flag stops available! Private party charters available! Reasonable rates, saves time and money for travelling or your shipping needs.

One of the top 10 most scenic highways.

SEWARD TO HOMER

June 1st – August 31st

Mon Wed Fri

Departs Seward 100pm call ahead for pick up point

Cooper Landing Wild- man’s 200pm

Soldotna 300pm

All times are approx

HOMER TO SEWARD

June 1st - August 31st

Mon Wed Fri

Departs Homer 1242 Ocean Dr 900am

Soldotna Chamber of Commerce 1030am

Cooper Landing Wildman’s 1130

The Stage Line PO Box 353 Anchor Point, AK

The Stage Line 1242 Ocean Dr Homer, Ak 724 W International Anchorage, Ak Staging points only 907-868-3914 907-235-2252

E-mail: stage.line@yahoo.com www.stagelineinhomer.com

“Why fly? When you can enjoy the most beautiful ride on earth”
Sights seen from the road

CULTIVATED BY ALASKA FROSTED LOST AT

mar. 2023 leafmagazines.com 20 STRAIN OF THE MONTH

FLOWERS SEA C

oast into the deep and dark waters of the uniquely Alaskan strain Lost At Sea … whose genetics are a mystery, but effects are

as real as the tides and waves of stoniness that wash the mind into a blissful calm.

The only difference between being ‘lost at sea’ and a ‘vacation from humanity’ is whether or not you remembered to pack your stash. They say it’s always important to be prepared, especially when you head out into the unknown of the ocean –but would it really be all that bad if you could spend the whole time getting high? These are the types of thoughts that creep into the mind after big tokes of this aptly-named strain.

Grown in Alaska for many years, the legend I was told is that Lost At Sea came from a lone seed in a trim tray that was allowed to flower and deliver its bounty. Cannabis strains sometimes drop a seed or two even when not pollinated or intentionally producing seeds, but most people bemoan their bad luck and toss the potential gift from the weed gods. That’s my favorite part about this strain – the lost and found nature that speaks to all of us in our journey before and after Cannabis.

Popping your nose into a deli-style jar of the buds at Green Jar fills the senses with warming blueberry and woodsy-piney gas, with a touch of Kush to wrap it all up. Complex and rich, there's a spiciness that teases the senses while breaking up the super-frosty and well-cured nugs. The light-green buds are coated in trichomes and a few red hairs, making for a beautiful flower that breaks up easily into a bowl or joint.

First tokes are sweet, fruity and gassy, with notes of citrus and cheesy apples dominating the exhalation. Repeated tokes are smooth and stay sweet – so much so that the cleanliness of the exhale kept us coming back for more.

Effects settle over the mind like a warm, fur-lined hood being pulled over the head, comforting and warming while sending a happy and relaxed vibe to the extremities.

Definitely an indica by nature (but with a cerebral joy that can make even swabbing the decks fun), this is the perfect strain to occupy the mind and free the body – as well as the one we’d be sure to pack in our oceanic go-bag. Luckily our herbs don’t need to come in by ship and we can easily head to Green Jar in the Valley for an Alaska Frosted Flowers daytrip … no paddles required.

THC | 1.43% TERPENES | INDICA HYBRID

REVIEW
WES
@BEARDEDLORAX/ALASKA LEAF @AKLEAFMAG
by
ABNEY
| PHOTO by DANIEL BERMAN @BERMANPHOTOS
Sweet, fruity and gassy, with notes of citrus and cheesy apples dominating the exhalation.
22.5

SOLVENTLESS EXTRACTS USING PURE, ALASKAN GLACIER WATER FOR EXTRACTION

WARNING Marijuana has intoxicating effects and may be habit forming and addictive. Marijuana impairs concentration, coordination, and judgment. Do not operate a vehicle or machinery under its influence. There are health risks associated with consumption of marijuana. For use only by adults twenty-one and older. Keep out of the reach of children. Marijuana should not be used by women who are pregnant or breast feeding.

We have CBDs! Frontier CBD * Hemp Bomb * Honey Root * Alaskan Healing Center 224 N Yenlo St, Wasilla, AK | 907-373-2839 | M-F 8a-10p, Sat 10a-10p, Sun 11a-7p
THE FLOWER ISSUE 24 PODDY MOUTH HUMBOLDT SEED COMPANY

GANJA GLOSSARY

BAG APPEAL The look and attractiveness of a finished flower. This element plays a significant role in how a product will sell – even if the product itself doesn’t smoke as good as it looks.

CALYX Leafy cocoon-like petals in which seeds typically form.

CMH Ceramic Metal Halide. A commonly used type of lighting for indoor Cannabis cultivation.

COCO Refers to shredded coconut husks, which is a commonly used grow medium that splits the difference between soilless and living soil.

CULTIVAR A more scientifically accurate term for “strain.”

FULL TERM A Cannabis plant that has been grown outside to full maturity – also commonly referred to as full sun, sungrown or outdoor. Also a designation for method of cultivation.

HASH STRAIN A cultivar selected particularly for its ability to yield commercially viable volumes of bubble hash when processed. Thanks to the continually increasing interest in and sales of solventless concentrates, these sought-after cultivars are guiding growers’ decisions on what to produce.

HID High Intensity Discharge. A commonly used type of lighting for indoor Cannabis cultivation.

HPS High Pressure Sodium. A commonly used type of lighting for indoor Cannabis cultivation.

HYDRO Short for hydroponics – a method of cultivation in which soil is not used. This style of growing sparked a wave of innovation for indoor cultivation hardware and techniques after the discovery that hydroponically-produced buds displayed bag appeal the likes of which had never been seen before.

HYPE STRAIN Any cultivar that is new and gaining popularity quickly –a simultaneously complimentary and derogatory term.

INDOOR Cannabis cultivated in a fully enclosed, indoor environment, allowing for an unmatched degree of control by the grower.

LED Light Emitting Diode. A rapidly growing type of lighting for indoor Cannabis cultivation that offers lower power usage than other indoor lighting options.

LIGHT DEP Short for light deprivation. A style of cultivation that utilizes greenhouses with the ability to block out light – tricking Cannabis plants into entering the flowering cycle. Psych!

LIVING SOIL Biologically-active grow medium filled with living microbial organisms – it’s alive!

MEDIUM Refers to the type of material a Cannabis plant was grown in. Generally, the more natural it is, the better the end product. But don’t take our word for it … find out for yourself!

PHENOTYPE Scientifically speaking, it’s a set of observable characteristics resulting from the interaction between an individual’s genotype and the environment. In layman’s terms, it’s the unique expression of a particular plant.

PISTIL The female organs of a flower.

ROCKWOOL A soilless inert grow medium made from rock and other minerals that have been melted down and turned into a fibrous wool-like material.

SINGLE SOURCE Applies to inhouse vertical integration in terms of product production on at least two levels. Most often, this term is applied to concentrates that were produced by the same group or individual that grew the material that was processed. When applied to flower, it tends to mean that all the flower found under that label was produced in-house.

SMALLS Cannabis buds from the lower portions of a plant that don’t receive as much light, and therefore don’t grow into large, full-size colas.

STIGMA The part of a pistil that receives the pollen during pollination.

TERPENES Terps for short. Organically occurring compounds largely responsible for a cultivar’s smell and taste.

ZAZA OR ZA Slang for exotic. Largely used by trappers and traditional market cultivators to describe “high grade” or “top shelf” Cannabis that is very often not “high grade” or “top shelf.”

STORY by NATE WILLIAMS @NATEW415 for LEAF NATION | PHOTO by ERIK CHRISTIANSEN @ERIK.NUGSHOTS @THEHUMBOLDTSEEDCOMPANY
A REEFERENCE GUIDE 25

TOP OF THE POTS

WITH ALL OF THE NEW HEAT BEING HUNTED BY BREEDERS AROUND THE COUNTRY, WE COULDN’T HELP BUT BE CURIOUS: WHAT ARE THE MOST POPULAR STRAINS BY REGION?

So we teamed up with the data analysts at Headset – a company that tracks and aggregates retail sales data for the Cannabis industry – to take a look at the current trends in Cannabis cultivars. There’s some overlap (hey there, Runtz crosses) and a few not-so-surprises (Blue Dream was still in the top 10 in almost every market). It’s worth noting that the top cultivar in every state was actually classified as “Other” because many retailers don’t always input the strain data into their systems –something that will continue to evolve as the industry matures. Check out the top five strains from each these seven states, ranked by sales and market share.

MAR. 2023 26 leafmagazines.com THE FLOWER ISSUE
@CANNABOMBTOM/LEAF NATION

WASHINGTON

1. Wedding Cake

2. GG#4

3. Runtz

4. Gelato

5. Blue Dream

OREGON

1. Runtz

2. Bananas

3. Ice Cream Cake

4. GMO Cookies

5. Blueberry Muffin

CALIFORNIA

1. Gelato

2. Wedding Cake

3. Runtz

4. Cereal Milk

5. Garlic cookies

NEVADA

1. Wedding Cake

2. Runtz

3. GMO Cookies

4. Gelato

5. Head Cheese

MICHIGAN

1. Runtz

2. Kush Mints

3. Crescendo

4. Garlic cookies

5. Wedding Cake COLORADO

1. Blue Dream

2. MAC

3. GG4

4. Durban Poison

5. Glueball

MASSACHUSETTS

1. Wedding Cake

2. Runtz

3. Garlic cookies

4. Zkittlez

5. Cheese

headset.io @headset_io

ARCHIVE SEED BANK

EXOTIC GENETIX

One of Oregon’s most famous Cannabis brands and the creators of the Moonbow (Zkittlez x Dosidos). Smokers outside the Beaver State may recognize them from their partnership with Connected and Alien Labs. Archive has an unnatural talent for breeding stunning pairings that bring out the best in their parentage. In 2022, they caused heart palpitations by dropping their newest hit, Oishii. Essentially a Moonbow backcross, they described it as “a Damascus blade of candy gas.” Watch out for the next big advancement, as they work on a whole line of hybrids involving Oishii pollen, including a Zkittlez x Oishii cross.

archiveseedbank.com

@archiveseedbank

You can’t put out a Flower Issue without talking about breeders. And you can’t talk about breeders without mentioning the following heat seekers responsible for some of the biggest breakthroughs in Cannabis genetics.

Mike from Exotic Genetix started breeding after seeing the medical patients at the grow shop he worked at having to deal with round after round of substandard, or worse, tainted genetics. The journey that began in a tiny hydroponic store in Tacoma, Wash. has given rise to a brand that’s put out a non-stop playlist of hits like Purple Lambo, Buckin Runtz, Whipped Cherries and Red Pop. That first one was the strain behind California Leaf’s last concentrate of the month. On the future horizon, expect to see people tripping out on new Falcon-9 crosses like Lazer Fuel, Red Rager, Neon Sunshine and Yikes.

exoticgenetix.com

@exoticgenetix_official

HEAT SEEKERS

MAR. 2023 28 leafmagazines.com THE FLOWER ISSUE

TIKI MADMAN

A Michigan grower who’s been lighting up the Pacific Coast, Tiki’s been breeding for the last decade – but he popped his first seed when he was only 13 years old. The brand has a reputation for its own outstanding work and collaborations with other legends Cannabis Corey and Mosca Seeds. Tiki Madman has always had a focus on growing for developing strains instead of bag appeal. One of their major heaters is the Devil Driver (Tiki’s Cut Sundae Driver x Melonade). In June of 2022, they dropped the Devil Driver Fems collection, mixing it with Snowman, Lazy Lemon and Toaster Strudel. Tiki Madman has always had a focus on growing for developing strains instead of bag appeal.

tikimadman.com

@tikimadman

SEEKERS

Few breeders are out on the scene like Compton, California’s Masonic. When not running his shop, recording an episode of a podcast, or helping out at an industry event, he’s hard at work in his backyard tending chicken and breeding new hits. Famous for creating Wilson (Banana OG x Papaya) x Tropicana Cookies, his newest accolade is Banana God – a Banana OG x Wilson that’s been gaining attention after winning the gold at Ego Clash 2022. On April 15, he’ll be hosting his third annual Free Seed Day in L.A. Last year saw 1,000 people gathered together to share the joy of cultivation.

masonicseeds.co | @masonicsmoker4.0

MASONIC SEED CO. LANDRACE PRESERVATION SOCIETY

This nonprofit collective is all about being the most authentic and reliable source for heirloom and landrace cultivars from around the world. As more and more hybrid strains come onto the market, this group wants to make sure some of the unique strains that are part of our history aren’t lost to time. One example of this is their Pure Magic, a Himalayan cultivar from Northern India which is bred for Charas production. LPS lines are primarily bred and acclimatized in Oregon’s North Coast and Willamette Valley regions. Selected over generations, their genetics “strive to recreate the mystery and magic of the Cannabis world of the ’60s and ’70s.”

landracepreservationsociety.org

@landrace_preservation_society

STORY by MATT JACKSON @ACTIONMATTJACKSON for LEAF NATION

AN ODE TO

Walk into nearly any supermarket these days, and you’ll find organic options for products like produce, meat, coffee and wine. Now, the Cannabis industry is finally starting to follow suit.

Organic Cannabis is grown naturally, without the addition of man-made pesticides, chemicals or genetically-modified organisms. This eliminates the risk of inhaling toxins lingering from the growing process and results in flower that is richer in cannabinoids, terpenes and flavonoids. With reduced health risks, stronger effects and more developed flavor profiles, it’s no wonder why organically-grown ganja is in higher demand

than ever before. And as more consumers are seeking out organic flower in dispensaries, more cultivators are starting to adopt organic and regenerative farming practices in their grow. Wanting to learn more, I linked up with Michael Jie-Shen Fang – one of the most prolific breeders, growers and entrepreneurs in the organic Cannabis space known by most simply as “Fang” – to find out what originally sparked his own obsession with organic flower.

Starting back at the very beginning, he tells me about growing up in a little pocket of Orange County that was mostly “concrete jungle and fast food” with health struggles that left him constantly in and out of the doctors and on medication. It wasn’t until moving from SoCal to the Bay Area for college that he learned what the term “organic” even meant.

“Being at UC Berkeley, there were a lot of good natural influences,” Fang tells me. “It was the first time I was exposed to Whole Foods,

Berkeley Bowl and all these co-ops, and the farmers market scene was popping. It was really the culture of the Bay Area that influenced me and opened my eyes to things I didn’t know existed. When I discovered there was even a concept of being holistic and regenerative – relying on your own immune system, using herbs and mushrooms and all this goodness – I was blown away.”

Fang continues to explain more about how the culture of the Bay Area changed his mindset and inspired him to go all in on organic. “I was always so sick and I couldn’t figure out why. It wasn’t until I started this holistic lifestyle and doing the organic thing that I was freed from a lot of those ailments,” he explains. “I felt a lot of my pain and discomfort fade away and was actually healthy for the first time. As soon as I became more intentional about my consumption, and stayed away from anything that wasn’t grown holistically by people that cared – that’s what changed everything.”

MAR. 2023 30 leafmagazines.com THE FLOWER ISSUE
PORTAL (CAKE X CPKB)

ORGANIC

This commitment to the organic lifestyle quickly extended far beyond just food and into Fang’s Cannabis garden. “When I started focusing more on nutrient density and knowing where my food came from, it made me realize I should do that for my plants, too,” he tells me. “I’ve grown in every different way, and it just became obvious through trying different methods that organic was the best way forward. It was a natural progression.”

A natural progression indeed … one that eventually led him to co-found Gage Green Group, a Cannabis collective focused on furthering organic breeding and fostering collaboration amongst the organic community. A trailblazer in the space and household name amongst any organic OG, Fang’s work now has numerous facets: GGG Natural (a line of adaptogenic mushroom and herbal formulations), Seed

Bank International (an elite genetics catalog featuring some of the most renowned breeders across the globe) and Genetic Designer (his newest passion project for genetic research and seed drops).

He’s also gone into event production, starting The Organic Cup – the only Cannabis competition and trade show dedicated exclusively to natural gardeners – because as he puts it, “Nobody really focuses on organics. It’s basically an afterthought. But for me, it’s my lifeblood, so it just felt logical to start an organic-focused event. Even though not everybody understands it, this lifestyle is the only thing I can really stand behind. Everything I do has an organic or natural aspect to it.”

With Organic Cup events in Michigan, New York and now Barcelona, Fang continues to empower organic breeders and growers all around

the world. When I ask how he envisions the future of organic farming and the Cannabis industry, his eyes light up and we eventually end up back at the supermarket analogy.

“I started from a place where I’d go to the store and there’d be nothing for me. And now there might be a whole section of local or organically-sourced foods,” says Fang. “Cannabis is starting to look the same, and the fact that most new growers are starting as natural farmers shows that the future is trending in that aspect. It’s really awesome to see that slight shift, even though there’s a lot more work to do.”

@f4nggggggg

@therealgagegreengroup

@seedbankinternational

@geneticdesigner

STORY by KATHERINE WOLF @KATADELLIC/LEAF NATION | PHOTOS COURTESY MICHAEL JIE-SHEN FANG
"This commitment to the organic lifestyle quickly extended far beyond just food and into Fang’s Cannabis garden."
For Michael Jie-Shen Fang, organic farming is about more than just flower – it’s a way of life.
JUICY (RS-11 X CPKB) GUACAMOLE (OREOZ X NYCSD)

EXPLORING THE SEXY ACT OF CANNABIS COPULATION

AH, CANNABIS.

We can’t think of another plant on earth that is more coveted or revered. Its practical uses are too numerous to mention, due at least in part to its biodiversity. What other plant inspires devotees to wait in lines longer than city blocks just to sample new variations in its genetic potential? At the same time, stalwart stewards care for individual living genetics for a quarter century or more, just to preserve the legacy and exact breed that may one day prove to be the elixir, flavor, or antidote we always needed.

All of this magic springs from the simple, sexy act of Cannabis copulation. In the wild, this birds and the bees story might seem pretty traditional.

A male plant pollinates a nearby female plant, usually with the help of the autumn

for breeding “super plants” was possible, Cannabis was illegal. Pioneered by brave stoners over the past 60 years, the legacy of guerrilla breeding is unprecedented and the heritage and oral history should be studied. No other plant has ever been bred in thousands of garages and basements all over the world, each breeder having their own easel of local genetics, working with the canvas of their regional terroir and the demand of their local Cannabis enthusiasts.

Conventional plant breeders might not view the work of our outlaw community over the past 60 years as a real breeding program, but there is no denying that the sheer number of participants, the love for the plant, and traditional breeding practices are responsible for almost all of the major advances in Cannabis genetics. Popular strains known the world over have come

CANNA

breeze. But for Cannabis, sex is actually the exception of the plant kingdom, not the rule. Only six percent of plant species have separate male and female individuals, so most plants can just take care of themselves when they’re in the mood. Sounds a bit lonely (and boring). With Cannabis, the amazing diversity and fast transformations breeders see can be attributed to having two parents – while most plants often have just one.

Beyond the two sexes, Cannabis coitus and evolution have been influenced by humanity. We know for sure that people have used Cannabis medicinally for at least 5,000 years. It’s more than likely that plants with better qualities were selected for survival and propagation and over time, were shared by nomads around Asia, Europe and Africa.

Humans have been self-motivated matchmakers for millennia, and the evolution of the alluring Cannabis flower progressed slowly for eons through both natural and human influence.

Ironically, prohibition may have actually saved Cannabis from the monoculture we see in today's “Big Ag” settings and helped preserve landrace varieties. As we all know, weed has been vilified by racists and greedy businessmen since the early 20th century, so by the time transcontinental world travel and the communication necessary

from unwitting hobbyists, a random seed in a bag of bud, or an overlooked male plant that turned out to be a blessing in disguise. After all, anyone who plays can win the lottery, and judging weed is a pretty subjective effort – with conflicting opinions on what's dank happening as often as consensus. More often than not, if a specific terpene profile or cannabinoid ratio doesn't speak to you, it's just that you haven't tried it in the right context. Who knows? Maybe having the best kind of Cannabis is as simple as having a lot of different kinds of Cannabis…

We think that the smartest breeders would seek to preserve just as often as they create. Just a few years ago, nobody wanted purple flowers … now they're the bee’s knees, fetching top dollar. Suddenly those purple strains stashed in the back of the seed vault are pretty important. Breeding techniques could easily take Cannabis in the direction of corn and soybeans (where one variety makes up 98% of the market), but if we choose a different path and embrace variety, we can use these powerful tools to create an economy that’s diverse – while protecting the individuality of the plant, as it speaks to each of us.

They say happiness held is a seed, but happiness shared is a flower. And it turns out, love is just like wildflowers – often found in the most unlikely places.

MAR. 2023 34 PHOTOS
@ERIK.NUGSHOTS @THEHUMBOLDTSEEDCOMPANY leafmagazines.com THE FLOWER ISSUE
by ERIK CHRISTIANSEN
STORY by TOM BOWERS @CANNABOMBTOM/LEAF NATION, NATHANIEL PENNINGTON @THEHUMBOLDTSEEDCOMPANY, AND ERIK CHRISTIANSEN @ERIK.NUGSHOTS

SUTRA

“No other plant has ever been bred in thousands of garages and basements all over the world, each breeder having their own easel of local genetics, working with the canvas of their regional terroir and the demand of their local Cannabis enthusiasts.”

HAVE YOU EVER HEARD THE PHRASE “FOR LACK OF A BETTER WORD?” It means that you’re searching your vocabulary to find the most applicable language that best represents what you’re trying to convey. Sometimes you don’t have the exact word, but by using this phrase, you make it known that your intention is to communicate your thought effectively. And it’s totally cool. Because it is understood by the person with whom you’re interacting that although you don’t currently have the best articulation, you are also not trying too hard to impress.

And that is what’s wrong with how the word “perfect” is wielded today. People overuse it believing they are demonstrating wisdom by applying it where a less fabulous word would normally go – thinking that it boosts their ability to elocute “perfect” words. Which makes sense. Because the current “me” society that displays their filtered flawlessness on the internet as a quantified representation of who they are, is hiding from the word “imperfect.”

That’s one you won’t hear them use.

It’s absurd. A trigger. How dare you!

The overplay of the word “perfect” is an encapsulation of this artificially intelligent future we are doing “The Robot” into. Perception is largely reality, and the word accentuates the image people pretend to possess. There’s this idea that if you say something “perfect,” then “perfection” will materialize – which realistically doesn’t happen. Just because you use the word to describe something as “perfect,” doesn’t make it “perfect.”

So, when the woman who answers the phone in customer service gleefully uses the word more than twice for the figurative cherry on the sundae, she is in essence informing herself that not only did she resolve the issue, but it couldn’t have been handled any more “perfectly.”

But no, I’m sorry … the last four digits of my Social Security number are not perfect. They are just OK. You know what’s perfect? Cannabis. And Agnes, my pet gerbil.

38 LEAFMAGAZINES.COM mar. 2023 stoney baloney FOLLOW @RICKERDJ // GET THE AUDIO VERSION & EVERY EPISODE AT LEAFMAGAZINES.COM

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