New Wine Magazine - Issue 53 - Autumn 2011

Autumn

Let’s stick together 20 per cent of British children will experience their parents splitting up by their third birthday. How can we change this statistic?

p.44

Teaching

Stories

Culture

Africa’s paradox of plenty How wealth can exacerbate poverty p.18

Our job is to invest in the next generation Interview with Mike Pilivachi p.30

Sociality & The Trinity Connecting with a Facebook generation p.40

Iron SharpenS Iron A day for men who want to make a difference

‘Join us for a day of learning, inspiration, encouragement and friendship.’

Saturday 12 November 2011 – Watford Saturday 21 January 2012 – Manchester With Carl Beech, Mark Melluish, Anthony Delaney & Patrick Dixon (Watford only)

Find out more and book online at www.new-wine.org

o t e t c a e n r t A e r v

d A

A weekend to equip 18-30s for radical Kingdom living Hosted by Pete & Bee Hughes

Fri 6 – Mon 9 January 2012

Center Parcs, Sherwood Forest, Nottingham

Fri 13 – Mon 16 January 2012 Center Parcs, Elveden Forest, Suffolk

Want FREE copies of the New Wine Magazine for your church? Email us at: info@new-wine.org

News Teaching Stories Culture

Autumn 11 Issue 53

Would you like to advertise?

0208 799 3777 advertising@new-wine.org The next edition will be published in January 2012.

The advert booking deadline is 4 November 2011.

Editor Mark Melluish Magazine Manager Lucy Williams Commissioning Editor Clare Rogers Advertising & Classifieds Jeremy Geake Jonathan Tearne Creative Tom Morton Print Halcyon Find us: 4a Ridley Avenue Ealing London W13 9XW

What’s happening.

Learn together.

Our God at work.

Looking at our world.

Phone us: 0845 437 8656

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Fax us: 0208 799 3770 Email us: mag@new-wine.org Visit our website: www.new-wine.org Cut and Paste You can copy text from the New Wine Magazine into local newsletters, church magazines and similar non-commercial communications provided you put a credit line: ‘This material copyright New Wine Magazine and used with permission’.

(This excludes any material marked ©).

New Wine Magazine is published three times a year by the New Wine Trust as part of their mission. Your feedback is welcomed; letters may be edited and published in future issues.

We want to look after our environment so we’ve used a recyclable paper.

Please recycle.

PEFC/16-33-344

Promoting sustainable forest management. www.pefc.co.uk

A note from John Coles Change is possible

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Editor’s Letter Our God is a good God

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Kids’ Christmas Event in a Box

An opportunity to share Jesus with countless children across the UK

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I came not to bring peace but the sword Putting Jesus above all else

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Africa’s Paradox of Plenty Shining a light on corruption

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God of Genocide?

The concluding part of this controversial series

An update on our network of over 1,000 leaders

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Our job is to invest in the next generation Mike Pilavachi talks youth work

Sociality & The Trinity Why we can’t stop blogging, tweeting & poking

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Let’s Stick Together Improving the odds for parents of young children

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From Parish to Network Mission in different shapes and sizes

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Baroness Caroline Cox offers an answer

Where is God in a Humanitarian Crisis?

Bringing God aboard a London ambulance

Stories, news, a picture quiz and more

Networks Changing Nations

An inspirational array of your good God stories

Faith at Work

Bits & Pieces

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Summer 11

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A Shout Out for Suffering!

Bringing our uncensored complaints before Jesus

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When Church is Truly Local Changing the reputation of a deprived, crime-ridden estate

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Recommended Resources A selection of new product reviews

NEWS

A note from John Coles Dear Friends Why is ‘why?’ so difficult a question to answer? I was asked many times by many different people of different nationalities at the European New Wine conference this summer, ‘Why are those riots happening in England?’

There was a genuine sense of shock that this could happen on such a scale in a nation which has been at the forefront of the development and practice of modern liberal tolerant social democracy.

Many different answers have been proffered, and the finger of blame has been pointed at people groups such as black youth, middle-aged hardened criminals and pure opportunists, and at social and political issues such as lax parenting, inadequate policing, poverty, lack of employment, government cuts and the recession.

In the midst of such obvious breakdown of society we do well to remember the words of Jesus to his people, ‘You are the light of the world’ (Matt 5.14).

And I’m also reminded of Pastor Bill Hybels’ (Willow Creek Community Church, IL, USA) statements that ‘the local church is the hope of the world’ and ‘it’s the church or it’s lights out’.

It’s been wonderful to hear of Christians at the forefront of responding to the riots; manning the streets urging teenagers to return home, providing refreshments for emergency services, visiting the elderly and frightened, and providing basic supplies for those who lost everything. This type of care for the community becomes a voice that is often louder and more persuasive than any sermon.

Looking ahead, we need to see further mobilisation of God’s people. More of us need to communicate the way that Jesus changes lives, gives us the desire and grace to serve others, and restores hope to every person and every nation. We need to become ‘shapers’ of the next generation, whether through teaching in schools, serving in the community, or involvement in politics or the media. And we need to see church-planting ventures into areas of our cities which have for generations been denuded of vibrant church life.

We also need to cry out to the Lord for his intervention. Unless God breaks through there will be no breakthrough, and our society will continue to unravel. We must call out to God to revive his work, set our hearts on fire by his Spirit, and change the nation! And I believe change is possible, not because I am an optimist, but because God has promised it: ‘If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land’ (2 Chr 7.14).

Let us be those people, and let our God become the God of this nation!

With every blessing

John Coles Director of New Wine 4

New Wine’s vision To see the nation changed through Christians experiencing the joy of worshipping God, the freedom of following Jesus, and the power of being filled with the Spirit.

To see churches renewed, strengthened and planted, living out the word of God in every aspect of life, serving God by reaching the lost, broken and poor, and demonstrating the good news of the kingdom of God to all.

New Wine’s values Continuity & Change – we want to be faithful guardians of an unchanging message about the person and work of Jesus, and the need for personal salvation and sanctification, while also adapting ways of worship, teaching, being church and doing mission according to culture and context.

Cross & Resurrection – we want to honour all that Jesus has done for us on the cross, and to embrace the way of the cross for ourselves, while also knowing the power of his resurrection to set us free.

Gracious & Truthful – we want to be kind and generous in the way we think and speak about others whether they agree or disagree with us, while also clearly communicating what we believe and why we believe it.

Leadership & Every-member ministry – we want to train and deploy anointed, courageous and missional church leaders, while also equipping every Christian to serve like Jesus in their home, church, work and life-place.

Mission & Community – we want to see the church become a missionary movement to love and reach the lost, to care for the poor and to bring justice to our homes, neighbourhoods, workplaces and nations, while also being a gracefilled community in which people can find relationship, healing, faith, hope and love.

Natural & Supernatural – we want to see every Christian using all the natural reason, wisdom and skill that they can, while also learning to operate in the supernatural gifts of the Spirit to minister to others in love and power as Jesus did.

Now & Not yet of the Kingdom – we want to proclaim the good news of the kingdom of God and to see that confirmed by miraculous signs and wonders, while also ministering grace to all, knowing that suffering will be part of life until Jesus returns and makes all things new.

Transcendence & Presence – we want to live lives that celebrate God’s awesome power, transcendent majesty and sovereign work, while at the same time experiencing his intimate presence as we encounter him in heartfelt worship.

Unity & Diversity – we want to work with everyone who holds these values in open, mutually accountable friendship, while also acknowledging and honouring differences in leadership style, church characteristics and denominational emphasis.

Word & Spirit – we want to derive all we believe, teach and do from the Bible as the written word of God, while also learning to hear and obey the voice of the Spirit speaking to us individually and collectively.

KINGDOM TRAINING DAYS

Just ÂŁ10 per person.

COMPELLED SPIRIT BY THE With John Coles and the New Wine Leadership Team Make space to connect with other leaders, and for leadership-focussed teaching and prayer ministry

9 November 2011: Cheltenham 10 November 2011: Stockport 11 November 2011: London

NatioNal leadership CoNfereNCe REACTIVATING THE MISSIONAL CHURCH

Hosted by John Coles and the New Wine Leadership Team, with guest speakers alan Hirsch and anne Maclaurin For anyone involved in leadership in the local church

Monday 28 - Wednesday 30 May 2012

Harrogate InternatIonal ConferenCe Centre

discounts available for under 30s!

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EDITOR’S LETTER

NEWS

UPCOMING EVENTS OCTOBER 2011 Welcome to the latest edition of the New Wine magazine. Having come back from the summer conferences we are even more aware of the good God that we have, the good news that we are called to communicate, and the desperate need there is in this country for this to be spread further afield.

The August rioting caused many of us anxious nights and gave us anxious hearts as we saw something we haven’t seen for a long time unfold across our country.

It also strengthened our resolve to share something of the love and light of Christ in our communities.

Our God is a good God. We have to begin there even though we don’t always understand his actions. Just over two years ago my youngest son, having fallen from a balcony, literally came back from the dead. While he was in hospital and in a state of unconsciousness, Lindsay and I sent a message to our church that, whatever happens, we believe our God is a good God and is a God who heals.

An amazing miracle followed and our son is now fully recovered. It isn’t always the case and many people live with great trouble. It might be the lack of a job, a serious illness, a marriage that’s going wrong, you are single and hope to be married, you long for a child and it hasn’t happened, or the teenagers have gone off the rails. Many things can take our focus off the fact that we have a good God. Over the summer we were reminded that we have a nation that needs to hear about him; let’s not lose our focus on what God is calling us to do in seeing this nation changed.

This magazine offers stories of a God who has done amazing things, healed people in the most unexpected ways, and restored relationships; a God who is bringing new life in difficult places. Read and enjoy, be inspired, and don’t hesitate to contact me if you have any feedback.

This comes with my prayers and love as always.

Mark Melluish Editor mag@new-wine.org 6

Youth Work Training Day 22 October London

November 2011 Special Needs Training Day 5 November Cheltenham Day of Prayer ‘11 5 November Oxford Prophetic Gifting Training Days 5 November Scarborough & Manchester Kingdom Training Days 9 November Cheltenham 10 November Stockport 11 November London Youth Work Training Day 12 November Stockport Men’s Day 12 November Watford Kids Leaders’ Conference 23 – 25 November Swanwick Re-imagining church Revitalising mission (New Wine & Fresh Expressions) 28 – 29 November Swanwick

January 2012 Retreat to Advance (18s-30s) 6 – 9 January Center Parcs, Sherwood Forest 13 – 16 January Center Parcs, Elveden Forest Women & Leadership Conferences 13 – 15 January Bristol 19 – 21 January Rotherham (2 – 4 February Windsor) Men’s Day 22 January Manchester Learning to Heal Training Day 28 January Aylesbury

Also in 2012: Rural & UPA Leaders’ Forums, Family Time Conference, Women’s Days, Youth Work Training Day, Heart Head Hands Worship Conferences, Leadership Conference, and more.

To find out more about all our events and to book, go to www.new-wine.org/events

Leadership Conference May 2011 Adelphi Hotel, Liverpool

Leadership Conference May 2011 Trinity Cheltenham

Kids Workers Training Day May 2011 Trinity Cheltenham

‘These conferences are always significant...I am still amazed that two problems I have had for years, Carpel Tunnel Syndrome and an underactive thyroid, were highlighted at the same time! Since then I have had no pain in my hand. I wait expectantly for blood test results to see if my thyroid has kicked into life!’ [Marilyn confirmed in August 2011 that blood test results – thyroid, cholesterol and glucose – were all within normal limits!]

‘This year we have faced some hard situations in the group of six parishes that we lead. We were hesitant to sign up for the conference as previous ones had not really related to the situation in our small churches, but felt encouraged by the Lord to come. From the start it was brilliant – through every session and seminar God ministered to us and encouraged us.’

‘God has really challenged me this year regarding ‘soaking’ and bringing the children into God’s presence, rather than leaning towards ‘head-knowledge’.

It is such a blessing and so exciting to realise that this is a growing feeling worldwide and not just my own whim!’

Marilyn Zipfel, St Mark’s, Oulton Broad, Lowestoft

Leadership Conference May 2011 Ealing Christian Centre, London ‘I have been so inspired and refreshed to go back to ministering in a very isolated setting. I have shared the teaching with my fellow leaders. Really felt ready to go back and get on with it again.’

Mary, Footsteps Fresh Expression of Church, Rome, Italy

‘God really broke my heart in a new way for the lost in the borough of Scarborough. The teaching confirmed what God has been saying to us about the need for church unity, and for the church to get out into the streets and tell people about Jesus and his love for them.’

Michael & Zena Greig, The Bridges Group of Parishes, Coventry Diocese

‘I feel the Lord began to renew my heart for the lost. Having allowed the business of ‘church management’ to overtake things for many months, I found God bringing me back to the heart of the matter, which is the glorious gospel of Jesus – it was incredibly refreshing!’

Tim Grew, Trinity Cheltenham

Kids Workers Training Day May 2011 Holy Trinity Ripon ‘God was present during the day and the speakers were motivational and I left the event on wings of eagles, having arrived feeling a little fed up.’

Eraine Kozel, Bodmin Road Church, Hull

Phillip Gott, Ebenezer Baptist Church, Scarborough

NEWS

New Wine events are happening across the nation throughout the year, but WHAT difference are they making to people’s lives? Find out what God’s been up to among our church leaders and kids’ workers

Carol Wiggin, Mutley Baptist Church, Plymouth

Kids Workers Training Day May 2011 St Michael’s Southfields, London ‘Thank you so much for this wonderful event! God spoke to me a lot – ideas, inspiration and most importantly direction!

Ever since that day I’ve felt renewed and amazing things have been happening towards my career as a kids’ worker.’

Jelena Le Klere, St Paul’s Hammersmith, London

Kids Workers Training Day May 2011 Fountain of Life, Ashill, Norfolk ‘Three Sunday school teachers from our church attended this event; none of us have been to a New Wine training event before. The day was inspiring and encouraging without being condemning.

We realised how much better our children’s work could be and came away with some practical ideas of how to get going. Although we have a long way to go and lots to aspire to, we came away encouraged and equipped to start, rather than deflated and inadequate.’

Claire Taylor, Carleton Rode Baptist Church, Norwich

IN NEED OF FUEL? TOP UP SPIRITUALLY AT A FILLING STATION NEAR YOU! Wanting more? Need a credible place to bring your friends to meet God? Feel like you are alone in your area as a Spirit-filled Christian?

We can help.

THE FILLING STATION exists to

Coming to a neighbourhood near you soon!

help bring Spiritual renewal and evangelism to your area. Using informal mid-week monthly celebration meetings, we have seen many come to faith, healings occur and the Christian population of an area strengthened in their confidence and purpose. The Filling Station is not a new Church denomination, rather a group of Christians who want to help you live better.

DON’T HAVE A FILLING STATION NEAR YOU?

Contact the Filling Station Director, Rev Richard Fothergill about starting your own local meeting. We will be able to help you launch a relevant, accessible, informal meeting where people encounter God. The Filling Station currently has meetings taking place in: Somerset, Wiltshire, Hampshire and Bedforshire with more planned across the country. Find your nearest Filling Station using our website.

Contact Rev Richard Fothergill: 01225 832806 or 07835263706

thefillingstation.org.uk 7

NEWS

Family time Conference

Hosted by

Family Time products

Mark & Lindsay Melluish

Paul & Christine Perkin

Saturday 25 FEBRUARY 2012 St Paul’s, Ealing 10AM - 4Pm Only

Book online at www.new-wine.org

A conference for all who want to build family life

£20 including lunch

• Practical teaching on how to enhance your family life • Sessions on how to run both the courses • Sample sessions from the ‘Parenting Teenagers’ and the ‘Parenting Children’ courses For further information please contact us

020 8579 9370 8

info@family-time.co.uk

All Family Time books, DVDs and other resources are available to buy from New Wine Direct at www.newwinedirect.co.uk

NEWS

Kids’ Christmas Event in a Box On 27 November and 4 December 2010, thousands of children gathered together in various parts of the country (and into Europe) to take part in the Joy to the World Christmas event. One church in Berkshire gathered over 200 boys and girls from local schools for two hours of great games, wonderful activities and excellent worship. The worship, teaching and afternoon format all came from the Joy to the World CD. Paul Bristow – leader of Kidz Klub Slough and Windsor, one of the largest children’s clubs in the country – commented: ‘We used the Joy to the World songs at our Kidz Klub Christmas Special. It was the best we have done in ten years. I believe the quality of music and teaching was second to none.’

So we’re going to do it again! If you ran the event last year, you’ll be delighted to discover that the CD contains two separate teaching sessions. If you’ve never been part of this, then let us encourage you to get stuck in this year.

We want to make it possible for thousands of boys and girls throughout the nations to hear the wonderful story of Jesus and to have an opportunity to respond personally. New Wine have provided the raw materials for you to construct an extraordinary Christmas event; the rest is up to you – it’s your event!

The suggested format for the day, publicity and curriculum will all be available to download FREE from one cracking Christmas praise and worship CD; simply add your passion to see boys and girls encountering Jesus!

If you would like to be involved this Christmas, all we ask is: 1 You schedule your event for Saturday 26 November or Saturday 3 December 2011, as people will be praying for the events on those dates.

2 advertise your event on our New Wine Kids Facebook page.

You 3 You take the time afterwards to add some photos and stories to Facebook. We want to encourage others by sharing what God gets up to at your church this Christmas.

Let’s not miss this glorious opportunity to present the Jesus story to countless churched and unchurched children in the UK and beyond.

Wednesday 23 - Friday 25 November 2011 Hayes Conference Centre, Swanwick, Derbyshire COME AND BE CHALLENGED, REFRESHED, ENCOURAGED AND EQUIPPED TO LEAD KIDS OF ALL AGES INTO A DEEP AND VIBRANT RELATIONSHIP WITH THE FATHER With special guest Rob Bradbury – head of children’s ministry at Planetshakers City Church in Melbourne, Australia; National Director for KIDS R US; and leader of the international Kidshaper Conferences.

The CD

• 10 pulsating Christmas worship songs including backing tracks and lyrics • A comprehensive guide with various suggestions of how to plan and structure your day • Graphics that can be used for your publicity • 60-minute teaching curriculum including: • Christmas games • Bible texts • Bible lessons • Object lessons and illustrations • Application stories Available now for £9.99; or just £8.50 if you buy more than one!

Why not order in bulk to sell on at your church’s event? Order now from www.newwinedirect.co.uk

2010 feedback: ‘It was amazing how God spoke to me, and these words were confirmed in the leaders’ messages and conversations with other delegates - it was so encouraging. God gave me specific direction and vision at this conference, which could be life changing.’

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NEWS

Bits AND pieces A GOOD GOD STORY While we were at the New Wine Summer Conference my husband George received a miracle of healing from God. Following a triple heart bypass over 11 years ago, George has suffered from congestive heart failure and peripheral vascular disease. This has become progressively debilitating and, according to our vascular surgeon, inoperable in George’s case which meant that he was in constant pain and unable to walk or stand for any length of time.

On the Monday at New Wine George was very poorly and breathless and his walking even

more laboured and painful than before. We felt that this might be the end as the original bypass surgery was only anticipated to give George another ten years maximum to live.

On Tuesday lunchtime George slowly made his way across the showground, stopping every few yards waiting for the cramps to subside a little before he continued.

A man then asked if he could pray for him. George’s normal reaction would have been to say no, but he was so low and in so much pain that he agreed. As the man put his hand gently on George’s shoulder and prayed, George felt all the pain go and his body relax.

Since that moment there has been a transformation in his physical body.

He looks like the man he was before the original collapse. The pain lines which were etched into his face have disappeared, he is able to walk upright and the signs of circulatory

disorder including blue fingernails and ice cold lower legs and numb feet have gone.

Since our return George continues to improve day by day. We are beginning the process of working on muscles that have not been used for 11 years, coaxing them back to strength and usefulness again.

We are so grateful to the Lord for his mercy and love and know that he has not finished with George’s gifts and ministry yet as we look forward to all that he has in store for the time ahead.

Margaret Jones, St Paul’s Barton, Isle of Wight

Find the full story, and many more, under ‘Your Stories’ on our website.

Young people share their faith – and pocket money – on the streets of Norwich Kingdom Knocking, a project helping young people share their faith with strangers and engage with the homeless, is bearing fruit in Norwich. Accompanied by adult volunteers, the young people (some only 11 years old) do ‘treasure hunting’, and use surveys to initiate conversations which can lead to opportunities to pray.

They also ask any homeless people what shopping they need and often choose to pay for it with their own money.

Project leader Adam Jackson reports that adult volunteers are finding their faith stretched as well, and is delighted to see the young people putting aside their struggles with self-image to put their confidence in God: ‘Young people thrive when they are challenged with something genuinely scary for God.’ He adds, ‘We’re now getting to know homeless people by name, and we’ve seen people come to know Jesus for the first time.’

Kingdom Knocking is based at Fountain of Life church, Norwich. For more information and tips on how to get this started in your area, contact Adam Jackson at a.jackson@folchurch.co.uk

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NEWS

On behalf of Pakistan, THANK YOU! ‘This generosity of heart and mind is overwhelming and deeply humbling’, said Eddie Lyle of Open Doors when told that the offerings from this year’s New Wine Summer Conferences for Open Doors’ Operation Rainbow totalled £164,000. ‘It will make a significant impact on the marginalised and persecuted believers of Pakistan’, he added. ‘Our aim is to build a strong church in a hostile community.’

Famous faces

These picture pieces are public figures who share their first name with Old Testament characters. Who’s who?

(Answers available at www.new-wine.org/mag) 1

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ONE TO WATCH

Please keep praying; Sunday 6 November is the International Day of Prayer for the persecuted church, and there is a wide range of resources for children, youth and adults at www.opendoorsuk.org/idop The Operation Rainbow video can be downloaded from www.opendoorsuk.org/ newwine and shared with your church.

Go to YouTube and search for ‘this is discipleship’. It’s an inspiring animation that was shown by Kenny Borthwick from New Wine Scotland at this year’s Summer Conference.

The August Riots: a policeman’s perspective I was as disturbed as most will have been by the extent of the unrest witnessed on the streets of the UK this summer. As the Lord allows our nation to be shaken, I sense these events were also intended to awaken his Church to the realisation that we are not at peace, but are in a lifelong battle against evil forces at work in our communities (Eph 6.12).

As Christian police officers and staff, our prayer is that the Church will rise to this challenge by coming together as a united army. The Christian Police

Association (CPA) has a passion to build effective partnerships between the church and the police, and has received Home Office funding to develop a project called Coact, which helps churches and individuals to consider exactly how they might be able to support the police to reduce crime and build stronger communities. Find out more at www.coact.org.uk.

Inspector Roger Bartlett, Devon & Cornwall Police (CPA National Leadership Team) 11

NEWS

DID YOU KNOW?

THANK YOU

The world premiere of The Prodigals, a brand new musical based on the story from Luke’s Gospel, took place at the Gilded Balloon during this year’s Edinburgh festival. With cast including The X Factor’s Lucie Jones and Eastenders’ Aaron Sidwell, The Prodigals is said to offer high-energy

choreography, stunning songs and a roller-coaster story of modern life. One son leads a high-risk life of excess and success with his band, while the other seeks security within his father’s Scottish regiment.

English theatre and film director Sir Trevor Nunn, CBE, says: ‘The parables have endured with never diminishing meaning for centuries, because they are universal and touch on our everyday lives.

Updating stories has been a potent mechanism in the theatre ever since Shakespeare.’

For the positive feedback we’ve received regarding the article Courageous Conversation by Chris Pemberton, published in the Winter 11 edition of New Wine Magazine.

For further information on the subject please refer to Susan Scott’s excellent book, Fierce Conservations, from which some of the material was taken. We apologise that this book was not referenced in the article.

We love to hear your feedback and ideas of how we can improve the magazine, so don’t hesitate to get in touch by emailing mag@new-wine.org

GET IN TOUCH If you’ve got any stories, jokes, questions, tips or advice, please let us know:

Email us at stories@new-wine.org

Become our Facebook friend

Check out our YouTube page

Special Needs Special Ministry

nd if you’ve got a fancy phone A you can find us quicker using the QR codes on the right. You’ll need a smart phone with a QR reader app (free to download). Simply take a picture of the code and you’ll be directed to the web page, as if by magic!

Saturday 5 November 2011 Trinity Cheltenham

We believe the gospel is for everyone, and we want everyone to find a place where they can grow in faith and worship as full members of their church family.

Book online

www.new-wine.org 12

This one-day conference is for parents, carers, workers, church volunteers and leaders; for all who have a heart for children and young adults with special needs.

NEWS

Networks changing nations What impact is the New Wine Church Leaders’ Network having regionally? A representative from each of our three major networks reports on the recent developments

The New Wine Church Leaders’ Network (CLN) is for church leaders and pastors of any denomination who are in, or training for, a position of leadership.

The aim is to give members close and continuing contact with others who have the same spiritual DNA. We believe that if the imagination, dreams, energy and talents of all the local churches in New Wine could be harnessed, then together we could really contribute to changing nations.

In addition to networking leaders geographically, we provide opportunities to bring together those who share a similar working environment, ministry or life situation.

North & East by Laura McWilliams, New Wine Area Network Leader, Scarborough

London & South East by Paul Harcourt, Regional Network Leader, Woodford Wells

Leaders in the New Wine Church Leaders’ Network (CLN) are finding encouragement, support, and a safe place to receive essential personal prayer. The network leader for Durham recently wrote:

As I write we’ve just returned from another fantastic week at the New Wine Summer Conference. One frequently heard comment during the week is always, ‘If only church could be like this all the time!’ Of course, a conference will always have something special about it, as people gather with great expectation and much prayerful preparation – but why can’t church be more like that every week? We may have different resources, but we know that the Lord’s presence is promised to all who seek to welcome him.

‘The Durham core group has met twice now and is already proving to be a great place for support and refreshing...I appreciate being able to share things with people who understand the issues but are not directly involved in my situation. As a ‘one-woman band’ in a traditional Anglican church, being accountable and supported in this way will be invaluable for me.’

One of our other network leaders also wrote: ‘One of the highlights for me over the past year was going as a group to the parish of one of our members, to pray for both the church and that town. Apart from the fact that this was a great encouragement for our colleague there, who was facing a particularly tough time, it gave us all a much greater insight into that situation so that when we prayed in later meetings we could visualise so much better the particular needs of that area.’

Relationships are enriched through the networks and core groups, and although these vary according to the needs of the area, all are making a difference.

Extra events in the region such as women’s days, men’s days, leaders’ days and equipping days are all helping to resource local churches.

In Scarborough there is a New Wine prayer group linked to the CLN, in which intercessors from various churches pray for the area. As the network is organic, various other streams are developing as we link together, such as the network for women in leadership. Lives are changed and ministries are sustained through these networks; they are enabling the local church to serve Jesus and see the nation changed.

The networks exist to bring that experience into greater reality at a local level. In the London & South East region there are over 20 networks of local church leaders, meeting together for encouragement and teaching, and increasingly meeting also in smaller ‘core groups’ for more intentional mentoring and accountability. In the last year we’ve seen new networks established in Woking, Luton and Portsmouth, together with a number of networks being re-launched, including those in South Bucks and Sussex.

There is a great sense of excitement about the coming year with around 20 training days being planned, equipping local congregations to move on in prayer ministry and inviting the power of the Spirit into all we do. For many of us as leaders, belonging to a network or a core group have been essential parts of the development of our ministries and has given us the courage and confidence to lead change in the church. There’s also a great sense of being able to give as well as receive – in many networks, new initiatives in prayer, worship, evangelism and training have begun at a local level simply because churches have felt that, through New Wine, they are partners in the gospel, whatever their denominational background. There’s still a huge task before us if we are to see the nation changed, but there’s a sense that the church is stirring to life!

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NEWS

Central & South West by David Mitchell, Regional Network Leader, Bristol In New Wine’s Central & South West region, a large geographical spread and rural environment poses challenges for networking. Urban centres tend to be the hubs of networking life, where we’ve seen its significant benefits: • Prayer support and mentoring of church leaders.

In core groups and in one-to-one meetings, church leaders have been able to input into one another’s lives, support each another in challenging times, and explore good practice in ministry • Unity. The New Wine CLN has brought Anglican and non-Anglican churches and leaders together in a way that has strengthened local unity and broken down divisions between some traditional groupings • Resources for local churches. The CLN has allowed New Wine training days, conferences and speakers to go regional, and happen throughout the year, bringing encouragement and equipping to local churches

• Recognition and sharing of ministries. Through the CLN, local churches have borrowed courses from each other and shared preaching and teaching ministries • Strategic planning. The CLN has enabled conversations about, and some practical steps towards, a strategic response to the needs of a city or town, from prayer on the streets and social action projects to consultations about church planting and church resuscitation.

Finally, and perhaps less tangibly, it seems to me that across our city there’s been a cultural change. An awareness of New Wine values and practices is becoming more mainstream, bringing renewal, vigour, confidence and a missional outlook to the Church at large.

CHURCH LEADERS’ NETWORK

CLN membership is available for just £25 per year for the first year (£30 for subsequent years). There is a discounted subscription of £10 for those at college or studying for ministry.

By contributing financially to the CLN you will help to develop ways of supporting and encouraging other leaders more effectively. To find out more or to sign up to the CLN please email cln@new-wine.org or phone us on 0845 437 8656.

Rural & Village Church Leaders’ Forum

£105

Earlybird Book your place today!

31 January - 1 February 2012 Hothorpe Hall, Leicestershire

Hosted and led by experienced rural leaders, this two-day forum will feature inspiring talks

by Graham Dow, practical seminars, workshops, worship and ministry.

£105 when paid by 8 November 2011

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Feedback from 2010 forum ‘The forum was a real oasis.

It was very refreshing to go to a conference where rural issues were appreciated and addressed. I came away challenged and re-inspired in our work’

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I came not to bring peace but the swor James Mumford explores what the Bible has to say about family conflict

My favourite film of last year was The Fighter. It’s great. See it. It’s all about family mess and family conflict. Set at the beginning of the 90s in Lowell, Massachusetts, a small working class town on the East Coast of America, Micky (played by Mark Wahlberg) is an unsuccessful boxer, a ‘stepping stone’ for other, younger fighters to climb up the competition-ladder.

One of the reasons he’s stuck in a rut is because he’s completely controlled by his family, in particular his mother Alice – his life-long manager – and his brother Dicky – a drug addict, a former boxing champ himself and his coach. The pair just keep on screwing up Micky’s life and career, setting up fights (in order to get money) where he’s completely mismatched size-wise, so ends up getting pulverized every time.

Then into Micky’s life walks this woman, Charlene, who sees with fresh eyes how dysfunctional his family life is. Coming into the situation from the outside, she is able to be objective. ‘You really think your family’s looking out for you?’ she asks, persuading Micky, for the first time, to confront the dysfunctionality,

to stop indulging his mother and brother and to stand up to them.

Well, unsurprisingly, this precipitates fierce conflict in the family.

Watching The Fighter I found myself thinking about Jesus’ startling words about the reality of family conflict in the life of his followers: ‘Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.

For I have come to turn a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law – a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household’ (Matt 10:34-36).

Wow. ‘I have not come to bring harmony but disruption…’ ‘I have not come to bring ease but strife…’

‘I have not come to bring agreement but argument…’ It’s hardly a ringing endorsement of the natural form which is the family, is it? What in the world are we to make of a text like this? Does it really offer any guidance about how Christians are supposed to relate to their blood relatives? To either their immediate or extended family? Or should we just put it down to redaction – material

‘ Your mother, father, brother or sister’s view of how you live your life is no longer the most important one’ added to the original gospel texts at a later date (presumably by some fuming second-century 14 year-old who’s just been grounded)?

The paradoxes of Christianity

The first task, I think, is to recognise that this text creates one of the great paradoxes of Christianity. In an intriguing chapter of his book Orthodoxy, the great journalist and writer GK Chesterton argues that what first interested him about the Christian faith was the strange way in which it was criticised by people from diametrically opposed positions.

For example, one atheist would scold Christianity for being a very pessimistic religion, ‘a thing of inhuman gloom’ – essentially down on life. And then another would object that it was too optimistic, deriding Christianity because ‘it comforted men with a fictitious providence’.

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As these ‘double charges’ piled up, Chesterton began to find the paradoxes they pointed to as grounds for faith. Why? Because the paradoxes of faith, he felt, reflected the paradoxes of life. For in life the truth often lies in between two extremes. Again and again, right across the Bible, Chesterton detected the ‘combination between two almost insane positions which somehow amounted to sanity’. He concluded, famously, that ‘perhaps, after all, it is Christianity that is sane and all its critics that are mad’.

Another key paradox we could add to Chesterton’s list is the Bible’s view of families. Not just marriage, but families. Because if you read today’s critics, once again you find double charges. On the one hand the Church, insofar as it laments the scale of family breakdown in Western societies, is often dismissed as socially conservative, unthinkingly traditional and quaintly pro-marriage. But on the other hand a different set of critics scorn the Church for being anti-family. Here is Peter Oborne writing in The Daily Telegraph: ‘It is a curious fact that all revolutionary movements, from Christianity to the Bolsheviks, have been viscerally hostile to the family. The most troubling part of the gospels concerns Jesus’s remark that: “I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.”’

I believe the critics have hit again upon two almost insane positions which somehow amount to sanity.

For on the one hand, ‘honour your father and mother’ is the fifth commandment and again Jesus, a single person, passionately defends Genesis’ radical vision of marriage – ‘what God has joined together, let not man separate’ (Matt 19:6). Yet on the other hand Jesus issues in this text what seems like a declaration of war: ‘I did not come to bring peace but the sword.’ How do those two almost insane positions somehow amount to sanity?

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‘ We’re called to love Jesus even more than we love our families; and sometimes that love will tear us apart’ As a follower of Jesus one’s primary loyalty is no longer to one’s blood relatives: that is the profound implication of this troubling text.

That doesn’t abolish families, but it does relativise them. It doesn’t mean you automatically abandon your family, but it does mean you’re no longer determined by it. It means that now your fundamental identity lies elsewhere. It means that your mother, father, brother or sister’s view of how you live your life is no longer the most important one – and sometimes that causes trouble; it means that sometimes there is a place for rebellion. Sometimes there is a moment to sing, with Bob Dylan, ‘mothers and fathers throughout the land…don’t criticise what you can’t understand! Your sons and your daughters are beyond your command’ (Times they are a changing).

The sword that divides

Still, what does the application of this text look like? The words seem harsh. The cost seems high. What might the reality look like? Let me draw out two points: first, that the sword which Jesus yields is one which divides; and secondly, that it is one which liberates.

As always, context is illuminating.

Jesus’ extraordinary words come in the heart of Matthew’s famous ‘missions discourse’. Jesus is in the middle of trying to sketch out for his disciples what it will mean to follow him, and part of this involves managing expectations. So as well as envisioning them with the best-case scenario – ‘Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse those who have leprosy, drive out demons’ (Matt 10:8) – Jesus also helps the disciples to make friends with the worst-case scenario. As they go out into the world and preach the message that the kingdom of God

is near, it’s just a fact that they are going to encounter hostility. They can expect to be arrested, hauled up before governors and kings.

Finally, Jesus moves from anticipating the political fall-out of mission to the family fall-out.

Following him will inevitably, on occasions, result in family conflict.

This doesn’t mean his disciples are proactively to precipitate that conflict. We’re not called, upon conversion, to pick up the phone and promptly announce to our parents that we’re no longer in relationship! Indeed, Paul explicitly tells husbands and wives who have come to faith not to divorce their startled spouses (1 Cor 7:12-14).

And elsewhere in the gospels, turning to Jesus leads people to repair situations – ‘If I have cheated anybody out of anything,’ Zacchaeus declares, ‘I will pay back four times the amount!’ (Luke 19:8).

Yet sometimes, and only sometimes, following Jesus brings not peace, but the sword.

I have a friend called Charlotte in whose family infidelity runs deep.

Her father was a serial adulterer.

Then, when her brother grew up history repeated itself. It was a bizarre situation: Charlotte’s brother and his wife bought a house and rented out the top floor to a single woman. The brother then started having an affair with her, scurrying upstairs in the middle of the night. After a few months, though, he eventually got bored with his mistress and returned – for one night only – to his highly forgiving wife. That night they conceived. The wife’s reaction?

‘Maybe this, finally, is what will keep our marriage together.’ Yet the joyous news elicited a tragic response. The brother issued his wife with an ultimatum: ‘It’s me or the baby.’ She chose the latter, whereupon the brother duly left his wife for good and scurried back upstairs.

They tried to resist the narrowing of the options. Why couldn’t they continue in relationship with both parties, even if they are separated?

But that is exactly the reasonable option the brother was taking off the table. So they were forced to choose sides; and they felt the Lord compel them to side with the wife and her unborn child. True to his word, Charlotte hasn’t seen or heard from the brother since. Two years ago he wasn’t even at her wedding. ‘A man’s enemies will be members of his own household.’

Charlotte’s story provides a clear picture of the unfortunate, un-sought-out conflict which is sometimes the cost of following Jesus. We’re called to love Jesus even more than we love our families; and sometimes that love will tear us apart.

Seen in this light, Jesus’ shocking projections in fact constitute an injection of realism. His craziness, in other words, is credible. For his teaching really is for this world, not for a rosy

one where everything always works out in the way we would want it to.

It is the same realism expressed in Paul’s counsel to the Romans. For when he writes, ‘If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone’ (Rom. 12:18), he is allowing for the possibility that there are times when it doesn’t.

to sever the ties that bind, to break the unfortunate aspects of inheritance, to crush the strong genetic components of certain habits, to bring hope. For where the Spirit of the Lord is – even if it depends upon the sword to deliver it – there is freedom!

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But the brother didn’t only issue his wife with that ultimatum. When Charlotte and the mother rallied round her pregnant sister-in-law they were also told by her brother, ‘It’s me or the baby.’

The sword that liberates

However, among the sobering import of Jesus’ teaching there is also a more hopeful message as well. The sword which divides is also the sword which liberates.

For if your family is no longer the determining factor – the absolute condition – of your life, then the possibility of freedom looms large; freedom from the patterns built up over generations, whether it from an addiction or perfectionism or denial. Jesus of Nazareth came to bring the sword

James Mumford James works at The Centre for Social Justice, an independent think tank in Westminster focussed on solutions to poverty in the UK. He recently finished his PhD from Oxford in ethics and theology. He is married to Holly and is passionate about her, the Church, the Coen Brothers, and football.

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Is Africa cursed with riches? Or could the natural resources prevalent in the continent become a blessing? Andy Wilson from Tearfund helps us to Unearth the truth

Many struggling nations across the world are paradoxically rich in natural resources such as oil and minerals – wealth that has the potential to transform the lives of some of their poorest citizens.

Unfortunately, these resources often have the opposite effect, exacerbating poverty.

There are many examples where African nations have discovered rich natural wealth, but instead of this providing prosperity, it has led to economic instability, conflict and environmental devastation. It’s become so commonplace that the phenomenon has been named the ‘resource curse’.

But we know that God has richly blessed the earth with good things to provide for all our needs; the ‘good and perfect gifts’ that we read about in James 1:17. But we also know from John 10:10 that contrary forces are at work, ‘the thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy’.

At Tearfund we believe it’s time to redeem the natural wealth that belongs to countries blighted by poverty, disease and conflict – so that these God-given resources become a blessing not a curse.

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Recovering the blessing

Our call to end this injustice has resonated with local churches, Christian organisations and church leaders that we partner with across the world. Pastor Edgar James Momoh, for example, is passionate about giving poor people back the benefits of their own natural resources.

Edgar is Church Empowerment and Advocacy Manager at the Evangelical Fellowship of Sierra Leone, and also serves as Associate Pastor in Christians in Action Church. He has seen firsthand the devastating effects of the unfair exploitation of natural resources in his country. Until 2002, Sierra Leone was in the grip of a bloody civil war that lasted 11 years and left more than 50,000 people dead.

One of the main triggers for the conflict was the prevalence and accessibility of diamonds. The eastern and southern districts of Sierra Leone are rich in alluvial (loose) diamonds – so that practically anyone with a few small tools, a pick and a sieve can mine these immensely valuable gems. A recipe for prosperity, you’d expect.

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aimed to overthrow the corrupt government. The oppressed ordinary citizens of Sierra Leone felt sympathetic to the RUF’s cause and many joined the militia – ironically, the rebels used funds harvested from the alluvial diamond mines to purchase weapons and ammunition from neighbouring countries.

More than a decade of death and conflict ensued, primarily because the government colluded with mining companies to deny the fair distribution of natural wealth – riches that belonged to the whole country and its people.

‘ It’s time to redeem the natural wealth that belongs to countries blighted by poverty, disease and conflict’ But unfair exploitation from mining companies – enabled by a corrupt government – meant that by the late 1980s almost all the diamonds were smuggled and traded illicitly. And the huge revenues did not go to the struggling people of Sierra Leone, it went to private investors instead.

Made poor by riches

Government corruption was so rife that by 1991, Sierra Leone was ranked as one of the poorest countries in the world. This was despite the fact that it benefited from a myriad of natural resources – not just diamonds, but gold, bauxite, rutile, iron ore, fish, coffee and cocoa.

This huge inequality understandably frustrated poor and struggling people, leading to the establishment of the Revolutionary United Front (RUF) – a rebel group which

But this is not something that happened in the past, nor is it confined to Sierra Leone. It’s happening right now across the developing world. In 2008, exports of oil, gas and minerals from Africa were worth roughly nine-times the value of international aid to the continent – that’s $393 billion in exports compared to $44 billion in aid.

Corruption and lack of integrity costs the African continent an estimated £3,000 per second – more than enough money to pay for every child to go to primary school and every single person to have safe drinking water.

Despite the civil war ending, the people of Sierra Leone are still not profiting from their country’s riches. ‘What bothers me is the fact that the government does not deal with citizens with transparency’, says Pastor Edgar. ‘We have all the resources one can think of, but we as citizens do not know how they are used or managed.

‘I am also worried that Sierra Leoneans are not benefitting from all that we have. On record, Sierra Leone has about 28 mineral resources – many of them not yet exploited. We have such a small population – about six million people. Why can’t we enjoy these resources?’

Bringing truth to light

I expect reading this, like Pastor Edgar, you feel frustrated. It seems so obvious that these devastating corrupt practices should be stamped out. If people knew what was going on it would not be tolerated. In John 3:21 we are given a promise from Jesus: ‘But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God.’ There’s a traditional American spiritual song, Run on for a long time, that neatly sums up this verse: ‘What’s down in the dark will be brought to the light.’ These murky underground and underhand practices should be revealed, brought to the surface for all to see. Jesus called on his followers, the Church, to be the light of the world – a title he also called himself.

That’s why, at Tearfund, we’re listening to the voices of people like Pastor Edgar and joining with him in his fight for justice, as Jesus called us to do. And we ask you and your church to stand with us.

‘I see Christians and churches playing a vital role calling governments and businesses to account’, says Pastor Edgar. ‘There is a lot of respect for religious leaders in Sierra Leone. If we lend our voices to demands based on evidence, the government will be compelled to listen to us.’

Tearfund recently launched Unearth the Truth, a campaign that aims to challenge these corrupt practices, and bring redemption and healing to people in poverty. Later in John’s Gospel, Jesus tells us that the truth sets us free ( John 8:32).

With your help, we can unearth that truth by getting oil, mining and gas companies to publish what they pay to all governments.

This revelation will enable citizens to hold their governments to account and offers the potential to unlock billions of pounds – money

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that already exists but is denied to people who rightfully deserve it.

It’s a simple act that will lift people out of poverty and protect the environment they depend on.

This is an opportune time to raise this issue and have our voices heard. The UK government has taken a lead in the fight against poverty by committing to ring-fence spending on international aid.

The coalition has a target to spend 0.7 per cent of gross national income on development by 2013. The UK can also help in another important way by ensuring that the wealth generated by natural resources in developing countries is used to benefit all the citizens of those countries.

Mobilising God’s people

With your help, we want to ask the UK government to champion country-by-country and project-byproject reporting requirements for oil, gas and mining companies registered on stock exchanges across Europe.

Right now there is a great opportunity to see this happen. In the coming weeks the EU will begin debating whether to introduce new transparency laws. This could significantly increase the amount of information available to poorer communities about the profits their government make from natural resources.

The Prime Minister David Cameron has already given his support, emphasising that ‘mineral wealth should be a blessing, not a curse’.

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‘ Corruption and lack of integrity costs the African continent an estimated £3,000 per second’ However, some countries within the EU and some large extractive companies are reluctant to make this information available. In particular, ministers from Germany and the Netherlands, and companies such as Shell, are currently unwilling to support any new rules. In order to ensure the world’s poorest are able to benefit from the wealth beneath their feet we need them to change their minds.

Not only is this a favourable time politically, we’re convinced that we’ve caught a movement that’s already happening in the Church.

And it’s not just from pastors like Edgar, it’s happening here in the UK too. When we launched Unearth the Truth at New Wine’s 2011 Summer Conference, there was an overwhelming response, and more than 8,000 of you responded to John Coles’s call to action.

We’re thankful that so many of you are onboard – please keep following and supporting this vital campaign.

Make a stand for justice

We’re still looking for more people to stand up for justice and shine a light in the darkness. Please help us to unearth the truth on corruption.

By getting oil, mining and gas companies to publish what they pay to all governments we can help people hold their governments to account and potentially unlock billions of pounds to tackle poverty.

But we need your voice, your prayers and your support.

And things can change. ‘I think now is time of blessing’, says Pastor Edgar. ‘God has destined for Sierra Leone to move forward. Our president believes that my country will be a donor nation soon. Now is the time for companies to shine a light on what they pay. I urge you to support Unearth the Truth.’

For more details about how you and your church can get behind Tearfund’s Unearth the Truth campaign, visit www.tearfund.org/unearth or call 0845 355 8355. What’s down in the dark will be brought to the light.

Andy Wilson Andy is Tearfund’s governance and corruption campaigns officer, responsible for the Unearth the Truth campaign.

He attends St Peter’s Battersea on the Winstanley Estate in central London.

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IS GOD HOMICIDAL? CAN WE WORSHIP THE SAME GOD WHO COMMANDED GENOCIDE IN CANAAN? IN THIS THIRD AND FINAL ARTICLE ON VIOLENCE IN THE OLD TESTAMENT, SIMON COUPLAND CALLS FOR RADICAL HOLINESS AND ARGUES THAT JESUS CHANGES EVERYTHING

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n this series of articles we have been looking at the difficult question of what Christians are to make of the violence in the Old Testament.

In the two previous articles (Is God Homicidal? in New Wine Magazine Winter 11 and Holy Violence? in New Wine Magazine Summer 11; both available online at new-wine.org/mag) we examined three simplistic solutions which turned out not to be solutions at all. They were: to ignore the Old Testament, either explicitly or implicitly; to explain away the violence by arguing that it didn’t really happen; or to see it not as a ‘problem’ but as God’s way of dealing with sinners, which, I suggested, overlooks the teaching and practice of Jesus.

Recalling helpful approach 1

While recognising that there is no simple solution to the issue, we then looked at one possible way of making Old Testament violence more comprehensible, namely by seeing it as typical for the period in which it took place, and judging it by the standards of the time rather than those of our day. What we perceive as inexcusable was normal practice for the era, and we saw that, in many respects, Israel’s actions were less cruel and vindictive than those of the nations round about.

In this final article we will look at two other approaches which may similarly help us to retain these passages as Scripture without commending the Israelites’ actions as a model for us to follow today.

HELPFUL APPROACH 2: REMEMBER WHY GOD COMMANDED THIS

The reason why God wanted the Canaanites destroyed was the utterly detestable nature of their religion in his eyes. It involved cult prostitution, the worship of idols, and human sacrifice: ‘They even burn their sons and daughters in the fire as sacrifices to their gods’ (Deut 12:31). In Leviticus 18:24-27 God declares that these abominable practices have resulted in not only individuals having become defiled, but the whole people and even the land itself, which as a result has ‘vomited out its inhabitants’. God’s judgement was thus not only an act of condemnation and punishment for wickedness and evil, but also a purification, for the sake of holiness.

God also knew that if the Israelites occupied the land while the Canaanites were still living and worshipping there, they would in time be tempted to worship their gods and copy their behaviour. In Deuteronomy 12:29-31, for instance, God warns, ‘When you have driven them out and settled in their land, and after they have been destroyed before you, be careful not to be ensnared by inquiring about their gods, saying,

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“How do these nations serve their gods? We will do the same.”’ Lest we think that this was an unjustified concern, the evidence of the Bible and archaeology is that, again and again, that is precisely what the people of Israel did.

Evidence of a broken covenant

One command in the Law that always used to puzzle me was, ‘Do not cook a young goat in its mother’s milk’ (Ex 23:19, Ex 34:26 and Deut 14:21). My small group leader once tried to explain this as showing kindness to the kid, but I was unconvinced: the animal was dead, it really didn’t mind what milk it was cooked in! But an ancient Ugaritic text suggests that this was most likely Canaanite magic, creating a fertility potion, and the fact that the Torah repeated the prohibition three times suggests that there were Israelites who thought it worth trying.

Archaeological discoveries demonstrate that many Israelites tried to enhance their fertility in ways that God had prohibited. Excavations in their houses have uncovered literally thousands of clay statuettes representing a well-endowed female displaying her breasts. Archaeologists believe that they represent the goddess Asherah, and although none of the statues bears an inscription, it’s pretty obvious that these are some kind of fertility charms. Asherah worship was forbidden in Israel, but the existence of these figurines suggests that a lot of people practised it at home.

This is why God wanted to keep his people from living among tribes who worshipped other gods; he knew what they were like. King Solomon is a prime example: ‘As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the Lord his God, as the heart of David his father had been. He followed Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians, and Molech the detestable god of the Ammonites’ (1 Kings 11:4-5).

Radical holiness

God calls for radical holiness, a word which comes from the Latin radix, meaning a root. When Heather and I were first married our garden was full of ground elder. The only way to get rid of it was to keep digging out the roots, again and again. And in the end we succeeded! If we are to live holy lives we need to get rid of the causes of sin – by the roots. To use a different example, if we undergo a cancer operation, we want to know that the surgeon has removed all the cancerous cells, not just some. God calls us to radical holiness, and that means radical action.

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Know your enemy

‘ Our conflict is not with swords, guns or bombs, but with prayer, proclamation, and practical action in the name of, and with the heart of, Jesus’ If we still find this difficult, it is important to bear in mind that the same rule applied to the Israelites.

In Leviticus 18, which we quoted earlier, the Lord continues: ‘And if you defile the land, it will vomit you out as it vomited out the nations that were before you’ (v. 28). There was one rule for all, Canaanite and Israelite alike. And so when Israel ignored or rejected God and turned to idols instead, the prophets warned that they would face the same fate that the nations before them had suffered: ‘I will send destroyers against you, each man with his weapons, and they will cut up your fine cedar beams and throw them into the fire. People from many nations will pass by this city and will ask one another, “Why has the Lord done such a thing to this great city?” And the answer will be: “Because they have forsaken the covenant of the Lord their God and have worshipped and served other gods”’ ( Jer 22:8-10).

To me this represents a significant challenge, raising the question: how seriously do I take holiness? The Canaanites were condemned and destroyed because of their rejection of God’s holiness and their love of what was evil. Later Israel suffered the same fate because of their idolatry. Jesus challenges us as he challenged his disciples, ‘For I tell you that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the Pharisees and the teachers of the Law, you will certainly not enter the Kingdom of Heaven’ (Matt 5:20). God is perfectly pure and completely holy; we cannot come into his presence with unclean hands. How seriously do we take that?

HELPFUL APPROACH 3: JESUS CHANGES EVERYTHING

This does not mean that I am suggesting that we should imitate the Israelites and try to destroy the godless society around us, let alone kill those who reject God and flout his standards. Because the most important factor to bear in mind when we tackle this question of the violence in the Old Testament is this: we are followers of Jesus who live under the new covenant, even if the Hebrew Scriptures are still part of our Bible.

New Testament scholar PWL Walker writes, ‘Within Christian theology it is illegitimate to approach the Old Testament text as though the New Testament had not been written’ (Jesus and the Holy City, p.313).

This means that for followers of Jesus, the ‘land’ which is our inheritance is not a geographical entity, but the kingdom of God. Hebrews 11:9-10 says: ‘Abraham made his home in the promised land like a stranger in a foreign country…For he was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God.’ What this quite astonishing statement declares is that the promised land is not the ‘Holy Land’, and it wasn’t even for Abraham. If the Crusaders had grasped this biblical truth, they would never have set out on their misguided mission. If we understand it, we will never be tempted to imitate the tribes who conquered Canaan, even if we accept that they did so at God’s command. That was then, under a very different covenant; this is now.

It means, too, that the enemy is now Satan, and our battle will not take the form of physical violence against Canaanites or any other races, nations or religions, but spiritual warfare. As Paul writes, ‘Our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms’ (Eph 6:12). Our conflict is not with swords, guns or bombs, but with prayer, proclamation, and practical action in the name of, and with the heart of, Jesus.

To sum up, we should not be ashamed of these Old Testament passages and ignore them, but see them in the context of their time and their place in Scripture.

They also challenge us to lead more radically holy lives and to battle for the kingdom of God, not with violence but with the Word and Spirit of God. For further reading Simon recommends Stanley Gundry (ed.): Four Views on God and Canaanite Genocide: Show Them No Mercy (Zondervan 2003).

For your chance to win a free copy of this book, simply email the title to mag@new-wine.org before 30 November 2011 (one entry per person). © The author retains full copyright of this material; it may not be republished.

Simon Coupland Simon leads St Paul’s Kingston Hill and a local New Wine network, together with his wife Heather. He’s currently writing a book about Burning Issues that Preachers Prefer not to Touch, of which this is one.

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R O F UT

O SUFF A SHOU T

ERIN

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n my travels I often minister in places where people’s expectations of God’s intervention to bring healing or any kind of transformation are low. This is usually because they’ve suffered big disappointments: praying for friends and family who haven’t been healed but remain ill or in pain, or have died and not been resurrected.

Devastating disappointment

Disappointment naturally leads people to accommodate to the status quo. We too often adjust our theology and practice to make room for prayers not being answered. On a recent trip to England, my wife Gracie and I ministered in a church that had been through some major trials and big losses, including the death of their beloved pastor from cancer five years before.

I was speaking on Acts 6-8 – one of my favorite sections of Scripture these days – and was struck in a whole new way by the realism and idealism in this story. Acts 6 begins with the apostles’ selection of seven people ‘of good reputation, full of the Spirit and of wisdom’ to serve widows at an early church version of a soup kitchen. The apostles feel called to prayer and ministry of the Word, and lay hands on these seven to serve in keeping with Jesus’ way of indiscriminate love.

I continue to be amazed to read how the first of the seven, Stephen, is consequently ‘full of grace and power, performing great wonders and signs among the people’ (v 8). Then right away in Acts 7 he preaches a mega-sermon that enrages his audience to such an extent that they stone him to death, and widespread persecution of Jesus’ followers results.

It was such a big blow to these first Christians, who’d already been through so many devastating disappointments. Jesus’ betrayal by one of their own and his arrest and execution were fresh in their memories. His resurrection certainly brought radical hope, but Jesus then left them in his ascension.

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Bob Ekblad explores the importance of loud lamentation in our longing for breakthrough ‘ We too often adjust our theology and practice to make room for prayers not being answered’ Taking suffering seriously

Gathering and waiting was not in vain. The Holy Spirit was poured out at Pentecost, and frightened, timid apostles were transformed overnight into bold witnesses. But persecution followed swiftly: arrests, threats, beatings, orders to not speak in Jesus’ name again. Acts 5 ends with the apostles going away from their flogging ‘rejoicing that they had been considered worthy to suffer shame for his name’ (v 41).

The apostles’ laying on of hands leads to empowerment for healing and preaching, which leads once again to martyrdom and unprecedented persecution that scatters the remaining six table servers throughout Judea and Samaria, leading to house-to-house searches, arrests and imprisonment (8:1-3). As I was preaching, a verse I have mostly overlooked struck me as critical for my English audience: ‘Some devout people buried Stephen, and made loud lamentation over him’ (8:2).

Loud lamentation over Stephen shows how seriously these early Christians took their disappointment and pain. Lamentation, the public and private expressions of grief and disillusionment, is essential.

I wondered whether this community needed to give louder voice to pain, to complaint, risking the loss of faith to receive faith anew.

At the end of the service I invited people suffering from deep disappointment and despondency to come forward for prayer. I was surprised by how many responded, some of them weeping. As Gracie and I began to pray the Holy Spirit came powerfully and people were being visibly touched. People were comforting and praying for each other and the love

‘ I am finding my expectations for his saving touch increasing together with an intense longing for God’s realm to come here and now’ of God was so tangible and deeply moving. The presence of God was so strong that many people were not able to remain standing.

TEACHING

It’s important to note that lamentation is not a technique that guarantees immediate breakthrough.

After loudly lamenting Stephen’s death, things don’t get immediately better. Saul does house-to-house searches and drags people off to prison (8:3). But in the next story, Philip, the second person ordained to care for widows, flees to Samaria where crowds hear his preaching and see miraculous signs.

‘For in the case of many who had unclean spirits, they were coming out of them shouting with a loud voice; and many who had been paralysed and lame were healed. So there was much rejoicing in that city’ (Acts 8:7-8).

After a while Gracie and I both received some words of knowledge for healing and we invited people with various conditions to come for prayer. Person after person was being healed as we had people praying for each other and Gracie and I ministered to many.

Persecution leads to scattering, which brings God’s strong presence to the excluded Samaritans and soon to the African continent through Philip’s next encounter (8:25). Philip’s dramatic faith adventure continues as the Spirit transports him to his next assignment, inviting us into ours.

Expectancy and empowering

I’ve been recalling many examples in the gospels where people who come to Jesus expressing their grief or honest assessment of their lack of relief are met with Jesus’ apt response. I feel inspired anew to bring my uncensored laments, complaints and needs before Jesus, and am finding my expectations for his saving touch increasing together with an intense longing for God’s realm to come here and now.

Bob Ekblad Bob is Executive Director of the Tierra Nueva ministry and the People’s Seminary in Washington, USA. He’s on the faculty of the New Wine Training Partnership, which aims to train disciples, leaders, evangelists and church planters in Kingdom ministry. Find out more at www.nwtp.org.uk

NEW WINE TRAINING PARTNERSHIP

SCHOOL OF LEADERSHIP & MISSION

a three-year degree programme (FdA in Leadership, Ministry and Mission)

get equipped

for leadership and mission

get empowered

through worship, prayer and theological study

get experienced

through an internship in the church or business

www.nwtp.org.uk/slam 25

STORIES

What happened when over 30,000 people got together on showgrounds in Newark and Shepton Mallet in July and August this year? Here’s just a handful of the hundreds of summer stories we’ve received ‘ I was a cannabis and solvent (and other drugs) addict. The Lord God has set me free from all my addictions, calmed me down and he has also broken my heart and given me a tongue in another language. God, Jesus, the Spirit, they rule.’

(From Club One & Thirst, Youth venues)

‘ God revealed to us an area of our relationship where forgiveness was desperately needed. Through the Bible studies and seminars God brought about this forgiveness and healing. As a couple we have never felt closer to one another and to the Lord. I also experienced healing for an ongoing back problem.’

Anon

‘ I got a vision of God putting all my worry into a jar and smashing it onto the ground; I just really felt him with me.

New Wine has changed my life, I really love it – please don’t ever stop running it. I became a Christian there and have been going for 11 years, it’s so good to meet up with friends – it’s better than going abroad. New Wine is amazing.’

Phoebe Mills, St Steven’s Tonbridge

‘Our six year-old moved on so much in his passion for Jesus and worship. Last year his ears were healed from repeated ear infections and perforated ear drums and has had no problems since then.’

Julian & Sue Horspole, Billericay Baptist Church

‘ I came to be ministered to by God. I was, and then found myself ministering to others. I was healed of self doubt and encouraged to allow his Spirit to work with and within me. He gave me what I asked for and unexpected extras.’

Paul Walker, NLBC Northallerton

‘ While receiving prayer ministry I was so aware of the Spirit’s presence. The person who prayed with me was obviously listening to what God was saying because she prayed and spoke exactly what was needed. It had been a very difficult year but I came away from that time of prayer feeling so encouraged and equipped for returning to the challenges.’

Helen Jary, Cloverfield Church, Thetford

‘ I decided to go forward for prayer at every opportunity rather than waiting until later in the week and that attitude of pressing in resulted in some very powerful encounters with God, and encouragement in ministry. Probably the best New Wine summer conference experience I’ve had for many years.

Thanks!’

Rev David Chamberlin, All Saints Milton

‘ God met with me from the moment we arrived! To see what he did in the lives of some of our church was awesome, especially those in addiction recovery.’

Julian Thompson, Bournemouth Vineyard

‘ The highlight was the worship in Venue One with so many people; it was awesome and truly spiritually uplifting. I was working in Site Crew and it was so encouraging to be with a team with God as your focus. The work was enjoyable no matter how arduous.’

Jonathan Birdsall, Living Waters Church, Clevedon

‘ My highlight was looking after my group of children in Gems and seeing them progress through the week: crying at the beginning because they had never left their parents before and crying at the end of the week because they didn’t want to leave the Gems venue!’

Jenny Herrod, St Luke’s Church, Sway

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STORIES ‘ As part of the prayer ministry team in Venue One, it was a privilege to watch God meeting with individual people.

At home very few people come for ministry but at New Wine it’s considered the norm. God met with me through praying with others.’

Paul Brayshaw, St Paul’s Church, Canford Heath, Poole

his week I’ve made a real connection with God. When I T was filled with the Holy Spirit I realised the extent of what he’s done for me and what he’s given me; I really started to appreciate the friend he is. It was just an incredible experience being touched by the Holy Spirit and I feel I’ve really grown in Christ.’

(From Club One & Thirst, Youth venues)

‘ Jack came to Our Place for the first time and settled well.

His mum didn’t want to leave him but we persuaded her to go and he was fine. She said he’d taken all year to talk to his reception teachers but in two hours he was happily chatting to our team members. His mum said, ‘He must be really happy and relaxed here.’’

(From Our Place, Special Needs venue)

‘ We have been coming to New Wine for the last nine years and when our younger two sons got baptised recently we were struck by how central New Wine has been in helping them on their journey of faith. Our eldest son was on team this year for the fourth year, and our middle son was on team for the first time. New Wine has become the highlight of our summer, and other family holidays have to fit round it. We have seen our sons (and their friends) grow in passion and assured in their faith through successive years. Thank you for faithfully providing the support and space for our family to grow.’

Andy & Helen Riggs, Wooten-under-Edge, Gloucestershire

‘ James’s granddad said how great it was for the whole family to be able to come away together to a place where the provision for James is so good, and to a place where James is encouraged, safe and happy.’

(From Our Place, Special Needs venue)

‘ I always used to be a Christian. I am the daughter of two clergy and know a lot about God in theory. I have heard a lot of theological debates but have always been a very halfhearted Christian. This week I gave my life to Jesus, it was amazing. I fell to my knees, just filled with the Holy Spirit. I saw the feet of Jesus. It was almost as if I had never seen the full picture or known the person but this week I looked up and saw his face. I am totally changed!’

that her hearing was great and that she didn’t need the operation, which had been scheduled for two weeks after New Wine. God you are awesome, thank you for this amazing healing!’

Nicky Soars, Pevensey, East Sussex

‘ I prayed for a woman who told me that I’d really helped – now I want to pray and teach people about Jesus when I’m older’ Amber (From Boulder Gang, Kids’ venue)

‘ We have been to New Wine for many years whilst crying out to God for a family. Four years ago we came just after having IVF, which failed. Three years ago we came totally broken as all treatments had failed.

Last year we came for the day with our new family of three adopted siblings and our four year-old asked Jesus to be his friend. They loved it so much we booked for this year as soon as we could! We had a lovely week and the adoption became final today as a judge makes the official stamp on something we knew already. God is good!’ Textimony ‘ My family and I attended New Wine N&E this year and had a great week. We have four kids so juggling groups and worship time at the Impact venue was a bit tough for us but we tried to go as much as possible. All week I did my usual thing of waiting for a specific word for me in the call up to prayer, but I didn’t feel that it came so I decided on the last night I would just go up anyway. A gentleman prayed a simple prayer that I would be re-focused fully towards God and his purpose for me. I felt a great peace come over me while I stood there, so I just sat down in the presence of God, it was awesome!

A friend then prayed with me about my work and its influences, and as soon as we started praying I heard these words going round in my head: ‘Make the work of your hands, my hands’. To hear God speak these words was really powerful.’

Adam Lacey, Aston, Birmingham

(From Club One & Thirst, Youth venues)

‘ Our daughter Olivia (aged 4) was offered prayer one morning and the children and team prayed for her hearing. She has trouble with glue ear and had already had both ears operated on. During dinner that evening she announced, ‘Oh I forgot to tell you, my ears have been healed, they prayed for me in Pebbles!’ We immediately started testing her hearing asking her to walk further and further away as we whispered words and phrases. She could hear everything – it was amazing! We visited the doctor and he agreed

27

STORIES

ay…

Have your s

‘ I need a wheel chair at New Wine and walk with a crutch because I have MS. Often I have been at church events where I have gone up for ministry and have had to wait a long time as people have avoided praying for somebody in a wheelchair. But not last night; you guys [referring to Boulder Gang children] came one after another to pray over me. I met powerfully with God’s spirit and he was using you to bring blessing and healing. The pain which I have got used to just left my neck and shoulders and I was filled with warmth and peace. It was amazing.’

Anon

‘ In the middle of June I was taken ill and a scan and further tests revealed I had a large, six-centimetre benign tumour in my ovary that needed to be removed. We were warned that it may end in a major operation with the removal of my ovary.

At New Wine I grabbed any opportunity for prayer, and one day after prayer I had a lot of pain, but woke up the next day with hardly any pain! I had my operation this week and they couldn’t find the tumour – it had completely disappeared!

They only found a very small cyst on my other ovary which was the cause of the remaining pain which they drained! I am so grateful to God for his healing and that I only had a minor operation as with four small children and my husband away a lot with the army it would have all been too much and he knew that! Thank you again for all you do for these Summer Conferences, they touch the lives of so many and bless so many!’

Jo Robson, Kingsland Church, Colchester

‘ I prayed for a man who when he was a student at school he could play the guitar and then the bones and nerves in his wrist went wrong, he could not play guitar, he was devastated. He wanted prayer to be able to play the guitar again. So I prayed for him, he started to shake and cry and said you have helped God help me through physical pain.’

Emma (From Boulder Gang, Kids’ venue)

‘ Henry has progressed a great deal since last summer’s conference. He is talking now using more words at a time and is less frustrated. He is giving more eye contact and is starting to greet people properly!’

(From Our Place, Special Needs venue)

‘ I became a Christian this week and felt like a weight had been lifted and I was free. Now I feel more open about my faith and more competent with praying. All in all I feel amazing because of God freeing me from my sin.’

(From Club One & Thirst, Youth venues)

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‘ For some time now I have struggled with a low self-esteem and for a few years this has affected my eating. The last few months, especially during exams, my eating became even more severe and I began to constantly monitor my weight and controlled my eating even more, causing me to lose quite a bit of weight. This week I have really put this problem in God’s hands and although I believe it is still something I need to deal with, I have accepted it is wrong to harm my body in this way and know it is not necessary.’

(From Club One & Thirst, Youth venues)

‘ At Pebbles 2010, a mum had prayer at the praise party for post-natal depression, which she had been suffering from for over six years. The same mum had her child in Pebbles again this year and told us that since the prayer last year, her life has drastically changed – the family are full of joy!’

(From Pebbles, Kids’ venue)

‘ Philip is 18 and his mum has never left him. She brought him to Our Place on Wednesday morning and left him with us!

He really enjoyed the games and the teaching and was really relaxed. He came back in the afternoon and joined in with the teaching while his mum and her boyfriend could relax in the family time. To leave him was such a breakthrough for his mum because of his complex medical needs.’

(From Our Place, Special Needs venue)

STORIES

New Wine around the w Vargön & Vänersborg, SWEDEN 29 June – 1 July 2011 700 people Main speaker: Kjell-Axel Johanson (Leader of New Wine Sweden)

‘ Our summer conference tended to have a modest turnout of 200-300 delegates, and we were beginning to wonder if it was worth organising. Then in 2010 500 people booked in, and this year numbers rose to 700. God was there from the first worship song. When people come hungry and expectant, things happen; it was so easy to pray for people. Thirtyfour people received Jesus for the first time, and 23 were healed. One woman says that tests appear to show that her breast cancer is gone; another man was instantly healed of tinnitus in both ears which he’d had since 1994. But God’s work did not stop at the conference – one pastor from Falun, Magnus Davidsson, reported that his youth group has begun ministering at church with their brand new spiritual gifts!

Daniel Norburg, Leader of New Wine Sweden

Himos, FINLAND 6-10 July 2011 1600 people Main speaker: Miles Toulmin (Holy Trinity Brompton, London, UK)

‘ In the youth event we experienced God’s goodness in many ways. Healings included a teenage sprinter with a hamstring sprain that had not been able to train for several weeks. She was prayed for, and the next day was able to do a four-hour training session! Another girl was healed from a hormone disorder affecting her menstrual cycle. There were also boys and girls who gave their life to Jesus for the first time. Another girl shared about her inner healing and deliverance, and being set free from timidity and a feeling of isolation. She experienced God’s love during worship instead of anxiety and emotional coldness. Another said that she used to dislike the way she looked, but after being prayed for the next morning she looked in the mirror and actually saw herself beautiful.’

Suvi Kankkunen

‘ A lady shared her testimony about how she was healed after last year’s Summer Conference. She had been suffering from serious depression for over 11 years, for which she had tried several different treatments including psychotherapy. She was at the point of thinking it would be better for others if she were dead. But God renewed her faith; she learned to be thankful and rejoice, and found a New Wine fellowship to join.

Another lady was healed of nerve pain in the ball of her foot that she had suffered with for over a year, and which required an operation. The pain was gone after the prayer ministry.’

Markku Sarento

rld

CLAN, St Andrews, SCOTLAND 23-29 July 2011 2700 people Main speaker: Jack Deere (Wellspring Church, Texas, USA)

‘ I received prayer for head and neck pain and God came in power and took away the pain and enveloped me in his warmth, love and restored my joy with a release of laughter.’ ‘ God has healed me of over 15 years of resentment. He’s releasing me into something new and I’m so excited to be part of it and trust him in this new adventure.’ ‘ I received ministry for pain in hips and knees. I have been able to stop my medication.’ ‘ God has showered me with his affection this week and brought release from a sense of shame about relationships in the past. He has spoken to me each day. God is wonderful.’

NEW WINE EUROPE, St-Joris-Weert, Belgium 8-12 August 2011 350 people Main speaker: Rich Johnson (All Saints’ Worcester, UK) ‘ I was diagnosed as having a herniated disc in my neck a couple of years ago and have been suffering from pain on and off since the diagnosis. However, it hasn’t been the pain that’s been the most annoying. Every time I moved my head there was a constant grating noise, like a ratchet or badly adjusted gears on a bike! I could hear it all of the time...day and night. At the conference I responded to prayer and the noise immediately stopped. The pain hasn’t gone, but the ‘grating gear’ noise has stayed away! Praise God for his healing love!’

Kevin Bodsworth, Aubergenville, France

‘ New Wine Europe challenged me to move into the presence of the Lord, leaving my ego behind and truly listening to him. I both received prayer for healing and prayed with other participants for healing – and discovered that God sometimes wants us to focus our prayer on barriers within us before we can deal with physical healing. My prayer for someone’s damaged knee seemed to meet with no success until it became clear that God wanted me and the person I was praying for to realise that we were worthy of receiving healing. His power poured out on us – and it seems to still be working in me this week. I sense a real opening to his Word that promises authenticity; I’m no longer mouthing ‘church words’ but feel his Spirit guiding me. It was a breakthrough weekend.’

Beth Johnson, Christ Church Amsterdam

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STORIES

‘ Our job is to invest in the next generation’ An interview with Mike Pilivachi

Mike is part of Soul Survivor, a church aiming to reach out to the young people of Watford. He is also an associate director of Soul Survivor Ministries, a youth organisation seeking to reach, disciple, equip and empower young people to make a difference in their generation.

What does youth work look like in the UK today?

I believe secular youth work is dying a death in this country. The government is pulling funding everywhere and youth workers don’t know why they’re doing it. But the good news is that the Church is doing the bulk of the work, and we do it with purpose and vision.

Lots of Christian youth groups are going for it and are on fire. There’s such an openness to Jesus in this age group. The cynicism and secular humanist worldview affects teenagers less than it does adults. 80 per cent of those who become Christians do so by the age of 21; it’s still a great harvest field.

But we do see a mixed picture, with many Christian youth leaders lacking confidence and support, feeling out of their depth in some of the issues they’re facing.

What are these issues?

Increasingly, youth leaders are choosing not to discuss sex any longer – they’re scared about what 30

might come up. They want speakers to address it from the platform at festivals, when the best place to talk about this is in the local youth group, where you can talk pastorally.

How can we tackle this problem?

We’ve got to train up youth leaders, support them and value them, so that they feel equipped to the job they’re called to do. The whole issue of sex and relationships is a big one. As an evangelical I don’t want to change anything that the Bible teaches – sex is between one man and one woman in a covenant of marriage which is for life – but we can no longer get away with simply saying ‘the Bible says so’. We need to address it in the context of who we are as human beings, and in a positive way. God gives two gifts to his people – one is the gift of marriage, and the other is the gift of celibacy. Celibacy is actually a gift.

Is this a message you want teenagers to hear?

Yes, but part of the problem is communication. If teenagers hear, ‘Don’t have sex because it might screw you up later’, then they look at their friends who are having sex and don’t seem screwed up but in fact seem to be enjoying themselves, that’s not a great apologetic. A better one is, ‘Hey, here’s a wonderful gift, the gift of celibacy, until the gift of marriage, and here’s why.’ It’s not just about having to wait until you get married. You learn things as you grow in the gift of celibacy, and there are things you can give to others.

What stories have you heard recently that give you hope?

There are lots of stories of young people stepping out and talking about Jesus. We know of some guys doing amazing things in Sheffield, going out to where the young people are and making relationships – good youth work has always been relational.

Two 18 year-olds we know were in a pub recently and they felt the Lord tell them to buy a drink for two other guys sitting in the pub. It could have been a disaster, but the blokes accepted, so they sat and talked with them, and told them things they thought God was saying to them. One of them has now become a Christian and he goes to church with them. There’s so many stories of young people taking the initiative, and it’s wonderful.

What part do events like Soul Survivor play?

Young people are now more open than ever to inviting their friends to Christian events. At Soul Survivor tons of non-Christians come along, and they don’t turn up on their own – someone invited them. Last summer nearly 2000 gave their lives to Jesus, and I think that was half the number of non-Christians who attended. At different festivals, not just ours, whole chunks of young people are giving their lives to Jesus.

What keeps you motivated to continue in youth ministry?

Well, I would love to give up, but the reason I keep going is that the people

I work with are so useless, and if I handed over to them they’d make a total pig’s ear of the whole thing!

Joking aside, I’m 53 now. I’m one of the oldest youth workers in the world! I feel my age sometimes. I keep asking the Lord ‘Is it time?’ because it’s hard to be relevant – will they get fed up with me? I don’t get their culture, I don’t get their music... I don’t even get their language – they have to teach me. And they call me grandad, which is really annoying.

But I love working with young people!

I love their openness, their hearts, their willingness to change. There’s a time limit on what I’m doing, but in the meantime, I hope I’ll serve them in some capacity.

I also have the joy of knowing that this is the thing that God called me to.

Anything you’d like us to pray for?

perfect. Don’t wait until they’re trustworthy, because then they’ll be as old as you are, and even then they might not get it right. Trust them now. Our job is to invest in the next generation.

STORIES

‘ I love working with young people! I love their openness, their hearts, their willingness to change’

When I was first a Christian, I would never have guessed it was this, but whatever it was God had for me, that was what I wanted.

To reverse the ageing process, and pray with loads of faith, that would be great!

For us at Soul Survivor, that we’d keep listening to God and being obedient. Sometimes when you’ve got something that’s well established, it’s harder to take risks. When we started we did the most foolish things, but now I fear I’m getting too sensible. I want an attitude of, ‘We think you’re saying this Lord – it doesn’t make sense – but we’re just going with it.’

Any final words of encouragement?

Love your local youth worker! If you’re a church leader, your youth worker won’t do things as well as you would, they’ll mess up the service if you give it to them, but give it to them anyway. Don’t wait until they’re

An interActive dAy looking At where youth ministry is going in our churches. whAt Are the chAllenges we fAce now, And whAt do we predict will be the chAllenges for the future?

saturday 22 OctOber 2011: LOndOn Hosted by Paul unsworth & Liz bewley

New Wine are running three regional youth work training events in 2011 and 2012, priced at just £10 per person: Saturday 22 October 2011: St Paul’s Ealing, London Saturday 12 November 2011: All Saints’ Marple, Stockport Saturday 28 January 2012: Trinity Cheltenham For more information and to book go to: www.new-wine .org/events

Just £ 10 pe r perso

n

saturday 12 nOvember 2011: stOckPOrt Hosted by nathan Iles & kizzy darashah

saturday 28 January 2012: cHeLtenHam Hosted by Gavin calver & Jon tattersall

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STORIES

‘ There were thrills and spills, false starts, uncomfortable tensions and downright difficult confrontations, but this new thing began to grow’ For this church, it was indeed time for a new thing. Kairos also describes how we hope to act in our missional communities – looking for where the Kingdom is coming, and becoming part of it.

From traditional parish to mission-shaped communities: adversity or adventure? Mark Carey describes the transformation of Kairos Network Church in Harrogate

Harrogate calling

First my attention was grabbed by a job advert promising a ‘mission-shaped opportunity’; then I heard a passionate verbal appeal for the same post at the 2007 New Wine Leadership Conference.

I was hooked. Here was a fantastic chance to do a new thing.

I arrived in Harrogate to lead St Mary’s and All Saints’ that October. Within 12 months we began the significant transition from parish church to a ‘fresh expression’ of church, serving beyond the traditional Church of England parish boundaries.

The parish was originally established to serve a particular part of the town. It had two centres of worship: St Mary’s, the main parish church, and All Saints’, a chapel for an outlying area. Due to severe structural problems both buildings were closed down shortly after January 2007.

The congregations continued to meet – St Mary’s in a school, and All Saints’ in the local Methodist Church – but numbers were 32

dwindling and there was a real lack of vision. Something had to change.

Doing a new thing

And change it did. During a transitional period, we: • Decreased the number of services, to create space for mission • Moved out of the school into the old church hall, making it simpler to gather together for worship • Began ‘café style’ worship to help create community • Purposefully shared faith stories, raising expectations of Kingdom activity • Began to ask: how can we gather as communities of disciples, in simple, flexible and purposeful ways, and still be ‘church’?

Out of this process emerged the first mission-shaped communities (MSCs). Each one of these small- to mid-size groups (up to 30 people) is treated as a church in its own right, meeting not in church buildings, but in homes, cafés, pubs, or workplaces.

There were thrills and spills, false starts, uncomfortable tensions and downright difficult confrontations; but this new thing began to grow, with a vision to release communities of followers to live out the mission of Jesus.

We renamed ourselves the Kairos Network Church. Jesus used the word kairos of the ‘appointed time’ in the purposes of God: ‘The time [kairos] has come, the kingdom of God is near. Repent and believe the good news’ (Mark 1:15).

We also began the process of becoming a Bishop’s Mission Order (BMO), laying down parish status and becoming a network church.

Encouragingly, senior Church of England staff were hugely supportive, and we began operating as a BMO in May this year.

Different shapes of mission

Those brave souls who have started a MSC find themselves on quite an adventure. Things can change quickly and look very different within a few months of start-up, as the community responds to the opportunities and calling of God and the personal circumstances of those involved, finding things that don’t work – and things that do.

The groups enjoy low control by the church leadership, and we encourage high accountability, aiming to create an environment of trust which allows people to be the disciples Jesus wants them to be. At the time of writing we have a handful of MSCs at varying degrees of development, each seeking to have an impact either on their networks of friendships or particular geographical areas. They tend to meet in between our twice-monthly central gatherings: The Wanderers are a vibrant example of disciples in mission, paying attention to the transformation of the whole person. This MSC started out with four people connecting with others through social activities. They became part of a walking and exercise group, carrying out street surveys in the centre of Harrogate, and have launched two discipleship groups.

Tom and Hetty Wildblood joined The Wanderers through one of the small Alpha courses they run. They were nominal in belief and their experience of church was largely limited to traditional forms. They describe being involved in a Kairos missional community as having ‘a dramatic effect on all aspects of our lives over the past two years.’

Following a powerful encounter with the Holy Spirit, they are being encouraged to continue living life in the Spirit. In practical terms, Tom and Hetty have been helped to be more financially secure by attending a CAP (Christians against Poverty) course with someone else from the MSC. Another member helped them both stop smoking. They say, ‘We have certainly become less selfish in our day-to-day actions.

Kairos is bringing goodness and understanding of God into a wider community and it doesn’t require bricks and mortar as a foundation.’

Vintage is a group of young adults building a shared life around meals, worship and mutual encouragement, reaching out to people they meet through workplaces and family life. They recently gathered nearly 40 people for a picnic. One of the couples from the core team is bringing together a group of men for Thursday evening football, as well as getting to know their wives and girlfriends.

Links is a MSC that may point to the development of the wider Kairos network. This group is from another Harrogate church. They want to do ‘a new thing’ with Kairos, but remain in good relationship with their own church. Thus they are finding missional accountability, supervision and support from Kairos, and pastoral support and encouragement from their ‘sending’ church. They are now working out a vision for a particular geographical area.

Elpis is a new MSC serving in elderly people’s homes and aiming – among other things – to develop discipleship cells. It may not be the

most glamorous mission field but promises to be very fruitful, with an ageing population both locally and nationally.

STORIES

Recently I led Communion in the main room of a Wetherspoon pub with The Wanderers. We were with people who – because they have relationships of trust with this missional community, though professing no faith – wanted to share in what was happening. We were seeing people, there and then, coming closer to the Kingdom.

Off the map

Someone who was praying about my ministry a while ago had the words ‘off the map’ come to mind. How true! Going from traditional parish church to network church is not a much-travelled journey for many churches. Our friends at St Thomas’ in Sheffield have been really helpful, but there is still a sense of going into uncharted territory.

We take inspiration from the journey of God’s people after the Exodus, especially Numbers 9:23: ‘At the Lord’s command they encamped, and at the Lord’s command they set out.’ This is what I continually encourage the community of Kairos to do: live and move at the Lord’s command. There is a lot of muddle, we sometimes don’t know what to do, and we often fall back into old ways. We aren’t anything like perfect at this – but we are learning, and enjoying the adventure.

Mark Carey Mark leads Kairos with his wife Penny. Their vision is to release communities of followers in the mission of Jesus.

They are also on the New Wine North & East Leadership Team, and are members of the Order of Mission, a network community of missional leaders.

Re-imagining

chuRch revitaLisinG Mission a question for every LoCaL CHurCH: wHo wiLL never be reaCHeD if we onLy Do CHurCH as we are DoinG it now?

Hayes ConferenCe Centre

swanwiCk, DerbysHire

HosteD by JoHn CoLes anD GraHaM Cray A two-day event for those trying to reach people they have never reached before

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STORIES

Trainee paramedic Adam Feery tells us about making space for God in an emergency What do you do?

I’m currently training as a paramedic for the London Ambulance, which involves several months of classroom training, but most of the time spent on the ambulances as part of a two-person crew. For the last two years I’ve been based in Tottenham, where I’ve had a permanent crew-mate whom I work with every day.

What’s a typical day like for you?

A typical day on the road starts at 6.30am, where half an hour is spent making sure the ambulance is legal to drive and is fully stocked. The shift officially starts at 7am, so this first bit is voluntary, but it wouldn’t be much good if things were missing! It’s then a 12-hour shift which is pretty non-stop. From the 999 call to reaching the patient, assessing or treating them and getting them to hospital, is about an hour, and we usually see nine or ten patients a day. The calls can vary wildly – from headaches to ladies in labour to car crashes, so it certainly keeps me on my toes.

What do you love about your job?

More than anything, I love serving the people of Haringey. It’s not the richest area by any means, but it has a character and culture influenced by a community of people that are resilient and unique.

My crew-mate and I often wonder what it is about Haringey that is so drawing; I guess it’s just the beauty of diversity. I also have a heart for children, which made my first call to a seriously ill child difficult.

But being able to help not just the child but the parents as well gives a satisfaction that is simply indescribable.

What are some of the challenges?

There is a fairly prevalent gang culture in Edmonton and Tottenham, which can unfortunately result in a lot of violence. Added to that, the patients seem to be mostly children, already so absorbed into gang life that it can be a real struggle to see a bright future for them. There is so much talent and potential that seems to go to waste for the sake of futile things like

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gang boundaries. A real shift is needed. It is never nice to see a person pass away, and it can be hard to tell family members that there isn’t any more that can be done. I need to balance doing all that I possibly can for the patient with treating the family gently and with respect, helping them into the mourning process.

How do you try to live out your faith at work?

Primarily by trying to live a life that looks different, not to blend in but remain in integrity as Jesus did.

Honestly, some days are better than others, and I feel as if I can go weeks without having thought about what impact I might be making. But just recently a colleague who I work with only on occasion really surprised me. We had had conversations months previous about the value of church life and the close community it provides, but it hadn’t really led to anything more. We were with a patient and were waiting for some pain relief to kick in before moving him, and he started to express how lonely he was due to his condition. Because it was late I had zoned out a little, I was only half listening when I caught my colleague asking if he had ever considered church, because ‘they’re accepting and loving there’! Did I hear that right? A non-Christian evangelising to another non-Christian! I can often think of myself as lazy, and the ‘shine your light’ method of living out faith a bit of a cop out. But it turns out that to think like that would be to underestimate both God and people; the Lord is clearly in the business of transforming tired comments into new conversations.

Can you think of a particular time when you’ve experienced God at work?

There have been situations where I know that only the grace and love of God could have helped me and kept me going when things could have become too much. Thinking of certain 999 calls where I’ve felt so close to being out of control with all that’s going on, I have learnt to sit quietly afterwards in the presence of God and allow him to restore his peace and perspective. It can seem a bit of slog in any workplace, wondering day after day what God might have in store for people or where he might be moving, so to take some time out, even just ten minutes to know a fresh embrace of the Father, can make the difference between carrying on and stalling.

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ears ago, when we lived in Jerusalem, we knew that the Feast of Tabernacles (Sukkoth) was upon us by the sound of tapping hammers. Jews observe this festival today by living in temporary shelters, with leaves for a roof – one of our neighbours cheated by removing tiles from his balcony roof and replacing them with branches!

John Chorlton explains why he’s having the time of his life in a so-called ‘crime-ridden, drug-dominated, unhealthy estate’ in a deprived area of Slough

In John 1:14 we read, ‘So the Word became human and made his home among us.’ Older versions used the words ‘tabernacled among us’, referring to the idea behind the Feast of Tabernacles. The feast is a reminder of the life lived in tents by God’s people in the wilderness; a reminder that this world is not our home, we’re just passing through – our living is temporal. However, our lives are also incarnational: the word of Jesus becomes flesh in us.

From Jerusalem to Slough

We now live in Britwell, Slough. I told this to a hairdresser in Reading, 20 miles away, and he was shocked. He wouldn’t live in such a crime-ridden, drug-dominated, unhealthy estate. He was not convinced when I told him that 90 per-cent of the people were hard working and honest; that living here is far more peaceful than when we lived in Oxford City Centre (there have been no murders here in seven years) or Jerusalem (no tear gas either).

If I had space to tell the history of Britwell you would understand how this 15,000-strong parish was created in the late 1950s, and how it came to have such a reputation – but that reputation is no longer the reality. This history would also tell that Christian ministry imposed or brought in from the outside has by-and-large failed. Seven years after arriving, we are even more convinced that only local church can change this place; it has to be incarnational in the truest sense.

I first set foot in Britwell in 2003, when a clergy friend who was convinced I was called to the parish took my wife Susan and I there from our home in Oxford to look around. Near the derelict church we witnessed some children breaking into a car. I was sure I did not want to come because: a) I would never be brave enough to live in Britwell; b) I could never handle a £1.3-million building programme in a church where the treasurer had left with the building fund (it eventually cost £2 million); and c) could we ever expect to see people coming to faith in one of the most deprived wards in England? But Susan caught the vision, the Holy Spirit changed my heart, and the view from here seven years on is altogether different.

In eternity, when the Word of God looked at Earth, it must have seemed far away and such a mess, but when he got here Jesus didn’t just breeze through. He stayed, he wept, he ‘tabernacled’, he hurt, he died –

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‘ I have given up booze and men to follow Jesus. Just let me enjoy a fag!’ and if I read the gospel correctly, he also had a great time! We are having the time of our lives, but it is still hard work. As the 85-year-old parish appointment representative said in 2004, ‘We didn’t think anyone would be daft enough to apply!’

New life

In August 2004 we were 16 people in a borrowed building; Susan and I the only ‘outsiders’. During the service, Jim (all names have been changed in this article to protect people’s privacy) stumbled through the door, drunk. An older member who had survived being buried alive in the Blitz said in a loud whisper: ‘What the hell is he doing here?!’ In 2010 I conducted Jim’s funeral in our new church building. He had loved being part of our community. The funeral service sheet carried a wonderful photo of him, apron-clad, proudly standing in the church kitchen; and that older church member was there with tears in her eyes.

In 2007 we were worshipping in a hired family welfare building – a wooden hut, like most public buildings in Britwell. After a baptism service one lady said to me in a rather condescending way, ‘Do you realise you had the biggest crook in Britwell in church today?’ I replied, ‘Thank God, another lost sheep.’

At a similar time Jackie became a Christian. To begin with she had to have a cigarette break halfway through the service. One day my wife challenged her to try and stay for the whole service, to which she replied, ‘Susan, I have given up booze and men to follow Jesus. Just let me enjoy a fag!’

Our electoral roll is now 72. We have taken 20-30 people to the New Wine Summer Conference for the past five years. Not everyone who goes can afford it, but God has wonderfully provided.

Regeneration

I am often asked how we raised the money for our new church building. We didn’t raise it all – we are still in debt. But God knows our needs and he is on the case. When I left Oxford, an elderly lady asked me to promise to do her funeral. I went back to Oxford for her 100th birthday, when she reminded me about her funeral, saying, ‘I have left a little something for your church in my will.’ The little something turned out to be £70,000!

I am part of the Slough Council Regeneration Group that hopes to bring a whole new feel to our area.

As one of the consultants said at a recent meeting: ‘Let the church be the first of many fine buildings.’

We are a sign and a symbol to this area that God

lives here. We clean up the local park, which some people dare not walk across, and our Totzone, coffee mornings, Royal Wedding party, art week, magic shows, Britwell’s Got Talent, Alpha courses and so on leave lasting memories in our hearts, and the circle widens. Citizens Advice also opens in our building once a week, and Slough Foodbank (Trussell Trust) is following this September. Hope is rising, and God is transforming our lives and community.

Our message is incarnational. We may live temporal lives, but we are drenched in the power of the risen Christ to live and die here, tabernacled in Britwell.

The light has come and the darkness cannot put it out.

John Chorlton John, with his wife Susan, lived in Jerusalem for 13 years, where he was the head teacher of the Anglican International School. He is now Vicar of St George’s Britwell, a vibrant, growing church in Slough.

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I say I never met him – which in one sense is true – but I did know him, or I certainly feel like I knew him. I have seen him have fun with his kids, at his morning coffee shop, speaking to thousands on stage; I know what music he was into, the films he liked, books he read, games he played, apps he had on his phone; I know of the friends he had, people he loved, and those he couldn’t stand – though they were very few. We even exchanged a word or two.

But we never once looked into the eye of the other, let alone stood in the same room.

Facebook nation What brought us together – if you can even use that term – was social media; technologies like Facebook, Twitter, Google+, Flickr and YouTube. Today these technologies are bringing the distant closer, the lonely friendship, and the silenced a voice. They are not only enabling revolutions from the streets of Cairo to the crumbled rooftops of Tripoli, but they are themselves a revolution, which is reshaping the way we communicate, collaborate and curate the world around us. And boy has it happened quickly.

Take Facebook for instance – the social networking platform of the millennial generation that started life as a Harvard student’s plaything to rate the girls on campus (see the 2010 David Fincher movie The Social Network for more on that story) – which has now become an international phenomena and business powerhouse. Little did Mark Zuckerberg know in his bedroom on that fateful night, that five years on he would have created a platform that, at the time of writing, has over 750 million users worldwide. If all the users of Facebook today were to congregate on one landmass, put a flag in the ground and call themselves a nation, they would be citizens of the third largest country in the world.

Not only has Facebook become a media habit all on its own, but it has defined a whole new sector of our vocabulary. Not too long ago if you received an email informing you (quite politely) that I had ‘written on your wall’, you would think you had just become the victim of some petty vandalism. In a pre-Facebook era if I were to ‘Poke’ you, ask you to ‘Like’ something, or ask you to be my ‘Friend’, you would think I were a little odd.

Separately connected

Of course while Facebook may be well on its way to transforming our social lives (or for some of us creating them), Twitter has been busy kicking the historical way of doing journalism, storytelling and

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oday, the 5 September 2011, I am feeling oddly sad. A man I have never met, not in person anyway, died*. He committed suicide on the steps of his church in a southern state of America after battling with depression.

‘ If all the users of Facebook...were to congregate on one landmass… they would be citizens of the third largest country in the world’ debate firmly in the guts. The 140-character-based messaging service has toppled newspapers, helped liberate several Arab states and ruin reputations of international footballers – and that’s just the past six months. With over 200 million of us ‘tweeting’ and ‘retweeting’ everything from what we had for lunch to our thoughts on the PM, we are seeing a whole new way of consuming media and the world around us.

During this year’s nationally documented nuptials, the words ‘Royal Wedding’ were being tweeted 6369 times every second (source: http://bit.ly/ mPQNgp) as people around the world shared pictures from street parties, commented on Kate’s dress and sent their own congratulations to the happy couple. What once would have been an event curated and managed by the international broadcasting elite (which of course it was), was given a ‘social layer’ as people consumed the event together, yet separately, connected through an online discourse that allowed millions to share the experience.

Of course this is no longer confined to big event programming. If you have watched Have I Got News For You (#HIGNFY), Question Time (#bbcqt) or the Seattle drama The Killing (#c4TheKilling), you will have seen the opening credits and trailers littered with # symbols and, to many, an indiscernible group of letters – ‘hashtags’ – each pertaining to a search term for those discussing the programme on Twitter while watching. It appears the broadcasters are fully aware of the innate desire of viewers to connect with one another. What was once primarily an individual pursuit is increasingly becoming a social one. Communities are forming in the back pockets of the internet, collecting like lint around a coin, only these coins are TV shows, bands, blogs, sewing groups and videos of cats playing piano. These communities are becoming the foundations supporting the very structure of the internet and they are growing exponentially.

It seems we cannot help but create them.

Innate sociality

I have been interested for a long time about how communities work. Or, maybe more importantly, why they work. Why is it that we seem to, for 99 per cent plus of human existence, seek out and live in community? It seems to be illogical when you look at it.

*That man was Trey Pennington, www.treypennington.com, to whom this article is dedicated.

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Digital church

‘ Something within us pulses through our brains, hearts and souls, driving us to seek one another out – to be, as it were, social’ Being in community means rubbing up against people; treading on one another’s toes. It means being faced with the reality and frailty of our own humanness and our ability to do inhumane things to one another. Yet something within us pulses through our brains, hearts and souls, driving us to seek one another out – to be, as it were, social.

This sociality seems to be innate. We are virtually unable to separate ourselves from it. We often seek escape from it, from time to time at least, but very few of us can operate as complete recluses, and those of us who do often suffer for it. There seems to be something about our own sociality that is woven into the fabric of human kind and I am inclined to believe that the weaver put it there for a reason.

In the opening lines of the Bible and again in John 1 we read that God – three in one, three persons yet one body – created human life to be like him; a perfect community of Father, Son and Holy Spirit loving one another. This may lead us to presume that sociality itself has been imprinted upon us – as if we were all pieces in an ever-expanding jigsaw puzzle. It seems we have been made with a need for one another. A need that causes us to seek one another out, to find ‘the one’, the place where we fit, that sense of knowing and being known, of community, of family – of home.

This inbuilt longing for community may go some way to answering why we find these technologies so attractive. Why we want to become friends, to connect, to ‘Like’ one another. The speed and ubiquity that the internet and social networks and media have brought is now enabling us to act upon a multi-millennial-old urge to search out one another at a pace that the world has never seen before. With every post, update, status, video and blog we are generating more and more expressions of our digital self to a waiting and watching world.

Social media critics often argue that this new digital expression is cheapening human contact, that it is eroding our attention spans and calling into question deep-held concepts of truth, knowledge and wisdom – and they are right to do so. As the church of Jesus we need to hold this desire to embrace one another through all means possible in tension with our need to present the God we know and love in a knowledgeable and loving way. We must do that. But we must also move the conversation forward. The world over, the people that Jesus died for are crying out to be known, to be heard – to find a home.

So let us hear their call, so that we read fewer stories of friends taking their lives on the steps of the church, and more of them being welcomed in through the doors of Heaven.

James Poulter James is a Social Communication Consultant at Lexis PR and Member of the Public Relations Consultancies Association’s Digital Steering Committee. Read more from James at www.jamespoulter.co.uk, or follow him on Twitter @jamespoulter.

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One hour may be all it takes to increase new parents’ chances of staying together - for life. Harry Benson sets out the challenge of changing a nation’s relationships

I

’m in a Surestart Children’s Centre. Their early years groups can have anything up to 20 parents. Today it’s just me and three mums.

We ought not to have much in common. I’m 50; they’re all in their 20s. My background is boarding school, helicopters and high finance. Theirs is managing the daily grind in a not terribly affluent area of Bristol. Their babies are being looked after by the staff while we spend an hour chatting. One mum is married, one living with her partner, and one single.

I smile and ask them if they know why I’m there. No idea. That’s good because they will have no expectations.

I tell them we’re going to talk about relationships. There’s a slight but perceptible tightening in their body language; a hint of nervousness. But I’m going to entertain them.

I’m going to explain three helpful ideas that make relationships work really well. The ideas work best with a loved one but – I look to the lone mum – they also work well for all our relationships. I’m going to embarrass myself, not them, by telling how I blow it like everyone else but how these ideas help me get it right occasionally.

They relax a little.

I tell them my main qualification is that my wife has put up with me for 25 years, and we have six children. They always laugh at that. Now they’re starting to engage with me. I know how wonderful it is to be a new parent but also how exhausting and sometimes scary it can be.

With a new baby and so much going on, it’s all too easy for mum and dad to drift apart or start stupid arguments that get out of hand. Very soon we’ve forgotten the whole point of getting together in the first place.

And we’re off. I’ve got their attention. We are all just ordinary parents together. We spend a lot of the time laughing. And I run them through a little session on relationships called Let’s Stick Together. They love it.

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British breakdown

Allow me to give you a quick outline of family life in Britain today. Family breakdown has become a massive problem. Half of all children born today will not be living with both parents on their 16th birthday. There are lots of knock-on effects from this, resulting in a bill to the taxpayer of £42 billion per year – more than the entire defence budget – and it’s going to get much worse. Yet there is no national policy of any kind that considers how to prevent or reduce this.

The unspoken assumption is that there’s not much that can be done. Family breakdown is inevitable. Everyone has heard of couple counselling, but no-one expects miracles. If couples want to split up, we have to deal with the consequences as best as we can.

Yet a great deal of family breakdown is completely avoidable. The best evidence for this comes from studies showing how fewer couples split up if they have been through a top-quality relationship course. People can learn how to relate well. Churches have been doing this for years through marriage courses and marriage preparation courses.

Marriage matters. Half of all family breakdowns happen during the first few years of parenthood, not so much because of divorce, but because huge numbers of unmarried parents separate. Nine per-cent of married parents split before their child’s fifth birthday compared to 35 per cent of unmarried parents. I think this is one of the most shocking statistics in Britain.

There’s currently a big debate about whether married parents do better simply because of their background. The much more plausible explanation is to do with dedication.

There’s a growing body of evidence that couples – married and unmarried – do better when they make joint decisions about their future together. You can slide into moving in

together or getting pregnant. But you decide to spend a life together. Marriage is the ultimate act of dedication.

The bottom line is that we need to find ways of helping unmarried parents with small babies improve their odds of staying together. We need to reach out beyond the church, and beyond the label of marriage. That’s where Let’s Stick Together comes in.

The session in a nutshell

Let’s Stick Together is a simple one-hour session that teaches three principles – bad habits, good habits, and friendship.

It’s a condensed version of the best longer courses, but it covers the essentials.

Researchers have known for years that being nice to one another isn’t enough for a successful relationship. The biggest predictor of problems early on is how we mistreat one another.

Communication is important, but our attitude and behaviour are what really count. We only communicate well when we’re thinking the best of each other.

To describe bad habits, I use the acronym STOP – Scoring points, Thinking the worst, Opting out, and Putting down.

It’s really simple. If my wife Kate tells me I’ve left my trousers on the floor and instead of dealing with it I point at her stuff, I’m scoring points. If I tell her she’s stupid for spilling a cup of tea, I’m putting down. You get the idea.

My negative reaction, my STOP sign, is likely to lead to some sort of unpleasantness. STOP warns me to check my attitude and change my behaviour. If I can nip my own

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‘ Half of all children born today will not be living with both parents on their 16th birthday’

bad behaviours in the bud, we’ll argue less and I’ll be nicer to be around. Small changes make big differences.

For good habits, I have further simplified Gary Chapman’s brilliant idea of ‘Love Languages’. This incredibly powerful idea is well known in the Church but not at all known in the wider community. We all respond to love in different ways. The flaw is that we tend to assume others are like us. A couple can both love one another, yet both not feel loved. There are five different ways of giving love: time, words, actions, gifts and touch.

The trick is to ask which of these our loved one responds to best – which one is their love language? You may be surprised that it’s not what you thought. Be as specific as possible. Then just do it and see what happens.

For friendship, I am again looking at a negative and a positive. It’s so much better for all if mum gets help from dad. But mum isn’t helping herself if she points out all of dad’s mistakes, then decides, ‘It’s easier if I do it myself.’

Most mums recognise this as a negative in themselves.

The positive is to make a bit of time for each other once a week. Exhaustion and stress can make it all too easy to forget the basics. Time means friendship. Friends help one another.

None of this is rocket science. Talking about these ideas doesn’t need a degree in counselling or psychotherapy.

It just needs a parent who wants to make a difference, knows about the ups and downs of life as a couple, who can run a small group, and who can explain these ideas from their own personal experience.

In Bristol alone, we’ve been running Let’s Stick Together for five years. We reach over a quarter of all first-time mums. That’s 100 sessions run for some 900 new parents every year. We do it through NHS post-natal clinics run by health visitors and early years groups run by Surestart children’s centres. I have a team of four volunteer parents.

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jointly received some serious funding from the Department of Education to spread this programme throughout the country. We will be launching a short training programme for Let’s Stick Together volunteers this Autumn.

‘ We need to find ways of helping unmarried parents with small babies improve their odds of staying together. We need to reach out beyond the church, and beyond the label of marriage’

So if you’ve ever wanted to help new parents, this is a fabulous opportunity. We need health visitors and Surestart workers to open doors. We need parents to run sessions. We will be a volunteer army of Christians teaching simple but powerful principles about relationships at a key stage of life.

All we’ve done is make friends with the people who run groups and offer them a free session. When we get a booking, we ask one of the volunteer parents if they are available. They just turn up and run the session. That’s it.

Where you might fit in

I don’t want to make grand claims for Let’s Stick Together.

A one-hour programme won’t save the world. But it just might be a beginning, particularly if it helps remove some of the stigma from attending longer relationship courses in the future. And if every family learns about STOP signs and Love Languages, it might have a knock-on effect on the conversations all families have at home.

I’ve just handed over Let’s Stick Together to my friends at the wonderful national charity Care for the Family. We’ve

For more information visit www.letssticktogether.com or call Care for the Family on 029 2081 0800 For your chance to win a free copy of Let’s Stick Together, simply email the title to mag@new-wine.org before 30 November 2011 (one entry per person).

Harry Benson Harry is a Falklands war veteran, a successful businessman, and one of the UK’s leading champions of marriage and relationship education. As well as his latest title Let’s Stick Together – The Relationship Book for New Parents, he co-wrote the influential family policy papers Breakdown Britain and Breakthrough Britain.

New Wine Women’s Days 2012

A day of worship, teaching and ministry especially for women Anne Coles, Nadine Parkinson, Lindsay Melluish and Fi Perry will be joined by guest speakers including Cheryl McGuinness (Harrogate), Lin Button (London) & Julie Sheldon (Poole).

International Conference Centre, Harrogate Saturday 3 March 2012 Emmanuel Centre, London Saturday 10 March 2012 Lighthouse, Poole Saturday 17 March 2012

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Feedback from

2011

3 EVENTS IN

3 REGIONS

‘It was one of the most amWomen’s Days so many women together azing days ever. To see love for the Lord was soin one place showing their insp most of the day inirteinarg,s.an’ d I spent A‘ s a first timer I was ve by myself, but made new ry impressed. I went speakers were engaging and friends on the day. The spiritual, inspiring and ve the theme was excellent: rollercoaster of a day – it ry moving. An emotional certainly won’t be my last .’

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47

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TOUGH QUESTIONS

‘ Where is God in a humanitarian crisis?’

When our TVs show images of babies dying in anguish in yet another humanitarian crisis, our faith as Christians is often challenged.

How do we reconcile our belief in a loving, omniscient God, with such suffering?

Baroness Caroline Cox offers two responses

‘ Pity weeps and turns away.

Compassion weeps and puts out a hand to help.’

These challenging words of St Francis of Assisi help to explain why it is often in the extreme forms of human suffering that we find the greatest manifestations of Christian love and even joy.

Confronted by any suffering, and perhaps especially by suffering on a huge scale in war or natural disasters, we can all weep – and, feeling helpless or overwhelmed, turn away.

But compassion puts out a hand to help – however inadequate that help may seem. And so often, when we do engage with those who are suffering, we find miracles of grace: Good Samaritans giving joyfully and those who are afflicted inspiring us with love, peace and generosity.

Generosity in poverty

Often it is the poorest of the poor who are the most generous. Examples abound. I will never forget a time when we were taking medical aid to Poland in the dark days of martial law, when there was often no food in the shops and people were dying from hunger. Fresh fruit for non-Communist Party members was especially scarce and many suffered vitamin deficiency diseases.

On one occasion we offloaded our aid in a town stricken by poverty and chronic shortages of food.

48

One member of the church had been able to grow some strawberries. After unloading, the local community prepared a feast for us of those precious strawberries. I tried to eat as few as I could, leaving as many as possible for those in need of these vitamin-filled delicacies. Then, when my truck driver Tony and I left, I found a brown paper bag hidden under my seat containing the remaining strawberries. I was choked and asked Tony how he explained the situation when he returned to the UK; how the plight of the Polish people was so desperate, yet they were so generous. Being a good Cockney, he expressed himself better than I did, simply saying, gruff with emotion: ‘They got nothing, and they give you everything.’

I’ve heard it said that ‘only where there is great suffering can there flourish that which saves’. We often see this in humanitarian crises. Our Lord did not promise us lives free from suffering, but he often proves that he is ‘a very present help in trouble’ (Psalm 46.1). One Anglican Deaconess in the midst of a life-threatening humanitarian crisis told me: ‘I pray to God in the calm days; then when trouble comes, I find him at my side – and I know real peace’.

Remembering the Holy Innocents

Another insight into the subject of suffering came to me when I was in southern Sudan during the war

‘ It is at the foot of the Cross that we can glimpse some insights into the meaning of suffering’ which left two million dead and four million displaced. I had been walking through killing fields of human and animal corpses and the burnt ruins of the scorched-earth policy inflicted on innocent civilians. The final evening I sat outside my tent and wept. My faith was profoundly challenged.

Then it occurred to me that perhaps one reason why we, who live in freedom and relative abundance, fail to come to terms with such suffering is reflected in the way in which we celebrate Christmas. It may seem incongruous to think of Christmas in the scorching heat of Sudan – but it is the beginning of the story of God’s love manifest in his incarnation, which ended in his death on the Cross.

At Christmas we appropriately celebrate the birth of the baby Jesus.

But as our Christmas festivities continue, with parties, Christmas presents and happy Bank Holiday activities, we tend to forget that, while Mary was celebrating the birth of her son Jesus, many other mothers were weeping for their dead sons, killed by King Herod.

Many churches do remember the slaughter of the Holy Innocents on 28 December, but if we forget or

My thoughts continued to that ‘Good’ Friday when Christ was dying in agony on the Cross, and all his mother could do was to stand with him while the sword of suffering pierced her heart. It occurred to me that perhaps part of any Christian’s calling should be a readiness to attend whatever Calvaries our Lord may call us to attend and to be present, as Mary was, in heartbroken love, profound grief and immense respect. For it is at the foot of the Cross that we can glimpse some insights into the meaning of suffering, and of the redemptive power of sacrificial love.

in humanitarian crises, often caused by persecution, are always humbled and inspired by their faith, love, courage – and joy! Their faith rebukes and shores up mine.

The persecuted Church continues to worship joyfully even in the ruins of burnt-out buildings and to grow even in the midst of tribulation. Moreover, with very few exceptions, we do not find any desire for vengeance. The Christians we meet demonstrate love and forgiveness for those who cause their suffering – like Ma Su, a lady from the Karen tribe in Burma. Her village had been burnt to the ground, her home and all her possessions destroyed and then she was shot in

cold blood by a Burmese soldier.

When asked how she felt about the soldier who shot her, her reply was simple: ‘I love him. The Bible tells us we must love our enemies. So I love him. He is my brother.’

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downplay that part of the equation of Christmas, it is perhaps not surprising if we do not have a theology capable of understanding the mystery of suffering.

Her words echo Christ’s on the Cross, praying for forgiveness for those who were inflicting his agonising death. That is the heart of the Christian gospel of redeeming love which is so often manifest in the suffering of humanitarian crises: not removing the suffering but redeeming it. And that is why we can, against all our human instincts, call that dark Friday of Christ’s agonising death ‘Good’.

Redeeming suffering

Of course these Calvaries do not have to be in war zones. They may be on our own doorsteps, in hospitals, hospices or elsewhere in our local community. But those of us who are privileged to visit Christians suffering

Women & Leadership Conference 2012 Central & South West

Friday 13 – Sunday 15 January 2012 Holiday Inn Bristol With Anne Coles, Karen Bailey, Fi Perry and special guests Sarah Richards & Karen Jones

North & East

Caroline Cox Caroline was created a Life Peer in 1982. She was Deputy Speaker of the House of Lords from 1985 to 2005; Chancellor of Liverpool Hope University; Chief Executive of HART undertaking aid and advocacy in Sudan, Nigeria, Uganda, Armenia, India, Burma and Timor-Leste, and is the author of several books on related topics.

An event for women leading in their own right, women leading in partnership with their husbands, and women supporting their husbands as they lead.

Feedback from 2011 ‘God was moving and blessing right from the start. The speakers were excellent and our leadership was recognised and affirmed.’

‘I arrived at the conference feeling battle worn and weary, but went home feeling refreshed, renewed and empowered by the Holy Spirit, ready to face the challenges ahead.’

Thursday 19 – Saturday 21 January 2012 Hellaby Hall, Yorkshire With Anne Coles, Nadine Parkinson, Penny Andrews and special guests Ness Wilson & Marjorie Allan

London & South East

Thursday 2 – Saturday 4 February 2012 Holiday Inn, Maidenhead/Windsor With Anne Coles, Lindsay Melluish, Nikki Groarke and special guests Elaine Storkey, Jane Morris & Kate Patterson

49

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Recommended Resources All available to buy from www.newwinedirect.co.uk

Supernova

Diamond Geezers

The summer of 2011 saw The 29th Chapter play their last-ever gigs at New Wine in Shepton Mallet, as their ten-year journey came to an end. Many will remember initial collaborations with worship leaders that brought a freshness to corporate worship. However, their impact in the last decade goes far above guest appearances at summer festivals. Each of their previous releases were raw and honest, and their final album, the nostalgic Supernova, is no exception. Both the title track and the UK chart success Invincible would not be out of place on mainstream airwaves and provide a reminder that The 29th Chapter boast some serious talent. Make it, Times up and Move with me speak of a life beyond earthly success and testify to the fact that although The 29th Chapter has come to an end, there is a bigger story unfolding.

Jamie Thomson is a worship leader based at St Aldates in Oxford.

Are you a ‘coal man’ or a ‘diamond geezer’? Anthony Delaney, former policeman but now a pastor in Manchester, reckons that there are two kinds of men. Coal men are self-centred, struggle with relationships, crumble under pressure and lack substance.

In contrast, a diamond geezer aims to live in good relationships having an inner strength and quality that flow from a life centred on Christ Jesus. The chapters are styled like sermons, making practical points illustrated by Scripture, quotes and stories. The last chapter is a study of the ‘ultimate diamond geezer’, Jesus Christ, and how he can transform men’s lives as evidenced by the experience of Zaccheus and Delaney himself. Delaney writes ‘as a bloke to other blokes’, with the aim of introducing men to Christ. The strength of the book is the stories of lives transformed by God’s love and power. The direct style and sometimes ‘laddish’ humour won’t appeal to everyone, but there’s a bloke who’s just started coming to church who I think might love it. He’s having my copy.

Jon Westall leads St Dunstan, Acton, West London.

The 29th Chapter

Now to Him

Neil Bennetts and Simon Ponsonby

For many looking on at the thousands of people singing songs, lying prostrate and crying out to an invisible God at conferences and events like New Wine, it is easy to see how worshipping God can just seem plain weird! Now to Him is a deeply insightful book on why we are called to worship in the first place, and who it is we are worshipping. Both Neil and Simon weave together deep theological understanding with pastoral experience that underline the enormity of God’s grace and the excitement of the life we are called into. Unsurprisingly, an entire chapter is given to the woman who anointed Jesus’ feet with perfume and did something beautiful ‘in and to’ him. Simon paints the picture of the angels in heaven in awe of this woman saying, ‘At last, someone gets it!’

As you read through each chapter considering who the God we worship really is, it is very likely that you will find yourself saying the same thing: ‘I get it!’

Jonathan Tearne is a member of All Saints Church, Peckham, where he leads worship.

Anthony Delaney

Anthony Delaney will be speaking at the New Wine Men’s Conferences on 12 November in London and 21 January in Manchester. Find out more and book online at www.new-wine.org

Abraham Kuyper: A Short and Personal Introduction Richard Mouw

Fly Worship

Abraham Kuyper is an incredible Christian. He declared that ‘There is not a square inch in the whole domain of our human existence over which Christ, who is Sovereign over all, does not cry “Mine!”’ He was a newspaper editor, shaped a political party and became a politician, all while he was pastoring a church. He then founded a Christian university, was a theologian, wrote an important work on the Holy Spirit and found time to become the prime minister of Holland (1901-1905). He took seriously his square inch theology, yet his name is hardly known among Christians.

This brief and eminently readable book is a superb introduction to Kuyper’s social theology. Section one looks at an overview of Kuyper on theology and culture; section two looks at his legacy for the 21st century. If you want to be shaken from individualism then Kuyper is an excellent remedy, but be warned: this book may well change your life.

Steve Bishop is a member of St Michael’s, Stoke Gifford, Bristol.

Fly Worship is software for small worship bands or solo worship leaders, describing itself as a ‘band in a laptop’. As a small church with one musician (me), we were limited when it came to worship, but Fly has changed that. It’s so easy to use in a live setting; I was using it literally ten minutes after downloading the software. Fly’s tracks are solid recordings – no gaps in the looping feature. I love that the songs are recorded by the same band, so that the band’s sound becomes your sound. It’s given me freedom to lead worship instead of trying to focus on all the elements I used to have to make up for the lack of musicians. I’ve noticed a huge difference in our church; an excitement in worship – the looks on people’s faces are priceless!

Justin Kirkendall is a worship leader from Texas, USA.

RESOURCES GIVEAWAY! Simply email the title of one of the above resources (unfortunately excluding Fly Worship) to mag@new-wine.org for your chance to win a copy. One entry per person. Winners will be chosen at random and notified by email by the end of November 2011.

Simon Ponsonby and Neil Bennetts will be speaking at the New Wine Heart Head Hands Worship Conference on 4 February at St Paul’s Hammersmith, London. Find out more and book online at www.new-wine.org/worship

www.flyworship.com

51

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The new studio album from New Wine.

‘Lord Of The Breakthrough’, ‘Your Love Never Fails’, ‘Our God’, ‘Far Greater’ and ‘Counting On Your Name’.

6

Available from www.newwinedirect.co.uk