O&AN | March 2021

Picasso. Figures features approximately 75 paintings, works on paper, and sculptures by one of the most celebrated figures in modern art. The exhibition offers an in-depth look at Pablo Picasso’s careerlong fascination with the human figure as a means of expressing a range of subjects and emotions.

The Frist Art Museum is the only U.S. venue to host this incredible collection of his work.

Advance timed tickets are required and can be reserved at FristArtMuseum.org/tickets.

THROUGH MAY 2

Downtown Nashville, 919 Broadway, Nashville, TN 37203 · FristArtMuseum.org · @FristArtMuseum · #TheFrist · #FristPicasso

Hospitality sponsor

Gold sponsors

Platinum sponsor

Exhibition organized in partnership with Musée national Picasso-Paris.

Bronze sponsor

Lynn, Ken, and Lauren Melkus

Education and community engagement supporters

Supported in part by our Frist Patrons and Portrait of Dora Maar, 1937. Oil on canvas. Musée National Picasso-Paris, Gift of Pablo Picasso, 1979. MP166. Photo © RMN-Grand Palais (Musée National Picasso-Paris) / Mathieu Rabeau. © 2021 Estate of Pablo Picasso / Artists Rights Society (ARS), New York

FC003128_L1rr_Picasso_Out&About_8.5x11.indd 1

2/9/21 3:12 PM

YOU DESERVE TO BE PAID.

Fre e Con s u l t ation • Call U s 24/7 www.ba rtdurha m . c o m | 615-242-9000 4 0 4 James Roberts on Parkwa y, Su ite 1712, Na sh ville , T N 37219

Contents FAX 615-246-2787 | PHONE 615-596-6210 OUTANDABOUTNASHVILLE.COM STAFF Publisher: Aequalitas Media, LLC

Group Publisher for Aequalitas Media Bill Gemmill Founder and Publisher Emeritus Jerry Jones Managing Editor: James Grady jgrady@outandaboutnashville.com Sales & Marketing: Cody Stallings cstallings@outandaboutnashville.com Design, Layout and Production: Saul Santos fsdemianhades3@gmail.com

CONTRIBUTORS

Writers: DJ Doran, James Grady, Lee Hatcher, Joe Morales, Jason Shawhan, Chris Spear, Dennis R. Upkins Photographers: Cody Stallings Photography Cover: Ravanna-Michelle E. Menendez, Glynnis Garcia for Hair and Blake Danny for Costuming, photographs by Cody Stallings National Advertising Representative: Aequalitas Media 3023 N Clark St #732, Chicago IL 60657 312-600-8823

CORRECTIONS

We regret that the February LGBTQ Business Directory and Travelers’ Guide listed an incorrect phone number for Karuna Therapeutic Solutions. Their correct phone number is 615-669-6621. We apologize for the confusion.

OPPORTUNITIES

Out & About Nashville welcomes volunteer writers, photographers and videographers throughout the year. If you’re interested in contributing to our publication, send an email to editor@outandaboutnashville.com with a resume, contact information and samples of your work if available. Our volunteer staff is unpaid, but contributors do receive credit for their work in our print publication and online. Those seeking an internship in journalism or mass communications are strongly encouraged to apply.

LEGAL

Out & About Nashville strives to be a credible community news organization by engaging and educating our readers. All content of Out & About Nashville is copyrighted 2017 by Out & About Nashville, Inc. and is protected by federal copyright law and shall not be reproduced without the written consent of the publisher. All photography is licensed stock imagery or has been supplied unless otherwise credited to a photographer and may not be reproduced without permission. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers and cartoonists published herein is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of names or pictorial representations does not necessarily indicate the sexual orientation of the person or persons. Out & About Nashville accepts unsolicited material but cannot take responsibility for its return. The editor reserves the right to accept, reject or edit submissions. All rights revert to authors upon publication. The editorial positions of Out & About Nashville are expressed in editorials and in the editor’s notes as determined by the editor. Other opinions are those of writers and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Out & About Nashville or its staff. Letters to the editor are encouraged but may be edited for clarity and length. There is no guarantee that letters will be published. Out & About Nashville only accepts adult advertising within set guidelines and on a case-by-case basis.

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Album Review: We Will Always Love You, by The Avalanches

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From Our Publisher, DJ Doran

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Celebrating Monica Roberts A Transgriot Tribute

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The Special Shelf: Together Together + Queer Japan

Lilac Experience 12 The Ravanna-Michelle E. Menendez Wants To Change the Playing Field For Trans People

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My Experience Seeking ‘Top Surgery’ in Nashville

for Trans Visibility Day 20 Books My Reading List Eats the World 22 Joe Cutting Boards: Wood, Plastic, Glass, & Beyond

Album Review

Album Review:

We Will

Always Love You,

by The Avalanches

Chris Spear On December 11, Australian group The Avalanches released their third album, We Will Always Love You, and it is massive. Listening to this album almost feels like watching a movie. The tracks seamlessly blend into one another. So many times before I knew the album well, I wasn’t sure which track I was listening to. After listening to it a few times a day since its release, I can say it is one of my favorite albums from the last few years.

The musical intro to the album is “Song For Barbara Payton” full of soulful vocals and harmonies accompanied by whirling synths and organs. The title track “We Will Always Love You” featuring Blood Orange has a catchy bass with layers of vocals and spoken word tracks all while intricate piano arpeggios fade in and out.

“The Divine Chord” featuring MGMT and Johnny Marr is a fun upbeat track. There are a lot of disco elements underneath the chimes and layered swirling effects. The attention to detail is what always keeps me coming back to their music. The crackling vinyl and countless samples that are layered just create so much depth.

Every time I listen to this song I hear something new.

“Interstellar Love” featuring Leon Bridges is an upbeat indie rock track. The chorus uses a sample from the Alan Parsons project Eye in the Sky. It always amazes me how well they can create something that sounds completely different than its original use. I really like the wailing guitars that sound like they are an ambulance off in the distance driving by.

In the track “Reflecting Light” they cleverly chop up vocals of Vashti Bunyan and restructure them into new melodies and meaning. I think my favorite part of the track is the symphony samples that sound like they are just slightly warped by a stop tape effect. There is some clever play on words throughout the lyrics that always makes me smile.

The piano in “Always Black” featuring Pink Siifu is absolutely gorgeous. The sampled female vocals of Azimuth compliment Pink Siifu’s rapping well as it goes back and forth. One of my favorite songs of the album “Running Red Lights'' features Rivers Cuomo and Pink Siifu. This song has such a catchy chorus don’t be surprised when it’s stuck in your head.

Of all the songs on WWALY “Born To Lose” reminds me of their first album the most. The layers of strings constantly being manipulated mashed up with the disco samples is so wonderfully balanced.

There is a constant bombardment of samples that blur together seamlessly while we are treated to a driving beat and bass.

“Music Is The Light” featuring Cornelius and Kelly Morgan is such a trip hop track that sounds like a bunch of random guitar sounds that slowly mold together when the beat comes in. The vocals are layered in a way that they sound haunting, strange, and beautiful all at once.

The pads throughout almost sound like sad ghosts contributing to the haunting feeling that the song as a whole gives off.

There are a handful of other tracks that are purely transitions throughout the album. They add a lot to the different themes that occur in multiple songs. It’s just another reason I love listening to The Avalanches so much. After listening to the album so many times, I can say I am an even bigger fan. I can’t wait for the day that bands can start touring again safely so I can see it performed live.

For the full review, see the online version!

“We Go On” featuring Cola Boyy and Mick Jones is a massive tune.

The first thing you will recognize is Karen Carpenter singing the title repeatedly. The bouncing square bassline and horn arpeggios make the song so fun and upbeat. The rapping and spoken word layered on top of the singing completes the song perfectly.

“Until Daylight Comes” featuring Tricky is an R&B track with a wonderful blend of haunting pads, bells, and reversed samples that creates some beautiful transitions. Tracks like this feel more cinematic with all the imagery they create with samples and sound effects.

My favorite track of the album is “Music Makes Me High.” It is such a fun disco song. Every time I listen to it I have to dance or bob my head if I’m sitting down. When it’s safe to Dj out again this will be a song I regularly play.

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Publisher's letter

From Our Publisher, DJ Doran: Whew! We made it through 2020 and here we are in the beginning of 2021. A new year, a new sense of optimism and opportunity and a new direction. 2020 had many challenges, but it also presented opportunities for those that were ready. We acquired (3) new LGBTQ+ media assets (echo Magazine, Phoenix) (Out & About Magazine, Nashville), (CAMP Magazine, Kansas City) and launched (OUTvoices, Chicago). We developed and launched (2) new industry associations, The Aequalitas Content Creators Association and the Gay Travel Business Network and we are far from being done.

communities they serve as we increase our national OUTvoice.

Each local media and members of OUTvoices will add their voice to our growing national OUTvoices network. OUTvoices “bureaus” will be able to share content with each other allowing access to a much larger audience. A new OUTvoices.us website (Going live April 2nd) will reflect an LGBTQ+ website that offers content from the whole spectrum of our community, not just from the gay male perspective. The .us extension for the website makes a bold and clear statement that OUTvoices is about US, ALL of US.

We currently have (3) LGBTQ+ media properties in the acquisition pipeline for 2021 and there are more in various stages of negotiation and are on track to launch the first ever 24/7 LGBTQ+ internetbased Talk Radio Station aptly named OUTvoices Radio in March.

We will also be rolling out our OUTvoices TV YouTube Channel in May featuring original content such as the Gaycation Travel Show w/Ravi Roth and the Gay Gourmet cooking show w/Chefs Art Smith and Joe Morales and much more.

New initiatives on the OUTvoices Network will include content that speaks to our Transgender, Lesbian, and Queer audiences and much more.

2021 will also see BIG changes coming to all of our individual brands.

As we continue to unify our voices and our media assets, one of the biggest changes happening will be the name changes. Beginning April 2nd (Because nobody wants to announce something on April 1st). Echo Magazine will become (OUTvoices Phoenix), Out & About Nashville will become (OUTvoices Nashville) and CAMP Magazine will become (OUTvoices Kansas City).

Our strategy has been and is a simple one. To create a network of local LGBTQ+ media that maintains a relationship with the

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As we continue our policy of supporting LGBTQ+ media we will offer ALL LGBTQ+ websites that are part of the OUTvoices Network access to OUTvoices Radio and all of the programming contained therein for 24/7 LGBTQ+ talk radio, and they will also be able to broadcast all of our original OUTvoices video content on their digital platforms, all at no cost.

“A rising tide lifts all boats”. As small to medium sized websites continue to be overlooked by major brands and agencies, we are creating a FREE network where others can join with us to change an industry squeak to a roar. We can add all of our small reaches and audiences to a single point, OUTvoices.us to get a piece of the digital advertising pie. Whereas many blue-chip advertisers would not normally consider advertising on our individual websites, they will not be able to ignore the combined audience and voice of our membership.

Publisher's letter While others may beat the drum of impending doom and gloom for LGBTQ+ media, I see opportunities to unify and become stronger, to evolve and grow, to reinvent ourselves and become indispensable.

I see the opportunity to not only survive, but thrive in an evolving media landscape.

It may be true that parts of our media like print are struggling, but I don’t believe it’s on its death bed, not by a long shot. The market it telling us what it wants and needs and we need to listen and pay attention. Print publishing is here to stay, period, but it’s relationship to advertisers is changing.

Whereas print used to be the lead entrée for advertisers and digital offerings were the “added value” that is now changed. Digital content has become the lead platform for many advertisers and print has become the “added value”.

Aequalitas Media recognizes this and we have led the way in the transition from print to digital in 2020 and will continue to do so in the future. 2021 will still have its challenges, but it will also have an abundance of opportunity. These latest changes reflect our dedication and commitment to the survivability of legacy and nonlegacy publications and will continue to preach the importance of a vibrant, healthy and locally focused LGBTQ+ media.

Change can be scary, I know, but change can also be reinvigorating and exciting. The name of the publication may change but our history will not, our relationship to our audience will not and our dedication and commitment to journalistic excellence will not.

I am looking ahead to a brighter future as we focus forward and continue to re-invent ourselves to better reflect the needs and wants of our evolving sophisticated audience.

I hope you will stay with us and share the journey toward an exciting future as we continue to transition into a unified, stronger new brand, OUTvoices.

DJ

Your hometown pharmacy no matter where your home is.

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Lifestyle

Celebrating Monica Roberts Be it trans issues, womanism, activism, self-love, being a true leader, I learned so much from Monica and evolved exponentially because of her influence and example. Needless to say I was truly honored and humbled when I was invited to pen a few guest posts for Transgriot on more than a few occasions. One of the kindest gifts I ever received was when I logged on Transgriot to find a post where Monica congratulated me on the release of my sophomore novel, West of Sunset, and promoted it on her platform.

A Transgriot Tribute Dennis R. Upkins

I think a hero is any person really intent on making this a better place for all people.

—Maya Angelou For many, 2020 was a tumultuous year to put it mildly. It certainly didn’t lack for tragedy and loss.

On a personal note, the biggest loss for me was the passing of the incredible and extraordinary Monica Roberts.

I've said it before, I'll say it now, and I'll say it again many times later. There have been a number of us who have come up through the equal rights activism ranks. Monica Roberts, without question, was the best of all of us. The Transgriot founder and publisher was the epitome of beauty, wisdom, class, and grace. To the world at large, she was a leader, educator, pioneer, award winning activist, superheroine, the personification of #BlackGirlMagic and #BlackTransExcellence. For me, Monica was also a mentor, a role model, and family.

I first met Monica on the comment boards of Jasmyne Cannick’s website. Outspoken and unapologetic in calling out the racism, transphobia, privilege, antiblackness and toxicity of the “gay community,” Ms. Cannick, Monica, myself, Rod McCullom and a few others found ourselves in the trenches and were regular targets for attacks, harassment and even threats from white fauxgressives. Of course after series of ass kickings (online and in real life) later, when all was said and done, truth and history vindicated us—we were the last ones standing. As Monica and I bonded, I was introduced to Transgriot and became a huge fan of her writing and the woman herself.

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But that was Monica. She not only fought tirelessly against systemic oppression but she also took every opportunity to celebrate the descendants and legacy of the African Diaspora, people of color, her TLGBQ siblings, and minorities in general. For some, social justice is an activity, for champions like Monica, being a freedom fighter was who she was. When a young woman in Houston was seeking to transition and didn’t know where to begin in terms of seeking resources, I DM’ed Moni and within minutes she had an entire list for me to pass along to my friend. Moni never passed on a chance to help those in need.

Transgriot was a game-changer and provided a much needed voice for those who are often erased and silenced. Suffice it to say, I was all too happy to celebrate both Monica and the 10-year anniversary of the groundbreaking website with a 2016 interview for Black Excellence Month.

My fondest memories of Monica weren’t limited to social justice.

It was no secret that as a native Houstonian, Monica was a very proud Texan and a huge football fan. She had more than a few choice words for the traitorous Houston Oilers when they defected and became the Tennessee Titans. I, on the other hand, have a huge disdain for the NFL in general. And the only Titans you will ever catch me tuning in for is the live action DC Comics superhero series. However, anytime the Titans faced off against any team from Texas, I became an honorary Tennessee Titans fan and

Celebrating Monica Roberts

Lifestyle

an NFL expert just so I could tease and troll Moni. But given the Tennessee Titans record with each passing season, it’s clear that Monica continues to get the last laugh.

For us, Thursdays were Shondays as we were both huge fans of all things Shonda Rhimes, be it Scandal, How To Get Away With Murder and even the criminally underrated The Catch. She and I spent hours discussing our not-so-guilty pleasures, the VH1 dramas Single Ladies and Hit The Floor. As Monica’s resident comic book geek, I was all too happy to introduce her to Black Panther, Princess Shuri specifically, and all things Wakanda. Oddly enough Monica joined the ancestors last fall, a few weeks after BP star Chadwick Boseman’s passing.

To date I haven’t been able to process her passing. It feels like coming to the realization that you’ve lost a limb or you’re walking around with a gaping hole in your chest. Some days are better than others. But there are still times where it’s all I can do not to curl up in a corner and shut down.

My longtime buddy Kirk Boxleitner stated it best, “In addition to her great achievements, it was always clear in your interactions how much you both meant to one another and respected the hell out of each other.”

Since news of her death, not a day has passed that a comment or a post of hers hasn’t appeared in my social media memories. It’s bittersweet in many respects. In some regards it’s a grim reminder that she’s gone. At the same time, it’s a gentle reminder that a part of her is still here with us.

Monica’s A1Day1, Dee Dee Watters, is continuing Moni’s legacy by gathering and amplifying the voices and works of the next generation of Transgriots.

As I discussed with Fallon Fox, I plan to honor Moni by doubling my efforts to be the best possible advocate I can be for my trans and gender nonbinary siblings. I know I won’t always get it right, but I’ll do my best. I don’t expect anyone to take me at my word alone. I prefer to be about that action anyway.

Rest in power, Monica. Thank you for everything and God bless.

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The Special Shelf

Queer +Japan

Together Together

Jason Shawhan

Right at the end of January, tucked away in the Sundance Film Festival’s offerings, something snuck up on me. Even now, as the community dances a weird combination of forward and backward steps in the baroque dance of civil rights and social acceptance, it’s hard to stop and catch a breath. There’s always some fundamentalist or homophobe trying to unknit every stitch in the social fabric, so there’s barely any time to appreciate victories won in the battle for equality and representation. Which makes this low-key platonic romantic comedy Together Together (coming later this year from Bleecker Street Films) such a pleasant find—like a particularly delicious candy plucked from what you fear is an already plundered Whitman’s Sampler. Writer/Director Nikole Beckwith has pulled off a major achievement, because any time a film this genial and unthreatening can get its targeted (mainstream) audience to rethink some of their prejudices about family, that’s a good thing.

Anna (Patti Harrison) has found a pretty good gig as a surrogate for Matt (Ed Helms, of The Office and The Hangovers). He’s a retired app developer who always wanted to start a family, she’s looking to bankroll a Master’s degree, and between the two of them, there’s going to be an interesting kid brought into the world in the quirkiest of circumstances. To a certain extent, Together Together could almost be a Lifetime film; that’s how easy and pleasant it is.

But it’s also going to rewire some synapses in a way that is going to benefit society (and the queer community) in the future, and not just because of a scathingly sage two-scene turn from modern comic genius Julio Torres (Los Espookys, My Favorite Shapes, SNL).

Harrison’s is a performance for the ages, building on the work she’s put in on Shrill, Search Party, and I Think You Should Leave and creating a portrait of an expectant mother unlike any of the millions of pregnant moms we’ve seen in the movies before.

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I’m also in awe of filmmaker Graham Kolbeins’ documentary Queer Japan (streaming on Video On Demand and available on DVD and Blu-ray from Altered Innocence), because it does something I wouldn’t have imagined possible. Working in the idiom of the queer experience in Japan, there’s hardly an issue confronting the LGBTQIA community that isn’t addressed in some capacity—and that’s a staggering achievement. If you’ve ever been part of any sort of civic action community, or activist collective, or even a writer’s workshop, you are well acquainted with how stressful it can be to find equity amongst the many issues that come from gathering a group of folk together.

Sexual health and expression, innovative and transgressive art (enby artist Saeborg and their work with the Department H fetishtravaganza is going to occupy your mind for a while after seeing this film), the history of HIV/AIDS education and awareness, bar culture and its place, the oppressive legal battles that the Japanese trans* community are facing, the evolution of the sometime contentious relationship between the Shibuya lesbian and transmasc populations, the corporatization of pride, youth outreach, winning snarky battles against homophobes in public forums – every time you think “this film is doing an amazingly comprehensive job at covering the community’s issues,” along comes another pivot and you’re left stunned. If Kolbeins ever tires of filmmaking, I would happily welcome their work as a community organizer, because the many bases of the queer community get covered.

Three plus two equals family

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Cover Article

The

Lil ac

Experience James Grady

Ravanna-Michelle E. Menendez Wants To Change the Playing Field For Trans People

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The Lilac Experience

Cover Article

March 31 is International Transgender Day of Visibility—an annual event dedicated to celebrating transgender people and raising awareness of discrimination faced by transgender people worldwide, as well as a celebration of their contributions to society.

Nashville, like many larger cities, has a growing population of out trans people, and is growing its ability to provide necessary care and services for this community. Likewise, a whole new generation of trans activists and allies are coming up through the ranks to ensure progress continues.

This month, Vidalia Anne Gentry sat down with Ravanna-Michelle E. Menendez, a Diversity & Inclusion Strategist, trans activist and actress, for her Here & Queer podcast, and we thought that Ravanna’s story was so inspiring, that we wanted to hear more about her life and the work that she’s preparing to embark on, after building on from her past role in Lyft’s Diversity & Inclusion/ Recruiting department, as well as leading Lyft Nashville’s Employee Resource Group dedicated to the LGBTQ+ community during her time at the company.

Asked about her background, Ravanna said, “I grew up in a very conservative, religious and abusive household (due in large part to my step-father) where I understood from a very early age that me being who I am was seen as being wrong, evil and of the devil.”

Ravanna was acutely aware of how wrong she was supposed to feel about her identity. But she also thought, “I know with every fiber of my being that this isn't something that can be changed. I spent so many nights trying to pray it away… One of the prayers that I most asked God was, “Please just let me wake up as a girl, please just let me wake up the way I'm supposed to be, so it doesn't have to be wrong’.”

"My message to my trans community and to the world that's watching - From tech, to Hollywood, to even the White House, we belong, we matter and our journeys towards success and representation at the table is not just possible—it's imperative."

“I spent a really large portion of my childhood knowing that when I actually did transition, that it was going to hurt my family, and my relationship with my family…”

When her family found out that she was attracted to men, however, they hammered Ravanna with religion. And at sixteen, her world was turned so upside down that she ultimately felt like there was nothing she could do. So when they forced her to repent, she thought, “You're an actress. Treat it like an act. Okay, treat it like an act. And so I went along with it. That Sunday, they brought me to my aunt’s Pentecostal church. They made me go up to the altar when everyone else was going up there to pray… They fed lines to me to say, asking that God take my evil desires and nature away from me.

They put their hands on me and prayed in tongue. And then we went out to Cheddars for lunch afterwards, where my uncle nudged me to look at the waitress and say, ‘She's pretty hot looking right?’

Just magically cured.”

But it didn’t stop there. Ravanna was pulled from school and “homeschooled” to keep her away from her affirming friends. “They literally printed out Bible scriptures and posted it on every inch of my wall in my bedroom, they took the computer away from me,

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Cover Article

The Lilac Experience

they took the lock off my door… They went through my phone, all of my technology. I felt trapped in a tower with my own thoughts.”

At that point, suicide presented itself as her only way out. Thankfully, the attempt failed, and ultimately Ravanna emerged with a renewed sense of purpose, to work her way out of the situation she found herself in. There would be setbacks—for instance she discovered her parents weren’t formally homeschooling through an accredited program, so on paper she looked like a high school dropout.

She threw herself into working toward her GED and working jobs to free herself. She told herself, “If you want to get out of this house, you need to get up and get a job.”

It wasn’t until she was 21 that she would get the job at Lyft that would finally free her. “That was when I was able to move into my first apartment. And that was when I really started to live, because I didn't have to live in the confinement of abuse and others’ need to repress me. And that's when I was like, I can't wait until I'm 50 to transition.”

“I decided at 22 that I needed to take steps to move forward with transitioning, so I immediately started in with laser hair removal.

And it took a good hot minute, you know, to really get that taken care of. But once I actually got to that point, there was no stopping me. I felt on top of the fucking world!

“I very much publicly went through my transition at Lyft. You know, I was the only trans woman there in Nashville, in that office, that was trans. It was very much an experience for me and also for everyone else around me.”

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During that process, she discovered that while Lyft was a very affirming company, her insurance only covered hormones and “bottom surgery”. While hormones are commonly used, bottom surgery is much more rarely utilized in transition than say top surgery or other procedures.

Ravanna’s primary goal, for instance, was facial feminization surgery (FFS)—the common out-of-pocket cost, uninsured, can be $60-$80,000. “The ffs was very necessary for me, my own mental health. And of course, obviously, if you decide that you want to get, you know, breast implants as well… I certainly have participated in that lovely little surgery!”

At Lyft, she saw the other great things that the company was doing, especially with their employee resource group (ERG), for trans people and local communities. “But I was like, what are we doing for our own employees? After the Trump administration had issued the action to remove transgender troops from the military, they held a therapy session for the LGBTQ+ ERG. When they asked for questions, Ravanna was stuck on the idea that while the company couldn’t address these big national questions, there were things they could do for the people in their company.

“So I brought it straight to the founder's face. And I said, I think what you're doing is fantastic, but I want to know what you're able to do for actual trans employees that are working for you. Because the coverage that we have for trans inclusive insurance is not enough. And, you know, that wasn't something that they were expecting, right?”

The Lilac Experience "Not being political and not speaking out against injustice and bigoted policies in our country isn't an option for trans people when there is a large percentage of our country that still views us and our basic human rights as ineligible and undeserving."

Ravanna-Michelle E. Menendez “He was very generous about it. And he was like, ‘Well, I would love to hear from you. What can we do to better support trans employees?’ Let’s get in touch so we can learn and address this together. And that's why having somebody like me at the table is so important. Because if you don't have anybody to start these conversations, they're not going to be had! That really gave me the platform to then lay out everything that we needed.”

“There's something called the WPATH (World Professional Association for Transgender Health) guidelines, which lay out as medically necessary the procedures that people need to transition, be it FFS, breast implants, hormones, bottom surgery, any kind of thing like that. WPATH makes it clear these are not cosmetic” “I really pushed for that, along with other trans employees at Lyft.

And eventually, in the next year, it was included. And I'm very proud of the work that I did with that, because I started that conversation.

For generations to come, for whoever works at Lyft that's trans, they're going to be able to get the surgeries that they need. And that to me, is honestly one of the biggest achievements I look to when I needed a moment of ‘you’re doing good kid!’”

“One of the things that I'm really focusing on this year is continuing that work by putting together a project I’m calling the Lilac Experience.”

“It’s very much a three-pillar program. I hope to find others willing to put their own time into working alongside me in order to help other trans people out, and also offer a bridge for ally-ship that's not superficial.”

Cover Article

“Number one for me is replicating what we did at Lyft—I want to help drive conversations with CEOs and others leading the major companies around us to encourage them to adopt the WPATH guidelines into their benefits package, and also to publicly announced that they're doing it to encourage industry peers to do the same, as well as make a public commitment to maintain a minimum 1.5% population of trans people hired within their company.”

“That's really the top tier of the work that I will personally be doing is driving those conversations, and also encouraging trans people in their own organizations to speak up to their CEOs and management, and HR, to demand the same respect as I did.”

“The second and third tier Is working with recruiters, willing to give their time to help place trans people with companies that offer trans-inclusive health benefits, and help provide resume/interview tips… The more companies we can convince to adopt WPATH guidelines, the more opportunities there will be. Hooking trans people up with really good health benefits, better pay, etc., is key to freeing them from the circumstances that hold them back in life—as in my own experience. This will drive down the suicide numbers, it's going to drive down the population of trans people that are out on the streets, and help deal with other social issues.”

“I’m working towards launching a Lilac Experience website, that will eventually be a one stop shop for finding all of the local trans friendly options across the US for safe housing, jobs with trans inclusive healthcare, as well as resources for local surgeons, therapists, doctors—all of that jazz!”

“I want this to be a community initiative. I want to create an opportunity for all of us to lead with allyship, generosity and basic human kindness towards a community that has greatly been served discrimination, hate crimes and denied opportunities in career and finances in the past. Now is the time to step up, wake up and demand change for a better tomorrow, and I strongly believe that this is a step in that direction to uplifting the trans community.”

“People will blindly announce they’re an ally without thinking that there's even any work that comes with it. Being an ally is a responsibility, recognizing that your actions or lack of actions can define somebody else's success, and also their way of life. I’m asking people to be true allies by showing up for their trans neighbors and reaching out to me to find out what they can do to help this movement. Let's meet this opportunity in history with leadership, hard work and diligence towards building a better, more accepting future for all of the youth to come. ”

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Relationship

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Being in a Couple During a Pandemic

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Relationship

February 2021

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Lifestyle

My Experience Seeking

‘Top Surgery’ in Nashville

Lee Hatcher For the first 10 years of my life, I feared puberty; I had nightmares about growing breasts and becoming a woman, oftentimes waking up just to cry real tears over the inexorable reality of my situation. Back then I didn't have terms like gender dysphoria or transgender to understand what it was I was going through. It was more than a struggle with growing up, and when I did eventually go through puberty as a female, I wanted nothing more than to die.

was after their nurse stopped me at the front door, saying I needed a parent with me for my appointment. In most situations I would have been flattered to be seen as young but unfortunately being treated like I was twelve made the entire experience very unpleasant. It ended with the surgeon telling me I needed to consult my doctor about whether or not I was physically ready for this surgery—specifically whether my breasts were done growing or not.

For nearly 5 years, I binded my chest to make it look flatter. I semi-permanently altered my posture by hunching my shoulders and back so my shirt wouldn't touch my chest. Today though, two weeks post-op from having peri-areolar top surgery, I celebrate a new lease on life, presenting more as the man I am.

After that I stopped going to see those kinds of plastic surgeons and was referred to Vanderbilt. From there, things went much better. At my first appointment, everyone made sure to use my preferred name and pronouns, while also going out of their way to make sure I was comfortable. My new surgeon, Dr. Al Kassis, knew exactly what kind of surgery I was talking about when I told him what I wanted and was great about making me understand his process.

I left feeling extremely happy and excited by the prospect of finally being one step closer in the process.

Coming from a smaller Tennessee town, the process of finding a surgeon who would perform this surgery (and having it not cost an arm and a leg) proved tough.

I had no clue where to go—all of the famous top surgeons were in Florida or Pennsylvania. My initial thought was to see plastic surgeons at clinics who, while they may not have much experience with transgender clients, had the technical skills to do what I wanted.

So I made appointments with Nashville plastic surgeons with ritzy clinics that specialized in things like mommy makeovers. Bad move. At one awful appointment, after having explained I had been socially transitioned for 5 years and medically for 1, a surgeon asked me if I was sure I had finished puberty yet. That 18

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I waited a few months for my insurance to be processed, get my pre-op appointment and for my surgery date to be finalized. On the day of my surgery, they were able to start over an hour earlier than expected.

All of my nurses and doctors were friendly and professional; both of my nurses assured me I was in great hands and that they knew I would be thrilled by Dr. Al Kassis's work when it was over.

Upon first seeing my bare chest immediately after surgery, I wasn’t so sure. I was on a lot of drugs and very disoriented. It was

My Experience Seeking ‘Top Surgery’ in Nashville

Lifestyle

not until a few weeks later, at my post-op appointment, that I actually got a clear idea of what I now looked like. And boy, I was fucking thrilled.

Yes I was bruised and swollen, but I was also no longer mentally fighting what I saw in the mirror. I will have virtually no scarring thanks to Dr. Al Kassis and can be more confident in my everyday life.

When asked about his practice he said: “At Vanderbilt University Medical Center, we are committed to providing genderaffirming care, including a comprehensive range of surgical options. We deeply understand that transgender people have historically had limited access to care, and we have made significant investments to increase access for patients in Tennessee and throughout the Southeast. While gender-affirming procedures can be lifesaving, we also know care given by our staff can set patients up for positive, long-term health outcomes. We have a standard of care that prioritizes communication, dignity, and the well-being of our patients.

“I feel honored to work with an outstanding team focused on a comprehensive approach to patient care. Our patients report positive impacts on the mental, emotional, physical, and overall quality of life following genderaffirming procedures.

“While we take great pride in the work we are doing today, we are already looking to increase the scope of our services over time. Vanderbilt seeks to advance health equity for transgender patients with world-class coordinated care, innovative research, and critical education for future generations of providers.”

At my last appointment with him, after thanking him profusely for what he had done for me, he thanked me and asked me to share his work with others. A lot of people in the South have no clue where to start with this kind of process—I know I was clueless. It’s difficult and I hope that by sharing my story, it will give the community more knowledge and resources within Tennessee.

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Book review

Books for Trans Visibility Day

My Reading List Lee Hatcher For Trans Visibility Day this year, March 31, 2021, I set out to make a list of books that I want to read that dealt with what it means to be transgender. I wanted the focus of this list to be informative about trans issues and politics, while also exploring transgender life throughout history. That being said, the list also includes some more leisurely reads that are great insights into someone's specific experience 1.

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Black on Both Sides: A Racial History of Trans Identity by C. Riley Snorton, a transgender scholar, author, and activist, offering an incredible insight to how Black people pioneered being out as transgender. Following Black History Month, I find it important to include this in-depth account of Black transgender figures from the United States. Often, white people, or in this case white transgender people, ignore the strides made by people of color, and this book exemplifies those prominent transgender people of color who advocated for trans identity. It’s also a great source and reference for historical events that took place that could help readers with awareness and understanding of the trans community.

My next book may not seem that important to what this list aims at but I think it is highly important to include. I Am Jazz, by Jazz Jennings and Jessica Herthel, is a children’s book aimed at informing and promoting inclusion between the transgender community and cisgender people. The book is highly controversial, earning a spot on the 100 most banned books list, as it is aimed at educating small children about trans issues. However, having this positive conversation and awareness at a young age is vital; not only does it help teach about gender identity, but it can allow children to have better insight to themselves. I include if for all these reasons, but also because it is a nice, fun and short read with a trans author.

The young adult novel, Felix Ever After, by Kacen Callender is something I think will fit perfectly on my bookshelf! The description is enticing, an enthralling teenage story about the trials and tribulations of a black, queer, transgender kid who falls into a quasi-love triangle. It encompasses all the realness of what identity means, which is why I put it so high on my list. Felix Ever After also looks like the perfect combination of entertaining writing, while keeping a level of self-awareness that makes it accurately informative of real-life situations transgender people can find themselves in.

For a quick, firsthand perspective of what being gender noncoforming/nonbinary looks and feels like, I choose to include Alok Vaid-Menon’s pocketbook Beyond the Gender Binary. The book's aim is to look Beyond the Gender Binary by conceptualizing gender in full color, not just in terms of male or female. It also tackles the topic of gender as a social construct and the oppression of those identifying as transgender or nonbinary today. Reviews say that it deconstructs Western ideals of gender and the expectations that come along with that, while remaining incredibly personal and relatable.

Overall, this short, inspiring book appears to be a great candidate to read and reflect upon this month.

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Books for Trans Visibility Day

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Book review

To appease my need for something with dark humor, I look to Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars: A Dangerous Trans Girl's Confabulous Memoir by Kai Cheng Thon for an outlet.

Although it is a work of fiction, Kai writes real circumstances in a mystical, magical world that makes you love the fierce, Asian, transgender woman that is the main character. I have never seen anything like this, which makes it incredibly intriguing.

It’s uniqueness in humor and storytelling adds to its already flamboyant aesthetic which gives it a spot on my list—not to mention I can't wait to find out what a fictional memoir is like.

This next book is a 2015 Stonewall Honor book. Susan Kuklin’s Beyond Magenta: Transgender Teens Speak Out is a culmination of work with first hand experiences and perspective from transgender and nonbinary teens taken from interviews the author did with them. Based on its cover it seems geared towards those who may not have any real life experience with transgender people; that would make this a great book to refer to if you're in the community and want to have discussions with people who are not or just might not be aware. Either way, it seems to be an informative book that a lot of dedication went into making.

Last but certainly not least, is Redefining Realness: My Path to Womanhood, Identity, Love, and So Much More by Janet Mock.

It is her personal account of what her journey as a transgender woman looked like growing up in the cisgender world. Her memoir follows all important aspects of her life: struggling in early childhood to understand who she was, all the way to her finding love in a world that made her think she was unlovable.

Redefining Realness appears to be the perfect, relatable read for transgender people and a great resource for those who want to learn more from a first person perspective. She seems to her story with all the hairy details in a beautiful way and for that reason it tops off my list.

Lee Hatcher is a trans man from Nashville, currently a student at New York University. outandaboutnashville.com

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Photo by Shopify Partners from Burst (steaks-oil-salt-knife-and-a-cutting-board)

C u tting B oa rd s : W ood , P las tic , G las s , & B e y ond Joe Morales I wasn’t sure how I wanted to introduce myself considering this is going to be a new monthly column. I was going to jump in feet first and give you some amazing recipes but also thought maybe I should simply start with the basics.

By basics, I mean what tools to use, what tricks are out there, what do you REALLY need in order to be a good, or better, cook.

It’s always important to use the right tool for the job. So what are you cutting on? The first discussion is going to be about cutting boards. I know, it doesn’t seem that would be a likely place to start, but trust me, this is going to be just as important as your knives (next article).

Cutting boards come in several different materials: stone, glass, wood, and plastic.

Stone Cutting Boards Stone cutting boards are beautiful, heavy, and expensive. I really only use these for charcuterie boards or large serving platters.

You can find stone boards in a variety of forms: marble, granite, and slate.

Why you ask? Because stone boards are hard surfaces. It will take one time of chopping vegetables before you will need to sharpen your knife because the stone dulled your blade.

Sure, they’re easy to clean and sanitize but they are hard on knife blades, requiring more frequent sharpening.

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Glass Cutting Boards Glass cutting boards are much more cost effective than stone but are also hard on your knives. They are tempered, lightweight, durable, and you can place them in dishwashers (usually).

You will still have the same issues with dull knives and the benefits of ease of cleaning and sanitizing.

Wood Cutting Boards Wood cutting boards are made from bamboo, walnut, cherry, maple, or a combination of walnut, cherry, and maple.

You have to work a bit harder at keeping them clean but they definitely provide less wear and tear on your knives. Wooden boards are prone to knife cuts, dents but are forgiving.

Unlike marble or glass cutting boards, you CANNOT place wood cutting boards in the dishwasher. It also goes without saying, you cannot place them in the oven to dry either.

Trust me, someone’s done that.

The easiest way to clean the cutting board is to use soap and water. To rid the board of smells and stains, use a lemon cut in half with some kosher salt and rub it on the surface of the wood, then rinse. After washing, towel dry the excess water and set the board standing up or on an angle to dry thoroughly.

Every once in a while it is necessary to oil the board so it isn’t stripped of its natural oils and prolongs its life. Make sure you use food grade mineral oil or creams.

It’s more work but in the long run it will save you money on knife replacement.

Plastic Cutting Boards You can find plastic cutting boards in just about every restaurant kitchen around the world. Why? Because they are easy to use, clean, and store. All they have to do is run them through the industrial sprayer and dishwasher where they get cleaned and sanitized in one shot.

Cutting boards made of plastic are prone to knife cuts just like wood but last quite a bit longer. They come in several different types of plastic too. You can purchase the thin foldable “boards,” or you can go with a ¼ inch to ½ inch thick plastic. You would think that all plastic is created equal but it isn’t. There are harder plastic boards and there are softer plastic ones. It’s all about your preference, but I tend to lean toward the softer plastic ones.

Best part, you can rinse them off and toss them in the dishwasher and run them with the rest of your dishes.

Cutting Boards: Wood, Plastic, Glass, & Beyond

Joe Eats the World

It’s always important to use the right tool for the

job.

My Recommendation

Photo by Kevin Doran on Unsplash

As a professional chef, I use and recommend wooden and plastic cutting boards. I have both at home and they get equal use...well, almost. I tend to favor the wood cutting board. Just my personal preference.

I don’t ever use stone or glass (for cutting); I strictly use wood and plastic. I usually catch my husband using just the granite counter and I always ask if he is using a cutting board...Also, DON’T use your countertop as a cutting board. This is why I don’t allow him to use my good chef knives, which we’ll cover next time.

I don’t recommend using the thin folding plastic boards. While they seem convenient, over time they warp and never lay flat. They are also flimsy and can get holds in them or stab marks. Trust me, that happens too.

Photo by Bonnie Kittle on Unsplash

You can find cutting boards in all shapes and sizes, pick the one that fits your needs.

Professional tip: to keep your cutting board from sliding around while using it, wet some paper towels or a tea towel, wring out the excess water, place it on the counter and put your cutting board on top of it. This will keep your cutting board in place and stop the extra sliding around which leads to injury.

JOE EATS WORLD Joe Morales is a passionate traveler, trained chef, and culinary instructor. When he isn't off exploring the world, you can find him at home with his husband DJ and dog Oliver. Joe spends a lot of time in the kitchen working on his latest recipes. You can read more about Joe's easy to follow recipes and how to's by visiting his website, Joe Eats World (joeeatsworld.com). You can also follow him on instagram at JoeEatsWorld1 and also on Facebook at JoeEatsWorld.

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