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OCELOT THE

The Computers take a byte out of Ocelotshire We chat to the blues/punk/hardcore band on page 38 Our man in iraq p6

ISSUE NO: 97

JULY 2014

FREE Cornbury Festival p36

Service with a smile? p15


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Follow Ocelot Mag on Facebook and Twitter @ocelotmag

What’s in your Ocelot?

For Starters p4

Jamie Hill

Luke Coleman; The Goat; Register to Vote

Food and Drink p13

Brewery Bird; Pan of Mystery; Dave for all Seasons

Arts and Culture p25

Cowley Road Carnival; Are you Talking to Me?

The Music section p36

Arts & Culture

Cowley Road Carnival p30

ways that you can help what is turning into a huge humanitarian crisis. It’s not often that we have one of our writers caught up in a major news event and all we can say is please stay safe Luke. Our thoughts are with you.

Food and Drink

feature on the situation in Iraq. For the past year we’ve had a columnist called Luke Coleman who has been reporting to us from the north of the country. If you’ve watched the news at any point over the last couple of weeks you’ll have seen that it’s all kicking off over there. For this month Luke gives us a special report about what it’s like to live in a warzone with the world’s media turning up on the doorstep with flak jackets in tow. It’s a huge crisis with attrocities only just coming to our attention. It’s pretty scary stuff. Hopefully we’ll be able to give you an insight into the situation and also give you various numbers and

For Starters

This is a packed issue. Not least because we’ve got a pretty damn good interview with the amazing band The Computers who are coming to Swindon this month. We like these guys. They know how to dress and they know how to have a bit of a laugh. There’s also a whole lot of other stuff going on. We have special reports on Cowley Road Carnival, Pewsey Music Festival and Cornbury Festival. On top of all that we’ve got all of our usual goodies like Bassett Rivers, Agony Girl, The Goat, Dave for All Seasons (love that name) and Twisted Peel. But on a more serious note we will also be including a special

The Computers; Cornbury Festival; Gig Monkey

The List p48

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cat from central and south America.It is also the region’s leading arts and culture magazine letting you know what’s going on and where. The Ocelot has more than 25,000 readers and is delivered to over 700 different venues on the 1st of every month.To be in it - get in touch!

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Editor: Jamie Hill jamie@theocelot.co.uk Contributors: Brewery Bird, John Palmgren, Ed Dyer, Dave Franklin, Agony Girl, David Murphy, Sid Siddle, Mark Muggeridge, Dave Stewart Printers: Advent Colour

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The Goat

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The Goat is our resident grumpy gruff. He’s always bloody moaning. So what has got on The Goat’s ..urm. goat this month? With Michael Bosley taking a well earned rest this month to go on holiday, we thought The Goat should get a bit more space. This comes the edition after The Goat wrote a parody article about UKIP’s Nigel Farage which earnt him a good few very badly spelt complaints from the party faithful. Apparently it was ‘crap’ and ‘The Editor should go and get himself a propa job’. Well, we’ve got one word of advice for the closet racists at the good ship UKIP (cue more complaints) - use Spellcheck! Anyway this month The Goat tackles a group that is a lot more mature than that xenophobic fringe party - Babies. If you pick up any newspaper you get bombarded by articles telling you which group it’s okay to hate today. They range from ‘benefits scroungers’ to ‘tax dodgers’; from ‘hoodies’ to ‘Pointless Celebrities’ (great name for a TV programme by the way). Maybe I’ve been reading the wrong newspapers as nowhere does it mention the worst offenders. The one group who sponge off our society more than any other. In fact they sponge so much that a lot of the time you could even say a sponge is more helpful. At least a sponge keeps you clean. Of course I’m talking about babies. Think about it. They’re so needy. They need help with every function. They can’t even go to the toilet by themselves. How unsanitary is that? Instead they expect you to have to deal with their droppings and then dispose of them whilst trying to hold your nose in case you get a whiff of the vile odour that they have produced. And why do they have to poo in such a variety of different colours? There’s orange, green and black. Isn’t brown good enough for them? They also can’t even eat and drink properly and expect to be fed. They never cook. You never get home and find that your nine-month-old has prepared you a three course meal. No, of course they don’t. They’re lazy like that. Then there’s the sleep deprivation. They subject their slaves... urm I mean parents to stuff that would defy the European Convention of Human Rights. But have you ever seen a baby on trial at The Hague? Of course you haven’t because they’re ‘babies’.

And what’s with the not being able to walk thing for nine to 18 months? Horses, dogs and cats walk within days. It’s just laziness. Pure and simple. They want you to think they can’t do any of these things. But of course they can. They’re probably reading Plato in the 15 minute spaces where they’ve finally let you sleep before deciding that enough’s enough and it’s time to torture mummy and daddy again. And then they smile. And then they laugh. And suddenly they steal your heart and you end up loving them to the day that you die and you will die first. They will make sure of it. They’re crafty like that. Bloody babies. 4


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Luke Coleman: Our

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Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

For Starters

Ocelot columnist Luke lives in the Kurdish city of Erbil in Northern Iraq. He now finds himself caught up

Luke Coleman teaches English to students in the Kurdish city of Erbil in Northern Iraq. He is also a regular contributor to The Ocelot. Over the past few weeks he has seen the impact that the ISIS insurgency is having on his chosen country. Please send help. Off The Grid with Luke Coleman (Our Man in Iraq)

the Shia holy cities of Karbala and Najaf. Kirkuk, on the Kurdish border and eyed avariciously by the Kurdistan Regional Government is today under control of the Peshmerga (literally, Those That Face Death in Kurdish), the only effective army operating in Iraq right now and there are even rumours that the region could gain independence. I had coffee with a friend from Mosul today. He has bought his family to live with friends in Erbil (those not sponsored are having to live in temporary camps outside city limits until they are verified to not be Daash, which is the local name for Isis). He is happy to be here, and I asked him about Mosul. “Everyone is happy”, he said, “because now Iraq army gone. I had six years in Mosul, when I came there from Baghdad. Now Erbil is home.” What about Daash, what are they like? “They don’t hurt people, but Sharia. No good.” This is a fluid situation, that has moved extremely quickly. Only a fool would make strong

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www.lukecoleman.co.uk

June 12 Unless you've gone all Taliban (that's the other lot, but you know) and have started living in a cave, you've no doubt seen that my country of residence has been lit up like a shitty Catherine Wheel, with the undeniable dickstains of ISIS having taken over many cities. I'm writing this on June 12, so I fully expect everything to have changed by the time you read this. After all, on Friday there were reports of people fleeing Mosul, 60 miles up the road. 6 days later, Mosul and Tikrit have come under the control of ISIS, like the province of Anbar before it. Insurgents are moving on Baghdad, surrounding Samara and threatening all manner of shit against 6


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ern Iraq. He now finds himself caught up in a major conflict and calls for people to donate.

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the fuck out of Dodge' and moved to the safety of Kurdistan. And then there are the journalists. So many, many journalists parachuted in for the many, many networks and outlets keen to be across the story. Some of them are great reporters, sensitive to making mistakes. Others are long-term students of Kurdistan or the wider Middle East. Of course, there are some that are clueless. What is happening south of here is horrific. I've never lived so close to such barbaric disregard for life. It's completely alien to me that someone can pick up a machine gun and walk along a line of begging, prostrate men, executing economically. It's fucked up. June 20 As some of you have indicated that a post is appreciated, I'm well, life in Kurdistan doesn't change much. Those of you that asked me when I was home in March, how long I intended to stay, I replied at least this year because I thought 2014 was going to be an important year for my adopted home. Never expected serious, genuine discussions of independence, however. Believe in peace. Other than the usual places like The Red Cross, Christian Aid and Refugees International Luke would recommend donating to the Rise Foundation to help as it directly supports refugees in Erbil. www.therisefoundation.ie

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predictions about the following days, weeks and months. It's all kicking off. But up here, we remain, at the time of writing safe and sound. With a half million more people seeking refuge. HALF A MILLION have fled Mosul, looking for sanctuary in a region already hosting 220,000 Syrian refugees and up to 60,000 other internally displaced people from Anbar. Send help. June 16 We remain safe in Kurdistan. Strange and disquieting times, but this part of Iraq is shielded from the tragic mess to the south of us. One of the many sad things that I've experienced is teaching a corporate lesson this afternoon. Most of the 15 students are from cities fully in the shit right now. You may have heard that utilities have been improved in Mosul since ISIS took over. We had a power cut in Erbil (a regular thing, many generators to cover it) and four or five of the students suggested getting ISIS to run the town. Dark humour in dark times. June 17 Ainkawa, the small Christian town which grew to become a suburb of Erbil in the 1990s, is where I call home. Over the last few days the population has swelled. Christians from Mosul who have family here have come. Arab Christians have, in the vernacular of so many of my worried friends, 'got


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take action. You could be one of around 43,000 Oxford residents who need to re-register so it’s important that you look out for a letter in July that will tell you what you need to do. People who need to re-register at a new property (i.e. they have moved since last year or will go on the register for the first time) will still fill in a “household” form but that will not secure registration as it did in the past. We will send a form to each person added on a household form. It’s on that form that a person will have to give their date of birth and NI number. A person will not be registered for elections until that individual form has been returned, by post or online. There are also people in the area who are not registered to vote at all and so need to join the register to have their say in elections. If you weren’t registered previously, you can register under the new system at www.gov.uk/yourvotematters. Being on the electoral roll not only protects your right to vote but it also is an important part of any credit reference check. To find out more, visit www.gov.uk/yourvotematters

Arts & Culture

The biggest change to the voter registration system in 100 years is taking place this summer. Previously, one form was used for registering everyone who lived at an address, but now every individual is responsible for their own voter registration. To register, you will need to provide a few more details than before, including your National Insurance number and date of birth. These new identifiers have been introduced to help make the electoral register more secure and to reduce electoral fraud. The new system means that for the first time people are now able to register online. Registering online is quick, simple and cost effective and we encourage everyone to do it that way if they can. For this year only the majority of people who are already on the electoral roll in Oxford will be registered automatically under the new system. All councils will carry out a data-matching process with the Department of Work and Pensions in early summer. Where a person’s details (name and address) match they do not need to do anything to remain registered for 2015. We will write out to those people in the summer confirming that they are registered for the next year. However, about a third of electors in Oxford won’t be matched under this system and will need to take action to join the new register. We are writing to people to tell them whether they need to

Food and Drink

The way we register to vote is changing


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For Starters

with Brewery bird

The region’s favourite beer writer

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Cellar Management A brewery can brew the best beer in the world, but if it’s not kept in top notch conditions at the pub, then all that hard work literally goes down the drain. Temperature and line cleanliness is paramount to ensure the beer is just as drinkable at the end of the cask, as it was at the first pint –

Arts & Culture

Beer styles aside, ever wondered why your beer tastes the way it does? We’re all rather more aware of the different ingredients used in the making of cask ale, thanks to the raised profile beer now enjoys both in the media and on the bar. Drinkers are being encouraged by brewers to discern the different and unique tastes available as a result of their tireless experimentation with hops, malts and other not so traditional ingredients such as coconut, orange peel, chilli to name but a few. But these aside, there are other factors which can have just as much impact on how we assess taste and aroma when choosing and enjoying a pint:

poor hygiene can lead to a build-up of bacteria, yeast and other nasties - sour or vinegary notes, may indicate the presence of bacteria, which whilst not hazardous to health, can severely change our opinion of the beer. Glassware You might think glassware is all about marketing, but as soon as the beer is poured, its colour, aroma and taste is altered with every pull from the beer engine as it hits the glass. Our senses take over, anticipation is heightened; we start to imagine how the first sip will taste, how smooth or sharp the beer will feel as it reaches the thousands of taste-buds within our mouths. Glassware shape affects head retention and controls how much of the volatile compounds (hop oils, yeast fermentation etc) escape to form the aroma; dirty glasses, or beer served in the wrong glass can impact both aroma and taste by dampening these volatiles, stopping the true persona of the beer from escaping. Setting Where and when a beer is drunk can hugely affect our enjoyment of the product, and potentially influence our decision on how we make that particular beer choice. Comfort, atmosphere even cleanliness can all have an impact on how good we perceive the beer tastes. Cleanliness is after-all next to Godliness and a perfectly kept, poured and well-presented pint, enjoyed in good company is just about as close to heaven as this beer lover can hope to get.

Food and Drink

Taste the Difference


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pleasant but if the service has been rubbish, adding a few Smarties is not going to help! Which brings me nicely onto the minefield of tipping… A general rule of thumb is 1012.5% or a little more to round it up. Leaving £3.87 smacks of being a little stingy. Of course you are totally entitled to not leave anything if it has really been that bad, but of course you’d have said something to the staff or manager already, right? Something I wasn’t aware of until recently is if a restaurant clearly displays somewhere or tells you as you’re seated, that a service charge is payable, usually 12.5%, you are then obliged to pay that. If the service is dreadful, then speak to the manager and explain why you don’t want to pay but you have entered into an agreement to pay it so are contractually obliged. Having spoken to several restaurants in Oxford, and a few in London, I’m pleased to discover that these tips do generally go direct to the staff themselves. Some places have a tip jar where everything gets divided between all the staff including kitchen staff on a pro rata basis and some keep their own tips from their tables. But what if you pay by credit card and the waiter looks hopefully at you whilst you hit the yes or no key to add a gratuity? Personally I always tip in cash. Again, restaurants are good at getting card tips back to the staff, despite the administrative fee. Apart from one restaurant, which bizarrely keeps 2.5% for “breakages”… That, to me, should be part and parcel of running a restaurant and included in the operating costs.

Food and Drink

A column by Bitten Oxford By Becca Chaplin and picture by Jacqui Thorndyke Having been both sides of the table, working in locations from pubs where a toasted sandwich was the height of gastronomy, to some rather nice restaurants - and eating in them all - I’m well placed to know what constitutes good customer service and what doesn’t. In these days where finances are tight, going out for a meal should be a full experience, it’s no good paying for amazing food if the service is shoddy. We all have bad days but in a service profession like catering, you have to leave that at the door and paste a vaguely realistic smile on along with an attitude that shows you do actually care. After all, the clue is in the name - hospitality. Now for the ranty bit, my do's and don'ts of customer service: Strong perfume or aftershave men, you are just as guilty as ladies, a waft of Lynx is just as offensive as half a bottle of Davidoff. Keep it subtle, we want to smell our food! Hair, if it’s long, tie it back (and properly, not with wispy tendrils floating around your face and wafting into my soup) Oh and facial hair needs to be neat and tidy too. Remember to check it before going out on the floor if you’ve just eaten…..

Nails, short and manicured please. If you’re wearing nail polish, take it off as soon as it starts to chip. I don’t want random flakes of Vampire Red in my salad. Dress smart – clothes with stains on are an absolute no-no. Rediscover that strange gadget known as an iron. Clean shoes too. Be attentive, but not intrusive. Crouching down at the table to talk to customers is silly and irritates me greatly. Same as physical contact. I’m paying you to bring me food, not be my new best friend and I certainly don’t want a hand in the small of my back ushering me to my seat. I also don’t want to be thinking about that hand patting me on my shoulder, how many other shoulders it’s patted and if any of those other shoulders have dandruff or nits or worse. Just don’t touch me unless I’m choking. Bring tap water automatically. Iced, with clean glasses. If we want bottled, we’ll order it. And, this is a big one for Oxford especially – if the water is in a bottle make sure you know if it’s been filtered or not. The ridiculous amounts of limescale in our water can upset a lot of people’s tummies so has to be filtered. Telling them it is filtered when it’s not can get very messy. DO NOT EVER clear plates until EVERYONE has finished eating. EVER. If you have a slow eater, like we have on the Bitten team, it makes them feel even slower and rushed. Let us dine and digest at our own speed, thanks If you absolutely can’t survive your shift without a ciggie, at least ensure you have some mints or chewing gum so that we don’t all have to share in your nicotine high. A little note on the bill can be

For Starters

Do’s and Don’ts of Customer Service


Dave for all Seasons

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with Dave Stewart

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Kachumber salad

A refreshing and fresh accompaniment to the below recipe full of fresh summer flavours– just pile it on top of the curry, with a spoonful of Greek yogurt and plenty of chopped coriander. The key to this salad is cutting everything very small, and giving it a little kick with the chaat masala. Take one whole cucumber, cut it lengthways into quarters and then cut out the watery middle section with all the seeds. Finely dice into small cubes. Mix in a salad bowl with 2 finely diced ripe plum tomatoes, ½ small red onion finely diced, 1 small handful finely chopped coriander, 1 small handful finely chopped mint, ½ finely chopped green chilli, the juice of ½ lemon or lime, a pinch of salt and black pepper and two pinches (to taste) of chaat masala (for a simple recipe: grind together 1 tsp cumin seeds, 1 tsp coriander seeds, 1 tsp black pepper, 1 dried kashmiri chilli, 1 tsp black salt (kala namak), 2 tsp mango powder (amchoor), 1/2 tsp ginger powder, and a pinch of asafoetida. Use as required).

Paneer, black eyed bean and potato madras

A vegetarian curry in the madras style – spicy, bold and full of flavour. If you have the budget, set aside £15 and get yourself an electric spice grinder. The difference it makes to your cooking is extraordinary and it means you can always buy whole spices, and grind them up in seconds as and when required, which is an advantage as the whole spices keep their flavour much longer than the ready-ground powders. So, in a spice grinder or pestle and mortar make a quick madras spice blend of 1 tsp cumin seeds, 1 tsp black peppercorns, 1 tsp coriander seeds, 1/2 tsp allspice, 1 tsp turmeric, 1 tsp Kashmiri chilli powder (it’s a relatively mild but vibrantly red one), and ½ tsp fenugreek seeds. Set this powder aside for adding later. Heat 3 tbsp oil in a pan and when hot add 1 tsp black mustard seeds, 1 tsp cumin seeds, ½ cinnamon stick and, 1 whole dried Kashmiri chilli and 12 fresh curry leaves. Once everything’s popping and going nuts add 2 finely sliced onions, a pinch of salt and stir. Lower the heat and put a lid on the pan, and allow the onions to brown for a good 10 minutes, stirring occasionally. Once well browned, turn the heat back up and add 5 crushed garlic cloves and a good inch or so of crushed ginger. Stir-fry this paste for 1 minute and then add 3 finely chopped plum tomatoes, 1 cup water or stock, and your spice mixture. Bring it all to the boil, then reduce the heat to the lowest setting and cover, cooking for 10 minutes or so until the tomatoes are fully cooked into the sauce, and your kitchen smells amazing (you may need to add a drop more water to prevent the sauce from sticking). To this sauce add 1 large potato, cut into bitesize cubes, 1 tin of drained and rinsed black eyed beans, and 1 block of paneer, cut into bitesized cubes. Continue cooking on low, adding water as required, until the potatoes are tender and the paneer soft and yielding. Taste, and season with salt and garam masala as required. A small pinch of crushed dried fenugreek leaves, and 1 whole crushed raw garlic cube can also be added at this point if you really want to boost the flavour. Serve, and top each serving with finely chopped coriander.

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Crazy Golf Coming Soon

Open all day for food every Saturday and Sunday throughout the summer


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International Pan of Mystery

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Turning up the heat on some familiar and not so familiar ingredients from around the world.

Paneer

A home-made, versatile cooking cheese of north Indian cuisine that is usually diced and added to curries, or marinated and then grilled on skewers in hot tandoori ovens until the edges are charred and the insides melting slightly. Not a million miles away from Haloumi, but with a slightly softer texture and less salty taste – the only ingredients you need to make your own paneer are full cream milk and lemon juice. Simply heat the milk, add the lemon juice, and then strain, squeeze and wrap the curds in a cheese cloth. Place a heavy weight on top and refrigerate for a few hours and you will be left with a block of firm paneer ready for slicing and cooking. Try throwing cubes of it into cauliflower, potato and pea curries to add a different texture and flavour, or cooking with chopped spinach,

onions, garlic, fenugreek, pepper, green chillies and double cream to make the classic palak paneer. If you’re planning to barbecue or grill your paneer, cut the slices much flatter and bigger (as opposed to cubed) so that they are easier to turn with tongs and big enough to stand up without breaking, which in turn means they get a chance to properly absorb the smoky flavours and get the right crispy charred edge/yielding centre texture. Pair it with a zingy tomato and coriander or spicy mango, mint and chilli salsa. Getting some: You can buy blocks of paneer in most large supermarkets these days, but as always you’ll get much better value at Indian or Pakistani grocers, where you can pick up huge bags of paneer cubes for a couple of quid.

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Vinho di Montho

Huntsmans Bay Pinot Grigio

IDid you know The Australian 'Boomerang' or 'Hunting Stick' dates back nearly ten thousand years to The Aboriginal Huntsman. Australia's oldest examples of Boomerangs have been found along the bays of Australia's Southern Coastline where the symbol of the Boomerang now holds an iconic status. So it is fitting that this wine has it as its symbol as this is a wine I keep coming back to like... you guessed it a boomerang. It’s a delicious bit of wine freshly cut pear and apple aromas complimented by a fruity medium bodied palate that finished with hints of white peach and vanilla spice. A great summer drink. It’s available now from Tesco for £5.99.

NATIONAL WEEKS OF WHATEVER

National Junk Food Day

July 21

Did you know that Monday July 21 is National Junk Food Day? No. Nor did we until we started researching this article. For us every day is National Junk Food Day but hey ho if there’s a day where we can pig out with no consequences then so be it. Hopefully it’s followed by National Diet Year or Obesity Celebration Week. You’ll find us celebrating at your nearest fast food outlet. See you there!


mans Bay Pinot

s a delicious bit of wine -

al Junk Food Day

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“You talkin’ to me?” A film column with Jamie Hill

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himself. If you missed it, you missed out big time as it was one of the better films of the past few years. The effects were pretty stunning as well. In fact I’ll be digging it out of my Blu-Ray collection once again for a rewatch very soon so I can be totally au-fait with everything that happens before the follow-up to this reboot comes along to our big screens this summer. Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (God, these titles are a bit of a mouthful) is released on July 17 and from the trailer we finally get to see the apes go to war. On horses. The plot sees a growing nation of genetically-evolved apes led by Caesar threatened by a band of human survivors. I’m expecting big things from this film and it’s even got the everexcellent Gary Oldman along for the ride. Apes Vs Humans. Fight!

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although it came up with some nice ideas, lost the plot when it made some serious unwise changes to the source material. I must admit though that the apes looked great but it simply lacked the imagination and power of the original. I’m a big Tim Burton fan but when he strays away from his gothic comfort zone he does tend to create movies that are all talk with no trousers. It ended up being a bit of a mess. But the second reboot Rise of the Planet of the Apes which came along back in 2011 was a surprisingly good film taking us on the journey of how the apes ended up taking over the world in the first place. It had so much to say and said it very well with a very intelligent script which showed the evolution into a super-intelligent being of the chimp Caesar, played by Andy Serkis, who you might know as Gollum and King Kong but never

Arts & Culture

I’ve got two abiding memories of the late Charlton Heston. One is him being followed around his house by Michael Moore questioning him about gun control and his role as the head of the National Rifle Association in Moore’s documentary Bowling for Columbine. The other is the original Planet of the Apes and the immortal line “Take your stinking paws off me you damn dirty ape!” Planet of The Apes was a superb film and Heston was perfect as the lost human astronaut on a world run by apes. Deftly directed and with prosthetics that were ahead of their time back in 1968, it said a lot about the society of the day. Since then we’ve had several sequels that have watered down the power of the original picture as well as two separate reboots. The first reboot was Tim Burton’s Planet of the Apes which,

Food and Drink

The Apes of Wrath


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Breaking a Leg with John Palmgren

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Gardens in Reading on the 16th to the 26th, You can also see Macbeth there between the 18th and 27th (tickets from Progress Theatre), As You Like It is coming to Oxford in the outdoor surroundings of Wadham College throughout July until the 15th of August (tickets from Oxford Playhouse), and Twelfth Night will be in Sparsholt College near Salisbury on the 20th. The very first theatres buit in the UK were open air theatres. Since then the tradition of outdoor and open air theatre has been embraced, despite the ever present chance of having some British Weather. With above average summer temperatures predicted by the Met Office, now is the time to find out more.

Music

'Shall I compare thee to a summers day' wrote Shakespeare in his famous sonnet 18. Summer is upon us and what better time to enjoy the Bard than while in the great outdoors There are lots of chances to catch up with Will's plays this summer while enjoying the (hopefully) good weather. Watching plays outdoors comes with some great benefits and some risks. Live performances often create a special atmosphere and this feels even more intimate when outdoors. It is much easier to sit close to the actors and for them to come into and interact with the crowd. Long summer evenings are perfect for outdoor theatre, you can watch the sun set behind the performers, and bring along some wine and nibbles. Having said that, there can be some problems. Sound and lighting can be more tricky in open spaces, the acoustics can be particularly problematic if there's a large crowd or background noise. But these issues can be dealt with by a well staged performance. Then of course, there is always the chance of rain. In my experience though, the risk is normally worth it. There is plenty to chose from this month. You can see The Tempest in Swindon's Lydiard Park on the 4th. Also at Lydiard Park, Much Ado About Nothing is showing on the 15th (tickets from Wyvern Theatre), Loves Labour's Lost... and Won is on in Caversham Court

Food and Drink

Doing it outside


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Monday July 7 Fancy a laugh? Four Comedians and a compere all for free!


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What not to miss at Frome Festival

Arts & Culture

Manorwell, A brand new Photography and Event Company Just opened in Swindon, have organised the town’s first ever Gay Wedding Fayre. The event takes on July 6 at The South Marston Hotel from 11am to 3pm. Josie and The Outlaw, who are also playing this year’s Swindon Pride, will be providing the music. There will also be some amazing Exhibitors and goodies for everyone to take home. Manorwell is running a competition for all Swindon Couples to win there own Photo-booth for there wedding free of charge just email your wedding date and why you should win to enquiries@manorwell.co.uk Each Couple coming to the wedding fayre get a free photo in the photobooth to take home on the day. Call Eve on 07512 435563 for more info.

Food and Drink

festival on Sunday July 13 at Rook Lane. If it’s Art you’re into, THE OPEN STUDIOS will be open both festival weekends, with some opening during the week as well. THE BLUE HOUSE OPEN GARDEN, with entertainment and refreshments, will be open both Saturday and Sunday from 11am the first weekend. It’s a mini festival and it’s free.. For comedy this year festival punters are spoilt for choice, with the NEW ACT COMPETITION FINAL kicking off at the Old Bath Arms on Thursday July 10. Tickets are also still available for PAUL CHOWDHRY on Thursday July 10 and SEANN WALSH on Saturday July 12. There are tough decisions to be made on Saturday July 12 with Madchester legends THE INSPIRAL CARPETS playing the Cheese and Grain, Folk award winners SALT HOUSE at Cooper Hall, or dance your socks off at SENSONIC at the Silk Mill open til 2am.. Of course it’s not possible to mention everything here, from literary events, to classical music, opera, health walks, yoga so head over to the website at fromefestival.co.uk

For Starters

Frome Festival takes place from Thursday July 3 to Sunday July 13. If you’re still trying to decide what to do during the festival there are still tickets for many events, with many free events on offer too. THE WORLD FOOD FEAST on Saturday July 5 will be bigger and better than ever this year. The Festival has an exciting line-up of emerging and well known favourites at THE GRANARY (The hidden venue behind the George). After the Food Feast why not head over for an evening of Blues with EDDIE MARTIN? On Monday enjoy JOHN LAW’s electric project 'BOINK!', Tuesday an evening of folk with ANGE HARDY, Wednesday an evening of Bengali folk-fusion with KHIYO, Friday July 11 CLAYSON presents an evening of ballads and prog rock, and to finish up the week on Saturday a Dutch Folk band SNOWAPPLE. On Sunday July 6 Violin virtuoso BILLY THOMPSON is bringing his immensely popular Gypsy Jazz style to the ROOK LANE ARTS. MEN IN GENERAL, a five- piece force of male vocal antics will perform on Saturday July 12. FAKE THACKRAY closes the

Swindon’s first gay wedding fayre

A Family Festival at Newbury’s Corn Exchange

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Tickets from the Box Office 0845 5218 218 or book online.

The List

your little one, an interactive family workshop, spellbinding magic, a record breaking beatboxer, talent spotting new local bands, a newly released film or an entertaining outdoor show there is something for everyone, every day during the festival. Including the chance to hug a traffic cone, or dance with a wheelie bin! Pick up a brochure or check online for a list of activities at ww.cornexchangenew.com

Music

Are you ready for #GenerationZ? The Corn Exchange, Newbury, presents its first ever family festival to kick-start the summer holidays. With a fun-filled packed programme this 10 day festival feast is for anyone from tiny tots to teenagers. It takes place from Friday 25 July to Sunday 3 August Whether you’re looking for a gentle introduction to theatre for


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35,000 face the music at Cowl

On Sunday July 6, Cowley Road will be getting all carnival for the day with hundreds of acts and

The List

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

For Starters

The Original Rabbit Foot Spasm Band who are headlining the Manzil Gardens and Manzil Way Stage

On July 6, Oxford’s Cowley Road Carnival will offer its biggest treat yet for music fans, and all for free. Hundreds of musicians and dancers will be performing at venues along the Cowley Road, over the course of 6 hours from 12pm-6pm.

There are two main stages, at Manzil Gardens and the Scrapyard Stage at The Car Park, Chapel Street. Headliners, The Original Rabbit Foot Spasm Band, will be playing the Manzil Gardens stage from 5pm following a packed dance programme put toghether by Dancin’ Oxford, featuring Body Politic taking their inspiration from MINI Plant Oxford. The Original Rabbit Foot Spasm Band has played Glastonbury, Bestival, Ronnie Scott’s and sold out Oxford’s O2 Academy three times. This is your chance to catch their unique brand of vintage jazz for free and on their home turf. The Car Park will host the Scrapyard Stage where Dutty Moonshine will kick off with a mash-up collective of DJ's lacing bass heavy sets with a vintage sound from noon. They will be followed by Count Skylarkin; DJ FU; Temple Funk Collective - an 8 piece Brass Section mixing modern tracks with New Orleans influences; and Zaia – a newly formed East Oxford 6 piece roots dub reggae band already making vibrations with their fresh sound. Last on stage are The Dublings, a 5 piece

Reggae/Dub/Rock band. Alongside the stage there will be a fully licensed bar and covered seating area, as well as fairground rides. Not to be missed. You can also see Count Drachma – led by Stornaway’s Oli and Rob Steadman - playing at the Truck Store on the Cowley Road at 2pm. Supported by funding from Oxford City Council and the Arts Council, and sponsors big and small, this year’s carnival theme is ‘Oxford Faces’ and around 700 people are expected to join the procession which starts with a lead group at 2pm from The Plain at the Oxford end of the Cowley Road. At 2.15pm, when the rest of the procession join the road opposite the East Oxford Community Centre, the public will be asked to take a selfie with the people around them, and tweet to @CowleyCarnival #CarnivalSelfie or post to Instagram, Pinterest or Facebook There are two outdoor licensed bars, on Manzil Gardens and in The Car Park, stalls and food epitomizing the vibrancy and diversity of the Cowley Road area. www.cowleyroadcarnival.co.uk

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usic at Cowley Road Carnival

for the day with hundreds of acts and floats for your delectation....

For Starters

Manzil Gardens and Manzil Way Stage

Manzil Gardens

Inside the Asian Cultural Centre:

Performances, activities, delicious Asian food and art exhibition by Meadowbrook Visionz There’s also a wellbeing spa, family areas and licensed bar.

The Car Park and Chapel Street The Scrapyard Stage

Kazbar

Acoustic sets and Spanish guitar Franz Frenetix + Meli Deli + Datsound: House Music & Chilled Electronica Music Box + Larry Reddington + Aaron Keylock

Methodist Church forecourt

Kingdom of Jamalot and Sensible Dancehall merge to offer Dancehall, Reggae, Soca, Ska, dancehall, Soca, funk, Jazz, Hip hop& Tropical Bass.

East Oxford Community Centre

Front: Kickin’ live music and DJs EOCC’s own DJs and performers from City of Oxford College with Oxford Institute of Music, including Nina Jade + Ebony Keisha Lies of Elizabeth + XCS + Hannah & the lads + Kypptik + Smudge + The Magic Mango Band Finishing off with Reggae and Soca from: Studio 5 & Jamatone

The Library

Food and acoustic music

O2 Academy

Kate Garrett stage Urban and Alternative music by young performers (14-21 yrs) Zamir Wheeler + Beat This + Paige Mathis + Shottz + Nadine Fisher + Voodoo Collective + Mizz Lyrikal + Jack CasstlesJones + Chukie + Mary James + YWMP + Jack Bushrod

Bar Aroma

The Latino Corner Latino DJs, Salsa, Bachata Reggaeton Merengue Zumba Carnival Party

Blanco

Simply takes its soundsystem to its regular Carnival slot

City Arms

Courtyard

Award winning Music and Art Collective, Bear on a Bike stage Jordan O’ Shea and the Commonwealth + Josh Woodman + My Crooked Teeth + Amir Sharma + Sier Pin Sky + Daffyd Jenkins + Balloon Ascents

The Truck Store

Folk venue, with an impressive mix of singer/songwriters and rousing bands Sarah Fell + Jon Fletcher + Howling Taildraggers + Manny & the coloured sky + Frankie the Gambler + Edd Donavan & The Wandering Moles + One Wing Left + Megan Henwood

Fresh food from Comie's Caribbean Kitchen and Spice Lounge Indian Cuisine, and live music: Horns of Plenty + City of Oxford College with Oxford Institute of Music + City Of Oxford Silver Band + Oxford Ukeleles Bands as eclectic as the music they sell, including Oxford Ukeleles & Count Drachma.

Marston Street junction

Street Sounds sound system, featuring DJ Phloss, D90, Super T & Tommy B First Floor Restaurant A hand-picked selection of soulful artists including Samita Atkins.

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James Street Tavern

Crown Street Black Swan

Local traditional music and live DJs: Pavement Whisky + University of Oxford Ceiledh Band

The List

DJs and bands Dutty Moonshine + Count Skylarkin + DJ Fu + Temple Funk Collective + Zaia + The Dublings

Acoustic stage: Nikki Loy + Gazz and Padz + George Huxtable + Darwinswish + In Zanadu + The April Maze

Music

Inner City by Urban Playground, presented by Dancin’ Oxford & Playhouse Plays Out 2pm, 3.15pm & 4.30pm Set on a large adult playground structure, Inner City is a slapstick, comedic choreography for the whole family combining authentic French Parkour (freerunning) with contemporary and urban dance.

Cowley Road

Cape of Good Hope

Art Bar/ Bullingdon Back Room

Diverse and original indie, rock and pop: Error 54 + Moogieman + Madcaps + Mighty Redox + Palahnuik + A Reluctant Arrow + Tess of the Circle + Ran Kan Kan Street front: Tony Nanton & Housewurk

Arts & Culture

Dance including: Hip Hop, Contemporary, Samba, Reggae, Jazz, Bellydance, Commercial and Indonesian 12-2pm Majorettes + Barefoot Bellydance + Oxford Indonesia Society + Attitude Dance School + Camels in the Night + Nia Dance Oxford + Kalika Tribal + Stagecoach Theatre Arts + Mims & Santa Maria Bellydance + Tac-au-Tac Young Dancers + Miss P Performers + Step 2 Dance 3.40-4.30pm Lunas Dance Project Sol Samba Expression School of Ballet Pegasus Street Dance / Body Politic Uniao da Mocidade 5-6pm Original Rabbit Foot Spasm Band Jump, blues & vintage jazz

Fully licensed bar, market, fairground ride, trampolines and covered seating area.

Food and Drink

The line-up and performances


Ocelot97 23/06/2014 15:24 Page 32

Bassett Rivers Echo Friday July 25 2014

65p

Scary News for Scary Times

RECREATE YOUR OWN BATTLE OF YPRES WITH OUR FREE CANISTER OF MUSTARD GAS FOR EVERY READER Details p97 (Please note gasmask not included)

Boy wins prestigious international hide and seek award

MISSING BOY DISCOVERED IN LOFT AFTER TWO YEARS

By Durex Overmyhead Crime Reporter LITTLE Eddie Reardon has been found. After two years of hunting through neighbouring scrubland, the arrest and incarceration of his father, the now Eleven-year-old boy has been discovered. He said: “I’ve just been awarded top prize by the International Hide and Seek Federation so it was totally worth it. “My secret was to hide in the loft of the house living off the water tank and catching rats and eating them raw. I had to be very quiet though especially when the forensics team were in the house. “There were a few close calls, especially when my mum came up to grab the Christmas decorations but I showed them. I am the hide and seek champion of the world!” Eddie, who used to entertain himself by using a rats head and a its entrails as a makeshift yo-yo, was

eventually discovered when the roof started leaking and emergency repairs had to be carried out to the loft’s insulation. From prison his father said: “Boys eh! Who would have them? I might have been put on trial for his murder, separated from my wife who has now moved to Tahiti, and lost an ear in a prison altercation, but it’s so

worth it to know my son is now a hide and seek champion. I didn’t know he was so competitive. Lucky we weren’t playing hangman! Now if only we could find his little sister as we haven’t seen her since we played Cluedo the night before Eddie’s disappearance. It was the same night I discovered Eddie in the dining room with the lead piping.”


Ocelot97 23/06/2014 15:24 Page 33 Page 41

Bassett Rivers Echo COMMENT When life gives you lemons grab the salt and the tequila

There has been a lot of calls lately for more restrictions on alcohol. As the editor of The Echo I totally agree. It’s fine to have five or six brandies, a whole bottle of port and a couple of sambuccas whilst writing a comment piece in a newspaper just like I’m doing right now but I draw the line when it comes to making alcohol so cheap that any little Herbert can purchase it from the supermarket. Making it cheaper only encourages people to drink more and might give them a bit of happiness in their otherwise souless existence and that is totally wrong. Alcohol should be expensive so that only the likes of me can drink and not any old peasant. Let them wallow in their drudgery. And if you disagree you can fight me. Go on, come and have a go if you think you’re hard enough. I’ll have you. I’ll smash you’re face in so hard that you’ll be spitting teeth from your rectum for the next month. Don’t believe me, well I don’t care as I love you. I fucking love you I do. No, don’t leave me. Please don’t leave me. I won’t do it again I promise. It happens to every man. I’ll be better next time. Please just give me one more chance. Go on then. Just piss off then. No, don’t go. I feel a bit sick. Oh dear, I’ve just vomited over my monitor. I think I might just have a little lie down and go to slee.....

Correction

The Echo would like to apologise to the people of neighbouring village Tad Wallop after our chief sports writer got carried away in a report on the local derby football. They are not all massive twats who should be hung from the nearest goalpost and pelted with human faeces as reported. That is not true. Only some of them are.

LETTERS

Bassett Rivers Echo, Friday, July 25, 2014

Schools Trojan Style

I’ve got to say I am totally against Trojan Horse Schools. It’s bad enough that children are forced to learn Latin, a dead language, but to have entire schools devoted to the ancient city state of Troy’s equine population just seems ridiculous. Thirsty Wirk, 58, Ignorance Lane, Bassett Rivers

Hot Rats

I am totally against the practice of cinemas serving hot dogs to their customers. I must admit during a good film I do occasionally gnaw on the odd dog - a Dalmation if I’m hungry but a Chihuaha if I just feel like a light snack. But with a growing population of rats in this country wouldn’t it make more sense that we started serving Hot Rats instead? They’re just as tasty and there’s a plentiful supply and at least you don’t get the problem of crying children when you deprive them of their family pet in the park just so you can fill your stomach. Dee Beasteater, Knuckle Sandwich Road, Bassett Rivers

Inky Tip

Here’s a top tip for your readers if they ever find themselves out of ink during an important meeting where important documents need to be signed and happen to see a Cuttlefish swimming happily by. After diving in and catching it and pummeling it to death with your clenched fists, begin by separating the head and tentacles from the body, much as you would a squid, with a firm pull on the head – a few innards will be left behind, including, usually, the ink sac. Next, gently poke inside the body to find the ink sac, then carefully snip it free with scissors and place in a bowl, adding any loose ink that can be poured from the body cavity. That said, it can be tricky to locate the ink sac

among the rest of the messy, soft innards, so alternatively simply scoop the entire inky contents of the cuttlefish's body into a bowl, stir to release as much ink as possible, then strain out any "bits" through a sieve. You can even rinse the body out a few times, sloshing the fluids with a tablespoon or two of water to maximise the inky return. And hey presto you’ve got enough ink to sign the important documents ten times over. You could even impress your clients even more by cooking the cuttlefish and serving it to them slowly braised with fennel and white wine. Delicious! Christian Prawnagain, Shellfish Close, Bassett Rivers

Tortilla on my head

I’m wearing a tortilla on my head. Shaz Terfarian, 36, Whatthefuck Avenue, Bassett Rivers

Telly Show Fake

I made an important discovery the other day and thought I should share it with your readers. Television is not real. I made this discovery whilst watching a programme called Doctors the other day when I suddenly realised this wasn’t an authentic documentary about life surrounding a GP’s surgery but actually a made-up thing called a ‘story’. And the people who you’re meant to think are doctors aren’t actually doctors at all. I checked on Google. In fact they are something that is called ‘actors’. It’s all made up. They’re just trying to hoodwink us especially that Bill Turnbull on BBC Breakfast where they try to make us think that he’ll eventually get together with weathergirl Carol Kirkwood. It’s not real. None of it is. Holby City, Walford, Iraq, Syria, Coronation Street, Slough and Button Moon don’t actually exist. Terry Twat, 58, Bassett Rivers


Ocelot97 23/06/2014 15:25 Page 34

JULY LISTINGS

Thurs 5th

Dead Royalties + Vault of Eagles + Si Hall 8pm £3

Sat 5th

Guns 2 Roses Guns N Roses Tribute 8pm £7adv £8dr

Fri 4th

The Computers + All Ears Avow + Scout Killers 8pm £10

Sun 6th

TS Theatre Productions present #theorder 7.30pm £7

Weds 9th

Gnarwolves + 2 Sick Monkeys + The Rebecca Riots 8pm £7adv £10dr

Mon 7th Fri 11th

The Ocelot Comedy Night 8pm free

Cash Tribute Johnny Cash Tribute Band 8pm £7adv £8dr

Sat 12th

Felix and the Funk 8pm free

Thurs 17th

Theo Altieri + The Greasy Slicks + The Automaniacs 8pm £3

Tues 15th Fri 18th

Sat 19th Sun 20th

Tues 22nd Thurs 24th

Preachers Son 8pm free

The Hamsters from Hell 8pm free

Hot Red Chili Peppers Red Hot Chili Peppers Tribute 8pm £6 Annual Karaoke Competition Final 8pm free

The Very Most + Yakuri Cable + The King in Mirrors 8pm £3 Boss Cloth Album Launch + Sea Mammal + Skinhorse 8pm £3

Fri 25th

Bands and Burlesque 8pm £5adv £6dr

Tues 29th

Open Mic Night All Welcome 8pm free

Sat 26th

Thurs 31st

U2-2 U2 tribute 8pm £6adv £8dr

The Brompton Mix + Burnthru + TBC 8pm £3


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Ocelot97 23/06/2014 15:25 Page 36

The List

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

For Starters

Let’s Get Ready to Rumba

Joining headliners Jools Holland and Simple Minds at this year’s Cornbury Festival are the world famous Gipsy Kings who will inject a bit of Latin flavour into the festivities. Cornbury takes place from July 4 to July 6 at Great Tew Park in Oxfordshire. When headline act Gipsy Kings look out from the Cornbury Music Festival stage on the last day of the festival they will truly feel at home. To welcome the Grammy-award winning flamenco rumba band to Oxfordshire, festival organisers plan to teach as many of the audience as possible how to dance flamenco rumba. Masterminding this mass free teach-in is flamenco expert Rosa Maria, director of the award-winning dance school Camino del Flamenco. With the help of her team of teachers, Rosa Maria will give rumba lessons throughout Sunday afternoon on 6 July in readiness for The Gipsy Kings’ exclusive UK appearance. The Gipsy Kings headline the main stage at Cornbury Music Festival on Sunday 6 July topping a star-studded line-up including X Factor 2013 winner Sam Bailey and finalist Luke Friend, and an eclectic cocktail of Caribbean flavoured Kid Creole & The Coconuts, 70s hit-makers 10cc, Japanese Jeff Beck Kill Bill theme tune writer Tomoyasu Hotei and Celtic fusion band Peatbog Faeries.

Friday July 4 features breaking Dublin duo Hudson Taylor, perfect popstars The Feeling, great American troubadour Suzanne Vega, and the creators of Everyday People and Mr Wendal, Arrested Development. Friday night wraps up with the strictly-singing pop diva Sophie Ellis Bextor and national treasure Jools Holland with special guests ex-Spice Girl Melanie C, and Soft Cell’s Marc Almond. Saturday July 5 sees the return of festival favourite Jon Allen, American blues travellers Reverend Peyton’s Big Damn Band, Bruce Springsteen’s fellow New Jersey singer and friend, Southside Johnny & The Asbury Jukes featuring Gary US Bonds, and chart topping Nina Nesbitt. The American invasion continues with Illinois rocker Lissie and Grammy-Award winning country new-girl Kacey Musgraves. Other artists include 60s icon Georgie Fame with Guy Barker’s 16 piece big band, pop-hit makers Scouting for Girls, and Scottish rock legends Simple Minds. For details and tickets visit the website at www.cornburyfestival.com

The Ocelot top tip for Cornbury Festival - Hudson Taylor

An intimate, lovelorn folk-pop project Hudson Taylor have emerged as fully formed masters of the Dublin music scene. When you catch them at Cornbury make sure you listen out for “Weapons”, the first track to be taken from their forthcoming debut

LP, out this summer. A perfect song for what will be a perfect festival. Having wracked up over 20,000 EP sales to date and a growing-by-the-minute fanbase, these guys are just about to make the move to the masses with the release of their album. 36


Ocelot97 23/06/2014 15:25 Page 37

WARDENS

“An Oxford alternative trio, playing high tensile, dancefloor indie.”

THE PINK DIAMOND REVUE “A Reading/London duo of synth rock confectioners,

ELOISE REES

master chocolatiers of the ” electric pop groove. ”

“A solo act belting out modern melodic folk music with a contemporary country twist.”

Friday July 25


OK Computers? De

The List

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

For Starters

Ocelot97 23/06/2014 15:25 Page 38

Fantastic pop punk quintet The Computers, from Exeter, wowed the crowds in Marlborough playing Record Store Day recently for Sound Knowledge Record Shop. They’re now set to play two more gigs in Ocelotshire - one at The Vic in Swindon on Friday July 4 and 2000Trees from July 10 to July 12. Rob Escott of the thecolourofvinyl.co.uk caught up with lead singer Alex for a chat.

Hey guys! For people unfamiliar with The Computers, how would you describe yourselves? The Computers are the answer to and cause of all of life's problems. The perfect topping on your favourite pizza, and that stabbing pain of heartburn . We will make you smile and cry, make you feel so alive you want to die. Throw you into thought, or push you to insanity. But most importantly you will dance yourself back to reality. Or you could just call it rock n roll. "Love Triangles, Hate Squares" is great, what made you go in that direction as opposed to the dirty punk of "This Is The Computers"? We wanted to sell a lot more copies of our records and make lots more money! A joke of course. The sound of "Love Triangles" was a long time coming for the band. What might've seemed like a very sudden drastic move was actually in the original plans of the forming of the band. We just needed to figure out how to do it. Loud fast screaming garage punk is our automatic setting, in order to challenge ourselves and push things forward we had to sculpt that new sound, and of course these things take time darling. We never want to write the same record twice. There's no fun in doing the same thing over and over. We've all done our time in the factories of society. And there is no place for monotony in the world of The Computers. How did the recording process differ? In many ways they were the same; both recorded live, shoulder to shoulder, licking every droplet of sweat back into our systems re-absorbing it like little shots of energy. However San Diego had a cool ocean breeze, Georgia had a thick constant density. I think each record captures the tone and the flavours of the air. Have you got record number 3 in the pipeline then? Of course record number 3 is well under way, and we're looking to release it next year. If I told you anything about it I would have to kill you, and we don't want another "incident"... I'm looking forward to catching you at 2000trees as well as in Swindon, that's a cool festival right?

Yeah 2000 trees is really cool. There are lots of great bands playing this year who we have personal friendships with. We have played it before and it was horribly muddier than such stylish cats would like. But that did not get in the way of the party! It was still a fun chaotic affair for all involved. Expect nothing less this time around. I understand you have a new guitarist, former Sharks member Andy Bayliss? How did this come about? Sharks and The Computers have always had a strong bond, since the early days. We love them, they love us. When a gap needed filling Andy was the first thought, and he wilfully accepted the invitation to the family of all families. You've played the last 2 Record Store Days at Sound Knowledge in Marlborough. Why there, what's so cool about Roger, Sound Knowledge and/or Marlborough for you? We will go wherever anyone will have us. Roger is an exceptionally cool dude with epic taste and knowledge. The good people of Marlborough love us, and we love them. It's bit quaint for our liking but all the more reason to get in there and ruffle some feathers. Just get some veggie stuff on the BBQ next time. Why are you so passionate about Record Store Day? We believe vinyl is the finest form of musical enjoyment. 38


ers? Definitely! Ocelot97 23/06/2014 15:25 Page 39

Music The List

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Arts & Culture

good honestly great people. I can't think of one negative experience with bands we tour with. But before I choke on this hippie's hemp stinking cock... The Heavy are our best pals. What's been your strangest experience on the road? Some would say the whole idea of getting into a van and driving 1000 miles to play for one hour is a strange thing to do. We happen to love it. It was quite a surreal moment when Johnny Marr tweeted about us, spreading his wise words informing the nation (mainly Manchester ) to come and watch our show. Then later receiving an email requesting to add him to the guest list... still getting over that. Do you have a favourite show you've ever played? They're all generally good. Lowlands festival 2012 was a belter, a real game changer for our European status. What’s the one question you wish people would ask? What was your childhood like? I could talk for hours about that. A lot of funny and unusual stuff. Or where did you first masturbate. Every guy's answer to that question will be weird. What’s on your iPod at the moment? I don’t have an iPod. On my system at the moment is Royal Headache, Marked Men and Paloma Faith's new record. Finally, any tips for artists we should be keeping our eye on? Turbowolf have a new record coming out and it sounds brilliant. The Heavy have a new record. Colt 45 are great and our best brothers The Dead Formats. Over the ocean look out for Deer Tick and The Violent Hearts, that should do ya for a bit.

Food and Drink

So what's better than putting the finest music on it's finest form and to celebrate that fine matter by playing for the finest businesses to the finest people. Add it all up, it's just simple maths. What are your views on the UK scene at the moment, in particular the punk scene? We have never belonged to a scene. I personally think "scenes" can sometimes limit a band, and can create guidelines and rules and restrictions. At the right time and the right place, a good scene can be paramount to society. But that is hard to come by these days. Sometimes the unity of scenes can leave you feeling caged and chained to the four walls in which you were born. So fuck the scene, because I can assure you it will fuck you harder. Who were your biggest musical influences growing up, and have they changed at all? Of course as you grow, you discover new things. There are many bands and artists from all over the world, from many different walks of life, who have an influence in the way we think. For after all we are lovers of music. As a collective the main influence remains the same as they always have. The Clash, Little Richard, Elvis Costello, The Clash and all things Clash and all things rock n roll. If you get that? Cool! If you don't? Don't worry about it. Just come and see us play and all will become clear. So if you could've been in one band ever, who would it be and why? The Computers because that’s my destiny and that’s real. From all of your time on the road, who are your favourite people to tour with? We have been lucky enough to tour with so many good

For Starters

“The Computers are the answer to and cause of all of life's problems.”


Ocelot97 23/06/2014 15:25 Page 40

with Mark Muggeridge

This is Dan Croll

The List

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

For Starters

This is New Music

Liverpudlian Dan Croll creates funky alt-pop that can bewilder and delight all at the same time. If you think you know but can’t quite place Croll, he was on just about everyone’s ‘One to Watch’ list at the end of last year. His track, From Nowhere was everywhere at the start of the year. Funky with a pop feeling it pleased fans when he was out on the road supporting Haim, Bastille and Chvrches. Now he’s back with a more lilting track, Nobody Knows (ft. The Very Best). It’s a loping track that burst into the light on the chorus and it’s idea as Dan gears up to play festivals like Truck and Boardmasters later this year. Keep an eye out for him if you’re attending these events as we suspect the live show will be an uplifting and delightful surprise for festival goers who don’t know this young hit maker in the making. www.dancroll.com

This is First Aid Kit

From Stockholm in Sweden sisters Klara and Joanna Sderberg give us timeless, enchanting melodic pop. They perform under the name First Aid Kit and tastemaker radio stations around the world have been playing tracks like last years The Lion’s Roar for a few years now. The girls’ latest offering, My Silver Lining from their new album, Stay Gold is such a remarkable, genre defying track for its spacey feel, and almost country style vocals that I wanted to include them here this month. Strings sweve at the start of the track and take us on the road with a tale of longing that at once make us feel as desperate as the characters that the girls summon in their vocals, yet leave us seeing that indeed there is a silver lining to even the darkest situation. I dare you to listen to this and not get lost in First Aid Kit’s fantasy world and not fall in love with their beautiful, whimsical music. thisisfirstaidkit.com

This is Basheba

One of the most determined and focused young artists in the UK today is North London’s Basheba. Working with new producer Dean Barratt, Basheba has created her own distinct style of North London hip-hop which blends Drum & Bass with indie influences and otherworldly sounds. The effect is a dark atmosphere with an edge as sharp as a cut-throat razor over which Basheba’s vocal’s soar. Her current single, Dirty Love (Your Love) features long-time friend, Jordan Reece who steps into the spotlight on the song long enough to make a dramatic impact but then he slips away again to great effect leaving Basheba alone on the track to mesmerically finish spinning her tale. We now hear the Rudimental boys are chasing her to appear on their next album project and Basheba is now also stretching her talent even further, delving into the world of fashion too and will launch her own clothing brand later in the year. With a distinct look, sound and style, Basheba is an artist to watch. Up in the stratosphere is where I think you will soon find this young star of the not so distant future. basheba.tumblr.com 40


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Fri 4th The Splash + Vibroscope + Luke Hall Fri 11th The Road to Sausage, Feat. LUMP

Weds 16th Salisbury Open Mic Fri 18th Black Rush + Pugwall

Fri 25th Bands To be Announced


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The Gig Mon key

The List

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

For Starters

Gig Monkey, AKA Ed Dyer, is a primate on a mission to discover as muc be out and about as well as reviewing as much stuff as you can send h

Of ringing ears and fuzzy heads. The story of The Ocelot’s 8th Birthday show Let it never, ever be said, that The Ocelot doesn’t know how to throw a party. It does; I know so, I have been to many. And the very fact that I have very little recollection of any of them is surely hard evidence that they were damn fine. However, it also makes reviewing the music a somewhat challenging undertaking. But, never one to shirk from my responsibilities I shall do my best to remember what on earth went down on June 6 2014 at The Victoria in Swindon. First thing to say about the night was that, much to everyone’s disappointment, Ocelot editor Jamie didn’t fall off the stage, thereby ruining his fine and hard earned reputation for accidental stage diving. Still, we did not let the lack of slapstick editor idiocy ruin the night, as the booze was plentiful and the music was pretty fine indeed. Openers The Racket feel like a new band, not one that has been kicking around for a few years. Having had a bit of a break from action last year, they had obviously spent a lot of time reworking their sound and changing format, bringing in an additional guitarist, who added a new dimension in a second vocal. It has been nothing short of transformative. The songs are as spikey as before but with extra layers and depths that give them way more space to play in. The rip into their set, still relishing playing live (this is only the 2nd gig of their comeback) and an enthusiastic audience respond to the nearly all new set with as much relish as the band. The new Racket sound more like Oasis than a punked up Libertines now, and they have polished off much of the anarchy and rawness that made them so exciting in the first place, but it is still The Racket. Just a much more grown up version. Typical of an Ocelot night, nothing is played straight. The music is a real mix, so true to this ethos we move on to Reading / Oxford darlings Vienna Ditto. Now, I have made no secret of my love for this band, and as usual, that love was fully vindicated, and embellished, as they turned in another stellar set. One of the things I most like about them is that they are always very different each time you see them, obviously feeding off the setting and crowd. This time, they were messy. Chaotically so, with equipment malfunctions, programming issues and more rambling between songs than usual as things were straightened out. But, they aired some of their new material, so they are excused. Admittedly some

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onlookers didn’t get it, but, as seems to be tradition every time I see them, they won plenty of new hearts and minds. And the new material is smoking too, they do not seem able to put a foot wrong. The third act of the night upped the ante somewhat. Our newcomers of the year 2014, Boss Cloth were pretty fired up for the show, wanting to prove our point. Which they did. A lot. Ear bleedingly loud, if you shut your eyes it sounds like a 5 piece band is before you. But these guys just need the two of them to have this effect. Sounding like Queens Of The Stone Age on PCP, the songs are tight, outrageously melodic but rock harder than a horse nailed to two pieces of curved wood. The new songs that were trotted out don’t mess with the formula, merely keep pushing it further, seeing where the illogical conclusion lies. These is a band who seem to be hitting things at exactly the right moment, and as their songwriting develops and if they can get the right shows, I have a sneaky suspicion a lot more people will soon be fellow paid up followers of the cloth. Headliner Chip Daddy is the budget, West Country version of Goldie Lookin’ Chain. Except he is funnier. Anyone feeling slightly low really needs to check out some of his YouTube clips, especially the go-carting one. I challenge anyone to watch it and not end up needing a Tena pad. His songs are also stupidly funny, full of witty parodies and hilarious lyrics, although perhaps not suitable for your granny. And boy does he put on a show. We were treated to the caterpillar by a fat bloke,


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ate on a mission to discover as much quality original music playing as possible. He will ng as much stuff as you can send him to ed@theocelot.co.uk For Starters

human bicylcles, yo-yo tricks and plastic guns. Seriously, who needs Madonna style production budgets? This was amazing. We even had an impromptu breakdance showdown in the middle of the crowd. Genius level buffonry, and everyone loved it. From there the evening descended into the traditional drink fuelled orgy of self-congratulation, high jinks and laughs that us Oceloteers have come to expect and love. And once again, it was proved that local music really is something that this region deserves to be proud of. Now, if we can just persuade all those big-wigs and execs in their ivory towers to look beyond the ends of their noses every once in a while I think our musicians could go on to rule the world. If they want to.

Gig Monkey’s Slightly Slimmed Down Jukebox

Music The List

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Arts & Culture

blitzkrieg this is a record that travels, pulling you kicking and screaming along with it at one minute, easing you along on fluffy cushions the next. Until it hits the title track, where things derail a little as you are hit by a retro 80’s rock classic that could be a Scorpions number in another lifetime. But, plenty of promise on show here and some impressive musicianship. Watch these guys, it could get interesting…. Sell Your Sky – Two Years (EP) Question – How many people do you need in a band? Six is the answer if Wiltshire’s Sell Your Sky are to be believed. But does having enough members for two bands mean your record is twice as good? Well, that all depends on who you are comparing it to. This is easily twice as good as most stuff of its genre, that harder pop-punk stuff that has chunky riffs, high tempos and growly stuff alongside the pop melodies. It is much more grown-up in fact, and less disposable, and a damn good listen. As I often say, I need to catch these guys live, as there is a vibrancy and energy to the music that is probably electric on stage. However, to go back to my question, this is not twice as good as The Beatles. Or Nirvana. But don’t let that put you off. If this is your genre, go and get a copy of this as it will make you sit up and wonder where they have been all your life, If it is not, give it a go anyway. Vienna Ditto – Feeling Good (EP) Record Of The Month I am not going to waste time with lots of words about how much I love this record. Just get it. Go on, off you go; put down the magazine and go and buy this EP right now. I’m serious, I am not writing anymore until you come back with it….. Urm are you back yet?

SkyBurnsRed – Machines (LP) This is the first full length recording from this Swindon outfit. And also their best work to date by a good margin. Nobody does what they do as well (in fact who does do what they do?) in blending heavy guitar rock with violins. Live was where this always worked best, the violin cutting through the wall of sound with delicious little melodies. Successive EP’s had on reflection, failed to civilise the monstrous size of the band’s sound, leaving things a little murky, fuzzy and indistinguishable. But these recordings have given me a new appreciation of the skill and art of these musicians, and the layers they put into songs. Vocals are clearer and more distinguishable (leading to the understanding of the lyrical stories), the riffs are sharper, more vicious and the violin work now sounds epic, layered up to add melody, emotion and really drive some of the songs. There are backing vocals and neat little tricks that give much of the material a surprisingly poppy feel too. This is also a more dynamic record than before, with a lot more light and dark about it. Brilliant stuff. Formby – Black Hole King (EP) Formby are a self-proclaimed intelligent, sassy UK prog band from Reading, which is a partially true statement. For there is way more going on here. Elements of early 90’s alternative music (The Faith No More comparisons really are apt), classic power balled rock, Pink Floyd-isms and math and jazz “things” litter the songs giving this a pretty original but familiar sound. There is even some big ol’ guitar hero solo shenanigans. There are unconfirmed reports that kitchen sink may well be involved too somewhere. Veering wildly from emotive balladry to all out guitar

Food and Drink

Chip Daddy


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GROOVERS ON M

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The List

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

For Starters

Travels around the local music scenes of Swindon, Oxford, Reading and Salisbury and their outl

Beaver Fuel

By David Murphy Comedy and music are a strange double act. Frank Zappa asked Does Humour Belong In Music?...and in his case, the answer was generally, no – Shut Up ‘N Play Yer Guitar. We’re generally used to good music being punctuated by bad gags, whether it’s Frank’s sexist locker-room fantasies or endless hip hop skits, and we’re used to comedians putting funny lyrics to

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serviceable, forgettable music, but it is rare that the two gel perfectly. Take Oxfordshire’s Beaver Fuel, a clattering punk band (with some decidedly unpunk tricksy chordchanges hidden underneath) whose lyricist, Leigh Alexander, writes some very witty and well-turned words. You won’t always hear all these words when watching the trio, as things tend to get hit quite hard onstage – including the bassist – but the sonic avalanche is pleasing. Still, I recommend trying to catch Leigh play solo, where the true pleasure of his songs is evident, be they about naughty words and shitting in shoes, or weightier, more thoughtful topics like religion and the orthographical impact of urban culture. We’ll be seeing him later

tonight, where he’s filling in for a cancelled act. Too many bands in Oxford are cancelling gigs, and it should stop: everybody knows that turnouts can be low, but the best way of getting paying customers in the door is not forcing venues to say “somebody’s on next week, but we’re not yet sure who because a percussionist forgot the date of their great-aunt’s wedding anniversary”. Leigh often steps up to fill empty bills, as well as turning up as a punter in more gigs than most acts, proving he’s more serious about the health of local music than plenty of more serious performers: some musicians are funny, and some are just a joke.

Newport Pagnell” or which ever salubrious locale you find yourself in. If, however, you decide to stay and watch some of the 200 acts appearing on the bill, remember that with careful planning you might get to see as many as eight of them over the weekend. Top billing may go to two of your favourite bands but obviously they will be appearing simultaneously at opposite ends of the festival. Promoters are just like that I’m afraid. You should always get drunk before attempting to put your tent up, this will ensure a video of what follows will go viral on You Tube within a week and after all that’s the reason you go to festivals isn’t it? Be honest now. If you find yourself taken short whilst deep in a sea of ironic knitwear and designer wellies and you don’t want to lose your space, just wee into a plastic pint cup and lob it in a majestic

arc at the bassist, trying to inflict splash damage on as many Kings of Leon fans as you can along the way. Festivals are expensive and alcohol inside the arena has a market value akin to platinum so why not build your own moonshine still and maybe make enough money to buy a plate of chick pea falafel and rice that has been boiled for three days. And ladies, if the urge strikes you to climb on your boyfriends shoulders and “get them out” during Kasabians' set, remember that your Dad, Mr Patel who runs the mini-mart and the sleazy curtain twitcher at number 7 will all be watching this via extended coverage on BBC3. Have fun out there kiddies

A Music Festival Survival Guide

By Dave Franklin of Dancinig About Architecture blog Spork? Check. Digeridoo? Check. Canoe? Check. Yes, it’s festival season once more and here are a few useful tips to help you survive any eventuality that the hipster mating season can throw at you. The first obstacle is road congestion caused by all these migratory designer beards and their handlers, so if possible set off at least 5 days before the festival starts to ensure disappointment and similarly for a stress free return journey, head for home as soon as you hear the first band of the weekend announce “Hello

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Reading and Salisbury and their outlying areas with our hand-picked team of music writers. By Sid Siddle of Club Velocity

Re T ad he final on the TV. It was like watching Radiohead for the first time in front of in gb eight people in the back room of the Imperial, Nottingham in 1992. it Palm Honey seem to have come from

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Music The List

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Arts & Culture

Sausage is a non-profit, intimate, friendly festival near Salisbury, firmly based on good music and merriment. It takes place at Greenacres Farm in Rockbourne near Salisbury on Friday July 25 and Saturday July 26. And this is one festival that’s got the entire city

of Salisbury into a bit of a lather as it’s a local festival for local acts celebrating everything musical that the area has to offer. Weekend camping tickets are just £25 and are available online or in person from the Winchester Gate or the Musicbox in Salisbury. Acts already announced are Funke and the Two Tone Baby, Gaz Brookfield, Corridors, Bonsai Pirates, Crippled Rook, Captain Accident & The Disasters (pictured), The Intercepteurs, Nudy Bronque, Lyrical Monsoon, Karl Phillips, Dirty Skankin’ Love Hornets, Lump, Liam O'Kane, Alabaster Queen, Willowen, Or So She Said, Lucas Hardy, Oliver Rose, Paul Garry, Huck (Calling Christopher), Henry Praulins and Luke Hall. There’s also a set from DJ Dazman as well as a Silent Disco and a Pub Music Quiz. Check out full details on the website at sausagefestival.webs.com

Sausagefest 2014

Food and Drink

Not many bands have the NME bigging them up before they have even played a gig. Ladies and Gents let me introduce Palm Honey probably the hottest new kids on the block, from round these parts. For the record they are definitely not a Radiohead tribute band. Their first proper gig was a wonderful life affirming event. Yes, a little rough round the edges.What else would you expect in a real old school boozer, with hardly any PA and the Champions League

nowhere. No one I know know them, as people. They all look about 12, they look like some delightful weird street gang of urchins. They might just be the saviors of indie pop. This shit means the world to them. Hopefully they also hate hippies. Alan McGee wants to manage 'baby' bands-well he should have a good look here. The bigger indie record labels should check these out properly in say early 2015. The likes of Heavenly, 4AD, Wichita and maybe even XL.Peel would have loved them. For the mature reader think Ride, Slowdive, Chapterhouse and the long lost Eternal (track down their one and only 7" release on Sarah a classic) The young whipper snappers think Temples,Wycthes and Tender Trap. Very Thames Valley Scene (ask your mum) I believe in Palm Honey. You should to. Palm Honey play the Queens Arms, Reading July 5th - www.facebook/palmhoneyband

For Starters

Palm Honey


SHOW QUEEN!

The List

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

For Starters

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The Hexagon in Reading is holding one very special gig this September 5 when The Queen Extravaganza comes to town. The Queen Extravaganza is a spectacular touring concert show featuring the glorious music and live experience of legendary rock band Queen as performed by a new generation of musical talent. Original Queen band mates and songwriters—iconic drummer Roger Taylor and legendary guitarist Brian May—are the masterminds behind The Queen Extravaganza. The new band was selected by Roger Taylor in a unique online talent search in 2011. The contestants were voted on by the public during several rounds of online auditions. The finalists travelled to Los Angeles for the final audition for Taylor. The buzz surrounding the auditions sparked worldwide interest, with video submissions generating more than 10 million views. Seen by more than 20 million people, The Queen Extravaganza made their television debut on American Idol in April 2012. The electrifying live 48

performance of “Somebody to Love” featured special appearances by original Queen band mates Roger Taylor and Brian May. Tickets: Standing £24.50 (Downstairs), Seated £26.50 (Balcony). Visit Reading Arts website to book tickets at www.readingarts.com


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CABARET Thursday June 12 Arlington Arts FRENCH CAN CAN 7:30pm ... a critically acclaim stage spectacular that celebrates the high kicking glamour of one of the world’s most famous dances ever performed Sunday July 27 Corn Exchange MORGAN & WEST: TIME TRAVELLING MAGICIANS - A mind blowing extravaganza from the time travelling Victorian magicians.

NEWBURY

Friday July 18

New Greenham Arts MARK THOMAS - WORK IN PROGRESS 8pm

Tuesday July 22 and Wednesday July 23 Corn Exchange JASON MANFORD: FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS 7.30pm

Saturday July 26 New Greenham Arts DAN SCHREIBER & RACHEL PARRIS 8pm Edinburgh Festival Preview Double Bill READING

Saturday July 5 Jongleurs Comedy Club DAVID WARD + JAMES ALDERSON + BRYAN LACEY + WAYNE DEAKIN 8:30 pm prices from £17

Friday July 18

South Street Arts Centre LLOYD GRIFFITHS & PAUL MCCAFFREY SCOUNDRELS Edinburgh comedy Preview double bill 8pm

Friday July 25 to Sunday July 27 The Hexagon

NEWBURY

Saturday July 5

Arlington Arts Centre QUANTUM LEAP XI 2:30pm and 7.30pm A weekend of inspiring and uplifting dance hosted by Park House School and performed by talented dancers from West Berkshire schools and Youth Dance Companies.

FAMILY EVENTS

Sunday July 6 Arlington Arts Centre MIXED MOTION DANCE 3:30pm and 7pm

NEWBURY

Monday July 28 to Sunday August 3 Arlington Arts Centre STEPS AHEAD SUMMER DANCE WEEK

Sunday July 27 Corn Exchange OLD MACDONALD HAD A FARM check times and prices

Saturday July 12 and Sunday July 13 Arlington Arts Centre ALL STAR DANCE 2pm and 6.30pm presents “The Magical Adventures of Peter Pan”: a beautiful ballet story for children and adults alike.

READING

Saturday July 26 Corn Exchange SATURDAY STORIES on the Corn Exchange Balcony Bar - Come and spend a morning with your family and listen to some stories in a friendly environment.

Monday July 28 Market Place THE MENAGERIE - Radio controlled street furniture, whose members love to perform individually or as part of the herd.

Thursday July 24 The Hexagon FLASH MOB 7.30pm DJ NIGHTS READING

Every Thursday

Oakford Social Club REMIX CLUB NIGHT 8pm to 1am Sub89 PROPAGANDA CLUB NIGHT 10.30pm Every Friday Face Bar RELOADED CLUB NIGHT 9pm

Friday July 11 Sub89 SUBKULTURE SUMMER JAM: NU:TONE B2B LOGISTICS, IVY LAB, + TECHNIMATIC 10pm £6

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Tuesday July 29 Corn Exchange SMALL FABLES - A dynamic hand shadow puppet show for the whole family.

Wednesday July 30 Corn Exchange NICK COPE: FAMILY MUSIC on the Corn Exchange Balcony Bar 10.45am £3 Corn Exchange THE SELFISH GIANT - Since building a wall around his garden, the Selfish Giant only gets to see Lady Snow and her friends. READING

Friday July 18 to Sunday July 20

The Hexagon ANGELINA BALLERINA - THE MOUSICAL - A

The List

Saturday July 19 Jongleurs Comedy Club ANDY ROBINSON + DR GEORGE RYEGOLD + LARRY DEAN + RUDI LICKWOOD 8:30 pm prices from £17

DANCE

Saturday July 26 South Street Arts Centre DARKLANDS - Club night playing post-punk, fuzz, C86, Goth, Electronic, Indie pop and Industrial. doors 8pm Jazz Café I FOUND LOVING – THE SOUL REUNION PARTY: THE BRIGHT & BEAUTIFUL SUMMER BALL EDITION! DJ's ON THE NIGHT WILL BE: Joys Of Life Gold Ash Selector (Solar Radio & Soul Shack) Mike Artwell (Bournemouth) Rude Bwoy Monty MUSIC POLICY: Playing the very best in 70s, 80s, 90s Soul & RnB, Rare Groove and Lovers Rock. DOORS OPEN: 10pm - 3am inner Including Entry : £34.50 Entry Only Tickets : £10

Music

Friday July 11 Jongleurs Comedy Club SIMON CLAYTON + DANA ALEXANDER + JIMMY MCGHIE + CHRIS TURNER 8:30pm prices from £17

Saturday July 26 Jongleurs Comedy Club DIANE SPENCER + WILL MARS + JOHN LYNN + ADDY VAN DER BORGH 8:30 pm prices from £17

Friday July 25 Sub89 CUBED W/ ONEMAN 10:30pm £8

Arts & Culture

Thursday July 24 Corn Exchange JONGLEURS - Newbury's favourite monthly comedy club. 7.30pm

South Street Arts Centre JUSTIN MOORHOUSE & TOM PRICE SCOUNDRELS Edinburgh comedy Preview 8pm

Food and Drink

COMEDY

Friday July 25

Saturday July 12 Sub89 DAMAGE - LIVE! 10:30pm £5

For Starters

NEWBURY

DAWN FRENCH: 30 MILLION MINUTES TOUR 7.30pm


For Starters

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brand-new Magical Musical live on stage - Fri 4.30pm, Sat 11am, 2pm, 4.30pm, Sun 11am, 2pm, 4.30pm

Wednesday July 23 South Street Arts Centre "WHO YA GONNA CALL?" - Comic live homage to 'Ghostbusters' followed by a screening of the film for its 30th anniversary. 7.30pm

Tuesday July 29 The Hexagon THE SOOTY SHOW - Sooty, Sweep and Soo are back... 11am & 2.30pm

NEWBURY

Sunday July 27 South Street Arts Centre THE GREATEST BUBBLE SHOW ON EARTH Louis The Amazing Bubble Man returns by popular demand! 11.30am & 2pm

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

FESTIVALS READING

Saturday July 5 Thames Promenade, Richfield Avenue Third Rail Music Festival 12noon - 10pm FILM NEWBURY

Friday July 4 to Thursday July 10 Corn Exchange T.S. SPIVET 2D (CERTIFICATE TBC) Times vary £5.50/£7.50 Saturday July 5 to Wednesday July 9 Corn Exchange OF HORSES AND MEN (15) Times vary £5.50/£7.50

Friday July 11 to Wednesday July 16 Corn Exchange CAMILLE CLAUDEL 1915 (PG) Times vary £5.50/£7.50

Friday July 11 to Thursday July 17 Corn Exchange JERSEY BOYS (15) Times vary £5.50/£7.50

Friday July 18 to Thursday July 24 Corn Exchange CYCLING WITH MOLIERE (15) Times vary £5.50/£7.50 Corn Exchange THE 100-YEAR-OLD MAN WHO CLIMBED OUT THE WINDOW AND DISAPPEARED (15) Times vary £5.50/£7.50 Friday July 25 to Thursday July 31 Corn Exchange BOYHOOD (15) Times vary £5.50/£7.50 READING

The List

Thursday July 3 Caversham Court Gardens TOP GUN 7pm Friday July 4 Caversham Court Gardens DONNIE DARKO 7pm

GIGS AND CONCERTS Friday July 18 Corn Exchange HEAVEN IN A HELL OF WAR This gala performance stands as part of a range of events connected to the centenary of World War I and to the National Trust property, Sandham Memorial Chapel. Thursday July 24 Corn Exchange LIVE AND LYRICAL Open-Mic Talent night 7.30pm Thursday July 31

Corn Exchange NEW: MUSIC - Newbury Music is presenting the first ever NEW:MUSIC competition, in partnership with the #GenerationZ festival. READING

Wednesdays

Pavlov’s Dog OPEN MIC 8pm free

Thursdays The Walkabout OPEN MIC 8pm free - all styles welcome Tuesday July 1 The Hexagon BELLE BOWS - Reading Summer Proms 1.10pm

Wednesday July 2 Concert Hall FATHER WILLIS - Lunchtime Organ Recital A student from Eton College. 1pm

Thursday July 3 Face Bar TOP DOG PROMOTIONS PRESENTS NO CONSEQUENCE + DREWSIF STALIN + FRIEND FOR A FOE + SUPPORT 6pm Progress Theatre Jazz at Progress: Standard Miles: SIMON SPILLETT QUINTET 7.30pm Walkabout Hubcap presents EXPLORERS + THERE TURN TO LOSE + TBC free entry 8pm Saturday July 5 Reading Summer Proms East Reading Festival presents READING BACH CHOIR 7.45pm

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The Hexagon BERKSHIRE MAESTROS EXTRAVAGANZA 3pm & 7pm Concert Hall East Reading Festival with SOUTH CHILTERN CHORAL SOCIETY as part of Reading Summer Proms 7.30pm Jazz Café REVOLUTION BAND WITH DJ 7.30pm Dinner Including Entry : £34.50 - Entry Only Tickets : £8.00 Queens Arms Club Velocity/Malfunction/TBC presents SISTER RAY + NORTHEAST CORRIDOR + FORMBY + PALM HONEY Doors 8pm £5 (door) £4 (advance) www.wegottickets.co.uk Sunday July 6 Risc and Global Cafe READIFOLK presents O Brother Special READING'S FOLK SONG & MUSIC CLUB Sundays 8:00 -10:30 p.m £2 Monday July 7

Sub89 WE ARE SCIENTISTS 7:30pm £15 Tuesday July 8

Sub89 THE STRANGLERS + THE 45'S [SOLD OUT!] 7:30pm £25

Friday July 11 Sub89 SEX PISTOLS EXPERIENCE + ED TUDOR POLE 7pm @ The Bowery District £10 Saturday July 12 Sub89 THE CRIBS + MENACE BEACH 7pm £17 Sunday July 13

Risc and Global Cafe READIFOLK presents SOIREE 8pm -10:30pm £6 Tuesday July 15

Sub89 IMMORTAL TECHNIQUE 7:30pm @ The Bowery District £17 Thursday July 17

Sub89 IAN MCLAGAN 7pm £15 South Street Arts Centre Thirdsday Blues - HARMONICA HEAVEN FEAT. STEPHEN FULLER, NEIL WARREN & STEVE 'WEST' WESTON - Monthly Blues Night! 8pm Friday July 18 Rising Sun Arts Centre Hubcap presents JAKABO + SISTER RAY + 13D + JOSH HETZE 8pm free entry Saturday July 19


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VAGINA DIALOGUES 8pm - How about a thought-provoking, fun discussion about mothering which will inspire you, and therefore your family, to greater things?

Friday July 25 Sub89 GBH + THE TWIN DRACULA + RAGE DC 10pm £10

READING

Wednesday July 16 Arlington Arts Centre TEDx 10am - Join us for West Berkshire first TEDx event, focussing on issues surrounding modern education, inspired by TED's notion of Ideas worth spreading.

Saturday July 26

Thursday July 3 The Hexagon SIR RANULPH FIENNES: LIVING DANGEROUSLY 7:30pm

Sun Inn Hubcap presents MEN THAT FOLLOW + HELL ON TRIAL UK + DOG HOUSE + BABY HOWL 8pm free entry Sunday July 27 Sub89 THE PRETTY THINGS PEEPSHOW! 7:30pm £8 Risc and Global Cafe READIFOLK PRESENTS WILD CLOVERS 8pm 10:30 p.m £6 Monday July 28

Tuesday July 29 Sub89 65DAYSOFSTATIC w/NORDIC GIANTS 7:30pm £12 UPPER WOOLHAMPTON

Wednesday July 9 Douai Abbey ABF THE SOLDIERS’ CHARITY CONCERT – ORGAN AND ORATORIO RECITAL An unmissable charity concert at Douai Abbey.

QUIZ NIGHTS READING

Every Monday Oakford Social Club THE OAKFORD SOCIAL PUB QUIZ 9pm TALKS AND POETRY Thursday July 3 New Greenham Arts

Tuesday July 1 to Saturday July 12

The Watermill Theatre HARDBOILED - THE FALL OF SAM SHADOW Created by Rhum and Clay Theatre Company and Beth Flintoff

Wednesday July 2 Arlington Arts Centre RDT COLLEGE SHOW CASE 7:30pm - An evening of dance, drama and song from the Musicals of the West End and Broadway, featuring a live band and the next generation of musical stars! Thursday July 10

Arlington Arts Centre BARTS ARTS 7pm Jazz Combo's, St Bart’s Band, Strings & Choir. A spectacular evening of talent, with a wide ranging programme of music, drama, dance & art. Saturday July 12

Newbury Racecourse TOSCA - A 'masterpiece' combining powerful drama and unforgettable music. Sunday July 20

Arlington Arts Centre RT SCHOOL: THE GREATEST SHOW on Earth 3pm Saturday July 26 Corn Exchange THE BEE MAN OF ORN Newbury Youth Theatre present their Summer Show READING

Tuesday July 1 and Wednesday July 2

South Street Arts Centre South Street Youth Theatre present CHANNEL

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Saturday July 19 South Street Arts Centre SARA DAVIES - MY HOMETOWN - Reading Fringe Festival All Dayer presents - various times

South Street Arts Centre Quite Nice Theatre – AT THE EDGE OF THE WORLD - Reading Fringe Festival All Dayer presents 3.45pm South Street Arts Centre IMPROMPTU SHAKESPEARE - Reading Fringe Festival All Dayer presents 7pm South Street Arts Centre UPSTAIRS DOWNTON: THE IMPROVISED EPISODE - Reading Fringe Festival All Dayer presents 8.30pm South Street Arts Centre Quite Nice Theatre - SNAKES! THE MUSICAL Reading Fringe Festival All Dayer presents 10pm Tuesday July 22

South Street Arts Centre LEAVING HOME PARTY by Catherine Ireton Special Edinburgh Fringe preview 8pm

Thursday July 24 South Street Arts Centre THE INGENIOUS GENTLEMAN DON QUIXOTE OF LA MANCHA - Special pre-Edinburgh preview show from Little Soldier 8pm THEATRICAL SCREENINGS NEWBURY

Thursday June 26 to Tuesday July 1

Corn Exchange NT ENCORE: A SMALL FAMILY BUSINESS 7pm Sunday July 6 Corn Exchange GLYNDEBOURNE - DON GIOVANNI Corn Exchange Live and Encore screening

Saturday July 19 Corn Exchange NT ENCORE: SKYLIGHT broadcast from the West End by National Theatre Live. Sunday July 20 Corn Exchange MONTY PYTHON LIVE (MOSTLY) comedy legends Monty Python will perform live on stage together this year.

The List

NEWBURY

THEATRE NEWBURY

Caversham Court Gardens READING OPEN AIR SHAKESPEARE: LOVE'S LABOUR'S LOST... AND WON 7.45pm

Music

Sunday July 20 Douai Abbey BERKSHIRE MAESTROS FUNDRAISING CONCERT - A special evening of song and music to help raise funds for local autism charity Prior’s Court

South Street Arts Centre POETS' CAFE - HARRY MAN - Monthly poetry night hosted by A F Harrold doors 8pm

Wednesday July 16 to Saturday July 6

Arts & Culture

Sub89 PUBLIC ENEMY 7:30pm £28

Friday July 18

Friday July 11 The Hexagon PLATFORM YP SUMMER SHOWCASE 7.30pm

Food and Drink

Sunday July 20 Risc and Global Cafe READIFOLK presents SINGERS NIGHT 8pm10:30 p.m £2

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For Starters

Rising Sun Arts Centre Bandoramma/Club Velocity with The Annual Birthday Bash For Kevin presents BELLYEYESMILE + THE PINK DIAMOND REVUE + TBC - Doors 8pm All Ages £5 (door) £4 (advance)


The List

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

For Starters

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A festival down by the river RIVERSIDE FESTIVAL 26-27 July 2014 Charlbury, Oxfordshire Riverside is a free family-friendly music festival in an idyllic riverside setting in the Cotswolds, with more than 40 acts playing across three stages. There’s rock, indie, jazz, and folk on the main two stages and all sorts on the Riverside Fringe stage. It began life 19 years ago as a jazz picnic for friends. It now attracts thousands of music lovers to Charlbury’s Mill Field, and yet is still the friendliest, most relaxed music festival in Oxfordshire and, astonishingly, is still completely free to enter. With great music and masses of kids’ activities, Riverside is one of the most popular events in the music calendar with families. Building on the success of last year’s Bushcraft skills sessions and Physics in the Field experiments, Festival director Andy Pickard has invited Charlbury’s Little Wild Things to explore that timeless childhood plaything the stick, giving children the chance to use their imaginations to create, swords, wands, puppets, even dens. There will also be a willow maze, storytelling, nature trails, music workshops, arts and crafts sessions, outdoor games and a bouncy castle. And, new this summer, is a special area where parents and babies can relax, with Chipping Norton midwifes

on hand to offer advice and support. Riverside is always an enticing blend of old friends and new acquaintances. In the mix this year are The Epstein and Family Machine, both hugely popular in the past with the Riverside audience, and great bands like ToLiesel and The Knights of Mentis playing at Riverside for the first time. Star booking is probably Candy Says who wowed the Songbird stage at last year’s Cornbury Music Festival and is making quite a name for themselves in Oxfordshire and beyond. Little Brother Eli look like they should be a riot, and Dubwiser’s skanking reggae beats will be perfect for a sunny Riverside afternoon.

The second year of FollyFest takes place from Friday August 1 to Sunday August 3 in and around the Market Square in Faringdon, Oxfordshire. This year is going to be even better than last year with bands on the Market Place Main Stage, as well as loads of other stuff going on nearby. FollyFest is a not for profit family orientated festival of Art, Music and Drama. Bands performing on the Market Square stage include Oxford band The Original Rabbit Foot Spasm Band, Faringdon band Boogie-Me, The Wirebirds and more. There are also other independent events in other venues around the town. These include a Children’s

Fancy Dress Parade from the Town Park behind Faringdon Town Library – the theme this year is Insects. There will be a return of the Victorian Magic Lantern show from last year, for a small charge, Kalika Tribal Belly Dance display, Modern Jive Dance display, open mike poetry session in The Bobbin Bistro, and if a hoe-down is your thing, there is a Country and Western night in the Corn Exchange, on Saturday evening for a small charge. On Sunday morning we will have an outdoor Church service in the Market Place on the stage with Faringdon Churches Together. www.follyfest.co.uk

Follyfest is back … even better than before!

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ART EXHIBTIONS Saturday July 19 and Sunday July 20 Broad Street BOFFY ARTS MARKETS ART MARKET Fishes THE OXFORD ART FAIR with loads of artists to choose from CABARET OXFORD

Tuesday July 8 Burton Taylor Studio MORGAN & WEST: TIME TRAVELLING MAGICIANS 8pm £8 Thursday July 10

North Wall Arts Centre THE BREMEN TOWN MUSICIANS with NICOLE ET MARTIN 1.30pm £14/£10

Saturday July 12 North Wall Arts Centre THE FISHERMAN & HIS WIFE with NICOLE ET MARTIN 6.30pm £14/£10 WANTAGE

Friday July 4 Shush Night Club ‘TRIFLE THE FOURTH (JULY) – INDEPENDANCE DAY’ 9pm – 3am - An unmissable night of DJs and fabulous burlesque from the Cheeky Cherry Cabaret £10 advance

OXFORD

Saturday July 5 Venues across Oxford ALICE'S DAY.

Sunday July 6 Venues across Oxford’s Cowley Road COWLEY ROAD CARNIVAL CHARITY EVENTS Saturday July 12

Bowmoor Sailing Club

Sunday July 13 Oxford City Centre RACE FOR LIFE

WITNEY

Thursday July 17 Fat Lil's HOBGOBLIN COMEDY AWARDS 8pm £8 / Door: £10 Acts to be announced very soon DANCE DIDCOT

Tuesday July 15 to Saturday July 19 Bonn Square CHARITY LINK DOGS TRUST www.dogstrust.org.uk

Saturday July 19 Bury Knowle Park CHURCHES TOGETHER IN HEADINGTON FUN DAY funday@headingtonchurches.org.uk COMEDY

Saturday July 10 to Saturday July 12 Cornerstone Arts Dance Connection Presents: BEYOND LIMITS 7.30pm with Saturday 1.30pm £16/£13 OXFORD

Friday July 11 Oxford Playhouse TANGOMOTION 8pm £22 / £19 / £15 / £13 a performance bursting with intoxicating Argentinian rhythms and Latin passion. DJ NIGHTS/DISCO

OXFORD

Thursday July 3 New Theatre DAWN FRENCH: 30 MILLION MINUTES 7.30pm £39

Saturday July 5 Glee Club CARL DONNELLY + DAVID TRENT + TREVOR CROOK + MATT FORDE - The Best In Live Stand-up Comedy -£14.50 Full Price £5.00 NUS Doors open 7:15pm Last Entry 8:00pm Saturday July 12

Glee Club CHARLIE BAKER + ERIC LAMPAERT + ANDREW RYAN + RUSSELL HICKS - The Best In Live Stand-up Comedy -£14.50 Full Price £5.00 NUS Doors open 7:15pm Last Entry 8:00pm Tuesday July 15 and Wednesday July 16 New Theatre

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OXFORD

Every Wednesday

O2 Academy, Cowley Road 0844 4772000 BROOKES BIG NIGHT OUT w/ Dub Focus - Students only 10.30pm to 2am O2 Academy 2, Cowley Road 190 CLUB NIGHT 10pm to 2am Over 18s Every Friday O2 Academy, Cowley Road 0844 4772000 SWITCH DJ NIGHT 11pm

Every Saturday O2 Academy, Cowley Road Tel - 0844 4772000 PROPAGANDA + TRASHY + ROOM 101 + JACK FM Oxford’s biggest indie night. 18+ 10:30pm £5-£6 The Cellar, Frewin Court EXTRA CURRICULAR weekly electronic and bass-heavy music night FREE B4 11pm £5after

The List

LECHLADE

Saturday July 12 Oxford City Centre SOBELL HOUSE HOSPICE CHARITY OXFORD'S MOONLIGHT STROLL

Saturday July 26 Glee Club MARK OLVER + JIMMY MCGHIE + IAN STONE + CARL DONNELLY - The Best In Live Stand-up Comedy -£14.50 Full Price £5.00 NUS Doors open 7:15pm Last Entry 8:00pm

Music

CARNIVALS

Saturday July 5 Gloucester Green OXFORDSHIRE FIRE & RESCUE 40TH ANNIVERSARY OPEN EVENT Oxford City FC 3G pitches OXFORDSHIRE MUSIC CHARITY FOOTBALL WORLD CUP 12:00 pm - 4:00 pm £5

Saturday July 19 Glee Club ADAM BLOOM + ROGER MONKHOUSE + PETE OTWAY + CHRIS KENT - The Best In Live Stand-up Comedy -£14.50 Full Price £5.00 NUS Doors open 7:15pm Last Entry 8:00pm

Arts & Culture

Friday July 11 North Wall Arts Centre HANSEL AND GRETEL with NICOLE ET MARTIN 1.30pm and 6.30pm £14/£10

Wednesday July 2 and Thursday July 3 Oxford University UNIVERSITY OF OXFORD OPEN DAY www.ox.ac.uk/opendays

Friday July 18 North Wall Arts Centre ADAM BUXTON: KERNEL PANIC 8.30pm £16

Food and Drink

Every Thursday East Oxford Community Centre, Cowley Rd CATWEAZLE CLUB 8pm to 11pm the city’s longest running and best cabaret show

Wednesday July 2 Venues across Oxford RYE ST ANTHONY CHARITY WALK

LEE EVANS WORK IN PROGRESS 8pm £33.90

For Starters

OXFORD

BIG SWIM EVENT In aid of Prospect Hospice. The event, in its second year, invites participants to take to the water for a 500m, 1.2km, 2.6km or 3.8km dip OXFORD


Food and Drink

For Starters

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Friday July 4 Cellar Bar, Frewin Court SKYLARKIN' SOUNDSYSTEM: CARNIVAL WARM UP 10pm-3am / £5 adv/£6 otd ZAIA + Tom Showtime + Count Skylarkin + Sensible Dancehall DJs

Saturday July 5 Cellar Bar, Frewin Court THE OXFORD WHEELS PROJECT PRESENTS... THE BMX JAM AFTER PARTY 9pm / £5 all night Friday July 18 Cellar Bar, Frewin Court SHEDONISM! DISCO SHED DJs 10pm-3am / free before 11pm/£5 after Friday July 25

O2 Academy Oxford SANCHEZ - Live in concert 10pm FAMILY EVENTS DIDCOT

Sunday July 20 Cornerstone Arts Squashbox Theatre Presents: CURIOUS CREATURES 2pm £8/£6

Arts & Culture

OXFORD

Monday June 30 to Tuesday July 1 New Theatre ANGELINA BALLERINA - Check Times

Sunday July 6 Burton Taylor Studio JACK AND THE BEANSTALK 11am and 2pm £7.50/£5.50 Saturday July 12 Burton Taylor Studio THE POETRYJOE SHOW 11am and 2pm £7.50/£5.50

Music

FESTIVALS CHARLBURY

Saturday July 26 to Sunday July 27 The Mill Field RIVERSIDE FESTIVAL Free CHIPPING NORTON

Friday July 4 to Sunday July 6 Great Tew Park CORNBURY MUSIC FESTIVAL @ Great Tew Park £170 (adult weekend pass) / £89 (young person weekend pass)

The List

DIDCOT

Friday July 25 Cornerstone Arts ACCESS ALL AREAS - A festival of workshops, activities and performances for adults with

learning disabilities. 10am to 3pm

STEVENTON

Friday July 18 to Saturday July 19

Hill Farm TRUCK FESTIVAL 2014 £74 (weekend ticket) / Under 12s free when accompanied by an over 21 year old / Car parking £5 / Campervan pass £30 FILM

OXFORD

Saturday July 12 Oxford Castle Unlocked AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON in the Old Prison Exercise Yard 7pm GIGS AND CONCERTS

ABINGDON

Mondays Old Anchor Inn MONDAY NIGHT MUSIC GROUP (folk singing, poetry reading etc). 8:30pm and all welcome Tuesdays

Old Anchor Inn OPEN MIC NIGHT 8:30pm all welcome Saturdays

Old Anchor Inn LIVE BANDS 9pm free DIDCOT

Saturday July 5

Cornerstone Arts MICHAEL LAW'S PICCADILLY REVELLERS 8pm £14.50/£13

Wednesday July 16 Cornerstone Arts DIDCOT GIRLS' SCHOOL SHOW: A NIGHT AT THE MOVIES 7.30pm £8/£6 Saturday July 19

Cornerstone Arts WORBEY AND FARRELL: DEVIATIONS ON THE PIANO 8pm £14.50/£13 FARINGDON

Thursday July 3

Swan at Faringdon FOLK NIGHT 8.30pm

Thursday July 10 Swan at Faringdon OPEN MIC (All acts welcome) PA provided. 8pm Saturday July 19 Swan at Faringdon RUSS PAYNE & THE SHARK DENTISTS 9pm Thursday July 24

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Swan at Faringdon OPEN MIC (All acts welcome) PA provided. 8pm OXFORD

Every Monday The Port Mahon OXFORD UKULELES WORKSHOP 8pm £5

Every Tuesday The White Rabbit OPEN MIC 8pm free Play for a drink! The James Street Tavern THE SPARK SIDE OF THE MOON 8.30pm free Every Wednesday Cape of Good Hope, The Plain OPEN MIC 8.30pm free TheJolly Postboys, Florence Park Road OPEN MIC 7.30pm free Every Thursday

Cape of Good Hope, The Plain LIVE LOUNGE CAPE 8.30pm free The Half Moon, St Clements SPARKY’S FLYING CIRCUS - Weekly open music, poetry and song session 9pm Free

Every Sunday The Crown, Cornmarket Street JAZZ AT THE CROWN with OXFORD JAZZ KITCHEN 4pm to 6pm free

The Half Moon, St Clements FOLK SESSION - A mix of folk led by Mick Henry. Open session, all welcome. 8pm Free The Harcourt Arms, Jericho HOAM OPEN MIC 8pm Free The Old Bookbinders Arms, Victor Street BOOKIE’S OPEN MIC hosted by Chris Padmore 8pm Free Tuesday July 1 Old Fire Station BARREL TRIO 7:30 pm - 10:00 pm £8 / £6

Thursday July 3 Cellar Bar, Frewin Court HALLS + BALLOON ASCENTS + THE SEA THE SEA 7:30 pm - 10:30 pm £6 Albion Beatnik Bookstore MOOGIEMAN AND THE MASOCHISTS + LAURA THEIS (ROBOT SWANS) + STUART NOAH 8pm - 11pm £4 (advance) / £5 (door) Saturday July 5 Cellar Bar, Frewin Court WONK UNIT + DOWN & OUTS + GIRLPOWER 8pm - 11:00 pm

Wednesday July 9 O2 Academy Oxford THE DANDY WARHOLS 7pm - 11pm £15

O2 Academy 2 FATHERSON + MY GREY HORSE + JORDAN


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Fat Lil's MAETLOAF 8pm £8 / Door: £10

Saturday July 12 Perch IRREGULAR FOLK’S SUMMER SESSION 2pm 11pm £15 (advance) / £20 (door)

Saturday July 26 Fat Lil's DIRTY EARTH BAND 8pm Door: £5 New Inn THE WORRIED MEN 9pm free

Thursday July 10 O2 Academy Oxford JAMES 7pm £35

Friday July 18 O2 Academy 2 MIKE DIGNAM 6pm - 10pm £9 (standard) / £25 (VIP) Saturday July 19 O2 Academy 2 THE MIDNIGHT BEAST 6pm - 10pm £12.50

Monday July 28 Jericho Tavern Famous Monday Blues presents DEBBIE BOND BAND (USA) 9pm £12 Thursday July 31 St John the Evangelist Church SARAH JAROSZ 7:30 pm £15adv £17dr WANTAGE

WITNEY

Saturday July 5 Fat Lil's EYECON 8pm £4 Mod cover band. Friday July 11

Fat Lil's KINGS OF LYON 8pm £7adv / Door: £8

Saturday July 19

Tuesday July 1 and Tuesday July 29 Swan QUIZ NIGHT 8.30pm £1 per person entry SPORTING EVENTSEVETNS

OXFORD

Sunday July 6

Oxpens Rec BIKE EVENTS LTD OXFORD CYCLE EVENT www.bike-events.com TALKS AND POETRY OXFORD

Friday July 4 Burton Taylor Studio ESSEX LION 7.30pm £10/£8

Saturday July 5 Old Fire Station ADVENTURES UNDER GROUND 10.30am A series of talks all about Alice in Wonderland as part of Alice's Day. Wednesday July 9 Burton Taylor Studio STORYSMITHS' RADICAL WOMEN 7.30pm £10/£8 THEATRE

Monday July 7 to Saturday July 12 New Theatre TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT 7.30pm with Weds and Sat matinee 2.30pm - £12.90 to £38 Thursday July 10 and Friday July 11 Burton Taylor Studio THE TIGER AND THE MOUSTACHE - Saikat Ahamed traces the journey of Hashi, his mother, and the emerging nation of Bangladesh. Friday July 11 and Saturday July 12

Old Fire Station Twelfth Night 7.30pm £12/£10 presented by MadCap Theatre Productions Tuesday July 15 North Wall Arts Centre AUTHENTIC PERFORMANCE ACADEMY APA Summer Showcase 7.30pm £8/£5 Tuesday July 22 to Sunday August 3 Bodleian Library KING LEAR 7.45pm £22/£20 Old Schools Quadrangle Bodleian Library | Playhouse Plays Out Thursday July 24 to Saturday July 26 Old Fire Station THE CAP AND BELLS 7.30pm £13/£11 Monday July 28 to Sunday August 3

New Theatre BUDDY 7.30pm check times and prices

DIDCOT

Tuesday July 1

Cornerstone Arts YOUTH THEATRE SHOWCASE 7pm £5 OXFORD

Tuesday July 1 to Thursday July 3 Burton Taylor Studio A QUARTET OF CHEKHOV FARCES 9pm £6/£4

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The List

Saturday July 12 Fat Lil's WOLFBAIT 8pm £4 comedy rock cover band.

FARINGDON

New Theatre WE CAN SING A RAINBOW 7pm £23.90

Music

Saturday July 5 Swan at Wantage REGGAE NIGHT with The Erin Bardwell Collective 9pm Free

QUIZ NIGHTS

Sunday July 6

Arts & Culture

Friday July 25 Cellar Bar, Frewin Court ABSOLVA + GODSBANE 7pm – 10.30pm / £4 adv £5 otd Wheatsheaf, High Street Gappy Tooth Industries presents ELOISE REES + THE PINK DIAMOND REVUE +WARDENS 20.20 – 23.00 £4.50 on the door

Sunday July 27 Fat Lil's MONTHLY BLUES JAM 3pm Free

Thursday July 3 to Saturday July 5 Pegasus Theatre JAMBOREE: ONE CITY, MANY VOICES 6.30pm (Saturday matinee 1.30pm) -Pegasus Youth Theatre annual summer showcase £7, £5, concs., £4 U18s Oxford Playhouse IDYLLS OF THE KING - Times vary £17/£13

Food and Drink

Pegasus Theatre REINS 7pm - The latest showcase of Oxfordshire’s young bands presented by Pegasus and Oxfordshire Music Education Partnership £3 in advance £4 on the door Oxford Playhouse STACEY KENT 7.30pm £22/£19/£15/£13

Friday July 25 Fat Lil's THE STONES 8pm £8 / Door: £10

Thursday July 3 to Friday July 4 Old Fire Station WHAT BECAME OF HARLEY WARREN? 7.30pm £10/£8

For Starters

O’SHEA (& THE COMMONWEALTH) + ECHOIC 7pm £6


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The List

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

For Starters

Pewsey Music Festival - Saturday August 2 Pewsey Music Festival 2014 features the usual colourful melding of genres we’ve come to expect from this bijou gem since its inception in 2007. Headliners The John E Vistic Experience won the American Independent Music Award 2005 for their song Riverboat Blues. They also won the Rockstar ’09 competition and were the first confirmed band for Glastonbury 2010. They wowed the crowd there again last year. They are known for their raucous rock ’n’ roll and unrelenting live performance. The Rockingbirds are the UK’s most authentic take on Americana, with melodies and harmonies which have converted seasoned country doubters. Ultimate Elton & The Rocket Band won Official UK No 1 at the National Tribute Awards 2013. And even the real Elton’s producer and sound engineer, Clive Franks, was impressed. Chaklive are flying over from

Mexico specifically to play. They are renowned for frontman Chak’s beautiful and lyrical songwriting, and their flair for getting the crowd up and dancing. British Harlem have the seeds of stadium rock sown into every aspect of their being, from their songs to their engaging, selfassured live performances. AJ Live, led by AJ Mayhew – who played at Pewsey back in 2009 with Beatbullyz – are a funky reggae-influenced group, with AJ’s everyday chitchat rap flowing reassuringly over catchy tunes, and an inclusive energy which will make you dance. On Deaf Ears have a worldly wisdom to their lyrics and music, with songs about the madness of evil, god, death, love and whisky. A second, showcase stage will feature performances from six local up-and-coming acts. Two stilt-walkers will patrol the site as “the tall bouncers”. Mad Pete will entertain the children with

Avebury Rocks and rolls! This year’s Avebury Rocks takes place on Sunday July 13 and as usual organiser and musical genius Nick Harper hasn’t pulled any punches pulling together a stellar line-up. Joining Nick in the line-up is The ever excellent Gabby Young (pictured), Jon Gomm with his revolutionary virtuoso guitar style, Rev Hammer, playing songs from the album Freedom John, and others from his long catalogue of songwriting gems and the local boy that everyone is talking

The John E Vistic Experience

his balloon animals and magic show. And there will be something inflatable for kids to play on. This being Pewsey, local arts and crafts will be a key character element of the day, with sculpting, thatching, knitting and spinning. There will also be various stalls, a beer tent and food stalls. Advance tickets cost £10. On the day tickets cost £15. Entry is free to under-12s. Tickets are available from Sound Knowledge in Marlborough, and in Pewsey from Wessex Print Centre, The Cooper’s Arms, The Crown Inn and The Waterfront or www.pewseymusicfestival.org

Sharon Lewis

Enchanting songstress Sharon Lewis will be playing The Cellar Bar The Bear in Devizes in Market Place about George Wilding. on Friday July 18. As always the festival will be The evening of sublime raising money for Prospect acoustic music kicks off from Hospice and will include a charity 8pm and tickets £5. walk before the music kicks off. She will perform her For more details visit heartfelt songs on piano, guitar www.aveburyrocks.org and ukulele. 56


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ART EXHIBITIONS & CRAFT WORKSHOPS Wednesdays Riffs Bar, Greatfield ART CLASSES WITH MIKE YORK 18:30 to 20:30

Fridays Riffs Bar, Greatfield CAFE @ RIFFS 10am - 2pm - Crafty Coffee Morning!

Friday July 25 to Monday July 28

Wyvern Theatre DANNY LA RUE-DRESS DISPLAY during opening hours CABARET

SWINDON

COMEDY

CHIPPENHAM

First Sunday of every month Old Road Tavern COMEDY CLUB 8pm SALISBURY

SWINDON

Monday July 7 The Vic THE OCELOT COMEDY CLUB with ZOE LYONS + ANDREW WATTS + JOHN PENDAL + RICHARD TODD + MATTHEW BAYLIS 8pm Free DANCE

SWINDON

Saturdays

AZUZA, Hughendon Yard Tel - 01672 513380 TOP DJS 11pm to 3am £3 before midnight £4 after SALISBURY

Friday July 11 The Music Box HARDCORE RAVEOLUTION 5TH BIRTHDAY BASH10pm FAMILY EVENTS

Saturday July 26 Lydiard House and Park BIG SWINDON EVENT 3pm til late £15 FOR SMASH AND CANCER RESEARCH UK Lydiard Park Conference CentreArts/music/family fun TROWBRIDGE

Friday July 25 to Sunday July 27 Westbury White Horse Country Park VILLAGE PUMP FOLK FESTIVAL with PEATBOG FAERIES + SETH LAKEMAN plus loads more FILMS

MARLBOROUGH

Thursday July 17

SALISBURY

Saturday July 5 Salisbury Arts Centre MOON MAN 11am £4/£3 - A quirky children's animation based on the picture book by award winning children's authoer Tomi Ungerer. Wednesday July 30

Salisbury Arts Centre IMAGINATION ADVENTURES BOOK CLUB 10.15am free - A book club for children aged 3 - 7 years. SWINDON

Sunday July 13 Wyvern Theatre ALIENS LOVE UNDERPANTS 1.30pm and 3.30pm £13.50 Saturday July 26 Wyvern Theatre OLD MCDONALD HAD A FARM 2.30pm £9.50/£8.50 FESTIVALS

MALMESBURY

Thursday July 24 to Sunday July 27 Charlton Park WOMAD - World music festival MARLBOROUGH

Friday July 18 to Sunday July 20 Venues across Marlborough

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Marlborough Town Hall THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL (15) presented by Marlborough Downs Live and Marlborough Downs Movies 7.30pm £5adv £6dr - Box office www.kvat.co.uk or White Horse Bookshop or Sound Knowledge Friday July 18 Theatre on the Hill THE LEGO MOVIE £3 children, £5 adults 6.30pm - Box office www.kvat.co.uk or White Horse Bookshop or Sound Knowledge SALISBURY

Thursday July 3

Salisbury Arts Centre THE PATIENCE STONE 9.10pm £7/£6 - Based on the novel by Afghan-born Atiq Rahimi, The Patience Stone is a bold and uplifting story of one woman's resolve to break free from silence and oppression. Sunday July 13 Salisbury Arts Centre THE EPIC OF EVEREST 7.30pm £7/£6 - A remarkable film record of the legendary Everest expedition of 1924 restored by the BFI National Archive and accompanied by a newly commissioned score.

Tuesday July 22 Salisbury Arts Centre KISS THE WATER 7.30pm £7/£6 - Weaving seamlessly between cinematic documentary and hand-painted animation, Kiss the Water tells the story of one woman's passion for the

The List

Wednesday July 9 Wyvern Theatre TO LIVE IS TO DANCE 7pm £12/£9

AZUZA, Hughendon Yard Tel - 01672 513380 TOP DJS 11pm to 2.30am only £2 all night. Drink promos...

Music

Friday July 18 Salisbury Arts Centre Edinburgh Comedy Preview with TOMMY ROWSON & GARETH RICHARDS 8pm £9/£7 - Enjoy a taste of the Edinburgh Fringe Festival right here in Salisbury.

SWINDON

DJ NIGHTS/PARTY NIGHTS

Friday July 25 to Saturday July 26 Greenacres Farm, Rockbourne SAUSAGE FEST 2014 - Salisbury's brand new music festival. For details, visit www.sausagefestival.webs.com.

Arts & Culture

Monday July 7 Wyvern Theatre MONDAY NIGHT MAGIC in the Wyvern Restaurant 7pm £10/£8.50

MARLBOROUGH Fridays

SALISBURY

Food and Drink

Tuesday July 1 to Saturday July 5 Wyvern Theatre WHY WE WENT TO WAR -EXHIBITION 10am - An exhibition at the Wyvern Theatre from Wiltshire Soldiers will be avaliable for patrons to attend from an hour and a half before every performance of Birdsong.

MARLBOROUGH INTERNATIONAL JAZZ FESTIVAL

For Starters

SWINDON

Saturday July 19 Wyvern Theatre FITZGRAHAM ACADEMY OF DANCE 1pm and 6.30pm £12.50/£9 Join the students of FitzGraham Academy of Dance on a magical journey through the sometimes “Grimm” world of fairy tales.


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magical art of creating fishing flies.

Food and Drink

For Starters

SWINDON

Thursday July 17 Old Town Bowl GREASE 7pm Friday July 18 Old Town Bowl LEON 7pm

Wyvern Theatre MONTY PYTHON'S LIFE OF BRIAN 7.30pm £12.50 includes buffet in the Wyvern Restaurant Saturday July 19 Town Gardens Bowl THE LOST BOYS - Tickets are £12.50 for standard seating or £14.50 for deckchairs Friday July 25

Wyvern Theatre THOSE WERE THE DAYS MY FRIENDS! 7.30pm £11 - A film journey through the past GIGS AND CONCERTS

ASHTON KEYNES

First Sunday of the month

Arts & Culture

White Hart OPEN MIC NIGHT 8pm free BRADFORD ON AVON Tuesday July 1

The Swan BRADFORD ON AVON FOLK CLUB PRESENTS SINGAROUND - Floor spots. Free entry. 8pm.

Tuesday July 8 The Swan BRADFORD ON AVON FOLK CLUB PRESENTS THE REAL RAJ - outstanding singer/ songwriter & multi-instrumentalist. Floor spots. Free 8pm

Music

Thursday July 10 The Swan BLUES NIGHT 8.30pm free

Tuesday July 15 The Swan BRADFORD ON AVON FOLK CLUB PRESENTS SINGAROUND Floor spots. Free entry. 8pm. Saturday July 19 Mount Pleasant Social Club THE CLEYHILL STOMPERS 9pm £5 Tuesday July 22

The List

The Swan BRADFORD ON AVON FOLK CLUB PRESENTS CHRIS WESTON - a great new young talent. Floor spots. Free entry. 8pm. Tuesday July 29 The Swan BRADFORD ON AVON FOLK CLUB PRESENTS

SWEET MISERY – expect Americana from one of our favourite local duos. Floor spots. Free entry. 8pm.

Thursday July 31 The Swan BLUES NIGHT 8.30pm free CALNE Saturday July 5

The Wheatsheaf THE WORRIED MEN 9pm free

Tuesday July 29 David Ryder Jazz Club, Marden House ALFRESCO presented by CALNE JAZZ CLUB 7 for 7.30pm £7 CHIPPENHAM

Second Sunday of the month Old Road Tavern FRENCH OPEN FOLK SESSION 8pm free Third Sunday of the month

Old Road Tavern OPEN FOLK SESSION 8pm free Fourth Sunday of the month Old Road Tavern OPEN MIC NIGHT 8pm free DEVIZES

Friday July 4

Bear Hotel, Market Place INNES SIBUN BAND – Cellar Bar – Doors 8pm – Music 9pm - £5 Sunday July 6 Bear Hotel, Market Place JAZZ SUNDAY LUNCH in Bear Grills Bistro & Bar – Noon – 2.30pm- book your table with Reception – 01380 722444 Friday July 11

Bear Hotel, Market Place BLUES REVIEWD in the Cellar Bar – Doors 8pm – Music 9pm- £5 Friday July 18

Bear Hotel, Market Place SHARON LEWIS in the Cellar Bar – Doors 8pm –Music 9pm - £5 The Lamb Inn, Devizes ADAM BOUCHER w/ LUCY BROWN + tba Free entry. 8.30pm - 11pm.

Saturday July 19 St Mary's Church PROFESSOR ELEMENTAL (Chap Hop) w/ Corky & DJ Tikky (Electro Swing set) £9 adv. £13 otd. 16+. 8.30pm - 11.30pm. Thursday July 31 Bear Hotel, Market Place OPEN MIC NIGHT – 7pm – Free Entry MARLBOROUGH

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First Friday of the month Marlborough Football club OPEN MIC NIGHT 8pm free (except Jan)

Saturday July 5 Green Dragon THE TINSHACK BAND 9pm free - POP, ROCK, INDIE COVERS Saturday July 12 Green Dragon BI POLAR BEARS 9pm free DUO PLAYING 50S TO TODAY Saturday July 19 Green Dragon CORSAIRS 9pm free PSYCHOBILLY /PUNKABILLY

Saturday July 26 Green Dragon HAMSTERS FROM HELL 9pm free ROCK/ BLUES/SKA/REGGAE/PUNK MELKSHAM

Saturday July 12 King George V Playing Field, Lowbourne THE AK POETS at Party in the Park (afternoon) As part of Melksham Music Festival Pilot THE AK-POETS 9pm free PEWSEY

Friday July 18 Coopers Arms THE WORRIED MEN 9pm free ROYAL WOOTTON BASSETT

Saturday July 5 Waggon and Horses DYLEGANS 9pm free FOLK/ COUNTRY/ SKIFFLE

Saturday July 12 Waggon and Horses KEVIN LOVATT AS JOHNNY CASH TRIBUTE 9pm free TRIBUTE TO JOHNNY CASH Saturday July 19 Waggon and Horses LILY B 9pm free ACOUSTIC ROCK/POP COVERS

Saturday July 26 Waggon and Horses OVER THE LIMIT 9pm free DUO PLAYING A VARIETY SALISBURY

Wednesday July 2 Salisbury & South Wiltshire Sports Club JULIAN VELARD, the internationally acclaimed Singer and Songwriter from Brooklyn NY 8pm. £13 Salisbury Arts Centre


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HOMEGROWN PERFORMANCE 8pm - A celebration of the growing talent emerging from Salisbury Arts Centre. Salisbury Arts Centre TOMMY ANDREWS QUINTET ALBUM LAUNCH TOUR 8pm £12/£8 - The Tommy Andrews Quintet perform material from their debut album ‘The Crux’. Winchester Gate THE SPLASH + VIBROSCOPE + LUKE HALL 8.30pm free

Friday July 11 Salisbury Arts Centre THE REVEREND PEYTON'S BIG DAMN BAND 8pm £12/£10 - A raucous night of fingerpickin' and scrubboard scratchin' from the legendary Reverend Peyton and his Country, Blues and Rockabilly trio. Salisbury Jazz Club, Livestock Market SOLENT CITY JAZZMEN 7.30pm £10 on door

Saturday July 12 Salisbury Arts Centre LIVE LUNCH: JACK HARRIS - midday freeFolk and Blues inspired song and storytelling adorned with intricate fingerstyle guitar and smoky soulful vocals. Wig and Quill NOT DEAD YET 9pm free Five Bells MUDEFORD CRABS 9pm free

Wednesday July 16

Winchester Gate SALISBURY OPEN MIC 8.30pm free Old Ale House BOPPIN' B + DICK VENOM & THE TERRORTONES 9pm free

Saturday July 26 Salisbury Arts Centre HIJACK ALL DAYER midday free - Salisbury's Largest Youth Arts Festival returns with bands, comedy and loads of great workshops. Duck Inn, Laverstock LADY WINWOODS MAGGOT 9pm free Sunday July 27

Salisbury Arts Centre LIVE LUNCH: JAMES DAUBNEY Midday free A modern approach to the acoustic guitar with essences of Classical Roots combined with Flamenco techniques. Salisbury City Hall EELS Perform Live In Concert 7pm

SEEND

Wednesday July 2 Seend Acoustic Club AMI KAELYN - singer, guitarist & cellist. Support from blues-man KEVIN BROWN. £4. Floor singers welcome. 8pm SWINDON

Wednesdays The Vic WACKY WEDNESDAY 8.30pm free

Riffs Bar, Greatfield BLUEGRASS JAM Free entry. starts at 7:30pm. Thursdays

Riffs Bar, Greatfield CROONER NIGHT WITH STEVEN COLEMAN bringing the Rat Pack to Riffs! 8pm Fridays Riffs Bar, Greatfield THE ACOUSTIC SESSIONS with featured artists and Open Mic, starts at 19:30. Free Tuesday July 1

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Saturday July 5 The Vic GUNS 2 ROSES 8pm £7adv £8dr Rolleston KOK ROK 9pm free 80S KOK ROCK Woodlands Edge COVER ADDICTS 9pm free POP,ROCK,INDIE COVERS Sunday July 6

Old Town Gardens Bandstand LAZY SUNDAY AFTERNOON WITH MR LOVE & JUSTICE & FRIENDS 5pm-7pm Wednesday July 9 The Vic GNARWOLVES + 2 SICK MONKEYS + THE REBECCA RIOTS 8pm £7adv £10dr Thursday July 10

Wyvern Theatre GIMME GIMME GIMME 7.30pm £17 - ABBA tribute show Rolleston BOOT LED ZEPPELIN SPECIAL ACOUSTIC SHOW 9pm free

Friday July 11 Wyvern Theatre THE DRIFTERS 7.30pm £25 The Vic The Ultimate JOHNNY CASH Tribute! 8pm £7adv £8dr Moonrakers THE AK-POETS 9pm free Rolleston LEWIS CREAVEN BAND 9pm free - BLUES ROCK Saturday July 12

The List

Friday July 18 Winchester Gate BLACK RUSH + PUGWALL 8.30pm free Qudos BREAK COVER 9pm free

Winchester Gate BANDS TO BE ANNOUNCED 8.30pm, FREE

Friday July 4 The Vic THE COMPUTERS + ALL EARS AVOW + SCOUT KILLERS 8pm £10 New Inn THE AK-POETS 8.30pm free Castle, Prospect Place CATCH 22 9pm free POP, ROCK, INDIE COVERS Rolleston MAD APPLE CIRCUS 9pm free - mix of ska/hip-hop/jazz, with swing and reggae influences

Music

Sunday July 13 Salisbury Arts Centre LIVE LUNCH: MARY SPENDER Midday free - A Bristol-based musician whose latest single reached no.2 in the iTunes singer songwriter chart.

Friday July 25 Fisherton Mill KINGS OF LOUNGE DUO - Dining Evening with live music- A set-price four course menu priced at £42.50 per person. Delicious food & fine wine. Tables available for a 7.30pm, 8.00pm or 8.30pm sitting

Wednesday July 2 Swindon Arts Centre RAY DANCE AND JUDITH SHARP - A HANDFUL OF SONGS £9/£8 7.30pm with 2.30pm Saturday matinee

Arts & Culture

Winchester Gate LUMP + RELEASE THE MONKEY SAUSAGEFEST WARM-UP 8.30pm free

Sunday July 20 Salisbury City Hall SALISBURY AREA YOUNG MUSICIANS SUMMER CONCERT 4pm

Wyvern Theatre MILITARY WIVES AT THE BANDSTAND 7PM

Food and Drink

Saturday July 5 Salisbury City Hall NIGEL KENNEDY 7:30 pm Wig and Quill SPIDERPIG 9pm free

Salisbury Arts Centre SALISBURY CONCERT BAND 7.30pm £5/£2.50 Royal George Inn NOT DEAD YET 9pm - Free entry

For Starters

Friday July 4

Saturday July 19


For Starters

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The Vic FELIX AND THE FUNK 8pm free Rolleston THE BLOX 9pm free TRIBUTE TO IAN DURY & THE BLOCKHEADS Woodlands Edge THE SHOO FLIES 9pm free POP,ROCK,INDIE COVERS Sunday July 13 Castle, Prospect Place DYLEGANS - FOLK/COUNTRY/SKIFFLE starts 6pm free

The List

Music

Arts & Culture

Food and Drink

The Vic MOTHERLOAD + SUPPORT TBC 8pm £3 Tuesday July 15 Swindon Arts Centre PATRICK STREET 8pm £16

Friday July 18 The Vic HAMSTERS FROM HELL 8pm free Rolleston HUMDINGER 9pm free POP,ROCK,INDIE COVERS Level 3 TIDES OF CHANGE FAREWELL SHOW FEATURING ALL EARS AVOW - LIBERTO WOLF - NATURES. £4 adv/£5 on door. Tickets available at The Rolleston & via www.facebook.com/dreddedvyruspromotion Saturday July 19 The Vic HOT RED CHILLI PEPPERS 8pm £6 Rolleston GOING UNDERGROUND 9pm free SKA PUNK MOD

Woodlands Edge THE TINSHACK BAND 9pm free POP, ROCK, INDIE COVERS

Sunday July 20 The Vic THE VIC GRAND FINAL ANNUAL KARAOKE COMPETITION. 8pm free with a top prize of £150! Friday July 25 The Vic BANDS & BURLESQUE 8pm £5adv £6dr The Messenger DAN & ADAM (feat Dan from Ocean Colour Scene) 9pm free Rolleston LILY B 9pm free ACOUSTIC ROCK/POP COVERS Saturday July 26 The Vic U2-2 8pm £6adv £8dr Brookhouse Farm CORSAIRS 9pm free - PSYCHOBILLY/

PUNKABILLY Rolleston MOONSHINE STALKERS PLUS THE DOPPELGANGERS 9pm free PSYCHOBILLY NIGHT Royal Oak, Newport Street FLY ON THE WALL 9pm free CLASSIC ROCK COVERS Woodlands Edge THE DARK EYES 9pm free ROCK/POP/INDIE COVERS Tuesday July 29

The Vic OPEN MIC NIGHT 8pm free

Thursday July 31 The Vic THE BROMPTON MIX + BURNTHRU + TBC 8pm £3

TROWBRIDGE

Saturday July 12 White Swan THE WORRIED MEN 9pm free ROCK N ROLL BINGO

SWINDON

Saturday July 12 Wyvern Theatre ROCK N ROLL BINGO 7:30 PM in the Wyvern Restaurant TALKS AND POETRY

SWINDON

Saturday July 5 Wyvern Theatre LEARN ABOUT YOUR FAMILY AND THE GREAT WAR 12:30 PM Monday July 7 Wyvern Theatre AN AUDIENCE WITH CHRIS PACKHAM 7.30pm £17 THEATRE

SALISBURY

Tuesday July 8 Salisbury Arts Centre FULL FATHOM FIVE 10.30am free - from Exeter House Special School and The Valley Unit at Woodford Valley Primary Academy Monday July 21 to Saturday July 26 Studio Theatre LADIES' DAY a comedy by Amanda Whittington 7.30pm Tickets £10/£8 from 01722 34280 www.studiotheatre.org.uk Monday July 21 Salisbury Arts Centre

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Bootleg Theatre present... DEAL WITH IT 7.45pm £7

Wednesday July 30 Salisbury Arts Centre IN OUR PLACE 8pm free - A multi-media performance that brings to life the soul of a Wiltshire military community. SWINDON

Tuesday July 1 to Saturday July 5 Wyvern Theatre BIRDSONG times vary Friday July 4

Lydiard House and Park The Tempest 7.30pm £14/£10 - Lydiard Park Open Air Theatre Sunday July 6 The Vic TS Theatre Productions presents.... #THEORDER 7.30pm £7

Wyvern Theatre JANICE THOMPSON ANNIVERSARY GALA CONCERT 7.30pm £12/£10 Tuesday July 8 Wyvern Theatre WILKES ACADEMY 7pm £15/£10

Saturday July 12 Swindon Arts Centre RISING ASPIRATIONS ACADEMY OF PERFORMING ARTS - A celebration of song, drama and dance featuring children aged three to sixteen -11am to 3pm Monday July 14

Swindon Arts Centre STAGECOACH 8pm £10/£8

Tuesday July 15 to Wednesday July 16 Wyvern Theatre Isambard School ANNUAL MUSICAL PRODUCTION 7.30pm £7.50/35

Friday July 18 Wyvern Theatre THOROUGHLY MODERN MUSICALS In support of St. Michael's Hospice & Great Ormond Street Hospital. 7.30pm £15/£13 Friday July 25

Lydiard House and Park MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING 7.30pm £14/£10 Lydiard Park Open Air Theatre THEATRICAL SCREENINGS

MARLBOROUGH

Wednesday July 23 Marlborough Town Hall NT live encore Skylight 7pm £15 in advance £17.50 on door available from The White Horse Bookshop Sound Knowledge or www.kvat.co.uk


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Agony Girl

Everybody’s favourite advice columnist!

Seven-year-old Agony Girl is obsessed with her iPad Mini she got for her birthday but she still has time to help with your problems. We read her the questions and these are her answers. Honest!

DEAR ANNABEL I think I might be addicted to Facebook. I can’t get off it. I’m permanently on there looking through people’s pictures and laughing at their statuses. The other night I even went on there in the middle of the night and I couldn’t remember doing it in the morning. Have I got a problem and what should I do? Rachel, Marlborough Try not to go on it. Spend more time with your girls and playing with your son. Board games are good. Taking photos. They’re all good things. DEAR ANNABEL I just watched a film called We Bought A Zoo. I really liked it. If you bought a zoo what animals

would you put in it? Adam, Reading A seal, because they can clap and splash everywhere and they’re my favourite little sea animal. A meerkat, because they are cute and they like digging for insects. A snake hut because snakes can live it because we have to look all sorts of animals even the slithery ones. A whale and a polar bear and a penguin and a fox and an ocelot.

DEAR ANNABEL My sister in law wears so much fake tan that it makes her look like a Chernobyl refugee. She glows. It’s not a problem but now she’s fallen out with my wife because she’s got a natural tan and doesn’t look like the inside of a Jaffa

Twisted Peel (www.twistedpeel.com)

Next month’s issue..

Cake. How can I tell my sister in law to stop painting herself with this horrible orange paint as it makes her look like one big walking around Wotsit without insulting her? Jed, Abingdon Kick them out the house and throw their orange paint away. Tell her that she looks horrible and that she looks like a Wotsit. DEAR ANNABEL I’ve just had a new baby. Any advice? Emma, Trowbridge Get a cot. Paint the baby’s room. Feed it milk. Play with it. Let it draw. Send your questions to stuff@theocelot.co.uk

by Peter Roy

gust 1st is out on Au


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Ocelot97 23/06/2014 15:27 Page 64


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