Ocelot 128 february 2017 final artwork

No: 128 February 2017

Wiltshire, Oxfordshire and West Berkshire Edition

The Ocelot Spring Curtain Raiser

Free

Your comprehe nsive theatre g uide for the ne xt few months p 31

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/ STYLE / EATS / BREWS / SCREEN / TECH 23/01/2017 19:08

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#128

FEBRUARY ISSUE

For Starters

04 Michael Bosley + Luke Coleman 06 Encyclopaedia Oceloticca 07 Running for my life 08 The Bassett Rivers Echo Lifestyle

10 Get A Life 12 Get Away 15 Motoring 16 Style 19 Tech 20 Screenzone Brews and Eats

24 Dan’s Restaurant 25 Devizes Winter Beer Festival 26 Brewery Bird meets the landlord 27 Recipe 28 History of Cake Arts and Culture

31 The Ocelot Spring Curtain Raiser 43 Faust Squared 44 Journey of Imagination 46 Dancin’ Oxford 48 Mitch Benn & Carl Donnelly 50 Swindon Fringe Festival Music

52 Gig Monkey Review 53 Next month at the O2 Academy 54 The Ocelot Presents...

56 Live Music News 58 The Gig List The Final Bit of the magazine

62 Agony Girl and toon

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All the world’s a stage!

It’s definitely looking like 2017 will be pretty damn dramatic.

And I’m not talking about the fact that Donald Trump is now President of the United States!

Well I hope not anyway.

No. I’m talking about the theatres of Ocelotshire from Salisbury to Newbury and from Swindon to Oxford as they’ve got loads going on.

We give you our Spring Curtain Raiser in this edition. It’s been a lot of hard work to make this comprehensive list but it’s been so worth it.

Where else are you going to find out what you can catch at the theatre over the next few months all in one place?

As always the magazine includes loads of other stuff including Bassett Rivers on page 8 which was back last month after a two year hiatus.

I’m still Running for my Life in the most exhausting column I’ve ever had to write for this magazine on page 7. And we also look at what’s what in the music scenes with some pretty exciting stuff heating up all over the shop at the moment.

2016 was pretty depressing overall but we’ve got high hopes for 2017 as it’s all looking pretty exciting from our end. It’s just a case of looking on the bright side! We’re reintroducing a letters page next month and would love to hear your thoughts. Write in to me at jamie@theocelot.co.uk

Jamie Hill

Editor: Jamie Hill - jamie@theocelot.co.uk Deputy: Ben Fitzgerald - ben@theocelot.co.uk Listings: Mike Barham - mike@theocelot.co.uk Sales: Dave Stewart dave@theocelot.co.uk - 07872 176999 Rosy Presley rosy@theocelot.co.uk 07717 501790 Telephone: 01793 781986 Publisher: Positive Media Group, Unit 3, Arclite House, Peatmoor, Swindon SN5 5YN Printers: Stephens & George, Merthyr Tydfil 23/01/2017 19:08

For Starters

Cool Runnings A Nerd’s Last Word by Michael Bosley

The prospect of venturing anywhere outdoors in the UK between the months of November and February are about as appealing as a prostate exam. Everything is wet, cold, dark, miserable, closed for winter and with icy roads, flooding and snow to contend with, probably trying to kill you as well.

The very idea that anyone would venture out there for exercise is even more baffling. But before you’re tempted to hunker up on a treadmill in a warm gym somewhere, let me try and convince you that outdoor running can actually be enjoyable: 1. Other people aren’t around This is a big plus for me. Not just because I’m a social hermit with the charm of a butternut squash, but because people tend to get in the way. Summer is prime time for people to take to the country and mince around – on bikes, hikes, picnics, walking their thousands of uncontrollable dogs. Winter alleviates this somewhat, making for some serene, peaceful morning runs when everyone else is tucked up indoors.

2. Warm gear is your friend If you dress right, there’s no reason running in the winter need be any more uncomfortable than summer running.

I have the physique of a stickman, which means I feel a chill even when someone breathes near me, so I always wear thermal leggings, thermal tops, hat and gloves as

well as two pairs of socks when necessary. Gloves are a godsend and great for keeping the chill off when charging headlong into an icy gale.

3. Give it time The first mile or so will be quite awful. Your body hasn’t warmed up yet and you’ll feel stiff and ungainly. Every cell in your body will be urging you back toward the warm bed you inexplicably crawled out of, whilst the glow of cozy lights from passing homes will be unbearable. But, assuming you’ve paid attention to point 2, your body’s internal boiler will suddenly kick in - you’ll feel blood return to your extremities and you’ll feel like you could go on for hours.

4. English winters can be beautiful I’m not going to try and convince you that skeletal trees, grey skies and mud are ever going to make it onto the Countryfile calendar, but you’ll get those rare, crisp mornings when the sky is as blue as your fingertips (see point 2), the dew hangs on the cobwebs like glass pearls and the frosty grass crunches under your feet and somehow, you suddenly don’t miss that musty old gym anymore.

5. You get to feel smug “I’ve already been for a run this morning” you can say, hands on hips, with deserved superiority when the rest of the family wake up, bleary eyed and sloping around the house in their dressing gowns, complaining how cold it is.

The deep wounds of conflict Off The Grid with Luke Coleman - Our man in Iraq

Mosul operations continue – as I write the Iraqi forces haven’t crossed onto the right bank, or western side of the city – questions about healing the deep wounds in the country and communities start to bubble to the surface, questions that are difficult to shape, let alone answer.

I have a particular focus. Young men and boys from the Yazidi community have been radicalised into fighting for two factions of the conflict.

Most alarmingly, significant numbers were kidnapped by ISIS, and have

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been brainwashed, discarding their ancient, syncretic faith and adopting the twisted version of Islam of their captors. Those who have returned are severely damaged. Anecdotes of older boys who have clearly raped members of their community given to them as gifts. Younger boys, some not yet 10 years old, threatening to kill their non-believer parents.

On the other side, and perhaps more understandably, many teenagers have signed up to the Kurdistan Workers’ Party, the PKK. The PKK and affiliates came to the aid of Yazidis trapped on Mount Shingal in August 2014, opening a corridor to safety in Syria. However,

there are reports of young people – male and female – finding it impossible to leave once they have signed up to the militia. With a strong philosophy that has evolved radically from its Marxist roots, many of those who have left the group come with new ideas, that are abrasive to such a closed community.

It’s a fascinating topic, and one that I hope to film over the coming months. This place really gets under your skin.

www.theocelot.co.uk

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Science Fact: Walking

by Ben Fitzgerald Walking is almost exactly like eating a donner kebab - it is best done by not thinking too deeply about what goes into it.

If you are able bodied, it’s very easy to take the act of walking for granted. Simply point your nose in the direction you want to go and… er walk.

Next time you go for a walk, try to think about exactly what you are doing. How do you set off, do you fall forwards and fling out a leg? What are you doing with your arms? How do you stop in the event of a small child crossing your path? Do you lean into a corner?

It’s utterly confusing once you try to identify all of the different factors in play.

Walking the dog, I got lost in thought about this vexing issue.

I totally forgot how to walk properly and was forced to make the return journey in the style of Madness on the cover of One Step Beyond.

When we walk, we create an inverted pendulum. With a regular pendulum the pivot is at the top and the mass is swinging around underneath. An inverted pendulum, in walking terms, is created when we plant a foot

Avoid this Madness at all costs

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Walk like a master - but perhaps put some clothes on?

on the ground (the pivot) and swing our weight over the top of it - rather like a pole vaulter - with the other foot swinging into position to become the new pivot as the weight transfers with smoothness indirectly proportional to the quantity of gin and tonic consumed.

The swing of a pendulum is really efficient. So walking like a pendulum should also be really efficient - as kinetic energy of motion turns into gravitational potential energy and back. At the top of its arc, the pendulum slows to a stop, but at that point the potential energy is at its peak.

As the pendulum falls back down, potential energy is converted back to kinetic energy. In a good pendulum, the conversion is close to 100 percent, with only a bit of energy lost to the friction of moving through the air and on the pivot.

One nudge, and a pendulum keeps swinging a long time.

Trouble is, we’re not very good at it. We lose a whopping 35 per cent of our energy as we stride forward purposefully - even birds

are more efficient, and they are sitting in the middle of the sky.

Apparently it’s because our muscles are pulling against each other, generating heat and also because we pause for a few milliseconds between swings, wasting precious energy.

One solution, it seems, is Namba Aruki - the speedy walking style of the Japanese messengers who operated during the Edo Period (1603-1868).

Their preferred walking style made their upper body more stable, kept their hips straight and didn’t require them to lift their entire body with their feet - this apparently made their walking movements more efficient.

The method involves bringing your left leg and left arm forward at the same time, then right arm and right leg, keeping your back straight and sort of rapidly shuffling along - yes, people might point at you and laugh as you glide through Morrisons like a Samurai; they might even say that you look a bit like a constipated duck... But you my friend can smile to yourself knowing that these fools are ticking along at a pretty paltry 65 per cent movement efficiency - whereas you are rocking a tasty 70 per cent plus.

Who’s laughing now?

Thanks to: Kuo, A. D. (2007). The six determinants of gait and the inverted pendulum analogy: A dynamic walking perspective. Hum Mov Sci, 26(4), 617-656.

Madness (One Step Beyond) 1979 Recorded Eden and TW, London.

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Running for my Life

It’s time for Grapefruit!

Last month Ocelot editor Jamie Hill, at an impressive 18 stone of fattiness, announced that he planned to lose three stone in six months and would be running the first ever Birmingham Marathon in October in aid of charity ICP Support. Here he lets us know how his first weeks have gone and what his plans for February involve.

By Jamie Hill I’m being haunted by a grapefruit. But more on that in a bit.

At the time of writing this I’m now three weeks into this year of living ridiculously and I’m definitely finding it harder and harder.

Knowing that the endgame is to turn this 18 stone slob of a middle-aged man into something resembling an athlete who could run the Birmingham Marathon on October 17 is a little scary.

As you can probably tell I’m finding this a tad difficult.

My weight has been yo-yoing like a bungee jumping kangaroo and I’m hungry a lot of the time. I’m also finding the exercising really hard at this early stage as my body groans back into life after a sedentary Christmas.

At 18 stone, I have a tyre in my middle. It’s not pleasant to look at but it also makes it really hard to bend over and move downwards in any way. Basically the tyre squeezes the air out of your lungs as you bend over. I’ve found myself gasping for breath on several occasions just from putting my shoes on.

It’s probably why I have a look of horror on my face if anyone asks me to take my shoes off when I come to their houses. Basically if they don’t have an adequate seating area for me to get my shoes on and off then I’ll just stand in the doorway instead looking a bit sheepish.

I want this tyre gone. I feel it there at all times of the day, threatening to pop buttons off shirts if I move in the wrong direction. It’s not good and I want my clothes to fit

properly again.

But most of all I want to bend down without feeling out of breath again.

On Monday January 30, I’m starting the ‘grapefruit’ diet for seven days.

This diet, which I did for a week last summer, is one of those fad diets which basically consists of eating lots of fruit and leaves me more hungry than a whole host of hungry caterpillars.

I’m dreading it and in my head I have this huge grapefruit following me around, taunting me and telling me that it’s going to get me. As you do.

So how have I done so far?

Well on January 1, I weighed 18 stone 4 pounds and had a waist measurement of 120cms.

And on January 22 I weighed 17 stone 11 pounds and had a waist measurement of 115cms.

So I actually achieved my goal in the first month which makes me smile like a feline from Cheshire but I also know that there’s a hell of a long way to go as my aim for February is to lose another half a stone.

You can keep up to date with my weekly blog at www. theocelot.co.uk to see how I’m getting on.

The Grapefruit Diet Breakfast

Lunch

Dinner

Fresh fruit - any amount

Tues Jan 31

1 dry slice toast & grilled or tinned tomato Grapefruit & 1 boiled egg

2 hard boiled eggs, salad & grapefruit Grilled steak & Salad

Mon Jan 30

Grilled chicken with tomatoes Dry toast

Weds Feb 1

Grapefruit & 1 boiled egg

Fresh fruit - any amount

Thurs Feb 2

1 slice dry toast

Fresh fruit - any amount

Fri Feb 3

1 slice dry toast

Fresh fruit - any amount

Sat Feb 4

1 glass of grapefruit juice

Fresh fruit - any amount

Sun Feb 5

Scrambled eggs & grilled or tinned tomatoes

2 poached eggs Spinach

2 Grilled lamb chops Salad & grapefruit 2 hard boiled eggs Salad & grapefruit Fresh fish & salad Grilled chicken Carrots & grapefruit Grilled steak & salad

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Bassett

The

Rivers Scary news for scary times...

Free Jeremy Corbyn mask

p65

Echo

Fake news sites hit Bassett Rivers

by Kit Chentable

Residents in Bassett Rivers are being warned to be on the lookout for fake news sites.

The sites have been reportedly appearing on social media as well as within regional entertainment and lifestyle magazines named after South American big cats.

An investigation has now been launched by Bassett Rivers Police into the veracity of every bit of news that has ever been heard.

Detective Inspector Malcom Ehard, who is leading the investigation, has released the following guidelines to help you spot fake news: - If a story makes you laugh or smile it must be fake.

As everybody knows there is no such thing as good news.

- If the bylines and the people quoted within the stories have stupid names it is a fake news story.

- If you are still confused about whether the story is real or not please check other sources to see if that story appears anywhere else.

- If you are still unsure please stop reading and ask a grown up.

- If a story involves Donald Trump although it might appear unbelievable it is probably true.

D.I Ehard said: “In this day and age it’s quite hard to know what is real and what is not.

“Fake news stories are becoming more and more common. I heard the other day in a news story that the human body is 50 to 65% made up of water but that’s so blatantly not true that it made me laugh as I’m not

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Staff at the fake news site The Wall Street Journal yesterday

some watery glug glug merman splashing around. I think I’d know.

“But it is hard to tell what is real and what is not. I mean is this story even real? Does Bassett Rivers even exist? Am I a real person? Am I making myself up in a made up newspaper underneath a picture of a fake Jeremy Corbyn mask?

“In my opinion none of it matters anyway as we are all simply experiencing the fabric of our reality being torn asunder as we are all just a fever dream of some crazed machine as part of the Matrix.

“How else do you explain Trump?”

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Experts uncertain whether I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter is actually butter or not Bassett Rivers MP Giles HetheringtonSmythe’s Monthly Column

Boffins in Bassett Rivers are calling for Unilever, who produce I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter, to clarify if the product is actually butter or not as they can’t believe it’s not butter.

Prof Dave Brainyman of Bassett Rivers Institute of Learning and Leadership (BRILL) said: “We’re utterly confused here at BRILL as we just can’t believe it’s not butter.

“This isn’t the first time that we’ve ended up being in this confused state especially after

one of our researchers ended up in Pets at Home the other day to find that the store did not involve pets at her own home address and the building was more of a warehouse than a home in the first place.

“She went next door to Poundland to find a similar thing as the actual store wasn’t a land made up of pound coins.

“I told her she was lucky that she didn’t venture into Toys R Us as it would have completely blown her mind.”

Vin Diesel’s Van Diesel Special fuel to help you get fast and furious...

As recommended by Van Morrison and Francis Ford Transit Available from Costalot Garage, High Street, Bassett Rivers

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Oh deary me! I’ve been tasked by my new UKIP master Paul Nuttall to give my life a bit of a jolly makeover in case those chaps in the press ever do any digging as apparently I employ too many European migrants which sends the wrong message. This has meant I’ve had to replace my entire household staff which was a real bally shame and caused a few tears I can tell you. So it was ‘Au Revoir’ to my chef Jean Claude. I will miss your tarte tatin.

His culinary expertise has now been replaced

by UKIP’s very own Gaz, who specialises in some new delicacy called a bacon butty which I can’t wait to try. He mentioned something about Daddy’s Sauce but I thought that sounded a bit rude so I said ‘no thank you’. It’s also meant I’ve had to say ‘Auf Wiedersehen’ to my masseuse Jurgen but Nuttall has assured me that Stella, his replacement, is an expert masseuse who has been working in a Liverpool back street for the past 20 years and always saw him right. He said this with a nudge and a wink which I went along with although I still don’t have the foggiest what he was inferring. I drew the line at getting rid of my Swedish nanny Olga though as life would just be horrific without her. Nuttall did ask why I needed her any more as all of my children are now grown up and have left home but I simply wouldn’t budge. I had no problem getting rid of Javier, my gardener, though as he made quite a mess of my rhododendrons last summer.

Let’s just hope that Bazza who has taken their place is as good at dealing with a snail infestation as he is at ranting about Merkel’s open door policy. Nuttall says that I should ignore his prison tattoos as that was only for a misunderstanding involving something called a ‘Molotov Cocktail’ and a mosque. I explained to Nuttall that I understood especially when it comes to alcoholic excess like this ‘cocktail’ as I once had a friend called Bertie who was arrested for weeing in the street after too many ales. I think my new staff will work out just fine. I’ll get used to their tattoos eventually.

Toodle pip!

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Get a Life

Cache and grab!

By Ben Fitzgerald Have you ever suspected that there’s something secret going on around you that is hidden just out of view?

That when people see you coming they quickly act ‘normal’ before resuming whatever the heck it was that they were doing before you turned up?

Well I’m here to tell you that your paranoid instincts are correct - and it’s happening even now while you read these words, probably behind your back.

There’s a hidden army of people out there walking among us, blending themselves into society, doing their best to appear like us - I’m not just talking about estate agents.

These people are geocachers and geocaching is what they do.

Geocaching, for the uninitiated, involves hunting for containers hidden in both urban and rural settings using satellite navigation data.

The pastime has grown hugely in popularity since the activity began 17 years ago. The idea was born out of the ready availability of smartphones and the removal of selective availability of Global Positioning Systems data on May 2 2000.

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GPS data beamed from American satellites was previously jealously guarded by the US military establishment. During the 1990s, GPS employed a feature called selective availability that degraded civilian accuracy on a global basis.

In May 2000, however, at the direction of President Bill Clinton, the U.S. government ended its use of selective availability in order to make GPS more responsive to civil and commercial users worldwide. Suddenly, the technology was no longer just a tool for guiding murderous cruise missiles down ventillation shafts it could also be used by nerds to set harmless puzzles.

My introduction to the world of geocaching came when I paid a visit to a friend of mine in Cambridge. Using his smartphone we and our children followed a compass tracker to put us in the general area of the hidden cache - somewhere on a bench.

We then had to furtively wait for the Russian spy sitting there to finish exchanging secrets with a Cambridge academic before he shifted himself so we could carry out a search. The idea is that you are not meant to give away the fact that you are looking for

a hidden container otherwise normal people (the geocaching community calls them muggles) could catch on.

It’s a great way to keep children busy, while you relax in the sunshine drinking beer.

Eventually one of the kids found the ingeniously hidden tiny magnetic container containing a roll of paper that you have to sign. The idea is that you take a sneaky picture on your phone to upload to the website to show that you have found it… without letting on to the muggles that it’s there. It sounds pretty pointless doesn’t it?

But then again I went for a walk up a series of Welsh mountains at the weekend and then came down again - that was also pointless but somehow brilliant.

Playing golf is even more pointless and incredibly tedious.

And as any French existentialist philosopher will tell you, pretty much everything we do is ultimately pointless…

So doing something that gets you outside in the fresh air fiddling around the underside of a park bench is pretty groovy in my book. Find out more at: www.geocaching.com

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Get Away

s t c i d d A n e e r c s for S

p i r T d a Ro

Hobbiton, also known as Matamata on New Zealand’s North Island

For the travel column this month, we asked Mike Barham to investigate the phenomenon that is “Film Tourism” and what makes people want to explore the world in search of film locations...

By Mike Barham Can’t get enough of your favourite TV shows and film franchises? Why not take a road trip to see where they were made – from Gilmore Girls in the US to The Hobbit in New Zealand.

That’s the rallying call for film addicts around the world, as more and more people take to travelling to see those iconic locations from their favourite movies.

Film tourism isn’t anything new. For instance, people have been visiting the Tunisian

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town of Matmata and the Hotel Sidi Driss since 1977, when it was used as the dugout, sand blasted home of Luke Skywalker in Star Wars Episode 4: A New Hope.

Don’t worry, they didn’t actually torch it, or any of the residents.

There are websites, such as AttractionTix.com, who specialise in pulling together road-trips for screen addicts looking to soak up every last moment of their favourite films and TV series, ranging from Downton Abbey to The Walking Dead and Game of Thrones, from Star Trek and Star Wars through to The Hobbit.

Speaking of Middle Earth, it’s common knowledge that the trilogy of films, and its sister trilogy Lord of the Rings, were predominantly filmed across the islands of New Zealand, taking in the most spectacular and breathtaking scenery the land had to offer.

The best time to head down under to experience this amazing landscape is between September and April, when the country is at its warmest during the summer months. Meaning you don’t get caught in too many sudden downpours and can enjoy walking the paths and national parks that criss cross New Zealand.

You can cover the 732 miles from the southern most shooting location to the most northern in just one day, although AttractionTix advise heading over for at least a week, due to the length of the journey to get there in the

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Get Away

first place from the UK! Starting at the Fiordland National Park which doubled as the mountainous regions in the first Hobbit film, you can head through Laketown, also known as Lake Pukaki, past Ruapehu which is also known as the Lonely Mountain, to Matamata on the North Island, which is immediately recognisable as The Shire due to many of the exterior sets being left in place for tourism.

But don’t think you have to travel halfway around the world to get your fill of movie magic. In fact, another type of magical journey awaits Harry Potter fans if you travel round our very own British Isles.

Starting in North London’s Claremont The New College Cloister s in Oxford Square, which doubled as Grimmauld Place, the headquarters for the Order of buildings the Phoenix, it’s a 218 mile journey through almost 10 used in the modern iterations of Star Trek are scattered counties to visit some of the iconic and historic locations across the west coast of the United States, but travelling used to film the eight Potter films. The trip includes down through California you can take in the Golden Gringotts Bank, also known as Australia House, taking in Gate bridge in San Francisco and the backdrop for the Harry Potter trail in Oxford which takes you through Starfleet HQ, whilst the internal shots for the 2009 film the New College Cloisters (or the Hogwarts school were filmed at the Getty Center in Los Angeles. You can corridors if you’re immersed in magic) and down to the also head to Vulcan itself by visiting the Vasquez Rocks, beach where Dobby the House-Elf lost his life in Wales. or how about to Veridian 3 by setting course for the An emotional yet magical journey that should serve as a deserts of Nevada to recreate the climactic scenes from brilliant long weekend for Potter fans.

Star Trek: Generations. Literally walking in the footsteps Of course, the sci-fi world can’t literally be filmed in of Picard and Kirk. And Malcolm McDowell. That’s got to space, and Trekkies around the world regularly travel to be worth it. the US in search of locations used in filming their beloved And if you sit on the other side of the sci-fi spectrum, Star Trek franchise.

Star Wars fans can cross the vast deserts of Tatooine in The iconic and futuristic just 258 miles in Tunisia. As we mentioned before, fans r Trek IV

te Bridge in Sta

The Golden Ga

of the series have often travelled to Sidi Driss to see the home of Luke Skywalker, but how about visiting the hive of scum and villainy itself; Mos Eisley? Well you’ll have to head for the small village of Ajim, but don’t expect to find the Millenium Falcon waiting for you. Further along the trail, Mos Espa rolls into view, also known as the town of Trozeur, and Ben Kenobi’s hermit pad lies just further still on Djerba, a small Tunisian island where you can relax and imagine watching that famous twin sunset.

And that’s the great thing about movies. Our imaginations can turn these amazing landscapes and buildings into other worlds and places of magic and mythological beings. AttractionTix have a concise guide to help plan your road trip: www.attractiontix.co.uk/filminglocations-maps

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Motoring

Skoda Octavia Scout – practical power and purpose

By Geoff Maxted of drivewrite.co.uk The Skoda range in general are competitively priced, well made and always surprisingly commodious. The Skoda Octavia Scout featured here is no different and is worthy of consideration, especially for country dwellers.

If you need a little more ground clearance and the benefits of intelligent four-wheel drive then the Scout is for you.

Don’t get carried away though. Although this is a name that conjures up visions of exploration and wilderness, the Octavia Scout is not a totally serious 4x4. Scout gets the automatic Haldex clutch system also found on the Octavia 4x4 estate. The test car came with 2.0L 181bhp diesel engine and a six-speed DSG auto gearbox with well-spaced ratios that suit the car’s performance. There are no paddles but extra control is available via a sequential shift on the gear lever.

There’s a choice of modes. Normal and Eco do as you would expect whilst Sport adapts the engine and steering to suit a ‘sporty driving style’. Sport is better when shifting manually. For general use though, I chose to keep it in Normal, but preferred the extra weighting of the Sport steering, selected via the Individual mode.

Overall I achieved a creditable 44mpg.

The Skoda Octavia Scout is practical, comfortable and versatile. The boot is immense and comes with a carpet lining that can be flipped to reveal a rubber surface for muddy boots, dogs and the like. Our car had the optional space-saver spare tucked away beneath. With 17” ‘Polar’ alloys and a tyre profile suited to mixed surfaces, including a muddy field, the ride remained

relaxing and comfortable.

The Scout’s modified suspension raises both the ride height and ground clearance over the standard version, with added rugged body cladding. This car would easily handle muddy camp-sites and the occasional farm track with ease.

The cabin is restrained yet well designed. Our car had all the mod-cons including Bluetooth, Aux, USB, climate, cruise and so on with a old-school CD player tucked away in the glove box. Trim, layout and finish is good, especially the Alcantara and leather seats on the tested model. The dashboard is clear and easy to use with lots of info available amongst the trip computer settings.

The steering wheel is good to hold with some controls at your fingertips. I like the little touches for storage and convenience.

The Skoda Octavia Scout is a very good car indeed.

Out on the road it provides a very nice, if not especially involving drive. Our model had the optional ‘LaneAssist’ which nudges the steering wheel if you change lanes without indicating because the car thinks you’re wandering. It’s a good feature that most people will appreciate and is just part of the comprehensive safety package.

This is the model to buy if you need a slightly higher ride and the ‘rough road package’ that adds that adds underbody protection, improved approach and rear-departure angles and model-specific front and rear bumpers. If that floats your boat or indeed tows your boat, then I highly recommend the Skoda Octavia Scout as the perfect all-rounder.

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Style

Romance is in “Time to Bloom” shoes (£250) The Urbanista Melbourne Bluetooth speaker (£79) and The Acorn polished copper light (£55)

The Boom Boom ‘Take Care’ Split Dress (£85)

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By Ocelot fashion writer Gina Akers Romance exists all year round and is ever more prevalent this time of year, but has is taken on a new wave?

The tacky flowers, plastic novelty gifts, slushy cards and good ol’ cuddly toy are distant hazy memories that don’t exactly evoke a romantic feeling, even the Milk Tray guy has had a revamp!

Today’s romance rests on themes, styles and experiences rather than garish gifts. Roses have always been considered the flowers of love but when thinking rose think fashion.

The ‘Time to Bloom’ shoes (£250 from www.shoesbyshaherazad.com) reflect rose inspired fashion and are ideal for going from desk to dance floor! The little black dress aka ‘the LBD’ is classic for date night wear, for styles with a current twist check out www.boomboomthelabel.com The Boom Boom ‘Take Care’ Split Dress (£85) works for all occasions, team up with Rose Gold Hammered Heart Earrings (£20) and Bracelet

(£20) from HihoSilver, visit www. hihosilver.co.uk Essential accessories are a must for the right look. Charnos Hosiery have updated fishnet tights with sparkle, visit www.charnoshosiery. co.uk For something with a lacy edge Jonathan Aston Sweet Roses Ankle Socks can bring romance to any outfit, from www.jonathanaston. co.uk For make-up, Jane Iredale’s mineral make-up range has the tones to put you in your best light, including soft pinks, mauves and peaches. The Spring Collection’s Eyeshadow Trios (£28 each) and Peaches and Cream Bronzer (£29.95) are available from www. janeiredale.co.uk.

Fragrance is a must for the air of romance, the Bloom Perfume Continental Roses sample pack gives you a range of fragrant floral choices to suit your mood, £12 from www. bloomperfume.co.uk If you are feeling anti-romance then fashion has embraced that too, Ellie Ellie has a range of anti-valentines clothing including the ‘Fries

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Style

the air Blanc linen storage boxes (£16.50) Rose soy candle by Cosy Glow (£7.50) Rose Gold Hammered Before Guys’ Women’s Sweatshirt Jumper, £29 from www.ellieellie. co.uk Rose gold has taken hold as a huge trend in the home, the warm tone is exactly what is needed to give a room a romantic feel.

The VITA Acorn Polished Copper Light (£55 at www.vitacopenhagen. com) gives the perfect ambient setting, while you can take a comfy seat and relax with the Extended Curve Lounger in Rose Gold from Pouf Daddy (£145) which can also be used outdoors (just think of those dreamy summer nights in the garden), visit www.poufdaddy.co.uk For the finishing touches go for some home accessories, La Petite Maison Blanc Linen Storage Boxes are just the thing to clear away clutter and can be personalised too, from £16.50 at www.lapetitemaisonblanc.co.uk Floral fragrance can be added to your home with the Rose Soy Candle by Cozy Glow, £7.50, from www.Amazon.co.uk/handmade The romantic mood would not be complete without music, whether

Heart Earrings (£20) And pictured below, Jonathan Aston Sweet Roses Ankle Socks.

you are listening to Shaggy (Mr Romantic himself), some Moments in Love, or a more current romantic melody the Urbanista Melbourne Bluetooth Speaker is ideal, £79 at www.urbanista.com Your choice of romantic drink may be a cool but classic wine or perhaps you are going all out for the sexy cocktails, either way OXO Good Grips have lots of fun kitchen tools and barware that look great in the home including the Vertical Lever Corkscrew (£45), and the Press and Pour Cocktail Shaker (£35), visit www.oxouk.com For a really cool but romantic drink Edgerton Pink Gin is not only seriously on trend but contains 15 unique botanicals including Damiana, an ingredient infamous for it’s aphrodisiac qualities, £24.25 from www.31dover. com

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Tech

Smartphones, and why they are making us dumber...

By Mike Barham C’mon people, admit it. We are all glued to our smartphones! You might even be reading this via the digital version of the magazine on yours!

(If you aren’t, head to www.theocelot.co.uk and get your megabyting chops around our new website).

I’m as guilty as the next person when it comes to spending too much time on the transportable telephonic device, with most of my musical bookings and general news gathering coming through one app or another.

But I see people on a daily basis who are even more invested in their phones than I ever thought possible.

I’m talking about those people who take pictures of their food to post on Instagram rather than eating it, then get into a competition of “Who can distort their dogs face the most?” on SnapChat, before sending a few GIFs via Messenger to their mother, who’s still using Facebook like an ‘old person’.

No, I don’t mean just teenagers, this isn’t that kind of rant. Plus, I’m 26 this month, so I’m part of the generation that had to endure MySpace and Bebo before being rewarded with something as slick and functional as Facebook! So I stand in NoMan’s-Land on this issue.

Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that these small pieces of tech have slowly taken over our lives.

Remember the Nokia 3310?

If you’re under 18, this was the godfather of all mobile phones. If it had been human, it would swear at your mum and drop its trousers at policemen because it thought it was harder than a steroid fuelled Russian weightlifter.

And to be honest, this thing was pretty much indestructible, and believe me I tested mine to the brink. I even convinced a friend to ride his bike over it a few times during what I dubbed the “Nokia block off” tests.

The point is, if you drop a modern phone, it’s a tragedy, and will not only cost you a huge amount to replace, but if you don’t know what a Cloud server is, could lead to all those pictures of your spaghetti carbonara never making it to the hallowed pastures of InstaBook!

When the phones were simple and just called people, they were a tool. Now they are a necessity. Some people use them as bank cards for Gods sake, and store some of their most intimate information on their handy little device. Whole lives can be absorbed into memory chips. And all of it removes physical ties to the real world.

No I’m not being dramatic.

I’ve seen couples spend an entire evening looking up every now and again from their iPhones only to acknowledge their other half hasn’t fallen through the floor of Pizza Express into another dimension. I’m not even exaggerating, I mean they were literally on their phones throughout their romantic meal together. Both of them! If it wasn’t in their hands it was on the table next to them.

We’re so dependant and focused on being ‘connected’ that we don’t see the ironic truth; we are growing further apart. Think about it. How do you find out that your friends are having a party? Or that your parents have just bought a new car? THROUGH YOUR PHONE! And those most affected by this affliction may never even read these inspirational words of warning.

Unless they head to our website...

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Screenzone: TV

24 Hours in Eh? and Eeeh!

Eric Carter does not take too kindly to being described as the new Jack Bauer.

Screen Grab A TV column by Jamie Hill Wasn’t that first season of 24 a cracking bit of telly?

Here we had former Lost Boy Kiefer Sutherland running onto our screens in the most ridiculous heart in mouth action series that had ever been televised.

And it really was nail-biting stuff.

The whole concept was new. The real-time aspect of each episode (kind of) being an hour.

With the clock constantly ticking down it felt immediate and as if anything could happen.

It was pretty mad stuff and the first couple of seasons were just great escapist television (and not a right wing fantasy as some have desribed it) as far from reality as Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom.

But that was before Kiefer suddenly turned into ‘Dour Bauer’ as the trauma of everything that the writers were putting this character through started to feel a bit much.

By the London-set 24: Live Another Day, Jack Bauer was a walking advert for PTSD with

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only the annoying Chloe, who had inexplicably turned into a bargain basement Lisbeth Salander from The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo, for company.

The formula needed a reboot.

It needed something fresh. And, although Jack Bauer has given his all, it was about time that he called it a day (rather than living another bloody day) and retired. In fact I bet he’s literally been counting down the hours until he could finally go to the home of retired action heroes and have a break. (I’ve got this picture in my head now of Sly, Arnie, Bruce, Chuck, Jean-Claude, Jackie and Dolph welcoming Kiefer into their weekly shuffleboard team.)

So for the makers of 24 it’s a brand new day.

And for this brand new day they’ve got a brand new face.

And his name is Eric Carter.

A name that sounds nearly as hard as Jack Bauer.

This is for the new series called 24: Legacy with Carter played

by Walking Dead alumni Corey Hawkins.

It all sounds like familiar 24 territory.

Here’s the synopsis After leading a mission to eliminate terrorist leader Sheik Ibrahim Bin-Khalid, Eric Carter, returns to the U.S. and finds out that he and his squad mates are targeted for assassination in retaliation for Bin-Khalid’s death. With nowhere else to turn, Carter asks CTU to help him save his life while also stopping one of the largest-scale terror attacks on American soil.

The events will take place three years after the events in 24: Live Another Day and is set in Washington, D.C. It’s due to premiere stateside after the Superbowl on Sunday February 5. A timing that seems pretty apt as you can already hear gung-ho Americans shouting ‘Hell, yeah!’ in a patriotic fervour just at the mention of 24.

It will be coming to the UK via Fox on Valentine’s Day. Which is nice as nothing speaks romance more than gunshot wounds, terrorism and explosions. I can’t wait.

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G c ‘O u

w

Ben Hônisett

Graphic artist, Original artwork, limited edition prints, illustrations, greeting cards and private commissions taken. Now also exhibiting with ‘The Newbury Art Collective’ and through the ‘Open Studios’ scheme. Works also available for order online. For further information about up and coming events, opening times of the ‘Open Studios’ scheme or to enquire about a piece of work, please visit the various links below and follow on facebook.

NEWBURY

ART info@benhonisett.com COLLECTIVE www.benhonisett.com • www.open-studios.org.uk www.facebook.com/benhonisettart • www.facebook.com/newburyartcollective Ocelot 128.indd 21

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Screenzone: Gaming A Knight, a Viking and a Samurai walk into a bar...

It’s just a flesh wound!

Game On! The gaming column by Mike Barham You know those arguments you have in the pub?

No, this isn’t about to get political, I mean the six to eight pint debates blokes have about who would win in a fight...

Like would a Roman Centurion be able to beat a Musketeer in a fist fight? Do you think the Mongol Horde could smack around a unit from the SAS? Could a caveman take on that massive bloke from Game of Thrones?

It seems Ubisoft have been spending a lot of time debating these critical issues and have decided to settle their argument by creating a new hack-and-slash title that pits some of history’s greatest warriors against one another on the virtual battlefield.

Players can control a fighter from three different factions, namely The Legion (Knights), The Chosen (Samurai), and The Warborn (Vikings) to see which legendary warrior comes out on top.

So let’s just get this straight. It’s old-school, melee combat pitching player against player as some of the most brutal fighters from history.

How do you pull that off? Knifing someone in your usual FPS titles is just a push of a button, so how do you make a whole game out of it?

Well the developers have come up with something called “Art of Battle”, which is initiated when the player encounters stronger enemies who have more health.

Players enter a duelling mode with their foe and choose how they attack, so you can stare down your counterpart

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and tackle him man to man, the old-fashioned way.

I’d have to say, I’m excited.

We’ve had nothing but traditional FPS tomfoolery for the past few years and, with the epic Battlefield 1 as the exception, I can say for one that it’s getting a little tiresome.

Sure they are enjoyable enough, but For Honor fills me with hope that we could have something different and brilliant on our hands.

In premise, For Honor reminds me of a little PC title called Chivalry, a mass online brawl between players set on medieval battlefields. Sure it’s a little low-res and simplistic, but the battles are massive in scale and can produce some incredible and hilarious results. Just have a look on YouTube.

My only concern is this; Ubisoft have a history at this point for creating great sounding titles in principle, delivering a decent first example but drop the ball in delivering on all the promise. The first Assassins Creed was epic in story, but repetitive in mechanics. The Division had similar problems, with a brilliant concept and gripping narrative, but has not aged well at all.

Many of the studio’s titles have taken hold on the second or third iteration, but I hope this will be rectified with For Honor, as the scope for settling pub based arguments is wide and as yet untapped.

I would love to see the crossover potential realised, and we can finally see if Mario and Sonic can really hack it against a castle full of Vikings.

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Screenzone: Film They’ve been waiting 20 years on this platform - Damn Southern Rail!

The second coming...

Are You Talkin’ To Me? A Film column by Jamie Hill By the time you read this magazine I might be sitting in the corner of a darkened room crying my eyes out.

But this will only be if they’ve done a ‘Highlander 2’ on Trainspotting.

You know what I mean?0 When a sequel is so bad that it actually ruins the original film.

Trainspotting is a fantastic film told with real grit and energy and humour. It was a film that came along in the mid-nineties and just sideswiped you into what was one of the most enjoyable bits of celluloid created.

On paper, you would never have believed that a film that tackled such a taboo subject as heroin addiction could not only be so visceral and though-provoking but also so funny and fresh.

I mean, before this time, the only introduction we had had to director Danny Boyle was Shallow Grave and then suddenly he came along and gave us the perfect adaptation of Irvine Welsh’s absolutely

unadaptable book.

And now they’ve got Trainspotting 2. Or T2 as the marketeers would have us believe.

It’s actually out at about the same time as this magazine comes out at the end of January.

I’m not expecting it to match the sheer rawness and exuberence of the original as that would just feel wrong now that they’re all 20 years older but I am expecting it to tell me something new.

With the same actors and creative team on board as the original I know already that this isn’t a sequel just for the sake of it.

It’s no Zoolander 2, which took an original and funny movie, and just stole the plot of another woeful sequel Cars 2 to make it a cut-price Austin Powers-lite movie just to feed Ben Stiller’s ever-expanding ego as he disappears slowly up his own arse uttering the words ‘I was funny... once’ before finally being gone forever.

No. What I actually want from a sequel to Trainspotting is something different. Something that makes me

think as we follow these skagheads into middle age.

I still want Begbie to be angry though.

I won’t watch Trainspotting 2 unless Begbie is still angry.

If it turns out that Begbie is now a 50 year old middle manager with gout who likes watching Countryfile and is a member of the National Trust I will seriously just have to find Danny Boyle and Irvine Welsh and let them know in no uncertain terms that I’m a bit upset.

Apparently it’s loosely based on Welsh’s follow-up novel to Trainspotting, Porno. I’m hoping that it is ‘loosely adapted’. As being a soft Southerner like me I found the Scottish vernacular in the book Trainspotting a tad hard to understand and Porno for me ended up being so indecipherable that reading it was like trying to crack the enigma code.

So please do a good job on this one guys as after Trump and hard Brexit I don’t think I could suffer another major disappointment.

Begbie better be angry though.

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Brews and Eats

Dan’s bit of foodie heaven

If you’re into the Marlborough restaurant scene you’ll recognise Dan Bond.

For years he’s been one of the main driving forces at Coles Restaurant on Kingsbury Street.

And now, after last year’s sad closure of Coles due to the owners’ retirement, the Australian chef, who is never without a smile on his face, is back in his own restaurant and it’s called Dan’s.

Dan’s is one of the few independent restaurants in Marlborough and the chef and his team are all about doing the simple things well. Great food, great service and lots of things to drink.

It has seating for 20 to 30 guests and is a small and cosy place with a great buzz and atmosphere.

The restaurant can be found on London Road in Marlborough where Moran’s used to be.

It opened just before Christmas and it’s been non-stop for them ever since.

Dan said: “It’s been great so far. We’ve made a place that people feel comfortable to pop in for a plate of food as well as a relaxing drink. Everybody is welcome.

“We have a great range of spirits and soft drinks, ice cold Estrella Damm on tap and bottles of local beers.

“Our wine list is diverse, reflecting my Australian roots and of course and most importantly we cook tasty food with care and passion that people really want to eat.”

To book a table visit www.dansrestaurant.co.uk or call 01672 512112.

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Devizes Festival of Winter Ales

Brews and Eats

Devizes Corn Exchange

24th/25th February 2017 24th - 4pm-11pm 25th - 11am-5pm and 5.30pm-11pm

The nights are getting shorter but there is still a chill in the air. You can keep warm by huddling by the radiator or crawling under a duvet. Or you can get your warmth in a lot more exciting way...

Devizes Outdoor Celebratory Art’s (DOCA) Festival of Winter Ales has a winning combination of fine ales and ciders, plus DOCA-style entertainment, and is a fundraising event for Devizes’ most loved festival.

Each year, DOCA brings some of the best performers from across the UK and Europe to the Devizes International Street Festival in August.

Alongside the Christmas Lantern Parade and a programme of participatory arts opportunities, DOCA has planted its roots firmly in the local community.

The Winter Ales festival is DOCA’s main fundraiser, run in association with the local Kennet & Avon Brewery.

Malcolm Shipp of K&A Brewery said “We already have a fantastic list coming together of the finest ales from around the country. With the circus entertainment and live music we have lined up, this

has to be one of the most unique beer festivals in the region” Attendees will be treated to entertainment from the crowd-pleasing Cleverly Brothers, returning by popular demand, and the circus giant (in every sense of the word) Big Grey.

Artistic Director Loz Samuels said: “We are very excited to bring you this great event, with fantastic music, pies, performance and beer, what more could you want? Come and join us, we look forward to giving you a warm welcome.”

The festival offers a great opportunity to find out more about DOCA and they are always looking out for willing volunteers. If anyone is interested in joining this amazing group of Festival Makers, please do get in touch.

Tickets are £8 per session, available online via www.docadevizes.org.uk, or through select local pubs and shops.

All profits will contribute towards DOCA’s annual programme.

For more information, call 07500 786541 or email info@docadevizes.org.uk

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Brews and Eats

Brewery Bird meets the publican In a series of ground-breaking one-on-one interviews, Brewery Bird gets the low-down from some of Ocelotshire’s most hardworking and beer-championing licensees with a no-holds barred, full frontal approach in…..Meet The Publican!

Name: Paul Hexter Pub: Royal Oak Location: Newbury Street, Wantage, OX12 8DF How long have you worked in the trade?

My earliest experience was working behind a rugby club bar in Reading in the late 70’s. I took over the Royal Oak in September 1983; making this my 34th year here.

What made you want to become a publican?

I worked in the computer industry originally, back in the day and decided to leave the rat race early. I’d always had a fondness for beer and so taking on a pub seemed a natural progression.

Describe yourself using three beer style characteristics: Rather fond of the old Russian Stout style – which I medicate my clientele with from time to time. I’m a comfortable, laid back armchair and slippers kind of chap which is how I would describe a good Russian Stout.

Does the British pub have a future?

I think good pubs have a future – like any business, if you aren’t giving the customer what they want, customers

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will go elsewhere. Pubs may need to adapt more so than in the past in order to attract different/new clientele, ensuring their continued validity in the community. But it’s just as important to recognise your regulars, who may no longer be spring chickens but who have loyally propped up the bar, regularly. I raise my glass to them. Regularly.

Excluding this one, if you could run a pub anywhere in the world, where would it be, and why?

It would be by the beach opposite Sydney Harbour – I’ve done a lot of wine tours over the years and very much enjoyed my time on that particular beach.

Which three famous people (from history or alive today) would you most like to share a pint with, and why?

Oliver Reed, Peter O’Toole and Richard Harris – they all enjoyed a pint or three.

Weirdest (printable) thing you’ve ever been asked by a customer?

“Could I provide a witch-ducking machine?” Our last pub was next to a canal in Reading and we had a witchducking machine constructed for charity events.

What words of wisdom would you give to someone thinking of running their own pub?

Don’t! Honestly, take a long, hard look at the life you have now and the life you really want to lead. Pub life is undoubtedly the opposite to what you have in mind. That said, I’d do it all over again!

Is a Jaffa Cake in actual fact, a biscuit?

Never liked them and never cared!

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Brews and Eats

Say ‘ello to Aloo Gobi

For more inspiration visit www.riverford.co.uk/recipes

Aloo Gobi (Serves 2) Aloo gobi – ‘potato cauliflower’ – should not be confined to the takeaway. It’s easy to make yourself and is a good, inexpensive, vegan dinner. You need to use waxy or all-rounder potatoes so that they hold their shape.

2 tbsp vegetable oil 1 onion, thinly sliced 2 garlic cloves, very finely chopped 4–5cm piece of fresh ginger, peeled & grated 1 tsp black mustard seeds ¼ tsp ground turmeric ½ tsp ground cumin ½ tsp ground coriander 1 small green chilli, deseeded if you prefer less heat, chopped 6–8 curry leaves 1 small or medium cauliflower, broken or cut into large bite-sized florets (keep any light-coloured inner green leaves) 1 tomato, diced juice of ¼ lemon, plus a little extra to finish 400g waxy potatoes, peeled & cut into even chunks handful of fresh coriander leaves, roughly

chopped sea salt warm naan bread, to serve mango chutney, to serve Heat the oil in a large heavy-based pan.

Add the onion and fry on a low heat for 10 minutes, stirring now and then to stop it catching.

Add the garlic, ginger, mustards seeds, turmeric, cumin, coriander, chilli and curry leaves. Turn the heat up a little and fry, stirring, until you hear the mustard seeds pop.

Add the cauliflower florets and leaves, the tomato and lemon juice and a splash of water.

Cover and cook on a very low heat until the cauliflower is tender.

Add a splash more water if the veg starts to catch on the bottom of the pan.

Meanwhile, cook the potatoes in boiling water for 8–10 minutes, until just tender. Drain and set aside.

When the cauliflower is almost tender, add the potatoes and stir to warm them through.

Remove the pan from the heat, stir in the fresh coriander, season with salt and add more lemon juice to taste. Serve with warm naan bread and mango chutney.

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Brews and Eats

The history of Cake

This is a chocolate mousse cake we just casually knocked up in our spare time

By Mike Barham We are well aware you are all on a “new year, new you” drive at the moment. And we are also completely aware that you’ve probably decided it’s a stupid idea, the gym is full of sweaty egotists and you’d much prefer your weekends to be spent relaxing on the sofa rather than ‘pushing your body to find the limit’.

So we’ve decided this month, you deserve a cake.

Just don’t try to eat the one above. As tasty as it looks, we are sorry to report that it is still just paper printed in Merthyr Tydfil.

Cake, as we all know, is a glorious baked indulgence, which in its oldest form were modifications of breads, but cakes now cover a wide range of preparations that can be simple or elaborate, and share features with other desserts such as pastries, meringues, custards, and pies.

The term ‘cake’ has a long history, and word itself is of Viking origin, from the Old Norse word ‘kaka’ Which is clearly different from the modern interpretation of the word, which means ‘lanky Brazilian footballer’.

Ancient Greeks called cakes ‘plakous’, derived from the word ‘flat’ and were baked using flour mixed with eggs, milk, nuts and honey, and also had a cake called ‘satura’, which was a flat, heavy affair. During the Roman period, the name for cake became ‘placenta’ and were baked on a pastry base or inside a case.

Again, in modern times, this has a very different

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meaning. Although frying and eating a placenta is still acceptable in some areas...we are told.

My personal favourite wheel of sweet delight, the humble cheesecake, was also invented by the Greeks (along with the majority of civilised society) but a more modern version is found in Forme of Cury, an English cookbook from 1390. On this basis, chef Heston Blumenthal has argued that cheesecake is an English invention, but I would argue he needs those massive, satellite signal receiving spectacles checked thoroughly.

Cakes, far from being the sinful treat we all fear but secretly crave, have also proven to be life-savers throughout history. During the Great Depression in the US, there was a surplus of mollases and a desperate need to provide easily made food to millions of economically depressed people. One company struck upon a great idea, creating simple cakes in a box, thus turning this special one-off foodstuff into a mass produced item of confectionery for all.

In the booming years after the First World War, US companies developed this idea further, marketing cake mix on the principle of convenience, especially to housewives. Although my mum refuses to accept these exist. You could use her rock cakes to assault a WW1 bunker.

So next time you’re presented with your birthday cake, remember; you’re eating a placenta. Enjoy!

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in association with Wychwood Brewery www.wychwood.co.uk

Theatre List

Roll up, roll up and grab your Spring Theatre Guide here!

It’s that month in The Ocelot calendar that makes us feel the most useful, as we provide you with details and timings for every show in every major theatre in Ocelotshire. And what an offering we are being treated to!

There are a veritable gaggle of amazing comedians, some simply incredible musical performances, theatrical marvels for adults and the kids, and those all important school holidays to plan around. Not to mention the elegant dance performances, cabaret acts and even a puppet called Fred!

For all events where we’ve stated that “Times Vary”, head to our handy venue section below to find out where you can get hold of exact times and prices. We simply couldn’t fit it all in otherwise!

THEATRES AND VENUES

Arlington Arts Centre, Mary Hare, Snelsmore Common, Newbury RG14 3BQ www.arlingtonarts.co.uk Arts at The Old Fire Station, 40 George Street, Oxford OX1 2AQ www.oldfirestation.org.uk

The Bohemian Balcony, Jennings Street, Swindon SN2 2BD www.bohemianbalcony.com City Hall Salisbury, Malthouse Lane, Salisbury SP2 7TU www.cityhallsalisbury.co.uk Cornerstone Arts Centre, 25 Station Road, Didcot OX11 7NE www.cornerstone-arts.org.uk Corn Exchange, Market Place, Newbury RG14 5BD www.cornexchangenew.com Glee Club at The Bullingdon, 162 Cowley Road, Oxford OX4 1UE www.glee.co.uk/oxford Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Borough Parade, Chippenham SN15 3WL www.neeld.co.uk New Greenham Arts, Greenham Business Park, 113 Lindenmuth Way, Newbury RG19 6HN www.cornexchangenew.com/newgreenhamarts

New Theatre, George Street, Oxford OX1 2AG www.atgtickets.com/new-theatre-oxford North Wall Arts Centre, South Parade, Oxford OX2 7JN www.thenorthwall.com Oxford Playhouse, 11-12 Beaumont Street, Oxford OX1 2LW www.oxfordplayhouse.com Pegasus Theatre, Magdalen Road, Oxford OX4 1RE www.pegasustheatre.org.uk The Players Theatre, The Players Theatre, 3 Nelson Street, Thame OX9 2DP www.thameplayers.co.uk Salisbury Arts Centre, Bedwin Street, Salisbury SP1 3UT www.salisburyartscentre.co.uk Salisbury Playhouse, Malthouse Lane, Salisbury SP2 7RA www.salisburyplayhouse.com Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Road, Swindon SN1 4BJ www.swindontheatres.co.uk Trowbridge Town Hall, Market Street, Trowbridge BA14 8EQ www.trowbridgetownhall.com The Watermill, Bagnor, Newbury, RG20 8AE www.watermill.org.uk Wyvern Theatre, Theatre Square, Swindon SN1 1QN www.swindontheatres.co.uk Of course, if you can’t find what you’re after head over to

www.TheOcelot.co.uk

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Theatre list

in association with Wychwood Brewery www.wychwood.co.uk

Tiff Stevenson will be performing her new show Seven at Swindon Arts Centre on February 3

Wednesday February 1 to Thursday February 9 Wednesday February 1 to Saturday February 18 EXHIBITIONS: Ken Russell’s Teddy Girls and Boys Times Vary - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Wednesday February 1 to Saturday February 25 THEATRE: Murder for Two Times Vary - Watermill Theatre, Newbury Wednesday February 1 THEATRE: National Storytelling Week: Narrathon Times Vary - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury FILMS: Swindon Film Society - Our Little Sister 7:45pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire Thursday February 2 to Saturday February 4 THEATRE: Meet Fred 7.45pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire Thursday February 2 COMEDY: Nish Kumar 6.45pm - Glee Club at The Bullingdon, Oxford THEATRE: Chekhov’s Shorts 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire CONCERT: Putting the Band Back Together 7.30pm - South Street Arts Centre, Reading

COMEDY: Lee Hurst - Comedy Show No. 9 8pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot COMEDY: Paul Foot: ‘Tis A Pity She’s A Piglet 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford CONCERT: Simon Mayor and The Mandolinquents 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury THEATRE: Tiff Stevenson - Seven 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Rd THEATRE: Vamos Theatre: The Best Thing 8pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire Saturday February 4 COMEDY: Michael Fabbri + Phil Nichol + Stephen Grant 7pm - Glee Club at The Bullingdon, Oxford FAMILY EVENTS: Puppets Go Wild: The Treetop Restaurant 2pm - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford THEATRE: Burton 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire CONCERT: Old Herbaceous 7.45pm - The Players Theatre, Thame CONCERT: The Bob Dylan Story 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

THEATRE: Eurohouse 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford

THEATRE: Jason and the Argonauts 8pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

COMEDY: Josie Long: Something Better 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

TALKS: Mitch Benn: Don’t Fear The Reaper New Greenham Arts, Newbury

Friday February 3 COMEDY: Jongleurs Comedy Club February 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

CONCERT: Volosi (Polish Klezmer Band) 8pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire

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Saturday February 4 to Sunday February 5 DANCE: Wootton Bassett School of Dance - Can’t Stop The Feeling Times Vary - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Sunday February 5 FAMILY EVENTS: Wow! Said the Owl Times Vary - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot COMEDY: Gary Delaney - There’s Something About Gary 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire Monday February 6 CONCERT: Jamie Raven Live 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Tuesday February 7 TALKS: Christine Wallace Bakes...

Macarons 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot COMEDY: Carl Donnelly - Bad Man Tings 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire Wednesday February 8 DANCE: Wiltshire Schools Dance Festival 4.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon FILMS: Swindon Film Society - The Crow’s Egg 7.45pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire Wednesday February 8 to Saturday February 11 THEATRE: Suddenly Last Summer 7.30pm - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford Thursday February 9 THEATRE: Butterfly 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford COMEDY: Danny Baker - Cradle To The Stage 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

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The kids will love The Very Hungry Caterpillar at Newbury Corn Exchange from February 15

Thursday February 9 to Wednesday February 15 TALKS: Dan Cruikshank - A History of Architecture in 100 Buildings 7.30pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Spillikin - A Love Story 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

DANCE: 3Fall Dance Company 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury

COMEDY: Henning Wehn - Westphalia Is Not An Option 8pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

COMEDY: Lucy Porter - Consequences 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire Friday February 10 THEATRE: 600 People 5pm - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford CONCERT: Swindon Recital Series Michael Whight and Paul Turner 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire CONCERT: Beyond The Barricade 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury CONCERT: The Ian English Boodlam Band 7.45pm - The Players Theatre, Thame COMEDY: Ross Noble - Brain Dump 8pm - New Theatre, Oxford CONCERT: The Bongolian 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury FAMILY EVENTS: The Dark Room Age Guide: 10+ 8pm - New Greenham Arts, Newbury COMEDY: The Noise Next Door: Uproar!

8pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot CONCERT: Wille and the Bandits 8pm - City Hall Salisbury, Salisbury Friday February 10 to Saturday February 11

Saturday February 11 FAMILY EVENTS: WOW! Said The Owl Times Vary - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford FAMILY EVENTS: Big Howard’s LOL-tastic Yuckfest for Kids and Well-Trained Adults 11am - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford THEATRE: Meet Fred 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot CONCERT: Solid Gold 70s Show 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury CONCERT: Beverley Craven 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire CABARET: Hundred Watt Club 8pm - City Hall Salisbury, Salisbury Sunday February 12 THEATRE: Monstersaurus Times Vary - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire COMEDY: A Fringe Favourites Double Bill - Steve Bugeja + Adam Hess 7.45pm - The Players Theatre, Thame Monday February 13 FAMILY EVENTS: Three Little Pigs 1pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

CONCERT: Jackson - Live in Concert 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Tues February 14 to Sat February 18 THEATRE: Pink Mist Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford Tuesday February 14 FAMILY EVENTS: Mr Bloom’s Nursery - Live!

1.15pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon THEATRE: A Pocketful of Grimms 2.30pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury TALKS: ‘Wildlife of the Scilly Isles’ by Andrew Cleave 7.30pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire COMEDY: Hammer and Tongue 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford THEATRE: Oxford Revue Valentine’s Special 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford Wednesday February 15 FAMILY EVENTS: The Great Jaydini 11am - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon CONCERT: Lunchtime Recital - Paul Turner 1pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon COMEDY: Jonathan Pie: Live 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon CONCERT: Someone Like You - The Adele Songbook 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford

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Artistic communities from across the spectrum gather at The Bohemian Balcony in Swindon to showcase new work on February 16

Wednesday February 15 to Monday February 20 Weds February 15 to Thurs February 16 FAMILY EVENTS: The Very Hungry Caterpillar Times Vary - Corn Exchange, Newbury Weds February 15 to Sat February 18 CONCERT: Ten In A Bar - In Their Element 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire Thursday February 16 FAMILY EVENTS: Kid Carpet’s Super Mega Rockin’ Rock Show 3pm - Trowbrige Town Hall, Wiltshire COMEDY: Mark Thomas: The Red Shed 7pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford THEATRICAL SCREENING: NT Live: Saint Joan 7pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury TALKS: A Potted History of Trowbridge 7.30pm - Trowbrige Town Hall, Wiltshire

Times Vary - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Blood, Sweat and Tears 6pm - City Hall, Salisbury, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Thor and Loki 6pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

COMEDY: Sol Bernstein + Paul F Taylor + Clint Edwards + Carly Smallman 7pm - Glee Club at The Bullingdon, Oxford

THEATRE: Ellen Kent’s Nabucco 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford FILMS: Swallows and Amazons 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire FILMS: Swallows and Amazons 7.30pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire TALKS: Michael Portillo - Life: A Game of Two Halves 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon THEATRE: The Vanishing Man 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford CONCERT: Whitney: Queen of the Night 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

CABARET: Dare Devil Rides to Jarama 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

Friday February 17 to Saturday February 18 CABARET: Anyday 7pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

CONCERT: Rumours of Fleetwood Mac Hits to Blues World Tour 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

Saturday February 18 THEATRE: All the Journeys I Never Took Times Vary - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Swindon Scratch Night 7.30pm - The Bohemian Balcony, Swindon THEATRE: Ellen Kent’s La Bohème 11pm - New Theatre, Oxford Friday February 17 THEATRE: We Are Ian

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THEATRE: Chinese New Year Extravaganza Times Vary - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon FAMILY EVENTS: Much Ado about Puffin 12pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire

CONCERT: Treorchy Male Choir 7pm - St Andrews, Chippenham, Wiltshire THEATRE: Ellen Kent: Aida 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford THEATRE: Confessions of a Super Snooper 7.45pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire CONCERT: Jim Causley 8pm - New Greenham Arts, Newbury THEATRE: Workshy 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford Sunday February 19 FAMILY EVENTS: The Princess and the Frog 2pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot CONCERT: Smitty’s Big Four 3pm - Watermill Theatre, Newbury THEATRE: Lady Chatterley’s Lover 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Monday February 20 to Sat February 25 THEATRE: Blood Brothers Times Vary - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon THEATRE: Wonderland Times Vary - New Theatre, Oxford

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It’s ALIVE! Frankenstein rises again at Cornerstone Arts Centre in Didcot on February 23

Tuesday February 21 to Saturday February 25 Tuesday February 21 to Sat February 25 THEATRE: Silver Lining Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse

Wed February 22 to Thurs February 23 THEATRE: Infinity Pool 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford

Tuesday February 21 COMEDY: Comedy Scratch Night 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

Thursday February 23 THEATRE: Say That Again 6pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Jekyll The Ripper 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire CONCERT: Oxford Improvisers 7.45pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford DANCE: Wanna Dance with Somebody 8pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire Wednesday February 22 CONCERT: Southampton Youth Concert Sinfonia - We’re Going on a Bear Hunt 6pm - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham

TALKS: Haptic/Tacit: Q&A 6.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford THEATRE: Frankenstein 7pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

Friday February 24 THEATRICAL SCREENINGS: Sing-a-long-a Grease 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury THEATRE: Spillikin - A Love Story 7.45pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire Saturday February 25 DANCE: Lion Dance: Chinese New Year Festival show Times Vary - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford

CONCERT: New College Recital Evening 7.30pm - Phoenix Theatre, New College, Swindon Wiltshire

COMEDY: Dana Alexander + John Lynn + Chris Cairns + Alistair Williams 7pm - Glee Club at The Bullingdon, Oxford

FAMILY EVENTS: Punches Gravity In The Face 7.30pm - Trowbrige Town Hall, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Good Dog 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

THEATRE: Cuncrete 7.45pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

CONCERT: The Epstein + Sean Taylor 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

FILMS: Banff Mountain Film Festival World Tour 7.30pm - City Hall Salisbury, Wiltshire

COMEDY: Croft & Pearce Are Not Themselves 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

CONCERT: A Celebration of Neil Diamond 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

COMEDY: Lee Hurst Comedy Show No. 9 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire

COMEDY: Justin Moorhouse - People and Feelings 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Wail Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Jon Udry Punches Gravity In The Face 7.30pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire

THEATRE: The Vanishing Man New Greenham Arts, Newbury

CONCERT: Nine Below Zero 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury

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Omid Djalili is Shmuck for a Night at City Hall Salisbury on March 4

Saturday February 25 to Saturday March 4 COMEDY: The Noise Next Door - Uproar!

8pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire Sunday February 26 THEATRE: King Arthur by Michael Murpurgo Times Vary - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham FAMILY EVENTS: The Boy and The Mermaid 2pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot FAMILY EVENTS: Big Beat Little Feet: Biscuithead & The Biscuit Badgers 3pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury DANCE: U.Dance Regional Platform 7pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon DANCE: Brendan Cole - All Night Long 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford COMEDY: Mitch Benn - Don’t Fear The Reaper 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire Monday February 27 to Saturday March 4 COMEDY: The Play That Goes Wrong 7.30pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire Tuesday February 28 to Saturday March 4 THEATRE: The Winter’s Tale Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford Tuesday February 28 COMEDY: I’m Sorry I Haven’t A Clue

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7.30pm - City Hall Salisbury, Wiltshire Wednesday March 1 FILMS: Swindon Film Society - Rams 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire CONCERT: The Grahams 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury POETRY: Tom Gill: Growing Pains 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford CONCERT: You Win Again - The Story of the Bee Gees 8pm - New Theatre, Oxford

March 7.30pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury DANCE: Leviathan Pegasus Theatre, Oxford THEATRE: William Shakespeare’s Long Lost First Play (abridged) 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon CONCERT: Blackbeard’s Tea Party 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury TALKS: Dr Phil’s Health Revolution 8pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

FILMS: Southside With You 7.30pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire

CONCERT: The Grahams 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire

THEATRE: FOSAC Young Arts Showcase Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Rd

Friday March 3 to Saturday March 4 THEATRE: Leaf 10.30am - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

TALKS: An Audience with Lesley Garrett 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury COMEDY: Carl Donnelly: Bad Man Tings 8pm - New Greenham Arts, Newbury Thursday March 2 to Saturday March 25 THEATRE: Faust x2 Times Vary - Watermill Theatre, Newbury Friday March 3 FILMS: Artists’ Film and Video 10am - Trowbrige Town Hall, Wiltshire

CONCERT: Camille O’Sullivan 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Friday March 3 to Sunday March 5 THEATRE: Constellations 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire Saturday March 4 THEATRE: Cinderella 5pm - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham

COMEDY: Jongleurs Comedy Club -

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Bridget Christie is back at the Oxford Playhouse on March 10, because you demanded it!

Saturday March 4 to Thursday March 9 CONCERT: Andy Fairweather Low & The Low Riders 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon THEATRE: Burton 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot THEATRE: I Am Beast 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Monday March 6 DANCE: Reflections 7.30pm - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford TALKS: Robert Winston - Modifying Humans 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

CONCERT: Sam Bailey - Sing My Heart Out 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford

Monday March 6 to Wednesday March 8 TALKS: Matthew Bourne’s Early Adventures 2 7.30pm - Oxford Playhouse

COMEDY: Susan Calman: The Calman Before The Storm 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

Monday March 6 to Saturday March 11 THEATRE: The Verdict 7.30pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

COMEDY: Josie Long: Something Better 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

Tuesday March 7 TALKS: An Evening With Levison Wood 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

COMEDY: Omid Djalili: Schmuck For A Night 8pm - Salisbury City Hall, Wiltshire Saturday March 4 to Saturday April 22 EXHBITIONS: Perdita Sinclair 10am - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire

CONCERT: Chris Wood 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford TALKS: Nick Galer Bakes 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

Sunday March 5 FAMILY EVENTS: Leaping Frog 2pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

Tuesday March 7 to Saturday March 11 THEATRE: Evita Times Vary - New Theatre, Oxford

CONCERT: Camille O’Sullivan - The Carny Dream 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

Wednesday March 8 THEATRE: That’ll Be The Day 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

CONCERT: Mike and The Mechanics

THEATRE: Meet Fred 7.30pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

FILMS: Swindon Film Society - The Second Mother 7.45pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire THEATRE: Scary Shit 8pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire Wednesday March 8 to Thursday March 9 THEATRE: The Depraved Appetite of Tarrare the Freak 9pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Thursday March 9 THEATRE: Frozen Light: Home Times Vary - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury CONCERT: Life’s Merry Go Round 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot THEATRE: Meet Fred 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford THEATRE: Noel & Gertie 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire COMEDY: Shappi Khorsandi: ‘Oh My Country!’ From Morris Dancing to Morrissey 7.30pm - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham CONCERT: Blazin’ Fiddles 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury COMEDY: The Misfit Analysis 8pm - New Greenham Arts, Newbury

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The Champions of Magic will be dazzling audiences at the Corn Exchange in Newbury on March 24

Friday March 10 to Thursday March 16 Friday March 10 CONCERT: Richard Digance - Golden Anniversary Tour 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire CABARET: Northern Soul Live 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury COMEDY: Bridget Christie - Because You Demanded It 8pm - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford COMEDY: Charlie Baker is the Hit Polisher 8pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot Friday March 10 to Saturday March 11 DANCE: Moving With The Times Times Vary - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford CONCERT: audiograft 2017 Times Vary - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford COMEDY: The Misfit Analysis 7.45pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire COMEDY: Jon Richardson: Old Man 8pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Saturday March 11 FAMILY EVENTS: The Magic Paintbrush Times Vary - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford THEATRE: Thrive 7pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot COMEDY: Andy Parsons

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7.30pm - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford CONCERT: Salisbury Symphony Orchestra 7.30pm - City Hall Salisbury, Wiltshire

Night Times Vary - Corn Exchange, Newbury DANCE: St Gabriel’s Dance Showcase 7.30pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury

CONCERT: Swindon Recital Series - Dale Piano Trio 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire

Tuesday March 14 to Thursday March 16 THEATRE: Bucket List 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford

Saturday March 11 to Tuesday March 31 EXHIBITIONS: Maryl Donoghue - It’s a Jungle Out There Times Vary - New Greenham Arts, Newbury

Tuesday March 14 to Saturday March 18 THEATRE: Blithe Spirit Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford

Sunday March 12 CONCERT: Stornoway - The Farewell Tour 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Tuesday March 14 TALKS: ‘The Science and Beauty of Birds’

by Oliver Smart 7.30pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire THEATRE: Fish Eye 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford COMEDY: Hammer and Tongue 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford COMEDY: Rob Beckett - Mouth of the South 8pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Tuesday March 14 to Wednesday March 15 THEATRE: Romeo And Juliet / Twelfth

Wednesday March 15 COMEDY: Rory Bremner: Party Political 7.30pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire Wednesday March 15 to Friday March 17 DANCE: Rambert - Ghost Dances plus other works 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Wednesday March 15 to Saturday March 18 THEATRE: The Western Players Amateur Dramatics Presents - Don’t Dress for Dinner 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire Thursday March 16 FILMS: I, Daniel Blake 7.30pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire DANCE: Tangomotion 7.30pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire COMEDY: Jon Richardson : Old Man 8pm - City Hall Salisbury, Wiltshire

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David Starkey will be discussing Henry VIII at Salisbury Arts Centre on March 18

Thursday March 16 to Thursday March 23 CONCERT: Mud Morganfield 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury COMEDY: Sara Pascoe: Animal 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Thursday March 16 to Saturday March 18 COMEDY: Jonny and the Baptists: Eat the Poor 7.45pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

DANCE: Gemma Short School of Dance & Theatre Arts Times Vary - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon FAMILY EVENTS: Jack and the Beans Talk Times Vary - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford TALKS: David Starkey - Henry VIII 7.30pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Showtime Bohème 8pm - New Greenham Arts, Newbury

THEATRE: The Reduced Shakespeare Company 7.30pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

Friday March 17 TALKS: Cheats and Deceits 5pm - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford

Sunday March 19 CONCERT: The Glenn Miller Orchestra 3pm - New Theatre, Oxford

CONCERT: A Swingin Affair 7.30pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Holmes & Watson - The Farewell Tour 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Diary of a Hounslow Girl 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford CONCERT: Allan Yn Y Fan: St. Patrick’s Day Twmpath 8pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire CONCERT: Soprano Summit Legacy Band 8pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot Friday March 17 to Saturday March 18 THEATRE: Every You Every Me Times Vary - BT Studio at Oxford Playhouse, Oxford Friday March 17 to Sunday March 19 FAMILY EVENTS: Babe the Sheep Pig Times Vary - Corn Exchange, Newbury Saturday March 18

Monday March 20 THEATRE: Home 11am - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire COMEDY: Jasper Carrott & Alistair McGowan 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Monday March 20 to Thursday March 23 THEATRE: The Unbuilt Room 7pm - Frewin Annexe, Brasenose College, Oxford Monday March 20 to Saturday March 25 THEATRE: La Strada Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford Tuesday March 21 DANCE: Spring Equinox 7pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

FILMS: Banff Mountain Film Festival 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon TALKS: Cafe Scientifique Spring 17 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot COMEDY: Sara Pascoe - Animal 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire THEATRE: Theatre Scratch Night 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford Wednesday March 22 TALKS: An Evening with Levison Wood 7.30pm - City Hall Salisbury, Wiltshire COMEDY: Andy Parsons - Peak Bulls**t 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury FILMS: Swindon Film Society - Son of Saul 7.45pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire COMEDY: Count Arthur Strong - The Sound of Mucus 8pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Thursday March 23 COMEDY: Is That Chris Ramsey?

7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon COMEDY: Count Arthur Strong - The Sound of Mucus 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford FILMS: The Innocents 7pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Wiltshire THEATRE: Ventoux 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire

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The Royal Philharmonic Orchestra debut at Swindon’s Wyvern Theatre on March 25

Thursday March 23 to Tuesday April 4 COMEDY: Russell Kane: Right Man, Wrong Age 8pm - Salisbury City Hall, Wiltshire

Tuesday March 28 to Saturday April 8 THEATRE: As The Crow Flies 7.45pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

Friday March 24 CONCERT: Elkie Brooks 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

Wednesday March 29 COMEDY: Lee Nelson - Serious Joker 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

THEATRE: Richard III 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Rosalind 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

CABARET: The Dreamboys 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford

Wednesday March 29 to Thursday March 30 THEATRE: All The Little Lights 7.30pm - BT Studio at Oxford Playhouse, Oxford

THEATRE: Under My Skin 7.30pm - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford CABARET: Champions of Magic 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

Wednesday March 29 to Saturday April 1 THEATRE: Ann Veronica Times Vary - Watermill Theatre, Newbury

Saturday March 25 THEATRE: The Giant Jam Sandwich 11am - Salisbury Playhouse, Salisbury

Wednesday March 29 to Saturday April 15 THEATRE: Echo’s End 7.30pm - Salisbury Playhouse, Wiltshire

THEATRE: Earthquakes in London 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

Thursday March 30 COMEDY: Jonny and the Baptists: Eat The Poor 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

CONCERT: Royal Philharmonic Orchestra 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon COMEDY: Kieran Hodgson: Maestro 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Sunday March 26 COMEDY: Jimmy Carr - The Best of, Ultimate, Gold, Greatest Hits tour 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Tuesday March 28 to Saturday April 1 THEATRE: Grease Times Vary - New Theatre, Oxford

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Thursday March 30 to Saturday April 1 THEATRE: Jane Eyre Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford Friday March 31 DANCE: Incognito 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot COMEDY: Jongleurs Comedy Club March II 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury COMEDY: Rachel Parris: Best Laid Plans

8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford THEATRE: The Thing That Came From Over There!

8pm - New Greenham Arts, Newbury Saturday April 1 FAMILY EVENTS: Bright Sparks Times Vary - BT Studio at Oxford Playhouse, Oxford FAMILY EVENTS: A Dragon’s Tale 11am - Watermill Theatre, Newbury COMEDY: Bilal Zafar - Cakes 8pm - New Greenham Arts, Newbury Saturday April 1 to Sunday April 2 DANCE: Dance Sensation: Pop, Classic Times Vary - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury Sunday April 2 FAMILY EVENTS: Monday’s Child 2pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot Monday April 3 to Friday April 7 FESTIVAL: Marmalade 2017 Times Vary - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford Monday April 3 to Saturday April 8 THEATRE: Abigail’s Party Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford Tuesday April 4 TALKS: Christine Wallace Bakes... Lemon Meringue Roulade 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot THEATRE: Letters To Myself 7.30pm - BT Studio at Oxford Playhouse, Oxford

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Oliver in the Overworld comes to the Neeld in Chippenham on April 15

Tuesday April 4 to Sunday April 23 Thursday April 6 THEATRE: Flat 73 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot Thursday April 6 to Saturday May 6 THEATRE: Twelfth Night Times Vary - Watermill Theatre, Newbury Friday April 7 to Sunday April 9 THEATRE: Alchymy: Plays from the Lab Times Vary - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Saturday April 8 FAMILY EVENTS: Puppets Go Wild: Macamu Times Vary - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford CONCERT: Caro Emerald 7pm - New Theatre, Oxford Sunday April 9 FAMILY EVENTS: Morgan & West Magic Show For Kids and Childish Grown-ups 2pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot CABARET: Morgan and West - Parlour Tricks 7pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot Monday April 10 FAMILY EVENTS: Mr Fox’s Fables 9.30am - The Top Room at Oxford Playhouse, Oxford FAMILY EVENTS: The Boy and The Mermaid 2pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury

Tuesday April 11 THEATRICAL SCREENING: ROH Live Jewels 7.15pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

Centre, Chippenham

COMEDY: Hammer and Tongue 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

Tuesday April 18 to Saturday April 22 THEATRE: Pygmalion Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford

Tuesday April 11 to Saturday April 15 FAMILY EVENTS: Fantastic Mr. Fox Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford Wednesday April 12 FAMILY EVENTS: Jurassic Adventures Times Vary - Corn Exchange, Newbury THEATRE: As the Crow Flies Trowbrige Town Hall, Wiltshire Wednesday April 12 to Sunday April 23 FAMILY EVENTS: How To Hide a Lion Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford Thursday April 13 COMEDY: Tweedy’s Lost Property Times Vary - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot FAMILY EVENTS: The Party 1.30pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury Thursday April 13 to Saturday April 15 THEATRE: Tamburlaine 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford Saturday April 15 THEATRE: Oliver in the Overworld Times Vary - Neeld Community and Arts

Tuesday April 18 FAMILY EVENTS: Amazing Bubble Man Times Vary - Corn Exchange, Newbury

Thursday April 20 THEATRE: Offside 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Thursday April 20 to Saturday April 22 THEATRE: Made in Dagenham Times Vary - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot Friday April 21 TALKS: Analyse Thou 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford Friday April 21 to Saturday April 22 FAMILY EVENTS: The First Hippo on the Moon Times Vary - New Theatre, Oxford Saturday April 22 FAMILY EVENTS: Braniac Live!

Times Vary - Corn Exchange, Newbury Sunday April 23 to Monday April 24 FAMILY EVENTS: The First Hippo on the Moon Times Vary - Corn Exchange, Newbury Tuesday April 25

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Theatre list

in association with Wychwood Brewery www.wychwood.co.uk

Remembering Fred dances through the New Theatre in Oxford on May 29

Tuesday April 25 to Saturday May 29 DANCE: Dance Scratch Night 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford THEATRE: Human Story Theatre Scenes from....

7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford CONCERT: Yamato Drummers 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Wednesday April 26 THEATRICAL SCREENING: RSC Live Julius Caesar 7pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury DANCE: Ian Waite and Natalie Lowe Somewhere In Time 7.30pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury Thursday April 27 COMEDY: O No! 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford POETRY: Luke Wright: The Toll 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Friday April 28 COMEDY: Jongleurs - On The Road 8pm - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham Friday April 28 to Saturday April 29 DANCE: My First Ballet - Cinderella Times Vary - New Theatre, Oxford

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Saturday April 29 TALKS: How We Think We Think Times Vary - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford CABARET: A Bit of Magic with Stu and Friends 8pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury Sunday April 30 FAMILY EVENTS: The Explorer Times Vary - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford FAMILY EVENTS: Big Beat Little Feet: Kid Carpet’s Super Mega Rockin’ Rock Show 3pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury Wednesday May 3 THEATRE: Give Me Your Love 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Monday May 10 to Tuesday May 11 THEATRE: The Lounge 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Wednesday May 10 to Saturday May 13 THEATRE: Romeo + Juliet Times Vary - Watermill Theatre, Newbury Thursday May 11 COMEDY: Richard Herring: The Best 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford Friday May 12 CABARET: The Time Travelling Magicians 7pm - Trowbrige Town Hall, Wiltshire

CONCERT: The Unravelling Wilburys 7.30pm - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham Monday May 15 to Saturday May 20 THEATRE: Sister Act Times Vary - New Theatre, Oxford Tuesday May 16 to Saturday May 20 THEATRE: I Capture The Castle Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford Thursday May 18 THEATRE: Bubble Schmeisis 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Friday May 19 COMEDY: Jongleurs - On The Road 8pm - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham Saturday May 20 COMEDY: Susan Calman: The Calman Before the Storm 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Monday May 22 to Saturday May 27 THEATRE: The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time Times Vary - New Theatre, Oxford Thursday May 25 to Saturday July 1 THEATRE: House and Garden Times Vary - Watermill Theatre, Newbury Saturday May 29 DANCE: Remembering Fred 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford

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Unlimited Power!

The Emperor is coming to Newbury’s Watermill Theatre with a devilish new adaptation

This March, British screen and stage legend Ian McDiarmid, well known for his role as Emperor Palpatine in the Star Wars film series, will perform at The Watermill Theatre in the world premiere of his new adaptation of Goethe’s Faust.

An Olivier and Tony award-winning actor, McDiarmid is one of Britain’s most successful performers and has played iconic roles for the RSC, National Theatre, Donmar Warehouse and Almeida Theatre where he was Artistic Director with Jonathan Kent from 1990 – 2001.

Ian McDiarmid said: “Faust x2 is a fast-moving version of the famous legend, told with humour and a sense of danger. At its heart, it is a play about intimacy and so ideally suited to the intimate space of The Watermill.”

Faust x2 is directed by one of the country’s most exciting young directors; Lisa Blair. She recently directed Contractions at Sheffield Theatres and was associate director on Jude Law’s Henry V and The Merchant of Venice for the RSC and Almeida Theatre.

A powerful story of lust, sacrifice and regret, Faust x2 is a thrilling, atmospheric and moving reinvention of a timeless dramatic tale. McDiarmid will portray a disillusioned academic whose never-ending quest for

knowledge results in making a deal with the devilish Mephisto. Featuring music, projection and a hauntingly poetic script, the production will open for a limited four week run on Thursday 2 March until Saturday 25 March.

Faust x2 is part of The Watermill Theatre’s celebratory 50th Anniversary Season, which as you can tell from our Theatre Guide on page 29, is full of exciting and innovative new productions. And some old favourites too!

For more information and tickets visit watermill.org.uk or call the box office on 01635 46044.

(We’re sure Faust x2 will be an electrifying performance...)

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Unlimited Power!

Journey of imagination

Young visitors to Oxford’s Story Museum are being challenged to help steer the story craft

Visitors to Oxford’s Story Museum are being challenged to take part in an imaginative interactive story installation - Ever After.

The Story Museum’s Story Craft will be manned by an all-star crew of authors, illustrators and storytellers including Katherine Rundell, Katy Ridell, and Joseph Coelho.

As it makes its way through various story worlds, visitors will be able to track the craft from ‘Mission Control’, a new and exciting interactive installation (designed by Tom Piper, MBE) where children and families can write, draw, film and record their suggestions for the stories that should become part of the museum’s collection.

And fans of the museum unable to visit needn’t worry – progress of the craft’s voyage will also be shared online.

A series of blogs posted by the various crew members

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throughout the journey will update online readers on the successes and challenges faced, all accompanied by beautiful illustrations from up-and-coming illustrator Katy Riddell.

Online readers will be encouraged to celebrate in the crew’s successes, help overcome the perils faced during the voyage, and offer suggestions as to where the ship should journey to next!

Whether manning Mission Control in Oxford, or plotting the course and monitoring the crew’s progress online, The Story Museum needs your help to make The Story Craft’s mission a success. The adventure begins!

The exhibition opens 10 February and runs throughout 2017.

Oxford’s Story Museum is a registered charity with a vision to enrich lives, particularly young lives, through story.

They do this by providing great ways of engaging with great stories and through work in schools and the community.

The Museum opened to the public in 2014 after a first stage of capital works and is currently raising funds for ‘Chapter 2’ to continue the development of its site and to bring the whole building into use.

During 2017, alongside a regular programme of immersive and interactive exhibitions and events, The Story Museum is asking audiences to suggest which stories and story-related objects should become part of the finished Museum’s collection.

The Ever After event is supported by Arts Council England through the Grants for the Arts Programme.

The Story Museum is supported by the National Lottery through the Heritage Lottery Fund and by Arts Council England.

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Dancin’ Oxford Oxford’s Annual Spring Dance Festival 3 - 12 March 2017

Oxford gets its

Dancin’ Oxford’s annual Spring Festival offers something for everyone.

From the crème de la crème of international choreographers, to free outdoor experiences, a Dance-A-Thon, professional and amateur companies plus shows for children and workshops, Dancin’ Oxford 2017 has programmed a festival of treats.

Now in its 11th year and funded by Oxford City Council and Arts Council, England, Dancin’ Oxford goes from strength to strength.

Claire Thompson, Oxford City Council Dance Officer said “Each new festival is rewarding in so many ways. Oxford’s vibrant dance scene love it as do many people who have never experienced dance before.

The free dance event in the city brings a variety of dance

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styles to the shoppers and has some real treats in store!

Dancin’ Spaces (4 March), in and around the city centre, is a variety of programmed dance performances and promenade pieces. Shoppers might find they are chosen to be ‘protected’ by Dancing Bodyguards or discover a dance about football fusing hip hop with contemporary dance, watch and interact with a performance for children or see a duet in the Weston Library foyer. All this runs alongside a plethora of local dance companies which will entertain and delight shoppers.

The famed international choreographer Matthew Bourne (Swan Lake, The Car Man) brings a selection of his witty and entertaining work that established his career, with Early Adventures (6 - 8 March).

Moving with the Times (10 & 11 March) is the annual sell-out cornucopia of dance at Pegasus.

This year the three companies selected, Justice in Motion, Unlock The Chains Collective and Richard Chappell offer a mixture of dance styles to contemporary music, Finnish Tango and performance poetry.

Other professional companies appearing include James Wilton performing a new work Leviathan (3 March), which also offers young people a three-day workshop resulting in a curtain raiser before the performance and Oxford’s Body Politic which celebrates its first full length show Reflections (6 March).

Families are not left out with The Party (25 February) Baby Boogie (4 Mar), The Magic Paintbrush (11 March) and Dance Workshop (12 March).

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Dancin’ Oxford Oxford’s Annual Spring Dance Festival 3 - 12 March 2017

groove a th-on At a glance

25 February at 1pm NEARLY THERE YET - The Party - 3 years+ and families The Mill Arts Centre, Banbury Friday 3 March at 7.30pm JAMES WILTON - Leviathan 12 years+ Pegasus 27 February 12 noon – 4pm DANCIN’ SPACES - Festival Launch - free dance performances Oxford City Centre, Museum of History of Science, Weston Library 6 - 8 March at 7.30pm MATTHEW BOURNE - Early Adventures Oxford Playhouse 6 March at 7.30pm BODY POLITIC - Reflections Pegasus

Dancin’ Oxford: 3 - 12 March Ticketed events: £3 - £26; Oxford Playhouse www.ticketsoxford.com 01865 305305, Pegasus Theatre www.pegasustheatre.org.uk 01865 812 150,

The North Wall www.thenorthwall.com 01865 319450, The Mill www.themillartscentre.co.uk 01295 290 002 www.dancinoxford.co.uk

11 March at 11am & 2pm SPRINGS DANCE COMPANY The Magic Paintbrush The North Wall 10&11 February at 7.30pm & 2.30pm MOVING WITH THE TIMES Professional dance showcase Pegasus

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Comedy Double Whammy: Mitch Benn

Laughing at life...

Mitch Benn is an English musician, comedian and author known for his comedy rock songs performed on BBC radio. He is a regular contributor to BBC Radio 4’s satirical programme The Now Show, and has hosted other radio shows.

What is your brand new 2017 tour about?

Death and mortality. It’s the one thing that unites us and yet the one thing we don’t want to talk about. So I thought I’d crack a bunch of jokes and sing some songs about.

What was the inspiration behind the name, ‘Don’t Fear the Reaper’?

Aside from the obvious (if you’re an old rock bore like me) Blue Oyster Cult reference it was the fact that the slew of famous people dying last year got me thinking about my own mortality and mortality in general.

Was music all around when you were growing up in Liverpool, do you come from a musical family or were your influences external?

Very musical if not professionally so, with a couple of exceptions.

Don’t think I’m related to anybody who can’t play something. And I grew up in Liverpool in the 70s, wading through the debris of the Mersey Sound and Beatlemania.

go as it never really occurred to me not to.

Tell me a little bit about your books Terra and Terra’s World.

What are they about, what prompted you to write them, will we see any more?

They’re about a human child who is abducted by a well-meaning alien and grows up on another planet. They’re mainly inspired by my relationship with my kids, and there WILL be a part three but I don’t know when.

When did you first think ‘Comedy - that’s the job for me’ After I’d already been doing it for about a year. In my generation you don’t find many comics who always wanted to do this when we grew up; most of us seem to have gotten side tracked into it while trying to do other things. Younger comics will have grown up in an era when comedy was seen as rather sexier so maybe more of them will have wanted to be comedians when they were kids.

Which comedian first piqued your interest, and why?

My comic ‘awakening’ definitely came during the aftermath of the alternative ‘explosion’ at the end of the 70s and its subsequent takeover of TV comedy (The Young Ones etc.) but weirdly the first stand up I remember admiring was Billy Connolly, who belonged to a slightly earlier generation. In fact I’ve always thought that artistically I’ve got more in common with his generation, the early 70s ex-folk club raconteurs, than with any subsequent comedy ‘movement’.

If you weren’t working in comedy what would you be doing?

If you mean day job, not a damn clue. I’ve written books though; if I could make a living doing that I’d be happy.

Tell us about your worst gig so far Did a Christmas gig in Romford once. Once.... ...and the one which still send shivers for all the right reasons?

Maybe the first time I ever played the big comedy stage at Glastonbury in 1995. l See Mitch at Swindon Arts Centre on February 26. www.swindontheatres.co.uk

When was the moment you realised you could combine music with comedy?

I first did stand up at the age of 21 in Montréal, Canada and incorporated music and songwriting right from the get

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Comedy Double Whammy: Carl Donnelly

Middle age angst Carl Donnelly is an English standup comedian and writer who is bringing his tour Bad Man Ting to Swindon as part of a nationwide tour.

Where are you driving to? What car have you got?

Well – I’m on my way to Carlisle at the moment and I’m driving some sort of Peugeot thing…

Yes, it’s a glamorous life being a comedian let me tell you.

How did your first ever gig go?

Brilliantly actually. I was 24 and I managed to get a small slot so I told a couple of jokes and it went down really well. The second gig went just as well and I started to think that I was the bee’s knees.

Obviously then, the third gig was a disaster, it was a real lesson.

Have you got any favourite put downs – are you heckler friendly?

I’m not really that kind of comedian. I am aware that some stand-ups court that, almost as part of their act. But the way I see it, people have paid money to come and see you, I usually play little arts centres and those sort of venues and

people know what sort of thing to expect. It would be just weird if they then started heckling me.

Are all comedians depressed clowns?

Nope, not at all. There is this popular image of comedians mining that material to make a show out of it.

But I’ve found that it is possible to also write good comedy without it having to come from a dark place. I think, because of the nature of this job that if you are that way inclined it may bring that side of you out. You do have a lot of time to sit and think about yourself – if you are naturally depressive, then sitting for a couple of hours in a coffee shop in Carlisle could well bring that out of you.

When you tell people that you are a comedian, do they take you seriously (apologies to Bob Monkhouse)?

It’s becoming more acceptable nowadays. Most people understand what you’re talking about when you tell them that you are a professional stand-up. You’re less likely to have people saying ‘go on then, make me laugh’ You do

occasionally get people who get a bit strange with you.

I was in the back of a taxi the other day and the driver asked me how much I could earn for a gig. When I told him, he got really angry with me. He stopped the cab and told me to get out.

He seemed to think it was too much for just getting up on stage and telling some jokes. It was a shame, he was probably having a bad day.

What does the new tour (Bad Man Tings) focus on?

Well it was born out of a tour that I did in Edinburgh – I sort of wrote and changed a lot of the material while I was on stage – I talk a lot about my thoughts on reaching the ripe old age of 34.

Statistically it’s supposed to be the happiest age of your life and it seems to be going well for me so far – I’ve done shows about divorce, depression and taking hallucinogenic drugs (which is not to be recommended by the way) but now I’m living with someone new and I’m actually happy in my own skin. I’ve really embraced middle age, I’ve taken up gardening, and I’ve developed a real fascination with air plants.

What’s next in the world of Carl Donnelly?

I’m looking forward to taking my tour to Australia, I’m going to go to a comedy festival in Melbourne and I’m writing a new show. I tend not to look any further forward than six months, but the next six months are looking pretty good for me. l See Carl at Swindon Arts Centre February 7. www.swindontheatres.co.uk

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Swindon Fringe

Fringe benefits

Louise Reay (main picture), Hodgepodge (top right) and Sweet Nightingale (bottom right)

The Swindon Fringe Festival is back this year from 1 - 9 of April, playing across four wonderful venues in Swindon.

Opening night will be on 31 March at The Bohemian Balcony in Rodbourne (a new space that has been transformed from an old cinema into a performance venue) and everyone is invited to have a glass of champagne and nibbles, enjoy some music and be entertained by a stand up comedian while they offer prizes, raffles and display their Swinge Week.

Then there will also be children’s shows; Alf the Highwayman, The Homeless Panda and The Missing Easter Egg all at £5 per person so the whole family can come along.

This year they have free performances at The Ocelot

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sponsored state at The Victoria.

On Sunday 2 April, The Groovy Pig Music Festival will run from mid-afternoon until late in the evening starring some local favourites such as Sweet Nightingale, Terra 45, Spunking Octochoke and Flame&Co as well as some great visiting bands bringing jazz from Ella – Celebrating 100 years and a bit of folk with Plucking Different.

The Victoria will also feature stand up comedians on Monday 3 April and Tuesday 4 with last year’s favourite Matt Hoss coming back alongside James Luckraft-Law, Paul Lawless and Swindonian Tony Cowards.

During the week, you’ll be running between the Shoebox Theatre and Swindon Town Hall where the fringe will be putting on new plays; Breaking Point,

The Door, The Justice Equation and old plays; A Visit From Miss Prothero by Alan Bennett and Pugilist Specialist by Adriano Shaplin. There will be physical theatre with Antigone and Blooming Out. We’ve also got comedy magicians; Laughs With Tricks and Man Of 1000 Farces.

There are also comedy poets; Kevin, King Of Egypt. There will also be hilarious improv; April Fools by Fools Gladly and Gatecrash Tasty Comedy Improv Feast. And they’ve even got clown and spoons workshops for family and friends at £5 each.

And that’s still not all. More information can be found at www. swindonfringefestival.com.

Tickets available at The Wyvern Theatre Box Office www.swindontheatres.co.uk.

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February Gigs 4th Metson 11th Locomotions 18th Bandantree 25th Port Erin

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Gig Monkey Gig Monkey knows that in reality he’s an ape but he doesn’t care because he’s rock n’ roll like that and who needs these labels anyway. Don’t put him in a box man!

Gig Monkey, AKA Ed Dyer, once again sifts through the best music released by local artists. If you like the sound of something please do go and check it out Send your reviews to ed@theocelot.co.uk

As The Sun Sleeps – As Good As Gold (EP)

Pop-Punk is a strange genre, it’s not particularly punk for a start, and despite the melodies, you don’t tend to find it troubling the charts either.

However, inaccurate genre moniker aside, it is a genre that still shifts records, gig tickets and merch and refuses to go away.

The Americans perfected the formula with bands like New Found Glory but Swindonians ATSS prove anything the yanks can do, Brits can too. This may be a pretty straight copy of the US style, but you cannot escape the fact it is done really well. The production is slick, the melodies slicker and the songs fun, engaging and tongue in cheek (check out the excellent promo vids on the band’s YouTube channel as well). As with the music, lyrical generic conventions are firmly followed with a theme of nostalgic reflection running through the band’s songs, despite them not being too far past their teens themselves, and track 2 Florida exhibiting a commendable pride in their much maligned hometown.

Much as with Pop-Punk behemoths Blink 182, much of the excitement comes from some crazy and never predictable drumming, in contrast to the more conventional work elsewhere – drummer TShrimp is the closest I have seen to a human embodiment of Animal the Muppet live and is most entertaining.

So, no wheel re-invention at work here, but the band are the first to acknowledge this, and are happy and proud to fly the same flag as the bands they love. There is nothing wrong with this either, I love them for the single minded devotion, and they do pull it off well. If you are a Pop-Punk fan, this lot are definitely the next band you will love. If not, they won’t be.

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The Dustbowl Children – Hollow Lands (EP)

Giving this EP a spin for the first time, you would never ever guess where The Dustbowl Children originate from.

Despite the swampy blues and rocky folk sounds on offer, this is a band who were incepted in the slumbering streets of Malmesbury. Not only do they have a sound far removed from their origin, they seem to have virtuosic skills that surprise too.

Blending together southern rock, folk, blues and country traditions into an unusual but compelling sound both familiar and new at the same time: the slide blues rock is fairly recognisable, but with vocal and lyrical styles suddenly taking a folky turn in places you are kept on your toes wondering if a mandolin and a hey-nonnynonny are about to break out. Fortunately just as this seems likely the band twist back to stomping riffage and all is well with the world.

With some super-slick slide guitar work alongside the powerful riffs and beats, this is a balanced and well worked recording that bodes very well for the future

The Reaper – Close My Eyes (Single)

Despite still only being 17, Witney band The Reaper have been rocking the scene for years. This single heralds the release of EP Building These Walls and is, as you would expect from this band, a hefty slab of powerful melodic metal.

This is a mature, considered and solid piece of work, as you would expect from a band of this experience, but as always totally at odds with their age. It has plenty of interesting twists and turns and the band manage to carve out their own sound - no mean feat in such a formula driven style of music. It leaves you excited for the rest of the EP, and wondering, how good are they going to be in five years time?

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O2 Academy

March to the O2 Academy!

Another packed month of musical marvels is coming up in March at the O2 Academy in Oxford, on top of the amazing line up of shows in February. (Just check the Gig Listings or the back page for more on those!)

First up is very much a home-grown Ocelotshire show with bands from Swindon, Reading and Oxfordshire all teaming up to take over the Academy2 on March 4.

Banbury’s Evarose lead the charge as part of their nationwide tour with Veridian from Reading. The four-piece, all girl pop rock group from Banbury are thoroughly deserving of their rising popularity. Their debut album Invisible Monsters was released during summer last year after a successful crowd funding campaign, and it’s an absolute blinder of a record, receiving plaudits from across the rock world.

Their touring companions Veridian are by no-means playing Evarose, Veridian and A Way With Words perform on second fiddle however, and the six Reading lads will be March 4 bombarding the Academy2 with their starry eyed brand of shimmering rock. Having only been around since the start of 2016, Veridian have had coverage with BBC, Upset, Scuzz and Kerrang Radio, so this tour is just another step towards success.

A Way With Words will open in their charming yet aggressive groove and we are sure sparks will fly. Get down early!

To calm things down in the middle of the month, Laura Marling will bring her stunning live show to the O2 Academy on March 13, after releasing her new album Semper Femina three days before coming to Oxford, via her own label More Alarming Records. Alongside the announcement of the new album is news that Laura’s directorial debut will be the video for the first fruits of the record and the album’s opening track, Soothing.

So not only is she a great musical mastermind, she’s also Laura Marling comes to Oxford on March 13 directing her own videos. Multitasking magic at its best. It’s needless to say that this will be something special.

If you want to get particularly crazy towards the end of the month, how about a burst of Sonic Boom Six on March 24?

If you’ve not heard of the Manchester-based group before now, you can count us supremely surprised. We reckon you should go to more festivals, SB6’s natural habitat thanks to their unique brand of punk, ska, grime, dubstep and metal all mashed up into one confusing yet incredible sonic experience. This is a group that needs to be listened to over and over again just to be understood, but you’ll enjoy every second of the journey. Support on the night comes from the rising stars that are known as Ghouls, who are rapidly gaining attention thanks to their tagline “Acting Adult Since Never”. Charming, crazy and completely unmissable.

For tickets and more information on all the shows at the O2 in the upcoming months, visit: Sonic Boom Six confuse the O2 Academy2 on March 24 www.academymusicgroup.com/o2academyoxford

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The Ocelot Presents...

Discovering the music of today’s and tomorrow’s local scene with our very own man mountain Mike Barham It’s amazing what you find in your cupboard under the stairs... (Credit - Ian Wallman)

Catgod There’s a new deity in Oxford, and it’s given me ‘paws’ for thought!

Catgod have re-emerged on the gigging circuit under their new title, as they were formerly known as Roberto Y Amigos, with their album launch at the Oxford Deaf and Hard of Hearing centre going down a storm.

The self styled “musical collective combining soul and trip-hop sounds with femalemale vocal harmonies” are making all the right noises too, having spread their sphere of feline influence to Radio 6 Music twice in their formative months, as well as garnering the praise of local press including our very own Gig Monkey Ed Dyer, who claimed their debut record could be “the earliest shout for Record of the Year”.

Now if that’s not praise

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from our sonic simian expert then I don’t know what is. And to be honest, Mr Dyer isn’t half wrong with this one (not that he usually is of course) as Catgod are a sublime mix of stylistic variances and nuances that flow in a river of musical intrigue like an Egyptian Pharaoh negotiating the Nile.

For me, Catgod sum up everything that music could and to an extent should be. Experimentation, fluid exploration, a feeling of immersion in the music itself, not just simply following a routine or sound to its stereotypical conclusion. If it sounds good to them, they let it come out, and that’s fantastic. And unfortunately far too rare these days.

You can pick up Catgod - Home In Your Heart via the group at one of their increasingly frequent shows around Oxford, or by heading to; soundcloud.com/catgodmusic

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Feb 3 - Behave and be quiet Feb 4 - hip route and head back holler Feb 9 - The Marvels Feb 10 - TBA Feb 11 - six foot7 Feb 16 - Steve Pledger and Sharon Lazybird Feb 17 - TBA Feb 18 - the hat club Feb 24 - TBA Feb 25 - peeping toms March 11 - Gaz Brookfield March 18 - Professor Elemental

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Live Music News

Salisbury gets a new radio station Salisbury’s scene is really rolling up its sleeves in 2017, and to help the local musical and artistic folk with a little more publicity a new radio station is being set up within the city’s Old Fire Station.

Sarum Radio co-founder Gary Richards told us: “Run by volunteers, we will be covering the local music and entertainment scene, local events and including as many local community groups as we can. Our aim is to give the people of Salisbury a radio station that is truly local.

“As we develop we will include talk shows, local interest shows and feature many of our local and not so local musicians, performers, poets, artists etc.

“Our presenters have a wide and eclectic taste in music ranging from Indie, Northern Soul, Punk, Folk, Electronica, Jazz, Dance, 70’s and many other genres.

“There are many specialist shows in the schedule and these will be complemented by local content as we grow.

“Have a listen, check us out and if you want your music played drop us a message via our Facebook and email”. studio@sarumradio.com

Left to right: Sarum Radio co-founders Ant Bird and Gary Richards with Trustee Trevor Kay (Credit - Spencer Mulholland)

PMT Oxford is moving! Down the road...

Professional Music Technology, the long standing bastion of musical equipment on Cowley Road, are shutting up shop and moving their operation down the road to the site of the former M-Local supermarket at 381 Cowley Road in February.

Apparently, the new store will now be of a similar size to the other PMT stores around the country, something like five times the proportion of the previous store, so no more tripping over those Telecasters and drum stools!

There is no confirmation of the rumour that due to moving into an ex-supermarket, the PMT team will be adding fruit and veg to their stock. They will however still be selling Orange amplifiers... We couldn’t resist!

All Roads Lead to Frome 2017 first wave of acts announced Last year, the first ever All Roads Lead to Frome brought together acts such as Beans on Toast, Oxygen Thief, Brightr, Tuskens and more in a one day dream show at The Cheese and Grain, hosted

by Hit or Miss Promotions and Sheer Music.

This year the promotional pairing have gotten even more ambitious with Gaz Brookfield performing with his full band, Freeze The Atlantic, B-Sydes and Port Erin announced as the first wave of an already impressive line-up, set to take over Frome on May 6.

And we hear on the rumour mill they haven’t even announced the big guns yet!

Keep an eye on the Sheer Music and Hit or Miss social media channels to learn more, or buy your tickets now from: cheeseandgrain.ticketsolve.com

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Live Music News

Gappy Tooth Industries provide a retrospective soundtrack

Reading and Leeds nominated for Best Festival

If you have a history of putting on great shows like the chaps at Gappy Tooth Industries do, why not celebrate it?

That’s exactly the point behind a new mixcloud playlist being uploaded every month by the GTI team, featuring the best music from the multitude of acts that have performed for the long-serving (or suffering) promotional powerhouse.

Head to www.mixcloud.com/gappytoothindustries And if you want to join that impressive list of acts to play for the GTI guys, or just want to get involved with Oxford’s famous music scene, head over to www.gappytooth.com and get in touch.

The team over at Reading & Leeds festival are probably bounding around their office after being nominated for the Best Festival prize at this year’s NME awards.

The festival has become synonymous with the summertime party atmosphere, and the 2016 event saw Biffy Clyro and Foals both nominated for Best Festival Headliner in the same awards. So it must have been a pretty good show.

To celebrate, the Reading and Leeds team have announced their Ambassador Scheme for 2017 as a way of festival fans earning themselves a free ticket to this year’s event, simply by getting their friends to come along too! To sign up visit: www.readingfestival.com

Bradley Cowtan continues Catfish saga with new EP One of Wiltshire most promising musical upstarts, Bradley Cowtan, is continuing his affinity for sea creatures with a new EP Catfish: Part 2 to be released on February 18.

The 21 year old singer/songwriter from near Royal Wootton Bassett is even releasing the new collection of songs via BBC Wiltshire, so keep your radio tuned in!

Bradley said: “It’s called ‘Catfish: Part 2’ as a follow up to Part 1 that was released in September. (There won’t be any more parts to Catfish, this is the last one!).

The video for the debut single from Part 1 hit over 10,000 views on Facebook too, which was completely unexpected!.”

Head to bradleycowtan.com for more fishyness!

Billy Bragg and more confirmed for Wychwood Festival 2017 Wychwood Festival has announced punk singer-songwriter Billy Bragg will be playing the main stage on Friday night.

The festival which takes place from 2 to 4 June also adds the likes of our old friend Beans on Toast, CC Smugglers, Big Boy Bloater, Trudy and the Romance, Laurel and Harpers Ferry with many more acts and performances to be announced for one of the UK’s best loved family festivals.

One of the most inspiring protest singers to come out of the late 70s - Billy Bragg is armed with big hits such as “California Stars” and “When The Roses Bloom Again”.

His music is massively centred on delivering change and inspiring the younger generation to get involved in activism. Day tickets are now on sale from only £47 for an adult ticket, proving once again that Wychwood delivers unbeatable value for money. For tickets and further information please visit wychwoodfestival.com.

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Gig list Wednesday February 1 Martha Wainwright 8pm - Salisbury City Hall, Wiltshire

Triple JD 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

Thursday February 2 Putting the Band Back Together 7.30pm - South Street Arts Centre, Reading

Volosi (Polish Klezmer Band) 8pm - Salisbury Arts Centre, Salisbury

SoP present: Gaz Brookfield (full band) + Raze*Rebuild + Nick Parker 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Last Call 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough Shepherd’s Pie 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Oxfordshire

Unsigned - Inside and Out 7pm - Trowbrige Town Hall, Wiltshire Uprising – BBC Introducing: Loud Mountains + Low Island + Luke May + Tilly Valentine + Stolby 7pm - O2 Academy 2 Oxford Sheer Music presents - Gaz Brookfield + Mike Barham + B-Sydes 8pm - The Cellar Bar, Devizes

Friday February 3 Hell Death Fury 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

Fluid featuring Holy Goof 11pm - O2 Academy 2 Oxford

The All-Nighters 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

Simple feat. Midland 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

John Walsh Trio 8pm - The Cellar Bar, Devizes

The Bongolian 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury

Sunday February 5 Big Band Brunch 12pm - Salisbury Arts Centre

The Hamsters From Hell 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Simon Mayor and The Mandolinquents 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury Sparky’s Spontaneous Showcase and Spotlight Jam 8pm - James Street Tavern, Oxford Oxfordshire Whyte Lytes + support 8pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Newbury Unplugged (Open Mic) 7.30pm - ACE Space, Newbury Willie and The Bandits + Blackballed 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon Dutty Moonshine Big Band & Friends 9pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Megson + Johns & Nowak 8pm - The Village Pump, Trowbridge Behave and Be Quiet 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury Saturday February 4 Art Theefe 7.30pm - Oxford Deaf and Hard of Hearing Centre, Oxford

Bloodstock: Metal to the Masses 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Moody Will and the Roll 8.30pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Monday February 6 Menace Beach + Van Zeller + Wolfs 7.30pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Devizes Folk Club - All Welcome Night 8pm - The Lamb Inn, Devizes The Mastersons + Anthony D’Amato 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Tuesday February 7 Loyle Carner 7pm - O2 Academy, Oxford Singaround 8pm - Cellar Bar, Swan Hotel, Bradford on Avon Wednesday February 8 Agnes Milewski & Eddie McLachlan 6pm - Gibsons Bar, Swindon

Metson 8pm - The Locomotive, Swindon

Thursday February 9 Little Comets 7pm - O2 Academy, Oxford

Shotgun Six 7.30pm - Fusion Arts, Oxford

The Brew + Hell’s Gazelles 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Old Herbaceous 7.45pm - The Players Theatre, Thame

Agnes Milewski & Eddie McLachlan 8pm - The Beehive, Swindon

Hip Route + Head Back Holler 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury

AJ Tracey 11pm - O2 Academy2, Oxford

The Bob Dylan Story 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

The Marvels 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury

Livewire: The AC/DC Show 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury

Friday February 10 Kanadia + Temper Cartel + The Pink Diamond Review 6.30pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Pablos Presents Back 2 Back 8pm - O2 Academy, Oxford

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Wille and the Bandits 8pm - City Hall Salisbury The Standard 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Straight Outta Cowley 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Saturday February 11 Cash (Tribute to the Man in Black) + Hannah Clapham 6.30pm - O2 Academy2 Oxford Fred Abbot + Anton Barbeau + Su Jordan 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Six Foot 7 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury REWS 7.30pm - Fusion Arts, Oxford The Locomotions 8pm - The Locomotive, Swindon Solid Gold 70s Show 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury John Rolls and Danny Foster 8pm - The London Road Inn, Calne Matuki - Valentine’s Gig 8pm - Salisbury Arts Centre Tuesday February 14 Singaround 8pm - Cellar Bar, Swan Hotel, Bradford on Avon Wednesday February 15 Rocking For Carers 7.30pm - Level 3, Swindon Someone Like You - The Adele Songbook 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Wednesday February 15 to Saturday February 18 Ten In A Bar - In Their Element 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Wiltshire

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in association with Wychwood Brewery www.wychwood.co.uk

Gig List

Breabach are coming to The North Wall in Oxford Scottish award winning folk artists Breabach will be bringing their UK tour to The North Wall in Oxford on February 14, providing an ideal Valentine’s Day treat for the trad folk lover in your life!

Walking away with the accolades ‘Folk Band of the Year’ and ‘Album of Year’ at the 2016 Scots Trad Music Awards rounded off an exciting year for Scottish contemporary-folk group Breabach.

2017 sees them back out on tour showcasing an increasingly mature sound and live performance whilst simultaneously building their international recognition on the world and roots music scene as one of the UK’s most dynamic and exciting bands.

March 2016 saw Breabach present their fifth studio album Astar and in February the band will mark a year since the release of the album with a special show at Celtic Connections in Glasgow follow by a string of UK dates showcasing music from the album and some old favourites.

Since launching their career as winners of the Danny Kyle Open Stage at Celtic Connections in 2005 the band have steadily moved from strength to strength, picking up awards and performing at esteemed events along the way. Tickets are available via www.thenorthwall.com Thursday February 16 Martyrials + Ghost of The Avalanche + GagReflex + Sickones 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon Take The Stage - Heat #4 7pm - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham The Deadbeat Apostles + Country For Old Men + Dan McKean Band 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Rumours of Fleetwood Mac 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Sheer Music Present: Thought-Forms + Hound On The Mountain 7.30pm - Level 3, Swindon Swindon Scratch Night 7.30pm - The Bohemian Balcony, Swindon Union J 7.30pm - O2 Academy2, Oxford Steve Pledger and Sharon Lazybird 8pm - The Winchester Gate Friday February 17 Nearly Noel Gallagher’s High Flyin’ Birdz 7.30pm - O2 Academy2, Oxford Indie Night: Smooth Ends + Beach For Tiger + Big Happy Forever 7.30pm - Level 3, Swindon Mr B the Gentleman Rhymer 7.30pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Whitney: Queen of the Night 7.30pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury All You Need is The Beatles 8pm - The Cellar Bar, Devizes The Doors Alive 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon

9pm - The London Road Inn, Calne U2 Baby 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Bass Escape - Launch Party 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Damn Good Reason 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Oxfordshire

Sunday February 19 Smitty’s Big Four 3pm - Watermill Theatre, Newbury

Organised Fun feat. Dan Shake 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Bloodstock: Metal to the Masses 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Open Mic Night 8pm - The Village Pump, Trowbridge

With Ghosts + Young Kings + Edenfalls + Over To You 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Saturday February 18 Treorchy Male Choir 7pm - St Andrews, Chippenham Bandantree 8pm - The Locomotive, Swindon Holly Redford Jones 7.30pm - Fusion Arts, Oxford Phillip Henry & Hannah Martin 8pm - ACE Space, Newbury Shepherd’s Pie + My Own Ghost + Live Rounds 7.30pm - Level 3, Swindon Green Haze 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon Jim Causley 8pm - New Greenham Arts, Thatcham Mike Barham

Monday February 20 Rumours of Fleetwood Mac 7.30pm - City Hall, Salisbury Cherrington Ward 8pm - The Lamb Inn, Devizes Tuesday February 21 Alcuna Wilds + We Are Strangers Minds 7.30pm - Level 3, Swindon Oxford Improvisers 7.45pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford Singaround 8pm - Cellar Bar, Swan Hotel, Bradford on Avon Wednesday February 22 Southampton Youth Concert Sinfonia 6pm - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham

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Gig list

in association with Wychwood Brewery www.wychwood.co.uk

Nat Martin and Ruzz Guitar amaze at the R&B Bar in Devizes A brave crowd battled the freezing cold evening to blues style reminiscent of Robben Ford with very creative gather at the R&B Bar @ The Sports Club in Devizes for lead guitar melodies showing his incredible ability but this month’s live music event by Disorderly Sounds. never out of place and always serving the song rather Ruzz Guitar’s Blues Review, still fresh from their than self indulgence. second album Another amazing launch in the closing performance which months of 2016, fully captivated offered a masterful the audience who performance with a literally mobbed (in true 1950s Rock&Roll the nicest way) the feel. The three piece band after the gig band fronted by Ruzz to compliment them Evans brought their and get their CDs very best game and signed. got the crowd on their Visuals from feet on more than Devizes Lights one occasion with foot & Sound and a stomping and dancing desk manned by during a brilliant fun the Disorderly and uptempo set.

Sounds crew were Nat Martin mid-solo at the R&B Bar in Devizes (Credit - Frank Romain) The Nat Martin Band, impeccable. provided an excellent performance and it’s clear that So, all in all, another brilliant event by Disorderly all four members possess incredible technical skills and Sounds at the R&B Bar in Devizes. Next is Pete Gage a sense of melody second to none. Nat Martin, also well Band supported by the Poplar Jake Electric Delta Review known for his role in the band backing Jo Harman both on March 25. live and in studio, is a true guitar virtuoso with a funk/ Visit facebook.com/Disorderly-Sounds for more info.

All Ears Avow + Ten Tombs + A Way With Words + Indigo Hze 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon Thursday February 23 Pete Boss + Tom Ivey Band 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford New College Recital Evening 7.30pm - Phoenix Theatre, New College, Swindon Bowie for Aleppo 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon Big Boy Bloater + The Limits 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Friday February 24 Karl Blau 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford SWHC Relaunch show: Roads to Nowhere + At The Helm + Erase The Rat 7.30pm - Level 3, Swindon Back Water Roll 8pm - The Cellar Bar, Devizes Chariots + Tilly Valentine + Wednesday’s Wolves 8pm - The Jericho Tavern, Oxford Desert Mountain Tribe

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8pm - The Victoria, Swindon Ghost of the Avalanche 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Police Dog Hogan 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury The Mighty Disco Biscuits 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Saturday February 25 Last Rites + Echo4four + Raised By Hypocrites 6pm - O2 Academy2, Oxford Port Erin 8pm - The Locomotive, Swindon White Lies 6.30pm - O2 Academy, Oxford Gappy Tooth Industries present: Grub + Downard + Old Ernie 8.30pm - The Wheatsheaf, Oxford Volume #2 feat. Sub Zero & Evil B 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Broadside Ballads 7.30pm - Hollywell Music Room, Oxford

Police Dog Hogan 7.30pm - City Hall, Salisbury The Epstein + Sean Taylor 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford A Celebration of Neil Diamond 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury Nine Below Zero 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury Rorkes Drift 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon Freefall 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Dusky Live 11pm - O2 Academy, Oxford Sunday February 26 The Lewis Craven Band 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Monday February 27 Devizes Folk Club - All Welcome Night 8pm - The Lamb Inn, Devizes Tuesday February 28 Jon Asprey 8pm - Swan Hotel, Bradford on Avon

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Live Music News Why Stop at the Moon?

Desert Mountain Tribe head to Swindon

Sleeping on the job? Desert Moutain Tribe come to The Victoria in Swindon on February 24

Desert Mountain Tribe will be appearing at The Victoria in Swindon on February 24 for a warm-up gig ahead of their much anticipated North American tour.

The cosmopolitan trio sees Jonty Balls from South London on guitar and vocals, backed up by German brothers Felix and Philipp Jahn, on drums and bass respectively. Drawing comparisons with Wolf Alice, Kasabian and Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, the band’s unique sound has been described by Classic Rock as ‘darkly woozy, garage rock’n’roll’ when they made ‘Runway’ their Track Of The Week in the run-up to Christmas 2015.

Debut album Either That Or The Moon was released in the spring of 2016 to a wealth of positive notices; respected platform Drowned In Sound commented “Desert Mountain Tribe have crafted one of 2016’s finest debuts in Either That Or The Moon. In fact, why stop at the moon? The galaxy is theirs for the taking and on this evidence, only a fool would bet against them succeeding.”

Contactmusic.com’s Dom Gourlay also rated it as one of the Top 10 Albums of 2016. He said: “Their long awaited debut dropped in March and didn’t disappoint, drawing comparisons with The Doors and even Chris Isaak along the way.”

Currently, the band have been picking up support from within BBC 6 Music, regularly featuring on the

recommended playlists of Steve Lamacq, Lauren Laverne and Chris Hawkins.

Also on the bill is Lara Smiles who has so far received extensive airplay on XFM and BBC Radio 6 music’s BBC Introducing after performing at some of Europe and America’s largest live venues and music festivals - and with a recent fourth Glastonbury performance under her belt Lara’s now excited to be planning a UK tour for late 2017 with her band.

Opening the night will be Brighton psychedelic pop rock outfit Fukushima Dolphin, armed with striking melodies, powerful harmonies, a sea of guitars and synthesised leads. The Dolphins have established an awesome live reputation in their native town; Swindon will be their first step towards building a national audience.

Pighill Promotions’ Duncan Robinson said: “My plans for 2017 are to continue to build a pipeline of new, original, breakthrough acts to play in Swindon’s music venues.

DMT is the first of these to be confirmed; more will follow but we need to create momentum and demonstrate to booking agents and managers that there is a thriving market for this sort of act in Swindon.”

Tickets are available online from pighillpromotions. com/tickets, or from The Victoria, Swindon Central Library or Holmes Music. Tickets are £6 in advance or £7 on the door; doors open at 8pm.

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Agony Girl Nine year old Annabel is really getting into Harry Potter. But she’s still had time to answer your questions.

We ask her the questions and these are her answers.... honest!

Dear Annabel, I hear you really love books. If you had to write a book what would it be about?

JK Rowling, Edinburgh Cats. They would go through the cat flap into a magical world where they would have to go on a journey and complete a mission. The cats would be called Ginny and Jessie.

Dear Annabel, I’ve broken down on the M5 just past Weston. Any chance you could come and pick us up?

Dave, Devizes No because I’m nine.

Dear Annabel, If you could stay up all night, what adventures would you go on?

Cressida, Kidlington I would go on an adventure to the zoo and let all the lions and tigers out. And any other cats. And the polar bears.

Dear Annabel, Help. Someone’s accidentally given me the nuclear launch codes and now a minor celebrity has upset me on Twitter.

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Do I nuke their house or not?

Donald, Washington No. He’ll get arrested and he’ll probably kill about 10,000 people including himself.

Dear Annabel, If you could do magic. What tricks would you do?

Hermione, Hogsmeade I would turn into Hermione Grainger and then I would magic 10,000 cats. Actually make that 20 million cats.

Then I would make myself a Hermione wand and then I would get my hair like Hermione and then I would get her clothes and then I would meet my friends Harry and Ron and then I would beat Lucius up.

Dear Annabel, Help. We’ve accidentally elected an idiot as president of the United States and now it’s all going wrong. What should we do?

The American people You should go against him. You should go against that stupid Donald Trump as he deserves to be flushed down the toilet and should get weed and pooed on.

Write into Annabel at editorial@theocelot.co.uk

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