Ocelot 137 november 2017 edition

No: 137 November 2017

Wiltshire, Oxfordshire and West Berkshire

Free

Have a little faith

We talk to Paloma Faith p36

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/ STYLE / EATS / BREWS / SCREEN / TECH 23/10/2017 18:27

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#137 For Starters

NOVEMBER ISSUE

04 Michael Bosley + Luke Coleman 06 Encyclopaedia Oceloticca 08 Running for my life 10 The Bassett Rivers Echo Lifestyle

12 Get Away - Newbury Racecourse 14 Get A Life - Dogs!

16 Style 18 Tech 19 TV 20 Game 21 Film 22 Focus on Chippenham Brews and Eats

25 Wine not?

26 Brewery Bird 27 Magdalen Arms 28 Recipe 30 The Tea Taste Challenge 31 The History of Tea Arts and Culture

32 The Theatre List 34 Jokerface Music

35 The Night of the Ocelot 36 Paloma Faith 38 Buswell 39 Gig Monkey 40 Ritual Union 41 The Twang 42 Gig List The Final Bit of the magazine

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Faith and then some...

As you’ve probably guessed we’ve managed to bag an interview with Paloma Faith in this month’s mag.

But we’ve also got a whole host of other goodness that we’re chucking your way just because we’re nice like that.

We’ve gone a bit mad in the Chippenham area looking at all the exciting stuff going on over there and being treated to a high dining gourmet menu in the process which was brilliant. Our Chippenham focus is on page 22.

Talking of great food, we also popped into the Magdalen Arms in Oxford for what was an absolutely fantastic bit of lunch. Read our review on page 27.

We also got sent a load of tea so we thought we would try our very own tea taste challenge. See how we did on page 30.

And you will also see that I somehow miraculously completed my marathon. It was the hardest thing that I’ve ever physically done. You can see my full write-up on page 8.

Apart from all of that we have a review of Oxford’s Ritual Union, an interview with The Twang ahead of their O2 Academy appearance, a preview of Buswell’s album launch, a look at a new book called Jokerface, a piece about dogs.

And then you have our usual fare like Bassett Rivers, Agony Girl, Michael Bosley, Luke Coleman, Brewery Bird, Gina Akers and Encyclopaedia Oceloticca which goes on about eating insects.

Write in to me at jamie@theocelot.co.uk

Jamie Hill

Editor: Jamie Hill - jamie@theocelot.co.uk Deputy: Ben Fitzgerald - ben@theocelot.co.uk Reporter: Claire Dukes - claire@theocelot.co.uk Sales: Dave Stewart dave@theocelot.co.uk - 07872 176999 Rosy Presley rosy@positivemediagroup. press - 07717 501790 Telephone: 01793 781986 Publisher: Positive Media Group, Unit 3, Arclite House, Peatmoor, Swindon SN5 5YN Printers: Stones, Badbury 23/10/2017 18:28

For Starters

The Nerd’s Last Word by Michael Bosley

Hotels are strange places; small worlds with their own rules, customs and quirks that we have learned to accept unquestioningly and where all human life can be found under one roof. Here we highlight some of the features you are likely to find in many hotels, many of which we would find odd or unacceptable in our own homes, but which we almost hope to expect when we stay away.

1. Literature on the back of the door All the best hotels have pages of notices on the back of the door informing you of the building’s layout, the fire points, how much you can and can’t smoke in the room, check-in times, check-out times and who was prime minister in 1922.

2. Crusty remote control The crusty remote control is an endearing feature of most hotels. Years of guest’s greasy leavings are deposited around the remote control buttons and only cursorily wiped by an unenthusiastic room maid once a month. This leaves us resorting to tapping the buttons carefully with the tip of our little finger and washing our hands after every use.

3. Four different layers of bed coverings The beds are usually so tightly made that the prospect of wrenching the bed covers free to get under them is often too much of a chore to bother with. And when we do, we’re faced with a plethora of layers, unable to decide which one to slip ourselves between; a quilted cover, a white sheet, a duvet and maybe another sheet for good measure.

4. Windows that don’t open much As a guest of the hotel, their insurance won’t cover acts of stupidity should you decide to hurl yourself from a 5th story window. Preventatively, all windows in hotel rooms are now limited to opening only just wide enough to allow

Hotels are strange places

a light whisp of fresh air into the room.

5. A little bit of water left in the kettle Some believe this is intentionally placed there just before you arrive to allow you to make a cup of tea without visiting the tap, others believe it’s been in there for three months and has grown its own society and democracy.

Extra points if the kettle takes three hours to boil a modest cup of water.

6. A confusing array of light switches You’ve had a long day and so you want nothing more than a stress-free flake-out and a hot shower. But first, you must complete the light switch challenge.

The first switches on the bathroom light, the second is the isolator for the fan, the third is for the desk lamp.

Then there are the ones by the bed that each control a different spotlight or lamp but also the main lights and also the desk lamps if you’re lucky.

Of course, neither of these will work if you have a keycard operated system and you’ve forgotten to plug your key-card in.

Not Russian into working with just anyone Off The Grid with Luke Coleman Our man in Iraq It just doesn’t end, and even I have ‘Iraq fatigue’ some days. With various factions lined up to contest Kirkuk – I’m writing this on 15 October – the tension in the office is similar to that from all the way back in June 2014, when The Shit Hawks of ISIS were raging through the region.

But to things rather more evergreen, and nothing has lasted the seasons of the last couple of years more vociferously coniferous than fake news, whether it be the deflective Twitterings of the sun downing Trump, or the more sinister state-organised shit posting of Russia, it’s something of a thing.

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Something else that’s a thing is extending a welcoming hand and a beer or two’s worth of advice to newbies in town. With no international flights in or out at the moment, there aren’t many about, but I did get a request to give a chap a soft landing, and of course I agreed.

He sent me a polite email overnight, maybe a bit heavy on detail and questions, but that wasn’t the problem. The problem is that he makes his coin through RT, formerly Russia Today. Even before last year’s election / referendum interfering, before the current indiscriminate bombing of civilians on behalf of Assad’s poisonous regime – don’t forget, the greatest mass murder in

my neighbour’s conflict is at the hands of the Syrian government – RT had all the credibility Nigel Farage’s cobbler. RT is Kremlin funded. It’s a propaganda outfit. There is no reason to break bread with this guy, sometimes a thing has its limit.

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Science Fact: Let them eat bugs

Crunch decision

by Ben Fitzgerald

No, honestly I’m full.. delicious though

There are more people than there ever have been - they’re everywhere you look… And they all need feeding.

Each year, around 70 million people are added to the world’s population - and while KFC is trying its level best to keep up there are just not enough budget boneless banquet bargain buckets to feed everyone.

Something’s got to give.

Apparently by 2050, the population of the planet is set to reach a staggering 9 billion…

And if they all want breakfast at the same time, all hell’s going to break loose.

One way around this is if everyone starts eating insects as one of their five a day.

Global food production is currently on a knife-edge - we in the ‘developed world’ are largely cushioned from this problem but the fact remains that we use 70% of agricultural

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land to raise livestock, our oceans are overfished, environments are becoming polluted and climate change and disease threaten crop production.

We already live in a world where almost a billion people are already chronically hungry - but perhaps our multi legged pals might be able to help us out.

Insects are actually pretty nutritious, with high fat, protein, vitamin and fibre content that are comparable with fish or livestock.

And they are better for the environment too - they are more efficient at turning feed into edible body mass and require less land to farm.

The most commonly eaten bugs are beetles, caterpillars, bees, wasps and ants.

When you think about it, they are no less strange to eat than prawns - with their waving arms and exo-skeletons and their creepy little black eyes staring

unemotionally at you from inside their pink skulls...

And anyway whether you are aware of it or not, we are already unwitting entomophagists (insect eaters) - with most of our food and drink, from flour and beer to fruit juice and curry powder containing some insect matter as an unavoidable part of the production process.

The only thing standing in our way, it seems, is that cultural barrier.

In the west we can’t imagine absent-mindedly scoffing down a bowl of crickets with a glass of red wine in front of an episode of Friends - but in many other parts of the world that is exactly what they do.

Unbelievable isn’t it?

To many of us living in the developed world, the thought that Friends would still be on the telly after all these years is difficult to comprehend.

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Running for my Life

The Marathon

By Jamie Hill On Sunday October 15, I attempted to run my very first marathon in aid of ICP Support in Birmingham.

It’s now three days later and I’m still broken.

I have aches in parts of my body that I didn’t know I even had and my biggest enemy is stairs. I hate stairs with a passion. I’m like a very tired dalek.

I was nervous. Nervous as hell.

In training, I had got up to 22 miles but this was 26.2 miles. How the hell was I going to manage that?

At the start line, the nerves really kicked in when I split from my family and found myself in a crowd of thousands of other runners all warming up.

I don’t like crowds when I’m running. I’ve always liked to run alone. I’m anti-social like that so this was bloody scary.

The thousands of people who surrounded me all looked like they knew what they were doing. They even had proper kit. I just had my old trainers, my phone, some headphones and about 7 energy gels secreted around my person.

There was some bloke at the front, probably a local radio DJ, trying to motivate the crowd with some inane chatter. To me, he was white noise. Just block him out.

And then we were off.

Urm. Actually no we weren’t.

As I had to actually shuffle for 15 minutes in the crowd until I reached the start line. The radio DJ was getting more annoying with every step.

And then we were off…

I don’t know if any of you are Monty Python fans but it was like the weak bladder marathon for the first 10 minutes with men disappearing behind trees for a quick wee and then out again.

Unfortunately women didn’t have that same option with at least a 10 minute queue at every toilet I passed.

For the first four miles, it was easy but I was finding it impossible to get into a rhythm. There were simply too many people. I didn’t know if I was going faster or slower than I normally go. it was impossible to tell.

At about mile three I passed four confused looking Ghostbusters whose car, that they had been carrying between them, was now a broken heap on the floor. I never saw them again.

From mile five to mile eight or nine, I was doing well, I seemed to be keeping pace with a rather tall sikh man in a yellow T-shirt. He was going at his own pace. I liked that.

But then I stupidly spotted a toilet at Edgbaston Cricket

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Club with no queue so I jumped in there. I was only gone a few seconds but my running colleague was now too far ahead to catch up. I could see the yellow T-shirt but he was now unreachable.

And all this time my legs and arms were busily pumping away step by step.

Something happened at 10 miles. It all just seemed too much. My head was trying to talk myself into stopping and my legs were joining in. There was open revolt.

My pace had slowed down by this point. My confidence had dissipated. I was by Cadbury World by this point. It smelt of chocolate. And all I could think of was how nice it would be to stop and dive in a VAT. I could even feign a leg injury. No-one would blame me.

But then I thought of all the money that I had raised for ICP Support, which was about £1,500 at this point. I’d have to pay it all back. I couldn’t afford that.

Money’s a great motivation.

I had organised my wife to see me on one of the loops at 16 miles. So with that in mind I thought to myself that I will at least survive until that point.

So I kept going.

It was becoming increasingly clear that I had slowed down a lot. I was still running but it was just the movement now and not the speed.

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Running for my Life Each mile was now taking an age.

Just as I reached mile 16, I got a text from my wife saying she wasn’t able to get there and would see me at mile 20.

So I kept going.

It was at this point I noticed that most of the people around me seemed to be walking.

But I was still running.

But they were still going faster than me.

One person was dressed as a giant bee.

It was a bit demotivating.

And then as if someone had let the dogs out, the Birmingham Half Marathon started and suddenly there were loads more people.

I was now surrounded by runners sprinting. They were all around me. I could no longer spot any other marathon runners. Where were all my slowie mates?

It was quite disconcerting.

Finally I got to mile 20. I was looking for my wife.

I couldn’t see her anywhere. Then I received another message. She would see me at mile 25.

I kept going.

The crowds were brilliant and very supportive. They would give runners out jelly babies and other sweets.

They would shout my name as I approached. To each one I would smile, which probably at this point looked like a pained grimace.

I loved each and every one of them except for the man gave who gave out ‘Fruit Gums’ rather than a softer chewy sweet as I nearly choked to death on his bloody sweet. ‘Fruit Gum’ man was being cursed under my breath for the next 10 minutes.

Everything at this point was now a blur. I just smiled and waved at people as I stumbled past. Giving kids ‘high fives’ if they held up their hands.

I just kept on going.

Mile 23 came and went.

I just kept on going.

Then there was Mile 24.

I was overtaken by someone dressed as a dragon.

For the last few miles I kept spotting casualties. People who weren’t able to go on being tended to by St John Ambulance crews.

At Mile 25, I suddenly felt a hand on my back. It was my brother Bill who had been spectating. I smiled at him and he stayed with me for a few seconds and then he was gone. A few steps later I saw my mum.

But I still hadn’t seen Rachel.

Every bone in my body ached. I felt light-headed. My legs wanted to stop more than anything.

And then I saw my wife and my son George just around the corner and I nearly burst into tears.

They cheered me on and I suddenly had renewed energy. For the first time I thought I could actually do this.

I had less than a mile to go.

The crowds were cheering.

There was a ‘400 metres to go’ sign.

It was the longest 400 metres of my life.

And then I saw the finish.

And then I was over the line.

And I immediately stopped not knowing what to do.

My body still wanting to carry on it was so used to the movement. I was confused.

I had finished.

I had just run a marathon.

I looked around. I couldn’t get my head around how I had survived the last 10 miles. It’s beyond me how I managed to actually do it.

Someone was speaking to me. It was a steward. He was guiding me to walk on a bit so I was out of the way of the finish line. I nodded and shuffled in the direction he wanted me to go.

Someone handed me a bag. It had a silver sheet in it and a medal. I put both on.

I had just run a marathon.

I had done it.

I wasn’t even out of breath. I could hardly think straight and my body was a ruin but I was breathing normally. That’s the thing I remember.

It’s now a few days later. I’ve hardly been able to walk since.

I still feel drained. But I now have this sense of actually achieving something for the rest of my life.

It was the most difficult physical thing that I’ve ever done and I still can’t believe I actually did it.

According to my justgiving page I managed to raise £1755.39 from donations plus £340.85 of Gift Aid giving my efforts a grand total of £2096.24 for ICP Support. The page is still open if you want to help at www.justgiving.com/fundraising/james-hill36

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Bassett

The

Rivers Scary news for scary times...

Echo

Satan sues newspaper for defamation after ‘Katie Hopkins is devil’ claim

Council celebrates annual purge as community success

by Kit Chentable

BASSETT Rivers Council is celebrating another successful annual purge.

Speaking from the bombed out wreckage of the council offices Conservative Group leader Council Leader Dave Fox heralded the annual event a success.

He said: “This is only its second year but I’m pleased to say that this year’s event really showed the rest of the world what Bassett Rivers is made of.

“Our celebrations, which culminated in a huge wicker man full of traffic wardens, hipster baristas and reality television stars on the village green, even had the added benefit of helping solve our unemployment figures by creating

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more job vacancies.

“I think everybody laughed when the wicker man finally got lit and one of the Cheeky Girls was heard frantically trying to escape to no avail.

“As a village it really brought us together as we all vented our fury at all those snowflakes, remoaners and ‘experts’ that had been getting on our wick all year.

“It was a way to bond with our fellows and let out all of our frustrations for one 24 hour period.

I even got involved myself. Although this year I only managed a good maiming. I’m hoping that next year I will be able to work my way up to murder.”

The 24 hour carnage resulted in 105 maimings, 52 deaths, 234

acts of wanton vandalism and an incident where someone swapped all the trollies at Sainsbury’s with trollies from Tesco just to confuse people.

Bassett Rivers resident Ivor Chiponmyshoulder said: “Last year, I did what most people did and simply boarded up my house to wait it out but this year I thought I would stop being such a party pooper and get into the swing of so I went on a killing spree in Argos.

“I’ve got to say that it was really satisfying and next year I’ve got my eye on a spree at the local Costa Coffee as have you seen how bloody expensive their coffees are nowadays?”

Terence Trent D’arby was unavailable for comment.

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Brexit negotiations descend into chaos over ‘what f**king biscuits?’ row Bassett Rivers MP Bane ‘Drive-by’ Bullet’s monthly Column

By Livi Ngroom BREXIT negotiations were at a standstill last night after the EU and the UK could not decide what fucking biscuits to have with their coffee and tea.

EU Chief Negotiator Michel Barnier branded the UK Secretary of State for the European Union David Davis as a ‘fucking idiot’ after the Brit insisted that they have chocolate digestives instead of chocolate bourbons.

Mr Barnier said: “Everybody knows that Bourbons are nicer than chocolate digestives and you’re a fucking moron if you think otherwise.

“The negotiations had started so well after we decided that we would break at 11am for tea and coffee and I asked the simple question ‘should we get some biccies to go with it?’

“It’s now three months later and we still haven’t decided what biscuits to have. We came close when someone suggested Jaffa Cakes but then no-one could work out whether they were actually cakes or biscuits.

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“The EU hard right parties are now pressing us to choose Garibaldis as that will really upset the Brits and I’ve got half a mind to side with them especially after Boris Johnson suggested custard creams. What a wanker.”

The UK negotiating team are headed back to Brussells after Prime Minister Theresa May announced that ‘no biscuits would be better than bad biscuits’.

Secretary of State for the European Union David Davis said: “We are, like, going back to show those bloody Europeans that we won’t be cow-towed to by anyone especially when it comes to biscuits.

“The stupid tossers even suggested that we get a range of biscuits but I just looked the stupid cockwomble in the eye and told him that we would not be paying any money towards a variety pack and that one pack should be sufficient and to stop riding the European gravy train by getting more and more biscuits. We want hard biscuits not these soft biscuits that these Europeans want.”

I iz well excited as I av become a reality telly star.

Dere iz dis programme called Question Time and I like went on it 2 ‘av me say on da fact dat dere iz not enuff Nazi Zombie levelz on da new version of Call of Duty and dat dey need 2 bring back dose chocolate barz called Spiraz as dey were lush.

But dey did not want me 2 talk about da stuff dat I wanted 2 talk about as dere were all dese people in da audience dat rudely kept askin’ questionz.

Dere were dese ovva peepz on da show which wuz hosted by a man called David Dimpleface. Dese ovva peepz included some journalist from da Daily Mail who I caught doin’ Nazi salutez in da green room like some of da Nazi zombiez do in da latest Call of Duty game. I tried 2 talk 2 him about it before we went on but when I mentioned da game he just said it shuld be banned as dey like bannin’ tings at da Daily Mail.

Da ovva guestz in da green room were dis guy called Iain Duncin Donut, Vince Cable TV and human Fredo Nigel Farage who said he wuz from U kip. I told ‘im I didn’t want 2 kip and ‘U kip’ instead and he just laffed.

Anyway, da show wuz bangin’ especially when dey heard me rap about Theresa May in a love triangle wiv me boss Jez Corbyn and Howard from da Halifax adz.

Da Daily Mail geezer got in an argument wiv me as he tried 2 claim that me biatch (mum) wuz a scrounger on benefitz and I put him straight dat she did get benefitz but also worked really hard on da game like all da ovva biatches (mumz) on da estate. Dat shut him up.

I iz gettin’ used 2 dis politicz game now and da people seem 2 like me as dey ‘ave now asked me to go on dis ovva programme called Newsnight 2 discuss da economic benefitz of leavin’ da European Union. I told dem dere iz none as I still want to get me cheap booze and ciggiez from Calais.

Respect!

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Get Away

Hold on tight for the Winter Carnival

The first of two superb days of jump racing kicks off our most-high profile meeting of the season – The Ladbrokes Winter Carnival, which takes place on December 1.

Winners on the day last year included Jenkins,

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Clan des Obeaux and Unowhatimeanharry who followed in the footsteps of Big Bucks, Inglis Drever and Thistelcrack in landing the Grade 2 Long Distance Hurdle.

It’s a great opportunity to try one of the great restaurants,

at Newbury Racecourse with exceptional dining packages available in both the Hennessy and the Racegoers.

Gates open at 10am, the first race is 12.30 and the last race will be held at 15.50. www.newburyracecourse.co.uk

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Get a Life

Me, my dog and I

By Claire Dukes

One of my favourite things about dogs, particularly puppies, is how they can break down a fully grown man.

Admittedly I have never wanted to fully test the theory, just in case I happened upon a legit psychopath. Only a pyschopath could hurt a dog.

Pictured on the right is myself and Daisy the day I brought her home at eight weeks. As she is a doberman, and now two, she is triple the size. I like to believe, what with Sunday roast leftovers and sofa privileges, that she has a good quality of life. Why wouldn’t you love your dog, and spoil them a little?

If Daisy were a human, I reckon she’d be equivalent to a lower middle class child. She gets treats and rewards, but on the whole she’s had a pretty humble upbringing. So it is weird when people accuse me of coddling, because ultimately the bitch knows her place.

With a certain amount of training, old dogs can learn new tricks. There are even puppy schools where dogs can actually graduate as ‘Superstars’, like at Janet’s Puppy Skool in Swindon.

Janet’s Bouvier des Flandres, Mack, actually fetches the phone when it rings along with a unique routine which involves a wheel barrow and fake cat.

With Daisy, the extent of my expertise and patience has pretty much got the whole down, sit, stay thing smashed. But tricks like twirling and roll over? Not so much. But hey, I just wanted a canine companion. I also have a full-time job.

What I do like about Janet’s approach to dog training is that she focuses on important life skills such as taking your dog to the pub, a quintessential part of Brit culture. But there are times when, like all healthy relationships, my dog and I need

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some alone time.

When I do get the opportunity to holiday, granted rarely and for a short amount of time, Daisy hits the kennels. As a child, and 25 year old, kennels really doesn’t have a great ring to it. But essentially she’s fed, makes a few friends and is looked after by dog nuts. She can hardly complain.

Then I heard about WaggingTails. Essentially this is a company which provides a sort of bed and breakfast service for dogs whilst said owner goes away, meanwhile your dog stays in a designated carer’s home. Such dog boarding programmes include central heating, a bed, frequent walks and cuddles. I can only imagine where Paris Hilton’s pooches spend their vacations.

Don’t get me wrong dogs should be well looked after, but I can’t wrap the idea around my head that my dog can go on an all inclusive vacation and I have only ever read about them.

What if after a two week holiday at a carer’s house, who’s job it is to look after them 24/7, your dog doesn’t want to come home? Or they get never-ending holiday blues?

I’m of the belief that your lifestyle and your dog’s should not be too dissimilar (with the exception of homelessness).

For me, I think kennels is the most aligned destination to my holiday budgeting. The accomadation is modest, food is as it comes and sights are as good as you make them.

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by fashion writer Gina Akers

Style

Left, top to bottom: Next mid calf slouch boots, Sorel Joan Rain Wedge boots, Espirit Star Wecge Ankle boots, AS 98 Black Leather boots from Look Again.

Right, top to bottom: Bäumler 100% Wool Navy Blue Slim Fit Suit from Dobell, Dobell Light Blue Shirt, Missoni Parfum Pour Homme.

The colder months are now sweeping in so time to get your chill factor style on form.

A great pair of winter boots are always a good start. If you have the budget for a few options for luxury go for suede (or even velvet which is on trend for materials this season) to wear on colder dry days, and for practical but current looks leather is the best choice as it fairs better on those typically rainy winter days. For an easy to wear go to look the Star Wedge Ankle Boots by Esprit (£68.00) are perfect and for an all round style solution Black Leather Boots by A.S.98 (£195.00) are ideal, both available from www. lookagain.co.uk

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Next’s Mid-Calf Slouch Boots (£65.00) are available in black or brick to wow a winter going out look or set off a super smart day to day style, from www.next.co.uk For winter weather extremes Sorel boots are a great investment such as the Joan Rain Wedge Gloss Boot (£140.00) from www.sorelfootwear.co.uk A key winter coat that will last the season is an absolute must. A wearable mid length style including the Azoba Knitted Coat by G.I.G.A DX (£112.00 from www.lookagain.co.uk) and the Next Funnel Neck Coat (£62.00 available in grey or black at www.next.co.uk) are leading looks this winter with fuller length militarily

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and as Win winter Only (£ almost The smart c Longlin Sweate next.co with leg thick tig For g

Style

to bottom: d calf slouch orel Joan dge boots, ar Wecge ots, AS 98 ather boots k Again.

p to Bäumler Wool Navy Fit Suit bell, Dobell e Shirt, Parfum Pour

and asymmetrical coats for really wrapping up warm.

Winter fashion just wouldn’t feel right without warm winter sweaters. The Link Long Sweater Blazer by Only (£40.00 at www.lookagain.co.uk) will go with almost anything.

The trend for transitional style of leisurewear to smart casual looks can easily be achieved with a Longline Hoody in Navy or Pink or Longline Cosy Sweater in Berry or Grey (£28.00 each from www. next.co.uk), wear with jeans for ultimate warmth, team with leggings, or if you are feeling daring wear with thick tights in a sweater-dress style.

For guys its time to think warmer with suits made

from more insulating fabrics such as wool. The Bäumler 100% Wool Navy Blue Slim Fit Suit (£289.99) is your perfect winter season smart attire, visit www.dobell. co.uk Long sleeve shirts should also be on the winter looks list, try the Dobell Light Blue Shirt (£9.99).

For men Missoni Parfum Pour Homme is a must, it is the iconic Italian knitwear brand’s first men’s perfume launch in 20 years. It is a fragrance of contrasts - fresh citrus with soft lavender, spicy ginger with aromatic jasmine, comforting sandalwood with passionate patchouli. Presented in a dark crystal bottle with subtle hues refracted through light, from £45.00 at www.harrods.com

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Tech

ON YOUR BIKE

By Claire Dukes Image @MobikeUK

There are so many reasons to get on your bike.

For starters bikes are cheap, especially in comparison to pretty much every other type of transport (minus walking).

Bikes are also low maintenance, don’t require tax (yet) and let’s face it can make you feel a little Français.

I’m not a mad biker myself as I fear the wars between bikes and any other vehicle on the road. I am however particial to a lesuirely ride off the beaten track, y’know the type of journey that accommodates a blanket and picnic basket.

To be fair I’d probably be inclined to opt for cycling if there was more of an initiative in place with proper designated cycling lanes. When I visited Copenhagen cycling from place to place was actually a really pleasant experience and I felt safe - all very Do Ri Mi. The Danes have got it down, and as of October so have Oxford.

Oxford announced they will

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getting rid of all petrol and diesel vehicles from the city centre.

In part of a scheme with Cycle. land and Mobike, Oxford will see an influx of bright bikes in a bid to decrease CO2 emissions. The dream is to become the world’s first zero emission zone, and I am bloody routing for them. And why not? It’s a fabulous and forwardthinking idea!

The innovative scheme was designed by Chinese company Mobike, to encourgage more people to opt for bikes as their mode of transportation when taking small trips across cities. It is both sustainable and affordable.

No Excuses really.

Furthermore, unlike Boris bikes, Mobike are an app-based and dockless service. An embedded GPS system will allow app users to locate the nearest bike to their location - kind of like Uber. By scanning the code provided the bike will lock and unlock via the Internet of Things (IoT) platform.

Along for the ride is Cycle.

land, Oxford’s highly rated bike sharing company. Teaming up, both companies are striving to reduce Oxford’s carbon footprint as well as produce a large distribution of bikes securely and safely.

For every half an hour on the bike, the cyclist will be charged a grand total of 50p. The only thing I imagine that might put people off initially is the £29 deposit, but if you leave the bike in one piece it’s completely refundable.

I believe that with more bikes out and about road users will become more conscious and aware of their presence, which will hopefully give more people, like myself, the confidence to saddle up.

With Oxford’s vibrant bike scene already well established, the scheme will no doubt hit the ground running and hopefully encourage other councils to get involved.

It’s good for the planet, it’s good for you and it’s a great use of technology.

www.theocelot.co.uk

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23/10/2017 18:28

Screenzone: TV Aren’t they cute?

You’re Fired!

Screen Grab A TV column by Jamie Hill There is a perfect television show out there.

It’s been going for years and has a formula that is absolutely perfect. Although not much changes.

I’m talking about The Apprentice which returned to our screens in October.

It is a fabulous slice of television. Everything about it works. From the sociopaths you love to hate to the music, to the denouement where someone gets the chop.

With other reality shows, they try and get you to empathise with the personalities. You’ll usually have a bit of plinky plonky music as they tell you the sad tale of how both their parents died in an unfortunate abseiling accident and that they’ve lived in a matchbox on the side of the M40 ever since. Not so much with The Apprentice. The show doesn’t want you to like the contestants. It wants you to see that they’re all a bit wanky.

In that way it’s more honest.

The formula is fantastic and like the music it follows the same very watchable beats every episode.

It goes like this...

1. Early morning wake-up call.

2. Alan Sugar sets a task.

3. Two teams then plan the task having elected a team leader.

4. Both teams are made to look idiots as they make loads of mistakes in the task.

5. They then get to the board room where it is

A Sugar sandwich

revealed which team failed the least.

6. The winning team has a luxury treat whilst the losing team goes to a dingy cafe and drinks lukewarm tea.

7. The final boardroom showdown between three losers as to who will get fired by Alan Sugar.

8. Biggest loser gets fired.

It’s brilliant television and weirdly it’s never predictable as the team you think is going to win never does and an insignificant action by one team member ends up being the grand mistake for the whole episode and he or she gets fired and then complains in a taxi that he or she will show them before disappearing forever.

The current crop look like a fun lot with the girls so far being especially at each other’s throats. The sad thing is it’s actually a pretty accurate reflection of the shallow quicksand corporate lifestyle. Not exactly a life most of us would want to aspire to but each to their own.

But as televisual voyeurism it’s pretty damn good.

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23/10/2017 18:28

Screenzone: Gaming

Game Changers

By Claire Dukes

Watching someone play video games is so boring.

The last time I played and enjoyed video games was during the era of Banjo-Kazooie, Super Mario and GoldenEye on Nintendo 64. Since then, die.

By default it is of no surprise that the idea of sitting and watching someone play video games could not thrill me less. I remember watching groups of grown men playing COD as if they were actually accomplishing something. It all just seemed so mindless to me.

Many years later, I found a game changer.

I was first introduced to Uncharted hungover, eating breakfast. At first it was just another game, but then I heard actual dialogue that wasn’t skipped over. An hour later I was fixated as I followed a treasure hunting avatar, Nathan Drake, who was conflictingly attractive.

I later found myself immersed amongst an actionpacked adventure involving less than average holiday destinations and a not-so-dead brother. Plot twist! I was engrossed.

Granted the player must fulfil a series of quests and challanges, which in itself isn’t ground-breaking, however Uncharted is outstandingly led by its progressive narrative and first-class graphics almost making it less of a video game and more of a cinematic experience. Alongside the graphics is also incredible orchestral compoistions, more commonly associated with films.

Furthermore Uncharted moves towards open gaming as a RPG (role playing game).

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It’s unlike anything I’d, personally, ever seen from a video game. At least that is until I saw the trailers for Death Stranding.

Death Stranding is Hideo Kojima’s first venture through solo studio Kojima Productions, since his split from Konami.

At first I thought it was a movie with a gaming aesthetic to produce a unique and quirky style. I experienced fear, my muscles clenching and intrigue over a video game.

Personally, I cannot recall, this is the first time that I have seen actors voice and act in a video game which is not directly tied to a movie franchise. I believe in the gaming world this is what is refered to as the next level.

Set in an apocalyptic and seemingly dystopian nightmare, the trailer incorporates cinematic techniques which ambigously advance on Norman Reedus, Guillermo del Toro and Mads Mikkelsen.

On top of Hollywood appearances the viewer encounters skeleton soldiers, questionably undead babies in and out of jars, a sea of oil, washed up crabs/dolphins and snippets of a soundtrack that lies somewhere between Drive and Stranger Things. These features are all very a-typical and enigmatic motifs found in film trailers. Considering it’s a ‘fictional’ game, I’m already identifying climate change, pollution, dictatorship and misplacement of identity. Whether or not this will be as immersive as Uncharted, I don’t know.

But Death Stranding is already incoporating intrigue and involvement towards the storyline which I’m really eager to follow.

In my eyes, this new era of video game overlays the CGI elements of techniques used on characters in film. For instance, take Peter Cushing and Carrie Fisher’s virtual treatment in Star Wars. It is them, but it isn’t. Are the boundaries starting to merge? Is this the birth of a new hybrid genre between video games and films?

I’m in.

www.theocelot.co.uk

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23/10/2017 18:28

Screenzone: Film

Did somebody say fake news?

Demanding the truth, as seen on Netflix A film column by Claire Dukes As always there has been a series of Marvel mishaps violating our screens throughout the year.

I for one have grown tired of these popcorn projects.

I wouldn’t necessarily call it a movement, but I’d strongly suggest that there is a demand for the return of reality. In response, 2017 has churned out some cuttingedge documentaries.

The Death And Life Of Marsha P. Johnson opens up the cold case of trans icon Marsha, who was found dead in the Hudson River 1992. Concluded by police as a suicide, there are many who strongly believe she was murdered. The case remains unsolved.

Alongside the investigation runs the story of trans activist, and anti-violence project member, Sylvia Rivera.

The exploration into Marsha’s death and the rights of the transgender community highlights the manipulative role of authoritive figures. If this seems irrelvent today, the doc also resurfaces the homocide commited by James Dixon in 2016. He killed a trans woman out of “blind fury” for not realising she was biologically a he and recieved just 12 years. Leap over to 2017 and this is where I tag in Icarus.

Starting off as a curious experiment filmmaker and cyclist Bryan Fogel trials doping, aiming to expose the process and the truth behind it.

After a chance meeting with the director of Moscow’s Anti-Doping Centre, Grigory Rodchenkov, Bryan, Grigory and Netflix find themselves amidst the Russian doping scandal which fllows the trail all the way up to the Russian Government and Vladimir Putin.

“Putin will kill me“ Threat and danger are the responses from governing bodies, in both films, for trying to uncover the truth.

At what point do we disconnect investiogative documentaries with sheer drama? Has the artificial escapism of blockbusters started to distort our brains?

The Death And Life Of Marsha P. Johnson and Icarus both incorporate typical cinematic conventions, both including archive footage and interviews to drive the investigations forward. In doing so these docs rise against the common misconception that factual things are boring, on par with people’s immediate shun towards black and white films.

Forget the hypodermic needle model and the suspension of disbelief, this is the best antidote to Hollywood’s denseness which is long overdue: explorative documatries as a response to social malpractice. But the kind of social injustice that the Avengers can’t fix.

These films provide their medium with a prestigious identity for depicting social realism, the content of each unapologetically punching people in their faces.

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23/10/2017 18:28

Focus on Chippenham

Cultural Chi During the past few years Chippenham has been celebrating a cultural renaissance with diverse venues, eateries and drinking establishments opening their doors in the Wiltshire historic market town. The town which is ideally located on both Bath and Swindon’s doorstep is surrounded by history on every side from Westonbirt to Bowood to Lacock and it was also the site for one of Alfred The Great’s palaces. We thought we would check this cultural gem of a town out...

There are some great places to go once you get to Chippenham. There are two things that instantly strike you when you have a wonder around from a sense of history to a sense that this is a town with plenty of stuff going on.

Eating, drinking and listening Pubs wise there are some great places to go and sup a few ales and relax. We would recommend The Three Crowns on The Causeway if you want a great taste of real ale as this is an establishment that goes that extra mile when finding some pretty special brews.

For music we would recommend a visit to the local scene mainstay The Old Road Tavern on Old Road.

The venue has been hosting music nights for aeons and is basically run by music lovers for music lovers.

Other music pubs include The Buttercross in Market Place which is also known for its fantastic selection of beer.

When it comes to chowing down on some food Rivo Lounge has bulit up a bit of a name for itself as a place to have lazy breakfasts and great dinners. Other recommendations would include The Gladstone Arms in Gladstone Road.

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Sightseeing and shopping Chippenham is a pretty beautiful town and is just lovely to have a walk around failing all else. On its doorstep is either Lacock, probably the site of more film and TV locations than any other place in the UK and Bowood House and Gardens.

Castle Combe is just down the road as well and probably one of the most stunning Cotswold villages you’re ever likely to see. The neighbouring Castle Combe Circuit is also well worth a visit.

Events and festivals Chippenham has a hell of a lot going on all the time. But the biggest event of the year has to be the world renowned Chippenham Folk Festival which takes place on the last Bank Holiday weekend in May and sees the entire town taken over by morris dancers and folk musicians. It’s a pretty special event.

There’s also new kid on the block Chippfest which is going from strength to strength every year which takes place every June and early July and is a full scale arts and music festival.

www.theocelot.co.uk

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Focus on Chippenham

hippenham The Neeld

The Neeld has been at the heart of Chippenham for centuries – as its Corn Exchange and cheese hall, even a wartime hospital, then a community hall. Now it has begun its latest life as an exciting new community and arts centre bringing great professional shows and local groups’ activities and projects.

The recent refurbishment and improvement project,

by Chippenham Town Council, has transformed this beautiful Victorian venue with comfortable tiered seating, a brand new bar area and top quality sound and light equipment.

The refurbishment scheme has also seen the front of house area of the adjoining Town Hall improved to provide a multi-purpose customer services and venue lobby/box office.

The artistic programming offers high quality, bold and challenging shows for all ages – an exciting new entertainment offer for Chippenham while ensuring ticket prices are affordable and accessible.

The venue can also be hired. It is an extremely

flexible space which makes it perfect to host a great variety of events and performances from concerts, theatre plays to private functions and community shows.

This year we’ve seen massive acts stopping by Chippenham because of the Neeld including some top tier comedians as well as musicians like Hugh Cornwell from The Stranglers. It’s definitely put Chippenham on the cultural map Upcoming events November 10 - Richard Digance November 18 - North Wilts Symphony Orchestra November 25 - The Wurzels December 3 - A Christmas Carol December 8 - Vienna Festival Ballet presents Sleeping Beauty December 10 - 4 Stars Dance presents When The Stars Come Out January 26 - The ELO Encounter To book tickets or to get in contact call 01249 446699 or visit www.neeld.co.uk

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Brews and Eats

Star quality food

By Ben Fitzgerald Appreciation of the Bybrook restaurant begins with the journey.

Eye-achingly beautiful stone cottages frame the narrow twisting road leading to the heart of the Cotswold village of Castle Combe. And the drama continues at the grand entrance of the Manor House Hotel where automatic gates glide open to welcome visitors up a sweeping driveway towards the 14th century building.

I was left slack jawed with wonder, as we entered a wonderland of indulgence - it was pure theatre.

The Michelin starred Bybrook restaurant is part of The Manor Hotel, set in a 14th century building and surrounded by 365 acres of Cotswold countryside.

We had been invited to sample the restaurant’s Autumn menu which has been carefully curated by executive chef Robert Potter - the creative driving force

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behind the classically influenced food served in the restaurant.

Robert has recently retained his Michelin star, originally awarded last year and confirmed for 2018. He explained that the hotel’s well stocked kitchen garden provides inspiration for many of his dishes.

The hotel also has a wellstocked kitchen garden that provides inspiration and produce for the restaurant’s menu design.

We were treated to the 8-course tasting menu - a culinary journey through the best of what the restaurant can offer - showcasing the skills of chef Potter and his talented team.

Every dish had been chosen to complement the next - with care taken not to overload the palate.

And every detail had been considered with obsessive care, even down to the wine choice.

We began with a crab dish exquisitely arranged on the plate with hand rolled macaroni, Exmoor caviar and a shellfish

foam. Then followed a cavalcade of dishes - each one appealing as much to the mind and the eye as to the tastebuds. Salmon confit with beetroot and horseradish, foie gras, halibut with sea pursland. Then a change of direction to bold savory flavours of beef, oxtail, pancetta and truffles before being confronted with a trio of puddings so beautifully displayed that it seemed almost rude to dig in and spoil the arrangement.

As you might expect, such perfection comes with a price tag to match - The tasting menu is £89 per person and wine pairings are available for £55 per person.

But to my mind you are left with a memory that will linger with you for years. Find the time and save the money - dining at the Bybrook is an experience you will never regret - I promise. www.exclusive.co.uk/themanor-house/restaurants-bars/ the-bybrook

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Brews and Eats

The perfect pairing

By Darren Willmott If the start of the year is about abstinence, and spring/summer is about finding a wine to match the warmer weather, autumn is surely about finding the right wine to match your festive foods.

Whether planning a smaller get-together with friends or facing the military-style organisation of co-ordinating the wider family, Christmas meals are a focal point of the season and frequently extend out to a cheese course.

A certifiable classic, the words ‘Port and Stilton’ trip off the tongue almost as a single word. Traditional at Christmas, specially packaged sets are easy to find in the supermarkets at this time of year but it’s worth remembering there are many other wine and cheese combinations to try, not just at Christmas, but the whole year round.

So settle down, bring your cheese up to room temperature, and check out the following suggestions.

Matching tip: Contrast and Compare: A wine’s natural acidity acts as the counterpoint to the weight and fatty texture of a cheese and, when suitably matched, will enhance the natural flavour.

Like all food/wine matching, your main aim is to avoid one flavour overpowering the other.

Hard Cheese – With as much of the moisture removed as possible the flavours of harder cheeses are magnified, even more so as they age. Pair the cheese with a wine of equal intensity; extra mature or older cheeses will need a fuller flavoured wine, and vice versa for cheeses of a subtler nature.

Try Cabernet Sauvignon with Cheddar or Gouda, the dry, grainy tannins and light herb spices will complement the austere

and crumbly nature of the cheese.

Nuttier cheese such as Comté will go well with oxidised wines such as Amontillado or Oloroso Sherry.

Soft Cheese – The creamy/ fatty nature acts just like a sponge, soaking up and magnifying the fruitier flavours of the wine. In a similar way to a Müller Fruit Corner yoghurt, the dash of pure fruit will expand and create a whole palate of creamy flavour.

The soft, fruit-forward style of a Pinot Noir works splendidly with Brie, as does the fruity citric nature of Sauvignon Blanc when paired with Mozzarella.

The bubbles and fresh acidity of sparkling wine go particularly well with Camembert and, if pairing Feta, go for a sweeter wine to offset the saltiness.

Goat’s Cheese - Not to everyone’s taste, goat’s cheese with Sauvignon Blanc, especially the citric style from the Loire as opposed to the riper new world examples, is a majestic

combination.

Other whites that work well are Albarino from Spain and Picpoul from France.

Blue Cheese - The bold savoury character of blue cheese needs a wine with ‘oomph’ to match it and, although the sweetness of Port is a firm favourite, don’t be afraid to try a sweeter Riesling from Germany or Alsace.

If heading away from the more obvious cheese choices, just as with wider food and wine matching, a good rule of thumb is to match wines and cheeses from the same country, so if it’s a creamy/nutty Manchego you want to pair up, look for a Spanish wine.

Lastly, if you’re planning on eating a ‘stinky’ cheese don’t go looking for a stinky wine! Instead contrast the stronger aromas with something subtle and fresh to cut through the heavier notes.

Cheers!

Read Darren’s blog at vinesight.me

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Brews and Eats

An insight into St Aldates

The Brewery Bird Column

In a series of one-on-one interviews, Brewery Bird gets the low-down from some of Ocelotshire’s most hard-working and beer-championing licensees with a no-holes barred, full frontal approach in…..Meet The Publican!

Name: Nicholas West Pub: St Aldates Tavern, Oxford City Centre How long have you worked in the pub trade?

Eleven years - starting part time behind the bar in a small country pub in Surrey. I fell in love with the trade there, moved to Brighton for my first Managerial positions before stints in London, Cambridge and Oxford so far.

What made you want to become a publican/ licensee?

When I was at Uni in Brighton, I decided I preferred working behind the bar as opposed to becoming an Accountant. It was the best decision I ever made!

Describe yourself using three beer style characteristics: Bright, Sessionable, Full bodied Where do you think the future of ‘the local pub’ lies?

Getting the demographic right is paramount to a successful Local Pub. Attracting the right type of customer is equally as important as customers finding the right type of pub in which to enjoy a drink.

In my experience the’ local’ vibe is something that is created by having a happy, loyal local clientele which is maintained by the licensee and staff - retention

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is key - equally a good local pub is welcoming to strangers, some of which in turn will become locals.

Excluding this one, if you could run a pub anywhere in the world, where would it be, and why?

Well until the hurricanes took it out, I would have loved to have run the bar on Nekka Island; Richard Branson’s private Island in the Caribbean. It had the sand, the sea, the sailing weather, and looked amazing.

Which three famous people (from history or alive today) would you most like to share a pint with, and why?

Dennis Bergkamp - my childhood hero when I started supporting Arsenal in the 90’s, doubt I would be able to ask many questions, perhaps just an autograph and a photo or two.

David Attenborough - one of the most knowledgeable people on wildlife and such a great voice. I would love to hear about the travels and experiences of his many years in the business.

John Cleese - the sheer comedy genius of Mony Python is enough reason and what mixes better than comedy and beer!

What words of wisdom would you give someone thinking of running their own pub?

Don’t forget to have a life! Long hours are to be expected. I topped 93 hours one week and vowed never to do it again. The whole point of running a pub for me is to be able to enjoy it.

If you could have a superpower; what would it be, and why?

A locator for lost things – I’m constantly looking for pump clips! Or occasionally when a member of staff comes in and says they have lost their till key, I could tell them which pocket or room they left it in this time!

www.theocelot.co.uk

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Brews and Eats

REVIEW: The Magdalen Arms Gastro Pub

By Claire Dukes 243 Iffley Rd, Oxford OX4 1SJ I always hesitate when someone suggests a pub lunch because I know what’s coming, and it’s usually from a packet.

I’m sat there with a somewhat cattish arrogance, turning my nose up at what is obviously a microwaved meal fresh from the back of a truck. Since such encounters I’ve found myself cooking more and dining out less.

But there are game changers.

On one of our Ocelot team days out, we headed to Oxford. Having spent much time in the area, Ben and I followed our editor Jamie who was making a beeline for the Magdalen Arms.

Now there’s a pub lunch, and then there’s a gastropub pub lunch.

At a pub lunch you find a table, peruse the menus plastered with day-by-day deals, head to the bar, order, and enjoy a relatively average meal. It’s good, because now you’re full.

But a gastropub lunch is a well orchestrated fine-dining experience made casual, with incredibly high quality and fresh food. You can also be sure that the menu will change throughout the day, depending on what the chef has or wants to conjure up.

Walking into the Magdalen Arms is unapologetically disconcerting.

It may feel a little dim, and a little dark at first, but it’s not oppressive.

On the cusp of autumn we were welcomed by a quaint kind of cosiness complete with homey

wooden furniture, and the kind of lamps which are equal to gold in vintage shops.

Judge me all you will but it took me from our basket of focaccia, a couple of sips of Simonds cider and a few mouthfuls of melt-inyour-mouth hake to realise why this was all too familiar. The Magdalen Arms is related to London’s Anchor & Hope and Great Queen Street.

Now in the gastropub circuit, this is finding gold.

As were on a bit of a tight schedule we bypassed starters and dived into the mains, which was an indecisive process across the board so it was probably for the best.

I went for the roast hake (£17), laid on a bed of of lentils with garden spinach vinaigrette and aioli. The last time I had fish this good and of this quality was actually at the Anchor & Hope.

Crispy on top and so delicate throughout, this dish reminded me why I’m happy to stretch the purse strings: a bloody exquisite meal.

Our pasta fiend editor, Jamie, went for the tagliatelle (£14). With sheer satisfaction he said: “this is proper homemade pasta, succulent in every bite. I have to say that this has to be the best tagliatelle I have ever eaten. The Magdalen Arms has really captured the essence of Italian cuisine and put

their own touch on top.”

Staring sadly at the now vanished rose veal schnitzel (£16), deputy editor Ben explained: “My slab of tenderised meat was melt in the mouth scrummy - the whole dish was totally amazing.”

The overall experience was a fabulous balance between relaxed and professional. The Ocelot will be eagerly returning to the Magdalen Arms.

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Brews and Eats

Salad... sorted

Roasted beetroot, carrot, lentil and cumin seed salad

Cooked lentils are useful for throwing together a quick salad.

This one would also work with other root veg, such as parsnips or celeriac.

2 medium beetroot (about 300–350g), scrubbed well 3 medium carrots (about 300–350g), peeled and cut into quarters lengthways 5–6 tbsp olive oil 1 tsp cumin seeds 100g Puy lentils (or other small green lentils) 2 tbsp freshly squeezed lemon juice, or to taste bag of salad leaves, e.g. rocket or watercress salt and black pepper

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Heat the oven to 190°C/Gas 5. Wrap the beetroot in foil and roast it in the hot oven– this may take an hour or more, depending on their size. When you can easily insert and remove a knife, they are cooked.

About half an hour before the beetroot are cooked, toss the carrots in a roasting tin with 1 tablespoon of the oil, the cumin seeds and some salt and pepper.

Add to the oven and roast for 20–25 minutes, until beginning to caramelise.

Meanwhile, put the lentils into a pan of cold water and bring to the boil. Simmer for about 20 minutes, until tender. Drain and

dress with 1 tablespoon of the olive oil and a little salt while still warm. Mix the lemon juice and 3–4 tablespoons of olive oil with a little salt to make a simple dressing.

Taste and adjust the balance of lemon to oil if necessary.

Allow the beets to cool so you can handle them, then slip off the skins.

Cut into bite-sized chunks and toss with some of the dressing. Dress the salad leaves, scatter over the lentils and top with the carrots and beetroot.

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Brews and Eats

Take the teapot... and reinvent it

For many years teapots have suffered from an image problem. Everyone likes a cuppa at their desk but a pot of tea for one just looks a little... well National Trust. Step forward the T2, a hi-tech plastic contraption which arrived in our office like a swaggering little upstart - claiming to be ‘the ultimate brewing tool’ and unveiling a rainbow of different tea varieties to test.

We decided to put that claim to the test. Carefully following the instructions I loaded the top with Irish Breakfast tea (whatever an Irish Breakfast might be.. something with potatoes possibly?). After a short brewing period I nervously lifted it on top of my mug - half expecting hot water to jet all over my shoes. Not a drip. Simply placing it on top of the mug released a valve allowing the tea to drain into my mug. It works. The tea tasted like tea and no one could accuse me of being uncool. If you suffer from teapot based insecurity, the new T2 is for you. www.t2tea.com T2 is opening a store at Oxford’s Westgate Centre. The Oxford store will house a huge ‘smelling’ table complete with more than 200 varieties and blends of tea from around the world, as well as a tastings bar.

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Brews and Eats

The history of tea

by Ben Fitzgerald The history of tea can be traced back, quite specifically, to the year 2737 BC. According to legend, Chinese emperor Shen Nung was sitting beneath a tree, while his servant boiled some water.

Some leaves from the tree blew into the water and Shen Nung, a keen amateur herbalist, decided to drink the accidental infusion - thus inventing tea.

This story is almost certainly absolute horse shit, and is just as likely to have been invented by those weary looking chips from the PG tips adverts of the 1970s.

However... tea drinking certainly became established in China, along with writing, the printing press and organised firework displays while people in the ‘West’ were still inventing the stick.

Containers for tea have been found in tombs dating from the Han dynasty (206-220AD) but it was under the Tang dynasty that

tea drinkin really took off. Although it was many centuries later that the chocolate digestive came into being. (The story goes that a man was drinking a cup of tea in 1953 AD when a biscuit accidentally became partially submerged in his brew having been dropped from the beak of a passing seagull. He was inspired to invent the chocolate biscuit that very afternoon.)

But we’re getting ahead of ourselves. The tea drinking craze moved to Japan from China when Buddhist monks brought back the idea with them and it soon became a vital part of Japanese culture. Tea first became a thing in Europe when it was brought back to the continent by the Dutch and Portuguese although it remained a preserve of the aristocracy, along with incest and recreational sailing. It was

the marriage of Charles II to Portuguese princess Catherine of Braganza that made the drink fashionable in Britain, with the East India Company capitalising on the growing trend and beginning to import tea from Java in 1664.

Such was the popularity of tea that the British government at the time began to levvy putative taxes on the leaves - as a direct result, tea producers began cutting their product with other products to maintain their profits.

Some producers even took to using dung to make it look more like tea - a tradition that still continues today with ‘Yorkshire Tea’.

Luckily in 1784 Prime Minister William Pitt the Younger decided that enough was enough and slashed the tax from 119 per cent to 12.5 per cent - opening the floodgates for tea to became the drink that made Britain Great (along with the establishment of an oppressive empire).

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Theatre list Wednesday November 1

THEATRE: No Petticoats Here 7:30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot Thursday November 2 THEATRE: Dirty Dusting 7:30pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

THEATRE: Western Players 7:30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Rd

7:30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Rd

Friday November 10

THEATRE: Russian State Ballet

COMEDY: That’ll be the day 7:30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon THEATRE: The Secret Keeper 7:45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

7:30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

Tues November 21 to Wed November 22

Thursday November 23

THEATRE: Kennet Opera’s The Marriage of Figaro Times vary - Arlington Arts, Newbury

Saturday November 11

COMEDY: Ed Byrne 8:00pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Friday November 24

THEATRE: Western Players 7:30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Rd

THEATRE: Jack and the Beanstalk 7:00pm - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford

Friday November 3 COMEDY/THEATRE: Austentatious 7:30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Rd

Sunday November 12

COMEDY: Jethro 7:30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

Tues November 14 to Wed November 15

THEATRE: Churchill 7:30pm - Trowbrige Town Hall THEATRE: What Once Was Ours 7:30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

Saturday November 4

7:30pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

THEATRE: Joan 7:30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

Saturday November 25

Sunday November 5

COMEDY: Stephen K Amos 8:00pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Friday November 17

THEATRE: The Curious Adventures of Pinocchio 3:00pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury

COMEDY: Jason Byrne 8:00pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Saturday November 18

THEATRE: Ruby Confue 8:00pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Rd

Monday November 6

THEATRE: Bobbi’s Academy of Dance 6:30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

THEATRE: Mrs Gerrish’s Rear Window 3:00pm - Trowbridge Town Hall

COMEDY: The Thinking Drinkers 8:00pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury

Tuesday November 28

Thurs November 2 to Sat November 4

MUSIC: Collabro 7:30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Tuesday November 7

MUSIC: The Sensational 60’s Experience 7:30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon THEATRE: Finding Joy

MUSIC/THEATRE: Elaine Paige 7:30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon THEATRE: Rum in the Gravy Boat 8:00pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury

Sat November 18 to Sun November 19

Tues November 7 to Wed November 8

THEATRE: Kentwood Cracker 6:00pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon COMEDY: Henning When 7:30pm - Salisbury City Hall

THEATRE: Shakespheare Schools Festival 7:00pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury Wednesday November 8 THEATRE: The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Hyde 7:30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

THEATRE: Tanwood Youth Theatre Times vary - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Sunday November 19

Tuesday November 21 COMEDY: Daniel Sloss

COMEDY: Jongleurs 8:00pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Rd THEATRE: What Once Was Ours 7:30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

Sunday November 26

THEATRE: WNO - Eugene Onegin 7:00pm - New Theatre, Oxford Wednesday November 29 THEATRE: WNO - From the House of the Dead 7:00pm - New Theatre, Oxford Thursday November 30 THEATRE: A Spooky Christmas 7:00pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Rd THEATRE: WNO - Eugene Onegin 7:00pm - New Theatre, Oxford

Drinking connoisseurs come to Newbury

After a successful Edinburgh Fringe run, The Thinking Drinkers bring their History of Alcohol show to Arlington Arts Centre on November 18.

Enjoy five free drinks as these award-winning professional drink experts definitively prove that alcohol has influenced everything that has ever happened. Ever. Their brand new show is an intoxicating, hilarious time-travelling journey through our drink-drenched past, pouring the entire history of human civilisation into a shot glass.

Ben McFarland is the author of World’s Best Beers: 1000 Unmissable Brews from Portland to www.theocelot.co.uk 32 Ocelot 137.indd 32

Prague and Boutique Beer: 500 of the World’s Finest Craft Brews. He is the triple-crowned winner of British Beer Writer of the Year – the first time as the youngest ever recipient.

Tom Sandham is former editor of leading industry spirits and cocktail magazine CLASS and lectures on spirits for the Wine & Spirits Education Trust.

He launched the Top 50 Bars of the World and House Tonic magazine for the Soho House Group, and is also the author of the award-winning World’s Best Cocktails.

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Comedy

No he can’t read my joker face

By Claire Dukes

ABOUT THE BOOK

Stewart Lee has seen a ghost but doesn’t believe in the afterlife. Rob Beckett can peel a banana with his feet. Viv Groskop gave birth to a baby next to a dishwasher.

Question: What do you get when you combine unknown facts about Britain’s best-loved comedians with their favourite one-liners and candid, black-and-white portraits?

Answer: Joker Face, a hilarious record of the British comedy scene from comedian and photographer Steve Best.

This book is a backstage pass into the world of British comedy, featuring intimate, often surprising and very funny portraits of some comedy greats: Jimmy Carr, Sara Pascoe, John Bishop, Alexei Sayle, Mackenzie Crook, Josie Lawrence, Mark Watson, Tommy Tiernan, Phill Jupitus and many, many more – 528 to be precise.

Tony Cowards

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Ed Pownall ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Steve Best has been a stand-up comedian for over 20 years. He has performed all over the world, including in South Africa, Malaysia, Indonesia, Bosnia, Holland, Denmark, The Falkland Islands and Southend-on-Sea. He has been on nationwide tours with Frank Skinner, Craig Charles and Omid Djalili and regularly appears on television. Joker Face is his second book, following the publication of Comedy Snapshot in 2014.

Steve Best

“Over 450 comedians share their best one-liners”

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In association with The Ocelot The Victoria and Ocelot present: Davey Malone

By Claire Dukes

Formally a band memeber of Davey Malone and the Longtails, the folky punkish guitarist will be heading to The Victoria on his first solo tour November 30.

Malone has a wonderful apt for re-working classics as well as inducing quirky and original tales throughout his sets - his former band’s Bargirl predominatly sticks out in my mind, “we’ve all done it”. Adding to his impressive resume is also Hobo Jones and The Junkyard Dogs.

Alongside his whimsical real life tales Davey also combines wit, charm and cheek through his often blunt lyrics.

I’m curious if Davey rehearses his opening lines when speaking to the audience, it’s a mystery.

Regardless he always manages to present an natural freshness to his shows which undoubtedly explains how he attracks the attention of his audience. Unsurprisingly Davey gets the crowd singing along and, at times, in complete hysterics.

To give you more of a vibe, The Good Gig Guide rates Davey as: “A folk-punk phenomenon,

a dark and dodgy dealer in high tragedy, comedy and sparkling morality. He’ll have you laughing, weeping and thinking things you won’t want to mention in polite company.“ Accompanying Davey Malone for our favourite night at The Vic, Night of the Ocelot, will also be Steve Mitchell formally of The Leylines.

The Leylines established themselves quickly as festival favourites around the likes of Glastonbury, The Big Festival, Beautiful Days and Goldcoast Oceanfest.

Steve’s sound is actually not too disimiliar to R.E.M.’s Michael Stipe, which he harmonically delivers through stories of life on the road with particular attention to societal issues.

The night kicks off at 8.30pm, and tickets are only £5 which can be purchased online or on the door.

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Paloma Faith

B

ecoming a parent is just about the biggest event in anyone’s lives, bringing with it a raft of challenges and unforeseen scenarios that potentially pose the sternest of tests.

For Paloma Faith, the experience of being a new mum may have left her wondering where her next night’s sleep might be coming from, yet it’s brought a renewed sense of purpose and focus to her music.

“I’m trying to juggle being a mother and a singer. I have no idea how I am managing, but I am somehow,” she laughs, recounting her whirlwind existence recording her fourth studio album.

The 36-year old Londoner has already amassed an enviable career over the past decade that has seen her chalk up three double platinum recordings to her name.

While it’s been a road requiring plenty of hard graft, her artfully soulful sound and quirky style have undoubtedly played their part in propelling her to success.

The singer’s latest offering,

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The Architect, follows boldly in its predecessors’ footsteps, showcasing her distinctive powerful vocals.

It seems the singer is enjoying a comparatively settled phase of her life living with French boyfriend Leyman Lahcine, and it’s apparent that starting a family has directly influenced her music.

“I do feel my approach to music has changed since I’ve become a parent - which does have an impact. With difficult things that are happening in the world, you feel protective and want to make things comfortable for your family.

“Growing up in Hackney, I was surrounded by lots of different types of music - from my mum, I remember listening to plenty of revolutionary music from the 60s such as Bob Dylan, while my dad was really into jazz, which is where my interest in all that comes from.

“Later, when I was studying, I got into R and B dancehall as well, and originally I wanted to be dancer. Then I did my musical theatre, and I think that music just chose me,” she said.

From her early CV that spanned everything from being a life model, cabaret dancer and bartender, to a gig as a magician’s assistant, her rich experiences have offered plenty of tales and adventures to fuel her inventive songwriting.

Do You Want The Truth or Something Beautiful? blazed a trail into the top 10, and

proceeded charts for t But how do it now?

“Well, th years ago, was. But I th managed t unfortunate get to make two albums

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Paloma Faith

proceeded to lodge in the album charts for the next 100 weeks.

But how does she look back on it now?

“Well, that was nearly 10 years ago, and it was what it was. But I think it is great that I’ve managed to sustain a career as unfortunately not many people get to make more than one or two albums these days,” reflects

the singer on what she feels is now an over-saturated market.

By her own admission, trying to sustain a fanbase and avoiding the trap of merely recreating a formula for previous hits has offered plenty of challenges.

But she is not one to rest on her laurels, and ‘likes to mix things up a bit’ which is certainly the case with her latest material.

Paloma’s down-to-earth manner is a breath of fresh air in an industry awash with egos, and her willingness to give something back was seen with her time on The Voice series. Beyond being a vocal mentor, she was determined to help those under her wing with additional songwriting classes.

As for her own career, having been nominated several times for a Brit Award, persistence paid off two years ago as she claimed a long-awaited win in the best female solo artist category. Being in an industry that is often quick to cast judgment, she felt there was a real sense of vindication in claiming the coveted accolade.

“It was amazing to win the Brit Award and to finally gain some acknowledgement. I come from a long line of people that haven’t

really been acknowledged for what they did. I think there are a lot of people out there doing important work, like doctors and nurses who don’t get that recognition they should.”

With a major award to her name, there has been plenty of hype surrounding her latest release, bolstered by notable additions including an appearance from Samuel L Jackson and a duet with singer songwriter John Legend in the mix.

Besides the album, fans will have to wait a little longer for her next UK tour, which kicks off next March. It’s destined to feature some of Paloma’s trademark selfdesigned sets to spark the tone for a hit-packed series of shows.

“The only reason I do what I’m doing is because I love touring – as when I’m out there I am excited and feel that I’m in the right place,” adds the engaging singer, who may well have a little more to think about with a young child in tow, yet it won’t stop her from enjoying every single moment.

Paloma will release her new album - The Architect on November 17.

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23/10/2017 18:30

Buswell Bradley Cowtan

Swindon’s maverick musician returns home with live album launch To celebrate the release of the new studio album Stitched Shoes & an Irish Wristwatch through Secret Chord Records on December 1, maverick musician Buswell is holding a launch gig in his hometown of Swindon.

Just before the release of the album Buswell will be launching Stitched Shoes & an Irish Wristwatch live at Swindon Arts Centre November 29.

Typically for a Buswell project however, this is not going to be your average album launch event. After all, Shaun is the man who created the 68 piece 12.12.12 Underground Orchestra from strangers he met on the London,Underground, formed a 24 piece orchestra at the Edinburgh Fringe of 2014, and formed the Pilton Pop-Up Orchestra at Glastonbury 2015.

He also toured the country in 2015 and 2016 with partner in crime Erik Nyberg creating pop-up orchestras from sustainable, locally sourced musicians and earlier this year formed a 27 piece orchestra from

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strangers they met in Paris, writing and recording an album of 12 songs in 6 hours.

So, never one to make it easy for himself, for this outing Shaun has set himself a new challenge – to perform the new album live, in its entirety, recreating it using EVERY instrument recorded. That’s around 20 musicians performing a total of 144 individual parts in 45 minutes. If he misses one instrument, he fails the challenge. The consequences of that are yet to be calculated.

To make things harder, whilst the performance will involve some of the core group of musicians who performed on the album, due to the multiple layers and the fact the recordings were made over a number of years much of the orchestra will have to be formed from local musicians, sourced in the run up to the event…

Support for the show comesfrom very special guests Charlie Bath and Sun & The Rain Men. For tickets visit swindontheatres.co.uk

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Gig Monkey Gig Monkey, AKA Ed Dyer, takes a rummage through the best music released by local artists. If you like the sound of something please check it out. Send your reviews to ed@secretchordrecords.com

Rewire the Time Machine – Rewire the Time Machine (LP) To say this has been eagerly anticipated is the annual understatement winner of the last few years.

A handful of incendiary live shows and a couple of teased promo videos is all we have had from this outfit so far. However, it has been more than enough to whet the appetite for this debut album release for a band rising from the ashes of well-regarded group SoAmI and that features on drums no lesser a musician than Lee Moulding, son of XTC’s Colin.

Pedigree indeed.

The wait has certainly been worth it, as the four-piece have produced what I feel will certainly prove to be one of the stand out releases of the year – and not just locally.

Drawing influence from a myriad of rock-based sources, this is sure to tick boxes with fans of alt-rock in general, but especially if the big, riff driven output of the likes of Stoner / Desert Rock titans Kyuss and QOTSA, Clutch, Monster Magnet or Paw is your thing.

It is the monstrous riffage and pounding rhythms that grabs you by the proverbial balls at first, but with vocal melodies that Dave G and his merry band of Foo Fighters would be happy to unleash upon the world there is further wizardry at work that makes this instantly accessible and immediately sing-along-able.

There is not a weak moment here, and it is hard to pick a standout moment too, it is all of such a high standard, although I do have a soft spot for live favourite Money to Burn and its serious ability to get your head nodding and fist pumping.

Production is equally big – you

Rewire the Time Machine - a fine pedigree

feel like you are stood in the middle of the band at times. It is well judged - full, lush but not over complicated.

Buswell – Stitched Shoes & An Irish Wristwatch (LP) Buswell is a fluid collective of musicians who gather round the creative axis that is Shaun Buswell, an auteur in the truest sense, and a man given to asking as many questions as he answers within his various musical ventures (mainly altruistic challenges involving creating orchestras from strangers to play his music at places like Glastonbury Festival and the Edinburgh Fringe). If you have followed Buswell’s adventures of the last 10 years or so as this record was developed, it will be everything you wanted it to be – epic in scope and sound, but underneath the orchestral ‘sturm und drang’, possessed of a heart and soul straight from the best that modern folk has to offer. For at the core of this album is a collection of songs that have a character all of their own, commentaries on life, love and the world about us as Shaun equally tries to understand and guide the listener around the world. Musically this album

is vast – the simple seeming folk-pop songs augmented with layer upon layer of real orchestration, not synths. Lush sweeping strings, punchy brass and emotive woodwind surround the core guitar, percussion and piano that are the songs foundations, building them up into epic, grand journeys that push and pull at your emotions. It is here, when you start considering the vast number of instruments and musicians involved that you understand that this album is as much about them as it is Buswell himself. The people are the true heart and soul of the record, even the cover is given over to polaroid style pictures of everyone involved in the making of the piece. Buswell understands the value of musical talent, and how a project as complex as this is only as good as the component parts, the team involved.

So, Stitched Shoes & An Irish Wristwatch (try saying that quickly) is something very rare indeed. It is not often you are privileged to hear such an accomplished piece of music. This gem of a folk-pop record blended with such lavish cinematic pretentions is stunning indeed.

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Ritual Union

Pinkshinyultrablast

Ritual Union Festival

By Claire Dukes

THE PLACES: O2 Academy, The Bullingdon, The Library and Truckstore In a nutshell, essentially Oxford’s Ritual Union Festival is a day jam-packed with incredible music. Some artists you may know, and others you just happen to stumble upon.

Given the 5 minute radius between the venues, it’s kind of like an organised bar crawl.

With a complimentary mini map and itinerary, you’re able to dart in and out of some of Oxford’s most renowed music venues along Cowley Road.

The Library was my personal favourite, mainly because it’s incredibly characteristic with or

without music and completely utilises its own space. I liked squeezing into the basement where the line between the band and audience was ambiguous, and arguably not even there. This also accentuated the sound quality which if done half arsed is lost in bigger venues.

If you’re not from Oxford, Ritual Union is a day really worth investing in. If you’re into music it acts like a kind of taster session for what the City has to offer from its edgy East corner.

THE PEOPLE: Low Island, Pinkshinyultrablast and Van Zeller You know you’re not into a band when you have time to wonder off into a day dream.

On Saturday I found 3 that completely captivated me.

You can be left quite disheartened after over-hyping yourself for a band and the performace isn’t all that.

Low Island completely disproved this theory. Their medlodic sound, trancey vibe

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and mystical vocals were all on point. Low Island are now one of my new favourite things.

Pinkshinyultrablast is a toast to modern Russia. A little hint of Alice Glass mixed with a sombre and almost Icelandic quality. Simpley tantalising.

Van Zellar took me in a sharp change of direction.

The Brisol based post-punk

Image @LowIsland

Image @vanzellerband

band were the most enigmatic performace I’d seen for a while. High energy, astounding vocals and no fucks given, these guys are regenerating the garage rock scene.

Hallelujah!

On Saturday I’d basically just been to a festival which allowed me to spy on some of the most upcoming artists of 2017.

See you next time.

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The Twang

The Twang come to the O2

Do you remember the heady days of 10 years ago?

The Ocelot was only a year old.

The recession hadn’t hit yet. And Brexit and Donald Trump were unimaginable.

2007 was also the year that The Twang’s debut album came out.

Back then The Twang WAS the ‘Best New Band in Britain’ (NME).

Every A&R man in the country were hot footing it up the M40 to Birmingham to snare the signatures of this band, and shows across the UK were selling out in record time.

A growing army of fans voted with their feet and added to the feeling that we are witnessing one of those rare moments in music.

With Time Out declaring that the band were ‘set to own 2007’ and

The Sun identifying them as ‘one of 2007’s rising stars’, they were the only band to have their demo played on daytime Radio 1 prior to signing a deal with Jo Whiley joining in with the moment by declaring: ‘If you like this… (snippet of The Stone Roses) and this… (snippet of Happy Mondays) and this… (snippet of The Charlatans), then you’re going to love this!’

Little wonder that The Twang were already in the award-winning business, picking up NME’s Philip Hall Radar Award (1 March 2007) for Best Newcomers as their debut single, ‘Wide Awake’, crashed into the UK Top 20.

At the heart of it all, in the modest Magic Garden studios in Wolverhampton, The Twang were

recording their debut album, a record that set them apart from the chasing pack and made 2007 their year. With a June 4 2007 release on B-Unique, Love It When I Feel Like This, brought together the best of their work, eschewing the big studios to keep it real.

And now fast forward ten years and you can get a taste of those heady days of 2007 as The Twang go on tour playing the entire record, in full, from start to finish, for the very first time.

Sounds bloody good if you ask us.

Like a time machine but easier.

They boys will be coming to the O2 Academy in Oxford on Friday December 8 and you can pick up tickets by visiting www.02academyoxford.co.uk

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Music News Newton Faulkner unveils a new direction Appearing at Oxford’s O2 on November 18 2017, singer-songwriter Newton Faulkner once tagged ‘the British Jack Johnson’ has revamped his former image.

These days, Newton Faulkner is a different proposition, and his

audacious new album, Human Love, is a colorful statement of intent. a maelstrom of rhythm and harmony.

Embracing racing drums, African percussion, chanted choruses, ambient interludes and the most imposing hooks of his career to date.

Emotional Braggage

Billy Bragg is set to visit the O2 Academy in Oxford as part of his new Bridges Not Walls tour.

He will perform songs from his career which spans more than 30 years, with some pertinent covers by his heroes and mentors and

some freshly minted songs about the state of the world.

Fresh from touring the world with Joe Henry and galvanised by ‘events’, not least the worrying rise of popularism, Billy is dealing with it in the best way he knows

how, by strapping on his electric guitar and heading out on a new tour. “Music can’t change the world, but it does have the power to bring people together. In such divisive times, it seems a good place to start,” says Billy.

Coming to the Victoria pub in Swindon on Thursday November 2, are Daventry glam punk rockers Dead Frequency.

The band have built a dedicated following by gigging and touring non-stop all across the UK over the last four years. Since the formation of their current line up in May 2013, Dead Frequency

(singer and guitarist Matti Fantasi, bassist James Bourne and drummer Sam Thorne) have shared stages with rock royalty such as Andrew WK, Stiff Little Fingers and some of the rising stars of the British scene such as Creeper.

The brand new E.P. Tough Tracks And Setbacks is out now.

Also appearing on the night are Rebel Station - a new Punk Rock band playing their original tunes, the old school way.

Formed October 2014, in Gloucester with members drawn from Punk outfits First Wave and The Small Things, the band’s music is a mix of old school punk and solid British rock.

Strap in for a glam and punk invasion

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Music News A place to see emerging new talent Showcasing the The Corn Exchange in Newbury lively mixture of pop punk, classic will be showcasing some of the American rock and rock ‘n’ roll! best new tunes best local rock music on Saturday November 4.

This autumn showcase will be a

Tickes cost £5 advance or £8 on the door. Doors open at 7.30pm

Urban jazz singer Ruby Confue will be taking to the stage at Swindon’s Arts Centre on Saturday November 25.

Originally from Swindon, now based in London Ruby’s music combines jazz with elements of hip hop, spoken word, R&B, funk and soul.

Her first single Baby 126 was released in association with Swindon based production team Ligherthief Music, run by Stu

Rowe.

Supporting Ruby at the Arts Centre will be George Wilding, a singer/guitarist from Avebury.

His first single My Backwards Head was regularly played on Radio 2 and he is currently promoting his latest EP Lunatic.

Both artists will be accompanied by Stu and the Lighterthief house band www.swindontheatres.co.uk/ online

Ruby’s set to sparkle

Oxford’s recently refurbished Jerico Tavern has launched a new monthly showcase of great new music on the last Thursday of the month.

The regular nights are a collaboration between Oxford’s Daisy Rodgers Music (www. facebook.com/daisyrodgersmusic) and Reading’s Heavy Pop Promotions (www.facebook. com/heavypoppromo). Dave from Heavy Pop has taken over the bookings for the Jericho and has some interesting plans to re-instate the Jericho at the heart of the Oxford music scene.

Bands interested in playing should contact www.facebook.com/ daisyrodgersmusic Tickets will be £5 adv and £6 on the door. The first show is 30 November featuring Kone, Autumn Saints and Freemantle.

Cellar bar is spared Oxford’s independent grassroots music and arts venue, The Cellar Bar, has been saved from closure after landlords, St Michael’s & All Saint’s Charities withdrew their application to redevelop the site.

Plans submitted in September, to redevelop the site into a retail space prompted widespread opposition from supporters.

A relaxing evening out with Cradle of Filth?

Don’t miss the legendary extreme metal heroes Cradle of Filth, as they support their brand-new album, Cryptoriana - The Seductiveness Of Decay.

They will be cranking it up at Oxford’s O2 Academy on Tuesday November 7 at 7pm. www.academymusicgroup.com/ o2academyoxford/

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Gig list

Wednesday November 1 Matthew E.White 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

Rorke’s Drift 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Get Carter 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon

The Killertones 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Ragged Union 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon Saturday November 11

District 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Tundra 9pm - Woodlands Edge, Swindon Black Rose 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon

Thursday November 2 Eddie Martin Band 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Sunday November 5 Elvis 6.30pm - The Castle Inn, Swindon

Plugged-in Singers Night 8pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham

Intervals 7pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford

The De-Rellas + Charred Hearts 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Dead Frequency + Rebel Station 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon

The Mike Hoddinott Blues All-Stars 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford On Avon

El Toro 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough

Rock Bottoms Open Mic 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

Iration Steppas Sound System Sunday Session 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Friday November 3 Ruffneck UK 7pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Hairforce 5 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Monday November 6

Too Many T’s 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

CC Smugglers 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Newbury Unplugged (open mic) 7.30pm - ACE Space, Newbury

Bury Tomorrow 7pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford

ChaRivari / Charlton Lane / Evil Owl 8pm Three Horseshoes, Bradford On Avon Guns N Roses Experience 8pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Tuesday November 7

Stone Foundation 7.45pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Wacky Wednesday 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Whitesnake UK 8pm - Level III, Swindon Locarno Beat 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon Rorkes Drift 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon Whitesnake UK 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Simple Ft Levon Vincent 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Saturday November 4 Autobahn 6pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford The Listening Room 7.30pm - Old Fire Station, Oxford Broken Silence 9pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford On Avon Sparky’s Spontaneous Showcase 8pm - The White House, Oxford Blackmax & The Pirates 8.30pm - The Lamb Innm Marlborough Danny & The Randoms 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon No Middle Ground

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Akon with Konvict Kartel 7pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford

Cradle of Filth 7pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Emily Barker Band 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Wednesday November 8 District 10pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Thursday November 9 Wire 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Limehouse Lizzy 7.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Singers Night 8pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham Mike Barham 8.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Friday November 10 Billy Brag 6.30pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Brian Gittins 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Friday Night Live 7pm - The Mad Hatter, Oxford The Blunders 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford On Avon Blind Lemon Blues Band

Viper – The Sound of Drum and Bass 6.30pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Diatonics with caller Emma Wooders 7.30pm - Kennington Village Centre, Oxford Pussycat and the Dirty Johnsons 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford On Avon

No Middle Ground 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon Pistol Slapper Blues 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon Syntronix 9pm - Woodlands Edge, Swindon Texas Ghost Train 9pm - The Brewery Tap, Abingdon-on-Thames Metallica Reloaded 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Crucast 11pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Tropicle Popsicle 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Sunday November 12 Metal Gods 7pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Toseland 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Strange Folk 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Monday November 13 All Welcome Night 8pm - The Lamb Inn, Devizes Tuesday November 14 Nelly 7pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Jim Crawford 8pm - The Swan Hotel, Bradford on Avon Wednesday November 15 Big Gilson & Blues Dynamite 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Awakening Savannah + Special Guests 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon

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Gig List

District 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Zing 9pm - Woodlands Edge, Swindon

Mercy Lounge 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

Thursday November 16

Musical Medicane Ft Medlar 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

The Jaywalkers + Saskia 8pm - ACE Space, Newbury

Sunday November 19

Bellevue Days + Support 8.30pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury

John Smith + Will Stratton + Martha Bailey 7pm - St Barnabas Church, Oxford The Stray Birds 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Cockney Rejects + The Menstral Cramps 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Friday November 17 Antarctic Monkeys 6.30pm - O2 Academy, Oxford

Airbourne 7pm - O2 Academy, Oxford Phil Cooper and the Slight Band 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Monday November 20

In It For The Money 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough

All Welcome Night 8pm - The Lamb Inn, Devizes

Chaos Bros 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon

Wednesday November 22

Alan Clayson and the Argonauts 7.30pm - The Beehive, Swindon

Amusement Parks on Fire 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Bon Giovi 8pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

District 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Deaf Horse 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

Thursday November 23

Slackrr + Support 8.30pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury Audio Asylum 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon Bull Town Boys 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon The Mighty Cadillacs 9pm - The Old Anchor, Abingdon-on-Thames Worried About Mike 9pm - The Mermaid, Burford Forever Sabbath 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Karupt FM – The Lost Tape Tour 10pm - O2 Academy, Oxford Bossaphonik Presents Bukky Les & Black Egypt 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Saturday November 18 Newton Faulkner 6.30pm - O2 Academy, Oxford Edsel Furys 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Ghouls + Electric Shakes + Palooka 5 8.30pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury Killertones 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough Barrelhouse 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon Edgar and The Ravens 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon

Champagne Charlie 8.30pm - The Castle Inn, Swindon

Mad Dog Mcrea 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Worry Dolls 7.30pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Friday November 24 Dr John Cooper Clarke 6.30pm - O2 Academy, Oxford

Fud 9pm - The Brewery Tap, Abingdon-on-Thames Humdinger 9pm - Woodlands Edge, Swindon Just Floyd 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon Wizards of Oz 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon Wrong Jovi 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Volume #6 Feat T.C and Carasel 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Sunday November 26

Glasville 6.30pm - O2 Academy, Oxford

Monthly Blues Jam 3pm to 7pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Son of Man 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

The Lewis Craven Band 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

The Loan Sharks 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Bus Station Loonies + Support 8.30pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury Faux Fighters – Foo Fighters Tribute Band 8.30pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Runaway Boys 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon Steamroller 9pm - The Old Anchor, Abingdon-on-Thames Stop Stop + Special Guests 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon Vice Versa 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon

Monday November 27 Pumarosa 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Lau 8pm - Marlborough Town Hall Tuesday November 28 Johns & Nowak 8pm - The Swan Hotel, Bradford on Avon Wednesday November 29 Tom Russell 8.30pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford District 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Thursday November 30

Worried About Mike 9pm - Woodlands Edge, Swindon

Scouting for Girls 7pm - O2 Academy, Oxford

Corsairs 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon

Big Al 8.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon

Saturday November 25

Night of the Ocelot 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Indie Disco 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Freefall 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Saedly Dorus & The Hoodie Band 6.30pm - O2 Academy, Oxford

Shepherds Pie 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Dub Pistols 7.30pm - Level III, Swindon

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Agony Girl Four year old Amy is loving school but is getting quite tired after a long a day but she still finds time to do Agony Girl. We ask her the questions and these are her answers.... honest!

Dear Amy, Every year people seem to go a bit weird around the 5th of November and start letting off loads of explosives into the sky in the form of fireworks. It’s a bit annoying. How can I stop them doing it?

Some Guy, Under parliament Turn off the blaster. It will turn off it. I like fireworks because I do.

Dear Amy, My girlfriend has just told me that she is leaving me for another man. She says it’s because I smell. How can I get her to change her mind?

Gavin, Swindon Get your belly so it’s not fat and keep not farting.

Dear Amy, What are you doing today?

Stacey, Didcot Going to a party because I am. If I get to eat food there and play and dance it will be good.

Dear Amy, What’s your favourite game and how do you play it?

Aphrodite, Slough It’s called Lego. You pick a person and then you build some stuff like houses and then play and build some other stuff as well.

Dear Amy, If you could have any animal in the world as a pet what would you have and what would you name it?

Quentin, Salisbury I would have a cat and I would name it Kicky.

Dear Amy, Why are we here?

Dan, Marlborough I don’t want to be here and I want to be there. We’re here because we live here and mummy is going to move in a while.

Dear Amy, Help I’ve fallen down the stairs and think I’ve broken something. Can you help me?

Tracey, Walcot Put the bone back together and then you go to hospital.

They will make you lie down for a bit.

Dear Amy, A meteorite is heading for earth and it will wipe all human existence from the planet. What should we do?

Donald, Washington You need to stop it and take care of it and keep children safe.

Write into Amy at editorial@theocelot.co.uk

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