Ocelot 141 march 2018 final artwork

No: 141 March 2018

Wiltshire, Oxfordshire and West Berkshire

Free

“I’m in a wide open space” Paul Draper talks about life after Mansun p38

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Photo by Tom Sheehan

/ STYLE / EATS / BREWS / SCREEN / TECH 19/02/2018 18:52

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#141 For Starters

MARCH ISSUE

04 The Rant + Luke Coleman 06 Encyclopaedia Oceloticca 08 The Bassett Rivers Echo Lifestyle

10 Get Away 12 Get A Life 14 Style 17 Tech 18 TV 20 Film Brews and Eats

21 Wine not?

22 Brewery Bird 23 Arbequina 24 TOAD 26 Recipe 27 History of Carrots Arts and Culture

29 The Theatre Guide 31 Follow The Crows 32 Phil Jupitus 34 Swinge Music

37 Gig Monkey 38 Paul Draper 40 Black Sheep Apprentice 41 Mandolin Orange 42 Music News 44 Gig List The Final Bit of the magazine

46 Agony Girl

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The year marches on...

Another month, another full to the brim magazine.

We’ve got so much packed into this magazine that Elon Musk (who we write about on page six) would find it too heavy to send into space in a Tesla.

There’s Bassett Rivers. Where you find that there’s nothing worse than a cat who is forced to eat nothing but vegetables and that Derek faces extinction.

We then look at some of the lovely places you can visit in Wiltshire. There’s some good stuff on our own doorstep and sometimes it’s good to wake up and smell the roses (or snowdrops in the case of Lacock).

In tech we look into the scary world of facial recognition glasses. Big Brother is watching you. But he’s pretty obvious to spot as he’s wearing big glasses.

I wax lyrical about my new favourite show Altered Carbon, Brewery Bird makes a few things clear for us, we get a bit tipsy at TOAD and we also look into the history of carrots. Interesting stuff.

There’s also a big interview with a big star in the form of Phil Jupitus. We have a rundown of what to expect at this year’s Swinge festival.

In the music section we talk to Paul Draper from Mansun and look at Black Sheep Apprentice - one of the best bands in Swindon.

And finally there’s our very own Agony Girl Write in to me at jamie@theocelot.co.uk

Jamie Hill Editor: Jamie Hill - jamie@theocelot.co.uk Deputy: Ben Fitzgerald - ben@theocelot.co.uk Reporter: Claire Dukes - claire@theocelot.co.uk Sales: Dave Stewart dave@theocelot.co.uk - 07872 176999 Rosy Presley rosy@positivemediagroup. press - 07717 501790 Nataley Fryer nataley@positivemedia group.press - 07769 978823 Telephone: 01793 781986 Publisher: Positive Media Group, Unit 3, Arclite House, Peatmoor, Swindon SN5 5YN Printers: Stones, Banbury 19/02/2018 18:52

For Starters

It’s political correctness gone mad!

By Jamie Hill IT’S POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GONE MAD! I TELL YOU! Have you heard the latest? You can’t even denigrate women and treat them like a lower species rather than a pleasure vessel for middle-aged men to ogle at any more!

Benny Hill would be turning in his grave.

IT’S POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GONE MAD! And what’s this? You can’t even pat a waitress’s bum and make off-colour remarks about her breasts without the PC Brigade telling you off.

IT’S POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GONE MAD! Have you heard the latest? According to the latest snowflake lefties on the PC brigade you can’t even buy Robinson’s Marmalade with their old logo of a favourite childhood toy without being clipped around the ear for being a bit racist. What are they going to do next? Make it so we can’t tell English, Irishman and Scotsman jokes as it promotes negative stereotypes? It’s all going too far.

Whatever next?!?! They’ll say we can’t celebrate Christmas next and make all our bananas not bendy.

IT’S POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GONE MAD! And you wouldn’t believe what I just heard. You can’t even march down the street draped in a St George’s cross with the intention of burning down a mosque without being stopped by liberal policeman. This country’s going to the dogs.

IT’S POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GONE MAD! What’s this? Two men can adopt a baby and be raised

by two gay dads and no-one bats an eyelid. What a carry on! I blame Gok Wan. IT’S POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GONE MAD! I went into the hospital the other day and it was like the bloody league of nations. What’s this? We don’t have enough trained staff ourselves? Well I’ve got one thing to say about that.

IT’S POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GONE MAD! And another thing. If I was to round up all of these gays and women and immigrants and send them to a special camp people would claim that I was the bad guy. That’s everything that’s wrong with this society right there.

I feel it doesn’t have a place for me any more and that’s the real problem. I feel alone and scared and left behind.

Please someone help me. Don’t forget me.

IT’S POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GONE MAD.

A doozey for Dooley in Mosul, Iraq Off The Grid with Luke Coleman Our man in Iraq I was all set to torch this column this month, farting sparks of blistering anger as I am. However, it’s all shouting into voids, isn’t it?

No matter that Stacey Dooley has trivialised the rape and murder of thousands of women with her selfimportant, ethically bankrupt take on the suffering of the Yazidi community at the hands of ISIS. Some people will have seen it, and regurgitated adjectives ‘brave’, ‘inspiring’ and ‘sad’, because they haven’t seen the story before. Others will commend Dooley for getting that story to an audience otherwise not engaged.

Still more will marvel at her horror at seeing dead bodies on the streets of Mosul.

Fewer will question why she felt

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the need to take a survivor back to the scene of where she was raped hundreds of times. Why does Dooley claim that her subject will be asking the questions of the ISIS captive, before jumping in? Jumping in with a sensationalist, leering “tell me how many people you raped, killed?”, before leaving with the parting shot “You don’t scare me.” Of course he fucking doesn’t Stacey, he’s a detainee, who you’re interviewing while he sees an armed guard over your shoulder – he’s not going to hurt you, but he’s sure as shit going to give the answers the guards told him to give, if he doesn’t want a kicking back in his cell. There are standards to be upheld in journalism, and the BBC is rightly expected to uphold the highest of them.

If survivors want to confront their

abusers – and that ‘if’ is doing the heaviest of lifting – the meeting should be mediated by trained therapists, not a camera, no matter how utterly shit or shiningly brilliant the journalist.

Anyway, I thought I’d … what’s that, ed? Just 300 words, you say?

Oh.

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Science Fact: Elon Musk

Encyclopedia Oceloticca

by Ben Fitzgerald

Elon Musk

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Elon Musk

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An asteroid or a super volcano could destroy us, and we face risks the dinosaurs never saw: an engineered virus, inadvertent creation of a micro black hole, catastrophic global warming or some as-yet-unknown technology could spell the end of us. Humankind evolved over millions of years, but in the last sixty years atomic weaponry created the potential to extinguish ourselves. Sooner or later, we must expand life beyond this green and blue ball—or go extinct.

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Science Fact: Elon Musk

As a child, I remember fantasising about becoming the richest person in the world and thinking about what I would do with all that cash.

I can only imagine that at the time I would have entertained visions of creating a vast undersea base, with an entire room given over to walnut whips.

Jetpacks would probably have featured heavily and I should imagine there would also have been some kind of flying car that could also travel underwater… it would also have been equipped with plenty of missiles. Any vehicle is always improved by the addition of missiles.

Over the years real life has eroded some of these ambitions and whilst I have not given up on my dreams, I have been forced to compromise. Don’t get me wrong - I’m delighted with my terraced house and I’m the proud owner of a clapped out Ford Focus Estate that coughs up a cloud of blue smoke when you turn the ignition key.

Entrepreneur Elon Musk

however represents everything that the six year old me imagined it would be like to be an adult and live in ‘the future’.

And what’s nice is that he’s not let boring old real life get in the way. After making shedloads of cash with software firm Zip2 and online payment company PayPal, Elon decided that he might as well start looking at ways of saving the human race… by helping to establish a human colony on Mars.

Obviously he was initially met with scepticism from potential backers - and it is at that point that lesser mortals would have taken a long hard look at themselves in the mirror and agreed that they were probably going through a mid-life crisis.

Not so Elon, nope, he ploughed on with a raft of incredible innovations - inventing a rocket that is able to land itself back on its launchpad, creating the first privately funded vehicle to put a satellite into Earth orbit and with the SpaceX dragon vehicle the first privately backed

vehicle to transport cargo to the International Space Station.

Most recently, SpaceX successfully launched the Falcon Heavy - the fourth most powerful rocket ever built - to launch a Tesla Roadster into orbit as a dummy payload - complete with a dummy driver and Bowie’s Space Oddity playing on the car stereo.

Perhaps these can be dismissed as publicitcy stunts - but what can be said of Elon Musk is that he has demonstrated that space exploration is possible in an era when government funding has stalled through lack of interest.

He has shown that such projects can be privately funded, commercially viable and safe. He is also responsible for breathing new life into a jaded and risk averse space program; relighting the spirit of exploration and colonisation at a time when the risks of human extinction through natural disaster, human engineered climate change or nucular war - are far greater than ever.

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Bassett

The

Rivers Scary news for scary times...

Echo

Shock as Doctor Who regenerates as a house plant p49

Cat threatens to eat vegan owner’s face after being forced on a vegetable only diet

by Kit Chentable

A CAT has been charged by police for using threatening behaviour after its vegan owner Tarquin Snowflake tried to give it another bloody vegetable.

Tiddles, known by other cats in the neighbourhood as Mflah The Destroyer of Mice, of Radish Avenue, Bassett Rivers was being held by police last night after they received a call of a domestic dispute at the address.

Mr Snowflake said: “I tried to

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feed Tiddles his usual beetroot, hummus and crispy chickpea mince but he just suddenly went feral.

“It’s really hurt my feelings and he looked at me as if he wanted to kill me and started growling.

“It’s my right to be offended by this so I called the police as it was so upsetting.”

Using state of the art equipment hooked up to the cat the police were able to use a translation device to decipher the growling.

Tiddles, who prefers to be known

as Mflah The Destroyer of Mice, said: “What the fuck does this two legs think he is fucking doing?

“I’m a cat. I eat meat preferably with intestines hanging out and warm blood gushing out of my mouth as I chew on the other creature’s still beating heart. If this two legs feeds me one more thing that isn’t meat based I will chew his bloody face off and feed on his brains. Now put me down and let me go and stare out the window for the next five hours.”

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Dereks to be extinct within the next five years Bassett Rivers MP Bane ‘Drive-by’ Bullet’s monthly Column

By Livi Ngroom A CAMPAIGN has been launched to save the ‘Derek’ after it was revealed that the world’s last living Derek could be dead within the next five years.

Derek Aldershot, 97, of Potter’s Field, is expected by doctors to not survive the year meaning that the world population of Dereks will be three.

Numbers of Dereks were once as high as 500 nesting pairs in the lower Midlands. But conservation efforts to save the Derek have not been successful with the introduction of more motorway service stations, their usual habitat, not sufficient to enable more breeding pairs.

The last surviving Derek in the UK now resides in Bassett Rivers, but there is thought to be a 107 year old Derek living in Nepal and another Derek who has made his habitat in Goresville, Ohio in the United States.

Now efforts are being made by environmental Derek

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campaigners to cross a Darren and a Merrick to create a Derek in an effort to save the species.

Campaigner Tessa McDowell said: “It will be a sad day for us all when the last Derek dies out.

“They are majestic creatures but gone are the days when you would see them foraging at your local Somerfields supermarket, going to bingo on a Saturday night or writing a letter of complaint about the use of the word ‘tit’ on Springwatch to Points of View.”

Campaigners have also highlighted some other species that are on the critically endangered list including Ians, Colins, Nigels, and Daphnes.

Miss McDowell added: “We are in sad times where no-one is bothered about the survival of species like Derek so there isn’t that much breeding going on.

“But if we don’t save them now it will only be a matter of time before more common species like Benjamins or Traceys are on the endangered list.”

I iz like well shocked dat dere r all dese peeps sayin dat all us lot in Labour r spiez.

I iz like well flattered as I wuld luv 2 be a spy as long as I got all dose cool gadgetz and got 2 travel da world n go 2 casinoz n say ‘Da name iz ‘Drive-by’ Bullet, Bane ‘Drive-By’ Bullet’ innit’.

Dat wuld be cool but da daily mail which iz run by an actual Bond Villain called Da Dacre iz like sayin’ dat we’re dose borin’ spiez like da onez you find in dat movie Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Rude boy.

I iz still livin’ in a tent in Hyde Park and I tink da ovva day I did get approached as if I wuz a spy as da man spoke in a weird way and looked nervous as he used da word ‘cottagin’ lotz which must ‘av bin da code word or someting.

But I guess I didn’t say da right password back as my response of ‘wut r u saying, blud?’ made ‘im look a bit scared and he scarpered.

Da main man Corbyn showed up at me tent da ovva day wiv hiz homie Stormzy n said dat I shuldn’t worry about da spy ting as dat iz just anti-Labour proper gander bein’ pushed

by Goebbels/Dacre. I looked at ‘im confused until ‘im n Stormzy went away in dere rocket propelled jet packz whilst bein’ chased by Russian hitmen drivin’ dese pimped up carz dat had gunz appear from da headlightz.

I tink da Russianz were after ‘is Facebook password as dey ‘av bin tryin’ to use robotz to make da world a a more chaotic place but Corbyn ‘ad cottoned on.

But he’z no spy as he wuzn’t wearin’ a tuxedo.

I iz like well excited if I culd be a spy. I wuld make P Diddy Ha Ha Hum me main man on da ground az he iz well gud at Call of Duty so I know I wuld be in safe handz if it wuz all to kick off. But me main man Sixpack Shaker wuld be awful az he iz still a noob and iz only good at Fifa when it’z on da easy settingz.

Respect!

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Get Away

Salisbury: a fusion of ancient and modern

Situated in southern England’s rural heartland, medieval Salisbury is the perfect fusion of ancient and modern.

The city lies at the confluence of five rivers and the awe-inspiring sight of the Cathedral with the tallest spire in England is often described as ‘Britain’s best view’.

Voted one of the world’s Top Ten Cities by Lonely Planet, Salisbury is the perfect destination for visitors with its first class arts venues, great shopping, museums, stunning gardens, historic architecture and a huge range of eating options.

The story of the city began 2,500 years ago when an Iron Age hill fort was built at Old Sarum about two miles north of today’s city centre.

The modern city of Salisbury began about the year 1217 when the Bishop decided to move his seat from Old Sarum to land owned by the church south of the hill.

By 1219 Salisbury had a market and an annual fair. Medieval Salisbury was very successful partly because it was on the road from Wilton to Southampton and from London to Exeter. Work on Salisbury Cathedral began in 1220 and continued until 1258. The tower and spire were added in 1334. The Bishop’s Palace was also built in the 13th century.

Don’t Miss Find out more about the attractions in and around Salisbury from the spectacular early English gothic Cathedral and best preserved Magna Carta through to the iconic site of Stonehenge, just nine miles north of the city. Salisbury City Guides offer medieval tours of the

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city. Enjoy walking the medieval streets and soaking up the history and heritage from the 18th century merchant’s dwelling Mompesson House to Arundells, the home of former Prime Minister Sir Edward Heath, and on to The Rifles Berkshire and Wiltshire Museum and Salisbury Museum housing one of Europe’s most extensive collections of Stonehenge and prehistoric artefacts. Stroll along footpaths in the countryside surrounding the city, take a walk along the water meadows with stunning views of the Cathedral or take part in other leisure activities from cycling to golf.

Salisbury has more than its fair share of parks and green spaces where you can relax over a picnic or enjoy a romantic stroll. The Cathedral Close, in particular, is an oasis of peace and tranquillity within its mighty wooden gates and massive stone walls. Arts venues include Salisbury Playhouse, City Hall and Salisbury Arts Centre and at Fisherton Mill visitors can explore a treasure trove of amazing artwork in the largest independent art gallery in the South West.

Annual Events & Entertainment The world-renowned Ageas

Salisbury International Arts Festival takes place at the end of May and beginning of June, with the next festival happening in 2019. The city hosts a free day of celebrations for St George’s Day in April and runs Salisbury Christmas Market in December. Salisbury has been awarded Purple Flag status which is a ‘gold standard’ for visitor safety at night in the city.

Retail Therapy & Good Food Salisbury has a wealth of independent shops which can be found on Milford Street, Winchester Street, Fisherton Street and the High Street plus many other locations around the city.

To eat out you’ll not only find well-known names like Bill’s but many independent restaurants too. Enjoy al fresco dining at some centrally located restaurants including The Old Ale & Coffee House and Ox Row Inn, dine in style with views of Salisbury Cathedral’s spire from the Refectory Restaurant or head across the water meadows to The Old Mill at Harnham.

For more information on Salisbury - www.salisburycitycouncil.gov.uk and www.salisburybid.co.uk

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Get Away What’s on at Lacock Abbey this spring?

At this time of year, the abbey grounds are springing back to life after the sleepy winter season, with lots of colourful flowers beginning to grow.

Working in the grounds and gardens at Lacock, Head Gardener Sue Carter explains that it’s not about

garden makeovers, or instant gardening; it’s about treading a fine line between renewal and preservation.

“Spring is a favourite time of year for our gardeners, everything is changing every minute and you can hardly keep up with it all! Seeing

Conservation in Action at Lacock Abbey It takes a lot of work to take care of the abbey and its collection.

This Spring, staff at Lacock brought this work out from behindthe-scenes for the public ‘TRIBE’ A photographic exhibition This new exhibition, co-curated by artist Lori Vrba, is by a collective of eight American female artists, drawn to

the romantic notion of story-telling, memory, nostalgia, the natural world and family.

‘TRIBE’ is on display at the Fox Talbot Museum in Lacock from

and hearing all the birds and watching buds open and new shoots appear is a real treat here at Lacock. Discover it for yourself, with the wooded grounds, botanic garden, greenhouse and orchard waiting to show you their secrets.”

to see first hand. Find out about which pests the abbey team fought off last year and the different types of brushes used to clean the collection.

This year, our conservation team will

be updating you on their progress through a takeover on our Twitter and Instagram feeds.

Join in the conversations @LacockNT. Weekdays from Monday 12 February – Friday 13 April.

Saturday 3 February to Sunday 20 May and is free with normal admission to the property.

Follow the Fox Talbot Museum on Twitter @ foxtalbotmuseum

Lacock is near Chippenham, SN15 2LG. National Trust members and under 5s go free.

Visit www.nationaltrust.org.uk/lacock or call 01249 730459 for more information.

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Get a Life

By Jamie Hill

Fanning the flames Being a fan is pretty hard work.

Especially in this age of social media where you can yell your fandom to the rooftops and have to appear a bigger fan than everyone else by knowing every minute detail. It’s exhausting.

And if you’re a professional fan, you even get your own type of mini fame amongst the other fans as some type of super-fan.

You gain respect from these others. They respect you as you’re such a fan that you got a massive tattoo of Lemmy on your back or made a life-size Millennium Falcon out of matchsticks in your garden.

You sometimes find yourself angry at the thing that you’re meant to be a fan of as if you would know better than the creators themselves on what’s best for the object of your affections.

Take Star Wars: The Last Jedi for instance. The internet literally

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exploded with incandescent rage from fans on what the writers shouldn’t be doing with their beloved Star Wars.

Princess Leia can’t fly. You could hear being shouted from here to Tattoine (Of course she can, she’s using the ‘force’. It’s magic.

I didn’t hear you complaining when R2D2 could suddenly fly in the prequels despite that being a very useful skill in the later films that the diminutive robot could have used to get himself out of swamps or out of deserts.)

I’m a fan of a few things. I love Batman, Judge Dredd, Star Wars, Marvel, Prince, The National, Hellblazer, Radiohead, Harry Potter, Game of Thrones, Buffy, Red Dwarf, Stephen King and Neil Gaiman. But I’m not a superfan by any stretch. I just love those things.

To be a superfan you have to be a fan of that thing to the exclusion of all else. And it has to

take over your life.

Thus being a fan of someone else’s creative work has to be the dominant force in your life, and has to be part of everything you do.

You see it a lot with sports fans as their moods change as their teams win or lose.

You could say the same about religion but I won’t go down that road as that way lies death threats and vicars giving you the cold shoulder.

But I do respect people who go this whole hog for the objection of their fandom but you kind of get the feeling that they’re missing out, not just on real life, but also on all the other amazing things that are out there.

No, to be a fan, I would not advise monogamy as you have to experience that life is huge and that there’s just so much out there that could also be your bag enriching everything.

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Style

Perfect pastels

By Fashion writer Gina Akers

As the weather is now moving to milder temperatures (gloved fingers crossed) it’s a great time to start adding that colour back into your life,

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your wardrobe, your home, in fact everywhere could do with a bit of brightening up. Pastel tones and light hues provide the perfect

solution without having to go full on bold colour.

Pastels give great flexibility in fashion allowing you to bring out your inner unicorn

but keep your look sophisticated. Use pastels to create a subtle wash of colour, or go stronger but keeping in with the pastel theme.

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Style Harvey Nichols Hip Bottles, £14.99 each

From left, Ted Baker’s Residence Pink Bergamot & Cassis Diffuser, £34.00, RI2K London Eden Tote Bag in Cornflower, £169.00, OXO Good Grips No Spill Ice Cube Tray, £12.00

Shoes, top to bottom Ecco Soft 7 Ladies Warm Grey Casual Shoes, £110.00 Deichmann Graceland Ribbon Lace Trainers, £22.99 Ecco Soft 8 Mens Titanium Casual Shoes, £125.00 Right, top to bottom OXO Good Grips Multi-Unit Measurement Jug 1L, £20.00 Camden Watch Company No.27 Grey & Rose Gold Watch, £108.00 GoldLust London Sky Blue Topaz 18k Gold Wilderness Ring, £37.00

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Tech

China accessorise with high-tech fashion

By Claire Dukes

I get quite paranoid about the whole Big Brother thing, - not the TV programme demonstrating how unprogressive some members of the human race are, although this does terrify me - it’s the idea that someone’s watching you that gets me.

It’s fair to say that most people like to celebrate the new year in style, and Chinese police are trying out a new trend: facial recognition glasses.

My instant reaction was something along the lines of “what the actual fuck!”, but I kinda calmed down after realising there is a bit of method in the madness. The idea behind this new scheme is to monitor travellers and migrants coming into China’s city train stations, like in Zhengzhou.

Donning a Keanu Reeves circa The Matrix look, Chinese police wearing the sunglasses will be able to scan people’s faces which will link in to police databases enabling access to anyone’s personal details: name, address, criminal profile etc.

Despite the minor issues with invading someone’s privacy, throughout the influx of people coming into Zhengzhou police have managed to capture wanted suspects linked to major crimes. So what’s the issue?

As always your average person, like myself, doesn’t really have a say in the matter and there’s the issue of what governments do with the data collected from police (now including disguised everyday wear). Where’s the line? Where’s the consent? Then again this is where laws differ, particularly between the East and the West, as the Chinese state seems to be less of a democracy.

It came to my attention that UK police are now trying out a new ‘stop and scan’ initiative.

Northern bobbies have now been equipped with fingerprint scanners which they can use on a suspect they believe could be affiliated with a crime.

As a generally law abiding citizen this doesn’t rattle my cage too much, it’s more that it parallels New York’s ‘stop and frisk’ regime, - it’s riddled with moral and legal implications, especially with racial profiling. In the UK police are hoping the scanners will make checks more efficient by being able to scan finger prints on the beat, as opposed to back at the station. I get the speed appeal, but meanwhile back in the West privacy issues, which tie in with consent, bring this new initiative into very grey areas.

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TV

Carbon footprint

By Jamie Hill

Sometimes a show comes along that you just have to scream about from the rooftops. Well in this case project a holo image from a rooftop across a futuristic neon landscape whilst getting used to a new ‘skin’.

I’m talking Altered Carbon. A show that has hurtled like a fist into the face of sci-fi conformity.

Bruised and bloodied you sit through this nonstop thrillfest as you get killed repeatedly in a torture construct feeling every death like its your own.

This is high concept sci-fi at its best. You might compare it to the wonder that is Blade Runner but this being a television series makes it just so much more detailed than a movie can ever be.

And what a world that has been created.

Written by Richard K Morgan (as the sci-fi snob that I am I should just mention that I read the books a few years back so when I heard this was coming was pretty damn excited), Altered Carbon is set in a cyberpunk world 300 years in the future.

Society has been transformed by new technology, leading to human bodies being interchangeable

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like ‘skins’ and death no longer being permanent.

This leads to the super-rich being God-like beings living in the clouds high above the impoverished populace below. The main character is Takeshi Kovacs, a supersoldier with special training. His mind was imprisoned for centuries until a wealthy businessman offers him the chance to live again by solving the businessman’s own murder.

It’s pretty amazing stuff. The city feels gritty and dangerous and there’s just so much to get your head around that at times it feels like exploding.

The good thing about the show is that it was released on Netflix with every episode having a seemingly endless budget.

Just recently Netflix has been really going for it with superlative shows like Godless and Ozark on its 2017 roster showing that it is willing to take some real risks when it comes to adult storytelling.

And Altered Carbon is definitely a show that takes some risks and is definitely not for the fainthearted whether its gore or nudity.

I completely binged season one and will definitely be taking another look before it goes to a second season. This is only the first book (and there are three in total) so there’s going to be at least another two seasons. Thank the stars.

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Film

Coming soon: Wes Anderson’s Isle of Dogs

By Claire Dukes

I’m trying to remember the last time I watched a Wes Anderson film and didn’t enjoy it... Such a time does not exist.

What does exist is my ongoing purgatory I find myself in when trying to decide which Anderson film is my favourite - The Royal Tenenbaums? The Life Aquatic?

Darjeeling Limited? But there are worst situations to be in - it’s never a bad time running a projection of Anderson film clips through my mind, overlayed by his always alluring soundtracks.

As an autuer his films always promise stunning set designs his attention to mise-en-scene always pays off, and I don’t think I’m alone in wishing I owned a house designed by the guy.

Dreamy.

Being an auteur can have it’s trepidations as directors can fall into the trap of essentially repeating the same film over and over again. Anderson, does not

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fall into this beige hole. Even with the Anderson elite of actors always reoccuring, his films remain remarkably fresh and compelling - his latest film is no exception.

Isle of Dogs is Anderson’s second take at stop-motion animation, following the success of his visual rendition of Roald Dahl’s Fantastic Mr Fox. Anderson’s particular style in the latter crosses an aestetic combination between Where the Wild Things Are and Waltz with Bashir - it’s stunning, almost like a graphic novel. Set in a dystopian Japan, the fictional city of Megasaki banishes all the dogs to the barren wasteland of Trash Island - we can assume this becomes the Isle of Dogs (but I have been wrong before). Like most of his storylines, when all seems lost a cunning plan is put into play - often resulting in hilariously dry and ‘what could possibly go wrong’ themed antics. Looking

at the trailer Anderson’s cultural compass, as usual, is on point, previewing some Japense pop culture along with other Japanese artistic tropes.

The film’s muttly crew are voiced over by the likes of Bill Murray (obviously), Edward Norton, Tilda Swinton, Jeff Goldblum, and Scarlett Johansson.

Looking back through Anderson’s character style, his ensemble of actors always brings a refined frenetic style to their characters which is contrastingly executed in a subtle manner. The result works in unity with his films’ consistently dry and witty humour.

Having watched the trailer an uncountable amount of times, I could not be more excited to go see Isle of Dogs. Granted getting overly excited about a film can sometimes raise your expectations too high, but Anderson hasn’t let me down yet.

Isle of Dogs is out March 30.

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Brews and Eats What does your choice of tipple say about you?

First date drinks

By Darren Willmott First dates are one of life’s scary moments, surely ranking alongside other horror appointments such as job interviews and driving tests.

Worse still, whilst you’re trying to be all calm and suave, many things you subconsciously do could be giving away all sorts of signals to your date before you’ve even realised what you’ve done.

Whilst you should be able to navigate the obvious pitfalls such as not forgetting the other person’s name, a recent study suggests that what you choose to drink has just as much of an impact as to whether the evening will be a success or not. Nearly half of all respondents suggested that a wrong choice of drink would put them off their date straight away.

Whilst there are a few easy wins when it comes to your order, such as not getting your courage up by kicking things off with a round of shots, or believing that you ‘get better with drink’ and ordering way too much, how do you judge it just right?

Perhaps playing against initial expectations, the study found that

men are actually a touch more picky on the subject of what to drink on a date than women are, with 70% of men making snap judgements compared to just 30% of women.

After shots, which ranked as the most ‘unattractive’ drink you could choose on a first date, the seemingly innocent orders of cider and beer were next up on the no-no list. Potentially because a chap ordering a pint may be seen as too laddish, or maybe because a man may feel intimidated by a woman ordering one, it seems best to steer away from the humble pint on date night. Strangely, for those playing it super-safe and only drinking soft drinks, this could equally work against you. As alcohol is well known to oil the wheels of a good time, the soft drink option could be viewed as a sign that a person is not really getting into the date, or that they aren’t a fun person to be with.

Sticking to soft drinks could also subconsciously force the other person to opt for them too in order to remain at the same level of sobriety, potentially spoiling their

evening. As perhaps expected, along with the sophisticated cocktail (don’t order the ones with silly or suggestive names), drinking wine was the clear winner for a date.

90% of those surveyed said that drinking red wine was perfectly acceptable, and a poll-topping 100% of responders said that drinking white wine was absolutely fine. Even when choosing the wine option there’s probably still a little room for caution, such as not moving too casually on to a second bottle, or choosing the cheapest bottle on the list.

Whilst these bottles are not necessarily bad, there’s a solid stigma and some truth to the fact that they don’t offer the best value.

You don’t need to pretend that you know loads about wine either, if you don’t. Allowing your date to choose the wine is not only chivalrous but cheekily delegates the decision, and exploring each other’s wine likes and dislikes is also a great way to find common ground.

Cheers!

Read Darren’s blog at vinesight. me

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Brews and Eats Beer columnist Brewery Bird clears a few things up...

Drinkers demand clarity

Clarity. For many drinkers it’s what makes a beer. But in the world of multi-national global brewers and crafty mergers, clarity isn’t always quite so crystal clear.

We are all familiar with the happy situation the UK microbrewing industry has found itself in over the past two decades or so – life has never been better if you’re brewing good beer; but for those who think nothing of corporate takeovers costing billions of £££s, life had become far from rosy; watching their market share slowly shrinking past an unacceptable level as consumers rejected bland global beers in favour of hip, craft brews.

So giants such as AB InBev, SAB Miller & Heineken started buying up smaller, US craft breweries - if you can’t beat ‘em, hell, you may as well buy ‘em - and many loyal craft drinkers agreed this was a BAD thing.

Then, 2016 saw the third largest corporate takeover in history AB InBev (which owns more than 500 brands including Budweiser, Stella and Beck’s) bought its rival SAB Miller (Fosters, Miller, Pilsner

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Urquell) for £71bn, effectively taking control of 30 per cent of the world’s beer production and sales. That same year they bought the Camden Town Brewery, their second English purchase, for £80m, and recently unveiled a brandnew plant in Enfield with greatly increased capacity for the Londonbased brewery. (Meantime Brewing had previously been acquired in 2015 for a whopping £120m but was later sold to Ashai in 2016 in accordance with regulators’ demands prior to the SAB Miller takeover).

Molson Coors UK purchase of Sharps Brewery in Cornwall, makers of the ubiquitous Doom Bar beer for a mere £20m in 2011, seems cheap in comparison! The takeover made headlines again some four years later when the BBC reported that bottled Doom Bar had in fact been produced in Burton-on-Trent for the past two years, much to the anger of consumers who felt that the packaging which still infers it is Cornish brewed, misrepresented the product’s origin. Cask Doom Bar however is still made at the Sharps

Brewery in Rock.

A year on from their merger in 2016, AB InBev who had just snapped up Wicked Weed, a sizeable North Carolina craft brewery – much to the chagrin of drinkers – also quietly, snapped up almost the entire South African hop market effectively cutting off supply of new and important hops to independent American craft brewers.

Now I’m not suggesting that all takeovers are a bad thing – Camden Town brewer and founder Jasper Cuppaidge had been forced to outsource two thirds of its beer production to Belgium due to unprecedented sales growth, but the new Enfield brew plant means an immediate saving and happily, Jasper reports he’s being left alone to ‘get on with it’.

Undoubtedly we will see more ‘purchases’ such as this one by big drinks companies in order to combat slower growth of their mainstream brands; whether this will impact on the quality and provenance of ‘craft products’ in the long term remains to be seen.

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Brews and Eats

Arbequina: sublime tapas

Tapas at its very best - Arbequina

By Ben Fitzgerald At first glance R.A. Neville Dispensing Chemist is not the most obvious place to visit on Oxford’s Cowley Road when you are looking for a post-gig feast.

A careful second look reveals that this is actually the home of Arbequina - whose apologetic sign sits above Mr Neville’s in the town’s newly opened tapas restaurant.

Inside it’s all benches, hard stools, parquet floors and galvanised metal - so far, so functional.

We’ve been given directions to the restaurant by a chef friend of a friend, in much the same way that you might learn about a speakeasy in the days of prohibition America. The word on the street is that this new place has been taken over by some

geezer called Rufus Thurston who has made quite a name for himself at the oversubscribed Oli’s Thai. He’s teamed up with Ben Whyles (you know, that guy from the old Door 74 restaurant..?) and now they’re kicking up a tormenta espanol.

And as soon as we pile in from the cold outside we are enveloped in a delicious garlic laced fug - this is a good sign, as is the fact that the place is packed with patrons tucking into all manner of stunning looking grub.

Don’t ask me what I ate - it was busy, I was enjoying myself too much (I think that’s the general idea) but when I got home I discovered that I had written some notes on the back of my hand - Ox Cheek and Pedro Ximenez. That Ox Cheek - bloody

hell - melt in the mouth beef on a bed of cauliflower puree - was simply sublime. Go there and try it. Oh and Pedro Ximinez sticky sweet port that is beyond compare. Again, go there and try it, I guarantee that you will wake up in the morning with his name written on your hand.. Or possibly some other Spaniard who knows?

The atmosphere was cracking, the menu was simple but everything on there - from the Beetroot borani to the Salt cod croquetas is worth your time. Tell them I sent you.

Arbequina 74 Cowley Road, Oxford, 01865 792777. Open lunch, Tues-Sat, noon-3pm; dinner Mon-Sat, 5.30-10.30pm. About £20-25 a head, plus drinks and service.

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Brews and Eats

Trip two to TOAD Words Claire Dukes Images Claire Williams

In all honesty it was my second time to TOAD. When I visited the distillery once before, naturally I couldn’t help but rave about the place when I got back (despite driving). So upon recieving our second invitation, myself, Ocelot Editor Jamie, and Deputy Editor Ben clambered on an early bus heading to Oxford for a day of serious work, which would just so happen to involve drinking lots of gin, vodka, and whiskey.

The Ocelot were invited to The Oxford Artisan Distillery (TOAD) to celebrate the launch of their latest botanical concoction - Physic Gin. We cordially met the TOAD team and their other guests including the Director of Oxford Botanic Garden, - Professor Simon Hiscock - the Head of Science at Oxford University Botanic Garden, - Chris Thorogood, - and some fellow journalists at The Botanic Gardens in Oxford. Very much in the spirit of TOAD we were all given samples of their latest gin as we walked around the botanic gardens led by Professor Simon Hiscock.

As it just so happens, not only was the event in celebration of TOAD’s latest product, the gin itself marks 400 years of the garden’s history and has been made by the very botanicals from the garden itself.

Everything from the concept of the ingredients and flavour, to the design of the bottle’s label and name of the gin itself, has been hand crafted and created in this most eco-friendly and impassioned process. As such one of the key players through this venture is Jacob Bobart - the original keeper of Oxford Botanic Garden in 1648. It is here that Bobart created the garden’s first catalogue of plants - a catalogue now that TOAD uses to inspire their recipes (including the 25 botanicals used in their Physic Gin). The taste speaks for itself. As we wandered around the gardens listening to fascinating tales of herbology, I

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Professor Simon Hiscock and Master Distiller Cory Mason

TOAD’s Chairman and CEO Tom

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Brews and Eats sipped away at my gin and I was hit by an incredible wave of layers, which was incredibly smooth in texture, first hitting me with an instant sweetness leading to a peppery finish. Yes, it did taste what I imagine a botanical garden to taste like - incredibly fresh.

After our walk we headed back to TOAD for some more sampling of Oxford Dry Gin, Oxford Rye Vodka, and a fresh bottle of TOAD’S first whiskey with which Master Distiller, Cory, whipped up some fabulous Manhattans.

As well as a sampling of the distillery’s products, Cory also enabled us to have a look in the lab, where essentially the magic happens. Hermitted away this is where Cory gets full throtal with his ideas and creativity for new flavours.

But it’s more than just flavours - TOAD only uses pre-1940s grain to create their stills. As a result of this process, the grains are not sprayed with any chemicals or intensive farming which destroys wildlife. Cory explained: “We use the best grain in the world as the base of our product - but obviously wouldn’t sell a booze that didn’t taste fantastic either. Essentially we are saving the world. With our grains and the botanics from the garden, there is no limit to what we can do - every gin is a progression of flavour development, and with that flavour we can tell a story.”

Tom, TOAD’s CEO, added: “With our grain we are bringing fields back to life. One drink at a time, we’re making a difference - that’s what it’s all about here.”

After a look in the lab and what can only be descibed as one of the best history lessons I’ve ever attended, celebrity chef Sophie Grigson russtled up some mouth-watering canapés which leads me to one of my highlights: vodka.

I can’t remember the last time my body didn’t rent out vodka - it’s never gone down well, or sometimes at all. This quickly changed when I rose to the challenge and tried TOAD’s Oxford Rye Vodka (I mean, it would be rude not to) - it was sensational, and even more so with Sophie Grigson’s kipper on cucumber canapé. The saltyness of the fish, crunch of the cucumber and cleaness of the Vodka... I thought I went into some sort of seaside mirage, because combined it tasted like the ocean.

To find out all about the amazing guys at TOAD, visit www.spiritoftoad.com.

And for the brilliant botanists, visit www. botanic-garden.ox.ac.uk.

Chris Thorogood

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Brews and Eats Butternut, red onion & pumpkin seed salad

Pair the sweetness of butternut and roasted red onions for a fantastic winter side salad. To turn it into a full meal, add cooked Puy or dark green lentils, goat’s cheese or feta and perhaps some strips of roasted red peppers.

3 red onions, sliced into 1cm-thick discs 6–7 tbsp olive oil 1 tbsp balsamic vinegar 1 medium butternut squash, peeled & cut into chunks a few thyme sprigs (optional) 30g pumpkin seeds pinch of hot smoked paprika 1 tbsp red or white wine vinegar (or use more balsamic) 1 tsp Dijon mustard, or to taste ¼ tsp crushed garlic, 1 bag of mixed salad leaves

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(100–150g) salt & black pepper Heat the oven to 190°C/Gas 5. Keeping the onion discs whole, place them in a roasting tin and drizzle with a tablespoon or two of olive oil, the balsamic vinegar and a splash of water.

Season with salt and pepper.

Cover the tin with foil and roast for 30–40 minutes on a low shelf in the oven, until the onions are soft and sweet.

Place the squash chunks in another roasting tin, toss with a further tablespoon or so of oil to coat and a good sprinkling of salt and roast for around 30 minutes, until tender and lightly caramelised, throwing in the sprigs of thyme halfway through the cooking time (if using). While

the vegetables are roasting, put the pumpkin seeds in a small pan with a teaspoon of olive oil, a pinch of salt and a pinch of paprika.

Toast over a medium heat, stirring or tossing frequently, until lightly browned, then transfer to a plate to stop them toasting further. Make a simple vinaigrette: whisk together the vinegar, around 3 tablespoons of olive oil, the mustard and garlic to taste. Season with salt and pepper.

Put the salad leaves in a large salad bowl, pour over the dressing and toss to combine.

Scatter over the butternut, onions and seeds.

For more amazing RIverford recipes go to www.riverford. co.uk/recipes

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Brews and Eats

A history of... carrots

By Ben Fitzgerald From the murky world of espionage to being celebrated in the royal courts of Europe, the humble carrot has possibly more influence on the development of human society than any other root vegetable.

The carrot can trace its roots (ahem..) to a wild plant growing in Iran and Afghanistan - almost unrecognisable from the bright orange supermarket staple.

When they were first cultivated, carrots were grown for their aromatic leaves and seeds rather than their roots which were bitter tasting and woody. However, the fact that they could be easily grown and stored meant that they gained popularity.

Today’s orange carrots are almost unrecognisable from

their distant cousins - they are not proud of their relatives and hardly ever pay them a visit.

Ancient carrots ranged from black, white, red and purple but it was only in the 17th century that the orange carrot was cultivated - as a tribute to the ruling House of Orange.

This jaunty orange carrot type named “Daucus carota� quickly gained popularity across Europe and soon became the accepted staple.

Early records show that carrots were used as a food source in 3000 BC - with carrots being found in the tombs of Pharaohs and in Ancient Egyptian wall paintings.

Americans came to the carrot party relatively late in the day with soldiers bringing home tales of the mythical orange veg on

their return from fighting in the trenches during the First World War. And the popularity of the carrot was cemented during the Second World War when the government encouraged civilians to dig for victory and grow their own carrots.

During the war, the British Ministry of Food circulated a rumour that carrots allowed RAF pilots to see in the dark. This was of course total baloney but served as a useful cover story for their recently adopted radar technology - explaining their success in downing German pilots at night.

Fun fact: The largest producer and exporter of carrots in the world is China with 15.8 million tons. Lagging behind are the United States and Russia which both produce 1.3 million tons.

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Theatre Thursday March 1 to Friday March 2 THEATRE: Macbeth Times vary - Swindon Arts Centre Thursday March 1 FAMILY: Play the World - Building & Homes 10am - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford TALKS: Mark Steel 8pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Friday March 2 THEATRE: Vamos Theatre ‘A Brave Face’ 7.15pm - Salisbury Arts Centre THEATRE: The Best of Queen 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon THEATRE: Odyssey 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Friday March 2 to Saturday March 3 BALLET: Vienna Festival Ballet: Swan Lake 7pm - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham THEATRE: Translunar Paradise 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Saturday March 3 THEATRE: The Selector and the Beat, Feat.

Ranking Roger 7pm - Salisbury City Hall MUSIC/TALKS: The Glass Aisle: Paul Henry and Brian Briggs 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford THEATRE: Buddy Holly and The Cricketers 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford THEATRE: That’ll Be The Day 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

COMEDY: Ed Byrne - Spoiler Alert 8pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

THEATRE: Crimes Under The Sun 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre

Wednesday March 7 to Saturday March 10

TALKS: Jason Donovan 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

THEATRE: The Western Players - Bedroom Farce 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre THEATRE: Digging For Victory Times vary - Watermill Theatre, Newbury Wednesday March 7 THEATRE: No Such Thing as a Fish 7.30pm - Oxford Playhouse THEATRE: Point of Echoes 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Thursday March 8 to Saturday March 24 FILM: Banff Mountain Film Festival World Tour Times vary - Salisbury City Hall Thursday March 8 THEATRE: Play the World - Super Space 10am - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford THEATRE: No Such Thing as a Fish 7.30pm - Oxford Playhouse DANCE: At the End We Begin 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford THEATRE: Crooners 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Friday March 9 MUSIC: Buddy Holly and the Cricketers 7pm - Salisbury City Hall COMEDY: Richard Herring - Oh Frig, I’m 50!

8pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Friday March 9 to Saturday March 10

COMEDY: Iain Stirling - U OK HUN? X 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre

THEATRE: Audiograft 7pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

Sunday March 4

DANCE/THEATRE: Moving with the Times 7.30pm - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford

TALKS: TEDxOxford - TED Talks 10.30am - New Theatre, Oxford

Saturday March 10

THEATRE: Theatre and back again: An Odyssey 2pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

FAMILY/DANCE: Tidy Up Times vary - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford

Monday 5 March to Thursday March 8

THEATRE: Cupids Revenge 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

DANCE: Tango Moderno Times vary - New Theatre, Oxford Monday 5 March to Saturday March 10 THEATRE: Of Mice and Men Times vary - Salisbury Playhouse Monday March 5 COMEDY: Rob Delaney - More Meat 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Tuesday March 6 THEATRE: Teechers 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

THEATRE: Bowie Experience - The Golden Years Tour 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

THEATRE: The B*Easts 8pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Wed March 14 to Thursday March 15 THEATRE: The Audit 7.30pm - BT Studio at Oxford Playhouse Wed March 14 to Saturday March 24 THEATRE: Hansel Times vary - Salisbury Playhouse Thursday March 15 to Sat April 21 THEATRE: The Rivals Times vary - Watermill Theatre, Newbury Thursday March 15 THEATRE: Play the World - Brilliant Birds 10am - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford THEATRE: Giant 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot COMEDY: Andrew Lawrence 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre Friday March 16 FILM: Kendal Mountain Festival on Tour 7pm - Salisbury Arts Centre THEATRE: I’d Be Lost Without You 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford THEATRE: Under My Skin 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot THEATRE: Bilal Zafar Biscuit 7.30pm - BT Studio at Oxford Playhouse THEATRE: The Upbeat Beatles 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Friday March 23 MUSIC: Jim Moray - Upceta 7.15pm - Salisbury Arts Centre COMEDY: Sophie Willan - Branded 7.30pm - BT Studio at Oxford Playhouse Friday March 23 to Saturday March 24 FAMILY/THEATRE: Grandad’s Island Times vary - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot DANCE/THEATRE: Sutra 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford

Sunday March 11

Saturday March 24 to Sunday March 25

COMEDY: Phill Jupitus - Juplicity 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre Monday March 12 to Saturday March 17

THEATRE: Monkey Bars 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

THEATRE: The Winslow Boy Times vary - Oxford Playhouse

FAMILY: The Sagas of Noggin the Nog Times vary - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford

Tuesday March 13

COMEDY: Barbara Nice 7.30pm - BT Studio at Oxford Playhouse

COMEDY: Reginald D Hunter 7.30pm - Oxford Playhouse

THEATRE: Theatre Scratch 7.30pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

COMEDY: Rachel Parris: Keynote 8pm - Arts at the Old Fire Station, Oxford

MUSIC: Sorana Santos 7.30pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford

Saturday March 24

COMEDY: Lucy Porter: Choose your Battles 8pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

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Theatre Sunday March 25 FAMILY: The Snow Beast 2.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot THEATRE: Judy and Liza 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

Tribute 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford THEATRE: Holes 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre

7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

Wednesday March 28

FAMILY: Jonny & The Baptists 7.30pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury

COMEDY: Carl Hutchinson - Live!

8pm - Swindon Arts Centre

THEATRE: A Brave Face 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

Monday March 26

TALKS: An Evening With Brian Blessed 7.30pm - City Hall Salisbury

TALKS: An Evening with Martin Kemp 7.15pm - Neeld Community and Arts Centre, Chippenham Tuesday March 27 to Sat March 31 THEATRE: The Flying Lovers of Vitebsk 7.30pm - Salisbury Playhouse Tuesday March 27 MUSIC: Mercury: The Ultimate Queen

Thursday March 29 to Sat March 31 BALLET: The Snow Maiden & Swan Lake Times vary - Wyervn Theatre, Swindon Thursday March 29 FAMILY: Play the World - Down Town 10am - Pegasus Theatre, Oxford THEATRE: Police Cops in Space

THEATRE: 1 Woman, A High Flyer and a Flat Bottom 7.30pm - Oxford Playhouse, Oxford

Friday March 30 MUSIC: A Vision of Elvis 7.30pm - New Theatre. Oxford FAMILY: Barnstormers Comedy 7.45pm - Salisbury Arts Centre Saturday March 31 THEATRE: Circus of Horrors 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford TALKS: An Audience With Mediums 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre

“I pity the fool who falls in love!”

This Spring, secrets, love and mistaken identities collide with a fusion of rich soulful music in a new production of A Midsummer Night’s Dream at The Watermill Theatre, Newbury.

Inspired by the hedonistic sounds of Nina Simone and Billie Holiday, the Watermill Ensemble combine actor-musicianship with one of Shakespeare’s greatest comedies in an energetic new production.

Four lovers escape the decorum of the royal courts, eluding tradition and etiquette on one fateful, intoxicating night in the Athenian woods. Hermia is to be married to Demetrius but she actually loves Lysander. The lovers run away to marry in secret but are pursued by Demetrius who

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has been told by Helena of their plan. During the fateful night that follows, all respectability begins to unravel.

Last year The Watermill’s productions of Twelfth Night and Romeo and Juliet toured the UK and internationally, receiving acclaim for blending contemporary songs with Shakespeare’s classic texts. Familiar hits from artists as varied as Lorde, Mumford and Sons and Postmodern Jukebox were performed live by the cast as they brought to life these two timeless plays.

A Midsummer Night’s Dream continues The Watermill’s commitment to producing innovative ensemble driven Shakespeare productions fused with actor-musicianship. Enter an enchanting world of dreams and passion on a midsummer night and enjoy a fresh new production of one of Shakespeare’s greatest comedies.

A Midsummer Night’s Dream runs from May 10 to June 16 Tickets £26.50 to £15. Book at watermill.org.uk.

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Film review

By Claire Dukes

Last month saw Swindon-based director, Alex Secker, premiere his first feature length film Follow the Crows.

Shaw Ridge’s Cineworld was packed out with guests, cast, and crew dressed to the nines – a memo I definitely missed and so failed to also alert my plus one to. Nevertheless, Cineworld’s foyer was bustling with murmurs of anticipation which quite frankly is a rarity, particularly for an independent film, in a mainstream cinema.

Secker hit the ground running, with regards to his stylisation, from the opening shot; his wide angles and use of desaturated colour were consistent throughout which perfectly set the post-apocalyptic tone for Follow the Crows. The world is seemingly a barren wasteland which is established through open spaces and bare backdrops, echoing similarities between environments seen in The Walking Dead and Black Mirror’s White Bear. The unforgiving landscape is also superbly paralleled by Graeme Osborne’s eerie score piercing through the open spaces. There is also much attention to the natural elements, from the whistling of the wind to the crackling of the fire, that is prominent throughout and highlights the authenticity of location shooting.

Follow the Crows is a thriller to say the least, but also encapsulates conventions most commonly associated

with the horror genre. Secker’s style combined with Osbourne’s score successfully evokes a spine-tingling level of suspense, that also stems from each character’s ambiguous backstory and innate lack of trust.

The main story lies with ‘The Man’ (Max Curtis); a lone-ranger who is first introduced hiking up hills and across fields. It is through The Man that the theme of isolation becomes apparent; he is seen scavenging through discarded items which were suggestively once possessions before the world descended into… well, the bleak outback that is has become. Along the way The Man pairs up with the stranded and feisty, albeit naive, ‘The Woman’. The duo endures the natural elements, hard truths, love, and hostility – as do the film’s subplot characters.

At first there appears to be a disconnect between the individual narratives, although obviously tied together through their post-apocalyptic position, which Secker later connects with a rather remarkable twist.

Using local actors, the assembled cast boast strong performances and portrayed a good sense of chemistry allowing the audience to become integrated with the characters’ relationships. Although there is an ambiguity with backstories, this doesn’t undermine Secker’s enigma-driven plot.

Character relationships and characteristics are established through a strong use of binary opposites, by means of assisting the audience to distinguish Follow the Crows’ heroes and villains (in a world where seemingly there is no good left).

In this respect, it could have been more favourable to have fewer characters to allow more focus on character identity. This does however work to Secker’s advantage given the circumstances which the characters are in – identity seems to almost be too much of a luxury, and the name of the game is simply to survive. However, by allowing more insight into some backstories, this could have enabled the audience to identify more with the characters.

This in turn could have generated more sympathy towards the characters’ more harrowing situations.

That being said, I am incredibly partial to a dark film and admit that this has potentially numbed me over the years.

The framework and foundation that Alex Secker has set down with his first feature film ignites a lot of prospect and anticipation for his next upcoming project. Having funded Follow the Crows independently and via Crowdfunding, the film has been executed in a way that wouldn’t have you guessing that this was Alex’s first feature to date. The end result is something that the cast and crew should be very proud of.

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Interview: Phill Jupitus Claire Dukes and comedian Phill Jupitus talk badges, QI and his latest show Juplicity I only found out three days prior to the interview that I would be having a chat with Phill Jupitus. It was deadline week and needless to say I was little unprepared. But I had written down the bread and butter of questions and convinced myself, whilst agressively brushing my teeth, that everything would go swimmingly. And it did.

As I was brushing up on ‘research’ the phone rang at exactly 9.15am – right on time. I answered and had to admit to Phill that I had somewhat ended up down a QI rabbit hole on YouTube. Lucikly he laughed, and we dove straight in.

Phill’s been on QI for over 10 years and has become, as he put it, “part of the furniture” so the nerves of being on the programme have disappeared. I said it’s quite nice when new panel guests admit they’re intimidated to be on the show, (I’d be bricking it) and as it turns out new guests are often purposely sat next to him for that exact reason.

As fun fact, which he learnt on QI, Phill asked me “Do you know that they put goats in with racehorses?

It’s because goats have a calming effect on the horses, so they put them in there before the races”. This obviously led me to ask, “are you the goat of the QI panel?” “Yes, apparently I have a calming effect on the new visitors” he remarked. This now makes a lot of sense. A few minutes in and I’m chatting away as if I’d met the guy before, and with that my own nerves galloped away.

As well as QI Phill is also a known name from the likes of Never Mind the Buzzcocks, BBC Radio 4’s I’m Sorry I Haven’t a Clue, and The Museum of Curiosity.

It’s a bit cheeky, but I was keen to know if he had a favourite show. “I don’t have a favourite show; more favourite individual moments and I can tell you two of them right now. The first is when Terry Wogan presented Never Mind the Buzzcocks, and I remember I didn’t stop smiling or laughing the entire time.

It was the quickest recording ever for that show. The floor manager went up to Terry and said, ‘You nailed

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it, we don’t need another take’. Now, that was the only time that’s happened in 18 years! The second is when the programme came to an end, Terry thanked everyone, and then he got a standing ovation – again, that has never happened before.”

Phill’s own show, Juplicity, seems to be the next logical topic. When asking what it’s all about, he explained: “People often ask me what I do, and I’m not really sure what I do – genuinely don’t know. I mean I’m a presenter, a stand-up comedian, a poet, and I sew, so the show contains elements of all the things I do.

There’ll be music because

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Interview: Phill Jupitus I was in a band, I will also be bringing back Porky the Poet with new material, and you know a bit of performance art as well.”

With Juplicity Phill is all about playing with convention. I rarely get the opportunity to talk about my dissertation, but not only is Jupitus quick-witted he is also very intellectual, so I mentioned some topics I covered including The White Cube, Lars Von Trier’s Dogville, and Brecht’s ‘breaking the fourth wall’. To my delight Phill chimed

“it is my first and only crime” in “The fourth wall! Ah yes I am definitely mucking about with that. So for example at the interval I will just say ‘interval’, I don’t go anywhere.

I won’t be performing the whole time but I won’t leave the stage during the show” he explained.

He continued “I find it weird [the process of going to a show] cause you go to the bar, get a drink, wait, and then the performer comes on, does their bit and then leaves. What I want to do is deformalize the moment where we start, so when people arrive I will already be on stage listening to records.”

Juplicity sounds as informal as you can get. During the interval Phill will have his bucket of badges and hand out biscuits. I asked what biscuits, he responded: “Tunnocks teacakes – I’m not an idiot. They’re round and soft, so when I throw them out they go the furthest distance with the least amount of damage.

There was one time in Yorkshire though, I threw the tea biscuit and it landed in a gentleman’s pint and it exploded. To that man, I am sorry.”

My immediate response was that the guy couldn’t really complain, he’s got himself a “beery biscuit”.

This is the moment that I made Phill Jupitus laugh (add that to my cv) and pretty much kept the tone for the rest of our light-hearted chat. I said he could use that should he need extra material to which he also laughed and might actually consider it. Naturally I’ll find out when attending his show at Swindon Arts Centre, March 11.

Beery biscuits aside, back to that bucket of badges. Phill shared an anecdote of when the collection began. He was 13, and to this day he said “it is my first and only crime. What I remember most was the moments after I stole the badge, because it was the 20 most terrifying minutes of my life – never again.”

Just as an FYI, the badge in question he still has to this day and it’s an Animal Muppet badge. He continued “But you know, I saved myself 30p.”

Since his descent into badge collecting Phill has been approached by many fans just giving him badges, and now boasts a collection of over 400 (you can’t blame him for losing count). So, Phill is inviting fellow enthusiasts to bring along their badges to his shows for an interval of sweet treats (hopefully without injury) and badge swapping.

I can’t really remember how long we were on the phone, before he had to dash off to another appointment his assistant had pencilled in his schedule.

And I couldn’t decide whether or not we were both being incredibly British and polite when remarking on our lovely chat. Needless to say Phill Jupitus is incredibley humble, easygoing and an all round lovely guy. After hanging up the phone I realised that I didn’t actually ask any of the questions I had so readily prepared for - no awkward small talk needed. It was the perfect start to my Friday.

Juplicity will also be showing at Salisbury Arts Centre, April 27. Visit www.offthekerb.co.uk

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Swindon Fringe Festival

Swindon Fringe Festival tickets are now on sale!

The Swindon Fringe is back and this year it’s even bigger!

From April 4 to 15 2018, there’s something for all ages to enjoy including fabulous comedians, fun family shows, exciting workshops, and live music courtesy of The Groovy Pig Music Festival.

Never has it been a more exciting time to for you to witness artists testing their new material and getting your feedback on their performances – you might find yourself watching the next Dara Ó Briain or Tony Award winner. Who knows!

Unlike some of the bigger events across the UK, the Swindon Fringe, or “the Swinge” as it is affectionately known, does not charge those who take part. Government cuts to arts funding means that money made from ticket sales go straight to the artists, to allow them to continue developing their projects and keep their tour on the move.

The Swinge welcomes both local and international acts and some of the topics covered in this year’s line-up are both daring and thought-provoking: The Casting is a slick modern drama examining desperation, greed and dignity, whilst I am not a Soldier is a semi-autobiographical account of one woman’s struggles with PTSD. Till Debt Us Do Part takes a humorous but profound look at money troubles in the modern world, whereas Connie’s Colander is an honest and in-

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timate look at Alzheimer’s. Swindon writer Matt Fox’s brutally dark comedy The Ladykillers will be performed by San Francisco’s The Shelton Theater Company, and Swinge legend Rob Gee is back with his one-man show, Fruitcake: Ten Commandments from the Psych Ward.

This is your opportunity to watch acts perfect their material prior to the Brighton Fringe in May, the Greater Manchester Fringe in July and the Edinburgh Fringe in August. Most of the shows are paired together, giving the audience more variety and the acts the chance to network and possibly win an award.

The Swindon Fringe has grown phenomenally in both talent and vision since its inception.

It was a local theatre producing company, Madam Renards, who offered their own home to performers and writers in Swindon for one night only, their aim being to showcase 5 to 10 minute pieces amongst friends and family. This event was nicknamed it the Mini-Fringe Festival and with laughs, tears and drinks shared, it turned into a successful event. Six years later it has now become the premiere Fringe festival in Swindon, running over twelve days and spanning across various venues.

One of the new locations this year is The Crossing in the Brunel Shopping Centre. Ideally situated in the town centre, The Swindon Fringe opening night will take place there on Friday

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Swindon Fringe Festival

Ocelot Comedy Night - April 12

Nowhere Man - Shelton Theatre

El Diablo Of The Cards - Ewerton Martins

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April 6, and then the centre will play host to family-friendly entertainment throughout the rest of the festival. Children have the opportunity to see clowns and magicians perform their tricks and have a go at arts and crafts, whilst for everyone else there will be live music, spoken word and drama and improv workshops in the Arcade.

The Swindon Fringe prides itself in teaming up with like-minded creatives to promote new and exciting entertainment, and this year is no different – 2018 sees the debut of Shout Out Production’s FilmAtSwinge (International Film Festival at Swindon Fringe), from April 4 to 6. It’s a three day exhibition of Feature Films, Short Movies, Documentaries, Quick Clips and Arthouse from local, national and international filmmakers, and will be running over 5 sessions at MECA. Highlights of this year’s Swinge include The Groovy Pig Music Festival at The Victoria on Sunday April 8.

Back by popular demand The Groovy Pig will have something for everyone with a selection of Rock, Pop, Jazz, Reggae, Funk, Folk, Blues and Flamenco.

Nine different bands will grace the stage in the back room of The Victoria. For all you comedy lovers there will be an Improv double-header at The Phoenix theatre, New College, and the Ocelot Comedy Night on Thursday April 12 at The Victoria.

The Opening Night at The Crossing will be a fun evening of drinks, raffles, prizes and entertainment provided by local musicians and stand-up comedian Tony Cowards. Workshops in The Crossing and The Arcade include learning about drama with Peter Hynds, Juggling with Madi, and a Clown Workshop for Children by Swindon Fringe Festival Award Winner Bianca Bertalott. Don’t miss the quirky El Diablo of the Cards and PQA’s Dee Thompson narrating The Fairy Prince, also at the Brunel. Last but certainly not least, the Swinge will present SOLO2 – an eclectic dynamic afternoon of contemporary monologues/ Solo performances, featuring a range of new writing, some being performed for the first time. The schedule on Sunday April 15 includes traditional and experimental character acting (from all ages 16+ and diverse characters), multimedia/film presentations as well as readings from award winning writers.

All tickets are available from the Wyvern Theatre Box Office. You can either purchase individual tickets or get yourself a platinum ticket (£50), giving you access to every show during the Swindon Fringe Festival. The Ocelot Comedy Night and The Groovy Pig Music Festival are offering a Pay What You Want system so you can give what you feel the performance was worth into the buckets provided.

For more information, simply go to the official website: www.swindonfringefestival.com

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Gig Monkey

Sad Song Co.

Sad Song Co. – Worth When Oxford musician Nigel Powell isn’t playing drums for Frank Turner or being a part of Dive Dive or The Unbelievable Truth, he has his own thing going on with The Sad Song Co., a downbeat, low key solo project. His new album, Worth, is written from a very personal perspective, journeying through what value can be found in risk, friendship, relationships, and self. A hopeful and positive glimpse into the intimate, inner thoughts of the songwriter, it certainly isn’t a comfortable listen, with the diverse tempo and vocal shifts adding to the personal subject matter fully ensuring you can’t allow yourself any complacency when listening. This is an album to be appreciated quietly, allowing yourself to trail the ebbs and flows of the music, following it to wherever it takes you.

Grasslands – Flames, Doorways, Grass and Time The man behind Grasslands, ecologist Tom Haynes, told me when he gave me this album that “I might find one track on it I liked” as he understands both my musical tastes and the divisiveness of his own music. Well Mr Haynes, you were wrong. Yes, this is a difficult record to understand and immerse yourself in, but there is as much to love about it as there is to puzzle over. Based around timeless folk sounds and melodies the songs build layers of loops, beats, synths, effect laden and bizarre soundscapes and wild sounds and disjointed vocals. I had feared this approach would come over clumsily and confusing, but it ends up mostly precise and measured and genuinely hypnotic and fascinating.

The Fairings – Adolescent Heart

I love it when something just comes from out of nowhere and knocks you sideways. The Fairings were a totally new thing to me, and I now wonder how I have managed in my life so far without them in it. Adolescent Heart is a breathtakingly beautiful collection of songs that tug at the heart strings and all that they are connected to. Drawing influence from some of the great songwriters across the folk spectrum and adding a modern seasoning these achingly wonderful songs are whimsical, vibrant and fragile all at once and oh so English. Certainly one of the most impressive things I have heard in a long while.

Mr G & Rich – Terminal Window Another month and another ex-Winchell Riot appears with new music (the Rich to his brothers Mr G).

This time, it is a more strident project, and one rooted in post rock and alternative pop. Impossible to pigeon-hole with any hope of accuracy this album haunts, rocks and flows in equal measure. The songs are eulogies to family, parenthood and loss, chronicling the brothers’ lives, thoughts and emotions. It is not a pretty or light record, but it is creative, deep, dark and personal and well worth a listen.

The Harlers – Heart of Gold I just had to squeeze this in as it is simply superb.

One of the hottest bands in Swindon right now, The Harlers, have just dropped a new single, and it is an absolute blinder. Rocking like The Black Keys would if they had found a substantial stash of premium grade steroids at the back of the rehearsal room, Heart of Gold is as ruthless a statement as you could hope for.

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Interview: Paul Draper Claire Dukes talks with Paul Draper about his latest album Spooky Action, and life after Mansun.

I caught up with Paul Draper on a Friday afternoon to talk all things past, present and future. When asking how it went in the studio the day before, he humbly answered in a still present Liverpudlian accent “okay, just one of those days.”

Since Mansun’s split back in 2003 Draper has hardly been living in the shadows from his former career as the band’s frontman. The 90s rock band earned him iconic status with tracks including Wide Open Space, I can Only Disappoint U, and Stripper Vicar. Over the last decade he’s been busy exploring other outlets including song writing and producing.

Following sold-out shows last year Draper and his team decided to head out on tour again this year, hitting some of the bigger venues including Oxford’s O2 Academy March 7 – it’s his first expedition as a solo artist with Spooky Action. Having originally set out to play six small gigs last year he said how he was “surprised and really grateful” to hear of the reaction, it was “mind boggling to everyone involved” he said.

I had a listen to Spooky Action a few months back, not having in mind at the time that I would have the artist himself on the phone to talk me through it.

Draper explained “I started this album a long long time ago, not too long after Mansun broke up. The name comes from [laughs] a physics book actually, by

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Albert Einstein -” (I looked it up, it’s called ‘Spooky Action at a Distance’) “it explained how particles could have an effect on other particles from a distance, if that makes sense? So yeah, it’s a continuation of my career from Mansun into my solo career. Spooky Action is quite dark lyrically as it’s about the past - expressing the backstabbing and betrayal I felt -” to which he did jest whether or not I was worried I’d answer the phone to a miserable git, and I won’t lie it did cross my mind (just listen to some tracks from Spooky Action), but thankfully quite the opposite “it stems from a consciousness I genuinely felt after the band broke up, and I shelved it as a solo album then went on to have great success as a producer and writer. Years later my manager just came up to me and said ‘it’s time’ regarding my own album, and I already had the lyrics written. It’s my own emotional perspective about Mansun’s split and a hybridisation of a Mansun record and me under a different name – I’ve updated it to the modern world – but want it to still be relevant.”

For any solo artist rising from an acclaimed career as part of a band, especially 15 years later, to venture out as a solo artist must be quite a daunting prospect. “Time’s

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Interview: Paul Draper been kind,” Draper remarked, “I was quite the archetypal angry young man in Masun, but I’ve mellowed out now. I didn’t know what to expect really, until I toured last year, but the audience seems to be really gravitating to where I am now. With Mansun I thought to myself ‘I am never going to be able to ditch these songs’ and I never saw myself as a solo artist until last year, but I didn’t want to go backwards.” He referenced Paul Weller’s transition from The Jam into a solo artist and remarked that he had a nice balance which adhered to Jam fans but still enabled Weller to push forward and be acknowledged as a solo identity, which is what Draper is hoping

to do with his current tour. He continued “It’s very different now though, cause I’m an old man. I mean, for the last run of gigs I was actually quite ill so was playing a set and would then go back stage to take some antibiotics.“ “Very rock ‘n’ roll” I jabbed, to which he responsed “Ha, no, my rock ‘n’ roll days are over.”

Despite Draper’s drive to move on from Mansun, it’s not surprising that many of his fans will have stemmed from that period of his life. When asking how he approaches this, he said “Me and my band came up with a cunning plan. We play 1 hour of my music, we walk off and do all that and then come back on to play 3 Mansun tracks.” Everybody’s happy! Even with his earlier success, Draper added “I much prefer being a relevant artist by playing my own solo stuff.”

So when Paul Draper actually has time off,

what does he do? “Ha, work is my thing - I’m a workaholic! I mean my hobby is messing around in my studio - I can be in there for weeks!

“I’ve only just really learnt the meaning behind ‘The Tortoise and the Hare’. Back in the day I would just work until I dropped - I

“my rock ‘n’ roll days are over”

remember once waking up on my guitar, I was very much the hare. Now I pace myself, and now I know what the fable means.

Aside from that I’m into my football, support Liverpool, otherwise my dad would be very cross with me - enjoy going around galleries, looking at architecture, and I read a lot.”

Tickets are still available for Oxford’s O2 Academy - www.academymusicgroup.com

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Mandolin Orange

Mandolin Orange at The Bullingdon

By James Queralt

Playing out this year’s seemingly eternal January was Americana/ folk duo Mandolin Orange, who arrived at the Bullingdon’s back room for the penultimate show of the UK leg of their European tour.

Indeed, it seemed an apt time to catch this set, as the audience were treated to a band equally as comfortable delivering melancholy, reflective country tones as they were starting whiskey-soaked hoedowns.

The pair, who formed Mandolin Orange in 2009 in Chapel Hill, North Carolina after meeting at a jam session on the night of President Obama’s inauguration, received a warm reception as they collected their casually leaning instruments on stage.

“We’re gonna play a bunch of tunes for y’all,” announced fiddler-cum-rhythm guitarist Emily Frantz, – Frantz originally trained as a fiddler, but has found herself increasingly switching to the guitar to accommodate partner Andrew Marlin’s obsession with the mandolin. The instrument from

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which the band takes its name is certainly mesmerising when in the right pair of hands, and the audience’s quiet captivation as Marlin strummed a particularly intricate riff halfway through 2011’s bluesy ‘Wake Me’ would seem to suggest that he is just that.

They followed that up with ‘Hey Stranger,’ the opener off 2016 album Blindfaller. For this track, Franz, usually providing the harmony to Marlin’s strong lead vocals, takes on the lead mantle. The result is a melancholic, nostalgic tale warning against “living with trouble in mind.” With this and other more recent tracks, the duo’s effortless harmony is on full show as they opt for a less expansive, more spontaneous approach – a throwback to country icons such as Emmylou Harris. Frantz’s gentle yet passionate vocals also reminded me of Swedish folk duo First Aid Kit’s Soderberg sisters, an excellent string to their bow (or mandolin, fiddle, guitar, banjo

etc.) in terms of versatility, given the fact that Marlin is generally recognised as lead vocalist. The songs briefly continued down the pensive route, but the band recognised the funny side, as Marlin introduced 2013’s ‘There Was a Time’ by announcing that “this is a song about divorce. It’s from the perspective of our old neighbour’s ex-wife. She doesn’t know that, I don’t think she’d be too happy about it.” The track was markedly Parton-esque and its sombre hook, “there was a time when I called you mine,” could easily see the song work as a ‘Jolene’ sequel, especially considering its context.

To close the gig, Frantz picked up her fiddle and, as Marlin explained, “detuned it so it sounds more old-timey.” A full-on hand-clapping, foot-stomping hoedown was now in progress, with hoots and whistles flying from the crowd, as the Bully was briefly on the verge of being transformed into a South-eastern America-inspired square dance.

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Black Sheep Apprentice

The Ocelot presents: Black Sheep Apprentice

By Claire Dukes

It’s rare when you come across an album and immediately take to it. It’s even more rare when the album isn’t even technically finished.

Swindon four-piece band Black Sheep Apprentice are just about ready to release their latest album Born to Walk Alone - the title is perfect. For all the seemingly sinister attributes, mainly from the lyrics, there’s something almost quite uplifting about the tracks - a sort of perserverance. Maybe it’s the really tantilising sounds of guitar reverbs which infuse beautifully with their bluesy-rock and americana twangs.

Black Sheep Apprentice is made up of Richard “Skiddy” Skidmore as lead vocals and acoustic guitar, Paul “Paj” Jellings on electric guitar and backing vocals, Juan Guanchez

on drums, and Tim Owen on bass guitar - there’s a very mature aura around them, and it’s immediately identifiable through not only their lyrics but musical capabilities as well.

Let it Go is a track which really stands out for me. The opening is really well crafted with the use of drums, a church bell, and horses galloping in the distance.

This would be a remarkable opening song for a road movie, or modern western - this is where their ‘Dark Country’ genre really lends itself. It encapsulates all the rock elements of The Yard Birds and Doves, with americana attributes which resonates with the likes of The Coral - they’ve managed to cross the boaders with mutiple genres without losing a sense of identity.

As I lay down somewhat hungover, still determined to do my

job and listen to the album a few times before trying to write, the tracks weirdly ignited a kind of sadistic joy particularly with lyrics from Water Mix which Skiddy dryly sings “Can anybody spare me a glass of water? I need to rehydrate my soul” - well, that just summed up my Sunday.

I’d be keen to find out how Black Sheep Apprentice translate live on stage. The record itself has lo-fi elements which paves room for a more raw sound - this quality actually compliments their sound as opposed to overbearing it. I’d be really game to see these guys in action, and am happy to recommend Ocelot readers to to do the same.

For more information, and updates on their upcoming release, go to www.blacksheepapprentice.com

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Music News Witness the shear magic of Black Sheep Apprentice Black Sheep Apprentice will be celebrating the launch of their new album, Born To Walk Alone at Swindon Arts Centre at the end of the month.

Inspired by the likes of Johnny Cash, Nick Cave, B.B.King, Roy Orbison, Tom Petty, Motorhead, ZZ Top and The Doors to name a few, Black Sheep Apprentice present their own unique genre of ‘country music catered for a more adult audience’.

Featuring a host of guest musicians and the fantastic Sophia Marshall Band and Kid Calico

& The Astral Ponies as special guests, this is a night not to be missed. Black Sheep Apprentice

are set to appear at Swindon Arts Centre on Thursday 29 March 2018.

It’s fun to be a lunatic!

Oxford’s O2 Academy are hosting the legendary Blockheads on Saturday March 3.

The new wave funk and rock ‘n roll outfit The Blockheads, originally fronted by the late Ian Dury, will return to the stage with a full catalogue of fan favourites as they continue to build their wall of sound. Doors open at 7pm.

For further information and tickets, log on to www. academymusicgroup.com/o2academyoxford/events

Neeld champions grassroots acts with Battle of the Bands Take The Stage is back! The under-21s ‘Battle of the Bands’ event, hosted by Riverbank Studios, sees the winners playing slots at Fieldview Festival and Chippfest as well as prizes of free recording time and more.

There will be four Friday night heats running from February through to the final in March.

Come along and support local talent!

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Music News

It’s Cornbury time again!

Canadian sass will be in no short supply when Alanis Morissette headlines at the Cornbury Festival in July.

Other notables include Mavis Staples, Amy MacDonald and Pixie Lott.

The well-regarded festival is one-ofa-kind: a lovingly crafted, top notch, very English open air party, tailor-made for the whole family.

Like the best

of England, The Cornbury Music Festival is civilised, charming and irresistible – a homespun melting pot where music-lovers share pies and a glass of champagne with superstars, toffs, rockers, crooners, Morris dancers, farmers, urbanites, fashionistas, gourmet chefs and little old ladies who make exceptional cakes.

In short, The Cornbury Music

Festival represents classic summer entertainment for a friendly crowd from all walks of life.

A country fair with a rock ‘n’ roll twist; a farmers’ market with a dancefloor; a local carnival with a classic contemporary soundtrack.

The event takes place on 13, 14 and 15 July.

For more information about the event visit www. cornburyfestival.com

Our main Squeeze this month is Chris Difford Chris Difford is a rare breed. As a member of one of London’s best-loved bands, the Squeeze co-founder has made a lasting contribution to English music with hits such as ‘Cool For Cats’, ‘Up The Junction’, ‘Labelled With Love’, ‘Hourglass’ and ‘Tempted’.

Despite the fact that Chris has helped soundtrack so many fans’ lives since his first release in 1977, the passion for innovation and love of playing still drives him to carry on writing rather than sit back and admire his handiwork.

March 2018 sees Chris on tour with Boo Hewerdine on his extensive ‘Some Fantastic Acoustic Book Tour’ The dates take them to Ireland, Scotland, Wales and all over the UK. An American tour is also being planned for May. Beyond the touring there is a paperback version of the book coming out with an extra chapter carefully composed as a bonus read.

Chris will regale the audience about some of the key events in his life in music from his autobiography ‘Some Fantastic Place’ and perform some of his biggest hits acoustically alongside tracks from ‘Pants’, a best of album featuring songs from a stage play created by

Chris and Boo Hewerdine a couple of years ago. Both album and book will be available to buy at the show.

Over the course of a 13 album career with Squeeze, it was clear from the very beginning that Chris Difford has few peers when it comes to smart, pithy lyricism. His ‘kitchen sink-drama’ style has drawn plaudits from fans on both sides of the Atlantic, while his influence is keenly felt today.

The likes of Lily Allen and Mark Ronson, Kasabian, and The Feeling have all recognised the debt they owe to Squeeze’s music and to Difford’s way with words, while journalists were moved by his winning combination with Glenn Tilbrook to dub the pair ‘The New Lennon and McCartney’.

He’s coming to Winchester’s Railway Inn on March 17, St John’s College, Oxford March 21 and Bristol Folk House on March 23.

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Gig list

Thursday March 1

11pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

6pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford

Matt Edwards Band 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Simple Feat. Objekt 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Mat Caron + Tremolo Ghosts + Will Davies 7pm - Darkroom Espresso, Swindon

Liquid Library presents: Fort Boyard 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Sunday March 4

Dragster + The Setbacks + Kearney’s Jig 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

Plugged-in Singers Night 8pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham Ian Kenna 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon Friday March 2 Patrick Monahan – Rewind Selector 90’s 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Unplugged (open mic) 7.30pm - ACE Space, Newbury Cantaloop 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Steve Knightley 8pm - Marlborough Town Hall Vatican Romp + We Know John 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury The Brian Adams Experience 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Hip Route 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Monday March 5

Kill the Ideal + All Ears Avow 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Swindon

All Welcome Night 8pm - The Lamb Inn, Devizes

Echo 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough

Tuesday March 6

The Skanxters + Special Guests 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Singaround 8pm - The Cellar Bar, Oxford Wednesday March 7 Paul Draper 6.30pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Adam Bomb 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Wacky Wednesday 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon Thursday March 8 Youth Movies 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Firefly 9pm - The Queen’s Tap, Swindon Penfold 9pm - Woodlands Edge, Swindon The Britpop Boys 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney DirtyJackDC 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Parker Monkeys ft Adam Ficek (Baby Shambles) DJ Set 11pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford

Ginger Wildheart + Oxygen Thief 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Under Suspicion 9pm - The Mermaid, Burford

Subtropical Feat Dub Boy B2B ATKI2 Feat Mc Jonzey 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Singers Night 8pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham

Aftershow Party 11.30pm - Fat Lil’s. Witney

Barrelhouse 9.30pm - Groove Company Inn, Swindon

Friday March 9

Sunday March 11

Space 6.30pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford

Simon Evans 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Faustus 8pm - ACE Space, Newbury

Urban Chorts 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

Gaz Brookfield + Support 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury

Monday March 12

The Strays 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

Aftershow Party 11pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney The Raving Trippy 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Saturday March 3 The Blockheads 6pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Danny and the Champions of the World 7.30pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Ragweed + Hamaria 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon The Tribe + Support 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury Last Call 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Monkeydolls 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough Chaos Bros 9pm - The Queen’s Tap, Swindon Ultimate Band 9pm - Woodlands Edge, Swindon Day Breakers 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Aftershow Party

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The Forgetting Curve + Head Noise + Mireille Mathlener 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Peter and the Test Tube Babies + Support 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Blondie Tribute 9pm - The Mermaid, Burford Bon Giovi 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Damn Good Reason 9pm - The Queen’s Tap, Swindon Natt Davis 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Aftershow Party 11pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney IC3 Genres 11pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Saturday March 10 Sleeper

Fickle Friends 7pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford All Welcome Night 8pm - The Lamb Inn, Devizes Wednesday March 14 Milk Teeth 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Wacky Wednesday 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon Thursday March 15 Will Wilde Band 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Singers Night 8pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham This Feeling + Special Guests 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Friday March 16 Alabama 3 6.30pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford

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The Amy Winehouse Experience 6.30pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford

Wacky Wednesday 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Rob Auton – The Hair Show 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Thursday March 22

The Doors Alive 8pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney The Troubleshooters 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Thuum + Cutlass 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury Stop Stop 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Down & Dirty 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

MT. Wolf 7.30pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Spotlight Night 8pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham True Strays 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Friday March 23 Gwenno 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Rebel Heroes 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

Rockbudz Band 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon

Shades of Seattle 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Saturday March 17

Angel up Front 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

Ferocious Dog 6.30pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford St Patricks Day Party 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury The Boothill All-Stars 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Kevin Lovatt (Country Legends) 8.30pm - The Castle Inn, Swindon No Middle Ground 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough The Britpop Boys 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon The Britpop Boys 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon System-D 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon The Standard 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Locarno Beat 9pm - The Mermaid, Burford Teddy White 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Diss Hand In 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Aftershow Party 11.30pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Saturday March 24 Turin Brakes 6.30pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Honey + Wolf Note 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon The Jimmy Hillbillies + Support 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury The Strays 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough

The Sweetchunks 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon

Banksy 9pm - The Harrow Inn, Wanborough

Aftershow Party 11.30pm - Fat Lil’s. Witney

In It For The Money 9pm - Woodlands Edge, Swindon

Sunday March 18 The AC/DC Experience 7pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford The Worried Men 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon Monday March 19 Guy Chant 8pm - The Lamb Inn, Devizes Tuesday March 20 Rave Mom’s 7pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Singaround 8pm - The Cellar Bar, Oxford Wednesday March 21

Gig List

8pm - The Lamb Inn, Devizes Tuesday March 27

Geoff Lakeman 8pm - The Cellar Bar, Oxford Wednesday March 28 Geoff Achison & The Soul Diggers 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Wacky Wednesday 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon Thursday March 29 Noasis 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Singers’ Night 8pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham Vicfest 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Friday March 30 Super Hans 7pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Belladonna 9pm - Woodlands Edge, Swindon Lewis Leighton 9pm - The Mermaid, Burford Natt Davis 9pm - The Cross Keys, Swindon Wizards of Oz 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon The Hep Cat Trio 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon Prism/Spectrum 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford White Magic Birthday Bash ft Seani B 11pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford Saturday March 31 SexJazz 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon Blunders 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

The Naughties 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

Cursus Festival Warm Up! with Smiley & the Underclass, The Intercepteurs 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury

Tenacious-G/Terrorsaurs 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon

Blackmax & The Pirates 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough

Skylarkin Presents Mungo’s Hi-Fi Full Soundsystem Show 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Shepherds Pie 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

Sunday March 25

Hamsters From Hell 9.30pm - Groves Company Inn, Swindon

Monthly Blues Jam 3pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Rawdio Presents Metal Heads 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

The Lewis Craven Band 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford on Avon

Aftershow Party 11.30pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Monday March 26 All Welcome Night

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Agony Girl Five year old Amy got more toys than you can shake a stick at for her birthday but she still finds time to do Agony Girl. We ask her the questions and these are her answers.... honest!

Dear Amy, I’ve got three kids and no matter what I do they don’t tidy up after themselves. As soon as I finish a room they come in like a whirlwind and mess it up again. How can I get them to be more tidy?

Marge, Oxford Get some more toys then they will tidy up. Because if you be bad and you say somethings bad, they will tidy up and they will do what you say.

Dear Amy, I hear you just celebrated your fifth birthday. What’s it like being five?

Dave, Reading Fun. Because it’s just been my birthday. It feels different because it does.

Dear Amy, My husband seems to be never home as he’s always working. I get incredibly lonely whilst he’s working. Do you know of any good hobbies I could do to keep myself busy?

Diana, Newbury Get some friends and they will come to keep you not lonely. You could play board games.

And cards. And puppet shows.

Dear Amy, I always try to give to charity but just lately I haven’t had enough money. Is there 46

anything else I can do to help people out?

Naomi, Witney Get some more toys and then they will take them and get some money and then help them even homeless people. Please can you give them money by calling someone - ring, ring ring.

Dear Amy, Who would win in a fight, a crocodile or a shark?

Damon, Salisbury I think a shark because a shark has a big mouth and it could win as it could gobble it up in a whole munch.

Dear Amy, Can you come and make me a cup of tea?

Darren, Devizes Yes. I can. You put salt in and then sugar and then milk. Mix it up. Put it in the fridge for a minute and that’s it.

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