Ocelot 145 july 2018 final artwork

No: 145 July 2018

Wiltshire, Oxfordshire and West Berkshire

Free

The hottest ticket in town Olivier Award winning comedy, The Rise and Fall of Little Voice comes to The Barn Theatre in Cirencester p240

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#145 For Starters

JULY ISSUE

04 The Rant + Luke Coleman 06 Encyclopaedia Oceloticca 08 The Bassett Rivers Echo Lifestyle

10 Get Away 12 Get A Life 13 TV 14 Style 16 Gaming Brews and Eats

17 Oxford Blue 18 Wine not?

19 Brewery Bird 20 The Wild Duck 22 The History of Crisps Arts and Culture

23 The Theatre List 24 Barn Theatre 28 Devizes Carnival 30 Henley Festival Music

34 Swindon Shuffle 37 Cornbury Festival 38 Truck Festival 39 Festival on the Farm 41 Music News 42 Gig List The Final Bit of the magazine

44 Book Review 46 Agony Girl

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Shufflin’ around

July’s always a good month around these parts especially as a lot of the festivals we’ve been writing about for months finally come to fruition.

And it’s a mouth-watering mix of events you can wrap your cakehole about.

There’s Cornbury Festival, Swindon Shuffle, Avebury Rocks, Henley Festival, Festival on the Farm, Truck Festival and loads more.

This year I’m especially excited about The Swindon Shuffle who seem to have created an inspired line-up that has something for anyone (well, I say anyone but obviously I’m not counting my old friend Brian who is only into Icelandic flute orchestras). One act who I haven’t caught for a good few years that I’m getting in a lather about is Slagerij who will be at The Castle on Thursday July 12. I feel that their ska punk antics are a part of Ocelot history and can’t really be missed so if you keep your eagle eye out you might spot me, an overweight 43 three year old, dad-moshing at the front. Also look out for the excellent Canute’s Plastic Army (pictured).

The Barn Theatre in Cirencester is also in the spotlight this month and what an arts venue with good pedigree it’s turning out to be. Find it on page 24.

Write in to me at jamie@theocelot.co.uk

Jamie Hill

Editor: Jamie Hill - jamie@theocelot.co.uk Deputy: Ben Fitzgerald - ben@theocelot.co.uk Reporter: Claire Dukes - claire@theocelot.co.uk Sales: Dave Stewart dave@theocelot.co.uk - 07872 176999 Rosy Presley rosy@positivemediagroup. press - 07717 501790 Nataley Fryer nataley@positivemedia group.press - 07769 978823 Telephone: 01793 781986 Publisher: Positive Media Group, Unit 3, Arclite House, Peatmoor, Swindon SN5 5YN Printers: Deltor, Saltash, Cornwall 25/06/2018 18:45

For Starters

Socks and violence

By Ocelot Editor Jamie Hill As a journalist I tend to be a bystander in life. I’m a witness to events. Never really involved - just a spectator writing about stuff other people are doing.

But just sometimes you unwittingly become a part of the story yourself.

This happened to me in June when I got brutally attacked during a night out in Swindon and my wallet stolen.

As a news story muggings are sadly commonplace so tend not to get the column inches that they deserve.

Although for the victim they are traumatic and a huge life event.

But what made this particular mugging stand out was the weapon that I believed they used - a snooker ball in a sock - which pulverised me four times in the face leaving me an unconscious bloody mess on the floor. I was one of four attacks on the same night. And it was the weapon that was used and the brutality (I was hit twice before they even asked for my wallet) that made the story stand out. I think the only weapon that would have made the story stand out more is if the muggers used a trebuchet.

I’m fine now by the way. Determined not to be a victim I wrote a first person piece for my other publication Swindon Link and when the police finally had CCTV images we shared them far and wide to make sure that the gang of youths carrying out these attacks were picked up.

The fact that I see something that happened to me as a

‘story’ is a bit weird. It shows you the bizarre mindset that a journalist must have where everything is broken down to its newsworthiness. I suppose this self-imposed abstraction from real life that journalists possess helps us to distance ourselves from the real trauma of the events that we cover so that we don’t become psychological messes. It explains gallows’ humour. But it’s a bit different when it happens to you. It actually brings it home that we are writing about real people and that each story, whether good or bad, has real consequences.

It’s not the first time this has happened to me as two decades ago I witnessed a Triad murder involving baseball bats and machetes and about 20 suspects on an Essex roundabout. I was a mess for years about that one but hopefully this latest incident will be dealt with a lot easier and only leave me with an irrational fear of socks.

Off The Grid with Luke Coleman - Our man in Iraq World Cup time is forever going to be tainted for me. It was the night of the opening game in Brazil four years ago that I was told of the death of my dear friend Kamaran Najm.

Leading his band of Iraqi photojournalists in Kirkuk in the initial days of the ISIS rampage, Kamaran was hit in the neck by a bullet. He was loaded onto the back of a pick up, which accelerated too fast.

He fell off the back, and was picked up by ISIS sometime in the next few hours.

On the way to the funeral the next day, I was informed that he was alive, and that he was being searched for. To cut a long story short, we’ve been looking for him since.

It’s necessitated total radio silence, not wanting the militants to know who they had. Hope, while still there, hangs by a thread. And we talk about him in public now, we want the world to know that a dear man, the kindest of friends, is missing.

The last time I saw him, he was running a free project in a park in Sulaymaniyah. We walked around that Friday afternoon, finding migrant workers from Nepal, the Philippines, India, Ethiopia.

We had an outdoor studio, took portraits of people alone, in couples and groups, and then gave them a digital and printed copy.

Whatever the situation, Kamaran was always working an angle to improve people’s lives and this small gesture was typical.

I love you brother. We’ll meet again.

Missing my dear friend during the World Cup

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www.theocelot.co.uk

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Science Fact: Planet Nine from outer space

Encyclopedia Ocelotica The search for Planet Nine

by Ben Fitzgerald

By Ben Fitzgerald Not so many years ago I worked as a primary school teacher.

Trying to explain to a class of seven and eight year olds that the planets in the Solar System are very far away from each other was impossible without a physical example.

The well-worn ‘peppercorn’ example is the best way of underlining the vast distances involved.

If a single peppercorn represents the Earth and Venus, the Sun is the size of a football, Mars and Mercury are mere pinheads, with Jupiter being a chestnut, Saturn a hazelnut and Uranus a coffee bean.

We would venture out onto the school field and place the Sun (football) at one end of the field.

Then we would walk 10 paces and place Mercury (a pinhead in a piece of paper), then a further

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9 paces - Venus (peppercorn), 7 paces - Earth (peppercorn), 14 paces - Mars (pinhead). And then walk 95 paces Jupiter (chestnut), another 112 paces - Saturn, 249 paces - Uranus, 281 paces Neptune and finally another 242 paces for Pluto (yes I know it’s not a planet).

It’s utterly jaw dropping to think that gravity can have an effect over such a long distance - when you think of something the size of the head of a pin orbiting a bowling ball the length of eight football pitches away.

So when astronomers at the University of Michigan discovered an asteroid (BP519) in 2015 which was 55 times the Earth’s distance to the Sun - they were surprised to see that it was following a highly unusual orbit which they concluded might suggest it was being affected

by a hitherto undiscovered planet.

For this theory to work, the mysterious planet - now called Planet 9 - could be as much as 15 times the mass of the Earth.

But despite its size, it would be exceedingly difficult to find because it is hundreds of times further from the Sun than the Earth and emits no light of its own.

If Planet Nine - a super Earth - is out there somewhere, it would be a spectacular find and would replace The Earth as the largest rocky planet in the Solar System.

The search is now underway for Earth’s massive twin with astronomers scouring the skies for other objects such as BP519 whose orbits may be affected by the gravitational pull of the missing planet and may lend further clues to help triangulate the position of the mysterious missing planet.

www.theocelot.co.uk

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Bassett

The

Rivers Scary news for scary times...

Echo

Free Brussel Sprout for every reader

Council meeting hot air to be used for new gas to energy plant

by Kit Chentable

A NEW ‘Hot Air To Energy’ plant is to be built in Bassett Rivers powered by council meetings and every time a local politician opens his or her mouth.

The ‘HATE’ plant will be built on the former site of the Bassett Rivers fungal foot cream factory which went bankrupt last year after a report revealed that cream made from fungal feet was not a healthy replacement to cream created from the fatty part of milk.

A council spokesperson said: “The average council meeting produces seven metric tonnes of hot air

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especially if they’re debating a hot button issue like the one last year when Mrs Mason wanted to build a new conservatory.

“Councillors like to hear the sound of their own voices so we thought that it would be a good idea to fit a filtration unit to each politician’s mouth to capture the ‘hot air’ that is emitted and what we’ve discovered is that one private entertainment licensing committee meeting can produce enough gas to power the whole of Bassett Rivers for a month.

“The hot air is then pumped through a system of pipes to the new facility where it is converted using state of the art ‘hot air’

conversion techiques into heat that is used to generate electricity that is then pumped straight into the national grid.”

This is the next step in the council’s goal in trying to be 100% energy efficient by the year 2020 with other steps including getting rid of fortnightly bin collections altogether with residents asked to throw all their rubbish into one big bin created on The Green which is then broken down to create a carbon like substance which is then burnt in an incinerator to heat one sunbed for one day a year at the Bassett Rivers Beauty Salon on TOWIE Street.

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After shave ad banned for actually making sense Bassett Rivers MP Bane ‘Drive-by’ Bullet’s monthly Column

By Livi Ngroom AN ADVERT for after shave featuring a normal looking man putting on after shave and then being told by his plain girlfriend that he smells good has been banned for making too much sense.

The advert for ‘Smell by Eve Saint Lawrence’ was screened during Friday’s I’m A Celebrity With Talent Get Me On The X-Factor and was immediately pulled after receiving thousands of complaints from viewers.

One viewer Ivor Pointofview, of Bassett Rivers, said: “We expect our perfume and after shave adverts to be completely nonsensical and make no sense at all. Where was the weird operatic music over the top of the advert? Where were the swans or people wearing funny costumes?

“The people were also all too normal looking. They should have unattainable beauty that makes us all hate ourselves as lesser human beings.

“On top of all this it wasn’t even pretentious at all. Where were all the celebrities making deep meaningless statements?

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“I don’t know if you remember that one advert where a male model says to a packed news conference: ‘I’m not going to be the man that you expect me to be anymore’ before the room collapses around him and he flounces out. We all know that he’s just talking pretentious wanky twaddle. That’s what we expect. We all know that the model won’t change anything about his life after making that statement. He’ll still be snorting coke off the body of a Lithuanian supermodel called Sasha later that night. If he really wanted to not be what is expected of him any more he should immediately storm out, drink some meth and then curl out a big poo in the street in front of a policeman.

“We like our perfume and after shave ads to make no sense at all, be pretentious and to make us feel awful. This new advert does none of that.”

Another complaining viewer Irma Abitconfused said: “I just thought it was a bit boring. It’s not as good as the Iceland ads with people eating mini banoffee pies. They’re class and something you can really aspire to.”

I iz like gettin’ well confused wiv dis Brexit ting dat everybody iz talkin’ about.

To me it iz like when me homie P Diddy Ha Ha Hum split up wiv hiz woman and he still wanted 2 access her single market despite sayin’ dat he wanted to sleep wiv ovva women.

His ex, Bianca, wuz like no way dat iz like ‘appenin’ az dat iz like well rude as it iz you dat dumped me.

It’s not fair really to compare Bianca 2 da EU az she duzzn’t ‘av 27 member statez inside her and iz not based in Brussellz but just off da Bassett Riverz High Street instead.

Anyway I wuz like talkin’ 2 dis Tory MP da ovva day who described himself as an arch-brexiteer. I tink his name wuz Hubert Poncington-Snobface or sometink.

He told me dat ‘no deal iz better dan a bad deal’ but I had to explain to him dat izn’t how ‘Deal or No Deal’ workz as Noel Edmondz like getz you to open two boxes at da end and even if you pick da wrong one you might still get 50p. If you didn’t take a deal you wuldn’t even get da 50p and dat iz definitely worse.

He liked looked at me and said dat da referendum wuz democracy and I should get over it.

I wuz quite angry at dis point az I thought he wuz dissin’ me by tellin’ me dat once someone made a decision dat we wuld ‘ave to shut up about it 4ever but if dat wuz da case den most of da debatez stuff dat I ‘av heard in parliament wuldn’t exist as most of dem are based on changin’ tings dat ‘ave gone before and dat iz how I thought democracy worked.

I tink dat maybe he wuz gettin’ a bit confused between the UK and North Korea az dat iz da type of place dat kind of stuff goes on. But den he lost interest in me, pinched a passing waitressez bottom and shouted ‘tally ho’ at a passing liberal democrat before mugging ‘im for his wallet.

No respect!

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Get Away

The Ocelot looks into responsible touism There are very few people who don’t like to travel.

Travelling is an incredible opportunity to experience different cultures, lifestyles, architecture and religions. But there are different ideas and expectations when it comes to travelling or going on holiday.

For some travelling is about diving into a complete culture shock, and for others an allinclusive paradise is the destination. Whichever one is the goal is irrelevant because what many people fail to consider is what impact they themselves have on the place they visit.

I met up for a coffee with Rosa Matheson, one of the founders of the Swindon-based charity. The charity provides Nepali women and girls with sanitary products - up until FKB’s interaction with them this is something they did not have access too. They didn’t even know that menstruation is something that every woman across the world goes through. Until now they were told it was a curse.

For the last 10 years Rosa has been travelling back to Nepal twice a year.

Working closely with Nepali communities, and engaging with many travellers and volunteers passing through, she has been noticing the ways in which tourism affects Nepal and the people who live there.

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By Claire Dukes

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Get Away “We have a responsibility to be a good tourist,” explained Rosa. “We have to think seriously about where we’re going, what we do there and what we leave behind.

“Everyone has their own travel dreams, but responsible tourism isn’t about feeding your needs off the needy – going to feel good about something you can put on your CV – because the local people and children are left with a feeling of being used.

“Often when people come to look at children in orphanages it’s like they’re a ‘tourist attraction’, just another tick box.”

The latter strikes me a little because it doesn’t sound too dissimilar to tourists visiting foreign animal sanctuaries or zoos - you know the ones where you can shamelessly ride elephants. It basically sounds like the human equivalent of cuddling a sedated tiger and feeding it milk – yes, you have solved cruelty to animals and I’m sure the picture will do well on your Instagram.

Rosa added: “We had a group of travellers come through one of the villages. After they left a young girl came up to me and said ‘Didi people come, they look at us, they want us to sing and dance, they take photos of us and say ‘smile’ and then they go away. Why do they do that?’

“If you want to volunteer that’s brilliant but go and spend a long time doing something that will make a difference – and give back to the place.

You should create a real relationship, leave a good impact with good integration.”

She explains that when travellers visit tourist hot spots the villages on the outer rims don’t actually economically benefit but are visited as more of an attraction - ‘how the other half live’ - and then left by travellers returning to their luxury cabins.

She said: “Nepalese people go on holiday in Nepal, but a lot of the time can’t afford the prices tourists are willing - or able - to pay.

‘Foreigners pay more’ they’re told.”

Her charity Freedom Kit Bags works alongside Exodus Travels to make sure locals are not neglected. Exodus have sponsored 1,000 of the eco-friendly kit bags for village women and young girls. The organisations are currently working together to build a custom-made maternity centre in a remote region to reach even more women.

It’s a fine line. Rosa has worked with many frequenting volunteers who help provide medical services through areas such as Charikot and Sindhupalchowk - still recovering from the aftermath of the earthquake in 2015 - but has also encountered people who just want to pay for a culture shock which has been marketed and sold in a pretty package.

On that note she said: “Travel with a respectful travel agent with years of giving back and years of empowering the local people.

“We never do something just once – we always go back and build a relationship.” www.freedomkitbags.org

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Get A Life The latest lifestyle trend: päntsdrunk

Words by Claire Dukes Images by Harry Bailey

It’s a safe bet that anything that comes from the Scandi regions will be snapped up quickly back in Britain - the hype of hygge being the leading example here.

In a nutshell hygge is all about living well and comfortably - indulging in shared comforting meals, curling up with warm drinks whilst wrapped in a blanket - to the point where you acknowledge a certain feeling of serenity and wellness and proceed to bask in it. Meanwhile in Finland a new lifestyle trend has wandered over by means of a new book Pantsdrunk: Kalsarikanni: The Finnish Path to Relaxation - it’s the same sort of concept the Danes have gone for but instead it’s all “drinking at home, alone, in your underwear”. Please welcome ‘päntsdrunk’.

The act is actually entitled ‘kalsarikänni’ but through the process of anglicization has been introduced to the UK as ‘päntsdrunk’, and in reality it’s something most people have been doing and excelling at for years, except now it has an official title - and granted a meaningful agenda. It states early on that “Getting wasted is NOT the goal” but snack wise “Think candy, crunchy, crispy” which includes cheese, readymade pizza, pasta with pesto (hola), and potato chips.

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Being a Finnish trend päntsdrunk doesn’t quite grasp the same connotations as someone in Britain would have it translated - I think the idea is that it’s less tragic and more empowering for those home alone of an evening. In a simple analysis it’s a win for the introverts and shameless slobs of the world, but also for people like myself - hella broke (and also prone to slobbery) - but enjoying the experience rather than wallowing in it. In some respects it’s suggestively another night of ‘Netflix and Chill’, without the ‘chill’ I presume.

Basically, it sounds like my hangover routine with the removal of needing to vomit and desire to want to kill myself because of my actions the night before that were in every way self-inflicted.

Päntsdrunk is taking the anti the approach towards hygge as it’s too “glossy”, and lagom which is the Nordic term for “just right” (in a nutshell) but according to the Fins doesn’t allow you to get too ‘silly’. What we are seemingly left with is a fullfilling evening on the sofa, in your pants, drunk but actually embracing the independence of the act. I’m in.

To reach the higher levels of knowing what it truly means to sit in your pants drunk, read the book - Pantsdrunk: Kalsarikanni: The Finnish Path to Relaxation by Miska Rantanen.

www.theocelot.co.uk

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TV

TV Tricks – How Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D is connected to the Movies

By Matthew Belcher

If you’ve been anywhere near a cinema lately, you’ve no doubt heard all about the gigantic blockbuster that is Avengers Infinity War. But have you heard of the TV series known as Agents of SHIELD? I wouldn’t blame you if you haven’t, it hasn’t been nearly as widely marketed as the movies.

I think one of the primary things that put a lot of people off watching Agents of SHIELD was they knew it was connected to the movies, but the movies didn’t seem at all connected to the TV series.

But I have been watching both the Marvel movies and Agents of SHIELD almost in synchronisation, and I’ve noticed that these two are more connected than it first appears. In fact, the TV series may actually help fill in some gaps the movies otherwise brush over.

First two connections: Avengers Assemble and Iron Man 3.

In the first episode of the first season of SHIELD, Phil Coulson, a character we all assumed to be dead, miraculously returns after being killed by Loki in Avengers Assemble. How did he return? Why? What’s he going to do now? All answered in good time through season one.

Meanwhile the experimental regeneration treatment known as Extremis from Iron Man 3 also makes a comeback, prompting Coulson to assemble a new team of personally selected SHIELD agents to tackle new threats in the world.

The next connection is with Thor: The Dark World.

I can already hear the disgruntled groans of the moviegoers who saw the second Thor film, but bear with me for a moment. Episode 8 of SHIELD has Coulson and his team dealing with the fallout of the events from Thor: The Dark

World. I’m talking about how the dark elves caused a lot of destruction to clean up. It’s a fairly insignificant part of the episode admittedly, but later on in episode 15, a much more significant connection; a prisoner from the Asgardian jails is causing trouble on Earth, after being busted free by the dark elves’ attack shown in Thor: The Dark World.

Next up is Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

This connection is a big one; because it deals with HYDRA’s resurgence and subsequent takeover of SHIELD. The events of The Winter Soldier take place pretty much at the same time as Episode 17 of SHIELD, the effects of which persist right through the the third season.

Hopefully I’ve said enough, because I’ve already spoiled most of the best parts of season 1, but for convenience sake I’ll just list the rest of the movies and episodes that share connections.

Avengers: Age of Ultron + SHIELD Season 2 Episode 20 Captain America: Civil War + SHIELD Season 3 Episode 20 Season four of SHIELD at first appears to be devoid of any crossovers with the Marvel movies, but the idea and concepts of magic introduced in Doctor Strange are explored somewhat more throughout. So it’s subtle, but not unimportant.

Speaking of which, Avengers: Infinity War is tied the last four episodes of Agents of SHIELD season five.

Overall, Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD was some of the best television entertainment I ever got, with my dedication to the movies making it only better.

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Style

Get those festival

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By Fashion Writer Gina Akers

The origins of the ‘festival look’ aren’t really based on any particular style but born from whatever was practical for such events and in fashion at the time.

What has become the classic ‘festival fashion style’,

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(usually shorts, on trend t-shirt, shirt or top with stylish wellies or canvas type trainers) has evolved from years of wearing what works.

In more recent times festival fashion has developed into a kind of refined look with more chic than shabby, and almost every high end

Edgy bold patterns are always hit at festivals. Try Frangipani Shirts (£75). www.frangipani-style.com

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label offering some kind of ‘practical’ line which would be wearable (and suitable) for festivals.

There is no doubt about it the dishevelled-but-cool festival look now has a luxury edge.

Access wi-fi at a festival with the Skyroam Solis (£129.99), a Wi-Fi hotspot and powerbank combined, from www.skyroam.com

www.theocelot.co.uk

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Style Corona and Parley for the Oceans have introduced a new Hawaiian shirt (£53). www.wslstore. com/corona.

Proceeds from each Corona Hawaiian shirt help protect our oceans.

Casetify has launched a Festival Glow in the Dark Collection www.casetify.com

Theye’s compact microfibre towel (£9.99). www.theye.co.uk

Brand Attics Only Grey Ruffle Raglan Jumper Dress £25, offers a luxury relaxed look www.brandattic.com

OppoSuits (from £64.95), are available in a large range of patterns www.opposuits.co.uk

For easy sleek style try the Cynical Storm Black Longline Logo T-shirt (£12) from Brand Attic www.brandattic.com

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Gaming Block out some time for Minecraft

By Matt J Belcher

What game is full of blocks, sold more copies than Grand Theft Auto and somehow managed to remain as popular as it was upon release? If you thought Tetris, you’d be on the right track, but I’m talking about Minecraft.

Now if you haven’t heard of Minecraft in this day and age, what kind of rock have you been hiding under for the past decade?

The game’s sold about 144 million freaking copies as of this year!

Not to mention that YouTube has been invaded by torrents of videos ranging from Minecraft Let’s Play videos to Minecraft tutorial videos. It’s borderline impossible to avoid Minecraft. (Pictured right: The classic icon for Minecraft, the Grassy Dirt block, which looks a lot like a pixelated chocolate cake coated in green icing.)

Between the two gameplay modes that I frequent, Survival Mode and Creative Mode, Minecraft never seems to get old, which may come as a surprise for a game that looks like it came out of the 90s. But hey, so what if Minecraft’s graphics don’t exactly look half as gorgeous as something like the recent Assassin’s Creed or Halo games?

Pac-Man used to be nothing but a yellow circle with a mouth floating through a black maze of blue lines chasing after square ‘dots’; low graphics didn’t stop him, it hasn’t stopped Minecraft.

Minecraft was a phenomenal success from its launch date, but from then to today there are some complaints people had about it.

So I will use my extensive knowledge and years worth of gaming experience to judge whether or

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not Minecraft has improved.

Complaint No#1: “The lack of tutorials or instructions make it very hard for beginning players to learn how to play.”

Ah yes, I remember those days, the days where I’d have to pause the game, go onto Minecraft Wiki and search for instructions on how to build something like a fence or a door. I’ll admit, this was a very valid and really annoying thing in Minecraft for a long time. But Minecraft now has another very valid and really annoying thing

to compensate; all the instructions you could need are now in-game and accessible every time you access the crafting table…and that means every time I put a block of wood on the crafting table, I’m reminded that I have enough blocks to make a wooden button (Just one block of wood in any space of the 3×3 grid, for those of you who were curious).

Complaint No#2: “The troublesome steps needed to set up multiplayer servers were a hassle.”

I imagine it probably was and maybe it still is, but I don’t play multiplayer Minecraft; I stick to single player. I can’t give much of a verdict to something I do

not use.

Complaint No#3: “Visual glitches occur periodically.”

Okay this may sound stupid, but I haven’t seen any visual glitches, let alone periodically occurring ones.

Okay, no more complaints. I have been playing Minecraft for so long now, I cannot remember a time when I didn’t play it! I can’t even remember when I first got so into it! Whether I’m farming food and battling monsters in Survival Mode, or building literally anything I can imagine in Creative Mode, I cannot help but have nothing but adoration for Minecraft.

Next year, Minecraft will be 10 years old. A whole decade has gone past, yet the game still feels and plays as fresh as it did when Markus Persson (Also known as ‘Notch’) released it in 2009.

Where will Minecraft go from here? Goodness knows!

The thing with Minecraft is it can add a plethora of new things and features every year with each update. Last I heard, the newest update will improve the oceans of Minecraft; introducing underwater plants, different kinds of seas (from tropical to arctic), coral reefs, shipwrecks, schools of fish, dolphins and turtles…all in just ONE update this summer!

I haven’t got the foggiest clue where Minecraft will go next, but I’m on-board for whatever it brings next. I can easily see Minecraft being something that will still be around way into the future.

www.theocelot.co.uk

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Brews and Eats Review: The Oxford Blue

By Ben Fitzgerald

You know what it’s like, you’re sitting in the pub having downed a couple of pints and you suddenly remember that you forgot to eat before you ventured out...

It leaves you facing some difficult decisions.

Either you announce that it’s time for food - which can throw a spanner in the works as far as the rest of the evening goes - or you try to build a full meal from whatever Ian the barman can find from behind the counter.

And let me tell you, two pickled eggs, a plate of frazzles and a scattering of dry roasted peanuts

is not a balanced meal.

However, salvation is at hand for the residents of East Oxford, thanks to the newly refurbished Oxford Blue pub.

Tucked away in Marston Street, off the famous Cowley Road, the pub pins its colours to the mast - Pizza, Pots, Pints.

It’s a simple idea done well

by Bedfordshire based brewery Charles Wells which has taken over the joint.

The stripped down interior of the

pub is bang on trend and lends the place an air of simple charm.

And while the beer is top notch, it’s the quality of the food that is drawing the punters in from far and wide.

The beautifully made pizza is hauled directly from the oven and brought to your table - thin, cripy and still smouldering - a far cry from the usual frozen microwave blasted travesty you might expect in a pub.

And the pots - describe a broiling cheese crusted dish of gloopy Macaroni.

If you’re in the area I urge you to drop by - it’s the complete evening out, it’s your one-stop-shop for fun food and good times - it’s pizza, pots and pints.

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Brews and Eats

Summer daze: avoid the pitfalls of alfresco drinking

By Darren Willmott

As the summer months reach full occupation, our thoughts naturally turn to a mid-year break where we can let our hair down, just like we did in our schooldays.

Whether you’re at home or abroad, despite the care-free holiday abandon, it’s worth remembering that staying safe with alcohol is just as important as good sunscreen or not staring directly at the sun.

Whether this is the partaking of a few beers at lunch, the house white or rosé after work, or the deeper red wines at a BBQ, responsible drinking can mean you end the day as happy as you started it. Here’s a few tips that, whether it’s a few drinks or a full-on session, can really make the difference.

1. Eat First! – We’ve probably all had ‘the munchies’ at some point, but this is your body’s way of panicking and playing catch-up because you didn’t fortify your stomach with enough food beforehand. An old myth states that drinking a pint of milk (or, disgustingly, several glugs

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of olive oil) before a session will eradicate the hangover zombies, but the pure joy of drinking Champagne with Fish n’ Chips (where the alcohol content cleanly cuts through the fat of the meal) shows that this doesn’t work and is indeed just a myth. What does work is eating a good, solid meal ahead of time, which allows the newly imbibed alcohol to be soaked up as it is taken in.

2. Watch out for the weather!

– Undeniably the sunnier weather is a wonderful time to kick back with some al fresco drinking, but it’s worth remembering that the increased temperatures have the side effect of making you dehydrate quicker through sweating.

The best move here is to adjust what you’re drinking, either staying on beer (with its lower alcohol level) or lower alcohol wines for longer. You should also compensate by ensuring that you drink a glass of water every two to three drinks. This will help your body keep its natural hydration levels and keep you going for longer.

The most important thing to

remember is to pace yourself.

Days free from work, as well as hot weekends, mean that all day drinking sessions can be on the cards. Regular drinking of water is a good way to avoid peaking too early.

3. Ignore Peer Pressure! – This isn’t about killing the fun by turning down the extra glass, shot or cocktail, but more about the pressure of ‘the round’.

If you’re in session mode there is the temptation to keep up with the pace of your mates and the regular rounds of drink, which may happen more often than you’re used to, or need. Keep a count of what you are drinking to help put things in perspective.

Even worse can be the thought of skipping a round and not making your money back. However in most public places, ordering a soft drink instead of an alcoholic one will invariably be more expensive anyway!

Cheers!

Read Darren’s blog at vinesight. me

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Brews and Eats

Battle of the Breweries With Brewery Bird

Ten, fifteen years ago, you might have struggled to find a Mocha Chocolate Marshmallow & Mango IPA in a bottle, let alone on a bar, unless you were in a hip n’ happening Portland microbrewery bar. Portland, Oregon, that is.

But today, it’s a whole different ball-game. In 2000, there were around 500 breweries in the UK, today, it’s over 2000 and growing – a new microbrewery opens every THREE days!! Owning a micro-brewery used to be considered a pipedream by many, now it’s almost commonplace.

This phenomenal growth is due in part to the introduction of the Small Brewers Relief which was introduced in 2002 to help breweries producing under 60,000 hectolitres a year (around 10 million pints) establish themselves and compete with the much larger producers e.g. the likes of Greene King, Marstons, Sharps.

The system works on a sliding

scale so brewers currently producing under 5000 hectolitres (approx. 880,000 pints) receive a 50% annual discount off their annual beer duty rates. Every little helps as they say!

Beer Duty change However, over the past year or so, a number of the larger producers, (around 60) have made it clear that they would like to see this 50% discount restricted to those brewers producing only 1000 hl a year or under. (equating to around 2444 casks – meaning the average 20 barrel micro-brewery could only brew approx. twice a week throughout the year), and the upper limit at which brewers receive relief raised to 200,000hl.

They argue that since 2002, the number of medium sized breweries has reduced by 40%, effectively squeezed out of the market by the influx of much smaller breweries who they claim have had such an impact on market share that a reform is necessary to “reduce market

distortion, encourage breweries to grow in size and sustain the cask ale market”.

Many of these smaller breweries fear that such a reform would impact the brewing industry by drastically limiting the choice of beer available to drinkers - as many would simply go out of business – as well as probable price increases industry wide.

And despite many of the bigger breweries having their own tiedestate pubs, not to mention very well-established brands, the main issue is obviously a deep-seated fear of losing out further on the market share of free-trade potential.

Supporters of the reform insist that such change is not about eliminating the competition, but creating a level playing field for a wider spectrum of smaller breweries. Whatever the outcome, it would seem even tougher times are ahead for the brewing industry, regardless of size.

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Brews and Eats

Review: The Wild Duck Inn

By Ben Fitzgerald

The Wild Duck Inn is tucked away in the leafy lanes of Ewen in the Cotswolds - all grey slates, slanted doorways and ancient

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oak beams.

Ducking our way into the dimly lit interior our party of three was shown to a table where we were

offered water and bread without any sense that we were being a colossal inconvenience - this was an excellent sign.

The lunchtime menu seemed to focus on traditional British grub, but with a sideways slant - for example Duck Shepherd’s Pie. We ordered Scotch egg, sausage roll and croquettes for starters.

Now I appreciate a Scotch egg as much as the next punter - but this thing had been re-invented from the ground up.

No orange breadcrumbs, grey ‘meat’ and rubbery egg here..

Making the first incision, runny yolk oozed out all over the place - I think I actually said ‘Wow!’ - I don’t normally talk to my food, it just happened.

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Brews and Eats

The sausage roll also stretched the definition of the genre - with a thin crust of pasty wrapped around an amazing looking sausage the girth of a bottle of wine; and as for the croquetes they were a gloopy intense experience of cheesy pleasure, and there is no finer form of pleasure than that. This was

rapidly followed by the mains - I went for Chalk Stream trout with fennel, Jersey Royals and salsa verde.

The others went for Pan fried calves liver with mashed potato, streaky bacon, sage and onion; and duck shepherds pie with spring greens and root vegetables.

The trout was stunning, I don’t know if the fact that it had been hauled out of a chalk stream had any bearing on this or the fact that it had been expertly seared and boned so that the skin was crunchy and delicious.

The faintly aniseed of the fennel and Jersey Royals shook hands with the salsa verde and the whole lot got on like a house on fire.

As for the liver, my dining companion enthused: “Usually you get liver chopped, but this was the whole thing, cooked to perfection. It was a ‘proper bit of meat’ really tender and full of flavour, it was just a good solid piece of meat which I loved.”

And as for the duck shepherd’s pie?: “It was lovely and rich. It sounded stranger than it was. But it was really nice.

The duck was tender and I would have it again, very homely and comforting. It was exactly what I would want on a menu in a British Pub. Completely filling and flavoursome.

Address: Drakes Island, Cirencester GL7 6BY Tel: 01285 770310 www.theluckyonion.com/property/ the-wild-duck-inn

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Brews and Eats

A history of crisps

By Ben Fitzgerald

Thursd

THEAT Times

Sunda

CONC 6pm -

FAMILY 2.30p

Tuesd

THEAT Times

Wedne

THEAT 2pm -

THEAT 8pm -

THEAT 8pm -

Thursd

FAMILY Times

Thursd

CONC 7pm -

THEAT 7.30p

Crisps are amazing.

Whoever invented them must have stood back, placed his hands on his hips in a slightly camp way and nodded quietly to himself - rather like Pharaoh Khufu must have done when the final pointy bit was placed on top of the great pyramid of Giza.

If you think about it, transforming a slightly dank and slimy root vegetable into a golden flavour-packed disk of joy is a form of foodie alchemy.

The earliest known recipe for crisps comes to us courtesy of William Kitchiner’s The Cook’s Oracle which was published in 1817.

On page 104 he describes how potato slices or shavings can be fried in lard to produce a knock-out snack ideal for stuffing your face with while looking out of a window waiting for television to be invented.

The humble potato chip, whilst being revolutionary, was still at the beginning of its evolutionary journey towards the apex of stack development which has now reached its zenith in the form of the pickled onion flavoured Monster Munch.

With the invention of cellophane, crisps could became a mass market product and, interestingly, crisps are now packaged in plastic bags and filled with nitrogen gas to keep them fresh for longer.

But it was the crazy Irish who came up with the idea of flavouring crisps so that they tasted of something else other than crisps. The Tayto crisp company hit the ground running by wheeling out both Cheese and Onion and Salt n’ Vinegar onto the post war fun-free streets of the United Kingdom in the 1950s - flicking a switch in the brains of

anyone who ate them - opening the doors of perception and freaking them the heck out.

Suddenly this austire black and white world was filled with colour, and sex and hope and weird flavours - which today range from the ambitious Roast Ham and Cranberry to the ambitious Firecracker Lobster.

There is seemingly no end to this snack revolution, with various far-sighted visionaries taking the basic premise of cutting up a thing and then deep frying it and running with it. And now we have a profusion of pretenders to the snack crown, with Pringles locked in a fight to the death with Twiglets and Chipsticks.

You know, it’s strange to think that there are children alive today who can’t recall world before Frazzles.

If that’s not progress I don’t know what is...

THEAT 7.30p

CONC 7.30p

Friday

THEAT 7.30p

Friday

CONC 7.30p

LADIES 7.30p

CONC 8pm -

Saturd

THEAT Times

Saturd

CONC 7.30p

COME 7.30p

DANC 7.30p

Tuesd

COME

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Theatre List

Thursday June 21 to Saturday July 21

Check times - Oxford Playhouse

THEATRE: Jerusalem Times vary - Watermill Theatre, Newbury

TALK: Dan Snow - An Evening with 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

THEATRE: Wayfaring Times Vary - Corn Exchange, Newbury

Sunday July 1

Wednesday July 11

Tuesday July 17

CONCERT: Wantage Band in Concert 6pm - Cornerstone Arts, Didcot

CONCERT: Burt Bacharach 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford

THEATRE: Oxford Improvisors 7.45pm - Old Fire Station, Oxford

FAMILY: Beauty & The Beast Jr 2.30pm and 6pm - Old Fire Station, Oxford

COMEDY: Griff Rhys Jones - Where Was I? 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

Wednesday July 18 to Saturday July 21

Tuesday July 3 to Thursday July 5

THEATRE: Quirky Bird Presents 8pm - Swindon Arts Centre

THEATRE: Wilkes Academy Showcase Times vary - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Wednesday July 4 THEATRE: Sirens 2pm - Cornerstone Arts, Didcot THEATRE: Hickory Dickory Murder 8pm - Old Fire Station, Oxford THEATRE: Read College Showcase 8pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury Thursday July 5 to Saturday July 7 FAMILY: What the Moon Saw Times Vary - Corn Exchange, Newbury Thursday July 5 CONCERT: Hits from the Blitz 7pm - Cornerstone Arts, Didcot THEATRE: Beneath the Blue Rinse 7.30pm - Old Fire Station, Oxford THEATRE: Everybody’s Talking About Jamie 7.30pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury CONCERT: The Carpenters Story 7.30pm - Cornerstone Arts, Didcot Friday July 6 to Saturday July 7 THEATRE: Fred, Ted, Jack & Harold 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre, Devizes Rd Friday July 6 CONCERT: The Bon Jovi Experience 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon LADIES NIGHT: The Dreamboys 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford CONCERT: ‘Jive Talking’ 8pm - Neeld Arts Centre, Chippenham Saturday July 7 to Sunday July 8 THEATRE: Les Miserables Times Vary - Neeld Arts Centre, Chippenham Saturday July 7 CONCERT: Abba Mania 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford COMEDY: Mark Thomas 7.30pm - Old Fire Station, Oxford DANCE: Teresa’s School of Dance 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Tuesday July 10 COMEDY: Michael Palin & Sally Phillips

Thursday July 12 TALK: An Evening with Sir Ranulp Fiennes 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford

Tuesday July 17 to Saturday July 21

THEATRE: Blewbury Players - Lark Rise Times Vary - Cornerstone Arts, Didcot Wednesday July 18 COMEDY: Danny Baker 7.30pm - Salisbury City Hall Thursday July 19 to Saturday July 21

THEATRE: Where the Hell is Bernard?

8pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot

THEATRE: The Wedding Singer Times Vary - Swindon Arts Centre

CONCERT: Pop Up Opera Presents Mozart Double Bill 7.30pm - Neeld Arts Centre, Chippenham

DANCE: Dance Connection: You Can Fly Times Vary - Cornerstone Arts, Didcot

CONCERT: Retake That 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon THEATRE: No Kids 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury Friday July 13 COMEDY: Corn Exchange Comedy Club 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury CONCERT: Skipinnish 8pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot Saturday July 14 DANCE: Encompass 5pm & 10pm - Arlington Arts, Newbury THEATRE: ODF Presents 7.30pm - Old Fire Station, Oxford CABARET: Psychic Night with Nikki Kitt 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre CONCERT: Sun Records - The Concert 7.30pm - New Theatre, Oxford Sunday July 15 THEATRE: Razzamataz Theatre School Check Time - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury THEATRE: The Next Stage 7.30pm - Salisbury City Hall Monday July 16 to Saturday July 21 THEATRE: Birdsong Times Vary - Oxford Playhouse Monday July 16 to Sunday July 29 THEATRE: Shakespeare at the Bodleian Times Vary - The Bodleian Library, Oxford Monday July 16 DANCE: Ace Dance Company 7pm - Arlington Arts Centre, Newbury DANCE: Lydiard Park Academy Dancers 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon

Friday July 20 to Saturday July 21 THEATRE: Pretty Polly’s Dead Times Vary - BT Studio at Oxford Playhouse Friday July 20 CONCERT: Rocket Man - Elton John Tribute 7.30pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Saturday July 21 DANCE: Fitzgraham Academy of Dance Times Vary - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon GHOSTS: Haunt Ghost Night Check time - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford CONCERT: UK Pink Floyd Experience 7.45pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury Wednesday July 25 THEATRE: Thor & Loki 7.30pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Newbury Thursday July 26 to Saturday Sept15 THEATRE: Sweet Charity Times Vary - Watermill Theatre, Newbury Thursday July 26 CONCERT: The ELO Experience 7.30pm - Salisbury City Hall CONCERT: Ed Gamble 8pm - Cornerstone Arts, Didcot COMEDY: Mark Steel 8pm - Wyvern Theatre, Swindon Friday July 27 to Saturday July 28 THEATRE: No Kids 7.30pm - North Wall Arts Centre, Oxford Friday July 27 CONCERT: Police Tribute 8pm - Cornerstone Arts Centre, Didcot Saturday July 28 THEATRE: Of Rags and Bones 7pm - Corn Exchange, Newbury

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Barn Theatre

Award-winning plays in the Cotswolds: The Barn Theatre Words by Claire Dukes

Adding to Cirencester’s arts and culture is a newly revamped theatre in the heart of the Cotswolds: The Barn Theatre.

Under the team of professional directors, producers, writers and actors The Barn Theatre is just about to end its inaugural season with their third production The Rise and fall of Little Voice. Based on the award-winning play and film this production provides another

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refreshing twist on an acclaimed classic following on from the theatre’s previous productions of The Secret Garden and One Minute - both of which The Ocelot has been delighted to attend.

You’d think that having started from the ground up that it could be a slow start onto the theatre scene for The Barn Theatre, but as I found out it’s quite the opposite. Within their first three

shows the theatre is demonstrating relentless versatility through story choice, limitless creativity with set design, and a desire to enrich Cirencester’s cultural scene through thought-provoking theatre.

I don’t think I only speak for myself when I say I’m looking forward to The Rise and fall of Little Voice and what this dynamic team have coming up next.

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Barn Theatre

Inside the actors’ corner

Ahead of opening night for The Rise and Fall of Little Voice, The Ocelot spoke to the play’s leading actors Michael Strassen and Sarah Louise Hughesin for an insight into what to expect from the closing show of The Barn Theatre’s inaugural season.

What drew you to audition for The Rise and Fall of Little Voice?

SH: The director came to my showcase and invited me to audition for the show. However, I did know the play as I had used the final monologue for my auditions for drama school. It’s always lovely when directors bother to come and see graduation talent.

The story is a classic in both film and theatre – what will this production be doing to breathe fresh life into it?

MS: I think society contact wise has shifted a lot since it was written. I think audiences will more readily identify with Little Voice’s grief and trauma. This isn’t the story about a shy girl who happens to be able to sing like Judy Garland, this is a story about a young woman trying to find a voice within the pressure cooker of her home environment.

Has this rendition of the play taken a classic or contemporary approach?

MS: I have set the play firmly when it was written.

Any addition of modern Internet or other social pressures would I think change Little Voice’s story profoundly. Isolation here is the key.

SH: I think that if we set the play now Little Voice would have her own YouTube channel, and have the added pressure of internet trolls, so I think that it is

important to set the show pre-internet.

Do you have an extensive history in theatre?

In comparison to other mediums why have you chosen to take to the stage?

MS: Theatre is the most vital of the arts. There is nothing like a live theatre audience to let you know how you are doing.

SH: I have just signed with an agent who deals in film, TV and theatre. I can’t think of a better platform than live theatre to start my career.

Why should people come and see The Rise and Fall of Little Voice?

SH: Please come and let me know whether or not I have made the right career choice [laughs]!

MS: I can guarantee belly laughs at the antics of this dysfunctional family but also a few tears, hopefully.

It is a very emotional piece.

It’s the closing show to the inaugural season! How are you feeling about the production?

MS: I think it is the perfect choice to close the season.

The Rise and Fall of Little Voice has every theatrical element in it, joy, laughter, tears, and maybe a little lesson for us all. It has been a diverse season. I think ‘The Rise and Fall of Little Voice’ sits somewhere between ‘The Secret Garden’ and ‘One Minute’.

The Rise and Fall of Little Voice will be on at The Barn Theatre from July 7 to August 4. For further information and to buy tickets visit www. barntheatre.org.uk

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Advertise here for as little as ÂŁ99 plus VAT per month (if you kind of suck up to us a bit and take a campaign. Know what I mean... wink wink, nudge, nudge)

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Devizes Festival Fortnight

Devizes is ready for the ultimate carnival August 19 to September 1

Words by Claire Dukes

Devizes is preparing for a carnival fortnight of unmissable events as part of DOCA (Devizes Outdoor Celebratory Arts) next month.

This year includes the usual suspects including Devizes International Street Festival, Carnival Parade and Confetti Battle. As always DOCA concocts something new to bring to the carnival celebrations - marking 100 years since the end of World War DOCA has put together a series of installations to commemorate the date.

For further information visit www.docadevizes.org.uk

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Devizes Festival Fortnight DOCA highlights

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DEVIZES CARNIVAL September 1

3

STREET FESTIVAL August 26 to 27

Forever making a 2km walk fun, this year Devizes Carnival is themed around ecosystems and nature.

Awards will go to best costume, most innovative, best in category and overall winner. Don’t forget to register!

Think theatre, music, circus acts, and dancers to mark 250 years of the modern circus! Acts include Ragroof Players, Cia El Cruce, Duo Looky and My!Laika. An army of ale, cider and food stalls will also be out in force.

5

PICNIC IN THE PARK 19 August

The best kind of picnic is the one guaranteed to have live music throughout! This year the park will also be displaying a World War I installation, as well as all-welcome workshops ahead of the carnival.

2

DEVIZES CONFETTI BATTLE - August 29

The best part about this event is that it’s a tradition in Devizes which brings hundreds of people to the Market Place. A special guest is to be announced, but a fairground and sea of colour is guaranteed.

4

MY!LAIKA – POPCORN MACHINE - August 24 to 27

An unmissable show of theatre, Dadaistic humour, kunst-cirque (art circus) and live music. “A Dadaist cabaret of meticulously orchestrated chaos. Loco, loco, loco!” - El Pais.

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FESTIVAL QUIZ NIGHT August 22

Perfect for competitive types, and those people you know who have an unlimited flair for general knoweldge, the festival quiz night helps raise funds for DOCA’s future and upcoming events.

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Henley Festival

Black ties, flowing dres

Welcome to Hen

Henley Festival, which bills itself as the UK’s most glamorous boutique festival returns to its spectacular setting along the river in Henley-onThames from 11-15th July 2018.

As the UK’s only black-tie boutique festival, Henley Festival is glamour personified, offering Michelin starred food, award winning comedians, Turner Prize nominated artists and the biggest names in popular, world, jazz and classical music. Following the release of her long-awaited album in Spring 2018, Rita Ora will open Henley Festival on the Wednesday night. Thursday will see one of the world’s most iconic women, Grace Jones bring her daring and original set to the festival’s iconic Floating Stage. And on Friday, music legend Nile Rodgers & Chic will delight festival-goers with a generous helping of stone cold funk and disco classics.

On Saturday night, Curtis Stigers and the The Ronnie Scott’s Big Band

will present ‘Sinatra At The Sands’ with a guest appearance from Rob Brydon. And finally, on Sunday evening, the English National Opera will bring the festival to an unforgettable close.

Festival-goers can also enjoy an all-star comedy line-up, featuring Phill Jupitus, Paul Merton, Lucy Porter and Mark Watson, as well as world-class jazz, swing, world, and folk music, and gastronomic food, with Michelin starred Angela Hartnett starring as this year’s headline chef alongside a huge number of restaurants, pop ups and bars.

Audiences will also be treated to an exciting array of impromptu street theatre and cabaret performances each evening, including acoustic music performances in the Bedouin tent, art installations, and fireworks.

For more information on the lineup visit: www.henley-festival.co.uk

Phill Jupitus on crowds, downsizing and life after Red Wedge What do you do when you are not being Phill Jupitus the comedian?

I suppose on stage I’m an exaggerated version of myself but it’s still who I am. I’m very much myself on stage, I’m not pretending to be anyone else. I do recall meeting another comedian backstage a number of years ago and when I tried talking to him he said ‘please don’t speak to me I’m getting into character’ - I think that if you are not able to speak to people you have no place being in this business.

It really is part of the job. I’ve never really understood people who have to be someone else on stage.

Being a comedian is more of a

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calling than a job.

What can we expect when you take to the stage at Henley?

I’ve been touring since September and I have been doing a three hour show - so when I come to Henley I’m down to do a 45-minute set - I really enjoy doing these festivals, everyone’s in a relaxed mood and out to have fun - it’s great to spend time in a tent having a laugh with people, it’s really not like hard work to me. Yes it’s a far cry from Red Wedge that I was part of in the 80s, but I suppose I’ve changed, the landscape’s changed - that’s the nature of progress.

Have we reached peak Phill?

Well, peak Phill was a few years ago now - when I was doing Never Mind the Buzzcocks - I’m certainly not recognised in the street to the same extent now, which is actually how I like it. I’m sort of downsizing.

I did dabble with musicals a while ago but they are a huge amount of work. There is a certain level of fame which you feel duty bound to achieve but I’m at the level where I’m really enjoying the work I do.

I’m looking forward to Henley - there’s nothing I enjoy more than chatting to a crowd who are clearly there to enjoy themselves, it should be a lot of fun.

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Henley Festival

resses and classy music

Henley Festival

What happens when platinum selling soul sensations grow up?

Ben Fitzgerald spoke to power ballard sensation turned jazz crooner Curtis Stigers ahead of his performance with Ronnie Scott’s Big Band.

“Are you actually calling me from Swindon?” he says...

I must confess I was a little taken aback. I’m calling Curtis Stigers on a remarkably clear phone line from his home in Boise, Idaho.

And the first thing he asks me is about Swindon - in almost reverential tones. Turns out that the town has stuck in his mind after he paid a brief visit a few years - playing at the Swindon Arts Centre in Old Town.

“Is there still a Mexican restaurant next door to the Art Centre?” he presses. (There isn’t - it’s since become a rather good Nepalese restaurant) I was sitting there having some food on my own after the show; I was the only one in there until another couple came in. I couldn’t believe my eyes… ‘you’re fucking Andy Partridge from XTC!’ I said. I’m a huge fan. How crazy is that?”

Curtis Stigers is one grounded cat - far removed from the unapproachable floppy haired mega star pouting on the cover of his 1991 eponymous multi-platinum album.

He even answers his own phone I know it’s a small thing but normally with these high profile interviews you would expect a PR intermediary to be there to say something useful like ‘Curtis is ready to speak to you now’.

Does he miss that level of mega stardom?

“It was wonderful at the time but you can’t spend your life like that. It’s very easy to lose track of

reality. They were great times and I got to perform in front of huge crowds and meet my heroes like Eric Clapton, Elton John and Prince. But I wouldn’t want to be stuck in the back of a tour bus now - these days I like to keep it low key.”

As a youngster, Curtis was exposed to a wide range of music: “I was listening to everything from Led Zeppelin to Sinatra but I did go to college to study Jazz - so I do have some form of academic training.”

And while Curtis has explored many different musical avenues in his career, it’s to jazz that he habitually returns.

In 2001 Curtis threw his lot in with the Concord Jazz label, effectively reinventing himself as a jazz crooner and embarking on a series of tours with a tight quartet and playing in intimate venues and a string of albums. However when he tours in England later this month he will be teaming up with a big band to perform a programme of Sinatra standards.

“This all came out of a show that I

did in Denmark where I was singing songs from the classic Sinatra at the Sands album - I’d had a few Danish beers and I got up on stage and did my thing, thinking nothing about it afterwards. But then a recording emerged and when I listened back to it, I thought it sounded really good and we turned it into an album. So now we’ve been touring the album. When I play in Henley I will be working with the Ronnie Scott’s Big Band - they’re amazing, I’m really looking forward to it.”

When not out touring, Curtis is keeping it real, having moved back to his hometown of Boise Idaho when his daughter was three - she’s now 18 and getting ready to fly the nest.

“Different things are important to me now I guess. I’ve seen plenty of people in my industry lose sight of what’s real and what’s not. I’d like to think that I have never been like that, I’ve always tried to keep a grip on what’s important.”

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Swindon Shuffle

This year’s Shuffle has its best line-up yet

Swindon Shuf

Words by Claire Dukes

Swindon Shuffle returns this month for another four-day takeover of local talent.

From Thursday July 12 to Sunday July 15 bands and solo artists will be taking over Swindon’s music venues and watering holes. As per usual the line-up is a glorious combination of familiar faces and up and coming artists - and it’s completely free to attend.

This year Swindon Shuffle will be supporting Swindon Mind - a local mental health charity who do incredible work to support people battling mental health issues. This

chosen charity in particular also looks to raise awareness of mental health issues within the music industry - donation buckets will be available at every venue.

Each year Swindon Shuffle has been growing in size and bringing more and more variety to the stages across town - over four days there will be over 40 artists playing across five venues.

I am incredibly excited for this year’s Shuffle because the line-up is looking like it’s the best yet.

Granted this will be my first time attending the Shuffle, but despite

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briefly migrating I’ve always kept my eye on it. This year I am delighted to see some acts on the list which I’ve seen growing over the last year or two which I highly recommend - shout out to The Harlers, Flour Babies, Hip Route, Grasslands, Canute’s Plastic Army and SexJazz. That being said I am more than curious to see some acts new on my radar including SN Dubstation, Tamsin Quin, Slagerji, Palm Rose, The Oxymora, and ‘special guests’.

For the full line-up visit www.swindonshuffle.co.uk

The venues: The Victoria, The Tuppenny, The Castle, The Beehive, and Baila www.theocelot.co.uk

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Swindon Shuffle

huffle 2018 5

@swindonshuffle

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SN Dustation - July 13, The Castle Eight-piece ska and reggae band - these guys come highly rated. I’m thinking Hypnotic Brass Ensemble meets The Specials.

Flour Babies - July 12, The Castle Shoegazing synths with raw guitar riffs - Flour Babies are a post-punk sensation with dejecting lyrics. One for Pixies fans.

Palm Rose - July 14, The Victoria I saw their first live set and I’m completely sold on seeing them again. Ones to watch for a hypnotic session of indie dream pop!

The Oxymora - July 13, The Victoria New music alert: this will be the band’s first live performance, bringing fresh material onto the grunge and alt-rock scene.

The Harlers - July 13, The Victoria They get more polished with every show a band that’s very much on their way. You’d be a fool to miss a free set.

Tamsin Quin - July 12, The Tuppenny Tamsin is the antidote to riotous sweaty bands - a sombre and intimate show of harmonious folk and blues songs. Bliss.

SexJazz - July 14, The Beehive My favourite reprobates - an infectious fusion of psychedelia and punk. Always high energy, always a great show.

Emily-Jane Sheppard - July 15, The Tuppenny A duo that combines “spellbinding vocals and a delicate yet dynamic use of acoustic guitar.”

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August 3rd, 4th, 5th 2018

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3 days of great music on a rural Organic Wiltshire farm Swindon’s only Small, Funky, Cool Festival on an Organic farm. It’s small cos we like it that way, but that’s not to say we don’t have Amazing Bands, Great Food and Great Beer Located next to our Organic Farm Shop in Purton

This Year’s Acts include

FRIDAY: BINOMIAL - 80's Synth Pop Re-Imagined PENFOLD and HOOCH Party Hits plus 90's Classics SATURDAY: The GO GO FIVE An Explosive Mix of Motown, 60's Soul, Jazz, Blues and Rock and Roll!

DISTANT ECHOES - A Tribute to The JAM SUNDAY: VICE VERSA - Indie Rock from the 70's to Today Marc Hopkins as ROBBIE WILLIAMS plus many more...

NEW FOR THIS YEAR COMEDY from Mirth Control For info and tickets, please visit: www.festivalonthefarm.co.uk Ocelot 145.indd 36

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Cornbury

Cornbury Festival Words by Claire Dukes

July 13 to July 15 The Great Tew Park, Oxfordshire

There was a brief fear that Cornbury Festival wouldn’t see another year, but thankfully that’s not the case.

In fact it’s gone from nearly closing its doors to hosting a line-up of critically acclaimed musicians - Alanis Morissette, UB40 and Amy McDonald to name a few - accompanied by a menu crafted by the nation’s favourite hairy chefs - Dave Myers and Si King.

Announcing one hell of a comeback Cornbury Music Festival founder, Hugh Phillimore, wrote: “I’ve been humbled by the strength of feeling for Cornbury and I’ve realised that I should keep it going as a worthwhile community gathering.” www.cornburyfestival.com

The Hairy Bikers bring a Festival Feast On top of a musical line-up for festival goers to feast their eyes on, this year The Hairy Bikers will be hosting a ‘Pop Up Woody Fired Restaurant’ throughout the weekend.

Diners will have to book a place at the festival feast inspired by the duo’s latest cookbook The Hairy Bikers Mediterranean Adventure - we’re talking wood fired chicken, couscous, roasted aubergne, and all the lentils. Proper nice festival grub. There’s a sample menu available to view online.

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Truck

Are you ready for Truck Festival? July 2022to July Words by Claire Dukes

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It’s time - Truck Festival is just weeks, soon to be days, away and is back this year with a ridiculously insane line-up.

For 2018 Truck Festival has brought in some major players for the headlining acts with the likes of De La Soul, Friendly Fires, Editors, Courteeners, and We Are Scientists (aka the teen dream playlist). But running not so far behind is an entourage of acts quickly on the rise from Oxford - Low Island, Little Brother Eli and Mother - and also musicians making waves from further afield - Black Honey and Girli.

Combined together this ensemble has basically made Truck unmissable this year - a festival which is renowned for bringing a weekend of high quality music to Oxford. Hopefully see you there! www.truckfestival.com

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www.theocelot.co.uk

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Festival on the Farm If you go down to the farm this summer you’re bound to bump into some bloody good music...

Mayhem at the farm...

The line-up for this year’s Festival on the Farm is looking pretty damn good so far.

And we’ll be there with bells on (cowbells obvs).

The festival, which takes place at Purton Organics from Friday August 3 to Sunday August 5, also includes loads for the family to do from face painting and a fun fair to loads of delicious food. Under 12s go free which is a total bargain.

On the Friday they’ve got the ever brilliant Penfold and Hooch doing their thing as well as brilliant bands The Dirty Smooth and Raze*Rebuild (the band that is known for making things difficult for us journalists by having a ‘*’ in their name). Headlining the opening night will be Binomial with a bit of electronica

goodness from Kraftwerk to the Pet Shop Boys.

Then on the Saturday they have our favourite and most original Swindon band of the moment Sexjazz as well as The Rotten Aces, The Blind Lemon Blues Band, Magician’s Nephew and headlining the evening will be The Go Go Five - an explosive mix of motown, 60’s soul, jazz, rock and blues.

On the Sunday, if you have survived the mayhem of Saturday (and after watching Sexjazz you might be mayhemed out), there’s Marc as Robbie Williams and Vice Versa closing down what looks set to be the best Festival on the Farm ever.

Check out the line-up and get updates and tickets at: www.festivalonthefarm.co.uk

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Music News

Halfway to Seventy-Five 2018 A festival in Oxford dedicated to ‘Americana, roots and good music’ at Oxford’s Isis Farmhouse, Saturday July 28 to Sunday July 29 a celebration of folk, country and blues.

This year the line-up includes Speedbuggy USA, The Vagabond, Rachel Laven, The Rosellys, The Deadbeat Apostles, Bennett Wilson Poole and many more. Essentially, it’s a chilled out weekend listening to the harmonising melodies of South America whilst sipping on some beers and gorging on some honest food in the countryside. Splendid.

For the full line-up visit www.halfwayto75.com

Free music in the park this summer in Salisbury Salisbury City Council will be hosting free Music in the Park events at Queen Elizabeth Gardens this summer.

The line-up this summer starts on Sunday 8 July with Innervision – a five piece cover band playing energetic chart music for all ages.

This will be followed on Sunday 22 July by Salisbury Big Band, where you can enjoy the great swing and jazz sounds of the mid – 20th century.

The concerts continue on Sunday 5 August with Tom & The Clementynes – a three piece band playing rock and pop classics with modern anthems

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thrown in to entertain all generations.

The last of the concert series will finish on Sunday 19 August with The Treblemakers - a top

quality covers band specialising in 50s classics to present day.

All the Music in the Park events take place in Queen Elizabeth Gardens from 2-4pm.

www.theocelot.co.uk

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Music News

Get your rocks off at Avebury!

Festial fans can get their fix of mystical magical vibes and also enjoy some great live music when the Avebury Rocks Music Festial opens at the end of the month.

The event is a celebration of all forms of wonderful live music, from rock to folk and everything in-between.

All proceeds from Avebury Rocks go towards supporting the care and services provided by local charity Prospect Hospice.

Avebury Rocks was the inspiration of locally-born musician Nick Harper as a way to give something back to Prospect Hospice, the local hospice who provided care for his late mother. Nick, with the help of David Uttley and the original organising committee, set out to find a talented and willing group of musicians who would happily perform in a field in Wiltshire,

Get ready to Stomp on the Shire

Put a note in your diary for the Stomp on the Shire festival taking place at the end of the month.

The event takes place on July 27 & 28 in Hindon near Salisbury and promises an amazing two days of music, across three stages.

Among the acts taking part are The Tribe, Funke and the Two Tone Baby, Bare Jams, IDestroy, SN Dubstation.

Advance tickets priced at £50 are available from www.stompontheshire. eventbee.com/boxoffice

next to the famous standing stones of Avebury. Eight years later they’re still going strong!

The festival features an eclectic line-up of local and national artists over two stages, and we champion those making

new and original music.

The event runs over the weekend of 27-29 July and features a host of local artists.

For more information and to book tickets log on to http:// aveburyrocksfestival.net/

Latin rhythms to set pulses racing Riamba makes a welcome return to The Pound in Corsham with their upbeat Latin music incorporating Cuban classics, sizzling jazz improvisation and relaxed Brazilian Bossa Novas.

The seven-piece line up of leading figures from the World music

and jazz scene in London come together to create a unique blend of music for lovers of Latin dance and jazz.

Riamba will visit the Pound on Saturday 7 July. Tickets £14.

For more information visit www. poundarts.org.uk

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Music News Sunday July 1

9pm - The Bell, Bicester

Sound Affects 6.30pm - The Castle Inn, Swindon

Dirty Jack 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

The Black Wood Redeemers 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon

The Daybreakers 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon

Monday July 2

Sunday July 8

All Welcome Night 8pm - The Lamb Inn, Devizes

The Model Folk 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon

Wednesday July 4

Monday July 9

Wacky Wednesday 7.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Thornbridge 8pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham

Thursday July 5

Wednesday July 11

Oli Brown 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Wacky Wednesday 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Open Mic and Promo Night 8pm - Half Moon, Oxford

Thursday July 12

Hells Gazelles 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Billy Branch + Giles Robson 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford

Port Erin 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon

Singers’ Night 8pm - The Cellar Bar, Bradford on Avon

Hooch 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Plugged-in Singers’ Night 8pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham Ten Tombs 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Ian Kenna 6pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon Friday June 6 Super Hans 7pm - O2 Academy 2, Oxford The Americans 7pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Alkahest 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon Coda - A Tribute to Led Zeplin 8pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Sausage Fest - Karl Phillips & The Rejects 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Danny & The Champions of the World 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Down & Dirty 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon Meccano Men 9pm - The Mermaid, Burford Ragged Company 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon Saturday June 7 Sausage Fest - All Dayer 1pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury The Liabilitys 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon In It For The Money 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough The Lawrence Bowie Band 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Damn Good Reason

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Pyrates 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Friday July 13 Pugwall + Gazibo + Mighty Magic Animal 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury Rebel Heroes 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon Swindon Shuffle 8pm - Various venues, Swindon Damn Good Reason 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon Hipkiss Band 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon Marc Hopkins as Robbie 9pm - The Mermaid, Burford Oxfordshire Saturday June 14 East End Trinity + Support 8pm - The Winchester Gate, Salisbury

Tom Ivey (duo) 5pm - The Brewery Tap, Oxfordshire Banksy 6pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham Bob Bowles 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon Wednesday July 18 Wacky Wednesday 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon Thursday July 19 Open Mic and Promo Night 8pm - Half Moon, Oxford Friday July 20

Blackmax & The Pirates 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon The Soul Man 9pm - The Mermaid, Burford Light Zeppelin 9.30pm - The Waiting Room, Swindon Flowerz 9pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Saturday July 21 Red Hot Trio 5pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough The Forgetting Curve + Azalea City + SJ Esau 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon Just Floyd 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon Red Hot Trio 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon Sunday July 22

Swindon Shuffle 8pm - Various venues, Swindon

The Trophy Foundlings 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon

The Hammervilles 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon

Wednesday July 25

Dirty Earth Band 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Wacky Wednesday 9pm - The Victoria, Swindon Friday July 27

Rorkes Drift 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

Rotten Aces 8pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Down & Dirty 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon

The Soap Girls 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon

The Useless Eaters 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon

Rorkes Drift 9pm - The Queens Tap, Swindon

Sunday June 15

Belladonna 9pm - The Cross Keys, Swindon

Monkeydolls 5pm - The Bell, Wantage

www.theocelot.co.uk

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Music News Bon Giovi 9pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney Gina 9pm - The Mermaid, Burford Snatch it Back 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon Arkikive Vol #1 Launch, Feat. Mozez 11pm - The Bullingdon, Oxford Saturday July 28

8.15pm - The Wheatsheaf, Oxford

9pm - The Brewery Tap, Oxfordshire

Frank Carducci + Wilding 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Sound Affects 5pm - The Bell, Wantage

The Britpop Boys 8.30pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Lewis Leighton 6pm - The Royal Oak, Corsham

The Naughties 8.30pm - The Lamb Inn, Marlborough

The Worried Men 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon

Shepherds Pie 9pm - The Rolleston, Swindon

The Bucky Rage + The Fnords + Head Noise 8pm - The Three Horseshoes, Bradford Upon Avon

Sunday July 29

Deltaviolin + Tayne + Ape

Rory Evans

Blues Jam 3pm - Fat Lil’s, Witney

Tuesday July 31 Kevin Brown 8pm - The Cellar Bar, Bradford on Avon Frank Carducci + Wilding 8.30pm - The Victoria, Swindon

Legendary venue will rise again!

One of Swindon’s landmark venues is set for a new lease of life - in a move that will be music of the ears of Swindon’s gig scene.

The Rolleston Arms pub and associated basement bar Level 3 closed doors on 20 January this year with singer Frank Turner playing to a sell-out crowd.

But now the landlords of Swindon’s Victoria Pub, Darren Simons and Violet McLaren, have stepped up to the plate to run the venue - which is set to open at the end of the month.

Darren explained: “I’m really excited. The whole venue is being renovated by the brewery and we are all ready for the reopening.

“This will be a great opportunity for us, where we can use the expertise we have built up from running the Vic for five years and apply that here.

We will be continuing to promote great local bands and support Swindon’s thriving music scene.”

We’ve got some ambitious plans which will be announcing in the near future.”

The Rolleston Arms will open doors on June 29 with a big launch earmarked for June 30 featuring a host of local bands including Rotten Aces, Two

Darren Simons outside the Rolleston Arms Sick Monkeys, Street Outlaws, Ian Dozer and Falls on Deaf

Ears. Definitely good news for Swindon’s music scene.

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Books

Book review Words by Claire Dukes Images by Harry Bailey

“the way they leave tells you everything”

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I am a very slow reader, which is one of the reasons I opt for short stories over novels.

The other is because I think there’s something to be said for a short story which can create a bigger visceral impact than a narrative spread over 350 pages - Milk and Honey does just that.

Constructed in four chapters Milk and Honey poetically tours through some of our rawest emotions through the author’s personal experiences which consist of heartbreak, childhood traumas, violence, sex and perseverance - journeying through there were genuine sparks of depression, anger, happiness, arousal and empowerment. It’s an honest account of Rupi Kaur’s experiences over 21 years and they are collated in a way which combines poetry with flash fiction to explore the way in which childhood experiences shape and ripple into your future as well as the moments after and in-between.

It becomes evident that pain and pleasure go hand-in-hand, but it is a beautiful read which left me feeling somewhat serene - perhaps because of the refreshing dose of brutal honesty which is gloriously unapologetic.

I read this chilling out in a park in Dublin, but it’s perfect material for public transport, lone lunches and coffee breaks.

www.theocelot.co.uk

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Agony Girl Five year old Amy is looking forward to the end of school and the holidays but she still finds time to do Agony Girl.

We ask her the questions and these are her answers.... honest!

Dear Amy, I’ve made friends with this person. We used to be, kind of, enemies but then we decided to put our differences aside and realised we had loads in common. But now he won’t stop calling me all the time and wanting to pop round for Dominos and watching reruns of Friends. How do I get rid of him?

Kim Jong Un, PyongYang Sell the thing that you gave him and give it to somebody else. Then say ‘sorry’ because I can’t be your best friend as I sold the thing I gave you. Thank you. Bye.

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Dear Amy, I love swearing. What’s your favourite swear words?

Carlsberg Gav, Marlborough None of them. I like calling people Cakky or chicken wings.

Dear Amy, What’s your favourite sport?

Chris, Oxford Football because it’s fun.

Dear Amy, People seem to be upset with me and I don’t know why. One minute they want me to be tough on people illegally entering my country but when I actually do that they get upset like the big cry babies that they are. All I’ve done is torn families apart and put kids in prison.

Worse things happen in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang for God’s Sake. What should I do?

Donald, New York Say to them, ‘I won’t do anything more to your family’ Ok, you poop doody.

Dear Amy, What’s your favourite joke?

Chris, Oxford Why did the pig cross the road?

Because it wanted to smack everybody’s bums and shout poop doody!

Dear Amy, I was looking in the mirror the other day and I realised that I looked completely different.

Then I realised it was actually a window and I was looking at someone else. Have you ever met anyone as stupid as me?

Nathan, Swindon Yes. The girl that always falls over and cries wolf.

Dear Amy, Do you get annoyed with people asking ‘what’s your favourite’ questions all the time?

Chris, Oxford Yes. Because they are weird and annoying.

Dear Amy, What’s your favourite animal?

Chris, Oxford Tigers because they are cute and stripey and eat other animals I don’t like.

Write in to Agony Girl by emailing jamie@theocelot.co.uk

www.theocelot.co.uk

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