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FREE Spring 2015 No Yard? Try a Patio Garden with Kids From Stormy to Serene: Eight Tips to Make Bedtime Better
Curves Ahead: Six Tips for Dressing Your Body After Baby Arrives Six Memoirs Kids Will Love Teaching Kids to Say Sorry
okanaganchild
Spring 2015
Volume 3, Issue 1
articles
4 Bad Moments, Good Moms 6 Teaching Kids to Say Sorry 8 From Stormy to Serene: Eight Tips to Make Bedtime Better 10 Children of the Okanagan - Aviva Studios 11 Recipe: Waffles and Yogurt Parfait 11 Pinnacles FC - A Place for Every Player 12 Spring Clean Your Medicine Cabinet & Learn the Dangers That May Lurk Inside 14 Six Memoirs Kids Will Love 16 Curves Ahead: Six Tips for Dressing Your Body After Baby Arrives 18 No Yard? Try a Patio Garden with Kids
Cover photo courtesy of
www.bobbisloanphotography.com
every issue
3 Editor’s Note
1 Resource Directory 2 22 Daniela Ginta
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Contributors:
Lara Krupika Christa Melnyk Hines Sara Simeral Liz Tremblay Sue Breton Cindy Hudson Ruth Hanley Janeen Lewis
Editor-in-Chief: Creative Director:
Kerri Milton Bev Tiel
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Okanagan Child is published four times per year by a couple of busy moms. Please note that this magazine is solely funded through the support of our advertisers and sponsors. Please support our advertisers! Opinions expressed in this publication may not necessarily reflect those of the Publishers. All contents copyrightedŠ. No part of this publication may be reprinted, quoted, copied or reproduced without the express written permission of the Publisher.
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editorial note Family Time, shop local, take time for yourself - relax....I hear these things run through my mind as I look around and see my 4 littles, 2 dogs and 1 cat run around the house - and shake my head....ummmm ok! Sometimes those things just seem impossible as I run from cheerleading practice to drama club, to part time jobs, softball, hip hop, school and oh yeah work. The house is in chaos, the fridge is always open (part of having 2 growing teens) the dishwasher and washing machine never quit and the work piles up. Where’s your uniform, do you have your shoes, did you really brush your hair, where’s your other shoe, after drama you have work, ok do you have your costume AND your uniform, where’s your hat, do you have your homework, wait where’s my briefcase, who’s fed the dogs? And in the middle of it all - I smile, a really big, slightly insane, smile. THIS is motherhood, this is my life and they are my heart, my soul and my loves. I could not be more proud, more raw, more real, than I am with them. So as a single mom I work all hours of the day and night, I put a million kilometers on the minivan, I do 100 loads of laundry a week, the dishwasher
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runs twice daily and my house will never be in Home Beautiful unless a magical leprechaun appears - and he would be exhausted when he was done. I will take time out with them, and I will do my best to support my community and shop local, and I will enjoy every single moment no matter how small because no matter how messy my life gets - they are the reason I do what I do and I am who I am. So this spring break - take a break, for yourself and for your littles. Hug them, play ball with them, dance and laugh with them....or whatever it is you enjoy. I will be boarding a plane to Florida to visit Disney World - and just be with them - Disney says it is “the happiest place on earth”, but truthfully to me I think its my home... and I will take a moment to remember that..... hopefully we’ll find the other shoe before we leave! Happy Spring everyone....
Kerri Editor-in-Chief
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Bad Moments, Good Moms by Lara Krupika During pregnancy you gave in to the urge for a Diet Coke. Gasp! You lifted heavy boxes while setting up your baby’s room. Uh oh! You ignored your doctor’s warnings not to gain more weight. Shhh!
4. Locking yourself in the bathroom so you can finish the last chapter of a really good book. 5. Placing your child’s school project on the roof of the car and then driving away with it still up there. 6. Arriving at parent-teacher conferences in your sweats. 7. Sneaking a pacifier/stuffed animal/blankie/ other ‘lovey’ into the trash. 8. Missing an appointment because it just slipped your mind. 9. Letting out an expletive in front of your child (under duress, of course). 10. Accumulating a stack of scout badges that should have been sewn onto a uniform. 11. Accidentally leaving Santa’s special wrapping paper where your child can see it.
Before your child even entered the world you probably lived through more than one guiltproducing ‘bad mom moment.’ Let’s face it, being human means making mistakes and sometimes caving to temptation. Instead of beating yourself up about how you fail as a parent, why not choose forgiveness, or at least acceptance? Take it from plenty of good mothers: we all find as many ways to mess up as there are hours in the day. Don’t believe it? See how many of these bad mom moments sound familiar:
12. Making your child re-wear pants/shirt/ underwear/socks because the laundry wasn’t done. 13. Tooth Fairy? What Tooth Fairy? 14. Putting the car in drive without buckling your child’s car seat. 15. Losing your child in a store, mall or museum.
1. Forgetting to pick your child up from school/ practice/lessons. 2. Eating the last piece of fudge that your son had already claimed. 3. Falling asleep/texting/talking during your daughter’s dance/band/piano performance. 4 l Spring 2015
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16. Finishing the leftovers of your child’s kids’ meal and then having him ask where it went because he’s still hungry. 17. Discovering a rash on your baby’s bottom because (oops!) you hadn’t changed his diaper all day. 18. Unintentionally giving your child a black eye while horsing around. 19. Scolding your child for leaving her dirty plate on the table, only to realize that it was your plate. 20. Finding your son’s goldfish doing the backstroke because you neglected to feed it while your son is at camp. 21. Telling your child he can only have two cookies for a snack and later caving to temptation and having five cookies yourself. Just remember, a bad moment does not make a bad mom. In fact, your response to the mistakes you make with your kids can be growth opportunities for all of you. If nothing else, they often make for funny stories later on. Lara Krupicka is a parenting journalist and mom to three girls. She’s lost count of her bad mom moments, but thankfully her daughters still call her the “Best Mom in the World.”
22. Landing your son on the wait list for the tee ball team when you fail to log on to registration at the exact hour that it opens. 23. Being the only parent to pack a sack lunch for the field trip, while everyone else’s sends money for the cafeteria because outside food is banned. 24. Waking your teen early (at her normal time) on a late start day because you’ve freaked out that she’s going to miss the bus.
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Teaching Kids to Say Sorry by Christa Melnyk Hines At first blush, teaching kids to apologize seems simple. You instruct them to say sorry to whomever they wronged and you move on. But, did your child only say sorry to appease you? Does she really understand what she did wrong?
situation,” says Dr. Stephanie Mihalas, child psychologist, The Center for Well Being, Los Angeles.
Teaching kids to apologize with sincerity helps them learn lessons in empathy, nurturing and forgiveness. And given the messiness of life, those moments requiring apologies tend to be plentiful for practice.
Instead model an empathetic apology. Mihalas suggests the following formula:
Establish house rules. From an early age, clarify behaviors that are okay and those that are not to help youngsters hone their sense of right from wrong and develop strong social skills. “It’s really important to praise the behavior you want to see more of, like ‘thank you for asking before taking that toy from your brother,’” says Dr. Jane Sosland, child psychologist, University of Kansas Medical Center. “Then enforce consequences if they break the rules.” And often that means an apology is necessary. Role model. Consider this common scenario: Junior grabs a toy from the hands of another tot at a playdate. Embarrassed in front of the other parents, you jump in demanding that he give the toy back and apologize. “By immediately scolding him in front of other people, that embarrasses and shames the child without giving him time to reflect about the
1. Apology statement: “Johnny, I’m really sorry that got taken out of your hand.” 2. Feeling statement: “You must feel really bad because you were playing with it.” 3. Corrective response: “I’m going to give it back to you because I know that it shouldn’t have been taken away from you.” “Eventually, what you hope happens is your child picks up implicitly based on how you behave with other people,” Mihalas says. Practice skills. Rather than lecturing your tyke about what he did wrong, role play when you get home by asking him questions like, “I know you really wanted to play with that new toy that Bobby had, but what could you have done differently that wouldn’t have made him cry?” “By doing that you are teaching him positive tactics and skills,” Mihalas says. Show remorse for your mistakes. When you apologize to your children for mistakes you make (and who isn’t guilty of the occasional bad parenting moment?), you show them that no one is above culpability. In turn, they have the opportunity to express forgiveness. Then work to correct your behavior. “The whole point about teaching kids to say sorry is so they can learn from their mistakes,” Sosland
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says. “If we are repeatedly saying sorry (for the same thing), we demonstrate that we are not learning.” But only apologize if you are truly at fault. Instead of saying “I’m sorry” for a disappointment you had no control over, show understanding by saying something like: “I know. I’m sad that happened too.” Cool off first. A hasty “I’m sorry” in the heat of anger is rarely meaningful. Give your child time to calm down in her room and set a time limit for an apology, says parent coach Laura Murphy, president of Real Families, Inc. For instance: “You are welcome to rejoin us once you apologize.” Then, give her ageappropriate choices for how she would like to apologize. “Would you like to apologize with a hug or with your words?” or “Would you like to draw a picture or write a letter saying you are sorry?” Reinforce words with nurturing, corrective action. As part of the apology, help your child find actionable ways to make amends. For example, Murphy says: “’If you are going to call your sister names, I want you to say three nice things to her.’ Or, ‘You hurt your brother. Let’s get him an ice pack to help him feel better.’” “But I’m NOT sorry!” As every parent knows, there are two sides to every story and understanding what happened isn’t always obvious. Once emotions have simmered down, talk to your child and find out why she doesn’t feel like she should apologize.
and convince them to feel differently. There are no right or wrong feelings.” Problem solve ways to handle the situation better in the future. And discuss if there is any part of the incident for which your child should be held accountable. For example, even if her anger was justified, hitting her playmate wasn’t the right way to handle it. In this case, she could say “I’m sorry that I hit you.” “It would solve most of the world’s problems if we took care of what we are responsible for instead of rubbing each others’ noses in what we think the other person should be responsible for,” Murphy says. Teaching forgiveness. As kids learn to say sorry, they also learn forgiveness. “Apologizing is humbling and that’s part of what builds character is being able to humble yourself when you’ve been wrong,” Murphy says. “On the flip side of that is humbling yourself to forgive somebody when you’ve been wronged.” The famous English poet Alexander Pope once wrote, “To err is human; to forgive, divine.” We all make mistakes. By learning to give and accept apologies with empathy and grace, we develop integrity in ourselves and trust in each other. In return, we are rewarded with friendships that last a lifetime. Freelance journalist, Christa Melnyk Hines and her husband are the parents of two boys. Christa’s latest book is Happy, Healthy & Hyperconnected: Raise a Thoughtful Communicator in a Digital World.
“We really don’t want to insist they say sorry when they aren’t sorry,” Sosland says. “Maybe they are right not to feel sorry. Maybe they reacted in a situation where the other child is badgering them and making fun of them, and finally they couldn’t stand it any longer. It’s important to validate their feelings and not to try www.okanaganchild.com
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From Stormy to Serene: by Sara Simeral
The word “bedtime” is loaded for parents. It conjures up images of how it should be: stories, cuddles, kisses, and sweet sleepy children drifting off to sleep. “Bedtime” can also mean frustrating nights: barking orders, kids crying, and the sense that it may never end. After realizing our frustrating nights seemed to be far more frequent than our pleasant nights, I wondered if there was more that I could do to make things go smoothly. I studied our routine (or lack-of) and found what was working and what was not. Daytime Plan “I’m not tired!” and “I can’t sleep” were frequent laments after bedtime in our house. The lights were out, the kids were tucked in, but not for long. Little feet came padding down the stairs and my husband and I would sigh and start Round Two of bedtime. They say the best offense is a good defense; similarly, the best bedtime plan starts during the day. Think about how easy it is to fall asleep after a day of working hard or playing hard outside. That physical tiredness is key to a good night’s rest. The same is true for kids: active play, especially outside, helps them to be ready to meet the sandman at night, on time.
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Eight Tips to Make Bedtime Better
Maintain Routine I admit it, sometimes bedtime was at 6:45 when the kids seemed exhausted. Other nights they’d manage to stretch it to 9:00 pm. Sometimes, it’s just impossible with activities, homework, and chores to keep kids going to bed at the same time every night. However, having a consistent time to shoot for helps the kids and parents know what the plan is. Aim for consistency, not perfection. Start Early We start our bedtime routine long before I expect the little ones to actually go to sleep. Sure, we could get it done in thirty minutes, but when we do, it is stressful and I end up sounding like an Army drill sergeant yelling for the kids to do their next task. Bedtime is better for everyone if we have realistic expectations. Separate Siblings When your kids share a room, bedtime can spiral out of control quickly. We’ve all sent the kids to get ready for bed only to find them an hour later, still dressed and playing. To solve the distraction issue, I decided to get one kid ready for bed at a time. Meanwhile, the other child is downstairs with my husband enjoying one-on-one time with him. When he’s not home I allow some much desired computer time with an educational game to keep the other sibling occupied. After one is ready, we switch. It seems like this method would take twice as long, but without the distraction of a sibling, the kids are better able to focus and get things done. www.okanaganchild.com
Plan to be Present I used to get frustrated that my kids couldn’t (or wouldn’t) do a task alone that I knew they were capable of. Now I grab some laundry and fold it in their room while they are getting ready for bed. Since there is only one child in the room at a time, it’s a great opportunity for us to bond every night for a little bit while we both get our “jobs” done. Make a Visible List Make a simple list (with pictures for pre-readers) that reminds your child of the steps to getting ready for bed, in the order you’d prefer them to be done. Laminate it or put it in a sheet protector and hang it in your child’s room. Read Together The oldest bedtime advice is still the best: reading is a great way to transition from bedtime tasks to a more restful connection before sleep.
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Lights Out – Time for Questions Each night after bedtime stories, I turn off the light and tuck the children into their beds, but they aren’t quite ready to drift off to sleep. Sitting in the quiet dark together brings out the deepest thoughts and questions of the day. Since I started planning this time into our routine, I’ve gotten questions from the kids about faith, death, and heaven and I’ve gotten silly questions like, “Did they have cars when you were a kid?” This is one of those magical times for connection, when the darkness allows for honest thoughts and worries to be shared. Our bedtimes aren’t always perfect, but when I remember to follow these tips, they are much more fun. Sara Simeral is the mother of five-year-old twins. She’s been trying to build a better bedtime since they were born.
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Children of the Okanagan -
Aviva Studios
by Liz Tremblay What if helping out sick kids at Kelowna General Hospital were as easy as smiling for a camera? It can be in a fundraiser spearheaded by Elizabeth Tremblay (Soergel) and Aviva Studios. Tremblay’s inspiration for the project came after the birth of her daughter Lauren. When Lauren was born, she inhaled amniotic fluid which makes breathing extremely difficult for newborns. It can result in death if not treated immediately. Soergel and her family were grateful to the doctors and nurses that saved Lauren’s life and want to make sure other families receive excellent care in the Okanagan. Liz Tremblay is currently working on her 4th edition of “Children of the Okanagan”. To date she has raised over $45 000.00 with this project and is looking forward to raising more money for the children’s ward at KGH through the “Have a Heart” radiothon with support from 99.9 Sun FM and 101.5 EZ Rock. Each page in this beautiful book features a different child, photographed by Tremblay in an outdoor location in the Okanagan between now and August. “I’m really excited to be working on this project again,” said Tremblay. “It’s a creative way I can contribute to the neo natal ward. Project donors will see beautiful pictures of their children included in the book and the KGH Foundation will receive donations for each participant now, as well as revenue from the sale of the book later in the year.”So far I have done three books (2009, 2011 and 2013) and I will continue to do the project every two years”. The way the project works is we will be waiving our regular $200 portrait sitting fee and instead asking parent/guardian to make a $100 donation to the KGH Foundation for every child 10 l Spring 2015
that appears in the book. This project will start now however most sessions will be in the spring and summer of 2015 so that we can take advantage of the best weather for shooting. We encourage parents, grandparents or other family members who are interested to contact us now to reserve their page in the book and to book their shoot as space is limited. Liz plans on releasing the book in early December 2015, in time for the holidays. For more information or to participate in the project by booking your child’s spot in the book, contact Liz Tremblay by phone at (250) 317-4395 or visit her website at www. avivaphotostudios.com. Aviva Studios is pleased to announce that we will be donating 25% of all sales back to the KGH Foundation.
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Waffle and Yogurt Parfait Makes: 1 serving Ingredients: 2 of your favorite waffles or 1 big homemade waffle, toasted until super crunchy • 1 cup plain yogurt • 1/4 tsp vanilla • 1 cup strawberries, sliced •
Directions: 1. Dice toasted waffles into bite size pieces. 2. Mix the yogurt with the vanilla. 3. Layer the yogurt, berries, and waffles pieces in a large glass. Serve immediately. Read more at http://www.branappetit.com
PINNACLES FC – “A PLACE FOR EVERY PLAYER!” Pinnacles FC is a non-profit organization that offers year-round youth soccer programs for over 1800 players, for ages 3 to 18 years, including all skill levels, in all regions of the South Okanagan! Pinnacles FC is dedicated to the development and enjoyment of soccer by youth in the South Okanagan. We contribute to the physical wellness and vitality of our communities and are building a sense of community for parents, players, coaches, referees, spectators and volunteers through a healthy wholesome safe environment. Our philosophy is for ideal long term youth player development. On field we teach patience and teamwork. Off field, we will teach our players to be polite and respectful while being tough and assertive. All players are expected to be in good standing at school. A great soccer player equals a great student which equals a great citizen! www.okanaganchild.com
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Spring Clean Your Medicine Cabinet and Learn the Dangers That May Lurk Inside by Sue LeBreton When you are cleaning your home this spring, do not forget the family medicine cabinet. Remove all the contents and examine dates. Discard any expired or leftover medication. Using expired medication or self-diagnosing and using a previously prescribed drug is downright dangerous. The family medicine cabinet may not be as safe as you imagined. Beyond the obvious advice that all medicine should be stored securely out of reach of children, here are some potential dangers you may not have considered. 1. Do not locate the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. The humidity and heat from showers and baths can alter the composition of medications so that you do not receive the intended effect. 2. Just say no to Asprin for children and teens due its link to Reyes Syndrome, a rare disease that can affect the brain and liver following a viral illness. Use Acetaminophen (Tylenol) or Ibuprofen (Advil and Motrin). Both these classes of drugs offer pain and fever relief but Ibuprofen also offers anti-inflammatory benefits. Discuss with your pharmacist which pain reliever suits your child’s situation. 3. Over the counter (OTC) pain killers are real medicine. Never give adult strength medicine to children. Carefully read instructions for dosing and timing. Note the times you administer medicine so you do not overdose in error. According to Dean Mercer, a pharmacist, “OTCs can increase blood pressure, pose cardiac risk, worsen asthma and complicate infections.” So use them as directed and if you have any questions seek professional advice. 4. Use cold and cough medicines cautiously. They are not recommended for children under six because research has shown that they are of 12 l Spring 2015
limited value and pose serious risks. Mercer suggests that saline drops and spray can offer relief from cold symptoms and honey lozenges can ease the throats of children over a year of age. Children over twelve can be given adult strength but always read the instructions on the medicine container. 5. Small errors can have a large impact on small bodies. Follow the dosage for prescribed and over the counter medicines. Children have been seriously harmed or killed by an overdose. Mercer recommends a syringe with measured lines, not kitchen spoons. Have the pharmacist show you how to measure the dosage if you are unsure. Record your child’s weight regularly so you are not guessing when you are drawing up medicine in the middle of the night with a sleepy brain. 6. Even items like mouthwash can be dangerous to children if ingested in large doses. Razors are a hazard in small hands and aerosols can be toxic if inhaled, so also keep beauty products out of reach. 7. Do not let your medicine cabinet fuel a “pharm party”. This is a practice where teens put prescriptions medicines and OTC drugs from the household medicine cabinet into a big bowl and grab handfuls of pills without knowing what they are taking. Talk to your teens about the dangers of this potentially lethal behavior. 8. Start conversations about proper use of medicine with children when they are young. Do not suggest that medicine “tastes like candy.” Model taking your own medication appropriately. Do not take medicine prescribed for someone else or self diagnose and take medicine left over from a previous illness. Sue LeBreton is health and wellness journalist with two children. She has drawn up her fair share of medicine over the years, always in syringes, never in kitchen spoons. www.okanaganchild.com
inspire their TOMORROWS with your choice TODAY
Visit our Open House March 28th: 10am to 1pm or call us to book a private tour.
Your Choice Could Set Them On The Right Path Visit us at either of our locations and experience the BrightPath difference. See how we raise the standard of early learning, delivering the very best in curriculum, interaction and programming provided in a safe and loving environment. Isn’t something this important worth a visit?
DEVELOP THE MIND. NOURISH THE BODY. INSPIRE THE SOUL.
WWW.BRIGHTPATHKIDS.COM | LAWRENCE AVENUE: 250.860.9788 | WEST KELOWNA: 250.452.6866 www.okanaganchild.com
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Six Memoirs Kids Will Love by Cindy Hudson Memoir, a popular genre for adults, is less thought of for children. Yet good memoirs written for kids can hook young readers, especially reluctant ones, with stories about things that happened to other children at different times in history and different parts of the world. Life stories aimed at the younger set may be scarcer than those written for adults, but there are some great ones. The list below highlights some of the best to check out at your local library or bookstore. Boy by Roald Dahl. Many kids are already familiar with Roald Dahl through his fictional books, which include Matilda, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and The BFG. This memoir of his years growing up will have your kids laughing out loud as they read about young Roald’s antics. With his signature story-telling style, Dahl recounts stories such as hiding a dead rat in a candy jar, getting his tonsils out at his kitchen table, and more. Kids will have fun learning how real people inspired some of Dahl’s bizarre fictional characters. For ages 8 and up. Zlata`s Diary: A Childs Life in Wartime Sarajevo by Zlata Filipovic. When Zlata Filipovic started her diary she was simply an eleven-yearold girl living in Sarajevo concerned about things like birthday parties, her cat, and piano lessons. But when conflict broke out in her city, suddenly she was part of a war zone. Confined mostly to her home, she endured food shortages and worried for the safety of everyone she knew. This depiction of a somewhat modern war especially resonates with children when they discover that 14 l Spring 2015
Zlata and her parents escaped, and that Zlata is now a young woman living in Ireland. For ages 10 to 13. Red Scarf Girl: A Memoir of the Cultural Revolution by Ji-li Jiang. Filled with patriotic fervor for the Chinese communist government, Ji-li is at first ashamed to be part of her family, which is persecuted because of her grandfather’s political beliefs. But as she sees injustices heaped onto the heads of many people around her, she gradually becomes disillusioned and no longer believes government propaganda. Ji-li’s authentic voice inspires discussion about family loyalties, government betrayals, and China’s history. For ages 10 to 14. A Girl from Yamhill by Beverly Cleary. The beloved writer of Ramona Quimby, Age 8 and up. The Mouse and the Motorcycle writes about her own childhood growing up in the small town of Yamhill, Oregon, before moving to the city of
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Portland. Her tales of childhood in the 1920s and the early years of The Great Depression are full of rich details sure to fascinate young readers. Cleary’s memories of school and teachers should provide insight about what education was like in the early part of the last century versus what kids today encounter. Cleary’s relationship with her parents also provides a look at how parents communicated with children then and now. Ages 10 to 14. Looking Back: A Book of Memories by Lois Lowry. With The Giver being made into a movie, Lowry and her books have been in the spotlight. In her memoir, she gives readers direct insight into the inspiration for some of the stories by opening each section with an excerpt from one of her novels. What kid wouldn’t be fascinated to read about the frozen rat she tried to revive in her oven or the embarrassing clothes her mother made her wear? Ages 8 and up.
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Marshfield Dreams: When I Was a Kid by Ralph Fletcher. Young readers will be charmed by Fletcher’s stories of roaming the woods near his small town in Massachusetts, raising chickens, and playing games with his brothers and neighbors. Kids of today are likely to marvel at the relative freedom children had growing up in the 1960s and the amount of time many of them spent outdoors. It’s also fun to look at the family photos that appear at the start of each short and accessible chapter. Ages 8 to 12. Cindy Hudson is the author of Book by Book: The Complete Guide to Creating Mother Daughter Book Clubs. She creates lists of books for all ages at MotherDaughterBookClub.com.
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Curves Ahead: by Cindy Hudson
Six Tips for Dressing Your Body After Baby Arrives
Curves Ahead: Six Tips for Dressing Your Body After Baby Arrives One day, you pull on your favorite maternity clothes, glance lovingly at your baby sleeping next to you, and realize that it’s been a month since your baby was born! Though you’re no longer pregnant, you still might not fit comfortably into your pre-pregnancy clothes just yet. Most moms are too busy with the amazing, exhausting work of caring for their newborn to think too long about what will fit comfortably on their new curves. If it’s time to pack away the maternity clothes, but you’re not back to your regular size just yet, here are some ideas to help you easily and inexpensively find something comfortable to wear. 1. Embrace Your Shape When you shop, make sure you are buying clothes for your body as it is rather than what you want it to be. Katy, mom to three girls and Body Back Manager with Fit4Mom near Seattle says, “Invest in a pair of jeans that look awesome on you right now, not in six months. Invest in a few shirts in amazing colors and fit the body you have right now.” Your body will continue to change and most moms find that their size decreases in a few months, but in the meantime, show some love to your current shape and it will show in your style. 2. Find the Perfect Pair of Pants Once you find pants that fit well, the rest will seem easy. Assign someone to babysit while you shop for pants, even if they just come along and hold the baby while you hit the dressing room. One mom says, “Be sure to take someone with you who will be honest about what looks good” Go to a store with 16 l Spring 2015
lots of different fits or brands to find out what works for your body. Make fit come first so that you can concentrate on the work of caring for a newborn, rather than having to worry about pulling up a pair of constantly sagging jeans. 3. Give ‘Em the Old Razzle-Dazzle Wear all those bright, pretty colors that you love, and don’t be afraid to stand out. It helps to find shirts that fit loosely in front, or have a pattern to them, if you feel sensitive about your midsection. Shirts that are tight, shiny, or any solid color may highlight curves that you don’t want to accentuate. You can also wear a long fitted tank top underneath your shirts to smooth the line and cover your midsection if your shirt rides up. Wearing colors that you love and experimenting with patterns will help you remember to celebrate your body as it is right now. 4. Don’t Break the Bank Money is usually a bit tight at this time and you don’t know how long you will be your current size. However, there are ways buy clothes without spending too much. One way is to shop www.okanaganchild.com
5. No Time? Mail Yourself a Wardrobe! Once you know the size and brands that fits your body, you can shop clearance items online and never have to leave the house to shop. Lisa, mom of two, shares that she bought several items at an online consignment store. “I got great deals on items to get me through the first few months when Ididn’t have time to go out shopping for myself.” In this day and age, there are many online resources to take advantage of as a new mom and make your shopping trips easier. Knowing a company has an easy return policy helps too, when you’re still finding out what fits best 6. Your Greatest Accessory Wear your baby! Wearing your baby in a carrier makes your little one feel protected and secure. Try on a few different types of carriers with your baby and pick the one that works best and fits comfortably. Learn how to put it on and take it off and get comfortable with it. The closeness between you and your baby will be beneficial, and yes, it all fits right over that extra baby weight! Some of the body changes you go through after you have a baby are temporary. Some changes are for keeps. Own your own body image and be confident in yourself, because you are beautiful, life-giving, strong, and more than just your body. Take time to appreciate how your life has been indelibly changed in ways you never could have dreamed. You are a mom! Own it. You are soft, comforting, beautiful, tired, and amazing. Ruth Hanley is the mom of two girls and has had to look for in-between stage clothing twice. She believes that the way a mom smiles when she interacts with her baby is her most beautiful feature. www.okanaganchild.com
Style Resources for New Moms When You Have Some Money but No Time Try Stitchfix at www.stitchfix.com. It’s an online stylist that mails you a selection of clothing, based on a style profile that you fill out. They make returns easy, so you return what you don’t want and keep and pay for only what you do want. When You Have Little Money and No Time: Thred Up at www.thredup.com is an online consignment store which mails you items that you pick out from their store. You can also have them pick up clothes from your wardrobe that you no longer need and turn it into credit to use with them. When You Have Even Less Money and No Time You can buy clothes online at Goodwill at www. shopgoodwill.com. Similar to Ebay’s bidding style, you can browse items online just like you would the racks at the store and pay a fraction of the price of what you would pay in malls. When you have little money but some time Buckle up your baby in their car seat and pick clothes up from a seller on www.craigslist.org . Many sellers give away whole bags of clothes at a certain size, which you can then go through and discover the ones that look adorable on you!
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consignment stores, which carry clothes for much less than retail stores. You also have the option of bringing in your old clothes in exchange for credit at the store. Brigitte, mom of two says, “Consignment shopping also helps at the time when you have lots of spit up and spills. After both my kids were born, I shopped my entire wardrobe at consignment stores.” Consignment stores are a great resource for clothes you don’t plan to wear forever.
Fashions for Maternity + Nursing + Beyond Kanata (ON) 1(866) 615-3800 Spring 2015 l
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No Yard? Try a Patio Garden with Kids by Janeen Lewis I come from a long line of green thumbs on both sides of my family. When I had children of my own, I wanted to pass my gardening heritage on to them, but we’ve never had a yard suitable for a garden. Then my kids and I tried vegetable gardening in containers, and I discovered that we cultivated more than plants on our patio. Gardening taught my kids patience, responsibility and something that surprised me – how to eat more vegetables.
Collect containers early. Gather containers that are at least 10 inches wide and 12 inches deep, or for vining plants, 20 inches wide. Reuse any five gallon buckets you have, or peruse thrift shops or flea markets with your children in search of gardening pots. Steer clear of black containers because they absorb sunlight which can cause soil to dry out and create endless watering. Also, if the container doesn’t have any way to drain, be sure to drill one-fourth inch holes in the bottom. This way water will keep the plant moist, but not make the roots so wet they rot. When selecting a container, Halas-Liang suggests letting children paint the pot. “Involve them in the growing process from start to finish,” Halas-Liang said. Choose your vegetables. After you have plenty of containers, choose vegetables to grow. Some great ones for container gardening are tomatoes, cucumbers, beets, green beans, green onions, herbs, and potatoes. Keep in mind that vining plants like cucumbers or tomatoes may need a trellis. Start small the first year and then add as you grow more knowledgeable and confident.
“Gardening is a great way to get children to feel ownership for the foods they eat,” said Melissa Halas-Liang, a registered dietician and founder of SuperKids Nutrition Inc., an online nutrition resource for parents and healthcare professionals. “If kids feel ownership, they are more likely to help cook the food and eat it.” Whether you live in a high rise apartment or a house with a limited amount of green space, your family can reap the benefits of gardening together. Follow these simple steps to start a thriving container garden. 18 l Spring 2015
Halas-Liang advises choosing plants that will grow quickly. “Children like to see results. Pick a vegetable that doesn’t take a long time to reach its harvest.” She recommends lettuce, squash, or zucchini (yes, they can be grown in pots – check for varieties suitable for containers). Another kid-friendly plant for container gardening would be the herb basil, which also has a high nutritional value. “Basil has a ton of antioxidants, and a couple of tablespoons of basil is the equivalent of a small serving of vegetables,” Halas-Liang said. www.okanaganchild.com
Seed or Seedling? Next, decide if you want to start your own plants from seed. If so, this may be another step you start early, depending on the growing season where you live. When collecting containers for indoor windowsill seeds, think outside the Styrofoam cup and save empty milk cartons, ecofriendly cardboard egg cartons, and paper cups to hold dirt. You can even put a seed in a Ziploc bag with a damp paper towel, tape it to the window glass, and it watch it sprout.
Children are usually eager to help and enjoy the cycle of growing produce. If you encounter any plant problems, ask a neighbor who gardens or consult your local agriculture extension agent. Gardeners usually love to share their craft, and you and your children will grow a sense of community along with your new gardening skills. Reap the rewards of the harvest. Let your children help pick the fruits (in this case vegetables) of their labor. With a little planning and some creative containers, your family can harvest cultivation skills, time together, and healthy food—without leaving the patio! Growing Green: Pick an Eco-friendly Pot
Select your soil. Once the threat of freezing temperatures has passed, you are ready to plant outside in containers. Be sure to use a soil specifically for container gardening. Now you are ready to plant! Those seedlings that you have worked so hard to grow (or debated so hotly over at the garden center) are ready to put into containers. Plant them, place them where they will get six hours of direct sunlight, and water them, but not so much that they drown. Do a daily test by sticking your finger about an inch into the soil. If it feels dry, the plant needs water.
When choosing containers for a patio garden, there are many clever ideas that promote recycling. Some creative choices include anything from shoes and wagons to old sinks and tubs. While it is a good idea to repurpose when we plant, some containers may have toxins or chemicals that can leach out into the soil and the food you grow. To be on the safe side, follow these tips for picking the perfect pot. 1. Know the container’s history. If possible find out what materials the container was made from and what it was used for. If you are uncertain, it is better to look for a different container. (continued on Page 20)
Keep a diligent watch. Watch for any problems such as disease or soil issues. Work together as a family sharing the responsibility of watering and checking the plants. www.okanaganchild.com
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(continued from Page 19)
Elementary Age:
2. If the container is old or painted, be certain that it does not contain asbestos or lead paint.
The Curious Garden by Peter Brown In the middle of a city of concrete and steel, a boy named Liam tends to some plants and realizes a lush garden can thrive in an unlikely place.
3. Rethink using a set of wheels when planting vegetables. Tire rubber can leach chemicals into the soil. 4. Avoid plastic containers with a 3, 6 or 7 in the recycling triangle on the bottom. These can also release toxins. 5. When using natural wood planters, try untreated wood. Some good choices that hold up for years are cedar, redwood, cypress and pine.
Linnea’s Windowsill Garden by Cristina Bjork and Lena Anderson Using creative containers, Linnea inspires and informs how to grow an indoor garden. Compost Stew by Mary McKenna Siddals From A to Z, this is a good resource for teaching children and their parents how to make their own compost pile and give the planet a helping hand.
6. Don’t forget fabric. Old fabric shoe organizers, bags and even fabric pots make good containers. 7. Don’t rule out self-watering containers. These are a good choice for burgeoning gardeners and green thumbs alike. Great Books for Green Thumbs Sow the seeds of reading and gardening by reading one of these great books for gardeners of all ages. Preschool:
Tweens, Teens, and Adults: All New Square Foot Gardening, Second Edition: The Revolutionary Way to Grow More in Less Space by Mel Bartholomew
Growing Vegetable Soup by Lois Ehlert This picture book teaches young children the process of growing vegetables from seed to harvest and ends with a recipe for vegetable soup.
By the host of the former PBS series “Square Foot Gardening,” this book is a how-to on gardening in square-foot blocks of space rather than traditional rows.
How Groundhog’s Garden Grew by Lynne Cherry When Little Groundhog eats lettuce from his neighbor’s garden, his friend Squirrel teaches him to grow his own produce through the seasons.
The Vegetable Gardener’s Container Bible: How to Grow a Bounty of Food in Pots, Tubs, and Other Containers by Edward C. Smith
Pumpkin Circle: The Story of a Garden by George Levenson and Shmuel Thaler With verse and vivid photographs, this book details the life cycle of a pumpkin. 20 l Spring 2015
Teaches even beginning gardeners how to grow organic food in small spaces. The book covers container and tool selection, caring for plants and controlling pests without chemicals. Janeen Lewis is a freelance writer and green thumb in training. She loves to grow plants from seed to harvest with her two children, Andrew and Gracie.
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Resource Directory This Issue ADHD Inside Out www.adhdinsideout.com coach@adhdinsideout.com
Breastfeeding Clinics / Support Okanagan Breastfeeding Coalition 330 Ellis St., Penticton, BC www.okanaganbreastfeeding.org
Public Health Services/Nurses Kelowna Health Unit 1340 Ellis Street 250.868.7700
778.214.8886 Aviva Studios www.avivaphotostudios.com 250.317.4395 Blossoming Mother Counselling www.blossomingmothercounselling.com katherine@blossomingmothercounseling.com
250.485.8606 Brightpath Early Learning & Child Care www.brightpathkids.com 250.860.9788 Kelowna 250.452.6866 Westbank grobag by oyaco www.facebook.com/oyacoproducts www.oyaco.com hautemama www.hautemama.ca 1.866.615.3800 Maternity, nursing and beyond Kelowna & District Safety Council www.kdsc.bc.ca info@kdsc.bc.ca 250.765.3163 FB 888.580.7233 Okanagan Foster Parents Assn www. okfosterparents.ca information@okfosterparents.ca Penticton Bereavement Centre www. pentictonvereavementresources.com 250.490.1107 Royal Soccer Club www.royalsoccer.com 1.800.427.0536 Pinnacles FC www.pinnaclesfc.com clubleague@pinnaclesfc.com
250.476.5888 Front Cover Photographer
Bobbi Sloan Photography www.bobbisloanphotography.com 250.689.2475 www.okanaganchild.com
Childcare Resource & Referral Kelowna Child Care Resource & Referral #4 - 1890 Ambrosi Rd. Kelowna, BC 250.762.3536 www.childcarechoices.ca Penticton Child Care Resource & Referral 330 Ellis St., Penticton, BC 250.492.2926 www.kelownachildcare.com Vernon Child Care Resource & Referral 3300- 37th Avenue, Vernon, BC 250.542.3121 www.ccrrvernon@boysandgirlsclubs.ca Midwives and doulas Doula Services Association, BC 604.515.5588 www.bcdoulas.org Midwives Asscoation of BC 604.736.5976 www.bcmidwives.com Alternative Schooling
Cedar Bridge www.whywaldorfworks.com 250.547.9212 Kelowna Waldorf School www.KelownaWaldorf.org 250.764.4130 Mind Over Learning www.mindoverlearning.com 250.860.0084 Summerland Montessori School www.summerlandmontessori.com 250.494.7266
Penticton Health Unit 740 Carmi Avenue 250.770.3434 Rutland Health Unit 155 Gray Road 250.980.4825 Summerland Health Unit 12815 Atkinson Road 250.404.8050 West Kelowna Health Unit 160 – 2300 Carrington Road 250.980.5150 Vernon Health Unit 1440 – 14th Avenue 250.549.5700 Salmon Arm Health Unit 851-16th Street NE Salmon Arm BC 250.833.4100 Osoyoos Health Centre 4816 89th Street Osoyoos, BC 250.495.6433 Oliver Health Centre 7139 - 362nd Ave Newlands Rd Oliver, BC 250.498.5080 Pleasant Valley Health Centre 3800 Patten Drive Armstrong BC 250.546.4700 Photography & Portraits
Carly Blake Photography carlyblakephotography@live.ca 250.469.2070 Everyday Little Moments www.everydaylittlemoments.com
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Children And Food by Daniela Ginta
The genetically modified apple is sure to make some frown. Do we need it? If apples brown they do so for a reason and that is to let us know that eating them fresh is best. Children nowadays grow up with food coming from bags and being made convenient. Not only that, they grow up with food waste, a lot of it in some cases. Food is never to be thrown out in our household and every morsel is to be thankful for. The ‘some kids do not have enough food, or any for that matter’ does not help much unless it’s followed by more than just words. Guilt doesn’t help much with putting the leftovers from one kid onto the plate of another.
What children need to learn is that food is not cheap and it does not become garbage when the plate if half-full. Growing up grateful for every meal helps children in more than one way. Children become the echo of what they learn at home and inspire someone along the way. I’ve seen it happen more than once. I always believed that children understand more than we give them credit for. Food (and all related) is no exception. Catering to their needs in a way that does not create a sense of entitlement becomes essential.
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Teach Them The Way to a Better Plate
I don’t remember the first time I referred to meals simply as …food, when asked what do we have for dinner, but I remember my sons tilting their heads amused. Food? Sure, all of it. Take the game further?... What kind of food, they’d ask. Freshly cooked. They smiled, became curious and they obliged to at least tasting it. With an added wee rule: no food deserves an ‘eww’, as long as it is part of a freshly prepared meal. Sure there are favourites, we all have them, but my wish is to help my sons understand that no bit of food is too humble or too simple to be called food and lumped with the best of them.
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children’s eyes about more than what it tastes like; make it real. Help them see the seasons on their plate and add consciousness to the shopping list. The world does not change overnight but it does so, slowly, with every change every person makes in their own lives. When it comes to children, it becomes a must as the world will be theirs to inherit one day. Teaching them to eat right is part of it.
Daniela Ginta, MSc Freelance writer www.ThinkOfClouds.com about.me/DanielaGinta
You see, I never believed in kids’ menus and grownups’ menus. Food is to be shared by the whole family and it is to be grateful for. As the boys grew older, we talked about food and its origins. Having a garden puts things in perspective, but then again, we cannot not grow everything. They started asking questions. Where is the broccoli from? And the potatoes? And the chicken? It is often how a long conversation starts, extending way beyond the potatoes and into the social and environmental imprint of food, into food supply and world hunger. Food on a plate should teach more than just colours and textures. It teaches respect towards food, never to be taken for granted. Children need to learn about the impact they can have on things around. They will learn that growing food or buying it close to home helps lower the pollution that happens when food is being transported around the globe just so we can have it all and every kind at our fingertips. The environmental and social impact of food is a real one. When food grows in places we are so removed from, we don’t get to see those who grow it, nor do we know if people’s health is affected by the chemicals they are compelled to use to grow the crops we’ve gotten so used to enjoying all year-round. Make food an opportunity to open your
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