September/October 2013 60 PLUS In Omaha by Omaha Magazine

Dating Over 60

Finding a Balance between Online Dating and Meetups Family Ties

Rewarding Reunions

Affordable Care Act What It Means for Seniors

Jim Hanson and Linda Knapp

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volume 1 . issue 5

Active Living: Iris Moreano_________ S4 Gwen’s Tips: Grocery Delivery_______ S5 Feature: Family Ties_____________ S6

We will NOT ld! rso n u be de

Ages 6mos+

Contents

Cover Feature: Dating Over 60______ S8 Column: Affordable Care Act_______S10 Health: Uterine Prolapse_________ S13 Style: Big Names in Fashion_______S14

s a child, I remember my

father and his eight siblings, getting together for family reunions. I enjoyed seeing my cousins, and we’ve remained friends. They continued the tradition well into their late 80s, spending several days at their different homes all over the country, catching up on each other’s lives. My sister and I are now the oldest family members, and our children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, and extended families carry on the tradition with annual events. This issue of 60 Plus includes advice on how to plan a family reunion of your own. What a great way to learn history and personal stories about your family! You also might find our story on dating of interest. We’ve given you some tips on where you can socialize, even if you’re not particularly looking for romance.

Gwen Gwen Lemke Contributing Editor, 60 Plus In Omaha Comments? Send your letter to the editor to: letters@omahapublications.com All versions of Omaha Magazine are published bimonthly by Omaha Magazine, LTD, P.O. Box 461208, Omaha NE 68046-1208. Telephone: (402) 884-2000; fax (402) 884-2001. Subscription rates: $19.95 for 6 issues (one year), $24.95 for 12 issues (two years). No whole or part of the contents herein may be reproduced without prior written permission of Omaha Magazine, excepting individually copyrighted articles and photographs. Unsolicited manuscripts are accepted, however no responsibility will be assumed for such solicitations. Best of Omaha®™ is a registered tradename of Omaha Magazine.

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60PLUS active living Story by Jasmine Maharisi • Photo by Keith Binder

Zumba Instructor Iris Moreano On-the-Go Dynamo

ris Moreano just can’t seem to

sit still. The 66-year-old Zumba instructor keeps her days filled to the brim with such activities as exercising, gardening, and teaching. And she has no intention of slowing down any time soon. Moreano moved to Omaha nine years ago with her husband shortly after he was diagnosed with a chronic illness. Living in a new town coupled with the new role of caretaker left her feeling a bit stressed. Not one to sit around and wallow in despair, she joined a gym to meet new people and relieve pressure. When the gym began offering Zumba classes, a total-body workout combining Latin and international rhythms with dance moves, Moreano signed up. S4 60PLUS

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“I’m originally from Puerto Rico, so I grew up with that type of music: salsa, merengue, and cumbia,” she says. “It was a lot of fun, and I felt good afterwards.” In 2007, Moreano became licensed to teach Zumba. While she currently teaches regular classes at Motion41 Dance studio at 125th and West Center streets, she also teaches at Curves in Elkhorn and at Fullerton Elementary School. All in all, Moreno teaches Zumba three to five days per week and substitutes when needed. But she has been known to teach six days per week with five classes each day. “I don’t think I’m ever going to retire,” she says. “My age is just a number. It’s all about how you feel and live. Zumba is good

for that because it’s like a party. I get e-mails from students saying that they can’t wait for the next class. So it feels good to help other people relieve their stress like I do mine.” Moreano is also a full-time English-asa-Second-Language (ESL) instructor at Fullerton Elementary, a position she finds “very rewarding.” In her spare time, she enjoys reading and tending to her garden. As a walking (and dancing) testament to the benefits of an active lifestyle, Moreano credits her clean bill of health to her on-the-go schedule. As for other Omaha seniors looking to become more active, Moreano has some advice: “Keep your mind busy but don’t take things too hard,” she says. “Try to stay positive. Try to exercise, whether it’s just walking. Do it for you. You’ve got to keep healthy and take care of yourself before you can help anyone else.” www.OmahaMagazine.com

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60PLUS feature Story by Carol Crissey Nigrelli • Photos by Chris Wolfgang

Top: The Killion family meets for their 2013 reunion. Bottom: Anna Killion traces the family lineage through the ages.

Family Ties

Reunions take work but, oh, the rewards. illion family members from all over the country take turns hosting reunions

every two years, a ritual that’s been going on now for over three decades. Jim and Anna Killion of Omaha had a chance to relive shared memories with 50 of Jim’s blood relatives and their spouses, most of them elderly, when the couple hosted the gathering July 19-21 at the Marriott Regency. Advancing age and health issues have pared down participation; reunions used to draw over 100. Since 1985, the Lewandowski clan has met every three years in several different states and always over the Fourth of July weekend. Kathy Aultz of Omaha welcomed more than 250 people, including a two-week-old baby, to her home turf for this year’s reunion. The fest took place at Mahoney State Park, where families stayed in cabins or nearby hotels. A 90th birthday party for Marian Leach of Omaha, organized by her daughter, Kathy Meier Morris of Columbus, Neb., provided a much-anticipated get-together of the Meier/ Leach immediate family in early June. The last time Meier Morris, her two brothers, and their families converged on Omaha (outside of weddings and funerals) was 10 years ago for Leach’s 80th. The community room at Pacific Springs Village in West Omaha, where Leach lives independently, provided an intimate space for heartfelt congratulations. Three family social gatherings—each different in size, scope, and purpose—nevertheless S6 60PLUS

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answer a basic need most Americans share: the need to belong. “We tell our history through stories. By gathering families together, you have the opportunity to reconnect,” muses Aultz, who, as executive director of the Douglas County Historical Society, dedicates both her personal and professional life to preserving and sharing the past. “Reunions keep us grounded.” Successful reunions have a central purpose. For Aultz and her relatives, the marriage of Anton and Sophia Lewandowski on May 6, 1919, in central Nebraska provided the reason to celebrate. Aultz’s mother, 88-yearold Esther Lewandowski Kaminski, was the first of 10 children born to the couple. “I put Grandma and Grandpa’s wedding pictures up a lot of places at the reunion because that’s when our family tree started,” says Aultz. The family tree now has 449 leaves on it and is still sprouting. Aultz contacted every family by letter over a year ago about the reunion dates and then followed up with several e-mails. A nod to the fierce pride the group feels about their Polish heritage could be found in the handouts: a cookbook with favorite Polish recipes that families e-mailed to Kathy ahead of time, and a refrigerator magnet made of cloth and shaped into a pierogi (Polish dumpling). The Lewandowski reunions include lots of games for the children, golf tournaments for adults, outings (a busload of people visited the Holy Family Shrine in Gretna), endless buffets, and socializing that lasts into the wee hours of the morning. Genealogy spurs the Killions to gather biannually. They have traced their roots to an ancestor, possibly Irish, who sailed from England and landed on the shores of North Carolina in 1755. Descendants, many of whom live in Illinois, Iowa, and Nebraska, spend reunion time visiting cemeteries, checking dates on gravestones, documenting family historical data, and touring places of historic significance; a passion not necessarily shared by the younger generations. “Anyone under 40 couldn’t care less about history and antiques because they haven’t reached an age where it’s important to them,” laments Killion, 73, who acts as keeper of the spreadsheet that contains 225 family names, addresses, and phone numbers. Then, with a wry smile, Killion continues, “I called Omaha Magazine to get some www.OmahaMagazine.com

handouts because it has a great events calendar, and she asked me, ‘What age group are we addressing?’ And I said, ‘Seventy and over. You know, yesterday’s teenagers!’” As reunion organizer for the past 15 years or so, Killion knows the importance of nailing down dates and hotel space at least a year in advance, no matter where the event is held. Almost 100 members of her husband’s family don’t have e-mail, forcing Killion to use the U.S. Postal Service for the initial Save the Date letter that also contains the location and registration information. She then follows up with phone calls. “One of my favorite tricks is to put the invitation on iridescent paper. That way it doesn’t get lost,” chuckles Killion, who’s been married to Jim for 48 years and together raised six children. No ‘snail mail’ for Meier Morris; she used Facebook and cell phones to gather about 30 members of her immediate family and stepsiblings to Omaha for a reunion that actually served a dual-purpose. “We had a noon baby shower for one of my daughters, who is due in September, at Upstream that Saturday,” says Meier Morris, who explains that the men played pool and ate lunch there. “Mom’s party was at 7 that evening, and we had it catered. It was easy. Our family stayed at the Embassy Suites La Vista.” “I was just thrilled to see everybody,” exclaims Marian Leach, a grandmother of eight and great-grandmother of eight (with one on the way). “I couldn’t believe they would go to that trouble and expense to be with me!” To which her family might respond, why wouldn’t they give back to a woman who continues to give so much to them? Why wouldn’t they celebrate a woman whose strength, vitality, faith, and loving nature sustained her through the heartbreaking loss of two husbands? “We all stood up and told ‘mom’ stories,” says Meier Morris. “The grandchildren talked about all the trips she took them on; trips to Cozumel, Cancun, Baja. We just wanted her to know that we love her, and we’re very proud of her.” The Killions, Lewandowskis, and the Meier/Leach families reached through time, miles, and hectic lifestyles to strengthen the ties that bind them—a legacy worth passing down to generations. www.BestOfOmaha.com

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60PLUS cover feature Story by Melissa McElroy • Photo by Bill Sitzmann Jim Hanson and Linda Knapp share a malt at Petrow’s Restaurant.

Empathize with Jim Hanson, Karen Larson, and Linda Knapp? Think the Omaha dating scene for seniors is a bit of a challenge? We’ve rounded up these sites to get you started on your own road to romance.

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Dating Sites

Meetup Sites

plentyoffish.com seniorpeoplemeet.com eharmony.com/senior-dating datingforseniors.com dating.aarp.org seniorpassions.com ourtime.com

seniors.meetup.com single-seniors.meetup.com seniors-social.meetup.com senior-singles-get-together.meetup.com

www.OmahaMagazine.com

Dating Over 60

Finding a Balance between Online Dating and Meetups im Hanson peruses a sea of online

profiles, hoping to find his match. What sets this self-professed Renaissance man apart from thousands of other men doing the same exact thing? His age: 65. At a time in life when most people his age are thinking of retirement and mutual funds, he is looking for love. After being happily married for 33 years, Hanson, a widower, found himself in a position understood by many of his generation: He was alone. Never one to give up, he has tirelessly searched for the right person for the last seven years. “I have met a lot of neat people in that time,” he says. “The main thing I noticed that’s different dating now than then [in his 20s] is people have twice the baggage.” He explains that there are two groups of people he has encountered on his quest: widows and divorcees. “The thing about baggage is you gotta find someone to help you unpack it.” According to the U.S. Census Bureau, people 65 and over make up 13.9 percent of Nebraska’s population. Many local seniors are experiencing being single again after the death or divorce of a spouse. Plenty are turning to online dating sites to meet other people. This was the case for Linda Knapp. “It is really difficult to meet people,” she admits. Despite the fact that she owns her own business and interacts with countless people both socially and professionally, the 66-year-old has not dated much in the last year and a half. “I don’t like going to bars. It’s difficult to find a venue to meet people of my generation.” Like many, she turned to online dating. After a couple of bad experiences, she decided it wasn’t for her. Karen Larson doesn’t look at seniors dating as any different from the younger generations. “No matter what age, it’s difficult to meet people.” Which is why the local 56-year-old started organizing meetup groups on Plenty of Fish, an online dating forum, to help people get out there and meet new people. “I like to host in small venues so people can www.BestOfOmaha.com

actually get a chance to talk,” she says adding, “It’s a safe environment where people can meet.” According to her, a safe environment is what women want. “Many women from my generation have never walked into a bar by themselves.” She will meet up with people and help ease their anxiety, acting as a modern-day matchmaker. “I have success stories,” she says. One woman who was nervous about attending a meet-and-greet that Karen organized found her special someone after attending the gatherings for a few months. “Everyone has baggage,” Larson says, echoing Hanson. “I don’t even like to look at it as baggage. I think of it as experiences that shape who you are. It can be positive or negative. Just like your past experiences, dating can be the same way, depending on how you look at it. It’s a scary adventure. People don’t want to be taken. There are those who play games and want to play with your heart. You have to discern the difference. One sign? Can the person describe their past without extreme emotion? Without anger or sadness? If not, they aren’t ready to date again.” “The way I see it, it’s a numbers game,” Hanson says with the zeal of a pep squad cheerleader. “You have to love without fear. It takes honesty, integrity, and a sense of humor. Yesterday is gone forever. Learn from it and move on. I lost my beautiful wife of 33 years in an instant. Nothing is a given. Embrace today. Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.” After many years of dating and many more being married, he will tell you the importance of communication and making compromises. At the end of the day, he says he is looking for the same thing everyone looks for: that person who is the last person you think of at night and the first thing you think of in the morning. “It’s like that famous quote,” Hanson explains, “‘Love is like a butterfly.’ If you chase after it, it will fly away. But if you are patient and wait long enough, it will land in your hands.” september/october • 2013

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60PLUS feature Story by Kara Schweiss • Photos by Bill Sitzmann

Andrea Skolkin

The Affordable Care Act What It Means for Seniors

he Patient Protection and

Affordable Care Act (PPACA), better known as the Affordable Care Act (ACA), is a federal statute signed into law in 2010. The objective of the Act is to increase affordability and rate of coverage for health insurance and reduce the overall costs of health care, which will be executed through mandates, subsidies, tax credits, and other means. The ACA is divided into 10 titles with some provisions that became effective immediately, while others are phasing in over a 10-year period. But what does this mean for most seniors? S10 60PLUS

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Individuals over 65 will likely find that not much will change as far as Medicare is concerned, says Andrea Skolkin, chief executive officer for OneWorld Community Health Centers, Inc. More preventive care is covered and prescription drug coverage will improve, she says, but most facets of Medicare will carry on as before. “People who have Medicare, other than the little bit of expansion in the ‘donut hole’ [Medicare Part D coverage gap between the initial coverage limit and the catastrophiccoverage threshold for prescription drugs], should be secure in their coverage,” she

explains. “The new marketplace isn’t for people who have Medicare.” Sixty-plus individuals who will definitely be affected by ACA are those seniors who haven’t reached the Medicare eligibility age of 65 and are without medical insurance. In January 2014, uninsured individuals will be required to buy health insurance, available through an exchange, or pay a penalty tax. Some people will certainly struggle to finance the premiums, but currently, seniors who don’t yet qualify for Medicare and can’t get covered through an employer are likely to take their chances and go without health insurance altogether, Skolkin says. “If you don’t have insurance between age 60 and 65, that’s a concern,” she says. “We see a lot of it—people 55 and up—who are being ‘right-sized,’ if you will, out of their jobs and are left without anything until they are eligible for Medicare. Especially at our new clinic in West Omaha, we see a lot of uninsured adults.” From a financial standpoint, it’s fair to say that ACA will not spell good news for everyone’s pocketbook, says EJ Militti, a financial advisor with The Militti Group at Morgan Stanley Wealth Management. “[For] the wealthy and those who have properly saved for health care and other retirement costs, there is less to like and greater confusion about government-mandated health care. Moreover, those considered wealthy will be helping foot the bill of this epic legislation,” he says, explaining that a Medicare tax increase and additional taxes on taxable investment income have been instated, and other proposals are pending. “In my opinion, there is little doubt higherincome earners are going to be paying more in taxes. Higher-income earners need to be aware of future tax proposals on the table.” On the other hand, Militti points out, some Americans will clearly benefit financially from the legislation. “The poor, the lower middle class, the longterm unemployed, and those with pre-existing conditions will benefit the most, and that’s by design,” Militti says. “The entire premise for government-mandated health care is to provide taxpayer-financed subsidies for those who, otherwise, cannot provide for themselves.”

www.OmahaMagazine.com

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EJ Militti

EJ Militti is a Financial Advisor with The Militti Group at Morgan Stanley Wealth Management. The information contained in this article is not a solicitation to purchase or sell investments. Any information presented is general in nature and not intended to provide individually tailored investment advice. The strategies and/or investments referenced may not be suitable for all investors as the appropriateness of a particular investment or strategy will depend on an investor’s individual circumstances and objectives. Investing involves risks and there is always the potential of losing money when you invest. The views expressed herein are those of the author and may not necessarily reflect the views of Morgan Stanley Smith Barney LLC, Member SIPC, or its affiliates. Morgan Stanley Smith Barney LLC (“Morgan Stanley”), its affiliates, and Morgan Stanley Financial Advisors or Private Wealth Advisors do not provide tax or legal advice. This material was not intended or written to be used, and it cannot be used, for the purpose of avoiding tax penalties that may be imposed on the taxpayer. Clients should consult their tax advisor for matters involving taxation and tax planning and their attorney for matters involving trust and estate planning and other legal matters. www.BestOfOmaha.com

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60PLUS health Story by Susan Meyers • Photo by Bill Sitzmann Joshua L. Woelk, M.D., urogynecologist and pelvic reconstructive surgeon, Methodist Physicians Clinic Women’s Center

Women don’t have to live with

Uterine Prolapse.

here’s no doubt about it—

our bodies change as we get older. But are all of these changes things we have to accept as a natural part of aging? Joshua L. Woelk, M.D., urogynecologist and pelvic reconstructive surgeon at Methodist Physicians Clinic Women’s Center, says no, especially when they interfere with quality of life. Many times there are medical solutions to these physical changes. Uterine prolapse is one such change. It can occur at any age but is more common in postmenopausal women who have had one or www.BestOfOmaha.com

more vaginal deliveries. The condition occurs when the pelvic floor muscles and ligaments weaken and stretch, causing the uterus to drop into the vagina, sometimes even protruding through the vagina. “Overall, we think it occurs in about half of all women; however, only about 10 percent of these women will be symptomatic,” says Dr. Woelk. Conditions such as obesity, chronic constipation, and chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) can cause strain on the muscles and connective tissue in a woman’s pelvis

and can increase her risk of developing uterine prolapse. Other risk factors include chronic coughing, prior pelvic surgery, genetic predisposition to weakness in connective tissue, or frequent heavy lifting. “Uterine prolapse is typically not a dangerous or serious issue,” he says. “If it is not causing discomfort or other problems, you don’t have to do anything. However, for a small group of women, the problem can be very uncomfortable, and it becomes a quality of life issue.” One woman described the sensation as feeling like she was sitting on an egg, recalls Dr. Woelk. Women may also feel a sensation of heaviness or pulling in their pelvis, urine leakage or retention, and trouble having a bowel movement. The protrusion of the uterus may become worse throughout the day and will cause many of these women to limit their normal activities due to discomfort and embarrassment. The problem can become more serious if it begins to cause urinary retention. In the most serious cases, uterine prolapse can cause urinary tract infections, back pain, and injury to the kidneys. Women with uterine prolapse have two treatment options. In the outpatient setting, they can be fitted with a rubber vaginal device called a pessary that is inserted into the vagina to hold up the uterus. The pessary must be taken out each week to clean and can be reinserted into the vagina by the patient. The second option is surgery involving either a vaginal hysterectomy and attachment of the top of the vagina to the uterosacral ligaments, or an abdominal hysterectomy and supporting the vagina with graft material to other ligaments in the pelvis. These procedures are long-term solutions that are especially popular among more active women so they don’t have to deal with it anymore, notes Dr. Woelk. Unfortunately, many women who could get help are too embarrassed to discuss it with their doctors, says Dr. Woelk. “This is not something you have to live with,” he says. “Your doctor can help you live a normal life again if you bring it to their attention.” september/october • 2013

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60PLUS style Story by Mary Anne Vaccaro • Photo by Jim Scholz

Big Names in Fashion Who Are Over 60

hen we think of fashion,

we think of designs for the young and beautiful. However, when we hear the names of big designers, fashion editors, and stylists, we don’t think about how old they are! The reason for that is because they are, in a way, ageless. The word fashion means “of the times,” and people in fashion are of the times. Their hair may gray and their bodies might get sloppy, but fashion designers, directors, editors, stylists, and all of the creators involved tune into the times and project to the future. The older they get, the more they know, and the better they are. They work hard and very long hours. Travel for many may seem glamorous, but it’s often grueling. Here are some of fashion’s biggest names, all still working and 60-plus years old: • Giorgio Armani brought his signature Italian style of menswear to America in the ’70s. Today he oversees the design of not only his menswear collections but also collections for women, the home, hotels, and more. S14 60PLUS

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•

• •

• • • •

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Christian Lacroix delighted fashionistas with his couture masterpieces in the ’80s and ’90s and just created a museum collection for Schiaparelli. Vera Wang is busier than ever in a world of design far beyond bridal now. Anna Wintour, editor-in-chief of Vogue, is the woman every designer wants to impress. Also at Vogue is Grace Coddington, who went from a ’60s and ’70s top model to a visionary as creative director of the magazine today. Vogue Italia editor Franca Sozzani is almost 64. Suzy Menkes, the most famous fashion reporter and journalist in the world, is almost 70. Photo journalist Bill Cunningham is 84. Donna Karan and Calvin Klein, both designers, are still active today and have expanded their empires beyond their dreams, I am sure. Tim Gunn, the guy from Project Runway and Parson’s School of Design, is “The

Word” to young designers. What he says is respected and taken as the best critique. • The Latin lady and gentleman of sophisticated American style, both years beyond 60, are Carolina Herrera and Oscar de la Renta. • Diane von Fürstenberg, famous for the wrap dress in the ’70s, has a fashion business today bigger than ever. • Ralph Lauren, a man with an eye for class and timeless elegance, is still at work after brain tumor surgery. • Tommy Hilfiger hasn’t let age stop him. His business expands every season. • Karl Lagerfeld, the designer at Chanel and Fendi and for his own collections, turned 80 this year. • Valentino Garavani claims to have made an exit from his world of couture, but all say that, at 81, he remains involved. • Max Azria is the man responsible for all the fun, young, and adorable BCBG collections, and he’s 64. • Betsey Johnson, 71, and Vivienne Westwood, 72, are still creating edgy, fun, and rock-star-wild designs. • Norma Kamali, who made high fashion of sweatpants and shirts in the ’80s, is still designing fabulous swimwear and sexy, signature dresses and sportswear. • Those beautiful Manolo Blahnik shoes we all love are designed by a man who is 71. • I adore the creative genius of Jean Paul Gaultier and Thierry Mugler’s understanding of structure and construction. • I just looked through 83-year-old Sonia Rykiel’s fall collection. It’s wonderful, ageless, timeless, and personal, with qualities that speak of a designer who understands women. I welcome your feedback and invite you to send questions to sixtyplus@omahapublications. com. Mary Anne Vaccaro is a designer and image consultant to businesses and individuals. She designed clothes and products in Omaha and New York and ran a fashion advertising business in five states. She writes and speaks about image, fashion, art, and style. maryannevaccaro.com invisibleapron.com www.OmahaMagazine.com