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ON THE RADAR Compiled by Tiann Nantais

U N ITE D WAY

For the sixth year in a row, the University of Guelph has raised more than $600,000 in its United Way fundraising campaign. Exceeding its goal by $12,000 this year, U of G raised $632,000 in just one month.

CAN NAB I S

A retail cannabis store will open in the city of Guelph when the drug becomes legalized and regulated this summer. According to Mayor Cam Guthrie, a location for the store will not be determined until the province has consulted with the community. Ontario-based grower Aphris has also signed a five-year agreement to supply Shoppers Drug Mart with cannabis, which will be sold to patients over the internet.

EYE TATTOO

The Ontario government has added a ban on eye tattoos to a proposed patient care bill after an Ottawa woman suffered vision loss from a scleral pigmentation procedure. The woman sought out a cosmetic procedure to have her corneas tattooed purple, and has been suffering from pain, infection, and vision loss for over three months.

SUPREME COURT

Alberta-based judge Sheilah Martin has been nominated to the Supreme Court of Canada by Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.

Martin’s legal career spans three decades, during which time she served on the Court of Queen’s Bench of Alberta, the Courts of Appeal of Alberta, the Northwest Territories, and Nunavut, and she has done exceptional work on Indigenous issues, education, and equality.

Index News ............................................. 03 Arts & Culture ............................ 06 Sports & Health ......................... 10 Life & Innovation ..................... 16 Bee Campus ..................................19 Opinion .......................................... 20 Internet of Things ..................... 22 Editorial ........................................ 23 Fun page ....................................... 24 Comics ............................................. 26

It could take between five and seven years to progress from initial trial to functional chemotherapy. | PHOTO PROVIDED BY JIM UNIACKE

Professor Jim Uniacke has studied hypoxia in cancerous tumours for nearly a decade. | PHOTO BY PEACHES CHAMBERLAIN

U of G professor discovers groundbreaking cancer protein A look at recent research conducted on campus P E AC H E S C H A M B E R L A I N U OF G PROFESSOR Jim Uniacke and his lab have been making waves recently in the world of cancer research. The groundbreaking study, which has now been published in the scientific journal Oncogene, focused on studying hypoxia — low oxygen levels — in cancerous tumors. The research done by Dr. Uniacke and his team resulted in the discovery of a novel protein, now known as cadherin-22, which has shown potential to have enormous implications in the treatment of many cancers, mainly due to the pivotal role this protein appears to play in tumor metastasis.

In an interview with The Ontarion, Professor Uniacke outlined the role of cadherin-22 and the potential this discovery may have in future therapeutic treatments. “It has been known for decades now that solid cancer tumours have regions of low oxygen because these are not normal organs in your body, they arise later in life, and they don’t get a proper blood supply,” Uniacke explained. On the importance of this research, Uniacke said, “We care about these hypoxic areas because they’re actually the most aggressive cancer cells [...]. They’re the ones that resist treatment, they resist chemotherapy, they resist radiation therapy, and hypoxia actually promotes metastasis cells to move and leave the primary tumours and make other tumours in your body.”

This protein, cadherin-22, plays a critical role in maintaining the structure of cancer cells. Uniacke stated that, “You

put a cancer cell in very low oxygen, it starts to make cadherin-22, which allows it to stick to other hypoxic cells; and we found that this is how these hypoxic cores of tumours hold […] producing a basic scaffolding for the tumor to keep growing on itself.” Not only this, says Uniacke, but this protein also appears to be very important to the rapid spread of cancerous cells, commonly referred to as metastasis: “We found that cadherin-22 is not only required for holding hypoxic cancer cells together in the tumor, but helping them move as a group as well.”

During this study, Uniacke and his molecular biology lab were able to genetically engineer cancerous cells that didn’t produce cadherin-22, and the results were incredible.

“What we found was that it can’t make any tumors anymore, because it can’t stick to other cancer cells,” he said, proving this research could very well act as

Cadherins are a superfamily and people know how to block them.

a groundbreaking first step in developing more effective cancer treatments.

This protein manifests itself on the outer surface of cancer cells, thus allowing it to bind to other cadherin-22 containing cells, and making it susceptible to potential drug treatments. “The promising thing,” stated Uniacke, “is these cadherins are a superfamily and people know how to block them. There actually are therapeutics out there that block other cadherins for a variety of processes, so it wouldn’t be unexpected to be able to easily find a small molecule inhibitor of cadherin-22.” Uniacke also stated that if all goes well, to progress from initial discovery to a functional chemotherapy treatment, the process would take between five and seven years.

Dr. Uniacke has been studying hypoxia and the role it plays in cancer cells for nearly ten years now. With the help of graduate students, especially Nicole Kelly and Joseph Varga, Uniacke has been able to make these significant discoveries regarding cadherin-22, in just three years.

With a previous background in molecular and cellular biology, he found himself venturing into the area of cancer research in order to use his knowledge and research skills for the greater good. “My passion really came through using my interest in fundamental molecular biology, but then applying it to helping people.”

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One in 10 drugs sold in developing countries are fake WHO reports counterfeit drugs responsible for deaths of thousands of children CAELAN BEARD

IN A REPORT released last week, the World Health Organization (WHO) estimates that one in 10 medical drugs that are purchased in low and middle-income countries is either “substandard or falsified.” These products include pills, vaccines, and diagnostic kits.

The WHO classifies counterfeit drugs as products that:

• Have not been approved by regulators • Fail to meet quality standards • Deliberately misrepresent an ingredient These drugs may fail to prevent and cure disease and could even cause death.

According to the report, the problem of counterfeit drugs is likely

responsible for the deaths of tens of thousands of children every year.

Experts estimate that the counterfeit drugs may be responsible for the deaths of between 72,000 and 169,000 children from pneumonia and 116,000 from malaria each year. Despite the high numbers, the WHO has said that the cases of counterfeit drugs that have been found so far are only a “small fraction” of the problem. Estimates say that countries are spending about $30 billion on counterfeit drugs, CBC reports.

Though it is a global problem, counterfeit drugs most often affect poor countries. In addition to causing harm, counterfeit products mean that vulnerable individuals, who can barely afford medication

in the first place, are spending money on drugs that may exacerbate, rather than cure, the illness.

These products also pose a threat to drug resistance. In a UN News report, Mariângela Simão, the assistant director-general for Access to Medicines, Vaccines and Pharmaceuticals at the WHO, says that the falsified medicines “are a threat to antimicrobial resistance, adding to the worrying trend of medicines losing their power to treat.”

There is a definite profitability to making counterfeit drugs, particularly at times of outbreaks, where there may be a dr ug shortage. UN News states that globalization also makes it harder to regulate medical products, as online pharmacies can easily avoid quality control.

The WHO is asking governments to take urgent action, and Simão posits that in order to prevent the trafficking of counterfeit drugs and improve detection and response, countries will need to cooperate regionally and globally.

Fa k e D R U G S

BY THE NUMBERS

1 in 10 drugs purchased in low and middle-income countries is either “substandard or falsified.”

72,000 - 169,000 estimated child deaths from pneumonia due to counterfeit drugs. 116,00 children from malaria each year.

30 billion dollars spent on counterfeit drugs by countries each year.

Canadian workforce more educated than ever says 2016 census What this means for students: past, present, and future AMIR EBLAN

a bachelor’s degree in Canada, while just under a third of refugees increase their education levels after arriving in Canada.

Canadians Aged 25-64 with a post Secondary Education

It is clear that postsecondary education rates are growing at a steady pace, but what do these numbers mean for U of G students?

Applied human nutrition student, Mark Emode, said that higher education among Canadians has become so common that students are worried about finding jobs after school.

“Becoming successful nowadays has to do with people who are more creative, well-rounded, and take the opportunity of the many resources we are exposed to in life,” Emode said in an interview with The Ontarion.

U of G student Maddalena Cittadini said that there are too many people going for the same end goal, which makes everything more competitive.

“Most of my peers want to go to law or med school. Everyone’s applying for these higher education opportunities, but not everyone can have that reality,” said Cittadini.

Although a majority of Canadians have chosen to improve their job prospects by getting a postsecondary education, they are not under the impression that finding a job will be a walk in the park.

100 80

Percentage

THE 2016 CENSUS has produced some staggering statistics, with major implications for current and future post-secondary students. According to Statistics Canada, a majority of Canadians have now completed a post-secondary education.

According to the most recent release of census data, over 54 per cent of Canadians between the ages of 25 and 64 have completed a post-secondary education, up from 48.3 per cent in 2006.

This means that just over half of Canadians now have some sort of post-secondary education, the highest level among industrialized nations, the CBC reports.

Although there has been a leap in individuals pursuing post-secondary education and training in general, there are notable differences between Canadian men and women. The census data found that there was a significant increase in the number of young women who have a bachelor’s degree, up 8 per cent from the past decade. Statistics Canada also reported that not only do more women than men have a bachelor’s

degree, but women are also more likely to have a doctorate.

A mong young men, it was found that the highest growth rate came from those who had achieved an apprenticeship certificate, increasing to 7.8 per cent from 4.9 per cent. However, women with an apprenticeship certificate remained relatively stable over the past decade, according to the CBC. “Young men have responded to the employment opportunities and earnings incentives in the trades,” says John Zhao of Statistics Canada, “The fastest growth in earnings has been for men in these sectors.”

Another interesting point of contention regarding results from the 2016 census includes earnings among individuals in different fields of study. Men in the science, technology, engineering, and mathematics fields earned 23.9 per cent more than those with a degree in business, humanities, health, arts, social sciences, or education, according to the CBC. The census also found that graduates in the nursing, engineering, education, and information technology fields were more likely to work in their fields of study, while those with an arts, humanities, or social sciences degree were more likely to work in jobs for which they were overqualified.

The numbers also show that a majority of new immigrants have

70 60 54%

50 48.3% 40 30 20 10 0 2006

2016

YEAR

CONGRATULATIONS! The winner of the $50 gift card courtesy of Hospitality Services is ...

Nicholas Cooper Head on over to The Ontarion’s office (UC 264) Monday to Friday between 9 a.m. and 4 p.m. to pick up your prize.

UNDERGRADUATE RESEARCH ASSISTANSHIPS SUMMER 2018 Exciting opportunities exist for students interested in summer work under two unique summer research programs.

The NSERC Undergraduate Summer Research Awards (USRA) and Undergraduate Research Assistantships (URA) are available for the summer of 2018. The positions are 16 weeks in length.

USRA and URA Position Descriptions are posted on the respective websites USRA (NSERC)

URA

For more information see:www.uoguelph.ca/registrar/studentfinance/index.cfm?usra/index STUDENT ELIGIBILITY

For more information see:www.uguelph.ca/registrar/studetnfinance/index.cfm?ura/index STUDENT ELIGIBILITY



Must be a Canadian citizen or permanent resident of Canada



Must be a Canadian citizen or permanent resident of Canada



Must be registered full-time at the time of application in a baccalaureate program in natural science or engineering. Normally students participating in this program are students at the Univeristy of Guelph but students from other institutions who meet the academic criteria are also eligible.



Must be currently registered in an undergraduate degree program

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Must have a cumulative average of at least a ‘B-’ standing (>70%) during the course of their undergraduate study.



Must have a cumulative average of at least a 70%, however departments may have additional academic criteria above this minimum. This condition may be waived at the discretion of the hiring faculty member.

Must have a complete and error free OSAP (or applicable provincial/territory student assistance program) application on file at the time of application.



There are no conditions of financial need.



Must have demonstrated financial need as determined by the submission of the NAF for URA



Must have completed at least the first two semesters of a baccalaureate program.



Must return to study in an undergraduate degree program in Fall 2018.



Must not have started a graduate program at the time of the award.

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Must be engaged in full-time research during the time of the award.

Must be engaged in full-time research during the tenure of the position. However, a student may register as a part-time student (up to 1.0 credits) during the award period at the discretion of the supervisor.

STUDENT APPLICATION

STUDENT APPLICATION

Forward a complete application to the respective department/unit. Complete applications Consist of: a)NSERC’s Form 202- Part 1 (now an on line application)-refer to the NSERC website: http://www.nserc-crsng.gc.ca/OnlineServices-ServicesEnLigne/Index_eng.asp b) The University’s Form 2 Student Profile (printed form Student Financial Services documents page c) Attach and unofficial summary of grades* (*student who are offered a USRA position must submit an official transcript to their Supervisor once the position has been offered)

1.

Submit a URA Financial Need Assessment form (NAF) to Student Financial Services for assessment, beginning December 11, 2017.

2.

SFS will assess financial need and notifying students of their eligibility. Once an approval email is received students should forward a complete application to the respective hiring department/unit. Complete applications consist of: a)

The University’s Form 2Student Profile( printed form Student Financial Services web page)

b)

Attach the confirmation of financial need notification (email provided by SFS).

c)

Attach an unofficial summary of grades

SELECTION PROCEDURE The Department/unit makes decisions on the applicants and selects for either a USRA or URA beginning March 6, 2017 URA & USRA APPLICATIONS MUST BE SUBMITTED TO THE DEPARTMENTS NO LATER THAN FEBRUARY 27, 2018

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Tommy Wiseau roped Greg Sestero into starring in one of the worst movies ever. Now Sestero’s book about the experience has been adapted by James Franco. | ILLUSTRATION BY CORBEN GRANT

The Room’s Greg Sestero triumphs with a story of failure Author of The Disaster Artist comes to Kitchener-Waterloo W I L L W E L L I N G TO N THERE ARE A LOT of weird things going on in The Room, the totally incompetent 2003 melodrama that has become one of the biggest cult films of all time. Many of them, of course, come back to Tommy Wiseau, the shaggy-haired oddball who wrote, produced, and directed the film — in addition to starring in it as Johnny, a noble banker who is betrayed when his “future wife” Lisa (Juliette Danielle) and his best friend Mark (Greg Sestero) strike up an affair.

But the brilliant thing about The Room is that every element contributes to its strangeness. Sestero’s incongruous underacting, for instance, is the perfect foil to Wiseau’s over-the-top nonsense.

Sestero, who befriended Wiseau in an acting class in San Francisco in the late ’90s, is as subdued in reality as he is in the movie, like a man who is used to his life resembling a waking dream. He fell backwards into fame when The Room became a Rocky Horror-level

cult hit over the course of the 2000s. He embraced the phenomenon, writing a book, The Disaster Artist, about the making of the movie with journalist Tom Bissell.

“Tom wrote an article in Harper’s Magazine that was really terrific.

It intellectualized The Room and took Tommy [Wiseau] seriously,” said Sestero, in a phone interview.

“And that’s exactly what I wanted to do — to write a book that was first rate about something that was considered fifth rate.”

That book has now become a major movie of its own, directed by James Franco (James plays Wiseau while his brother Dave plays Sestero). As glowing reviews for The Disaster Artist roll in, it seems that Wiseau and Sestero have finally, in a very roundabout way, made it.

At the very least, Sestero says, “It’s exciting to be part of something that is actually looked upon as a good film.”

This year may mark a new chapter in their careers — Wiseau and

Sestero even co-star in an upcoming movie, the dark comedy Best F(r)iends, due to be released in 2018.

But while the release of The Disaster Artist has Sestero walking red carpets, he hasn’t forgotten the small cinemas and cult audiences that made it possible. Later this month, Sestero will appear at the Princess Cinemas in KitchenerWaterloo for two sold-out shows, presenting an exclusive behind the scenes documentary and a reading of The Room’s first draft.

Sestero tells me he enjoys the appreciative audiences at these intimate events, and I ask him if he ever gets any really weird questions. “The whole experience has been weird, so it’s par for the course,” he replies.

An Evening with Greg Sestero runs at the Princess Cinemas on Thursday, Dec. 14.

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Ajay Heble receives $2 million to build an “ImprovLab” Love of music has guided English professor’s long career B R A DY PAT T E R S O N

an enduring and powerful influence in Professor Ajay Heble’s life. “I grew up in a very musical household. My dad was a classical Indian musician,” said Heble. “He played sitar and was a classical Indian vocalist. He was very actively involved [in the community] even though he was a professor of mathematics.”

Sometimes, concerts took place in their very own home. “At the time I didn’t think anything of it,” said Heble. “I thought ‘Oh these are just things that happen,’ but in fact, now I realize they were very special. These were amazing, world-class musicians who happened to [play] concerts in my parents’ house.”

This momentum continued into his teenage years when he was given the opportunity to study

MUSIC HAS BEEN

Ajay Heble attends a film screening at 10 Carden.

PHOTO BY BRADY PATTERSON

composition with Toronto classical composer Philip McConnell. In high school, Heble was studying music at a university level. This class also allowed him to connect with a small community of likeminded students to share music, perform, and grow. It proved to be a formative experience.

Though Heble’s academic career began in literary criticism, music always guided his perception.

While completing his PhD at the University of Toronto, he proposed

a dissertation on critical theory and jazz. Despite being rejected at the time, Heble would publish this project later under the title Landing on the Wrong Note. In the meantime, he wrote his dissertation on Canadian short story writer Alice Munro, who later won the Nobel Prize. “I like to joke that I was going to write on ‘the absence of jazz in Alice Munro,’” said Heble.

Having finished his PhD in Toronto, Heble applied to teach in the English department at the

University of Guelph. He was interviewed by the then-chair of the department Connie Rooke, who also co-founded the Eden Mills Writers’ Festival.

“I think I probably made some offhand comment [like] ‘I think I want to start a jazz festival…’ I suspect that’s why she hired me,” said Heble.

Rooke hired Heble, and in 1994 he started the Guelph Jazz Festival. At this point, it was purely an extracurricular endeavour, but that was soon to change.

1996 saw the advent of the Jazz Festival Colloquium, a series of talks and workshops. “I felt that the Colloquium helped to build an audience for this music….

Audience members who may be unfamiliar with the music get to hear the artists speak about it.”

Heble’s academic work gained a community focus.

Now into its third decade, the Guelph Jazz Festival eventually allowed Heble to expand his research to form the International Institute for Critical Studies in Improvisation (IICSI). “We now have about 40 community partners ranging from music festivals to art galleries to social service

organizations that run programs for at-risk and aggrieved populations,” said Heble.

Heble just received a grant of $2.03 million from the Canada Foundation for Innovation (CFI) to build an “ImprovLab” on campus.

“I’m imagining it as a roughly 300-seat facility with state-of-theart technology to enable real-time musical performance across geographical distance.”

This facility would also bridge the distance between academia and the community. “This would be a publicly-accessible, multi-use lab for presentation, broadcast, archiving, and analysis of improvised music and artistic practice across a variety of artistic media.

I imagine it to be a kind of hub where artists and community collaborators can come into contact with each other.”

Communities flourish when individuals listen and respond to one another: skills which are necessary to improvisation. “I think that people are too focused on their own sense of individual autonomy.

We don’t pay enough attention to what is going on around us,” said Heble. “I think letting go of that a little bit is really important.”

The Burning Hell sings subtle songs on sombre subjects Mathias Kom’s dense, funny lyrics

When I say I’m unemployed, it’s because I don’t believe [Canadian] society values art and music the way that we should.

weave politics into narratives W I L L W E L L I N G TO N

FOR THE PAST DECADE ,

Mathias Kom has been unemployed. At least, that’s what The Burning Hell frontman and songwriter tells interviewers. “Anyone observing any band can see that it’s a shitton of work,” said Kom. I spoke to Kom, bushy-bearded and dressed in flannel, on a Friday night in the front room of Silence in downtown Guelph, where The Burning Hell was about to play in support of their new record Revival Beach. They’ve been touring the record across Europe and Canada for several months, playing something like 70 shows.

“There’s fun to be had,” said Kom. “But touring is work, recording is work, writing songs is work.

It’s all labour — but society doesn’t view it that way. So when I say I’m unemployed, it’s because I don’t believe [Canadian] society values art and music the way that we should.”

It makes sense that Kom would comment on the devaluation of

The Burning Hell’s lineup has changed many times. The band played Guelph as a trio.

PHOTO BY MEGAN SULLIVAN

artistic labour by ironically embracing it — he’s developed a knack for addressing tricky subjects indirectly. Revival Beach makes potent statements on pressing issues like police brutality (“Nurse & Patient”), climate change (“The River”), and online discourse (“The Troll”). But those loaded statements are embedded in stories rich in detail, wit, and character.

“I wish I could write a direct political song,” said Kom. “I

admire those songs so much, and they feel so real and sincere when I hear Woody Guthrie or Pete Seeger singing them. But when I try and do it I just feel like it’s a sham, or I can’t pull it off. But I just have a different style — everything needs to be sprinkled with a little bit of humour or a story behind it.”

Kom’s wordy tunes shone during The Burning Hell’s Silence set, which dug into their discography

as far back as 2011’s Flux Capacitor.

Kom took the lead on guitar and vocals, with Ariel Sharratt and Darren Browne rounding out the trio. Sharratt tore it up on the bass clarinet before moving behind the kit for the second half of the set, while Brown filled out the sound with bouzouki and bass guitar.

At the tail end of a long tour, the band demonstrated mastery of their material — particularly in “The Troll,” where Kom and

Sharratt switched instruments mid-song. Comfortable in the intimate space, Kom and crew freely interrupted the tunes to offer commentary, tease each other, and interact with the audience.

Their assured performance seemed far removed from Kom’s description of the year, a decade prior, when he quit his job teaching history to become a musician.

“It was pretty hand-to-mouth,” said Kom. But it was worth it. “I had probably the best year that I’d ever had, that year, just playing music and travelling around Canada. So I just kept doing it.”

Some folks say that living well is the best revenge. If that’s the case, maybe The Burning Hell doesn’t need to make an explicit political statement. Their career is statement enough.

Revival Beach is out now via BB*Island.

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TH E O NTA R I O N

Filmmakers Jared (right) and Michelle Brock (centre) hang out in The Bookshelf Cinema following a preview screening of their new film. | PHOTO BY WILL WELLINGTON

Local filmmakers’ new documentary celebrates Josiah Henson Forgotten abolitionist inspired Uncle Tom’s Cabin W I L L W E L L I N G TO N

JOSIAH HENSON is not a household name in the province of Ontario — not yet, anyway.

Local documentary filmmakers Jared and Michelle Brock, who make films as a not-for-profit under the name The Brock Stewardship, are aiming to change that with a new film. Josiah traces Henson’s life from his birth in 1789 in Maryland to his arrival in Canada in 1830.

Henson was born into slavery — his first memory was of his father being brutally beaten — and later started a settlement for former slaves in what would become Dresden, Ont. He also inspired the character of Uncle Tom, the noble protagonist of Harriet Beecher Stowe’s 1852 abolitionist novel Uncle Tom’s Cabin. (The association of “Uncle Tom” with subservience and “race traitors” comes from bastardized versions of the original narrative.)

The Brocks were inspired to pursue the story after researching

Josiah Henson’s story helped spark the American Civil War. PHOTO COURTESY OF THE BROCK STEWARDSHIP

Stowe’s novel and discovering that the inspiration for Uncle Tom lived in Ontario — and that no one knew about him. Jared eventually became so invested in Henson’s story that he literally wrote the book on it. His biography of Henson, The Road to Dawn, hits shelves in May. “I filled in all the gaps,” said Jared, “and that’s why [the film] seems so seamless. Whatever we didn’t have, I could speak to it.”

The Brock Stewardship screened an early cut of their documentary this past Saturday at the Bookshelf Cinema. The screening served both to gather feedback — audience members were asked to fill out a detailed questionnaire to

help with the final edit — and to network with politicians and teachers.

“This is to get educators, to get political people behind this film,” said producer Dave McSporran.

I n 2 016 , t he f i l m m a k er s received a grant from the Ontario Trillium Foundation to screen the 39-minute film in over 50 local classrooms throughout this coming Black History Month, ahead of a wider release in May. The filmmakers are also preparing additional resources so that teachers will be able to focus a whole week’s worth of classes on Henson’s life.

The screening was followed by a Q&A session that kept Jared

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Henson descendents Steph Johnson, Sandra Vick, and Terrance Vick chat after the screening. | PHOTO BY WILL WELLINGTON

on his toes, as audience members pressed him on whether the end of the film failed to acknowledge Canada’s own history of racism.

Some of Henson’s descendants, Steph Johnson and Terrance Vick, who appeared in the film, attended the Saturday screening. Johnson appreciated the vigour of the postfilm discussion. “ The government is really trying hard to focus on reconciliation, especially with First Nations people. I think we really need to do that with black Canadians too,” said Johnson. “Canadian history wasn’t as peachy keen as we like to let on.”

These discussions are good

practice for the filmmakers too.

McSporran indicated that far more unpleasant conversations are sure to come as the film reaches a wider audience. “ We’re going to get stones thrown, so we just want to make sure that we’re ready for it,” said McSporran. “Racism is real, and lots of people don’t want a story like this.”

That’s exactly why telling that story is so important. “This is about racial reconciliation,” said Jared. “It’s about history. It’s about teaching our local kids stories of their local heroes. When they hear ‘Uncle Tom,’ I would love them to think ‘superhero.’”

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I S SU E 18 3.14 | A RT S & CU LTU R E

TH E O NTA R I O N .CO M PHOTO COURTESY OF FLICKR

The best renditions of 12 holiday classics

PHOTO COURTESY OF WIKIMEDIA COMMONS

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Holiday songs for the 21st century For when you get sick

There’s nothing like the

of the classics

old standbys HAMA AD SHEHZAD SARAH SEUKERAN

Bing Crosby in White Christmas.

DMX’s “Rudolph” cover just came out.

For every nostalgic holiday classic, there’s a hundred different versions. We’ve done the sifting for you and picked out our favourite version of each classic on the list.

FELIZ NAVIDAD

Kanye West — Christmas in Harlem (2010)

WHITE CHRISTMAS

PLEASE COME HOME FOR CHRISTMAS

Written by José Feliciano Original: José Feliciano Our Pick: Kacey Musgraves

Written by Irving Berlin Original: Bing Crosby Our Pick: Bing Crosby

Written by Charles Brown and Gene Redd Original: Charles Brown Our Pick: Etta James

BABY, IT’S COLD OUTSIDE

Written by Frank Loesser Original: Frank Loesser and Lynn Garland Our Pick: Kelly Clarkson ft. Ronnie Dunn

IT’S BEGINNING TO LOOK A LOT LIKE CHRISTMAS

Written by Meredith Willson Original: Perry Como ft. The Fontane Sisters Our Pick: Perry Como ft. The Fontane Sisters

RUDOLPH, THE RED-NOSED REINDEER

Written by Johnny Marks Original: Harry Brannon Our Pick: Ella Fitzgerald

Featuring an insanely catchy hook from Teyana Taylor, a great verse in classic Kanye fashion, and a sweet little verse from CyHi the Prynce, this track is a modern Christmas classic.

Sufjan Stevens — Christmas Unicorn (2012)

Indie darling Sufjan Stevens has released nearly three hours of Christmas music, but this is his masterpiece. This powerhouse of a track clocks in at over 12 minutes, and includes beautiful flutes, electronic sprinkles, and a Joy Division sample. Along with singing about magical unicorns, Stevens finds a way to criticize American culture.

This song truly is a miracle.

CHRISTMAS WALTZ

Written by Sammy Cahn and Jule Styne Original: Frank Sinatra Our Pick: Peggy Lee

JINGLE BELL ROCK

Written by Joe Beal and Jim Boothe Original: Bobby Helms Our Pick: Bobby Helms

HOLLY JOLLY CHRISTMAS

Written by Johnny Marks Original: The Quinto Sisters Our Pick: Burl Ives

THE CHRISTMAS SONG (MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU)

Written by Bob Wells and Mel Tormé Original: Nat King Cole Our Pick: Nat King Cole

HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY LITTLE CHRISTMAS

ROCKIN’ AROUND THE CHRISTMAS TREE

Written by Johnny Marks Original: Brenda Lee Our Pick: Brenda Lee

Written by Hugh Martin and Ralph Blane Original: Judy Garland Our Pick: Frank Sinatra

LCD Soundsystem — Christmas Will Break Your Heart (2015)

Sleigh bells are the bookends on this depressing Christmas tune that marked the comeback of this legendary dance-punk group. This song is perfect for the winter S A D B O Y in all of us, with defeated verses that build up to an epic arrangement of strings and a middle-aged man yelling at the listener.

DMX — Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer (2017)

Though recordings of this have been in circulation for years, Spotify granted everybody’s wish recently by releasing a studio

version of this beautiful cover of the classic Christmas song. The sleigh bell sample throughout the song is an especially nice touch.

Julian Casablancas — Christmas Treat (2009)

Strokes’ frontman Casablancas became a pioneer in modern-day indie rock thanks to The Strokes’ debut album Is This It. On this track, he treats the world with a Christmas song very reminiscent of the early Strokes discography.

Vampire Weekend — Holiday (2010)

Indie pop sweethearts Vampire Weekend included this sweet little track on their second studio album, Contra. It isn’t explicitly a winter holiday track, but fits in perfectly with the best of them.

Mac Demarco — White Christma$ (2015)

Canadian indie/lo-fi artist Mac Demarco adds his personal sound to this Christmas classic. The song features Mac’s signature psychedelic guitar sounds, including a nice little solo.

Andrew Bird — Auld Lang Syne (2012)

Classically trained indie/folk artist Andrew Bird’s rendition of this centuries-old New Year’s song is wonderful, complete with violin solo. Fun fact: “auld lang syne” can be roughly translated to “for old times’ sake.”

Three classic holiday movies to keep your Christmas weird Forget Rudolph and Frosty — here’s John McClane and Gizmo K AT I E S TO K E S

Christmas is a time for decorating the Christmas tree, buying Christmas gifts, bombarding everyone with more Christmas music than they can handle, and watching all the classic Christmas movies you own. But do you find yourself bored watching the same holiday specials every year? Fret not, and try one of these holiday classics you may have overlooked.

DIE HARD

Starring Bruce Willis, this movie features many charming holiday moments, like a local office holiday party getting broken up by terrorists who take the party-goers hostage. While this movie may be overlooked as a Christmas special, many families still indulge in this festive, action-packed film.

GREMLINS

On a Christmas Eve that no one

Gizmo, John McClane, and Lumpy: three wise men for a new era. | PHOTO EDITED BY ALORA GRIFFITHS

would forget, adorable little creatures called Gremlins decide to have a holiday party of their own and wreak havoc throughout the town of Kingston Falls. Watch the movie, just don’t feed any Gremlins after midnight!

STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL

And finally, another holiday movie that often gets forgotten is the infamous Star Wars Christmas musical, which first graced TV screens in 1978. If you’ve been thinking about enjoying some Star Wars this December, but don’t

want to spend money on Last Jedi tickets, then look no further. This Wookiee-enriched film features beloved characters Han Solo and Chewbacca attempting to visit Chewbacca’s homeland for the holidays, only to be rudely interrupted by the Galactic Empire.

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SPORTS & HEALTH THE ONTARION

1 1 | WOR LD HOCK E Y JUNI ORS

1 2 | HOL IDAY STRESS

@ Ont ar i on _ S p o r t s

On the road to reviving boxing’s glory days Former IBF champion, David Lemieux, challenging WBO middleweight champion for belt JA N A N S H OJA D O O S T

that there is no place for boxing in the modern era of sports — that it is declining every year and is on the verge of extinction.

With his upcoming fight in Laval, Que. on Dec. 16, and the World Boxing Organization (WBO) middleweight belt up for grabs, David Lemieux may do enough to not only make Canadian boxing relevant, but also resurrect worldwide boxing, putting it on the right track back to the glory it once had.

The Montreal native has had an impressive run throughout his professional boxing career.

With 38 wins on his record, 33 of which have been knockouts, David Lemieux always brings an immense danger every time he steps into the ring.

Lemieux initially asserted his dominance in the middleweight roster in 2015, when he

SOME PEOPLE ARGUE

first obtained the International Boxing Federation (IBF) middleweight title for himself. To make his first title defense, Lemieux was offered to fight for a title unification, fighting the World Boxing Association ( W BA), World Boxing Championship (WBC), and the International Boxing Organization (IBO) middleweight champion at the time, Gennady “GGG” Golovkin.

Things didn’t go Lemieux’s way that night, and he lost the belt that he had obtained just one fight prior.

But now, many things have changed. Lemieux has been able to make a strong comeback, winning all of his fights since his loss to Golovkin. Golovkin is still the champion, but to become an undisputed one, he needs one more belt — the WBO middleweight championship. It’s not as easy as it sounds for Golovkin

G RYPH O N SCO RE BOARD Compiled by Matteo Cimellaro at home. The Gryphons, now 5-5, go into the winter break at .500.

MEN’S BASKETBALL

Gryphons 86, Golden Gaels 88 The Gr y phons lost at home after Queen’s drained the buzzer beater to complete their fourth quarter comeback. The loss drops the Gryphons to a 2-8 record going into the holiday break.

WOMEN’S BASKETBALL

Gryphons 52, Golden Gaels 74 The Gryphons three-game winning streak ended following a loss

MEN’S HOCKEY

Gryphons 6, Varsity Blues 4 Gryphons 1, Lancers 4 The Gryphons won on the road in Toronto increasing their win streak to nine games. The winning would end in Windsor, as the Lancers snapped the streak. The Gryphons now sit at the top of the OUA West Division tied for first with Ryerson and York.

because Billy Joe Saunders is the current WBO champion, and Lemieux, not Golovkin, is set to challenge Saunders for his belt.

Lemieux can easily win over Saunders if he outsmarts him in the ring. He needs to surprise Saunders by faking his jabs and sneaking in power shots, which will greatly reduce Saunders’ time to think and react. It would be difficult for Lemieux to finish Saunders by a knockout, so he needs to confuse Saunders as much as he can so that he is slow and unable to keep up with the pace.

Given that Lemieux defeats Saunders on fight night, things will get interesting. Lemieux can revive his rivalry with Golovkin once again. If Lemieux gets past Saunders, Golovkin will step in the ring with Lemieux for a chance to steal his belts and unify them all — making him the middleweight champion of the world. Not only is this what his fans want, but this is also the opportunity of a lifetime for Lemieux. If he wins against Saunders, and then again in his rematch with Golovkin, he can finally legitimize himself as a champion — the one and only, the undisputed.

Height: 5’9 1/2” Reach: 70” | PHOTO COURTESY OF RINGSIDE REPORT

I S SU E 18 3.14 | S P O RT S & H E A LTH

TH E O NTA R I O N .CO M

11

World Junior Championship: a true Canadian tradition Why a junior hockey tournament means so much to us LESLIE THOMPSON

rolls around, I find myself getting as excited as, if not more excited than, everybody else for the holidays. I’m all about that Christmas music, those Christmas lights, and the cheesiness of holiday cheer. I love the excuse to spend time with family and friends, to eat good food, and to dress up in clothes I can’t wear any other time of year.

Perhaps my favourite part of the Christmas season is what comes right after. Yes, I’m talking about Boxing Day and New Year’s Eve — but maybe not for the reasons you think. Nevermind shopping, or champagne-popping, I’m thinking World Junior Hockey.

WHEN DECEMBER

THE TOURNAMENT’S HISTORY

Every holiday season, the International Ice Hockey Federation (IIHF) Ice Hockey World Junior Championships — known as the World Junior Championship (WJC) for short — runs from Dec. 26

through to the first week of January. The tournament is played in different locations across North America, Europe, and Russia, and consists of the top 10 national junior teams from around the world.

Canada has won the WJC sixteen times since it began in 1977, making them the country to have the most gold medals from the tournament.

Given Canada’s rich hockey history, it’s no surprise that Canadians are obsessed. No matter where the tournament is played, it can be counted upon that there will be a sea of red and white in the stands.

AN EMOTIONAL CANADIAN PASTIME

In Canada and the United States in particular, the WJC has become somewhat of a phenomenon. Over the years, the rivalry between the neighbouring countries has grown exponentially. The New Year’s Eve traditional game that ends the round robin is often between these two countries, and is one of the most watched games of the tournament outside of the finals. Finally, towards the end of the championship, the U.S. and Canada are often found battling it out for the top spot.

The tournament takes on an emotional meaning for Canadians because of the amount of fierce

NOTABLE PAST MEMBERS OF TEAM CANADA AT THE WJC INCLUDE:

• • • • • • •

The 2017-18 IIHF World Juniors Championships are set to begin in Buffalo.

Canada faces Finland on Boxing Day. | PHOTO COURTESY OF HOCKEY CANADA

national pride that goes along with it.

“Having the whole nation behind you, it’s going to be pretty cool,” Anthony Cirelli told the CBC in 2016, when the tournament was held in Toronto and Montreal.

The red and white jersey is a source of pride and confidence for the players and for Hockey Canada.

“Whenever we get 22 Canadians together with that Canadian jersey,” said VP of hockey operat ions S c ot t S a lmond in a n interview with the CBC, “I like our chances.”

However, it’s not just pride for our country that makes the tournament so great. I would argue that the hockey played by the national junior teams in this tournament can rival, perhaps even beat, that of the NHL. For the Canadian team, coming in second is not an option.

“We go into tournaments with only gold on our minds,” said Jordan Eberle in an interview with Hockey Canada. “Second isn’t good enough.”

I must admit that I have, more than once, found myself on the

Wayne Gretzky Doug Gilmour Steve Yzerman Sidney Crosby Jordan Eberle Ryan Ellis Taylor Hall

verge of tears because of either pride or disappointment. I’ve watched games in my grandparents’ living rooms in Newfoundland, in my best friend’s basement, at a bar, and on a ferry in the middle of the ocean. I listened in my friend’s car with my heart breaking in 2012 as Team Canada, led

by Jaden Schwartz, lost the game that would have taken them to the final. I screamed my head off in my friend’s basement in 2015 when Team Canada, led by Curtis Lazar, won in front of a sold-out crowd in Toronto, effectively breaking a five-year gold medal slump.

The disappointment that you can see on these teenage boys’ faces when they lose is heartbreaking.

But it’s all worth it when they win.

Let’s go, Canada!

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12

S P O RT S & H E A LTH

|

D ECEM B ER 07, 2017

TH E O NTA R I O N

Indoor sports you can play at home when the snow comes should also rearrange the furniture in the room so that you have the maximum amount of space to move around. Once you have that all done, grab your mini-sticks (you can also improvise and use wooden cooking spoons instead).

Set up the net using whatever you can find, then grab a friend and you’re all set.

A guide to all games “mini” MICHAEL CIMESA

is almost here and that means it’s time for making snowmen, giving gifts, and being merry. However, with winter also comes the end of playing sports outdoors, and that makes it pretty difficult to stay holly and jolly. Luckily, with a little improvisation, you can play all your favourite sports from the comfort of your own home.

THE WINTER SEASON

MINI-BASKETBALL

School your friends and family in a game of mini-something over the holidays. | PHOTO COURTESY OF FLICKR

MINI-HOCKEY

The rules for mini-hockey are pretty similar to regular-sized hockey, except that you have to

take a few extra precautions, like moving fragile decorations to another room where they won’t be smashed by a flying puck. You

For mini-basketball, the balls are a little too small to dribble, so you can implement a three-step rule, meaning after three steps you have to either shoot or pass the ball. Just like for mini-hockey, make sure you’ve removed any fragile decorations, and rearrange the furniture so that you have as

much space as possible. Set up some two- and three-point lines.

Instead of one-on-ones, switch it up with mini-basketball games like 21, P.I.G., or H.O.R.S.E. MINI-BOWLING

In order to successfully bowl in the comfort of your house you’re going to need a long stretch of floor — a hallway works great for this.

Next, you need a set of 10 plastic cups or water bottles to act as the pins. For the bowling ball, you can use a soccer ball you have lying around, or the mini-basketball from your mini-hoops set. Once it’s all set up, roll your ball down the lane and go for the strike. (Make a younger brother or sister reset the pins in between shots.)

How to find that holiday zen in the face of family stress Preparing for the holidays one breath at a time C O L L E E N FAVA

of the year again.

Many of us anticipate or start to feel anxiety building up about the holidays when we ask ourselves: • How am I going to relax over the break to help me be better in the New Year?

• How am I going to stay on track with my new health regimen?

• How will I manage everything I need to get done during this busy time?

• How am I going to address personal issues with family when it’s none of their business?

Here’s my question to you: What’s your plan to deal with all of this before it happens?

We have the power to make small changes that can help alleviate some stress and anxiety that comes up during the holidays. All it takes is some simple planning.

We all have patterns that shape our internal dialogue, and often we default to these patterns and accept them even before they recur. For example, a typical holiday family pattern could look something like this: your parents plan to host a holiday dinner at their house, but your estranged grandmother is also planning to host a dinner on the same night. Every year, you may be faced with the daunting task of which dinner to attend and how to please everyone.

Many times, even just thinking

IT’S THAT TIME

about these patterns can leave you feeling frustrated, sad, angry, or anxious.

Here are some tips on how to ignite change in your thought patterns and intentions.

1. Sit with the patterns

Be honest with yourself about how you may contribute to the patterns. Even just by sitting back and accepting the patterns, you are still playing a role in addressing the negativity.

2. Rewrite the patterns, literally

Given the above example, rewrite a holiday where your parents and grandmother ask you when would be best to host the holidays and/or where you contact each of them and suggest a time and date. Visualize how you may cope differently.

3 . Tal k to th e p e o p l e in yo ur l i fe w h o are a l s o af fe c te d

Talk to your siblings and friends and see how they feel. Come up with a plan together. For instance, decide on a special phrase that

We all have patterns that shape our internal dialogue.

means you would like to go home, or ask for their support during hard times.

4. Have strategies for when the patterns occur

If your family insists on everyone being together for ten hours, plan some time alone by going for a walk. Bring the dog if you need some company!

5. Limit your time being immersed in these patterns

It’s okay to put up boundaries for yourself.

6. Visualize how you’d like things to look ahead of time

Each day for one minute imagine how you’d like to feel during this time, visualizing yourself as happy and calm. If you are an emotional eater, plan ahead and bring healthy snacks with you to eat. Do whatever you need to help you stay grounded and feeling good.

7. Try to recognize your learning and growth

Self care, self love, self improvement. Keep going.

Remember, these patterns have likely been there for a long time, so it may take some practice before you see changes. Remember to celebrate even the smallest things that you accomplish. Be kind, patient, and nonjudgmental with yourself.

Be open to seeing what happens.

Notice how it feels to challenge yourself and to rework the old patterns for a healthier you.

Don’t drink and drive . | PHOTO COURTESY OF RAF MILDENHALL

PU B LI C S E RV I C E AN N O U N C E M E NT

Drinking responsibly over the holidays | M AT T E O C I M E L L A R O

ONCE EXAMS ARE OVER , freedom is here. Other than shift work that you may have picked up over the break, you’re free to do whatever — including getting smashed off the dinner wine. Before you do, it’s good to implement damage control so that you don’t ruin Grandma’s white, snowflake patterned tablecloth.

1. Pace yourself

Don’t try to keep up with your Aunt Helen, she’s a beast. You’re going to hurt yourself if you try.

Instead, slow down to your own speed. Maybe you should only drink one glass per hour if you hardly drink wine. Remember that vino creeps up.

2. Drink water

A good rule of thumb is one alcoholic drink deserves one full glass of water (i.e. Earth’s sweet nectar).

3. Eat a serving or two

The last thing you want to do is replace your holiday feast with a fourth glass of pinot.

4. Don’t mix if you’re not used to it

Colleen Fava is a mindfulness educator and registered psychotherapist practicing in downtown Guelph.

Don’t get ambitious if you never mix. And even if you do, be wary.

It’s a 45-minute drive back to your house from your grandparents’

place. Also don’t smoke that joint your stoner cousin offered you.

Mixing the dinner wine with the duty-free tequila your second cousin brought from Mexico isn’t a good idea either.

5. If you get sick: tell somebody

Don’t try to hide it — that may make it worse. Tell your immediate family if that tequila “wrecked you.” No shame in admitting you drank yourself under the dinner table. You just finished exams after all. You may become the butt of the joke for the rest of the night, but it’s cool, it’s family.

6. Be the designated driver

Give your parents and siblings a break and offer to drive so that they can have a couple. Chill out and drink tea or hot chocolate while your family celebrates. Show them this list before they start drinking too, so you don’t need to carry mom to the car after she falls asleep watching Christmas Vacation.

According to the Canadian Centre on Substance Use and Addiction, women should drink no more than three drinks and men should drink no more than four drinks in an evening.

SPECIALIZE IN ONE YEAR OR LESS • Autism and Behavioural Science • Brain Disorders Management • Concurrent Disorders • Mental Health and Disability Management

COMPLEMENT YOUR DEGREE WITH A GRADUATE CERTIFICATE.

Get future ready.

Apply today.

To learn more about these programs and other graduate certificates visit mohawkcollege.ca/gradstudies

FOOD B

FOOD INS A CSA employee sorts through food donations.

Giving back to your community How you can help the Guelph Student FoodBank help Gryphons

W

K AREN K . TRAN

hile the holidays may be advertised as a time of fun and excess, the reality of the season is that it isn’t a lot different from any other time of year. Those going through a hard time in November won’t suddenly have an easy December if everything remains the same. So, if you’re able to give back to your community in some way over the holidays, your generosity can make a huge difference to someone if not change the larger problem of food insecurity.

One local organization that you could donate to is the Guelph Student FoodBank (GSFB), a service that is for students, by students.

This service is run by the Central Student Association (CSA), thanks to two staff and more than 80 volunteers. They provide confidential emergency food access, free cooking classes, and workshops to current undergraduate and graduate students, as well as those who have graduated from U of G in the last six months.

“Many folks think it’s alright for students to be hungry, to live off of KD or peanut butter sandwiches, and some even have a ‘If I did, so can they’ mentality about being food insecure at university,” GSFB coordinator Sarah Vincett told The Ontarion in an email interview. “But it doesn’t have to, and shouldn’t be, that way. Students are equally as entitled to proper nutrition and access to quality foods as everyone else.”

Just as you cook a variety of meals and give yourself a treat every once in awhile, food bank visitors also deserve to enjoy their food. Before you donate, please ensure that the items haven’t expired.

“If you’re food insecure and the only food items available to you are expired, it may negatively impact your sense of self,” said Vincett. “Folks who are food insecure deserve fresh, healthy food.”

The most useful donation you can make to a food bank is cash.

Food banks can use this money to shop for their current demands and take advantage of sales at grocery stores.

And while the holiday season is a great reminder to take care of others, organizations like the Guelph Student FoodBank provide their services all year-round, which means that they require volunteer help and donations year-round as well. Donations are hugely appreciated over the holidays, but please keep in mind that the need doesn’t end when winter does. Consider donating regularly throughout the year.

“While it’s important to support food banks,” Vincett said, “it’s also important to take a critical look at the systemic inequalities that create situations resulting in folks being food insecure and to advocate for their change.”

The Guelph Student FoodBank is located at 620 Gordon St. at the Federal Annex Building on campus, and is open Monday to Friday from 12 p.m. to 6 p.m. during the fall and winter semesters, and Tuesday to Thursday from 12 p.m. to 5 p.m. during the summer months from May to August.

Donation items that the GSFB and other food banks appreciate include:

• • • • • •

Rice Canned tuna Pasta sauce Canned soup Tomato paste Personal hygiene items

Many food banks will also accept:

• Spices • Individually packaged snacks • Treats such as chocolates

BANKS &

SECURITY

Checking expiry dates on canned goods.

Are food banks a “bandaid” solution?

Experts say food banks fails to address Canada’s food insecurity problem CAELAN BEARD

A

Those who use the Guelph Student FoodBank get 30 points per month to spend on products. Users with dependents, such as children, recieve an additional 30 points per person. Canned items cost one point while other items such as fresh fruit vary in point value. For example, four apples are equal to one point.

PHOTOS BY ALORA GRIFFITHS

lthough food banks certainly aspire to a noble goal of feeding a community, public health experts say that food banks are a “band-aid” solution to the much larger problem of food insecurity in Canada.

Mary Ellen Prange, chair of the Food Insecurity Workgroup, told the CBC that the problem of food insecurity is much larger than food bank statistics suggest and that food banks are not solving this problem. According to Prange, “only about one in four households that experience food insecurity actually uses a food bank.” Prange further argues that food banks have created a secondary food system for impoverished people, but that long-term solutions are what’s needed.

Food banks were initially started in Canada in the 1980s and were meant to be a short-term solution to food insecurity during a recession.

Instead, they’ve morphed into a decades-long system of dependency.

According to statistics from Food Banks Canada, 13 per cent of Canadians live in a state of food insecurity, and over 850,000 people turn to food banks for help every month. Food bank use in Canada increased by an alarming 28 per cent between 2008 and 2016 — and the reasons behind this aren’t what you might think.

The HungerCount 2016 report, published by Food Banks Canada, found that one in six households that are helped are currently employed.

As well, more than one third of those who use food banks are

"Food banks alone are not a viable solution to ending hunger."

children and youth, and the high cost of housing is a key driving force behind food bank use — 66 per cent of food bank users pay market-level rent. The report summarizes that the root cause of hunger is low income, and that this consistently affects more than four million Canadians at any given time.

Food banks are an important way to help mitigate this need, and experts such as Prange say it is fine to donate to food banks.

However, what is needed more are solutions that address the root cause of food insecurity, namely income-based solutions. According to CBC, earlier this month, the Ontario Society of Nutrition Professionals in Public Health stated “food charity is an ineffective and counterproductive response to food security because it does not address the root cause of poverty.”

The HungerCount report put forward similar ideas on how to reduce the need for food banks in Canada. The report recommended a national poverty reduction strategy, a basic liveable income in Canada, a new deal for Canadians on social assistance, and significant new investments in Northern food security.

Food banks were never meant to be more than a short-term solution, and the drastic increase in food bank use over the past eight years makes it clear that food banks alone are not a viable solution to ending hunger. Food banks provide invaluable help to a great many people, but the problem of food insecurity is too big for them to solve alone. We need to start holding our government more accountable for failing to adequately address the problem of food insecurity. Greater action is needed to find real solutions to poverty in our country to ensure that no Canadian has to suffer from food insecurity.

16

LIFE & INNOVATION THE ONTARION

1 8 | B E I N G S I NG LE

1 9 | BEE CAMPUS

@ t h e ont ar i o n

Five holiday traditions, straight from The Rock “Mother was there, and some mummers, too...”

LESLIE THOMPSON

rich history of diversity, different parts of the country have different holiday traditions. Newfoundland is no different. Newfoundlanders have a knack for being dramatic, loud, and hospitable — we love music, food, and a good ol’ Sunday dinner.

In my family, tales of mummers and a bowl full of mashed carrots, cabbage, and turnip are among the staples of every Christmas dinner.

BECAUSE OF CANADA’S

1. FOOD, FOO D, GLOR IOUS FO O D

Newfies love to fire up a scoff.

Every Sunday after church, without fail, Newfoundlanders will gather in their homes for some turkey, potatoes, turnip, cabbage, carrots, beets, dressing (bread crumbs mixed with savoury spice), pudding (bread), and of course, salted beef and gravy. This happens multiple times over the Christmas holidays — when family is over, on Sundays, and on Christmas Day. These Newfoundland

dinner recipes and little tips and tricks are passed down from generation to generation. My grandma passed them down to my mother, and my mom will pass them down to me.

2 . “M U M M E R I N G ” : A T E R R IFY ING T RA D I T I O N

Though it has been around since the 1800s, the act of “mummering” has, thankfully, died out in recent years. It’s terrifying. The origin of it is nice: friends and family dressing up and going from home to home in small communities, singing while the hosts try to figure out who’s who. Sounds nice enough, right? What was terrifying were the costumes that mummers used to wear — they would dress up in anything they could find. This included masks (usually pillow cases with holes cut out for eyes and mouths painted on) and other ridiculous attire that when put together could be utterly horrifying.

3 . A GO O D O L’ J I G

Newfies are notorious for their eastern folk music and jigs, namely “I’s the B’y” or Buddy Wasisname’s “Saltwater Joys.” What you may not know is that almost every Newfoundlander is willing to break into song at any moment, especially during Christmas (we’re

A Newfoundland mummer and Nan sit on the branches of our Christmas tree. | PHOTO BY LESLIE THOMPSON

really fond of old hymns). Aside from my island-born parents — two of the most musically gifted people I know — I have dozens of aunts, uncles, and other relatives from The Rock who can play a myriad of instruments. The accordion is the instrument of choice. If they don’t play an instrument, they’re always willing to lend a voice — even if they can’t hold a tune. In other words, they’re always ready to give ’er a go.

4. VISITS UPON VISITS

People from The Rock love

to talk, and it’s no secret. A 10-minute visit can easily turn into hours. This is because of the historical way of life on the island, working during the day with the land and the sea, and then having time in the evenings to spend sitting around telling stories. Even today, Newfoundlanders love to visit, and visit they do. The Christmas holidays are a perfect excuse to drop over, bumbuy.

5. W E’ RE A LL FA M ILY HERE, LOVE

I can’t count the number of

times my family has welcomed strangers and new friends into our home for holiday dinners. They can’t take no for an answer, even if you wanted them to. If someone heard you say, “I’m alright, I’ll spend Christmas Eve with my cat!”

They would undoubtedly respond with, “Mind now! There’ll be none o’ dat!” The bottom line is: we’re all family here, love.

Note: It has been debated whether or not the term “Newfie” is offensive. As a Newfoundlander, the word holds a sense of endearment and pride, and is held in the highest regard.

O N YO U R PL ATE

A healthy chia-based breakfast to start your day Because it’s all downhill after that during the holidays M I R A L I A L M AU L A

WITH THE HOLIDAYS coming up, the time to indulge in sugary treats and a feast (or three) is upon us.

While it’s not the best time to start eating healthy (that’s what New Year’s resolutions are for), it might just be the best time to start your day off right — because you know the afternoon and the evening will be tricky.

I recently bought a cereal that had a chia seed base rather than oats, which tends to give me a tummy ache and takes more effort to make. While I like the cereal I bought, it was quite expensive, and

I didn’t love the flavours in it. So I decided to take a trip to Bulk Barn and make my own blend based on ingredients that I know are good for me and I like the taste of.

The great thing about this recipe is that you can really adjust it to your own taste and switch it up every day (partly so you don’t get sick of eating the same thing and partly because it seems like the things that are supposed to be good for you change all the time, so it’s best to eat a little bit of several healthy things — just in case!)

or dark chocolate chips • ¼ teaspoon of ground cinnamon, or to taste • Pinch of salt (optional) Recipe 1. Place

all ingredients in a bowl and let sit for five minutes.

2. Stir.

3. Enjoy!

Health benefits of chia:

Ingredients

• 1 tablespoon of chia seeds • ½ tablespoon of ground flax seeds • 2 tablespoons of milk or a milk alternative • 1½ tablespoons of walnuts, almonds, pistachios, pumpkin seeds, and/or sunflower seeds • 1 tablespoon of raisins, craisins,

• Omega-3 fatty acids (helps raise “good” cholesterol) • Antioxidants • High in fibre • High in iron • High in calcium • Good amount of protein

Using chia as a base for cereal is an easy way to incorporate these healthy little seeds into your diet. | PHOTO BY MIRALI ALMAULA

I S SU E 18 3.14 | LI FE & I N N OVATI O N

TH E O NTA R I O N .CO M

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Gryphons tell us about their holiday traditions C AT C O O P E R

“We all decorate the tree together and put up our ‘sibling ornaments.’

We put them all together on the tree and spend Christmas together.

My mom writes poems and gives us all little ones on each of the twelve days of Christmas.”

“My heritage is Danish, so one tradition that we do is we have a big smorgasbord every New Year’s day. This tradition has been going on since before I was born, and we get my whole family around the table. A smorgasbord consists of open face sandwiches, so my father creates 50 to 60 sandwiches and we have this special liquor called “akvavit” that we have at the meal. The meal lasts for about two to three hours and we just sit around as a family and chat and talk about the year that we had and what we look forward to for the next year. It’s a really good time for us to come together as a family, talk, and reconnect.”

“We eat [during New Year’s] and have a couple conversations about how things have been, because I’m usually away, just to catch up. After we eat, we watch TV together. I was told that because noodles are long, that it’s a symbol for hoping for longevity.”

“On Christmas Day we have our own personal Christmas at our house. Traditionally, cinnabons every morning, for sure, that’s a big one. After our personal Christmas, we go over to my grandma’s house where we meet up with family from other cities, and we spend the day there and have a full course meal. She’s Italian, so full course meal. We catch up, especially with me at school it’s hard to know what’s going on in everybody’s lives.”

“It started very randomly… the Polar Express was on and that was my parents’ favourite movie. It was on a TV channel, and then after that came on a Canada’s Worst Driver marathon, and we were all just laughing so hard at this Canada’s Worst Driver marathon — this was probably when I was seven or eight or so — we joked about it for so long afterwards and then the next Christmas Eve there was another Canada’s Worst Driver marathon on. Then we found out that every Christmas Eve there’s a Canada’s Worst Driver marathon, and so just about every year since then, without fail, we’ve watched a full season of Canada’s Worst Driver every Christmas Eve.”

“On Christmas Eve, my dad always used to bring my family and I the largest box of assorted chocolates you could ever see.

We would all just bite [a chocolate] all at once and put it back.

We wouldn’t eat them whole, we would just bite them, and put them back, just to see what the inside tasted like. Then, of course, we would make cookies for Santa and stuff like that, but that was my favourite part.” (left) “My dad would bake cookies and my younger brother and I would just wait for them to be cooked, and then we’d have them right away.” (right)

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TH E O NTA R I O N

O N DATI N G

Don’t make life harder for your single friends over the holidays How to interact with others without putting them down M I R A L I A L M AU L A

BEING SINGLE over the holidays is difficult enough. It can be lonely when most people you know have a significant other and are busy doing things couples do at this time of year. Single people can do without questions about their singleness or “sympathetic” comments that make the holiday season altogether less than merry.

Here are some things you can do to not be the worst over the holidays.

When you see someone at a social gathering:

Do NOT ask them if they’re seeing someone. That’s a piece of information that someone can offer themselves, if they’re willing to share.

2. If you forget, and accidentally ask them about their relationship status, then do NOT look 1.

at them as if you feel sorry for them when they respond.

3. Refrain from saying things like this when you find out someone is single: • “Aw.” • “It’s hard out there.”

• “That’s so weird because there are so many dating apps, have you tried Tinder? You should try Tinder. I know a girl who met her husband on Tinder.”

• “It’ll happen when you least expect it.”

• “It’ll happen when you stop looking.”

• “You have to put yourself out there.”

• “Good for you, you don’t need a man (or woman).”

• “Oh, are you single by choice?”

• “You kids are all so independent these days. Career, career, career.”

Being single during the holidays can be hard, don't make it harder for people by being inconsiderate.

PHOTO COURTESY OF ALL WOMEN'S TALK

• “Maybe your expectations are too high.”

• “At a certain point, you really just have to settle.”

• “Do you not want to have kids someday? You must not want to have kids.”

• “Plenty of fish in the sea.”

• “Aww, I never got to try online dating, it seems so exciting! I met my husband when I was 17 — boring!”

• “That’s so surprising. You’re attractive and accomplished. I just know you’ll meet someone

great.”

4. Do not offer to set them up with someone who they have nothing in common with beyond the fact that they are both single.

5. If you do know someone you can set them up with, make sure both people are actually open to being set up on a date.

If you’re thinking, well that’s a lot of stuff I can’t say, what can I say then?

Well, I’m glad you asked! It’s actually pretty easy. You can

simply say:

• “Do you want some [fill in the name of a beverage — for example, eggnog]?”

• “How’re things? (Listen.) That’s great.”

• “Want to play [insert the name of a game — for example, Cranium]?”

Now, you too, can not be the worst person single people have to deal with this December.

H appy holidays!

’Tis the season to be kissing underneath the mistletoe la la Romantic decoration or deadly plant in disguise?

C A R O LY N N W H I T E H O U S E

when you first hear the word mistletoe?

If you’re like me, I picture people laughing and giggling at a holiday party as they point to the funny-looking green plant with bright red berries hanging from the doorway.

If you also picture a small plant with spiky, dark green leaves and red berries like me, we’re actually both wrong. This kind of plant is called holly and is commonly confused with mistletoe.

WHAT COMES TO MIND

Instead, mistletoe has round, green leaves with mostly white berries.

So now you have a neat fact to share at your next family gathering!

Let’s get back to our joyful holiday scene. What I don’t imagine here is people getting deathly ill from one of those ripe mistletoe berries accidently falling into their eggnog and getting swallowed by

mistake. That’s right — mistletoe is a poisonous plant! Don’t be fooled by its charming good looks and sweet nature — this is one dangerous shrub we’re dealing with.

This fact now begs the question: why on Earth do we have this tradition of kissing under a poisonous plant? It doesn’t seem very romantic to me. I mean, I know people love a good thrill, and I can understand that — but this is poison we’re talking about.

Now, I have to admit, I did a little research on my own and came across some nice folklore stories about how the tradition began and the meaning and symbolism behind it. One story tells of how mistletoe was believed to promote life and fertility because of its protection against poison (ironically), as well as it being a general aphrodisiac. I thought these anecdotes were quite lovely and well-intentioned, and I guess what I’m trying to say is I really

Don’t be fooled by its charming good looks and sweet nature — this is one dangerous shrub we’re dealing with.

Many people commonly mistake holly (left) for mistletoe (right).

PHOTOS EDITED BY ALORA GRIFFITHS

don’t have anything against mistletoe. Everyone needs to be loved, right? Even poisonous plants. I just thought it would be funny to highlight this one little fact that often seems to be overlooked when people talk about the tradition.

Notably, according to an article by the New York Times, the idea that mistletoe is a deadly plant is actually a slight myth. The plant does in fact contain harmful chemicals that can cause an upset stomach and slowed heartbeat, but these

symptoms have only been found to present themselves in a handful of people who ingested the berries.

So in reality, it’s not deadly, but still not the greatest. Just don’t plan on garnishing your turkey dinner with it anytime soon.

Anyway, isn’t it great being informed about these things?

H a p py h o l i d ays a n d h a p py kissing!

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FEATURE

CREATING A BUZZ U of G could “bee” the next Bee Campus Studies at the Honey Bee Research Centre aim to improve honey bee health as well as educate the public.

PHOTOS BY KAREN K. TRAN

A S H L I E B R OW N L E E

The University of Guelph is a powerhouse of bee support. Not only do we have numerous experts, but we also have an Animal Health Laboratory that tests for a range of honey bee pathogens, and the Honey Bee Research Centre. The research centre describes itself as “focused on honey bee health,” particularly bee genetics, behaviour, and parasites. They also teach one of the few beekeeping courses that’s recommended by the Ontario Beekeepers’ Association.

As a university with a long history of agriculture, and a large focus on the environment, it’s not surprising that we also have a plethora of natural spaces, like our woodlots and the sprawling arboretum, to match our beautiful green campus.

Bees are critical to our food supply and the health of our environment, pollinating up to an estimated 30 per cent of the food we eat ($900 million in crops per year in Ontario and up to 90 per cent of wild plants and flowers).

Bee populations are in decline due to several factors, including:

• ● Poisoning • ● Decreased immunity • ● Disease • ● Pests and parasites • ● Habitat loss • ● Loss of food causing malnutrition and starvation But the largest threat to bee populations is pesticide use.

With yearly losses, even among honey bees, at four times the sustainable level, people everywhere are becoming concerned for the future of bees and the plants they pollinate.

Ontario’s regulations prohibit the use of most pesticides by citizens, but allow those pesticides to be applied by anyone who acquires a licence to do so.

U of G goes beyond adhering to Ontario’s pesticide ban by not using problem pesticides even under the allowed licenced methods. Most of our lawns go untreated by herbicides, while high visibility areas, like the Gryphon Statue and the sports field, get treated with only Fiesta Lawn Weed Killer and vinegar — two green options listed under the Government of Ontario’s Section 11 restrictions. Both of these options are not believed to pose any threat at all to bees. Insecticides are very rarely used (only on select highvalue plants) and insecticidal soap is the green alternative chosen for these scenarios.

Although there have been increases in cost for these newer, greener methods, and there are a few battles that

T he l a r g est threat to bee populations is pesticide use ... people ... are becoming concerned for the future of

bees...

the U of G grounds maintenance are struggling with — care of pines and white birch trees among them — the University’s grounds manager, John Reinhart, says that the effects have been quite good. He credits this partly to a phenomenon he says he was not expecting when the University made the 2008 switch. He states that “people started accepting ‘not perfect’” in their landscaping. This move towards more natural-looking green spaces is allowing the University to be more environmentally-friendly as well as more bee-friendly.

My mission is to take one step further in bee protection: by applying to register U of G as Bee City Canada’s second Bee Campus. Bee City Canada is a program that intends to foster bee-friendly policies by giving recognition to cities and campuses that show a commitment to helping bees. This pledge to help bees on campus, and the sense of accountability this could bring with it, may encourage us to continue moving in the right direction for bee health. I can think of no better way to take pride in our green spaces and environmentally- and bee-friendly practices than to be recognized for all the steps we take.

The Importance of Bees Bees are critical to our food supply and the health of our environment.

SUPER POLLINATORS

It is estimated that bees are responsible for pollinating 30 per cent of the food we eat.

GOOD FOR FOOD

Pollination by bees contributes to $900 million in crops per year in Ontario.

NATURAL BEAUTY

Bees pollinate up to 90 per cent of wild plants and flowers.

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OPINION

20

THE ONTARION

2 2 | I N T ER NE T OF THI NG S

23 | HOL IDAY GRIEF

@ t h e ont ar i o n

ON SEX

Six ways to make your holidays naughty and nice Because kissing under the mistletoe is so last decade N ATA L I E T H I E N

IT’S THE MOST wonderful time of the year! Exams are done. Three weeks to catch up on sleep and relax (unless your part-time job calls). Time to spend with family and getting stuffed with homemade roasts. It’s also the time to make up on all the lost fun you cut out during studying. Here are some tips to heat up this cold Christmas.

1 . DECORATE TH E CHR IST M AS TR E E NAKE D

Invite your partner over to decorate the tree while wearing nothing but Santa’s hat and stockings. Experience the magic of watching the tree come to life while enjoying the sexy view.

2 . NE T FL IX AND C H I LL W I T H C HR IST M AS -T H E M E D M OV I ES

5 . W E A R C H R I ST M AS -T H E M E D LI N G E R I E

Watch Home Alone, Love Actually, or How the Grinch Stole Christmas, because why not? Old movies bring back some nostalgic feelings for the past, which can lead to some present feelings during the short intervals. Not to mention, you are already snuggled up in bed so it takes minimal effort to take things to the next level.

Places like La Senza and the Stag Shop will no doubt be holding a lingerie sale with items in Christmas colours of red, green, and gold. Even better, places like the Stag Shop sell holiday-themed costumes. Who doesn’t want to be spanked by a Sexy Santa?

3 . HE AT T HI N G S U P BY T HE FIR E P LAC E

Sex on a sheepskin rug. Every other light in the house off. Just the firelight bathing you and your partner’s body. Pupils dilated. A glass of mulled wine on the side.

How is that not seductive?

4. S E XY P R ES E N T S

Sex toys, massage oils, and erotic novels, oh my! You can find sexy presents at the Stag Shop in Guelph or other sex shops. A far better present than coal for being naughty.

6 . TA K E A LO N G BAT H W I T H C H R I ST M AS - S C E N T E D BAT H B O M B S

Places like Lush have tons of creative, fun bath products.

Include scented candles from somewhere like Bath and Body Works — there is something undeniably sexy about the smell of Winter Candy Apple.

Remember to always wrap it before you tap it, and I don’t just mean presents!

Get in the holiday spirit and then get out of your clothes. | PHOTO COURTESY OF INSTYLE

Sex toys, massage oils, and erotic novels, oh my!

D IARY O F A V E T S TU D E NT

Just horsin’ around at OVC Who says school can’t be fun?

C A R L E I G H C AT H C A R T

IF YOU’RE READING THIS ,

it means that I have survived my turn at Horse Care Week. Though I’m quite confident I’ve been walking around campus in a mildly comatose state as a result of five days’ sleep deprivation, I must admit that the experience was fun and rewarding.

What is Horse Care Week, you ask? Well, in yet another testament to the strong diversity of the veterinary profession, there remains a stark disparity in the experiences of myself and my classmates. It is interesting to think that some of us have spent our lives caring for members of the equine family while others are just now touching a horse for the first time.

Horse Care Week is a Phase 1 curricular requirement at the Ontario Veterinary College (OVC)

that aims to bridge this gap between its students — or at the very least, to see it reduced. At some point during the fall semester, students are assigned a week during which they are expected to practice simple horse care tasks prior before their classes. From 7:30 a.m. to 8:30 a.m. each morning this past week, you could find me amongst a small portion of classmates walking, grooming, and simply familiarizing ourselves with a group of gentle (and patient!) mares on campus.

As a farm girl and recreational horseback rider, none of this experience was new to me. Yet for many of my classmates, Horse Care Week is an excellent opportunity to gain confidence working with these beautiful, mighty creatures. It was rewarding to see

Horse Care Week is an excellent opportunity to gain confidence. colleagues, who on Monday were timid about leading the horses around, confidently picking out the horses’ hooves by Friday. It’s safe to say that some adorable friendships were formed.

T hou g h e ac h p er s on d i ffers in their comfort level with horses, there is no denying that they are large and potentially dangerous animals if not properly handled. Even the most

Vet students like Carleigh Cathcart know that horsin' around is actually serious business. | PHOTO PROVIDED BY CARLEIGH CATHCART

experienced horseperson risks injury if they fail to exercise due diligence in their practice. I say this not to frighten any person considering involvement with these majestic animals, but in profound appreciation for their power and

potential. Horse Care Week allows future veterinarians, regardless of stream, to gain exposure to an often enigmatic, yet fascinating, animal.

And hay, isn’t that what vet school’s all about?

I S SU E 18 3.14 | O PI N I O N

TH E O NTA R I O N .CO M

You may forget the presents you got, but you will remember the people you were with. | PHOTO PROVIDED BY BRUCE MATHEWS

O N TH E N AN D N OW

Christmas memories from the woods Bad weather ahead? Check the web, social and radio for closures

The best things in life aren’t things B R U C E M AT H E WS

IT’S THAT “Most Wonderful Time of the Year” — the fifth season that many call Christmas. The music starts right after the first leaves fall and the pressure builds to shop, shop, SHOP! I’m not a total Grinch — I like a lot of the holiday music, and exchanging gifts can be great fun — but sometimes I’m just slow to feel the spirit.

One thing that always helped get me in the right mindset was the Carlisle DIY Christmas Eve Party.

I’m now retired and moved back to Guelph one year ago, after living in Toronto for 30 years or so. Living next to the University has meant getting to know the local campus and the city of Guelph properly. So far U of G has turned out to be a pretty good neighbour. I can buy honey and do a radio show on CFRU (Zombie Jamboree at 6:30 p.m. on Sundays), all in the UC. I mostly lived in Guelph for university, working several part time jobs including DJing at the Bullring when it was a dance bar. Eventually I settled in “The Six,” had a family of my own and three decades flew by.

Before any of that, I lived with my family in the woods outside the village of Carlisle, about halfway to Hamilton, east of Highway 6. Looking back now, it’s like my parents were in the “back-to-the-land” vanguard of the 1970s, although I’m sure they never looked at it that way. They had 60 acres of forest down in a valley with no visible neighbours, a pond, a large garden, and a rotating menagerie of animals, including goats, rabbits, chickens, and animals that

already lived there, such as raccoons, foxes, and deer.

Dad had a real job in town, so they weren’t exactly hippies. One of the best parts about living in the woods were the annual do-ityourself Christmas Eve parties. Looking back on it now, the Christmas Eve parties in the woods seemed almost like some weird caricature of an “Ontario Country Christmas,” dreamed up by a scriptwriter. (Not corny enough to be “Kountry Kristmas,” but almost).

The wood stove would be burning and heating some mulled cider, decorations were low-key; a simple tree from the woods, wreaths, candles glowing in little paper bags of sand along the lane. If there was much snow, getting stuck was often part of the fun.

The evening was potluck, including the entertainment activities, which were fun for all ages. Considerable creativity was shown over the years. Besides skits and musical numbers, there were goldfish and earthworm races, dress-up trunks and Polaroid cameras for corny period pics, predictions to be opened next year, and contests of all sorts. There were also garish ‘gifts’ that nobody wanted and were subject to vicious re-gifting. Often silly, always fun.

After more than 40 years, people remember those DI Y Christmas Eves with fondness. It reminds me that the whole holiday celebration is about people, and that people, in the right frame of mind, are all you need to have a great time.



When a winter storm hits, find out whether the University is open by checking uoguelph.ca | Local Radio | SafeGryphon app

 @uofg |  /uofguelph If the University decides before normal working hours to close because of bad weather or an emergency, every effort will be made to communicate that decision by 6 a.m. The campus switchboard will also have a recorded message.

U of G’s Hazardous Weather/Emergency Closing Procedures policy is available on the University website.

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TH E O NTA R I O N

The Internet of Things: Changing the nature of human connection The benefits and dangers of everything being “smart” TIA JULIEN

A revolution without limits Imagine a world where your sound system cues music according to your mood, and your thermostat adjusts to the timing of your lunch break.

Picture a landscape of things that tailor to your every need, juggling the intricacies of your social life so you don’t have to.

Since the ’90s, the rapid rise of the internet has brought both risk and reward. The internet continues to expand horizons for public information, media sharing, security, and energy efficiency.

The technological age has already changed the way people perform daily tasks.

Our smart phones allow us to carry the internet with us wherever we go, and bloggers, academics, and professionals have been gripped by the fact that people will soon find themselves facing the unfathomable vastness of the web in the monitors of their coffee-makers.

Unlike past revolutions, the internet transformation possesses an innate quality unlike any we’ve seen before — the absence of perceivable limitation.

The positives of flow The Internet of Things (IoT)

refers to the wiring of all possible devices, aligning our information systems with one another, connecting people to people, people to things, and things to other things. As Rozita Dara, a professor in the school of computer science at U of G puts it, “we already have sensors embedded in our smartphones, Fitbits, smartwatches, smart grids, and cars, to name a few — [multinational technolog y conglomerate] CISCO predicts that, by 2030, there will be 500 billion connected devices.”

The purpose is to increase efficiency and save energy by linking all devices to a common network. People won’t have to transfer data — their devices will already be doing so.

This proposal is accompanied by a rich collection of potential benefits, including the minimization of safety risks in hospitals and schools.

Dara lists democratization of information, liberalization of technology, and faster communication among the benefits of IoT technologies. The IoT has the potential to support equitable education in even the most remote locations of the world and to revolutionize healthcare and security systems, eliminating response time and error. Professor Dara notes, “low-cost wireless technology in Africa has made a

significant contribution in how they manage banking and healthcare.”

Benson Hougland, vice president of hardware and software manufacturer Opto 22, spoke to the IoT’s lifesaving potential at a 2014 TED conference. In a medical emergency, he says, your Fitbit can assess your body for cardiac arrest, and call an ambulance while transferring your medical information to the nearest hospital, cutting out crucial moments of response time that could mean saving a life.

Animating the inanimate The technology includes sensitizing objects modelled after human senses: hearing, sight, touch. Futurists, scholars who study the possibilities of the future, are asking “What does this mean for humanity?” Critical thought on the potential social effects have produced a theory that the IoT is a sort of “computerized cognition.”

In his media studies cult classic TechGnosis: Myth, Magic, and Mysticism in the Age of Information, scholar Erik Davis writes, “[when] everything becomes linked with everything else, […] matter becomes mind.”

Things will soon “think” like people, predicting and reacting with the continuous flow of internal and external stimuli.

Objects that predict users’ needs will significantly reduce the daily task list of the average person, essentially cutting out the middle-man — the middle-man being humankind.

Devices throughout your home will sense your presence and adjust settings according to your perceived preferences, adjusting the temperature, pulling the blinds, suggesting your favourite snack, and dispensing alerts. What will come of our agency, our autonomy, when the tics of our personalities are manifested by machines?

With the IoT, we will transition from projecting ourselves onto the external world to transferring parts of ourselves into the fabric of our environment, animating the inanimate. An age that blurs the distinction between our minds and the world is an age of unfathomable potential.

Humanity displaced It can also be a frightening

thing, especially when considering the IoT’s potential to displace human practices. Are we looking at a dark future like the one in Pixar’s 2008 f ilm WALL-E ? W hen our refrigerators track the moment our milk begins to spoil, sending alerts to our wrists and pockets, will the ability to pay attention remain in our repertoire?

IoT will reduce and potentially eliminate the necessity for certain thought processes.

Being made increasingly aware by our devices, humans will become increasingly inactive in our own lives. Our world will be one of reflective surfaces, a tunnel of mirrors. To put it radically, our awareness will be programmed and our autonomy obsolete, while machines perform so much of our lives for us.

We are tapping into a new realm of connectivity that may contribute to an inhuman evolution. For better or worse, increased machine-to-machine communication will continue to shape how humans interact with technology, with one another, and with themselves.

The technology already exists, minutely in our Fitbits, and monumentally in our global communications.

The Internet of Things redefines what it means to be human.

EDITORIAL Follow us @theontarion

The holidays can hurt Dealing with grief over the holidays LESLIE THOMPSON

ON MAY 9, 2010, after

a long battle with an illness that wasn’t meant to be fatal, my older brother passed away at McMaster Hospital at the age of 18. I find it hard to remember any of the Christmas holidays in the years that followed.

For example, the hardest thing for me is watching my parents.

What I’ve found as the years have passed is that the holidays seem to get easier for me and my younger brother, but harder for them.

Memories seem to be triggered more at this time of year than almost any other.

We have many commemorative

University Centre Room 264 University of Guelph N1G 2W1 ontarion@uoguelph.ca Phone 519-824-4120 General: x 58265 Editorial: x 58250 Advertising: x 58267 Accounts: x 53534 E DITORIAL STAFF Editor-in-Chief Mirali Almaula News Editor Tiann Nantais Arts & Culture Editor Will Wellington Sports & Health Editor Matteo Cimellaro Digital Content Editor Karen K. Tran Marketing Assistant Leslie Thompson Copy Editor Carolynn Whitehouse

BUS INESS STAFF Office Manager Aaron Jacklin Business Coordinator Lorrie Taylor Ad Manager Al Ladha Circulation Director Salvador Moran Readership Researcher Patrick Sutherland

1. Denial 2. Anger 3. Bargaining 4. Depression 5. Acceptance

What I’m trying to say is that just because it gets easier to handle your grief, doesn’t mean it can’t get harder again, and in different ways.

23

PRODUC TION STAFF Photo & Graphics Editor Alora Griffiths Director of Layout & Design Frances Esenwa

Therapists, doctors, and selfproclaimed grief gurus talk about the five stages of grief almost religiously:

“It will come,” they say. “You will get to that final step. It will get easier.” They’re not wrong — it does.

What people fail to talk about, however, is how hard it is to deal with family gatherings, celebrations, and other social events during the holidays after someone you love is gone. I’m not just talking about the immediate years following the event — I mean that this time of year can be hard to deal with, again and again, every single year, for the rest of someone’s life.

A s p s ychiat r is t Elisab et h Kübler-R oss said, “ The five stages—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—are a part of the framework that makes up our learning to live with the one we lost. They are tools to help us frame and identify what we may be feeling. But they are not stops on some linear timeline in grief.”

The Ontarion Inc.

Memorial ornaments as gifts are beautiful, but sometimes painful. | PHOTO BY LESLIE THOMPSON

Grief is itself a medicine.

WILLIAM COWPER ENGLISH POET

ornaments and decorations in our house — I get a new ornament for our family tree every year, and we have multiple ornaments from family members. These are beautiful gestures, and they are appreciated, but it’s important for even our closest relatives to understand that no one will ever feel the pain that my parents do.

Ornaments and sympathy cards won’t fix the hole in their lives that others only have to remember once or twice a year.

I think it’s this reminder — that some people only have to remember sometimes, while the people directly affected have no choice but to remember daily — that brings up the biggest issue. Let me clearly note that these gifts and kind words are welcome. However, one must be aware that even

these simple gestures of memory and thoughtfulness can send a grieving parent, sibling, or friend on a trip down a painful memory lane, even after several years have passed. What’s most important to recognize is that we have to let it happen.

This year, my family has the added grief of losing our beloved family dog a couple of months before the holidays. He was a big part of our family, and putting him down was one of the hardest things we’ve had to do in years. He was with us for family vacations, family walks, and on Christmas mornings as we opened presents. He knew my brother, and was there when he left us. This serves as just one way that painful memories can manifest during the season.

It is almost universally

acknowledged that everyone deals with grief differently. This holiday season, be aware that someone who has lost a loved one may be finding these days full of bright lights and cheerful music to be overwhelming or depressing.

It’s been ingrained in our minds from a young age that the holidays are meant for spending time with loved ones. When a loved one is gone, however, the holidays serve as a reminder that the person is not around to spend time with anymore.

It is important that we let our friends and family be sad so that they can cope. Sadness isn’t a bad thing — it’s proof that the person was loved.

Don’t get upset with them for not being happy because “it’s Christmas.” Trust me when I say that letting them deal with the pain is helpful in the long run.

As English poet William Cowper said, “Grief is itself a medicine.”

BOARD OF DIREC TORS President Alex Lefebvre Chair of the Board Jordan Terpstra Vice President Communications Heather Gilmore Vice President Finance Mehkansh Sharma DIREC TORS Emma Callon Miriam Habib Jonathan Marun-Batista Josh Millen Megan Scarth CONTRIBUTORS Caelan Beard Ashlie Brownlee Carleigh Cathcart Peaches Chamberlain Michael Cimesa Cat Cooper Amir Eblan Colleen Fava Corben Grant Tia Julien Bruce Mathews Brady Patterson Sarah Seukeran Hamaad Shehzad Janan Shoja Doost Katie Stokes Megan Sullivan Natalie Thien

The Ontarion is a non-profit organization governed by a Board of Directors. Since The Ontarion undertakes the publishing of student work, the opinions expressed in this publication do not necessarily reflect those of The Ontarion staff and Board of Directors. The Ontarion reserves the right to edit or refuse all material deemed sexist, racist, homophobic, or otherwise unfit for publication as determined by the Editor-in-Chief. Material of any form appearing in this newspaper is copyrighted 2017 and cannot be reprinted without the approval of the Editor-in-Chief. The Ontarion retains the right of first publication on all material. In the event that an advertiser is not satisfied with an advertisement in the newspaper, they must notify The Ontarion within four working days of publication. The Ontarion will not be held responsible for advertising mistakes beyond the cost of advertisement. The Ontarion is printed by Hamilton Web.

F U N PAG E

24

THE ONTARION

GET ON TOP OF the holidays DECE MB E R

JAN UARY

Starting a Business?

12/07-01/11

TO DO LIST

Dec. 13 Guelph Creatives Networking Night 7 p.m. The Dragon South

Dec. 15 Dec. 7-10 Christmas Village Market Creators, vendors, food, and entertainment Various times, Old Quebec Street Shoppes

Dec. 8 M-B Comedy #101 Guelph Actually: An Improvised Love Story 9 p.m. The Making-Box Kade L. Twist Book Launch & Performance 7 p.m. Silence

Dec. 9

Lessons from Leaders: What I Learned Bankrolling a Business Local business leaders talk entrepreneurship and growing a business 7:30 a.m. Innovation Guelph Stay Out of the Mall XVI Concert in support of Canadian Cancer Society 8 p.m. Red Papaya

Dec. 16 Teen Movie Trivia Night Fundraiser for Guelph Girls Rock Camp 8 p.m. The Common Cafe

Guelph Holiday Vintage & Makers’ Market Unique holiday gifts 11 a.m. St. George’s Anglican Church

Dec. 16-31

Missed Connection Records 4th year anniversary party 9 p.m. ANAF

Dec. 17

Dec. 10 Guelph Christmas Craft Show and Market 11 a.m. Royal Canadian Legion Br. 234

Dec. 11 CFRU 2017 Annual General Meeting 5:30 p.m. UC 441

Sparkles in the Park Celebration of lights 5:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. Riverside Park Sons of Serendip Quartet; holiday songs 2 p.m. River Run Centre

Dec. 19 Silence Presents: A Yuletide Concert Ft. The O’Pears & The Lifers 7 p.m. Silence

Dogwalker? Contractor? Landscaper?

Need Room for Gear?

Hiker? Skier? Boarder? Diver? Paddler?

Dec. 20 Merry Maker Night Market Food trucks, festivities, and more 4 p.m. to 9 p.m. Guelph Farmers’ Market

Honda Odyssey 2003 for Sale 203,500km

Dec. 23 Guelph Chamber Choir Handel’s Messiah 7:30 p.m. River Run Centre

Snow, Ice, Hill Control Smooth 5-speed & 3 low-gears (1,2,D3,D,R) Traction Control System (TCS) Michelin X-Ice 225/60 R16 snowies on rims

Dec. 31 M-B Comedy #104: F**K YOU 2017 Stand-up comedy and improv 9 p.m. The Making-Box

Room for Cargo & Gear 3 rows of seats for 7 Room for 4x8 plywood sheets

Safety Certified & Accident-Free Consistently maintained; all receipts $4100, tax included

Donnie Darko - ’80s New Year’s Party Eve @ DSTRCT 10 p.m. 10 Wyndham St N

ForSaleHondaOdyssey@gmail.com 437-772-1058

New Years’ Eve Fireworks Show Time TBD, Riverside Park

Jan. 1 HAPPY NEW YEAR!

W E H AV E A W I N N E R

Jan. 6 B - The Underwater Bubble Show Mime, dance, puppetry, juggling, contortion, and more 7 p.m. River Run Centre

Jan. 8 Classes resume

Jan. 11 New issue of The Ontarion on stands

CHECK OUT OUR SWEET NOVEMBER RAFFLE WINNER ON PAGE 05

F U N PAG E

25

THE ONTARION

CROSSWORD 1

For your chance to win TWO FREE BOB’S DOGS, submit a completed crossword to The Ontarion office, UC 264, by JANUARY 9, 2018 at 3 P.M.

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26

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Fill in the empty squares so that each of the digits 1 through 9 appear once in each row, column, and 3-by-3 block.

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SUDOKU

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44

56

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ANSWERS FROM 183.13

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24

Crossword Winner from 183.13 JAMES BULLARD

7

14

20

Winners are announced in the paper each week and should collect their voucher from The Ontarion office.

6

5 7 5

8

2

6

3

4

8

2

6

3

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6

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Across 1–Pie nut

Down

6–Lady of the house

1–She played Mindy

11–Concorde, e.g.

2–Author Le Shan

14–A Bell for

3–Jalopy

15–Form of lyrical poem

4–Besides

16–Chinese "way"

5–Sounds

17–

6–Confronts

Gras

18–Antique auto

7–Basilica area

19–Compass dir. 2

8–Crash wherever convenient

0–Fills to the gills 2

9–Citrus cooler

2–Do

10–Republic in S North America

a Wallz?

24–Pride woman

11–Pittsburgh product

28–Pertaining to the eyes

12–Capital city of Yemen

29–Nearly

13–

30–Ohio city

21–"The Thin Man" pooch

32–Hammer part

23–Woman who hunts

33–Late bloomer?

24–

35–Mrs. Dick Tracy

25–Actress Graff

39–Roadside rests

26–Signs

40–Once around the track

27–Malarkey

41–Chicago mayor Emanuel

28–Bruins legend

42–Zaire's Mobutu Seko

30–Maker of Pong

43–Social gathering

31–Retained

45–Switch ending

34–Shut with force

46–Wynonna's mom

36–Keep an

48–Bivalve mollusk

37–Blacksmith, at times

50–Cramps, e.g.

38–Campfire treat

53–Billboards, some say

43–Not neg.

54–Milo of Tarbarella%

44–Spoollike toy

55–Columbus's birthplace

47–Fine fiddles

57–Persian Gulf fed.

49–Pines

58–Jewelled crown worn by

50–March man

women 60–Souvenir

51–Sacred song

65–Hearst kidnap grp.

52–Lots

66–

53–Related on the mother’s side

my case

is human...

lazuli

the ground

67–Nary a soul

55–Greek goddess of the earth

68–Sound booster

56–Prefix for while

69–Take to the ice

59–Annoy

70–Have a feeling about

61–Fair-hiring abbr.

62–Actor Chaney 63–

and outs

64–So-so grade

CL ASSIFIEDS

CO M M U N I T Y L I S TI N G S

Inexpensively reach the U of G community with a Classified Ad. The deadline for the next issue of The Ontarion is 1 p.m. on Monday, Jan. 8, 2018. Classified Ads have a limit of 90 words and start at $6/30 words. Email ontarion@uoguelph.ca to book yours.

Getting your campus or communiy group's nonprofit event listed for free in our weekly Community Listings section is as easy as emailing ontarion@uoguelph.ca. The deadline for the next issue of The Ontarion is 1 p.m. on Monday, Jan. 8, 2018.

COMICS

26

THE ONTARION

SEE YOUR NAME ontarion@uoguelph.ca WWW.THEONTARION.CA/volunteer

IN PRINT

VOLUNTEER

MEETINGS WEDNESDAYS

5:30 UC264

SERVICE SERVICE ADVISORY CHANGES

ON THE MOVE

WE’RE MAKING SOME MINOR ADJUSTMENTS, STARTING JANUARY 7 ROUTE 41 DOWNTOWNUNIVERSITY EXPRESS

ROUTE 52 U KORTRIGHT

The 6:50 a.m. departure will no longer be offered Monday to Friday.

Will operate Monday to Friday every 10 minutes from 7:35 to 10:55 a.m. and every 20 minutes from 2:15 to 4:55 p.m.

ROUTE 51 U JANEFIELD

ROUTES 57 U IRONWOOD AND 58 U EDINBURGH

Will no longer stop at Stone Road Mall, but will provide more coverage along Wilsonview Avenue (routes 50 U Stone and 51 U Janefield). The 6:50 a.m. and 7:20 a.m. departures will no longer be offered.

A new morning departure at 7:20 a.m. from the University Centre will be offered.

The 10:30 p.m. departure will no longer be offered Monday to Friday.

Visit guelphtransit.ca for route schedules, maps, and trip planning.

CONTACT US

519-822-1811 TTY 519-837-5731 2018Jan_Ontarion ad.indd 1

transit@guelph.ca guelphtransit.ca 05/12/2017 1:30:38 PM

© 2017 ALEX AND ANI, LLC

STONE ROAD MALL

Contact us today for more info!

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