sally

We start the day wearing the mom hat getting the kids and Hubby ready for the day. Then in a mad rush we make ourselves presentable for the day and flip on the taxi driver hat and head out the door. Drop everyone off where they belong and quick, get the employee hat. Eight hours later it’s back to the taxi driver hat. Pick up the kids and hurry back home. Grab the chef hat and get a meal on the table before there is a meltdown. The Hubby gets home. Slip into the wife hat and catch-up on his day while the kids are trying to slam on the mom hat because they want to playyyyyy outside in the diiiirrrrrttt!

If you’re lucky, Hubby takes them out to play in the dirt. You, very reluctantly, force on the maid hat and do a quick pick up of the disaster area you call your house. The bugs come out…the kids come in, and it’s back on with the mom hat for baths, jammies and snacks, (if your kids are like mine they eat constantly). FINALLY, its bedtime. You don the storyteller hat and enjoy a few minutes of quiet calm before the kids are off to sleepy time. Now must be your time, you think, but you head downstairs to find Hubby with the lover hat in hand… You have got to be kidding!

Ok Ladies, your day may not be exactly like that, but I know you wear just as many hats! Of all the hats you wear how many are just for you and you alone? I see it all the time. Women give and give and give and have no idea how to receive. We forget that receiving is an important part of the circle of life! So, what about you? What if you took time to fill yourself up? And what if filling yourself up gave you more energy so you could continue to give back AND feel happy and inspired while doing so?

How do you do that?

It starts slowly and requires commitment. And, yes, you are worth it. Taking time for you could range from spending 5 minutes in quiet solitude each day, to buying yourself flowers, to taking a walk or bubble bath. It doesn’t matter what it is as long as it fills your tank.

We have been trained that it is not ok to take care of our own needs. Somehow it is selfish. Here’s the thing. Ladies, if we don’t take time for ourselves and give back to ourselves, we will end up tired, bitter and resentful! You need to fill yourself up before you can give to others.

In the hustle of our busy lifestyles we forget that we have permission to give ourselves self care. In my experience I think it’s how we start to lose who we are. We start putting off those fun things we enjoy because of the ‘have to’s’ the ‘should’s’ and the ‘I really need to’s’. It’s time to stop “shoulding ” on you! Think of it this way, if you take the time to do good things for yourself and take care of yourself, you are teaching your sons and daughters to do just that! You want them to grow up and be happy and fulfilled, right? For that to happen they need to see you being just that!

So the moral of this story is to find those things you enjoy and find a way to do it! For example, get together with friends. Recently, some friends and I planned an evening together. We hired a babysitter to watch the kids while we grilled out. We had such a great night. We felt spoiled and enjoyed every second! Another example is my stay-at- home-supermom friend who plans something for herself one weekend a month. She does it without guilt. She is a great mom that enjoys herself when she is with her kids because she knows she gets her tank filled regularly!

I am putting out a challenge to all of you! In the next 90 days fill your tank regularly. Find something you enjoy and do it. Be conscious of how you feel and know that being a happy woman, a fulfilled woman translates into being a better mom.

I want to hear from you and the plans you have made to be selfish for yourself! Write me at Jodie@corepassion.com. Stop shoulding on yourselves, Ladies, and just do it!